define "transgender swag" and i'll do it

easy. characters who you can confidently say are transgender not because there's necessarily anything textually trans about them (though there might be--see viola) but because their vibes are off the charts

Horatio and Ophelia are never confirmed as being in a scene together, and do not share so much as a single line of dialogue.

went to the best store on the planet aka barnes & noble yesterday with my heart set on shakespeare and had a crisis over whether i should get Fantasy Space Lesbian Necromancers or Man in Coma Loses Memory and Saves Human Race but with Real Physics (both of which i have yet to read but desperately want to) so of course i walked out with hamlet and the four swords manga *sighs in nerd*

i'm being mean on twt again

Yes, Delenn started a war. Yeah, that's objectively bad. But do we really think that EarthGov would have given anyone the courtesy of asking about why they killed a significant (political) figure before committing massive violations of the Geneva Convention?

Obviously we shouldn't condone this behavior- but let's at least give it some perspective:

It's literally her first day on the job. she just finished her internship the night before

she's been trained for this role and this role alone, her life experience is limited at best and nonexistent at worst

her mentor just died -> that's essentially going from training wheels on flat and even ground, with a helmet to a unicycle on a mountain during fire season... uphill

nobody really cared about what she said until 20 minutes ago when she became One of Them

there were four other members of the Grey Council that were pro-war, she didn't decide to go to war by herself

running onto the dash covered in blood did you all know that one of the dead poets society boys is sam waterston's kid I just spent five minutes pacing the apartment upon learning this

Spelling was not standardized in Shakespeare's England

yes this is my point. william "sex jokes" "historical RPF" shakespeare is broadly upheld as the pinnacle of english literature, and zero percent of his works conform to any standardized spelling/grammar system

"shakespeare couldn't spell his own name" is shorthand for "the snobbery of ~english literature & canon~ is both self-contradictory and arbitrary in the extreme." & to me this means that anyone can create whatever they want and be just as good as any shakespearean sonnet. bc the only real qualifier for "good writing" is that somebody cared about the story they were telling, and the only real qualifier for "good reading material" is that someone, somewhere, wants to read it

no gods no kings no earl of oxford only a bunch of plays written in a drama club's groupchat and the people who keep investing them with meaning. there is no magic formula or golden standard. the only thing that gives any art any value is the people who choose to value it

what if i said my genuine opinion of "rom the vacuous spider" is that she's actually not like, peaceful because she's stupid, she's just extremely fucking chill bc she's so enlightened. like she WILL defend herself but really she just wants to hide in her cool lake world and hide dark rituals

also ALSO what an insane pairing tennant and sheen was together. like two of the most earnest ass Shakespeare trained actors delivering some of the craziest ass lines and then BRUSHING STRAIGHT PAST IT EVERY TIME. you people are fucking DEMENTED

i need to know more about cornley's production of hamlet. specifically who was playing polonius.

Ok you can't just say that and then NOT give us your hamlet adaptation tier list???? 👀👀

*cracks knuckles* well i’m no expert but….

seriously, i’m no expert i’m not big on movies HOWEVER i will rank the ones i have seen for you which, admittedly, is not many and certainly lacks a few key adaptations a lot of people swear by. i apologize in advance for probably way over-answering your question and also infodumping about Hamlet on all the people following me for mediocre anime content. with that in mind, here they are from best to worst (i didn’t think there was enough to warrant an acutal tier list also i was lazy):

1) Kenneth Branagh’s full-text Hamlet (1996)

Is explanation needed here? it’s stunning, it’s lovely, it’s four beautiful hours of faithful text recreation. You can seduce me in one easy step by sitting through this entire monster of a film with me. Not to say it doesn’t have its flaws because it certainly does but seriously it’s a no-brainer for me that this one is number one. I’m a sucker for faithful Shakespeare adaptations and this bad boy is all over that.

Best aspect: Branagh’s performance as Hamlet is just *chef’s kiss* his performance of the soliloquies lives rent free inside my brain

Worst aspect: Kate Winslet’s Ophelia is…..certainly there. I don’t think I’ve ever seen an Ophelia depiction I’ve really liked but this one bothers me a lot especially aside Branagh’s Hamlet.

2) Tom Stoppard’s ‘Rosencrantz & Guildenstern Are Dead’ (1990)

I’ve got a lot of fondness for this one! It’s funny, genre aware, meta-comedic. Gives Monty Python vibes and is based off one of my favorite Hamlet theories. Even with all that, it ALSO inspires a lot of good analysis of Hamlet. I think it’s a great example of how Shakespearean type word play retains its appeal. Wrote a pretty bomb paper about it last semester. I’m looking forward to getting my hands on the play to read.

Best aspect: I LOVE seeing how they place the original play in the backgrounds. Very fun.

Worst aspect: I hate to admit this but the build up to the play within the play in the original texts is one of my least favorite parts so having that extended wasn’t my cup of tea, even with the symbolism and omnipotence that came along with the players.

3) Laurence Olivier’s Hamlet (1948)

Ohh there’s love in this one, it’s palpable. I firmly believe that if you want a good grasp on Hamlet without having to read any of the texts or watch Branagh’s 4-hour version - this bad boy is your best option. It’s very faithful and aesthetically?? This one is stunning. I love that Olivier kept it black and white (yes, technicolor was available) and the architecture of the castle is really cool. It’s very careful with what it cut and what it rearranged and I respect it for that.

Best aspect: The. GHOST. What can I say I’m a sucker for a good ghost depiction and Olivier NAILS it. And the ambiguity of the ghost’s appearance during the closet scene? *chefs kiss* i LOVE this ghost yall

Worst aspect: I thought a long time about this but I’m gonna go with overall line delivery. A lot of I-am-reading-Shakespeare type delivery in this one which I really dislike - essentially just very stiff and emotionless. ***Negative points for the Oedipal Reading I want to gut Freud like a pig.

4) Gade’s Silent Hamlet (1920)

Woman Hamlet? GOOD. Love triangle? BAD. VERY BAD. I like how it also based itself a bit on the pre-Shakespeare Hamlet story. Also Hamlet without any words is just kind of cool to watch. Felt a bit gross to watch though when you read about the theory it was playing on - Vining I think is the authors name if you’re looking to read about how fragile masculinity is. Final scene is a little funny because Laertes just sort of backs away and is never seen again?? Like I don’t think he even dies lol

Best aspect: I LIKE silent Hamlet. I can’t get nitpicky or mad about dialogue changes. It’s a really cool medium for Shakespeare I think.

Worst aspect: I’ll say it again: love triangle BAD. The idea of Horatio being in love with Ophelia weirds me the hell out. Also, and I KNOW it’s from 1920, but the way they managed to make such a homoerotic premise THAT straight is insane. Lot of people claim Romeo and Juliet as the most misinterpreted romance but tbh I think Hamlet and Ophelia could give them a run for their money.

Me bashing every film on this list aside from #2 with a bat: Hamlet isn’t a love story HAMLET ISNT A LOVE STORY

5) Almereyda’s Hamlet (2000)

I am in physical pain. I am being tortured. The answer is not to be because GOOD LORD. Don’t watch this. I’m begging you to save yourself. Please. I didn’t even know it was possible to make ME hate every character in Hamlet but god here we are. Truly a perfect example of taking the worst of something. Modern Hamlet with butchered original dialogue GOD. Watch this if you want to drive yourself temporarily insane. The ending scene killed me. I still haven’t recovered. Yeah this is the one from the post.

Best aspect: the soundtrack was okay.

Worst aspect: idk all of it. This isn’t the worst aspect but one of the more annoying ones was shifting Marcellus (extremely minor character) to a girl just to be Horatio’s girlfriend and then giving her no additional role or dialogue?? She was LITERALLY just a prop to show how Mega Het™️ Hortatio and Hamlet are. Demons. The whole movie is full of demons sent to attack me specifically. ***Negative points for the Oedipal Reading but GOD i think that’s somehow the least of our concerns

me @ a kaeya hamlet au

You ever think the reason Horatio was so loyal to Hamlet was because he felt like he was responsible since he showed him the ghost in the first place?

How to explain to a child that I do not know things. They keep asking why!

Also why strangling their leaders/teachers/people in general is a bad idea...

This answer got long, so it's behind a read more

Okay, tackling the first one first: Hey [kid's name], it's so cool that you want to know things! I love to learn, and you want to know something really cool? Grown ups are still learning too! There are so so many things to learn, and I haven't learned them all yet. I've learned a lot about [subject I like I don't mind talking to kids about], but I don't know much about [subject kid keeps asking about that I don't know about].

Depending on the kid and my frustration level, that's the point where I'd either say: From what you've been asking, it sounds like you really want to learn about [subject] today. Is that right? (modify subject if needed until they agree) Let's start with [specific question] and see what we can learn! (and then pull out my phone or a reference book and find the answer to the question) Or I'd say: I'm sorry, but I'm not the right person to ask to learn more about [subject]. There are so many things to learn, and everybody likes to learn about different things, so sometimes you have to ask a few people before you find the person who can teach you. I think [name] might be able to help you/I don't know who the right person is to talk to, but I can help you write a list of questions so you can find books next time you go to the library/to ask your grown ups when you get home. If they have trouble understanding that I don't want to talk about [subject], I'd say: You know how [sibling/other kid the kid knows/character from a tv show they like] likes [subject] but [other sibling/kid/character] doesn't like [subject] and likes [other subject] instead? I am more like [second person]. It's okay to like different things; [person A from example] and [person B from example] are still friends, right? (honestly I was thinking about Huey, Dewey, and Louie from the newer Ducktales for that) I personally wouldn't tell the kid I don't want to talk about [subject] unless it's something inappropriate for kids because I don't want to encourage them, but I have also listened to four year olds talk about minecraft for so long I understand the urge. I'd try to redirect them into another activity instead.

:)

today I once again mourn the fact that so many people live their whole lives without ever once reading, nay, ever even knowing of Schiller’s Don Carlos’s existence. 

RIP Enjolras stans, y’all would have loved Rodrigo.