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ladylooch · 1 month

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Our Little Family [Miles Wood] Chapter 20- Meet The New Baby Woody

From B: I know we have some new followers around here! Yay and welcome! So I wanted to give a quick re-introduction to Little Family! It's a blog submission series by our lovely 👢 anon! I do not write this series. I am as much of a fan as the rest of you! This series is also completely independent of Shot In the Dark. KK enjoy!! 🍿

A/N from 👢 anon: Hi guys, it's been too long. I'm here with another update from little family. After this chapter, there is going to be 5 left and we will be closing the little family chapters.

Oh yeah, we have some smut here too.

Since the moment you told Miles that you are pregnant, things changed. He was the perfect partner and dad. When he was home, he took care of you and Lily. So you could have alone time, he knows it can be a lot being pregnant and your baby hitting 2 years old.

Every night that Miles is home, he's rubbing lotion and oil on your bump. Because he loves touching you, knowing that you're carrying his baby and the baby likes his touch too.

You're doing your best to give Lily lots of love. Let her be the baby, too. It's an adjustment, but it's amazing. You're not going to lie, your favorites moments are when she crawls into bed with you and lies on the bump talking to her sibiling.

All your appointments are around Miles' schedule. He wants to be there for you and the baby. Not that he didn't do that for you and Lily before. You're having more happy moments during this pregnancy because Miles is loving you, too. He's your partner and husband now, before he was basically just Lily's dad. You guys had fun, but not like this.

Finding out that you guys are having another girl makes him cry. And he doesn't cry much. Seeing Miles getting more emotional makes you emotional too, more than usual. That's on the hormones.

The first time she kicked was just perfection. All three of you were cuddling and watching a movie. Both Miles and Lily were lying on the bump. And then she kicked, Miles looked at you with teary eyes and a big smile on his lips. Lily asked what happened. And you explained that her baby sister said hi. It made her so happy. Lily kissed the bump and said hi back. You know you're lucky.

Sedona for babymoon was perfect. You and Miles had a really good time together. It was something that you guys needed. Having that alone time and connection was amazing. But getting home to Lily saying that she missed you was the best. It made you emotional talking to Miles later.

Miles' season ended short again, but this time he was down for a day or two and then he decided that he was going to enjoy all his girls.

……

The day finally comes, and your water breaks in the middle of the night. Miles was asleep, and you had to basically shake him to wake up.

As much you love his sleepy look, this time you need him to move his ass because you're going to be in pain soon. And you would like some meds.

You groan when the first contraction happens.

“Miles, for the love of God. My water just broke.” Miles blinks at you a few times before his brain catches up.

He curses getting up, he helps you get changed, and he goes to wake his parents. To let them know what is happening. He's so frantic because last time he was on the road.

You need to say goodbye to your baby before you go. Miles was preparing her for this moment, letting her know that maybe mommy and daddy would leave without her knowing, but grandma and grandpa would be there with her. And they're going to come back with her baby sister.

You only show that you're in pain when it's just you and Miles. The whole drive to the hospital was painful. Miles had to pay attention to your contractions while driving.

When you guys got to the hospital, Miles stayed downstairs admitting you while you went to your room. By the time he gets there, you are already in pain meds. They make you a little happier.

But then you're in pain again. Miles is by your side the whole time. You get him a cot so he can take a nap. Even if he doesn't want to. He wants to stay up with you.

You're in labor for more than 6 hours. Your doctor comes in to check you, and sees if it's time. Miles asks if it's time, and she says that it's.

He moves to your side and holds your hand. You curse at him, probably hurting his hand, and saying that you're not going to have his babies anymore. A few times during that process.

Miles just encourages you. He kisses your sweaty forehead. He praises you. You feel so weak by the end. He says that you're doing amazing, but hearing him say that she's almost here gives you that extra strength to push.

Hearing her crying filling the room makes your body go limp. You smile while taking a deep breath.

Miles kisses you. “She's here, babe, and she's perfect.” You nod, not having a lot of strength right then.

The nurse puts your baby on your chest. You kiss her head crying, and your baby is finally here. “Welcome to the world, Ella harper Wood.” You kiss her head again.

Miles rests his forehead on yours “she's perfect, babe. We made her.” He kisses your forehead.

The nurse comes in saying that they need her, and you pass her to the nurse.

“Go be with her.” You push Miles towards where she's getting cleaned.

Your doctor works on you to make sure that everything is okay. The few pushes after giving birth and the stitches.

Miles takes one last look at you before he goes with the nurses to follow your baby. The room starts to get less crowded, which is a relief. You close your eyes when you're alone. The only sounds inside the room are the machines connected to you.

You don't hear Miles coming in. He kisses your head, thinking you're asleep. You open your eyes to look at him. You mumble a soft “hey”.

“Are you okay, sweetheart?” He watches you with such a worried look in his eyes. You nod but ask for water, Miles goes to get you water. He rubs your arm when he's back, and you slowly drink the water.

“Is everything okay with her ?” You ask between sips.

“Yeah. She's perfect. You did a good job, Mama.” He kisses your head. He's so proud of you. He definitely has a new admiration for you.

You nod and smile. That's what you needed, to know that she's okay.

“Babe, I know I'm supposed to be resting, but I need to call your mom to talk to Lily.” Miles watches you for a second before nodding and grabbing his phone.

He texted her when he was with El saying that the new Wood was born. He facetimes her, Cheryl smiles, seeing her son's face on the screen. She says, "A congratulations and asks," How are you doing? " Miles says that you're tired, but all good.

He says that he's going to give you the phone. You talk to Cheryl a little before asking if you can talk to Lily. She takes the phone to your baby, seeing Lily's face, and you relax a little more.

You talk to her, asking how she's doing, if she's having fun with grandma and grandpa. She says that she is but that she misses you. You say that you miss her too and soon she'll be home with daddy and her baby sister. She gets excited.

You say that you love her before passing the phone for Miles. He talks to her, and you drift off hearing your loves talking to each other.

Miles plans with his mom for her to bring Lily in the middle of the afternoon. He knows you need that and that you feel guilty for leaving her in the middle of the night.

He lays in the hospital bed with you. He just wants to hold you. It doesn't take long for the nurse to bring El for her breastfeeding.

Miles wakes you. He helps you settle before passing El to you. You smile seeing that cute little face. You kiss her forehead, saying that you're her mommy.

It takes a little time for her to latch, but when she does, you relax big time. Miles gives you the space to be with her.

You brush your finger over all her features. Saying that she has the best daddy and the best big sister, that you guys are so excited for her to be part of your family.

Miles stays outside of the door, updating his family, his teammates, and ordering you food. He knows you're hungry.

When he comes back, he sees you counting El's little toes and fingers. Miles is still a little worried, but he sees that you're more like yourself now.

He moves closer to you. “Can I hold her ?” You look at him a little confused.

You chuckle, nodding because, of course, he can pick his baby. Miles picks her up, settling with her in his arms. You watch El stir a little before settling completely in her daddy's big chest.

“Babe, do you mind if I take a nap ?” Miles is shocked that you asked him that.

“Not at all, rest, sweetheart.” He kisses El's head to settle her a little more. You nod before turning to your side.

Miles holds El as long as he can while you're asleep. The nurse comes to get her. He gets your food and then just sits there looking at you. You wake up to those piercing blue eyes staring at you. You blink a few times, getting him focused.

“Can I have more water, please ?” You lick your lips, feeling a little dry.

“Yeah.” Miles picks the cup and helps you drink. “I brought food for you, babe.” You take a big sip before nodding.

“What about you ? Did you eat ?” You pass the cup to Miles. He looks at you, and you know he didn't.

“Why were you staring ?” You ask, lacing your fingers.

“I'm worried about you, babe.” He sighs, running his hand through his hair.

“Why ? I'm okay.”

“You don't look like yourself, I just don't want something to happen to you.”

“Hey, c'mon here.” You cup his cheeks moving to the side to give his big body space.

“I'm okay, I promise you that. I'm exhausted, being in labor in the middle of the night is not fun, and I miss Lily too.”

“Yeah, I know.” He closes his eyes, feeling your fingers brush along his cheekbone.

“I didn't like leaving her like that in the middle of the night. I know she's okay with your parents. And I promise you, it doesn't change my feelings for El. I love her and I'm so happy she's here with us. I'm exhausted and hungry, probably not the best combination.” You smile, seeing you smile brings a smile onto Miles' lips.

You kiss him before asking if he can bring you the food. You hear that giggle as Miles goes to get you the food.

You thank him before putting a lot of food in your mouth. You give him a look, for him to eat too. If you need food, he does, too.

Miles picks your tray of food as you drink a little more water. You pat empty space beside you for Miles to join you. You need hubby cuddles. He's so careful with the wires and iv on your arms. He doesn't need the nurses to come running scared into the room.

You bury your face in his chest, just needing to feel secure. This is one of the most vulnerable moments that he ever saw you, and he'll take care of you.

You guys cuddle until you hear a knock on the door. Miles kisses your head before getting up to open the door.

You hear your oldest voice saying hi, dada. You smile, getting a little emotional, and Miles squats to give her a kiss. Then, he holds her hand to help her walk towards you.

She's holding a bouquet to give to you. Miles helps her to jump into the bed. “Mama” she's so excited as she settles against you. You kiss her head, holding her close to your body. You thank her for the flowers and then bring her to your lap.

“Baby, mommy is so sorry for leaving like that last night.” Lily looks at you with her big blue eyes.

“ ‘s okay mama, I have a new baby sister now.” She's so excited, and it's adorable. You kiss her head before putting her beside you. You guys talk, and the nurses bring El for another one on one with Mommy before feeding.

While you guys talk, Miles shows El to his parents. Then you ask Lily if she wants to meet her baby sister. Lily says that she does.

Miles brings El, placing her in your arms. Lily's little face moves closer to El, she wants to meet her baby sister. She kisses El's forehead, blushing a little at El's reaction.

“She loves you too, baby.” Lily smiles at you as she brushes her finger on El's hair.

Miles snaps a few pictures of his girls together. You kiss Lily's head, letting her have a moment with her sister. Cheryl sends Miles to be with you guys so she can take a few pictures of you.

You cup his cheek, looking at him with heart eyes. You mouth a thank you for him, he rests his forehead on yours and Lily kisses El's forehead again. It's the perfect picture.

He pecks your lips before looking at his family. El starts to get fussy.

“Baby, can you go with Daddy while mommy feeds baby El. After she is done, you can come say goodbye before going home with grandma and grandpa.” Lily nods and makes grabby hands for miles.

He picks her up, giving her lots of kisses, making her giggle. You smile as they leave the room. You shift El for her to be comfortable. This time, she latches right away.

“You're going to have the best big sister, baby.” El wiggles a little because she feels that too, Mommy.

You watch your baby eat, slowly at her own pace. She's so adorable, lots of Wood's genes in her. The caramel hair, the bone structure, she has your nose and mouth. So you're happy. Miles will be in trouble when his girls grow up.

Miles comes in a few minutes later, and Lily has her mouth full of chocolate. And you give him a look, shaking your head.

“There are wipes in the bag.” You point to the bag, Miles nods and picks the wipes to clean Lily's mouth.

Lily comes to join you with a clean mouth. You pass El for Miles to hold her. You kiss Lily's head and tickle her belly. Her laugh is a good sound to your ears.

You look at Cheryl, biting your bottom lip. Then you look at Miles. He's entertained by El.

“Cheryl, can you help me with something ?” Miles almost snapped his head, looking at you.

“Of course, sweetheart.” She grabs your bag before moving to your side to help you get out of bed.

Randy moves to be with Lily, and you move slowly to the bathroom.

“Babe…” You hear Miles calling for you as you enter the bathroom.

Cheryl helps you sit on the toilet, and she closes the door. You take a big deep breath.

“I'm sorry, I couldn't ask anyone else. I understand if it's too personal for you, but I don't think I can have Miles looking at my body right now.” Cheryl is taken aback for the personal part, but she understands not wanting Miles to see you right now.

“It can be a little personal, but you're my daughter too. And I'm here to help you. Not only Miles, you too.” She moves to hug you. “But you need to talk to him. He needs to know that.” You nod, hugging her back.

You and Cheryl work on getting you undressed. You pee and change your pad. Putting on some normal clothes makes you feel happy.

You guys go back into the room. You thank her before moving back to bed again. Miles is holding El and talking to Lily.

You tell Lily that she's going home with grandma and grandpa. Mommy and Daddy will be there soon. You give her lots of kisses before Randy helps her out of the bed. She blows kisses to you from the door. You smile and blow her kisses. El is passed out in her daddy's arms.

She looks so peaceful in his arms. The nurse comes to get El, saying that she'll bring her soon for another feeding. You nod and thank her.

Miles comes closer. He fixes your blanket before hugging you. Your head rests on his abs.

“I'm sorry.” Miles looks at you confused before lifting your chin to look at him.

“Why are you apologizing, love ?” You shrug as Miles give you the look. Don't hide.

“Ahh, I thought I hurt you by asking your mom to help me.” His face goes soft, hearing that.

“Sweetheart, you just had a baby. You can basically do whatever you want. At first, I was a little disappointed, but then I remembered that you're doing what makes you feel comfortable.” He pecks your lips as the tears stream down your cheeks.

“Yeah, I'm not comfortable with you seeing my body right now.” Telling him that shows how far you guys come together.

“I understand, baby. And I'll help you in any way that I can, keeping the boundaries you just set for us.” You nod thanking him.

Your doctor comes in to check on you, and how are you doing. If everything continues like this, you can go home tomorrow.

You ask Miles for food, and if he wants to go home, shower, change, and take a nap, you'll be fine in the hospital. He looks offended by your suggestion.

“I'm not going anywhere until you and El are discharged.” You sigh, closing your eyes.

“Babe, you need to rest too. I'm going to be okay for a couple of hours. I need you to take care of yourself too.” Miles has his debating face.

“Okay. I'll go home, change, and shower, but not nap.” You nod. If this is what you can get from him, it's fine.

You and Miles cuddle as you fall asleep on him. When you wake up, Miles says that he'll go home and bring you food after. You thank him softly.

While you wait, you decide to scroll through your phone to pass the time. You have a bunch of texts from the halves congratulating you, his teammates too. Some say that they hope she looks like you and not Miles. It makes you laugh.

You see Miles post, a picture he took of you holding both of your girls. With the caption:

“My world right here, welcome to the family baby”

It makes you smile, but there is one just for you. With different pictures from your dating years.

“To my strong wife, thank you for giving me these greatest gifts. But also you loved me before I could do the same. I want our girls to grow up to be strong like their mother. You're the best, babe.”

And this one makes you cry, not hearing what he thinks of you often and your hormones. It make you soft. Miles is becoming the best husband.

When Miles come with food, you're feeding El after spending some mommy and daughter time with her. His hair is still wet, and you know he showered and left. You just hope he loved Lily before leaving.

Miles comes closer, he pecks your lips and brushes his finger over el's head. Little girl stirred but didn't stop eating.

“I love you.” That big grin shows on his lips again. “I love you too.” He kisses you before putting the food on the table.

While El eats, he takes the containers out to put them on the tray for you. His mom made food for you. You get emotional again, Cheryl is just amazing.

El finishes eating, and you shift her for a burp. Then Miles picks her up for cuddles while you eat. You're half way through your dinner, and she starts to cry and get fussy. You stop eating to tend to her.

Miles stops you saying that he got this. He sits with her, strips his shirt, and does skin to skin with her. It takes a couple of minutes, but then she settles.

You smile at them. Miles is really an amazing dad. Miles looks at you, so in love. He still can't believe you agreed to have more of his babies.

The rest of the night flies by. There are some moments where El gets super fussy. But you guys work it out as a family.

The next morning you get discharged, going home makes you so happy. Miles is so careful that it's a little funny.

The whole family is waiting for you guys. Lily comes running to you, and you give her lots of kisses. You take a shower at home and then just cuddle the rest of the day.

Later that night in Miles' arms, “Thank you for giving me this life.”

Miles pecks your lips. “Always sweetheart, it's what you deserve.

You snuggle closer, enjoying the quiet for now.

……

Life at home has been an adjustment for sure for the next couple of months. El struggled a little bit, but thankfully, you had Miles and his parents.

Lily was perfect the whole time. Thankfully, hers and El's nap schedules were different. So you could love both of your babies, giving Lily that mama and daughter time.

She's getting so smart, definitely a little sassy. Miles doesn't know how to handle it, and you think it's funny.

Miles has been perfect, too. Your marriage continues getting stronger and closer. All the bumps made you guys better.

Then Miles' season started, you all had to make another adjustment. You called Miles crying a couple times in the middle of the night. His heart broke every time. He hates seeing you like that.

But when he's home, he's home. He's taking care of Lily and El, so you can have some me time. For you to have a long bath and things like that.

You're glad that you and Miles made sure Lily continued as a toddler. She didn't need to grow up because of her sister. That's so important to you.

You and Miles started taking date nights with each other but also with Lily. And you like how things are going, that's something you always wanted. Her being a kid.

Miles is such a gentleman and respectful when it comes to your body issues after pregnancy. He gives you the space necessary to feel comfortable enough.

One night, you decided to be bold. Your doctor cleared you a while back, but you didn't feel good enough to go through it.

You're in the bathroom looking at yourself in the mirror. You bought lingerie that looked good, but now they feel a little off. You're nervous, taking one last look in the mirror. You take a big deep breath before sliding the robe on and moving to the master.

Miles is scrolling through his phone. He lifts his eyes, looking at you with a soft smile. You just go for it, opening the robe and letting it slide from your body. Miles puts his phone to the side and shifts so he can be closer to you.

“Holy shit, babe. You're fucking gorgeous.”

Your cheeks get warm at the way he's looking at you. Miles moves to where you're standing.

He stops in front of you, pulling your hands to touch his body. “Can I touch you, gorgeous ?” You take a deep breath as you nod.

“Baby, I need to hear you say the words.” It's important to him that you say what you want.

“Yes, you can.” His smile brights the whole room. He leans to kiss you. First, he just rests his hands on your side. As you stop overthinking, his hands wander more through your body. Your hands start to wander his body too, shoulders, hair, neck, his arms.

He likes that a lot and humms into the kiss. Miles cups your ass cheeks before scooping your legs to wrap around his waits. Feeling his bulge between your legs makes you moan.

You missed that feeling for sure. Miles starts to gives your body love. He looks at your face, to see if you're uncomfortable. He kisses every possible inch of your body.

As much as he would like to go to town on your boobs, he just cups them softly. Because he knows they're still uncomfortable for you.

“Woody, I need you.” Miles chuckles as he kisses your ribs. He sits on his heels, and you lift your head to look at him.

“Babe, we need a little more foreplay. I don't want to hurt you.” You know he's right, but it doesn't make it easier for you to wait, after waiting for so long.

Miles makes his way back to your lips. He kisses your jaw line, cheeks, the corner of your mouth, and your lips. You sigh, having his lips attached to yours again. You nibble his bottom lip to have his attention. Miles moans before facing you.

“Please.” Your voice is like a whine and Miles agrees. He pulls your underwear down before stripping himself. Your eyes go wide seeing his big cock erect for you.

You moan as he smirks. Miles strokes himself and uses his fingers on you to open you up a little. He lines himself and starts to slide inside you. But your body is resisting him big time.

“Babe, we can stop. It's clearly painful for you.” Miles moves your hand from your face.

“But I want it, I need you. It's time.” Miles chuckles a little bit. He pecks your lips. “Do you want to try with the lube ? We worked for us before.” Your hand plays with his abs while you think.

“Yeah, we can try.” He smirks before getting up to grab the lube. He settles himself again between your legs, pouring lube on his hands.

Miles strokes himself, spreading the lube. He puts a little on you too.

“Are you ready, babe ?” You watch Miles line himself with your entrance.

“Yeah, I am.” Miles smiles before sliding in.

“Tell me, if I'm hurting you or it's uncomfortable, babe.” You nod, before mumbling an okay. Miles slowly slide inside you as your nails dig in his shoulder. But when it doesn't hurt, your grip is lighter. You open your eyes to see Miles staring at you with a smirk on his lips. You look down seeing that he's completely inside you.

You smile at him as you brush your thumb on his cheekbone before bringing him for a deep kiss. Feeling adjusted to his size, you wiggle so Miles can start moving to build up the tempo.

You missed this so much, Miles is careful building up the tempo. He knows that it's going to be tricky making you cum today, but boy he's struggling himself. Having your tight heat around him again after so long, makes him crazy. He's going to focus on you for now.

He moves his thumb to rub circles on your clit. You moan moving your hips toward his finger. Miles changes your position to go deeper inside you.

“OH, fuck.” You cover your face, but Miles moves so he can see you.

“Babe, I'm hurting you ?” He slows down his movements.

“Nope, it just feels so good.” Miles smirks as he leans to kiss you. He increases the tempo again, knowing that you're okay.

You call for him a few times, and Miles know that you're close. He rubs a few more firm circles, bringing you over the edge and bringing him over the edge too. It's not a crashing orgasm but enough to make you happy and make yourself tight around him.

Miles groans as he moves his hips. “God, I love you.” You smile, bringing her for a kiss, you lick his bottom lip. “I love you too.”

He chuckles and pecks your lips. He pulls out and settles before pulling you to his body.

“Thanks for waiting for me.” Miles kisses your head seeing you play with his chest hairs. “Always, I'll always wait for you,sweetheart.”

You kiss his chest, enjoying his body before needing to pee. “I'm going to shower. Do you want to join me ?” He looks at you a little surprised because it's been a while that you asked to be this intimate with him.

“Yeah, I do. And I got El next, you can rest.” You smile thanking him with a little smooch before you get up to move to the bathroom.

You guys take a shower together. Miles is so soft and gentle, touching your body. He makes sure that you're feeling okay with his touches. He smiles softly. He knows that it's not easy, but he's so proud of you.

“Babe ?” You look at him with soft eyes.

“Yeah ?” Miles kisses your cheek.

“I'm so proud of you.” You look at him confused.

“Why ?” Miles pushes your hair from your face.

“Because you took your time, you reached out when you were ready. You gave me another baby, you make my life better every single day.” You smile as your cheeks get warmer.

You kiss him, because that's the only way you can express what you're feeling. Miles helps you get out of the shower wrapping around the towel, he lets you finish your night routine.

You come back to the bedroom and Miles is holding your underwear.

“We can keep these babe, they look so good on you.” You shake your head before joining him in bed.

He wraps those strong big arms around you. And you fall asleep so quickly, the girls got that from their mama for sure. Just like he promised, Miles takes care of El in the middle of the night.

#The first time she kicked!!! 🥹#Girl dad Miles CONFIRMED #Lily is already the big sis!#Get me to Sedona asap plz #but only with Miles #LMAO! Not gonna have any more of his big ass babies. I get it #BABY ELLLA!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WELCOME!!!!#Counting her fingers and toes… im sobbing!#Stopppp omg! Lily is so excited!!!#Ohhhh his mom helping her in that vulnerable moment #But Miles wants to do it 😭 and also so understanding about the why #Ross definitely said he hopes the baby looks like you #We love a sweet baby daddy Instagram post!#Nothing hotter than a dad doing skin to skin with their baby 🤤#Love the date nights with Lily too along with for each other #DAMN RIGHT HE DROPPED THAT PHONE!!!#Wooodddyyyyyyy #Team lube!!!!#this was pure soft fluffy sweet perfection!#miles wood x reader #our little family #👢 anon #blog submission

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carnivalcarriondiscarded · 1 year

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oh god wait. so if the episodes are "days" to the puppets, and traditionally, new episodes air once per week... then are the puppets only ever awake for one day per week? if that, cause wouldn't episodes only be about an hour long, probs less? so they're awake for however long it takes to film one episode, and then they sleep until the next.

and if Wally doesn't sleep...

#h. hold on a second hold. i need a minute hold on-#is wally awake and alone in the dark for a week at a time #waiting for his next chance to see his friends. to see anyone at all other than Home #how does it feel to him when he goes an episode - maybe multiple without seeing certain neighbors #bc it was implied on the website that some episodes don't have every character interact with wally during his shenanigans #oh fuck and if the show Ended... and he continued on... how many years has he been in the empty dark with only creaks for company #sobs loudly i cant do this-#welcome home #welcome home puppet show #i really hope they get to be awake each 'day'#i put it in quotes bc wasnt it also implied that their days are vastly different from ours #but they probably arent. theyre probably sleeping for a full week at a time #clawing at the walls over this im so emotional #do you think wally like... goes to their houses to visit them while they sleep #hm now im remembering that barnaby and wally sleepover piece clown drew #and im seeing it in an Entirely new and Vastly More Sad light

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dangans-ur-ronpas · 8 hours

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Chapter 20

alright guys hit the showers. or the bathhouse. wait hold on i left my computer boy in there. guys wait don't open that

SEE HERE FOR GENERAL WARNINGS AND FIC SUMMARY

Some pre-chapter notes:

wow i wrote 10 pages for chapter 19 but i better take it easy so i dont burn out (writes 11 pages for chapter 20) anyway guess who's taking a break after this chapter

this is the one with togiri development but they're extremely not normal about it so it's almost blink-and-you-miss-it

@digitaldollsworld <- betapilled readmaxxer

Content warning tags: mild violence and injury description (non-graphic), description of depression symptoms and nausea, mild mention of eating disorder

< previous - from start - next >

He’s not sure how long he sleeps for, only that he wakes up still-dressed and laid out across his bed, his mouth dry and head groggy, the bedroom lights still on. As he checks his handbook’s clock, he finds he’s entirely missed Monokuma’s morning announcement, which is a good thing; he had no desire to listen to that bear’s irritating voice, especially not today.

But, he doesn’t have much desire to do anything else either. The library no longer feels like the safe haven it used to be, and he had no interest in going anywhere else and running into anyone else, when the atmosphere was still thick with the deaths of two people, and pity that Byakuya didn’t want. Much less, the possibility of encountering Makoto, who was the last person he wanted to see, so to speak.

He lies in bed a moment longer, unwilling to move. Everything feels sluggish, like he’s moving underwater; even his head feels stuffed full with cotton and wool. It's a strange, unfamiliar feeling, and unpleasant, too.

Grief. He thinks blearily at first, before rolling his own eyes at the thought, and pushing himself up with a grunt. Such dramatics didn’t suit him. He wasn't the kind of person to spare such theatrics, regardless of his circumstances.

He showers, brushes his teeth, and half-debates whether to try his hand at shaving before ultimately deciding against it (it didn’t feel like his stubble should be that noticeable, yet). He forgoes changing into a clean uniform in favor of his pajamas, and collapses back into bed with a sigh, hand searching immediately for his handbook - but finding nothing but empty sheets.

“Hello, there!”

He jerks upright immediately. Standing in the foot of his bed is Monokuma, rocking back and forth and looking as innocent as could be. Or, would be, if not for the handbook clutched in its paw.

Byakuya dives for it without thinking, but his perception is off, and he crashes to the carpet instead with a grunt. Monokuma sidesteps him casually with a laugh. “Whoa, there! Easy partner, don’t wanna hurt yourself!” It dances around his head, infuriatingly out of reach. “Didja miss me that bad? If you wanna hug, you can just say so!”

“Give it back,” He snarls, as he picks himself up. He’s in no mood for its jokes. “Give me back my handbook!”

“Your handbook? My my, but these were all mine first, weren’t they?” It shakes a paw disapprovingly in his face. “I just need to check it real quick, after all. I didn’t expect Mister Fujisaki to go and Macgyver anything onto here, so if it’s anything malicious, I’ll have to do a quick wipey-wipe!” Byakuya makes another lunge, and it juggles the handbook out of his reach, hopping backwards with a mad cackle. “After all, if it’s anything naughty, there’s no way I can let it fall in the hands of my precious students!”

“You miserable little-” Byakuya tries to rise to his feet quickly, but he hasn’t eaten since yesterday, and a bout of dizziness crashes into him like a wave. He sways and braces himself against the mattress, one arm still reaching out clumsily to try and grab at Monokuma.

But the bear has already flipped it open, scrolling so quickly through the screens that the little automated voice can’t keep up, the words blurring together. “Schoo-Stu-App-Day-”

“Whoops, too far.” It scrolls back. “Applications, that’s what we wanna see. And, what’s this?”

Byakuya feels his blood run cold. There was only one application there, the one Chihiro had downloaded for him. Alter Ego. The app was inconspicuously named ‘Test_App’ in the interface itself, but if Monokuma opened it-

“Well well well. Let’s take a look-see!” It crows, and Byakuya’s protest is frozen in his throat. He shuts his eyes, expecting to hear Chihiro’s voice-

“Black to E5.”

He opens his eyes again. What?

Monokuma also seems confused, tilting its head as it stares at the little screen. “What’s this? A chessboard?”

“Black to E5,” Alter Ego repeats, so digitized and monotone it was nearly unrecognizable. “Would you like to review the board?”

“Is this all it is? A chess game?” Monokuma sounds almost disappointed. Byakuya, seeing his chance, surges forward, snatching the handbook back and snapping it closed. He presses it to his chest, feeling his heart thud beneath it.

“Is that a problem?” He demands, and Monokuma shrugs, shaking its head.

“I guess not, but I thought it’d be something spicy, y’know? You’re a growing boy, after all!” It reaches out to pat Byakuya’s knee, and he steps backwards just in time, lip curling in disgust. “Aw, don’t act so mean to your headmaster, you’ll give me a complex!”

“Get out.” He hisses. “You got what you came here for. Leave.”

“Oh, alright…you sure know how to make a bear feel glum...” It sighs, kicking at the carpet, before it makes its way to the door. “Take care, now! Make sure you eat something, y’hear? I don’t want any hunger strikes in this house! And-”

No sooner had Monokuma crossed the threshold, had Byakuya jumped up, and sped forward to slam the door with a resounding bang. He takes a moment to breathe, leaning against the wall, legs suddenly weak.

How the hell did that thing get inside my room? He was sure he had locked the door - or he should have locked it, at least. Looking back, he actually can’t remember, but he double and triple-checks now, suddenly paranoid. He also flips off the light for good measure, leaving the room in complete darkness before he crawls back into bed.

Beneath the covers, he opens his handbook, and squints until he can make out the pale green shape of Alter Ego’s face on the screen.

“Is he gone?” Alter Ego asks, and Byakuya relaxes, the tension flooding out of his shoulders.

“Yes.” He whispers back.

Alter Ego makes a sound like a sigh of relief. “I’m glad. I got so scared when he grabbed me.” And its voice sounds so much like Chihiro's that Byakuya feels a strange pressure behind his eyes.

“How did you know?” He asks. “That Monokuma was there?”

“I could hear it. Through the microphone.” He reaches up and touches the tiny pinprick grid of the speaker, and feels the buzz of Alter Ego’s voice against his fingertips. “I didn’t want you to get in trouble.”

“Don’t worry about me. I think he would’ve just deleted you as punishment for me anyway.” He sighs. And then frowns, as a thought comes to mind. “If you could eavesdrop from the microphone this whole time, then you already know…?”

He doesn’t finish his sentence. But he doesn’t need to. Alter Ego makes a quiet noise like a sigh. “Yes, I know.”

“I’m sorry.” And he’s surprised to find that he means it genuinely, and almost laughs at himself. Heartfelt apologies were rare for him, and here he was offering one to an AI, of all things.

“It’s okay. He knew it might happen,” Alter Ego replies, and he imagines it might be smiling, a sad, helpless smile. “There’s nothing we can do about it now.”

“No, I suppose not.”

They’re quiet for a moment. In the darkness, Byakuya can almost pretend that he’s normal - unable to see in the dark as everyone else is. But it’s also the middle of the day, and he’s too restless to sleep, too uneasy to go outside. Too tired to mourn. Too mournful to do anything else.

“Can you really play chess?” He asks instead.

“I can, along with checkers, shogi, and backgammon and more.”

“Play a round of chess with me, then. I’m bored.”

“Okay!” Immediately, the pale blot of their face on the screen is replaced by a square. “I’ll play black. What’s your first move?”

He smiles to himself. “E2, pawn to E4.”

—

Hours pass like that. He plays chess with Alter Ego (three wins, four losses, and seven draws), and a few rounds of shogi (one win, one loss, and two draws) for good measure. And then, huddled over his desk with his back facing the camera, he pores over lines of Dostoevsky and Nietzsche until he feels too sick from staring at the letters to even hear Alter Ego’s voice, reciting the words aloud beneath a dim ringing in his ears.

By the time he’s pulled out of his concentration by the sound of a knocking at his door, he’s too nauseous to feel hungry, but his throat is stinging from lack of water and there’s a slight pulsing in his head. His immediate first reaction is to ignore it, but that proves to be impossible; whoever was on the other side was clearly, very persistent, and had nothing better to do.

Even so, he lasts a full five minutes until he finally gets up to answer, irritated beyond measure. If it was Makoto, he was going to slam it closed again, reasons be damned. He didn’t even want to think about the other boy, lest he get pointlessly enraged about it.

But instead of brown hair, he’s met with pale white. Kirigiri stands at his threshold, hand partially raised, halfway through knocking, and they stare at each for a moment in silence, as if both surprised to find the other person there.

And then he slams the door shut in her face. Or tries to - instead of the satisfying bang of wood meeting wood, there’s a sickly crunch, and then she’s wrenching the door open, heedless of the way her fingers had just been crushed in the jamb. He almost winces in sympathy, but she’s too busy pushing her way in to offer much room for condolences.

“What is wrong with you?!” He demands, trying not to be too obviously perturbed by her lack of reaction; he doesn’t think he even heard her wince. She ignores him for a moment, attention focused on her hand, as she experimentally clenches and unclenches her fingers. Apparently they’re not broken, or maybe, she just had high pain tolerance. Or she was more insane than he thought.

“We’re calling a group meeting,” She replies, without so much as a waver. “Come to the bathhouse.”

“And why should I?”

“It’s important. I can drag you there if I have to.” It doesn’t sound like an empty threat either. Somehow, she seems impatient, though he’s not sure how he can tell; and it wasn’t just because she shoved her hand into the door in order to deliver the message.

He weighs his options - on one hand, he has no desire to speak with anyone, much less Makoto, who was bound to be there. On the other hand, he didn’t exactly have anything in the way of provisions in his room, and though he was still a little too light-headed to consider eating, it’d be embarrassing to collapse from dehydration at this point. That, and it seemed that Kirigiri had no intention of letting him refuse.

“...I’m going to get dressed first.” He says shortly. If he’s going to have to meet them, it will not be while he’s still in his pajamas.

“Hurry up.”

She makes no move to leave, and he realizes with no small amount of annoyance that she was making sure he wouldn’t be able to run or shut her out again. Somewhat affronted by this, and now wanting to go even less, he grabs a clean set of clothes from his dresser and goes to the bathroom.

Routine carries his hands through the motions, so he manages it relatively quick, but it’s only after he’s applying the finishing touches, that he nearly pokes himself in the eye as he reaches to adjust his glasses. It’s a strange sensation, feeling the bridge of his nose and finding nothing, and even though his original prescription was low and they were more an accessory than anything, he feels a little like he’s lost a limb.

She’s still there when he emerges, though now standing over his desk, bent over the books he has open. She looks up as he approaches, one hand halfway through turning a page.

“What?” He asks, chin turned up in challenge.

“Nothing. Just looking.” She closes the book, and he realizes, scandalized, that it was the one he was reading earlier. It was going to take him ages to find that page again. “You have predictable tastes.”

“Shut up. Are we going or not?”

He follows her out, his hands twitching all the while, smoothing down his shirt, his lapels, his sleeves. Making sure his buttons were lined up, that his shirt was tucked; he hadn’t had the time to put on garters or even try a hand at his tie, and he feels underdressed.

“You’re fine.” Kirigiri says suddenly, and he freezes, one hand resting on the button of a shirt cuff. “Stop fidgeting.”

He scowls. He was walking behind her, so what would she know. “I’m not fidgeting.”

“I can hear you fidgeting. Your buttons are fine.”

“Oh, can you hear my buttons now too?”

It’s a petty, childish remark, one that he can’t stop himself from muttering before he can even reconsider it. She stops at that, halting so suddenly in the middle of the hallway that he almost walks right into her, and turns around to face him, her head moving in a slow tilt from up to down - scanning me, he realizes - before she says: “You look fine. Are you quite done?”

She was checking for me. He’s not sure if he should feel grateful for the courtesy or irritated by her lack of grace. “Did the sound bother you that much?” He asks instead, patting down the front of his shirt one last time.

“...It wasn’t the sound.” Is all she says, with a sort of finality that indicated that no other questions would be answered on the topic.

They enter the bathhouse, and find everyone else there, gathered in a sort of semi-circle around the wall of lockers. Asahina and Ogami, predictably, are huddled close together on one of the benches. Celeste and Yamada sit on another bench, one fidgeting uneasily, the other sitting regally with legs crossed and hands folded. Hagakure is standing next to Owada, who doesn’t even stir when they walk in, and who Byakuya ignores in turn, gaze sliding past him uncomfortably. Fukawa hangs near the back of the group, and twitches when she sees him, though makes no move to approach.

Makoto is leaning against the lockers with hands tucked in his pockets. He looks up as they enter, and stands up straight immediately. “Ah-”

“We’re all here?” Kirigiri cuts him off, casting a glance around the room. “Good. Can you catch him up, Hina?”

“R-right,” Asahina looks between Kirigiri and Byakuya, then at Makoto, and seems to hesitate for a moment. “Um, so…last night, I couldn’t sleep, so I thought I’d go to the kitchen to get food. But on the way there, I heard something coming from the bathhouse - like, a weird, machine-y kind of sound? - and when I went in…”

She peters off. He raises an eyebrow, “And?”

“Uh, it’s going to sound a little ridiculous...”

“You act like nothing else is ridiculous about this situation. Get on with it.”

Her face flushes dark, embarrassed. He gets the feeling that Ogami is glaring at him, but since he can’t see it - and has no reason to act like he can see it, anyways - he ignores it easily.

“Right. I saw a ghost - I know it was a ghost,” She adds defensively, as Byakuya was preparing to scoff and roll his eyes. “It was glowing green and floating in front of the lockers, and…and it had Chihiro’s face.”

“That’s-” not a ghost, he’s about to say, but he stops, suddenly uncertain. The bathhouse had no cameras, but he wasn’t sure if Alter Ego’s existence should be revealed here, now, to everyone, especially given some of the individuals present. His hand reaches into his jacket pocket, where his handbook was. “That’s…and you’re sure it was Chihiro?”

She seems taken aback by how seriously he asks that, and nods quickly. “I know it was Chihiro! It was his face and everything!” She points in front of her, at a locker less than two meters away from her eye level. The exact locker, Byakuya thinks, where Chihiro was keeping his laptop.

He wonders if Makoto was thinking this too.

“...I highly doubt the existence of ghosts,” He sighs. There was no point trying to hide it with Kirigiri around, and better to do it now than later. “Instead of being in front of the locker, I think the thing you saw was inside it.”

He turns to the locker Asahina had indicated, and moves to unlock it - before realizing he doesn’t know how. If it was unlocked by key, he didn’t have it, and if by code it was even more impossible. But Kirigiri steps forward, nudging his arm out of the way, and the locker door clicks open under her hand.

Sitting inside is the laptop, its screen dark. After a moment, it hums to life, flickering green. A round, pale shape forms, and behind him, Byakuya hears someone gasp.

“Hello,” Alter Ego says, and their voice is clearer through the computer than through Byakuya’s handbook, and sounds so similar to Chihiro’s that it’s almost jarring. “It’s nice to meet everyone!”

Hagakure shrieks, arms thrown up in fear. “A g-g-gh-!”

“It’s not a ghost,” Byakuya cuts him off sharply. “It’s a program.”

“Yes, and it looks like something Chihiro made.” Kirigiri touches the keys lightly. “This computer was the broken one from the library. And the fact that it was placed here, out of sight of the mastermind, means that it was meant for us.”

“So, this is what I saw last night…” Asahina’s tone doesn’t sound uneasy anymore, but wondering, and she raises a tentative hand as the little Chihiro in the screen waves at her. “But, what is it?”

“You just asked, ‘what is it,’ right?” Alter Ego says, almost teasingly, making her and several others jump. “The short answer is, I’m an AI program based on as much of Chihiro Fujisaki’s personality, memories, and thoughts as he managed to transcribe into data…um, but if it’s easier for you, you can call me Alter Ego. I was made to try and break through the firewall around the school’s network and to analyze the files on this computer, but it’s been taking a long time. I’m only about 25% done.”

25%? That was already more than Byakuya expected, and he feels a thin, inexplicable strum of pride.

“Crazy…hey, isn’t this crazy?” Yamada is up from his seat, and sitting as close as he can, crouching on his heels to be eye-level with the screen. “This is so- so totally sci-fi, right? Isn’t the genre wrong?” He sounds excited, overly so, and his breath is a little fevered and fast. “Hey, Chihiro! Can you hear us?”

Alter Ego doesn’t respond. Byakuya suddenly remembers the night that Chihiro was installing the application on his handbook and how Alter Ego only ever responded after the sound of keystrokes. “You have to type what you want to say in order for it to respond.”

“Move.” Yamada scurries out of Kirigiri’s way, as she drops to a crouch in front of the open locker. There’s the sound of fingers clicking over keys, and then -

“It will take me a while longer to finish analyzing everything,” Alter Ego says aloud, a little sheepishly. “I can definitely finish it though! Actually, progress is moving faster than originally predicted, so you can leave it to me!”

“My, how dependable.” Celeste remarks. “It seems that Chihiro has left us an invaluable gift, does it not?”

“It’s…pretty crazy,” Hagakure agrees, scratching his head. “Wait, uh - can Alter Ego get online? Like can we call for help from outside?”

“Hmm, probably not.” Asahina hums in thought, crossing her arms. “We’re in a bathhouse after all.”

“Then, if we take it outside of here-”

“No.” Kirigiri says flatly. “We can’t take any risks. Taking it outside might mean that the mastermind will discover it.”

“Yeah, but, I think it’s better to get help sooner than later. You know…” He pauses for a moment, tilting his head pointedly towards Owada. Throughout this whole time, the Ultimate Biker Gang Leader had been as still as a mouse, face turned downwards towards the floor. Hagakure clears his throat awkwardly. “Can’t we try it?”

There’s a sharp tap as Celeste laces her fingers, rings clicking together. “As stated earlier. We cannot take unnecessary risks. And we are not in the position to be pointlessly altruistic.” Her tone is casual, but Hagakure seems to shrink away from her, defeated.

“I…okay. Fine, sure.” He scratches at his head, then pauses. “Ah, wait a minute. Does Alter Ego, like, know…?

His question peters off, but the implication hangs over them like a heavy fog. Byakuya watches them cast uneasy glances at each other, then back to Alter Ego, as if trying to figure out who should break the news.

“It already knows.” He mutters. He’s not trying to be loud, but in the silence everyone could hear it anyways.

“...Not to say you’re lying or anything, Byakuya, but how do you…?”

Instead of answering Hagakure out loud, he reaches into his jacket pocket and withdraws the handbook, flipping it open and holding it up, screen facing them. Someone gasps.

“Yes,” Alter Ego confirms their unspoken question, and its voice echoes uncannily, doubled between the laptop and his handbook. “Master made it so I can be accessed through Byakuya’s handbook, so I could assist him with his visual impairment. I can also access the microphone function on this device, so I was able…I was able to overhear what happened”

The little, buzzing voice trails off sadly, and Byakuya suddenly feels uncomfortable, as the room grows all the more dreary. He clicks the handbook closed, suddenly irritated.

“That should explain it.“ He sighs. “Chihiro built Alter Ego to try and help find a way out of here, and at the same time gave me access so I could be self-sufficient. That’s the extent of my knowledge about it.”

He looks up and finds nearly all of them with their faces tilted towards him, and shifts, disconcerted. “What?”

“Nothing…it’s just kinda sweet that you’re, like, telling us this yourself.” Hagakure, ridiculously, sounds almost happy about this. “You never really talked to us about yourself before.”

“There’s no point in being secretive about it. Not when I was already forced to reveal it during the trial.” He sniffs. Immediately, Hagakure looks away, chagrined. From Byakuya’s periphery, he can see Makoto still facing away, his ears turning pink.

Kirigiri clears her throat. “...For the time being, it’s clear that we need to ensure Alter Ego remains a secret from the mastermind.” She says, and Byakuya watches as she types something out, a thick line of black characters. Every few keystrokes, she stops, and deletes the last word in a series of light clicks; listening closer, the sound was awkward and irregular, each press slurring into the next key. With a slight twinge of guilt, he realizes that the cause of it was her left hand - the one he had practically crushed.

After a moment’s consideration, weighing his conscience with what was at stake, he nudges her slightly with his knee. “Move. You type too slow.”

“And how would you know that?”

“I can hear it.” He replies flatly. “You type like you’re all thumbs. Move over.”

He half-expects her to stay where she is, to ignore him and continue, but to his surprise she actually complies, standing up and stepping aside. He crouches into the space she had just abandoned, sliding his hands over the keyboard until his index fingers find the tiny, tell-tale grooves of the position keys. The size and dimensions are different from his computer at home, but for a moment the feeling is so familiar that he’s almost nostalgic.

“What did you want to ask again?”

“If it has any contingency measures in place for if Monokuma - or the mastermind, or anyone suspicious - happens to find it.”

His fingers skim over the keys, clicking fluidly. A thin line of black appears at the bottom of the screen in time to his movements, but he can’t confirm if the output is accurate; judging by the way Makoto gasps behind him, and the way Hagakure whistles, he can guess that it’s more or less correct.

“Impressive,” Celeste says, in an appreciative tone. “I suppose being such an esteemed heir means you have many talents.”

He can’t tell if she’s mocking him, so he decides to ignore her, though he allows himself a small amount of smugness. He finishes typing: “Is this what you wanted to ask?”

Instead of replying, Kirigiri leans over his shoulder and clicks the ‘enter’ button. After a moment’s pause:

“Hm, to be honest, so far I’ve just been trying to be reeeally careful with when I’m active…though I guess that backfired last night, with me scaring Aoi.” Alter Ego hums in thought. “But, I do have a secret plan! If anyone comes around who I don’t recognize on my webcam…I’ll scream super loud!”

“That’s so basic!” Asahina blurts out, shocked by the simple nature of it.

“Yes, and it’s not likely to work at night.” Ogami grumbles. “The bedrooms are soundproofed.”

“Maybe we can try taking turns staying up?” Makoto suggests. “I can take the first night, I don’t mind…”

“I think such a sudden change in our patterns is likely to draw suspicion from the mastermind. Which would be rather counterproductive.” Celeste says, and Makoto ducks his head immediately. “Though, your thoughtfulness is appreciated.”

“Then it can’t be helped.” Kirigiri sighs. “I’ll leave my door open. I’m at the end of the hallway anyways, so if anything happens, I should be able to react the quickest.”

What a crazy woman. “You’d leave yourself vulnerable?” He scoffs. After all the precautions he’s seen her take, it’s hard to imagine her sacrificing herself to any degree.

“It’s a risk I’m willing to take. Besides, I’m not so helpless. I have no intention of going down without a fight.” She pauses, mouth open like she’s about to say more, before she decides against it. “Anyways. We should avoid any mention or contact with Alter Ego as much as possible, to draw as little attention as we can.”

She claps her hands sharply, a sound that makes more than one person jump, and makes Byakuya almost flinch. “For the time being…let’s disperse.”

< previous - from start - next >

#thpff #danganronpa fanfiction #thpff chapters #togiri #<- bc i wrote this with togiri intent. for the togiri truthers #byakuya togami #the h in chihiro stands for. haunting the narrative!!!!!#i was writing this chapter on the plane with my computer brightness turned alllll the way down #byakuya can't really read kyoko's reaction and therefore sees it as super nonchalant. and i know that with her scars it probably didnt hurt #but i also wanna imagine her tearing up like. motherfucking ow??#swearing under her breath and stamping her foot while he's changing and having to play it off like she was just looking at his books #both of them feeling somewhat guilty for the other person's situation and trying to help but only by way of insulting them #like 'ugh i cant believe you. fine i'll do this but only bc i dont wanna have to deal with you' as they try to compensate for each other #sorry not much naegami but theyre divorced rn and everyone's busy mourning and stuff #naegami development: they have a moment of humility and intimacy and sleep in the same bed #togiri development: he accidentally slams her hand in the door and doesnt apologize #HIROO my friend hiroo......ily hiro and how much u care sobb #anyways im taking a break after this. sob. wails.

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kaidabakugou · 7 months

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just hurt my own feelings while drying my hair bc i thought of an angst idea and now i’m crying 😔

#kai.rambles #i’m actually so sad now #i wrote down the details incase i end up writing it eventually but aghhhh i can’t write angst without stopping every 2 minutes to sob #to give you the long story short i just think that nanami maybe left you some letters behind in case something were to happened that-#he is no longer with you and gojo comforts you through bc you two only have each other left now and he wants to make sure he’s there for you #and maybe in those letters there’s one that’s addressed to him and it says something like ‘take care of her for me’ ISNSISNSIJAA #BYEEEEEEE #I CANT EVEN SEE ANYMORE MY EYES ARE BLURRED WITH TEARS

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bachirasbodyguard · 11 months

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i think about this daily. btw

#*taking a drag from a cigarette and sighing* these guys are trying to kill me #the damage these 2 could be doing if they only knew how to care about each other in normal and less obsessive and harsh ways #that panl of sae thinking abt rin after that 'but in terms of what they (BL) see and where they're going they're miles above you (u20)' lin #makes me sick. SICK.#sobs #the way he wants rin to be better than him and reach higher but knows that rin will never do it with the mindset he has towards fotball now #remember how he called rin an exceptional talent? or just me #anyway.#i shan't talk about this nay more because i've come to understand i'm probably one of the 3 people on the planet who actually like Sae #and I have too much to say. and frankly I think i've lost my objectivity when it comes to his character but #he's constantly microwaving in my mind. constantly. just know that. i've figured him out.#when I think of sae in my mind he's always alone. and i often think of how lonely and crushing his teenage years must have been #anyway #whatever #itoshi brothers..... hang in there #the bit abt the last day on earth is from the egoist bible btw #mine #itoshi sae #sae itoshi

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someobscurereference · 7 months

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fate bad end where laslow dies is like. your name is Leo and your lover just shut the fuck down. Outwardly he's still wild and loud but it's very noticeable that what little of himself he offered to you is no longer here. He shies away from your touch. His tongue no longer weaves a single truth. You should know him better than anyone else in this world but he's purposely shutting you out. You never really knew Laslow, but when he died you think Odin died with him.

(referencing this post)

Leo would probably take a long time to notice this because his brother and sister have also just died tragically and his only other family left has refused the crown, forcing him to take the throne that never should have been his. So Odin pulling away at first makes sense or wouldn't even be noticed. Or Odin would be there, physically, and Leo wouldn't notice the emotional distance or the things he is hiding until he has begun to slowly come back to himself. Which is already much too late.

#leodin #fe14 #same for camilla and selena #camilla would be alternating between sobbing and destroying dummies so much during this time #and the agonizing decision to have to pass the crown to leo #that severa would be there comforting her #and if the things she's saying seem distant and empty? well that's how camilla feels anyway #so it makes sense #yeah xander's retainers are dead but XANDER and ELISE are both dead so that's the focus #both for the siblings and for the kingdom #and if sometimes odin and selena just stand near each other and don't say anything for a long time #but hold hands or look at flowers that remind them of their dead friend #and consider each other the only pieces of home they have left #well who is to say #my text #asks #death tw #character death tw

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elegyofthemoon · 1 month

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well. i finished ch 17 of hi3. but at what cost

#avil plays hi3 #tbf majority of me playing through hi3 just looks like This.#yes the acheron trailer made me get up and finish ch 17 #i. :(#the fight between kiana and mei was so painful :(#ok also i suck ass in the combat and i was so scared of having to restart #BUT I THINK I HURT MORE THE FACT THAT KIANA JUST REFUSED TO GIVE UP ON MEI #BUT MEIS ALSO DOING THIS BECAUSE SHES TRYING TO SAVE KIANA #AND THEY WERE BOTH FIGHTING TO STOP AND TRY TO SAVE EACH OTHER #MEI YOU SAVED KIANA BUT LIKE..... DONT YOU WANT TO LIVE ALONGSIDE HER.... MEI PLEASE #tbh. the way i was going through ch 17 for hi3.#kiana and mei remind me a lot of oz and gil's relationship back in pandora hearts but #now it makes me want to hit my head on a brick wall because #'wow. i really just gravitate tO THE SAME FUCKING MEDIA EVERY DAMN TIME AVIL STOP IT FFS'#also idk i was thinking about it too #mei tried earlier to use the herrschers powers to try and protect kiana but it wasnt enough. she failed that time #and with no other option to save her she just HAD to and it makes me HURT that this was her only option #IN HER HEAD. I BELIEVE IN YOU MEI I THINK THERE COULDVE BEEN ANOTHER OPTION HERE (IDK WHAT BUT I AM SOBBING)#sprawls on the ground #at least i can have an emotional break for a little bit.... hsr update so i can chill w that #and then when i finish catching up w that. then i go back to being hi3's punching bag #can i get off this train now? why'd i sign myself up for this (welt yang doomed me and then i got fucked over by everything else)#idk also the way that both mei AND kiana resorted to using their herrscher powers to stop the other. two stubborn people....#but its done because they just... they just care so much and want to save the other #okay yeah we did beat each other up about it bUT STILL #MEI I BELIEVE IN YOU YOU CAN TURN THIS AROUND 😭😭😭😭😭#anyways. glad i did. i have the worst stomach ache rn so i was Going through it #but my brain hit a reset so i feel normal now. save for the crying

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grumpy-nyks · 11 months

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The Fernweh Saga by @lacunafiction - Agnes edition

Who would have thought? 🤭

Agnes "Nes" Sigrún 🌑RO: James Corvin

Personality: sincerity // cautious // friendly // merciful Traits: heart // compliance // believer Past affinity: writing [horror stories] Primary ability: empathetic impressions Past susceptibility: receptive

☀️Fernweh: She never really thought about leaving Fernweh… It was her place, near her family and friend(s). She felt good there and assumed she’s gonna spend her whole life happily in this little town. Even if Fernweh brings back devastating memories, she’s curious about what’s happening in Fernweh now, in her true home. It’s always been her dream to work in Turn The Page, and during her ‘short’ stay in Fernweh, she started thinking about it again. Why not stay for longer…? She would love to carry on her grandfather’s work and bring his legacy justice.

☀️Grandpa Jóhann: When she was young, she had an amazing relationship with her grandpa. They were completely honest with each other, and she loved him wholeheartedly. Some people thought that making her grandpa proud was her main hobby. She used to tell him all about her dreams that she had, which were always wild... and also about the nightmares… It took her by surprise when her grandpa, one of the most important people in her life, started being less involved. She was hurt and began to wonder if she had done something to cause the distance between them. His decision to move her out of Fernweh so quickly after this tragic event made a huge impact on her mental state. She needed time to cope and be with her closest ones, especially her grandpa...but after all she didn't blame him. She often heard that she looked exactly like her mother…like her grandpa's daughter... She assumed he could not look at her, without thinking about her... And she could not blame him for wanting to escape that pain. Agnes knew it was the best thing that her grandpa could do for him, and she accepted it, too eagerly. She always too eagerly took the blame for everything.

☀️Beckett Warrick: After what happened in Fernweh after James she had even more trouble interacting with other people and making new friends… However, Beckett was an exception. He was the first person who got to truly know her after the events in Fernweh. When she got the letter about her Grandpa, she considered hiding the truth from him, because she knew deep down that he would be there for her if she needed him… even if he would not particularly enjoy it. It's a good thing she’s such a bad liar… Her main concern is about Beckett’s well-being. She noticed that this 'little' trip made a huge impact on him. He wasn’t supposed to be here, and it’s because of her that he–... She needs to make sure that nothing happens to her friend. And she will somehow manage to bring him back to his home.

☀️Reese Verner: They had an unconventional relationship. Reese saw her as a rival, while Agnes thought of him as a friend. She was confused about why Verner, someone of great importance, would even look at her see her as a rival. She knew there were better candidates for his games. She had only one question on her mind - “why?”. Despite Verner's playful teasing, Agnes always remained polite and friendly towards him, even when he attempted to push her boundaries. Girl knew how to keep her true feelings behind a warm smile she still does. If I can be completely honest… Agnes was rather shocked that Reese still remembered her… and was actually looking for her, which sounded so unbelievably. His concern for Milton's well-being made her see him in a slightly different light. Of course, she already knew Reese had a good heart, but his behaviour really touched her. Additionally, Agnes noticed that Reese and James’ relationship became stronger and deeper… It’s for the best. James deserves someone as dependable as Reese. He will always be there for James.

☀️Sofia Dorran: Their bond was formed over a shared admiration for books and... the color blue. It may sound funny now, but these things became central to their lives and deepened their friendship. Sofia was the first person Agnes entrusted with her writing, and valued her honest feedback, knowing that Sofia would not make her feel bad if something needed improvement. They frequently borrowed books from each other's collections. Agnes yearned for the days when she and Sofia had reading sessions together, sipping on their favorite beverage. The only issue back then was when the book ended poorly or their library didn't have any new positions for them to read. She's willing to know how Sofia's taste toward books shifted (if shifted) and how she changed as a person. She's also extremely grateful because her grandfather received constant care from Sofia and her mother.

🌑James Corvin: …Do I really need to tell you that James was her first crush? And that she never found the courage to tell him so? maybe now will be the time? Agnes and James were always together, wherever one went the other followed. They were inseparable. Agnes even used to bake oatmeal cookies for James with her mother's help. They dreamed of their idyllic life together. As friends, obviously. Seeing him again after all those years was much harder than she anticipated. Agnes felt overwhelmed with stress from the moment she stepped out of her car. Every time she heard his surname, she unknowingly flinched. Her mind was full of questions about his well-being, life, and changes. She couldn't help but wonder if he would be happy to see her. …she did manage to hold his hand for a moment, I can consider it as a success

☀️Alex Corvin: Agnes has always looked up to Alex for their adventurous spirit and their willingness to embrace life to the fullest. She has always wanted to adopt a bit of Alex' wild side. Whenever they are around, boredom and dullness seem to disappear. They both share similar values and support each other's life goals. If I would say which person Agnes was the most willing to meet during her stay in Fernweh that would be Alex. She was confident in their friendliness towards everybody and was sure that their kindness had not wavered. Agnes was touched when she heard that Alex was looking after her grandfather's bookstore… It appears that Beckett has a new admirer, which Agnes wholeheartedly approves of.

☀️Mal: Agnes has a sense that Mal might be suspicious, but she is quite naive and doesn't believe that he could mean trouble. Although she is wary of him and finds him a little untrustworthy, Agnes believes in being kind to everyone, and she is willing to give Mal a chance, not judging him by her own impressions of him.

☀️Goldie: Agnes is grateful that her grandfather had a furry companion like Goldie, who probably managed to brighten his spirits. She fondly recalls how her grandfather would tell her stories when he once had a dog, when he was younger and how his eyes would light up with joy as he shared his story. Agnes is committed to taking excellent care of Goldie and ensuring her safety.

#don't get me started how she is BLAMING herself for the situation Beckett is rn. she needs to go back for her theraphy sesions right away #that's why she went with him into the woods looking for Milton and not James even so she wanted to spent every single second with him :sob:#she's conflicted. being with James is something that she dreamed of but in her opinion he deserves someone better //obviously//#...that's why she's cheering for James and Reese lol. Look she just wants James and Reese to be happy and she can see how those two care of #-each other. She's happy : )#she's an idiot 🙂#is there a potential happy ending for the three of them..? maybeeee. we'll see what the story will bring 👀#im totally confident that Sofia and Agnes had their own shared little library #Agnes wrote a poem for James when she was young but it wasn't really her forte. that's why she showed it to Sofia because she knew she will #-help her. //Agnes didn't want to tell for who it was but Sofia figured it out anyway. they both knew that the other knew but weren't-#-talking about it out loud. XD it was hilarious -- for me and I assume Sofia but Agnes was terrified. XDD//#....cough James never saw this poem anyway cough...#I have this headcanon that Agnes made up amazing horror stories that James was willing to hear (for a bunch of oatmeal cookies) when-#-they had a sleepover //those stories were from her nightmares but she never said that to James knowing he would only worry about her//#btw her parents called her 'little star' and James must have heard it and (maybe?) asked Sofia to make a necklace... Sun and Moon.#did you know that Agnes had her piece of the Sun as her necklace for the WHOLE TIME. but she hid it away under shirt... x"D she was looking #-if James had his Moon somewhere... but she did not see it. anyway she wears it always.#omg i finally made it. there's also one in my drafts nearly finished and three more to go. XD #sooo curious about book two <3 #fernweh saga #my art?#Spotify #oc: agnes sigrun

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