#I make girl friends without trying
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Leon discovers something but refuses to do any self-introspection.
#mobseka#mobuseka#trapped in a dating sim: the world of otome games is tough for mobs#otome game sekai wa mob ni kibishii sekai desu#I make girl friends without trying#I want to get married because of social cues but I ewww when some girl seems attracted to me#but I'll never think about that ever uwu
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nemona feels like an obscure blorbo instead of the main rival character from the latest pokemon game because to get to her really good content from people who really get it, you first have to wade through the ocean of yandere pervert obsessive stalker annoying punchable bimbo amazon goddess interpretations of...
... a neurodivergent and possibly disabled high schooler who's desperately trying to make any friends or get any support from her rich neglectful family - while everyone in her school is jealous of their own imagined version of a privileged asshole version of her they made up - who deeply and platonically loves and supports the one new kid who agreed to take the time to get to know and respect her and her special interest without having to hold back her true self
unlike her, it's not great!
kinda feels like she has the same problem in our world that she does in hers.
#(except much hornier)#i hate to say it but i think her skin color has something to do with it#nemona pokemon#nemona#pokemon sv#pokemon scarvio#pokemon scarlet and violet#pokemon#nemonaposting#dog girl and goku memes are fine i guess#i legitimately cannot google her without a video of someone being cruel to her on purpose and making her visibly sad coming up#i don't think people like that really browse these tags but i hope they're not the reason she was not in the dlc footage at all#and thus may never get more screen time to actually be her best friend's 'rival for life' as promised before the 3 year cycle marches on#you know the dlc about nemona's best friend and 'greatest treasure' transferring to a school about the hardcore battles she's dying without#potentially abandoning her and sending her back to almost square one on having a reason to enjoy life#don't get me started yelling about that again#also i didn't mean platonically in a don't ship them kind of way you should absolutely do that if it lines up with your interpretations#i usually do in fact#just trying to emphasize the contrast between canon and fanart here#opinions of her already start off so low faith just because she's from the 10 fps pokemon game and i'll be real i wish she wasn't#i wish she and her friends were somewhere i could trust that they would be treated respectfully by their copyright holders
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for an extremely long time i couldn't get into fantasy as a genre because its so very racist and i wish i could say that its different now but. if anything its just easier to see than before
#alotta thoughts on my mind that ultimately make me go#''i really need More black friends“#like. id like to talk about this stuff and actually have a genuine conversation on this without like#some white girl butting in trying to tell me that im just looking into things too much#yall arent ready to see how much i hate elves#white tgirls in a 50 meter radius just exploded
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Shinjiham is cute when it’s romantic but tbh I think i vastly prefer the idea of them being best friends instead. Like, neither of them really saw it coming and weren’t really looking to get another best friend (Shinji has Akihiko, Kotone has Junpei and Yukari respectively) but it happens anyway. Kotone takes a liking to Shinji much faster than she does anyone else and I’d say a big reason is just the fact that he’s so reserved that it allows Kotone to do most of the talking while he just listens and they love this arrangement cuz Kotone doesn’t get to talk about her own interests very much. Though I think some of her needs to talk to Shinji stems from this insecurity that he isn’t happy in the group and she has this people pleasing problem and wants everyone to be happy so she makes a much bigger effort to talk to Shinji. And it’s very unfortunate because Shinji intentionally acts cold and distant because he doesn’t want to form any attachments because he wants to die soon, but aaaaaaaagh dammit this girl just keeps talking to him and being sweet and encouraging him to engage in his interests and share them with the others and he just can’t seem to say no when she’s got those damn puppy eyes. And Kotone is just able to get him out of his shell by being persistent but not in an overwhelming way, she’s very cheerful and supportive of him. And Shinji is able to offer her support by encouraging her to talk about herself and by making sure she’s taking care of herself. They just click really well and make such a positive dent in each other’s lives and it’s all about basic acts of kindness going a long way you know?
#persona#persona 3#kotone shiomi#shinjiro aragaki#i uh. probably didnt do much here to prove that their relationship is best when its platonic akjsks i mean idk how to convey it#that these two are just so good for each other but that im just not feeling it romantically#and why should i honestly like cant a guy and a girl just be platonic soulmates like me and jackie aljsks#plus i just have other ships with these characters i like better ahem akishinji and mitsuham yall already know#and i just feel really comforted by their relationship being best friends cuz it makes the pocket watch a lot more power of friendship#and it just. irks me the idea that its romantic love that saves shinji and its romantic love that gave him a will to live#cuz first off you can save him without romancing him and also like if you think kotone is the only person he wants to live for#youre just wrong like in fact its very clear in his social link that he feels this strong love for everyone#its literally like why other characters are so ingrained into his link he loves everyone and they love him back#its just kotone who organizes the time for them all to get together plus like idk when ppl say shinji only wants to live after romancing#kotone its like. well hes not gonna have a good time post coma then huh#and i suppose the point being made is he has to learn to live even if his gf isnt there but again like. shes not the only thing he has#idk i just hate this like pedestal romantic relationships are put on and i hate the implications that like#akihiko has been trying for years to protect shinji and his love doesnt matter cuz it isnt some heterosexual romance#grrrrr it just irks me is all and yeah i just think theyre besties who do everything together#kotone is like shinjis emotional support animal that guides him through the scary crowds and shinji is off putting enough to scare away the#meanies that come their way and they have a dress up montage and make cookies
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really wish my one friend would quit flirting with me. and trying to goad me into hanging out more. and assigning us fictional characters that are oh-so-coincidently either couples or with romantic tension. and then interrupting our gameplay to ask me repeatedly if I think they’re “like us” (which they rarely are…). and matching my icon on discord without asking (again, usually by insinuating a couple connection). and giving me random things I do not want and did not ask to receive (and then forcing me to take them???).
#storyrambles#it’s not creepy. just for context. it’s just irritating because I’ve told this person repeatedly that I’m not interested in romance.#this person is also naturally a huge romantic so it is next to impossible to tell whether it’s actual flirtation or just flirting for fun#flirting for fun is cool. I wouldn’t mind that. but if I do it once this person will take that as an invitation to do it an excessive amoun#but yeah after being given 12 roses out of the blue when I said ‘no don’t buy me flowers’. there’s only so many things that can mean#‘it’s nice to see your face you always cover it!’ …I’m masking. because of covid#I’m narrating a game and suddenly ‘I like hearing your voice I should call you every day so I can hear it for 10 minutes’. …no.#‘you have to take the snack I brought you know it’s rude to refuse a gift’ I have never refused a gift. It is rude. But also I didn’t ask.#‘you know this game is one you can play without talking so we can play more often!’ we already play games once a week for usually 3 hours.#‘but it’s not talking so it’s less social energy’ no. that is not how it works.#sorry for the rant im just. tired.#you know those people who are so pleasant to hang out with and then they try way too hard#and that’s actually what makes things awkward? rather than when they’re just being themselves?#yeah. that’s this friend here.#usually I go along with the bit but when I can never tell when the bit is actually a bit#and you insist on me taking on the ‘girl role’ for most of them#I am not going to play along.#UGH don’t get me started on the ‘you’re cute when you’re flustered’#I wasn’t even flustered. I was trying to do mental math while running on four hours of sleep and he was staring directly at me#it’s uncomfortable.#also. I never want to hear that again. fuck. ‘you’re cute when you’re angry’ ‘you’re cute when you’re upset’ ALL THE FUCKING TIME AS A KID#will I be so cute after I kick you in the nuts? will I?#(for clarity I don’t want to kick him. I want to kick those other people.)#I need a lot of alone time. I really do. I can do 3 hours and then I will be drained for the rest of the day.#‘how did you grow up? did you not talk to your mom for more than 3 hours a day?’#first of all. that’s different?#secondly we actually regularly do separate things without talking to each other. or go in separate rooms to take some time to ourselves#also I don’t have to be on high alert for if I’m going to be flirted with. so.#ugh. I like him as a friend. I really do. I know this all makes it seem like the opposite. I try so hard to be as nice as possible.#but UGHHHHHH
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said to my counsellor that i wasnt built for friendship because everyone always eventually just. stops speaking to me and she went “ok why do you think that is?” and then when i finished my dumb sad list she went “ok so maybe you aren’t good at friendship” and i. have never regretted spending £50 more in my life lol
#A RANT IN THE TAGS MY GOD I DIDNT EVEN REALISE I AM WRITING THIS WARNING RETROSPECTIVELY#£50 to feel like never trying to speak to anyone again or forge any connections THANKS RUTH#Ruth remember when I said that every friendship I’ve had I’ve never truly known if it’s a friendship or if it’s one sided#remember when I told you that my friend groups always had people who had a favourite and I was never the favourite#remember when I told you that several friend groups have disbanded but not really they actually just made new spaces without me?#remember that? remember my trauma? remember?#because I DO!!!#I was not born to have friends I don’t think#I can’t even make friends with other autistic people or other weird people or other queer people#I don’t even think I could make friends with a clone of myself#this is so guy wrenchingly isolating lol#like girl what do you want from me? keep everyone at arms length like I used to?#try not to let myself get attached to people in case they decide they don’t want to be close to me anymore?#please it is not great advice Ruth#THE WORAT PART is that I literally was like ‘I don’t message too much because I’m overbearing’#and she asked where the proof was#and all I had was the complete dissolving of any relationship where I tried or tried too hard#so now I’m left in this confusing space of do I message too much or not enough because I have no happy medium#and she knows SHE KNOWS I also have energy issues and executive dysfunction stuff going on#and I know she is just trying to help and get me to think about this stuff#but it was just not the time lmao#finnie shouts into the void
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sibling art pt 2!!!
second ask of the day and please do not feel obliged to answer either I just think you deserve to see this
they captioned this one "in honour of og Fairy being a dog"
The sensitive stomach of a dog girls VS the urge to eat whatever falls on the floor
#mdzs#equineswap au#xiao pingguo#little apple#lan wunian#fairy#Thank you and your sibling so much for this lovely art AND comic!!! Its incredibly sweet!!#I also appreciate you taking the pressure off of me posting (but also this comic is *too good* to stay hidden in my inbox/folder of joy)#Fairy is also such a mood. For me specifically.#I think most of my friends can attest to the fact I am notorious for eating things I should not#I've gotten food poisoning from things you wouldn't even think someone would attempt#There have been near scuffles as I make a dive for food that falls on the ground at the same time a pal is trying to say 'No thats Garbage!#Back to fairy...I'm hitting the gavel and declaring her both a 'tummy hurts all the time' girl#and also a 'will eat things without checking its edibility' girl.#jin ling is a dog that is so picky he wont eat anything off the floor. So someone's gotta do it.
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i realize how little i have in common with my peers simply because im not constantly on tik tok/instagram/facebook 👴
#first i just dont get 80% of the references bc i simply dont engage with them/im not curious enough about them#second new people or those that i know cant go 15 minutes without scrolling on their phone or texting#the few friends who would let me stay at their house would always sit on their phone the entire evening not really engaging with me#or trying to engage with me by showing me something they found on their phone.... girl-#i broke up with my last partner bc they were chronically online and wouldnt go to sleep without at least 1 hour of phone time in bed#im mainly complaining about the bed time phone usage thing bc it used to drive me crazy as an insomniac#and considering how many people do it just makes me completely disinterested in sharing a bedroom with other people#i am old so that must be it tho#i barely use my phone that thing can last 4 days on one battery charge (it's a good battery but still) despite my occasional yt usage#i like in person talking and i just think people lost touch with their social side the last few years :(#and it's hard for me to feel like im having an engaging conversation with someone if they're constantly checking their phone#it makes me feel really lowly of myself it hits my self-esteem hard bc this behavior shows me im too boring to have their attention#even tho they were the one to invite me over/go out with me... bro.#personal#delete later
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Hey y'all, weird question time!
Do you have any advice for stretches/exercises to improve finger dexterity/range of motion?
This question brought to you by a childhood history of being really spectacularly bad at catching footballs, several instruments I'd probably be better at playing with a better range of motion, and also the fact that I can't raise just my middle finger by itself without my other fingers also going up at least a little bit
#the person behind the yarn#tj asks weird questions#sometimes you spend like three solid school years of PE failing to catch a football#and you jam your fingers a lot (because of the aforementioned inability to catch a football correctly)#and then as an adult you don't really have full range of motion#if I try to raise just my middle finger the closest I can get is all three other fingers on my right hand bent and middle finger raised#my left hand I can do it with just my index finger bent and the other fingers down#well. mostly? idk I am bad at it#I am not bad at catching footballs anymore though!#I did eventually learn how to catch them correctly (after I was no longer in that PE class)#I was in the desert with a friend and a friend of a friend#and the friend of a friend said cleaning was a girl's job and he wouldn't carry the football back to the camp#so I threw it at him! and then he threw it back#but I refused to participate in taking the ball back to camp so we ended up kinda playing angry catch?#and I spite-learned how to both throw and catch a football#entirely so I could aim it at this dude better (we were both like...14? our decision making skills were not great lol)#we did eventually play angry catch with the football enough to make it back to the camp#because the person holding the football would not move towards the camp but the other person could#my friend did leave us both in the desert without her#...but she didn't take the football back to camp either!
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. anyway after writing the tags 4 this post i told my research partner i will no longer follow his dreams lmao. still helping w it but i need to engage in research that i find satisfying
#i think ive been waiting for something for a while and i will spend the next year waiting for it too#i thought i felt panic but i have decided to read it as anticipation. the thrill of rejection or of moving forward or the latter as#a result of the former. i left you with your backpack unattended in the cafe because on fridays i am done#putting my life on hold for another whim-without-a-warning#this cross country service is delayed by 26 minutes so i will grab a bucket and start shovelling the water away from the tracks#everyone is moving on in some different way and im sorry if you think im mean for telling you getting so drunk will disable you from#recording your brainwaves effectively but it seems like you think i owe you an awful lot. one year ago in four days my friend got me hegel's#science of logic for my birthday and i thanked him for proving to me the existence of things this is what i do he said#and then he will spend the rest of his life breathing philosophy and i dont want to spend the rest of my life#breathing someone elses dreams i wait for the moment of realisation. this is now a 30 minute delay. i was supposed to worship beautiful#things and that is what i will do. i think i have a best friend and i know i have a lover and i know to#restrict my love the way you have. im sorry. i hope you understand when i tell you. i am now sitting on the floor in the luggage section of#this incredibly busy train and i saw a photo of her with her boyfriend and her hair in braids smiling like a fool this is the#except a week ago you told me you almost took too much this time to live. you are a beautiful girl with a beautiful soul and you know you#have already changed the world and it somehow was not enough. now you are smiling without any makeup on next to him#and yesterday you cried in an airport in the states when you were too full of love. this is the most extraordinary human being i have met.#tomorrow he heads off to princeton while his best friend heads to harvard. he goes there to make the world a better place. he is the most#extraordinary person i have ever met. the issue with human beings is that we are incredibly good at almost dying and keeping going.#you try to kill yourself and publish a paper and give a talk. you negotiate the seperation between your own parents and submit another#phd application. i am surrounded by extraordinary people with extraordinary minds and incredibly broken happy hearts.#i only see you smile when you talk about robotics. i still dont know how manifolds work and i love the concept anyway. i dont know.#i do know that i refuse to live unsatisfied.#you can keep drinking. im going to drink this reality up#i think i was a horrible person and i refuse to engage with that mentality again no matter what it takes.
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so tonight my friend and i sat down in call for 2 1/2 hours and binged GX and augh. i feel like i’m always saying it and you’ve heard it before…
thank you. just, thank you. from the bottom of my heart for making me feel so welcomed and having a person to enjoy this with and being able to enjoy with other people. i really resonated with your post about feeling authentic because of this series and i’m the happiest i’ve been in months now that i’m rewatching it.
if GX is like a weighted blanket, your presence and friendship are like the warm comfort of a hot chocolate on a snowy day.
so thank you again for letting me be so free and authentic and happy, because i have someone as wonderful as you to be authentic with <3
i didn’t think i’d be a GX fan for very long, or that i’d meet someone who i’m proud to call an online sibling because of the series, but you proved me wrong and i’m so happy that i was. :)
🫂💜
🫂💖
#I genuinely think this series healed something inside of me I didn't know I'd damaged#it's so stupid but I feel like it was truly missing from my life and I didn't even know it#the way I'm still THIS DEEP and even in fact DEEPER in the trenches now 6 years out from when I watched it the first time is amazing...#I didn't think I would like it when I started it and now here I am 6 years later and it's changed my life in the best ways possible#I got into genuinely writing fanfiction because of it I started drawing more seriously even tho dm taught me how to draw basically#and honestly it's lifted me out of more crisis' and dark times than I can count. I don't know where I would be or if I would be without it#there's something so special about it that I can't explain but it is and it's everything to me#I'm the same when I'm watching it I'm the happiest I've ever been even when I feel like the most miserable girl in the world otherwise#and I can't stress enough how much I value that and this space and this time and friends like you and trying to make sure everyone has a#space to be genuine and love things uninhibitedly and unabashedly and know that you all have a safe space with me#I'm glad you found my silly little corner of the void 🫂#yugioh gx#aberooski asks
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i still can't get over my roommate implying i was autistic and my friend pulling out her phone to show me the "i'm like if a beautiful woman was an autistic little boy" meme that she'd been saving for the occasion someone acknowledged it
#HELLO#guys i try so hard to be normal how the fuck are people noticing#ALSO WHY ARE THEY ACKNOWLEDGING IT#my other friend who is actually diagnosed with autism is also such a little bitch about this#if i flinch at noises or say something a lil too blunt he pulls me aside and goes 'are u having a tism moment' cause he's terminally online#just the audacity of people to point out that ur being weird when ur being weird. HELLO RUDE#my roommate and i had a long convo about this because she's Implied this multiple times#and the first time she said it in front of people. after we went home i was like 'do u really think im autistic'#and she went 'well you know i think it's a spectrum and you're def on it but also i know lots of autistic people who have happy lives!'#and girl what the FUCK. why are u so comfortable talking to me like that#i just got very very agitated because someone's phone was ringing for a whole fucking min and they were just ignoring it. what's WRONG WITH#HER. and im allowed to have sensory issues without it being autism ok shut the fuck up#anyways. i truly don't know how im supposed to react if someone says something like this. because a. im not diagnosed#b. people are far too comfortable armchair diagnosing me. like im not Trying to be different from what's socially acceptable leave me alone#c. but i also don't want to make a big deal about it because they're just jokign around but also the joke is that im constantly weird#can someone tell me how im supposed to react to this#honestly im kinda scared to post this on the autism website.#please don't be too mean to me
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my best friend has been very distant w me lately and i asked today if she wanted to hang out and she said she probably couldn't bc it's her brothers birthday but she would let me know if she could and i have her location and i just looked and she's at her boyfriends house rn....
#we have it bc we're roomates so we started sharing locations when we first moved in like in case someone doesn't come home at night or smth#she recently told me that she wants to move out bc she has always wanted to live alone and she can finally afford it. and i asked her#directly like is there an issue because she is so non confrontational so she has never ever mentioned me doing anything that bothers her#and i said please tell me if there's something wrong because it would really suck if there was and i never got a chance to fix it because#you never told me. and she said no it has nothing to do with that i really just feel like it's time for me to live on my own. and a couple#days ago she was like okay i'm next in line for my apartment i'll probably move out in april. and i try to get her to hang out still and#she always has something else going on and i swear every night this week she's been at her boyfriends.#and if i see her around our apartment and try to make conversation at all she's so like short about it and barely responds like will only#give one word answers. i feel like it kind of started when i started dating e but i realized that i was spending less time with her and i#didn't want to be the girl that loses all my friends bc of a boyfriend so i started specifically reaching out to hang out with her and she#says no most of the time and never asks me. like i don't know what else i can do.#i'm like maybe it's bc of her boyfriend? bc they've been on again off again for a long time and previously when they were together it was#really distant with her like i barely saw her EVER. and they were mostly broken up for the past couple years and have been together i think#for a while again... but she knows i don't approve of that relationship and so she would like not say when they were talking again. so maybe#since lately they've been hanging out or dating or WHATEVER she doesn't fucking tell me what's going on with him. maybe that's why.#i literally like try to think of ways it could be my fault and maybe i'm being crazy but i cannot even think to blame myself for more than a#fleeting second bc i'm like. i have ASKED HER directly if there is an issue or something i do that bothers her and she says no. so even if#i'm somehow pissing her off would i ever know to change anything?? i just feel so frustrated bc it's like she's an entirely different person#to me. like this is not the person i know. and i don't know what else i could possibly do like i feel like we need to sit down and have a#conversation about it but what good does that do if she just acts like nothing is wrong. but i don't want to lose my friend i have such a#hard time making friends. i've known her since i was 14 like i can't imagine my life without her. we were the only two in our whole friend#group in high school to get out of the church i still love those other girls but we have so little in common now.
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Gotta love when your friend cancles your meeting that you planned a while ago because she had an appointment at the nail salon :)
#i LOVE that Really :|#(not)#like i'm really trying to be understanding#and not pissed at her because it's fine i don't need to make a big deal about this#cause the thing is we were supposed to meet and have a sleepover from today to tomorrow#but she thought it was from yesterday to today#and we realized it early enough on monday#and i told her that i can't do from tuesday to wednesday because i have work on wednesday morning (today) and i don't want to have to get up#at like 6:30 am at her house just because i have work#and she said from today to tomorrow is okay too she just had to move another thing she was doing#(which is totally okay for me)#but then she said it wasn't gonna work so maybe we could just meet up for the day without the sleepover#which is sad but it's still fun#and then she said that actually she can't meet up because she has an appointment at the nail salon today#so we didn't meet up today#and like it's fine but also it's not#cause really??#nail salon?#also this is just extra sad for me too because we were gonna do the sleepover with one of her other friends who i met at her birthday party#and who i really like and so i was really excited to also see that girl again#and now i won't :(#and i'm too scared to just ask her to meet up because like i've met her Once#anyways#this kinda reminds me of the time i was trying to meet up with my best friend and she canceled on me last minute three times in a row#which to be fair wasn't her fault at all that was her mother's fault but still#soo yeah#lea's random thoughts
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trying to convince myself im not a bad person for not always engaging in political discussions and activism and mutual aid online
#girl i was nearly a grade 10 dropout i should NOT be worrying about world issues. i have maths homework due#need to get it into my thick fucking skull that when i turn up to irl community events its enough#when i hang out with my friends and build safe queer environments for kids in this town its enough#i cant donate to someones top surgery fund because im not old enough to have access to online banking. thats ok. im still doing enough#when i dont reblog an awareness post about american legislation because it scares me and i want online to be positive space. im still enoug#the internet has soooo fucked our perceptions of activism#i am like 16 i shuold not feel responsible forsolving all of humanities issues or educating ignorant cunts.#what i SHOULD feel responsible for is trying to make the ppl in my irl community a little happier. and also trying to graduate high school.#id like to graduate high school without killing myself very much.
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When your friend who you've been crushing on asks to see your hinge profile and then tells you they like it and they think you're hot. But also you can't say anything because they just got broken up with and aren't finished processing it yet and you don't wanna make anything weird :||||||
#post#personal#void#oh my godddd#tf do I dooo#like honestly there's a strong chance this is mutual#but I feel so fucking awkwarddd#I really don't wanna say anything while she's in vulnerable state like this#or worse make her think that I'm only there for her because I have a crush on her bc I value my friendship with her so much more than that#but straight up without the context I would absolutely have read this interaction as entirely flirtatious#which tbf it still very well might be#but now seems like such a terrible time to do anything with that#like girl please I swear this shit was fading I am just trying to be a good friend right now
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