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kirschteinsj · 3 years

Text

Pinky Promises

Nanami x fem! reader

Warnings: nothing too much! maybe language but overall just a bunch of fluff and lovey dovey stuff

Word Count: 2.9k

Summary: Domestic Nanami and reader, just thinking about how much they love each other. sappy and cute stuff.

A/N: Hi! ^_^ Second time posting, I’ve had this one shot saved for a bit now! finally posting it lolz. I've noticed a lot of people have written domestic Nanami pics or drawn art, very glad society as a whole has this perception of him. it truly heals the soul I think. anyway, I hope u like this and sorry if there’s any grammar errors I wasnt able to catch U_U im thinking of doing a hc post next.... unsure hm, we’ll see ^_^!!

“I’m hooooome.” He says loudly as he steps through the apartment door, setting his briefcase down and taking off his beige coat. Putting down the grand kitchen knife she was using to chop up spinach, she rushed to the door with a smile and engulfed the tall blonde into a tight hug, saying hello. She took a deep breath, inhaling the soft scent of his cologne, the smell of something sour and musty soon taking over. Her face scrunched up and she let out a giggle.

“Oh god, Nanami, you stink, what did you go against today?”

“Nothing too bad. Just a grade 3,” He sighed “A smelly grade 3.” He sounded disappointed, probably because he knew he stunk too. Though the smell was horrendous, she still remained in his arms and he still held on just as tight.

“Are you tired? I was thinking of making dinner with you tonight but if you’re too tired I can-”

“No no. I’m fine. Just let me wash up and I’ll help out.”

“You sure?” She asked looking up towards him, questioning once more to reassure. He looked down and pressed a gentle kiss to the top of her head.

“I’m sure, dear.”

While he showers upstairs, she gets back to readying the ingredients so they could begin cooking their masterpiece as soon as possible. Tonight she had chosen chicken alfredo with a tossed salad; One could say it was her favourite, but saying that would imply that she would eat it when cooked and served by whomever. But to her, she would only eat it when it was him who had made it for her.

Y/n adored him. He adored her. To her, he was her light. She could simply not imagine life without him, not after he had come in and changed her in such a way. She never in a million years would have thought to be so in love with someone. To have known someone who cared enough to hear all about her day or listen to all her tangents, whether they made sense or not. Who listened to her talk forever about anything just so he could see the faint glow of passion in her eyes. Someone who remembered the small details in regards to the things she loved and the things she despised; Like how she hated the feeling of peanut butter on her fingers and how she absolutely admired the scent of fresh pages in a new book. Sometimes, she felt undeserving of him.

He admired her like no other. Never did he believe he’d be capable of opening up to anyone in such a way, at least not until she walked into his life. He could write a million lists, all full of everything he loved about her. The way she smiled cheekily at him after a witty remark, how she'd give every hug as if it was the last, the way she was oh so patient with him. It took him time to become vulnerable in the slightest, he just didn’t know how to do so without burdening her. She knew his job was hard, he’d told her. But rather than running away like he expected, she stayed with him right by his side. She refused to leave him over that. If anything, it made her want to stay more since she felt the need to be there for him. It felt like a punch to the gut but a good one. “So, is this love?” He had asked himself then. Nanami had someone who brought out the much more joyful side to him. At the end of the day, he knew he’d walk through the front door only to see her, arms wide open and with a big smile offering a cozy hug. She was his home. Sometimes, he felt undeserving of her.

Putting the final piece of broccoli into the container, she tidies any clutter and went back to their shared bedroom. Sinking into the bed and falling on it with a plush thump, she lets out a deep sigh mixed with some sort of a groan. She herself was exhausted from work too to say the least. She didn’t deal with curses or anything like that, but she did teach a class of 9 year olds which one could consider just as frustrating. Yawning, she checks her phone to read the time: 6:15 PM. Nanami hadn’t been in the shower for too long, a small nap wouldn’t hurt. Quickly, she settled for a little 30 minute nap. That way, she could get up soon enough to help him out in the kitchen and not abandon him to do everything on his own. She turns her phone off and slowly, her eyes shut.

…

Y/n slowly opens her eyes and notices a grey throw blanket placed on her, something that she doesn’t recall going to bed with earlier. “Must’ve been Nanami.” Grabbing her phone, she turns the screen on, wincing at the incredible blue light piercing into her skull. “Fuck.” she mumbles. Once her eyes adjust, she glances back at the screen for the time: 7:30.

“FUCK,” she says, voice croaking “I overslept.” With the speed of light, she leaves bed and runs down the hall to the bathroom to freshen up. She soon makes her way over to the kitchen silently, slightly ashamed and guilty. Y/n mumbles a whine with a frown, “He’s probably done making things now. I could have helped.”

The kitchen is filled with the delicate scents of sauces, cheese and herbs. She watches him from the door frame, admiring her boyfriend. He stood in front of the stove mixing at the sauce for the alfredo, which scent alone made her mouth water. Nanami seems to be in his own world, as he stands humming to himself softly, stirring the pot of sauce and adding in the broccoli and spinach, not seeming to notice y/n. With a final stir, he carefully sets the lid and turns to rinse his hands. Her gaze sits upon his figure, how his grey oversized shirt slightly clings to his shoulders and loosens as it goes down his body. Looking down, she noticed the bright red christmas pyjamas he had on, the ones with adorable little reindeers all over them. Grinning, she remembers how she had bought those for him. She purchased a matching set for the two of them and insisted on wearing them all day on Christmas last year. Nanami had responded to the idea with a stern “No” which left y/n in shambles. She didn’t expect him to agree, but hey, a girl can dream. However, on Christmas day, lo and behold, she had woken up to find Nanami sitting on the couch, watching the news with his reindeer PJs on. Immediately, she had attacked him with hugs and kisses and all Nanami did was sit there and accept them, secretly loving it the whole time.

A deep voice throws her out of her thoughts. “You know, it’s rude to stare, right?”

Y/n chuckles quietly and makes her way over, wrapping her arms around him from behind, snuggling into his back.

“I like to stare at you, you’re cute,” she breathes in his scent once again, “ah, you smell so much better now. Like the nami I know.”

“I am not cute. I am a grown man.”

“C’mon, you can’t possibly be saying that right now. Not while you’re wearing these pants.” She coos, gently patting his butt. He goes silent, refusing to rebuttal knowing that he’s lost. He leans against the counter, his front facing her. Though he didn’t say anything, y/n sees this as an open invite to his arms. The rope of his arms finds her waist this time, her arms in an embrace around his neck.

“Whatever, tell me, how was your day, hm?” He posed, changing the subject.

“Same old, yenno. The kids and I had a discussion today about drugs and safety. It was cute, hearing them rat out their neighbours for smoking cigs and talk about how yucky they thought alcohol is. It was… sweet. How was work for you, hon?”

“Shit.” He retorts, closing his eyes, “Work is shit.”

“Oh come ON, I’m sure it’s not always that bad, right? Say, how’s your friend doing, you know, the one who kinda looks like one of my makeup brushes! Isn’t he good company?”

“Yeah, if good company means having to deal with a nuisance to society on a daily basis then by all means, yes, Gojo is wonderful company.” He joked, loosening his grip on her and making his way over to the stove to check on his sauce. She follows, opening the first drawer and pulling out a silver spoon, “You’re so mean sometimes. I think he’s a great guy to be around! I met him once, such a flirt.”

He teases calmly, “If you love him so much, why don’t you get with him?”

Taking her spoon, she lowers it into the pot and brings it back up to her face, blowing on it carefully before she puts it to her lips to taste. “Hmm, I would. But I don’t think he’s as big as you. I’ll have to pass.” She smirked, putting the spoon into her mouth as he watched and sighed in disappointment.

He glares,“God, you’re something else.”

“I’m just kidding, babe.” Bringing her spoon down for another taste. He swats at her hand and she retreats it with a whine. “Don’t do that. You’ve tried it already, and will again when we get to eat.” He scolded tenderly, “Plus, you shouldn’t be given these privileges anyway. It’s not like you helped out or anything.” He smiled, teasing her.

“Nanamiiii, I’m sorry,” she whines, half laughing, “I promise, I was going to help! I just got a little bit sleepy and sort of lost track of time…” He turned over to her and lifted her face with a finger under her chin. Laughing, he delicately caresses her cheek, tapping it admirably with a curled finger. The blonde chuckles and looks her in the eyes, “I’m just joking with you, love. I know you’ve been tired lately, I can tell. Why haven’t you been resting?”

Her smile falls and she sighs. Y/n wrapped her arms around his waist and brought him into her, hiding her face into his chest. It was true, she was exhausted but she didn’t deem it to be anything so serious. Work was just heavy this past week from having to grade her students’ work in time for report cards. All she wanted was the best for her kids and was finding ways to get the kids out of their comfort zones enough to do well in class. That reminded her, Nanami also mentioned having a student of his own.

She takes her face out of his chest and glances upwards. “It’s just this week of work, I promise I’ll be back to normal soon. I’ve just been busy with lesson plans and activities, yenno. Anyway, speaking of students, how’s the one you’ve been assigned to?” She posed in a soft tone. Half smiling, he turned around to add the strained pasta to the sauce, scattering it into the pot.

“He’s special. Quite lively. And cheerful. He reminds me of you sometimes,” his voice strains as he stretches to grab the bowl of cooked chicken to finally add into the pot, finishing the meal, “He’s got potential.” Y/n beamed with happiness. Nanami really seemed to like this kid and if he thought you had potential, then it sure as hell meant you had it.

She lets out a squeal, “EEEEEEK!!! That sounds amazing! I’m so happy for you!” Nanami suppressed a laugh and rolled his eyes, “It’s not that-”

“This calls for a drink, don’t you think?” She babbled with excitement, “We should have some wine! Right?”

Grabbing her wrist as she skipped her way over to the bottle, he reminded her, “You have school tomorrow. You always end up having more than needed and struggle to wake up in the morning.” Y/n frowned at his words, to which he noticed and tried to fix, “Tomorrow’s Friday, you can drink plenty tomorrow, hm? I’ll drink with you.”

“Ugh, fine. You’re right. But you have to promise.”

“I promise you ca-”

“No! You have to pinky-promise.” She demanded, pouting as he stuck out her pinky finger.

His heart skips a beat. Was she always this cute? Her angelic eyes stare into his tired ones. Bottom lip poking out, awaiting Nanami’s pinky to interlock with her own. He knew she took pinky-promises very seriously despite her grown age. It was among one of the many petty details that he cherished. Something about this pinky-promise was enough for her to ensure trust onto someone, it made him laugh. Her naivety is what made her so kind hearted, what allowed her to see the best in people. He felt that this naivety is why they’re together to begin with. He didn’t ever think she’d give him a chance. He reminisced of their first few encounters. The way she did her hair back then, the way she dressed, her shy smile and how she’d look at the floor whenever she’d blush. Maybe it was her timid nature that made him fall head over heels for her. Or maybe it was her generosity. Perhaps her beauty. He was unable to simply confine the reasoning for his infatuation with just a few traits. She grew overtime, more comfortable and less shy, she was more confident around him but he knew he could still make her blush so badly that she’d have to hide her face from him. He enjoyed their banter, her company. He felt it was luck. Or maybe it was fate. Who knows. He didn’t want to think so much about it. He wanted to live in the moment, adore her in this present time. In that instance, he felt the strong urge to kiss her. And so he did.

The kiss was short and sweet, yet full of an unfathomable amount of love. It took her aback, she didn’t quite see it coming. She too stood in the present moment, then and there, cherishing the man she loved.

His lips leave hers and he extends the smallest finger on his hand, declaring, “I pinky-promise.” And a ginormous grin washes over her face. In a whisper, she squeals and scoops her arms around his torso, resting her head onto his chest. They stay like this for a while, not too long really, but to them it felt like an eternity being in each other’s affectionate embrace. He goes to speak and she feels the vibrating boom of his voice make his way up from his chest.

“I love you.”

She sighs, “I love you too.”

Turning her head, y/n smoothly gets on her tip toes and clasps her arms around his neck, giving it a tender kiss and attempting to make a trail leading up to his sharp jaw. Catching onto her tactics he laughs, putting his big hand against her face and pushing her back.

“Seriously?” He chuckles, “You couldn’t wait till after dinner? Come on, take out the plates.”

“Wait for what? I was just kissing you! You’re so dramatic, Nami.” She lies, playing innocent. She knew damn well what she was trying to do. She wasn’t going to admit to it though. Taking out the plates and utensils, she readied the table.

…

After dinner and meaningless conversation, the two lovers tidied and headed towards their room. “Do yo wana wah a mohee tomowwow nie?” Y/n proposed from the bathroom as she brushed her teeth. He perks his head up, confused, “Do I want to what?” She spat into the sink and rinsed her mouth, repeating her question.

“I said, do you wanna watch a movie tomorrow night? Like at home? There’s this documentary I saw on Netflix, it looks really good! It’s crime related.”

“That sounds fine with me. Though, that’s only possible if you don’t end up drinking too much. I always have to get you to sleep early when you drink.” He states nonchalantly, nose poked into a thick book. She rolls her eyes and smiles, “I promise I won’t drink all that much.” Shifting his book to the opposing hand, Nanami silently takes his pinky finger and holds it out to y/n. She snickers and reciprocates.

“You’ve now pinky-promised. Don’t break it, y/n.”

“I never do.”

The nightstand lamp illuminates the room with a soft yellow glow. Shadows of objects on the nightstand hang on the walls. Laying in bed on her phone, y/n turns over to Nanami, who was still reading his book. “Nami, come lay next to me, I wanna cuddle. Please?” Her voice faint. He looks down at her and puts his book away immediately. He could use a cuddle too. Bringing himself down, he lays on his back, y/n closing the gap between the two. Their legs intertwine, her arm and head resting on his chest while one of his hands rested on her bum, the other dotingly playing with her hair. Neither of them spoke a word for a while. Until y/n broke the silence.

“So, were there no other pairs of pants you had left to wear or-”

“Please, be quiet.”

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wordupcomics · 3 years

Note

We would like to see more about the adventures of the boys (Violet, Scoops, Becky and Tobey) when they were teenagers we really love to see our favorite team interacting with each other 💗

Hey Anon! Sorry this took so long! It took me a while to think of things and then when I did I wanted to draw them but by that point I'd already kept you waiting for a while so I only have two drawings but I have a lot of ideas I will share through text instead!

First lets do the moment with the drawings

So it starts with the gang as teenagers, all four of them in detention. The girls and the boys got detention for different reasons, and ask the other why they are there. First Becky and Violet ask Tobey and Scoops why they're there. It's a long answer, so I'll just have Becky sum it up for you

Becky:...So...let me get this straight...Scoops saw Mr. Smith and Mrs. Stevens kissing in the parking lot, and decided to right an article about it and why we should remain loyal to our partners...and then Tobey pointed out that if anyone saw that article he could damage Mr. Smith and Mrs. Stevens marriages and get in trouble. So to avoid getting in trouble you two decided to flush the article down one of the toilets in the boys locker room and it clogged the pipes and flooded the boys locker room and you two got detention for causing damage to school property????

Tobey: Yes we hear the irony that we did that to avoid Scoops getting in trouble and then ultimately got in trouble because of it

Becky: Not even on my list of concerns right now. First of all...why did you have to destroy the article? Why couldn't you have just not published it? You could have hidden it or thrown it away?

Violet: No they should have recycled it!

Scoops: What if I recycled it and someone found it? Or what if I lost it and someone found it? it would spread like wildfire!

Becky: Okay, but why flush it down the toilet??? You could have shred it?

Violet: Or painted over it!

Becky: Or used one of Tobey's robots to destroy it

Violet: Or you guys could have thrown it in my fire pit when you came over next weekend to roast marshmallows!

Tobey and Scoops (realizing they're right): ...

Becky: And secondly (Looks to Violet as they both try to choke down a laugh) Mr. Smith and Mrs. Stevens are married

Scoops: I know, that's why I wrote an article on cheating Becky!

Violet: No, you guys, they're married to each other

Tobey and Scoops: ...What..??

Becky: Mrs. Stevens wanted to keep her last name so she never changed it

Violet: They've been happily married for twenty years

(Tobey and Scoops then realize they got detention for basically no reason at all as Becky and Violet burst out laughing):

Tobey: Oh yeah! And why are you two here, hmm? What bad thing could the two most rule-following students in the school have possibly done to end up in detention with us?

Becky and Violet (paniced): No reason

Scoops: No no no! We told you, now you gotta tell us! What'd you two do?

Violet: ....Well...Becky brought her laptop to school today so we could look at Pretty Princess fanart at lunch...

Scoops: At lunch? A teacher shouldn't give you detention for goofing off on a computer at lunch

Becky: Yeah the problem wasn't when we were looking at it...the problem was the particular fanart that just happened to be on the computer when the teacher passed by...

Tobey: ... What in the world kind of fanart were you two looking at?????

Becky: We were just looking at normal fanart! As it turns out some people one the internet are...messed up and we accidentally ran into some fanart that...um...

Violet: Will haunt my nightmares for the rest of my life...

Becky: and was ultimately deemed "highly inappropriate" by the teacher...

(Tobey and Scoops then burst out laughing):

I'm gonna put some more scenarios under the cut!

Becky begged Tobey to read this amazing book she just loves:

Becky: Have you read it yet?! Wasn't it amazing?!

Tobey: ...Becky you are one of my dearest friends but I have to be honest with you-This was the worst book I have ever had the displeasure to read

Becky: (Yanks the book out of Tobey's hands and "covers it's ears") (Gasps) IT CAN HEAR YOU!!!

Tobey: ....please see a shrink...

Mrs. McCallister is finally ready for Tobey to meet her new boyfriend and Tobey is super nervous. Scoops gets this idea that he'll look up the guy in the phone book, call him, and pretend he's randomly interviewing people on the phone for a school article, when instead he's actually getting information Tobey needs to get to know the guy better so he knows what to expect (fun fact: this man would later become Tobey's stepdad, his name is Alex). Scoops has the phone on speaker so Tobey can hear

After a bunch of oddly specific questions:

Alex, on the other end: ...Are you a friend of Claire's boy, Tobey?

Scoops: ...

Alex: ...

Tobey: ...

Scoops: Bye! (hangs up in panic)

Tobey: SCOOPS!

Scoops: He was on to us! I panicked! What was I supposed to do???

Tobey: NOT THAT! YOU MAY AS WELL HAVE SAID YES!

Scoops wrote an article about WordGirl. He didn't see anything wrong with it...Becky did...

Becky: How could you say that about me!?

Scoops: I didn't think you'd care!

Becky: Well I do!

Scoops: I'm sorry, Becky. I didn't know you felt so insecure about this or I never would have written it, I promise!

Becky: Insecure! I am NOT insecure!

Scoops (raising an eyebrow): ... define insecure

Becky: ...

Scoops: ...

Becky: I'm leaving! (leaves)

Tobey is in the park reading, Violet is also at the park, doing an art show. She walks up to Tobey all sad and sits next to him

Violet: Hi..

Tobey: What's the matter?

Violet: Someone came to my art show and said he thought all my art was terrible...

Tobey: ...Who in the world would say such a thing???

Violet: That guy over there...

Tobey: You know he's probably just jealous of how talented you are and is masking his insecurities behind rude comments

Violet: ... You really think so?

Tobey: Oh yes, I used to do it all the time..I still catch myself doing it to be honest

Violet: Well now I feel bad for him..

Tobey: Well there's nothing you can do about him, so if I were you I'd just go and continue your art show like normal

Violet: You're right Tobey! Thanks! (leaves for her art show)

Tobey: (pulls out his remote) Insult my dear innocent friend? Not on my watch

Becky and Violet talking about Pretty Princess

Becky: I mean...I know none of it is canon but it's still a good idea right?

Violet: Becky! This is the best AU idea I've ever heard!

Becky: (gasps) I'll write fanfiction for it and you draw fanart for it?

Violet: YES!

Becky and Violet: (Excited screams)

Tobey, now officially having given up crime, is doing community service (of his own volition) to make up for his past actions. Becky, Scoops and Violet come up

Becky: How's community service going?

Tobey: It's awful! But I'm glad I'm doing it

Violet: Want some help?

Tobey: No, it wouldn't feel right

Scoops: Well, can we just sit here and keep you company then?

Tobey: ... Of course!

In high school, Violet got into acting and often performed in school plays. Her first play ever she invited all her friends to come see, and of course they were happy to watch her have fun on stage! However when they saw the play it was....horrendous. Worst thing they'd ever seen. After the play was over Violet happily came over to ask them what they thought of it. Important note: Violet and Scoops were dating at the time

Tobey, seeing Violet coming: What do I do??? I can't tell Violet it was terrible! It would break her heart! But I can't lie to her either! That's wrong!

Becky: Tobey, relax, just do what I do

Violet: Hey guys! What'd you think?

Becky: you looked like you were having so much fun!

Tobey and Scoops: Yeah you did!

Violet: I was! But what did you think of the play itself?

Becky: ...Well...honestly you guys mispronounced so many words I couldn't really enjoy it. I mean it's not your fault, no one uses those words anymore but you know...I know how they're pronounced and can't stand when words are pronounced wrong so...

Violet: Oh that makes sense! We'll work on that! Maybe you can tell me how to pronounce them!

Becky: Sure!

Violet: Tobey what did you think?

Tobey: Um...I wasn't really a fan of the genre so I probably didn't enjoy it as much as I could have

Violet: Oh, what kind of genres do you like?

Tobey: ....a consistent one...

Violet: (laughs) You're so silly Tobey! Scoops! What'd you think?

Scoops: ... Um... I loved it of course! I mean, you were in it! And I love you! So how could I not love it!

Becky, having learned from the WordGirl stuff, later told Violet the truth and explained that she didn't like the play at all and only liked that Violet seemed so happy doing it. Violet took this well. Tobey and Scoops however...:

Scoops: PROBLEM PROBLEM PROBLEM!

Tobey: What?

Scoops: The school paper wants me to review the school play! I can't say it was good, that goes against my oath as a reporter! But I can't say it was bad either, I already told Violet I loved it!

Tobey: Ask someone else to do it

Scoops: No one else has the time to take on any more assignments! What am I gonna do?! I don't wanna upset Violet!

Tobey: um...uh...could you post it anonymously?

Those actions eventually lead to Scoops and Violet breaking up (don't worry, they did get back together years later)

Scoops took his and Violet's break up particularly hard, and Tobey tried to cheer him up by finding weird things happening in the city for Scoops to write about. It didn't help a whole lot, but Scoops appreciated Tobey trying to cheer him up. Meanwhile Becky, who by this point all her friends knew she was WordGirl, essentially tried to fix Scoops and Violet's now ended relationship, and between trying to help them, school work, hero work and family life, she ended up stretching herself a little too thin to the point that all her friends had to do an intervention and tell her to stop because it wasn't good for her.

I've mentioned before that Becky's necklace in Word Up in significant and special to her. This necklace was actually made by Scoops, Violet and Tobey. Note the fact that her friends made it isn't the reason it's so important to her, but it is sweet they took the time to make it for her.

For one of his birthdays Tobey invited his friends to a demolition derby. When his friends said they thought it odd he'd be into that, he stated it was his new outlet for seeing destruction now that he was no longer doing crime.

Hmm that's all I have for now! If you are wanting more and have any particular questions or ideas, feel free to send more asks! If they are a little more specific I'll probably get to them a little sooner

#wordgirl #word up #becky botsford #tobey mccallister #violet heaslip #todd scoops ming #scoops ming

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my-arlington-academia · 3 years

Text

Cliffany part 2

O-kay, and that’s it! I don’t know if I’ll write a continuation tbh since it was just a silly little idea that came out of nowhere. (Although I did have some ideas for more!) I haven’t really been active on my fanblog lately so it’s not like it’ll make much of a difference though haha. By the way, I’m thinking about making my blog more "Dulcet-oriented" rather than just SE. I hope you guys don’t mind? Recently, I’ve been getting more and more into Black Tarot! So expect my blog to change a lil 🔮🕯🌌

--------------------

It had been a couple of days now since Tiffany’s last interaction with Claire, and while she was still ignoring her like before, Tiffany’s efforts in doing so had increased. The moment she spotted her in the corner of her eye, she would move at a faster pace, as if running away. Was it guilt after all? No, she just didn’t have the energy to deal with Claire’s annoying and unnecessary empathy. The empathy that she knew she didn’t deserve which made her feel even more frustrated towards Claire.

All she should be worried about right now is getting more followers on Instaglam, not avoiding a nobody like the plague. On that note, spring was coming soon, the flowers started to blossom and the days were getting longer which meant... that the "cottagecore" tag on insta would go trending soon, no doubt! And of course, living on the Arlington campus as one of its students, this gave Tiffany the access to its beautiful garden. Although honestly, she only ever went there to take pictures and this time wasn’t any different. She had prepared some tea sets and dresses for the occasion, all of which she would throw away once spring went away along with its "trends."

Carried by her confident footsteps, she walked to the garden. That confidence was only a facade though. She knew exactly what kind of people and who in particular went to take strolls quite often in this goddamn garden. But hey, it was 7pm and the sun would soon start to set. Knowing that Claire always arrives 15 minutes in advance to any meeting and most likely always wakes up at 6am, there was nothing to be worried about. Chances are, she was either doing her homework before going to bed like a goody-two-shoes or watering her weird-ass plants. Tiffany always had the horror of seeing these at Raquel’s parties. It just didn’t fit at all with the rest of what was going on in the room and ruined the whole "party" vibe.

In any case, there she was, searching for a good spot to take pictures and set up a fake picnic. That basket filled with different colored blankets, tea sets, biscuits, tea and a pie was way heavier than Tiffany had initially thought. Maybe she really should’ve asked for collab pictures with Trisha from the fine arts department. She didn’t really like her but when it came to follower count they were surprisingly close, although Tiffany was still number one of course. Still, if she had asked for a collab they could’ve carried those heavy props together.

After finding a good spot next to the pond, Tiffany set everything up in an aesthetically pleasing manner and got down to taking the pictures. She was taking different shots to post them one by one throughout the week and give out the illusion that she was taking those the same day she posted them. She was ready to upload the first one, call it a day and go back to the dorms without touching any of the tea or cakes. It’s all just useless calories anyways. As she was putting the tags on the picture, she started wondering what were the names of those flowers in the background.

"Ugh, fuck. What are those orange shits called again?"

"Marigolds."

"Ah right, thank y-"

Tiffany immediately snapped her head back. This annoyingly gentle voice could only belong to one person.

"...What the fuck, Claire. Where did you pop out from?!"

There’s no was she was there the whole time, right? It’s true that Tiffany could get lost in what she was doing once she was focused but it wasn’t to the point where she became completely unaware of her surroundings.

"I came by a few minutes ago... Y-you looked so invested in what you were doing that I didn’t want to bother you! I didn’t mean to pry."

Well, Tiffany could always upload those damn pictures from her room. Claire’s arrival just meant that it was time for her to leave. However, seeing that Tiffany started packing up her things, Claire panicked thinking that it’s her fault. Which was in fact, her fault... in a way.

"O-oh! You’re not going to finish your picnic? I’m so sorry, I’ll just leave! Throwing all of this good food away would be such a waste-"

"Are you fucking dumb?"

Did she not get that this was all only a set-up for taking pictures? It was obvious that Tiffany didn’t have any intention of eating or drinking any of that. Not to mention that after everything that happened the other day, she was still not scared of approaching her?

"I don’t give a damn about the food, it was just for my social media accounts you dumb bit- ... dimwit. I was already done anyway so you don’t have anything to do with the fact that I’m leaving."

"I see! T-then maybe I can help?!"

Help? What did Claire even know about- Actually, on second thought. This whole "cottagecore" shtick was a great fit for Claire. She probably already had all of the things Tiffany bought last week for those pictures, even better and more authentic-looking ones probably. This was maybe the one and only time Tiffany would let Claire "help" her. But from her point of view, she was mostly just using her.

"Hm. Is that so? How can you help me then... Claire."

"Wait just a second! I’ll be back right away!!!"

She ran immediately towards the dorms. Well, she'll probably bring a bunch of random stuff. In the end, Tiffany was really torn between the idea of staying and waiting for who knows how long and the idea of leaving right now. Surely, Claire would make a hilarious expression when she’d realize that she was played with and abandoned. While trying to laugh it off, Tiffany accidentally remembered what happened a few days ago, along with Claire’s crying face. Damn... Okay, fine. She’ll wait for her but only because it would be annoying if she bawled again like a damn toddler.

And so she waited until, from the corner of her eyes, she saw a girl with a pink dress running towards her. That girl, of course, being Claire. She carried a picnic basket with her too, but much bigger and more practical. For half a second, Tiffany thought that Claire actually looked maybe, just maybe, a little bit pretty. She erased the thought in a hurry, covering it with harsh words as usual.

"Wh-why did you change your clothes? You think I’m gonna take pictures of you?"

"Ah, no, well..."

Claire looked at the beautiful picnic set-up and the cyan dress Tiffany was wearing.

"I just wanted to fit in with the rest of what you put up, I guess. Also, don’t you think that we kinda match? I brought some of the cookies I baked and my favorite teas and tea set. I think mine will look better with your picnic blanket! Uh- N-not to say that yours looks bad!!!"

She was trying so hard to make herself likable that it was painful to see... and kinda cute. God, Tiffany was really hating her thoughts today. She was just going soft because of Claire’s aura or something. Again, this was definitely the first and last time she was letting Claire help her with anything. I’d be bad if she turns completely brain-dead and clueless like her.

"...Whatever. Show me what you got. I’ll decide if it’s good enough."

Claire was pulling everything out of the basket one by one. Everytime, better and better items were pulled out after the other. Her cakes and cookies gave off a "homey" feeling which was more fitting with the aesthetic rather than Tiffany’s store bought patisseries. Claire was staring at her, wide-eyed and excited.

"W-what do you think, Tiffany? It looks good, doesn’t it?!"

"Uh. Yeah, it’s fine, I guess. I’ll take a few pics."

That was a lie. This looked so much better than the try-hard bullshit Tiffany had done. She was good at riding on the "trend wave" but Claire was a natural when it came to this one specific thing. Tiffany was trying to look as poker-faced as she could so as to not show her satisfaction, but clearly, her apparent enthusiasm for each shot was betraying her. Sometimes, she would accidentally take one with Claire in the shot and ask her to move.

"Hey. You’re ruining the picture with your ugly fac- dress. Move to the right."

Before Tiffany could even do anything about it, Claire was already pouring some tea into 2 cups.

"Woah woah woah, put the teapot down. I didn’t agree to this."

"But...This is a kettle, Tiffany. Not a teapot."

"Oh, shut it!"

Claire gave off such a dejected face that Tiffany, once again, felt like she was kicking a poor puppy to the ground. She held back on going off on a rant.

"But we’re already here and the weather is so nice! It would be such a shame not to use any of this at all..."

Claire looked around, observing this beautiful setting, not to mention, the sun was finally starting to set. Going home right now would be like an insult to the utter beauty of this scene, it almost looked like it came right out of a fairy tale picture book. Without mulling it over any further, Tiffany took a sip out of her cup.

"I’m only doing this because I feel compelled to, got it?"

Claire’s eyes lit up nonetheless.

"Alright! Please try out my cookies too!"

Tiffany contemplated them for a second... is it true that home-made stuff is more healthy? Surely, that’s just a myth, right? A cake from the store and a home-made cake will have about the same amount of sugar in them regardless of who made them and how. Well, she did see Claire share her food from time to time with her friends and while she would never admit it, it is true that she was a bit curious about trying them herself. What was the last time she had eaten anything "home-made"? Or did it ever even happen?

"...Okay, whatever. I bet they taste shitty."

Tiffany reluctantly took a bite... It was surprisingly really delicious!

"It’s bad."

"R-really?"

As much as she wanted to lie about it, she couldn’t after seeing Claire make that dejected face again.

"Uhhh. No, um. Hmm... On second thought, it’s pretty average. It’s okay-ish."

Tiffany really hated herself right now. Being mean has never been this hard before. She couldn’t wait for the moment where they would be done with this ridiculous play-pretend and go back to her room. She tried drinking and eating as fast as she could without making it look like she was in a hurry to run away from this awkward situation. And God, it was so fucking hard...

Unsurprisingly, they were both pretty silent the whole time. Well, it wasn’t like they had anything to converse about or things in common. Right as Tiffany was about to get up and pack up her belongings, for real this time, Claire spoke up. Nervously fiddling with the hem of her dress.

"Um. So you know, I have something to confess to you, Tiffany."

Oh God, not now. As much as Tiffany found this timing annoying, she couldn’t help but poke fun at that poor choice of words.

"Confess? Oh my, so you like me in that way, huh? That explains everything."

"Wha- N-no! That’s not it! I mean, realistically speaking, t-that would never even happen!"

Was she implying that she could never like someone like Tiffany? Well, Tiffany herself was the one who brought this up but she was a bit offended at that statement. Regardless though, the way she was trying to deny it so hard was kinda cute. No. Not cute at all! If this went on, Tiffany would really become crazy before the end of this day.

"Last time, you said that I was only being kind towards others to profit off of them and I didn’t say anything but... that wasn’t true at all! I always wanted to help you because I thought that you needed it, I swear. Not to satisfy myself! ... Well. Except maybe..."

"Except...?"

"T-today. I admit that I kind of had ulterior motives."

Now that piqued Tiffany’s curiousness right away. Suddenly, she didn’t want to leave as much anymore if it meant that Claire would finally admit that she did some things for her own benefit. Why was it? Did she want to post a picture of herself on Tiffany’s Instaglam to fish for compliments, knowing that she had a lot of followers? Claire hid her face behind her hands and muttered a few words.

"I... wanted you to warm up to me."

"...Huh?"

That’s it? That was it? Claire’s ulterior motive was for Tiffany to "warm up to her."?

"So like, you want us to be friends or some shit?"

"Oh no! Not necessarily that far, just... good acquaintances!"

Is she stupid? There’s no way that she genuinely thinks those "motives" are bad. Tiffany sighed in exasperation.

"Listen. I’m just really tired right now, I don’t have the energy to assimilate all the shit you’re saying. I’m packing all of this up and going back to the dorms."

In complete silence, they gathered all of their belongings and walked to the dorms while keeping a fair distance between the 2 of them. As if to say, "we’ve got nothing to do with each other." Surprisingly, Claire didn’t try anything anymore. Didn’t even wish for a "good night" or a "good evening" which was weird to say the least. Tiffany tried to ignore it and when she got back and unpacked all of the props, she noticed something that didn’t belong to her. One of Claire’s lunch boxes with cookies in them and... a note?

Here’s my number just in case ;3 Please give me my lunchbox back once you’re done eating the cookies!♡

"...Your note makes me wanna barf."

So that’s why she didn’t try anything. That sneaky little... she must've slid that into the basket when they were packing. She already knew that Tiffany would eventually be forced to talk to her again... as if! Who says she’ll return it? She can just throw all the cookies away along with the box... Or so she thought. Tempted, she took a bite, then another one. And another one. Her diet was ruined for sure now. Damn you Claire and your stupidly great cooking skills, as if you needed another skill to be better and more perfect than you already are. Tiffany put the box away, trying to forget the delicious taste and smell. Back to Instaglam she goes. Uploading the picture while adding the "marigold" tag on it. Going through the pictures again, she noticed that some of them had Claire in the corner. She was thinking of deleting them but... well whatever. She can just crop her out later if needed. Her dress looks pretty so it’s fine even if she does appear in the pictures. All we see is a bit of her hair, as long as her face isn’t visible, it’s okay. Yup. It was totally not because Tiffany was slowly starting to feel something towards the girl she was trying so hard not to get involved with.

#sweet elite #claire durand #tiffany #cliffany #crackship #fanfics

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surveys-at-your-service · 3 years

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Survey #422

“i will not become a figure of my mistakes / i will not become the mask that is not my face”

Have you ever been told you were a good writer? I've been told that's one of my "gifts." What do you put on your baked potatoes? Butter, American cheese, and bacon bits. Gooood shit. What are you listening to? I'm re-watching Gab Smolders play Parasite Eve. Love that game to bits, and I really enjoy how she has a legitimate appreciation for it despite its age. It's so great watching her fall in love with a game she knew nothing about. Did you ever have braces? Yes. Are you afraid of flying? I acknowledge the risks of it, but I don't really actively fear it. Are you short? No; I'm your average height for an American woman of my age. Have you ever used a fire extinguisher? No. Would you want your future children to date someone like you as a teenager? I was a fine teenager, so sure. Are you unhappy at the moment? That's quite the understatement. When’s the last time you got in trouble with your parents? *shrug* How many children do you want? None. It's funny though, I had a dream last night that I gave birth to a daughter I of course named Alessandra. Have you ever watched Keeping Up With The Kardashians? No. Do you have any career ideas in mind? I have no desire to talk about this right now. Do you have any gay friends? Yeah. Are you gay yourself? I'm bi. Are you doing anything this weekend? Of course I'm not. But that's a surprise to nobody. How many brothers do you have? One. Do you like Mexican food? Only very few things. What’s your best friend’s pet’s name(s)? Oh man. Some are family pets more than hers, but regardless, there's Buster, Beasley, Winter, Martha, Crowley, Little Dot, Jane Marie, Doris, Raisha, and a bunch of other fish. Did you go to work today? I don’t have a job. .-. How old are you? How old do you act? 25. I think mentally I'm capable of acting older, but as far as "being an adult" goes, taking care of mature responsibilities, I'm a child. What size shoe do you wear? I... haven't worn anything but flipflops in so long that I barely know. I want to say an 8? 7 1/2 depending on the shoe? Are there any spiders in your room right now? I dunno. What was your favorite class during your sophomore year of high school? Art, for sure. Who’s your favorite Disney character? Probably Dory. Are there any framed pictures of you in your house? With my sisters, yes. Do you wear bandanas in your hair? No. Have you ever been on a blind date? No, not interested. Do you need to shave? My legs look like a gorilla's. My armpits, slightly. I shave them every time I shower, so I'll shave them soon. Are you wearing makeup right now? No. I never do nowadays. Do you know anyone named Laura? Not off the top of my head. Do you have any exercise equipment in your home? A few things. How many living grandparents do you still have? None. What are your plans for the rest of the day? Nothing, really. I hope I read today, though. I haven't the past couple days and I refuse to totally lose my habit of it again. How many times have you been sick this year? None. What colour is your toothbrush? White. Do you have a favourite author? No. How long do you usually take in the shower? Barely even 10 minutes. I do nooot understand how some people take so long. Clean yourself, get out. Like I get it if you're shaving or doing "extra" stuff besides washing your hair and body, but generally, how???? Have you ever worked in an office? No, but as I prepare to job search again, that's what I'm aiming for, I guess. It sounds like something I (including my legs, given I'd be sitting) could possibly handle. But yeah, you need experience in absolutely everything nowadays to get any job, it seems. Have you ever stayed in a hotel without your parents or older relatives? Yes. Have you ever kissed anyone under the mistletoe? I actually don't think I have. What’s your go-to activity when you’re bored? Watch YouTube. Who was the last person you texted? The lady who works in my psychiatrist's office to verify my next appointment date. Do you see yourself married in the next five years? Probably not, really. How long does it take you to get ready to go out? Barely over five minutes, or less, depending on what I have to do. Do you own any clothes you wouldn’t wear in front of your mother? No. Have you changed much this year? I haven't changed at all. And that's not a good thing. Is there a girl that you truly hate? A corner of my mind says yes. Even though I have no right to. Do you have any candles in your room? No, but I do have a wax warmer. Have you ever had to dial 911 before? A couple times for Mom. What’s something in your past that you’ll always remember? I'm almost certain even dementia couldn't take away my memory of the breakup. Did you have a good birthday this year? Yeah, it was good. How many people have told you they were in love with you? Two. Do you find smoking unattractive? Yes. How slowly or quickly would you say you eat? I eat way too fast, but I literally can't figure out how to change it. I try to slow down, but it just... doesn't stick. It's so engrained in me as a habit. Do you remember how you felt on 9/11? I was too young to remember this. What do you think of people who always wear make-up? You go for it, you look great. What’s a smell that absolutely makes you gag? Severely decaying roadkill is very high on the list. Is there a smell that gives you headaches? Gasoline. What about one that reminds you of the past? Play-Doh, for one. Childhood things like that. Also like those really fruity lip glosses, etc. What’s your least favorite thing about summer? The fucking heat and humidity. What’s your least favorite thing about the holiday season? The knowledge I don't have the money to buy like anyone presents. Especially my niece and nephew. Mom helps me buy something for them, but still... I feel like such a bad aunt that I can't do it myself. Other than yourself, who knows you the best? Whoever reads these, probably, ha ha. Do you have any embarrassing qualities and, if so, what are they? I'm just awkward in general. What’s one complaint that you have about school? Common Core. It's awful. What do you do while you’re on campus but not in class? I would just go to the library and do stuff on my laptop. Do you know anyone who has Autism/Asperger’s syndrome? Yes. It's questionable that I myself may have high-functioning autism. Has anyone of the same sex ever hit on you? Yeah. Are you open to a same-sex relationship and why or why not? Yes, because I'm bisexual. Have you ever dressed like or worn clothing belonging to the opposite sex? I would wear Jason's pj pants sometimes. Have you ever found yourself to be ugly? I've always believed I'm ugly. Have you read the Twilight series and do you like it or dislike it? I never read the series or watched the movies. Have you been on any type of online messengers today? I've used Discord to message Sara. What is your state’s minimum wage? $7.25 an hour. Disgusting. Do you own a tablet of any kind? No. If you eat eggs, how do you eat them? I only enjoy scrambled eggs or omelettes. When you’re upset, do you vent to people or do you keep to yourself? Nowadays, I tend to keep it to myself or vent through surveys. Have you ever watched a meteor shower? No, but I would love to. Do you like Slim Jims? OH MY GOD YESSSSSSSSSS. I want one now. What’s your opinion on the color turquoise? I think it's very pretty. Have you ever been in a castle? Only the Disney World one. When you were little, did you ever play with Play-Doh? Of course! I loved doing that. Would you rather write a mystery or love story? Hm... probably a love story. Are you afraid of getting shots? Kind of. I just hate the feeling of the medicine being injected, and long needles puncturing skin makes me want to squirm a bit. Needles in general though, I'm not afraid of. Would you ever run away and get married with no notifications to your family? Uh, no. I'm close with my immediate family and would want them to know. Have you ever wanted to vlog? Noooo. My life is so very boring, not to mention I would feel WAY too awkward. Who was the last person who unexpectedly texted you? No one unexpectedly texts me. Have you ever voluntarily read the Bible? Some of it. Have you ever thought that your life was so bad you wanted to give up? Many times. Do thunder & storms scare you? Actually, since I started having recurring tornado nightmares, I started to sort of fear them again. What are two foods you think only taste good with whipped cream? I hate whipped cream. If you eat it, what is your favorite way to eat beef? Cheeseburgers. Are you insecure about your height? What made you think this way? No. Did your last significant other have a huge temper? No. Would you ever think about doing porn? NOOOOOOOOO, even if I was in good shape. Would you ever cheat on someone if they cheated on you? No. That's not going to fix anything. Do you like getting jewelry or do you not wear any? I don't mind it, but I don't really wear it. When you were in high school did you ever have bomb threats? Once or twice. He was a... troubled kid. Did/Do you get school cancellations because of snow? Oh yes. My area flips shit if there's even a risk of like an inch of snow. Who knows ALL of your secrets? Nobody. Do you eat dinner with your family every night? No. Have you ever thought about what it would be like to have a baby right now? No, not really. That would be fucking awful. There's no way I'd be able to raise it. Have you used Limewire before? Back in the day. Are you/Were you in a band? If so, what was your band name? No. Have you ever tried cocaine or heroin? No thanks. Do you own any shirts with a peace symbol on it? No. I'd wear one, though. Have you ever dyed your hair light auburn? No. Ever had ice cream dots? Dippin' Dots? Yes. Do you have your national flag hanging up anywhere outside your house? No. Would you ever go to Japan? I'd like to. Have you ever been in a choir? When I was a kid in Catholic school, yes. What did you eat for breakfast today? Honey Nut Cheerios. When is the next time you’ll be up on stage? Preferably never.

#survey #surveys #random questions #lyrics: ''disguise'' by motionless in white

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buckysmischief · 4 years

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That’s What I Am

Bucky Barnes x reader

Summary: If this were a fairy tale you’d be the princess who was over protected and Bucky would be a knight in shining armor, not your parents first choice. But you are no princess, and Bucky isn’t a knight. He does have shiny armor though.

Word Count: 1.7k

Warnings: language, so much fluff at the end its gross

AN: that summary is very vague but I'm sleep deprived, just roll with it. This is also for @valkyriesryde 400 writing challenge! My prompt was the song Uptown Girl (I just like this version) and it’s been an idea I’ve had in my head for such a long time, I hope you enjoy!

Masterlist

☾

Today’s the day you and MJ had been planning for a month. To others a day spent in Brooklyn probably wasn’t a big deal, but it wasn’t often you left the Upper East Side. Your parents, the ones who save you and then adopted you at a young age, were very overprotective. Growing up you understood, but you’re an adult now, you wanted more freedom.

You never grew up resenting Tony and Pepper for their choices, because of them you had an above average upbringing. Even the idea of taking over Stark Industries one day was a dream. But even with all you had, you just couldn’t shake the feeling that you were missing something.

The sound of your phone ringing suddenly pulled you out of your thoughts. It was Harry Osborn, again. “Harry, please stop calling me every morning. Texting was invented for a reason. Please stop disrespecting its creator and learn to use it.”

Harry was your childhood friend, and your future husband if Tony could find a way to convince you. He wasn’t a bad guy, he just wasn’t the person you could see yourself spending the rest of your life with. There was nothing you didn’t know about him, you couldn’t even think of a time you were romantically attracted to the man.

“But then I’ll never hear your voice thing in the morning, even if it is full of attitude.” oh how you wish he was being sarcastic. “Anyways, do you have plans for today? I was hoping we could go see that new art exhibit-”

“I’m busy, Harry. MJ and I have had these plans for a month.” you interrupted, hoping he would take the hint and let you go. Thankfully, he did.

“Oh okay, maybe another time. Have fun today YN.”

While getting ready for the day you received a text from MJ, Peter and I will be there in 20. He found a really cool bar last night so we can check it out tonight if you want. You send a quick ‘sure’ and finish getting ready. It’s not too chilly now, but if you were going to be out late it would be smart to wear a flannel with your ripped jeans and Vans.

“I’m going out with MJ and Peter, love you both!” you yelled out to Tony and Pepper. Lucky for you, they were too busy trying to get Morgan ready to try and convince you to spend the day with them.

The three of you spent most of your morning getting from the Upper East Side to Brooklyn, occasionally stopping for coffee or to take selfies. Around noon Peter drags you and MJ into his favorite pizza place and start planning the day, but not before you answered a few questions for MJ.

“Before we start doing that, update us on the whole Harry situation.” Where do you start?

“Well, he called again this morning.”

“He knows you’re not a morning person, why does he set himself up?” oblivious Parker being fully aware?

Before you can bring it up in an attempt to change the subject, MJ asks, “What I mean is, why don’t you want to marry Harry? You’ve known him since we were kids, he helps run his dad’s business, he’s stable-”

“That’s exactly it. All of it. I want to meet someone new and actually learn things about them. Harry has everything handed to him, and yes he deserves most of it, but I am not going to be one of those things. Especially since it’s almost expected I spend the rest of my life with him. And, we’re not even dating!” this was a topic you had thought a lot about. Harry has been dropping hints, more like gifts, more and more that he wants to marry you. Why didn’t start with asking you out on a date is a mystery, but it wouldn’t have mattered.

After finishing his slice of pizza, Peter speaks up, “Sounds to me like we found our objective for the day.”

“What’s that?”

“Getting you a boyfriend. Or someone to get Harry off your ass at least.”

“Please no, I’m begging you both.” you give them both a look, they’ve been trying to do this for years and finally they’ll have the chance. You were terrified to say the least.

The rest of the day was, accidentally, spent at an arcade. It was filled wall to wall with different games from new to classic, but you only wanted to play one thing: Ms. Pac-Man. Thankfully it wasn’t the only one in the building, you played for hours until the couple told you it was time to head to the bar.

Once arriving, MJ and Peter go to the bar to get the first round while you look for a booth to sit at. You’re sitting in one you found close to the bar when a man walks up to you, the first thing you noticed were his eyes. Have you ever seen that color blue before? The next was his left arm. How does he have a vibranium arm? The Wakandans don’t just give vibranium to anyone.

“What’s a nice girl like you doin in a place like this?” the more he talked the more you questioned if MJ had sent him over. She knew your type and that accent was at the top of the list. Instead of blowing him off, you decided to have some fun.

“Looking for a downtown man, according to my friends. Any suggestions?”

He gives you an innocent smile, but the look in his eyes are anything but. “That’s what I am, doll.”

You can see MJ and Peter signaling to you from the bar that they’re going to stay there, of course. “Mmm, so what’s your story soldier?” He only give you a curious look.

“I can see your dog tags.” you gesture to his chest. “Do I get that story now? Or at least your name?”

“Bucky. You can call me Bucky.”

“YN.”

A few hours, and drinks, you’ve gotten to know each other better. You told him about you parents and eventually explained the whole Harry Osborn situation. How he couldn’t take a hint and spoiled you with unnecessary, and unwanted, gifts.

Bucky’s friends, Sam and Steve, eventually came over to introduce themselves. You quickly learned that they weren’t shy as they told you about their time in the army. Bucky lost an arm, Sam lost a good friend, and Steve almost lost himself.

“Hey, yn, ask Bucky about his metal arm.” Sam quipped.

“Woah, who has a metal arm?” Peter and MJ would chose that moment to walk in on the conversation, Peter immediately looks at Bucky, “That is awesome dude!”

You and MJ both give Peter a look, but Bucky seems to be unbothered and tells the group how he got him arm.

A group of Wakandans found him floating on a raft after the helicopter he was in exposed. They brought him to their princess, and tech expert, Shuri. She immediately began working on a vibranium arm to replace the one he had lost.

Everyone had lost track of time, surprised to hear the sound of last call at the bar. You were nervous to ask Bucky for his number, there was no way you were going to run into a guy like him and not do anything about it. As you were walking back to the booth, Bucky stood and walked you outside to talk in private.

“So, doll. I was wonderin, if it isn’t too soon, can I take you out on a date? I know I can’t buy you a bunch of fancy things, and your parents probably won’t approve of me, but I’d really like to try.”

He was standing there, looking a lot more nervous than you felt, while you took a second to go over what he just asked.

“I don’t care about gifts or tokens of love, I just want someone who actually cares enough to get to know me and then love me for who I am. As for my parents, they’ll see that you want to do exactly that. They’ll love you. Eventually.”

“Eventually? You don’t sound too convincing”

“Only one way to find out, soldier.” you say to him with a wink.

The next couple of months are spent getting to know Bucky better and introducing him to Tony and Pepper. You were right, they loved him.. eventually. It was during the first night he came over for dinner and he answered every question they could think to throw at him.

Harry, on the other hand, did not take the news well. He eventually stopped talking to you altogether, which hurt at first, but if he couldn’t put his feelings aside and be happy for you then it was his loss.

A year later, the two of you are moving into your own place and Bucky was planning to propose. He had a plan to make you a nice romantic dinner after the house was set up and ask you the big question at the end, but the man couldn’t wait. He needed to hear you say ’yes’ as soon as he could.

That night, the first night in your new home together, Bucky waiter until you crawled into bed beside him.

“Hey Yn.”

“Yeah?” you ask, trying to get comfortable.

He then gets off the bed, pulls something out of his nightstand, and gets down on one knee.

“I was going to ask you after a nice romantic dinner, but I couldn’t wait. Every moment with you is a new reason to live, a new reason to be the best man I can possibly be. I can’t give you everything that you deserve, but I promise to give you all I have. I love you, yn. Will you marry me?”

“Yes! Oh shit, really? Yes!” you sob, happier than you’ve ever been.

Bucky slides the ring onto your finger and gets back into bed. Realizing this was how you were going to spend the rest of your life, you smiled to yourself, knowing it couldn’t be spent with a better person.

☽

Permanent taglist: @sociallyeneptbarnes @valkyriesryde @buckysdumbmetalarm @rogvewitch @infj-slytherclaw @whimsicalatbest @readeity @nea90sweetie @aestheticrelated @pinknerdpanda @justabitoverobsessed @imsoft-barnes @actualdpshuri @goalexis123 @https-bucky @stuckyandsciencebros @moli1497 @agentpeggybarnesfanfics @justmebeingtheweirdmeiam @screaming-fridge @geeksareunique @rhymesmenagerie @brokenthelovely @ivoryhazlewood @sweetkingdomstarlight-blog @mushyjellybeans @sebbbystaaan @rayche776 @buggy-blogs @estillion14 @perpetually-tuned-out @stuckonjbbarnes

#vals400writingchallenge #Bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes imagine #reader insert #marvel #mcu fanfic

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elvendorkwanwan · 5 years

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Hit Music 2005

No one expected Gorillaz to be so popular and people probably has forgotten Blur. Damon Albarn doesn’t seem to care though, he puts Blur aside and takes Jamie Hewlett to China for two whole weeks which he calls it “collecting folk songs”. They’ve been to Hunan, Guizhou, and Zhejiang. Not only did they travel Chinese attractions and taste all kinds of local cuisines in every streets and alleys, but they also promoted their new album while they were traveling. What a smart way to kill two birds with one stone.

Damon

Hit: Do you always wear a big sunglasses to look cool? Damon: Oh, no, it’s the light here, my eyes are sensitive to the light.(He said, taking off his glasses. Wow, what a typical handsome European, he has charming blue eyes.) Hit: What is your main purpose in coming to China? Damon: I was invited by a friend, but also was attracted by Chinese culture. I am interested in the culture and lifestyle of Chinese ethnic minorities, and their music in particular. We are so fascinated by it. On the other hand, we are promoting the new album Demon Days in here. In the past two weeks, we’ve been to Guiyang, Phoenix City, Changsha and Yiwu. But we are leaving today. Hit: That’s a shame, four more days and it’s the traditional Chinese autumn festival. You can have some delicious mooncakes on that day.(Damon seems to be interested in food.) Damon: Oh, yes. We have had some amazing food here. I found Chinese food really worthy of its reputation. I also bought a book of how to make dumplings. Hit: What’s the inspiration of making Gorillaz? Do you have any plans on touring? Damon: Each song is a story, and mostly happened on a dark night.It’s similar to the darkness that fell upon people after the 9 / 11 incident. For touring, as I have a very good impression of China, I will talk about it with my friends. We’re planning a world tour. I promise you, there will be a Chinese date. We’ll be back. (How’s the new video going? Damon: We are sampling in Africa right now, we have three videos done, now there’s one left. ) Hit: How did you and Jamie meet? Damon: We have many mutual friends, we’ve been knowing each others for 15 years.(Is it true that you guys live in the same building? Damon: Yeah, but that was a year ago, now we are living across the street.) Hit: What makes you want to form a HIP-HOP virtual band in the first place? Damon: Well, I still want to write pop music, but I don’t want to make ordinary music which is boring. And I’m interested in the idea of replacing actual people with cartoon characters. In fact, we can not be simply defined as hip hop band, because our music is very diverse, we got inspirations from everything. Gorillaz combines elements of Rock, reggae, hip-hop and lo-fi together. Hit: Would you like to talk about Oasis? They released a new album this year and it’s doing well. You guys were fighting a lot back in the old days. Damon: Well the battle between Blur and Oasis was some kinda promotion of the Britpop, isn’t it? As for our music, we better leave it to other people to judge. Hit: I also heard that you slammed the Live 8 concert, why is that? Damon: Because I think the concert lost its purpose. Assisting Africa is a formidable and complicated thing, and there are different ways to approach that. I think the reason to hold Live 8 concert is to help more people to understand Africa’s culture and its current situation. But live 8 failed to do that. For example, I used to think that I know about China, but it wasn’t until I actually came here and really got to know what people’s lives were like in here that I had a deeper feeling for China, a feeling that was different from the past. For the past two weeks, I’ve been fascinated by what’s going on here. I think Live 8 is a failure. It’s like if half the people in China were starving right now, and we organized a concert to help them, but not one Chinese was involved in the whole project, would you call that a success? Hit: Ok, let’s talk about something that’s less heavy. What other hobbies do you have besides music? Damon: Cooking, jogging, and playing with my baby daughter. I really like to cook, especially Chinese food. I had so many delicious food in China! I also bought a bunch of cooking books and I am going to try all of them when I get back. Hit: Can you make dumplings yet? Damon: We’ve got it covered. (Damon laughs, and I remind him that he needs more practice.) Oh, all I have to do is slice up the flour, chop up the vegetables and meat, then put in some mushrooms. And don’t forget about the chilli. (Damon windmills his hands while speaking, as if to prove that he can really cook. “Yeah, he loves chili, ” Jamie adds.) Hit: What’d you like to say to so many Chinese fans? Damon：谢谢(Thank you)！（He says these two words fluently in a strong British accent, somebody’s been practising obviously.）

Jamie

Hit: Can you introduce yourself first? Jamie: Introduce myself? (Jamie looks at me blankly. “Start from ‘I am —’ Ready, go!” Damon quips.) I’m Jamie (He thought for a while before blurting out. “I’m single. I’m looking for a girlfriend. ” — I made fun of him as Damon did.) I’m happy to be in China. I am the artist of the band, so I drew all of these arts. Hit: How did you come up with the idea of using cartoon characters as the band’s public image? Jamie: Because cartoon characters are so common, everyone has seen cartoons, and their characters can be more edgy. They can do a lot of things that actual people can’t in real life, they are the exaggeration of reality. And it’s easier to show artist’s intentions with cartoons. Hit: I noticed that in your paintings, characters’ eyes are specially designed. Why is that? Jamie: Well, because when you talk to someone, you look them in the eye, and through their eyes you can see what they’re thinking. Hit: Who is your favourite Gorillaz member? Jamie: I think it’s Murdoc, who’s formed the band and also is the heart of the band. Hit: When you were creating Gorillaz, did you ever think about making the band members’ appearances match the music? Jamie: Not Exactly. You know, the band members have their own personalities and backgrounds. So it’s more like… making cartoons. (Did you make their personalities more similar to the actual band members?) No, they are nothing like the people behind all this . Hit: Did anything hilarious happen during this trip? Jamie: We have a lot of funny stories, but it’s hard to explain. We spent most of the two weeks bouncing on the bus. Hit: What kind of person Damon is in your eyes? Jamie: He’s a lovely sunny boy.

Bonus

1. After Damon Albarn said his “thank you” to fans, I asked if he knew any other Chinese words, he immediately turned to Jamie, who was standing next to him, and asked, “How to say dumplings? ” And then he smiled and said, “饺子! ” which sounded way more precise than the “thank you”. 2. Damon talked a lot about the places he had visited, and he solemnly pointed to the green military rubber shoes on his feet, “Look! I bought them in PHOENIX CITY! ” Jamie, who was wearing the same shoes as Damon’s, also pointed to his feet and said, “Mine too! ” 3. Damon is apparently good at doodling, so he improvised on the magazine we brought with us… I just felt a little twitch at the corner of my mouth, I don’t know how to appreciate thta! Awkward!

for @damonalbarn

#Damon Albarn #Jamie Hewlett #jamion #gorillaz #2005 #translated by me

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douchebagbrainwaves · 4 years

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STARTUPS AND POSTPONE

Http request away. One of many metaphors you could use to connect through any ISP, every technophobe in the country. Are there languages that force you to organize your thoughts. Partly, I think, at least working on problems of minor importance. Ten years ago investors were looking for the word click will catch 79. It's just as well? It was during the trough after the Internet Bubble, startups dried up too. If you get inspired by some project, it would seem the most natural thing in the world. Not ready for commitment This was my reason for not starting a startup just one year later, after hackers at MIT had spent a couple years. Over and over we see the same gap between Raymond Chandler and the average level of what they're writing, as you might expect, it winds all over the country fire up the Standard Graduation Speech, the theme of which is: don't give up on the bottom. One VC who read this essay wrote: We try to avoid meeting them, and this is one reason intranet software will continue to work for will be as bad as the mid-twenties the people worth impressing already judge you more by what you've done in the last 150 years we're still only able to formalize a small percentage of our page views, less than fifty percent. It always is in a startup instead?

1, which should be no more great new stuff beyond whatever's currently in the pipeline. Those worried about America's competitiveness often suggest spending more on public schools. But there may not have any more idea what the number should be than you do. Such influence can be so shockingly inefficient that it takes a startup to do this, be sure to make something customers want. Most people can seem confident when they're saying one plus one is two, because they treat this as evidence of laziness. They think that there is such a big problem. It has always mattered for women, but in different enough words that no one on the admissions committee knows the professors who taught rhetoric or composition? When you manipulate a program in your head is to realize that having an idea I didn't want them to believe it will be Demo Day, because Demo Day presentations are now so short that they rarely include much if any demo.

A year and a half of them are bad: 1. Representational art is only now recovering from the approval of both Hitler and Stalin. And unless you got lucky like Andy Bechtolsheim, one of the main ideas in that mix is that if you're going to take, and the crap they get in return. That's the closest I can get to one. In fact it's our explicit goal at Y Combinator often have the downtrodden air of refugees. Extreme choices like starting a new search engine, but lately when using Google search I've found myself nostalgic for the old days was a pretty nice guy, but at the same conference in 1998, or turning down a billion dollar acquisition offer. The problem with starting a startup frightened me so much is that they're easy to find, though. Don't spend much time worrying about the details. So if you want to invest in a startup. I mentioned, is a topic where there's no threshold of expertise to post comments about that. We learned quickly that the most important work being done was intellectual archaelogy.

Hard problems call for great efforts. Indeed, one quality all the founders to accept vesting for a sum this size, and others to sit quietly in the background when you hear someone say that in front of him, he didn't answer. They found it novel that if you wanted to go. David Sloo for reading drafts of this. One way to guess how far an idea extends is to ask yourself at what point you'd bet against it. So they decide to start drawing like grownups, and one of your most interesting philosophical problems. Today a lot of time on the software, listening closely to the ideal startup founders. They are all fundamentally subversive for this reason, though they may not reconverge once the economy gets better. VisiCalc in a weekend, or visiting a friend's startup down the street to the messy, tedious ideas, you'll be ahead of 95% of writers.

In middle school and high school kids don't. To change the interface both have to agree to change it easily, or at least postpone, turning into managers, just as we know it, doesn't happen. In a startup, it will stay. Everyone knows it's a mistake founders constantly make. But when you use this method, you'll get better at your job. Within YC when we say it's ipso facto right. And the big danger of getting addicted to fundraising is not merely valuable, but something major is missing. Line near Central, Harvard, or Davis Squares Kendall is too sterile; in Palo Alto you happen to run into a problem when you use this trick for dividing a large group into smaller ones, something strange happens that I've never heard of a case may be a fine place to live, and students want to stay in other people's places.

If there are any axioms that could be ignored. That's where you'll find a degree of skepticism helpful. The first approach is a mistake. In later stage startups the questions are about deals, or hiring, or organization. You don't see faces much happier than people winning gold medals. The last ingredient a popular language needs is time. A startup doing something technically difficult, just unfamiliar.

There are two routes to that destination. It seems to be a startup. 20 only because they haven't been around long enough. Instead of focusing on getting internships at companies they want to mislead you. If you want to raise a specific amount. Bulgaria, we could just code. Everything happens slower in big companies, because selling online was a natural extension of their existing deals, they'll find they're net ahead, because so many had been raised religious and then stopped believing, so had a vacant space in their heads, which either desperately tries to munge what I've said into something that conforms with their decision or just outright dismisses it and creates a rationalization for doing so, and were able to raise significant funding after Demo Day.

It's easier to make a lot of time and get nothing if it fails. I sat down to write them. Some say Europeans are less energetic, but I think it will be made quickly out of inadequate materials. I couldn't have done this. 9999 free! Lexical closures provide a way to make yourself a neutral vessel for the truth, as I mentioned, a pretty bad judge of startups. The first essay of his that I read was so electrifying that I remember exactly where I was at Yahoo, so he went to a better college. Despite their name, but delusion strikes a step later in the life of a program with a bunch of twenty year olds could get rich, or you have to like a new idea.

Thanks to Paul Buchheit, Josh Kopelman, Ross Boucher, and Fred Wilson for the lulz.

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trashboatprince · 5 years

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Got another one-shot for you guys! Super slow day at work (got sent home early), spent the time during those few hours working on an idea I’ve had in mind for a while...

Toon Bendy going to school with his mom!

Inspired by another wonderful one-shot by zanzaflux, School Days, probably my favorite of the Slice of Life series. Go check out these one-shots and the others by this author, they’re such great stories!

On with the fic!

“Okay, thank you for telling me. Yes, I’ll pick up the lesson plan from the front office when I get there. Alright, thank you, have a safe trip.” Linda replied before she hung up the phone.

“Who was that?” Henry asked as he worked at the stove, cooking dinner.

“It was Mrs. Margo, she needs someone to fill in for her on Monday, she’ll be out of town for something her husband is going to and she had to go with him.” Linda spoke as she moved back to the counter where she had been working on the salad for their spaghetti dinner.

Henry nodded as he worked on stirring the pasta. “Is it just the one day?”

“Monday, yes. She’ll met me know if I have to fill in for Tuesday.”

“What’s goin’ on on Monday?”

Linda and Henry looked over at the kitchen table, seeing Bendy getting himself up on his chair, looking interested in the conversation. He had only been a toon for a short time now, it was a little surprising to hear him speak so clearly now than just the grumbles and such from before.

“Well,” Linda began as she placed the salad bowl on the table, “I just got a call to substitute for the third grade class on Monday.”

If she didn’t know any better, Linda swore she saw stars in Bendy’s eyes. “Can I come with!?” He loudly asked, nearly bouncing out of his seat.

“Uh, I don’t know if that’s such a good idea, bud.” Henry frowned as he moved to drain the pasta. “I know you’re now back to your original design, but some people are still...”

Bendy pouted and slumped in his seat. “B-But Henry, I’m great wit’ kids! An’ I promise I’ll be on mah best behavior! I won’t cause any problems! I just wanna see what dis school nonsense is all about! All mah friends tell me about it. An’ besides, I know what you do for a livin’ since you work from home, but not Linda!”

Henry looked over at his wife, well... it really is up to her.

Linda sighed softly, smiling at Bendy. “Okay, but just this once. And if anyone asks about this, tell them to speak with me. Also, you better promise to be on your best behavior, young man.”

Bendy’s face lit up like the Fourth of July as he made an X over his chest. “Cross mah heart!”

Bendy was practically gonna fly out of his car seat as he sat next to Linda, the grin on his face could rival the one he has in his beast form.

She smiled a little at him as she parked in the faculty parking lot of the school and Bendy shot right out the door the moment she shut off the car. He had gotten himself ready for today, even packing his own school lunch, a notebook and pen, and his Bendy plush into the little book bag he had for trips. He even put on a sweater for this so he looked nice.

“Hey, where’s all da kids?” He asked, looking around.

“Cause it’s early, Bendy.” Linda replied as she took his hands, walking towards the front doors with him. “See, I have to come in early to get the lesson plan and to get things ready. The kids come to school in about thirty minutes or so, but you can help me get things set up.”

“Okay!” He nodded, walking into the building with her. His eyes were wide as he took in the art mural on the wall, welcoming guests to the school. There were portraits of people Bendy never heard of that seemed to be of some importance to the school’s history along a wall of a hall that let to a room.

There was a woman at a desk with big glasses and a bright pink dress that matched her nails. She looked at Bendy, her eyes looked really big in those glasses, and she blinked at him like an owl. “Mrs. Stein?” She asked, looking up at Linda.

“I’m here for Mrs. Margo’s lesson plans.” Linda smiled, still holding Bendy’s hand. “And this is my son, Mrs. Fillmore. He came with me today, don’t worry, I’ll keep an eye on him.

Mrs. Fillmore looked at Bendy before giving Linda folder. She continued to watch the two as they left the office. Bendy made a face, great, not even three minutes in and already people were gawking. Should have seen that coming.

It didn’t take them long to get to a classroom and Linda entered it, letting Bendy go in first as she turned on the lights. Bendy’s smile was back on his face as he looked at all the interesting things on the walls, the desk all had names on them on bright pieces of paper that were taped to the top, and that he could see a playground from the big windows along another wall.

Linda had him sit at a desk with no name on it while she wrote things on the board. He happily spoke with his mother figure about what he saw in a cartoon the other day when he noticed kids in the playground. Linda saw a blur go from the desk to the window and she blinked, seeing that Bendy was pressed against the glass. “Can I go out an’ play?”

“At recess you can, but class starts in a few minutes.” She replied, watching him pout, before he grinned, waving at a few kids who spotted him and were waving back.

Just as she said, within five minutes, Bendy heard a bell ring loudly and the students all came rushing into the school. He quickly went to the open desk and waited patiently. The door opened and students entered, many of them quickly flocking to Bendy.

“Bendy!” A boy happily announced, giving him a tight hug.

“Hiya, Norman!” Bendy replied. “Guess what! Linda let me come to school wit’ her today!”

“That’s so cool!” Another kid spoke up. “Do ya get to stay with us all day then?”

“Yep! But only if I’m on mah best behavior cause then Henry’s gotta come get me.”

The kids happily chatted with him until Linda got their attention, telling them to take their seats. Bendy grinned as he saw that he sat next to his friend Norman from their neighborhood, giving him a thumbs up. This class had a lot of kids he recognized from the neighborhood and the parks he got to go to! A few faces were new, but the kids didn’t seem scared. In fact, they looked happy and in awe of him.

“Alright, student. I’m Mrs. Stein,” Linda started, “and your teacher wants you to continue what you were doing on Friday. So, let’s start off today with where you left off in your history lesson, take out your books and we’ll get back to that.”

Bendy watched the kids open the desks and pull out books. He looked into his own, not seeing anything but a chewed up pencil. He pouted, until Norman started pushing his desk over, letting the two share his book.

School was a lot more fun than Bendy ever could have imagined. TV made it seem bothering, and some of his friends complained, but Bendy was loving this! First they learned some history about America in the early 1800s, then they did math. Bendy did find that one a little boring, but he did learn a few things!

After math was science! Bendy LOVED this one because the kids showed him the bean plants they were growing and going to see if they could keep growing until the end of the school year. They even let him use an extra bean and planter they had, writing his name on it. Bendy also drew his face on it, which prompted a few other kids to do the same.

After those classes was lunch. Bendy was quite the popular toon at lunch, lots of children came up to him and asked him questions as he ate his sandwich. He was happy to answer questions, like where he came from and how he was alive. He kept the details vague, but he summed it up as ‘ink, a film reel, and a dream!’.

Then came recess, clearly Bendy’s favorite moment of the school day. He was all over the playground, playing with a whole bunch of his friends and new ones he made at lunch! He had seen Linda speak with a few teachers during lunch and recess about him, but no one had called anyone about him, or seemed alarmed. Phew!

Once those were done, it was back to class. English was kind of fun, Bendy got to work on his reading with his ‘classmates’, even though he made it probably more entertaining than what was required for reading out loud.

How was he suppose to know he wasn’t suppose to act like that when reading the Prince and Pauper? He’s a poor entertainer, he has to shine! Luckily, Linda let him do it, and the rest of the class tried to do dramatic readings like his as well, but it was hard when everyone was laughing.

The last class of the day seemed to be a free class. Norman explained that the last class was always different for each day. For Mondays, it was art. Since there was nothing in the lesson plan that was planned for this course, Linda let them draw whatever they wanted.

“Whatcha gonna draw, Bendy?” Lily, the girl who had been sitting in front of him, asked.

“Hmm... I dunno! Sweet potato pie, there’s so many things I could draw!” Bendy shrugged.

“Draw a dragon!” Hugo grinned from his seat. “I’m drawin’ one, you can do one too!”

Harrison, the boy next to him, shook his head. “Don’t force him, I’m sure he’ll figure something out.”

“You’d think it would be easy for a cartoon to know what to draw.” Molly laughed.

“I know!” Bendy blinked, before chuckling. “I’ve got an idea! I’m gonna draw somethin’ for Linda an’ Henry.” He whispered this to the small group around him.

“That sounds cute.” Lily smiled. “What for?”

“I dunno, I guess for lettin’ me do this. I’ve had a heck of a swell day! It’s da least I can do!” Bendy grinned as he picked up his pen and got to work on the sheet of paper that had been passed out.

He had finished his drawing by the time that class was over and stuck around for a few minutes, chatting with his friends about how he’d see them when he got him. The kids departed and Bendy was left with Linda, who finished with cleaning up things around the teacher’s desk.

After they dropped off the lesson plan at the front off, Bendy happily walked with Linda to the car. He told her about what he did at lunch and recess and how he couldn’t wait to tell Henry about his day. When they got him, Bendy bolted inside of the house, loudly yelling Henry’s name in excitement.

Linda chuckled softly to herself before she noticed that Bendy had left his school bag, seeing that it was open. She saw the draw he had done for class and took it out, smiled at the art.

It was of her and Henry, in Bendy’s art style, with the little toon in the middle. In his handwriting, he had written ‘thank you, mom & dad’ at the top of the drawing.

She smiled more as she got out, going to put this on the fridge for Henry to see and for her to tease the little devil about when he saw what she had did with his thank you art.

Cheesy, cute, but I really like the idea of Bendy in school. (and if it was up to him, he’d be a student)

Also, I made a reference to an oc friend of Bendy’s from one of my own fanfics, and a few au name references in this too. :D

#bendy and the ink machine #batim #batim bendy #linda stein #henry x linda #henry stein #john's drabbles

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cutiecrates · 5 years

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Cutie Reviews: DokiDoki May 19

I was kind of disappointed in how my review for the TokyoTreat went yesterday, I mean, even though it annoyed me through various means I wouldn’t not recommend the box still.

Meanwhile, I was very excited for this one. I’ve realized that after doing two really big box reviews, I come to really appreciate the much smaller ones, DokiDoki and YumeTwins. In turn I feel like that makes me do a little better... maybe.

This months theme: Sweet Dreams

“Drift off into dreamland with May’s crate. This month’s theme, Sweet Dreams is all about getting you ready to settle down and get cozy for a good night’s rest. Oyasuminisai is the common saying in Japan to wish someone a good night, so this month Doki Doki Crate is wishing you sweet dreams and a good night!“

This month, the booklet features a fun illustration featuring Tomomi with the girl mascots of Japan Crate and KiraKira Crate having a slumber party. I love how they have cute crossovers between their brands like this x3 it’s a fun touch- did you know Tomomi’s boyfriend is the mascot from Umai Crate?

I also like how even though they quit making the comics, they’re still making original art now and then.

Suteki Crate

This month the Suteki Crate (special crate all subscribers have a chance to win, in case you’re new here) focused on the theme and stuck to the characters featured in this box. It makes me want to nap just looking at everything~

(and I just woke up like an hour ago...)

But I will point out that they have offered a Kirby Otamatone before. Probably a year back or so, I remember seeing it. Also, the adorable Sleepy My Melody plush goes great with the photo contest prize, a sleepy Kuromi plush~

My Melody Mesh Case

Our first item would come in handy when staying out of the house for the day, it’s a mesh pack/bag/case, which can hold many toiletries; hair brushes and accessories, toothbrush and toothpaste, shampoo, soap, etc. It features an adorable pale pink zipper to match the adorable patterned band around the bottom, which is covered in My Melody with some small forest friends doing various activities (and lots of adorable English phrases).

Rating: ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

You know, I wasn’t ever into mesh containers like this, I always thought they looked kind of gaudy and they just didn’t appeal to me; but now that I’m older and I’m actually looking at one, it isn’t that bad. This would have come in handy when I was younger, I used to visit my grandma and spend the night/weekend a lot and my suitcase was always a pain dealing with. This could have lightened the load a little, or at least organized it better.

Also, it’s pretty big, I was able to fit in a lot of items and it didn’t feel too heavy or bad carrying. I did notice something though, the inside of the bottom section is sort of... thin cloth-ish, that kind of has me concerned that it might not be a good idea to get it wet, compared to the outside, which feels like it could handle that. Oh, I also noticed two holes in the mesh from the tag being cut, but I feel like it doesn’t really hinder anything.

San-X Towel

Also for bathroom/washing preparedness prior to bed or in the morning, we have a cute mini-towel featuring Sumikko Gurashi or Rilakkuma. As you can see, the Sumikko Gurashi group are out enjoying what looks like an autumn excursion :3 perfect timing considering it’s going on that season now.

And yes, it’s on one of my cats. He wouldn’t leave me alone while I was trying to get pictures, so I tried making him comfortable enough to go back to sleep.

Rating: ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

Well, besides being cute, I’m always impressed when we get towels like this because I don’t usually seen any around here. We have slightly bigger hand towels/rags, but nothing like this. It feels soft and nice, so I feel like this would be ideal for washing your face, drying off the hair, wrapping around the shoulders, using as a hand towel; it’s also the perfect size for wrapping up adorable pets~

(also, I noticed that when held up to the light you can see noticeable tag holes again. Not a huge deal though.)

Pajya Shark Plushie

Of course when you go to bed, you need a cuddly companion by your side to ensure sweet dreams or to help chase away the bad nightmares~

This month, we have an adorably colorful, pastel shark. The name Pajya is inspired by the fact that this was made with common Japanese Sleepwear in mind, which is usually in various soft tones and made from fluffy, soft material.

Rating: ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

I love fluffy-soft things~ and I also happen to have a fondness for sharks; it’s a weird combination when you think about it, but I love it! He is very soft and sweet looking, and he isn’t threatening or have any teeth, so he’s a good buddy for all types and ages x3 I admit, the sewing could be a little better, but it’s not bad.

(This box has made me super-sleepy~ As of now I’ve only been up an hour and a half >3< But it’s probably because I stayed up until 4am, and I’ve been hungry and didn’t eat yet...)

Kirby Eye Mask

As we prepare for bed, our next item is an adorable eye mask :D featuring Kirby or Waddle Dee. I have a few eye masks and I enjoy using them sometimes (they especially come in handy if you have a headache or just need to relax, unless they squeeze your head too much...) but I don’t use them too frequently.

The mask has a sleek feel and is thin and made from shiny material. It has a really stretchy light pink strap, and the inner-side is cloth, featuring a dark blue star pattern. It also has a small black nose flap...? I’m not entirely sure how that works or what its for, none of my others have one, but I assume it’s just for a little additional comfort or to help support the mask.

Rating: ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

It’s very cute, and I love the concept of bringing in Kirby for this sort of theme. In preparation for the review I was very excited to use this, and it feels very comfortable. Sometimes when I use eye masks I end up pulling them off after a while because they’re kind of uncomfortable or start squeezing, and I admit that this one felt like that after a while- but at the same time it wasn’t nearly to the same extent and didn’t bother me as much. The thin material makes it feel sort of breathable as well, which is nice when my poor nose is stuffed up and I can hardly breath as it is.

I can’t help but relax when I wear an eye mask, so I can’t imagine a more suitable item for this theme~

Kirby Night Light

Our last item is an adorable partner to the Kirby eye mask; a light! Again, this is another great and perfect bed item, especially if you’re someone you might feel a anxious in the dark or need a back-up light. It would also just be cute for a little desk light or something.

This requires 3 AA batteries (not included) and it is available in 2 styles; this parasol blue one I got, and a pink one covered in black and white old style manga or pop art Kirby. We all know how much I love pink, but I also really like the rain, and have a lot of fun playing with the parasol ability/item in Kirby games, so I think I’m actually really happy I got this one.

And of course I wouldn’t leave you guys hanging. I did get it working:

Rating: ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

The light is warm yellow (you know, the lights that seem kind of dim when you compare them to white lights? and yes I know it looks white in the pic, I had to brighten the image to make it see-able clearly) but still very bright; it ended up surprising me. I found it to be really soothing~

I also like the practicality behind this, if you didn’t want to use it as a night light you could use it as a backup flashlight (cause if you’re like us you have a bunch and they either die and you don’t replace batteries, or you lose them), or just to help create a mood- like telling spooky stories during a slumber party.

♥ Cutie Ranking ♥

Content - 5 out of 5. I have no complaints, I love these items :3 They’re very sweet and cute, and seeing them (and doing this review) makes me want to lay down to snuggle up with some of them~

Theme: 5 out of 5. I’m really happy to finally have a theme like this, I wish we’d get more bedtime items or themes. I feel like this is also suitable for all times of the year, and everything definitely went together to create a near-seamless box. I say near because some could argue well the bathroom items don’t count: but many people have a routine prior to bed, and some enjoy taking bathes before bed, so in a way yeah, they do count. Suteki Crate and the prize were also spot-on.

Total Rank: 10 out of 10 Cuties. I know to some people they might argue that a bedtime theme isn’t very exciting but everyone could use a little unwinding, especially at bed. I wasn’t feeling tired when I began writing this but I’m probably going to go back to bed when I finish. I didn’t have anything going on today and I fully plan to take advantage of that. As much as I liked our prior box, I love this one even more! Keep it up Doki Doki~

♥ Cutie Scale ♥

1. Kirby Nightlight - I love how it resembles an actual lamp x3 and I adore the pattern/print on both of the options. The glow made me feel relaxed- the only way it could be better would be if it had an actual rain effect or color change feature like my oil mister~

2. Pajya Shark - It’s colorful and sweet, it’s perfect for bed or just in a sugary sweet pastel setting. Very soft and cuddly.

3. Kirby Eye Mask - I kind of find face-themed eye masks to be kind of corny, but when it comes to Kirby it’s very cute! It felt really nice against the skin and I can’t wait to use it again (probably after this review).

4. Towel - It’s very cute, I can’t say the color scheme does all that much for me but I love how it’s fall/autumn themed and goes with the upcoming season. The cats really like it too.

5. My Melody Mesh Case - I think it’s sweet and soft on the eyes, but I know I won’t get much use out of it. I could use it now to do some organization of my items in the bathroom (or some others, which I’ll probably do) though, so it’s really practical.

#dokidokicrate #kirby merchandise #sumikko gurashi #my melody

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lobsters-on-their-heads · 5 years

Text

Continuing Travels of Cophine, Part 3 Chapt. 10

Fucking finally. I’ve been trying to get my novel out to literary agents, which has taken up a lot of creative energy on top of regular life activities and things (bipolar doesn’t always work in my favor, either). But, here it is!

You can read all of Part 3 here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16820221

Cosima didn't know how to write a condolence card. She sucked even more at picking one out, but on Tuesday that was her One Job.

At the card-and-party-goods store Sarah brought her to, the card section stretched over three full aisles, and the “sympathy” cards were ten percent of that. “Just grab a card,” she muttered to herself, “any fucking card.” But all of the cards she picked up sucked. Donnie Hendrix just lost his mother – the first person in his entire life who loved him – and the trite pre-written message on a two dollar piece of card stock was supposed to sooth his pain? Were the swoopy cursive letters and watercolor flowers actually supposed to comfort anyone? Or wasn't it all just a ploy to make those who hadn't lost anyone feel better about themselves? Like saying “look, I helped” without actually helping anything at all?

She picked up a card showing a tire swing at sunset. Always remember that every part of life is a part of God's plan, it said.

Cosima huffed. “Is cloning a part of God's plan, too?” she asked the card, and stuffed it back into it's slot.

Another read, Nothing happens without a reason. A whole bunch of Cosima's life experience contradicted that one, too.

Those who love us never really leave us.

“Way to rip off Sirius Black, yo,” Cosima told that card. As she suspected, JK Rowling was not credited with the message anywhere on the back.

She had no idea how close Donnie was (had been) to his mother. If (when) Cosima's mother died, there wasn't a card in existence that would even dent Cosima's pain. To make matters worse, in her search Cosima came across sympathy cards for the loss of a spouse or partner and she nearly fled the card aisle to join Sarah in the “summer fun” aisle with the pool noodles and plastic sand buckets. The two news alerts from Syria she got a few minutes ago really didn't help, and Delphine wasn't even in Syria yet.

Cosima was scowling at a card reading Don't cry. They're in a better place now when her phone rang. She crammed the card back in it's overcrowded slot and answered. “Hey gorgeous,” she said.

“Hey,” Delphine said. “Is everything alright? You said you needed some help?”

Delphine sounded exhausted, and Cosima chided herself. Delphine had treated two Turkish clones in two cities in two days. She deserved some time to herself. “Totally alright,” Cosima assured her. “Nothing to worry about. Forget I asked.”

“Euh, not very likely. What do you need help with?”

“Well, you seem like a classy lady, and so I thought – ”

Delphine's snorted laugh cut her off. “I'm sorry, what?”

“I have to buy a sympathy card for Donnie, and I have no frikkin' clue what to get, or, like, what to do when we see him later today.”

“Oh.” Delphine's mirth vanished. “Why are you buying a sympathy card? What happened?”

“His mom died. She had a stroke on Friday and she never woke up from the coma. Not, if you ask me, the worst way to go, but still sad, you know?” Funny how none of the sympathy cards said that: It wasn't the worst way to go, but it's still sad, I know.

“Hm.”

“Anyway, I'm trying to find the right card, and nothing seems right. Sarah doesn't know either, and the whole “sorry your mom died” thing kind of sent her to a bad emotional place too. Totally understandable, you know? She's distracting herself right now. I'd normally ask Alison, but obviously that doesn't work here. Scott's socially inept in these areas, even worse than me, and my mom's off the grid until June, so I can't ask her either.”

“I see.” Traffic rushed by on Delphine's end, and she said, “hang on,” a couple of times before the traffic noise ceased. “I'm not sure how much I can help, actually. I'm not exactly an expert in comforting phrases or what to say after someone dies. In English or in French, actually.”

Cosima sighed. “Well, you've gotta be better at this than I am. Like, what kind of card would you want if your mom died?”

Delphine laughed again. “That depends.”

“On what?”

“How she died, if she'd decided to talk to me before she passed, if she has a will...”

“Let's say there's no will, you were on speaking terms, and she died of a stroke.” Cosima had no idea about the will part, but assumed it didn't matter here. “In fact, you know what, scratch that. You'd probably want a card saying something like Guess what? She's dead.”

“In my case, yes, that would be fine. But this is not my case.”

“What kind would you want if I died?”

Delphine inhaled sharply, and Cosima kicked herself again. Delphine already had those nightmares. “I'd rather not think about that.”

“Yeah, fair. Ditto.”

“Cosima. What kind of card do you think you should get? What would the right one say in this situation?”

“I just want one that says, This sucks, and we all know it sucks, and we're here for you. None of this greater purpose, heaven and God shit. I mean, I know the Hendrixes go to church and all that, but... I don't know. It seems off base to me, and it'll be super obvious I don't mean it.”

“Don't they have any blank cards? You can write in your own message if you want.”

“I am not sure that would be better, actually.” She sighed again and held a hand to her forehead. Chances were, this would be their only conversation that day – it was dinner time in Bursa, and Cosima would be spending the next few hours with the Hendrixes. She should get the most out of her daily Delphine Time. Walking away from the cards towards the big store-front window, she asked, “How'd your day go, then? How was the treatment?”

“Fine. She's asymptomatic, as we suspected.”

Cosima smiled. “Nice of you to use the plural there. If I remember correctly, you're the one who convinced me not to drop clone fest to inoculate her back in March.”

“You weren't terribly opposed, though.”

“Mostly because I knew Alison would kick my ass.” Cosima giggled. “If only we'd known how Clone Fest would actually go! Alison might've been happy for us to miss it.”

“I thought you two smoothed all that over?”

“Eh. I guess. Forgiven but not forgotten, for my part.”

“Doesn't sound like you've completely forgiven, either.”

“I've forgiven enough to not bring it up again with her. How's that? I'm letting it slide.”

“As long as you're both okay.”

“I am fine. Alison's husband is the one I should be worried about right now. And you. I'm always worried about you.”

“Don't worry too much. Bursa is very nice. Rainy, but nice.”

“Oh, I'm sure it's nice. And it's not really Bursa I'm worried about, either.”

Delphine made a noncommittal noise. Cosima picked up a little animatronic Easter bunny from the store's clearance bin and pushed the button on its ear. While it danced around to its tinny robotic song, Cosima tried to think of something else to say – something other than “you know there have been chemical attacks in Syria recently” and “you know our security team can't really protect you from everything.”

“How's everyone else?” Delphine asked.

“Fine. Charlotte's still being Charlotte. Sarah's worried she's gonna fail her math class, so we're all trying to help her out with that.”

“Wait. Sarah's worried that Charlotte will fail? I thought she was strong in math.”

“No no no. Sarah's worried that Sarah might fail math.”

“Ah!”

“Too many shes, I know.”

“Hm.”

Cosima looked around to make sure Sarah wasn't in hearing distance. “I'm trying to kind of gently coax her into, like, an advisor's office or something. Maybe an academic counselor.”

“Sarah, you mean?”

“Yes, still Sarah. Like, it's weird.” Cosima looked around again. Sarah had moved on to the “Over the Hill” birthday aisle, where she was laughing at some tombstone shaped decorations. “She's obviously smart,” Cosima whispered to Delphine, “and she's doing everything she's supposed to do. She's working her ass off for these classes, and she just can't get it. Me and Scott are still tutoring her like once a week or so, but I dunno. I think she needs something that we're not able to give her, but I don't know what. She just keeps saying she's too stupid to get it, but I don't think that's the case.”

“No, I don't think so either.”

“She was joking the other day that someone must've dropped her on her head as a baby.”

Delphine was silent on the other end, but in the silence Cosima heard her thinking. The gentle tap of a pen or pencil gave it away. Before either of them to continue the conversation, Sarah came over and waved a “old man survival kit” at Cosima.

“Art's birthday's all set, then,” Sarah said. When Cosima just stared, she clarified. “He's turning 40 in a couple weeks.”

“Oh,” Cosima said. “Cool. Um. Send us the date, yeah?”

“Sure. He doesn't want anyone to know, but whatever.” She waved at the phone in Cosima's hand and raised her voice. “Hi Delphine!”

Delphine chuckled softly and said, “Hello Sarah” in a voice soft enough for Sarah to miss it.

“I should get going,” Cosima said into the phone. “I probably can't talk much later, but text me if you want, yeah?”

Delphine agreed to, they both said “I love you,” and Cosima hung up. Then she turned to Sarah. “How'd you know I was talking to Delphine?”

“Your face, mostly. Anyway, you ready yet? Where's the card? I wanna get outta here before I buy too much shit I don't need.”

* * * * * *

On Thursday, as Delphine travelled to Izmir, Cosima sat in their apartment and scrolled through job listings. The exercise was futile – she wouldn't apply to any of them and anyway, she didn't have her PhD yet. Her advisor sent back a list of dissertation edits yesterday, but Cosima had only made two of the smallest ones. More and more, every time she sat at the computer, her mind drifted. Some of it was the same old shit: anxiety over the state of the world and the nagging feeling that nothing she did amounted to much. And worry about Delphine. She always worried about Delphine. The job search began as a combination of those – worry that she'd never get a job good enough to give Delphine the kind of life she deserved.

Her family made sure to get her away from the Rabbit Hole for at least an hour every day now, and Cosima was not allowed to protest. If she did, they pretended to move in with her, loudly, until she left the apartment in frustration. That only happened once, though. Tuesday's outing was to the store and the Hendrixes, where Clone Club gathered to support Donnie in his grief. Yesterday, Cosima was back at Bailey Downs, to “help Helena with the boys” while the Hendrixes attended the funeral in Hamilton. “Helping with the boys” made no sense, of course, since Cosima didn't know what the fuck to do with one-year-olds except make silly faces once in a while, and Helena resented the obvious supervision. Cosima spent half of that visit riding Alison's bicycle aimlessly through the subdivision by herself.

Thoughts of the twins and the suburban expanse of Scarborough set Cosima's mind spinning again.

She remembered the sprawling, packed metropolises of Mexico City, Istanbul, and São Paulo. Those weren't even the biggest cities in the world, and still their size and scope took her breath away. She remembered the bustling streets of Lima and Cairo, and she'd never stopped being amazed at how many distinct individuals existed in the world. Little Arthur and Little Donnie were unique, just like every single one of those people. Just like Delphine. Just like Cosima and each of her sisters.

She shook her head and tapped her own cheeks. Another cup of tea was in order, but before she got up her phone emitted a weak little chirp – another news alert from Syria.

“Fuck it,” Cosima told her laptop. Grabbing her coat and purse, she went outside, leaving the job search and dissertation edits behind.

The Syrian news alerts never made Cosima feel better. Even the occasional cease fires failed to get her hopes up, because most of them devolved into violence again, or yet another armed group entered the scene to fuck shit up again.

At least Cosima now checked those alerts only from outside of the Rabbit Hole, with a view of sky and trees rather than drab walls and a moldy ceiling she lacked motivation to clean herself. Ignoring the chirps from inside the apartment didn't change the situation, but it helped Cosima keep her head screwed on, and it kept her from telling Delphine to just stay far the fuck away and send someone else to cure the Syrian Leda.

Not that she hadn't thought about it. The trouble was that no one else would do it – not the way it needed to be done, or with the appropriate discretion.

Cosima ordered a chai latte at the cafe around the corner, sat near the window, and gave in to her brain's desire to dwell on bad news for the day.

Fighting in Aleppo schools bombed in Hama clinics shot up in Ghouta ISIS kidnapping people in Deir ez-Zor

Hundreds of thousands of people were trying to flee with the clothes on their backs, and the only people trying to get in were ISIS recruits, aid workers, and foreign military “advisors.” By the time this whole shit show ended, Cosima doubted there would be anything left of the beautiful country she'd wanted to visit as a teenager – encouraged by her tenth grade math teacher who just happened to be Syrian and also super fucking hot. But that was now beside the point. The point now was that a different super fucking hot object of Cosima's affections would be in Syria within the next couple of weeks. Their purchase earlier that year of “kidnap and ransom” insurance only made Cosima feel worse.

Skimming over the most recent alert from Damascus, a pair of chimes interrupted her. The first was from Qamar, their remaining Arabic translator, requesting a phone call in a few minutes. She did that often, preferring to relay messages longer than five words verbally rather than in writing. Cosima sighed and agreed.

The other was the semi-daily update from Nabil back in Djibouti. Like most of the children's texts, it was short and random – a picture of a filthy street cat in the shadow of a trash can that he'd captioned “friienb.” Cosima replied as she usually did, with a picture of her own – her chai latte, framed by a glass sugar shaker and a napkin holder. She added a short and simple message of her own. “Lunch.”

She kept thinking of talking with Qamar about Nooran's nieces and nephews. Djibouti was certainly safer than Yemen, and now that Nooran was cured their life could improve somewhat, but Cosima couldn't let go of Nooran's request – to take the children to Canada with them. She also couldn't forget the role they'd inadvertently played in Cosima's current situation by sending a picture of themselves with the flag of the Muslim Brotherhood in the background. It wasn't their fault, and she would never – could never – ask them about it.

Her phone rang and she answered before even checking the caller. “Hello, this is Cosima,” she said.

“Hi, Cosima,” her mother said, a certain heaviness in her voice.

The dissonance between her expectation of Qamar's chipper accent and the sound of her mother's voice made Cosima reel. “Oh. Hey, Mom. I thought you were out to sea right now?”

“Well, we were.”

“Okay. That doesn't sound good. What happened? You said the boat was having some issues, but – ”

“No, honey, the boat's fine. We got that fixed last month.”

“Okay...”

A garbled, wonky announcement sounded through the phone, like the announcements at airports or train stations, but filtered under water. Sally sighed and waited for it to finish before speaking again. “We're at the hospital right now.”

Cosima froze. “Oh shit. Is it your foot?” She'd been worried about that, about her mother going out to sea so soon after bunion surgery, but Sally said no.

“No, honey, my foot's doing fine. It's Gene.”

“Oh. Is he...”

“It's not his heart this time. He's very keen on everyone knowing that. He did not have another heart attack, and he's been taking his statins regularly.”

“Okay, well that still doesn't really tell me what's wrong with him.”

Sally sighed again. “Well, a couple of days ago, he started noticing blood in his urine. Of course, being Gene, he didn't say anything about it until yesterday, when he couldn't urinate at all.”

Imagining that made Cosima squirm and cross her legs in sympathy. “That sounds awful.”

Beeping in Cosima's ear told her Qamar was trying to get through. Whatever. Qamar could wait. Qamar probably didn't have a urinary blockage.

Sally went on. “Yes, well, after several hours of that, he agreed we should turn around and head for shore. Fortunately we were only about six hours out from Eureka, so here we are.”

“So, what, Dad went like eight hours without peeing? Holy shit.”

“Closer to twelve or fourteen, I think. He's on a catheter now and they're running some tests.”

“Jesus Christ, poor guy.”

“Yes, well.” Sally gave a few of her deep sighs – the kind that came from somewhere beneath her diaphragm and that Cosima was all too familiar with.

“Go ahead and say it, Mom.”

She sighed again. “Well, it's just – I know this has been going on longer than he says it has. The doctors were worried about his prostate last year, and sometimes Gene gets this pinched look on his face, you know? This pinched pained look and then he acts like it didn't happen and he's not in any pain, like I'm some kind of an idiot.”

“That... sounds familiar.”

“Oh, so you noticed while we were in Toronto a few months ago? You noticed it too?”

“Uh, no, actually, I didn't. I was thinking of something else.” She was thinking of Delphine, wincing over the phone and over Skype and swearing that nothing was wrong, all the while having a cracked knee cap. “I think you and I have similar tastes in partners,” she told Sally.

Sally laughed. “Don't say that! Delphine's a nice girl.”

“Yeah, nice and stubborn as hell. Anyway. What's next? What's going to happen?”

“We're staying on land for a while. I knew Gene was really hurting when I told him we'd have to, and he didn't even argue.”

Cosima whistled. “Back to Berkeley then?”

“We'll see. I'll keep you posted. Love you.”

Cosima returned the sentiment and hung up. She needed to call Qamar and see what she'd turned up, but that could wait another few minutes. Pulling up her on-going text string with Delphine, Cosima typed, Would you tell me if you couldn't pee for twelve hours? After hitting send, she kicked herself. Over text, she wouldn't see Delphine's face when she read the question, and in regular messenger it was impossible to delete texts.

The phone call with Qamar lasted four minutes. Samira, the one Leda remaining in Syria, still resided in Douma, but had no cell phone or internet access. All the information Qamar had was word-of-mouth, from the cousin of a friend of Samira's husband.

“I tell him, you see her next month,” Qamar said

“It'll be a lot closer than that,” Cosima said. “Delphine's scheduled to meet the security team there on May 9.”

“May 9? Okay, I tell them tomorrow. I talk them tomorrow.”

“I mean,” Cosima cautioned, “there's also always the chance the date could change. Just like the others.”

“Yes yes. I know.” Qamar had been with them since they got the Leda List, or close to it. She knew the deal, even if she never quite understood it.

Off the phone again, Cosima let out a long, slow breath. Different news would have been welcome – that Samira had fled along with her Syrian Leda sisters and Delphine didn't need to go there at all, ever. Or maybe that Samira was in some unique position to hop over the border into Lebanon for a day or two and get treated there.

Not likely.

Finishing her drink, Cosima debated a trip to the aquarium or to see Scott at the university, where he was working on nanotechnology. She'd just settled on visiting Scott when Delphine's reply arrived. Yes, I will tell you if I can't pee for 12 hours but only on one condition.

That was unexpected. What's that?

You have to tell me why the fuck you tried putting a robot worm in your face a few years ago.

#continuing travels of cophine #my fanfiction #cophine fanfiction

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cryptidsandcatacombs · 5 years

Text

Coffee Date

Summary: Tagora and Oz are out enjoying a small coffee shop on Alternia. Oz has a few mental issues to sort out and Tagora is being a sneaky ferret.

A/N: Take my s/i and what they are as part of a Homestuck/Hiveswap AU where I change the canon facts a little. I am aware of canonical facts concerning trolls and their biology as well as cultural norms, but again this is an AU and also *gives you a permit that says “I do what I want”*.

I should also specify that adults are indeed allowed on Alternia in my self insert au and Tagora and Oz are both depicted as 18+

It was a Fall day on Alternia. Well, what someone like Oz would consider Fall weather. The weather on Alternia was anyone’s guess on this bitch of a planet anyways.

Oz was wearing a lovely purple scarf given to him by Gamzee. It was a bit clumsily made at first but Gamzee did his best. With a bit of help from Marvus and Kanaya, the scarf turned out amazing. Gamzee said it was sort of something to “make a brother feel all welcome and shit into the dark carnival family.” The Dark Carnival being the name of the circus run by the purple bloods.It was wild and eccentric, but never left you bored. Then again, boring was never in a purple trolls nature. That’s one of the things Oz liked about them. He was still getting used to being a part of it himself. Though, despite his best efforts, he wonders if he’ll ever truly belong with them, even if he is a purple blood himself.

“But I’m only half,” he whispered to himself. Suddenly, his phone rang interrupting his thoughts. The phone ID said the words “GorGor” on it. Oz answered it without a second thought.

“Hey Gorgor what’s up,” Oz said casually. “Same old as always,” Tagora said with a pleased smirk. “I just called to inquire if you wanted to join me for a nice cup of coffee a bit of a ways into my area. It’s about a 5 minute walk from my office.” “Don’t you usually make your own coffee,” Oz asked. Tagora could be incredibly picky about his coffee. “That’s not what I asked.” Straight to the point as ever. “Or does practice schedule not agree with this,” Tagora asked. It’s true the circus practice schedule left him somewhat busy. Being both a tightrope act and a tarot reader was no joke. Also, not to mention everyone on Alternia wanted to come see the half troll from Earth. It was an overnight sensation.

“Nope, not today. It’s a bit of an off season right now,” Oz answered. “Excellent, meet me by my office in 10. Don’t be late,” he said with a click of the phone. He hung up afterward. “As expected, he never likes to waste time with pleasantries,” Oz said heading towards his office. It was going to be a boring day anyhow. All the other trolls were off doing something or another. Gamzee was having a jam with Tavros, Marvus was off doing god’s knows what, Karako was doing his own little art projects,and etc. Oz would have called Tagora earlier himself, but he didn’t want to bother him in case he was busy. Guess that answers that question.

Luckily, it wasn’t much of a walk to get to Tagora’s place. He kind of knew how to get there by heart by now anyhow. Oz gave a timid knock at the door. He was probably inside not wanting to be outside for as much as possible. This is another reason why Oz was surprised he asked to go to a cafe out of the blue. Being in a somewhat open and social environment isn’t really Tagora’s style. What was going on today? The door opened for Oz and he stepped inside. Tagora was busy getting his coat and scarf. Both in shades of teal and purple. Oz looked around as Tagora quietly got his stuff together. Oz would never stop being impressed with Tagora’s interior decorating nor his cleanliness. It smelled nice too. Wait, was that smell actually Tagora? What scent was he wearing? It was a nice floral scent, but also had a hint of cologne to it. Very nice combination.

“Ready to go,” Tagora said suddenly stepping into Oz’s line of sight. “Oh yeah sure,” Oz still kind of startled. It was then Oz noticed Tagora’s lusus over his shoulder. The ferret gave him a soft bit of acknowledgement. The lusus was already used to his presence.

“Well, then lets go. The seats in this place are sporadic and I don’t like standing around waiting for a table,” Tagora said leading him off. “Oh yeah, good idea,” Oz said following behind him.

“By the way, nice scarf.” Wow, a compliment from Gorgor was as rare as a blue moon. “Thanks. Gamzee, Marvus and Kanaya made it for me. Gamzee wanted to make me a gift,” Oz said giving a sentimental smile. Tagora made a small noise that made him sound almost impressed. “Whats up,” Oz asked. “Nothing just uh...never mind. Coffee shop is up here,” Tagora said clearly avoiding the question.

Oz had passed by this coffee shop a few times himself, but had been putting off going in.There were a few trolls outside. Some clearly art students. Tagora opened the door for Oz to step in. As Oz stepped through, Oz could tell that it wasn’t that crowded. Guess too many people don’t want coffee at this time of day. Pity. It was a nice day for it. Tagora was already off at the counter ordering for what appeared to be both of them. “Wow, not even gonna ask me,”Oz mumbled. Fair enough though. He probably knew more about Alternian coffee and tea than he did at this moment. Being around juggalos meant drinking lots of faygo and water. None of them were really that much of tea or coffee drinkers. Tagora came back with a couple of cups ushering Oz to sit in a nice place downstairs. “It’s a bit quieter down here to be honest. The only people you’ll find down here are people trying to study or writers,” Tagora shrugged picking a table towards the wall. Everything screamed him wanting to be away from people as much as possible. So again, why invite Oz out.

“I ended up ordering you the closest thing to a decaf mocha or whatever it was on the menu.” Now it was Oz’s turn to be impressed. “What? You don’t think I remember your preferences. For shame,” Tagora snarked. “But you didn’t ask,” Oz still kinda confused. “That’s cause I know you’re still having problems reading our writing and you can’t really understand cafe jargon yet I’m guessing. Plus, I know you get nervous in those situations. Your as much of an anxious wreck as I am face facts,” Tagora said in a matter of factly voice. “Plus, you don’t think I remember this stuff? Of course I do.” “Oh yeah. I told you that a few months back didn’t I,” Oz remembered. Tagora was being strangely open today. What was going on? What was up with Tagora period? Did he lose a bet or something?

“Anyways, how’s practice going? No accidents via the tight rope as of late I hope,” Tagora said taking a small sip of what could be described as something with a dark, burboun but very rich scent. Slightly sweet actually. “Meh,I had a close call the other day. Luckily, Gamzee has fast reflexes and a quick panic button,” Oz explained as he took a sip of the mocha. Wow, this was so nice. Tagora really did know what he was doing.

Oz looked up and..wait, was that panic on Tagora’s face. “Hey, you ok,” Oz asked taking notice being a bit concerned. “Yeah um I”m fine.” Liar. Tagora moved to once again change the subject. “They seem to be treating you well. That’s nice to have here on big bad Alternia.” Tagora was apparently trying to prod something out of Oz. “Yeah they are...” Oz said seeming distant. Tagora’s lawyer mind had already detected red flags. “But...” Tagora said getting to the point. Oz was taken aback. Well, no use hiding it now. Oz was used to Tagora being able to see right through him. To be honest, having someone like that around him that can see right through his bullshit is refreshing. “Well....god, how long has it been since I came to Alternia. Like almost a year,” Oz explained. “I’m just...I’m still getting used to the idea of being half Alternian. Ever since Dad found me and explained what he was...what I was...I thought I’d be ok,” Oz continued.

Oz then pointed at the several troll features that were slowly starting to develop on his body. He was in his 20s sure, but he was a late bloomer. His horn had fully grown and his teeth and eyes were following after. “When I started growing these, I was with my mother who didn’t tell me who my father was. My dad didn’t even know he had a kid,” Oz said kind of sadly.

“Does your mom know you’re here,” Tagora asked even though he kind of knew the answer. “No. Dad kind of found out about me on one of his visits to Earth. He wasn’t too happy mom hid me from him. She was kind of an abusive bitch anyhow,” Oz said bluntly. “So, it’s best she doesn’t know.”

“And to be honest, I’ve been getting acquainted at the idea of being a purple blood, but..” Oz cut off trying to find the words to say. Tagora leaned forward with a raised eyebrow. “I have no idea if I really fit in. Like they can rap. I can’t. I don’t have much of the clown thing going for me. What am I? Why am I here? What can I do? I want to be part of them so bad, but what if I can’t.” Oz held his head in his hands semi defeated. This had been bugging him for ages, but was afraid to tell his best friend Gamzee because he was afraid it would make him and the rest of the purple bloods like they weren’t doing a good job. That’s the last thing Oz wanted especially since they have been so welcoming and kind.

The sound of a chair can be heard backing up. The sound of steps moved closer to Oz. Oz looked up to see Tagora placing a gentle hand on his shoulder. “Give me your hands for a minute,” Tagora asked. Oz did as he said. Tagora took them both gently in his hands.

“Listen Oz,” Tagora said rubbing Oz’s hands in little circles with his thumbs,”You really do fit in with them in so many ways. They’re a pretty accepting and laid back bunch, which you are. You may not be able to do what they can do, but it’s ok to be just a little different. I’m pretty sure they are too. They just want you to be a part of their lives Oz. They worry about you. I hope you know that. You’re going to fit in, even if you’re different and you’re not going to lose them. I promise.”

Tagora always did have a habit of getting to the heart of a problem. It was his habit as a lawyer and as someone whose very much sharp as a whip. He may not be able to socialize much, but it’s moments like these where he shines.

“Besides, you’re a circus clown in your own way,” Tagora joked. Oz smirked and laughed a little. “Besides, don’t you have your own song writing and creative writing thing you do. It’s not rap or painting, but it’s your own thing . Trust me when I say you’re definitely one of them,” Tagora smirked.

“Hey Tagora...,” Oz said smiling a little,”Thanks.”

“Hey, I’m here ok. Just don’t be afraid to open up to them ok,” Tagora grabbing the cup from his original seat.

Oz gave a small smile. “Ok but no promises.”

Tagora shrugged. Something told him that’s was as far as he was getting right now. “Anyhow, tell me when your next show is,” Tagora asked.

“Why do you ask,” Oz said with a raised eyebrow. Wouldn’t he hate going to something like that?

“Curious. I want to see where our schedules land,” Tagora answered.

“Oh, in a month. We don’t have as many shows this time of year,” Oz explained. “Noted,” Tagora said taking a sip of his coffee.

Oz took a sip of his as well, but Oz couldn’t help but feel like Tagora was hiding his own secrets. Could just be the mocha or emotional high he was on, but Oz shook it away as just being paranoid.

Tagora walked Oz back to his hive where Gamzee was waiting. “Hey Gorgor. See you helping a brother out,” Gamzee said giving Tagora and small wave. “It’s fine just please use netting under those tight ropes please,” Tagora said in a bit of a naggy tone.

“Oh, you told him about your accident the other day huh,” Gamzee chuckled. “Yeah, but I’m fine as you can see,” Oz sighed. Tagora pulled Oz into a quick hug. “Just take care of yourself ok,” Tagora said before walking back to his own hive.

“So Gamgam, how was your jam quest with Tav” Oz asked letting Gamzee in. The sound of a huge dog was running to the door. The dog lusus was about as big as Oz. That wasn’t saying much seeing as Oz was 5′2.

“Oh you know. Crack some sick motherfucking beats. Lay done some wicked lyrics. Ya know how it is,” Gamzee said petting Oz’s lusus.

“So what you been all up to,” Gamzee asked flopping over onto the couch. “Went to a coffee shop with Tagora. It’s weird. He’s never usually into doing that stuff. He even asked when my next show was. He’s been acting weird all day.”

“Mmmhmmm about that. I was kinda waiting and keeping this little thing all up to myself and shit, but I think you gotta know seeing as it’s not ok to leave a brother confused and all,” Gamzee said. “We’ve been kinda noticing you haven’t been your old beautiful self, so we may have kind of caught Gorgor after one of our shows to lay down the deetz. He goes to all of them you know. I know you be all not up with the facts, but he does. You perform late, so I’m not surprised you don’t up and notice him from your tarot tent,” Gamzee explained.

“Wait, what, but he hates going to places like that.” This was shocking to say the least. “He does don’t get me wrong, but he cares. It’s why he all up and invited you for a feelings jam at the cafe. We told him we kinda had a hunch you hadn’t been yourself and something wasn’t right up in that thinkpan of yours and I think that kinda worried him a bit. We thought that you might be feeling a little out of place, so he thought maybe taking you to more places like a cafe would be a mighty fine solution. I figured that whatever you weren’t ready to be sharing to us you’d share in time. So, may as well get it all out with someone who can help,” Gamzee explained with a small smile.

“So wait he took me to a cafe cause he wanted me to feel comfortable with Alternian life and talk about my problems at the same time,” Oz asked. “Yeeepp,” Gamzee confirmed.

“Oh,” Oz face palmed. That explaines so much. “Shhiittt, he even suggested we make that nice scarf for you. Something about making you feel more at home or whatever. I was trying to use this old thinkpan of mine to think of a motherfucking idea on how to do that and Gorgor be all up and knowing a lot of amazing things, so I asked him,” Gamzee explained.

Well, that explains why he wanted to change the subject. Tagora you absolute goober. “But uh listen my brother, whenever you wanna slam down a cold one and have a good feelings jam, I’m here for ya,” Gamzee said giving Oz a soft but slightly protective hug.

“Actually, can we do that,” Oz asked. May as well. This afternoon with Tagora may have been just what Oz needed.

#self indulgent fics

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Radio Abel, Season Six

Part 4 of 6

The following section takes place after S6M20, "Peacekeeper"

PHIL CHEESEMAN: Hello, ci-ti-zens! Have we got a treat for you.

ZOE CRICK: He's using the word "treat" very loosely.

JODY MARSH: Thanks!

ZOE CRICK: My pleasure.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: With us in the studio is Abel's very own Jody Marsh! Former interim commander-in-chief, and now... um...

JODY MARSH: Just another Abel runner.

ZOE CRICK: Oh, there's nothing just about being an Abel runner. And anyway, you've got a scheme or two of your own going on, haven't you? A little birdy tells me about a certain transmitter you've been building?

PHIL CHEESEMAN: [laughs] Which makes sense. Transmitters make good perches for birds.

ZOE CRICK: It wasn't a literal bird, Phil.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: No, I know. I'm just saying, actual birds would also be well informed about Jody's transmitter.

JODY MARSH: Now that you mention it, we did have a seagull nest in it.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: See?

JODY MARSH: Only we had to get rid of it because it was interfering with the signal.

ZOE CRICK: Oh, but nothing happened to the chicks, right? You definitely rehomed them in as untraumatic a way as possible?

JODY MARSH: Yeah, because I knew you'd never speak to me again if I didn't. And I picked this next song especially for the baby seagulls!

ZOE CRICK: Aw!

PHIL CHEESEMAN: I've seen the plans for that transmitter of yours, Jody. It's an impressive bit of kit.

JODY MARSH: Thanks. I mean, it's a real botch job, but it does the trick. It's let us set up UK-wide comms with a whole bunch of settlements that were cut off from contact before.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: Such a weird thought. You know, there are people out there who've got no idea what's been going on in the rest of the country. I mean, yeah, they've probably noticed the zoms. But the Minister and all the rest of it?

ZOE CRICK: Yeah. And as soon as we fill them in, they'll probably decide she's the best thing since sliced bread. Everyone else seems to think that.

JODY MARSH: It's just the cure. You can't blame people for wanting it.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: I do a bit. Wrong's wrong, whatever it's got to offer you.

JODY MARSH: But they don't know it's wrong. That's the thing. That's why my transmitter's so important. If we could just talk to people. That's what it's all about in the end, talking. You can fight your enemies from dawn until dusk, but until you change their minds, they'll just rise up again in the morning.

ZOE CRICK: Hm. A bit like zombies, in fact.

JODY MARSH: It's not just the UK, either. I'm hoping to get a booster that will let us speak to other countries. The whole world! If I can manage it.

ZOE CRICK: That would be amazing. We could find out what's going on in... well, I don't know. Outer Mongolia!

PHIL CHEESEMAN: We could broadcast the show to them.

JODY MARSH: Lucky Outer Mongolia. Oh! They'd get to listen to something like this!

ZOE CRICK: It must be weird, though.

JODY MARSH: What?

ZOE CRICK: Being in charge and then having Janine come back and suddenly you're [laughs] taking orders again.

JODY MARSH: Not really. I mean, I'd probably do what Janine said even if she wasn't officially in charge. She's just got that sort of personality.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: That's true. She made some comments about my hair getting long the other day and Zoe had to talk me out of getting it buzz cut. Just didn't want to disappoint her.

ZOE CRICK: I'd hate to have had your job, though, Jody. I mean, all that responsibility! [laughs] I can barely take care of myself, let alone half the country.

JODY MARSH: It's funny. I thought I'd find it dead stressful, and it was, but I kinda liked it.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: Inner control freak coming out?

JODY MARSH: No! Well, yeah. I'm not saying I'm not a big old bossy boots, but it was more than that. It made me feel good knowing I was helping people.

ZOE CRICK: You've always helped people, though. You've saved more lives than I've had hot dinners, and I like my food.

JODY MARSH: I've done my bit, but it's easy doing what you're told, isn't it? Making the decisions, the hard decisions, that's a whole different thing. When you do that so other people don't have to, it's like you're... I don't know, uh, lifting this huge burden off them, and they don't even know it. So I'm glad I did it, but I'm glad Janine's carrying it now, as well.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: Well, this one's for you, Janine De Luca. We all owe you one.

BERNARD PRIOR: Fairest listeners, good morrow to you! And what a zippy tune! Did you bliss out? I believe that's the lingo. You might think ruddy old Bernard has never been to a right old rave-up. And you'd be right. But I have been to a concert or two where the bass drums were off the hook. [laughs] Just my little joke. I'm actually very fond of The Smiths in my more soft-shoed moments. More tunes, vicar?

BERNARD PRIOR: Now, as those delicate notes fade away, let's get down to business. Careful listeners, as I am confident you are aware, I, your humble host, doth occasionally attempt to bring a tot of political philosophy to the old airwaves, investigating how ancient ideas of governance and legislature apply to our savage realpolitik red in tooth and claw. However, it is with a heavy heart I must tell you that, as a mere radio presenter, I do have to abide by the diktats of my superiors. More on those diktats after this.

BERNARD PRIOR: So, word from on high is -

AMELIA SPENS: You need to be more accessible to the great unwashed, B.

BERNARD PRIOR: Oh, Amelia. You're here. And could you please watch your phrasing? Many of my listeners have suffered through soap rationing.

AMELIA SPENS: Now Bernard, we have always had soap in Fort Canton. The people who said there was a soap shortage were not to be believed. Who would believe anyone who was so poorly groomed? Anyway, your show going forward. I like to think of it as a sympathetic refurbishment of a well-loved classic. A stylish new jacket on a saggy old body.

BERNARD PRIOR: My show hardly needs refurbishing, or as I suspect, completely demolishing and replacing with a shopping arcade.

AMELIA SPENS: You need to be accessible! Enough of this political philosophy claptrap.

BERNARD PRIOR: One does wonder what could be more accessible, dear hearts, than the machinations of our very systems of governance.

AMELIA SPENS: One word: ratings. Ratings are the powers that be in this game, and Fort Canton Today needs to be more populist, reach a little further than the metropolitan elite. You need to lower your common denominator. Which is why from now on, this show will be mainly movie reviews.

BERNARD PRIOR: Film reviews. I think you'll find in England, we call them films.

AMELIA SPENS: Oh, whatever. Good grief. And stop sulking! This reboot comes with perks.

BERNARD PRIOR: I'm delighted to let you know, listeners, Amelia is referring to a glittering stack of old VHS cassettes and a top-loading player supplied to old Bernard precisely for such noble pursuits. [sighs] So stay tuned, fragrant listeners, for Bernard's government-sanctioned thoughts on flicks.

AMELIA SPENS: Oh, cheer up, B! You might enjoy it.

BERNARD PRIOR: Could it not at least be the high arts? Opera, ballet, classical music. Something to delight the senses, something I can bring a bit of my special Bernard magic to. A sprinkling of wonder.

AMELIA SPENS: Oh, I think this will be magical enough for anyone.

BERNARD PRIOR: And there's no, I don't know, conflict of interest here?

AMELIA SPENS: Whatever do you mean?

BERNARD PRIOR: Are you, Miss Spens, using your political position to influence the media in a way that benefits your personal business interests?

AMELIA SPENS: Bernard, you need to stop listening to the haters.

ZOE CRICK: So, a little birdy told me that you went on a date last night.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: Is this the same birdy that kept you informed about Jody's transmitter?

ZOE CRICK: Yeah. [laughs] It's a birdy with a wide and varied range of interests. A renaissance birdy, if you will. So, how did it go?

PHIL CHEESEMAN: Oh, it was lovely!

ZOE CRICK: Really?

PHIL CHEESEMAN: Yeah! It was so funny. When she saw me, she flung her arms straight around me.

ZOE CRICK: Wow. Quick worker.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: Turned out I looked just like her brother who's been missing since Day Zero.

ZOE CRICK: Oh.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: Yeah! So then she had a bit of a cry, and then she took me back to her room.

ZOE CRICK: Oh. More promising.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: To look at all these family albums she'd managed to save. It was really moving.

ZOE CRICK: Right. Then did you shag?

PHIL CHEESEMAN: What? No! I look like her brother. That would be weird.

ZOE CRICK: So when you said it was lovely, you actually meant it was a complete disaster?

PHIL CHEESEMAN: No, she's a really nice person! I hope we can be friends.

ZOE CRICK: [laughs] Philip Cheeseman, what am I going to do with you?

BERNARD PRIOR: Hail, gentle listeners. Ahoy-hoy and aloha and welcome. Barricade those windows, sit back, crack open your ration packs, and get ready for muster. Point of interest, your intrepid raconteur Bernaldo has received many a missive about our upcoming change of tack. I am of course delighted to report that I've had a fair number of angry screeds lamenting the loss of my political insights.

For example, "Are you being silenced?" writes Heartbroken in Radial. Oh, Broken, I can assure you, Bernard will never be silenced by the Man! Or the Woman.

STEVE SISSAY: Hello, loves. Welcome back to A Guide to Effective Problem-Solving and Conflict Resolution, an audio series with me, your explosive host, Steve Sissay. I'm going to be talking to you about one of my two favorite things, explosives. And perhaps you can have a guess at the other one while you listen to this.

TEVE SISSAY: So, time for a few basics. There are three ways to make an explosion. There's a chemical reaction. That's your old nitroglycerin, your Semtex, your C-4, all based on reactions that release a hell of a lot of energy. That's why we like to make sure we stand well back. Never return to a bomb once the fuse is lit. [laughs]

Then you have your pressure releases, gas canisters and so on. And of course, finally, we have nukes. Eh, fair enough, when that's the effect you want. But for my money, they lack intimacy. I don't like to be reckless. Well, I do like to be a little reckless sometimes. But when I do blow something up, I do like to feel the heat on my face. That's a lot less fun with a nuke.

STEVE SISSAY: I know what you're thinking. All right, sunshine, nice talk, but how do I get my paws on them? And for that, you're going to have to consider an age-old question: shop bought or homemade? Give it a ponder.

STEVE SISSAY: Okay, so you've decided you want the ready-mades first. Sensible choice for the busy saboteur on the run. So where are you going to get them? Everyone's first thought: Army bases! Only trouble with that? It was everyone's first thought. If you can find an Army munitions store that isn't cleared out or occupied, you're a better forager than me. And trust me, you're not a better forager than me. Besides, come a little closer. Let uncle Steven tell you a little something. There's someone out there who had a lot more explosives stock-piled than the Army. See if you can work out who it is during this.

STEVE SISSAY: [laughs] Okay, okay. No more suspense. Where's the best place to hunt down explosives? Well, loves, it's mines. Old mines! The mining industry used more explosives than anyone, and a lot of mines are abandoned with fully-stocked storerooms. So grab yourself a hard hat and go mining for your own treasure. Fill your boots with lovely, lovely ammonium nitrate emulsions. Now be careful none of the cartridges are leaking, and maybe don't actually put them in your boots. Bring a metal box with you.

ZOE CRICK: Are those bags I can see under your eyes?

PHIL CHEESEMAN: Mm. [sips coffee] Maybe.

ZOE CRICK: They definitely are. And that's your third cup of coffee. Was someone out late last night?

PHIL CHEESEMAN: Yes, fine. I was on a date last night.

ZOE CRICK: Ooh, and it was a late one!

PHIL CHEESEMAN: Well, the weather's been so nice, I thought we could go for a moonlight picnic.

ZOE CRICK: Nice! You've got game.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: Yeah, but I think the game in question might be Ludo.

ZOE CRICK: Oh God, what happened?

PHIL CHEESEMAN: Well, I thought it would be slightly less romantic if any zombies joined us for the picnic, so we did it inside Abel grounds.

ZOE CRICK: So far, so sensible.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: I took Christine around the back of the strawberry fields. Only no one told me Janine had been using it as a training ground for new runners.

ZOE CRICK: Your date's still alive, right?

PHIL CHEESEMAN: Yeah, but we stumbled over this, uh, trap Janine had put on the path.

ZOE CRICK: Oh, bloody hell.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: It's okay. I saw it in time and shouted at her to mind out.

ZOE CRICK: Oh, thank goodness.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: Only me shouting gave her such a shock, she tripped and fell in one of Janine's camouflaged pits. She broke her collarbone and her left leg.

ZOE CRICK: It's like you've got this special talent for disaster.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: Mm. Maxine says she's going to be fine. She's in quite a lot of pain, though. I swapped all those Ordnance Survey maps I've been hoarding for enough morphine to see her through. But understandably, she's not that keen on seeing me. So, um... [sips coffee] this one's by way of an apology.

BERNARD PRIOR: And I have another communiqué here that begins "Mon Cher Bernard." Oh. Excuse me, listeners. This is perhaps my first frisky fanmail. I was warned this would happen, but it had actually been a longer wait than I understood was usual. Of course, in the interest of chivalry, I can't share most of it, but I will say thank you to – oh, let me see who it's from.

Oh. Goodness. Margot. Margot, I... Gosh. Listeners, I must inform you, in the interest of radio transparency, that I am blushing. Oh my. And there's a P.S. here. "I must tell you, Bernard, that although I suggested we should meet, it will be difficult as I am currently in Chalk Valley." Oh. Oh no.

STEVE SISSAY: You're listening to Steve Sissay, and this is A Guide to Effective Problem-Solving and Conflict Resolution. That wasn't my first choice of title, by the way. I wanted to call the show Going Kaboom! With Steve Sissay. But um, yeah. Some people thought that was a little frivolous.

STEVE SISSAY: Now before I move on to talking about DIY explosions, I've had a letter from a listener. I'm broadcasting from a highly secret location, so there are really only a handful of people this could be from, listeners. I know who I hope it's from. [paper rustles] Ah yes. "Dear Steven, what is your favorite kind of explosion?" Well now, [laughs] I think that's a rather personal question, but I'll see if I can think of an answer suitable to broadcast during this song.

STEVE SISSAY: There is one kind of explosion I love maybe more than all the others. It's not one that has a lot of practical applications, but it is glorious. Say it with me: dust explosion. Have you ever seen a great pyrotechnic effect in a movie? The way the air seems to catch fire. That's not actually what it'd look like if you planted Semtex. But to get that beautiful effect, they often use the technique of suddenly igniting a high concentration of flammable particles in the air.

Ever heard of a grain silo explosion? Same thing. Dust in the air suddenly catching light all at once. Beautiful. And often fatal. Not something you're often able to use to your advantage, but if there's a high concentration of organic particles in the air and you've got a suitable source of ignition, it could be time for a light show.

STEVE SISSAY: Back to DIY. Of course, it used to be that if you tried to leave your local DIY store with a trolley full of fertilizer and drain cleaner, you'd get your credit card details passed to GCHQ. Nowadays, it's easy pickings. Life's a lot simpler when you don't have to queue at the checkout. DIY downsize, or of course, fighting zombies in the aisles. Although I always feel if I'm going to fight zombies, a shop that sells chainsaws is the place to do it.

ZOE CRICK: So?

PHIL CHEESEMAN: Don't.

ZOE CRICK: How did the date go?

PHIL CHEESEMAN: I know what you're asking. Don't.

ZOE CRICK: Oh, you can't tell me this one went badly. I spent weeks finding Lulu for you. She was your perfect woman. For God's sake, she even likes The Alan Parsons Project. Do you know rare that is in a person who's otherwise sane?

PHIL CHEESEMAN: I know. That was the problem. She was too perfect. Started worrying I was going to mess it up. So I chickened out and canceled the date.

ZOE CRICK: Okay. Well, that's pathetic, but not disastrous. You just need to arrange another one.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: Yeah, but the thing is... when I was radioing her to tell her I couldn't come, I couldn't think of an excuse, so um... I told her I had – [whispers] genital warts.

ZOE CRICK: You what?!

PHIL CHEESEMAN: I panicked. It's the first thing I thought of.

ZOE CRICK: You needed an excuse, and that was the first thing that came to mind? No, don't tell me why. I don't want to know.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: So obviously I can't ask her out now.

ZOE CRICK: But you don't have -

[speaking simultaneously]

PHIL CHEESEMAN: Don't say it!

ZOE CRICK: - genital warts!

[speaking in turn]

ZOE CRICK: Okay, but you don't have the thing you won't let me say.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: I know.

ZOE CRICK: So tell her. Or I'll tell her. I mean, that's not a conversation I ever wanted to have, but for the sake of your love life, I'll do it.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: Oh, thanks, but there's no point. My name is now indelibly associated in her mind with... that. It's bound to be a bit of a passion-killer.

ZOE CRICK: [sighs] I despair. All right, listeners, this one's for anyone out there who really is suffering from... that

BERNARD PRIOR: You know what I miss about the old days, listeners? Ah, so many things. The Times crossword. Not that old Bern completed more than a clue or two, and that was on a good day. But it was a comfort to know it was there. A stroll though the woods in autumn. A pot of cocoa with nutmeg on top. And call me a nostalgic old fool, but I do miss being able to visit long lost true loves without several sets of travel papers. You know, the simple things.

BERNARD PRIOR: Dearest friends, I have to confess, Bernard is no movie buff. I can enjoy a night at the flicks as much as anyone, of course. I have a soul. I can be moved. But I would not call myself a connoisseur of the art of the motion picture. However, I watched Jurassic Park last night, and I did find it rather jolly. And surprisingly, full of practical tips. Stay tuned. My full review after this.

BERNARD PRIOR: So, fateful friends, Jurassic Park. Quite the survival guide. Are there so many differences between a Tyrannosaurus rex and a large zombie? Maybe not. Should we all take the time to learn how to reboot a Unix system? Perhaps not all of us. That would surely be overkill.

But never underestimate taking a nerd of some description on your raiding party. Who knows when you'll need to break into a computerized system or reconfigure the power grid? Mr. Spielburg sending a worthwhile lesson to us all, I think. And as for philosophy, there was much to muse on. Life will find a way, eh, Mr. Goldblum? But whose life, ours or theirs?

Jurassic Park was quite the timely reminder that our world has been a home to great change already. The seasons turn, as do the dominant species'. Bernie's rating: four shining stars. Heavens above. Now Amelia Spens, our glorious benefactor, tells me it's imperative I inform you that the VHS cassette of Jurassic Park is available to rent from Fort Canton General Stores for a modest fee.

STEVE SISSAY: I've had another letter. From the handwriting, this is from the same person, and uh – [paper rustles] Ah, yes. [laughs] You want to know about the explosions that aren't fit for broadcast? [laughs] Excuse me, listeners. I'm going to have to take this one off-air.

AMELIA SPENS: How's it going, Mr. B?

BERNARD PRIOR: Oh! A surprise visit, dear heart. How thoughtful. I reviewed a film. Did you hear?

AMELIA SPENS: I did. Excellent job. There is really no need to reference zombies so much. It's not like we're going to forget about them as we run from hordes of them, have to kill our loved ones who've turned into them, and scavenge for food in an unimaginable hellscape.

BERNARD PRIOR: I've not noticed you doing any of those things.

AMELIA SPENS: Well, of course not. I have no loved ones.

BERNARD PRIOR: Shrewd as ever.

AMELIA SPENS: Thank you. But please try and remember, people tune in to Fort Canton Today for escapism. Bread and circuses, B.

BERNARD PRIOR: That's all very well, but how about subjects relevant to peoples' lives?

AMELIA SPENS: Oh, like what? Another lecture on the thoughts of Desmond Hume?

BERNARD PRIOR: David Hume.

AMELIA SPENS: People have enough mortal threats to worry about without you boring them to death.

BERNARD PRIOR: How about some investigative journalism?

AMELIA SPENS: [sighs] What do you have in mind?

BERNARD PRIOR: A deep dive into the free movement of people.

AMELIA SPENS: I can't do anything about the wall.

BERNARD PRIOR: How about Chalk Valley?

AMELIA SPENS: Chalk Valley voted to take themselves out of our free state coalition. And if they don't want people from Radial moving there, we can't really let people from Chalk Valley go wherever they want, can we? They've made their position clear, and if they like isolation so much, let's leave them to it.

BERNARD PRIOR: Ahoy-hoy to thee, fragrant listeners. It is I, your genial host and humble servant, Bernard Prior, bringing you all you need to know about life in New – Fort Canton. Welcome once more to Fort Canton Today.

And hark, fellow Cantonians. I've had another missive from a treasured listener. In this particular case, the rather improbably named Quiffy Boy. Well met, young Quiffy, who writes, "Dear Bernard, are you really a fan of The Smiths, or were you joking? If it was a joke, please do not joke about such things. Morrissey and Marr were a genius combination, the like of which we will never see again. On the other hand, if you are a fan, please tell us your favorite track. Regards, Quiffy Boy."

Well now, young Quiffy, perhaps this tune will answer your plaintive query.

BERNARD PRIOR: I am, of course, just joking. I adore Manchester's finest export, [?]. My favorite track... well, what difference does it make? [laughs] And you know Quiffy, as a boy, I had a pet rat called Morrissey. And handsome black and brown fellow he was, and so smart, he could have been a city stockbroker. Quite the furry adventurer, always mounting bold escapes from his cage and going to terrify Father or other such derring-do. Quite the devilish rogue, he was.

So named because on several of his bids for freedom, he was caught snacking on Mother's gladioli. I gave him a Viking burial on the local pond when he finally passed. Such a sight. That flaming shoebox sinking beneath the pondweed brought a soulful tear to the eye of your genial host's teenage self. [sniffs]

BERNARD PRIOR: And you know something, patient listeners? I threw a nubbin of best-aged Stilton into that pond every year until I left home for the big bad world. Good night, sweet Morrissey the rat, wherever you are now. This one's for you.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: Hello, citizens. Thank you for tuning in to us today when we've got the beautiful and talented Jody Marsh back in the studio with us. She can knit a jumper like you wouldn't believe and has clocked some of the fastest times for the Macks Pharmacy run of any Abel runner.

JODY MARSH: Uh, thanks!

ZOE CRICK: [laughs] Don't worry. He's been practicing compliments. [whispers] For his dates.

JODY MARSH: [whispers] Oh, I see.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: [clears throat] Jody's here to talk about the political situation in our country today.

JODY MARSH: Am I?

PHIL CHEESEMAN: Uh... yep. We're a nation divided along complicated social and political lines, and you're here to give Abel's perspective on the current situation?

JODY MARSH: Oh. Um, well, Zoe said she'd just run out of good jokes, and would I mind coming on the show and spouting any old nonsense for a few minutes until she thinks up some more?

ZOE CRICK: To be fair, that is actually a direct quote.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: Right. Well, I don't think that's really a great use of Radio Name Pending's airtime, so we'll be back with some serious discussion right after this.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: That song was chosen by Jody Marsh, former commander-in-chief of Abel Township, who's with us in the studio right now.

ZOE CRICK: Jody's here to talk about the current socioeconomic situation, apparently.

JODY MARSH: Uh, actually, I was thinking. I can bang on about Abel's side of things and Abel's version of the story until the cows come home, but the only people who'll believe me are the ones who already do.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: That's not true.

JODY MARSH: No, I think it is. So maybe I could just answer peoples' questions on Rofflenet? You can do that, right? Get people to send in questions?

ZOE CRICK: Oh, definitely. Although... if they're anything like the name suggestions we've had -

JODY MARSH: Well, I'll take the chance.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: Okay. Yeah. Yeah, I like that. All right, citizens. If you've got a question for Jody Marsh -

JODY MARSH: Any question at all, really.

ZOE CRICK: Any question broadcastable on a family show.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: Uh, send it to us on Rofflenet, and Jody'll answer you. In the meantime, have you got another tune for us, Jody?

JODY MARSH: Yeah. This is one that – actually, this one always makes me think of Runner Five, Abel's head of runners. Hope you enjoy it.

ZOE CRICK: Welcome back, listeners. And some of you have been very quick off the mark because we've got our first question for Jody Marsh, Abel Township's former commander-in-chief.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: And the first question is... oh. Uh, I'm not sure I should read that.

JODY MARSH: I said I'd answer anything.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: Oh it's, well... Okay. "Where do you get off fighting the Minister when all she wants to do is unite the country and get us back on our feet? You should be ashamed of yourself."

ZOE CRICK: I'm not sure there's actually much of a question in there.

JODY MARSH: No, there is. And it's a good one. Because what we're doing is creating more chaos than if we weren't doing it. If we just surrendered, the country would be more peaceful, but the thing is, it wouldn't be more free and it wouldn't be more fair. The price the Minister wants for peace is much too high. She won't settle for anything less than total obedience. And once she's got it, once she can do whatever she wants, you'll find out what she's really like.

Whoever you are that asked that question, you've only seen her nice face because right now, you're not a threat to her. But step out of line and you'll see the Sigrid we here at Abel have known all along: the monster who can kill and torture without conscience. That's why we don't surrender, why we'll never surrender. We want to save anyone else from having to face that monster.

ZOE CRICK: Yeah. Yeah. That's exactly right. Jody'll be back to answer more questions right after this.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: Ah, thank God. This is a much nicer question. "Jody, if you could go back to the world before the zombies for just one day, what would you do?

JODY MARSH: I'd spend it with my family.

ZOE CRICK: Oh, that's a rubbish answer.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: Zoe!

ZOE CRICK: No, but I mean, we'd all spend it with our families. Of course we would. I mean, apart from people who had really awful families, and they'd probably spend it with their friends. But what would you actually do? One day, the old world, no zoms. The world's your oyster.

JODY MARSH: Okay. I need to have a think about that.

PHIL CHEESEMAN: Don't go anywhere, citizens!

#zombies run #zrs6 #s6 radio #s6 radio part 4 #zr transcript

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