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/vent post

if anyone has nice words, my job is making me come in tomorrow when i’m 90% sure i have covid

to stare at a screen for eight hours

in a room of fluorescent lights

i’m not upset nooooooo

That moment when you’re writing something quite positive as a totally informal manga reaction, skipping over one single small visual detail because it was both so insignificant you didn’t even notice it at first, and it would also contextually be so heavily overshadowed by something far more important everywhere around it, only to log on somewhere one fateful day and see that it is precisely said detail which has become gospel, despite the fact that it makes rather little sense in canon.

Ah well, I say as if I were to let it go, knowing very well the tags will be another literary work again.

I’ve felt a little peace lately in the consideration that I’d be okay if I didn’t end up married with children

tag ramble pt.1

got an email that i have a phone appointment with the job centre in 2 weeks and i’m having a completely normal well adjusted reaction to this (lying)

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tomorrow is a federal holiday so i’m supposed to have the day off work, BUT the parents i nanny for are incredibly stressed out so they asked if i’d be willing to come in if they paid me double my salary for the day. so, tomorrow is going to be a really long chaotic day, but i’m buying myself a very expensive candle at the end of it so i think it’ll be worth it.

im only 24 i shouldnt feel so much apathy all the time . i just feel stuck im stuck in glue and i cant get out

a thing that i have noticed about surprise parties is that very rarely are they actually planned with the recipient of the surprise in mind

how immature is it of me that i really really really don’t want to sleep in the same bed as someone else, and i’d rather just sleep on the couch, and i’m irritated that i’ve heavily implied this but anna keeps switching the sleeping arrangement so that i always end up having to share but it’s supposed to be a treat for me, bc i get to sleep in a bed. and it’s so impossible to push back and tell her what i want bc i know it’ll offend her somehow. like i haaaaate sharing a bed bc i hate having to monitor how i move and breathe and shift bc it reminds me too much of how controlled and vigilant and on edge i have to be around my family anyways, and bedtime is literally the only time i get to just have some goddamn space

Genuinely gonna cry cause I saw the most disgusting thing ( literally what’s new I get new traumas at least once a day LMAO )

I know a lot of people say the opposite happened for them but I find I am much less tolerant of being alone for prolonged periods of time after quarantine happened. Maybe that’s due to the fact that even before quarantine I was typically alone; and now that I’m moved out of my parents house I actually have opportunities to hang out with people and have used those opportunities often, I now know how it feels to not be alone constantly. It’s nice to not be alone all the time but sometimes I miss the fact I would be able to just do stuff alone more often. Now it feels almost impossible to do things without even the motivation of showing someone what I’ve done

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every time i go to parties, i’m reminded of why i DON’T go to parties .

entreated that point where i have a crush on every hot cute person i see but tbh i don’t mind it’s nice to like people for once and not scowl at everyone i see 🥸