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lucy90712 · 5 months

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omgg girl YOU HAVE TO DO this enemies to lovers fic with pedri where they're lowkey known to hate eachother in school but then one day the reader comes out of the classroom and and has blood on her face and is crying becasue this one dude messed with her and hit her and pedri sees her and is furious and asks her "who did this to you" and the reader refuses to tell him but then eventually gives in because of how mad he is and pedri beats the dude up like really bad, then the reader and pedri are at the nurses office and she asks him why he did that and pedri finally confesses his feelings for her and so does she and they like kiss in the end ?

you're writing style would slayy this prompt soo muchh so pleasee do write itt!, anyways take care of yourself!!, love youu

A/n: I changed up the idea a bit but I really like it so I hope you do too

WC: 2.2k After going the whole year waiting and celebrating all my friends birthdays it's finally my turn as it was my birthday during the week so now my friends are hosting a party for me at one of their places. All week I've been looking forward to this party as I haven't been out in a while because I've had other things to focus on with school and work. I went out and brought a new dress for tonight and everything because I want to look and feel amazing. I'm always the friend that just wearing casual clothes as I'm always too busy to get dressed up but not tonight I'm going to be the one getting all the stares and attention tonight. Usually I would say I don't care about getting attention from guys but tonight I want to prove someone wrong.

Pedri. That asshole football player. I met Pedri when I first moved to Barcelona as he was friends with the friends I made and ever since he's been around. He's like a fly that just won't leave you alone every time I think he's not going to show up he sneaks up on me and my night is ruined. I know for a fact that he will be there tonight because he's part of the friend group and everyone else is always trying to get up to get along but we just don't. For whatever reason Pedri took an instant dislike to me, to begin with I thought he was attractive but any feelings for him other than disgust quickly went away. He's always calling me names or just generally saying awful things to me but to everyone else he's an angel and the sweetest guy ever. The last time I saw him I had gone straight from an 8 hours shift with 4 hours of classes before and I heard him say to someone else that I never look good which is exactly why I want to prove him wrong tonight.

This morning I took myself to get my nails done and I got my hair cut for the first time in a while and now I've just got out the shower after having washed my hair and shaved. I feel like a whole new person and it feels amazing I don't know why I didn't make more of an effort sooner. The first thing I did was put my dress on then I did my hair and makeup which took a while as I wanted everything to be perfect but eventually I did it and everything couldn't look better. Looking in the mirror I almost didn't recognise myself but I lied the version of me I saw much more than the usual tired mess I usually see. My friends were all going crazy over the picture I sent in our group chat which gave me the boost in confidence I needed to go along with my new look.

Seeing as I plan to drink tonight I got a cab to my friends place where their party was happening. I purposely arrived a bit late because I want to make an entrance seeing as it's my birthday party and I put all this effort into my appearance I want everyone to notice well I want Pedri to notice. The door was unlocked so I just opened it and walked right in straight away everyone turned to look at me it felt like I was in a movie and for once I was the main character not a background actor. All of my friends immediately made their way over to shower me in compliments but all I was interested in was Pedri. It took me a second but I eventually I caught his gaze and I could see his pupils were dilated and his jaw was slightly open but as soon as he noticed I was looking he turned away. My mission for tonight is already complete now it's time to have fun and channel my hatred for Pedri into the best night of my life so far.

My best friend got me a drink and then took me off to go and dance with her. She made a playlist of all my favourite songs which she put on and we started dancing together. As we were dancing I had another drink or maybe two so I was definitely on a high but I wasn't drunk nowhere close to it. Somehow I lost my friend and ended up just dancing on my own which was fine until I guy I hadn't met before came over to talk to me. At first he was nice but then he got overly flirty and I just wasn't feeling it, I didn't come here to go home with a guy I just wanted to have fun and let loose.

Despite my best attempts the guy would not leave me alone and he was really starting to test my patience. His hands were all over my body which made me really uncomfortable but every time I tried moving them his hands went back to where they were if not lower. Once he started squeezing my ass that was enough for me I pulled away but the guy grabbed my arm and held it really tightly. I could tell it was going to leave a bruise but that's was the last of my worries all of a sudden all I could feel was intense panic flowing through my veins I felt as though I hadn't had a drop of alcohol I was so aware of every little touch on my skin. I've never been so scared in my life I've never felt this weak either, usually I'd stand up for myself without any hesitation but right now I can't get any words out and I can't make my body move even an inch. My whole being is now controlled but the fear of what this guy is going to do to me.

"You know you look super sexy in this dress" the guy whispered in my ear as he put a hand around my throat

"G-get off m-me" I managed to choke out

"What you don't want me even though you are practically begging for attention dressed like that" the guy taunted

That was enough for me I managed to free myself from his hold but I wasn't able to move quick enough to avoid him slapping me for presumably not wanting to sleep with him. I flinched at the pain but I also braced myself for more but it never happened. Suddenly there was someone else stood in front of me who punched the other guy just as I looked up. Everything happened so quickly but time seemed to slow down as I watched the guy that has been harassing me get punched in the face multiple times, even though it wasn't me doing it I felt great knowing someone had my back.

Once time went back to normal speed and the guy was finally escorted out of the house I finally got to see who had come in to protect me. That someone who I was thanking in my mind just a few seconds ago was Pedri. For once I saw a different look in his eyes instead of disgust and hatred I saw concern and worry. He cared although he has never acted like it he cares about me. That thought sent butterflies through my stomach, for some reason owning that deep down Pedri didn't really hate me made me feel relieved happy even.

There was a lot of thoughts swirling around in my mind not just about what happened but also about my feelings for Pedri. I was soon brought out off of my spiral though when I noticed Pedri turn towards me and reach his hand out to touch mine which sent a shiver down my spine. I could move as he looked at my wrist which was already starting to bruise and then studied my face which suddenly made me aware of the fact that I could feel something running down my face.

"Are you ok?" He asked

"Yeah I'm fine" I replied

"We both know that's a lie now come with me I'll clean you up" he said

He offered me his hand so I took it and he lead me through all of the people around who had just gone back to doing whatever they were doing before after watching what unfolded just a few minutes ago. Pedri lead me to the bathroom upstairs which was empty luckily so we went straight in and he locked the door behind us which made me a little nervous all of a sudden. As Pedri looked for the first aid kit I just stood there watching him as I was starting to realise that maybe my attraction towards Pedri hadn't disappeared and had just been buried deep down inside me instead as I was starting to feel the nerves I felt when I first met him again.

After a while of just staring at him Pedri finally found what he was looking for and turned back to me. He told me to sit on the counter in front of him so I made my way over ready to haul myself up on the surface but instead Pedri put his hands on my waist and lifted me into the counter. Having his hands on my waist felt weirdly comfortable it was as if this had happened a million times before I felt safe almost with his hands on me. He kept one hand on my waist as he gently cleaned up the cut I had on my lip which stung but every time I winced Pedri just squeezed my waist and apologised which somehow made it all better. As he worked to put cream on my lip and wrist I was completely captivated but the way he was sticking his tongue out fully concentrated on making sure he did everything he could to make me better.

This was the first time I noticed how perfect his face was. His hair, his eyes, his lips and his stubble that was beginning to form were all just so perfect. His hair looked so soft and fluffy. His eyes looked so caring and kind. His lips looked so kissable. Those thoughts had never crossed my mind before but thats simply because I wouldn't let them, I've always been attracted to Pedri but I didn't allow myself to feel these feelings as until today I thought he simply just hated me but this situation has made it clear that he doesn't hate me quite as much as I first thought.

"There we go, does that feel any better?" He asked

"It feels a lot better thank you" I replied

"Now tell me how are you actually feeling and please be honest" he said

"I'm ok still a bit shaken up but I'll be ok" I said

"I'm sorry this happened to you that guy was wrong to do that don't think for a second you deserved it because you don't no matter how beautiful you look" Pedri said which took my by surprise as I never expected him to call me beautiful

"Thank you it means a lot hearing you say that" I said

"I have to ask why did you help me I thought you hated me" I said

Pedri just stood there for a few seconds which made me regret actually asking him and not just thinking about the many possible answers. All of my anxieties quickly disappeared though when Pedri closed the gap between us and attached his lips to mine. The feeling of having his lips on mine was out of this world I don't know how to even describe it it almost felt like a void was filled that I didn't know was empty before. Where my lip is cut it definitely stung kissing Pedri but it was so worth it and I'd deal with much more pain if it meant I could kiss him again. Sadly the kiss eventually came to an end but Pedri stayed close to me and wrapped his arms around me even after he'd pulled away.

"I'm sorry I should've asked you first before doing that but I just couldn't resist" he said

"It's ok I enjoyed it but you didn't answer my question" I teased

"I never hated you I hated the fact that I found you so beautiful I told myself that I needed to focus on football and not dating so when we first met I thought it would be easier if I just acted like I hated you but it really didn't help and I just can't pretend anymore" he admitted

"Well I'm glad you don't hate me as that would've made this all very awkward" I laughed

"I know I've been awful to you but can we start over?" He asked

"Of course all is forgiven especially after you helped me out there" I said

"How about we get out of here and maybe we can talk over some ice cream" he suggested

"I like the sound of that" I replied

With that Pedri gave me another kiss which he apologised for as he realised it probably hurt me which it did but I happily kissed him again as he grabbed my hand to lead me outside to his car. I felt a bit bad for leaving my own birthday party but at the same time getting to know Pedri and exploring these newfound feelings sounds a lot more fun.

#pedri imagine #pedri #pedri x reader #pedri imagines #football imagine

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aspoonofsugar · 8 months

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Oshi No Ko - A Family Of Stars

I caught up with Oshi No Ko, so here are some opinions and meta thoughts.

AN INVERSION OF NAOKI URASAWA'S MONSTER

Oshi No Ko and Monster are 2 very different stories, but some plot elements and conflicts are similar:

Monster is the story of a surgeon, who must track down a serial killer whose life he has saved. This monster is one of 2 twins and the story deals with the brother and sister uncovering their past

Oshi No Ko is the story of a doctor, who is murdered and reborn as his favourite idol's child. Together with him there is a twin sister and they must track down the killer of their mother. The series leads the twins to find closure with their previous selves, so they can embrace a new life

In short, in both series there is a pair of twins and a murderer. It is just that in Monster the twins have no memories nor sense of selves, while in Oshi No Ko they have too many memories and baggage.

Finally, in Monster the characters must uncover the truth behind Johan, while in Oshi No Ko they must find out who Ai really is. The former is about understanding a monster, whereas the latter is about empathizing with a goddess.

(A)IDOL

The invincible smile that tears up the media Wanna know her secret, so mysterious Even the things she lacks end up in her area Such a perfect liar, you are: [Miss] ingenious, godly idol (You're my savior, you're my saving grace)

In religion an idol is:

An object which represents a deity, so it can become a manifestation of the god itself

A fake god, at least in monotheistic religions, like Judaism, Christianity and Islam

So, idols are gods. And yet, they are fake gods. In particular, monotheistic religions refuse idols because they are over-simplified representations of the divine.

Similarly, people worship celebrities, but only aknowledge their simplistic personas. Actors and idols are put on a pedestal, but also objectified:

So, what'd you eat today? What's your favorite book? And if you wanna go to play, where are you gonna go? I haven't eaten at all That's a secret No matter what you ask She's elusive, evasive Yet still shining bright; Her secret: out of sight, as if visible, has the taste of honey

They aren't seen as people with complex emotions, but as blank slates fans project their feelings onto.

This is why Ai Hoshino is the ultimate idol:

Drawing everyone's eyes You are the perfect, ultimate idol Never to appear again A reincarnation of Venus With that smile, with that "I love you" You captivate everyone Even if those eyes, those words, are false They make up a perfect love (Ai)

Ai's whole self is a lie. Not because she is malicious, but rather because she lacks a sense of self:

She is not sure of her own emotions and can't tell truth from lies. Everything is mixed and unclear. What does it even mean to love? What does Ai even want?

Ai is supposed to embody love. After all, she is associated to the Morning Star, which is called Venus, also known as the Goddess of Love. And yet, Ai's true eyes are dark:

Similarly, the word "ai" means love, but our idol's name is written with no kanji, which makes it the Japanese transcription of the English word for eye.

Ai's name is the sound of love, but with no kanjis (no meaning) attached. Ai is an empty love with empty eyes. This is the pun she is built on.

Still, why is that so? Well, Ai's parents don't put kanjis in her name, just like they don't love her:

So, Ai's character is defined by these 2 ideas:

I have never been loved by anyone Nor have I loved anyone else

On the one hand she was never loved. On the other hand she has never loved. Because of this, she thinks of herself as a fake.

AI (PURPLE) = AQUA (BLUE) + RUBY (RED)

Ai has stars in both her purple eyes. Aqua and Ruby instead have only 1 star each. Moreover, Aqua has blue eyes, while Ruby has red eyes. The idea is very simple. They are Ai's 2 sides:

Aqua is blue, right, mind and an actor

Ruby is red, left, heart and an idol

Together they make Ai, down to her 2 parallel careers (as an actress and as an idol). That said, the twins' foiling with their mother gets deeper:

As Miyako highlights, both Aqua and Ruby are liars. It is just that they lie about opposite things. On the one hand Aqua hides his most positive and vulnerable side. On the other hand Ruby hides her negative feelings. Aqua always sulks, while Ruby always smiles.

Aqua suppresses his wish to love others and to be happy with them

Ruby suppresses her fear to be unloved and abandoned by those around her

In short, each twin explores one of Ai's complexes (to love and to be loved). They really are the 2 faces of Ai (love).

AQUA - THE UNLOVING ACTOR

Aqua's story starts with Gorou Amamiya:

Gorou is a person strongly defined by guilt, which is at the root of his backstory. His mother was a young girl, who died by giving birth to him. As a result, Gorou feels he lives at her expenses and does all he can to rectify this mistake. For example, he becomes an obstetrician, even if he really wants to be a surgeon. Not only that, but he ends up developing a saviour complex. He feels it is his failure that Sarina dies, even if her illness can't be cured and has nothing to do with Gorou's area of expertise.

So, it is really no surprise that once Ai arrives, he projects on her the 2 people he could not save:

Ai is Sarina's favourite idol and a young girl like her

Ai is a teenage mother and is desperate to give birth in secret, just like Gorou's own mother

Ai represents Gorou's chance of redemption and catharsis. He could not save neither his mom nor Sarina, but he can help Ai. She needs the kind of doctor he is and this time he can make things right. However, Gorou is negated this closure and gets killed and reborn as Ai's own son. A son, who is destined to witness his mother's death. This time again, Aqua is powerless and can't save Ai. So, the story repeats and Aqua is left broken:

Aqua's real wish is to save people, but he keeps failing, so he chooses the path of revenge. He becomes his own antithesis.

He feels he doesn't deserve to live happily with others, but his wish to connect is too strong and he ends up forging some of the deepest bonds in the series:

He insists he is only focused on revenge, but ends up warming up to Kana and Akane to the point he goes out of his way to support them multiple times. Even when it doesn't help his avenge quest.

This is made clear in recent chapters, as well. Aqua has decided to give up on all his bonds. He cuts ties with Akane, decides to manipulate Kana and betrays Ruby's trust. He insists he is ready to go to hell alone. And yet, even after he takes such a dark turn, he can't help, but to save Ruby:

As Crow Girl says, this is a bad move on Aqua's side. His revenge would be easier if Ruby hated him, but he lets his true feelings out. He tries to repress his love and care for others. And yet, it keeps manifesting through the cracks of his vengeful persona. Aqua decides not to love, but he still does.

RUBY - THE UNLOVED IDOL

Ruby's story starts with Sarina Tendouji:

Sarina's life is doomed by her illness, which results in her parents abandoning her. Not only does she suffer physically, but she feels unloved. Despite that, she refuses to give up and laces on 2 people, who become her personal lights (stars):

Ai is the girl Sarina wishes to be. A person who is showered with love, as she shines brightly and moves freely on a stage.

Gorou is a parental substitude, as he is the only adult, who supports Sarina throughout her illness. He is even the person who stays with her, while she dies.

So, Ai and Gorou are around when Sarina's parents aren't, which is why she ends up idolizing them. Ai becomes some kind of ideal self, while Gorou becomes her first crush. The truth, though, is that they are the 2 pillars of Sarina's life.

Ironically, Sarina's make believe family becomes Ruby's real one. In particular, Ai becomes a mother, who loves her children with all her heart. This is healing for Ruby, who projects her wish for love on Ai:

It is Ai's strong emotions, which make it possible for Ruby to recover from the loss of her mother:

Ruby pursues the career of idol earnestly to become a star who never lies. And yet, she keeps lying to herself, as she refuses to confront Sarina's past. This negation is why her reaction to Gorou's death is so strong. This discovery becomes a catalyst for all of Ruby's negative feelings:

Ruby becomes her own antithesis and starts to climb up high through manipulation and lies. It is implied she weakens her relationships and later on she enters a violent fight with Aqua, which breaks their bond.

And yet, when Ruby hits rock bottom and confronts the painful truth that her parents have abandoned Sarina, it is Aqua who comes to her rescue:

Even if Ruby breaks their relationship and is prepared to live without trusting anyone anymore, she is still loved. The girl who fears rejection and abandonement is loved even in her darkest moment.

IDOL + FANS = MOTHER + CHILDREN

Aqua and Ruby are opposites. Aqua is scared to be loved and can't let go of Gorou. Ruby is scared to be unloved and can't face Sarina. And yet, they are also the same. Both project their deeper issues on both each other and Ai.

Gorou's feelings over his mother are projected on Sarina. Similarly, he projects his feelings for Sarina on Ai

Sarina's feelings over her mother are projected on Gorou. Later on, she decides to become like Ai because of her promise to Gorou

In short, Gorou wants to protect Ai because of Sarina and Sarina wants to become like Ai because of Gorou. As a result, Ai ends up as the object of their fantasies and wishes. A real godly idol.

Obviously, Gorou and Sarina's feelings towards Ai grow deeper and more complex as they are reborn as her twins. Slowly, their relationship goes from that of idol and fans to that of mother and children.

So, Aqua and Ruby's story is about overcoming the idealization of Ai. Both as fans towards their favourite idol and as children towards their mother. After all, isn't a mother their child's idol?

SUSANOO, AMATERASU AND MARIA

Among other things, the theme of idolisation is conveyed through the religious motif of the Hoshino Family.

Even the flowing sweats are beautiful Aqua These eyelids that hid the Ruby within

The lyrics reference the legend of Susanoo and Amaterasu:

According to tradition, the 3 god siblings Susanoo, Tsukuyomi and Amterasu are born from the creator god Izanagi. as he washes his face in a river. Tsukuyomi (Moon Goddess) is born from Izanagi's right eye, Amaterasu (Sun Goddess) from his left eye and Susanoo (Sea God) from his nose. In short:

Aqua is a composite version of Tsukuyomi and Susanoo. He has inherited Ai's right eye, like Tsukuyomi. However, the opening associates him to his mother's sweat, like Susanoo is born from Izanagi blowing his nose. Finally, his name links him to the sea

Ruby alludes to Amaterasu. She has inherited Ai's left eye, the opening links her to her mother's eyes and she herself mentions the goddess

This reference loosely comments Aqua and especially Ruby's arcs.

Amaterasu and Susanoo enter a fight, which leaves the Goddess crying and depressed. She hides in a cave and without the light of the sun, the world is left in darkness. The other Gods come up with a plan to lure Amaterasu out of her prison. In particular, the God of Enterteinment Ame-no-Uzume organizes a celebration for a new bright Goddess. Amaterasu gets curious and eventually comes out from the cave, so the world gets sunlight back.

Does any of this sound familiar?

Ame-no-Uzume is mentioned multiple times together with Amaterasu. Moreover, the characters visit the Goddess of Enterteinment's temple and they metaphorically enter Amaterasu's cave:

What the story does is clear, right? Ruby's arc is loosely an inversion of Amaterasu's story.

The Sun Goddess enters a fight with her brother and hides in a cave, only to be rescued by the Goddess of Enterteinment. Ruby is guided by Crow Girl (who could be a composite character between Yagatarasu and Ame-no-Uzume herself) and enters a cave, where she finds Gorou's body. This leads to Ruby going through her eclipse phase, where her eyes go dark. Eventually, she is helped by her brother and she finds her inner light again.

It is possible that Aqua's story will mirror Susanoo's in a similar way. After all, the God of the Sea is famous for killing a monstrous serpent to protect a Princess and for finding a Magical Sword within the beast. This may reference Aqua's quest for revenge, who leads him to find a princess (Akane-Princess Saya) and a blade (Kana-Tsurugi). That said, it is too soon to say.

As a final note, Ruby and Aqua's fight ties into the mythological motif. After all, Amaterasu enters into conflicts with both Susanoo and Tsukuyomi. In Amaterasu and Susanoo's case, they go through a divination ritual, so that Susanoo can prove his good intentions. Susanoo passes the trial, but the aftermath leads to the siblings fighting. When it comes to Ruby and Aqua, Ruby gets angry at Aqua for betraying Ai. As a result, Aqua has to mend his bond with Ruby by revealing his past self. To do so, he proves his identity through the Ai-keychan (a divine sign). He passes the trial.

What's most interesting about these references is Ame-no-Uzume's role. The Goddess of Enterteinment is an ally of Amaterasu, but Crow Girl leads the characters towards darkness. Thematically, she may embody the darkest part of the enterteinment world, which finds fun in people suffering.

So, what about Ai? What is her religious symbolism? Let's turn to Christianity:

Sing, dance, flutter, I am Maria — Right, lying is the most exquisite form of love

Mary is famous for having Jesus, while still a virgin. She is so perfect that God chooses her to bear his child. Similarly, Ai is an idol and is requested to be pure, so for her to have a sexual partner is out of question.

Still, Aqua and Ruby's reaction to the idea of a father is interesting. It speaks of their idealization of Ai both as her children and as her 2 biggest fans. At the same time, it betrays a wish to repress everything related to the final member of the Hoshino family.

MEPHISTO

As @hamliet explains in her meta, Hikaru Kamiki's name means God of Light, which is a reference to Lucifer, the fallen angel turned king of hell. It is a fitting imagery for Ai's enemy. Ai is Aqua and Ruby's goddess, so her killer can only be the devil. Similarly, Lucifer betrays God and Hikaru betrays Ai.

So, what is known about Hikaru Kamiki? Only 2 things:

He was raped and forced to have a son when he was 11

He is a serial killer, who targets famous celebrities

In particular, it is probable Hikaru idolises Ai, just like his children do. As a child, he is raped by a woman, then he meets Ai and has a relationship with her. However, his unsolved trauma almost surely ends up compromising his story with the idol and he eventually kills her. Later on, he projects his feelings over Ai on women similar to her, whom he targets in a neverending cycle.

This psychological mechanism makes him the embodyment of the most twisted love possible:

He was loved wrong (he was raped)

He loves wrong (he kills women he is attracted to)

Given this premise, he is clearly going to be defeated and he will probably die in the end. Still, the way he goes down will be important for Aqua and Ruby, as it will decide their future, as well.

In general, Hikaru is probably meant to be a negative foil (a jungian shadow) to the twins, as he represents their darkest parts. In particular, it is gonna be interesting if he foils them not only on the main theme of love, but also on the theme of lies and truth.

Aqua explores the idea of lies. He hides things from others and manipulates them. At the same time, he also experiences how good beautiful lies can be (his happy life when he thinks his father died). Most of all, though, he embodies the idea that a lie can become truth and vice versa. For example, his most effective manipulation technique is to mix his true feelings with his lies. He tells Kana she is cute because he thinks so. He tells Akane he is interested in her as an actress because it is true. He manipulates both girls, but his feelings are genuine.

Ruby explores the idea of truth. She hates liars and doesn't want to lie even if it would help her become an idol faster. Still, she experiences how painful truth can be (her discovery of Gorou's body). This leads her to lie to both herself and others. In the end, though, an even more painful truth comes out (her parents do not love her). No matter how much Ruby tries to hide her feelings, truth will come out. And yet, despite how agonizing it is, truth also leads to happiness. She is devastated after seeing Sarina's mother again, but this lets Ruby and Aqua find each other as Sarina and Gorou. As a result, Ruby is now happier and stronger.

So, in which way may Hikaru foil his children here? There might already be hints:

Just like Aqua, Hikaru is a master at manipulating others with truth. After all, it is implied he manipulated his rapist's husband to kill her by revealing her infidelity. Similarly, he orchestrates Ai's death by telling an unstable fan about her pregnancy. Even when it comes to Yura Katayose, he openly tells the actress to watch her step. An open threath masked as advice.

Just like Ruby, it is possible Hikaru values truth and hates liars. This could easily tie in his backstory and explain why his relationship with Ai degenerates:

I shall lie today as well (Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!) Hoping that one day, these words will become true (Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!) And yet, still, (Hey! Hey!) I have been unable to tell you, and you, alone (Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!)

Ai sees herself as a liar unable to love. This is obviously the real lie, as her heart is full of love. Still, it wouldn't be surprising if Ai's own issues exasperated Hikaru's fear to be used again. From what we know, it is probable Ai and Hikaru have feelings for each other, at a certain point. Then things go bad. What if Ai's inability to express her love and Hikaru's inability to understand lead to their breakout and eventual tragedy?

Obviously, this is all a theory, but one thing is sure. Ai and Hikaru's relationship is key for understanding their characters and their legacy to the twins. Still, Ai is already dead and Hikaru will die in the end. How can their story find a closure, then?

A WORK OF FICTION TO SHOW THE TRUTH

The climax of the series is building up towards the movie, which is gonna represent Hikaru and Ai's story.

Interestingly, Aqua is playing Hikaru, while Ruby is playing Ai. It is obvious a lot of emotional payoff rides on this. On the one hand it is gonna be a chance for Aqua and Ruby to sort out their feelings towards each other. On the other hand Kana and Akane will probably do the same, which will solve their love triangle with Aqua. (spoiler - KanaXAqua is probably endgame).

What is really interesting, though, is that the movie is set up to reveal who Ai really is. After all, the godly idol asks the director to film the real her and this request should be satisfied. Not only that, but Ai leaves her children 2 tapes whose contents are still to be shown. So, whatever Ai's legacy is, it will be made clear. This is true also for her bond with Hikaru:

So, does Ai forgive Hikaru or not? Her children seem to believe in the latter. However, the former is probably true.

First of all, it is probable Ai realizes Hikaru is behind her murder. The stalker arrives with a bouquet of white roses, which are associated to Hikaru. Moreover, Hikaru is the only person, who knows both about the twins and the new address. Secondly, Ai shows no rage nor fear for the fan who murders her. The man is clearly a stand-in for Hikaru in the scene. Despite his actions, Ai does not lose time hating him, but spends her final moments affirming her love for her and Hikaru's children. In short, Ai possibly knows of Hikaru's involvement, but doesn't regret their kids.

Still, will Aqua and Ruby portray this in their movie? And does Aqua's revenge ride on Ai's forgiveness or hate towards Hikaru? Will the twins understand their mother?

Whatever the result, it is probable Aqua and Ruby will eventually run into their father. In particular, Hikaru is set up as a threath to the 3 main girls:

He sends Akane white roses and she is determined to stop Aqua's revenge, which may put her in harm's way

He is the thematically opposite of Kana. He embodies twisted love and twisted truth. She embodies healthy love and genuine feelings

Finally, there is several build up towards him trying to eventually kill Ruby:

He comments that Ruby is growing up beautiful

He kills Yura, who is the original first choice for Ai's role

Ruby ends up playing Ai in the movie

If this third scenario becomes true, it could give closure to all the character arcs. Ruby may empathize with Ai and forgive her father. Aqua may be given the chance to save Ruby (symbolically both Ai and Sarina) this time. Finally, the outcome may offer catharsis to Hikaru before he dies. In short, I think Hikaru is gonna die, but that the twins are not killing him. Rather, they are gonna understand their mother's feelings and survive their parents' tragedy.

A SECOND CHANCE

Hikaru and Ai's story is a sad one, but Aqua and Ruby's is gonna have a happy outcome. After all, the whole series is about overcoming death and getting second chances.

Gorou and Sarina both go past their deaths and are given brand new lives

The new B Komachi is a second chance for all its members. It is a second chance to live for Ruby, a second chance for Kana's career, a second chance to fulfill Mem-cho's idol dream. Finally, it is the second chance of Ichigo and Miyako's wish to come true

Miyako and Ichigo's love story will also be given a second chance

The movie is the director's second chance to realize Ai's wish to film her real self

In short, this theme is everywhere and it is possible the series ends with B Komachi performing in a dome, exactly as it starts. This time, though, things will go well.

Still, doesn't something feel odd? After all, if the series is about second chances, why isn't Ai given one?

THE REAL AI (TRUE LOVE)

I think there are 2 reasons Ai isn't reborn:

1- Aqua and Ruby are Ai's second chance

The twins are Ai's legacies and will fulfill her dream for her:

Someday, surely, I will have it all in hand I am such a greedy idol Because I wish to love everybody properly in a life-sized way

Ai's wish is to reconcile her family with her idol career. She wants to love both her children and her fans. She wants it all. Well, Aqua and Ruby come to embody these 2 different forms of love:

Aqua is given a lot of focus when it comes to personal relationships. An important part of his arc is his feelings for Akane and Kana and he is not that much interested in the enterteinment business per se. In the end, he may also choose to fulfill his dream to become a surgeon

Ruby's dream is to become an idol, who shines even more brightly than Ai. Moreover, Ruby's wish is pure in how she doesn't want to lie nor to manipulate others to get there. She is right now also stepping into the role of actress, so by the end Ruby may catch up and surpass Ai in both her careers (idol and actress)

In other words, Aqua may live the love of a happy relationship and family, while Ruby may live the love of openly loving the world and people in general. Whatever the case, Aqua and Ruby will fulfill Ai's main wish which is for them to grow up healthy and happy.

2- Ai doesn't need reincarnation because she in fact does fulfill her dream

Ai wants to love both her family and her fans, which is what she does at the very end.

She remembers the stalker's name and his present. She proves to him she never took her fans for granted

She is able to tell her children she loves them and realizes she is not lying

Ah, I've said it now at last This is definitely not a lie; I love you

Ai's wish is to love and to be loved and she gets it through her twins. Aqua and Ruby feel they owe their mother something and that it is cruel they get to live a second life, while Ai doesn't. Still, they are wrong. If Gorou and Sarina were not reborn, Ai would have had a stillbirth, which would have broken her. Just by existing, they fulfill Ai's dream. They give Ai the love she so desperately craves.

By the end, Hoshino Ai becomes the embodyment of true love. True love isn't perfect. It is complicated, as people struggle and make mistakes. Still, if the wish is genuine enough, it shines incredibly bright. So does Ai, not as an idol, but as a real person (the true Ai).

#oshi no ko #oshi no ko meta #oshi no ko theory #ai hoshino #aqua hoshino #ruby hoshino #hikaru kamiki #my meta

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lasnevadaslaborunion · 1 year

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For the record, I don't hate Dream fans.

I hate that a young woman's life could have been ruined because she opened up about something that very understandably left her feeling betrayed and exploited.

I hate that a piss-poor response riddled with manipulative language and a legal threat was enough to quell the conversation.

I hate that nit-picking and hair-splitting over legalities and the definition of one word obscured serious discussion of the facts of the situation.

I hate that I've been made to feel like a hysterical, puritanical weirdo for believing that celebrities in their twenties shouldn't flirt with 17 year old fans.

I hate that I poured a year of my life into something I now have trouble looking back on.

I hate that I can't watch manhunt videos with my ten-year-old sister anymore without feeling a sick pit in my stomach.

I hate that a community I loved became a hundred times more hostile overnight.

I hate that I've had to watch people I once respected and cared about show their true colors in response to this situation - first minimizing the severity of the claims, then insulting the victim, then ignoring or endorsing the hate that former friends faced for simply expressing discomfort.

I hate that people who have openly wished death on others continue to be encouraged and laughed along with, all for the sake of someone they have never met and almost certainly never will meet.

I hate that these people, themselves, may have faced harassment and cruelty in the past for enjoying something viewed not only as immoral, but as the internet's greatest crime of all: cringy.

I hate that even the people who once devoted all their effort to lambasting Dream for everything he's ever done have just casually thrown the most severe accusation onto the pile of "cringe" things he's done.

I hate that bad actors have made so many false or overblown accusations in the past that we've collectively become desensitized to them.

I hate that this fandom has fostered such an environment that any criticism is treated like baseless and malicious slander.

I hate that this post is going to get brushed off as "obsessed parasocial dranti-ism" even though I've tried so hard to avoid having to see or think about this man and everything surrounding him.

I hate that we will likely never get closure or know for certain how much of Amanda's story was true.

I hate that so many people, right off the bat, refused to consider the possibility of any of it being true.

I hate that practically nothing has changed since October.

I hate feeling like nothing is going to change.

#discourse #the dream situation #tw grooming #negativity

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accio-victuuri · 6 months

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i posted about this moment of yibo with his fellow starry oceans “classmates” and apparently more stuff happened later. this group/project was actually an effort by the golden rooster awards wherein veteran members of c-ent will refer young actors/actresses to be included. they will get to go to the event among other things and really, to represent the future of chinese cinema. but as we all know — yibo is a cut above the rest not only because of his popularity, but he is already nominated for an award that night. two things i wanna focus on. apart from him being at the center of the class photo.

1. Deng Chao actually came in at some point to engage with them. He cued WYB, asking him to give a small speech but WYB refused gracefully. You can say that it’s because he isn’t fond of speaking but I realized it’s more than that. He doesn’t want to hog the spotlight this time. He probably knows how his name was the only mentioned in one of the press release for it. Plus he already came in “late” so he doesn’t want to act more of a “star” even if he has the right to.

He wants to give other people a chance. He’s not some fame hungry celebrity who will jump at every chance to make himself the center of attention. At this time in his career, he actually understands what this program was about. To bring attention to lesser known actors/actresses so they can shine too. Even if some of these people will probably willingly or not stab him in the back at some point— he is still very generous and wanted them to get their moment. I always say that WYB is a good boy and this is what I mean by that. It’s easy to be good when everything is fine and dandy. But for someone like WYB who’s fielding fans and antis, he still chooses to be kind and focus on his work.

It’s what really sets him apart. It’s who he is as a person. You can be the most handsome, well dressed, best in acting, most popular — but you can’t fake what is already natural for WYB. He is genuinely a good person. I could never. Honestly. He is too good for this industry.

2. There are talks about him dashing off and leaving early. He only did this after telling Deng Chao ( to those who don’t know him, short answer is he is a senior in the movie industry ) about it. He was also very smiley and courteous while doing it. Plus we all know how busy his schedule. Even arriving at his hotel, tons of people were waiting for him.

to some, this may seem like he is acting like a diva but it reminds me of when he said that his time is not his own. one can only imagine how coordinated his schedule must be so he can give his attention to everything that needs it. 🤍

#wang yibo #hahahahaha sorry i’m not done with being an obnoxious yibo stan #i can’t turn it off

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three--rings · 1 year

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okay so i’m gonna talk about the build thing.

I’m not going to get into the whole thing and what I think tho. Like, I have a lot of thoughts. But the thing is that I don’t KNOW anything. I don’t know these people. I can’t speak to them in any way.

We have literally ZERO facts. There is not a single fact that we, the public, have received that has any evidence behind it. We have a bunch of one-sided claims and... some messages? And some faked photo “evidence” from pinterest.

We don’t have any basis for making a judgement on anything solid whatsoever. The only people who can do that are first of all police and legal proceedings, which I very much doubt are going to actually come to pass, and if they did would take absolutely forever to shuffle out.

And secondly BOC as an employer. Which is where we can expect some kind of eventual decision, whatever it may be.

But what has truly upset me since this broke, besides just the natural grief of the situation, is the fandom response. It’s been truly horrendous.

The reaction which I expect from a fandom to this kind of news is shock, upset, grief, confusion, bargaining, etc. And support of each other as we wait for the full fallout.

Instead I’ve seen celebration, I-told-you-so’s, endless attacks on people who refuse to immediately renounce their support of build, or who are at all measured or hesitant in their response. Calls to reject not only the actor but the ship, the fandom, the production company. Comparisons to other actors to highlight how their fave could never. Finger pointing in every possible direction.

In other words, the fandom eating itself alive. And is it maybe a small minority of people being toxic and most people being silent? Yeah, it always is. But it’s so fucking painful to me and to the fandom as a whole.

Callout culture has reached a point where when anything happens the only performatively pure action to take is to immediately and loudly cut yourself off publicly from anyone at all likely to be tainted in accusation. Which is exactly why people with bad motives can use accusations to inflict harm on people they want to hurt.

I’ve seen over and over people being angry and upset that things aren’t moving faster with this situation, that there hasn’t been more statements and official shit done and like, it’s been less than two days? On a weekend? Do you really want the official procedures of ANY employer to work so fast that someone is fired within hours of anyone saying something bad about them, because that’s what people are literally calling for.

I know it sounds like I’m taking one side here, but honestly I’m not. No I don’t want the accusations to be true, because NO ONE should want them to be true. But I can’t speak to their truth at all, because I have no basis to do so. Except that what has been produced so far has been show NOT to be true (the photographs). But there’s plenty of toxicity to go around in this situation.

What I want is for the actual truth to be known and acted on appropriately. That doesn’t need to involve dragging facts out onto twitter or into the public eye, either. The fandom isn’t judge and jury. Victims shouldn’t be paraded through the virtual town square to be ripped apart.

People are mourning right now. What I’m mourning is the loss of a fandom that wasn’t as divisive and at each other’s throats as my last two. Where I could just go to enjoy stuff without constant infighting. Well, guess that’s fucking over.

People are reliving their own abuse. I know I am.

STOP ATTACKING FELLOW FANS. STOP ATTACKING PEOPLE MOURNING.

How individual fans respond to this isn’t any of your fucking business. People are allowed to wait to see what happens before making judgments. People are allowed time and space to process. Shut the fuck up already.

#yeah that's it fuckit #build jakapan #boc #tw: abuse #sorry I forgot that tw it's been a few days

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blainesebastian · 2 years

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it’s my party (and i’ll cry if i want to)

words: 1,829 ship: austin butler x reader summary: (anon request): angst and drama but ends well notes: thanks for the request! hope you enjoy :) warnings: none tag list: @killerqueenfan, @karamelcoveredolicity, @elizabethrosecresswell, @gigisworldsstuff

You’ve called him three times and at this point, another time seems like overkill.

You’re usually not a person who overdoes it and granted, even this feels a little tame. You’ve called him over the span of a few hours, not all at once. It’s just, you had a bad feeling ever since you woke up this morning that things weren’t going to go your way. It’s your birthday, you were already a little apprehensive about celebrating it because nothing ever seems to go as you want it to, and when Austin promised he’d be home at a certain hour to celebrate, you took him at his word.

You know that dating an actor isn’t always smooth sailing, you know that he is sometimes, at the last minute, drawn into things he can’t get out of. Meetings, dinners, parties, events, mixers, whatever—you accept that, you understand, you’ve never put any pressure on Austin to somehow dip out of responsibilities just to spend time with you. You wouldn’t want to be that kind of girlfriend, anyways, that doesn’t support him? But at the same time, you just thought today would be a bit different.

A few days prior, you tried to tell Austin that you didn’t need anything special for your birthday—that you wouldn’t even be offended if they just moved through the week as if it was a normal day. But your boyfriend wouldn’t hear it, insisted that you deserved to be celebrated. And that sentiment is all well and good…as long as someone shows up to support those words and promises. You can’t believe you went from not wanting anything at all to somehow letting Austin talk you into deserving all the bells and whistles and now you’re pissed off that he’s late, MIA and that you can’t get ahold of him.

So ridiculous.

You are trying so hard, and failing, not to completely stew in your apartment because you understand that unexpected things can come up but that does not mean communication should just completely disappear? Then there’s the smallest part of you that’s worried because what if something awful happened and that’s why he’s not calling you back?

You wander over to your kitchen to get yourself a glass of water and look over at the door when you hear the familiar sound of keys turning in the lock. Setting the glass down, you watch as Austin comes in and toes off his shoes, the door closing behind him. Sticking his hands into the pockets of his black jean jacket, he turns to see you in the kitchen and offers you a small smile.

“Hey—you look nice.” He runs a hand through his jet-black strands, some refusing to move and reverting back to hovering over his forehead, “What’re you all dressed up for?”

You’re pretty sure your mouth falls open when he says that, “What do you mean what am I dressed up for?”

Austin sort of blinks at the tone of your voice before his eyes widen in realization, “Oh shit—no it’s,” He pats his pockets for his phone, slipping it out of his back pocket. “Fuck, I thought it was Tuesday.”

“It’s Wednesday.” You state with similar vinegar and just—you don’t want to be upset, you really don’t, you can see what’s happening right on Austin’s face. He’s lost track of the week, he thought your birthday was tomorrow, the man works long fucking hours and does exhausting things for his career that you can’t even dream of doing yourself.

And yet, you can’t find it within yourself to forgive him so easily either, something that you might otherwise brush off your shoulders—he forgot your fucking birthday. You cross your arms over your chest, trying not to boil but then Austin opens his mouth again and it’s like he’s trying to piss you off by saying all the wrong things,

“I’m so sorry—I got caught up runnin’ lines with Oliva and we just, ordered take-out—”

The thing is, you are not threatened by Austin’s beautiful co-worker, she’s nothing but sweet and completely supportive of Austin and your relationship. But it does rub salt in the wound, that he was eating dinner with another woman while you were waiting here feeling like a clown in your apartment for him to come home. And while you know that it’s not exactly fair? It still doesn’t make it hurt any less.

You put your hand up to try and just…stop this whole conversation because you feel like you’re going to lose your goddamn mind. “This is exactly why I didn’t want to do anything—my birthday is notorious for disappointing me one way or another. This is a new one though, so,” You toe off the booties you were wearing, starting to unzip your dress to get back into your comfortable clothes, “Thanks for that.”

Austin sighs softly, his one hand running over his face before pinching the bridge of his nose, “I said I was sorry.”

“Okay, and?” You throw over your shoulder, moving into your bedroom to take the dress off and put on a pair of sweats and a t-shirt, “Saying you’re sorry doesn’t magically make everything better.”

Distantly, you have no idea why you’re trying to continue this argument with him. He’s apologized, it was a mistake, and you don’t even like your birthday that much anyways. And yet you know it has everything to do with that fluttering feeling inside your chest that this one might be different, that it might actually be enjoyable where you don’t feel like you might dread it next year, that Austin could make it…worth it. You hate feeling like you’re naïve, that the emotion was crushed inside of you when he didn’t show up and you waited and it felt like some sort of high school flashback where your date ditched you at prom.

You could just forget it, move on, maybe have a small celebration tomorrow.

But it’s your party and you’ll cry if you want to, right?

“Okay, well let me try and fix it?” He offers, leaning against the doorframe, “We could still make a night out of it—maybe sit on the roof? Order dinner?”

“You already had dinner.” You comment shortly, passing him. You need to get out of this damn apartment, get some fresh air before you really start saying things you might regret.

“Don’t follow me,” You warn, not even bothering at this point to put shoes on as you snatch at a jacket on the clothes tree near the front door and close it behind you as you leave.

Dramatic exit? One hundred percent, but it was feeling like the walls were closing in on you in that apartment. You just need to calm down, take some deep breaths, get the images out of your head of Austin running lines with Oliva, laughing with her, sharing take-out while you were calling his phone and waiting for him to come home. You know that Austin loves you, you trust him more than anyone, and despite tonight, your relationship is on very strong ground. You just…you’re jealous and annoyed that things played out as they did.

Shaking your head, you run a hand through your hair and make your way up to the roof of your apartment building. There’s a patio for tenants, lawn chairs, tables, even a couch and pool tables, beautiful view of the city. Just a great place to not feel so claustrophobic. If Austin wants to attempt to rebuild some bridges tonight, he can find you there—it’s one of your safe spaces.

Guilt pools in your stomach and you try to dismiss those emotions as much as you can because that’s the last thing you want to feel. Aren’t you justified in being pissed off? Ugh, maybe you shouldn’t have been so snappy. Or maybe it’s okay that you stood your ground for once.

While this inner battle ping-pongs back and forth in your mind, you push open the door to the roof after climbing the stairs—

And nearly have a heart attack when people suddenly yell surprise!

You stand there for a long few moments, almost like you might be having an out-of-body experience as you stare back at the crowd gathered on the roof and slowly recognize family members, friends, neighbors, co-workers.

This is a surprise party for you.

You take a step back out of instinct and bump into someone, turning to see Austin and your cheeks are suddenly so red, so hot that you’re pretty sure your shirt might catch on fire. “You didn’t…” You mumble, unable to find the rest of the words.

He smiles softly and sticks his hands into his jeans, “I would never forget your birthday.”

You shake your head, biting down on your lower lip so hard it could draw blood. How are you supposed to even look at him? So many dueling emotions are crashing over you like waves, your chest feels like it might cave in on itself. You don’t even know what to say.

“You were right, I was supposed to be here hours ago—I am sorry for that,” Austin sighs, “The cake I ordered got delivered to set in the wrong place and…it ended up in the food tent, so I was scramblin’ to get you another one. You’d think bein’ Austin Butler and everythin’ would make it easier ordering a cake.” He’s teasing with that last part, reaching to touch your shoulders with his hands, “I kinda had to improvise when I got home, get you to the roof.”

A choked laugh leaves your lips, rubbing at your own cheeks. Instead, you tore off the cute dress you were wearing, left the apartment in your around-the-house clothes and stormed on up here—

“Well, I’m here.” You sigh dramatically, head tipped back just a little.

Austin chuckles warmly, pulling you close to wrap you in a hug. Hopefully everyone behind you two on the roof can’t hear this scene unfold because you’re embarrassed enough. You already know your parents are somewhere recording and or taking pictures. You allow your eyes to close for a few moments, arms slipping around Austin’s back to hug him tightly, burying your face in his chest. He presses his lips to your hairline, squeezing you, his hands tracing circles into your spine.

“Happy birthday,” He says as you pull back. His hands move to cup your cheeks, stroking gently and smirking a little at the red splotches that must still be there.

There are so many things that you want to say or…to apologize for being snippy even if you didn’t know, for storming out, something anything. And yet, you lean up on your toes and press a soft kiss to his lips,

“No more surprise parties…ever again.”

Austin laughs, gently turning you around to push you out onto the roof and into the festivities, “No promises.”

#austin butler #austin butler x reader #austin butler imagine #austin butler drabble #austin butler fic #elvis 2022 #mccall writes things

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stuckinapril · 2 months

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i saw ur post on how there isnt rlly a big arab figure, and wow like. i think that if i had been younger and saw just one or two arab people on tv in a positive way, it would have helped me a LOT. like yeah. There ISNT a big singer or character or actor or model that’s arab. And now im sitting here wondering how many kids are going to be sitting and watching tv and just blocking out their arab heritage and culture because then they wouldnt be like their favorite singer or wtver.

Exactly. Exactly exactly exactly. I’ve full chest said this before, but I wasn’t always as attached to my Arab heritage as I am now. I actually grew up pretty distant from it all around, and it’s only in recent years that I started making a concerted effort to delve into it. And I can’t even blame it on my mom tbh, like I grew up in a lax household that allowed for ample self-expression. It was always the outside world that would make a little Arab girl like me question the worth of her ethnic roots—especially when Arabs are painted as terrorists at worst and as monocultural heathens at best where I’m from (hint: the USA). There is so much to unpack w being raised American but being ethnically Iraqi!! Because that means I literally hail from two countries!! A country that’s thirsty and a country that’s on fire!! But that’s a whole other loaded topic I could write a separate dissertation on.

I’d always have toxic thought loops like “I don’t look Arab enough” “I’m not religious but all the Arab girls I know are Muslim” on and on and on. And like I said in that ask, there was never an Arab American A lister for me to kind of have a frame of reference w. This is specifically an Arab issue too I feel like, bc a lot of brown people do have that star-studded figure to look up to growing up. We do not.

It’s kind of why I decided to be that for myself. I don’t need a cool Arab girl celebrity who’s into fashion or music. I’ll be that. I don’t need an Arab academia girl character. I’ll be that too. There’s no such thing as not looking Arab enough bc Arabs are so diverse. It’s okay that I’m not religious bc Arab culture is not solely defined by religion, and even if it were Arabs are not a hive mind and everyone engages w their culture in vastly different ways (which is okay!! It doesn’t make me any less Arab). I’ll literally just discard other people’s preconceived notions and trailblaze my own path!! I’ll be my own Arab girl representation. I refuse to fit myself into any preexisting mold. I like what I like and the rest just falls into place.

I think that’s why I’ve been so vocal about my Iraqi heritage lately… I’m literally healing my relationship w my roots in real time. Even advocating for Palestine is feeding into that in major ways. It’s legit all coming together for the first time in my life. Now I’m so proud to be Arab—to be Iraqi—that the idea that anyone could shame me for it is as incredulous as it is hilarious. Iraq is literally called the Cradle of Civilization & you want to make me feel BAD for being Arab… for being Iraqi… it’s just impossible bc I can’t imagine myself being anything else. I’m so content to have my multicultural background and to be who I am. I wouldn’t trade it for the world.

It’s also cool that I have people following me, that they could also be exposed to diverse facets of Arab culture bc of that, but tbh a lot of this is also purely for me. I want the Iraq tag to be flooded w beautiful Iraqi poetry and beautiful Iraqi art and beautiful Iraqi cinema as I familiarize myself w Iraqi culture more and more, bc there’s so much more to it than the Iraqi War stats that pop up when you look it up on here.

I’m a 21 year old girl AND I’m Arab. That’s literally double the self-discovery to work through. Fortunately I think I’m finally cultivating a strong sense of self, so I really don’t think anything anyone has to say could deter me from my path (whether it be in terms of reconnecting w the beauty of my Arab heritage or legit just growing into my own). It’s not always perfect by any means, but I’ve made so much headway. And absolutely nothing could take away from that.

#I had a LOT of thoughts on this but thank u for giving me the opportunity to rly unravel this anon <3 <3 <3 #I still have a lot of things to go to therapy for lmao but suppressing my Arab roots is absolutely one thing I’ll never have to talk about #the confused Arab girl who was disconnected from her heritage is DEAD give me all the Iraqi history books I want to devour them all #ask #arab tag

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enhanced-operatives-division · 26 days

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Junicrane/Starstruck Ramble

I will not be brief, all under the cut

To clear some things right off the bat:

No corpse, no proof with Juniper. Obligatory this is set in a canon where he's alive and adjacent to the agency in some way.

Reggie & Juniper are just gay to me, but I don't mind any interpretation of their sexuality

The games are set in 1967/68 to me (based on a couple bits in game) which is before it was legal to be gay in America at least (1971), which is relevant to how I interpret canon as being somewhat grounded in reality, despite unrealistic elements.

This is just an insane amount of headcanons/elements of and AU all culminated into one post. I will talk about some headcanons like they're just facts because they are established in my head, and it saves me over explaining literally everything, however I will explain some parts a little bit for clarity.

Alright. Actual beginning of the ramble:

Juniper is a character to me who had gotten so lost in his job as an actor and a social presence that in the end his whole life revolved around that 'role'. Because of this, by the time he's put into the situation where he's around the Agency, he basically knows nothing about himself, though he doesn't realise at first. Furthermore, what little identity he had has changed in so many ways. He's no longer a beloved famous actor in the prominence of public light, he's legally dead and he tarnished his career just before he was supposed to die, with the bonus of that making him lose the majority of his estate. From that, he also has horrific facial scarring from the electrical burns from literally having his face fried. I believe a friend of mine made a post about this a while ago (I also think they were the first to think it up also), but, to me, Juniper has a permanent trimmer in his right arm (aka his dominant hand) from the electrical current and it is messing with his nervous system.

All in all, he's not doing great, but he's too proud to admit that he's not doing great, because if anything, what's left of his ego is all he has as a defense since he's deep in unfamiliar water.

Before ending up around the agency (I have multiple interpretations of this, so I'm just going to bring it up generally), he'd never actually seen Reggie, and his only impression of him is a single voicemail, which was his only reference he had to later impersonate him. Juniper probably has very little feelings other than the ones he projects onto him because of Phoenix and that, at the very least, he's physically attracted to Reggie to some degree (that's like the beginning of how everything else would tumble into place in this sort of interpretation at least).

And on Crane's side? His feelings towards Juniper are probably very intense and muddled. On the one hand, he adores musical theatre, and that's his now ex-favourite actor. The thought of just casually being around him blows the bit of fanboy in him away at first because THAT'S the GUY, plus the inklings of a celebrity crush which still poke at him. And then there's the rational side of him, which knows Juniper has committed absolute atrocities on the side of Zoraxis, and hates him for that. Then there's how much Juniper comes off as an asshole at first because he refuses to cooperate with anything the Agency tried to put in place. He finds Juniper endlessly frustrating, and yet he's stuck working with him since, afterall, he's the one who knows the Agency's history with Juniper the best. I imagine him acting a lot like how he does IEYTD 1 around Juniper.

At this point, I'm just describing the pitch for a romcom.

I think the start of their relationship with one another largely started with Juniper trying to wind Crane up. It was a way of getting his attention, and I don't think Juniper knows why he's so dead set on that at first, because I don't think he realises he has a crush on 'this grump' at first. (I think that's actually the fun part about these two, because it's almost like a role reversal of the celebrity crush dynamic. This ex-big name actor has a TERRIBLE crush on an average joe and it is KILLING HIM.) But of course the Agency keeps them together because Juniper is at least conversing with Crane, so it's a start.

Through one way or another, they actually get talking casually, at least mildly at first. It takes Juniper a long time to fully deconstruct the wall he's built, and the thing is, Crane isn't the one trying to deconstruct it, at least at first, because yeah, Juniper realises if he wants Reggie to actually like him in any way, he can't keep winding him up. So they talk. Small talk at first, something rhythmic and almost easy to keep to a script. And over time that turns into actual conversations. Genuine ones in which Reggie rips out the occasional one of his jokes which Juniper is endlessly endeared about. The way he smiles just before he makes them, like he wants to chuckle at what he's about to say before he says it. That's probably when Juniper realised that he does have some vague crush on him, and that it wasn't going away.

This is what kickstarts John I can't-buy-you-things-to-impress-you-so-acts-of-service-it-is Juniper to do little things for him. It mostly starts off as him trying to make Reggie his tea how he likes it. However, the nerve damage in his arm makes that hard, as the weight of the kettle and trying to pour is hard all of a sudden. And he refuses to accept that, so he tries for a very long while. Long enough that Crane would go to investigate what was going on. And when he does see Juniper leaning over a cup with the kettle as he uneasily tries to pour it, and when Crane asks Juniper responds so matter-of-fact that his intention is nothing but genuine. And it catches Reggie off guard because Juniper hadn't done anything like that up to that point, and his very apparent vulnerability is so clearly on show.

It shifts something between them.

From that point on, conversations are longer, more familiar. Both of their attitudes soften, and Reggie makes more jokes. Juniper learns how to better use his left hand while strengthening his right back to a point where it could be used again. Slowly, they're both spending time with one another not because they have to, but just because they can. Little bits at first, not too far outside what they already were doing, but those little bits turned into long bits to a point where the other person's company was genuinely desirable.

As time passes, Juniper probably realises that he doesn't genuinely know much about himself or what hobbies he's into, because he never really had the time when he got big, and his home life in his youth wasn't bad, but it wasn't picturesque. I think Reggie would pick up on it, and absolutely try to introduce him to some things he's into. Some things stick, other things don't (corn husking very much stays Reggie's passion, and John will go with him sometimes because it's him, but it's not something he strongly cares for). Crane introduces him to a lot of music, and it's something that becomes a staple between them, with tracks they listen to more than others (tragically, I know relatively little about 60s music so I couldn't really say what). Occasionally they dance, never anything intense, think slow dancing, but the closeness is nice.

Through all of it, Juniper is battling the worst crush of his life, and he can't stand it, because I think he struggles to read people since he doesn't have anything like a script or a director to refer back to, so he has no idea if Reggie likes him back or if he's just desperate for that to be true. I think because of that any sort of confession between them would be incredibly raw, not only because of the time they live in making it hard for them to be truthful about how they love, but because it's a complete show of Juniper who's worked to be this better person. I don't exactly know how that would go, mainly because I don't have one set version of their dynamic, this post is just a generalisation of main consistent points.

Reggie does like him back, because he's gotten used to Juniper being just this guy, not a figure in the public eye, not a Zoraxis lackey, and not any sort of Agency operative (despite being under their care to some degree). He's someone he genuinely cares for, because they've given one another the time of day to learn one another, and I think because Reggie was a field agent, he was a lot better at reading Juniper than Juniper was at reading him. Eventually Juniper's company becomes something he could see around him for the rest of his life, and I think he accepts that he likes Juniper a lot more gracefully.

I think any affection directed at Juniper would at first be met with him feeling a little muddled. Reggie was a very physically affectionate person when he could be, and sure the initial flirting with one another came with the occasional little touches, but everything now was so deeply intentional. I also don't think Juniper would almost ever get over the novelty of being able to kiss him, or many other gestures, because it made the fact that they were together so very real, and it was great. I do think it comes easier to Reggie, and it's a big way of showing how much he cares, so it's important for Juniper to try and show it back because he knows how much it means to the other.

I like the idea of them eventually living with one another, too. I think Juniper would have always had a quiet little daydream of sorts where he does just live a domestic quiet life, and he can with Reggie (well, as close as they can get between the Agency and Zoraxis always being at odds), and he loves that, and he loves him, and it's immense.

I think they cook for one another a lot, it helps Juniper work on his dexterity in a controlled environment, which means a lot because it's a huge point of insecurity (that and his scars). He does improve, and Crane is proud of that and shows it and it's great. I also think they'd probably cook together too, because they can deal with being in the kitchen together and they work well with one another. It's probably a good way for them to unwind because over time they can do it in relative silence.

As I said before, I also think music is a staple in their household, and that Reggie listens to things on vinyl almost all of the time because he likes the background noise. Sometimes Juniper will catch him chuntering along to the music which he finds endlessly endearing. I wouldn't put it past his dramatic ass to also join in to fluster Reggie, but I also don't think Reggie would mind that terribly because Juniper has listened to the music enough to know the lyrics, and that's huge to him.

I don't think they are without rough patches, no relationship is, but I think the good part about them is that they're willing to talk about it (... eventually). They're used to long conversations, and while they're often less fun conversations, they're needed and they know that, and it works out.

Alright. I think I'm done for now. I haven't mentioned everything, but this definitely got the worst of it out of my system. If you ever want to hear any specific thoughts my ask box is open but other than that, behold my general dynamic for these two which has been festering in my head for years. I think they're great

#ty right-agent for explicitly telling me that this would be welcomed you a real one #i had a massive babble to my friend abt what if they all feed me to the hounds for speaking #and he said “girl that fandom is like 12 people big they need you to speak” and yeah that also helped #i have a hard time talking if I'm not asked/prompted to that's why i adding tags is great for me. that and i like the format #anyways.#THESE TWO.............dear lord can you tell I have been unwell abt them forever..#this is propeganda (/j) for them. btw. please you have to understand the potential here. it's so good.#it's slowburn <- my (probably) demiromantic ass cannot handle romance without a build up and this set up is perfect (it will never happen)#also i find it easier to write ANYTHING between these two from Juniper's perspective because i find it easier to get into his head #idk reggie is like the gay version of the: what is he thinking of? i could take a bear in a fight. audio ive heard.#whereas with juniper i have him trapped under a microscope #im going to tag this now so i can use the remaining tags to RANT #ieytd #john juniper #reginald crane #junicrane #starstruck #i expect you to die #<- being BRAVE!!!#when I get really excited i start getting like this internal shaking feeling and uh. yeah this rant started that #the worst part abt that is it also triggers my tourettes so like. double whammy. excited about blorbos? jail :(#but. yeah I uh. yeah. sorry this IS so long..I did warn but . AUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAHHHHHHHHHAUUUUUUAHHHHHHHHHHHHH #also i did this rant in 2 parts. last night and this morning so yeah uh. yeah.#god im so messed up about these two #make me a boat by the family crest came on while wroting this and while it's mainly a roxanix song to me......AUUUUUG.....#i struggle to find music for these sillies because they have such a specific vibe to me amd I've not quite managed to find something which -#- genuinely feels correct for them and it drives me up the WALL #GOD NIGHT SHIFT JUST CAME OF SHUFFL.....all my ieytd songs are coming out to drive me up the wall.......#FINISHED I've been adding tags as I've gone alonga #thank you for reading hope you enoyed and if you didn't im sorry

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oh-my-damn · 9 months

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I will never understand the whole claim they want to keep the engagement just for themselves and family and friends as well as that they get so much hate thats why they are keeping a secret, and this coming from someone who who thinks they are real. None of what they have done previously or currently suggests they want to keep the relationship to themselves. Everything up to this point has been public. Chris has never himself directly been more attention seeking in a relationship until now. Her bff constantly makes sure he tells the public when they are in Chris's vicinity. His friends and family have played their weird games as well. If they were actually affected by hate comments and afraid of backlash and wanted true peace they wouldn't do what they do with their posts and trolling. Everything they have done thus far could have been private and we wouldn't have known anything. But like everyone else I don't know what is going on. Im not gonna say they aren't engaged but also not going to say they are without actual proof. I feel like they don't what they are themselves.

All I know is this whole relationship is whack and I've never seen a celebrity on Chris's level be this messy purposely in terms of PR and relationships not even the Hiddleston/Swift PR was this messy, cringey, toxic or pathetic. I don't even think Seb and Ale were this messy, or other RL couples. Like they're trying to be public but also private but doing it all wrong, like pick a lane. He wants to the world to know she's his but refuses to be seen with her in public. They refuse to actually post pics when they do their group trips and holidays but then will show theyre together by posting similar videos or pictures with similar backgrounds and activities and then start following each other at the same time. The way this is handled is so off when it could have the most simplest, easiest thing whether real or not. They should learn from Tomdaya now thats all couple who is private, rarely posts each other, but are seen out and about, their families and friends aren't playing dumb games and oversharing by being overly involved.

I have said it before and I'll say it again

THAT MAN DOES NOT WANT PRIVACY.

THAT MAN WANTS ATTENTION.

WOULD A MAN WHO TRULY WANTS HIS LIFE TO BE PRIVATE, BRING HIS MOM FOR INTERVIEWS TO COMMENT? WOULD HIS MOM DO HER OWN INTERVIEWS PURELY BECAUSE SHE WAS HIS MOM? WOULD HIS BROTHER USE HIM TO GET ROLES IN HOLLYWOOD????? WOULD HE POST 20 PICTURES OF HIS NEW RELATIONSHIP ALONG WITH A VIDEO OF THE INSIDE OF HER MOUTH IF HE WANTED PRIVACY? WOULD HE POST PERSONAL VIDEOS FROM HIS HOME IF HE WANTED PRIVACY?

WOULD HE DATE VERY YOUNG PEOPLE WHO CLEARLY WANT ATTENTION IF HE WAS PRIVATE??? WOULD HE ALLOW THEM TO POST IN AND ABOUT HIS HOUSE ALL THE TIME IF HE WAS TRULY PRIVATE?

HE. DOES NOT. WANT. PRIVACY.

HE. WANTS. ATTENTION.

HE IS A HOLLYWOOD ACTOR. HE LIVES FOR ATTENTION. HIS ENTIRE LIVELIHOOD DEPENDS ON IT.

THE SECOND THE ATTENTION IS OFF HIM, WHAT HAPPENS????

SOME RANDOM ARTICLE ABOUT SOMETHING COMPLETELY RIDICULOUS IS PUBLISHED.

HE IS NOT PRIVATE.

HE NEVER HAS BEEN AND HE NEVER WILL BE.

HE JUST LIKES TO SAY HE IS TO MANIPULATE HIS FANDOM INTO THINKING THEY'RE CROSSING A LINE WHEN THEY LOOK INTO THE DEEPER PARTS OF HIS LIFE - PARTS HE MADE EMBARRASSINGLY PUBLIC HIMSELF.

#mandy answers #chris evans #privacy #this is my religion #stg

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oillydiya · 3 months

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Things Between Us | Cillian Murphy x OC

Chapter 2 : Who is he?

Summary: Sansa, a 26-year-old graduate student, who unexpectedly encounters a twist of fate when she comes across an actor she never knew before!

Warnings: This fic contains explicit content related to sexuality and various age relationships. The content is not suitable for individuals under the age of 18. *The entire story is a work of fiction. All characters, time periods, and places in the story are purely imaginary.

All of a sudden!! The book on Sansa face, someone lifted it from her face… followed by a small, soft voice.

“What are you doing, nerd?”

Sansa opened her eyes to look. She narrowed her eyes slightly, allowing them to adjust to the light.

"Rest!" she replied curtly.

"Rest? In the middle of this restaurant!" her best friend Gigi repeated.

"Yes," she replied, half-smiling.

Gigi walked over and sat in the chair across from her.

"You really are a strange person," her friend complained before asking, "So what’s the matter? Why doesn’t her face look good?"

Sigh….! Sansa sighed.

"I’m not sure if I feel bad because I still can’t find a gallery to display my finished work or because I’m hungry."

"I think you’re just hungry!"

The young woman shrugged. "It’s true…hunger brings irritability. And arguing!" she told her friend with a frown.

Suddenly! Gigi shrieked with excitement!

"God!"

"What?"

"Huh, the man next to you is Cillian Murphy!" Gigi quickly replied.

"Who?"

"Damn it, Sansa. Don’t you know? He’s the guy who played Thomas Shelby."

"Who is he?" She still didn’t know.

"She really is a nerd! How is it to be British? Don’t know Thomas Shelby," Gigi scolded her young friend.

"Well, I haven’t seen many movies. And I came back to England for two years. Don’t you forget it!"

After finishing that sentence, Sansa glanced at the person her best friend was talking about just now….

She looked around for a moment…. He is a middle-aged man. Probably around forty years old. His sparkling light blue eyes really stood out to her. The face is slender and well-shaped, the lips are thick, the hair is in a beautiful, wavy style. She thought he looked very good at his age!

Ever since she sat here, Sansa didn’t care about anything or look at anyone. And she’s not much of a movie lover. Makes her unable to tell the difference between who should be an actor or an individual. And this person has a personality that looks like a normal person!

"He looks good," she told her friend after stopping to survey the actor.

"Hey! Gigi, what are you going to do?" Sansa shouted. Because right now, her friend is taking out her cell phone to secretly take pictures of the actor.

"Gigi, you have no right to take photos of other people in public without permission." Sansa quickly stopped her friend.

"Just one picture," Gigi replied in a hopeful whisper.

"I think it’s just the fact that he’s a celebrity. That made him tired enough as it was. You shouldn’t deprive him of his right to rest before he’s allowed, right?"

"Okay, I understand what you’re saying." The person who was scolded had a sad face. And put her cell phone down.

"I just want to have a picture of him to look at. I’m not lucky enough to see Cillian Murphy often."

Sansa looked at her friend’s face with understanding. She thought that Gigi was probably a fan of that actor because she looked clearly sad and disappointed.

"I’m fine. You can take a picture with me." A man at the next table spoke up.

Yes! The actor said Cillian Murphy!

"Really?" Gigi cried out happily. She quickly jumped out of her chair.

Her expression and eyes looked extremely happy.

"Please take a picture for me."

Gigi hands Sansa her cell phone. Please help be the cameraman for her and that actor.

"Smile," Sansa told them both before pressing the shutter to take three or four pictures.

Now her best friend walked back and sat down at the table like a winner. With a mouth that smiles and refuses to close!

"How am I?"

"Both are cute. Unbelievable," Sansa replied, half-sarcastic to her best friend before turning to the actor, "Thank you for taking the time to take a photo with her a moment ago."

"But what do you have today? Why did you invite me out?" Sansa’s best friend asked curiously.

"I want you to help critique the finals. I have to send them to the professor tomorrow."

"Um! I don’t think it will happen today."

Sansa’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. When her friend had such a negative expression, it was unusual because normally Gigi never rejected her. No matter what, Gigi is always ready by she side. But this time it’s not!

Sansa narrowed her eyes, a mischievous smile curling the corners of her mouth, before using the persuasive course that she usually uses to attack Gigi.

"Please, please Gigi…. If I don’t have you, I cannot criticize any work in my own life."

The young woman grabbed her best friend’s wrist and held her. Sansa began to press her lips sweetly…. Sniff…. Before pulling the back of Gigi’s hand and rubbing it on her own left cheek. With a soft kiss all over the back of that hand.

"Please, Gigi, na….Gigi."

And the coolest trick she likes to use is the purring sound of little kittens.

"Please, Gigi, nuh…ngh…na…meow…meow na na." Her cheek continued to rub the back of Gigi hand without stopping.

She increased the pressure with her eyes sparkling from tears. Pretending to squeeze to attack her dear friend, found something like this… Anyway, Gigi will definitely accept her!

"Okay, okay, stop…stop it! Stop making that little cat sound," Gigi said half-laughing. Ready to pull out her hand.

"Today I really couldn’t go help her criticize her work. I have an appointment with David’s parents."

She made a serious face, ready to explain the reasons. "I also had to stay at his house. Because tomorrow we’re going to have a picnic in Scotland."

The young woman listened to her best friend’s answer. She leaned over and crossed her arms over her chest in dissatisfaction.

"You’re the meanest witch of this century!" Sansa angrily cursed at Gigi.

"You’re also the naughtiest girl I’ve ever met," she replied to Sansa, amused.

"Brae!!" The girl stuck out her tongue at her best friend instead of answering.

Sansa is currently busy drinking a chocolate cheese milkshake, which the employee had just served to her a moment ago.

"I think you need a partner."

Her best friend turned and spoke in a serious tone while staring at the young woman with concern.

"What do you mean?" Sansa were confused by her friend’s words.

"I think you should find a boyfriend. Or go party, make friends, socialize, and you should have friends other than me," Gigi said.

"I party a lot."

"Drinking wine, listening to music and dancing alone in the apartment. That’s not called a party, Sansa!" Gigi roared!

"I already have you as a friend. There is no need for more."

She replied because she really thought this way.

"But you can’t have me as your only friend for the rest of your life, you know that? You should get to know other people."

Sigh!....Sansa sighed.

"Oh, Gigi! You know I'm not good at interacting with other people. It's too difficult for me."

"I just want you to stop being so introverted and have other friends. The fact that you're so wrapped up in being alone like this is not good at all. I'm worried about you, you know that?" Her friend complained lamentably.

"Are you annoyed with me now?"

"Crazy... I've never been annoyed by you. I just feel bad when you need help. But I can't help you."

Her best friend looked at the young woman with concern and continued, "I just want you to have someone to help you when you need it."

Sansa looked at her friend with fond eyes. She understood Gigi’s concern for her. But damn! Having to socialize or interact with other people is so... There was no one around her that she felt close to, except for this one person, Gigi. Gigi was like a friend, an older sister, and the two of them grew up together. Both of them are like members of the same family. And allowing herself to make friends with people she doesn’t know is very difficult. The girl was too embarrassed to talk to anyone!

"Hey... I’m okay. I’ll find a way out, okay? You don’t have to worry," Sansa replied, giving Gigi a reassuring smile.

"I’m telling the truth. You should have someone," her friend continued to say with a serious expression.

"I'm fine, and I like it. Just being happy with the things I care about is enough, right?" She replied to her dear friend.

Repeat what she think so that Gigi understands and is comfortable.

Before Mr. Louis, the owner of the shop, walked up to the table of the two young women.

"Hello, Ms. Gigi. How are you? Do you want to get anything?"

"No, today I just came out to look for this kid. I'll be gone in a moment."

"Okay." Mr. Louis turned to Sansa.

"Here! Sansa, your favorite juicy cheeseburger." He placed the plate of the cheeseburger in front of her.

A large cheeseburger was placed on a plate, complemented with crispy fried potatoes, and the meat was extremely juicy.

"Wow! It looks delicious. Thank you." She replied to him with the utmost happiness in her voice before lifting the cheeseburger plate and looking at it with delight.

"How is it going? The cheeseburger... Are you ready to be happy in my life?" Sansa said to the cheeseburger.

Kick... Kick... The sound of her best friend’s suppressed laughter rang out. "Did you know? I want others to see your cuteness. Just like what I’m seeing right now." The person’s voice was full of affection for the person in front of her.

Lol... Lol... Sansa laughed at her friend before joking, “You mean, you want to see a crazy person talk to a cheeseburger?”

"True, she’s a crazy girl who always does weird things." The two women laughed at each other.

Sansa picked up the cheeseburger and considered it before taking a bite.

"God," her eyes widened!

"Damn it! This cheeseburger is very delicious. It’s like going to heaven!" The young woman exclaimed, praising without stopping her mouth.

"Sansa…." A small voice interrupted.

"Cheeseburgers can’t get you to heaven. Sex can!"

"Stop it, Gigi!" She looked at her best friend’s face with a confused expression.

"Did you know? If I were beautiful like you, smart like you, I’d be going out every day and sweeping up men all over London."

Sansa’s eyes widened... Gigi’s words really made her unable to believe it. With this friend...

"Oh my gosh, Gigi, you’re a doctor, why are you giving me this kind of advice?" She blamed her dear friend before continuing to say, "Remember Sean O’Connell’s line from Mitty?"

"True beauty. Not looking for attention," the two girls said in unison, and Sansa reinforced her will…

"And I can tell you that. If I had to choose between a man and a cheeseburger. I’d prefer a cheeseburger." She replied to her best friend in an irritated mood.

"Of course… because you don’t know how to have sex yet!!!" Gigi shot back at the person in front of her with the expression of an extremely bored person.

"Stop talking about it! You’re making me nauseous. Can I be happy with this cheeseburger for just ten seconds?" Sansa was annoyed and embarrassed because this was in the middle of a restaurant.

Gigi tried to say something, but Sansa quickly raised her hand to cut her off. Ready to count on fingers according to seconds. One…two…three at her best friend. Before the girl could stop teasing, because right now, Gigi’s expression doesn’t look very happy with her actions.

"Okay, okay, I’m sorry," she apologized to make her best friend’s mood better.

"Uh!... But are you coming back yet?" Sansa realized. Just the other day, she had accidentally composed a song, and today she brought that song notebook with her. Sansa wanted her friends to critique her lyrics.

"Not yet. I’m going to stay with you for a while and then go to David’s house."

"Then would you please critique the song I composed? I just put in the melody. Not sure if it’s good or not. In any case, you can’t stay and help critique the finals for me."

"Sure, let me take a look."

Sansa quickly turned around and searched for the notebook in her bag, then handed it to her friend to see.

"Will you let me sing to you? So that you can understand the melody."

“Sure! Sing it.”

" ..Your Words Are Sweeter Than Honey You Nourish My Soul

Oh Just To Know You Is To Love Come And Make Me Whole

Take Me To The River I Will Swim I Will Swim

Take Me To The River I Will Swim I Will Swim. "

Sansa wasn’t sure if she sang well or not, but she tried to sing to Gigi. Will her understand the melody and content as completely as possible? She noticed that Gigi’s expression looked amazed. Her best friend sat still, listening intently with a bright smile on her face.

“There you are! Will you be good at everything? And damn! I never knew your voice was this beautiful.”

Sansa rolled her eyes and looked up at her friend.

“I sing 'Happy Birthday' to you every year. How can you not know what I sound like?” she reminded with a laugh.

“True, but it’s not the same,” Gigi laughed.

“So, how was it? Is the melody enough? Does it go well with the lyrics?”

“That’s great. But I wonder how you can write such a profound love song even though you’ve never been in love?” The listener’s eyebrows furrowed curiously.

“People don’t have to be in love to write love songs. Just add your imagination and feelings. I wrote this song because I read a book about it. Love is a river,” Sansa answered proudly.

“You really are incredible,” Gigi replied with a mysterious smile.

“I think I’ll try adding some piano notes. Not sure if it will turn out well or not?”

“Try it! I definitely think you did a great job. But now I have to go,” said the female friend.

“Are you leaving now?” The person being told goodbye sat with a sad face.

“Um, you can do it, right? It means criticizing the work. You have to help yourself. Please help yourself.”

“I think I can do it. It must have been rubbed away,” she replied.

Gigi packed up her things, got up, and prepared to leave. “I’m leaving.”

A close female friend walked half a step away from the table. Finally, she turned to look at the girl who was now sitting with a sad face.

"Stop giving me that face," she tells Sansa, laughing.

“What kind of face?” Sansa asked her best friend. Because she knows that this face will make Gigi’s heart soften and come back to her every time.

“You little puppy face with droopy ears and a droopy tail. Anyone who sees this must give up,” she said, returning to sit down in her original position.

“Hey, listen, I’ve known you since you were five years old. I love you so much. You're like my sister. We're like blood brothers.”

Gigi said, holding Sansa’s hand.

“Do you know that in my life I know a lot of people? But I’ve never met anyone as talented, smart, and gifted as you,” Gigi tells Sansa with heartfelt feelings.

“Don’t be kidding…she’s a doctor. That means you have to meet only talented people,” she replied as if she didn’t believe those words.

“That’s right! But you’re not like anyone, you know? You always manage to amaze me with your abilities. You’re good at almost everything. When I find out that you are good at this, you will have other things to surprise me. Can she do this too? Yes! That’s probably because you’re a nerd,” Gigi joked, laughing.

“Stop making fun of me!” Sansa who was praised folded her arms and scowled!

“Alright! I haven’t seen that finale yet. But I’m sure that piece must be excellent. Just like you always do. You’re very talented, you know? But you just lack confidence. You must have more confidence. And you have to believe that you can do it, okay?” Gigi encouraged her friend.

Before adding that, “Or if you really can’t criticize your own work. You can take a photo and send it to me. I’ll have David critique it as well."

Sigh…! Sansa sighed.

“It’s okay, art has to be seen with your own eyes. If you don’t see those images with your own eyes, you won’t understand what I’m about to say. Come on, I’m fine. I’ll find my own way. You go!” Sansa also said to her best friend. Sad tone. But she kept her feelings down because she didn’t want her to worry.

“Okay.” Gigi stood up and reached out to ruffle the girl’s hair.

“Go on, nerd. You can definitely do it.” With a hand still rubbing his head like that,

“Stop treating me like a child. I’m twenty-six already, Gigi,” she replied, looking half-annoyed and half-embarrassed.

“You’ll always be my little five year old,” Gigi pinched Sansa’s chin. Ready to shake gently. To convey the love and affection that she has for this young girl.

They embraced and kissed each other goodbye.

“Bye, witch.”

“Bye, Nerd.”

Then best friend walked away.

#cillian murphy x reader #cillian murphy x oc #cillian murphy #cillian murphy fanfiction #cillian murphy fanfic

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romirola · 2 years

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Headcanons for How the Shaw Pack Members Celebrate Birthdays

David and Angel: David is often torn as to how to approach birthdays. On one hand, he is not a fan of any event that focuses on him. He doesn’t like the idea of people planning anything elaborate for his benefit, buying him gifts, or being any sort of inconvenience. At the same time (even if he won’t explicitly admit it), David very much loves to celebrate others’ birthdays, especially after his father’s passing. Birthday parties are an official marking of time moving forward as he and those he loves grow and change, but still choose to be a part of each other’s lives. He vowed never to take time and togetherness for granted, even if it’s hard for him to show emotion. Although David usually grumbles about inconveniences and struggles to shop for gifts, everyone in the pack realizes just how happy David is during the party. When it comes to Angel’s party, David likes to keep things simple without compromising on quality. Angel’s unempowered friends will usually take them out for a night, and David often lets them do their thing and enjoy themselves independently. To celebrate together, David throws a party that includes the whole pack, featuring Angel’s favorite food and way too many cupcakes. Angel (and everyone else) always has a good time. Angel notices that David can be uncomfortable with the attention that comes along with a birthday party, but they refuse to let the date go by without recognizing it. They know David is not a fan of surprises, so they prefer to keep the party small and always give him ample warning as to when it is going to take place. That helps David let loose a little bit. Even so, David’s phone rings nonstop all day as every pack member and neighboring alpha calls to wish him a happy birthday. The party is pretty informal, usually involving some hanging out, some games, and maybe a movie. Angel orders enough food to feed an army, including a chocolate cake with buttercream frosting (David’s favorite) with a single candle so everyone can sing to him.

Asher and Babe: Asher loves birthdays and parties of all kinds, including his own. That said, he does not actually care how or when the festivities take place. Asher would be content with anything, as long as his friends, family, and Babe were there to celebrate with him. Babe often collaborates with David and Milo to help plan activities for the party, often adding little personal touches that warm Asher’s heart and show him how invested they are in making Asher happy. Once, they even arranged for three empowered character-actors to portray Kirk, Spock, and McCoy to join the party and spend time with Asher. (Babe vetted them carefully because they knew Asher would ask them questions and expect canonical commitment to the roles. Each actor gave a stellar performance.) When it comes to Babe’s birthday, Asher knows that they often have mixed feelings about the date. Time is precious to Babe, and they often hate to see themselves grow another year older and take stock of where they are in their life professionally. Even though they are in a stellar position for their age and on track to continue progressing, they always feel like they should have done more by now. Their mindset can foster feelings of anxiety or frustration with themselves, not at all the celebratory vibe Asher wants to give them. To offset that anxiety, Asher declares the entire month “Babe’s Extended Birthday” and continually plans an array of activities and surprises Babe with small gifts. Babe is extremely grateful and sometimes, even looks forward to their “birth-month.”

Milo and Sweetheart: While Milo loves a good party and he enjoys hosting the group, he also likes kicking back and relaxing. For that reason, Milo always likes to go out to eat to celebrate his birthday. He always says, “Because it’s my birthday, and if I want coffee with dessert, I don’t want to get up, make everyone coffee, see who wants regular or decaf, get all the mugs, yada-yada-yada. I want to say, “excuse me. Could I get some coffee, please?” Sweetheart is more than happy to oblige. Once Milo tells them where he’d like to go, Sweetheart makes all the arrangements, invites everyone, and ensures that the restaurant will have its servers sing “Happy Birthday” to Milo. They always make sure to give him a special gift with a card signed by them and Aggro. Sweetheart never used to do much for their birthday, at least until they met Milo. Even when they were a child, they never felt comfortable asking for gifts or a party ‘for no reason.’ As an adult, due to their ever-changing work schedule, they usually ended up working on their birthday anyway. All the better for Milo, surprise birthday planner extraordinaire who refuses to tolerate Sweetheart’s tepid response towards their birthday. Because Sweetheart’s actual birthday was usually off-limits for an event, Milo was able to choose a different date to plan a surprise birthday party for Sweetheart. He planned for weeks, even going so far as to wrap and to hide decoy presents in the back of their shared closet (which Sweetheart obviously found and bragged about) when their actual presents were wrapped and safely hidden away at Asher’s apartment. The gifts always include vouchers for a couples massage, given by none other than Aggro. Not only that, but Milo usually ends up staging a surprise party. The party itself changes from year to year (sometimes guests show up to the apartment suddenly with food and presents, sometimes Milo claims he needs to run an errand with Sweetheart and takes them to a restaurant, etc), meaning Sweetheart never knows what to expect and they are always genuinely surprised. Milo is so proud that he is able to find a way to get Sweetheart to enjoy their birthday, and Sweetheart is incredibly grateful to Milo every year.

Darling and Sam: Due to the circumstances of his turning, Sam struggles greatly to celebrate his death-day. Darling completely understands, so instead, they always celebrate six months after Sam’s death-day, since, according to Vincent, that’s when Sam started to integrate into the Clan and emerge from the initial stage of the bloodlust. They choose that date to celebrate because they can focus on the positive parts of Sam’s turning, including that because he was turned, he found his way into Darling’s life, and they in his. Darling makes sure to block out their whole night so they can spend it with Sam. It usually just takes the shape of a lazy night in, but Sam couldn’t love it more. He doesn’t want or need the trapping of a formal celebration. Instead, they enjoy each other’s company and reflect on all the ways their lives have changed now that they have each other. It took Sam a very long time to learn when Darling’s birthday was. They never told him, so eventually, he had to ask Asher, who has had everyone’s birthdays memorized since he was a kid. Darling never wanted to want a big birthday because they didn’t want to feel disappointed when the day passed unrecognized. Now that they have reintegrated into the pack, everyone always makes sure to wish them a happy birthday, which Darling greatly appreciates, though they still aren’t ready to allow anyone to plan a formal celebration just yet. Sam hopes someday he’ll be able to (since he knows for a fact many Shaw Pack and Solaire Clan members would love to attend), but for now, he follows Darling’s wishes. He still makes sure to spend the day with Darling, brings them their favorite food and usually one modest, practical gift so they have no choice but to accept it, and reminds them how much he loves, respects, and trusts them.

#redacted asmr #redactedverse #redacted david #redacted davey #david shaw #redacted angel #redacted asher #redacted babe #redacted milo #milo greer #redacted sweetheart #redacted darling #redacted darlin #redacted sam #sam collins #redacted shaw pack #redacted headcanons #birthday

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just-prime · 7 months

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7 down, 1 to go

We are almost in the home stretch people. One more week, and then this literal shit show will be over

This week we had Thrawn throwing shade, our heroes are reunited, and yet another dumb half hour of chasing our tails...followed by 8 minutes of credits.

First off, these actors clearly, desperately need any sort of combat training. Because everything feels so hollow and slowed down. Ahsoka was never this slow, and yes I know this isn't animation, but if nearly 60 year old Keanu Reeves can make action believable and smooth, so can 44 year old Rosario Dawson. Or 29 year old Natasha Liu Bordizzo. Or 26 year old Eman Esfandi. No hate to these actors (on this specifically) they clearly where just not given any of the proper training to pull of any of this combat believably.

Also, why is this show obsessed with making Ahsoka a FUCKING BAD PILOT. Anakin was the one (I'm assuming) who taught her to fly...so why isn't she good at it??? Every time she gets into the cockpit things immediately go badly.

Speaking of the combat, why is every shot in that chase sequence one of the same 4 angles nevers deviating from the simple tracking shot? Why is it so BORING? They could have had fun with these little bumper cars that the little hermit crab people have. Also, I struggle to believe that a species that lives on the homeworld of the Dathomiri witches are 'peaceful' and 'unarmed' and yet haven't been wiped out eons ago. Like, it's the ewoks again, but worse, because the ewoks at least had a believable amount of weapons and traps for their carnivorous teddy bear lifestyle!

Jumping back a moment to the cold open, once again this show is making me actively route against the New Republic. Remember when the New Republic was something that was to be celebrated? A representation of how good triumphs over evil, that love wins out in the end? That a father could see the error of his ways, and give everything he has to ensure that his children get to see a world better than the one he built?

3PO showing up is just one more in the long line of lazy cameos meant to engage the children and pacify the sceptics. I think we all know that if they could get away with it, Disney would have rolled out a plastic CGI soulless version of Leia. Hopefully that will never happen. Still don't understand why they didn't just have Zeb accompany 3PO to make Leia throwing around her weight more official.

Once again, I voice my complaint at this show's refusal to acknowledge Kallus. Sabine told Ezra about Zeb and Hera, why'd Alexsandr get left out? :(

Anyway, like I said, not a ton happens.

Baylan sits back and send Shin to do his dirty work. Unclear if he is still totally on board with everything that is happening.

Ahsoka swoops in at the last minute to save Ezra and Sabine.

Thrawn says "Anakin Skywalker" and doesn't immediately ask who that was, so I am taking that as a itty-bitty win for the Thrawn Alliances fans.

Oh, and the makeup still looks like absolute dog shit.

And it is very obvious that this is all going to end on a big old fucking cliffhanger to set up the Heir to the Empire movie.

So yeah, I hate everything about this, including the fact that we now have confirmation that Sabine is at least a little force sensitive.

#ahsoka critical #dave filoni critical #ahsoka spoilers #ahsoka series #rambles #thrawn #nightsisters #ezra bridger #sabine wren #star wars #where the fuck is everbody?#anti filoni

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norcalbruja · 5 months

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The Ocean Crew just coming up and freaking me out again

Around Thanksgiving / Colonizer-Celebration day, I had a dream where I was in the sequel to Black Panther: Wakanda Forever. Then me and Tenoch Huerta found out after a party that our shit-for-brains friends took both our cars to ferry the drunk folks home without asking first, so that means two POC got stranded at midnight in the suburbs, trying to walk an hour back to my place. (It wouldn’t be overtly dangerous, but my town DOES have a Ku Klux Klan history and only really tolerates the “good/respectable” minorities, so a Brown Mexican AND a Brown Asian may not have been able to flag down anyone for help.)

I didn't think much about it because I'm a writer who has REALLY coherent dreams, in which Dream-Me also can't seem to get her shit together (seriously, she gets into some escapades!). I laughed about it and I just thought it was me being bitter about my new day-job until Namor/Kukulkan showed up in one of my meditations going, "Hello, love. Did you like the dream?"

And I was like "uhhhhhhhhhhhh yes??? Hello sir—I mean Your Majesty! Or are you actually some form of Tenoch Huerta?"

As noted with the pop-culture spirits when Eric Draven came around on Undas, I never know whether these guys are the CHARACTERS or the ACTORS. I've actually encountered Marvel-Namor a couple of times, but he is extremely high-minded and insistent on getting his way, so while he’s usually pretty civil, he’s still exhausting for my introvert commoner self to deal with.

Long story short, he is not the Feathered Serpent, but he is Mexican/Mayan and is A FUCKING BIG SNAKE (like 40-foot Titanoboa levels of Big Snake!!!). Like most of the other colonized water-spirits, Kukulkan seems to know MY Water-Spirit/Giant-Squid from... you know, Spanish colonization.

Also I’ve noticed a small but distinct pattern where indigenous reptile spirits (Ulupong the spitting cobra, Lola Buwaya the crocodile, and now Namor/Kukulkan the goddamn Titanoboa) just don’t have any fucking chill. For species that are seen as cold-blooded/uncaring and often cowardly by Westerners, the difference is really surprising.

Insert “reptile spirits with metaphorical snake-tongues” jokes here.

So Kukulkan refused to leave and demanded of the Water-Spirit, "What have you been doing all this time?! Are you just her attack dog and a bedwarmer?! You act like a mortal now! As if you know nothing of our kinsmen! The only thing left of you is your eyes!"

The Water-Spirit kind of flinched like they’ve talked about it before, and he told Kukulkan, “I couldn’t grant wishes even at my peak. I don’t know how much you expect me to do now.”

Kukulkan just seethed and went, “You can do more than grant wishes. You do yourself and your wife evil to think otherwise. You act like the Spanish won, but she clings to the scraps of you like a starving creature. Perhaps she should be the water-spirit. And you the young man who knows nothing of your people.”

Dionysus came over and said, “Sir, trash-talking a traumatized guy about how he acts like a squishy human might not be that motivating. Maybe tone it down a little?”

Kukulkan then snapped at him, “GODLING, LEAVE THE WATER-SPIRITS TO OUR OWN MATTERS! Your power is from your father! My power is from myself!”

So Dionysus clearly got pissed and just... left entirely. This is the second time an Extremely Old nature-spirit brushed him off as a "godling," and I think the added jab of 'you only got a job at Mount Olympus because your daddy runs the place' was another issue.

This is why Kukulkan is exhausting for me. He essentially acts like Marvel's Kukulkan--he's very capable and cares deeply about people, but he also has unnecessary shit to say if he doesn't consider YOU capable. Active/feudalistic nobility: Fun to watch/read in stories, not fun to deal with in real life, especially with my commoner ass. :/

Anyway, he took a while to stop demanding that the Water-Spirit just Get Better Already, but this morning he finally came up and admitted, "I am no idiot. I know the Spanish broke your husband's spirit. He is not the first or the last of our kin to become so."

And I'm like, "Okay, sir. Thank you for chilling out. I wish you did that a LITTLE bit earlier."

And as for their relationship dynamics, this is another instance of "these marginalized spirits are clearly Not Straight." Kukulkan and the Water-Spirit are this weird blend of "friends who lost touch" and "ex-boyfriends who had a falling out," because Kukulkan is polite to me but WAY more intense with the Water-Spirit, who also gets distinctly hurt when Kukulkan goes on his "I remember you used to be on fucking beast-mode all the time" rants.

Also, "Otherworldly Terror that doesn't fit anywhere else" note: You know how the Water-Spirit can turn into water-shaped-like-a-man, a wave, or a waterspout? I can't remember if I posted this here, but he can use his water-form to "sprint" long distances or to dissipate through various non-waterproof things.

He doesn't do it a lot because it wears him out and it also tends to freak me out as a solid-bodied human, but Kukulkan does it ALL THE TIME. He just disintegrates into a stream of water that is much bigger than an Average Human Body could hold, and then he fucking flies/teleports(???) wherever he needs to go.

#pop culture paganism #unverified personal gnosis

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