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disabled-dragoon · 9 months

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The Disability Library

I love books, I love literature, and I love this blog, but it's only been recently that I've really been given the option to explore disabled literature, and I hate that. When I was a kid, all I wanted was to be able to read about characters like me, and now as an adult, all I want is to be able to read a book that takes us seriously.

And so, friends, Romans, countrymen, I present, a special disability and chronic illness booklist, compiled by myself and through the contributions of wonderful members from this site!

As always, if there are any at all that you want me to add, please just say. I'm always looking for more!

Edit 20/10/2023: You can now suggest books using the google form at the bottom!

Updated: 31/08/2023

Articles and Chapters

The Drifting Language of Architectural Accessibility in Victor Hugo's Notre-Dame de Paris, Essaka Joshua, 2012

Early Modern Literature and Disability Studies, Allison P. Hobgood, David Houston Wood, 2017

How Do You Develop Whole Object Relations as an Adult?, Elinor Greenburg, 2019

Making Do with What You Don't Have: Disabled Black Motherhood in Octavia E. Butler's Parable of the Sower and Parable of the Talents, Anna Hinton, 2018

Necropolitics, Achille Mbeme, 2003 OR Necropolitics, Achille Mbeme, 2019

Wasted Lives: Modernity and Its Outcasts, Zygmunt Bauman, 2004

Witchcraft and deformity in early modern English Literature, Scott Eaton, 2020

Books

Fiction:

Misc:

10 Things I Can See From Here, Carrie Mac

A-F:

A Curse So Dark and Lonely, (Series), Brigid Kemmerer

Akata Witch, (Series), Nnedi Okorafor

A Mango-Shaped Space, Wendy Mass

Ancillary Justice, (Series), Ann Leckie

An Unkindness of Ghosts, Rivers Solomon

An Unseen Attraction, (Series), K. J. Charles

A Shot in the Dark, Victoria Lee

A Snicker of Magic, Natalie Lloyd

A Song of Ice and Fire, (series), George R. R. Martin

A Spindle Splintered, (Series), Alix E. Harrow

A Time to Dance, Padma Venkatraman

Bath Haus, P. J. Vernon

Beasts of Prey, (Series), Ayana Gray

The Bedlam Stacks, (Series), Natasha Pulley

Black Bird, Blue Road, Sofiya Pasternack

Black Sun, (Series), Rebecca Roanhorse

Blood Price, (Series), Tanya Huff

Borderline, (Series), Mishell Baker

Breath, Donna Jo Napoli

The Broken Kingdoms, (Series), N.K. Jemisin

Brute, Kim Fielding

Cafe con Lychee, Emery Lee

Carry the Ocean, (Series), Heidi Cullinan

Challenger Deep, Neal Shusterman

Cinder, (Series), Marissa Meyer

Clean, Amy Reed

Connection Error, (Series), Annabeth Albert

Cosima Unfortunate Steals A Star, Laura Noakes

Crazy, Benjamin Lebert

Crooked Kingdom, (Series), Leigh Bardugo

Daniel Cabot Puts Down Roots, (Series), Cat Sebastian

Daniel, Deconstructed, James Ramos

Dead in the Garden, (Series), Dahlia Donovan

Dear Fang, With Love, Rufi Thorpe

Deathless Divide, (Series), Justina Ireland

The Degenerates, J. Albert Mann

The Doctor's Discretion, E.E. Ottoman

Earth Girl, (Series), Janet Edwards

Everyone in This Room Will Someday Be Dead, Emily R. Austin

The Extraordinaries, (Series), T. J. Klune

The Extraordinary Education of Nicholas Benedict, (Series), Trenton Lee Stewart

Fight + Flight, Jules Machias

The Final Girl Support Group, Grady Hendrix

Finding My Voice, (Series), Aoife Dooley

The First Thing About You, Chaz Hayden

Follow My Leader, James B. Garfield

Forever Is Now, Mariama J. Lockington

Fortune Favours the Dead, (Series), Stephen Spotswood

Fresh, Margot Wood

H-0:

Harmony, London Price

Harrow the Ninth, (series), Tamsyn Muir

Hench, (Series), Natalia Zina Walschots

Highly Illogical Behaviour, John Corey Whaley

Honey Girl, Morgan Rogers

How to Become a Planet, Nicole Melleby

How to Bite Your Neighbor and Win a Wager, (Series), D. N. Bryn

How to Sell Your Blood & Fall in Love, (Series), D. N. Bryn

Hunger Pangs: True Love Bites, Joy Demorra

I Am Not Alone, Francisco X. Stork

The Immeasurable Depth of You, Maria Ingrande Mora

In the Ring, Sierra Isley

Into The Drowning Deep, (Series), Mira Grant

Iron Widow, (Series), Xiran Jay Zhao

Izzy at the End of the World, K. A. Reynolds

Jodie's Journey, Colin Thiele

Just by Looking at Him, Ryan O'Connell

Kissing Doorknobs, Terry Spencer Hesser

Lakelore, Anna-Marie McLemore

Learning Curves, (Series), Ceillie Simkiss

Let's Call It a Doomsday, Katie Henry

The Library of the Dead, (Series), TL Huchu

The Lion Hunter, (Series), Elizabeth Wein

Lirael, (Series), Garth Nix

Long Macchiatos and Monsters, Alison Evans

Love from A to Z, (Series), S.K. Ali

Lycanthropy and Other Chronic Illnesses, Kristen O'Neal

Never Let Me Go, Kazuo Ishiguro

The Never Tilting World, (Series), Rin Chupeco

The No-Girlfriend Rule, Christen Randall

Nona the Ninth, (series), Tamsyn Muir

Noor, Nnedi Okorafor

Odder Still, (Series), D. N. Bryn

Once Stolen, (Series), D. N. Bryn

One For All, Lillie Lainoff

On the Edge of Gone, Corinne Duyvis

Origami Striptease, Peggy Munson

Our Bloody Pearl, (Series), D. N. Bryn

Out of My Mind, Sharon M. Draper

P-T:

Parable of the Sower, (Series), Octavia E. Butler

Parable of the Talents, (Series), Octavia E. Butler

Percy Jackson & the Olympians, (series), Rick Riordan

Pomegranate, Helen Elaine Lee

The Prey of Gods, Nicky Drayden

The Pursuit Of..., (Series), Courtney Milan

The Queen's Thief, (Series), Megan Whalen Turner

The Quiet and the Loud, Helena Fox

The Raging Quiet, Sheryl Jordan

The Reanimator's Heart, (Series), Kara Jorgensen

The Remaking of Corbin Wale, Joan Parrish

Roll with It, (Series), Jamie Sumner

Russian Doll, (Series), Cristelle Comby

The Second Mango, (Series), Shira Glassman

Scar of the Bamboo Leaf, Sieni A.M

Shaman, (Series), Noah Gordon

Sick Kids in Love, Hannah Moskowitz

The Silent Boy, Lois Lowry

Six of Crows, (Series) Leigh Bardugo

Sizzle Reel, Carlyn Greenwald

The Spare Man, Mary Robinette Kowal

The Stagsblood Prince, (Series), Gideon E. Wood

Stake Sauce, Arc 1: The Secret Ingredient is Love. No, Really, (Series), RoAnna Sylver

Stars in Your Eyes, Kacen Callender [Expected release: Oct 2023]

The Storm Runner, (Series), J. C. Cervantes

Stronger Still, (Series), D. N. Bryn

Sweetblood, Pete Hautman

Tarnished Are the Stars, Rosiee Thor

The Theft of Sunlight, (Series), Intisar Khanani

Throwaway Girls, Andrea Contos

Top Ten, Katie Cotugno

Torch, Lyn Miller-Lachmann

Treasure, Rebekah Weatherspoon

Turtles All the Way Down, John Green

U-Z:

Unlicensed Delivery, Will Soulsby-McCreath Expected release October 2023

Verona Comics, Jennifer Dugan

Vorkosigan Saga, (Series), Lois McMaster Bujold

We Are the Ants, (Series), Shaun David Hutchinson

The Weight of Our Sky, Hanna Alkaf

Whip, Stir and Serve, Caitlyn Frost and Henry Drake

The Whispering Dark, Kelly Andrew

Wicked Sweet, Chelsea M. Cameron

Wonder, (Series), R. J. Palacio

Wrong to Need You, (Series), Alisha Rai

Ziggy, Stardust and Me, James Brandon

Graphic Novels:

A Quick & Easy Guide to Sex & Disability, (Non-Fiction), A. Andrews

Constellations, Kate Glasheen

Dancing After TEN: a graphic memoir, (memoir) (Non-Fiction), Vivian Chong, Georgia Webber

Everything Is an Emergency: An OCD Story in Words Pictures, (memoir) (Non-Fiction), Jason Adam Katzenstein

Frankie's World: A Graphic Novel, (Series), Aoife Dooley

The Golden Hour, Niki Smith

Nimona, N. D. Stevenson

The Third Person, (memoir) (Non-Fiction), Emma Grove

Magazines and Anthologies:

Artificial Divide, (Anthology), Robert Kingett, Randy Lacey

Beneath Ceaseless Skies #175: Grandmother-nai-Leylit's Cloth of Winds, (Article), R. B. Lemburg

Defying Doomsday, (Anthology), edited by Tsana Dolichva and Holly Kench

Josee, the Tiger and the Fish, (short story) (anthology), Seiko Tanabe

Nothing Without Us, edited by Cait Gordon and Talia C. Johnson

Nothing Without Us Too, edited by Cait Gordon and Talia C. Johnson

Unbroken: 13 Stories Starring Disabled Teens, (Anthology), edited by Marieke Nijkamp

Uncanny #24: Disabled People Destroy Science Fiction, (Anthology), edited by: Elsa Sjunneson-Henry, Dominik Parisien et al.

Uncanny #30: Disabled People Destroy Fantasy, (Anthology), edited by: Nicolette Barischoff, Lisa M. Bradley, Katharine Duckett

We Shall Be Monsters, edited by Derek Newman-Stille

Manga:

Perfect World, (Series), Rie Aruga

The Sky is Blue with a Single Cloud, (Short Stories), Kuniko Tsurita

Non-Fiction:

Academic Ableism: Disability and Higher Education, Jay Timothy Dolmage

A Disability History of the United States, Kim E, Nielsen

The Architecture of Disability: Buildings, Cities, and Landscapes beyond Access, David Gissen

Being Seen: One Deafblind Woman's Fight to End Ableism, Elsa Sjunneson

Black Disability Politics, Sami Schalk

Borderline, Narcissistic, and Schizoid Adaptations: The Pursuit of Love, Admiration, and Safety, Dr. Elinor Greenburg

Brilliant Imperfection: Grappling with Cure, Eli Clare

The Cambridge Companion to Literature and Disability, Barker, Clare and Stuart Murray, editors.

The Capacity Contract: Intellectual Disability and the Question of Citizenship, Stacy Clifford Simplican

Capitalism and Disability, Martha Russel

Care work: Dreaming Disability Justice, Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha

Catatonia, Shutdown and Breakdown in Autism: A Psycho-Ecological Approach, Dr Amitta Shah

The Collected Schizophrenias: Essays, Esme Weijun Wang

Crip Kinship, Shayda Kafai

Crip Up the Kitchen: Tools, Tips and Recipes for the Disabled Cook, Jules Sherred

Culture – Theory – Disability: Encounters between Disability Studies and Cultural Studies, Anne Waldschmidt, Hanjo Berressem, Moritz Ingwersen

Decarcerating Disability: Deinstitutionalization and Prison Abolition, Liat Ben-Moshe

Demystifying Disability: What to Know, What to Say, and How to Be an Ally, Emily Ladau

Dirty River: A Queer Femme of Color Dreaming Her Way Home, Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha

Disability Pride: Dispatches from a Post-ADA World, Ben Mattlin

Disability Visibility: First-Person Stories From the Twenty-First Century, Alice Wong

Disfigured: On Fairy Tales, Disability and Making Space, Amanda Leduc

Every Cripple a Superhero, Christoph Keller

Exile and Pride: Disability, Queerness and Liberation, Eli Clare

Feminist Queer Crip, Alison Kafer

The Future Is Disabled: Prophecies, Love Notes, and Mourning Songs, Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha

Growing Up Disabled in Australia, Carly Findlay

It's Just Nerves: Notes on a Disability, Kelly Davio

The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks, Rebecca Skloot

Language Deprivation & Deaf Mental Health, Neil S. Glickman, Wyatte C. Hall

The Minority Body: A Theory of Disability, Elizabeth Barnes

My Body and Other Crumbling Empires: Lessons for Healing in a World That Is Sick, Lyndsey Medford

No Right to Be Idle: The Invention of Disability, 1840s-1930s, Sarah F. Rose

Nothing About Us Without Us: Disability Oppression and Empowerment, James I. Charlton

The Pedagogy of Pathologization Dis/abled Girls of Color in the School-prison Nexus, Subini Ancy Annamma

Physical Disability in British Romantic Literature, Essaka Joshua

QDA: A Queer Disability Anthology, Raymond Luczak, Editor.

The Right to Maim: Debility, Capacity, Disability, Jasbir K. Puar

Sitting Pretty, (memoir), Rebecca Taussig

Sounds Like Home: Growing Up Black & Deaf in the South, Mary Herring Wright

Surviving and Thriving with an Invisible Chronic Illness: How to Stay Sane and Live One Step Ahead of Your Symptoms, Ilana Jacqueline

The Things We Don't Say: An Anthology of Chronic Illness Truths, Julie Morgenlender

Uncanny Bodies: Superhero Comics and Disability, Scott T. Smith, José Alaniz

Uncomfortable Labels: My Life as a Gay Autistic Trans Woman, (memoir), Laura Kate Dale

Unmasking Autism, Devon Price

The War on Disabled People: Capitalism, Welfare and the Making of a Human Catastrophe, Ellen Clifford

We've Got This: Essays by Disabled Parents, Eliza Hull

Year of the Tiger: An Activist's Life, (memoir) (essays) Alice Wong

Picture Books:

A Day With No Words, Tiffany Hammond, Kate Cosgrove-

A Friend for Henry, Jenn Bailey, Mika Song

Ali and the Sea Stars, Ali Stroker, Gillian Reid

All Are Welcome, Alexandra Penfold, Suzanne Kaufman

All the Way to the Top, Annette Bay Pimentel, Jennifer Keelan-Chaffins, Nabi Ali

Can Bears Ski?, Raymond Antrobus, Polly Dunbar

Different -- A Great Thing to Be!, Heather Alvis, Sarah Mensinga

Everyone Belongs, Heather Alvis, Sarah Mensinga

I Talk Like a River, Jordan Scott, Sydney Smith

Jubilee: The First Therapy Horse and an Olympic Dream, K. T. Johnson, Anabella Ortiz

Just Ask!, Sonia Sotomayor, Rafael López

Kami and the Yaks, Andrea Stenn Stryer, Bert Dodson

My Three Best Friends and Me, Zulay, Cari Best, Vanessa Brantley-Newton

Rescue & Jessica: A Life-Changing Friendship, Jessica Kensky, Patrick Downes, Scott Magoon

Sam's Super Seats, Keah Brown, Sharee Miller

Small Knight and the Anxiety Monster, Manka Kasha

We Move Together, Kelly Fritsch, Anne McGuire, Eduardo Trejos

We're Different, We're the Same, and We're All Wonderful!, Bobbi Jane Kates, Joe Mathieu

What Happened to You?, James Catchpole, Karen George

The World Needs More Purple People, Kristen Bell, Benjamin Hart, Daniel Wiseman

You Are Enough: A Book About Inclusion, Margaret O'Hair, Sofia Sanchez, Sofia Cardoso

You Are Loved: A Book About Families, Margaret O'Hair, Sofia Sanchez, Sofia Cardoso

The You Kind of Kind, Nina West, Hayden Evans

Zoom!, Robert Munsch, Michael Martchenko

Plays:

Peeling, Kate O'Reilly

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With an extra special thank you to @parafoxicalk @craftybookworms @lunod @galaxyaroace @shub-s @trans-axolotl @suspicious-whumping-egg @ya-world-challenge @fictionalgirlsworld @rubyjewelqueen @some-weird-queer-writer @jacensolodjo @cherry-sys @dralthon @thebibliosphere @brynwrites @aj-grimoire @shade-and-sun @ceanothusspinosus @edhelwen1 @waltzofthewifi @spiderleggedhorse @sleepneverheardofher @highladyluck @oftheides @thecouragetobekind @nopoodles @lupadracolis @elusivemellifluence @creativiteaa @moonflowero1 @the-bi-library @chronically-chaotic-cryptid for your absolutely fantastic contributions!

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Submit a Book:

#disability resources #disability #chronic illness #disability books #books #resources #book list #disability literature #literature #disability representation #disabled characters #information #informative #disability education #disability history #disability rights #please add to this #to be updated #long post

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constantcrisis19 · 2 years

Note

would you do a part 2 to dirty little secret? maybe more angst but a happy ending? it was so good !!!

Ocean Eyes

Billy Hargrove x GN S/O

AN: I know that it took me a hot minute to respond (the finished product ended up being quite a bit longer than my usual word count) but I finally got it done! I do hope that y'all enjoy the fic! Go ahead and check out Dirty Little Secret if you haven't already so that you don't miss anything!

Word Count: 2,318

Warnings: Panic attacks, anxiety, and thoughts of suicide.

Billy skipped the rest of school, slamming the door to his camaro shut and revving the engine before haphazardly peeling out of the parking lot. He broke speed limits on the way back to his shitty house on Cherry Lane, blaming the way the world blurred around him on how fast he was going rather than the tears impeding his vision.

He hit the steering wheel. Once. Twice.

Then his house suddenly came into view and he hit the brakes, yanking the wheel hard enough to skid into the driveway. The car jerked to a stop, the only sound other than the growl of the engine being Billy’s labored breathing.

He threw the camaro into park and turned the key, the silence suffocating and unwelcome, he wasn’t sure what to do now that he’d managed to make it home.

He kicked the door open, leaving his messenger bag in the backseat as he aggressively shut it behind him and made his way toward the house. The front door opened before he got to it, Neil darkening the doorway, staring down at him with his arms crossed over his chest.

A part of Billy cowered under Neil’s stare but a much louder, more destructive part told him to stand his ground. He shoved past Neil, pushing through the space between him and the frame and only got a couple of feet in before his father stopped him with a shove, the abrupt attack sending him to the floor.

“Don’t you ignore me, boy.”

Billy’s hands curled into fists as he pushed up to his elbows, his heartbeat thundering in his ears when Neil planted a boot onto his back and pressed him flat to the floor. The man never took them off, only removing the footwear when he went to sleep.

“What the hell are you doing skipping out on school?”

And Billy couldn’t help it, he began to laugh, some hysterical thing that began in his roiling gut and made his whole body tremble. He just wanted to be done with it all.

And he knew how he could get what he wanted.

“Fuck you.” Billy spat against the dirty hardwood, the pressure against the small of his back increasing as Neal leaned down over him, causing the blond to hiss, his nails scratching over the floor to keep from struggling under the man's weight.

“What’d you say to me?” Neil’s tone was acidic, causing Billy’s lungs to momentarily seize in fear.

“Nothing.” Billy murmured just loud enough for Neil to catch, the foot on his back lifting. He had a moment to feel relief before the blunt toe of the man’s boot caught his ribs, causing Billy to curl up just as another kick landed.

“Nothing…?” Neil prompted, letting up in order to allow Billy the chance to talk.

“Nothing, sir.” Billy said between breaths, pissed off that all his plans were thwarted by his natural instinct to submit and show his belly whenever Neil so much as looked at him. It was infuriating to have so little control.

With one last kick, the man spit on the floor next to Billy and walked away, his heavy footsteps fading before the front door opened and shut, signaling Neil’s departure.

Billy remained curled up on the floor for what felt like hours, just laying there and breathing through the soreness in his sides. He let out a choked laugh that turned into a sob as if he just couldn’t decide whether to be angry or sad.

He convinced his aching body to move and pushed up onto his elbows with a groan, startling when something clattered to the ground below him. He looked down and let out a disbelieving huff of air when he saw his car keys, reaching out to take them before slowly pushing to his feet, favoring his right side.

He drove without thinking, didn’t even see the road as he blankly stared out the front windshield and pressed his foot down on the gas. He drove around the backroads of town until the sun was hidden over the horizon. That’s when he finally stopped.

He wasn’t surprised to find himself at the Quarry.

He gingerly left the car and made his way to the edge, stiffly sitting on the cliff, gazing down at the dark water softly crashing against the cliffside below. He’d never admit it out loud, but in these moments of weakness he often wondered what would happen if he leaned over far enough to let gravity take a hold of him and bring him down to the water.

Max would probably be relieved -ecstatic even- to be rid of her bully of a step brother, and he couldn’t even blame her. Billy and Susan never interacted enough to make them anything other than mutually indifferent toward one another. Neil would empty his room and get rid of all of his shit, sell his car and his workout equipment, anything to help him forget his disappointment of a son.

Billy stayed out at the Quarry until the sun began to peek back over the horizon before getting back into his car and going straight to school. He didn’t give a shit if anyone noticed that he was wearing the same thing that he did the day before, the small-minded teen population could sit on it for all he cared.

Weeks passed in a blur. He’d go to school, indulge in some mindless hierarchy bullshit, and then he went home to waste the rest of the day listening to loud music while laying in bed.

He missed having plans after school, he missed going out to your favorite diner and sharing a shake because you always insisted on it. He missed going to the movies, the way he would use the dark as an excuse to just watch you. He remembered the way your eyes shone with the light of the screen, bright and excited.

He closed his eyes as he recalled the way you’d cling to him during a horror movie, your body a line of warmth against his. He never felt more alive in those moments. Nothing compared to how he felt walking the hallways now, ghost-like, empty.

Billy saw you from time to time, but the meger glimpses weren’t nearly enough. Then you suddenly stopped coming to school altogether and he didn’t see you at all. By the fifth day Billy was ready to go to your house and bang on the door until somebody answered and told him that you were okay.

So when he saw you on the sixth day as you walked past his classroom, he completely forgot that you were mad at him and that you’d broken up.

He abandoned the lesson with the excuse of needing to use the bathroom and ran, his shoes soundless on the linoleum as he caught up to you, getting a hold of the strap of your bag in order to bring your determined march to a halt.

You turned, your face morphing from indignation to surprise when you saw who exactly grabbed you. You opened your mouth, as if to speak, and Billy frantically cut you off, not sure what he would do if he heard any sort of rejection.

“Are you alright? Where have you been?” Billy asked, his eyes searching your confused expression for any indication that you’d been harmed.

“I was sick.” You said in a state of shock, but the news didn’t make Billy feel any better. He was getting dizzy with how fast he was breathing, his palms sweating as he gently grabbed your forearm, his hand noticeably trembling as he tried to ground himself with touch.

“Billy, are you okay?”

No. No he really wasn’t, but he couldn’t get himself under control. He recognized the fact that he was having a panic attack, he’d be stupid not to since he’d been having them for as long as he could remember. His eyes darted around, moving from your worried gaze to your mouth, but he couldn’t hear anything you were saying. It was like someone had put everything except his labored breathing and thunderous heartbeat on mute.

Though he did feel your hands on him, carefully leading him somewhere as the world came in and out of focus. Billy heard a door slam open and then you both were in the familiar echoey space of one of the many bathrooms in the school.

Billy’s back slammed against the wall as his knees gave out, your tone soft as you eased him down onto the ground, your smooth hand on the back of his neck guiding his head down between his knees.

“Billy. Billy, focus. Tell me five things you can see.”

Your voice, suddenly loud and clear, helped him pull himself out of the hole he was spiraling down, his eyes finding yours in the brightly lit room. Billy found his gaze affixed to yours, and it took him a moment to realize that your expectant expression was because you had asked him a question.

“I… you.” He answered honestly. It was the closest you’ve been in weeks and he was going to waste his chance to talk to you because his anxiety decided that now was a great time to flare up.

He needed to try and fix things while you were still there.

“Well, this isn’t working. Maybe I should go get an adult-” You began to move away from him and his mind flashed white with terror as he deperately reached for you, getting a grip on your shirt. He didn’t want you to leave.

“I love the ocean. I love the sun and the sound of the waves and the smell of the ocean breeze and the hot sand on my bare feet. I loved the feeling of freedom I got from being at the beach.” Billy blurted out, his racing pulse calming a little when you didn’t try to pull away.

“What?” You asked, blatant confusion coloring your tone before horrified realization dawned across your face. “Oh my god, are you having a psychotic break?” You breathed and Billy couldn’t help the little smile that caused the corner of his lips to quirk up in amusement. Though, his grin quickly fell as he was reminded of what he had to lose, his gaze connecting with yours and trying to convey everything with just his eyes.

“I miss it.” Billy continued in a quieter voice, your eyes widening as he spoke. “But leaving Cali behind doesn't even begin to compare to how I felt when I lost you.” His breathing calmed as you sat together, your full attention on him for the first time in weeks and it felt like the warm sun on his face after a lifetime of being in the dark.

“Billy… is this about what I said when I broke up with you? Cause this is not what I had in mind.” You stated with a forlorn shake of your head. Billy used the distraction to shift closer, his hand sliding from the hem of your shirt to the hand that was positioned closest to him, the pad of his thumb rubbing over your knuckles just the way you liked.

“I miss you.”

“I-” You got choked up and the sentence cut off, the ensuing silence loaded and stifling.

“Do you love me?” Billy quickly filled the overwhelming quiet before his mind could begin to spiral again. You looked caught off-guard by the sudden serious question and Billy internally winced, hoping that his intensity wouldn’t scare you off.

“Of course, Billy. I never stopped.” You admitted finally and the ugly knot that had been in his chest since you walked away loosened some. “But were not good for each other and-”

“We can figure this out. I’ll be better!” Billy eagerly cut you off, squeezing your hand as hope that you can talk this out began to flood his system. “I’ll stop indulging the shitheads that follow me around and I’ll spend more time with you. I’ll tell the whole town that we’re together if that’s what you want! Just please give me another chance, I can’t do this without you.”

“I don’t want you to change your entire personality, Billy. I just want you. That’s all I ever wanted.” The last part came out more of a whisper as you avoided eye contact, like you were telling a secret. All of Billy’s earlier panic was now long forgotten as the rest of the world fell away, the two of you safely in your own little bubble.

“And you have me. You always have.” Billy insisted, carefully cupping your face and tilting your chin in order to encourage you to make eye contact with him. “My life without you is… there’s no words. I feel like I’m just going through the motions, there’s nothing to look forward to anymore. No more date nights, no more milkshakes, no more movies, no shared looks or inside jokes or studying together. I have nothing without you.”

“Billy… I’m not…”

“Please.” Billy was not above begging, not now. Not when it came to you.

“Alright, we’ll start slow. I’m not gonna make any promises, but we can try.” You conceded with a soft sigh and Billy’s face broke out into a relieved smile, leaning forward in order to rest his forehead against yours for a tender moment before releasing his hold on your jaw and moving back.

“Thank you.”

You shrugged, brushing off his gratitude with a matching grin and a light flush to your cheeks. You cleared your throat, glancing around the empty bathroom as you fidgeted with the already hopelessly wrinkled hem of your favorite shirt.

“How about we go get a shake after school today and see where it goes from there?” You suggested and Billy nodded, his curls bouncing with the enthusiastic movement.

“Sounds perfect.”

#stranger things #billy hargrove #billy hargove x reader #angst #miscommunication #tw: anxiety #tw: panic attacks #hurt/comfort #angst with a hopeful ending #getting together #part two #ask response

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ao3feed-rhink · 11 months

Text

Glimpse

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/KwaVSuH

by Apparentlynotreallyfinnish

It was one of those innuendo filled lines they liked to throw into videos. A silly joke that made the casual fans huff out a laugh and the more dedicated ones write Tumblr posts. Rhett didn’t actually mean anything by it.

But for reasons he couldn’t understand, Link couldn’t get it out of his head.

Words: 1374, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: Rhett & Link

Rating: Mature

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: M/M

Characters: Link Neal, Rhett McLaughlin

Relationships: Rhett McLaughlin/Link Neal

Additional Tags: Implied/Referenced Blow Jobs, a bit of angst, Kissing

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/KwaVSuH

#Rhink #ao3feed #fanfic

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fluffyblueblanket123 · 1 year

Text

Doctor’s Visit

@badthingshappenbingo

My first story featuring Neal and Christian!

Christian wasn’t the biggest fan of going to the doctor, but he understood how important it was. He would do it. Begrudgingly, but he would do it. Neal, his beloved however, did everything he could to avoid going. Especially when he was sick.

Which was why Christian was sitting on the couch, dressed to leave, with his car keys in his hands, waiting for Neal’s truck to come home.

As soon as he heard Neal’s truck pull up, Christian was quickly up on his feet and rushed out the door.

Neal was getting out of his truck. Christian thought he looked real tired. Good thing they were going to the doctor and he was the one driving.

“Great, you’re here,” Christian said instead of a greeting. “Let’s get going.” He grabbed Neal’s arm and took him to his car.

“Going where?” Neal asked in a confused tone. “I just got home—”

A cough escaped from his lips.

Christian winced at the sound. He opened the passenger side door and had him sit down. He closed the door and went to the other side. He got in and buckled up, giving him a look to do the same.

“Where are we going?” Neal repeated his question. He sounded more hoarse this time

Christian didn’t answer him right away. He backed out of the driveway and started towards their destination before replying.

“We’re going to the doctor,” said Christian.

“Seriously?!” Neal exclaimed. “This is ridiculous! I told you I’m fine—” He started to roughly cough.

“Not with a cough that sounds like that,” Christian told him. “Besides, if Jayce sent you home, you know you’re sick.”

“You told him to send me home, didn’t you?” Neal asked.

“No, I didn’t have to,” Christian replied with a slight huff.

Neal huffed too.

“Christian, I know you’re worried about me,” said Neal, “but I’m alright. It’s just a cold—”

He started to cough again. Christian was worried but he stayed quiet. Once he stopped, Christian sighed.

“I think this is more than just a cold,” he told him. “Please…just let the doctor examine you. Real quick. Then, we’ll go home—”

Neal stared at him at first. Then he sighed.

“Ice cream for dinner and you got a deal,” he bargained.

Christian huffed a laugh, pretending to think about it. “Ok. You can have ice cream for dinner.”

They soon arrived at the doctor’s office. Christian parked the car and then, guided Neal inside and to a chair.

“Wait here,” Christian gently ordered. “I’ll be right back. I’m going to get you checked in.”

Neal nodded. Christian could see him shaking before going to the desk. He felt bad for him but he knew it was necessary. He got him checked in and went over to sit next to him.

“Neal?”

“Hmm?”

“You know Dr. Banks will only do what he needs to do to help you get better.”

“I know that.” Neal sighed. “But, I still feel nervous.”

Christian nodded. He took Neal’s hand and gently squeezed it.

They only waited for about five minutes before Layla, the nurse, called Neal back.

“Hi hun,” Layla greeted with a warm smile as they approached her. “How are you today?”

Neal shrugged. “I can’t complain.”

Layla knew better but she nodded anyway. She took them into an exam room.

“Alright,” she said gesturing to the scale, “let’s get your weight.”

Neal took off his shoes and hoodie and stepped up onto the scale. Layla checked the number and wrote it down while Neal slipped his shoes back on. Then, he went to the chairs next to the exam table and sat down. Christian sat down next to him.

Layla went over and put the pulse oximeter on his finger before grabbing the blood pressure cuff and wrapping it around his arm. They all stayed quiet as Layla took his vitals. Once she got the readings, she took off the cuff and oximeter and wrote down the results. Then, Layla took out the thermometer.

“Under your tongue,” she gently ordered.

Neal opened his mouth and let her stick the thermometer under his tongue. He stayed quiet. When it beeped, Layla took it out of his mouth. She frowned.

“That’s quite the fever you’re running there hun,” she said as she wrote the number down.

“What is it?” Christian asked, taking Neal’s hand into his own.

“102.7,” Layla answered. She walked towards the door and opened it so she can put Neal’s chart into the holder on the door. “Dr. Banks will be here in a little bit. I hope you feel better soon hun.”

Neal thanked her as she left. He sighed.

“I didn’t know I had a fever that high…”

“You wouldn’t even gotten out of bed this morning if I’d known you had a fever that high,” said Christian.

Neal looked down at his feet.

“I’m sorry…”

Christian kissed his cheek.

“You don’t need apologize for being sick darling.”

“I still feel bad,” Neal mumbled.

“It’s ok.”

Neal laid his head against Christian’s. He closed his eyes to rest for a bit.

They didn’t have to wait very long for the doctor to arrive. They heard the knock at the door. Christian called out that it was ok to come in.

Dr. Banks opened the door with a smile.

“Hello there,” he greeted. “How’s my favorite patient this morning?”

Neal looked at him and gave him a hesitant smile.

“Can’t complain,” he croaked.

Dr. Banks’ eyes flashed briefly in concern but he turned his attention towards Neal’s chart.

“Says here that your vitals have been all of the place…and quite high.”

“Well…umm…uhh…” Neal stammered.

Dr. Banks puts the chart down and picks up a instrument to look into Neal’s ears.

“Alright, I’m going to have you hop up onto the exam table and we’ll get started, Ok?”

Neal nodded, shaking a little bit. Christian helped him onto the table.

The doctor approached him with the otoscope. Neal winced when it was put into his ear.

“Does your ear hurt?” Dr. Banks asked.

“No,” answered Neal. “My ears don’t hurt. My throat does though.”

The doctor made a ‘hmm’ sound. He examined his ears and then, examined his eyes.

“Eyes and ears look good,” commented Dr. Banks as he got the tongue depressor. “Now, open wide and say ‘ahh’ for me please.”

Neal never liked this part but he did what he was asked. He coughed roughly afterwards. He winced and rubbed his throat.

“Your throat does look a bit swollen,” said Dr. Banks as he threw away the tongue depressor. “Doesn’t look like strep though, so we won’t worry about that.”

Neal nodded.

Dr. Banks went over and felt the lymph nodes in his neck.

“Your lymph nodes are swollen too,” he said. “But with that fever, I’m not surprised.”

“They do kinda hurt…” Neal admitted.

“Yeah, I’m sorry, son,” Dr. Banks apologized.

Christian had been staying quiet and just listening to the doctor. He felt bad for Neal and wished he could do more to help him.

Dr. Banks picked up his stethoscope from around his neck and put the tips in his ears.

“Ok, let’s start with those lungs,” he said as he rubbed the diaphragm between his hands. “I don’t like the sound of that cough.”

Neal lifted up his shirt and Dr. Banks put the diaphragm of the stethoscope on his back.

“Just breathe slowly through your mouth ok?”

Neal nodded. Dr. Banks listened carefully to his lungs. Neal coughed a couple of times during the exam. While Neal didn’t see it, Christian saw Dr. Banks frown a little bit. He took off his stethoscope.

“Ok, I want you to breathe normally now,” said Dr. Banks, “I’m going to just have a little listen to your heart.”

Neal nodded and coughed a couple of times. The doctor placed the diaphragm of the stethoscope to his chest and listened carefully to his heart.

“I’m hearing a heart murmur but we know that you get them with your fevers,” said Dr. Banks as he took off the stethoscope. “Now, I’m going to have you lay down and lift up your shirt a bit.”

Neal lied down on the exam table and pulled his shirt up, exposing his stomach.

Dr. Banks started to gently feel Neal’s stomach. Once he was done, Dr. Banks had him sit up. Christian stood up too.

“So…” Christian started, “is it a nasty flu or something else?”

“It sounds like we’re in the beginning stages of a chest cold,” said Dr. Banks as he looked over at Neal. “I want you to stay at home and get some rest. I’ll also prescribe some medicine to help.”

Neal nodded.

“Ok, thank you Dr. Banks.”

“You’re welcome son,” Dr. Banks replied with a smile. He turned to Christian. “If he starts to get worse or he isn’t getting any better, call me ok?”

Christian nodded.

“Yes, sir.”

Christian helped Neal up and out of the doctor’s office and helped him into his car. Once Christian was also in the car, he turned to him with a small sigh.

“Let’s get you home and I’ll make you some soup.”

Neal nodded.

“Thank you…”

Christian kissed his cheek before starting the car and driving them home.

#oc neal #oc christian #whump #whump community #sickfic community #doctor #sick neal #sicknario #sickfic #doctor’s visit #scared to visit the doctor #first fic of my ocs!#i hope you like it!#fever whump #sick whump #sick #fever #chest cold #nurse

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sotangledupinit · 1 year

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run, run rogers - My CSSS 2021 Gift

hi there @ilovemesomekillianjones! here’s the fourth and final chapter of my @cssecretsanta2020 gift to you from last year! thank you for being so understanding and patient (still. because i am the absolute worst!).

also - this was uploaded to AO3 a few days ago, in case there’s any confusion!

run, run rogers (chapter 4 of 4)

SUMMARY: The last thing Emma Swan expected to be doing on Christmas Eve was last minute Christmas shopping. But Neal’s genius left her in the lurch, and she needs to fix things. And the Uber trip to get this all done? It’ll cost her.

RATING: T for Teen

CHAPTER WORD COUNT: 5,267 words

TAGS: Captain Swan, Holiday, Uber Driver Killian Jones

AO3

AUTHOR’S NOTE: The muse did not want to cooperate for a few long months, hence the downgraded rating and lack of smut. But! I did finally get to write out my idea for the gift. My giftee @ilovemesomekillianjones is so patient and kind about the long wait so a very big shoutout to her (and a day late happy birthday as well)! if you haven’t already read this on AO3, then i hope you enjoy!

***

“Oi! Whaaaz been da hold up?”

Will’s voice is loud as he slurs his holler, taking particular delight from popping the P in ‘up’. His grin is lazy as he hangs half of his body out of the window he’s rolled down in the backseat, arms dangling against the car door. Emma shares a look with Killian, their mouths quirking up at the corner from Will’s antics, and she feels a weight lifted off of her shoulders.

Not completely, no. But Killian’s words have made her feel like she’s not a total failure. It still sucks that she can’t give her kid something completely new to open, something that isn’t what his father just copied, but she can still salvage the holiday one way or another.

When Emma approaches the car, Killian a few steps behind her, she sees the kind of state Will’s gotten himself into. He had clearly sprawled himself out on the seats, laying on his stomach. With the upper half of his body still out the car window, his legs are stretched behind him, feet resting on the door on the other side. She huffs a laugh. As annoyed as she’s been by him half the night, it’s like having a big kid around and her heart yearns for Henry.

She loves her kid and she knows he deserves to have some time with his dad, but she still wishes he was home Christmas Eve, baking cookies with her and drinking their hot chocolate while watching Home Alone and Die Hard.

She senses Killian’s presence before she feels his arm coming around her side and opening the passenger door for her. “You get to be my first mate.”

“Lucky me.” The smile Emma shoots Killian is unlike any she’s given someone in quite a long time. It’s flirty, which is no surprise, but there’s a layer of giddiness to it too. She settles herself in the seat as Killian helps Will back inside the car, a number of grunts and phrases, some of which she’s never heard but no doubt are not for the faint of heart, come from behind her seat and she stifles her laughter until Killian’s in the driver’s seat beside her again.

Her seat suddenly jerks forward and the faint smell of alcohol from Will’s breath makes its way into her personal space. She turns slightly to see his body slumped forward against the back of her seat, his chin resting beside the headrest and his eyes half open.

“I thought you were going shopping?” he mumbles to her.

“I was trying to.”

“Bollocks. Ye’ve got no shopping bags with ya.”

“Scarlet,” Killian cuts in, voice struggling on its precarious balance of amusement and frustration.

“Well yer not doing a good job then, Killian. Where’s the lady’s gifts?”

“Actually…” Her eyebrows furrow together as Killian runs his tongue along his bottom lip in deep thought. Without a word to her or Will, he throws the car in drive and sets off in the opposite direction of the address she told him.

“What are you doing?” If it had been anyone else, anyone but Killian, she’d be frightened. She’d have pulled out her mace by now and worked a means into stopping the car. Instead, she sits patiently in her seat with her head turned in his direction and the seatbelt digging into her neck.

“Try something new, darling. It’s called trust.”

“I do trust you.”

The lack of hesitation takes them both by surprise. Her mouth drops open as she struggles to build off of her statement and Killian continually glances at her from the side. After a few moments, she shrugs shyly and gives him a small smile.

Will mumbles something along the lines of ‘pathetic’ and falls back into his seat, head lolling towards the window as he views the house lights passing them by.

Never before had she said something like that to another adult with such conviction and she didn’t know how to proceed. Emma doesn’t voice her feelings, that’s not the kind of person she is. Their conversation outside of the toy store already left her feeling raw and vulnerable and her words slipped out of her mouth without any filtering. It’s as close as she can come to laying her heart bare.

Her eyes trace Killian’s tongue as it pokes out his mouth to lick his lips.

He glances at her once more before straightening in his seat, flicking on one blinker as they stop at a red light. “I can read you pretty well, love, and I know you’re still disappointed about your lad not having anything new to open tomorrow.” He shifts in his seat again as the tips of his ears begin to turn pink. “I think I have an idea to remedy that.” She practically melts as he softens his tone and finally looks at her. “If you’ll allow me to help?”

The man sitting across from her continues to amaze her.

Emma doesn’t even need to think. She nods her head and says softly, “Yes.”

They drive in silence for a few minutes, Will ooo-ing and ahhh-ing at various Christmas displays before Emma leans forward.

She smirks at Killian as she flicks the music on, an older man singing about jingle bells wafting from the speakers, her mood vastly improved from earlier. It’s not until they pull onto one of the streets on the outskirts of the city, bordering the city center and the suburbs, that she notices Will perk up in the backseat.

“No way, mate. Don’t do this to me,” he whines, suddenly acting wide awake and sober despite the sway to his positioning. Killian chuckles and shakes his head.

“Yes way. You can’t hide forever.”

“I can bloody well try. I’m not going in.”

“Then you can freeze in the car.”

“It’s fucking cold out! And snowing!”

Killian grins wide into the rearview mirror, catching Will’s eye, and lifts an eyebrow as if daring the other man to fight him. “I guess you’re coming inside then. Aye?”

Will grumbles and crosses his arms as he glares out the window until Killian comes to a stop in front of a small section of shops. It’s a part of the city she hasn’t been before. An ice cream shop, wedding store, therapist’s office, pawn shop, and a comic-book store line one side of the street with a police department – not David’s, that much she knows – across the street with a diner beside it.

Emma waits to ask until everyone is out of the car, Will huffing and puffing the entire time. Nearly all of the shops are dark and closed up for the holiday except for the comic-book store which looks to be having a work party. “Where are we?”

“At the wolf’s den,” Will says angrily, shooting a glare at Killian who only laughs in glee.

“Yeah,” Emma starts, glancing wearily between the two of them. “I’m going to need more than that.”

“Come on, love,” Killian says. His prosthetic comes to the middle of her back and she suppresses her shiver from how good his heat feels so close to her. “Trust me, remember?”

“Yes –”

“You really shouldn’t,” Will cuts in, gaze now turned towards the holiday party. “He’s a scoundrel.”

“Bloody hell,” Killian calls from her side. She leans into his chest as he turns towards Will and she pretends not to notice the way his arm slides along her waist, bringing her closer as well. “Weren’t you just trying to wing-man me an hour ago?”

Will waves the statement away. “You don’t deserve my talents. The lass can do better anyway.”

“I beg your pardon –”

“Guys,” Emma cuts in. “My kid. A present. Before midnight, please.”

They grumble at each other before Killian ushers her to the door of the comic-book shop, opening it for her as Will shrinks into his coat, shoulders raised to his ears. He rips his beanie from his pocket and forces it over his head at such an alarming speed that it nearly makes her laugh.

“Captain!” a velvety voice calls out from across the shop. “Thought you were skipping out on us tonight for the cash flow.”

Emma’s not sure what to expect from the voice. Surely, such an attractive sound belongs to an equally attractive person, but nothing could have prepared her for the gorgeous brunette that walks out of the crowd gathered at the back of the store and right towards them.

It’s been a long time since jealousy held a vicelike grip on her throat but the feeling invades the bubble she’s had with Killian all night.

The woman’s legs are shaped by tight red skinny jeans and she wears a green crop top lined with white fur. A Santa hat sits askew on her head, the perfect match for her blood red lipstick. Dark hair rests in waves down her back and her nails are painted such a deep red it could be mistaken for black. The smile she shoots their way is one Emma could imagine a predator wearing. But who was her prey?

Emma chances a glance at Killian and relaxes instantly at the feel of his prosthetic on her back again. The smile he shoots the woman looks so similar to the patient, kind grin he’d given Henry on their rides. In that brief look, she feels all jealousy shrink away. Not that she had any claim to Killian to start with, but if there’s a possibility… “Aye, but I had much more important matters to attend to. Miss Swan is in need of your expertise, Ruby.”

“Miss Swan?”

Emma struggles to find her voice for a moment, feeling as if she’s been pulled in a million different directions. All she can do is fall back on her instinct to fight. “Don’t listen to him,” she insists. “It’s Emma.”

“Aye, Emma is in need of your expertise.” The amusement in Killian’s voice is enough to earn a narrow-eyed look from her over her shoulder, his grin widening in reaction. His teasing starts to bring her back to herself and she finds breathing slightly easier than it’d been a moment ago. With a roll of her eyes, she faces their newcomer again.

“With what exactly?” Ruby inquires.

“A gift for her boy.” Emma’s cheeks heat up as Ruby’s calculating gaze bounces between herself and Killian. “He’s creative. Writes and draws his own comics. Isn’t that right, Swan?”

She nods furiously in agreement, centering herself on talk of her kid. Talking about Henry is always easy for her. Not that she’s biased or anything but he’s the greatest kid around. She tells Ruby as much. “He’s incredible. A creative genius, honestly. I don’t know how he comes up with half the stuff he does.”

“Huh,” Ruby says, eyeing Emma up and down. What the hell? She doesn’t know why but the urge to defend herself – against what, she’s not even sure – crawls up her throat.

“Huh?” Emma echoes, glancing back at Killian who narrows his gaze at Ruby.

“You’re different,” she elaborates, probing even though her sentence already feels like a statement.

“Ruby…” Killian warns. “Don’t start. Get the pages, lass.”

Ruby merely rolls her eyes and scoffs. “I meant it as a good thing.” She steps towards Emma, looping her arm through Emma’s so fast that all she can do is look at Killian with a bewildered expression. “I like her.” The smile she sends Emma’s way once she faces forward again is friendly and warm and Emma feels the feeble defenses she’d built back up at the other woman’s appearance come down again.

They near the party for a moment, a group of only a handful of people surrounded by alcohol and baked goods with a stereo in the corner playing a Kelly Clarkson song and surrounded by more of the string lights, tinsel, and mistletoe that decorates the rest of the shop.

“Killian’s idea is perfect for your kid, if he’s as creative as you say.”

“Oh, he definitely is.”

“How old is he?” Ruby tosses her a look over her shoulder out of pure curiosity. There’s no judgement to be thrown down based on her answer and Emma doesn’t even feel the urge defend herself as she answers.

“He’s 12.” Ruby grins at this and much like Killian, doesn’t question it further and accepts it for what it is.

“Then this really is perfect and I have to admit, Killian’s a genius. It’s right this way,” Ruby says. Her hand gestures to an alcove in the back corner, opposite the party. The lighting is dimmer there and it’s not as loud. Or at least it isn’t until Ruby yells back to where Killian leans against a counter by the door. “Don’t let Scarlet run away! He still owes me $500! I will get my money and if he keeps running, it won’t be pretty!”

“Fucking hell.”

Emma huffs out a laugh. She has no doubt that Will was attempting to escape out the front door or blend in with the party to avoid paying it. Killian’s chuckle drifts over to their area, confirming her suspicions.

Her eyes scan the shelves before her as Ruby detaches herself. “Stay here,” she orders and Emma shrugs. It’s not like she has any other choice.

While she waits, she continues browsing. Henry’s gotten so many comics over the years from herself, David, and Mary Margaret that she can’t even keep track of what he does and doesn’t have. The last thing she’d want is to try to get him something new only for it to be what he already has. It’s that exact line of thinking that’s gotten her into this situation.

Once she bores of that, she makes a quick perusal of the store. Garland circles the shelves and moldings, string lights hanging from the ceiling throughout the store, and mistletoe is placed throughout. Ruby had navigated the two of them through it without needing to look, clearly an expert at avoiding the tradition when not desired, but the rest of the party on the other side of the store takes glee at the catching each other underneath it.

A particularly loud cheer diverts her attention over to them, watching as two of the people gripe and groan, making a big deal over it before engaging in a short kiss amidst the cajoling party. A flash of black captures her gaze.

Killian’s made his way over to the party. He stands on the edge of it and laughs as a man in a Santa dress suit with a red velour top hat places a Santa hat on his head to match the rest of the store’s occupants. Will slinks between the other party-goers, snatching snacks from the tables around the area and grabbing a plate of lasagna someone abandoned atop a display.

She can’t stop the smile that grows on her face as Will gets slapped in the back of the head by one of the women there, her fierce attitude clear in her reprimanding as Will shrugs his shoulders and offers excuses. Killian’s shit-eating grin at the scene is hard to miss, especially as Will sighs in defeat and pulls out his wallet, and as he takes a swig of his water bottle, Killian catches her eye.

Her breath hitches in her throat and she finds it hard to swallow. It’s like there’s an electric current dancing along a wire connecting the two of them, tingling her skin beneath the surface. Her eyes follow the sight of his tongue as it sneaks between his lips to catch the water residue. He clearly swallows and when her eyes drift up his face to meet his, she sees the black of his pupils swallowing the blue coloring.

“Got it!”

Emma jumps at the sound of Ruby’s voice and turns quickly.

“Need a minute?” Ruby teases, raising an eyebrow and tilting her head in Killian’s direction. Emma swallows and shakes her head.

“Sorry, what do you have?”

Ruby takes one of her hands from behind her back and offers a Santa hat out to her. Emma eyes it, popping an eyebrow in question. “Uh, I am not giving my son a Santa hat for Christmas.”

“No, the hat’s for you.”

“I am not wearing a Santa hat. I just want to get a gift for my kid. If you can’t help out then –”

Ruby rolls her eyes and thrusts the hat towards her. “Don’t be a grinch. Have a little Christmas spirit – it won’t kill you. Wear the hat, then you’ll get the gift.”

The two of them stand in a stare-down for a few moments until Ruby smirks and tilts her head, pride already making its way onto her features before Emma even concedes.

She knows that Ruby means business. Her confident swagger nearly fills the store and Ruby knows just how desperate she is. With a frustrated sigh, Emma hastily grabs the hat from Ruby’s hand and shoves it on her head, frowning. “There. Now the gift?”

“Thanks for playing along,” Ruby begins, her voice taking on the tone of a game show host announcing the grand prize. “For that, you will receive…”

Everything else Ruby is saying fades to the background as she reveals what she’d been hiding behind her back.

Five packages of blank comic panel pages, each package representing different, commonly used templates for comic-books. There’s nearly 200 pages total in her hand and Emma could practically cry at how perfect the gift is. Her son – her incredibly brilliant and creative son can actually create his own comic with ease.

“I didn’t even know anyone made these,” she whispers in amazement, her hands gently, hesitantly, shakily, taking the packages from Ruby.

“I’m not the one you should thank.” Ruby’s smile is pointed yet gentle as she gestures over the Killian. A quick look over her shoulder and Emma sees the way he’s half listening to the conversation at his side between Will and the woman from before. Instead, he keeps trailing his eyes back over to her and even from afar, she notices the vested interest etched in the way his eyebrows lift as he watches them.

Ruby’s voice breaks her gaze.

“How did you guys meet?”

“Uh,” Emma starts before she shakes her head. “He’s my Uber driver, actually.” Ruby remains unconvinced and unsatisfied.

“Really? Just your driver?” She points her deep red nails, gesturing between Emma and Killian as their eyes catch again. “That’s what you’re going with?”

The half-shrug that comes from her lifted shoulder is sheepish. Heat rises to her cheeks and Emma feels as if she’s been transported back to middle school talking about her crush at a sleepover. Not that she did any of that, but she imagines this must have been what it felt like.

“Well… he was just my Uber driver. Now I’m not so sure.”

Ruby offers her an encouraging smile and grabs a bag from behind the counter as they leave the area. When Emma twice tries to pay, Ruby brushes her off. “My little Christmas gift to you,” she says. There’s no pity or guilt in Ruby as she says the words and Emma struggles to say anything other than a cracked thanks.

People always wanted something in return. Nothing is done for free. If someone offers you something, it’s because they want you to owe them a favor or they’re using you to assuage their own guilt.

At least, that’s the take Emma had before the start of the night.

Then Killian gave up a night of potentially heavy cash flow and became her… friend. Now Ruby is joining the ranks too, helping her make Christmas special for her kid. If she hadn’t met Killian, she’s sure her pride would’ve been a lot harder to swallow to accept such a gesture.

When they make it to the party, Ruby rushes over, pulling the hand belonging to the woman who gave Will a dressing down, and steps under the mistletoe. “Merry Christmas, Mulan,” Ruby whispers. The party start a cheer, noisemakers and chants of ‘Kiss! Kiss!’ filling the store. Emma meets Killian’s eye between Ruby and her lover and they share a grin before the kiss blocks them from each other.

Ruby eventually detaches herself from the kiss and introduces Emma to her fiancée Mulan. Between the two of them, they convince her to stay an extra half hour so she can enjoy the party.

“You can always join our poker game tonight too,” Mulan offers. Her face gives nothing away but there’s something in her voice that tugs at Emma’s warning bells.

“Babe,” Ruby says with a sigh. “We’re trying to make a good impression on Killian’s… friend. We can’t do that if you’re robbing her blind.”

“She’ll count every penny too!” Will adds around a mouthful of cheesecake. “Stole $350 from me wallet already tonight.”

“You owed me that.”

Ruby cuts in, “Wait, you paid her but you still haven’t paid me?!”

“You’re practically married, it’s all the same now!”

“Actually –”

“So,” Mulan cuts in, drowning out Will and Ruby. She compromises, eyeing Emma with a calculating gaze. The woman reminds her of a general in the army, observing the enemy and coming up with at least three strategies to ensure their defeat. “I’ll give you a month. Expect an invite. Bring enough cash not to disappoint.”

Before Emma can accept or decline the invitation – though she has no clue what answer would’ve come out of her mouth – Killian appears at her side. “Bloody hell, Ruby. I leave you to warm up my car and you’re already letting your fiancée take Emma for all she’s worth?!”

There’s no malice in his voice, just a thinly veiled teasing tone, and Emma suppresses a grin at the eye rolls and groans from his reprimand that fill their small group. “I guess that’s my cue,” Emma says instead, backing up. “You coming, Will?”

Will shakes his head. “I’m going to give these lovely ladies the privilege of my presence on their couch tomorrow morning.” His wide grin breaks at the slap on the back of his head from Mulan, but neither her nor Ruby do anything to stop Will.

Wishes of merry Christmases fill the room and soon enough, Emma and Kilian find themselves heading towards the shop’s exit.

“Do you think he’ll like it?” The gentleness of his voice, the care in which he takes with her mission, lights a fire in her chest.

Her smile is wide even if her voice is quiet and soft. “Thank you. Seriously. It’s going to blow his mind.”

Killian’s response is cut off by loud cheers and chants of ‘Kiss! Kiss!’ They both turn a curious glance over at the crowd, ready to see who the latest couple caught by the random sprig of mistletoe is, only to find the crowd already staring back at them. Her head slowly tilts back and her mouth drops open, dumbfounded.

It feels fated, almost, the way that she’s found herself under the mistletoe with the one man who’s been able to turn her world inside-out in just a night. The universe is pushing them together and for once in her life, she agrees with it.

“Please,” Killian scoffs, addressing the group. It becomes clear to her quickly that he’s trying to give her an out or a reason to jump. His statement offers her the choice and that’s what does it. Well, that and his next sentence leave no other option for her competitive side. “She couldn’t handle it.”

Then he turns to her with that wide, victorious smirk and she wishes to wipe it right off his face, the smug bastard. No matter the choice she makes, he still wins. So she does the only logical thing to do in the situation.

She lays the bag with the comic pages on the display stand behind her. Her eyes remain locked on Killian’s the entire time and she can tell that he’s itching to swipe his thumb across his lip.

Then her resolve crumbles to nothing and she grasps the lapels of his leather jacket and tugs him forward.

Their lips meet in a slow, hesitant kiss despite the passionate start to their embrace. The moment Emma sighs, relaxing slightly as her mouth remains pressed against Killian’s, Killian takes advantage. He moves with confidence and familiarity. The taste of his mouth is new but the way his fingers tangle in her hair feels like his hand is always supposed to cradle her head there.

It’s exhilarating and intoxicating all at once. The sounds of the party fade to nothing and the only thing she can hear other than her racing pulse in her ear is the way Killian sighs and groans as they kiss. It’s delicious and tempting and she wants it to stay imprinted on the forefront of her mind.

The spell is cracked, not broken, when they pull apart.

Emma’s left in a daze, not registering a single moment of their final goodbyes before she’s buckled back up in Killian’s car and waiting for him to pull away from the curb.

Despite their bubble splintering at the store, a crackle of electricity, a simmering heat, still rises beneath the surface. It’s so palpable she can almost taste it. She can’t let him leave her yet. Not without another taste. Especially when he looks so unfairly good in the Santa hat bestowed on him at the store.

Killian starts their route to her place and Emma can’t bear to say goodbye to him when they pull up. Her mind flitters to the to-do list she wrote that morning and all the things she needed or should be doing for the holiday. The few remaining gifts she had to wrap, the food she had to prepare for tomorrow, and the cookies left unmade. All of the ingredients in her cabinets are new and purchased for a single holiday. She’ll never get through all of it by tomorrow.

Swallowing hard, Emma turns in her seat and looks at Killian. “What’re your plans for the rest of the holiday?”

He licks his lips before he answers, his mouth as dry as hers suddenly feels. “Just heading home to watch a few films on the telly.”

“How do you feel about making sugar cookies?” It only takes a moment for the question in his gaze to disappear, giving way to a bright grin. Her heart flutters at the sight and instead of fretting, she lets out a deep breath and relaxes her shoulders.

The house is warm when they enter. Henry’s new gift is placed aside to be wrapped once the cookies are in the oven. Their fingers linger longer than necessary as they help each other tie their aprons, a twinkle in Killian’s eyes as he raises an eyebrow when Emma’s hand slides a little too low once she’s finished.

“Fair game,” is what he whispers to her as he trails his hand up her side before tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear. He leans down to place a soft kiss on her lips only for them to lose themselves in the action. Their Santa hats fall to the ground, not that either of them notice. The slight flour that got on Emma’s hand from pulling down ingredients before now runs a white streak through one side of Killian’s hair and he returns the favor once they actually start cooking.

She gets mesmerized by the way he uses his stump – brace off and arm washed clean – to knead the dough better than she’s ever been able to. It takes a near monumental effort to concentrate on the cookies and not what else he might be capable of.

That only lasts until the cookies are in the oven and the timer is set, Henry’s gift laying unwrapped where she left it as Killian proves just what he can do.

They trade lazy kisses once she finally gets around to wrapping Henry’s new gift. Neither of them attempt to repress the smiles that bloom on their faces and it’s the most at peace Emma has felt in possibly her entire life. The only thing that’d make the moment even better, she thinks to herself, would be if her kid were with them.

Perhaps it’s coincidence or luck. Or maybe Christmas magic, as hard as it is to believe, actually does exist. Because it’s not a moment later when, at 11:43pm Christmas Eve night, her phone rings.

“Hey, Mom?” Henry whispers once she picks up.

“Henry?” The hairs on the back of her neck raise in alert and she sees Killian’s posture straighten from beside her on the couch. He makes a quick move to pause Miracle on 34th Street.

“I’m okay,” her kid starts but Emma only feels a small bit of tension leave her shoulders. “I just… I miss you.”

Her heart lurches at his words. “I miss you too,” she whispers back and wills her eyes not to tear. It’s been a long time since they’ve been separated like this but time doesn’t make it easier. “How was your night, kid?”

Henry huff’s out a laugh. “Thanks for the gifts, I know they were your idea. Also, I’m pretty sure half of this stuff is actually his.”

She joins in his laughter with a quick snort of her own. “I wouldn’t be surprised.”

“Yeah…” He pauses and Emma leans back into the couch. Killian raises an eyebrow in her direction as he wraps an arm around her and she merely shrugs. She guesses Henry just wanted to talk. “It doesn’t really feel like Christmas here. Not without you. Can you pick me up? I want to come home.”

“Oh Henry,” Emma whispers again. She makes quick work of the tear that manages to escape and nods her head before she realizes that he can’t see her. “Of course. It’ll take me ten minutes to get there. Start packing up and wake your dad to let him know, okay?”

“Thanks, Mom. Love you.”

“I love you too.”

The moment after they hang up, Emma turns towards Killian and pulls him into a tight embrace, allowing only a few more tears free – the last thing she needs is to let Henry know how emotional their conversation got her.

“You’re right,” she mumbles into Killian’s neck. His hand and stump hold her closer and she feels every worry leave her body with a few strokes.

Killian was right. For as much as she focuses on the material things of the holiday, Henry doesn’t care about the gifts. She’s given him a home, a place of comfort and memories, and that’s what he wants this year. It’s nothing that Neal can provide him and Emma knows that just turning on their Christmas tree and watching Home Alone will be enough.

She glances at the gifts stuffed under the tree in their living room, especially the special new addition, and grins to herself.

The presents don’t hurt either.

Killian helps her to stand as she explains the situation. She can see the offer of a ride sitting on the tip of his tongue but his desire to not overstep holding it back. For most of the night, he’s been making the effort and opening up first. So this time, she resolves, it’s up to her.

With her hand out as an offering, she asks, “You willing to give us a ride?”

He grins wide, leaning down to give her a kiss. “Ride accepted.”

#run run rogers #captain swan #killian jones #emma swan #will scarlet #ruby #ilovemesomekillianjones #cs fanfic #cs ff #captain swan fanfic #captain swan ff #holiday fic #cs secret santa 2021 #csss 2021 #my fics

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365runesoftheamalgamations · 6 months

Note

Trick or Treat? 🦇

hello and how are you?

Oh, I was wondering who was knocking! You look amazing, I love your costume! And of course, let's see if you have garnered yourself a trick or a treat!

[ flips a coin and claps happily as it lands on tails ]

🍬 A Treat for you, my dear! 🍬

Random Writing Snippet

They wander until they reach the offices, small greetings littering their wake as they garner leaves and papers and small blossoms the Castle allows their whirlwinds to pick up. They barely note the hitchhikers once they hit the King’s office, if only because the Captain’s familiar laugh fills the hall in gentle enjoyment.

“Ah, the Master Sable has come once again.”

Sable gives the man a tiny smile, waving a hand at Locke before they slip into the office, barely noting new faces and promising to meet them once they have greeted the King. They close the door gently behind them, barely whispering a laugh as they find the gentle King of Tempkinhand nodding off at his desk, the pen barely scratching over papers that were more than likely entirely neglected now. They walk forward, doing nothing to mask their presence as they pluck the pen out of the Immortal’s hand, a small huff of amusement rising as they see the wayward lines he managed to doodle along a dotted line.

Barely a signature, but Sable focuses on the King, sees the gentle nod of a head losing the battle against the fatigue that never failed to take their friend. They almost decide against forcing him into focus; they barely shift away before amethyst is staring them down, hazy focus barely taking them in. They give the Immortal a tiny smile, blowing gently into his face with whispered laughter.

“Hello there, sleeping beauty.”

Want to join? Check out this post!

Happy Halloween!

🪷 Neal Anderson, the Natsume Rune System

#rune ⊹ asks and answers #ask ⊹ trick or treat #treat ⊹ a snippet

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skylarmoon71 · 1 year

Text

Mikey (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles) Oneshot - Extra

"Vigilantes at it again, it seems our city has some guardian angels looking out for us. This is April O Neal with the 7'O clock update."

Your eyes are fixated on the small tv screen.

"Here you go kid."

Taking the sub from the vendor, you pass him your money. He takes it with thanks, and just as you turn to head to school, someone on a skateboard rolls past. Your bag is snatched right up, and you yell.

"H-Hey!!"

You scream, and people somewhat part as he rides down the road. You chase after him with all you have. Gritting your teeth, you try to match pace, but it's almost impossible. Your breathing is labored as you make each intricate turn and twist to keep him in your sights. He makes a sudden turn down a narrow alley and you frown. You hear a grunt just as you break the corner. The culprit is lying on the ground unconscious. You lift your head hesitantly when you make out the cheer,

"That's what you get! Crime doesn't pay."

The voice sounds pretty confident. You just gape. It takes him a while to notice. When he does. The little dance he's doing stops almost immediately.

"MIKEY!!"

"It's a yell from three other voices, and he turns.

Once again, this discovery was not supposed to happen.

"Uhhh Hi dude."

He winces right after, like he expects a scream, but none follows, so he opens his eyes slowly, peeking at you. A part of you is convinced that it's not real. Because a year has passed since you used your power. Turns out your quirky teacher was right about everything. Time did in fact reset. All the things you'd done prior to meeting Mikey and his brothers had been erased. In a way, you started over. You never pursued the boys.

All you needed was to know they were safe. You did. Since then you have stayed on track. There was still a lot of knowledge you lacked about time travel. So you stuck to your normal life. You told yourself if you were meant to meet the boys, it would happen. You wouldn't go looking. Not this time.

But here he stood. Right in front of you. Healthy, happy.

Alive.

"Guys, I think I broke her."

As if summoned they all fall in, weapons raised of course. Just in case.

"Beat it." Raph hissed. Leo gave him a shove.

"We're the good guys." He reminded with a huff. Raph just grumbled.

Donnie pulled out his device, giving your body a scan.

"Heart rate is greatly elevated. Pupils dilated, respiration is skyrocketing. Mikey what did you do?"

"I just said hi I swear." He defends.

Tears began to well in the corner of your eyes. Looking down at your hands, you flex your fingers.

"It's real."

Not some delirious illusion. Biting your lip, you will allow your body to move forward, and the boys prepare for the worst. You walk past the three of them, and Mikey is unprepared when you grab him by the straps of his shoulder. You pull down, and your lips press to his. His body is frozen and the rest of them just stare with wide eyes. You don't let him up, not for a good few seconds. When you finally pull back, Mikey's mouth is slightly parted, and he looks disheveled by what has just occurred.

"Ummm...you're welcome??" He mumbles.

You smile, one that catches him by surprise. Quite similar to the kiss. But something about the light in your eyes feels warm, familiar. It's when your head lulls that he tunes back in. You hunch forward, and he catches you before you hit the floor. Mikey lifts you into his arms.

"Why do I feel like we've met before.."

He's positive he would never forget someone like you. Especially after that kiss.

"Damn, guess ya got more games than we thought."

"Not the time Raph!!" Leo shouts.

It seems this is another situation he'll have to clean up.

"I love you too."

Those are the words that make you jolt awake.

"Hey take it easy."

Your head turns, and the dark hair isn't that strange. You aren't sure how you got here, but you know that face.

"Hi I'm April."

"I know." You turn your head, searching the area. It's obvious they brought you here after you fainted. It's an apartment. April's home.

"That was a little weird."

You've never had a fainting spell like that before. Right now though, that isn't your biggest concern.

"Where are they?" April becomes tense.

"I found you passed out. Figured I'd do my civic duty." You frown. She's trying to cover it up. You know better. When you stand, she expects you to give more of a fight.

"Wait, are you just going to leave?"

"Yes." You walk out the apartment, checking your watch. It's already pretty late.

"Maybe it was just a dream." You brush your fingers along your lips.

That kiss felt real. But maybe this is the way your brain is trying to cope. It's a bit disheartening.

Looks like you were back to square one.

It takes a few minutes to get back to your apartment. You don't want to sit around with your thoughts. So you get busy with unnecessary cleaning. For the most part it works. The last of your tasks is the trash. You grab the bag, heading for the dumpster. When you get to the sheltered area, you toss it in, eyes lifting as you stare at the sky. Another deep sigh, and you look down at your palm. You want nothing more than to run off to a time where you can be with him.

"How do you know me?"

You flinch at the voice. In the shadows, a figure walks out. But it's not what you expect. More importantly. That voice is definitely...

"Mikey..?"

It's a male, but you take notice of the bright blond hair and blue eyes. He has a similar stature of what Mikey would be, mutant or not. But this form, it confuses you.

"Leo told me not to come looking for you, but I need to know. Why did you kiss me, why do I feel like we know each other?"

This isn't territory you're familiar with either. But Mr. Miller's words echo.

"Time has a way of correcting itself."

He was right. You wish there was some way you could award that genius of a man. Because it appears time has changed, along with the reality you once lived in. You'd activated some sort of alternative by going back. One that seems better than the last. Because in this instance, the boys are human, as well as mutants.

"I'm.."

Was it safe to even tell him?

There's not much you can say, and despite your best attempts, you begin crying.

Mikey looks somewhat panicked, and he rushes forward.

"H-Hey I'm sorry!"

He's moving a bit frantically, and when he places his hands on your shoulder to calm you down, your entire body relaxes. He notices, and those pretty blue hues connect with yours. Mikey isn't sure what move to make. You look so innocent, so sad. He wants to get rid of that expression permanently. He's not sure why, but he leans in. Cautiously.

The closer he gets the faster your pulse races. You both meet in the middle and you let out a sound of utter content. Your hands grip into his t-shirt as you pull him as close as your body will allow. Mikey wraps his arms around, welcoming every desperate touch. It all feels a bit hurried. Your breaths are labored each time you part and rejoin. Mikey is the one who pulls back after a lengthy amount of kisses.

"Wait...wait..."

He's still trying to gather himself. You're panting heavily, but you don't release your hold. This seems so crazy, but when you look back at him, he swallows at the desire. Your pupils are dilated. Lips still partially parted. Leo did tell him to stay away, but how can he when you're looking at him this way.

"Can we...get to know each other?"

He wasn't sure your eyes could get any brighter than they were before, but they do.

"I'd just feel better knowing that we- woah!" You hug him happily.

"I'd love to." You coo into his ear.

"Fudgecakes.."

He wills himself not to react, because that was a little too heated, even for him.

The king of flirting.

"O-Okay then." He mutters.

A new start to a different path, you can't wait.

#mikey x reader #loss #brothers #time #trust #care #Donnatello #michelangelo #raphael #splinter #april o'neil #TMNT love #fluff #hurt #memories #ny #crimefighters #past/future #power #angst #bayverse

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spooky-fm · 1 year

Text

Phantom Thief

Ao3. Part 1. Part 2. Part 4. Part 5. Part 6. Part 7. Part 8.

Part 3. Neal Caffrey is probably a space pirate

"We are now entering the building, Neal, but it might take us a moment to find the room you are in. We will get you out soon."

"Good, that's good. You remember your promise, right?"

"Yes, I won't freak out. Diana and Jones will also hear you out before making any hasty decisions, ok?" Peter would very much like to know what could possibly make the unflappable conman so concerned about his reaction.

The two agents in question nod and respond verbally for the sake of Neal, who cannot see the gesture over the phone.

"Yeah, Caffrey, we'll listen to you, don't worry."

"We've got your back, man," Jones adds easily.

Peter is so proud of his team. They've come so far in the last two years.

"Thank you," is Neal's only response.

The four of them fall silent as they clear the ground floor and several basement layers. It doesn't take long — the whole place is abandoned, so they quickly discard the floors that are covered in an undisturbed layer of dust and debris. One of the basement floors seems well-used, like someone has been coming and going for a couple of weeks, so they follow the signs of use towards, hopefully, Neal's current location.

Neal has been quiet for the whole time, presumably to let them focus on the search, but the call is still ongoing. Peter almost forgets he is there, until the CI's voice comes through the phone again.

"I think I can hear footsteps," Neal says quietly. "You must be close."

Peter lets out a relieved sigh, echoed on two sides by Jones and Diana. They turn around a corner. There is faint light coming around the next turn.

"That's good, Neal. There seems to be a green light in the distance, is that familiar?" It would be just their luck to run into more hostiles thinking they were Neal.

Neal takes a shuddering breath that has Peter doubting the claim that he doesn't need medical attention, but he decides to wait for visual confirmation before breaking his promise to Neal. They are almost there, and it doesn't seem like Neal is about to keel over. His voice is unsteady, but it seems to be nerves, not pain or dizziness.

"Ye-yeah, Peter, that's me. Yeah," Neal pauses, like he is picking his words carefully. "The green, it's, well, it's a kind of an energy shield. Uh. It's what's keeping me inside the room. I'm not restrained otherwise, but you'll need to, uh, disable the shields. I know it sounds weird, but just," the sigh on the other end of the line seems frustrated instead of worried, and Peter takes that as a small victory. "Just trust me for now, ok?"

"Yeah, alright, Neal. We already promised to go with the flow, so we'll, uh, we'll disable the energy shields," Peter can't help a note of incredulity that seeps into the last words.

Jones huffs in amused disbelief. Diana's eyes sparkle. Peter recalls that she is an avid fan of science fiction novels and wonders when his life stopped making any sense. He thinks it may be somewhere around the moment Neal Caffrey's file landed on his desk.

There is a faint buzzing sound that grows in intensity as they near the room Neal is presumably locked in. It really does look like some sort of sci-fi energy shield, floor-to-ceiling green light, flickering with sparks of green electricity. There is some sort of panel next to it. Peter casts an amused look at Diana, who is failing miserably at concealing her delight.

"Neal?" he calls out, louder than before, and it echoes from the phone in his hand. There is an excited exclamation, similarly echoed, and the call ends with several beeps. Peter locks the phone and slides it back into his pocket.

"Peter!" Neal's voice comes through the door now, excitement almost covering up the nervousness. "And Jones and Diana! I knew you'd find me. I can always count on my dashing knights in FBI armor to save me."

The jokes are weaker than usual, but Peter is just glad that Neal is joking again, even if it is to mask his anxiety. Judging by Diana's snort and by the relieved set of Jones's shoulders, they share Peter's opinion on the matter.

"With how much trouble you attract, Caffrey, we'll soon have that in our official job description," Diana says drily. She carefully inspects the sleek-looking panel on the wall, thankfully not touching any of the small levers and buttons. "Though this is new. Usually your trouble is about treasure maps and ancient caches of art, not futuristic technology."

Neal laughs weakly.

"Yeah, it's been a while since my space adventurer days."

Diana grins at the banter, but Peter is struck by the note of honesty in Neal's words. He valiantly ignores it for the sake of his sanity — whatever's left of it, at any rate.

"The kidnapping is a familiar ground, at least," Jones notes with a teasing grin. "Good to know that regardless of the genre bad guys stay the same."

Neal's laughter is steadier this time, and Peter judges it safe to return to the problem of shutting off energy shields. Because apparently that's what he does now.

"Neal," he calls, trying for 'tired dad' instead of 'angry handler'. "You said we need to shut these ... shields off." Neal snorts quietly at his inflection. That's a success on the attempt at levity then. "Maybe we could come in through the side? It's probably safer to take the wall apart than to play with unknown circuitry."

"That would be a good idea normally," Neal sounds apologetic, "but the shields cover the walls, ceiling, and floor completely. Trust me, if there was a gap in them, I wouldn't need to be rescued."

Peter is not sure what he means by that, probably some escape artist magic only accessible to the internationally famous conmen, but he focuses on the task at hand.

"Alright, that makes sense. So, turning them off. Can you tell us how to do that? You seem more familiar with the technology." And wasn't that a mind-boggling concept.

"I am ... honestly not sure what he put in there this time. But maybe describe to me what you see, and we can go from there."

Peter ignores Jones quietly muttering 'this time' in disbelief and describes the strange array of levers and buttons. He does his best to explain what the signs next to them are, but Neal gives no indication whether he recognizes the inscriptions and terms. Once Peter is finished, there are several minutes of silence, where they can hear very faint mumbling and pacing, before Neal speaks again.

"So, this is not a model with which I am very familiar..." Neal trails off.

Peter refrains from asking what other models he is familiar with.

"But!" the CI exclaims, a bit too loudly, making Diana flinch a bit in surprise. "I think I know how to get it to work. Or, not work in our case."

"Are you sure it won't blow up on us?" Jones is not one to mince his words, but Peter would like to not have that mental image in his head, thank you very much.

"Nope!" Neal's response is entirely too cheerful. "Well, it won't blow up on you guys, but if something happens, just reverse your actions and it should be fine. Alright? Alright!"

Peter is about to ask why Neal wouldn't be able to advise them if 'something happens' and if it has something to do with the way he emphasized the word 'you' in his response, but the conman doesn't give him time to interject.

"So, Diana. Can you find the rotary switch with 'e.in' next to it? It looks like a round dial, with a lot of numbers on the sides."

Evidently, Neal knows about Diana's inner sci-fi geek. Peter smiles at how quintessentially Neal Caffrey it is of him to make sure his friends are happy even when he is in danger.

"Found it, Caffrey. It's pointing at a 20, on the right side of the dial. Goes up to 50, clockwise. The 0 is on top."

"Ok, good. Turn it upwards, anti-clockwise, very slowly, so that it points at the next number under 20."

The dial turns to '19' with a faint clicking sound and no other indication that anything happened. After a moment, the buzzing of the strange green energy in the background recedes a little, but picks up at a faster rate right next to them. The shields glow brighter, and Neal hisses a little in response. Peter clenches his fists and forces himself to take a calming breath.

"Oh shit, ok. Ok, this is fine, fuck, we got this," Neal's quiet swearing does not help to calm him down. Nor does the tenseness in his voice, like he is clenching his teeth tightly to stifle a louder noise.

"Neal!" he barks. "What's wrong?"

"It's fine, don't worry! The fruitloop just changed his freaking labels, can you believe this?" Neal sounds exasperated, but not panicky, so Peter takes that to mean there is no immediate danger. He forces his fists open and takes a breath.

"Ok, Diana, you are going to need to find the other dial switch, with 'e.out' next to it. Tell me when you have it." Neal's voice is back to 'calm and collected' — the same one he uses when he is teaching Peter how to do a particular con for an op. It does wonders to the tension in his shoulders.

"Found it, boss man," Diana quips. Well, at least one of them is having fun. "It's the same as the other one, but the arrow is pointing at a 30."

"That's good actually. Means we are on the right track," there is definitely a smile in Neal's voice now. Peter can't help grinning a little in response. "Now, same thing as before. Turn it down a bit. One notch at first, then wait a moment just in case. There shouldn't be a big difference at this level with this one, but better safe than sorry."

"Got it."

The click sounds much louder now, almost deafening, even though Peter knows it's just his nerves amplifying the sound. He lets out the breath he's been holding in when the intensity of the shields recedes just a little.

"Ok, good," Neal sounds a little tense again, and Peter has to wonder if the energy walls only act as dividers or if there is any effect on the person surrounded by them.

"You don't sound very 'good' to me, man," apparently Jones has picked up on that as well. "Are you sure this is safe for you?"

Neal is quiet for a moment, probably considering the chances that he can bullshit them in this state, and Peter calls out his name, trying to inject as much of a 'we've talked about you taking better care of yourself so be honest here' warning as he can.

"Okay, okay, I get it," he mutters, barely loud enough to be heard. Peter smiles a little smugly. The battle to get Neal to take his health and safety seriously has been going on since they realized that the conman had absolutely zero self-preservation, and this is another victory on their side.

"Okay," he repeats again. "So, this is part of the whole 'big explanation' thing I mentioned, but it basically has to do with the nature of the energy. I am ... somewhat uniquely susceptible to it, which is why it's able to keep me inside so well." Peter's heart clenches at the explanation, and Diana's face looks stricken. Has he been in pain the whole time?

As if sensing their thoughts, Neal hurries to provide more information. "I'm okay, I swear, it's not painful if I don't touch it. Which I am not doing, so stop worrying."

"It's doing something to you, though, isn't it?" Jones doesn't let up. Neal gives an aggrieved sigh that tugs the corners of Peter's mouth up despite the serious nature of the conversation.

"Sometimes I hate how perceptive you guys are," the CI complains. Jones smirks. "It really is fine, I just, the last time I was, uh... I mean, I haven't been in, I haven't really felt it at this volume in a while, so it's a bit intense."

Peter is really starting to hate the sound of Neal stumbling over his words. It sounds sincere, though, so he tentatively trusts the reassurance, especially since they don't have any other choice in this situation. He hates that, too.

"Okay, Neal. We believe you. I just need you to tell us if that changes. Prioritize your health in this, can you do that?"

"Yeah, Peter, I- yeah. I can do that. It's also why we are going slow with the dials. At this point we can probably just turn it all the way down in one go, but that's probably going to actually hurt. I'm not very excited about that, so-o..."

Thank god Neal is actually thinking of his own safety for once. Peter would be tempted to check the outside for flying pigs if the four of them weren't underground.

"Great, that's great. Good job." It's important to reinforce good behavior with praise, right? That's what El has been telling him for years. Neal snickers, so maybe he didn't do that well this time, but Peter is sure he got the point across at least.

"Okay, yeah. Let's get back to getting me out of here. Diana, you can turn the dial again. Same one, same direction. Go a couple of notches down this time." Peter is about to protest, but Neal talks over him. "Yeah, it's not nice, but being in here is also not that fun. It's like ripping off a band-aid, instead of slowly peeling it. In this case I'd prefer a couple of rips instead of a long day of peeling."

"Your metaphors are terrible," Diana mutters, "but you are the expert here, so we have to trust that you know what you are doing. Don't make me regret it." She scowls fiercely.

"Yeah, okay. Thanks"

Diana gives him a warning, and turns the dial down. Neal grunts in response, but quickly collects himself.

"I'm good, I'm good," he reassures them. "It mostly feels a bit like a strong jacuzzi, only a bit more tingly. Diana, you can go again, just like last time."

She dutifully follows his instructions, and Neal doesn't seem to be getting worse, as long as he gets a moment to breathe. As soon as the number of the second dial dips under the number on the first one, he has Diana start alternating between them, always keeping 'e.out' lower than 'e.in'. If Peter understands the explanation correctly, that means that whatever is coming into the system is less than what is allowed to come out, but for some reason the values cannot be too far apart, or the system is at risk of destabilizing. Not destabilizing the system full of unknown energy that can hurt his friend sounds like a great idea, so he keeps quiet and watches the green glow steadily lose its brightness. The buzzing sound recedes as well.

Finally, after what feels like hours, the glow is gone completely, and the dials both pont at 0. The three of them let out sighs of relief. Peter thinks that he can hear a matching one on the other side of the door.

"What now?" he asks Neal, not sure if it's safe yet. "Is it disabled or do we need to do something else?"

Neal shuffles a bit, and there is a sudden tap against the door, where he must be touching it. He yelps and jumps back, as the wall flickers with green for a second.

"Neal!" Peter's shout echoes in two voices next to him.

"I'm fine, I'm fine, it's just like a bit of static. But that would be the answer to your question, I guess. Can you go through the buttons again? One of them should be for the autostart or something like that."

If Peter comes out of this without gray hair, he's going to call it a miracle.

Diana finds a button that has 'auto-engage' next to it, and Neal has her press it before they can start overthinking the dangers. Nothing happens.

Peter is about to ask, when the door handle turns, and the door opens to a thin crack. There is very faint green light coming from the inside of the room, but when no one shouts in pain and no wall of green appears, Peter lets himself relax, and goes to pull the door all the way open.

He goes still, however, when he encounters resistance, like someone is holding the door back.

"Neal?" he asks tentatively, unsure what the problem is.

AN: Peter is having a bit of a crisis. Don't worry, it will get worse. Neal is also not having fun. Nobody is having a good time here, but I promise they will get at least one hug. Maybe even two. While they are in shock and don't suspect anything.

#dp x wc #danny phantom x white collar #spooky stories #unnamed dpxwc reveal fic #is that a bird? is that an plane? is that an ... alien?#find out at 5 #phantom thief

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