#so I’m dying physically mentally and emotionally atm | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

suhyla · 3 years

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I am the anon who mentioned that I never send my pictures to any potentials unless we have informed our families first. I am in a bit of dilemma atm because there is this one guy who has been in love with me for more than 3 years, however, back then he was studying and now he is trying to find a job and he hasn't seen me yet. I did not consider him up until a few months ago and he has been trying very hard to make things halal but unfortunately due to the pandemic, things have been very difficult for us and especially him trying to find a good job because unfortunately from where I come from, students are exploited due to their lack of experience and it results in deterioration of their mental health and on the other hand, in my culture, families do not agree for a guy who doesn't have a job or consider him worthy enough for their daughter. There have been difficulties amongst us due to same reason not in the sense where he has been pressurizing me in any manner but because of the fact that now it has genuinely become a fear of his since he had a terrible accident where now he worries that Lord forbid something happens to him and he passes away, he would have died not having seen me and I genuinely have no clue and do not have any idea how to help with this fear of his because he now feels overwhelmed with such thoughts but on the contrary, I genuinely do not want to compromise on my morals and values either knowing I never have for anyone else and I do not know what to do or how to deal with this. Should I send him my picture? What is the right thing for me to do in this particular instance? His sister knows about me but unfortunately we haven't been able to involve any of our other family members due to the fact that he doesn't have a job.

So all of this is completely my opinion as an outsider. I do recommend you ask a scholar for advice on this, as this is merely my advice as your sister inshaAllah.

First of all, it sounds like he has deep trauma and he should really seek therapy to ensure it doesn't affect how he lives his own life, or come in the way of his future relationships. To feel like he's constantly going to die can be tangled with deep psychological issues and may affect your marriage in many ways, sister. I hope you understand that before marrying him. You should encourage him to seek help first, especially as you don't know the extent to which this affects him personally, and consequently, the extent to which it will affect your marriage. Him getting therapy will help you both understand what needs extra care in the relationship. It will help him with his own self awareness so he doesn't unintentionally hurt you by projecting his fears on you, and likewise, you will be more sensitive to what caused him to feel like this and will be better able to love him in the way he needs. But again, this might be really emotionally taxing so please consider that carefully before marrying him inshaAllah.

Moreover, your parents' concern is understandable, as every parent wants their daughter to be well cared for so there is nothing wrong with ensuring he has a job first. I completely sympathize with his situation, and understand that it can be challenging. However, my concern is you right now - you do have to consider who will pay your bills and provide for you and your kids. You know his situation better than me, of course, and what potential work in his field looks like, what are the realistic chances of him getting employed soon. Although I'm sorry that they won't even speak to the brother to see what exactly is the situation on his side. I'm certain he must have other qualities inshaAllah which are making you consider him regardless of the fact that he doesnt have a job.

And finally, I understand that he might be traumatized and dying without seeing you is a genuine concern he has. However, if I was in your shoes, and there is a concern about my parents agreeing about him in the first place, I would not feel comfortable sending him my picture. Moreover, I'm unclear as to whether this brother's concern about passing away is due to a physical condition as a result of the accident or if it is severe anxiety?

You don't sound like you're comfortable doing this either way, but there may be different permissibility guidelines depending on the situation. Regardless, you do not owe anyone your photos, and are not obligated to sacrifice your values for someone who is not yet your husband, and Allah knows best.

I would not regret not showing him my picture (if God forbid anything happened to him) as at the end of the day Allah did not write for us to get married, so what use would my picture be for him?

In the case that this is a result of severe anxiety about his future, and not a rational fear, you say he has loved you for years without seeing you, so what difference does it make if he has to wait a little while longer before seeing you?

Plus, you're not his mother and don't even know if your parents will agree to him. You're not obligated to accommodate his fears like this.

That's how I see it, at least. Again, I recommend getting a scholar's opinion, as well.

and if anyone here has other advice, or if I said anything wrong, please feel free to share inshaAllah.

#and Allah knows best #asks

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gorgonwoman · 6 years

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can you rec good female monster horror movies?

asdfghj to be completely honest i don’t actually know a lot of horror movies? i’m not very good at watching movies and i get scared really easily so i don’t often watch them. i think joey @tenderbeasts posted a rec list of monstrous female horror movies here.

i can recommend other things though? some of these women won’t be technically monstrous but run maybe parallel to it.

the claymore series; it’s a manga/anime, and it’s my absolute favorite. the summary is this: “in a world where monsters called Yoma prey on humans and live among them in disguise, humanity’s only hope is a new breed of warrior known as Claymores. half human, half monster, these silver-eyed slayers possess supernatural strength, but are condemned to fight their savage impulses or lose their humanity completely.” it’s got very nearly everything i like in a series. it doesn’t sexualize them really either, which is honestly huge for a manga/anime? it does have nudity, but it presents it in a way that is meant to be horrifying. it doesn’t have explicit gayness but if you read between the lines it’s there. it has women who fight their monstrosity and women who embrace their monstrosity, it’s got a majorly female cast of characters (claymores are only women). and the main character, clare, is so interesting; she’s obsessed with vengeance, stubborn as hell, never gives up even if every odd is against her, and we get to watch her grow emotionally and physically stronger throughout the entire thing. i’d really recommend it. (if you want triggers you can message me -- it would make this too long if i listed them here.)

the monstress series; this one is a comic by marjorie liu and sana takeda. it’s ‘set in an alternate world of art deco beauty and steampunk horror.’ i’ve heard it called an asian matriarchy. it’s about maika halfwolf, a ‘teenage survivor of a cataclysmic war between humans and their hated enemies, the arcanics.’ marjorie liu says this about it: “monstress was more a desire than an idea. an impulse that came over me, something i’d think about in the shower or when i was driving and listening to janet jackson on the radio. i had this image in my head of a battered girl standing alone, absolutely furious, and behind her a battlefield that stretched for miles. i didn’t know what to do with it -- and i’’m not all that patient -- but i had no choice in this matter. nothing was there. no story. just the girl. i don’t know anything about war, not having lived through one. but my grandparents experienced the devastation of war firsthand in china. in their stories surviving was more horrifying than dying. surviving required a desire to live more powerful than any bomb or army, a summoning of superhuman resilience to keep going, day after day. [...] and the victims of this horror had to learn how to first survive...and then survive the surviving. [...] and the root of my desire, i finally realized, was to tell a story about what it means to be a survivor. a survivor, not just of a cataclysmic war, but of racial conflict and its antecedent: hatred. and to confront the question: how does one whom history has made a monster escape her monstrosity? how does one overcome the monstrousness of others without succumbing to a rising monstrousness within?” the art is beautiful. the story is deeply enchanting. i’d recommend this one perhaps more than claymore.

and i darken, and its sequels, by kiersten white; this one is not technically about a female monster, but i’d say lada comes as close as a human can get. it’s about the historical vlad dracul reimagined as a cis girl. she’s brutal. she’s wild. she’s angry, she uncontrollable, she’s badass, she’s amazing. i’ve read the first book honestly dozens of times -- once i got to the end i’d flip back to the first page and start again. lada is incredible. the writing is beautiful. i love it. the book also has a sympathetic portrayal of islam -- lada dislikes their kingdom for personal reasons, but her brother radu (who is everything she is not: beautiful, tender, kind) converts to it, finds home and safety in it. spoiler -- he’s also gay. (lada appears to be straight, which is ridiculous, but there are other lesbians) i haven’t read the last book yet because i’m rereading the other two first, but i’m sure it’ll have a good ending. i really trust kiersten white on this one.

sharp objects by gillian flynn; this one is more female villainy, but still. i posted a quote from her about this book not too long ago; i’d repost it, but i don’t want to make this post too long dfghj -- in essence this is gillian flynn’s exploration of female cruelty and villainy -- it’s about bad women, it’s about female dark sides, none of the women in this are portrayed very kindly and that’s the point. it’s flynn getting tired of sugar-sweet women-are-meant-to-be-nurturing women-aren’t-cruel-like-men women-can’t-do-genuine-bad-things narratives and writing her own where absolutely none of the women are 2D kind and simple.

the last werewolf series by glen duncan; this one i’m a bit iffy on recommending -- it’s got beautiful prose, and talulla is just as much a monster as her male counterparts are, but it’s got some.... issues. for example, the first book (with a male narrator) -- jake never refers to cis female genitals as anything other than c*nts. (at one point he literally says he’s not a misogynist because of the way he fucks women.) the ending of the first book is interesting though, and unexpected. the second one is with talulla’s point of view. she’s better than jake, but there is a point (spoiler) where a man is raped, and she’s mocking about it. (”women go through that every day, why are you whining?”) that part honestly kind of ruined the book for me, and duncan does punish her for this mentality, i’m sure you can imagine how (only attempted though, we don’t read a graphic rape, which i’m sure duncan would have included if he thought it would have worked). i haven’t read the final book and i’m not sure if i will -- the things i’ve heard about it are -- strange, to say the least.

the book of the ancestor series by mark lawrence; beginning with red sister, followed by grey sister, and the third one not due to be released until april 2019, this is honestly one of my new favorite books. it’s brutal and incredible and it’s about assassin nuns with a completely new religion in a fantasy setting (and some of them are lesbians!!). nona’s growth is really interesting to read and her interactions with her fellow novices are kinda what makes red sister. i’ve talked about this series a lot so i won’t do that again here but honestly, read it

carrie, of course, the book and the movies, i love the book more though, probably just because it gives more information on what carrie is thinking, i haven’t read it in awhile so i don’t have very many thoughts on it rn to give fghjk

ask baba yaga: otherworldly advice for everyday troubles by taisia kitaiskaia; this book is absolutely gorgeous, the writing is haunting and incredible and i’m really into baba yaga lately so finding this book was a godsend. it’s based on an actual advice column the author ran on a website whose name i forget atm -- she collected some of her answers into a book and published it, and i’m so glad she did.

i’m just gonna end this here because this got a lot longer than i intended sdfghj (i had more books planned to share too!). i’m sorry i couldn’t exactly give you what you asked for, i really don’t watch that many horror movies, i’m not into gore or too much violence or anything like that, and i dislike having to google triggers before a movie and getting spoiled for the whole thing. if you want more book recs though you can hmu :0

oh also! the monstrous feminine by barbara creed! it’s not fiction but it’s an examination of female monstrosity in film and i’d really recommend it!

#anonymous #long post /#female monstrosity #recs #listen ! i am very sorry i couldn't be of more help fghjk #i usually just read stuff #like honestly most of what i do every day is read books #if you read these im me and tell me what you thought!#and okay to rb!!

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dottenator · 5 years

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@hussie

Respectfully....

WHAT THE FUCK

One little note before I begin my serious thoughts: Hussie how could you kill the Mayor? It absolutely pales in comparison to everyting else, but come on dude.

I'm gonna try to work out my frustrations in the order I read these, meat and then candy, so....

Meat

How dare you do this to Dirk.

That's the thing which keeps sticking to me, honestly. They won! The game is over, Dirk has friends who love him, why this?? Why is Dirk destined to go completely nuts and do such horrible and awful things, ciolating the mental autonomy of everyone he supposedly cares about? Jake and Jane's feelings in the earlier parts of the epilogue, before the meddling becomes so overt, are significantly more creepy and invasive once it becomes clear that Dirk is making them think like this. The way they break down with his influence removed is horrifying. Dirk is such a fantastic character and I'm supposed to accept that he never grows out of thinking he can control everyone? That I'm not allowed an epilogue in which he calms the fuck down and lets himself not be in charge? I don't care at this point of that's considered wish fulfillment, give him a HAPPY ENDING for once. Not this bullshit. I'm not even gonna call that ~~Ultimate Self~~ thing by the name of the character I love. He doesn't deserve this.

Rose and Kanaya were our one good thing, and then this?? Dirk fucks with Rose's autonomy and fragile mental state to trick her away from her wife forever? The Rosemary wedding was the best thing about the original snapchat epilogue. The two of them are perfect for each other, they were happy god damn it, and I don't like any brand of storytelling that decides to split up the immortal god lesbians for pointless egotistical drama. Kanaya's fury and grief when she's allowed control over her own thoughts again is the most terrifying thing, because it really shows just how far from their understood, canon selves they really were in this epilogue. (The use of the word canon is really touchy to me after All This, but atm it's the best way to describe "the characterization we all know and love from previously established sources")

Everyone died beating English. Sure, why not. All the ghosts, Vriska, the teen kids, John everyone. It makes me unbelievably sad to imagine any of them dying (maybe not the ghosts), but with all the rest of this steaming pile of bullshit characterization I'm almost numb to it. Terezi is refreshingly real, still herself and completely believable, but when she gets back to Earth C she just. Doesn't talk to anyone? Doesn't get in touch with John or Karkat, doesn't tell anyone at all that John is dead? Why??? I'm baffled here. There's no closure to anything about Terezi here, except her personal emotions on Vriska, and who knows how valid that catharsis is with the fucking mind control narrative device everywhere. Also, fuck Hussie for making me read anyone claiming that John isn't important, or relevant, or an incredible and unique character. Was the Candy postscript supposed to imply she ended up with Dirk and Rose?? Why??? What the fuck is even going on here?????

Dave and Karkat were usually a balm to the whole bullshit, but like everything else they too are tainted by the overwhelming lack of consent in this whole epilogue. Do I think Dave and Karkat are a cute couple who should be together? Yeah. Do I think it should happen like that? Fuck no!!! They're both clearly uncomfortable with the whole situation, it all feels like an incredible violation of privacy and consent, and then right at the end it implies that Karkat isn't comfortable with how it happened and is oushing Dave away because of it! Like, fuck!!! This isn't what anyone wanted to happen! Let them figure themselves out on their own terms, with no weird narrative devices pushing them into it. Who cares how long it takes, they're all immortal!!!!!

Roxy is a cornerstone honestly. The narrative can't touch him, and I love him for it. Good for him. I really don't have anything to say on Roxy in meat, he's just fine, due largely to his immunity to the narrative bullshit.

Jane.......... I'm not sure. The bits from her point of view (though it's really unclear how much is her and how much is the narrative's influence) paint her as having some kind of reason for her troll-related policies, but really? There's no excuse for them. What the FUCK, Jane. Why does her entire future have to be molded by the influence of Condy? Can't we have a future without uncomfortable Trump parallels and the assertation that a beloved character is an asshole who wants to quash the rights of an entire species? Please Hussie I'm so tired.

Jake just makes me sad tbh. Don't have a lot to say on him. The narrative has been abusing him since Act 6 started, and the new narrative doesn't let up. Give this boy a break, I'm begging you.

In conclusion on Meat:

The parts where the muse is in charge, or where the narrative steps back and allows the characters to be themselves, are amazing. Fuck everything else, and fuck Hussie for making me read it. I'm too mad to think straight.

Candy

How dare you do this, to any of them?

The first heartbreak of Candy is Roxy/Calliope. John/Roxy is a sweet enough ship, but at what cost? They were so happy together, amd even John repeatedly points out in his internal monologue that it doesn't feel right to break them up. His conversation with Dave about sexuality and love is incredible, and up to chapter 14 the Roxy and Callir issue seemed to be the only sticking point in a much happier version

Then Dirk dies, and really? Really??? Fuck you. Fuck you for making me read that Dirk Strider would choose to end his own life when he realizes that he can no longer <i>control the minds of his friends and family</i>. That's fucked up in a million different directions. Fuck you.

Every songle thing Gamzee does makes me feel physically unclean. Is this supposed ti be a parody of poorly written fix-it fanfiction? A deconstruction of redemption arcs as a concept? It wasn't needed! Homestuck has redemption arcs already, Vriska and (Vriska) in particular bandied the idea around and deconstructed it fairly well, all of John's retcon powers were a fix-it fic, was ANY OF THIS BULLSHIT necessary??? It's a disgrace to the person Gamzee was before he went insane, and to everyone forced to read through his awful, awful dialogue.

Roxy was difficult to read in this epilogue, coming straight out of meat where Roxy was confident in himself and hid place in the world, then on to this Roxy who felt subtly wrong right up until her final conversation with John when we get her point of view on everything that's happened. Still mad about the Straight Married Babies Ever After, but Roxy at least is still #real, and I can respect her and her choices. (Except the ones involving Gamzee and funerals. I acknowledge that being weird about funerals is a known Roxy trait, but come on. Really??)

John feels like the point of view character again in Candy. He's the only one who seems to notice that something isn't quite right, his conversations with Terezi are incredible when they aren't slapping me in the face with the not-so-subtle wrongness of this universe, and his reconciliations with Roxy and Jake at the end are beautiful. I love that he at least tried to help little Tavros, no matter how it turned out, because he's a good fucking person!

Jake is a mixed bag. Am I happy with how he's treated in the first three quarters of the epilogue? Oh FUCK no. An I happy that he finally gets to be free by the end and be his own fucking person for once in his life? Absolutely. Give the boy some agency, and some GOD DAMN PANTS.

Jade honestly doesn't..... Do much? Either plot-wose or for me emotionally. She isn't in the epilogue much except as an obstacle for Davekat, which is really rude to everyone involved. I barely remember a time when I shipped DaveJade, and I don't think I ever shipped JadeKat, but after Meat I'd really hoped that that triad could work itself out. They had the potential to really be happy. Then it didn't, and she's never going to know why her husband didn't come back from investigating that strange building, unless she followed and found his corpse, dead for no apparent reason and not capable of being revived. I'm not sure which is worse. At least one of those has some kind of closure.

Karkat I actually really like in Candy. He stands up for himself, apparently finds love with Meenah, founds a moderately successful rebellion. Good For Him.

Dave is a clusterfuck of emotions, as always. Am I happy about his relationship with Jade? Not really, it seems by the end like he forced himself into it, thinking it was the right thing to do more than actually wanting it. Am I happy he got to meet and talk to Obama? Absolutely, though there is then the whole can of worms which is the canon Condy backstory. Not even touching that. After the speculation in Meat I'm thrilled to find out Obama did in fact god tier and escape the destruction of the universe. Dave is gay, he loves/loved Karkat, he's off to be the ~~Ultimate~~ version of himself and save the multiverse in the Meat postscript. Good For Him. (Also I can't be the only one who thinks Obama meant he and Dirk Fucked. Did that really happen? Did I dream that up??)

Rose and Kanaya were good too. Am I thrilled they found and raised Vriska 2.0? No. Am I happy they got to grow older together, immortal lesbian gods who are deeply in love? 10 million percent yes. Rose thanking John for the happy times with her family moved me. It didn't make it all worth it, but it helped soothe the burn this epilogue left on my soul.

Aside: I'm glad all the dead trolls are here? They're not double dead, this universe is somehow inside the black hole I guess (?), the generic dead (and Meenah and (Vriska)) get to do other shit too. Meenah/Karkat is sweet, Vriska got to kill Gamzee once and for all, I'm okay with that sequence of events.

Aradia and Sollux showing up made my day, I'm not gonna lie. They're great and hilarious. Alt!Callie's explanation of how a narrator's motives can shape a story helped me come to terms with Meat, as well as being just a fantastic bit of meta discussion.

That really just leaves Jane........

I'm not happy. Sweet baker girl is a tyrannical and genocidal despot?? No thanks. Abusive, xenophobic, asshole Jane, basically new Condy with a twist, is not something I'n gonna accept. The only time I sympathized with her at all was when her father died, and that was more for his sake than anything else. (Side note: where the fuck was he in Meat??)

In conclusion on Candy:

I don't know how anything could be as bad as Meat, but this is. Somehow. The light parts were lighter, but everything had a fundamental wrongness to it, and I couldn't be satisfied with any of it. At least Callie said none of it is canon, and she only stuck around to kill English once and for all and fix the narrative of Meat.

In Conclusion

Hussie, come out and fight me you COWARD.

#upd8 #hs #homestuck #epilogues #hs epilogues #homestuck epilogues #meat #candy #seriously though what the fuck #how do you read more on mobile

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lilparcheesie · 7 years

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I got ze tagged

Last: 1. Drink: water

2. Phone call: Jacob (my coworker) needed to find his phone

3. Text message: “Your face matches Natalie’s backpack” - @reallifeshitpost 4. Song you listened to: Lustration//Circa Survive before this or Buried a Lie//Senses Fail during this 5. Time you cried: A yesterday!! I saw sting rays (which are super cute) and was already having a really bad day, so I just cried because Nick putting them up on the board made me so happy I cried.

HAVE YOU:

6. Dated someone twice: Yes sadly

7. Kissed someone and regretted it: y e s lol its the worst 8. Been cheated on: :’) 9. Lost someone special: Too many and I’m scared of losing more.. 10. Been depressed: I don’t know… honestly, I workout so often that even if I was I would have no idea because I have so much dopamine in me that I’m always w i r e d. But if I was depressed, or had any mental illness, it would most likely be PTSD or anxiety. Probably from childhood abuse. 11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: Never, actually.

LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS:

12-14. Teal, Coral, Light Gray… I have so many though

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU:

15. Made new friends: Yes! So many!! I’m so lucky!!!

16. Fallen out of love: Honestly? No. I think I never really fall out of love. I just grow negative feelings that consume those lovelier ones. Ya know?

17. Laughed until you cried: Yes! So many times! For hours!

18. Found out someone was talking about you: Yeah, but I try to remember the times where people talk behind my back about loving me much. That’s all I care about

19. Met someone who changed you: Yes, she’s keeping me alive in my struggles. He’s making it possible for me to live comfortably. I’m lucky.

20. Found out who your friends are: I love friendship. A lot of people have negative connotations around friendships, and how fast they’ll leave or betray them. If I feel like I’m just waiting to get stabbed, abandoned, or offended, I’ll never really enjoy them. And even if I get hurt, it’s a learning process. I just like to keep people around who are enjoyable company. 21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: I kiss people, yeah. I love kisses. It’s one of my favorite parts of being with someone. They make me feel good. But, I don’t kiss anyone unless I am sure they have feelings for me and vice versa.

GENERAL:

22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: Like.. all of them? I didn’t add any onliners, heck?

23. Do you have any pets: Yeahh! Two dogs, a boxer named Sammy and a English Silky Terrior named Binky.

24. Do you want to change your name: Legally? sometimes. Sometimes I don’t. It’s confusing sometimes.

25. What did you do for your last Birthday: It was on Thanksgiving so it was forgotten by everyone I was with, but that’s okay. Thanksgiving is important here.

26. What time did you wake up: 6:42.

27. What were you doing at midnight last night: I think I was woken up to get somebody into their room.

28. Name something you can’t wait for: The sweet release of death Transferring schools 29. When was the last time you saw your mom: In person? Almost 7 weeks ago. In photo? My friend Mick was with her yesterday.

30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: That I had financial stability… Less of a crazy upbringing… Met some people earlier in my life. 31. Listening right now: Escape the Fate radio on Spotify. My students talking about robots (aka my class). 32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: Yeah! Thomas works with me. I’ve met others, but that is the most recent Thomas.

33. Something that is getting on your nerves: The fact that I am not getting better as much as I’d like and my body when it’s in pain and failing i honestly hate failing

34. Most visited website: uuuuh… www.tumblr.com??? uh… www.thepunchlineismachismo.com ???

35. Mole/s: I have none. I think it’s fine.

36. Mark/s: I have some stretch marks and scarring all over my body

37. Childhood dream: Theatre star, athlete, engineer, tinkerer… I had all the dreams

38. Hair color: Brunette/Auburn

39. Long or short hair: It’s medium length now! Used to be down past my butt but all that changed when the fire nation attacked and I cut my hair super short for rowing

40. Do you have a crush on someone: I do… it’s pretty bad. I’d like to give them my heart as an offering but they like.. basically have all rights to me and I want to do everthing in my power to make them happy

41. What do you like about yourself: My open mindedness or empathetic approach towards others. Lack of subtlety. My heart (my crush says I have resilience and I think that’s good)

42. Piercings: My ears

43. Blood type: Not really sure?

44. Nickname: Jughead, Toe, Tori, Sumner

45. Relationship status: I’m not sure but I’m only emotionally and physically invested in one person

46. Zodiac: Sagittarius, watch out bitches

47. Pronouns: She/Her

48. Favorite TV Show: Supernatural? Avatar TLAB? Too many.

49. Tattoos: Possibly sometimes

50. Right or left hand: left

51. Surgery: A bunch

52. Hair dyed in different color: Yeah

53. Sport: I played literally every sport growing up because my mom wanted me to lose weight and not be so useless

55. Dream Vacation: Somewhere with stingrays

56. Pair of trainers: Nikes atm. But I love converse

MORE GENERAL:

57. Eating: pussy & dick Vegetables are nice

58. Drinking: water but if I’m spoiling myself, tea or vanilla coke

59. I’m about to: Go to lunch and refresh

61. Waiting for: the day i feel satisfied with my efforts

62. Want: All my grades to be A+, financial stability, someone to take care of me, more music, fresh fruit and veggies, a nice bath using herbal soaps and lots of bubbles. For someone to love me for who I actually am, not just some concept they made up that left out all the bad things..

63. Get married: Probably. I mean. That’s the goal.

64. Career: I wanted to be an engineer but I’m thinking about focusing more on robotics or design careers… so… robotic things seem neat.. idk…

WHICH IS BETTER 65. Hugs or kisses: Kiss me all over, please

66. Lips or eyes: Eyes… or lips… i don’t know theyre all cute

67. Shorter or taller: Taller

68. Older or younger: Not too far from my age, older though(?)

70. Nice arms or nice stomach: Arms? I dunno I actually super appreciate cute arms.. but.. if a tummy is soft enough it might win me over.

71. Sensitive or loud: Definitely sensitive.. I don’t like loud things unless it’s music

72. Hook up or relationship: Relationships are always better because wow they’re so much fun

73. Troublemaker or hesitant: It’s hard to say?? Uh.. I mean I like the caution that comes with being hesitant but the daringness that comes with being a troublemaker? I’d probably stay on the safe side and be hesitant.

HAVE YOU EVER:

74. Kissed a Stranger: No

75. Drank hard liquor: No

76. Lost glasses/contact lenses: One time I had a contact rip in four while it was in my eye… I was so sad.

77. Turned someone down: Yes

78. Sex on the first date: Nah 79. Broken someone’s heart: Not intentionally…

80. Had your heart broken: Yeah…

81. Been arrested: Nope!

82. Cried when someone died: Not really. I get sad when I find out people die, but I internalize it a lot. It’s just a natural thing. Like.. all their love.. gone… and i feel it takes love away from me.

83. Fallen for a friend: A few. One recently.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

84. Yourself: Yes

85. Miracles: Somewhat

86. Love at first sight: Kinda

87. Santa Claus: Not anymore 88. Kiss on the first date: Sure if it goes well but I’m not going to rush things if it isn’t meant to be you know

OTHER: 90. Current best friend(s) name: Cait, Yoll, Nick, Joe (the PA), Natalie

91. Eye color: Hazel? Blue-Green? I don’t know.

92. Favorite movie: Big Fish (Tim Burton)

Tagging: anyone who wants to do this kinda thing really

#i hope everyone is doing well

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jayykesley · 7 years

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can I ask for all of the oc questions for both of my sons

absolutely you can;

1. what do they look like?

Derick’s about 5’9, with slightlytanned skin, golden blond curly hair, and blue eyes

Roswell is a tall, lanky, 17-yearold with ridiculous dark hair and big round grey eyes

2. describe their personality inthree words:

Derick: Nervous, shameful, and sweet

Roswell: Excited, enthusiastic,empathetic

3. how tall are they?

Derick’s 5’9, and Roswell’s about 5’11

4. favorite foods?

Derick loves anything sweet – cookies,brownies, cake, coffee with more sugar than actual coffee

Roswell will eat anything andeverything, he’s a growing kid

5. any allergies?

Not that I know of

6. what is their build?

When the gang first meets Derick,he’s real real skinny because he can’t afford to eat a lot. After they get himsome real food, he still somewhat skinny, but a little more filled out?

Roswell’s just lanky like a noodle

7. do they have curly, wavy, orstraight hair?

Derick’s got super curly hair thatsticks up everywhere and gets in his eyes

Roswell has straight hair that lookslike he stuck a fork in a socket

8. do they like books? if so, howoften do they read?

Derick doesn’t read a lot – not alot of good reading material in Cirsca, it’s mostly just manuals and journals.Roswell’s kind of the same way, he doesn’t mind them but reading’s not his ideaof fun.

9. what are their talents?

Derick’s not half bad at drawing,though he usually only draws Ragsy.

Roswell: Talking absolutely non-stop

10. two or more other fictionalcharacters they’re similar to?

Shoshanna from Inglorious Basterdswas the inspiration for Derick, though I guess the two aren’t wildly similar interms of personality. Maybe Cress from Lunar Chronicles? Or Noah from RavenCycle? I’m actually not sure…

For Roswell, definitely Dick Graysonfrom the Lego Batman Movie

11. what is one strange hobby/talentthey have?

Derick’s freaky good atcommunicating with animals. Like, “Disney Princess” good.

I actually don’t know one forRoswell…and here I thought I knew my ocs….

12. five songs that fit them:

For Derick, here’s three:

“The Letter That Never Came” –Thomas Newman (yeah its instrumental, but its just so sad at the beginning thatI think of Derick every time)

“Beauty and the Beast” – BATB OTS(the original with angela Lansbury – technically derick/Rosalyn but still)

“I Went TooFar” – Aurora

I swear I have more, I just can’tthink of them atm

And Shut Up and Dance definitelyreminds me of Roswell

13. who do you think could play themin a live-action rendition?

Evan Peters, who is also myface-claim for Derick.

A young Nicholas Hoult is my faceclaim for Roswell too..

14. do they just want to rest?

YES oh my gosh yes that’s all Derickwants. Roswell’s the opposite; there’s too much to do!!

15. which OC did not sign up forthis?

Derick, for sure

16. who’s their favorite person?

It takes him a while to warm up toher, but overall I think Rosalyn is his favorite person. He also really enjoyshanging out with Carson and Lorelei, because they’re like the siblings he neverhad.

Funny enough, Rosalyn is alsoRoswell’s favorite person, right next to Dr. Anaya Gatling! Gatling’s like amentor to him, so he loves her so much too.

17. who do you ship them with?

ROSALYN with Derick, and Roswell’sperfectly fine on his own

18. have they experienced the deathof a loved one?

Derick hasn’t, Roswell has (he and Rosalynused to have an older brother)

19. have they ever been tortured?

For Derick, doesmental/emotional/physical abuse count? For Roswell, no, not yet (?)

20. what’s the worst thing you’vedone to them without spoiling anything?

Gave Derick to parents who mentallyand emotionally abused him then abandoned him, so now he genuinely doesn’trecognize real love when he’s shown it.

For Roswell, killing his big brotherreally sucks so…

21. any mental illnesses?

Derick probably does, but he hasn’tbeen diagnosed. Roswell’s mental health is great, so no.

22. what’s their favorite animal?

Derick’s is cats, Roswell’s is dogs.

23. what are their flaws?

Derick’s kind of a coward, veryabsorbed in his own mind, overthinks everything.

Roswell can be too trusting and tooeager to see the best in everyone. Also could accidentally share secret infowhile rambling.

24. what’s their favorite color?

Derick likes green, and Roswelllikes purple and yellow and blue and red and….

25. pet peeves?

Derick dislikes people who just gogo go!Roswell dislikes grumpy, pessimistic people.

26. bad habits?

Derick’s always chewing on his nailswhen he’s nervous. Roswell’s is obviously his oversharing.

27. an OC they hate:

Derick hates Rosalyn when he firstmeets her, Carson kinda too.

Roswell really only hates Chief Knoxfor killing his brother.

28. random fact about them:

Afternoons at Marni’s shop are someof the only happy childhood memories Derick has.

It’s safe to assume that, at anygiven moment, Roswell’s wearing at least one brightly colored bandage for anynumber of minor injuries

29. family members?

Derick just had a mother and afather, nobody else.

Roswell only has Rosalyn now, but heconsiders the rest of the unground dwellers his family.

30. Hogwarts house?

Hufflepuff and Gryffindor (?)

31. what makes them happy?

Derick: Ragsy, coolmornings/evenings in the Burjeok forest, watching the stars and moon at night

Roswell: Lots of things! Warmsunshine, new flowers in spring, talking to anybody, going to town, pettinganimals, etc.

32. middle and last names (ifthey’re established)?

No middle names, Denmeyer is Derick’slast name and Tate is Roswell’s.

33. introvert, ambivert, orextrovert?

Derick’s heavily introverted andRoswell��s heavily extroverted

34. how old are they?

Derick’s 22 and Roswell’s 17 (he’sthe dancing queen)

35. strange quirks they have:

Does Derick’s nail-chewing count?

36. any unhealthy obsessions?

Why did mom and dad leave, why wasn’t I enough?

For Roswell, nothing really. He’spretty healthy overall

37. looks like they could kill butis actually a cinnamon roll, looks like a cinnamon roll but could actually killyou, looks like a cinnamon roll and is actually a cinnamon roll, looks likethey could kill you and could actually kill you, or sinnamon roll

Both are totally pure cinnamon rolls

38. how smart are they?

Derick’s actually fairly smart. He’sgot a lot of practical knowledge from several years on his own.

Roswell’s fairly smart. He’s still ateen, so he’s got a lot to learn, but he’s intelligent!

39. master planner or masterimproviser?

Improviser, and about half-and-half

40. species/race?

Both human, both white

41. cat or dog person?

Derick loves both with all his heart

Roswell prefers dogs because they’remore open and obvious with their love and affection

42. where are they from?

Both are from Cirsca!

43. moral alignment?

Derick’s Lawful neutral, and Roswell’sNeutral Good

44. what is their dominant hand?

Both are right-handed

45. do you have headcanons for them?

Plenty

46. can they sing?

Derick’s not terrible, but he wouldnever draw that much attention to himself. Roswell probably shouldn’t

47. what horror-movie characterstereotype are they?

Derick would be the one that refusesto investigate the creepy noises, gets left in the living room by himself,probably winds up dying then.

Roswell is one of the first to die,he was probably the one that went to check out the creepy noises

48. how well can they worktechnology?

Derick’s better than most of thegang, since he worked in the capital city. Roswell doesn’t have a lot ofexperience with technology, so he probably wouldn’t be very good

49. which Marvel or DCsuperhero/villain would they be?

Both would actually fit CharlesXavier pretty well. Just with his whole “I don’t want to fight, I just want tobe accepted” thing?

50. how well do they develop overthe course of the story?

I want to say pretty well? I’mhoping to have Derick go from “coward who would rather stay home thanpotentially help others and stand up for his beliefs” to “scared guy who bravely facesdanger anyways for the sake of his friends and what’s right”

Roswell gets his own development,but you know, spoilers.

51. are they more humble or moreegotistical?

Humble, definitely

52. who would they be in a Disneymovie?

Derick would be snow White, justhappily traipsing through the woods with a flock of animals

Roswell would be the comedic sidekickor loyal animal companion

53. how many languages can theyspeak?

Just english

54. early-bird or night-owl?

Derick’s a night owl, and Roswell isboth since he never sleeps

55. how meme-y are they?

Derick would probably know more memesthan he’d like, because Carson and Lorelei would share them all with him.Roswell would be one of the meme-iest

56. how close are they to theirfamily?

Biological family? Derick’s not atall close, and Roswell is very close to Rosalyn.

57. do they have suicidal thoughtsor actions?

Derick kinda does but not like another oc of mine andRoswell doesn’t – he’s doing well

58. what is their preferred weapon?

Both can work a gun, but neitherlikes to fight (except I think I’m gonna give Derick a shield instead)

Thanks!!

#my ocs

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jackietracks · 7 years

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so I was actually tagged for like the first time ever I think?? thank you @kerokerobitch you’ve made my day.

1: Are you named after someone?

Well not my first name... My middle name, Diane, was my grandmothers name on my mums side. She died before I was born so I never got to meet her but she sounds like she was a wonderful person.

2: When was the last time you cried?

This probably sounds stupid but I kind of cry all the fucking time planning out stories. I like to plan out lots of emotional scenes and just kind of end up crying over them a whole bunch. I know I’ve cried this week bc of that. Hell I might have even done it last night.

3: Do you like your handwriting?

It can be pretty sloppy but if I take my time and actually put in like the smallest amount of effort its really clean and I swear it practically feels like a font and I like it a whole lot when its like that.

4: What is your favorite lunch meat?

Dude I ain’t gonna like to you here. None. It’s really never worth asking me about favourite foods because the answer will pretty much just be none.

5: Do you have kids?

No. I’m quite sure I’ll never want kids either which really pisses my mum off.

6: If you were another person, would you be friends with you?

I’m not sure? That’s a really weird question. I mean I’m apparently quite easy to get along with? So I guess I’d at least be able to tolerate me?

7: Do you use sarcasm?

I can’t have a conversation with a friend without being at least a little sarcastic. I’m glad my friends give as good as they get so we can just go back and forth being horrible, sarcastic assholes to eachother for eternity.

8: Do you still have your tonsils?

Yeah. The most work I’ve had done on my mouth has been a few fillings over the years. Never had need to have my tonsils out.

9: Would you bungee jump?

lol fuck no.

10: What is your favorite kind of cereal?

Ok, this is a food one that I can actually answer. I don’t really eat cereal any more but fucking Kellogg's crunchy nut clusters clusters with chocolate are a gift from god himself.

11: Do you untie your shoes when you take them off?

No. I just kick those bastards across the room and forget about ‘em. I toss those fuckers off

12: Do you think you’re a strong person?

My physical strength is... weird. Like I feel like I can lift a decent amount of weight without too much issue yet I can’t open a bottle of lucozade? Actually... it really is always lucozade huh? Other drinks are like a 50/50 chance but lucozade, my absolute fucking addiction, I can never ever open by myself unless I use my fucking teeth... weird.

Mentally and emotionally I don’t really know, I don’t recall a lot of my previous thoughts and feelings very well. I can sort of recall highly positive feelings sometimes but anything else is like a swirling void of “these things sure happened huh?”. If I were currently going through a severely distressing situation I’d probably be able to tell you if I felt like I was coping well but right now there’s no distress and I’m in a state of ‘pretty chill’ so sorry fam, idk.

13: What is your favourite ice cream? Ever, ever?

Ok ok, this is another food one I can answer easy. Ben and Jerry’s phish food. I fucking love it. Every time I go to the cinema, they have this fucking stand where the sell fucking Ben and Jerry’s ice cream, I always have that with either chocolate fudge brownie or cookie dough.

14: What is the first thing you notice about people?

I really couldn’t tell you. That’s another thing I can never recall is what I notice first about people. I’ll try and take note of what it is I notice next time I meet someone new.

15: What is the least favorite physical thing you like about yourself?

I’m still sort of getting over the whole “I’m fat and ugly” thing I was going through for years but the only thing I can really think of is that my hair is really fucking flat? Like, there is no volume to it at all? It really bugs me then when people are like “Oh your hair looks so nice straightened!” because I feel like that’s when its at its worst. I love it when the hairdresser curls it though so I guess its and easy fix?

16: What color pants and shoes are you wearing now?

No shoes and these cute ass Bambi pj bottoms

17: What are you listening to right now?

Arctic Monkeys - Arabella honestly I fucking love it so much!

18: If you were a crayon, what color would you be?

Uhhh? Well purple is my favourite colour so I guess I’d want to be some kind of blueish purple?

19: Favorite smell?

Shit man I am a sucker for lavender. Like every time I go to Lush I have to get something lavender. I remember the first time I ordered from their website literally everything I ordered was lavender scented and my dad went to get the package for me and when he got back the smell of lavender was fucking painfully strong. it was fucking absurd.

20: Who was the last person you spoke to on the phone?

I don’t use the phone much, it makes me really uncomfy for whatever reason, but it was probably my grandfather... Yeah, I remember now, he asked me if I had fun when I went to London for Shelter.

21: Favorite sport to watch?

I’m not to keen on sports but roller derby fucking owns.

22: Hair color?

I’m naturally blonde, but like a darkish, dirty blonde, but I got my hair dip dyed purple again on Wednesday and it looks so fucking good!

23: Eye color?

They’re like a kinda hazel green.

24: Do you wear contacts?

No.

25: Favorite food to eat?

I really don’t do a whole lot of eating atm and I don’t like a whole lot of foods but I will chow down on McDonald’s fries for the rest of my life if you let me.

26: Scary movies or comedy?

I don’t really know... I love horror but most scary movies seem to use cheap tactics or just generally be really dumb but I can’t say I’m fond of like pure comedy movies, if its like a comedic action movie then hell yeah. How about just fuck both of those and give me an action movie instead? Or some animated kids movie? That’d be better.

27: Last movie you watched?

I think it was Captain America: Civil War. Spider-man in that movie is a fucking blessing. And Ant-man.

28: What color of shirt are you wearing?

White fucking Bambi pj top to match the bottoms.

29: Summer or winter?

I’d say summer. Its warm and its like the designated relaxation season.

30: Hugs or kisses?

Yes.

31: What book are you currently reading?

I’m like a quarter of the way through Outcast, book 3 in the Power Of Three arc of Warriors. I actually haven’t picked it up in a while. I might get on that later.

32: Who do you miss right now?

Nobody.

33: What is on your mouse pad?

I’m using a fucking laptop.

34: What is the last TV program you watched?

I think it was 8/10 Cats Does Countdown which is fucking excellent by the way.

35: What is the best sound?

You ever turned on a PS1?

36: Rolling stones or The Beatles

No?

37: What is the furthest you have ever traveled?

Spain I do believe.

38: Do you have a special talent?

I say I can draw but I really can’t atm...

I feel like I don’t talk to anyone enough on here for me to tag them without feeling weird about it so I’ll just tag @aclockworkqueer and @theplumps because I know you both in person so it feels less weird to me so if either of you wanna do this then cool but if you don’t that’s cool too.

#really tho thank you nova seeing this notification made me so happy like you have no idea

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