counterpoint
cyberhanami day 5: "Words That We Couldn't Say"
content warning: a dash of internal homophobia
Johnny Silverhand/Kerry Eurodyne
summary: Johnny is working on some new material.
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When people said That’s our song! they meant it like it was something tangible, one single theme symbolizing love and devotion and whatever other corny romantic shit they could think of. Like the essence of the thing could be covered by just one song that they could dance to when it came on the radio. Like it was something anyone else could hear and understand. Like it was something someone else could sing.
The thing with Kerry was he wrote songs. They both did. Someone else’s song wasn’t going to cut it. But their catalog didn’t exactly lend itself to the kind of feelings you could build anything on– not that their relationship was like that, which was to say it wasn’t anything like what he had with Rogue (had had with Rogue). Not that Rogue was the kind of chick who was remotely interested in having a song– he could only imagine what she would have said if he had ever suggested it. Called him a self-interested narcissistic rockerboy, probably.
“I was thinking about a new piece,” Johnny said. “Something instrumental.”
“Instrumental?” Kerry repeated, brow furrowing as he finished the last stroke of black polish on Johnny’s thumb. He refreshed the brush to start on the index finger, the polish cool and heavy. “Not really your style.”
“My style is whatever I say it is,” Johnny replied, irritated. “You’re the one always saying we should shake things up.”
“Shake things up, sure, but instrumental–“ Kerry trailed off thoughtfully, but then his expression soured, lips pursed in a frown. “You never listen to a damn thing I suggest, so why’s this coming up all of a sudden?”
“Jesus, forget it.” Johnny almost tugged his hand away, but he could never get it to look decent when he did it himself. “What’s got you so pissy?”
“For fuck’s sake, I’m not pissy, I’m just asking a question.” Kerry sighed as he wiped away at the thin line of polish he’d gotten onto Johnny’s fingertip. “Fine. Let’s do it.”
“Don’t strain yourself with enthusiasm.”
“Fuck you.” Kerry’s response was reflexive, like punctuation.
He finished the pinky nail– smooth and steady on the final pass, and after he’d taken a moment to admire his work he released Johnny’s hand. Kerry’s own nails were starting to chip, but he did his himself, or else Denny helped. Johnny’s contribution to his wardrobe started and ended with the pair of leather pants hanging a little loose around his hips.
“What have you got so far?” Kerry asked, rising from his chair just long enough to find his guitar and settle back down with it in his lap. Johnny wiggled his freshly painted fingers. “Oh, right, well you can play it for me when they’re dry. But you gotta give me something to work with.”
“Been tooling around with a melody,” he said, rearranging himself more comfortably with his boots up on the table now that his hand was free. “It needs some sort of counter melody though– I was thinking of a sort of a give and take between them. Like a struggle.”
“Or a battle,” Kerry said, interest piqued. He picked out a few notes while he chewed on the idea, which melded into the infamous Charge! melody. His smile was subtle, but the eagerness in his dark eyes gave him away.
“Yeah,” Johnny said. “Kind of like a battle.”
“Good and evil,” Kerry suggested. “The underdog comes out on top at the end.”
Johnny opened his mouth and then shut it. “Yeah,” he said, picking at the edge of one cuticle with his thumbnail and smudging the polish. “A classic.”
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I can't believe how many haters Scott still has. I saw your last reblog with his interview and there's people saying horrible things about it. 4 years and they still hate him, some are saying that people should bully him and his family until he disappears again. I love him but seeing things about him always make me sad because I know people will show up out of nowhere to say he's the worst person on earth. Everyone has haters but the impression I get on social media, mainly here and twitter, is that he has more haters than fans, I can't search his name without being drowned in a wave of haters. It's so difficult for me to deal with it. I admire you for still being here, truly.
Truthfully I don't see much of anything anymore because I am not actively looking but I don't doubt everything you've said.
Truly its sad that people are still harping on this 5 years later - I mean literally everyone has moved on except this fandom. And the fact that both VM have moved on to different careers and families is just continued proof that every single person who came forth with 'a source or a close friend, or a friend who lives near scotts cousins uncles kid' - were all full of shit. Not a truth was uttered but so easily believed.
VM stuck to their plans and this fandom is still fucking pressed about it. As much as the back end and early months of 2018-2019 were hard and weird to deal with, nothing that VM did in that time has warranted even a fraction of the continued hate that they both get. This fandom never understood how to separate their expectations from reality and it still fucking shows.
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