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inbarfink · 8 months

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I have… so many little thoughts about Simon’s shift in the climax of ‘Prismo the Wishmaster’. He’s so ready to give up, to resign to Death By Interdimensional Beetle Cop. And the thing that pulls him out of it, gets him to see a purpose in his life again, is seeing Fionna cry.

And this moment is so important for Fionna and Cake because this is their first moment to really process the Implications and Consequences of their magical adventure. You know, it’s not just a dream you can wake up from - this is actually a matter of life and death and the fate of their entire world.

And it’s actually, also kinda the same from Simon’s perspective? Even if he was already told they are real and have been real all along a while ago - I think seeing Fionna break out in tears is really the moment where he processed her not as a manifestation of Ice King’s madness, not as yet another way the universe is kicking him when he’s down, not as a cruel joke at his expense. But really actually as people, who need his help.

And, I think about this, also in context with this moment?

Simon Petrikov is… a dad at heart. Simon’s first focus episode in F&C starts with a prologue of him and Marceline surviving in the wasteland. Showing that despite being under much more miserable circumstances

he still seemed to hold himself together far better than present-day Simon.

Because the need to protect Marcy and keep her happy was giving him purpose and a motivation to hold himself together.

And this desire to help and nurture and protect is clearly still deep within him. It’s just that now he feels incapable for doing so. In both body-

And spirit -

But now, suddenly, he is once again the Only Person Who Can Help this younger person in distress.

And I think that is a huge part of his motivation to keep on going right now. I mean, just look at how quickly he goes from dismissing Fionna and Cake - into basically declaring that he has to protect them. And fully willing to sacrifice his own identity and sanity to bring magic back to their world because he knows it’ll make Fionna and Cake happy. Because the moment he saw Fionna tear up, he basically decided to Adopt her.

And that’s, you know, technically a step forward - but it is a very very imperfect step.

Like, at the very least he’s not drinking his sorrows away while waiting for death out of pure despair and spite. At least he has a sense of purpose and a reason to open up for others again and bond. And we’ve seen how much this has been a great coping mechanism for pulling himself together through difficult times.

My guess is that after two episodes of only seeing Simon Petrikov at his lowest and very worst - Fionna and Cake are finally going to get an understanding of Simon’s actual positive qualities as his dad-instincts are going to bring them up to the surface again.

Buuuuuuuut….

You know, tying your sense of self-worth and motivation entirely to how well you can Dad is not particularly healthy in the long run either. And it’s going to cause problems both for Simon and for F&C.

Looking at it from what's best of Simon, for the sake of protecting Fionna and Cake and making them happy by bringing magic and wonder back into their world - Simon is willing to throw himself right into the suffering and trauma that he’s been fearing all this time and has been trying so hard to get away from. I mean, it’s also about how Simon has started to miss being Ice King in a weird twisted way and how he resigned himself to being miserable in general. It’s also about that, but the part that he actually says out loud is that he’s doing this to protect Fionna and Cake.

So that’s, you know, still very Not Good. Simon can’t hang his entire ability to properly function on there being Younger People who need his protection. He can't actually move forwards by trying to relive the Better Times of the Horrible Post-Apocalyptic Wasteland. That's not a sustainable coping mechanism. And it’s an incredibly unhealthy amount of self-sacrifice.

And on Fionna’s side… she never said she wanted Simon to protect her.

She might want a useful teammate or a helping hand, she might need a friend. But I don’t think she needs a Dad. Simon is surely old enough to be her father (even just counting his age biologically and not the fact he’s 1058 years old) but Fionna’s not a Literal Child like Marcy was. Fionna Campbell is a grown-ass woman in her early 30’s (Finn is 29 years old right now and there was always kinda the implication that Fionna was a bit older than him).

(And, heck, if she IS the daughter of a gender-flipped Minerva Campbell, she is probably not in the market for a new overprotective dad. She’s fully booked out on that.)

AND while Fionna does not possess full memories of her magical-adventuring-self, she clearly retains some of her fighting and athletic abilities.

Meanwhile Cake is clearly an adult in cat years and is just as much of an insanely powerful shapeshifter as Jake was.

So where does this middle-aged scrawny nerd get off, acting like it’s his job to sacrifice his mind in order to protect them?

And Fionna very much wants to be the hero, she wants to be at the center of the action. It is no coincidence that her own idealized version of Ice King/Simon is a Tuxedo Mask.

Someone who can give her a helping hand and words of encouragement when things get rough -

But still lets her be the main hero of the story.

And you know, right now Fionna and Cake have not fully processed the implications of Simon choosing to become Ice King… but once they see a bit of who Simon really is at his better moments. Yeah, they’re probably gonna have some objections to the idea that he should throw his entire identity away just for their own sake.

Back when Simon allowed the Crown to slowly consume him so he could protect Marcy, it felt like a noble sacrifice. It really seemed like he had no other options. But now he has the entire multiverse on his disposal and two serious badasses on his side. Simon has to learn to see the difference between a codependent senseless self-sacrifice and something that will actually help Fionna and Cake.

So if Simon is really going to lean too hard on his Dad aspect, it’s actually going to cause some really big problems down the line. For his own mental well-being, and for Fionna and Cake. It is in a way, a step in the right direction. And I think it’s going to lead to our main trio finally becoming closer and understanding each other - but unless Simon learns to temper himself, it’s going to cause some serious interpersonal conflicts.

At least this is my thoughts about these interactions right now. I know they’ve been really short but I think they’re really full of Meaning and Emotions. But really, we’ll just have to wait and see.

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geminimoonmadness · 1 year

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Astrology observations

These are my own personal astrological observations. Part 1

🦋Natal Observations:

Capricorn moon toddlers are like mini grown men.

I know I’ve said this before but I want to include it again in this list. Mercury rules Virgo & Gemini, both representing intelligence. Virgo’s intelligence is the brain (introverted) whilst Gemini’s intelligence is the mouth/tongue (extroverted)

If you have your Jupiter conjunct your Saturn you are gifted with a strong will and you’re extra determined to succeed in life.

Aries/Scorpio & 1st house Mars placements may be prone to acne and scars/abrasions on their skin

Having your North node conjunct Chiron may mean you need to forgive someone in this life

Taurus won’t change their mind whilst their co ruler Libra won’t make up their mind

South Node in the 11th House (North Node 5th House) will have friends from past lives join them in this life. They will meet new friends they feel they’ve known forever

Venus, Jupiter and/ or moon in the 5th house are usually quite fertile and likely to have more kids then most. Gemini moon in the 5th house is an indicator of twins.

Pluto conjunct Moon gives someone more deep and intense feelings then most, they sometimes don’t know how to cope and if they don’t have an outlet for their emotions it can turn dark.

People with a Libra Mars 12th house tend to have no backbone and struggle to stand up for themselves

The 9th house can represent your long distance friendships and your travel style

People with a Pisces Mercury are always told to speak up because they’re talking to quiet/softly and feel hella attacked/embarrassed every time they speak up

Scorpio 10th house makes you private in regards to your career. You don’t talk about your home life whilst at work and you don’t talk about work when you’re at home.

Having Scorpio in the 1st house makes you generally a private person whilst having Scorpio in the 12th house may make you an open book/open person.

Fire Mars and Mars in the 1st house placements won’t hesitate to speak up in public, especially to make a complaint of service

Pisces risings may feel like life is going too fast for them to catch up sometimes. They also get random epiphanies.

Mercury in Capricorn are usually skeptics

Taurus & libra risings are the most what’s considered ‘naturally beautiful’

Capricorn Risings (father) and Cancer Risings (mother) are typical parent/guardian energy and naturally act older then they are

Gemini moons love to crack jokes about things that are sad/bringing them down in order to lighten the mood

12th house stellium’s don’t like sharing much about themselves as they’re always misunderstood and don’t feel seen

If you’ve hurt a Scorpio, I can promise you that they want you to suffer.

Pets:

Scorpio dogs will stare at you just like a Scorpio rising will. This is them analysing you.

Capricorn puppies are self reliant and well trained even without being trained.

Cancer animals will be friends with everyone, all other animals & humans.

Aquarius pets will have a unique character and not always act as expected. For example, an Aquarius pitbull I knew would act like a cat, he’d try to sit in your lap and walk along the back of the couch like a cat even though he was trained as an emotional support dog.

✨✨✨

I really enjoyed making this! Let me know in the comments if you have any of these placements or know someone who does and if they resonate with you! Any feedback and further insight is always welcome. What do you want to see me post next?

Copyrights reserved © geminimoonmadness

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rainbowchaox · 7 months

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Analysis of Pissa So Far.

This is a essay looking at our favorite death dads and how their relationship changed and their different nuances from to start to most recent. This will primarily look at the major three times we had Phil and Missa interact from the start with being paired for the eggs to recently the Mexican Independence Party. So bare with me and come with me down memory lane.

I rewatched day 1 of the pairing up of pissa to mainly cope with CERTAIN lore that happened recently. And yes it’s as fluffy and cute as I remembered. But let’s start at the beginning. Before the pairing up Missa and Phil knew of each other casually like acquaintances. In real life along with in general their characters/cubitos. (Again major thanks for the server in general bringing all these wonderful creators together.) Anyways the first time Phil met Missa was when he jumped off the wall and gave them food. I like to imagine missa had a non-serious crush on the man. But they didn’t really interact. And it’s fair to understand why.

But then the egg event happened. Which honestly in my opinion was the best event to bring the Spanish and English sides together organically. And looking back now it WORKED. So back on track everyone goes to the adoption center and like most Qsmp events it’s total chaos. Phil chooses his ticket and when I rewatched it Missa literally like spammed clicked it to break it and get Phil. Atleast that is what it looks like to me. So we already have the seeds of simp Missa from the very start. Also can we all take a break and just realize they both got tickets with D? And literally they are Deathduo? The more I rewatch the pairing lottery the more I think it was rigged by the admins and not actually by chance. Every duo either had similar humor or charm.

Immediately Phil and Missa find out they both have D. And it’s casual no romantic undertones the cubitos are still getting to know each other. But Missa being a sweetheart immediately is like you can choose whatever egg. And I think this is when Phil starts to soften and gets majorly endeared towards the clumsy reaper. Like not a crush. Not love. But the seeds of the adoration and love we see from Phil down the road. The fact of the matter Phil let Missa choose Chayanne name. The fact literally the newly formed death family was being fluffy and saying chayanne will be the best egg while literally everyone was screaming in the background. Its the main thing that would later define the dynamic of the ship. The gentle understanding and teamwork. That would later be a staple whether you ship them platonically or romantically.

And chayanne is the best way to show why pissa was meant to always work. Chayanne personality and hobbies all came from his two dads (Literally the reason chayanne was interested in cooking so much was because Missa taught him to cook). And like Phil once he was thrust into parenthood with Missa immediately found him endeared by his assigned husband? The amount of times he laughed because of Missa. Another theme so important to why pissa works so well.

Missa is Philzas calm balm. He relaxes Phil so much. And that’s so rare for that to happen. So of course a hour or so in taking care of their son. Phil visibly softens and gets endeared to the man. Phil immediately starts worrying about missa when he left. Missa may have fallen first but Phil fell harder. Like more time Phil spends with Missa the more comfortable and at ease he gets. Missa fully was like I have the best husband ever let me casually call you pet names.

Not to mention two popular scenes burned into the minds of fans. The moment when Mariana called Phil my love and tried to steal him. And Phil being Phil immediately was I’m okay with my partner thank you very much. And both Missa and Phil cuddled close. I still think Missa fell day 1 but Phil was quickly getting a crush on his assigned husband. Secondly Phil literally invited Missa to bed.

Their dynamic was one of like relaxation of trust and just both trying their best for Chayanne. They easily slid into a cute dynamic as both got endeared to the others. And also in day 1 Phil never said platonic it’s only after day 1 he started using that. And only when he wasn’t with Missa. He is a repressed romantic guy struggling with a crush. Not to mention the crows practically grew so attached to Missa it was insane to see.

Anyways like most couples they had to both take care of chayanne until Missa canonically got kidnapped by wolves for four months. During the time Missa was there he was pining HARD for Phil. Calling him his love and darling in Spanish. Phil meanwhile keep saying it was platonic and most of the fans accepted that. But then Missa was gone.

And cubito Phil missed him so fucking much. It’s at this point I fully believe is when Phil finally realized he loved him. He kept referencing Missa. He made armor for Missa. He dyed his backpack black with a skull because of Missa. It’s truly my belief that Philza realized he fucking adored the man in Missas absence. He never gave up waiting for Missa. And Missa eventually kept his promise and came back to his family.

And this is when you see some of nuance or facets change slightly in their dynamic. The core is the same all the way back from day 1 but it does change. It somehow becomes softer and domestic. Sure Philza even before his grand realization in Missa absence SPOILED missa. Missa made him soft. But when the reunion happened? Somehow Philza softens even more. Somehow he spoils Missa even more. This is why I believe that Philza finally realized he loves Missa. Because there is a clear increase in the affectionate displays between them.

Philza and the rest of the server went on the mission once Missa appeared. It was legit like Philza forgot that he was a mission. Philza when Missa appeared immediately softened so much. Of course Philza isn’t angry he’s gone. He just missed his husband. And voila once asked by Cellbit “oh this is your husband?!” He immediately agreed. This is important because for months if someone asked about who is Missa he would always and never fail to say Missa is his platonic partner/husband.

But in the reunion Philza just said husband. Because in my opinion Philza fully thought of Missa his romantic partner. The fact that Philza showed everyone including Missa the skull on the black backpack almost like a bird showing off his feathers. And Missa was immediately all gushy. The fact he only looked at Missa when he said you can go into my boat. And felps not realizing the sorta of energy the two of them was having immediately was cursed to be a third wheel.

Like literally felps was in the back of the boat being all “just ignore that I’m here” when literally Philza and Missa were lost in their own fucking world. Gently flirting with each other. Felps was regretting majorly getting in the boat with them so no wonder he bounced as soon as possible. And literally they were left by themselves still on a mission to save people. But I won’t lie it was a date.

Just them loving in each other company. And Philza being so gentle and loving and protective towards Missa. Their dynamic at their core is the same yes. But it’s undeniably more romantic. And Missa side of the dynamic also changes. He starts trying his best to protect Philza. The man who has from the start been protecting him and their son.

Missa slowly starts to become more brave and actually comments on how attractive Phil is in front of him. (I can see your pecs….yes Missa we get it you love Phil). They are closer than ever. Phil also immediately accepts Missa as Tallulah other dad. Do you guys know how massive that is? He trusts and loves Missa so darn much to let him easily be part of his whole family.

And eventually Missa had to go for a bit. But the amount of pissa interaction we get during the renuion stream doesn’t end. We have loads more to dissect. Missa comes back in hope to see his son and new daughter but sadly they were sleeping but later on despite showing Tubbo around. Once he saw Missa was whispering to him in chat immediately left as soon as possible to get to his husband. Also Cellbit who was with him and tubbo was immediately like “oh you need to help your husband understandable” while tubbo was just like so confused.

Meanwhile before this Missa was crying wanting to go back to Phil. Phil is his safety blanket. Phil never fails to make him feel safe and secure and protected. There’s reasons why Missa fell so quickly. And they met up. And to bring up my earlier point above. What Phil does nest is one of my primarily reasons why I believe Phil fully realizes he loves Missa.

Yes Phil spoils Missa. It’s his love lanuage but all the gifts and upgrades he did late at night (which Phil made a mission to give stuff to Missa before he logged off.) and even the armor he made so long ago. The amount of spoiling and pampering just screams love, adoration, and affection.

And of course they get sorta matching backpacks. And of course Missa says he loves him so fast so the translator doesn’t pick it up. This leds to when Missa showed up by himself had a loony toon day before being called out by roier. He fully says he loves Philza. LOVES PHILZA. TE AMO. Romantic.

Most of the fans knew because just look how Missa acted. But once it was confirmed Missa feels romantic feelings for Philza? That’s when the majority starting fully accepting them as romantic soulmates. And started seeing Philza actions how they are. Romantic. (Though if you prefer them as platonic that’s also very valid).

The only reason a pissa wedding or confession haven’t happened is because Missa loves Philza so much he doesn’t want to make him uncomfortable or burden him with his feelings for him. If philza said let’s get married he would accept immediately. But knowing Phil he will say nothing about loving Missa because he is scared he won’t be able to be protect.

And more recently. The Mexican Independence Day party. I won’t lie the times they were together they were always flirting. They were so cute. And both in my eyes were getting brave with their love for the other in their own ways. Missa literally screaming VIVA TE AMO on stage when Roier said Philza. Or Philza making sure he follows Missa during the dance. The fact Philza was so gentle explaining the recent egg disappearance and made a comment of being shock that Missa came back (he misses Missa so much each time he is gone.).

And their dynamic switches slightly again. Because Phil the whole time was worried and hovering around Missa when ingesting everything lore at once. And Missa is again getting brave he fully said he going on a date with Phil. It’s romantic. There’s no way I can personally can see it otherwise (though again if you like them platonic you are hella valid). At the start there was seeds but their romance has grown. They love each other. They need to confess for my sanity. And I fully trusts that Missa will have some sort of role in saving his love. And maybe perhaps we can get a confession or wedding in the future-

#qsmp #pissa #I’m dead guys. THIS is literally my two essays combined #Leave your thoughts on tags.#or comments #I hope you enjoyed this summary? recap? of pissa as a dynamic from the start to more recent.#yes I know I’m normal about them #LET ME BE FREE #this is how I cope mates.#qsmp shipping #pissa newspaper

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romana-after-dark · 7 months

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Blessed Be The Fruit: Part 2

Commander!Joel Miller x Handmaid!Reader

Series masterlist Join dark!Romana's tag list Dark!Romana's Masterlist

(sorry if you get two notications, accidentally posted this to my mainlol)

Summary: A few decades into Gilead’s conception, you head into your first posting as a handmaid after an affair with a guardian landed you in trouble. Determined to keep your head low in order to keep your son safe, you take on the moniker of OfJoel. Commander Miller has very little to do with you and mrs. Miller regards you with disgust, however you find solace in an unlikely friendship with Commander Miller’s daughter from a handmaid 14 years ago, Ellie who just got done with wives school. You and your friend, Ofthomas start teacher her and her friend Reilly under her mothers nose. Slowly, Commander Miller begins spending time with you and you begin to learn more about the man he was before and an affair begins outside the confines of the ceremony. Although initially you go along with it out if survival, you find yourself falling for the version of Joel you saw in these late night rendezvous.

Which Joel is really him, and how will he react when his own daughters secrets are revealed?

Content and Warnings: DARK JOEL! DUB CON!

Although no violent rape happens like in TWW, reader is under systemic misogyny and a society of ritualized sex abuse. Everything other than the violent rape scenes, everything that happen in either The Handmaids Tale book or show are liable to happen here including but not limited to discussion of rape, child abuse, child marriage, ritualized sexual abuse, sexual abuse in general, acts of violence, major character deaths, mentions of miscarriage but never shown and never pregnancies we know of. Big ole homophobia warning, specifically in regards to lesbophobia. As for Joel, PIV sex, breeding kink, degrading (slut, whore etc but thing like Raider!joel) forced breeding and breeding kink, power dynamics, Joel is not the good guy but he’s also not the worst, slightly rough sex but not violent. Warnings are liable to be added as the story goes but I’ll always update. As always if I miss something please tell me, but i extensively label my warnings and in the end media consumption is your own choice. If you would like to know if this is a happy ending or not you can message me and I’ll tell you that way I don’t spoil for everyone but you can decide if this is for you.

Immersability: Reader has long hair, can conceive children theoretically. At one point, she has to pose as Ellie's mother and I know this can be loaded in terms of skin tone. I am no genetics expert but I know dark skinned parents can have white passing children, like Lional Richie and Nicole Richie. It's up to you to see if this is going to take you out of the story or not.

Support writers, reblog and leave comments!

Additional warnings: forced blowjob but reader is into it. Still dub con bc the nature of everything.

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It was a strange feeling, knowing the entire household was keeping track of your monthly cycle. Mrs. Miller had been cued in by Aunt Lydia of where you were at last week, and since then you were told the date of the next ceremony; the night during the highpoint of your fertility. You wondered, not the first time, why the ceremony was only once a month, not during the entire time of ovulation, or why not two or three times a day… but you supposed that’s where the wives would draw a line. No rights to reading or education, no voice, no power. One wrong move and you too can become the victim of ritualized rape… but no, your husband fucking a random woman more than *checks notes you aren’t actually allowed to read* once a month is too far.

Internal humor is how to cope. The reality of the situation was terrifying, but it’s not like you were shocked by the idea. You had grown up your whole life knowing this would be your fate if you strayed; well, if you strayed and you were fertile. That fertility is what landed you in this problem in the first place.

It wasn’t love. There was no grand story to it. You were married at 15 to a man in his 20’s who hit you, as was his right. Even that wasn’t as dramatic as it could have been, just slaps, shoved into furniture, things of that sort. When a local guardian made advances, you took him up on it. The sex was fine, and eventually produced a baby; your son, who looked just like his real father.

The guardian was sent to a new local and seemed indifferent to his son who was placed with some commander and his wife. You didn’t even get to say goodbye to him. He probably has a new name now, something biblical, and you often wonder what it is, what word it is that calls his attention. Babies recognize their name around 6 months after all. Benjamin? Levi? Asa? You named him… well, that doesn’t really matter now. It’s a name he’ll never know as his.

Angela had a better story. There was a group of you, a few other handmaids in your region and Angela rallied you all together, sharing your real names and stories. She had lived one hell of a life, always brave. As a low ranking wife she went behind her husbands back for the underground resistance at the young age of 16 and was pregnant a few times, none of which made it very long. For ten years she fought against Gilead, continuing the tradition of her youth. Hell, even before Gilead’s official formation she fought, being a part of pro-LGBT and women’s rights activism since middle school. After her husband was killed in war a guardian attempted to rape her and Angela stabbed him to death. Badass. Gilead didn’t see it that way, despite espousing wanting to protect women. She was going to be hung, of course, but a pregnancy test reviled she was pregnant again, a baby she carried to term, this time. He died of illness a few months later. Regardless, she’d had a healthy baby, and was sent to Thomas Miller’s for her first posting last year.

Aunt Lydia had told Angela that this commander Miller would suit her temperament and you understood what that meant. Angela had confirmed the impression that you had gotten early that week.

Thomas Miller had kind eyes. The kind of eyes that warmed you, relaxed you. You bet he was a charmer in another life. The brothers seemed close, Joel- Commander Miller you mean, lighting up around him like you only see with Elizabeth.

Commander Miller adored his daughter, that much was clear. Many men in Gilead only viewed their children -especially daughters- as possessions or pawns, but it was clear it wasn’t like that between them. You wondered if that closeness is why she wasn’t married yet. At 14 she had been out of wives school for a few months, and it was time to at least get her betrothed. God forbid she waste of moment of potential fertility. Yet, Commander Miller didn’t even seem to be looking.

Few knew more than him how dangerous it was as a woman in this world, and Elizabeth wasn’t a woman- she was a child, still. Commander Miller also seemed aware that Elizabeth was… particular. She only had one friend, Riley, a child from before the handmaid system who was married already. Mrs. Jones, she was called by Lisa, you and Mrs. Miller (who always tried to do things by the book). Joel refused to call her Mrs. Jones, saying “I’m not addressing a child who I’ve been forced to play dolls with as Mrs. anything. She’s Riley to me.” Outside though he did things right. Can’t be too familiar with another man’s wife, even if he’s known that wife since she was in pull ups.

The ceremony was tonight, and it seemed like everyone knew. Angela did, but only because you mentioned it.

“Got any questions?” She asked you, always the older sister, even if she only had a few years on you.

“Believe it or not, I’m not a virgin.” You joke back.

Angela laughs and nudges you with her shoulder. “I know, it’s just your first ceremony. I mean, it’s pretty straightforward to what they teach you in the Rachel and Leah Center, only-” She seemed to shut herself off with that, but you urge her on.

“Only what? You can’t leave me there.”

She swallowed thickly before attempting again, somewhere between a cringe and a childish giggle. “Well, you know, genetically-”

“Angela.”

“Brothers have similarities-”

“Just say it!”

Angela stopped, pulling you in to whisper. “Tommy has a massive cock.”

You stand there frozen in shock until a guardian shouts at you to keep moving and stop whispering. There was a lot there, including the implication that if they share genetic similarities, Joel might be harder to take than expected, especially without foreplay, but the thing that really struck you, the thing that sent your mind whirling was how Angela phrased it. She called Commander Miller, Tommy.

He was handsome, Commander Miller. At least there was that. Another handmaid, Ofglen, was stuck with a 70 year old man. Several girls had commented in hushed whispers that you and Ofthomas were luck; the Miller brothers were a dream posting, comparatively. So many men were ugly, old, or cruel. Ofhim had scars from lashes on her back. Some of the wives were worse, Ofcole’s wife would starve her when her monthly cycle proved the ceremony useless. Mrs. Miller was a pain and was rude, but she’d never take anything like that into he own hands. She wanted to play the part of dutiful wife so bad. That didn’t stop her from constantly making digs at her daughter.

Mrs. Miller requested your aid in her garden once, using you to dump all her feelings. She confessed the reason you were here was her doing; Elizabeth had proven a failure in her eyes, and she wanted another child to raise, to start over. She said her father spoiled her, let her get away with to much. Commander Miller refused to physically discipline her, and Mrs. Miller was insistent that that’s what the girl needed. Commander Miller reminded her she was just a teenager, and Mrs. Miller countered that she is a woman, not a child. You were married off young and it had seemed fine. You felt like an adult. But now you look at Elizabeth and think ‘did I look that young? Did I seem that childlike?’

Mrs. Miller had expressed that she had hoped wives school would fix her, or that maybe after coming back, Riley’s influence would be good. Ellie’s friend, Riley, was 16 and was married to a man in his 20’s, both children from before who had been taken from an unworthy family. An age gap, but certainly not the worse you’d seen, certainly, but now you were near her husbands age the the idea of marrying a 16 year old…

All this to say, Commander Miller was a blessing. You’d been lying if you said you never thought of him when you masturbated. And of course you masturbated. His sweaty body all encompassing around you, brown curls falling on his face, his facial hair on your skin…

It was time for the ceremony, you and Mrs. Miller were in your respective positions, you laid up between Gina’s spread legs in her blue dress, her hand gripping your arms with your legs bent. Commander Miller emerged from the bathroom and your chest tightened at the sight of him, knowing what was coming. The pomp and circumstance had passed, the prays having been done in the living room with members of the household: You, Commander Miller, Mrs. Miller, Lisa, and the driver, Isaac. There had been a passive aggressive spat between Mrs. and Commander Miller on the idea of Elizabeth attending the prayers.

Mrs. Miller: “She needs to participate in household activities”

Commander Miller: “It’s bad enough she knows whats going on, I don’t need her to participate.”

Mrs. Miller: “She’ll be a wife soon enough herself, god-willing she’ll have a handmaid of her own!”

“God-willing she won't need to!”

Mrs. Miller scoffed. “As if God would find her worthy in her state!”

Commander Miller grew deadly calm, jaw set in a tense gaze as he stared at his wife, you and Elizabeth standing on the other side of the room. “Woman, you do not speak about her like that again, understood?”

The intensity of his eyes must have been warning enough, Gina backing down. “Yes sir.”

He straightened up. “Ellie, you are excused. Gina, drop it.”

The tension had carried over into the bedroom, the air thick with it as the reality of what was going to happen settled in. Commander Miller’s bulge was prominent even in his dark pants, having worked himself up alone before coming out here and undressing once again. Just pulling down his pants and underwear, god forbid you see him shirtless. This wasn’t for your pleasure, you filthy whore, this wasn’t even for his. This was for you to bare him and his wife a child. A son to lead the family in righteousness, or a daughter to bare more children and so on. This was a job.

You hear a spit and the distinct sound of masturbation, then a few more spitting sounds. It took everything in you to not look at him, keeping your eyes glued on the ceiling but the picture was clear in his head. The tall, broad, powerful commander furiously jerking off the the site of your body spread of before him. Was that for you? Or was he looking at his wife? He sure didn’t seem very fond of her, but there was no denying she was beautiful.

“Joel, do you really need to do that? It’s obscene.”

“Well you can’t expect her to take it dry when you can barely-”

“Joel!”

“Well unless you want me to-”

“JOEL!”

You couldn’t help it, opening your eyes to see him, his face scowling but eyes with a glint of mischief. He was fucking with her, purposefully embaressing her infront of a lowly handmaid to get back at her for what she said about Elizabeth.

When Commander Miller slid into you, you were suddenly acutely aware that this was going to be difficult. Slowly he moved inside and the inches just. Kept. Coming. Your breath hitched and you bite down on your lip trying to keep any possible sound from coming out, no gasps of pain that could be mistaken for pleasure. The stretch was unbearable by the time Joel was fully sheathed inside of you, thrusting as the tears pricked up in your eyes. It would be quick. There was no presence of needing to last, at least. Just get it done. Fill you up and hopefully you conceive. Problem was… the stretch.

It wasn’t your fault, really. It was natural, wasn’t it? Even under these circumstances. Or maybe you were a harlot, only redeemable by producing a child for a high value man. That's why you were in this position, right? You could feel yourself getting wet and you wished he would hurry up before the smell of sex and arousal fill the room, before the fucking sound became impossible to ignore. The warmth in your belly grew, tightening, the feeling of being filled so completely was just dizzying and you needed him to finish, now.

Then it happened, the orgasm hitting you so hard your eyes rollback in your head and it takes everything you have not to cry out. You can only pray Joel isn’t looking at your face as you attempt to stifle every bodily reaction as you pulse around him. Warmth floods your insides when he stills inside you, a light groan from his lips. He’s allowed to make a few sounds; he’s the man, after all. It’s supposed to feel good for him, but for you? This was wrong. This was bad, and you were going to be in a fuck ton of trouble now. Aunt Lydia never said anything about orgasming. Did the law have a specific article about this, or was it left up to the commander's discretion? You hadn’t seen Joel raise a hand to Gina yet, but you were only a week in. You open your eyes, daring to take a peak at Commander Miller in order to gauge your future.

You can see him smiling at you before tucking himself back into his pants to go clean up. Mrs. Miller instructed you to lay there for a while, bettering the chances of it taking, and left the room. When Commander Miller exited the bathroom and returned to the bed chambers, he excused you with a soft “You can go now, darl’n”

Another 2 weeks went by without incident, and it appeared Commander Miller wasn’t going to do or say anything about your embarrassing indiscretion. Angela had told you to play with yourself before the ceremony to get yourself wet, but you had been too scared of this exact scenario happening. Fat lot of good it did you, huh?

Unfortunately for everyone involved, you got your period as expected. One would think you didn’t want to get pregnant. The odds of dying in child birth had increased despite growing technology. It was the pregnancy complications and the insistence of home births even when the pregnancy was warning them not too. Gilead’s obsession with rituals meant that there was also an extensive one for childbirth and that obsession rendered many women dead. In addition to that, there’s the horror of growing a child inside you, and even if it was a healthy pregnancy and that child lives, after a period of breastfeeding you are taken away from the life you created to go to another posting.

If you produce a child and remain behaved, when you are no longer of birthing age, you get to retire in peace. Whatever that meant. You weren’t sure you entirely cared, one way or another, but the idea of the wall was scary. 3 postings, 3 years per posting, this was your window.

You often heard Elizabeth sneaking downstairs after the household went to sleep; always after Joel went down. Your room was right by the stairs, so you heard it all. God knows you aren’t sleeping.

You were bored. So bored. Bored enough to sneak downstairs after Ellie and go investigate, so you do. Slowly and carefully you go down stairs and find Commander Miller’s office, creeping up to the door to listening. You hear music. Music that was supposed to have been destroyed a decade ago, and you take a moment to enjoy the sound. Steady acoustic guitar, soft male singing.

“Can we listen to it again?” Ellie’s voice spoke from behind the door.

“After your lesson.” Commander Miller.

“UUUGGGHHH”

“I thought you wanted to learn?”

“I do…” Ellie acquiesced, and you can hear the sounds of pulling a book off a shelf and opening it. Biology. Commander Miller was teaching Ellie biology. This was unheard of, especially for a commander's daughter, a woman who was supposed to be getting married off soon. She didn’t need to learn science, to listen to ungodly music? So why was a high ranking Commander not only allowing it, but teaching her?

You move to go back upstairs where you belong, but the creak of the floor gives you away. White-hot panic, the kind where everything runs hot and the world suddenly feels funny floods your system. You freeze, hoping to God no one heard you. That goes out the window when the door flies open, Commander Miller spotting you and yanking you inside the room by the dress.

“What the hell are you doing here?!” He shouts, loud and angry and so close to you that you can smell his breath.

“Dad?” A panicked Ellie stood to the side, drawing your attention. She looked terrified, and you felt sorry for scaring the poor girl.

Joel gripped your face, fingers digging into his skin as he forced you to look at him. “Eyes on me. You don’t look at her.” Keeping your face forward, Joel turned to Ellie. “Go upstairs, I’ll take care of this.”

“But dad-”

“Ellie. I got this, you go to your room, it’ll talk to you in a bit, okay?”

Ellie nodded, going out the door and only stopped to eye you for a moment.

Joel turned back to you. “What did you hear?”

“Nothing-”

“Liar!” He screamed, fingers pressing harder into your skin.

“I heard the music! And, and some of the lesson, but I won’t say anything I swear-”

“Of course you won’t,” Joel chuckled. “Who are they going to believe? A commander and the first daughter of Gilead, or a handmaid who cums during the ceremony.” Your eyes go wide at that, the way Joel’s grip loosens but never leaves, thumb slowly beginning to trace at your cheeks. “Yeeeah, that’s right, I felt you. Little bitch in heat couldn’t help cumming on cock? Didn’t even need any build up, huh? You just take whatever's given to you. Little whore, all pent up…”

God, he looked good like this; towering over you, broad shoulders closing in on you and making it clear there was nowhere to go. When he placed his thumb at your lips, you didn’t even hesitate to take it in your mouth and begin to bob your head, eyes closing just a little. “Dirty, dirty girl…” Joel taunted. “Just need to get filled up. All that pent up slut, nowhere to go. Tell me, sweet thing… Do you think of me when you touch yourself?”

Your sucking stopped, but Joel continued moving his thumb in your mouth. “Yeah, I know you do. Get on your fucking knees.” He didn’t wait, shoving you down to your knees, his cock entering your mouth before you had a chance to think.

The stretch pried open your mouth, pulling at your chapped and dry lips. The bulbous tip hit the back of your throat and made you gag, but he wasn’t stopping.

“Dirty fucking whore, that’s how you ended up here, isn’t it? Needed to be constantly filled, your husband wasn’t enough?” He thrust into you with vigor, your sputtering sounds only spurring him on more while you breathed through your nose, you couldn’t help but whine, preening at the sensation of a dick in your mouth once again. It felt, so, so good, despite the circumstances. “Don’t you worry, I’ll fill you up alright, fill you up enough you stay full.” His pace began to falter after a few more minutes. “Fill you up with my baby, fulfill your biological destiny like the pretty little whore you are.” You wriggle, trying to get some sory of sensation between your legs as you hungrily sucked at him, desperately needing his cum inside you.

He spilled into you, salty and thick and so fucking good, you swallow down every goddamn drop.

With a hand fisted in your dress, Joel pulled you up and to your feet, shoving you back against the wall as he cleaned up. “You are going to apologize to her, and after that.” Joel was close up against you again. “You are going to keep my daughter’s name out of your fucking mouth.” His tongue flicked out to lick at the corner of your mouth and swiped his tongue over your lips. “After tonight, we on’t be wasting one more drop in your mouth. Every last bit of me goes to filling you up, but this-” He patted your stomach where his cum was heading. “Should keep you satisfied until next time.”

Until next time.

Joel pulled you upstairs and into Ellie’s room where he shoved you forward. You fold your hands in front of you and bow your head, hoping she can’t see any evidence of you being a whore for her father on your face. You doubted Joel would’ve allowed that.

“I’m sorry for intruding, Miss Miller. It won’t happen again.” You are careful not to imply you heard anything, know anything, and certainly not imply that she did anything wrong. Joel wouldn’t stand for that.

“Yeah, whatever.” Was all she replied before Joel sent you out of the room, and all you hear as the door closes is “It’s okay, baby girl. It’s handled.”

But your thoughts were swirling on something else, how turned on you were, how dominant he was, how fucking hot he is, but most important, those last few words.

Until next time.

******************

We get to the spice nice and fast ayyyyyyyyeeee

We love Joel being protective of his daughter <3

Let me know your thoughts!

Remember, reblogs spread the work, comments means the world!

@my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction @dins-riduur-anthe @morallyinept @fan-fiction-floozy @med494 @taliarose12 @flvrdoll @k-ra @sam-2me @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin @moriartyyouwhore @hereforthepedrofanfic @alwaysmicado @noisynightmarepoetry @kyloispunk @jenna-ortega @lunitareads @labyrinthofheartagrams @swimmjacket

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atmajolish · 1 year

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Hii! Could you perhaps make some obey me characters (has to include at least Satan and Solomon 💞) react to an s/o that makes bizarre jokes about their traumatic experiences, like they could hear some bad news and they just respond with "damn this hits harder than my father after he drinks" or something similar

You don't have to write this of course, and if this makes you uncomfortable, you can just ignore this ❤️

(I apologize in advance for any spelling errors and if my request wasn't specific enough!!)

i‘m showing clear favoritism for satan and i will not apologise for it. he just does something to my brain that makes me ramble for way longer than anyone should have to listen to. i hope you enjoy!

─── ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ⋅ ⋅ ───

Satan.

he isn't exactly the best when it comes to these types of things. sure he has read books where some characters make these types of jokes, however he hasn‘t really experienced it. the brothers don‘t cope like this, it's far more common for everyone to just ignore their problems instead of mentioning them

needless to say, you saying things like that will get him concerned. satan will ask if you‘re okay, if something made you relive the experience so that you feel the need to mention it

if you explain that it‘s just jokes and nothing serious, he will become slightly less concerned, although he‘s still going to check in with you whenever you make these jokes. just to be sure that everything is okay

satan will end up reading books about the human response to trauma, just to be sure it‘s really nothing to worry about. this will also end up in him becoming way too interested in psychology in general for at least a short while. if you ask, he will happily tell you all about his newfound knowledge. (he will also tell you if you don‘t ask, he just likes sharing what he read, even if it‘s things you already know.)

Solomon.

as the only fellow human, he is more than used to these types of jokes and probably even makes some himself. if you live long enough you stack up enough traumatic experiences to build character.

the first time he overhears it, he will take you aside and ask if you‘re okay and if you need someone to talk, but if you tell him that you‘re fine then he will accept it and not ask any further questions

instead it will lead him to join in with your jokes, sharing a few of his own life experiences.

as long as you‘re okay now, he will laugh along with your jokes, even if it sometimes leads to concerned glances from luke and simeon as they try to understand how these things could possibly be funny.

BONUS!

Thirteen!

when she hears you make a joke like that, she‘s going to be quite confused for a moment, before wondering if you spend too much time with solomon. maybe she should build a new trap so he stops infecting you with his…general self

once you explain to her that it‘s just your humor and has nothing to do with solomon, she becomes more accepting of the whole thing, even if it makes her wonder why a soul as bright as yours has experienced so many horrible things

thirteen adjusts surprisingly well if you give her a little time. she will not join in on the jokes, but she will just keep the conversation going instead of pausing and staring at you for a short while

she will keep this a secret, but she has definitely asked solomon what she should do, even if she hates having to do it. she just wants to be sure that it‘s really fine and just a normal thing for humans

#obey me x reader #satan x reader #solomon x reader #thirteen x reader #tw abuse #om x reader #om swd #obey me

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lynpheas · 5 months

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i have a paper to write but. i cannot stop thinking about musa and stella. their dynamic is SO underrated…

they both have such strong personalities except musa is a lot more understated and subtle while stella is more exuberant and outgoing!! but in a subversion of expectations, stella is so down to support musa being in the spotlight — like in their s2 red fountain performance where stella did backup vocals/dancing while musa sang her heart out.

they both have familial issues & come from very different backgrounds, which simultaneously threads them together through a commonality and then sets them apart. for example, they both understand somewhat unconventional family dynamics and the absence of a parent, their mothers. stella’s parents were so busy arguing and just generally being unhappy in their relationship that they overlooked stella and how they made her feel and how their actions affected her. the loss of stella’s mother in her life is something we can infer that stella has had very little room to openly discuss with her parents, and so she has all of these internalized and idealized hopes for a future that we know will never come to pass. but she’s navigating these feelings without proper support from luna and radius. similarly, after musa’s mother’s passing, musa’s father reacted to his grief without taking into account how these events affected musa. ho-boe blamed music for matlin’s passing and so he rejected it completely, imposing that will upon musa and straining their relationship because of it. musa’s only avenue of feeling close with her mother is through music, but her feelings are disregarded and so she has to navigate this relationship with music and also her late mother all on her own.

however, for stella, she is a princess and her parents are merely divorced; so, although she rarely sees her mom and her parents don’t get along, she still has the option to go see her. i think you could say, on top of needing to be charismatic and charming as a leader, stella’s exuberant personality might’ve developed as a result of her wanting more of her parents’ attention, to be seen and understood by them. i think the 4kids dub may say otherwise, but i think it’s fairly clear that musa comes from a more modest background. and contrastingly to stella, musa has completely lost her mother and so their connection is almost…spiritual? and introspective. without her father’s guidance and understanding, musa would more have to retreat into herself. still, both of them are individuals with strong senses of self—their specific familial situations have simply informed their coping strategies and the personalities they’ve developed.

with or without that background in mind, i also just love the way stella and musa’s personalities play off of each other! because of their strong personalities, they’re prone to disagreement and small clashes. musa’s more sensitive, while stella is—although well-intentioned—more thoughtless with her words. i find musa to be more measured, but perhaps equally as blunt at times. these personality differences might result in small but realistic bumps and tiffs within their friendship, but they also have a shared understanding of one another that gives their relationship a strong foundation. and again, despite musa seeming more chill and stella seeming more prone to wanting the spotlight, stella is absolutely musa’s cheerleader!

#textp #winx club #stella #musa #and i just think in terms of fic this is such a fun dynamic to write #they feel like such real teenage girls #just stella maybe saying something that rubs musa the wrong way #musa snapping a little #them just getting on each other’s nerves #but ultimately understanding each other and loving each other #and learning how to navigate the minefields of each other’s emotions and triggers #i really need to write my fucking paper good lord #BUT THEY <3 #also it’s 4am so i do not think this is coherent at all

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8um8le · 1 year

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I'm not even a big fnaf fan and yet you got me obsessed with your cyberpunk!au, your design and style is so clean and lively, and the DETAILS <3 I'm in love <3 I kept scrolling since morning through your blog, and I got a thought regarding cyber aus in general: how love between mortals and immortals is a constant race against time and grief. I mean, even with the y/n part of your universe. They will eventually start aging, or just the fragility of human y/n and the threat regarding sun/moon/8bot/eclipse's job. Given that Eclipse and 8bot already lost humans dear to them, how do they cope with the thought of loving another? Rejection, denial? I see they would push y/n away for their safety and to spare themselves pain of losing them. And even if they all fall for human y/n against any logic, I can sense the impending feeling of doom and overprotectiveness. Perhaps nightmares and unwanted memories. What do you think?

Eclipse and 8ot rambles down below <333

8ot and Eclispe had their run with humans, both reacting differently based on their circumstances. Eclipse’s human was a smart successful high status guy, who could spend the rest of his life being by his side. He taught him all the ropes. So with Eclipse’s new human, he would do his best to make sure they live a long healthy life, constantly nagging them about what’s not good for them and what’s good for them :-)))

8ot’s human was a deaf woman who taught them sign language since 8ot didn’t have a voice, they got along well. (Though they had other ways of communicating) Unfortunately she was killed by the raucous gang, which made 8ot go berserk. So they would be too protective of their human :-))

The main characters Sun and Moon are more pure when it comes to their contact with humans, they don’t casually come across them too much. It’s usually just kids from the daycare or when greeting their parents. It would be a whole new experience if a random human treated them as equal, with endless possibilities.

#cyberpunk au

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jaymesyourplaything · 1 month

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TRANSPARENCY

ver they/them is sherlock he/him mod

john he/him is johns mod.

all purple are links.

hello,, i think to start this, i will have to be very transparent. this is going to push a lot of my comfort zones, and... well, writing this is going to... be very difficult for me. i'm sorry. if i give too much leeway, some friends may be upset. if i speak at all, i fear i'm losing some automatically.

but, i wanted to speak up. push myself. my friend gave me the okay, and along with bewitched they are both giving me the courage every day. 🥺🥺🥺

i struggle with speaking up. my co-mod was always the one who, spoke for me. in my life; i am very much a wallflower. in my personal life, people don't like how i am so very willing to see the good in people, even if they hurt me. this is because i was abused and neglected started from a young age.

due to my abuse;

i have a dissociative disorder

it makes it very hard for me to interact with people around me in my day to day life. whenever i am stressed, whenever i feel i should be quiet-i was conditioned well-or if anyone so much as changes their tones, i'll be gone. it's questioning when i come back, but it's often when i'm more comfortable.

so, when someone is out of line, or otherwise mean to me, i would dissociate, and often forget about it. my caretaker once commented on how i wasn't there mentally, i didn't have the ability to hold a grudge. it was not because of a mental deformity, but the neglect i suffered.

i was only ever "real" during happy moments. i would lose focus during un-happy moments. it was easy to create false memories, especially if all i had to go on was my (caretakers) retelling of any story.

my memories, my thoughts and feelings on people, are based entirely of whatever i can remember of them at that moment, and what other's tell me about the memories/people. my reality is easy to be altered. (which is why i stepped back so long, all my thoughts are based on my partner of 10 years, childhood friends who do not interact with this website or anyone in it, or some of my friends who have been helping me correct my behavior who have all stayed out of it for their general lack of like of drama and also it helps me tremendously to interact with the world "alone" and learn how to proceed in my life/process. alone as in they don't interfere, other than advice i ask for. mostly i'm saying i purposeful stepped back from ver and bewitched -and john- anyone involved and spoke to those not involved for my opinions here. )

the best coping mechanism we found is to be extremely grounded. the last year has become the best year of our life after we became aware how severe the abuse was and why i've been the way i have. (we as in my partner and i. we have been together for 9 years now. )

this is why i struggle keeping a narrative for long. i'll lose it, i'll go through various stages of understanding, or memory loss. my narrative is based on those around me and what i see, and other things i can trust. it takes awhile, so i can gather what other's think of what's happened around me, so i can base the truth off it.

(i stayed out of this because i couldn't just, listen to everyone when this is /my/ experience. hence why i talked to my partner, or other -childhood friends not related to anyone here in this space- about such topics for so long, or other trusted friends, until i could gather an idea that isn't biased from my friends. because i trusted john, it hurt a lot for this to happen, it was hard to believe, hence dissociation and why it took so long. heughhh... )

also, yes, co-mod

i co-moded this blog once. if you know who the co-mod is, please keep it private. we have since talked and he has agreed to stay out, he's leaving me to handle the experiences on this account. he has remained quiet by my request. he now has only commented on his own experiences on his blog, only. john never knew the identity of this other person, in fact i don't think i told him my identity either. we spoke as "i" or "we".

edit: gdi pookie i said keep it private wts

my co-mod quit the fucking whore

thats a joke i don't mind they quit. poor communication, i would dissociate and he disapproved that i was continuously supporting him [john] even though i was clearly, by my own mind's definition, in discomfort talking to him. i wanted to be a good mod, keep contact with the other mods. ): i didn't like how he treated people behind the scenes, gossip and stuff. devaluing sherlock for a long time.

my friendship and thoughts on john and ver

i don't think ver is emotionally manipulative, but i didn't think john was abusive either. john has certainly shown he has been abusive since the split at least, but it suspects he could have always been abusive.

john planned replacing sherlock with his friend, from early january at least, but i suspected it back around august 2023

he said early on ver would deserve being replaced. said mine would be a better sherlock once, said he was tired of ver's sherlock, supported the idea of the other sherlocks popping up since jan but said they were also crazy and not to talk to them.

but anyway, here's wonderwall

aka my statement

there are boundaries. revealing personal information about ver, at first in private (with me, who else could he have? ) and then later in public, or messaging them after they (publicly ) told him to stop. then slander, or public harassment (public attempts to communicate, or throw accusations at, or now accuse of sending anon asks without proof -turn off anon asks then john. ) i don't know what happened in private, but publicly john has continuously escalated a situation that ver has attempted to be quiet and respectful on continuously.

i ended my friendship with john because of his continued abuse towards ver since he abruptly and without warning replaced ver.

uh , last thoughts? and a message from me

john was a mean girl who decided to fully bully and harass ver now that ver was free.

ver is just emotional and reacted to johns /empty/ threats of quitting.

which again is mean of him, empty threats, he knew he wanted to replace ver, not quit lol

since he kicked ver out and cut them off, he has continuously reached out, even after ver requested he stop. he has no even made a new account (sherlockbbc-rp blog ) so that he could interact with us (we all had to re-block him, or otherwise ignore him ) since we all have been trying to move on

he is obsessed with ver, which is weird when john is the one who wanted ver gone. ver even tried to help john every step of the way (and wanted the same respect and help. ) which john refused. i believe ver and believe john blew them off until he replaced him, since he's refused my help in similar ways countless times.

i hope ver can move on and recover, they do seem really shaken up and shy because of this event, and john continuously just, escalates. now that we've all done statements, i want to help ver move on. i want to plan and plot more interactions, i want to help cheer them up. i hope johns friends continue to watch and take care of him too, but i honestly am happy i'm not one of them now. it's stressful. i don't need to be friends with someone who puts that much thought into slandering and harassing someone and has no intentions of growing as a person and stopping that behavior. i've been trying, and i'm sure most of my friends would agree i'm doing so much better. i am proud of my improvements, and i am so very proud of ver for moving on and taking all steps i would have. i am not proud of john. i am proud of me for leaving john. my friends are proud, it was difficult for me, very very difficult.

this was difficult to write. as said, in my personal life, i am too soft, too nice. last ex, i remember we talked it out and ended with me saying (so us agreeing ) we were both too immature for the relationship. in reality they were cheating and petty lol. i.. i am often harassed for, not... speaking up, for taking blame, for ending so many things on good terms. two people i respected a lot even judged me when it took me so long to cut john out of my life. it hurt a lot. i've withdrawn a lot, since then. i am excited to move on from this chapter of my life, and continue growing as a person, from poor behavior to just being more assertive.

thank you for reading this, i... i feel no one really cares, but a close friend comforted me, and reminded me that even if no one else cares, that my friend ver appreciates me helping. i was silent so long, partially their request, some was a mutual agreement between me and my co-mod, and a lot was processing... what was going on with john. please be respectful, please be patient with me. this was my friend too. this was ver's friend once too. thank you to my friend, thank you to my continued friends for always helping me in correcting my behavior, or just remaining patient with me during this journey the last year with my own personal growth, and thank you to bewitched and ver for giving me the courage and help to speak out in the first place. i love and appreciate all of you very much.

john, please stop trying to contact me.

#jay #a scandal in tumblr #mod

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macinthecaac · 4 months

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Something I've been thinking about is the massive difference between Mark Watney and Ryland Grace when finding themselves in an "I'm going to die out here" situation. Particularly the fact that Mark Watney immediately starts worrying about his family, while Ryland Grace (as far as I remember) never brings them up throughout the entire book.

And it's strange, thinking about it. Most people being sent on a suicide mission would likely at least *think* about their family and worry about how they'll be able to cope with their passing. But when Ryland Grace is about to be thrust into space against his will, who does he think about instead? His students.

Maybe I'm just projecting, but as a person who doesn't get along with the majority of their family and had a less-than-stellar childhood, I wonder if it's possible that Ryland Grace doesn't have the best relationship with his family either. That could also explain his fear of receiving criticism and being judged, and why he loves being a teacher so much; He wants to be a safe adult in kids' lives that he never had growing up. Someone they can talk to if things are bad at home, or if they aren't feeling well. Someone who will listen, and give them the support they need if they're struggling academically.

Just think about the way that he spoke about all of his students. He refers to them as HIS KIDS. He knows them all so well, he's protective of them, and the entire reason he decided to give up his normal life to work on Stratt's Vat™️ is because he realized those kids would be the generation facing the Petrova problem head-on.

In conclusion, Ryland Grace would make an AMAZING dad and I can't imagine I'm alone in thinking that.

#project hail mary #andy weir #ryland grace #family issues #I was going to tag this with content warnings but I don't know what to tag #I think It's okay? Probably #Genuinely considered becoming a science teacher after reading project hail mary

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cookiesupplier · 4 months

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Every Rose Has It's Thorns - Part Eight

pairing: Ricky Olson x ofc (Talia)

warnings/tropes: slow burn, soulmates, strangers to enemies to lovers, betrayal, angst, fluff, smut, language, panic attack (unknown/undiagnosed). ❗PLEASE CHECK THE AUTHORS NOTE FOR THIS CHAPTER.❗

summary: In a world where soulmates inexplicably receive a tattoo that will match that of their soulmate the moment they turn eighteen years old, being famous and covered in very visible tattoos can make finding your true soulmate a questionable fate. Not that it is any easier for the soulmate in question. Thus is the fate for Ricky and Talia. Sooner or later, however, life is bound to collide, but what will happen when it does?

author’s note: This chapter includes description of a panic attack, please if you find this triggering, please skip the marked section, or this part entirely.

tags: @tearfallpixie @cncohshit @jordynyingling0219 @faceless-mirror @nyxthedestroyerofworlds @wild-child-7747 @witchyweeb34 @black-damask1999 @casangel1986

Please ask if you'd like to be tagged, to this story or in general.

Ava had been gone a little over half a week now, and Talia had been spiralling, just a little, admitting to it wasn’t easy, but she was slowly getting there. She hadn’t talked to Ava about it yet, but she was aware already that her best friend knew.. Ava had said as much, even if it was without words. Kyle and Jordan both knew, neither of them left her alone each passing day, they both checked in on her, making sure she was okay, even if it was just phone calls to chat.

Ava’s calls kept happening as well. Whether it was a random call from Ava in the morning, on her lunch break, even on the speaker in the middle of the day talking to the whole parlour yesterday. That had been a fun call, everyone had fun talking to Ava, telling her how much they missed her snarkiness and hoped she was having fun with her soulmate.

Today, Talia was calling Ava once she got home from work. She crashed on the couch, and curled up with her phone in front of her, video calling only when the screen popped up, it wasn’t Ava that came on screen. It was Vinny, and half of Ricky’s face. She swallowed a little at the sight, she hadn’t seen or really heard about him in days, and it had been, well, it had been both welcoming and had been..

It made her feel so empty too.

It took everything in Talia to stop herself from asking Ava from how he was doing. How he was coping right now.

She wanted him to be doing better, to be doing okay, but she knew better than to think he would be.

Talia doubted he’d ever forgive her for fucking up his life, but she did hope he could move on at some point, at least then he might stop hating her right. She’d really like to be able to at least be able to hold a conversation with the man, because Vinny and Ava were soulmates, and they would have to deal with each other sooner or later.

Also, it would be really nice not to go to sleep feeling like she was being ripped herself apart piece by piece a little at a time. Talia was a wreck, and what she was supposed to do about that, she had no idea right now.

“Hey Vinny, is Ava there? I’ll never hear the end of it if I miss our daily video call.. Even if it’s her fault. Especially if its her fault.”

Hearing one or both guys snort slightly as she said that she smirked, at least Ava seemed to be getting along with the guys, including Rick, okay.. She had still been worried things would be difficult with Ricky.

“I think she’s still in the shower, she should be almost done.. How are you, any cool tattoos today?”

She smiled, for a man that didn’t have any real tattoos on his person, he always liked hearing and seeing the work she did. One day she even threatened to design him one, even if he would never get it done, just to see what he thought of it, and turn it into a temporary tattoo for his skin, see how it would look on him even. Not for a while, she was still getting more of a feel for the real Vinny, and not the Vinny that she knew from the Motionless in White band version she knew, not that they were really that much different. Still, knowing someone personally, and knowing someone in the parasocial sense, were two very different things.

“A couple. You could also check out the shops insta, or even the tiktok, I think Rick has the apps accounts, don’t you Rick?”

Glancing to the other man who was trying to look like he wasn’t paying attention as he was playing with something on his own phone, but the moment she said his name, his eyes flew up from the screen to look to glare a little at her. How dare she say anything to him. How dare she mention him and bring him into the conversation on purpose.

Ignoring him was not going to get them anywhere. Treating him like he was invisible furniture was going to help.. Even if it might hurt less not to see that glare and deny the way it hurt her heart. At least she wasn’t in the same room as them. When she hung up this phone, she could go into her room, stick her face into her pillow and scream, cry, whatever it was she felt like doing.

Whatever worked tonight.

After a long, tense moment, of Ricky staring daggers at her through the video call, he finally gave in and tore his eyes away from the phone and looked back to whatever he was doing on his own, his voice low and frustrated.

“Yea, I’ll show you later.”

She let out a quick sigh, at least he hadn’t been as much of an ass to her this time, could that count as progress.. Still a bit of an ass, just, not as much of one.

Perking up hearing a door in the background, followed by a voice she knew one, she smiled brightly as Vinny handed over a phone to Ava,

“Talia, Sweetie, let me take you to my bunk so we can talk properly!”

Ricky felt like he was going utterly insane. Every day Ava was calling Talia, every single day. He couldn’t escape her even when she wasn’t even here. Not that she ever really talked about her, or even said her name, but knowing that she was calling home every day, and every time she mentioned having to call home.. Whether it was to one of those two guys, or Talia, it didn’t really matter, only one person came to mind for him, and he hated it.

Couldn’t he get a few moments of peace? When he wasn’t reminded about soulmates? When he wasn’t reminded every single day about her?

Right now, Rick was doing his very best to ignore the subject while he was playing some video games with Vin and Justin after Ava disappeared back to the bunks with her phone to talk to who he was trying to absolutely not think about. They were travelling to the next city, and they weren’t performing tonight so it wasn’t like they had anything to do anyway, so they were all just relaxing, and enjoying some downtime. Sure they were stuck on the bus travelling between towns, but it was something, and video games it was.

It was nice just playing the games with the guys, not thinking about anything else for a bit, and it worked, right until Justin got a call from his wife, and there was a joke on the phone about he was just hanging out with the soulmate guys, he was good. After all, Vinny has joined the club! Ricky stomach plummeted when he realized the way that they’d used to joke and tease. It used to be Justin and him.

“Just you an Vin.”

An awkward silence hung in the air, at least this time he didn’t snap at him, just reminded him that Ricky’s soulmate in question had been, well, fake. Grace wasn’t his soulmate, and had never been his soulmate.

“Man, come on, we all saw her tattoo in the greenroom Rick, it wasn’t fake.”

Justin spoke as he continued to play the game, they both did, only Rick’s focus on the game was slipping as his grip on the controller was tightening, and his fingers were jabbing at the buttons a bit too hard, a bit too angrily at the thought of what Justin was saying. He didn’t want to think about this. He just wanted all of this to go away, he wanted his life to go back to normal and to forget. Was that too much to ask?

“Dude, don’t break the controller.”

Vin beside him nudged his arm pushing Rick to ease up and he sighed.

“Fine, whatever. Look, sure, her tattoo wasn’t fake, so what, I have plenty of tattoos that don’t rub of. So do you Justin, but that doesn’t mean I have hundreds of soulmates out there does it?”

Glancing at his friend, raising an eyebrow waiting for him to say something, anything, silently demanding a response.

“Sure okay, maybe you can see it that way, but-”

“No buts, I don’t, I don’t give a shit about what other people think about it. I don’t care what she thinks about it, you, her friends, anyone else.. All I know is that everyone , all of it can just get fucked…”

He was starting to lose his breath. His chest was feeling tight as his heart was racing the more he talked.

“I don’t have a soulmate, I don't want a soulmate. I am DONE.

<<<<BREAK START>>>>

Ricky felt like he just couldn’t breath, and the more he tried, the worse it got, and he stood up suddenly completely helpless to it all, nothing but panic consuming him with the need to get away from there. A pressure so heavy on his chest was pressing down on him, it felt like he had a boulder just settling on his chest for absolutely no reason. Throwing the controller for the game across the way, only to stalk his way down the bus, which was thankfully clear, down to the bunk area, leaning on one of the empty ones. His fingers gripping the edge of the bunk, attempting to draw in breaths, that boulder on his chest, knowing it wasn’t real and being able to do anything about it, were two very different things, he just closed his eyes and just tried to clear his head, breathe, just break, he needed a break.

In, out, in, out, why couldn’t he catch a break.

Shit.

He wasn’t thinking about who else was back here, who had been back here earlier and he’d been avoiding, when the next thing he knew, Ava, who had been talking to Talia on the phone, was right there, sans her phone, talking to him. He wasn’t sure what she was saying, her voice sounded like it was underwater, but somehow it sounded soothing. Rick just turned his head, blinking, his eyes wide as he looked to her, not moving, but there she was, standing beside him now where he was leaning against the bunk, his arms in front of him.

“Okay, there you are, now you're with me. Rick, can you think of five things you see for me? Come on, you can do it.”

He frowned at her, what the fuck, why would he, but then she nodded earnestly, and he glanced around, five things, okay, um. A pillow, blanket, whoever's water bottle that was, a pair of shoes, and his hands. Looking back to Ava, he nodded curtly. Five things, he had five things just like she said.

“Good, good, now, four things, you can feel.”

Swallowing, focusing on the sound of her voice, and what she was asking him, four things he could touch, well, the pillow, the blanket, those were easy, right there. Moving his hand from the bunk he placed it on her shoulder for a second, and then moved it back to his chest, he could feel his heartbeat, it was racing. Nodding to her again. He could feel four things.

“Perfect. You’re doing great, Rick. Okay, now three things you can hear.”

Three things he can hear.. The ridiculous video games, the honking of horns from the traffic outside, and smiling slightly, the hiss of the brakes of the bus as they drove. That one he would have thought would be harder. Taking in a deeper breath, his breathing was getting easier, and Ava took that as a cue to keep going,

“Two things you can smell.”

“Smell? Ah,”

He took in another breath, this time not just to breath but to focus on what he could actually smell around him, his senses, that sense was different, more nuanced in a way. Sure he used it every day, but being asked to name two right his second, he wouldn’t have thought of it, closing his eyes as he focused, and letting things hit him,

“coffee…”

In the bus, he could always smell coffee from that machine, it was almost always running for someone. Pausing.. His eyes open as he glanced over towards Ava,

“Your shower wash.” She hadn’t been out of the shower long, that felt rude, but in the moment, the way he felt, Rick was beyond rude at this point, and way Ava looked to him with a small smile and a nod, she was okay.. That was two things.

“Okay, lastly, one you can taste.”

Raising an eyebrow, taste, without thinking he swallowed, he could barely taste his coffee from earlier, but it was so faint and stale on the back of his tongue it made him feel kind of sick. Maybe a fresh cup would help.

“Well, we can go make ourselves some coffee, how about that?”

Ava just laughed slightly, coffee of all things, a stimulant for someone who had just gone through that.

“Maybe some tea would be more calming? I think your stress levels are a bit high considering you just had well, I don’t know if it was an anxiety attack or a panic attack, but it was something.”

Rick took in a deep shuddering breath, slowly nodding, he felt so wrung out and trying to pull himself together, not just now but each day that passed lately was starting to take its toll. Tour could weigh them down near the end sure, but this time, felt so much worse

<<<<BREAK OVER>>>>

Standing straight from leaning on the bunk, he did feel much better thanks to her talking him through that though, he felt lighter than he had in days.

“I, Thank you.. Ava, for that. I mean, you didn’t have to help me. I know I haven’t been that kind to you, and I’m sorry, I just-”

“I get it, you’re important to Vinny, and I wouldn’t stand by and watch someone suffer.”

What she didn’t say was that he was also important to Talia, whether he wanted to accept that or not, whether either of them wanted to accept that right now or not.

“And, apology accepted.”

Ricky chuckled slightly, weakly, just feeling like he needed to sit down.

“Right, what was that, by the way?”

Ava just smiled slowly, glancing down to her hands before back up to him, remembering the times she’d not been doing so well after her parents died and needed help herself, who had been the one to help her through it.

“It’s an anxiety grounding technique, I think there are different versions I guess, but it works great for anxiety and stress. Talia taught it to me.”

Rick couldn’t help the way he tensed up a little hearing that, he didn’t mean to, but of course, it was her, it always came back to her. Nothing was free of her, nothing.

#motionless in white #miw #ricky olson #ricky horror #ricky olson fanfiction #ricky olson x ofc #original female character #soulmates #vinny mauro #fanfiction #miw band #rick olson #ricky horror olson #soulmate au #soulmate #tattoos #ricky olson fanfic #vinny mauro fanfic #fic: every rose has its thorns

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pink-apollo · 2 years

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Cod ghost HC’S if ya want like romantic or how the treat their S/O and can they be female :)

Figured this would be the perfect time since mw2 is being released💕

Surprise guest roach💕💕

Headcanons of roach and ghost with their s/o

Ghost🖤

🖤When it comes to being in a relationship with Simon, he is rather quite the gentlemen as well as loving partner. No, he is not the perfect partner. Simone knows that some days are not always the best, but that doesn't stop him from loving you and making sure that you know you are loved. There are many things about Simone that even surprise himself the longer he's with you. How he reaches out for your affection when he's known to be up tight and stiff. He lets loose a bit and finds comfort in your presence. He also seeks validation from you in the smallest of ways and finds it endearing when you pick up on it and set his mind at ease😌

🖤Simone is man with many thoughts that tend to keep him up at night. He of course feels bad when you stay up with him to make sure he falls asleep first. He's a grown man and can take care of himself, but he can't help but admit that he loves it when you tell him you're right there, that you love him, and give gentle kisses along his cheek and knuckles. The fact that you even make tea for him to settle his mind, makes a tear bring to his eye. PTSD isn't a joke and loves how you try to find way to help him keep calm when an episode is beginning to show or just ended. He knows that you're not a therapist and doesn't treat you as one, but adores that you sit there and find ways to help him cope and find healthy outlets to keep him occupied

🖤Not a day goes by that he smiles when his eyes lay upon you. He'll never understand how you chose him of all the people on this planet, but you did and he is living for it everyday. For a long while he thought he wasn't capable of giving love as well as receiving it, although that is entirely false. Every morning when he wakes up he always says I love you. He always feels as if he needs to let his partner know that they are valid and cherished no matter what lies ahead

Roach💙

💙3 words. High school sweetheart. And no I don’t mean the cringe aspect of it. I mean the part where everyday it feels like you’re falling in love all over again, the cheesey gifts because it reminds the both of you of one another. Nothing ever goes to plan, spur of the moment kinda dating life. Sometimes that means staying up at 4am talking about what goes on in space to then going out skating because it felt like the right thing on a nice day. There’s always something going on.

💙 Even though you’ve both been dating, he still gets shy when you just want to go on typical dates like out to lunch or even the movies. Just constant butterflies all around because he’s just in awe

💙Attack snuggles? Attack snuggles. Whenever you’re relaxing on the couch Gary sometimes will fling himself on top of you, taking your arms to keep them still before getting himself comfortable and just laying there soaking up the closeness. Sure he can be a ball of awkwardness and unsure how to say what he wants, but does anything ever go to plan? No...not really. It’s Gary

💙Did I also mention picking you up? He adores picking you up and having you tighten yourself around him, squeaking due to the surprise lift. He hates when you talk down to yourself and finds ways to prove you wrong such as picking you up. If it makes you happy then that’s what he will do. In general though he loves picking you up and placing you on the counter to receive dozens of kisses as you cradle his face in your hands

#Simon ghost riley #simon riley x reader #roach x reader #Modern warfare #mw remastered #mw2 #mw #Headcanons #Roach headcanons #Simon riley headcanons

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sun-undone · 1 year

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the cinematography in the first Jiara confrontation scene in 3x04 is so fucking good and i just need to rant about it for a bit. specifically the repeated camera angle that frames Jiara through the broken porch screen.

as some very important context, the screen was broken back in 1x07 when JJ tried to give the stolen 25k to Luke to pay for his restitution. JJ and Luke got into a pretty brutal fight that ended with them crashing through the screen and JJ almost killing Luke with a wrench in pretty much the same spot that Jiara is standing during their conversation in this 3x04 scene. the ghosts of that confrontation and all that trauma from Luke in general are ever-present in this scene and inform so much of JJ's reaction throughout the scene, and i think this continued camera angle through the broken screen is clear symbolism of that.

btw the theme of every post i ever make could be "i might be reading into everything way too much" but i'd like to think that these camerawork decisions were meaningful, so i'm running with the assumption that they were

so the first time we see this angle is right after Kie tells JJ that Big John is alive:

they're both clearly happy about the news, it's the lightest part of the scene by a landslide, and yet we get this angle reminding us of JJ's broken home and family life, specifically with his own father. so even though JJ is smiling about Big John being alive and John B being reunited with him, this angle portrays maybe some internal feelings of jealousy or grief for his own situation or even a bit of foreshadowing that Big John may not be good for John B, which this episode absolutely starts to show us.

the second instance of this angle is when Kie starts to shift the conversation from Big John and the treasure to how she wanted to check on JJ:

i LOVE how they're both framed so perfectly in the open part of the screen, it really symbolizes how Kie has noticed JJ pulling back and is actively trying to show him that she's gonna be there for him no matter what. they're literally positioned together in this symbolic open wound of JJ's.

the third and fourth times that we see this angle are after JJ has pulled away from the second almost kiss with Kie and is rattling off all the reasons why they could never work out:

he even calls direct attention to the porch screen and everything that it and the house in general represents for him when he throws an empty beer can (which is also incredibly fitting) through the hole. the angle lingers throughout this portion because he feels so trapped in his history and his reputation and his trauma, and he's desperately trying to push Kie away cause he's convinced himself so deeply that he doesn't deserve the love that she's offering. the ghost of Luke calling him a worthless piece of shit (and probably countless other things throughout his life) is kind of holding him hostage here, and the angle persisting portrays that feeling of believing something for so long that it becomes the only thing you know. it’s literally and metaphorically framing his view of himself through the trauma he’s experienced. all of that baggage is always clouding the edges of his self-image, just like the porch screen is framing these shots.

as JJ goes on to ask why Kie should even care about him and his shitty situation, we continue to get the angle. he's still self-destructing as well as taking his anger out on the trash in the yard, turning his back to Kie as he insists that she doesn't (shouldn't) care about him, but she continues to bridge the gap between them, once again moving to place herself firmly inside that symbolic open wound right along with him.

the final time we get this angle is when JJ has decided to remove himself from the situation because Kie won't take his bait of trying to push her away and it's just become too much for him:

i definitely think that this reflex of his to run away from difficult conversations is an unhealthy coping mechanism caused by the abuse that he's suffered (and we've consistently seen examples of him shutting down emotional shit and self-isolating throughout the series so far). his inability to comprehend how anyone but especially Kie could love him and have a desire to help him unconditionally is also absolutely a side-effect of his trauma and abandonment issues, so it makes perfect sense for this moment to also be framed through that broken porch screen. it's reminding us exactly where this reaction comes from. if anyone watching was wondering "why is JJ acting like this??? what's his problem????" then hopefully they can realize that they've got their answer from the very composition of this shot.

this is kind of a mess, my brain has really not been working very well recently but i hope it makes some kind of sense. basically i love these shots and they make me incredibly emotional because of how weighty they are. luke wasn't in this season at all but his presence was very much felt. that is all

#jiara #obx3 #outer banks #jj maybank #kiara carrera

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senkusphone · 4 months

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Dr. Stone chapter 3D trivia post

Hello, um. I hope yall had a pleasant solstice celebration of your choice- I've been pondering whether what we just saw merits a triva post, but let's try to squeeze some for the sake of completion, shall we?

Check out also my trivia posts for chapters 1D and 2D.

They're the same picture.

It took me way too long to notice what was off in this cover, it seems to be nothing but an aesthetic choice. Other than these off colors, this specific suika melon design first appeared during the Treasure island arc, right after Ryusui punted her off the Perseus.

To directly quote what I wrote at one time on the wiki:

Too bad, the ship Chelsea shows up in is not the Perseus D. Monkey from chapter 214 (which itself is a One Piece reference, as Boichi is a big fan).

Interesting that we get a nearly identical shot, instead of Kohaku standing behind her, it's Ruri and Matsukaze.

This posture done my Matsukaze is called Namaste (with other names such as Namaskar), which is used both as a greeting and as an indication of reverence all over the southern parts of Asia, along with other similar gestures. I know this is familiar to many myself included but I had never looked into the deeper details until now.

Figurines showing this pose have been excavated from the Indus valley civilization dating to between 2700 and 2100 BCE, making this piece of cultural heritage at least 7800 years old by the time of this panel.

Xeno has clearly had his hand in the architecture of the Japan side of the KoS, with some new constructions resembling his own Evil Disneyland back home.

Hold back yer tears

Kaseki has lived well. It's hard to tell how old he is now, he lived longer than the timeline's consistency thats for sure, I blame time travel.

At the time Taiju got wed, he was around 70 years old.

Kaseki and Chrome go back way further than the KoS, the fanbook tells us that Kaseki helped Chrome build his shed when he was just a boy.

Feel your heart a bit shakey? hang on there, we now get to talk about whyman's sorrow, and a small observation that I've made

Whyman can have emotions, the circuits that process that can be switched on and off, but the fact that a message can, or needs to be "left" for themselves, as well as his farewell for all eternity, has an interesting implication: once switched off, whyman loses the recollection of any experience they had in the meantime. These circuits allow whyman to feel, and also to then forget. This is useful, as emotions help them survive, but forgetting prevents the emotional baggage from growing infinitely over a virtually immortal life.

"If we remembered every single parting person, it would only be a few generations before the sorrow would pile up to the point it became unbearable. Maybe it is a blessing to forget. Forgetting allows us to get even. Forget sorrows as new ones replace them. Life can go on, if tragically. No accumulating loss that would one day make everyone struggle to survive and eventually pass on; though that last thing does also sound very much like today."

(10B points to the ~2 people who know where this quote is from, I digress)

So that's cool, and heartbreaking, but so what, does it connect to anything we've seen before?

Well...

In ch. 232 we see that Whyman does not know what created them.

How could that be, if they can remember things over deep time?

Maybe it is that Whyman chose to forget their creators, and everything they felt about them. Beings that they may even have loved in the deep deep past, and could not cope with yearning for.

The blonde, bangs & ponytail lineage.

The village graveyard. Last time we saw it, Byakuya's gravestone was opened to reveal the glass record.

A lot of recognizable headstones are still up now, some appear to have moved.

Other headstones might be gone or be different... The one with four dots that was there originally can't be seen in this new shot but it can be seen later in the chapter.

Also, I hate to break this to you, but there's more headstones now than there were before.

I counted 45 in the original shot, 50 in the new one, not including any that Chelsea and Senku may be covering. Granted this is likely just an oversight.

(I should mention that in order for them to match bottom to bottom, the top image is flipped horizontally).

(omg look at the babiesss)

What Xeno is telling Chrome is that if whyman went and altered their own past, then what they are seeing currently is the result of that, since whatever changes they made, are in the past after all.

They already happened and they are part of the timeline that leads them to where they are now.

Assuming they actually found Byakuya (or a petrified time traveler) means that either whyman created some sort of causal loop that is self sustaining (ie, the ramifications of the changes in the past include whyman going back to do them in the first place), or more in line with the many worlds hypothesis, that going back to the past and changing it creates a new parallel timeline where the repercussions of that happen, with no effect in the first one.

In the latter case it means the timeline we see now was altered by the whyman from a parallel universe.

The stone axe is a bit dissonant with where they are, technologically speaking, yes? Thing is, that's the one Senku took to the moon with him.

He's had it since chapter 1.

A few people I've seen mystified about this structure they unearthed at the cementery:

This is a collapsed building just like the structures that the Tsukasa empire occupied.

(shoutout to that guy about to die in the back)

Interestingly, this means that Ishigami Village is established on top of a once urban area.

I am always pumped for any extra bits of village lore I can get.

Did Suika's handwriting trigger your AI generated image senses? it did for me.

We were bamboozled again. If it ends up happening it's gonna be like the tale of the wolf. The moment we stop taking it seriously, Inagaki is gonna smack us across the head with it.

We were actually preparing for the poop on a stick to hit the f.a.a.n on discord. What do I make about the ending? I don't know, I got no big analysis this time around but I believe it's very likely we'll see more at some point.

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yesiknowimshort · 1 year

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looking at the fanon from canon with tim drake

(to the best of my own knowledge; take with a grain of salt; i’m open to discussion and disagreement; we can take this like an english lit class analysis)

this is inspired by discussions with @boredandboredmind about misconstrued info with jason and tim on their own posts about it.

also do not take this as hate to tim fic writers, you’re amazing and you best believe i’m checking the tim x reader tag constantly. i just want to be able to help give you easy access to half-canon-compliant info, and you can choose to take it or leave it.

and especially if you only know tim through online media (which is always valid and i’ll hear no argument!), it can be hard to differentiate between what it is “out of character, completely fanon” behaviour, and what is actually plausible.

RELATIONSHIPS

with his dad

tim’s relationship with his dad is extremely complicated. they both loved each other… but both of his parents had a very different way of showing their love to what tim needed.

for the majority of his life, his mother and father were super neglectful of him and his interests, which of course is how we had nine year old tim drake running around figuring out people’s identities and tryna convince nightwing to go back to batman bc tim said batman wouldn’t cope without a robin, as if he knew them personally.

bruce generally disapproved of tim being left alone while his parents were on business trips, so he looked out for tim a lot during those times.

after the death of tim’s mother, his father was all moody for a bit bc his company had gone to shit… oh and his wife died. anyway he was acting like mr crabs when he loses his money for a while until his physiotherapist dana winters was like “yo get a hold of your life man”. so jack attempted to reconnect with his son… but tim was already deep in the mantle of robin and hanging out with bruce wayne.

tim was a little reluctant at first but after a while he did really appreciate his dad trying to be a dad for once… but it conflicted with the life he had already made for himself.

tim was sneaking out to do hero work, skipping school, coming home in the early hours beat and bruised, being snarky and angsty to his dad, super secretive; basically coming off as a reckless hooligan teenager (even tho he really wasn’t) which made jack incredibly angry at tim a lot of the time, causing them to have a lot of fights.

jack was also super insecure as his position as tim’s dad as he felt inferior to the relationship tim had built with bruce.

so one day while tim was out, jack raided tim’s bedroom (10/10 parenting skills there, well done jack) which dana winters was horrified by and actually sided with tim when tim came home and blew up at his dad -anyway jack found out tim was robin.

he stormed to bruce and was like “fuck you and fuck my son’s role as robin. he’s going to boarding school”.

long story short, tim resumes the mantle of robin and his dad deals with it and they begin to really get along again, like a true father and son… and then his dad is murdered. tim finds him and is distraught, and that’s when we get this classic image of tim and bruce:

(it’s horrible obviously but i love this illustration so much. the way tim’s half in and out of the robin gear, the single eye you can see, the way he’s half collapsed over his father’s body and clinging to bruce for dear life) anyway then tim goes into the care of bruce wayne.

with bruce

lemme start of by saying: tim would only ever use the wayne name for business means as future ceo/controlling shareholder of W.E.

tim will always be a drake.

he quite literally made up a fake uncle so he wouldn’t get adopted by bruce, even though bruce really wanted to adopt him. not only that- he went as far as to forge a new will including this fictional uncle to avoid being bruce’s son

he struggled a lot with bruce’s “affection” after his father’s death since he never saw bruce as a father beforehand, only ever as a mentor. and of course, up until later in his robin career, he wasn’t even an orphan. he still technically wasn’t since dana winters ended up marrying his dad and becoming his step-mum, but she’s basically forgotten sadly.

he also consistently makes a point to make sure people know he made himself robin, and it wasn’t batman’s choice at all.

he appreciates bruce of course, but it’s more on an intellectual and emotional level than anything else. tim came from money (albeit, new money), and even though his parents' company basically died with his father there would’ve been some amount of inheritance money. not to mention without a shadow of a doubt, he would’ve had an account his parents had been saving for him.

living in another manor house and working around international companies and important people, wouldn’t be too different from what his life would’ve become had his parents not died.

tim would appreciate bruce not for the life he gave him, but simply because of bruce being intellectually stimulating for him. remember; tim sees the life he has as the life he made.

he reminds me of damian in the fact that both of them would struggle with dealing with people who bored them, people who couldn’t offer them anything.

anyway bruce = respected equal, bruce ≠ tim’s new dad.

with jason and damian

boom. all you need to know.

nah but seriously...

jason attacked tim in the tt tower when he came back to life but can you really blame him? he was replaced, and it made sense for him to come after tim since as we know, tim forced himself into the role and did, technically, steal jason’s spot before bruce realistically would’ve replaced him.

but they never held that grudge throughout jason’s reintegration into the family. of course they’d have sibling fights (note that tim doesn’t think of any of his adoptive brothers as real brothers; but jason is closest to), but a little roughhousing is normal. i’m the eldest of 6 brothers and believe me, we fight all the time. literally yesterday one of them and i bit each other while fighting (if you don’t think damian and tim would do that, you’re kidding yourself). but we love each other, and if anything happened we’d jump to each other's defence.

moving onto damian...

the way tim views damian is very telling of tim’s worldview and childhood. when damian arrived, tim demanded that regardless of being batman’s son or not, damian must work to earn the love and respect of bruce, “like everybody else” he had said. clear projection from tim here, since up until dami, tim was the only one who wasn’t “wanted” per se, and also tim’s had to work for people’s affection and attention his entire life. look at his parents; they were the half-arsed “that’s great honey” and then back to their phone call type of people (well we know where tim gets his steadfast work ethic from).

anyway, tim finally had the spotlight on him for a while only to have it turned for some little genetic abnormality.

tim’s suffering from the “been the only/youngest child for too long” phenomenon; they do not believe there is room enough in one's heart for more unconditional love. it’s quite sad if you think about it; he was in his mid-late teens by this point.

tim was quite patronising of damian when they were introduced, but he quickly pulled the “i’m just messing with you” card and did try to fix it, but stubborn-as-tim damian just started to preach his favourite “i’ll inherit everything without even trying” play. this obviously pissed off tim to no end. it seemed damian knew the perfect way to get under his skin, and it was putting tim even more on edge. it made him feel insecure in his place with bruce. for the first time tim didn’t think he was gonna be able to get his way easily.

eventually though, batman assures tim that damian being his biological son doesn’t change anything that he has with tim, and that tim doesn’t have to prove anything to him.

yes, if you look up tim and damian, you can see that damian has done some horrible things to tim and the two have very thin patience for each other, but that’s simply because they both understand the perfect ways to piss each other off. it’s just so easy for the both of them that they can’t help themselves.

i also will say that damian views the relationship as much more “mortal enemies” than tim does, but he is a child several years younger than tim, so it’s natural for him to view it as a bigger deal than tim.

all in all, jason and tim, and tim and damian are simply just brothers, and if you have more than two siblings, i’m sure you know as much as we deny it, everyone had a favourite and a least favourite sibling -it’s natural. for tim, his favourite is jason, and his least just happens to be damian.

just like damian’s favourite is dick, and least favourite happens to also be tim.

with stephanie

(now i don’t know as much about steph as i do for tim so feel free to correct me)

stephanie brown got into the hero scene by being the best little shit i’ve ever heard of and messing up her villain dad’s plans. her dad was cluemaster, a friend of the riddler, and she would literally just show up and spoil their plans in annoying ways (hence her name; spoiler).

she was tim drake’s girlfriend -it’s important to note that she wasn’t robin’s. she had no clue about his double life and broke up with him because she thought he was being unfaithful (fair enough).

when tim’s dad took robin away from him, steph stepped up to the plate with a made up robin costume and (like tim) demanded to be the replacement.

her 71 days in the spotlight as the first female robin ended in a couple different ways (thanks comics for making it hard). bruce dismissed her for his belief that she couldn’t follow orders, but he also didn’t believe that she could live up to tim... ouch. he didn’t even approve of her as his partner until she was killed. oh god here we go again...

i personally don’t acknowledge that she died. just- nope. i always look at it as wrong place, wrong time for steph. she could’ve been a great robin, but tim left massive fucking shoes to fill, and i reckon bruce was looking for any little reason to fire her -disobeying one order to not involve herself in a fight just happened to be the perfect opportunity (according to bruce). not to mention steph (and this isn’t necessarily a wrong thing) was undisciplined in hero-ing.

not to say tim was straight-laced and serious, more that him being at an equal mental level to bruce, and the both of them having built strong trust in each other, gave him a lot more leeway to do what he wanted and have the means to back up his actions.

ORIGINS OF POPULAR FANON

obviously i’ll never know exactly where something came from. this is more my speculation and attempt and supplying the headcanons with canonical evidence or debunking them.

where does “tim is a sickly boi” come from?

his lack of a spleen.

i’m not sure if most people now know that’s the reason why, but that’s gotta be how it started.

without a spleen, our body's other organs like the liver can take over many of the spleen's functions. you'll still be able to cope with most infections but there's a heightened risk that a serious infection will develop quickly, especially from certain bacteria and parasites like malaria.

if he got on antibiotics and rested when he started to feel ill, he’d be fine, but tim would never remember to take antibiotics and gods forbid he let himself rest so... he’s working until his body forces him to take a break.

mimi approved fanon 👍

where does “tim doesn’t care for himself” come from?

he’s a stubborn person. people don’t emphasise this enough. usually, people just use the motivation of depression (which, fair, it could be included in it). however, he will literally do whatever the fuck he wants because he’s tim fucking drake and that's all the excuse he feels he needs. like he is prepared to sacrifice everything *cough cough* himself to see his plan go through.

he’s also stubborn in his need to prove himself as we know. as a self-appointed robin; his mantle had felt fragile to him. not to mention damian made his grand appearance to push tim into that sweet sweet middle child category.

and as we already know, his dad also forcefully took the mantle from him and stopped him from seeing bruce. every time things start to go well for tim... it all seems to go to shit.

this in turn led to the fanon of ‘chronic perfectionism to the point of halting self-care in order to complete x, y z to prove himself’.

he also canonically doesn’t care much for sleep; in teen titans when superboy finds him awake tim just goes “it’s only three, i’m checking my emails”.

mimi approved fanon 👍.

where does “tim’s a coffee addict” come from?

he actually is only ever depicted drinking/buying coffee like 3 times (i don’t know for sure, please correct me if it’s more/less).

it ties in well with the previous point; tim’s coffee addiction is a way to justify how he can still function when he’s on 5 minutes of sleep, battered and bruised and still able to kick arse and be intelligent.

mimi approved fanon 👍

where does “tim have abandonment issues” come from?

his mum dies and he loses how his dad used to be.

he gains a better version of his dad and then his dad acts like an arsehole.

his dad gets better again and then his dad dies.

he had steph and then she left him because he just couldn’t explain who he was.

he gets bruce and then damian shows up.

he gets bruce back and then bruce dies, and nobody believes him when he says he’s alive.

yeah... it makes sense.

would be mimi-approved fanon, but i’ve never like the way i’ve seen it portrayed in fanon.

i see a lot in fics he does the “i’m pushing you away first to protect us both” and i just don’t personally agree with the depiction. call me petty but that’s my thoughts.

where does the perception that tim’s the soft one come from?

no fucking clue honestly.

mans blinded deathstroke’s (/jericho, hard to explain) good eye on purpose while delivering a one liner about fighting blind, and then told the man he just fully blinded that he agreed with deathstroke that he (tim) could be vicious when he had to be.

that one-on-one moment in the teen titans comic is demonstration enough of tim being the opposite of the soft one. none of the robins are soft. if we’re going off who’s the most “sensitive”, then it’d be dick or damian -those two have the shortest fuse.

tim blinded someone by throwing his fucking birdarang at the guy’s one good eye and was sure enough and committed enough to what he planned to do that he had the precision to make sure not to take the eye out completely -only debilitate him. that’s some calculated callousness right there.

he also boasted to the teen titans about lying to batman, after he just lied to starfire about staying put in a fight (and his lie used that ‘goody two shoes’ perception of himself; he’s self-aware of how he can come off)… and then he broke his friends out of the tt tower by cutting glass in the shape of a bat. dudes cocky as.

not to mention he literally stalked batman and ran around solving murders and dropping off the evidence to gordon before even being a robin. he was on the CIA’s watch list for crying out loud.

tim is extremely underestimated. to the point where (as @forcesofnatureunleashed accurately described) this “uwu” version of tim has taken over the fandom and made him out to seem like a mega wimp and a quiet tortured soul.

i’m not dismissing the shit he’s actually gone through, i’m just saying he’s gone through enough that you don’t need to make up that he was berated by his dad, can’t talk about his pain, and relies on his tech, when he’s quiet literally the best martial artist in the family and highly respected by ra’s al ghul.

you don’t just get respected by ra’s al ghul; especially if you were an overly sensitive, shaky-knee-ed, spineless, weakling.

STRONGLY mimi disapproved fanon 👎

#respect for tim drake #tim drake #red robin #dc comics #batboys #batfamily #headcanon #dc headcanon #fanon #canon #tim drake x reader

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