#also need some feedback on the cursor i made
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Right Of Way Postmortem
Well, it’s been a little while since my last blog post. Week 9 was extremely busy, so I didn’t have time to make a post until now, as I was at the Sunshine Coast for most of week 9 and working on the One Page for IGB220 assignment 2.
In week 9, we got into groups to start on assessment item 3, which is focused on playtesting, analysing feedback and trends, then resolving issues by making changes to the prototype. As we spent this lesson finding group members and discussing assessment 3, I didn’t have time to playtest Right Of Way during class, so instead I playtested with my cousins while I was at the Sunshine Coast.
From these playtests, the following information was collected:
Playtest 1
I explain what the controls are (always looks towards the mouse, left click to go faster towards the mouse
Confused as to why they go at an angle at first (sidescroller physics)
Dodge first waves of pedestrians easily
Survives 22 seconds on first run
Comments that they move left and right faster than up and down
Wants to use right click for something
Survives 34 seconds on second run
Not very interested in continuing to play as there isn’t much variety
Never understood why they go left and right more than up and down
Playtest 2
I explain what the controls are (always looks towards the mouse, left click to go faster towards the mouse
Survived 41 seconds on first try
No comments during first game
Finds out that they hide at the edges of the screen
Sits at the edge of the screen for about 30 seconds
Discovers that you wobble a lot if your cursor is over the bike (due to the code of turning towards the cursor)
States that they think that they don’t think pedestrians walk down the edge of the screen
Comments on pedestrians going faster
Eventually goes back into the middle of the screen and then hits a pedestrian at ~2:25
Next game they comment on there not being any point to going forwards
Goes slightly off the bottom of the screen and realises they don’t die if they go off the screen
Hits a pedestrian while off the bottom of the screen
The main things I found from the playtests were:
Boundaries: I had forgotten to restrict the player so they couldn’t go to the edge of the screen
Lose condition: I hadn’t added the zone at the bottom of the screen to kill the player if they were too slow and went off the bottom of the screen
Background: It wasn’t clear to players that the camera was moving, needs some sort of moving background to give a sense of speed
Obstacles: Needs more variety in obstacles to increase engagement
New Obstacle: Should add an obstacle that approaches sideways to prevent the player staying at the bottom of the screen
After playtesting, I quickly added the boundaries on each side of the screen, as well as the lose condition detection box. However, I didn’t have time to add any new obstacles or the moving background as I was working on my one page for IGB220 assessment 2. All I needed to do for the background was make two identical backgrounds that reappeared just above the camera whenever they were no longer visible, and I decided that the new obstacle should be a road with a pedestrian crossing. At certain times, a car will drive through the crossing going from one side of the screen to the other. I could make this timed to always cross over at the bottom of the screen so that the player must move forwards.
Overall, I am pretty happy with this project, and this course as a whole. Right Of Way was the easiest to create of all of the games so far both in terms of mechanics and prototyping gDevelop, and is my favourite of the three games made in class. Part of this is due to the playtesting showing that the core gameplay loop is working, and partly due to how easy the mechanics are to explain or learn. I could easily see myself polishing and releasing Right Of Way as a proper game at a later date.
I can also safely say that I have fulfilled three of the goals I set in the first post already, with the only one not completed being ‘a greater understanding of each phase in game design, going from first concepts to prototypes’. I feel like I understand the conceptualisation, prototyping and playtesting stages, but it feels like there is still a step missing between conceptualisation and prototyping, which I hope we explore before the end of the subject.
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WEEK 13 Postmortem
After participating in the Halloween spooky playtesting in week 2, I received a lot of feedback. However, I made only a few improvements because I didn't have much time; I still had to complete other assignments. The four weeks of development experience have given me valuable insights. Firstly, I am grateful that I knew what I wanted to do by week 9 because I noticed that some groups were still in the discussion phase by week 10, which would inevitably compress their programming time. I'm also pleased that I was able to complete the main development of the game and conduct playtests at week 11 because I knew that designing a high-quality game requires multiple iterations, and playtesting is essential for that, and the earlier, the better.
Among all the testing feedback, one comment stands out: two people suggested shortening the length of the player's laser (in weeks 10 and 11). Generally, players tend to lean towards offense rather than defense. (This is also why I designed multiple weapons to fire simultaneously in this game.) Players tend to want more powerful weapons, and I thought a longer laser would look more powerful and should meet their needs. However, players complained that the "laser is too long." I don't remember why I didn't ask them for further clarification, but from subsequent feedback, I speculate it may be because they couldn't see the position of the cursor clearly. So I reduced the visibility of the player's laser and replaced the cursor with a much larger crosshair. After these changes, no players complained about the length of the laser.
Another interesting observation is that players really prefer to go on the offensive. Even if they get killed, they are more likely to attribute it to insufficient firepower rather than lack of defense. I wasn't entirely unaware of this phenomenon; I've played or learned about some games that emphasize offense, such as Blade & Soul and Assassin's Creed Mirage, where the variety of weapons and combat items far exceeds that of armour. But witnessing players' extreme behaviour in Space Marauder still left a strong impression on me. Most players readily choose Burst over Shield, and for the 2ndary Turret, Plasma is the choice of most players because it has the highest damage, although it's only for single-shot damage, and players don't calculate DPS based on fire rate. I think the phenomenon of "players really like to go on the offensive" may guide me in designing future games, even though I personally enjoy survival games and prioritize defense. Maybe it's a good design to label a weapon with a prominent DPS value for the players like Diablo 3 and 4 did.
(BTW, as a designer, shouldn't we prioritize calculating DPS when evaluating a weapon rather than just looking at its raw damage?)
As for the overall project development process, even though I've been enthusiastic throughout, it seems that my teammates don't share the same enthusiasm. This phenomenon is not unique to IGB220; it has occurred in other courses as well, and unfortunately, I'm also one of the "unenthusiastic team members" in other assignments. A long time ago, someone told me that playing games and making games are very different, and now I truly feel that. I used to think that students who chose this course were all people who loved making games, but now it seems that many people just enjoy playing and don't really like making games.
I've heard some rumours about the capstone projects, and it seems that there are more projects focused on creating software rather than games. This makes me a bit uneasy.
The game can be played on gd.games:
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Asteroids development post
The initial asteroids game was made using tutorial resources with extras added onto the game. The game as it is stands is a basic asteroid game where the objective of the game is to shoot asteroids of different sizes - small, medium and large. The player has 10 lives and loses 3 when in contact with a large, 2 with medium and 1 with small. The extras added onto the game come from the visuals wanting to elicit a response from the player such as having VFX when destroying an asteroid, each time an asteroid is destroyed they spew out debris in random directions and an explosion sound plays when destroyed. Larger asteroids shoot out more debris compared to medium and small to elicit an almost larger reward. When the ship takes damage ship parts also fly away from the ship to signal that it has taken damage, the amount of ship parts relates to the damage taken as when coming into contact with a large asteroid the ship spews out 3 ship parts. The laser gun also has sfx when firing as well as the ship has an engine running sound when moving. A background was added onto the game to match the context, since the ship sprite from the resources given to us is a pyramid the best context in my opinion was to place an image of the pyramid ships from Destiny 2 on the background.
Using ideas from the Games Design Workshop (Fullerton, T. ,2018) on where to go next, I pulled some ideas from chapter 6 talking about brainstorming and conceptualization. Since we are working in tutorial classes with other students Its good to take the idea of no criticism of not blocking the ideas of other about my game before they are tested and put into practice. It's also good to find a playful environment where I work best at, I find working at home to be too distracting with my PC and other games begging me to run them so I like to go and find a place on campus with a nice large table and chair, close to a power port, outside if the weather calls for it and then put on some noise cancelling headphones and jam out to some music while using Gdevelop. When thinking of new ideas and gaining insights from playtesting it's good to go for a healthy number of ideas and not to bloat them with useless ideas. When pulling these insights, I would like to organize them into a list creation of sorts as the method helps to me to write down a lot of ideas while organizing them at the same time.
After asking a student in my tutorial class to brainstorm some insights after playtesting this version of the game he came back to me with some good notes I organized into a list. The things I did well were the asteroid explosion effects and the movement being smooth, but he also did something during playtesting I never thought of, since my laptop is touch screen it adds a new element of play, as instead of using the mouse cursor to control the ship he used his fingers and held over the asteroids he wanted to destroy and where the ship had to go. Though this was unintended I did get feedback saying that this was a good inclusion of controls and accessibility features.
The things I was prompted to improve are the asteroids needing a reduced and better hitbox as sometimes lives would be lost by being too close to the asteroid even though it appears physical contact was not made. The lives text should be bigger and easier to see as well as being different such as maybe using symbology such as having ten ship models on the top of the screen to better track the lives of the ship. Technically with the touch controls the game did become too easy and was given the insight of needing a secondary objective such as maybe having objects appear that would need to be captured by navigating the asteroids from one side of the screen to the other.
Ideas for future addons instead of fixes were the inclusion of a secondary weapon to fire at the asteroids by utilizing the right mouse button to fire missiles instead. Having movement mechanics added on such as dodges or boosts by double tapping a button. The addition of dodges would lead into other enemies being needed, my own idea would be to have enemy ships firing at the player and they would need to fight back and fire at them. The biggest issue was the lack of a restart button to press once the player died.
Fullerton, T. (2018). Game Design Workshop: A Playcentric Approach to Creating Innovative Games. ProQuest Ebook. Retrieved from: Chapter 4: Working with Dramatic Elements | Game Design Workshop, 3rd Edition (oreilly.com)
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Asteroids - Development Post 2 - Insights
What have I learned?
Balancing elements:
How to add as many elements as possible to game design is a problem that designers often pay attention to. But too many poorly designed elements can lead to a very bad gaming experience. For example, boring game mechanics and poor operability can make players quit the game within a minute. As the actual controller of the game, the player's subjective experience is very important.
When I started designing the asteroid theme, I tried to make a space shooter very casually. With the help of the course materials, I made a very rough prototype of the game. In this prototype, movement is controlled by mouse and keyboard. But the keyboard does not have the function of moving left and right, only forward. The screen was cluttered and crowded with asteroids, and I couldn't see the cursor. I strongly disapprove of this operation, which is reflected in my subjective experience as a player testing this prototype. Also, I don't think the points system makes any sense, it's just numbers. So I put the focus of the game on the gameplay and the performance of the game screen, and added the corresponding plot. I think one of the ways to give a game its soul is to add a background setting to it.
Jump out of the limit circle:
Since then, I've been trying to explore and study Gdevelop, trying to find a new way to help me prototype games. Gradually, as my experiences and memories began to help me find inspiration, I discovered that I didn't need to limit myself to a small area. I could do an asteroid theme, but the genre is STG game. So, I completely handed over the operation to the keyboard, which greatly improved the operation feel. After that, and based on that, I was gradually able to add more inspirations like boss fights and enhancement mechanics.
One of the biggest difficulties designers face when designing games are limits. Limits can destroy inspiration, concepts, and even the game itself. What is created under restrictive thinking is very bad and can seriously affect the player's gaming experience. Moreover, we are not only designers, but also players. We need to think from multiple perspectives and try to listen to the outside world. Finally, design with your own unique ideas under critical thinking. In this way, we can jump out of the limit circle and enter a new framework to better display inspiration and ideas.
Playtesting and feedbacks:
I shared a game demo with my friend Gary to give him a try. Here are some of his personal views:
The game atmosphere is created well. The fast-moving background reflects my sense of purpose as a game character. Boss battles made me feel more engaged.
The difficulty of the boss battle is gradually increased, and there is no discordant experience. As more and more bullets stress me out, I become more focused and excited.
The boss bullet sound effect is good, the first laser scare me.
There seems to be some issues with the hitbox of player-controlled ships. I tried to hide between two missiles. Visually, I could dodge, but I was hit by two missiles.
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Project 2: Typographic Abstraction
Note: The above images are process images for Project 2. Please view the images' alt texts for descriptions of each one's contents and significance. To do this, hover over an image with the cursor and click the "ALT" button that appears in the bottom left corner of the image.
Process:
I will admit that typographic abstraction was a challenge for me for several reasons. For starters, I went into this project unfamiliar with the Adobe Illustrator program. While I had a general idea of how the program should work from my prior experiences with a similar Adobe application, Photoshop, it was still difficult to learn the different locations and functions of Illustrator-specific tools.
The pathfinder and pen/anchor tools were the most difficult to understand because pathfinder does not exist in Photoshop, and I never needed to use the pen/anchor tool in my past Photoshop projects. Additionally, I found myself struggling to consider both positive and negative space when grouping and modifying the letterforms with the pathfinder.
Through hours of trial and error and dozens of "practice designs", I eventually found myself more familiar with the program's tools. Only after getting used to the technical aspects of Illustrator was I able to explore creative uses of positive and negative space with the letterforms. I found myself more interested in exploring the program's abilities than I expected myself to be, which led me to create multiple iterations of my prototype designs, as well as complete overhauls of the designs in Artboards 1 and 3 (see process photos above for these iterations). I think that my finalized designs are fairly successful in terms aesthetics and composition, though there is always room for improvement.
After working through the challenges presented by Project 2, I have become knowledgeable in the basics of Adobe Illustrator. Even though I have only scratched the surface of Adobe Illustrator and typographic design, I feel my typographic abilities have been vastly improved already. I know these new skills will help me be more successful in designing and using typography in future projects and my career.
Text Reflection:
Chapter 3 of the text provided valuable insights about entering the design world as a startup studio, as well as helpful information about partnerships. All of the partners who were interviewed had practical experience with starting studios, which made me feel like I could trust what they were saying. I resonated most with the partnerships that emphasized honest feedback and dialogue between partners, employees, and clients. I personally always enjoy receiving and implementing feedback and suggestions from others, because I want my work to be the best it can be. The suggestion that this is commonplace procedure in studios makes me excited about my prospective future in the field.
Beyond the commonality of all the interviewees being pioneers of their own design partnerships, I noticed another common theme, which was that they all cited naivety and confidence as the driving forces that allowed them to start their own studios. At some point, you just have to jump in; you can't get cold feet. This made me realize that I need to work on being more confident in my abilities and in myself if I want to be successful in the design field.
While the information in chapter 3 was applicable to my future, I felt that chapters 4 and 5 were the most pertinent to my present situation, specifically in regards to Project 2. Learning about how much time and effort type designers put into the production of individual font families made me feel better about how much time and effort I was putting into the project. I now realize that working with fonts is a meticulous, time-consuming process, even for professionals. I also valued the visual examples of logos given at the end of chapter 5; they helped me understand that professional logo designers often combine letterforms in divergent ways, as we did in the project, to create appealing icons for their clients.
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10 Issues Everyone Is aware of About Minecraft Server Hosting That You do not
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Getting Work Right
Office Romance + (Pinch of) Slow Burn + Luke
For @5-secondsofcolor
Written for Graduation Blurb Weekend. Going until May 8th.
Gender Neutral Reader Insert.
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The screen in front of your eyes feels like it’s taunting you. You’ve been staring at this report for the last half hour. You needed to somehow get together the performance reports to show your boss and his superiors the new changes to the machines and testing strategies are working, but somehow all the cursor seems to be doing is blinking…and blinking….and blinking. “For fuck sake.”
A soft chuckle comes from your right and you look over. The new hire, Luke, grins and looks up at you. “Everything okay over there?”
“I-I am alive,” you return.
“Do you need some help?” he offers.
“I need a new job,” you laugh. “It’s just there’s reports everywhere. I like have forgotten where half this shit is.”
Luke scoots behind from his desk a little. “I think I was CC’d on those biweekly reports. I can print them down if it’ll help. Maybe you just need a break from the screen for a bit. Which reports do you need?”
“The last four months. From when the new changes were implemented.”
Luke nods, and scoots back to his desk. You watch him for a moment longer. His screen fills with his emails. You know you’re staring, trying to trace the angle and cut of his jaw. He looks studious, sitting up in the office chair and scrolling. He’d been added on the team about six months ago and initially, the whole office was fawning over him. You’d seen it--his icy blue eyes, the way he squealed out his laughter, the broad muscles and the expanse of his shoulders.
You weren’t his direct supervisor, but you were one of the people that oversaw his training. He’s a quick learner, and liked getting pretty consistent feedback. There was something about that line of trainer and trainee that you really hadn’t wanted to cross. But now, as Luke scrolls through hundreds of emails possibly just to print down eight measly reports makes you question that divisive line.
“It might take me a minute. But thankfully, they’re all titled the same thing. So I just need to separate out duplicates,” Luke mutters.
You don’t know if it’s mostly for him or for you. “Don’t worry about it if it’s too much of a hassle. I probably just need a coffee for this midafternoon slump and I can get through it.”
“Oh no, it’s not too much of a hassle. I’m currently hiding from other things in my inbox. Help me be irresponsibly responsible.”
The two of you share a moment’s laughter. Luke taps at his keys and then resumes scrolling. “I have this months and last month’s printing. It might take me a minute or two longer on the other two.”
“How do you take your coffee?”
“Light. Admittedly, way too light,” Luke laughs. “Or I just take it black. Depends on the day really.”
“What kind of day is it today?”
“Black coffee kind of day, I think,” he returns, watching you stand from your desk.
“I’ll return soon. Coffee and reports and all.”
He nods and for two or three moments too long, he watches you walk down towards the kitchen, which he knows you have to pass the printer. A small sigh escapes him. He wanted to ask you out. You also smiled so brightly at him. He liked catching up about his weekend activities with you and listening to your adventures too. Both of you like music and Luke was constantly trying to find new bands and artists to recommend to you. It made his heart swell when you’d report back that you’d listened to the artist and enjoyed them. He loved when you’d swap artist too.
But it was slow. The two of you weren’t even sure if you were it was even a fire to dance around. You wanted to make Luke laugh, just to hear him laugh and the way he throws his head back when something really tickles him. But he was your coworker and you weren’t even sure if that was something the office would allow. So you stick to this, poorly flirting about coffee orders and music recommendations.
The machine stops hissing, and the drips start to fall down into the glass container. You watch them fall drip by drip until the pot is full. You pour two mugs full. You stop by the printers, and grab the reports--six of the eight--and tuck them up under your arm before resuming carrying the drinks. The distance isn’t long, but you try not to stare at the way he looks at his desk and the way you know he’s doing more work that needs to be to help you.
You settle down the mug for his cup. “One black coffee for my knight in paper armor,” you tease. The realization hits you and you quickly settle into your desk chair. Where in the fuck did that come from?
Luke laughs from next to you. “Thank you my liege. I’m still searching for the last two. They’re here. Just buried. I think that was like the month that I started being on my own, so things sort of exploded then.”
“No worries. I really appreciate you searching for it.” You want to say again that he really doesn’t need to waste the time, but he seems so adamant about it. He looks so cute, chewing his bottom lip in concentration.
You know you’re staring when Luke turns his head a little. “Is-is there something?”
“No, no, no, I’m sorry.” You turn quickly back to your desk. When he prints down the last two reports, you give him a quick thanks and run to the printer.
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The weeks speed by, the end of the year is also a massive push to get things sorted before Christmas break. Though, it never really felt like a break as the emails still trickled in from other clients and the to-do list never really shrunk, it only got pushed to the new year. Luke places a mug down onto your desk, his jacket still billowing behind him.
“Oh, thank you.” It falls out in a whisper as you watch him settle down into the chair next to you.
“How long have you been here?” The sun’s just starting to peek in through the curtains.
You rub your eyes. “Way too long. I don’t think I really slept much because of this meeting with the executives. They’re impressed by the new training changes and such. But now they want SOPs before the new year once we hire again.”
“But how long have you been here?” Luke asks again. He doesn’t like the look of the bags forming of your eyes and the way your shoulders slump.
“Uh, I left at five like usual. Got dinner and tried to sleep. Woke up at like 4:30 and just figured I’d come in.”
“It’s barely 8 now. And what--you’re just going to do a twelve hour shift? We’re barely paid for our overtime.”
“I’ll have the SOP’s for our department finished.” You shrug.
“What time did you get in?”
“5:20? I don’t really know. I saw the sun rise.” You turn back to your desk. “Thanks for the coffee.”
Luke watches you for a moment, your fingers taping over your keys. “Go home.”
“What? I can’t. I have--”
“You need sleep. At least take a nap or something. We still have the rest of the week for SOPs.”
“I’m tasked with editing two other departments. I need to get them done by today.”
“I can edit them,” Luke offers. “Something. You’re drowning over here.’
“I’ll be okay.” The first sip of the coffee slips down and you almost don’t taste it. It’s your second cup of the morning. It won’t be your last cup today so you pace yourself.
Luke watches as you continue on, taking screenshots, adding them to the document. He watches you format the text to wrap around the photos. You seem to be speeding through it and Luke’s not sure how you manage it. He has to leave for a meeting but before he does, he drops a hand to your shoulder. “Take it easy while I’m gone.”
You nod at the comment, still buried into your screen. “I’ll try to.” But even as you say it, you know that you won’t be slowing down. You won’t be taking it easy. You can’t. The cursor on the screen starts to blur. Your eyes burn. You know you should probably call it quits.
Luke returns, watching you blinking rapidly at the screen. He sighs, knowing he was supposed to work on transcribing those notes and getting them sent out ot the team. But his heart can’t bear watching you working yourself so hard.
“Seriously. I said take it easy,” he says softly in jest, but also in seriousness.
“No, I’m okay. I promise.”
“Yeah right,” he scoffs, setting his legal pad down. “C’mon.” He holds out his hands for yours. You shake your head, keeping your strained eyes trained on the screen. Luke sighs. “Save the document.”
You follow that direction, knowing that you should save it, since it’s been a moment. Once Luke sees the save taken, he pulls your chair away from the desk. “You’re going to take a nap.”
“Wait no--I need, the SOPs.” You reach for the desk, but Luke’s faster. He gets the chair completely out from the desk and spins the chair around.
“The SOPs aren’t going anywhere. But you need rest. You’ve been here six hours. You need nap and some lunch and then you come back to this fresh. You’re lucky I’m not sending you home.”
“Hey,” you return, popping up from the seat. “You’re not my direct supervisor.”
“Yeah, but I care about you! So, go nap. Or something. You’ve saved your work. You’ve been here so long. Please take care of yourself.”
You fold your arms. “I’ll go to bed early tonight.”
“You’re just saying that so you leave me alone. But no, I will march you done to the lounge myself.”
“People are going to be in there. Lounging, like they should be able to do.”
Luke sighs. You’re right. But he’s also worried. The two of you stare each other down. You try not to take in just how impossibly long his lashes are, and the way his chest expands as he breathes in deeply. “You need rest.”
“I need to finish SOPs.”
Luke walks around the chair. “The SOPs aren’t going to run away.” Your face is worn down. “Please. Just an hour and a half. For me.”
He says it softly. You hate the way he looks so scared and worried. “Fine.”
“I’ll be sure to wake you.”
You nod, one hand resting on his forearms. He watches you head down the hallways and out of the office space. His arm holds the ghost of the heat of you. Luke wants to hate it, hate the way his gut flips. But he holds the feeling, holds the memory of your touch and his stomach fluttering as close as he can while you’re gone. Luke watches over your desk. It holds the ghost of you.
As his timer goes off, he pulls away from the desk. In the lounge, Luke finds it dark. Normally, there are plenty of people to be leaning, making coffee, chatting. But it is dark and quiet. You’re curled up on the corner of the couch. Your face is clear of worry lines. You look so at peace with your lips slightly agape. Luke almost feels like he can’t interrupt that. But he knows if he lets you sleep any longer, you’ll throw a fit.
Luke gently shakes your shoulders as he settles into the squat. “Hey, it’s been an hour and a half,” he says softly.
You turn your head. “Hmm, five more minutes.”
He laughs, watching you blink open your heads. “I mean, I’m willing to give it to you.”
“SOPs--fuck!” And like a bolt of lightning,you sit up straight.
“Hey, they’re still waiting on you. How do you feel after some rest?” His hands hover, wanting to trace the line of your jaw but knowing he can’t.
“A little bit better,” you nod. You notice how close the two of you are. You can see every blink Luke takes. The way his lips turn up slightly into a tiny smile. You don’t want it to be any different. The moment of closeness lingers. The two of you watching the other, inhales becoming exhales and the two of you can’t pull away. Not at first. But you can hear someone’s heels clicking and you slide down the couch to stand up.
“Better get back,” you start, throwing your thumb over your shoulder.
Luke nods, standing up and smoothing his hands over his dress pants. “Yeah, yeah, we should.”
________________
The store feels way too crowded. You need the wrapping paper and a few house toiletries, but the thing you don’t need is the crowd. You curse yourself for not doing this sooner, but work got in the way. The wheel of your cart squeaks a little as you wind down the aisle. Someone cuts through the main aisle that you’re trying to get into and you have to pull back. “Sorry,” you call out and the figure turns.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t see you!”
“Luke?”
“Hey, hey! How are you?”
“I’m good. Just Christmas shopping, really. I decided to wait until the last minute. So you know, some repercussions,” you laugh. “What about you?”
“Same. I’m like so bad at remembering these sorts of things.”
“Are you going home for the holidays?” you ask.
“Uh, they’re coming to my place, actually. What about you?” Luke asks.
“I’m going to my parent’s place for a few days.”
He nods. “When are you headed out?”
“Two days. I’m normally so good about these things. But work’s been…well, you know!” you laugh. The two of you continue to talk, you mentioning that one of Luke’s favorite bands are going to be coming into town the week after New Year’s.
Luke, who had been aware of the upcoming tour, blinks in surprise. “Uh, yeah, I was getting tickets actually. How did you know?”
You shrug, trying to hide the embarrassment. “I--I know they’re your favorite, so I kept tabs.”
“That’s really sweet,” Luke says. The air stills for a moment. Luke’s at the midpoint of your basket and you’re at the handles. He’s watching the way you slowly blink at his words. He can’t help it anymore. “Do you want to go to the concert with me?”
“What?” you ask. “Are you sure?”
Luke nods. “I’ve--” he clears his throat. Is he really going to confess? He’d read the office rules. It wouldn’t be against the rules. But he still. He couldn’t get a read. Maybe this would be the quickest way.
Your heart races but you nod. “Yeah, I’d love to. If you’re sure.”
“I’m sure. Beyond sure,” he exhales.
#luke hemmings#luke hemmings blurb#luke hemmings imagine#luke hemmings fic#luke hemmings fanfic#h writes#h's graduation celebration blurb weekend#luke hemmings x reader#luke hemmings x gender neutral insert#5sos#5 seconds of summer#5sos fanfic#5sos fic#5sos imagine#luke hemmings fluff#5 seconds of summer fanfic#5 seconds of summer fic#5 seconds of summer imagine
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First Blood
MASTERLIST
Characters: Henry Cavill x Reader (Oneshot)
Summary: Playing games with Henry can be crucial especially when all your teammates were boys because decisions from a gamer girl has always been disregarded resulting in you getting first blood because Henry’s new mouse also wanted to annoy the heck out of you in rank game.
Warnings: FLOOF. Curses. Shy reader who ain’t used to physical intimacy. Also reader having her own issues about it. (Probably trauma but it isn’t said specifically) Making out. Daddy-kink. Reader just doesn’t know how to react with her own kinks. Martin is just a name I’ve come up with as Henry’s friend. The game is in a group of five in this one. A lil’ bit of sexual tension too?
Words: 2.5k
A/N: Y’all don’t know how difficult it is to find a girl who plays MMO games out there. *sits here while I play with my guild full of men where I panic every time I play because I feel judged by them 😭😂 I’M A NOOB, ALRIGHT. 😭😫😂) Also, when I’m left alive they kept telling me what to do and where the heck are the enemies when I don’t see them which doesn’t result to winning for the team HAHAHA 😭😂😂 *tries to control my armpit kink when seeing the GIF LMAO*
Don’t forget to REBLOG, COMMENT OR GIVE FEEDBACK IF YOU DID LOVE THIS ONESHOT! IT’LL MAKE ME SMILE! Sorry for the grammatical errors and such because English isn’t my mother tongue! PLEASE LEAVE FEEDBACK AFTER READING, BB!
Disclaimer: PNG’s and pictures used in edits are not mine even the GIF’s too. However, the edits and this oneshot is definitely from moi.
MY WORKS ARE NOT NOT NOT NOT NOOOOOOT TO BE POSTED ON ANY OTHER WEBSITES. My official username in Wattpad is “TATATHEPOTATO” and that’s the only other site I have for writing aside from Tumblr. Thank you, Tater tots!
"You were too far from me. I needed back-up. Where were you?"
"I'm sorry---I'm sorry, the new mouse was acting pretty strange for a moment there. Forgive me?"
"Hmmph."
Henry heard an intentional huff from his side, making him glance to see you pulling your own headphones off with a frown. You were clearly upset because it hasn't been two minutes yet and you were dead; not even having a chance to grab onto some weapons before a group of high-ranked team shot you dead as they tried to loot inside the tent where you hid.
They left you alone at the location you've pinned from the map, ignoring your protests of having one team mate with you because Henry accidentally chose the other way because of his mouse problem reasons.
"Nugget, don't be mad at me." your boyfriend lowly and sweetly apologized, his tone slightly begging when he saw you stand up from your game chair, announcing to grab onto some snacks while you be their watcher due to dying early.
You ignored his sweet talk, putting up an act that you were mad.
"---Give me a kiss before you go."
He frowned and silently mumbled in between loudly typing on his keyboard; his pretty blue eyes still focused on his monitor screen. Henry maneuvered his character in the safest position where he couldn't be found before ticking his mic off in the game. He raised a brow, pulling his headset down and around his neck whilst turning his game chair around. You were pulled by your wrist to stop you from leaving and with sassy brows, you answered in a piqued tone that made him look at you with a knowing look from your sudden surly attitude.
"No. I don't want to."
Being the one who wanted to lower his pride, your boyfriend suggestively held a finger up, telling him how many he wanted, wiggling his brows in the process and pursing his mouth. The image of his stache making you stifle a giggle before him as he pursed his lips more, suggesting for a smooch, "Just one kiss,"
"Why are you always touchy?"
"It's how I am, love." Henry was quick to answer, his timbre was soothing and deep. Such pitch that could get your heart humming with profound affection as you felt the heat go to your cheeks, his straightforwardness over asking if he could get a kiss always gets you bashful because you weren't one woman who was used to physical display of affection.
Surprising to say that your boyfriend loved it and would even do everything just to take anything from you. He was an intimate lover and you were most definitely reserved, shy and quiet. Seldom to be the first to reach out for a hug or a kiss.
Henry was being punished for it because he definitely preferred his skin on yours all the time specifically from the moment he knew he was deeply in love with you.
"Would you want me not to be sweet with you then?" the latter frowned, his pretty baby blues glazing with disappointment for a second before it changed into comprehension; grasping about why you were aloof in the world of intimacy and physical display, "---I know you're not used to physical affection at all---but, if you want me to stop because you think I'm being too over the top, needy or clingy then tell me,"
He dropped his hand away from your wrist like you've burnt his skin, realizing what he was asking from you. His fist falling on his clothed knee as he sympathetically stared straight into your eyes. His height and burly body build being much of an advantage over you as he sat eye to eye; standing before him in your full height already.
You've given him a tight smile, hesitantly shaking your head as you stepped a foot closer to Henry, your knee touching his whilst drowning in his oceans and muttering in the softest voice you could muster.
"But, I don't want you to stop at all."
"Then, why are you so timid with me?" Henry's claret colored lips lifted into an adorn beam, his teeth and those adorable fangs sneaking for a peep when he'd felt you grab onto his hand, interlocking and filling the spaces of his fingers with yours, "---I'll help you with that if you want me to," he playfully suggested. Though, you doubt he meant that he'll help you by having sex because he was a gentleman at heart; his eyes hopeful to see the bricks break with your own barricade in that department.
His smile grew wider when you've timidly tuck a strand of hair behind your ears with your free hand, your lover taking it as a sign to lean his face closer, tilting his head and puckering his lips; his focus on your awaiting lips. Henry was practically a strand close to be giving you a sweet peck before he leaned away to examine your blushing face, stopping in the midst of giving you a smooch.
"Is it because of the kingstache? I don't sound too pushy, do I?"
Intently looking into his sea of blues, you've felt you heart racing a marathon as your own boyfriend was unaware of his effect on you; he was always keeping your mind blank with just a simple look from him. Becoming one speechless and disfunctioning lady when he was being too sweet with you.
He was just a sweetheart, always understanding you in terms of the issues you had for yourself.
Taking all the willpower in one go, you've grabbed onto a little bit of your confidence and began to do the first move, leaning over Henry's face before pulling back to see him playfully wiggling his eyebrows in a teasing manner. He nodded enthusiastically, giving approval to do whatever you wanted and it wasn't a second to feel your palms on either side of his face; attacking his lips with a bruising kiss that made him grunt before your chapped lips.
His fingers clasped onto the side of your hip; automatically pushing you closer to him as he'd licked the tip of your vermillion, moisturizing your dry ones. Taking heed that you should probably grab onto some lipbalm when you leave the room. His wet tongue made you gasp; hungry for more as he licked the roof of your mouth.
The game room filling with sounds of passionate kisses, hypnotized by what effects it was giving you; how lightheaded it could make you feel. Henry was still giving your lip a gentle nudge with his, enamored from the sudden assault you've managed to lure him in. Out of the blue, you ceased kissing him. A definite amount of space between you both while deeply staring into his eyes.
"No. I love your kingstache and I likey-like-like this touchy-feely characteristic of yours. It makes me feel loved," with an anxious bite of your lip, you felt his rough, calloused thumb reach out to flick along the bottom of your vermillion; mindlessly telling you to stop with that unhealthy habit of yours whenever you were apprehensive or worried about something.
"---Sorry if I'm complicated to understand, Henry." you quietly murmured to your boyfriend. He was about to open his mouth, catching him off-guard when you've delicately pressed another kiss to his lip. His stache tickling your cupid's bow which made you tenderly giggle against his mouth.
He smiled along your wholesome kiss, puckering back to touch and graze his own with yours in a honeyed buss. The latter had both hands on your hip as he sweetly and deeply spoke.
"I love you, alright? come sit on my lap while I play the game. Then, we'll talk more about this shyness of yours after the round,"
Henry pulled you on his lap; protests slipping past your lips with a loud beating of your heart because it was one of your fantasies to sit on those thick thighs of his, but you never tell nor do you want to treat him as if he was a pleasure toy that you could use. You've respected him just as much as he respected you and your personality.
Your loving boyfriend heard your feigned complaints; never one to know that you were faking it, he'd tutted behind in the midst of turning you to face his monitor. His thick, muscly thighs offering comfort over your restless thoughts and stiff body.
You couldn't help but squint your eyes back at the screen as Henry placed his headset back on his ears, "But, you're already dead?"
Lately realizing he was, Henry made a high-squeak sound of protest that made you laugh out loud.
"For fuck's sake---I am! I am dead!" he ticked the mic on again while holding onto his cursor, his other arm safely surrounding your small body sitting on his lap; his hold tightening when you began wiggling against him, you wanted to chat with his other team mates who they both didn't personally knew at all.
"Hey, mate." his friend lackadaisically spoke on the other line; completely focused on the on-going game. The loud sound of the keyboard being pressed repeatedly in the background of his friend's mic.
You were first-blood because Henry was too far for backup; he'd received a huff and a raise of your brow at that before you decided to leave a while ago which never happened because he decided not to wait until you were cranky enough to ignore him until dinner.
Starting with calling out the other players using Henry's account, you started venting; being stealthy about it as he was busy chatting with a friend of his, also swamped over giving your nape kisses that has got you wiggling more against his hold due to being ticklish over there.
"No backup, brother?"
He suddenly chuckled on mic, watching you lean away from his soft kisses and earning him a quiet mumble of 'stop it' in which his friend heard on the other end of the line.
You continued typing and calling his team mates noobs in capital letters; creating an act as if you were a toxic player without Henry's permission.
Noobmaster69's mic was blinking on the left side of the screen, letting you know he was talking to Henry as you basically continued to smash rude words on the keyboard.
"I've given backup, but I decided to let em' kill you because it seems like you have something to work on your lap,"
His friend snickered behind mic, scoffing after when Henry's gruff voice grumbled, sounding like he was dissappointed by the latter's antics.
"You left me to die. You're a great friend, Martin."
Martin cursed a loud one after shooting one player, earning the kill as the other two players were out in a far distance, minding their own businesses or probably lagging as well as he continued to talk, "Your girlfriend didn't turn off her mic by the way---might want to turn it off after I win this round for everyone because you people are fuckin' around in ranked game," he was loudly tapping the controls on his keyboard as he chattered away; multi-tasking over shooting players and talking to Henry, "---also---Oh, Christ!---try not to moan in the mic while we're in game,"
His friend audibly roared when he'd luckily claimed a headshot, "I don't wanna nut on my keyboard, Hank!"
Henry has cursed him through the mic, chuckling as he watched Martin's gameplay through his monitor. Lately seeing that you had been busy with your hands, ferociously typing at two team mates who were helping through the game.
His baby blues peeked from behind, intently watching your attentive and focused face in amusement. The oceans of his eyes glistening with sheer entertainment to see you grinning on his lap, his peepers casting the monitor screen a look before his smile fell for a hot second to read that you were cursing his team mates out.
"Stop calling them noobs, Nugget." he'd heard one team mate aggressively curse back at him via microphone in a different language---he knew it was a cuss based on how angry his mates were. Henry didn't know if he wanted to laugh over the headset, but he chose to shut his mouth off when Martin died a little later---the two noobs you were calling; became the people who would raise a flag for not having your rank down.
"You're getting me reported. Stop it right now," Henry lowly chuckled, his strong arms tightening around your waist as his stache tickled you on your neck by giving another soft peck.
You giggled and tried wresting out of his hold with thoughts coming from the impulsive part of your brain, shooting him an endearment that got his body going rigid under yours.
"Alright, Daddy."
Your boyfriend blinked repeatedly, his arm loosening once he realized what you've called him; a matter of being clumsy has always made him laugh. However, this accident surely intrigued his curiosity. You never called him that, even wincing and giggling over his video where he was reading thirst tweets from Buzzfeed, hearing you tell him that it was weird for people to call him that when you certainly had your own kinks as well.
Karma shot you on the ass because it eventually became your own kink as well, but he never knew about it.
It was a very good act you've did when you were trying hard to be a shy angel in his eyes, gradually evolving into a small devil when you were around his presence.
"What...did you just say?"
"Henry, I said Henry---I--I called you by your name."
You've felt his hold go limp, taking this as an opportunity to flee and forget your accident when he decided that it was best to keep you within arms reach. So, seeing you stand up and turn around to leave---Henry reached out to grab onto your waist, his thick fingers slipping away to be tugging at the waistband of your shorts, slightly yanking them down to see the smooth cheek of your bum as you wear a black thong.
He successfully pulled your back, earning him a high pitched squeal when you tried wrenching his hold away; never one to show Henry the deepest and secretive part of you which got him more needy over the fact that he was drawing a blank over your body, not knowing what it holds out for him.
Your ass fell flat on his thighs, sitting sideways as Henry used his sinewy arm to guide you from falling, caging you in his juicy arms that you love to caress and ogle at from time to time.
The roughness of Henry's fingers cascaded on your knee, slowly trailing up your thighs as he intently bore his eyes on you, searching for answers as to how such a lewd feeling came with calling him a 'daddy'.
His eyes shifted from staring straight at you to admiring how innocent you try to pretend in his eyes, glancing down your lips as he subtly licked his own.
"That's not what I heard, Love."
General taglist for Henry Cavill:
@agniavateira, @iloveyouyen, @rahdaleigh, @silverkitten547, @henrythickcavill, @kaatelyyynn
#Henry Cavill#henry cavill x you#henry cavill x y/n#henry cavill x reader#henrycavill#henry cavill x female reader#Henry cavill x small!fem!reader#henry cavill fluff#henry cavill fandom#henry cavill fanfic#henry cavill fic#henry cavill fanfiction#muse: henry cavill#hc#cavillry#henry cavill masterlist#seb-owns-these-tatas
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summertime sadness .5.
work day
Sequel to kiss me in the d-a-r-k
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 (masterlist under construction)
Warnings: dub con sex (fingering)
This is dark!(dad)Steve and dark(professor!)Bucky explicit. 18+ only. I know they aren’t super dark, but like questionable so I’m keeping those tags just to be safe.
Summary: Loki adds to your workload.
Note: Right, here we go, here we go, here go again. Girls, what's my weakness? Men! Sorry, minor detour there but are we ready for the darkness? Y'all hold onto your panties. Thanks everyone for their support and I love you all! 💋
<3 Let me know what you think in a reblog, reply, or like. I’m loving the feedback from y'all and the enthusiasm! Also as always, memes accepted.
💋💋💋
You didn’t sleep much. Every time you closed your eyes, the scene flashed behind your eyelids. Loki standing over you, the image on his phone, his hand on your chin. And then you thought of Bucky. It was hard not to; your phone buzzed all night as you ignored his messages. Steve’s too. It had finally caught up to you and it felt worse than you could imagine. A man you admired thought you nothing more than a floozy. Well, maybe you were.
Saturday shone through your window and you rolled over. You were exhausted; mentally, emotionally. Your hours were spent reprimanding yourself. Going over all your mistakes; every single choice that had led to such disaster. You sat up and rubbed your eyes. You moved slowly, your body cramped from the tension.
The grind of your coffee machine filled the apartment as you sat at your desk. A mark of your guilt. A gift from one illicit lover; another having defiled you a top it. A year ago, to think of all that had transpired, you would’ve been appalled. You were. You’d sold your integrity for fleeting pleasures. You felt cheated. By yourself more than any.
You filled a mug and grabbed your phone from beside your bed. You hadn’t looked at it since you laid down the night before. Missed calls, unanswered texts, unread emails. You answered Bucky first, a simple ‘I wasn’t feeling well. Sorry.’ Besides, he had plans with Tanya, or was busy dodging her.
You texted the same to Steve and his response was swift. Your phone vibrated as his ID flashed across the screen and you answered the call after several rings. You were weak, breathless.
“Hey,” You said quietly and sipped your coffee.
“Hey, you okay?” He asked.
“Fine,” You lied poorly. “Work’s kept me busy and… I guess it’s gotten ahead of me.”
“Oh,” He uttered. “Any plans today?”
“Rest,” You shrugged and sat back in your chair. “After I sort through all my work emails and catch up.”
“Bucky?” He asked.
“I… I’m tired.” You grumbled. “I… need a break.”
“I’m sure work would understand if you took a day to yourself.” Steve said.
“No, no, I can’t do that,” You said suddenly. “I wasn’t talking about work.”
“What do you--”
“You shouldn’t be calling me. You should call Kylie. See how she’s doing.” You interrupted. “And Bucky should worry about his students. About marking and whatever. And I need to think about myself and my job.” You stood and paced around the small space of your apartment. “I’m sorry but… you said it yourself. It’s okay to be selfish, so I’m going to be selfish and think about my future because fucking old men isn’t going to get me anywhere.”
You hung up before he could respond. And then your heart sank. Why had you said that? It all had spilled from you so quickly. You cringed and your phone began to buzz again. It was Steve. You let out a shaky breath and dismissed the call. You set your phone to do not disturb’ and tossed it on your bed. Maybe your words were rash but it didn’t make them any less true.
💋
Monday. You walked into Adder Press with a pit in your stomach. You were jittery from more than your morning coffee. You gripped the strap of your bag tightly as you passed Stacey. Everything around you seemed distant, obscured by the haze that fell over you. You sat at your desk, numb, and began to set out your stuff as you always did. In a desperate attempt to make it all feel normal again.
As you waited for your computer to boot, you felt a subtly weight on the back of your chair. You looked up at Loki as he gripped the chair and smirked down at you. You blanched and your pen slipped from your hand. He bent to grab it before you could and as he rose, he dragged the lid against your leg. He held it out and you snatched it from him.
“Morning meeting in five,” He said as he stood before you. “Then I wanted to go over layout with you. A useful lesson if you ever hope to be anything more than a freelancer. You have to have a good eye… for detail.”
You gulped and nodded. “Yes, okay, yeah.” You set the pen down on your desk. “Five minutes.”
He winked and left you there to stew in your shame. You glanced around but no one else seemed to notice your tense interaction. They were all too concerned with their own schedules, their own presence at the meeting. Really, who cared much about the summer intern?
You were antsy as you walked into the conference room. You hid between Vanessa, a political pundit, and Jory, who covered local business stories. Loki sat near the head of the table as the marketing head went over the final prints of the Pride issue. You folded your hands before you but couldn’t concentrate.
Your eyes wandered from the powerpoint and you found the editor-in-chief peering over at you. Another sinister grin sent a chill through you. You looked back to the screen and prayed for the day to go quickly. Your heart felt as if it would explode.
When you broke out, you dragged your feet and were the last out of the room. You lingered at your desk as you grabbed your notebook and pen. Loki’s office beckoned to you ominously. He stood in the doorway watching you; waiting for you. You neared him as his lips curled.
He shut the door and you jumped at the click. He brushed past you before he rounded his desk. He pulled a chair with him and placed it beside his. He waved you over. You took a breath and crossed to him. As you sat, he pinched your ass and you pressed your lips together to keep from yelping.
His hand settled on your thigh as his other moved his mouse. He opened a page from last month’s issue and kept his eyes on the screen as he kneaded your leg. “We’ll go over composition. How to draw the reader’s eye and using layout to enhance your words.”
You nodded stiffly and shakily opened your notebook. He kept his hand on your thigh as you place the book on his desk and uncapped your pen. He circled the title with his cursor, entirely unfazed by your discomfort. His fingers slipped closer to your pelvis.
“Titles are easy but you’ll want to position them according to article type as well. Is it an editorial? Review? Reflective?” He continued. “Now, most editors would leave this to marketing and such but… I try to be hands on with every aspect of my business. My seal is on every page, ever word, that goes out.”
You scribbled down a jumble of words as his hand slid between your thighs and he squeezed. You flinched and he let out a soft chuckle under his breath. You kept your wide eyes on the monitor and he carried on his lesson. His hand never quite reaching its target. He was teasing you. Asserting the new power he held over you.
When he finished his spiel, he drew away and turned his chair to face you. His legs were far apart and you tried not to look at the obvious bulge in his pants. You kept your head down as you slipped your notebook down onto your lap.
“I’ve got an important lunch date tomorrow,” He said. “I should like you to accompany me, darling.”
You peeked up at him. “Okay.”
“Sceptre Press is looking to expand its mediums. The director of Celestial has agreed to discuss a partnership.” He said coolly.
“Oh?” You breathed. “They… do podcasts?”
“Mostly,” He confirmed. “But, my dear, do wear something nice. A skirt.”
You crossed your legs. Your straight-cut pants felt thin enough. “Alright.”
“No panties.” He licked his lips. “Our little secret… well, another one, yeah?”
“Okay.” You said. You bit down and your pen rolled out of your grasp once more.
His eyes followed the pen and flicked back to you. “Well, go on,” He mused. “Very… clumsy today.”
You bent to retrieve your pen and he caught the back of your head. He held you there and rolled his chair closer so that his lap was only inches from your face. He snickered as you tried to pull away but quickly gave up. His other hand stretched over his crotch and he grasped his erection through the thin fabric of his trousers.
“I could make you do it right now,” He slithered. “Hmm?”
“Yes,” You uttered.
“I’m tempted,” He rubbed himself and shifted his hand as he pushed you closer. “Kiss it.” You closed your eyes and kissed his bulge. He shivered and let you go. You sat up, dizzy, and he grinned at you. “Not yet.” He preened. “But I do have to take care of this…” He ran his hand across his lap again. “So if you would excuse me. I am certain you have work to catch up on.”
You stood and back away slowly. “Yes, sir.” You turned as you rounded the desk.
“Sir? I like that,” He called from behind you as you neared the door. “Oh, darling, one more thing.”
You spun back to him and shielded your chest with your notebook. “Yes?”
“I’ll need some inspiration so before you sit down, go to the lav and take a nice photo for me.” He made a show of unzipping his pants behind his desk. “I bet you’re wearing a sweet little white bra, aren’t you? Maybe a precious pink number?”
Your throat tightened as you stared back at him. “Okay.” You forced out. “Is that all?”
“For now,” He shooed you away with a wave of his fingers. “As you will.”
💋
You had few skirts to choose from. You settled on a lavender one that ended just above your knees. With it, you wore a blouse with a Peter Pan collar and a grey blazer with three-quarter length sleeves. It wasn’t as enticing as any other outfit you owned; which was not at all. Perhaps that would work in your favour.
When you arrived at the bistro, Loki waved you ahead of him as you followed the hostess to your booth. You slid across the bench first and he was close behind. He took out his phone and checked it before he set it face down on the table. He asked for water and nothing else.
Your leg shook under the table nervously. He grabbed your thigh to still you. The waitress returned and he thanked her, his hand still on your leg. When she departed, his fingers slowly gathered your skirt. You reached to pull it back and he tssked.
“Our associate has informed me she’s running late.” He grinned. “About twenty minutes or so.” You squirmed as his hand slipped beneath your hem. “I think we can fill our time accordingly.”
“L--Mr. Laufeyson,” You gasped. “Someone might see.”
“They’d have to be watching us very closely,” He leaned against you as his fingers crawled along the top of your thigh. “Now,” He shoved his hand between your legs roughly. “Let’s have some fun, darling.”
You parted your legs reluctantly and he tickled along your cunt. You grabbed the edge of the table and your eyes searched frantically. The other diners were occupied with their own meals, their own company. You felt as invisible as you had back at the office. He rubbed you slowly. He lifted his glass with his other hand as he continued.
“After our meeting, I think we’ll head back to the office and call a conference. We’ll need ideas for prospective podcasts,” He swirled his fingertips and you let out a long breath between your teeth. “Of course, if this all goes to plan.”
You whimpered as you felt yourself getting wet. His fingers glided easily along your folds as he spread your arousal. You planted your elbow on the table and held your chin as you bit your lip. Mortified, you tried to hide your face.
“Uh uh,” He grabbed your wrist and shoved it down as his fingers dipped inside you. “Look at me.”
You leaned back against the booth as you looked over at him. He smirked as he moved his fingers steadily in and out of you. He pressed his palm to your clit and the sensation made your legs shake again.
“Is this what you like? Sneaking around?” He taunted. “Is this what he does, hmm? Or maybe he bends you over his desk?”
“Mr. Lauf--” You swallowed down a moan and clapped your hand over your mouth.
“I can see it in your eyes. I can feel it,” He sped up and your thighs squeezed his hand. “Are you going to cum? Here in front of everyone? In the middle of this restaurant?”
Your eyes rounded and you grabbed his shoulder pleadingly. You couldn’t speak, afraid you would cry out instead.
“You like being a naughty little girl, don’t you?” He curled his fingers and you heard a subtle squelch as your walls twitched around him.
You bared your teeth and latched onto his arm. You rocked your hips without thinking as you came. You let out a shuddery breath and he slid his fingers out of your cunt, sure to drag them along your folds. He untangled his arm from your grasp and you fell back against the seat and pushed down your skirt.
He raised his hand and ran his wet fingers over your lips. He pressed against your mouth until you opened it. He stared into your eyes as he made you suck your own cum off his knuckles. He withdrew them and used a napkin to wipe away your saliva.
“It is a pity, however, that this lunch should set you behind, darling,” He crossed his legs and drank from his water again. “You will have to stay late tonight… to catch up.”
“Yes, sir,” You ceded.
He smirked and looked around. A moment of silence before he perked up and stood. He buttoned his jacket so it hid his bulge and greeted the tall woman who approached you. He shook her hand with the same one he’d just had between your legs. You stood in kind. Your legs felt weak.
“Valerie,” He purred. “Thank you for fitting us in today.”
“Us?” She looked between you. “And sorry about the delay. Traffic was… traffic.”
“My intern,” He introduced you by name, “She’s shadowing me for the day. To get an idea of the business and all its little quirks.”
You shook her hand and you sat down as she did the same. The server was quick to appear and offer you menus. You eagerly took yours, hoping to hide behind it for the rest of the meal. Especially as that familiar and irresistible tingle nestled in your core.
#summertime sadness#kiss me in the d-a-r-k#stever rogers#Bucky Barnes#loki fic#dark steve rogers#dark bucky barnes#dark loki#steve rogers x reader#bucky barnes x reader#loki x reader#dark!steve rogers#dark!bucky barnes#dark bucky barnes x reader#dark steve rogers x reader#dark!loki#dark!bucky barnes x reader#dark!steve rogers x reader#dark!loki x reader#dark!fic#Dark Fic#Fic#au#series#Sequel#marvel#MCU#captain america
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Daddy
Wordcount: 2000
Warnings: Pregnancy. Infidelity. Murder. Reference to past abuse.
Notes: Some men take to fatherhood quite naturally. Others … do not.
The wedding is elaborate, expensive, and populated entirely by the bride’s family and friends.
Perhaps this is why no-one mentions the haste with which it has been arranged, in spite of how decisive the couple’s most recent and definitely final breakup had been only a few months ago.
Nobody comments on the irony of the bride wearing white, either.
***
It is a novelty, at first.
The matching rings are fun, and it is rather nice having someone to complain to after a long day of dealing with the world and its stupidity.
Charlie calls her Wife, and she calls him Husband. Ironically, of course.
He likes the idea of the vows. Til death do us part is pleasantly macabre, and reassuringly final.
He’ll never be alone again.
***
The other business is nothing at all, to begin with.
He enjoys the way her magnificent curves have been augmented by the twist of fate that brought them back together so permanently. Her swollen breasts and rounded belly are a gift for him to enjoy. A fitting tribute to his virility. And her fertility, he supposes.
Look at what I have done to you, he thinks, each time he fucks her. See how you have grown by me.
And she grows.
And she grows.
***
One evening as they are laying on the couch, Nicole suddenly lets out a gasp, and grabs his hand. Before he knows quite what is happening, she has pressed it to her abdomen, right below her navel. Just as he’s about to ask her if she has gone mad … he feels it. A tiny movement from within her, pressing against his palm.
Her eyes are very bright as she gazes at him, the beaming smile on her face making her look like a Stepford version of herself. “Oh, Charlie,” she says, softly. “I’ve been feeling it for weeks, and now you can too! He’s kicking. Isn’t it wonderful?”
Kicking?
He?
Wonderful?
Charlie pulls his hand away, and turns his attention back to the TV.
***
Nicole starts leaving books on the topic of baby names and parenting scattered around the house.
Charlie shakes his head at her carelessness, and tidies them away.
He wastes an entire day of good writing time on painting the spare room pastel blue under her scrutiny. Another on assembling the crib that is now the centerpiece of the room.
Every time she returns home from an outing, she brings with her some item of clothing or toy, then insists on inflicting a painfully uninteresting show-and-tell on him.
She watches him carefully at these times, like she’s waiting for him to do something. But he doesn’t know what. So he does nothing.
Eventually she stops, and simply adds her purchases to the growing pile in the spare room.
It’s a relief, quite frankly.
***
Long gone are the days of the seductive young starlet he first met, with her penchant for slutty lingerie and bodycon minidresses.
Nicole’s underwear is sensible now. Frumpy, even. She wears a stretchy band of fabric to support her belly. She waddles like a penguin, and when she sits she looks a bit like a frog.
“NO,” she protests, when he reaches for her with intent. “Charlie, I’m too big. I don’t feel attractive at all.”
When he offers to fuck her in the dark, she becomes quite irate. “You don’t think I’m beautiful?” she rages, her dramatic exit from the bedroom greatly undermined by the ungainliness of her gait.
Charlie cannot understand her reaction. She may be less alluring now, but he still has needs.
What is he supposed to do?
***
One of his supporting cast is young, and extremely eager to please.
He asks her to stay behind one evening on the pretense of giving her some notes on her performance. He fucks her on the prop couch in the center of the rehearsal space, imagining that there is an entire audience watching them. Imagining that Nicole is watching.
Then he gives the girl some feedback on her lackluster performance, and she cries until he makes her stop.
It’s a shame, really, he thinks as he disposes of her. But these minor roles are relatively easy to recast, so no harm done.
When he gets home a couple of hours later than normal, Nicole is already sound asleep, facing away from his side of the bed.
He lays down next to her on top of the covers, and watches every minute on the illuminated display of the clock tick by slowly until dawn.
***
One morning, Nicole hands him a list of five names and tells him to fucking pick one for the stranger who roils so violently within her belly these days that it makes him feel quite sick to watch.
After some deliberation, he makes his choice.
Henry.
***
“Why don’t you talk to him?”
It’s the middle of the night. Charlie hadn’t realized he wasn’t the only one awake. “I beg your pardon?”
“You’ve never once tried to talk to Henry. How can you expect to bond with him if he doesn’t even know his Daddy’s voice?”
Bond?
Daddy?
He runs his fingers through his hair. “What do you want me to say?”
It’s a genuine question, but Nicole takes it as a personal affront. She lets out a hiss like an angry cat, then turns over and shifts around for an interminably long time before her breathing finally evens out and she begins to snore.
Very slowly, so as not to wake her, Charlie rolls over, and inches down the bed until his face is level with her middle. The skin ripples, letting him know that the inhabitant of his wife’s body is awake.
He chews on the inside of his lip, and clears his throat several times. “Hello, Henry,” he whispers, after a long pause. Almost immediately, a wave of embarrassment engulfs him, even though nobody else is watching. This is stupid.
But for a moment, he thinks he sees the outline of a little hand, pressing against the taut skin as though it’s reaching out to him ... and then it’s gone.
It must have been a trick of the light.
***
Henry Barber is born at 3:30 a.m. on a Tuesday.
He weighs nine pounds three ounces.
Nicole cries happy tears when they lay him on her still-swollen belly.
Charlie stares at the small, red-faced, screaming creature, and feels nothing.
***
Home is no longer a sanctuary.
The baby cries.
Nicole cries.
Charlie comes and goes as he pleases.
He is exhausted, and he is numb.
***
“Where the fuck have you been?”
“Out.”
“Out where?”
“Just out. Walking. Thinking.”
(He picked up a hooker in Brooklyn. Left part of her in Manhattan, and the rest of her in The Bronx.)
“You can’t keep doing this, Charlie. I need you. Henry needs you.”
“What do you need?”
“…”
“WHAT DO YOU NEED?”
***
Henry is a few days shy of being one month old when Nicole walks into Charlie’s study one night. He’s been trying to write – he has been on the verge of feeling inspired for days now – but the screen in front of him is thus far stubbornly blank, the blinking cursor taunting him. And then Nicole is there, looking like a ghost in her nightgown, face pale and blotchy, with dark circles under her eyes.
“I need you to take him,” she says, quietly. Her voice is eerily calm, where usually it is filled with too much emotion. “He is full. His diaper has been changed. You don’t need to do anything. Just … take him for a minute.”
Charlie nods.
“You have to support his head,” she reminds him, as she transfers Henry into his arms. Charlie wants to say I know, but in truth he doesn’t know anything. He hasn’t held him before; not even at the hospital.
Nicole backs slowly out of the room, and shuts the door behind her very quietly. Almost immediately, Charlie hears a strangled sob, and then the sound of their bedroom door slamming shut.
The loud noise makes Henry jump, and he starts to wail. Straight away, Charlie’s head begins to hurt.
As the crying goes on and on, Charlie is reminded of something his mother once told him. About how much he’d cried as a baby, just to inconvenience her. About how angry it had made his father.
Charlie doesn’t feel angry at all. Just worried. Henry’s face is bright red, and his little hands are balled up into fists. He is going to make himself sick if he carries on like this.
“What do you want?” Charlie asks him, even though he knows it is completely futile. The situation is hopeless. He is trapped in this apartment with a wife who won’t tell him what she needs, and a baby who can’t.
Perhaps it is just wishful thinking, but Charlie notices that the baby’s cries seem to grow a little quieter after he speaks. Does Henry want him to talk to him?
“Your crying is quite understandable,” Charlie tells him, in a conversational tone. “The world is a dreadful place, filled with terrible people. It is quite incomprehensible even to me, so I can’t begin to fathom how terrifying it must be for someone so small and so new.”
It isn’t his imagination. The crying is definitely getting fainter, and the indignant fists have started to uncurl. Fat tears glisten on Henry’s long, dark lashes, but he isn’t producing any more. Now, he just seems to be making a noise for the sake of it.
“You appear to have a penchant for the dramatic,” Charlie observes. “Perhaps we have more in common than our shared fondness for Nicole’s breasts.”
Henry sneezes, and stops crying completely.
“Good boy,” says Charlie.
When Nicole returns some time later and whisks him away without saying anything, Charlie’s arms feel strangely empty.
***
At four o’clock the next morning, Charlie closes his laptop. After the earlier interruption, the words had flowed better than they had in months.
He is on his way to bed when a little noise from down the hallway catches his attention, and he finds himself drawn into Henry’s room. When he peers down into the crib, he sees Henry gazing up at him, looking alarmingly awake given the lateness of the hour.
“You should be asleep,” Charlie points out.
In response, Henry lets out a little coo.
“You are right, of course,” Charlie agrees. “I should also be asleep.” He pulls up the chair that Nicole sometimes sits on when she is feeding the baby, and sinks down on it. “Perhaps I will keep you company for a while.”
When Henry begins to fuss a short while later, Charlie doesn’t hesitate before reaching over to pick him up. This time, he holds him against his chest, like he’s seen Nicole do. He rubs his back gently, marveling as he does so how his hand seems to cover most of the little boy. “There there,” he murmurs. “I’ve got you.”
Just as he had earlier, Henry gradually quietens down, and eventually drifts off to sleep in Charlie’s arms.
Charlie stares at Henry’s peaceful face as he holds him, suddenly feeling quite sick with remorse at his behavior so far. “I’m so sorry,” he whispers. “I have been quite remiss, haven’t I?” He strokes his son’s head, admiring how soft and fine his hair is. “I must confess I do not know what I am doing. But you seem rather determined to teach me, so I promise I shall endeavor to learn as quickly as possible.”
Henry stirs, and whimpers in his sleep. A shadow passes across his perfect little face. Charlie’s heart clenches, as though a fist has curled around it.
For as long as he can remember, there has been a scar on the back of Charlie’s head. He once asked his mother about it when he was young, and she told him he’d fallen down when he was a baby. He didn’t believe her even then.
Charlie chews on the inside of his lip, and thinks.
Nobody ever held him when he cried, so one day he just stopped. His terrible nightmares were caused by the ones who were meant to soothe them. He has no happy memories of his childhood.
But ... it doesn’t have to be that way for Henry. It won’t be. Charlie might not know how to be a father, but he knows how not to be one.
He squeezes his burning eyes tightly shut. His lips are trembling as he presses a gentle kiss to his son’s forehead. “It’s okay, Henry,” he whispers fiercely. “You are safe. Nothing’s going to harm you.”
Daddy’s here.
#charlie writes#family man charlie#tw: pregnancy#tw: infidelity#tw: murder#tw: reference to past abuse
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IXD303 - Project Stages/Reflection
For my IXD303 digital project prototype, I decided to create a VR app for elderly people in care homes. At the beginning, I was thinking about creating an COVID app for teenagers and adults, that they could get an idea as to how long we have been in lockdown and a final countdown until the end of isolation, to give the person a goal to strive for and a moment in time to look forward to. And within this app, they could record their daily habits and routines, to keep them busy during lockdown.
However, I had to scrap this idea because, when I was in groups with my peers, we all agreed to study elderly people in cares homes as our intended audience. This gave me the opportunity to use VR. The reason for this was because, I myself are a fan of VR and I’m really interested in how it works and is created. Furthermore, nobody else seemed to be going down this route, which would add to the uniqueness of the project.
Research and Sketching
Research
The first thing I began doing once I decided to do VR, was to begin researching VR as a whole and for elderly people in particular, with and without disabilities. (I talked about my findings in a different blog post.) In the end, I decided my target audience wasn’t limited to one small group of elderly people, like the examples I researched, which was VR and dementia. This idea to design just for people with dementia was already taken. So, I decided to make mine for all elderly people, of course people who are unable to see (blind) or have any other limitations that they can’t use a headset, would be ruled out of this.
Nevertheless, I wanted to create a meditative app with the sole purpose of targeting elderly peoples mental health and helping them to feel stress-free from all the horrors and fears of the affects of COVID19, especially in care homes that was hit badly than nearly any other institution. I couldn’t imagine the fear, stress and death elderly people in these care homes were experiencing. So to take their minds off this, I wanted to create this app. Once, I knew what was required of me, I began looking at possible VR apps to take influence from.
I found apps such as “relax VR”, which is a meditative app that people can use to do yoga or simply relax. This really helped with the foundation of my app. It had some great features to take influence from. I even watched a full 15min review on YouTube of the app, just to see what it was like to navigate it. Immediately after this, I started thinking of names to call my project. With situations like these, I find it quite difficult to think of a name there and then. In my experience, I have to go about my daily business and think about a name then, in my spare time. I did exactly this and I came up with a few names.
I was mindful not to spend too much time on this task, as a name can always be changed later on if not suited. You can see from the names above that they are quite similar in one way, being that they are other words for a paradise or a happy place. e.g. oasis and tropic. They are used to describe a beautiful paradise almost. Anyway, in the end I settled for Nova, named after a supernova which when researched it is described that a supernova (if were seen with the naked eye) is one or if not the most beautiful and extraordinary thing you will ever witness. Which is quite related to my app, as it involves looking at 360 degree images of the beautiful views this world has to offer. Hence why I named it Nova.
Sketching the Logo
With regards to the logo, I again took influence from relax VR’s logo. I really liked the simplicity of it and the fact it was all low case as well, made it appealing and relaxing to look at. So I then began brainstorming a few ideas on paper.
I liked having the idea of the app logo relate to outer space, after its name, as you can see in the sketches. But then I realised that the app isn’t about outer space, its about relaxing and mediating. So I scrapped the idea of using this design. Still, it was good to have done. In the end, I received feedback from my tutor stating that with this digital product, there is no need to create a logo or a fancy looking visual marque. Just to have it in a sans-serif font. So taking onboard this feedback, I did just that. And I concluded with this design:
Early Designs for Name and Logo
But nevertheless, here is a few designs I made for possible visual marques and a logo before I was told to keep it simple. These were my previous ideas:
With regards to the slogan, I seen examples on Google that stated “Turning your dreams into reality”. I thought this was a very nice slogan and very relevant to my project. So I decided to change this around a bit and settle for, “Where Dreams Become Reality”. This would give the app a bit more professionality.
Sketching the App
Not long after this, I started sketching out some possible layouts for the application. Keeping in mind that I am designing for elderly people, I was aware to keep the navigation buttons large and the amount of content minimal. So began sketching. Below you can see my first drawing:
Main Page and Music Page
Location Page
Settings Page
As you can see I kept the buttons pretty large and easy to read. I wanted to include a music page were the elderly person, with the assist of a carer, is able to change the background song for when they are navigating through the app. I took influence from an app called Jaunt VR which is also a full immersive app, that allows you see different settings, whether it be up on stage with Paul McCartney or base jumping off a cliff. I copied the layout and the design of the boxes and settings, as seen below.
Sketch 2
I then created a second sketch to see if I can make the design more straightforward and easier to understand. I thought the settings and music page were quite alright, so not much changes were needed to that.
These sketches depicted how the app was going to be navigated. There is a button for the city, one for beach and one for forests. This was the design I wanted to follow. I had to be sure to get the dimensions right also. In order for the person to access the link/next page, they simply have to move the cursor which is lined with and built into the headset, to the particular button they want to access for 3 seconds. This will then lead the user to that page.
Buttons
With regards to the buttons, I originally took influence from relax VR again. Within that app the navigating buttons are rounded and appear to be like a large translucent bubbles.
I thought this was a really cool design and I loved how the buttons looked like balls of water that animated too. And as water is a great mediator and gives off a calming feel, this was a good move. So the next stage, before I began making the app, was to create the buttons on Illustrator. I created three drafts of buttons in total.
These were my first designs for the buttons:
This is only a small snippet of the buttons I created. At the beginning, I liked this design for the buttons. I wanted to include the colours, blue, green and white, as they were found to be relaxing colours and most associated with mediation. The font however, came to be less appealing when added to an image. So, I turned for help from my tutor and again I received great feedback on what I should do instead, which was to leave it as a san-serif also.
I once again took onboard this feedback and changed the buttons immediately. I research fonts to use and I came across the font that is used in Spotify. I am a user of Spotify and I really like their font. It really suits being in an app. So I decided to use this. Which resulted in me creating this:
This immediately looked better. The font really stuck out more professionally. But that wasn’t the last time I edited my buttons. As the time went past, I noticed that the buttons needed something else to help draw out the background. And this was when I came up with the idea of creating vector icons on Illustrator to add to the buttons. Of course, that meant that I had to make them square, but this however suited better for my Glitch work (see glitch blog post). I simply found small vector images and traced over them in Illustrator and pasted them in my buttons. These were the final design for my project.
An example of what they looked like:
The background colour appears darker in the actual project. In Tumblr it is showing it as a very light blue. Anyway, these buttons I loved. It is mad how a bit of icons and shapes can give an image a bit of life. To see the rest of the buttons, access the link to my work which can be found on my other blog post.
In conclusion, I am quite happy with the work I completed in XD for my digital product. I decided to cut the length of the app down a bit as it was totalling to 65 pages, which was quite a lot and overwhelming. To do this, I only created pages for: Forests, Beaches, Cities and Night Sky. My original design included hotels and piers. In the end, I thought this was a good move. Nevertheless, I did the best I could to minimalize the app and make it as straightforward as I possibly could. I have learnt that creating a VR app is quite time consuming and involves a lot of planning and research. An example would be, collecting a variety of 360 degree images on the internet. This was very time consuming as there is very little amounts of free 360 images. Many of them are repetitive and share the same location, which I don’t want.
If I had more time to learn about VR and was able to redo the project again, I would probably attempt to create the app as an actual VR project on the likes of A-frame or Unity 3D. I think the ability to create a full-blown VR website from scratch would be an unbelievable achievement. Which leads me to the question, what do I wish I learnt before doing this project? And again it would be, that I wish I learnt in depth what it takes to create a real VR app. However, this is always something I could learn for for the next time I decide to create a VR app or website.
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I thought I’d share some of the anonymous messages I’ve gotten over the last 24 hours about different nominations to clear the air for those who seem to be under the impression that I’m being excessively unfair by refusing to reply to a simple question about how a nomination made it into this year’s BFWA.
First of all, if these are what you consider to be simple inquiries and polite questions, we might need to step away from the topic of fanfiction and maybe talk about manners and how to address others.
As for how I “let this fic be nominated”, the nominations are not up to me. I don’t decide who makes it in and who doesn’t. You do. The fans do. I just process the information and let you vote on it. If it “happens to feature Bellarke”, then that makes it a Bellarke fic. By whose standards? Yours. The people who nominated it, and the people who gave it enough votes to get past the first round. If your opinion was so widespread, then I doubt the fic would have made the top 12, so it seems like you might be alone in your criticism. Your persistent anonymous messages won’t change that. BFWA works because it’s impartial. My opinions don’t change the outcome, and neither will yours.
As a Bellarke, you might not want to see someone rewarded in this fanfic contest, but as an organizer, I will not see your bratty behavior rewarded in my contest.
As for letting a lot of people down, I don’t think I have. Over 400 nominations were received this year, 400 works and people recognized. This event is for them. It’s to thank them for the content they created and to show our support to encourage them to produce more. Do you know what I think would have let a lot of people down? If I’d let Bellarke Fanfic Awards die in 2017 like it was supposed to. Then 1,000 people, fics, and other fan works would never have been shared or recognized. I think that might have been a little more disappointing.
But I have always been open to constructive feedback, and because this seems to be something that has profoundly impacted certain of you, I have made a few decisions to hopefully rectify the situation.
First, the Mutual Pining category will be removed from this year’s BFWA. If the nomination in question was so out of place, it could have easily been fairly eliminated in the next rounds. However, you will not force me to outcast a writer and dictate how I run these awards, so please take a moment to go apologize to your faves and explain to them that because you were so deeply impacted by the thought that they’d lose to a fic you felt didn’t belong, you’re now single-handedly made sure that your faves can’t win at all.
Second, all other categories featuring the fic after Round 1 will also be eliminated from the running to prevent you from spam voting in an effort to eliminate certain fics. Go apologize to those authors, too.
Third, as a preventative measure, in order to protect you from any such events in the future, I’ve added a new feature to this blog that I encourage you to take advantage of. If you head to our blog and move your cursor to the top right corner, you’ll find a new button labeled “unfollow”. Please feel free to use this feature liberally. If the thought of crossing one of our posts anywhere else during your time on Tumblr continues to worry you, you can also select the new “block” feature, that will prevent you from seeing any other disturbing content on this blog.
I hope you’ll be able to sleep well now that you know something has been done about this very troubling situation. And to the authors, I apologize that the voice of the few spoiled the opinions of the many. You’re all winners to me, to your readers, and to this fandom.
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Fic: This isn’t a rom-com 7/?
Author’s notes: So this one is a little longer than usual, but not by much. Lot’s of stuff happening and I’d love feedback about the direction I’m taking this. I’m always open to suggestions!
Wordcount: 3524
Warnings: one F. bomb, but other than that, lots and lots of fluff.
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6
Lilah was supposed finishing her breakfast and getting ready to go to work, but instead, she was browsing the New York Film Academy page, especially the Master of Arts in screenwriting and its admission application.
She didn’t even know why she was doing it. It wasn’t like Lilah was actually considering applying for it. She already had a master’s degree. Not only that, she already had a career that she spent the last ten years of her life investing in. This was just a stupid pipe dream and nothing more.
“Morning”, Isaac’s voice started Lilah out of her thoughts, and she hurried to close her laptop lid and turn to watch as he padded into the kitchen and poured himself some coffee, still on his PJs.
“Morning. Shouldn’t you be getting ready for work?” Usually, Isaac worked from 8 to five or later whenever needed.
“We had some night shooting yesterday and it wrapped up around six,” he replied yawning and dropping on the chair in front of her, cradling his mug. “I’ve just gotten back and I’m planning on sleeping all morning.”
“Jesus! That’s some horrible hours,” Lilah commented with a wince and Isaac just nodded.
“And I’m one of the lucky ones because all the runners take turns helping out while the others take a nap. I don’t know how Keanu does it. The guy is a machine. But this was my last day anyway.”
“Wait, what?” Lilah asked surprised. “You quitted?”
“Yeah. It was good money, but it was getting in the way of rehearsals, both theater, and band.”
“Band? What band?” Lilah looked at him confused. Why didn’t she know about this?
“Oh right! You didn’t come to my last gig,” Isaac said and there wasn’t any accusation on his tone, but Lilah still felt bad. She had been with Keanu last weekend and missed his performance. “These guys liked my vocals and asked me if I was interested in joining their band. I said yes.”
“But what about musical theater and the Hollywood dream?” she asked, her eyes wide. How come she missed such a change in her friend’s life? Isaac just shrugged.
“I’m still doing theater, but you know I love to be on the stage too and these guys have a great sound,” he said draining his mug and picking up Lilah’s breakfast dishes to bring to the kitchen. “And I can still take on Hollywood in a different way. But to do that, I need time to rehearsal. So as of Monday, you’re looking at the newest barista for Novelsy.”
Lilah was at a loss of words faced with so many changes in Isaac’s life in such a short period of time. She was being a lousy friend, focusing too much on her own issues and missing Isaac’s and Jean’s lives.
“Oh. I know that look,” he said with a frown. “It’s the ‘I’m having a freak out’ look. What’s going on in that pretty little head of yours?” Isaac asked, tapping her temple gently.
“I just…” Lilah sighed. “I can’t believe I ended up missing so much in these last few weeks. I’m sorry.”
“Well, you have been a little self-absorbed lately,” Isaac pointed out with a small grimace. “But I get it. It’s the thrill of new love and all that.”
It was weird how Isaac’s words managed to be exactly right, but the truth behind them still took her by surprise. Because no matter how hard Lilah tried to fight it or pretend otherwise, she was in love with Keanu. Had been for a while now and it was both exhilarating and terrifying.
“Oh honey,” Isaac sighed, catching her wide-eyed gaze. “You’re one of the smartest people I know, but when it comes to your own feelings…”
And could she really argue with that? It was staring her in the face this whole time and Lilah didn’t see it. Well, no, that wasn’t quite right, was it? She refused to see it because she was afraid. Afraid of what it could be and where it would lead and how it would end.
And this was so no what Lilah signed up for when started this thing with Keanu. Or at least that’s what she kept telling herself. She kept repeating that he was her friend and that was all but none of her friendships ever felt like this. And to be fair, considering how sweet, humble, caring, intelligent and amazing Keanu was, did she even stand a chance of not falling in love?
“Are we having a meltdown at this time in the morning?” Jean asked in a yawn and filling a cup of coffee for herself.
“The penny finally dropped on the Keanu thing,” Isaac informed.
“Thank fuck! The oblivious thing was cute at the beginning, but it was starting to get annoying,” Jean said, her harsh words shaking Lilah from her daze. “Also, not fun to get kicked off my own place so you could have your little ‘not a date’ with Keanu.”
“I never kicked you out of the apartment!” Lilah complained, glaring at her friend and Jean rolled her eyes.
“Right. Because I wanna be here when you two are making heart eyes at each other. No, thank you.”
“Jean!” Isaac chided cutting her off. “There were a dozen ways you could’ve said that without coming off like a bitch.”
From the corner of her eye, Lilah saw Jean cross her arms over her chest, her lips pulling in a thin line of displeasure. She hated to be called out over her bluntness.
“But even though she could have phrased better,” Isaac continued, looking over at Lilah. “Keanu has been coming over a lot. Not that I mind, but it does take away some of our privacy, you know?”
Lilah sighed and nodded. He had a point. They both did. Lilah never thought she would be one of those people that ditched her friends the second they started dating. Not that she was dating Keanu but…
“I’m sorry. I’ve been a shitty friend.”
“A little bit,” Jean agreed, but Lilah could see she was fighting a smile. “But we still love you.”
“We do,” Isaac agreed with a grin. “And you can start making up for the lost time by coming to my band’s gig this Friday night.”
“I wouldn’t miss it for the world,” Lilah assured, kissing his cheek. “Now get your ass in bed! You look exhausted.”
Isaac nodded and waved at them both, before disappearing into his bedroom. Lilah hesitated for a moment, before glancing at Jean, who was inconspicuously avoiding looking her way.
“Are we ok?” Lilah asked and Jean nodded with a sigh.
“I missed my friend, you know? I missed talking to you, knowing what was going on in your life and sharing mine.”
“I’ve missed you too,” she said, dragging Jean for a hug. “How about tomorrow, after my class, you and I get some retail therapy? Novelsy’s costume contest is next week after all.”
“A girl after my own heart,” Jean joked with a grin. “It’s a date.”
“Alright,” Lilah replied with a chuckle as she got up and head to her own bedroom.
She went to turn off her laptop, Lilah was confronted once more with the New York Film Academy page, which made her pause. When she told Keanu how she considered going to film school as a teenager, Lilah didn’t give him the full picture.
The idea of being a writer, creating stories and universes, especially movies, had always been a dream. She remembered reading The Lord of the Rings for the first time and having that mix of fascination and jealousy of Tolkien for being able to create such a fantastic, magical universe that entertained so many people. Lilah wanted to do that too. Leave a mark in the world, tell a story, make people laugh and cry and love that thing she created.
But Lilah also remembered how her father reacted when she said she wanted to apply for film school. He had actually laughed because he thought she was joking. She knew he didn’t do it to hurt her. He was looking out for her, wanting her to be practical about her future.
What were the odds of Lilah making it in that industry? One in a million considering that she was a woman of color? Considering that it wasn’t all depending on hard work? Was she even good enough to begin with? Well, there was one quick way to find out.
Her eyes shifted back to the computer and Lilah took a seat, browsing her archives. Writing samples were required for submission, a fictional piece and a non-fictional.
She could use one of the reviews she wrote for Novelsy’s blog as a non-fiction sample. Lilah had gotten positive feedback from those. The fiction piece would give her a bit more trouble and after some more searching, Lilah decided on a fantasy story she wrote during college.
Lilah would need to work out a few kinks, but she really liked that one, so she put on her headphones blasting some of her favorite music as the story poured out of her, her fingers flying over the keyboard in a way she never managed to do whenever she was writing her dissertation.
By the end of the morning, Lilah had close to five thousand words written and any thought prepping her class for tomorrow slip her mind, but Lilah didn’t feel guilty at all. There was only excitement as she proofread her material.
After she annexed the documents, Lilah rechecked the application form, hesitating over the campus options. For a second, the cursor hovered over the LA option, before she selected the NY campus and submitted everything.
Lilah must be crazy for even considering LA. Even if for brief seconds. Her life was in New York. LA had nothing to offer her. Which was a lie, she knew, but fortunately, it was one easy to ignore.
Once that was taken care of, Lilah started to get ready to go to NYU. She had some data she needed to run through the analysis software and Lilah could only do it on campus. She was halfway through getting dressed when her phone rang, the screen showing Keanu’s name and selfie with the puppy beagle.
“Hey,” she greeted as how could Lilah have missed being in love with him for this long when just a phone call from him could brighten up her whole day? “How was filming last night?”
“It was good. Tiring, but good. Basil gave us the night off since we’re managing to keep up with the schedule,” Keanu replied, and Lilah could actually picture his proud smile. “I was thinking we could do something. Since I cut off our movie night short yesterday.”
“We don’t have to,” she said, reminded of Isaac’s comment earlier. “You must be exhausted.”
“A little bit, but…” he paused for a moment. “I want to see you.”
His voice was soft barely a whisper and it almost felt a little like a confession and it set the butterflies loose in her belly and she smiled.
“Well, we could watch something, get some pizza…”
“That sounds great. I’ll drop by later?”
“Sure, but promise to get some rest first?”
“I’m in bed right now. Don’t worry.”
And Lilah couldn’t help but conjure a picture of Keanu shirtless in bed, dark hair splayed over the pillow and hooded eyes. Her breath caught in her throat.
“Good,” she croaked as she tried recomposing herself. “Sleep well.”
It wasn’t until she hung up that Lilah realized what she had just done and winced. She was such a terrible friend, but now it was too late. She knew Isaac wouldn’t mind. He would be out rehearsing anyway, but Jean…
Lilah stepped out of the room, finding Jean cleaning the breakfast dishes. She hesitated by the counter, drumming her fingers on the top and Jean heaved a sigh.
“What did you do?” she asked, turning around, hands on her hips.
“I might have invited Keanu over,” Lilah replied with a grimace and Jean rolled her eyes. “Sorry!”
“Fine! But only because I have to do inventory anyway.” Lilah let out a happy squeal and squeezed Jean in a hug. “And you’re helping me with the Halloween contest! It was your idea after all.”
“I promise! Thank you!”
Lilah said her goodbyes to Jean and headed out, doing her best to push thoughts on Keanu and her brand-new revelation aside while she worked, managing to be somewhat successful until she got back home to find Keanu, browsing through her bookcase, dressing in a fitted jeans and a t-shirt so tight it seemed to be struggling to contain his biceps.
“Hi,” she greeted, and Keanu flashing her a warm smile.
“Hi. Isaac let me in. That’s ok, right?”
“Of course. I’ll be right with you. I’m just gonna take just a quick shower.”
“Sure.”
Lilah dropped her things in her bedroom and hurried to the bathroom that she shared with Isaac. There was only one suite in the apartment and Jean claimed it since the place was hers after all.
She went through her usual shower routine, but it wasn’t until Lilah was drying herself that she realized she didn’t bring any clothes with her. Lilah was just so used to shower and then go back to her room to change it kind of became a habit.
If it was Isaac or Jean outside, Lilah wouldn’t even hesitate to step out, but it wasn’t them. It was Keanu and she would have to walk past him to go back to her room.
There was nothing else she could do at this point, so with a deep breath, Lilah pulled the towel tighter against her body, making sure that there wasn’t anything showing before she walked out, refusing to look his way. She did, however, hear his sharp intake of breath disguised as a cough.
Once she was safe inside her room Lilah leaned against the door and let out a sigh. She just paraded in a towel in front of Keanu! Shit! Did he look? She wondered for a second but shook herself out of it. That would lead her nowhere. Instead, she focused on getting dressed, coming back to the living room to find Keanu on the phone. He gave her an apologetic smile as his attention returned to the call.
“My publicist. Sorry about that,” Keanu said, hanging up. “But I’m all yours now.” Lilah couldn’t help her wide grin at the way Keanu took a second to realize what he said and cursed under his breath. “I didn’t mean…”
“I know,” she chuckled. “It’s nice to be on the other side of those for a change.”
Keanu chuckled too, rubbing his nape in embarrassment and part of Lilah want to reach for him, pull him in a hug and a kiss, but that was a very dangerous line of thought so instead, she picked up the pizza menu.
“So, I have a very important thing to ask you,” she started with a somber voice. “It might define if this,” she gestured between them. “Will continue any further.”
“I’m already nervous,” he quipped, turning to look at her better.
“How do you feel about pineapple on pizza?” She inquired and Keanu shook his head in disbelief as he chuckled. “Oh, I’m serious. There is a right answer to this.”
“I don’t like it?” he replied with a hesitant smile and Lilah gaped at him in exaggerated horror
“And you call yourself Hawaiian!” she teased, clicking her tongue in disappointment and making Keanu laugh.
“You do know that Hawaiian pizza isn’t really Hawaiian, right?” He commented and she rolled her eyes.
“Fake Canadian then,” she shot back, sticking her tongue out at him and Keanu snorted in amusement. “Pepperoni?”
“Sure,” he agreed. Lilah called in their order before joining Keanu on the couch.
“So you’re going to Japan?” she asked curiously.
“Yeah. 47 Ronin’s premiere,” Keanu explained, and Lilah just hummed, avoiding his eyes. “What?”
“I didn’t say anything.”
“You have a very expressive face, Bennett,” he said, and Lilah laughed.
“I don’t want to judge a movie based only on a trailer,” she started hesitantly.
“But you didn’t like it,” he completed with a chuckle.
“It’s not that I didn’t like it, I just… Let’s just say Hollywood doesn’t exactly have a great track record on portraying other cultures.”
“You have a point,” Keanu relented, and Lilah was glad to see he didn’t seem upset with her comment. “We did our best to show respect for Japanese culture and the legend, though.”
“I’m sure you did. This is ok, right? Talking about your movies?”
“It’s fine. I like talking about what I do,” he assured, and she grinned.
“So, I can ask about John Wick? Because I still don’t know what’s about even though I’m technically in it?”
Keanu chuckled and quickly explained the general plot for the movie, hands waving around excitedly as he described the entire process behind getting the movie greenlighted and getting his friends Chad and David involved.
Lilah could tell not only how much Keanu loved what he did by the way he was smiling, by the eagerness in his voice, but she could also see that this wasn’t any movie for him. She hung onto every word of his, chin on her head and her chest felt about to burst at the overwhelming affection Lilah felt for him.
After a moment, Keanu fell silent and he once again did that ducked head, hand covering the mouth chuckle that Lilah learned to associate to him being shy or embarrassed about something.
And maybe he saw it in her eyes, so she quickly looked away. The last thing Lilah needed was Keanu catching on to her feelings and making everything awkward between them. She had come to enjoy their time together too much.
It was a bit of a relief when the pizza finally arrived because it gave them something else to focus on, beside themselves.
“You can try the Hawaiian if you want,” she offered after they moved to the couch to eat, a random movie playing on the TV just for noise. “I’m the only one who likes it in this house.”
“I’m good.”
“Are you sure? It’s really good,” she said in a sing-song voice and Keanu snorted.
“You’re gonna annoy me into trying, aren’t you?” He asked with a sigh that really wasn’t annoyed at all. Lilah just nodded with a grin. “Fine. Give it here.”
Lilah didn’t know why she didn’t just hand him the slice. Instead, she moved closer and lifted it in front of him. Keanu hesitated briefly before he took a bite, lips brushing against her fingers as he did it. It sent shivers down her spine because Lilah hadn’t expected it to feel this intimate.
“And?” she asked, clearing her throat.
“It was better than I was expecting,” Keanu admitted sipping his beer and Lilah grinned. Small victories.
She brought the slice back to herself, but before she could take a bite, Keanu leaned forward and stole the last bit. The movement brought him so close his beard actually brushed again her cheek.
“Hey!” Lilah protested as he grinned smugly.
“You’re the one that wanted me to try it,” he pointed out, bumping his shoulder against hers. Lilah shook her head and picked up another slice, trying to hide her pleased grin.
They talked for a while longer, completely ignoring the TV. It was fun and comfortable, and Lilah knew she could probably spend the entire night like that, but it was getting late and she knew Keanu had to work tomorrow and so did she.
“I think we should call it a night,” she said, turning off the TV.
“We didn’t watch anything,” he pointed out and Lilah shrugged.
“It was still fun. I like just talking to you.”
“Yeah, me too,” Keanu replied, his lips tugging on a smile as he helped her clean up.
“So, Novelsy’s hosting its first costume contest next week. Afterward, Isaac’s theater group is reenacting Rocky Horror Picture Show in this bar. It’s basically a bunch of drunk people singing along to the songs, trying to remember their lines and failing miserably. It’s really fun, do you wanna come?”
“Sure,” Keanu agreed, and Lilah could see the doubt in his eyes, that was quickly replaced with a curious smile. “Are you gonna be in costume?”
“Definitely,” she replied, as she looked at him under her lashes. “Gotta be there to know what it is though.”
“Then I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”
There was something in the way that Keanu said it, the way he was looking at her that just stole her breath, making her heart thunder in her chest and there was no way to see this as anything other than flirting.
“See you on Thursday, then,” she said, standing up to press a kiss on his cheek. She barely missed his lips and she really hoped Keanu noticed it was on purpose.
(tbc)
Go to part 8
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#keanu reeves#keanu reeves fanfic#keanu reeves imagine#keanu reeves x ofc#keanu reeves x original character#fanfic#this isn't a rom-com#series#original character
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The C&Me Report: Dispatch # 1
Author’s Forward
This is a work of friction, the turbid spew of a diseased imagination. The characters, events, location, time of day, and yes even the fucking weather are all made up - except when they aren’t.
That the submissive in the story maybe resembles someone in my past life is a bizarre coincidence that you shouldn’t read anything into. The rumor that I may have based the - selfish? disgusting? can we settle on sick? - narrator on myself is an unfortunate misunderstanding. I am a considerate, thoughtful, kind, compassionate, altruistic, gentle, empathetic, loving soul - and I swear the wrath of a banshee working off a seven day drunk upon anyone who says different.
I hope you enjoy what I think is a novel approach to the old in-out. For those of you who prefer a more traditional 3-step narrative of the form:
boy meets girl (or whatever gender permutation gets you going)
one paragraph (preferably less)
boy fucks girl
this just ain’t gonna work for you. Seriously. But, if you choose to ignore this warning, for fuck’s sake don’t whine about it afterwards.
One final note: if you do make it to the end, and your cursor is a short click away from registering one star, you should know that the banshee gets pissed off rather easily these days - just sayin’.
Happy trails.
Roc Daimonas
Sep. 2020
* * *
I have an ethical dilemma that I’m hoping that you can help me with.
Whether you come at it from a moral or legal perspective, these days non-consensual sex is kind of frowned upon. The MeTooers are clear: she has to freely say “yes”. Sounds easy, but sometimes Easy Street is paved with potholes.
Let’s start with the seemingly obvious: “yes” doesn’t get you off the hook if you mention that you’ve got proof that could have her swinging in Sing Sing. Nor, for that matter, any persuasive argument that includes an “or else I will … “ clause. But what if it’s “or else I won’t”?
For example, you have front row tickets to the hot show that she’s dying to see. Without a promise of action for afters, you won’t take her. “Maybe (fill in her best friend’s name) is interested…?” I think we might need a new category, “technically consensual but the guy’s a douchebag”.
Also obviously, if she’s drunk, her “yes” doesn’t mean shit. But what if she’s sober, in fact hasn’t had a drink all day. And she needs one, badly, sort of the way that after holding your breath for two minutes you need air, because she’s an alcoholic. Sadly she’s broke, has nothing left to pawn, and has already been to the Plasma Donation Center twice this week. Let’s say she loves bubbly and you have a bottle of White Star on ice.
If, under those circumstances, you tell her, “no nookie no party”, you know damn well that you’re going to get laid. (Pro tip: one glass, then sex, and only then finish the bottle). You can get all moral on me, but she’s gonna do what it takes to get a drink, and if that’s by blowing somebody in the liquor store’s parking lot, oh well. I’m thinking why not me, instead of some jerk who’s gonna sub a store-brand asti?
Seriously, I’m looking for feedback, let me know what you think.
BTW, I wouldn’t trade sex for a drink, I’m not that kind of asshole, and this isn’t that kind of story. Rather, it’s actually cannabis that she wants, and I’m much worse of an asshole. You see, I’m a sex addict, sub-category control freak, and I’ve been waiting patiently for a long time.
* * *
C called, Lydia was dead. Apparently she passed out and knocked her 151 into a candle. I hadn’t heard anything from C, hence nothing about Lydia, for about five years, but this seems less like news than the fulfillment of the inevitable. Though on second thought, that she made it that long is impressive.
When she called, she was upset. Not because they were friends - nobody was friends with Lydia, she saw life as 100% transactional. No, C was upset because she was on her way to score reefer, “and I’d already given her my last $60” … could I help her?
“Sure no problem”, I told her, answered by a huge sigh of relief. “I’ve got that much cash in my wallet, come by and get it - and don’t worry about paying me back”.
Oops. Not exactly what she was fishing for. “Ah, do you have any weed that I could have?”
Long. Fucking. Silence. It’s been five years since I’d talked to her last, the day we broke up over - surprise! - her drug and alcohol problem.
“Uh, Roc…”
“Let’s do this: come over for the $60. Let’s at least get you covered on that, then you can score somewhere else. I’ll think about the other”.
A little while later she’s on my sofa, smoking a pipe. I have the cash and a small container in front of me. “This is for you”, and I hand her the bills. “You can also have this - BUT - one time only, never again. This is about a week's supply, you can score something in that time. Are we agreed - never again?”
Two things that I need to clarify - a week’s supply for me, if she’s on a roll, is probably about a 4 hour supply for her. AND - if it gets them their fix, an addict will tell you anything that they think you want to hear.
So of course, she was absolutely in agreement. Some things never change.
And surprise!, surprise!, 24 hours later, guess who knocked on my door?
* * *
C no doubt spent the day coming up with all sorts of completely sensible reasons why I should give her more shit. Most likely revolving on the fact that Lydia was the last person who would sell to her. But she’s thrown off, I have a packed pipe on the table next to me, she can’t take her eyes off the prize, she can’t focus...I just let her stammer for a minute. I ask if she wants the pipe?
Shit eating grin - hell yes! I grab it and reach out towards her. She takes it, but I don’t let go. ‘You can have this one, no problem. You want more, ‘present yourself’”. Ancient code for “submit for kinky sex”. She starts to object, I cut her off: “you can have none, one, or stand, your choice - do you understand your choices?”
Maybe she mumbles “OK”, so I let go and in no time she’s sucking down the pipe. I get a couple beers while she’s busy, set one next to her, pop the top on mine and sip some brew. Done with the pipe, she follows suit. Between the weed and the booze, she relaxes, but after a bit starts starts fidgeting. I wait for it. Finally it pours out: “I don’t think this is a good idea”
I bust out laughing, she doesn’t see what’s so funny. “You’re right, it’s an AWFUL idea, we just don’t agree on what’s the bad part. So maybe we forget about it, huh? Maybe you should just go home”.
Well, no, she doesn’t want that either…“Can’t I have some more?”
“It’s time for you to go, I’ll walk you to the door”.
She takes a deep breath, rises, and puts her hands on her head. Her arms are in the wrong position, her legs aren’t nearly far enough apart … some things never change. I pack the pipe. “You want this?”, she says yes, eyes focused. I spark the lighter and smoke it. From her face, that’s not what she had in mind.
I pack another, walk over to her. “First, if you want your fix, I get mine - is that understood?” She nods. I hold the pipe for her, spark the lighter, and long hit, all gone. She’s holding it in, deep, and I continue, “second, anytime - and I mean ANYTIME - that you feel uncomfortable giving me what I want, just say, “take that shit and shove it where the sun don’t shine”.
Suddenly the tension’s broken, she cracks up, coughs, blows out the smoke, coughs a little more. “You fuckerhead! - you owe me another!”
I smile. “We’ll see. But I’m serious. Say that phrase and everything stops.” She nods, but I’m not done. “What you gotta realize is that I don’t really want to do this”. Like Hell, but she doesn't need to know that. “You can say that anytime, BUT … once and done. No more weed. Ever”. You can tell she’s not happy about that, but keeps it to herself.
I pack another, then tell her “this is a really good time to tell me that, because if you don’t walk away, I’m going to turn you into my slave. For real.”
She’s heard that before, sarcastically says “of course you are”, tilts her head a little, mocking me with her face, her eyes.
“You heard your choices, tell me what it’s going to be”.
To get their fix, an addict is going to tell you anything they think that you want to hear.
I hand her the pipe, tell her to use the can, have a cigarette, whatever, then get undressed and back in position. “If you’re quick enough, I’ll pack another pipe”. While she’s scurrying on her assignments, I try to find some rope.
* * *
She’s back in position, but instead of being naked, she’s got my robe on - and her socks. Some things never change.
I pack a pipe, point out that she’s not quite undressed. Eyeing the pipe, she tells me “brr, it’s chilly!”, her code for gimme the pipe, and let’s go to bed and fuck. Well that ain’t gonna happen, so instead of giving it to her, I spark the lighter and smoke it myself. She has a frustrated look on her face.
“Why don’t you turn the furnace on, and relax a bit. When it’s warm enough, strip and return to position. When you’re ready, I’ll get you another pipe” She sticks out her tongue, turns up the furnace, sits, but the blower’s barely on before she’s lost the robe and is back in position. I pack the pipe full enough that even she’s gonna need a few minutes, hand it to her. While she’s working it, I look over the body that I once knew so well.
Five years of hard living has taken its toll, but she’s still a great looking lady. Tall for a woman, long torso and average legs, she’s blonde, slender, tits in damn nice shape (hey - we’re all getting older, things ain’t the way they used to be, nothing’s wrong with that, but it doesn’t mean I can’t notice tits that gravity hasn’t found yet.)
She’s set down the pipe so apparently she’s done. I walk behind her, tell her to cross her wrists, which she does it the wrong way - surprise! - which I correct, wrap the rope and tie it securely. My feet push her legs further apart, I grab her hair and pull her backwards so she’s a little past the tipping point, take my free hand and caress her face, my lips find hers...
Our lips and tongues play as my hand finds its way to her breast, stroking the one, squeezing it, finding the nipple, pulling, twisting, back to main tittie and fondle some more, soon the other tit has my attention and it’s on to part deux. Mission accomplished, my hand returns to her forehead, another cycle begins, this one ending at her navel.
A couple more cycles and she’s kissing like she’ll die if something doesn’t happen, finally my hand finds her pussy, palpable heat rising from it...I touch it, she’s dripping wet ...fingers on either side of the clit, squeeze, the clitteral bud, engorged, twitches under the pressure, again and again.... She moans past our kisses, I slide the fingers in her slot…
Out again, slick as can be, fingers strum her clit, right-left right-left right-right-left, the moan does not diminish, she’s begging me to fuck her…but the control freak in me is not ready yet, I play some more…My fingers find her snatch again and I jam them in, fast, over and over...the moan is lower as the orgasm has begun, her voice up and down as the O takes control…
Fingers out but the O continues, I strum her clit, her abs are so tight and she’s over the top again….suddenly I slap her oh so exposed pussy a half dozen times, her O just fucking explodes, she shrieks loud enough to wake a passed out banshee …
I set her down, exhausted. I get ice water, give her a sip, she didn’t realize how thirsty she was. I ask if she wants a smoke, or a fuck? She perks up at fuck, “oh yes please fuck me, I am sooo horny”, so arms released, into the bedroom, onto the bed, a pillow under her ass…
I pull down my pants, off with my shorts, oh my I thought it was hard but this is impressive, it would a crime to lose this boner, and C is looking at it, can’t take her eyes off it, wants it, inside, so I climb onto her, give her pussy what it needs more than anything….
No more fooling around, dick slams into cervix and her abdomen erupts, instant orgasm, cunt even hotter and squeezing tight, won’t let go… I get an urgent message, dick to control center, situation critical, too much pressure, heat, we can’t take much more of this, we’re going to have to unload…
No. I’m not in high school anymore, this doesn’t have to happen. I pull the dick out, pre-cum dripping, trailing, C figures out something’s not quite right, OH NO PLEASE DON’T STOP PLEASE FUCK ME...and I jam it in, thrust as fast and hard as I can, she goes fucking nuts, my dick does the impossible, gets bigger, harder, and it’s that way with each thrust, reactors are critical, pumps overloaded, Captain she’s gonna blow!, and unlike on TV that’s what happens, hot jizz spews into eager pussy and can you say “supernova”? Of course she can, but not now, not enough energy, ambition left to talk. For the first time in five years, we embrace.
As usual, she’s out of bed first, runs to the john, back to me, hugs me...I wonder what she’s going to compliment first, after all it was a stellar performance...I figure she’s going to ask me to slap her pussy again next time...
“Can I have another beer and a pipe?”
Some things never change.
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[ REC ]
Square Filled: Case Fic ; created for @spnkinkbingo
Synopsis: As the team is solving a case involving murders at a local neighborhood, Sam discovers some disturbing video footage.
Word Count: 3672
Forewarnings: explicit video footage, male masturbation, graphic depictions of sex, dirty talk!!!, oral sex (male receiving), foreplay, unprotected sex
A/N: This was kind of stressful because this didn’t turn out how I planned it to be but I hope you still like it. I expect this fic to be underwhelming but hey I appreciate any feedback!
“Drop your weapons. Hands in the air!”
The wooden door was knocked down intensely, creating a loud smack against the floor.
Dean had his pistol targeted at the front, grasped around tightly by the ivory handle and making sure that he was prepped with shooting anything that comes to sight. He went before you and his younger brother, checking to see if the surroundings were clear and signaling for you to come behind once affirming there wasn’t anyone in the establishment, much to your dismay.
Out of frustration, the older brother couldn’t help himself but kick a rusty chair alongside where he was standing. His hand ran over his face subsequently displaying a displeased expression after realizing that the shapeshifter was one step further from you guys. "Goddamnit! The son of a bitch got away again."
It had been over a week yet none of you could get a hold of the infamous creature. There had been multiple corpses found around a neighborhood, in addition to that were the sheds of slimy flesh left behind as the townspeople merely shrugged that concrete piece of evidence which helped you dig deeper in the case.
"Dean I think we need to plan our actions more carefully," Sam deciphers, "the shifter is ahead of us in more ways we can think of at the moment and almost every place we've searched for always ends empty."
“We’ve been researching everything we could about the disappearances and where the creature may have hidden, but how could we have missed something?” you frowned.
Although you weren’t as furious as Dean, your spirits were down couldn’t help but feel a heavy load in your heart seeing as you couldn’t stop the murders happening in town. You were already at the verge of giving up, believing that this may not even be a case involving only a Shapeshifter.
Sam shone his flashlight over your figure and sighed, discerning that you and his brother were already tired even if the time was only half-past eight. “You know we can’t give up on this case just yet. If we plan more carefully then maybe we could acquire a hint that may lead us to its actual location before it finds out.”
“I don’t care. I need a drink.” Dean grumbled, walking right past his younger brother which resulted with his shoulders unintentionally hitting Sam’s side.
You sighed and placed your pistol right back where it belonged, tucked under your shirt, and followed him straight through the doorway. You looked back to see Sam’s gaze following and you replied with, “I’m coming with him, I could use a drink too. We’ll be back in a few, Sammy.”
**********
After a few hours, Sam headed back to the motel room. He immediately grabbed his laptop and plunked to his side of the bed, lifting the screen and powering the gadget, heading to research for more folklores on the internet that could be related to the hunt.
He looked at the digital numbers displayed at the top of his taskbar and perceiving that it was five minutes before the time would strike at eleven o’clock. Neither Dean or you arrived yet but it didn’t bother him much since he could use the time alone – he just hopes that Dean wouldn’t come home too wasted to bring another girl from the pub like last time; he didn’t have to worry about you because he knew you wouldn’t let yourself drown in too much alcohol, especially since you’re likely the one who’s gonna drive his brother back.
Just as he was about to uncover more facts and information about Shapeshifters, an anonymous messaged emerged to his inbox. It was odd and he knew it from the first second, no one should be messaging him at late night, Sam usually expects a call because he only leaves a calling card to any of the witnesses.
But the fact that an email came out from nowhere bubbled up more of his curiosity as he expected it to be related to the case and could give a hint as to what they are catching. His fingers quickly progressed at his trackpad and dragging his cursor to one of his tabs. He scrolled through his inbox until he finally found an unopened mail that displayed a title written in capital letters in bold format.
WHAT IS YOUR DEEPEST DESIRE?
Sam raised an eyebrow not knowing what it meant. It was weird and it could mean anything based on the scenario given, so he didn’t give in much thought to it and rather skimmed to see the information. Eventually, he couldn’t wait any longer and decided to double tap upon the given file.
At first, it only displayed a blank screen whilst loading the contents that he soon found out to be video footage of around three minutes long. Within a few more seconds the screen switched up to a scene where the camera was focused onto a plain motel bedroom with disembodied voices coming from behind the recording. With that, he cannot comprehend what’s going on since he couldn’t hear what the voices were talking about.
The video didn’t have the finest quality so he assumed that it used the webcam of a laptop.
Then two bodies suddenly appeared from the side. It was obvious the pair was a man who was completely naked and too tall for his face to even be included in the frame, and a woman who was still partially clothed in her sexy red lingerie while her height was enough for her face to be seen in the screen.
Once Sam squinted his eyes to get a clearer view of what’s happening. A wave of heat washed down his body as he realized that woman splayed across the screen was none other than Y/N. He worried for a second thinking that maybe you were in trouble somewhere and that you were being held against your will. Except all of his assumptions flushed down the drain immediately after he heard your voice giggling,
“Please! Come on I badly want your big cock, Sammy,” she pleads.
And to his surprise, the man replies with, “Alright. If you say so, princess.”
He swore that voice was strangely familiar – husky and seducing, but he just couldn’t place a finger to it. It sent goosebumps across his skin as he continued watching the explicit footage, he knew this was wrong but somewhere deep down his thoughts it pleaded to carry on and enjoy what there is to present. When the man lowered down to press kisses onto the girl’s neck, Sam didn’t catch a glimpse of his face and rather got a clear view of the toned back muscles he had whereas it definitely got his attention, but the most interesting part was the long locks of hair that was similar to way too similar to his.
“Oh, you’re so good to me, Y/N,” the man in the screen moans out as he unclasps her bra and hauls her panties down past her ankles.
Y/N had a magnificent figure. Sam didn’t want to admit how much he is drawn to you but he couldn’t help it right as it is displayed in front of him. He kept convincing himself to exit the screen and close the device but the evident bulge in his pants persuades him to keep on watching, and so he went with the second option. Though as your breasts were getting sweetly sucked, the man turned to the side of the camera and finally revealed his awaited face.
Sam just saw himself like he was looking into a mirror. He saw his lips attached over your soft skin whilst trying to leave love bites as his large hands grasped around your waist.
Now everything was coming to him and he got a minute to process some things. He recognized his own body and voice which should have been done earlier but got too distracted over the scene. Everything was so accurate with the physical features that he was convinced your bare body looked like that in real life.
“Oh,” a groan escaped from Sam’s lips as his lustful thoughts dominated over the ones that told him to look the other way.
Meanwhile, the fake Sam welcomed himself between your inner thighs as your limbs are enveloping his body. He was ready to penetrate himself into fake Y/N’s sweet little cunt and the real Sam couldn’t help himself anymore but unzip the zipper of his denim jeans and partly pull down his pants enough so his large length could spring out.
His hand began to fist his cock, tightly wrapping it around his palm and gliding it upwards and downwards. He imagined you to be tauter than that and as he looked aside, he saw that you were already a moaning mess as you were enjoying the way fake Sam was penetrating himself while intensely swaying his body and creating a loud slapping sound. “That’s it, princess. You want daddy’s cock deep inside your pussy?”
You kept whining and whining, unable to verbally agree, as you nodded your head repeatedly. The way you took in most of his length was impressing judging by the fact that it was a damn beast. “Good girl, you love being a slut for me don’t you?”
The real Sam muttered, “Fuck.”
This was fueling up more of his fantasies and he didn’t expect for his orgasm to arrive faster than he anticipated. He definitely blames the dirty talk discoursed in the screen. Just imagining you actually loving all of those fetishes made his cock throb and back arch of delight. If given a chance, he couldn’t wait but show you how good he could make you scream in bed.
Eventually, the video ended with both persons coming and filling Y/N’s cunt full of the white fluid as the real Sam came also, releasing all of the jizz all over his lower abdomen which glistened at the illumination of his laptop screen. He was panting so hard as his forehead was streaming down multiple droplets of sweat. He used his other hand that was clean to push the locks of hair back so his view was clearer.
Sam went to take a cold shower so he could clean up all the dirt from his skin. He felt guilty but at the same time relieved from all of the sexual tension built up since he began to take a liking on his best friend.
After two days, Dean got a clue and concluded that it was a shapeshifter that likes to prey around with the people in town, providing and filling their heads full of lustful thoughts until the victim reaches a vulnerable state and there it would attack.
The team didn’t know why the creature suddenly took a liking to them, you and Dean didn’t know why but Sam knew deep down he would’ve been the target. But they didn’t search further for any reasons and merely thanked the heavens they could finally leave the area and head back home to the bunker. “Pack your bags, tomorrow morning we’ll be heading back to Kansas,” Dean reminded Sam as he looked at your figure that was enjoying a deep sleep and he didn’t bother to wake you up.
“O..oh uh yeah sure, Dean,” the younger brother took a moment to respond and his older brother had to raise an eyebrow before he could head to the doorway and reach for the doorknob.
“You okay, Sammy?” he asked and raised his chin, sensing that there was definitely something wrong with his brother, “you’ve been very jumpy since yesterday, is there something I don't know about?”
“N..no, not at all,” he assured and gave a suspiciously wide grin before telling Dean to go on and head to the bar. When the motel door slammed shut and footsteps walked away, your body remained still and dozing.
Meanwhile, Sam was on the other side of the room, sitting on a chair with his laptop in front and atop of the table. Since you seemed to be asleep and had no plans on waking up due to the restless nights from the previous days, the Winchester assumed that he got the room all to himself and he could sort his shit out now.
He looked at the desktop of his device and saw that the video was still there, mocking and intimidating him. He wanted to delete it so bad but his body was refusing to, but eventually, he decided he could sneak one more look at the explicit footage before he would finally remove it from his thoughts.
Sam didn’t intend to look like a pervert or anything but seeing you laying on the bed and picturing you just like how the shifters portrayed you to be in the video, it made him hard within a minute. He double tapped on the icon and it immediately went to full screen and loaded it after a few moments. The same scenario played and he knew what to expect, he lowered the volume down so that it wouldn’t wake you up and began to watch.
He made sure to unbuckle his belt softly and unzip his pants down without having to wake you up. Then he began to repeat those actions like the ones he did days ago which was to wrap his hand around his erecting cock and slowly pump it down as it throbbed in his hand. He looked at the screen and saw that the man was initiating with foreplay and escalating over to eating your cunt out.
His teeth bit down onto his lower lip as he prevented himself from making a sound. He only just threw his head back and his mouth opened in awe, imagining that you were kneeling before him and ready to suck him off. “Fuck, Y/N” he whispered so softly.
You woke up feeling dizzy as your visions were still adjusting to the surrounding after your sleep, but was left shocked and thrilled when your first sight was Sam seated on a chair with his dick out of his pants and enjoying himself. “Need some help there, big boy?” Your voice was raspy yet playful due to having been woken up.
You were sure he didn’t hear you the first time as his eyes were shut securely and his mouth was gaping wide, trying to take in all the pleasure he can get. So you called his name out one more time, a little louder which had caught his attention.
“Y/N, shit you’re aware.” He rapidly tried to cover himself up and slam his laptop shut which shushed all the pornographic moans that came through the speaker.
You let out a subtle chuckle as your feet came in contact with the carpet floor and you stood up, keeping your gaze at Sam who was completely embarrassed and shrunk into his seat. As you wear nearing towards him, Sam’s heartbeat was racing rapidly and he didn’t know what to do next as he merely observed your expressions and eyes filling up in lust.
Was it a dream? Were you actually seducing him into this? Or were you going to slap him on the cheek and leave the room?
There were so many thoughts flooding in his mind that he was too distracted to acknowledge you in front of him. He was flustered and worried that you might tell this to Dean, though as he was about to apologize for the unnecessary actions he portrayed once you had woken up, you gave a cheeky smirk and knelt down before him.
“I... uh,” he stammered.
His hands were shaky when you tried to push them away from covering his half-erect dick and his pants were still unzipped, having to fail when he tried to cover up swiftly. There, you continue to work your way, pulling the garter of his pants down and revealed his length. Your eyes widened at the delightful size of his and your mouth instantly watered, wanting to take in whole as your hand wrapped around it and began to jerk him off.
It was heated and Sam was sweating enough to fill a pool. His emotions were torn between receiving the pleasure and feeling guilty and embarrassed, but you seemed to enjoy it so he tried to relax his system so that he could savor the pleasure. Then you used both your hands, one was wrapped around the base of his cock while the other was used to play around with the slit of his tip. A gently groan escaped his lips as he began to become more rigid, “Yeah you like that, don't you?”
He nodded and bit down onto his lip once he looked down to see you dipping your lips on top of his tip, using it to tease one of his sweet spots gently. Soon enough you couldn’t help yourself but divulge more of his taste, gaping your mouth open and making sure to ease yourself with his large size. You made it halfway at first, bobbing your head back and forth, eventually taking it in as a whole, making sure to cover it completely with your saliva.
Sam gripped around the edge of the table with one of his hands as he was still too shy to try and grasp around your hair. His fingers were a little jittery and his breath was warm. When you looked up, he was purposely trying to avoid staring at you and you didn’t mind, assuming that he was still sheepish and couldn’t comprehend what you just initiated.
“Y/N” he grunts, ”w-want to feel you... want to please you,”
That’s when you took a halt in blowing him off and arose to your feet. He looked forefront at you, confused as to why you stopped but his questions were instantly answered when you began to climb on top of his body. Your legs tried to straddle his sides even with the least amount of space in the chair he was seated on, “Then show me what you can do with me, Sammy.”
An animalistic growl exited from his lips as his large hands gripped on your waist. With no extreme efforts exerted, he lifted you up without any strain and proceeded to carry you in bed just where you were sleeping on earlier. He threw you against the bouncy mattress as you were now lying on your back.
A high-pitched squeal escaped from you as he tugged the hem of your shirt over your head while you unbuttoned your pants and he pulled it down past your legs also. Everything was happening way too fast and within one more moment, both you and Sam were already bare naked and you were lying beneath the giant man.
Sam leaned down to press kisses against your lower jaw, and with those simple actions, you could already feel your sex flooding with arousal. His hands moved to squeeze one of your breasts and used his fingertips to play around with your erect nipples. After some time, his lips traveled further downwards between the valley of your chest and began to suck against the soft skin. Your hands couldn’t help but interweave around his soft locks, gently tugging them as your actions sent another wave of pleasure, “Do that again.”
As he went further, Sam had two fingers pressing against your entrance as it got soaked with your arousal. He teased you at the same time as he was prepping kisses over your upper body and your mind was confused which was felt more intense. “No time for more foreplay, Sammy. I need you inside me already.”
He agreed to your requests and extended his arm to fumble over the bedside table in hopes for a packet of condom. But you were needy and couldn’t wait to feel him fill you up already, “No, I wanna feel you completely raw when you fuck me.”
“Are you sure, princess?”
“Yes. Please,” you panted.
When he positioned himself and slid his length into you, he moaned at the sight of seeing it sink down into your pulsing walls. Once you got to adjust, he began to thrust his hips and he received multiple cries from you whenever the tip of his cock skims over the further end of your pussy. He didn’t use most of his power in moving his body, in fact, he tried to take it slow, yet because of his size, you knew them by the next morning you were going to be extremely sore, “Oh, God!”
“That’s it, you feel so good wrapped around and begging for my cock like that,” he praised you.
As well as hoarsely murmurs, “Tell me how much you want my cock.”
“I want your cock so bad, Sammy. I want to feel it throbbing inside of my walls and I want you to fill me up with your cum until I’m dripping,” Sam grunted as shivers went down his spine due to your smutty talk. You were letting him feel waves of arousals that he has yet to explore.
“Oh, Sam!” you moaned his name out over and over as the bed was already creaking due to the intensity of both your actions.
“S...Sammy.”
“Sam.”
“Sam!” A light tap on his cheek awoken him from his sleep. He panicked at first, unable to discern who was disturbing him from his sleep,” H-huh, what?”
Once he comprehended that it was you who stood in front of him. Sam immediately straightened his back and wiped the drool that streamed down the corners of his mouth. He was seated on the chair just like last night and he seemed to fall asleep with his face and arms resting on the table, in addition, was his laptop beside which was already running out of battery.
“You were making some serious happy noises there man,” his brother chuckled at him, “who were you dreaming about, huh?”
“Shut up.”
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