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alatismeni-theitsa · 10 months

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okay, i've heard you're one of the 'greek gods are white' people. how do you explain 'zeus athiops', considering linguistic research proved that's a word for what we now call Black. how do you explain drastically different depictions of the same deities in Syria and Lybia and more. how do you explain that a third of the pantheon have eastern roots. like girl... please get out of that mindset.

i think you need to legit drop that whole whiteness thing. it'd reductive as fuck, to us Europeans too. leave it to the people who made it, adhering to whiteness is just erasing heritages.

If that's what you got out of the discourse, you have a really USAmerican thinking pal, albeit not a USian. Or perhaps someone simplified this to you in this way and you took it word-by-word. Let me tell you what the discourse is actually about, and why there's a problem even when the Greek gods are depicted (for example) blue-eyed and blond, like N. Europeans.

It is about the treatment of pantheons by Western nations, a treatment with colonizing and imperialistic attitudes which separate the gods from their culture. A treatment that ignores depictions of a culture with an extremely large history and reduces it to distinctly Western and Anglophone pop-culture and Fandom.

Just because this happens to a nation which is considered generally light-skinned it doesn't mean it shouldn't alarm you. And the complaints of Greeks only alarm you when they address changes from lighter to significantly darker appearance, and not the opposite.

I bet you didn't send Greeks any hatemail when they were complaining about actors being too pasty and saying "This person doesn't even look like a Greek. More Irish. They even have an Irish accent…" We had this problem for centuries. N. Europeans had this super pale depiction of our gods which they considered "noble" and they saw actual Greeks are dark barbarians who are "not like the original Greeks". Now this type of projection is happening again, in order to make the West feel better, and we are actually told how we look and don't look.

Now we constantly hear "You are too light to be Greek"/"You don't look Greek" because another stereotype has settled among the powerful nations that control our image. Needless to say, this is negative too, just by the nature of being untrue, and harmful to Greek people. But this doesn't seem to worry you. You only worry when the West tells you to worry because now the cause is "noble" according to them. They never stopped seeing themselves as the righteous and noble ones. Fuck other cultures and their specific issues and histories, right?

Treating popular pantheons as a blank canvas will happen to more "races" and ethnicities when they start being considered "white" specifically in the US, our "beloved" planetarch nation. (There's already some discourse about Mexicans and Asians being the "new white"). In 50 years perhaps your grandchild will shout at a Mexican for not understanding why "it is okay" for the deity Tezcatlipoca to be depicted half-Chinese half-Nigerian.

The same thing happened to the Greeks. In many parts of the world, Greeks are still "non-white" and in the US we only recently became "white". The Middle Easterners and N.Africans are also "White" on paper. The Greek Whiteness is also only on paper, since the Westerners get the hickeys every time they hear our names, or see a part of our culture which so resembles the Middle Eastern ones. Or they clock us as Mexicans, Arabs, Turks etc. But I digress.

My point so far is that this Western approach, in its effort to be progressive, has used pantheons of foreign cultures in a way that it negates these cultures and their depictions, or their beliefs. (Something that I wouldn't call progressive)

Onto the depictions themselves. As you understand, me - and the overwhelming majority of Greeks - wants to maintain them. To this day, within the Greek culture I haven't seen depictions of native gods as - we would say today - Black. If we had some that would be okay. But we don't. I reckon, even other lands who got Hellenized didn't change the "race" of these gods. Sometimes they were alterations, yes, but to the point we are talking about a new deity, and certainly not a deity the Greeks would recognize or worship. Then we are not talking about Greek mythology, but mythology of other nations which, at some point, came in contact with the Greek culture.

But, again, it doesn't look like the Greek gods had different races in the depictions of other nations. Even today the Mediterranean and Middle Eastern nations don't racebend the gods. They see them as they are in the ancient depictions. Perhaps they indeed saw these gods looking a bit more like them but if you think Greek people and their neighbors (N. Africans, M. Easterners) belong to different races… you might want to check some racist notions you might hold.

"Aithiops" can mean "glowing" and "of burnt face". (αἴθω < πρωτοϊνδοευρωπαϊκή ρίζα *aidʰ- (φλέγω) = burn/on fire + όψη = face/look) It's an Epithet (an adjective) of Zeus on the island of Chios (Lycophron, Cass. 537, with the note of Tzetzes.). You can see where this island is and you may easily understand that it had more or less the same population as the rest of Greek areas, in which "Black" individuals were very rare.

But the most important thing is, we also haven't found a depiction of Zeus as a "Black" individual. If we had found a statue with the features of a "Black" man and the name Zeus underneath, I'd be happy to say "Some Greeks indeed saw Zeus as Black". I don't mind the "race", I mind how everyone gets in mental gymnastics to try and defend a lie just because it sounds progressive.

Perhaps in their minds this aspect of Zeus had the appearance of a Middle Eastern but... this is not what you call another race. Even today Greeks don't consider Middle Easterners and South Arabs a different "race". Also, as I said in the beginning, it could just mean "Glowing Zeus", like his face is glowing so much as if it is on fire. One word can have more than one use. The "αιθ-" root is also used about the sky, because it's glowing. The word Aether/Aitheras which we still use in Greece (αιθέρας/αιθέρες) refers to the skies. Maybe he had a "appearance/face like the sky"

Also, very important: Back then the region where the country of Ethiopia is today was called Abyssinia. The Greeks, in the period you're thinking about, probably had no contact with the land which today is Ethiopia. Aethiopia was a whole region, possibly the Middle East. (See the post here where many sources are gathered)

The first depiction of Andromeda, an Aethiopian princess as "Black" came from Ovid, who came much later and who is not part of the Greek narrative. He's also very unreliable because with his stories he wanted to oppose the status quo and therefore the mythological figures of his time. The Greek depictions have Andromeda and her family look more or less like Greeks. (Otherwise, they would have noted the difference in appearance)

Plus, Andromeda and Perseus birthed the nation of Persians. As you know, while there are "Black" Persians the population, in general, is not "Black". Plus, I am not even sure the Greeks had contact with the "Black" Persians because they are mostly extremely far south. Such a small population so down south it's not something to base the whole Look of a Nation on, at least.

It's the Northwesterners that always use the Mediterranean and Middle Eastern nations as an excuse to disrespect these depictions. (Meanwhile the Mediterranean and Middle Eastern nations don't agree with this. They never get ACTUALLY asked)

Not to mention, the changes the western nations make are not part of a cultural exchange and they don't happen naturally through cultural osmosis. It's plain theft and ownership over the gods of a foreign culture, which they have been doing for some centuries now. The Western cultures are dominant over the Greek one. We are towards the bottom of the ladder socioeconomically in Europe. The US is literally a puppet-master of the Greek nation (and many other nations). Our government can't even fart without checking with the US. Oh, and the US also helped the 70's Junta rise to power.

Lastly, the Greek gods don't have "Anatolian origin". This rhetoric (which again implies that ancient people of a region were all the same stock) has been refuted. Nobody "stole" gods from anyone. There are so many posts on these blogs about it. Greeks were also in Anatolia for 3.000 years before the genocide, so we are not even talking about separate regions. (But I know that you saw them as separate so I approached the argument the way you meant it)

There are common roots, common beginnings, perhaps but the difference grew so much that neighboring nations had distinct gods. They also believed that their gods were distinct. You have to respect that, and also you can't lump them all together because they "all look the same to you" or some sort of a similar mindset. The Greek gods are not interchangeable with the Assyrian gods etc.

One or two, like Dionysus, indeed were brought from outside. But most are considered native to the land. (Aphrodite, too, is native to the island of Cyprus) And the Greek gods are considered ethnically Greek. The Greeks considered themselves born by these gods. Each line had a god that gave birth to it or claimed to descend from a god. See more at the end of this great video: (Video with Timestamp) Again, the Greek gods are not ethnically Japanese, or ethnically Argentinian, or ethnically Norwegian. They come from a specific culture, with specific stories and appearances. You cannot imply otherwise without making all cultures a disservice.

You can see more discussions about this, including why the argument "But a minority must be represented!" kind of argument.

Some are a bit old but the general point is the same.

*In my language "Black" for a person is not exactly a positive term so it's in quotations. The term "race" is also extremely bad in Europe. I leave this disclaimer cause I know no one gives a shit if non-Anglophones must say slurs to convey a point, as long as we all speak the USAmerican way :) We also know that the individuals I am talking about weren't identifying as "Black".

#Guys I should find a way to tag this types of post and idk how #i have some stuff in my f.a.q. page but each ask is a bit different and perhaps the f.a.q. doesn't cover it #I know it's a long post so I tried to cut it relatively early :P #I TRIED #answered #xenoi doing bs #racebending

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prettyboyreid · 4 years

Text

not clickbait!

Matthew finally agrees to make a YouTube video with his girlfriend.

Warnings: none, just fluff :)

Word Count: 6,493

Special thanks to all of the anons who gave me nickname ideas :)

“Please, Matthew? It’s just this one time, I promise,” you pleaded with him, following your boyfriend around like a lost puppy through your house as you did your best to get him to join you for one of your YouTube videos.

You were quickly approaching your YouTube channel’s three year anniversary, and you wanted to do something special for it. While you had been dating Matthew for nearly five years, he’d never once made an appearance in a video. You posted about him on other social media platforms and he posted about you - you even made a brief appearance in the second season of his Unauthorized Documentaries - but he always turned you down when you offered to have him join you on a challenge or a “Get Ready With Me” video.

This time, however, you weren’t taking no for an answer.

“I don’t know, angel. It doesn’t really seem like a good idea,” he said, mindlessly wandering into your kitchen before leaning against the granite counter. You gave him a soft pout, positioning yourself between his legs as you wrapped your arms around his neck.

Matthew has always been hesitant with your relationship in the public eye. There’s fifteen years between the two of you, and he was always overprotective of you, especially when it came to the media. He knew how harsh some people could be and didn’t want anyone attacking either of you because of your relatively large age gap. It took about two years before he finally gave in and posted pictures of the two of you on social media, making your relationship “public.” You didn’t really have a problem with waiting so long; you thought it was sweet that he cared so much. Besides, it was nice to have him to yourself for a little while.

You had yet to convince him to accompany you in a video. You were an open book with your followers and subscribers - they were a big part of your life. You wanted them to know about you and Matthew, and you thought the best way to do so was having him in a video with you. A person can be completely different in a video than they appear in a photo.

“Come on, Matty,” you groaned, drawling out the last syllable as you let your head fall back in frustration. You felt his hands move to your hips and squeeze softly, sighing heavily at your insistent nature.

“Okay! Okay, fine, I’ll do a video with you,” he said tilting your head back up by your chin so you could look at him again with a bright smile. “What video are we doing? You’re not going to strap me to the side of a rickety old airplane or anything, right?” he asked.

He looked genuinely worried you would force him to do something dangerous for a moment.

You rolled your eyes a bit at his dramatic assumption, letting your fingers lace through his light brown hair as you looked up at him. “No, I’m not,” you promised him, leaning up on the tips of your toes to press a quick kiss to the end of his nose.

His face scrunched up a bit into a teasing frown at the odd sign of affection, shifting his weight a bit while his hands traveled up the bottom hem of your t-shirt so his fingers could trace along your skin. “Alright, no airplane. What did you have in mind, then?” he asked, chewing on the inside of his cheek as he looked down at you.

You silently noted the way his pupils grew nearly twice their size when he looked at you.

You shrugged, tucking a few loose strands of hair behind your ear. “I was thinking just a simple Q&A video…” you began, your voice trailing off as you second-guessed the rest of your idea for the bi-weekly video you planned to execute with Matthew.

He raised an eyebrow slightly as he saw you hesitate, folding his arms across his chest with a soft huff out of his nose. “And what? I know there’s something else there,” he asked. You were notorious for having more than one element to your videos, so he knew you wouldn’t settle for just sitting in the spare room you converted to your shooting room and read off random questions with him for thirty minutes. Besides, you both knew he would get antsy and want to do something with his hands. He was restless all the time, and you would need a way to keep him busy.

“I was thinking… I could have you do my makeup while we answered the questions?” you suggested to him, though it came out sounding more like a question than anything. You watched nervously as his brows furrowed together as he thought it over before smiling brightly. He wrapped his arms tightly around you before pressing a soft kiss to the top of your head with a hum.

“I think it sounds like a great idea, bunny,” he said, swaying the two of you back and forth for a moment as he hugged you. You rested your head against his chest with a smile, happy you had finally convinced him to join you for a project of your own.

“I’m glad you think so,” you said, pulling away as you looked up at him. His features from your point of view were shadowy, yet still very definitive. He really didn’t have any bad angles, in your eyes.

He leaned down with a grin before pressing a few soft kisses all over your face, his short stubble tickling your cheeks. You giggled softly at the sensation as you pulled away, hiding your face in his shoulder. You heard his soft chuckle as you checked the time on your phone, shoving it into your back pocket before grabbing his wrist and pulling him towards the stairs of your shared home.

“Come on, I need to at least show you what goes where so you don’t completely ruin my makeup,” you teased him with a smile, looking back at him over your shoulder to see a smile on his lips that matched your own.

The next morning, you tweeted out for people to tweet you and Matthew questions for the upcoming video. The two of you spent the next day choosing the questions you were going to answer, writing down the username of the person who asked it and the actual question they had for you.

You came to a compromise when you picked out the questions: the two of you would pick five together, and each of you would individually pick out five. You thought it would be fun to see what kinds of questions he would pick out for the video, and you found a few that you thought would at least earn a laugh from him.

He thought it would be a good idea to take the questions and put them on pieces of paper, cut them up, and pick them at random from a hat. He hardly gave you time to agree before he began to write down the questions in his chicken scratch onto ripped up pieces of yellow legal paper.

After you had all of the questions in order, he helped you set up the spare room on the second floor so you could film the next day. He helped you hang up the pale blue sheet you usually had for the backgrounds for your videos, and dragged the coffee table upstairs so you could have a place to put all of your makeup. You got some foldable chairs you kept in one of the junk closets along with seasonal decorations and items that needed to go to the thrift store, setting them up across from his camera (that he insisted on using) so they were in the line of sight. It took you much longer than it should have to set up the shot, but you didn’t expect anything less from your director boyfriend.

Since you didn’t finish setting up the room until about 9:45, you decided you would just film the next day.

Matthew insisted on having a late night snack of a pint of ice cream - one for each of you, of course. You quickly found out he was just trying to figure out which questions you had picked out. You two bickered back and forth for what felt like hours as he tried to figure out which ones you wanted to surprise him with.

“Did you choose the one that asked about how the sex is?”

“Jesus, Gube! No, I didn't. Why, did you?” you retorted, eating another spoonful of the frozen dessert as you teased him.

He rolled his eyes before shaking his head, his grown out hair shaking with each movement. “No, but I’ll tell you one of the ones I picked if you tell me one of yours, sunshine,” he said, nudging your shoulder with his own as he finished the pint of Ben and Jerry’s ice cream, setting the empty container on the table at the end of the couch, since your coffee table was currently upstairs covered in cosmetics.

You huffed out at his attempts to barter with you, shaking your head as you grabbed the two empty pints before heading off to the kitchen. “That wouldn’t make it much of a surprise then, would it?” you asked him, rinsing out the containers before tossing them in the recycling bin beneath the kitchen sink. You jumped slightly as you felt a pair of long, lanky arms snake around your waist, grinning as his lips tickled against your neck as he kissed your skin softly.

“Just one question, pretty please,” he asked, dragging out the phrase to try and guilt you into giving in. You tutted at his all but frugal attempts to break you, slipping out of his grasp quickly.

“For the last time, nope,” you said, popping the “p” before smacking his ass playfully. You grinned at the shocked expression your actions earned from your boyfriend. “Now come on sweet cheeks, we should get some rest before your big YouTuber debut,” you teased, lacing your hands with his as you walked him up the stairs.

He chuckled a little bit, both at the nickname and your excuse for why you needed to get to bed relatively early. “Whatever you say, sunshine,” he replied, his arm snaking back around your waist as you made your way closer to your shared bedroom.

You would never describe Matthew as one to get camera shy, especially given his career. But as you two got dressed and got ready the next morning, he was pacing your room as he buttoned up one of his patterned short-sleeved shirts.

“Do you think this is a good idea? I feel like this might be a little premature. I don’t even think your audience likes me. Jesus, what if I ruined you by being on your channel?” He voiced every possible thing that could go wrong, redoing the buttons at least three times as he messed them up from his brain being preoccupied.

You stood up from your seat at your vanity, setting down your hairbrush as you made your way to the pacing man. You rested your hands on his upper arms to stop him in his repetitive path, forcing him to look down at you.

“You’ll be fine, bug,” you reassured him, leaning up and kissing his nose softly. “You know they love you already. I promise that you’re going to be great, okay?” you told him, pushing some of his curls out of his eyes as you gave him a bright smile.

You watched as his nervous expression softened as you fed him words of encouragement, letting out a soft sigh before kissing the top of your head. “Okay… okay. Can we do this now? I feel like I’m going to back out of this if we wait any longer,” he asked. You couldn’t help but chuckle at his comment, nodding softly before leading him out of the room and down the hall.

He sat down in one of the seats as you made sure the camera and lighting was alright, pressing the record button before sitting down in your own seat. You grinned over at him, watching as he nervously fidgeted with the Alvin and the Chipmunks hat in his hands that held your questions.

“You ready?” you asked him, tucking a few loose strands of hair behind your ear as you double checked that you had everything. He looked up from the bright red hat that had entranced him before nodding, setting it down on the coffee table before he looked back over to you. You smiled over at him before leaning over and pressing a quick kiss to his cheek. You turned towards the camera a second later, flashing a bright smile as you adjusted the way you sat so you’d be at a better angle.

“Hey guys!” you greeted enthusiastically to the camera, giving a little wave as well. “Welcome back to a new video! Today I have a very special guest with me; my boyfriend, Matthew,” you introduced, glancing over at him with a smile. You watched him adoringly as you watched him give his own little wave, watching his cheeks turn a pale shade of pink.

“Hello!” he said with enthusiasm that rivaled yours, despite his little voice crack in the middle of the word. You grinned a little bit before turning back to the camera, crossing your left leg over your right.

You finished up the intro to the video rather quickly, just explaining what you guys would be doing and thanking everyone for sending in questions. After a few moments you turned back to Matthew, grabbing the red hat from the coffee table. “You ready?” you asked him, smiling as he nodded and began to look through the makeup.

You sifted through the questions to shuffle them up, laughing a bit as you noticed how focused he was on the products in front of him. “What do I even start with?” he asked you, picking up a concealer and a tube of mascara.

“Start wherever you want, bub,” you smiled, leaning over and pressing a quick kiss to his cheek as you unfolded the first question, watching him untwist the cap of the mascara tube.

“Okay, @y/ngoobler asked, ‘How and where did you two meet?’” you said, grinning as he intricately began to apply the black substance to your lashes with a bright smile at the question.

“Can I answer this one?” he asked you in a soft voice. You giggled a bit at his timidness, but nodded quickly before watching his face light up. “Okay, okay, so about five and a half years ago, I went to a panel with my costar, AJ Cook,” he began, his tongue sticking out of the corner of his mouth as he continued to apply the mascara very generously to your already long lashes.

“Y/N was there with a friend of hers, and I met her at one of the photo ops. Then I later saw her back at the hotel we were staying at, and we talked for a while before I asked her out to dinner the next night before I flew back home,” he explained, leaning back a bit as he inspected his work. “Then I just kept asking her out and hoped she didn’t get annoyed with me. It’s worked for five years so far,” he chuckled, twisting the cap back onto the tube of mascara before looking back at you.

“Can I pull the next one?” he asked, grinning a bit as you nodded to him before he mixed the questions up in the hat before pulling the next one.

“Alright, @y/s/ntrash asked, ‘What is your favorite thing about the other?’” he read off, grabbing a random eyeshadow palette off the coffee table along with a rather large eyeshadow brush. “You go first, I need to focus on this,” he murmured to you, dipping the brush into a yellow color. You closed your eyes with a smile, trying to picture the shape he was designing on your eyelid as you thought over your answer.

“My favorite thing about Matthew is… his sense of humor, probably,” you answered, chewing, grinning as you could feel his demeanor change brightly. You knew how self-conscious he could be, especially about anything that involved entertainment, so that probably lifted his spirits a bit.

“My turn?” he asked you, pulling the brush back as he waited for your answer. You opened the eye he wasn’t working on, nodding softly as you noticed his bright smile. “Besides everything, my favorite thing about you is your smile,” he announced to you and to the future audience, kissing you quickly before he gathered more of the eyeshadow on the brush.

You reached down into the hat as you picked the next question, laughing a bit at the way the brush he used tickled your skin with each stroke he made. “Uh, @spencerwreid asked, ‘Y/N, what is your favorite movie of Matthew’s? Matthew, what is your favorite video of Y/N’s?’” You crumpled up the small yellow piece of paper before tossing it to the side, closing your eyes as he moved onto the next lid.

“My favorite movie of his is probably… Hot Air, I think. I loved the cinematography and the coloring, and Lesley reminded me so much of him,” you explained, folding your arms across your chest as you settled back into your chair. “Your turn, bug,” you told him, figuring he was lost in a trance of his work.

“Oh, shit, okay,” he said, pulling away and letting the brush fall onto the table with a clink as you opened your eyes again. “My favorite video is… that vlog you made when you went to Disneyland with a few of the other YouTubers. I don’t remember their names. I think two of them were twins,” he said, sifting through the products to figure out what to do next.

“The Dolan Twins?”

“That’s it!”

You grinned a little bit, leaning over again and pressing a soft kiss to his cheek. “How does it look so far?” you asked him, watching him grab an angled brush before grabbing a neutral eyeshadow palette.

“I can’t tell you, it’ll ruin the surprise,” he said, chuckling as you stuck your tongue out playfully at your boyfriend. He plucked the next question from the hat, carefully unfolding it before he read it aloud. “@queeny/n asked, ‘How long have the two of you been together?’”

“It’ll be five years this August!” you answered enthusiastically, watching as Matthew just smiled brightly at your quick answer.

You grabbed at the hat and picked out a new question as you watched him dip the brush into a light brown shade, humming to yourself as he dragged it along your eyebrow. “Okay, okay, @abbygubler asked, ‘What did you do for your first date?’” you repeated the question, tossing it to the side as you watched Matthew carefully fill in your brows.

“I took Y/N to a Thai restaurant across the street from our hotel, and she had the absolute worst pad thai I’ve ever tasted in my life,” he chuckled at the memory, pulling back for a moment to look at his work and pick another question.

He placed the brush between his teeth for a moment as he unfolded his question, leaning his neck back slightly before playfully spitting the brush back onto the table, earning an eye roll and stifled laugh from you.

“@prentissprincess asks, ‘Why did it take you guys so long to go public?’” He hummed at the question, picking up a bottle of setting spray before shaking it up. “Close your eyes,” he told you, and you obliged before he spritzed the mist over your face.

“Well, I’ll tell you why,” he began, picking up a bottle of foundation as he turned to the camera (probably just for dramatic effect.) “I am fifteen years older than Y/N, and when we told a few friends when we started dating, they weren’t too fond of it, and didn’t find it necessary to hide their feelings from us,” he said, using the pump on the bottle of foundation to scatter drops across your face.

“So, after talking about it for a bit, we decided to just keep it to ourselves for a little while, just so we didn’t have to deal with the media for a little while - should I use the big brush or the egg?” he interrupted himself, holding up both of them as he looked at you. This obviously was much more important to him than the question, which made you smile a bit.

“The sponge would probably be better,” you corrected and informed him, watching him nod before beginning to carefully dab at your face with the beauty blender.

“Okay. Anyway, we just thought it would be best for a bit, and then we got a little more comfortable and just posted about each other, and now I’m in a YouTube video. I think this is going to be the peak of my career,” he joked. You snorted softly at the comment, which only made him smile brightly as he continued to blend out the foundation across your face.

You picked out the next question, careful to not interrupt your boyfriend’s creative process as you unfolded it and read it around his arm. “@mixmatchedmatthew asked, ‘Was it hard to keep your relationship a secret for such a long time?’” You glanced up at Matthew slightly as he picked up a kabuki style brush and a little compact bronzer.

“I don’t think so, no,” you answered, watching him dip the brush into the compact.

“Make a fish face. That’s what you showed me, right?” he instructed. You nodded softly with a grin, sucking in your cheeks as he brushed the darker cosmetic across your sunken cheek. “The hardest part was probably not being able to show her off, but overall, I’ve probably done harder tasks,” he admitted, brushing out the powder across your cheek before moving up to the sides of your forehead and along the bottom of your jaw.

He set down the brush as he finished the one side of your face, reaching over into the hat and picking out the next question for you two to answer.

“Okay, this one is from @y/ndivinity - Why are these usernames so creative? We need better user names,” he commented, taking the brush and working it across the other side of your face. “Anyway, they asked, ‘What are your favorite things to do together?’”

“Oh! I love just sitting around and painting or drawing together. I like just… being creative with you, I guess?” you answered, scrunching up your nose slightly as he began to drag the brush over it.

“My favorite thing to do with you is taking you to the beach, even just for little lazy days,” he said with a smile. You grinned at his answer, pushing yourself out of your seat for a moment to kiss him quickly.

“I thought you didn’t even like the beach?”

“I only like it with you, bunny,” he answered quickly, giving you a quick kiss back before picking up a bottle of concealer.

You smiled at his response, picking out the next question as he started to draw little shapes under your eyes and in the middle of your forehead. “@aestheticmatthew asks, ‘Have you learned anything from each other?’” you read aloud, dropping the paper into your lap as you looked back to your focused boyfriend, who again was trying to decide between whether to use a beauty sponge or a brush to blend the makeup out.

“Use the sponge, ‘Hew,” you told him, watching him nod quickly before dropping the brush and beginning to dab carefully at your skin.

“I’ve learned how to become an up and coming makeup artist from Y/N,” he answered. You laughed a little, before realizing that that was his actual, legitimate answer. You grinned a little bit, leaning up and messing his hair up a bit to tease him.

“I learned not to take everything so seriously,” you answered, uncrossing your legs and stretching them out beneath his chair a bit. He noticed this, and his eyebrows furrowed together in concern.

“Are you okay? Should we take a break for a few minutes?” he asked you, pulling his hand back as (you assumed) he finished blending out the makeup across your face. You shook your head softly, though your heart melted a bit at how much he cared.

“I’m fine, don’t worry. We’re almost done, I’ll make it,” you promised him, smiling a bit as you plucked the next question from the hat. “Okay, uh, @sydney.y/l/n asked, ‘What do you see for your future together?’” You smiled a bit at the question, looking over at Matthew as you finished reading it. He paused his dig through the products as he smiled a bit at the question as well, leaning back in his seat for a moment as he thought.

“We’d probably stay in the haunted treehouse, but I feel like there’d be at least a few kids running around. Maybe married in Las Vegas along the strip, with a honeymoon somewhere tropical or in the mountains for two weeks,” he said, looking up slightly as if he was lost deep in thought.

“Besides that, just growing old and gray together, and I annoy you until one of us dies, or whatever happens when you turn one hundred and four,” he finished with a bright grin, leaning over and kissing your cheek softly. You smiled as he made a bit of a face, realizing he should’ve blended in the concealer a bit more as he wiped at his lips with the back of his hand. “That was gross,” you heard him mutter, which only made you burst into a fit of giggles as he reached for the next question.

You watched his face contort into a confused expression as he read over the question, and you knew at that moment he had picked out one of the questions you were surprising him with.

“Uh… okay, uh, @reidreidreid asked, ‘Is Y/N a sugar baby?’”

You laughed to yourself at the way he timidly read it and at the face he made, watching him hold back his own laughter as he looked forward to the camera. “No, sh-she’s not,” he said, stuttering over stifled chuckles as he pointed at the fairly large lense. “I am actually the sugar baby. She pays for everything, she actually bought the house from me when she moved in,” he said, fully prepared to continue going on a dramatic rant if it weren’t for you laughing at the entire thing. He shot you a playful glare, which only worsened your case of giggles.

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry,” you said, grinning as you pressed your lips together before crossing your legs again. He picked up a blush palette and a fluffy brush as you picked out the next question, smiling as you watched him suck in his lips to hide his own smile that was tugging at the corners of his mouth.

“Alright, @agenty/f/n asked, ‘Do you go on press tours and go to panels with Matthew?’”

“Smile big, I need to do the blush,” he interrupted you before you can answer, grinning a bit before doing just as he said.

“I just started going to them the past three years, after we went public,” you answered through your tightened teeth, watching as the taller man just laughed at the sight. You laughed quietly as he finished applying the pink powder, setting the brush and palette down once he was satisfied with his work.

He grabbed the hat to read out the next question before moving onto the next step of your makeup, humming as he shuffled the three thin remaining pieces of paper before plucking one out. “@penelopexderek asked, ‘What are your favorite quirks about each other?’” He set the paper down as he dug around the lipsticks, giving you time to answer first.

“When he sleeps, he wiggles his feet a bit, like he’s being tickled or something. It’s a lot cuter than it sounds, and it’s funny to just feel him softly kick at me in his sleep,” you said, teasing your boyfriend a bit with your answer. He stuck his tongue out at you at your response, picking up a pink vial of lipstick before uncapping it and twisting up the product.

He carefully began to apply the cosmetic to your lips as he gave his answer. “When she’s editing, Y/N has to be all spread out across our bed, and she has her tongue poking out of her cheek and she has like her Apple Pen stuck behind her ear… it’s just really cute,” he said, causing you to smile a bit as he finished applying the lipstick.

You pick out the second to last question, watching him grab at the setting spray again. He shook up the bottle for the second time today, waiting for you to read the question so he didn’t spray you in the mouth or the eye.

“@68y/n said, ‘Matthew, did Y/N ever visit you at the Criminal Minds set? If so, what’s your favorite memory there?’” You quickly closed your eyes and mouth so he could apply the spray, your eyes screwing just a bit tighter as you felt the cool mist on your skin.

“Yes, she did, actually. Only for the last few seasons, though, and whenever it worked out for her schedule. My favorite memory with her there is probably filming the Unauthorized Documentaries with her.”

“I was only in it for like twenty seconds, babe,” you said, chuckling a bit as he just shrugged.

“Doesn’t make it any less fun,” he replied quickly, grabbing the last question from the hat and reading it. You watched his face light up brightly, looking back up at you before leaning back in his seat and holding the piece of paper out to you.

“You read it.” You raised an eyebrow at his insistence, leaning back in your seat slightly as he smiled. “It’s one of the ones I picked out. You’ll love it, I pinky promise,” he said, holding his large pinky to you.

You smiled a bit, wrapping your pinky around his before taking the piece of paper from him.

“Alright, @jemilymoreid asks…” your voice trailed off as you smiled, reading the question before glancing up at Matthew. He had a wide grin on his face, crossing his arms over his chest proudly as he waited for you to finish the question. “...they asked, ‘Has he given you the screw that was in his knee yet?’”

You smiled up at him, leaning over and pressing a quick kiss to his cheek. “Yes, he has. We still keep it in the fireplace, but he gave it to me for our four year anniversary,” you said with a grin, glancing at him before looking back at the camera. “He said it was his version of a promise ring.”

You checked the time on your phone quickly before looking over at Matthew, smiling a bit. “Can I look at my face yet?” you asked him since you finished the questions. He nodded softly with a matching smile, handing you a handheld mirror before practically sitting on the edge of his seat. His eyes flickered with excitement and pride, wanting you to see what he had spent the morning working so hard on.

You couldn’t help but grin once you saw your reflection. It wasn’t by many people’s standards good, but considering it was his first time doing anything like it, you thought it was great. He looked over at you expectantly, chewing on his bottom lip as he laced his hands together.

“It looks great, buggy,” you said, leaning over and kissing him quickly. You felt him smiling against your lips, obviously happy that you liked it. “I love it,” you told him as you sat back in your seat, his smile stretching across his face at the compliments.

“Really?” he said, his cheeks burning a pink shade that matched the one he brushed onto your face earlier. “I’m really glad you like it,” he beamed, leaning back in his seat as he just looked over at you, admiring his work and you.

You wrapped up the video, reminding the viewers to like, comment, subscribe, and follow your other social media accounts. You gave a wave and blew a kiss to the lens before you stood up and turned off the camera, sighing softly before turning off the lights.

You watched as Matthew slumped back into his seat, like he was holding in his breath the entire time you were filming.

“So, what now?” he asked, running his hands back through his hair as he looked up at you.

“Now, we clean this mess up, then I can start editing,” you said, helping him gather up all of the makeup. You two took everything back to your vanity where you usually kept all of it, sorting it out into their designated drawers as Matthew insisted on taking the coffee table back downstairs.

It didn’t take you very long to clean up the filming room. After you took a couple photos for the cover of the video, you took down the sheet and the camera tripod, folded up the lights, and put everything back where it belonged. In a little under an hour, you wouldn’t have been able to tell you had done anything in the spare bedroom.

You spent the rest of the day beginning to edit your video. It was a bit longer than usual, so you didn’t finish up until about eleven o’clock, only taking breaks to eat and use the bathroom. You rubbed at your eyes tiredly as you closed your laptop, shoving it in the drawer of your bedside table as you heard Matthew come into the room.

“Did you finish it already?” he asked, joining you in the bed before getting comfortable under the thick covers before turning to face you. You nodded softly, running your fingers back through your hair before pulling it back into a low messy bun.

“Yeah, I wanted to get it up tomorrow, so I just finished everything up tonight,” you explained to him, switching off the lamp beside you before cuddling up close to him, resting your head on his chest as you sighed quietly. You hummed contently as you felt his soft hands rubbing circles on your back, kissing the top of your head as he tried to get you to relax and release the tension you held in your body from sitting in one position for so long.

“I’m sure it’s great, angel,” he assured you, settling down into the mattress as he got ready to go to bed with you. “You need some rest so you can stay awake to see everyone’s reactions tomorrow, though,” he added, giving you a small smile in the dark room.

You nodded softly, intertwining your body with his as you tried to get comfortable in your bed. “G’night, baby boy,” you murmured lazily, pressing a soft kiss to his exposed chest, too tired to move your body up to kiss his lips.

“Goodnight, my love,” he whispered quietly back, both of your eyes closing as you let yourselves fall asleep quickly in the dark bedroom.

The next morning, both of you were riddled with nerves. He was worried that all of your followers would think he was annoying, and you were worried that they wouldn’t like the video in general. You always worried about this, but Matthew was the one to calm you down when you watched the video upload slowly to your most popular platform. However, since you both were pacing in front of the laptop screen, worry coursing through your veins, it wasn’t very helpful.

The video uploaded at about noon, and after that, you both decided to close the computer for now. You wanted to wait a little while before you checked how the video was doing, so you two ordered some Chinese food and watched a random movie you found on Amazon Prime.

You two cuddled up on the couch and ate your food as the movie played on, but from the bouncing of his leg and the sound of your heartbeat in your ears, you could tell that it wasn’t a very good distraction. Halfway through the movie he let out a huff and paused it, pulling out his phone and opening the YouTube app.

“Enough people would have seen it by now to give us some feedback, right?”

He opened up your channel and clicked on your most recently uploaded video, smiling as he saw that there were almost three thousand likes in about one hour of being uploaded. He scrolled down to the comment section, chewing on the inside of his cheek as he scrolled through them.

“They’re so cute omg”

“A video with Matthew!!! Finally!!!”

“The perfect couple <3”

“I need a Matthew IMMEDIATELY!”

You only found a handful of negative comments, but the positive ones completely outweighed them. You watched as the tall boy smiled brightly as he read through them, even liking a few of them as he went along.

“They actually like me!” he said excitedly, looking down at you as he spoke. His eyes were lit up like a Christmas tree with happiness, pressing a quick kiss to the top of your head.

“I told you they would, Matty,” you reminded him, curling up to him as you rested your head on his shoulder. He wrapped his arm around you to pull you just a bit closer, reading back through the comments with a grin.

“See, and it’s doing really well, too! Everyone loves the video,” he told you, showing you a few comments that praised the content they had received from you. You hummed in content as you sported a matching smile, glancing up at him before taking his phone and pressing the power button.

“Now that we have that out of the way,” you began, taking the remote from him. “We should probably finish that distraction.”

“I agree,” he said, pressing a few kisses across your face and head as you pressed play, pulling a blanket over the two of you as you tossed both of your phones onto the coffee table. Your attention turned back to the movie, reveling in the warmth of his touch as you let out a relieved sigh, happy that all of your fans and followers loved him almost as much as you do.

Almost.

@darling-doll9 @imsuperawkward

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diminished-fish · 4 years

Text

References for “A Portrait in Synesthesia”

This fic is COMPLETE now, so anyone who might have been hesitant to follow a wip, here you go! The whole synesthetic package, wrapped up with a nice lil bow on top. :3

For those who might have missed the masterpost: the fic was my contribution to the good omens big bang and is a sweeping, canon-compliant romp through history, told in (almost) all original scenes, with lots of nature imagery and T.S. Eliot. Kind of my own cold open, but with way more feelings and flowers. Also the sea. And an emotionally significant comet.

I had the opportunity to throw all of myself at this project and really enjoyed making it an intense focus for a while. In a way, it was an experiment to see how much I was capable of, which as it turns out, is more than I thought! (there’s a lesson here, probably...). Going this deep with the research and worldbuilding is not something I will likely be doing often for fic writing, but since I did with this one, I figured I’d share a bit of the process.

Under the cut are major spoilers for the timeline, story, and historic events in my recent fic, A Portrait in Synesthesia. I had originally planned to post this information in the end notes of the fic, but at some point, the list got way too long and posting it here became the sensible choice. There is a link to this post in the end notes of the fic, so it will be easy to find your way back here if you get to the end and want to know a bit more about the writing and research process.

The Title:

Putting this bit at the top because I don’t know where else to put it: The working title for this fic throughout the entire writing process was “In Synesthesia.” I almost changed the final title in the eleventh hour to “The Still Point of the Turning World” because of what a prevalent theme Eliot became (that line was also slipped into the story three times at important moments — once for each POV character). I also briefly considered “Always, We Were Enough” as a title, since the conversation with Adrielle at the lighthouse kind of... accidentally became the thesis of the whole story, but that was a bit too sappy even for me, a Confirmed Sap.

And while I’ll be questioning my choice of title for the rest of forever (titling things is hard, y’all), I ultimately thought the more descriptive title was best, and wanted to keep the nod to the song that inspired it all.

Speaking of the song... have you listened to it yet?? It’s great, I promise!

youtube

Synesthesia:

This was my research starting point. Before I dug into any of the historical or astronomical research or even started any serious plotting, I started reading about synesthesia, or, as Psychology Today defines it: the neurological condition in which the stimulation of one sensory or cognitive pathway (for example, hearing) leads to automatic, involuntary experiences in a second sensory or cognitive pathway (such as vision).

Full disclosure: I do not have synesthesia. I spent a LOT of time researching it for this fic and did my best to portray it accurately, in spite of the fantastical elements I added. If I’ve overstepped or gotten something wrong and there are any synesthetes out there who would like to talk about it, I am very open to those discussions. The AO3 comments are always open to that, or you can message me/send me an ask here if you would like a less public forum.

I probably read r/Synesthesia in its entirety, but this thread of first-hand accounts was one of the most interesting to me and provided a lot of the inspiration for how I used the emotional synesthesia imagery.

Besides everyone’s favorite research staring point of Wikipedia, this link is one I got from Boston University’s Synesthesia Project, and it is a pretty exhaustive list of research and books, as well as art and poetry about synesthesia. I have also been working my way through The Man Who Mistook His Wife for a Hat and Other Clinical Tales, by Oliver Sacks which is the book that came most frequently recommended to me in my search. It’s an extremely approachable and interesting look at neurological conditions, synesthesia among them.

As it appears in the fic:

In a broad, generalized sense, Aziraphale and Crowley have a few types of synesthesia in this story. Obviously, I gave it a supernatural/celestial twist and a healthy glug of magical realism, but I did try to keep it firmly rooted in the actual condition. The types of synesthesia they have are:

Chromesthesia: they both have this. Sounds, specifically each other’s voices, have a color association

Lexical-gustatory synesthesia/emotion-flavor synesthesia: Aziraphale has this. Words (in this case, emotions, specifically Crowley’s emotional state) have a taste.

Odor-color synesthesia/emotion-odor synesthesia: Crowley has this. Words (again, emotions, specifically Aziraphale’s emotional state) have a smell.

One of the defining characteristics of synesthesia is that it is constant. If a synesthete connects the number 9 with the color blue, for example, then they will always connect them in this way. This was the major difference between real synesthesia and the fantasy synesthesia in this fic. The sensory/emotion connections for Aziraphale and Crowley changed in subtle ways as their relationship evolved through the ages.

The “binding thread” also had nothing to do with synesthesia. That was me wanting to make the spool analogy work for the body swap, baking it into the entire fic because I liked how the imagery fit with the synesthesia, and then leaning into the magic and the soul memory so hard that I fell flat on my face into magical realism. (A True Fact: I have spent a fair amount of time lying on the floor in the past 6 months, shaking my fist at the cute little plot bunny who grew fangs and claws and dragged me down a rabbit hole that ended up being 100k words deep).

Anyway! Research!

Before I get into space and history and flowers... Yes, I admit to absolutely making up some wacky shit about Europa for the sake of fun banter and making a metaphor work. All those pre-Fall scenes on abandoned Earths are 100% a fantasy setting and I exercised the super fun right of a fantasy writer and embraced the worldbuilding (moonbuilding?). I also just thought Crowley would have delighted in tying a moon’s guts in knots, and Aziraphale would have delighted in the idea of whimsy-for-whimsy’s-sake. Please don’t lose sleep over the scientific inaccuracies.

Halley’s comet:

I promise not to bog this down with a billion comet facts, but there were a few particular things about Halley’s comet that had me gasping dramatically about how it’s “A.J. Crowley, but a comet!!” Specifically, it’s orbit and it’s structure.

Halley’s retrograde orbit gives it one of the fastest velocities (relative to Earth) of any object in the solar system. I never explicitly worked the “you go too fast for me” line into the fic because I was trying to do original scenes (this particular story lived between the lines), but... just know that tidbit is there and join me in these emotional dire straits. If you like.

The comet’s structure is what is known as a “rubble pile”, meaning it’s made up of a bunch of smaller rocks held together by gravity (read: a hot god damn mess held together by stubbornness).

As it appears in the fic:

The nucleus of Halley’s comet is shaped like a weird lopsided peanut. In fact, one could almost look at it and say it resembles a contact binary star, if such a thing could be a shriveled, misshapen pile of rubble.

Officially, Halley’s comet might have been recorded as early as 467 BC (a comet was recorded in Greece that year— unclear if it was Halley’s, but the timing and the fact that it was visible to the naked eye suggests that it probably was). This was the year I had Aziraphale making the scroll that causes Crowley’s panic in Athens (390 BC). I like to think that some human, at some point, caught a glimpse of it and tried to bring it to light, only to be written off as a crazed conspiracy theorist.

The apocalyptic depiction of Halley’s comet in chapter 9 (Bithynia) is actually based in fact. The comet made its closest approach to Earth (in human memory) in 837 AD, passing within 5 million kilometers. Its tail stretched halfway across the sky and it appeared as bright as Venus to the naked eye.

1910 Halley’s Comet panic. Bonus: c o m e t p i l l s

Where 1910′s appearance was a spectacular sight and one of the closest approaches on record (coming within 22 million kilometers of Earth), 1986′s was the worst viewing conditions in 2,000 years. The comet passed within 63 million kilometers at its closest approach, and had the sun positioned between it and Earth, making it impossible to see from areas with any amount of light pollution, and almost invisible to all of the northern hemisphere.

Historic events and settings:

Chapter 6 (Ostia): This was one of the chapters that I did a bunch of arguably unnecessary research for, since the history and the meat of the setting faded into the backdrop as the scene itself focused on dialogue and train of thought. The port town of Ostia was incredibly engrossing to read about, and between wikipedia’s ever-branching paths, ostia-antica.org, and ancient history encyclopedia’s entry, it ended up being one of the deeper rabbit holes I went down. My original intent for Aziraphale being in town was as a response to pirates sacking Ostia in 68 BC. I had him stationed there to guard against further attacks as the town rebuilt, and had him lingering because he was swept away by the romanticism of the art and the sea and the constant ebb & flow of people. I never found a way to work this in that didn’t feel super awkward and expository since the chapter was Crowley POV, so it was just left it as background noise.

Chapter 6 (pyramid of Cestius): Beyond being a magistrate of one of the four great religious corporations in ancient Rome (the Septemviri Epulonum), little is known about who Gaius Cestius actually was. As the city expanded, his lavish tomb was absorbed into the city walls (circa 3rd century AD), where it remains what he is remembered for to this day. I took most of my information from here (cross referenced with our lord and savior, Wikipedia) and had a chuckle at this poem by Thomas Hardy.

Chapter 8 (Plague of Justinian): The Yersinia pestis bacterium leaves no indicator on skeletal remains, meaning we rely on written records to track its path through history. The 6th century plague pandemic is the first recorded outbreak of bubonic plague, and for the purpose of our story, a certain distraught chronicler was the one on site, writing that history.

A note/cw: I wrote chapters 8 and 12 in October and November, respectively, and did much of my research for them over the summer. I imagine, given the current covid-19 pandemic, these sources would be less fun to follow up on now. Please be aware that the podcast episodes linked here, and the book cited in the miscellaneous refs section, get into pretty grisly details about illness and pandemics.

Chapters 8 and 12 (bubonic plague/The Black Death): I took a fair amount of my notes on bubonic/pnuemonic plague, specifically it’s path of destruction through Europe in the 14th century, from the two plague episodes of This Podcast Will Kill You. It’s pretty fascinating stuff and the Erins are great hosts, so check it out if you’re into delightful nerds bantering about epidemiology!

Chapter 9 (the death of Peter of Atroa): Peter of Atroa was an abbot whose fame as a miracle-worker landed him in a scandal accusing him of exorcising demons by the power of Beelzebub, rather than God. Theodore the Studite’s letter cleared his name enough to avoid execution, but his reputation didn’t fully recover until after his death in 837 AD, when he was canonized as a saint. Peter and Theodore were tough to find extensive information on without passing through a paywall, so I took these scraps and ran a mile with them.

Chapter 13 (Tlatelolco, the Aztec Empire, the Feast of the Dead): I used this site as the source and starting point on much of my research on the Aztec Empire. And listen… I know it looks like a website for babies, and yes, I’m aware that a lot of the articles are literally written for a pre-teen audience, but it’s also one of the most concise, thorough, well-researched, and — perhaps most importantly — easily-searchable sources I found. Most of the pages cite papers and archaeological journals and I was able to jump to SO many other great sources of information. Mexicolore has my undying love and devotion for making my research process easy and fun and also having lots of pretty pictures.

Most of the physical descriptions for Tenochtitlan and Tlatelolco (surrounding landscape, canals and causeways, chinampas, etc.) started here.

Tenochtitlan and Tlatelolco were independent cities, but shared a border (kind of like a city and a suburb) and the small island on Lake Texcoco (located where present day Mexico City is). Tenochtitlan was the capital city of the Aztec Empire, and besides cross-referencing Mexicorlore, the link in the previous bullet point, and Wikipedia, I got a fair bit of information from these essays.

Tlatelolco’s market was the major hub of trade and commerce, and saw 20-40,000 people trading PER DAY. Research on the market started here.

Chapter 14 (Terschelling and the Brandaris lighthouse): While I strove for historical accuracy as much as possible in this fic, I did take some liberties— especially with the island of Terschelling and the Brandaris lighthouse (yes, it’s real!) circa 1350-1435.

The village of Brandarius is based on present day West Terschelling— a settlement founded as a direct result of the lighthouse. In the middle ages, both the village and the lighthouse were named after Saint Brandarius (or Brendan of Clonfert: ‘The Navigator’, ‘The Voyager’, ‘The Anchorite’, ‘The Bold’; patron saint of divers, mariners, and travellers). It’s still a relatively small village today, and it was a surprisingly difficult task to find historical records for Brandarius/West Terschelling dating back to the 14th century that say much beyond “it existed.” I loosely based the village off information found here, and named it “Brandarius” instead of “West Terschelling” based on the information found here.

The original lighthouse was built in 1323, destroyed by the sea in 1570, and rebuilt in 1594. Since there were no records (that I could find) of what the original lighthouse looked like, I loosely based the height and floor plan on the current tower, and made up everything everything else about the interior. The interior was based on information about other live-in lighthouses, specifically this one which is roughly the same height as the Brandaris.

The present day Brandaris lighthouse sits directly in the middle of West Terschelling. For the sake of that sweet Self-Imposed Exile + Cryptid Lighthouse Keeper drama, I took the liberty of making my fictional village of Brandarius teeny tiny and setting it slightly apart from the lighthouse.

Miscellaneous references:

In addition to the podcast, details about plague in chapters 8 and 12 were gleaned from the book The Great Mortality by John Kelly. It’s a cool read if you’re into nonfiction that reads like fiction, but does have some rather graphic passages so proceed with caution.

Yaretzi’s maquizcóatl/Aziraphale’s memento. To clarify, they were NOT the same item. I pictured Aziraphale cherishing the memory of the day by the lake with Yaretzi so much, that once he acquired the bookshop and had a place for all his kitsch, he hunted down a bad luck dragon of his own.

Here is the Aztec creation story about sun cycles and Earth’s rebirths that Yaretzi told Aziraphale. Another version of it.

In the scene in Mexico where Aziraphale briefly remembers, I used an analogy about a moment that hovers and flits away as “quick as a hummingbird.” Besides just liking the words, this was a nod to the legend of the cempasuchil flower. I originally had Yaretzi telling Aziraphale that story too, but the chapter was just way too long and something had to go.

In my very first outline, I had Aziraphale’s grief and personal growth chapter taking place at a Día de Muertos festival in Mexico. When the plot and the timeline finally got ironed out and I realized only half of that story was going to take place on Earth, I ended up focusing on Aziraphale’s brief relationship with Yaretzi instead of the festival itself (she was always the important bit). I also found myself married to the idea of that chapter happening in the 14th and 15th centuries, which meant the scenes in Mexico take place before Spain invaded and the festival was based solely on its Aztec roots. Because the plot shifted in this way, a lot of research went on behind the scenes that never made it into the fic, but for anyone interested in the Aztec Feast of the Dead, Mexicolore was my starting place again. From there, I found my way to reading about Mictecacíhuatl, the Aztec goddess of death, who was the main focus of the festival.

This isn’t research, but it might interest, like… three of you, so here you go. The scenes in Heaven (Aziraphale’s solo chapter in general tbh) were hard to write. One of those walls you hit with writing where you kick and punch and bang your head against it for months (literal months, I started wrestling with it in August and it didn’t come together until the end of January) but can’t seem to make any breakthroughs. Inspiration truly comes from unexpected places though, and when @gottagobuycheese sent me this Gregorian chant generator it actually… worked? I cranked that hum slider up to 100 and left it there for a few days (to the chagrin of my spouse) and lo— Zophiel.

There’s a cool legend about Saint Brendan of Clonfert’s sea-faring journey in search of the Garden of Eden that has nothing to do with this fic beyond being neat parallel. If that happens to be anyone’s cup of tea, the story is here. The tl;dr version is here. My original vision for the lighthouse included carved whales (St Brendan’s attribute) over the front door, and images from this story (the island of sheep, the Christmas island, the paradise island of birds) drawn on the walls of one of the bedrooms used by previous keepers’ children. Continuing the theme of “how stories echo” if you will. It felt really awkward and out of place once I wrote it in though, and that chapter was already so long once I got through all the plot bits I wanted, so it was left on the cutting room floor.

Speaking of taking liberties with the 14th century, I did fudge the timing a bit on the art created by Crowley and Adrielle. Drawings, especially pencil sketches, have their historical roots in the late 15th century, and I’m chalking this one up to the fantastical setting of the Good Omens universe. In a fantasy world where angels and demons walk among us and the earth is literally 6,000 years old, I feel like inventing pencils 100 years early is small potatoes. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

This is the edition of A Midsummer Night’s Dream that Crowley nicked in Norwich. There are some really wonderful illustrations and scans of full pages under that link. I may or may not have lost a few hours down that research rabbit hole for a few throwaway lines (no regrets, I fall like Crowley).

One last rabbit hole...

I saved this bit for the end of the post since it’s not really research and I don’t know how interested people will be in this kind of thing. Also... this is a lot more emotional and personal than the historical aspects of the fic. This is just what I was feeling and thinking while I was writing, and this story is absolutely the kind of thing I expect everyone to take something different away from. If you read the fic, took your own meaning from it, and want to keep that meaning without me tarnishing it by babbling about symbolism (first of all, high five, I love you, thank you for hanging out with me and my stories), then feel free to skip the rest of this post. <3

But! For anyone who wants to know more about what I had in mind with the flowers and nature metaphors I worked into the story, read on!

The tag “it’s an OT3 where Earth is the third” is something I really worked to pull to center stage. In my mind, Earth was a fully formed character who also spent the pre-Fall storyline being jerked around by God and having its memory wiped. It experienced transformations, pain, heartbreak, joy, and love just like Aziraphale and Crowley did, and I wrote it as falling in love with the two of them over the course of the Earth Project, then remaining very much in love for the entirety of iteration 23 (the current iteration). “Memories that are buried in places deeper than the mind” referred to the soul imprints being formed, but also Earth’s buried memories— seeping through the cracks to connect them via synesthesia in emotionally charged moments, allowing them to find each other from orbit in iterations 20 and 21 (music and the sea), and pulling them together in moments of distress like Constantinople and Barcelona.

In the vein of “Earth as a character,” I used plants (mainly flowers), topography, and weather as Earth’s “voice” in the grief chapters when Crowley and Aziraphale were separated from each other and going through their individual arcs. I’m not sure it technically counts as flower language, since all the flowers featured in the fic were wild and growing in nature, but (almost) all of them served a metaphorical purpose.

Flowers:

Jasmine (for the moon): Aziraphale’s flower. Love, beauty, sensuality, good luck, purity. The rational hedonist.

Marigolds (for the sun): Crowley’s flower. Grief and remembrance of the dead, lost love, the fragility of life, creativity, winning the affections of someone through hard work. The fallen artist.

Purple Hyacinth: Earth’s flower. Regret, sorrow, a desire for forgiveness. The witness. These were the wildflowers that grew in the orchard/vineyard on the penultimate Earth, where Aziraphale and Crowley managed to work out the differences they couldn’t by the sea. Hyacinths are also the hazy images they would see in those moments of vulnerability, compassion, and compromise.

A fun aside! In very early drafts, the placeholder name I was using for angel Crowley was Jacinto, which is a Spanish/Portuguese name meaning “Hyacinth.” It was meant to be a reference to both the flower and the Greek myth of Apollo and Hyacinth, but my brain absolutely could not disconnect it from Manny Jacinto (and kept insisting on imagining Crowley calling Aziraphale homie and calling everything dope). Eventually I leaned into the Latin and landed on Joriel, then attached my banner to the Achilles and Patroclus myth instead of Apollo and Hyacinth, but the name Jacinto still makes me think of starmakers.

Honeysuckle & morning glory, climbing the oak tree: Aziraphale + Crowley + Earth. Seen in chapter 10, when Aziraphale and Crowley shake hands on the Arrangement. Two plants whose vines grow in opposing spirals. In nature, they have a symbiotic relationship, twining around each other in order to climb trees, walls, and fences, allowing both of them to grow higher than they could alone.

Or: local woman sees this tweet, hasn’t known peace since.

The deasilwise / widdershins (clockwise / anticlockwise) thing got sprinkled throughout the story, with deasilwise being the “angel direction” and widdershins being the “demon direction.” Halley’s comet, with its backwards orbit, orbits the sun deasilwise, even after Crowley becomes widdershins.

Amaranth: Immortality, unfading affection, finding beauty in inaccessible places.

The garden in the dunes and Petya’s travelling garden:

Where Aziraphale took a methodical, Kubler-Ross approach to dealing with loss, Crowley’s process was meandering and chaotic. The garden in the dunes was where it all came to a head— his way of throwing all of his emotions on the ground like a big jumbled pile of pick-up sticks, then slowly sorting through them and putting himself back together. There was a whole lot of Earth/flower speech going on in those scenes.

With the exception of zinnias, the garden was made up of perennials or self-sowing flowers. This happened “off-screen” as I could never find a decent way to work it in, but... the zinnias which Crowley bullied into being perennials returned to being annuals and died off after he left Terschelling and sometimes I still cry in the shower about it.

Zinnias: Adrielle’s flower. Endurance, lasting friendship (especially friendships lasting through absence), goodness, daily remembrance. This one is also a small self-indulgence on my part since Adrielle was something of a self-insert. My mother loves zinnias and, growing up, our house was absolutely surrounded by them in the summer. Anywhere there was a free patch of dirt, Mom planted zinnias. They’re a scrappy, weird looking flower that doesn’t have a smell and a lot of people find rather ugly... and I love them with my entire heart. There is no flower on this earth that fills me with more whimsy, nostalgia, or childlike contentment. Also butterflies love them.

Chamomile: Patience. Fresh chamomile flowers are very aromatic and smell like apples.

Daisies: Transformation. Also simplicity, loyalty, and new beginnings.

Poppies: Restful sleep or recovery, peace in death, remembrance.

Tulips: Each tulip color has its own meaning, but the most common thing they symbolize is deep love. That said, I mainly chose this one for their prevalence in the Netherlands, as well as being very colorful perennials.

Pansies: The love or admiration that one person holds for another, free thinking, remembrance.

Lily of the valley: Rebirth, the return of happiness. They also have a very strong, very sweet smell and can grow in cool climates. These were the main reasons I chose it, rather than any of the religious connotations.

Lavender: Silence, devotion, serenity, grace.

Orchids: There’s... actually no deep symbolism with this one. Nothing intended anyway. Orchids, lavender, and cranberries are the dominant native plants on the island of Terschelling. I thought they’d be pretty in the dunes.

I am also a music-must-be-playing-at-all-times kind of person and I came out the other end of this project with FIFTEEN (15) playlists. Some of them are all instrumental playlists that I used to set the mood while I wrote certain scenes/segments, others are lyrical and tell a story or helped me sort out the story, some chapters got entire playlists all to themselves (looking at you, 14th century). The main playlists are linked in the notes on AO3, but I may collect them all in a tumblr post at some point if there’s an interest.

This entire project was an enormous labor of love that took up pretty much all of my free time for six months. So, if you read this far... thank you for coming on such a long journey with me!! Truly, deeply, and from every corner of my heart, thank you for reading. <3

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mrwinterr · 5 years

Text

The Consequence [3]

Series Masterlist || Main Masterlist

Pairing: Charles Blackwood x Female Reader

Summary: The reader is in search of Charles Blackwood as he’s been missing for several days and not once considering the warning that no good ever comes from being associated with a Blackwood.

Warnings: We Have Always Lived in the Castle spoilers (book and film). Smut (unprotected sex, vaginal fingering, oral [male and female receiving], cum stuff - yeah, I said that) and a swear starts below the cut. I don’t have to remind y’all this is semi/non-canon, right? We all know the kind of character Charles Blackwood is, but for fanfic purposes, I had to make him this way without completely tarnishing his other traits.

Title Inspiration: “The Consequence” by You Me At Six

Disclaimer: There are characters, dialogue and references from the actual book and film, We Have Always Lived in the Castle. They belong to the author and I take no credit for any of these elements.

A/N: As of this post, I’ve completed transferring what little of a masterlist I had to begin with on this new account. There’s three more parts to this series left. I honestly can’t tell you when they’re going to drop. They will regardless if anyone is still keeping up with this.

P R E S E N T

On the way to the Blackwood house, you stopped at a rest area and were able to call your friend as promised. She was relieved to hear back from you, but you were kind of skeptic as to how much everyone else seemed to know about your fiancé’s past than you did. You recounted part of the events that had taken place at Stella’s, just briefly telling her about how much this town despised the Blackwoods. Charles never liked to talk about his family other than how his father was strict and had cut ties with his relatives. You needed clarity and that could only be provided by the man himself.

“Did you know about the Blackwood murder?” You asked your friend quietly over the phone and making sure no one was eavesdropping. This town now had you a bit self-conscious when talking freely of the Blackwood family. She reluctantly sighed and admitted to having heard of it. When you asked why she had never once mentioned that fact about Charles’ background during the early days of your relationship, she responded with how it wasn’t in her place and that Charles never spoke to her about it, believing it may have just all been gossip, which people seem to be really, really good at, and besides, the accused suspect was acquitted.

Charles was as independent as he could be before his father, the only other remaining member in his household, passed away. You had met the patriarch a few times and he intimidated the hell out of you. If you thought your dad was bad, Arthur Blackwood was on another level of discipline. He praised Charles for finding a “pretty one” yet questioned your effectiveness as a wife. While Charles told you not to listen to him, it still bothered you because you’ve heard that kind of talk your whole life from your own father. They made you believe to that you had to be the best damn housewife you could be. You didn’t mind having to fend for yourself at times and you had the basics covered but you didn’t believe you were to live a life full of housework and Charles never chastised you about it. Charles was good to you. How both your fathers were wrong.

After speaking with your friend, who tried to convince you to come back home once more, you soon found a road to follow up the hill to travel on. You began to hear chanting and it sounded like children, so the closer you got the more audible it became, and it was definitely children. Deciding to follow it, you soon found yourself staring at a big house, the top half black and destroyed, confirming the house fire you learned about today. This was the Blackwood house.

The children’s voices broke your gaze from the castle and you watched as a group of kids throw random objects at the door shouting, “Merricat,” over and over, along with a few awful stuff like, “you should’ve burned with the rest of your things,” “I bet you like to eat babies,” and more to provoke someone or something to come out. When did kids learn to be so awful at a young age? This town was a real piece of work, you thought to yourself.

You continued to stare as one of the kids started up the steps of the house now resorting to name calling. As soon as an explicit word spewed out of an older kid’s mouth, you had enough. You weren’t sure the kind of people you were about to defend exactly but surely these kids were trespassing and harassing the inhabitants for no real reason other than for their own amusement.

Setting your suitcase down, you walked towards the kids and spoke, “Hey, that’s enough! What did those girls ever do to you? Didn’t your parents ever teach you bullying is wrong?” Their heads turned to you fast and soon you found yourself being a target of their ridicule, now calling you a fellow witch but as you paid no mind to their jeers, they went back to calling out to Merricat.

Then the tumblers of the door started to echo, signifying that someone was coming out. One of the doors pulled open revealing a teenaged girl with a blank expression on her face, clearly unmoved by the teasing. The children squealed in fear, not prepared to face the subject of their torment. They tripped over their own feet trying to flee the area as soon as they could while also hastily apologizing for their nasty behavior.

None of them seemed to remember you standing nearby watching the whole thing as they scattered and disappeared from view. You turned to look back at the front door, still open and the young girl unfazed, but now staring intently at you. You stared back for a few seconds before speaking, “hello,” you greeted with a small wave to her. You were met with no response, so you kept speaking, “do they do that often?” you asked referring to the malicious children, but she still stared at you. “I’m sorry that you have to go through that. I’m sure none of that is true,” but what did you know other than this girl was potentially related to Charles and you needed to gain her trust to get answers, right? It was wrong but you had to do whatever you could to find Charles, even if it meant manipulation.

Proceeding with caution, you decided to continue, “you must be Merricat,” you gathered that much from the children’s bullying and when she still hadn’t moved, you cautiously began to take a few steps forward, only for her to quickly shut the door close. You had barely made it to the steps when you begged for her to wait and hear you out. You knocked on the door and decided to talk through it, hoping she or someone else would hear you.

“I apologize for intruding on your property. I can assure you I mean no harm, but I couldn’t standby as I heard those children shout those nasty things.” Surely, she had to have still been standing nearby inside, so you continued, hoping to coax someone to come out, “I can’t even begin to understand how children can learn to be so rotten at a young age and let alone their parents condone that behavior.” After a few seconds, you swore you faintly heard a creak in a step from inside; someone was listening to you. You proceeded to tell them your name and posed as a wanderer passing by. Now sitting on the steps of the house, you stared at the damaged furniture scattered in front of the house. It’s a shame to see it all destroyed. You almost let Charles’ name slip from your lips when you recalled how their families had a falling out, so perhaps it was best to not mention Charles just yet. You weren’t even sure if he’d been this way already, you couldn’t take the townspeople word for anything that much you learned.

The door opened just a crack and you quickly turned to your side. You couldn’t see anyone just yet until it opened wider, so you began to stand up from your sitting position. Soon, you were met with a different woman, who seemed to be around your age. She looked pristine with her brown hair up, bright blue eyes and in a white, makeshift dress that you mentally applauded her for being creative with on the fabric. Her clothes must’ve burned in the fire. You noticed the younger one, the one you were having a staring contest with earlier, stood close behind. The woman offered you a small smile, which you returned, and just like that you knew your plan had worked.

The woman introduced herself to you as Constance Blackwood and her younger sister Mary Katherine or Merricat. She explained how she overheard you trying your best to defend them from the children outside and your story. You properly reintroduced yourself to the two of them, Constance shaking your hand and Merricat staring at it. She made you a little nervous, but you knew it was because you were a stranger. You probably would be suspicious too if you were shut out and casted away from society for who knows how long. Social skills weren’t exactly going to be on the top of the personality trait for a person of such. She would be one that would take more effort to ease up to. Constance noticed your suitcase by your feet and your tired eyes. You didn’t even realize how tired you must’ve looked within the last two days of travel. She invited you in much to the dismay of the younger Blackwood as you could tell from her body language. Her face was still unnerved, but you could still sense her coldness.

Constance apologized for the state of their home and you couldn’t believe she even had the audacity to when you knew the fire was an unfortunate event. To lose most of everything one owned and having to rebuild took a lot on a person and you praised the two for their high spirits. While she warned there wasn’t much to work with of the house being in its current condition, she offered you a spot until you figured where you should head to next. It was a very kind gesture of someone to make to a complete stranger, but she must’ve really been appreciative of your actions from earlier. She was definitely one you could work with.

You mentioned how you were no stranger to bullying and teasing from where you came from. You were picked on during your childhood because you didn’t like to partake in other kids’ version of fun, teachers weren’t that helpful to your cause and added on with the mental abuse your father gave you your whole life. You didn’t know how you managed to hold your ground and keep it up until you met the one person who’d changed your life.

P A S T

Growing up you frequented the library quite a lot, then the moment you got your own notebook and filled it up, you realized you had a thing for writing. You enjoyed documenting and writing short stories. It consumed a lot of your time. You were in your own little world and you were fine with it because it made you happy, but as it turned out, that didn’t mean it made those around you happy. If you didn’t hear it from your parents, who were puzzled that their eldest child wasn’t finding herself a nice, young man or honing up on household skills, then you heard it from concerned teachers because you weren’t socializing enough. You weren’t hurting anybody, but they were hurting you and one day you just had enough.

During another lecture from your father, he actually laughed at the idea of you making a career out of writing. The lack of support really hurt coming from your own flesh and blood. He compared you to the other model kids and the difference in compliancy between you and your younger siblings. You needed to learn your place in society apparently.

You didn’t know exactly where to run off to, but you went as far as your feet could take you from the village without deterring off too far. You plopped down on a curb and were too exhausted to be alarmed when a stranger soon stood next to you. He crouched down to your level and asked what was wrong. You didn’t respond, mind too clouded with frustration, you didn’t even look at him. Maybe he’d go away.

“I’m not leaving until I know you’re going to be ok,” he spoke up.

Great, you thought to yourself, “I’m ok,” you said unconvincingly.

“Are you really? You wanna talk about it? It could help,” he suggested.

You sighed loudly, still not looking in his direction, “if I tell you, will you finally leave?”

“Anything you want,” he affirmed.

“Fine. Family drama. There. Goodbye,” you kept it short, but he made no movement to leave, “you said you’d leave if I told you. Why are you still here?”

“You didn’t really tell me anything,” he replied.

“Why do you even care?” You pushed.

“I don’t know. I’m drawn to you I guess,” he said.

“You don’t know me,” you stated.

“True, but I’d like to.”

“Why?”

“You’re quite inquisitive, aren’t you?” He said and you could almost feel him smirking.

“I’ve been told that my whole life,” you said as if that’s a real bad thing.

“I like that.”

“Well, you’d the be the first.”

“I’m Charles,” he introduced himself. When you finally turned to look at him, you paused before going to do the same. He was gorgeous. He gave you a smile, his blue eyes swirled, and hair infused with a lighter shade, in contrast to the natural dark brown, highlighted the front end and top of his fluffy hair. Where has he been your whole life?

When you gathered the sense to tell him your name, you decided you had nothing to lose and tell him what was troubling you. You told him about your aspirations, the lack of support you’ve been receiving lately and that you were feeling increasingly discouraged each day about chasing that dream caused by your own father. You told him that your whole life, you had been brought up to become a proper housewife and that your dream wasn’t going to provide for you, that you needed a man. You told him that the very thought and vision of your life made you more sad than angry.

He listened to every single thing. He didn’t judge you. He didn’t laugh or argue against you as you confined in him. He did tell you that you were capable of creating your own future. You could take all that you’d been shoved to learn and use it towards your own goals. If your own family wasn’t going to support you, then they were going to have to deal with it. You needed to start doing things for you. Charles gave you a sense of hope and he enlightened a whole new vision for you.

“Just know, you’re not your parents…you’re you,” he gave one last advice and you didn’t even realize you’d cracked a tiny small then he muttered quietly, almost to himself, but you still heard it, “wow, you’re so pretty.” After he regained composure, he encouraged you to continue writing and that he’d love to read your work if you’d let him. You felt weak because you felt you could dissolve right there in front of him and bare your soul written in your notebooks for him.

The two of you spent the whole day getting to know about each other. It was a slight stab when you discovered he didn’t live within your village, but he wasn’t based pretty far. He frequented this village for business purposes and nothing more, but you’d give him another reason to. He’d just returned from a trip in Europe, which enthralled you as he spoke of all the sights he saw. You hated to admit it then, but you were drawn to him too.

Not much had changed at home. You’ve been seeing Charles for a few months now, as much as you could when he visited your village. His business here was long over with, but he came back to see you. This kind of relationship with someone was all new to you. You never entertained the thought of being personal or intimate with anyone because finding a man wasn’t on the top of your list. With Charles, it was easy to go with the flow and besides how could you say no to him? You picked up on the trait that he had a way with words and as a result could be very persuasive. It seemed to rub off on you as you were able to escape your homelife easily as often as you had been, which is how you found yourself in a private room of a motel that Charles was a regular at while he visited you.

You both had returned from a nice dinner and a night out at the dance hall, where you didn’t realize how much fun dancing was. There was always something new with him. You sat at the foot of the bed and watched him walk around the small room. He was leaving to go back home tomorrow, and you both wanted tonight to be special.

He sat next to you, facing you, and it was unspoken but there was full consent as your eyes shone with such eagerness, he slowly leaned in to kiss you. The kiss started slow, a hand grasped the back of your neck to deepen and keep your lips locked as you started to lean back and lie on the bed, dragging him down with you. He pulled your body up to the center of the bed with little effort before getting on top of you. As he braced himself with one arm, his other hand ran down your throat, cupped your breast eliciting the first of many noises from you that night. When he gave it a light squeeze you gasped at how it felt, providing an opening for him to slip his tongue in your mouth.

You’d both made out enough times and you knew it worked Charles up judging by the hardness that would rut against your lower region. By now, the kisses became more feral, he had to detach his lips from you for some air. He looked into your eyes, cradled the side of your face again, his thumb grazing your cheek gently, “I want you. I want you so bad, baby,” he pleaded.

You stared at him for a few seconds as you fought yourself internally. This was going to be your first time. What if it ruined everything? You knew it was coming. You wanted to please him but what if you’d fail miserably? “Charles,” you started and wrapped your fingers around his wrist then voiced how you’d never done anything like this with anyone. He assured you that you couldn’t do anything wrong to him. It wasn’t enough of a confidence booster, but you felt compelled to please him. His hips ground into yours and your body answered for you by thrusting your own upwards to meet his.

He whined burying his face in your neck, “I promise we can stop whenever you want. You just say the word,” he said breathlessly against your throat. You brought his face back up to yours and reconnected your lips. Your dress had ridden up from his hips’ constant gyrations, giving Charles less of a hassle to touch your legs. His large hands slipped underneath your panties from the waistband to grope at your backside then snuck back out to start running them up and down your thighs, reveling in the soft skin. He gently massaged the inner parts of your thighs before his fingers started testing the waters at your clothed core. Your eyes popped open when you felt him push aside the material and his fingers starting to probe your folds and feel the wetness pooling. He must’ve sensed the sudden stiffness of your body as he withdrew his fingers from you. He broke the kiss once more to look at you. He wanted to make sure you were still okay with this. “Do you trust me?” He asked. You nodded, but he shook his head, “no, baby girl, I need to hear you say you want this-“

“I do. I do want this, Charles,” you answered almost too quickly, afraid you’d lose him then and there. You were a little embarrassed for wanting something you didn’t have much experience in, but months of heavy petting wasn’t going to keep you both satisfied much longer. Go big or go home. “I’m going to make you feel so good, you just have to trust me,” he assured you.

“I trust you,” and to prove it, you moved to sit up and remove your dress. His eyes cast down at your chest still confined by your bra. You felt a sense of pride when you caught him biting his bottom lip. His moment of weakness allowed you to take control. You grabbed his hands and placed them back on your breasts. He snapped out of his trance and his hands began to wander behind your back to the clasp of your bra. Once unhooked, bra tossed aside, he lowered his head and his mouth instantly attached itself to a nipple. He paid attention to each and only the increase intake of your breathing and harsh tugs at his hair, were indicators for him to move on.

You watched as he sat up to remove his clothes and the sight of him bare always left you in awe. He reclaimed his position over you and lips with such fervor then started trailing down your body. You picked your head up to see him leave kisses around your abdomen and hips. Your legs spread apart for him instinctively and when Charles hooked his fingers on the hem of your panties, he looked up at you once more only for you to give him a nod. When the last bit of your garments was taken care of, you didn’t realize you were holding your breath until the first bit of contact his mouth made with you. Your head dropped back down, hips bucking involuntarily, as he experimentally flicked the tip of his tongue to get a taste of your arousal. He brought an arm over your hips to keep them buckled down before he began his onslaught.

Charles seemed to love what he sampled; his tongue ran a stripe up your folds before going to suck on your clit. He continued this method until he was sure you were enjoying it and judging by your moans increasing in volume mixed with your ragged breathing, you were. You started to reach a brink you were almost scared of because your body was experiencing a new height of pleasure.

To kick it up a notch, he slowly inserted a finger in you. Your hips jerked once more under the arm, deciding you wanted to feel more, he pushed in another finger, this time the force of your hips bucked up even harder. You subconsciously began massaging your own breasts, wanting to feel pleasure all over. Charles briefly looked up and moaned against you at the sight of you touching your body. He loved the developing sexual confidence you displayed for him. The vibrations of his moans only egged onto the sensation you were feeling. The combined efforts of his tongue and fingers plunging into you soon had your legs quivering and body desperately lifting itself up from the mattress. You let out an embarrassingly loud moan when his fingers curled, brushing the spot to trigger your release. Soon, your pussy clenched tight as you came around his fingers, he was reveling in the juices of your first orgasm, “so good, so sweet,” he uttered while lapping up as much as he could.

Your head was pushed far back into the pillow under your head as you swallowed the lump that formed in your throat from your orgasm. You brought an arm over your eyes, slightly ashamed that you must’ve made a mess on his pretty face and the slight toll it took on your body. You didn’t notice Charles make his way back up to you and when he grabbed your arm to remove it from your face, the sight of his mouth and chin glistening from your arousal had you aching once more. He didn’t think twice when he leaned in to kiss you and you weren’t sure why tasting yourself on his tongue turned you on. With another surge of self-confidence, your hand started to rub the bulge prominent in his boxers. Not that he could see, you blushed at its length and hardness. He took your hand in his and guided it inside to wrap around him, eliminating the thin barrier as he tugged them off fully. Your hands stayed in place, slightly stunned at your actions, “it’s okay, baby, remember you can’t do no wrong,” he tried encouraging you. You moved your hand up and down feeling the soft flesh and ridges of his cock with each stroke. He had occupied himself with leaving tiny bites and marks on your neck as you continued with your movements.

Charles flipped the both of you around suddenly, you now on top straddling him with your hands now planted on his chest. He shifted his hips to get comfortable but doing so only allowed his member to run past your wet pussy. He groaned at the contact and started shamelessly begging, “help me out, gorgeous. I’m begging you,” while slowly starting to rub up against you. Even though you drilled the fact you were inexperienced in his head, you wanted to please him. He had to have sensed your hesitation and took a different approach. He traced a finger along your lips and poked it in your mouth for you to suck and gather some of your saliva before he removed it to rub the wetness on his cock. Charles repeated this notion and the harder you sucked on his finger, the harder it became for him to control himself, “oh my God,” he whined watching your lips wrap around his digit and the feeling of your tongue as he imagined that sensation on his throbbing member. Seeing Charles that weak and drowning in pleasure gave you another confidence boost as you slid your body down his until you were face to face with his dick. You grabbed him and poked your tongue out to lick the tip. When that initial contact was through with, it was easy enough for you to run a longer and broader lick from the base to the tip before engulfing him.

Once you had a good pace set, your cheeks hollowed around him and hands made quick work to occupy the rest that you couldn’t intake.“Fuck, you look so good with my cock stuffed in your mouth,” he stressed when he made eye contact with you. You soon discovered a distinct taste and texture in your mouth as he started oozing precum. One of your hands slipping down to palm his balls, you tried your best to not make a mess as a mix of fluids started to escape your mouth and slide down his cock. It was a work alright, but knowing you were making him feel that good made you feel even better. You could feel your arousal dripping down your thighs. Charles stopped your ministrations the first time you gagged when you took him in too deep; feeling your throat constrict around his cock almost threw him over the edge prematurely.

You pulled away and sat up looking at Charles, awaiting your next move, your eyes shone with unshed tears from the brief lodge of your airway caused by his cock. You were a mess as you wiped at and licked your lips from any excess fluids.

“I don’t believe you,” he said with broken breaths as he lied there trying to collect himself, “I don’t believe that was your first time,” he clarified giving you a devious smile. You let out a small sigh of relief before blushing once more. “Come here, beautiful,” he commanded, and you obediently crawled over next to him. Charles’ body hovered over yours once more, parting your legs to position himself in between and hooked them over his waist. You let out a whine feeling him drag his hard cock against your sopping pussy, coating himself.

“I need to hear you one more time,” he said, lips brushing against yours, “I need to hear you say you want this.”

“I want this. Charles, I want you,” you confirmed, wrapping your arms around his neck.

He slowly pushed in, while paying close attention to your face beginning to contort with the pain of him stretching your walls.

“Baby, you’re gonna have to relax a bit,” he advised once you started to clench, your body’s response to block the pain, you hadn’t even realized you’d pulled him closer to you. He pulled one of your arms away from his neck to look at you before saying, “I promise it’ll feel good,” then pecked your lips. You nodded and tried to keep his promise in mind as you bared through the stinging feeling of him pushing further in. Once he was fully encased in your warmth, he let out a moan, dropping his head in the crook of your neck. You both lied still for a couple of minutes, taking in the feel of absolute closeness. You felt so full because of him and he was warm because of you. “I’m gonna move, ok?” He warned you.

Charles started to pull away slowly then pushed back in a little faster, eliciting a moan out of you. His mouth agape as he stared at you again, the pain mostly erased and replaced with pleasure, your body was growing accustomed to him. You couldn’t stop the moans escaping your mouth with each thrust he made and Charles smirked as he reveled in the fact that he was making you feel that good and he hadn’t even pulled out all the stops but that would have to take some time. One particular thrust had you dragging your nails down his back and yelp, “oh my God,” that was it. Charles let out a groan from the stinging on his back, but he knew. He found it. He hit the spot. He did it again to make sure and this time you thrust back against him.

You were too lost in ecstasy and from the languid kisses he left all over your body; you didn’t see his hand trail down between where your bodies connected. His fingers started to hastily rub circles on your clit. You didn’t know someone could bring so much pleasure to you, but here was Charles doing just that. His name repeatedly spilled from your lips as your body swam through the waves of euphoria from your second orgasm. Feeling your pussy squeeze his cock, he immediately crashed his lips to yours, letting out a throaty moan and unable to pull out, resulted in him filling you with his hot cum. The kisses became sloppy, your hand tugged at his hair, matted with sweat that it started to curl, as the warmth spread all over you. You let out a whine when he finally withdrew himself from you, some of his cum starting to leak out. He couldn’t stop himself from scooping a small amount on his finger and bringing it up to your lips, which you expertly took in and sucked the digit clean.

He marveled at your state of bliss. The way both of your hands grasped at his wrist to hold his hand in place, your eyes closed, moaning at his taste, covered in a sheen of sweat, hair stuck to your forehead and sprawled all over the pillow, chest heaving as you tried to catch your breath. “Damn. You’re perfect. You did so good, baby,” he said almost at a loss for words before kissing and praising you the night away.

Your relationship with Charles only grew deeper and your dad was beginning to get suspicious as to where you were off spending your time and even nights away. It wasn’t until he heard talk of his daughter being seen around town with a suitor. When your dad had confronted you about it, you were almost relieved because you didn’t know how to bring it up. Maybe he would finally get off your back now that you were heading in the “right direction” of becoming a woman of society, whatever bullshit that was. He insisted you invite your new beau over to formally meet him and you were pleased to find Charles having no problem at all with meeting your father. You were reluctant to agree, hoping your father wouldn’t run him out of town.

That night, after preparing and setting up for their first encounter, you saw a shiny, red car from the window. It was a bit puzzling, but when you made it out to the front porch and saw your boyfriend behind the wheel, you shook your head. He always had to show off, but that was a part of him, and you really liked him.

“How’d you manage this?” You asked referring to the new car.

“Baby, I can be very persuasive,” he said placing his hands on your hips to bring you closer.

“Oh, don’t I know it?” You teased before finally greeting him with a kiss. You heard snickers and giggles from the inside of the house and pulled away to shoo your younger siblings away.

Once you made it inside, you were greeted by your parents. Charles smiled brightly at them and you let go of his hand when you noticed how your father stared hard at the both of you. You were his daughter after all. Charles didn’t seem to crack at all under the look and confidently introduced himself with his hand out for your father to shake. If looks could kill, you thought that was the look, the one your father was giving Charles at that moment. He shook Charles’ hand out of sheer courtesy before stalking back to the dining room without another word. You were confused at your dad’s sudden coldness in front of a guest but also because not too long ago, he seemed to entertain the idea of you finding someone and finally meeting that person.

Charles doesn’t show any sign of defeat at all. He knew your dad would’ve most likely not have taken a liking to him. Your dad wasn’t as subtle when he grilled him with unnecessary questions. It went unbothered by Charles. It confused your younger siblings. It somewhat embarrassed your mother. It angered you. When Charles leaves that night with a hushed promise to see you tomorrow, your met with your dad, who is really disappointed that the one man on this planet that you do take interest in is a Blackwood.

“How do you fail to mention that you’re courting a Blackwood?” He demanded once it was just you and your parents.

“What is that supposed to mean?” You were really confused now.

“That boy is bad news. I thought you had better judge of character,” he scolded.

“Charles has been nothing but good to me,” you tried to convince your dad. You looked behind him and the expression on your mom’s face was sympathetic, “Mom?” You asked for her help.

“I’m sorry, honey. It might be best if you stopped seeing Charles,” she advised. You just shook your head in disbelief at the lack of support from your parents, but what was new right? You never seemed to have their support these days.

“I don’t get it,” you said finally voicing how you’ve been feeling less part of the family, “you’re supposed to be my family and be happy for me-“

“We do want you to be happy. You’re just not going to find happiness the longer you stay with him.” Your mother tried to reason.

“I’ve felt nothing but that with him!” You countered, but what success did you ever have with that against your parents?

“You really don’t know,” your dad scoffed at your naivete, “Charles comes from a crazy family with a dark history. No good will ever come out of being with a Blackwood-“

“His family is not him,” you cut your dad off, “and the both of you aren’t me,” you closed this argument and stalked off to your room. That was the first of many times you’d hear your dad warn you about Charles and he’d just hope you’d be wise enough to leave him.

#the consequence #charles blackwood x reader #charles blackwood x y/n #charles blackwood x female reader #charles blackwood x you #charles blackwood imagine #charles blackwood fanfic #charles blackwood fan fiction #charles blackwood #whalitc #we have always lived in the castle #sebastian stan imagine #sebastian stan fanfic #charles blackwood smut #sebastian stan smut #mrwinterr writes #sebastian stan x reader

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carnoshin · 5 years

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Slashers With A Magical Girl S/O

Prompt(s) provided by @galaxy-of-pastels, based off of Puella Magi Madoka Magica. I was in the fandom when I was younger, so excuse the length!!!

((I know the cut won’t work on mobile, yet again, so I’m also gonna tag this as “long post.” soz))

(Also. Side-note that I think is funny: technically, all you need to become a magical “””girl””” is human emotions, so. Technically. These boys could make a wish. Too bad I can’t draw men, this seems like it would be fun to do;;;)

Jason

You probably assume that the famous “Jason Voorhees of Camp Blood” is a witch, so that’s how you end up there. Maybe you still have some hope left in you, maybe you’re trying to claim the territory.

Obviously, you’re surprised when the infamous Jason is... Well, he’s just himself. And he’s surprised when you walk off being gored. It does some serious corruption to your soul gem, but you’ve been through worse-- that’s what being a magical girl is, simple enough: not fun and seriously harming.

((As for the general relationship and the specific questions, lol))

Usually, in the Madoka universe, magical girls do not age unless spurned by their transformation (Godoka seems to be a few years older than usual Madoka, for example. Also, there’s a wish that basically splits someone into two people in the manga: it’s transformative, is what I’m getting at). If you are chronologically an adult and pass for an adult, you probably turned later in your teen years.

Once you make your wish, your body is essentially dead: you’re a ghost possessing your preserved corpse.

Jason relates to that on a certain level, but he’s also vaguely worried about the fact that he is rotting. It becomes a very “monstrous alien or beautiful corpse” situation, if you’re familiar with that saying-- both are psychologically terrifying, but the one people prefer says something about them. That monstrous aspect is part of what drew you two together.

He’s caught off-guard by the idea that you could just. Disappear forever? Only leaving behind destruction and despair? Given the fact that you’re with him, he’s vaguely terrified what your Labyrinth could be like. He wonders if you would hurt him-- he deeply wants you to be able to come back to him, if you ever reach that point of corruption. (And no, he doesn’t care about the consequences.)

You have to leave fairly often to find grief seeds and he insists you leave when he “has to” commit his occasional massacre, in case it corrupts your gem even more.

Technically, only magical girls or kyubey can enter the witch’s labirynth without assistance. Everyone else is affected by either suicidal thoughts or illness. At first, it doesn’t strike him as odd: it’s just a group of teens coming up in the middle of summer, it’s not rare at all. But he finds himself being a bit more reckless than usual-- he’s practically making himself known at this point, no doubt as to whether or not he’s an urban legend.

(I would sincerely hope you don’t bring him into the labirynth: are you trying to get your mans killed?)

Most magical girls can go beyond their fully corrupted gem. (It’s implied that Homura never uses a grief seed after she gets herself set “right,” simply by supressing her sadness.) So if you come back from a fight and you’re particularly quiet, it can be even more stressing on your end when he tries to comfort you-- that release of emotion is what forms a witch, after all. Giving a matter of fact “I almost died” and leaving it at that is your best bet.

If you became a witch, he’d feel so... Guilty? He’d probably be there to watch the grief seed “hatch” and might get caught in the resulting chaos-- emotion is a very strong thing with magical girls, so if you have lots of emotions for him... He could get sucked in. Once you are slain he just. Sits there. In the same place you were when he last saw you. The quiet of the house, the fact that all your things are still there... It just wrecks him.

(Lmao, did you think a Madoka post was gonna be happy...? Nah.)

Bubba

Again, you are probably there in the assumption that a witch is in the area. Most magical girls ditch Kyubey after finding out what he did to them, so you’re left trying to find them on your own-- not impossible, but certainly harder than just following the little rabbit-puppy-cat bastard. Witches do spread around violence-prone areas, so it’s not a terrible stretch of the imagination.

There very well might be a witch in the area. Though witches can move around, if you catch one early it’s likely to be in an abandoned place-- where magical girls tend to hang around. And, sure enough, there are lots of abandoned places around the Sawyer property. It’s not the best place to set up a base camp, however.

You probably wouldn’t be terribly friendly with the Sawyer family altogether-- probably just Bubba: his secret friend who comes by at night to talk with him. His “imaginary” girlfriend, if you will-- his brothers certainly call you that, at least.

Bubba doesn’t quite get all of the stuff around witches and rumors and familiars and all that. He thinks the soul gem is quite pretty: he can sort of see the resemblance between you and it.

He’s the most likely to take off with your soul gem on accident. It’s really pretty and, since it’s yours, he very much sees it as something precious-- not in the fact that it’s literally your soul so much as “this belongs to my lover. I keep it on me to remind me of them.” So you can see why that would be an issue.

There are a few events where he finds a grief seed nearby his house-- witch’s gravitate towards violence and death, so the Sawyer house isn’t an unlikely place for them to go. You frequently tell him to make sure his family is healthy and he starts to be a bit more “doting” around his family than usual, though it makes them upset at him.

He knows what your soul gem looks like. So he recognizes your grief seed immediately. And then he just... Loses time. He “wakes up” thirty minutes later, dangerously close to the woodchipper in the backyard. He remembers that you told him if he ever lost time like that, he should make sure he’s safe-- that his family is safe and relatively health. And after he does, just like you told him to, he remembers where he saw the little silver and black trinket that looked like your soul gem. And it’s just gone.

It becomes a regular part of his daily schedule to check over by the place he would meet you-- you on the opposite side of the fence that denoted the Sawyer property. You never come back, but... He’s certainly keeping his hopes up.

Brahms

The Heelshire mansion is a good place for a base. It’s only a twenty minute drive from a major city; being an older magical girl, you have a type of authority that the other girls succeed to, so there’s very few territorial issues; there’s a hospital ten minutes away; no one ever comes by, so you can do as much magical stuff as you like without worry of being exposed. Etcetera.

Since your magic is so very advanced, as an “adult” magical girl, you probably end up making a kind of... Temporal space to disappear into. This is the main thing that interests Brahms about you: you enter a room-- one that he can see into and enter, if he so pleases-- but you’re never in the room. For a while, he considers that he might be going insane. Or perhaps you’re a ghost-- things he never believed in, especially because most assume he is a ghost.

He becomes terribly interested with you-- not even in a romantic sense, because he does have a kind of fear towards you: he truly thinks you’re a demon or a spectre-- perhaps a ghost from the witch hunts way back when, as you occasionally mention witches when you have a visitor outside the house.

He takes note of a type of creature outside the house that you seem to absolutely hate. He assumes it’s some strange toy, as he can just barely hear it speaking. One day, it mentions that someone else is in the house and before he knows how to react, you’re searching through the house with something shiny in hand. You never find him: he’s not a witch or a magical girl or anything of the sort, so he doesn’t show up on your radar.

When you go to sleep at night, he is so very careful about taking that lovely gem you seem to have. He takes it back to his room and leaves it there for further inspection. For the next two days, you don’t move even once. He even gets so bold as to check your pulse, shake your body to try to wake you. And then he hears that strange creature that you seem to hate speaking to him: he hasn’t the slightest clue how it got into the house, but he listens to it and returns your soul gem. He sits by your bedside waiting for you to wake up. Needless to say, you’re quite frightened when you do and see a man you’ve never seen before watching over you.

He listens very intently about your life as a magical girl. He’s seen you do such strange things. It only takes one single transformation-- to him it seems to only take a single blink, though you do go through the whole process-- to convince him. He’s not terribly afraid of you turning to a witch--- if you’re unhappy with him, it serves you right. (He... Sucks...)

The thing is, he won’t let you leave very often to get grief seeds. You’re always just on the verge of becoming a witch. If you’re lucky, you can convince some of the younger girls to give you “extra” grief seeds. They suggest you run from him-- plenty of them are homeless; it’s a norm for magical girls.

If you do become a witch, it probably happens in the manor. He accosts the girls who came to destroy your labirynth as soon as everything is over-- he’s awake and alert immediately after. The girls aren’t so kind as to give him your grief seed-- you were extremely difficult to beat, so they can’t just let the grief seed grow and destroy once again: you’d only get stronger and more dangerous.

He gets so lonely, so depressed. He doesn’t eat. He hardly sleeps. He becomes a husk of a man. He doesn’t die from grief, however, no. He has to go through the process of grief. All alone.

#jason voorhees x reader #jason vorhees #bubba sawyer #bubba x reader #bubba saywer x reader #brahms heelshire #brahms x reader #brahms heelshire x reader #brahms the boy #long post #you know what's interesting? the day I saw the original post with the questions i had to pick up and put away some lances at work and #immediately got sis puella magica stuck in my head for a good two hours.

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conceitedxglory-blog · 5 years

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Answer 21, Tag 21

Tagged by: @marigoldeneyes WOWOW I LOVE YOU BB THANK U

1. Nicknames: Poe, Poey, Poe-Go, Dweadski, Mon, Moni, and the list goes on. (Rule of thumb, if it starts with a “P” its my nickname).

2. Zodiac Sign: Aries!

3. Height: 5′5″ Inches

4. Hogwarts 🏠: Ravenclaw! (one inch from Gryffindor tho)

5. Last Thing I googled: The spelling and general knowledge on halberdiers. I needed to know for a character I was working on. :3

6. Favourite Musicians: Oh lawd, okay. I love all kinds of music from Britney Spears to Ramstein, I also have a strong liking to classic rock; however, if I had to list some favorite bands and musicians I’d say: Disturbed, Kamelot, Nightwish, Breaking Benjamin, Journey, and I have a weak spot for ELO (Electric Light Orchestra). Also ABBA. Can’t forget ABBA.

7. Song Stuck in My Head: “My Name Is Human” by Highly Suspect

8. Following Now: 30 (which might I add is insane??? I am barely active nowadays and am relatively a new blog??? Wowzers im love all of you).

9. Followers: 31

10. Do I Get Asks?: Whenever I reblog a meme I am shocked with how many people actually send some in and sometimes I get cute lil’ anons. I still love the one with Beauty and the Beast lyrics. :3

11. Amount of 💤?: Fuck, about like....5 or 6 hours I think? Depression often makes it vary.

12. Lucky Number: 10

13. What I’m Wearing: The majority of my clothes are black. I only ever wear a bit of red. BUT if you wanna know exactly what right now: tea pot themed pajamas. :)

14. Dream Job: Honestly............I just wanna make art. Maybe do comics or even just make money off traditional art would be nice, I love painting---especially with watercolor.

15. Dream Trip: travel scares me

16. Favorite Food: I’m kinda struggling with food, but steak fajitas are the bomb dot com.

17. Instruments: I used to play the violin really well until my orchestra teacher (freshmen year) verbally abused me and tried to force me out of the spring concert; unfortunately, I haven’t been able to pick it up since. I wanted to be a singer when I was younger, but I think I’m about as tone deaf as my muse and I was told my voice was really raspy and out of tune so....I kinda dropped playing music and singing all together, which isn’t right and I know I shouldn’t let those experiences get the best of me but...eh. Maybe one day when inspiration strikes, I’ll do it.

18. Languages: English and very broken German.

19. Favorite Song: “The Light” by Disturbed

20. Random Fact: I have always related to Rapunzel as a little girl because I felt trapped. My mom didn’t let me or my brother celebrate Halloween until we were teenagers, I spent the majority of my early years without friends or anywhere outside the house without literally begging to be taken somewhere, and visits to other family members involved one kind of drama or another. I also didn’t cut my hair until I was twelve and the only reason I did was because it was just uh...a little too much to handle. It went past my butt and long strands of brown were literally everywhere. xD

21. Aesthetic: Tarot cards, skulls, red and black, cute lil’ kitties and bunnies, typewriters (always wanted one!), the smell of sage, crystals, fire, witchy things, demons but like...cute ones, contrast between life and death, etc.

Tagging: @magicfordummies, @fadedintheflames, @humortremors, @rebclangcl, @brusquc, @nevivorona, AND surely theres more but....my brain is ehhhhhhhh not working right. Literally if you wanna do it then do it! Also apologies if anyone of you beans I tagged already did it, just kinda---toss this post into the void. Just yeet it. Sacrifice it to Cthulhu. It’s all good and no pressure at all.

#Mun info #(ooc)#(pwofehqo[wehoero[rh this was fun)#(thanks again for tagging me. I give many hugs through the screen)#(I am honestly so happy that peeps still tag me in stuff and want interaction #despite my slow activity)#(you beans are so pure and must be protected)

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eorzean-tale · 5 years

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Prompt #16 Bond

This is part 2 of my lore series, where I try and analyze some of the tidbits of info we got from Encyclopaedia Eorzea, volume II. This series only focuses on the Seeker of the Sun M-tribe lore, particularly four of its characters that were highlighted in the book and shared in the BRPN Discord. For this part, I’m going to look at the bond between a nunh and his tribe.There will be spoilers from the lorebook below the cut, so be warned.

Part 2 M’rahz Nunh

From Encyclopaedia Eorzea, volume II:

“There was a time when I was the weakest of the males in the M Tribe. It wasn’t easy, but through rigorous training, I eventually grew to become the man you see before you.” M’rahz was only three and twenty when he bested his predecessor in a duel and replaced him as nunh, a breeding male. While that was an impressive feat in its own right, the Seeker of the Sun would be the first to acknowledge that the harder part was still to come. In the early days, it seemed as though he could please none of the womenfolk, but pain proved an effective teacher and he quickly honed his sensitivity to the needs of others. Over the next twenty-seven years, he has protected his people as both a husband and a father. A challenging task at the best of times, it was only made more difficult when the Empire invaded two decades ago. With their hunting grounds shrinking and food growing scarcer by the season, many hard decisions had to be made. And the hardest one of all was that which saw his dear friend and fellow nunh, M’aht, leave the village behind. Owing to their history, he harbors a fondness for M’zhet, M’aht’s spirited son.

Let’s talk about his quote first. It seems that Rahz refers refers to his own people as ‘the M Tribe’ and not the Marmot Tribe. The use of the word ‘tribe’ also suggests that they are the only group of Marmots out there. In RP, we often speak of septs, sects, pacts, or whatever else, to indicate that there isn’t just one group of that tribe and everyone can play their Seeker Miqo’te as they like, even if they share the same tribal letter. As this is not done here, one might wonder if all M Tribe Miqo’te can only be from this particular group.

I personally do not think that is the case, and that they used these terms to not confuse people. Not everyone might know that the M stands for the Marmot totem, and not everyone will realize that tribes might have split off into different groups at some point in their history. I would like to see more acknowledgement of these different groups of the same tribe at some point, but I suppose we should be happy about getting any kind of lore about Seekers at this point :P

Note that he also uses the terms ‘males’ and ‘man’, indicating that, yes, some Seekers will refer to men as males. It’s an easy term to pick up if you want to give your character that extra bit of ‘tribal flavour’.

Next: becoming nunh

They then focus on him beating his predecessor in a duel at the tender age of 23 and that that was a pretty impressive feat. So the weakest male managed to climb to the top of the combat ranks at the tender age of 23… That training must have been really rigorous indeed.

It makes me wonder how the runt became the master in such a relatively short amount of time, and if the other tia didn’t train just as hard. It doesn’t seem to be normal to be able to defeat a nunh so early on, as they make a point out of calling it an impressive feat. I suppose they want to show how hard he had to work for it, but personally I wouldn’t have minded it if they had made him a little older.

It’s followed up by this quote:

In the early days, it seemed as though he could please none of the womenfolk, but pain proved an effective teacher and he quickly honed his sensitivity to the needs of others.

Uh, pain? As in.. physical? Did they beat him up? Or did he hurt a lot of the women by just being an insensitive dick? Or did they hurt him? While I like that they emphasize the need for a nunh to be sensitive to the needs of others with this quote, it has some weird implications when you think about it more. Mostly, that apparently the tia of the Marmot tribe don’t receive any sort of training on what is expected of you once you do become nunh. They only focus on training to defeat the current nunh, and supposedly learn the duties that come with it after that. So what happens when a nunh doesn’t learn? It just seems odder and odder to me, the longer I think about it. Like having an archery competition to determine the best huntress of your tribe, and once someone wins, they’ll go on their first actual hunt. The M Tribe could have used a ‘Nunh for dummies’ book back in Rahz’s day.

Luckily for the M Tribe, Rahz learned well:

Over the next twenty-seven years, he has protected his people as both a husband and a father.

Personally, I hate the use of the word husband in this sentence. It’s very confusing as to what it means. I think they might mean in a general sense, as ‘husband to his people’ and not one woman like the term suggests to the average western reader, but that might just be wishful thinking on my part, as that is the better out of two unpleasant options for me. Let me explain.

Husband to one (or multiple) women

If he is literally married to one woman of his tribe, or even several, it would mean he values this person above the others. Even if the marriage is political or symbolic, it means this woman is favoured by this nunh for whatever reason. This level of favouritism might be very difficult in a culture where he literally has to father all the children of the tribe and raises a lot of questions:

Does he live with his wife, or wives?

If not, what is the point of the bonding?

Does that mean he favours his children by this woman?

Do other huntresses or his other children never get jealous?

Of course they would, so how do they deal with that?

Why specifically the term husband, and not something a bit less city-folk-like such as mate for example?

Can tia get married as well?

Can women to other women?

You have to keep in mind that female Miqo’te vastly outnumber the males, so what then happens to the women who are, for lack of a better term, leftover and not inclined towards other women?

Who is his wife, or wives?

What is the ceremony like?

So many questions, and we probably won’t get any answers from SE, so we have to decide for our own tribes. I just hope people do ask themselves these questions, when they next write love-stories for their nunh characters.

What I truly despise about this option though, is that his wife, or wives, aren’t named. It reminds me of DBZ or old Disney, where the spouses were often so ‘background’ that they weren’t even given a name. The huntresses deserve their spotlight as well, dammit :P

Husband to the tribe

I like this option better, but once I started writing down why, I realized it has its fair share of flaws as well. If he is a husband to the tribe, how does that work when he’s defeated by a tia? Is defeating and becoming nunh quite literally tearing a family apart and inserting yourself into it? If that’s the case, then I understand why he had trouble pleasing the women of his tribe at first, as that sounds rather traumatic.

For me, personally, it’s still the better option though. I hope they meant he does husband-like duties, just like he does fatherly duties as mentioned in the same sentence, without him literally being someone's husband. It also makes me wonder what counts as husband-like in Japan, and I even tried to look up if ‘husband’ could mean different things in Japanese, depending on context. The only thing I could find, is that the most common character for husband in Japanese is the same as ‘owner’, or ‘master’. Yikes.

Anyway, enough about this one word, as this wall of text is getting quite long as it is. It’s just interesting to speculate about. The rest of the description talks about difficulties stemming from the invasion of the Empire 20 years ago, with hunting grounds shrinking because of it. I’ll talk about Aht and Zhet in their own posts, so that’s it for me, for now.

If you made it all the way down here, then thank you for reading! If you have your own ideas and speculations about this bit of lore, let me know in the comments below. I’m always eager to discuss people’s interpretations.

#FFxivWrite2018 #ffxiv balmung #final fantasy 14 #ffxiv #seeker of the sun #tribal seeker of the sun #seeker lore #ffxiv lore

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glassmaker04 · 6 years

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[Fic] Fragments of Memories

Title: Fragments of Memories

Fandom: Boku no Hero Academia

Pairing: Erasermight l Allmight x Eraserhead / Yagi Toshinori x Aizawa Shouta

Warning: This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events, locales, and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.

Notes: I’m not a English speaker, and I tried to write this understandable enough for reading. This is my first time posting a fiction in English. I’ve waiting an invitation from AO3 and I hope I should get it soon, so I’ll post this story on that too.

I hope whoever reading this would enjoyed. And thank you for reading!

———————————————————————————————————–

Part 1: How we met and learned our names

Toshinori’s Memories

Yagi Toshinori had a bad habit. He liked to help around, to be useful. He liked to stand up for old people in a train or helped them across a street. Or sometimes, he guided travelers getting to their destination. Maybe because he liked to hear people said ‘Thank you’ to him, made him feel alive and had a purpose for living. He wasn’t sure why but he just liked it.

Not only people he’d like to help, many times he picked up random stray animals, especially cats. Well, he picked up a puppy sometimes, but he had to put in a Dogs and Cats Adoption Center very quickly due to its noise, his landlord wouldn’t appreciate and might kick him out eventually.

So, cats were nice, quiet and observed. He tried to let them stay for a couple weeks before they were strong enough to put in the center. Yagi worked as a barista at a local cafe. He was lucky enough that the owner of the shop knew him for a long time and offered the job for him. It didn’t mean that he was bad or somewhat, just…his appearances.

Yagi Toshinori had been in a coma for months after got in a car crash accident 2 years ago. He had lost his weight as well as his muscles. Because of his abnormally height, he looked like a scary scarecrow with deep black eyes circle and sharp cheekbones. All that made him quitted his old job and his town.

The only thing that people knew he’s still alive was his eyes.

The bright blue eyes like blue sky in summer.

After struggling for months, he decided moving to Musutafu city, near Tokyo, by his old friend’s invitation. He was contented and happy, could pay his rent and had some money left for saving. Sometime, just sometime he might feed stray cats behind his apartment.

Today had been good so far for Toshinori. He woke up early, got in a surprisingly empty train, talked to decent customers and went home. He bought a bento, some tuna cans, a bottle of whole milk and water. When he walked passed a dark alley, he heard small noise.

Meow…meow…

Toshinori stopped, held his breath for a good minute just to make sure what he just heard. The tall man walked in a shadow where that little noise hid behind a big trash bin. Then, he saw a tiny black kitten with white spot on its chest and paws, very sparkle blue eyes staring back at him. The man kneeled down, reaching his right hand to the kitten.

“Hello, little guy.” Toshinori said softly. It sniffed little before started to lick his hand. The man laughed a bit, picking it up.

“Alright, looks like I have a kitten to save today!” the man stood up and began to continue his routine.

While he reached the corner of his apartment, he heard some bang noises and glass breaking. The tall man tried to look around and griped the little kitten in his hand more tight to his chest. Could be some fights with poor guys and mafia around here. It happened all the time, Toshinori had fasten his pace and finally reached his home safely.

“Home sweet home.” He said and put the cat on the carpet in the living room. His apartment had a good size, not too big yet not too small.

“Luckily, I do have milk for you.” Toshinori grab a bowl and poured the milk before handed to the cat. Toshinori sat down at a coffee table, watching this little fluffy black and white cat greedily licked the milk.

“What should I call you then…” He murmured, setting his bento and teared chopsticks, eating quietly beside the cat

‘Meow…meow…“ when it finished, the kitten hopped on Toshinori laps and settled to sleep. The man looked down and saw it already rolled into a ball.

“Umm…Maru, I think I should call you Maru.” Toshinori slightly patted at Maru’s ear. It purred with joy loudly.

Seemed like he had a good night indeed.

Bang!

Not likely, Toshinori suddenly woke up in the middle of the night. His eyes catched a digital number on a clock ‘4:34am’

“What the f…”

Bang!

That made him got up from the bed, and looked down from his window. He saw a shadow, like a man shape in the trash area. He saw it moved a bit before stayed still and red…red liquid began to spread. Toshinori looked again with his wide eyes before he could react, he was so sure that it was a human with blood laying down on the floor.

His blood ran cold before rushing to his living room and putting his jacket on. He smiled once he saw Maru slept soundly on a blanket he’d prepared for it on the sofa. Toshinori left his apartment and hurried to the back yard as a dumping area. The tall man carefully approached.

A man, with black hair covered all of his face, was laying on his stomach. Blood had spread like a small puddle. That made Toshinori almost screamed like a banshee, but he rushing kneeled beside the man.

“Hey! Are you okay, can you hear me?” Toshinori spoke as he rolled the man so that he could see the man’s face.

When Toshinori had a good look, he realized that the man’s still young or younger than him. The man’s face was so pale and his lips were almost blue. He had a big cut around his abdomen. Toshinori noticed something that look like a small plastic bag inside and…

Is that…cocaine?

“Fuck!” Toshinori couldn’t believe what he saw.

Is that…is that what I thought it would be?

“Don’t…don’t call an ambulance…or police… ” soft voice cut Toshinori’s mind. The tall man looked down with relief.

“You’re badly hurt and-”

“I know! Just…just put me somewhere so I can take it out and stitch it back” The man tried to sit up and had glared Toshinori with tired look, panting.

“Stitch it back!?”

“Get my bag, I’ll try to stand.” The younger man didn’t try to argue. He really meant what he said. Toshinori’s brain didn’t process fast enough, like a very slow turtle enjoyed the sun. What he could do was starring at the man struggled standing up. When he’s back to the reality, the man covered in blood stood up by his own. His long arm wrapped around his abdomen.

“Get the bag!” He snapped. Toshinori looked around and saw the black duffle bag near small bushed. He got the bag and said

“Let me carry you!”

“Wh-!!!”

Toshinori carried the man with his two arms. The man’s surprisingly light which made it easier to walk back to his apartment. The man was quiet and didn’t say anything else, only let out a soft panting, shaking and sweating.

Toshinori had to put him down in order to unlock the door. The man leaned against him and he heard more of panting. When they were inside, Toshinori put the man on the sofa where Maru was asleep.

“Meow!” the cat jumped by the suddenly disturbing. It ran and hid somewhere in the kitchen which Toshinori didn’t care much for right now.

“What should I do? Do you need a towel? Warm Water?” Toshinori’s panic. Of course he had to! There was a bloody man in his living room!!

“Sounds good…get all of that…p…please…” the man barely said this time, so much sweating on his forehead. Toshinori hurried to his bathroom.

Why he’s so damn calm!?

That was the actual sentence, screaming and tearing inside his head. Toshinori got everything he could think of (dry towel, a bucket of warm water, first aid kit!) and hurried back to the man. The man was panting more and more with his eyes closed.

“Hey! Stay with me.” Toshinori kneeled down in front of the man and patted him, trying to wake him up. The man opened his half lid eyes slowly.

“In…in the bag…there is a box…just…hand it to me.” the man said, trying to sit up. Toshinori looked inside the bag which he didn’t want to see much. He handed the box to him. The man looked in the blue eyes before broke the eyes contact. Toshinori saw he put something like a needle out and a thread.

“Use this to wipe the blood. Make sure I can see…that…” the man handed him packs of gauze. Toshinori knew exactly what to do. It made him more panick yet he didn’t show. His mind now was a tank of questions whlile he watched the man pulling out the plastic bag from his abdomen. The young man hissed and tried not to let out a sound.

Who is he? What’s he doing? Why he has THAT inside? Why he’s injured? What happened to him? Was he in the fight outside? Is he a citizen? Where he lives? Should I call police? Oh no, he said not. Or should I call his relatives instead?

What’s his name???

After awhile, Toshinori helped the man wipe all the blood and sweat with his towel and the gauze. The man did stitch himself with medical stuff in the bag. Looked like he knew what to do and he did it calmly with his shaking hands which made Toshinori’s heart beat faster every minute.

“S…Stop thinking, you’re distracting me.” The man spoke to him made his mind snapping to reality once more. The tall man bit hip lips.

“What happened to you?” he finally asked, tried to keep an eye on his task.

“No questions…not now…sorry…” the younger man answered which made Toshinori felt so small.

“Tell me about you…so I can stay conscious.” Toshinori’d glared for a good minute before coughing a little.

Damn it! I haven’t cough for two days! Why now!?

“Nothing to tell much, really. My name’s Yagi Toshinori and I’m a barista at a cafe.” Toshinori glared the tired eyes again. The man only hummed back to him. The wounds was closed now and looked clean enough before he wrapped bandages around his wound clumsily.

“Let me help.” Toshinori said and helped him. He’s extremely careful not to hurt the man.

“Thanks.” the man said with tired voice and his eyes almost closed. Toshinori loved to hear those words, but this time, he didn’t appreciate much like he used to.

“I would be cruel if I didn’t let you sleep here so I will-” not even finished the sentence, the younger man already shut his eyes. His breath was soft and his face’s still pale. Toshinori used a fresh towel wiped out all the sweat on his forehead.

“Alright…good night…”

There’s no way Toshinori would go back to sleep, so he decided that he had to watch the young man for good. Maru came back from the kitchen after Toshinori called it and slept on his laps. He apologized a little to the cat and patted its head. Toshinori looked up at the man’s face again. Time had passed, and somehow watching the younger man slept made Toshinori’s calmed down a little.

“What should I call you then?” he asked himself, not expected the answer. Yet as if the man had heard the question, he answered with soft yet firm voice.

“Ai…Aizawa Shouta…and thank you…by the way…” The bright blue eyes wided a little, then a slightly smile was on his lips.

“Aizawa-kun then.”

Toshinori didn’t know why, but he really wanted to help this person. He still smiled to himself.

Shouta’s Memories

Aizawa Shouta had a hobby, only one hobby. He liked taking pictures especially cats when he saw them no matter where or when. And most of the time, he didn’t care much what’s happening around him. It had been almost ten years now when he started it. Because he had a bad memory and memories lost after got into an accident, falling from a roof ten years ago. So, it was a logical solution that taking pictures was one of methods helping him remember and not to forget things.

Shouta couldn’t remember much of it, that accident, luckily enough only had a scar under his right eye. The doctor said it was normal for the head’s injury when his head hit hard at the ground. Although his normal knowledge, his skills and his job were still good, but people…he couldn’t remember faces and names well like before. Like he cared, he didn’t like people anyway.

He just moved in Musutafu city two months ago for a teaching job. Really, Him as a teacher! Couldn’t imagine it but it’s true. He’s a math and physics teacher at UA high school. Got recommendation from a friend, Kayama Nemuri, and she handed his resume without asking him.

‘It’s for the best Aizawa! You can’t do that shitty job all the time!’

She had said to him and he didn’t have enough energy to argue at that time. The shitty job she mentioned was a programmer job he used to work. It made him no time to eat, sleep or anything.

It had been a good day today. He finished grading papers a bit early and enjoyed watching the sunset at the school’s rooftop before walking home. On the way, he saw a gray cat sleeping on a tree, his phone ready in his hand taking many snapshots. While Shouta’s in his own mind, he bumped into a very tall man who walked pass and spilled his drink.

“Shit! I’m sorry.” Shouta apologized quickly. He looked up at the man and then…from nowhere… a warm nostalgic feeling stirred in his heart. A familiar low and soft voice spoke in his mind.

‘…Ya-…at a cafe…’

Shouta didn’t recognize that voice in his head, not surprise but somehow felt so familiar with the man’s messy blond hair and the bright blue eyes. It reminded him someone from his old memories he couldn’t recall.

“It’s ok, I’m-” the taller man looked up from the ground before glazing him for a while with his mouth slightly opened, wide eyes.

Had he known me? Had we met before?

“Sho…Aizawa-kun?” the tall man said with that exactly same low and soft voice. There were tears in his eyes as if he just found something precious to him. The taller man stepped closer but Shouta stepped back, caution.

The man looked sad with his reaction. Maybe this man did know him.

“Do we know each other?” Shouta asked with his cold voice, really didn’t mean to though.

“Wha-…don’t you… don’t you remember me?”

His brain did say ‘No, I don’t know you.’

But his mind…his mind quietly said…

‘Aizawa-kun then…’

“I’m… I’m not sure…” Shouta broke the eye’s contact and looked down with shame. He still had problems with memories lost.

“Oh…maybe I…sorry, I thought you were a friend I haven’t seen in ten years. Sorry about that.” Toshinori explained before gave a sorry look and began to leave.

A soft wind blew after watching the taller man turned his back. Shouta suddenly said

“Wait! What’s your name?”

The blond man turned back. His face’s full of hope, had a big smile and his blue eyes somehow were brighter than before. Shouta felt like he’s in sunflowers garden with a clear blue sky above.

“Yagi…Yagi Toshinori”

“Yagi-san then…”

Shouta didn’t know why, but he really wanted to get to know this person. And before he noticed, a small smile was already on his lips.

To be continue…

#fiction #boku no hero academia #erasermight #オル相 #yagi toshinori #aizawa shouta

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retrauxpunk · 6 years

Text

i saw this bunch of asks and i’ve decided to answer all of them because fuck waiting for asks that’s why

billie jean: what do you notice more in a song - the drums or bassline?

probably the drums. this is embarrassing but i barely even know what a bassline is. don’t ask.

sweet dreams (are made of this): what’s the best dream you’ve had?

i was in the hunger games with ben whishaw. we were sort of allies. we were some of the tributes remaining toward the end of the game. we had this intense moment of eye contact in which we weren’t sure if we were going to kill/get killed by the other, and then we made out. fuck yeah.

africa: favourite 80s music video?

i agree with @cheapskate-bleeding-queer, Dancing in the Street is really something.

every breath you take: who’s the first person your mind goes to when you hear a love song?

either my boyfriend or my ex, depending on what kind of love song it is haha

should i stay or should i go: how many languages do you speak?

one fluently, one relatively proficiently, and basic spoken knowledge for another

uptown girl: what’s your favourite book trope?

there’s too many! here are a few i like: allies fighting with sword-like weapons back to back; badass battle magic; characters deciding to make out as a way to hide their real agenda (e.g. trespassing); saving each other’s lives; cyberpunk/biopunk; urban fantasy; people who save the world/have magic powers but also have normal lives of school/work

don’t stop believin’: what’s the longest journey you’ve been on?

mmm... flying from sydney to london. jesus. an entire day. but it was business class, so it was pretty cushy ... the flight from germany to sydney felt much longer because it was in economy and the shorter flight (8) was first, and the second one (16 or some shit) was second, so really i was going a bit nuts.

i wanna dance with somebody (who loves me): who was the last person you danced with?

my boyfriend, at the paramore concert

maneater: where did you spend your last friday night?

hanging out at my boyfriend’s work, playing beer pong

jessie’s girl: what would you do if you found out your best friend was seeing your ex?

be incredibly shocked/surprised and upset and bitter ... and ask them why? and also chew out my ex too. but more angry at the best friend because they know how my relationship with the ex went and it’d be a real douchey move for them to get with them haha. ...thankfully this is very very very unlikely to happen.

born in the u.s.a.: what’s your home town like?

sunny with a beautiful harbour. very expensive in terms of housing. pretty multicultural, with white, asian, and middle eastern being the dominant groups (in descending order). lots of great food.

wake me up before you go-go: how did your last date go?

saw Early Man with my boyfriend at the cinema. it was nice. uneventful but pleasant, which is how things usually go when you’ve been together for years...

girls just want to have fun: relationship with your parents?

we have really different/conflicting views about basically everything, which is what happens when we’re from different generations and grew up in different cultures... #immigrantlife but they tried their best and love me and i love them even though it has been kinda rough

beat it: opinions on the police force?

a necessary institution, i’d rather have one than not have one, but has several serious endemic issues regardless of which culture we’re talking about

never gonna give you up: how old were you when you joined the internet?

around the time this was a meme haha :p ... around 12-13, when I got into message boards and post by post roleplaying.

faith: when was your first kiss?

15 for a peck, 17 for making out

i’m so excited: where was your first kiss?

outside my house for the peck, and in Sydney’s Hyde Park for making out

take on me: could you reach the high note?

absolutely not, but i make a dumb attempt anyway

footloose: favourite musical?

The Book of Mormon!!!!!!!

9 to 5: do you like country music?

I’m not sure. Maybe?

back in black: what makes a good rock song?

a strong beat! strength of instruments! a hot voice and good lyrics. makes me want to start drumming my fingers/tapping feet/headbanging, no matter where i am. i’m too crap at music to be able to give a better answer, so have that subjective one.

material girl: are you sentimental?

absolutely. i’ll bleed my heart all over your carpet and ruin your clothes. though i don’t know if that comes across for people who don’t know me too well?

walk this way: what was the most expensive thing you bought in the last six months?

probably concert tickets for me and my boyfriend ... either that or my Doc Martens

you shook me all night long: are you seeing anyone at the moment?

yup

thriller: favourite film genre and why?

I like quite a few, but probably action/thriller. I love good action movies, I love watching well-choreographed combat and general Cool Badassitude, and the dialogue tends to be peppered with fun humour too. Really good for suspense and engagement.

i want candy: chocolate or sweets?

Chocolate

ghostbusters: how far do you believe in the paranormal?

I don’t really, but I wouldn’t push my luck either.

the power of love: does true love exist?

absolutely! all love is true love. if it’s not true, it’s not love.

hungry like the wolf: what’s your crush’s favourite music genre?

stuff like Queen

walk like an egyptian: favourite song currently in the charts?

Lemon To A Knife Fight by the Wombats

(i’ve had) the time of my life: if you could relive any ten minutes of your life, what would you relive?

listening to Pink Floyd’s Time while on acid (the first time I’d tried either the album or the drug)

just can’t get enough: what’s your guilty pleasure?

I don’t really feel guilty about my pleasures?

i’m gonna be (500 miles): how far apart do you and your best friend live?

lmao. a 24 hour flight apart. about as far away as you can get

you spin me round (like a record): favourite modern cover of an older song?

i don’t know many, but the Scissor Sisters cover of Comfortably Numb as a disco hit is really good!

we built this city: if you were president, what would your first ruling be?

oh god uh I don’t know. but some stuff I’d like to make happen are: increasing taxes on fossil fuels, more protections for queer folk, making abortion safe and easily accessible, overhauling the sex ed curriculum in schools to include a lot more focus on consent and the nuances of consent instead of focussing purely on physical sexual health, increasing funding for mental health, OH BOY I COULD GO ON AND ON

how will i know: do you believe everyone is deserving of love?

by default yes ... for people like ivan milat ... no ... so, yes, except in the extreme cases of people proven to be unrepentant and unwilling to reform after committing atrocities

nothing’s gonna stop us now: what’s been the biggest hurdle you’ve faced in your life so far?

either my own mental health RE being quite neurotic/obsessive, or a bad former partner who did some things that fucked me up. they’ve recently seemed to be truly sorry/empathetic though so that one at least will be getting better now. tbh they’re both getting better, so that’s nice!

come on eileen: have you ever written a song? if so, what was the genre?

i kinda wrote lyrics and had an idea for a melody for this ... some kind of bad sappy love song that would probably be in the pop rock category? oh god i’m so glad i have no further memory of it

living on a prayer: which was the song of your childhood?

if we’re talking pre-teenagerhood ... um ... I dunno! maybe ‘Sk8er Boi’ or Atomic Kitten’s ‘The Tide is High’ haha. as for my mid-teens ... Tokio Hotel’s ‘Der Letzte Tag’. late teens, it’d be ... maybe Taylor Swift’s ‘Holy Ground’.

sweet child o’ mine: describe your perfect first date.

meeting somewhere public, having good food and drink, excellent conversation and laughs, then going to my/their place and having more of the same, and making out and potentially Other Things wink nudge giggle wink wink nudge

don’t you (forget about me): is there anyone from your past that you regret cutting ties with?

No. HA. feels good to say that

eye of the tiger: favourite 80s movie?

i .................. don’t know if I have one

under pressure: give an example of a world event that occurred the year you were born.

Nelson Mandela was inaugurated as president of South Africa

with or without you: what would you value most: a relationship or a job?

oh my god i don’t fucking know.

another one bites the dust: where did you achieve your biggest accomplishment?

what ... even was my biggest accomplishment ... I guess either in my school’s exam hall (getting a high ATAR), or on my apartment couch (finishing NaNoWriMo)

pour some sugar on me: turn ons?

oh boy, hmm: having the exact same ideological beliefs as me; a lean but toned body; Irish/Scottish/Russian accents (among several others); neck kisses; being clever; being very skilled at something (esp something with a physical dimension e.g. drawing, playing guitar, snowboarding, etc.); the right amount of confidence/bravado but only when I’m already into them (otherwise this becomes a 10000x turn-off)

in the air tonight: do you enjoy flying?

YEAH BB

tainted love: thoughts on synthesisers/electronic drum kits/technology based music?

i have no problem with it and it can produce excellent stuff just like any older instrument

like a virgin: share a controversial opinion.

i hate avocados

karma chameleon: what do you like most about your appearance?

on good days, hair and face. otherwise, my body.

#this was fun!#these are good questions #about me #ask quiz

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unt2017 · 5 years

Text

Eleanor & Park by Rainbow Rowell

Genre: Realistic Fiction

Image

Evaluation/Response

I found Eleanor & Park to be a sweet story, yet very predictable. For example, the characters of Eleanor and Park themselves are predictable because Eleanor is a stereotypical girl from the “wrong side of the tracks” and Park seems to have a good family and tries to be one of those guys who doesn’t cause trouble. He wants to fit in. According to Tunnell, Jacobs, Young & Bryan (2016):

Good books must have characters that are unique and believable…It is impossible to identify with or have feelings for a person unless we know the individual and it is the author’s job to show us the character’s personality in such a way that we can become involved with his or her life (Tunnell et al., 2016, p.17).

I feel like in the case of Park’s character, I did not find him to be much of an interesting character. In fact, Rowell introduced him as a complete jerk. His first interaction with Eleanor was not that great. “Sit down…It came out angrily…Jesus-fuck…just sit down” (9). This interaction tells me as a reader what kind of person Park is initially. I’m not sure I would have called him the protagonist of the book because although he is a main character, I believe he lacks the other characteristics of a true main character. According to our textbook Tunnell et al. (2016): “...protagonists must be round or multidimensional so we know a great deal about them” (Tunnell et al., 2016, p. 18). I do not see Park as round or multidimensional. In chapter 8, he sees Eleanor reading his comics and his mind goes to what she looks like:

Park didn’t know that anyone with red hair could have brown eyes. (He didn’t know that anyone could have hair that red. Or skin that white). The new girl’s eyes were darker than his mom’s, really dark, almost like holes in his face. That made it sound bad, but it wasn’t, That made it sound bad, but it wasn’t. It might even be the best thing about her (Rowell, 2013, p. 33).

I feel like that observation made Park just another typical guy character. I feel like there should be more character development by this point in the book. As for Eleanor, I feel like was more of a protagonist and a dynamic character or as Tunnell et al. (2016) says “…one that changes over the course of the story.” (18). It was up to her to watch out for and protect her siblings Ben, Mouse, Maisie, and the baby who was never named. I honestly can’t imagine having a family like hers. Park made her believe that there was a possibility of a different life, and it was because of him she found a way out of her predicament, but at a cost. Rowell (2016) wrote “Elanor hadn’t written him a letter, it was a post card. Just three words long” (325). I’m pretty sure I know what those three words were supposed to be, but honestly, there are many ways that story was meant to end which leads me to the second part of a story: the plot.

According to Tunnell et al., (2016) the plot shows “…what happens to the characters in such a way that the reader cares about the outcome…Well-defined plots introduce a question early on that will be answered yes or no by the end of the story” (18). I honestly did not see what the plot was meant to be for this book. According to our text, there should be a question posted early on that defines what the plot will be, but there wasn’t one from what I read. Was it supposed to be about the romance between the two main characters? Was it about the contrast between his family and hers? There was no clear-cut plot no matter how much I enjoyed the book.

A theme that came up from time to time is the differences in their families. I learned that some parents don’t feel like they have many options. I have seen and heard about that. It is possible that once they get out of a situation, they aren’t sure how to move forward with the next steps. It was a good book. Which leads me to the question found in William’s article (n.d), “How well did you enjoy the text as entertainment?” I thought it was a good book, not the best I’ve read, but not the worst either. The chapters were short and I liked how each chapter or so changed point of view, but did so without being overwhelming. I feel like the story itself was rather predictable. They end up falling in love, but something keeps them apart. I’ve read stories like it before. I became rather fond of Eleanor, but I still wasn’t much of a fan of Park in the beginning or in the end. The only time he seemed rather decent was when he confronted Eleanor’s step dad. They made me remember what it felt like to have a crush/fall in love for the first time. I wanted it to work out and have a happy ending, but I’m okay with the way it ended. It wasn’t the ending I wanted, but it fit the flow of the story.

Speaking of the flow of the story, according to Tunnell et al. (2016): “The words make the book by defining characters, moving the plot along, identifying the setting, isolating the theme, creating the tone, identifying the point of view, developing the mood, establishing the pace, making the story believable, and reporting information accurately” (Tunnell et al., 2016, pp. 24-25). While I believe it doesn’t have all the elements of weak writing, but just because it has some doesn’t take away from it being a relatively good story. Weak writing is defined by our text as “…not clear but fuzzy, not believable but implausible, not interesting but dull” (Tunnell et al., 2016, p. 32), and I found this to be true of Eleanor & Park by Rainbow Rowell. Tunnell et al., (2016) states: “The author treats the audience with respect and writes so that the text is honest and interesting” (33). Eleanor & Park is honest in a way that only authors can be in a young adult novel. However, just because it seems to be an honest way of looking at different aspects of life doesn’t mean it is because of good writing.

Conclusion

I would recommend this book and author despite the fact I feel like I have read better books. In my opinion, it didn’t have much of a plot and while I found Eleanor to be an interesting character, Park was not as interesting and in fact irritated me because I felt like he was too stereotypical even when the author tried to write him in the midst of his crush and “falling in love” with Eleanor. On a scale from one to ten, I would probably rate this book a six because of the themes that were sprinkled into the book: family, love, and a little bit about creating trust, but not because of the parts of the story, like characters and the plot.

References:

Rowell, R. (2013). Eleanor & Park. New York: St. Martin’s Griffin.

“Eleanor & Park” (n.d). [image] retrieved from https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/15745753-eleanor-park

Tunnell M.O., Jacobs, J.S., Young T.A. & Bryan, G. (2016). How to Recognize a Well-Written Book. in Children’s Literature Briefly, (pp. 35-46.). Upper Saddle River, NJ: Pearson.

Williamson, O.M. (2006). “Reader Response”. Retrieved from http://utminers.utep.edu/omwilliamson/engl0310link/readerresponse.htm

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meyerlansky · 7 years

Note

Yes, please! I would love a daemon explanation, explanations and Boardwalk babbles are the best.

…is this for all of them

i’m gonna do all of them

because this is who i am as a person

FAIR WARNING LONG POST AHEAD and it’s even longer under the cut. also general disclaimer that this is all personal thoughts and rationale and i tried to make my reasoning as easy to follow as possible, but in a lot of cases there’s a not-insubstantial amount of symbolism/superficiality/whatever, and some choices have less biological rationale than others. second disclaimer that i TRIED to keep my reasons for picking daemons within the same taxonomic group consistent [i.e. all the people with canid daemons are canids for the same or similar reasons, all the bird daemons are bird-daemons for similar reasons, etc] but it’s not always the case. also not every set i’ve made has been posted yet, and not every set i’m planning has been finished, so if anyone wants to know rationale behind later daemons feel free to ask again :D OKAY SO HERE WE GO:

nucky — white-tailed eagle

from the start nucky’s pretty solidly been some kind of predatory sea bird in my head, for what are probably fairly obvious reasons: a predator because, like most of the characters i’ve continued to give predator/carnivore daemons [and there are a LOT of carnivore daemons], he makes his living off the desires—and suffering—of other people, a bird because he thinks of himself as more above the dirty work of street-level gangstering, and a sea bird because of how intrinsically his goals are tied to Atlantic City as a whole. originally i had an osprey for nucky, for a few reasons. one element of my reasoning for the osprey was their flashy coloring, to parallel his predilection for loud clothes a la his salmon suit in the early seasons, and the fact that ospreys are not technically considered “sea eagles,” which i thought fit with his position as more of a politician than a gangster. changing his daemon to a white-tailed eagle was actually kind of a snap decision on sunday night before i posted the first photoset, and… honestly i based the change on the fact that ospreys prefer to take their prey live, whereas the true sea eagles [including bald eagles, as a note] are far more open to scavenging after other predators have done the heavy lifting for them. so that kind of covers the “not a real gangster” angle as well as the more biological metaphor with the osprey. the flashiness analogue was lost a little bit, since ospreys are definitely a bit more exciting to look at, but nucky’s look sobers up after s1 and definitely after s2, so i figure it’s a worthwhile loss. white-tailed eagles also get a bonus in that they’re native to ireland and have been successfully reintroduced there, whereas ospreys apparently died out in ireland in the 19thc. there’s a few instances where i tried to match animal ranges to ethnicities, but i gave up on that when it became too limiting, but i still like to note it where it matches up :P

the other seven i’ve posted so far are under the cut!

eli — black bear

the fact that black bears are the most common and smallest of the north american bears drawing a parallel to eli’s inferiority complex is a minor reason, but really i picked a black bear literally so i could make the mama-bear joke, considering daemons are the “opposite” gender of their person. that’s literally it. he’s big, burly, and scary when you go after his kids, but pretty non-confrontational otherwise.

margaret — sand cat

OKAY SO margaret is another one who went through some changes, although hers aren’t as recent as “the sunday before i started posting the sets.” initially i had her as some kind of deer, specifically a fallow deer, back when i was sticking to the range-ethnicity parallel. deer also get scarily protective of their offspring, and they’re quiet but can be dangerous when backed into a corner, so it felt like… an okay fit, if not a perfect one. and then i thought about it some more, and let’s be real: margaret is as much a carnivore as the bulk of the cast, though not necessarily an APEX PREDATOR the same way a lot of the gangster daemons shook out to be. i toyed with giving her some kind of mustelid, but at the moment meyer’s the only one with one of those and she’s not QUITE coldly-ruthless enough to be in the same class as martens :P she got something that looks cute and pettable on the outside, but is actually extremely well-adapted to fill a carnivorous niche in harsh environments, which is a deliberate metaphor for her ability to survive no matter what she’s facing, while using other people’s perceptions to slide under the radar if need be. despite their cute appearance, sand cats also pack a bite force quotient of 136, which means that, relative to their body size, they deliver more force per bite than MANY other predators, including wolves, hyenas, and tigers. fitting, considering margaret is one of the only characters who can definitively be said to come out on top by the end of season five. a final tidbit for mags: she’s one of the few characters whose daemon i thought up a name for. his name is properly “gallchobhair” but once they get to the states it pretty quickly gets americanized to “gallagher” and they give up trying to correct people after a few months.

owen — yellow mongoose

owen gave me SO MUCH TROUBLE, you would not BELIEVE. for the same reasons i eventually settled on a sand cat for margeret, owen got a mongoose: cute to look at, but can fuck up anything that needs fucking up if they get in their way. initially i gave owen a river otter, because of their density in ireland, the aforementioned mustelid reputation of fucking shit up, and the connection between an aquatic mammal and his position as nucky’s bodyguard and bootlegging shipment protector. an otter for owen [haaa] never sat 100% perfectly with me, though, in no small part because the aquaticness of his job is really tangential to what he does and who he is as a character. also otters are mustelids, but they… aren’t exactly intimidating. mongooses, on the other hand, have the deserved reputation as cobra-killers, which is a bit more appropriate for a dude who sliced through a man’s fingers to choke him to death. that said, yellow mongooses don’t live off snakes and are pretty social creatures, which i thought was a decent parallel to owen wanting out of the gangster lifestyle and wanting to settle down with margaret, all interpretation as to whether he would’ve stuck with that aside. this is one of the choices i’m not completely confident with, so hopefully it doesn’t seem too horribly out-there to people with more of an investment in owen than i’ve got.

jimmy — ethiopian wolf

a lot of the gangster types have wild canids. it’s kind of unavoidable as a parallel, because gangsters tend to stick together in a way that cats don’t, but the apex predator position can’t go unacknowleged. i went with an ethiopian wolf for jimmy in particular because it’s not an especially well-known species, so i couldn’t get super slammed for being unoriginal by picking a grey wolf or something. they’re further down the evolutionary chain than jackals [who will make an appearance IN LATER PHOTOSETS] but not so far down as to be right next to or within the sphere of domesticated dogs; for the canids i interpreted relative-distance-from-domestication as commentary on how independent the character[s] in question operated throughout the show. jimmy is fairly reliant on his social connections, not willing to make moves on nucky until he has support from the other younger gangsters, but not totally unable to strike out on his own–even if he’s not running with a full-fledged “pack” of other younger gangsters, he’s always got at least one compatriot at his side in pretty much any endeavor. ethiopian wolves are also less physically intimidating than other larger wolf species, which fits jimmy’s tendency to think things through rather than rushing in and relying on brute force to win. and… alright, this is a reason decided upon in bad taste because i’m a bad person, and i debated whether i should cop to it or not, but i highly doubt anyone’s gonna even bother reading this, so: ethiopian wolves also have some of the highest rates of incidental inbreeding due to their tendency to not disperse offspring very far. there you go, i'm officially The Worst.

gillian — trumpeter swan

gillian as a swan is also probably a fairly obvious choice, between the water motif, the graceful beauty swans are known for, and the way they’ll peck your eyes out if you get too close to their roost—especially if they’ve got babies. again, the sees-self-as-above-dirty-work played into the choice of a bird daemon, and i’m also not opposed to the idea that gillian would be a witch the way many bird-daemon-havers are in the HDM canon. nucky probably isn’t a witch, but gillian totally could be. anyway, i went with a trumpeter swan specifically because they’re the biggest of the north american swans, and gillian runs with some pretty big players, so i thought it fit. they also are somewhat pleasant to listen to compared to other swans, their calls do sound a bit like trumpets as the name implies, which fits with gillian’s preference to talk her way out of situations by telling other people things they don’t mind hearing. they were also on the brink of extinction in the early 20th century, which would add to the air of exceptionality and desirability gillian cultivates for herself. i know rose definitely helped out with this one so a lot of the credit goes to her on what gillian got.

angela— desert cottontail

i’ll accept flak for giving angela one of the only purely-herbivorous daemons among the whole cast, but really nothing else i tried out for her fit as well. rabbits are small, quiet, and as one of the few characters who’s essentially a noncombatant through the show, she got a noncombative species. since angela is hardly antisocial the more solitary rabbit species didn’t quite fit, but for me one of her defining characteristics is her disinterest in traditional domesticity, so the european rabbit with its extensive social burrows was out too. desert cottontails strike a happy medium, as they’re more comfortable with shared or overlapping territories than many hares and larger rabbits, but don’t nest communally. rabbits also give birth to young that can’t fend for itself immediately after birth, which felt fitting since angela rejects domesticity but wholly embraces motherhood. also credit to rose on this one because i’m pretty sure we talked about hedgehogs for angela which put me on the path of small herbivores; i think i was still in “daemons should either be new world animals or range match character ethnicity” mode and went for rabbit instead because of that BUT CREDIT WHERE IT’S DUE ANYWAY FOR TRAIN OF THOUGHT

richard — rhodesian ridgeback

probably there’s disagreement out there on this one, especially given where i stand on what a domesticated animal as your daemon means about your strength of will, but from what i remember of HDM canon, soldiers tend to have loyal fall-in-line types of animals like canines, so career-soldier richard got a domestic dog. as for the breed, rhodesian ridgebacks are visually-intimidating dogs with a protective streak but generally calm in adulthood. they tend to be good with kids, especially when the dogs themselves are older and their energy level isn’t puppyish anymore. not super invested in this one, you might be able to tell :P

#boardwalk empire #daemon au #bwedaemons #LONG POST I'M SO SORRY #anyway #yes #such symbols #very metaphors #wow #opheliaintherushes #asks

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ciathyzareposts · 4 years

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Game 347: Mirai (1987)

I believe these characters translate literally as “not yet come,” which is as good as any way to say “the future.”

Mirai

Japan

Xain (developer and publisher)

Released 1987* for PC-88, PC-98, MSX, and Sharp X1

Date Started: 13 November 2019

Date Ended: 17 November 2019

Total Hours: 6

Difficulty: Moderate-Hard (3.5/5)

Final Rating: (to come later)

Ranking at time of posting: (to come later)

*Various sites have Mirai‘s releases between 1985 and 1987. I’m persuaded that its earliest release was probably 1987 for the PC-88; some of the other platforms may have followed in subsequent years.

When I was compiling my master list, I rejected from the main list any Japanese game that didn’t originally receive a western release. This was because I assumed that everything in the game would be in Japanese, and that it would therefore take me too long to translate the text, given that (unlike, say, German or French) I can’t even type the characters into a translation tool. Yes, I realize it’s possible to use some tools by taking pictures or even scanning over the screen, but none of these are fast or accurate enough to make gameplay truly possible. I tried with The Dragon & Princess (1982) but ultimately couldn’t get anywhere without a full translation from helpful commenters.

However, I didn’t count on the fact that a number of early JRPGs were in English, or at least mostly so, even in their original Japanese releases. We’ve had some speculation as to why this was true, but nothing that’s ever fully satisfied me. Whatever the reason, I’ve been slowly re-investigating some of the titles originally rejected, to see if they are in fact playable in English. Mirai was one of those that made the cut, and it recently came up in a more-or-less random sort of my backlog.

The title means “future” in Japanese, which is why it is also the name of a Toyota hybrid sedan and a 2018 animated film about a time traveler. Several sites have translated the backstory that scrolls up the screen in katakana: It is the year 720 in the space era. Because of the destruction of the Earth’s environment, humanity is seeking other planets to which to emigrate. Seven planets have been identified in the “Reinbow Nebula,” but they are swarming with ferocious aliens. (These aliens are totally not just protecting their home.) Enter the protagonist, a legendary soldier, with his jetpack and power armor.

The game’s primary RPG credentials are found in its inventory.

Mirai is a side-scrolling action RPG. The player begins on Planet 1 with 200 energy, 100 fuel, and 100 cash. The joystick moves the player around, including up and down, expending fuel with every move. Energy is like hit points–when enemies attack, it depletes–but it also serves as an emergency fuel reserve.

Enemies start swarming from the game’s opening seconds, and they vary in lethality, durability, and patterns of movement. Mostly they damage you by hitting you directly, though a small number are capable of firing missile weapons. There are frog-like aliens that seem to move around randomly, colorful ships that always attack in a line, making them hard to avoid, and little flying saucers that like to swarm the moment you enter a tight corridor. You have to be quick on both the trigger and the movement keys. As with the recent Deadly Towers, once you fire your weapon, you can’t fire again until it hits something or the missiles clear the screen, so it’s important to time your fire carefully.

Grinding outside a warp center.

Killing enemies increases both experience and the “Shoot P” statistic. Each jetpack level has a “warp center.” Finding it is a priority. There, you can change your “Shoot P” numbers for cash, then spend cash on fuel and energy (which are relatively cheap), weapon upgrades, and special items. After some grinding on the first level, I went from a “Beam” weapon to a more powerful “Needle” weapon to a “Triple” blaster that shoots three shots in a spread every time you fire.

There are also special items to purchase. I don’t know what some of them do. “U_Jump” allows you better jumps on underground levels (more in a second); “P_Barr” creates a defensive barrier temporarily; “P_Hour” stops time for enemies temporarily. The ones I’ve figured out are useful enough that there’s a real incentive to grind for cash.

“M_Scan” makes a little minimap of the level.

The warp centers are also the only places to save the game. It costs 80 credits to save. I like the idea of having to pay in-game currency to save. Only a few titles have implemented such a system so far.

Having to pay to save means the player is encouraged not to save-scum.

Levels have occasional boss creatures. When they appear, their names show up in the lower-right screen along with their hit points. On the first level, they were flowery things called “B_ameda” that were able to shoot missiles. (Some of you Japanese-English experts tell me what all the underscores are supposed to signify.) They were also immune to the starting “Beam” weapon, so I had to upgrade before I could kill them.

Shooting the “B_ameda” with the triple blaster.

Killing boss creatures is necessary to activate various portals between areas of each level. Once you pass through a portal from a jetpack area, you find yourself in an “underground” area where gameplay is very different. Instead of flying around with a jetpack, you walk around, and instead of shooting enemies, you punch and kick them. It looks to me like you’re playing a female in these areas, too, although I’m not sure how that squares with the backstory.

Near a portal to the other half of the level.

You move around by climbing ladders and jumping from platform to platform, and the rules of both are different in Mirai than any other platformer I’ve played. You can’t grab ladders in the air, for instance. The only way to use them is to start climbing on them from the bottom. When jumping you can move latterly a little distance in the air, but not very much. It’s frankly hard to nail down the specific rules.

Climbing a ladder, although it looks more like a vine.

In the underground areas, all creatures are “boss” creatures, and there are only a few per level. The first one I played featured monstrous mushrooms called “Blueka” and beholder-like blobs “Dminga.” A later area had something I can’t even describe called “Norm” and little round balls with teeth called “goblins.” To fight them without losing too much health, you have to time your approach carefully, trying to punch or kick them from the rear before they have time to react. There are no warp stations in the underground areas, so you need a stock of good gear from the jetpack levels.

The freaky “Dminga.”

There are places where you can get stuck, unable to jump out unless you have one of the “u_jump” items from the store. These effectively double the height you can jump but also seem to make your jumps more maneuverable.

Eventually, after you’ve passed through enough portals, you meet the level boss. Special items don’t seem to work in his presence, so defeating him is a long process of learning his patterns, hitting him while his back is turned, and using jumps to avoid his missiles.

The level boss kills me as I take this screenshot.

Once I defeated the first boss, I found myself on the second planet. It also proved to be a trade-off between jetpack areas and walking areas, with different enemies and different bosses. Eventually, I got stuck in a small area that has a warp center but otherwise no exits. I thought maybe I’m supposed to grind here until I get enough money for one of the “U_Teleport” devices, but this warp center doesn’t sell items. Unfortunately, I saved over the only save slot at this warp center.

This warp center has suit shops, but I’m low on cash.

Even if there was a way to proceed, it took me about 6 hours (with quite a bit of reloading; I’m not good at action games) to reach this point, and it’s hard to see spending another 36 hours, assuming that each planet takes the same amount of time. One level, one boss sounds about right for a side-scrolling action game that barely achieves RPG status.

Micro-bosses on Level 2 are “beetles.”

If you’re curious about the end you can see a one-hour LP of the MSX version done by someone who cheated with maximum power-ups at the very beginning and had a map. The levels get more elaborate, the enemies more numerous and quicker, the bosses tougher, but the game remains fundamentally the same. The final boss is named Kariguls. Unfortunately, the conclusion in this particular video is in unpunctuated, poorly-translated English.

The hardness of the world the seven two one cosmic century the war of aggression at Reinbow Nebula was brought to the end as a result of an increase in population many war had been over again I think you had a hard time of it in the case human forecast the future feel uneasy and cherish a desire but hope love and peace I wish you happiness.

Glad we cleared up. On the GIMLET, I give it:

1 point for a bare minimum game world, including a framing story that isn’t well-referenced in-game (who is the woman?)

1 point for the most minor kind of character development with no character creation.

0 points for no NPCs

2 points for encounters and foes. I like how JRPGs often feature boss-level creatures that force you to adjust tactics on the fly, but the implementation of that system is at its most basic here.

The female hero fights a “mool” on Level 2.

2 points for magic and combat. There are some minor tactical considerations in combat.

3 points for equipment, its most developed RPG area.

I never figured out the use for some of these items.

3 points for an economy that works well, rewarding grinding and conservation of funds.

2 points for a man quest.

1 point for a barely-acceptable interface, mediocre graphics and sound, and sluggish keys.

0 points for gameplay. This is a highly subjective category, but there wasn’t really anything I liked about it. Far too linear, far too large for its limited content, and by the second level it was already getting too hard.

That gives us a final score of 15. I doubt even players who like side-scrolling action games would find a lot of value in this one. As for me, it’s probably my least-favorite sub-genre, and I’m going to want to see a lot more RPG and story elements (like Nihon Falcom’s Sorcerian from the same year) before I invest any more time in one.

This ain’t no soft action RPG.

Xain, also known as Zainsoft and Sein-Soft, published only a handful of games in its short history in the late 1980s. It is best known for Tritorn (1985) and its two sequels, which are also on my backlist and are also side-scrolling platformers. The company’s last title, 1990’s Valusa no Fukushū, is also a side-scrolling action game, but I don’t think I’d call it a “platformer” anymore.

Although side-scrolling action with platform elements isn’t what most players would later think of as “JRPGs,” it’s notable how many early Japanese entries featured these characteristics. The earliest was perhaps Xanadu: Dragon Slayer 2 (1985), although there are quite a few 1984/1985 games I haven’t yet investigated. Later ones include Sorcerian (1987), Zeliard (1987), Castlevania II (1987), The Scheme (1988), and parts of Zelda II (1988). The sub-genre is virtually unknown outside of Japan. But of course Japan had also led the way with non-RPG platformers (Donkey Kong, 1981) and side-scrolling platformers (Jump Bug, 1981, and most notably Super Mario Bros., 1985). It makes sense that some developers in that country would try to attach RPG elements to a successful template.

source http://reposts.ciathyza.com/game-347-mirai-1987/

#retro games #dos games #retro #crpg #adventure #amiga #oldcomputers #8bit #16bit #blog #repost

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nikki-reuclife · 5 years

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day trading alerts

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cryptnus-blog · 6 years

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Blockchain Creates True Digital Assets

New Post has been published on https://cryptnus.com/2018/11/blockchain-creates-true-digital-assets/

Blockchain Creates True Digital Assets

As I wrote about earlier this year here, Blockchain and Intellectual Property (IP) are a likely pairing. The gaming industry has exploded, particularly with respect to digital games. GameStop earns billions annually from reselling physical games – which are only 24% of all games sold. The remaining 76% are digital games, and the trend is moving further to digital games. Steam, the primary digital games distribution engine, is now holding all the power in personal computing games. When consumers ‘buy’ a digital PC game it really amounts to a lease (but costs the same as buying) because they cannot transfer that game – so consumers are really trading their ownership rights to Steam in exchange for convenience.

I recently learned about Equiti Games, a New York company that is creating a new standard for ownership of digital games, as “true digital assets” by using universal and open licensing. I spoke with Equiti Games Founder and CEO Tony Caputo to learn more about what they’re doing, what they’ve learned along the way, and what tips they have for other startups.

Happy young man at home playing video games

Mary Juetten: Where are you based and when did you start?

Tony Caputo: We are Equiti Games based out of Katonah, NY – just north of NYC. We also have a small team in the Bay Area. The idea started percolating in early 2017, and we really started ramping up the company more fully in October 2017.

Juetten: What problem are you solving?

Caputo: We are bringing back ownership to digital games with the ability to give your game to a friend or sell your game after you’re done playing it. We are also addressing game publishers’ loss of revenue to gray markets by giving developers a percentage of pre-owned game sales. GameStop earned over $2B in pre-owned sales in 2017 and game developers made nothing.

Juetten Who are your customers and how do you find them?

Caputo: Our end consumers consist of three main categories: gamers, game developers, and third-party marketplaces. Gamers are mainly on social media groups, game news sites, streaming platforms, and game communities. We keep in touch with a network of game developers and publishers that we already know from experience and are reaching out to new developers by compiling public listings of game catalogs and developers. We reach out directly as well as through game conferences and our personal network. Lastly, we work with third-party marketplaces through game community sites, which are spread organically through different webs of social and gaming networks.

Juetten: How did past projects and/or experience help with this new project?

Caputo: I founded leaptrade.com back in 2011 as a reaction to gamers getting ripped off by retailers when they would trade in their games. For example, trading in your $50 game, getting $25 from the retailer, and have them turn around and put it back on the pre-owned shelf for $55. Leaptrade is a P2P game trading platform for physical games (discs and cartridges), allowing gamers to get the real value for their games ($50 instead of $25 from a retailer), save money and play more games.

Building Leaptrade gave me invaluable experience with how marketplaces work, managing a virtual economy, and what users are looking for when buying and selling pre-owned games. Running a virtual resale marketplace using digital currencies has led me to appreciate what makes secondary game markets different from a consumer’s perspective, and how much rides on maintaining loyalty through well-balanced incentives.

Juetten: Who is on your team?

Caputo: I have a co-founder, Nicole Allen, who is the Director of Developer Relations. Nicole is experienced in the media and social aspects of the gaming/tech industry and has also curated her own personal brand, Nixie Pixel. Plus, I have a group of very talented people rounding out my team.

Juetten: Did you raise money?

Caputo: Yes, we’ve raised $750k so far, and recently won the Founders World Championship which includes a prize of $1M in investment and another $1M in services – bringing our current total to $1.75M. Details of the contest are available here. We are also conducting a private token sale.

Juetten: Startups are an adventure– what’s your favorite startup story?

Caputo: One of my favorite stories is how we started working with our first game publisher, an indie game distributor called tinyBuild. We had wanted to get input on our platform as early possible, but we didn’t have a website up, our marketing material wasn’t finalized, and we hadn’t even moved into our office, but we figured why not give it a try? We were big fans of tinyBuild because they had spoken out about the issues we were trying to solve with grey market game sales. After just one phone conversation, the technology and the concept was so compelling that Luke Burtis joined up immediately. With the current set of tools limiting available platforms, Luke couldn’t run his business the way he wanted to and we were the only platform providing any sort of viable alternative. The result of Luke coming on board was that we got first-hand insight into the problems facing indie-game publishers, which in turn allowed us to fine-tune our platform to solve for industry-specific pain points.

Juetten: How do you measure success and what is your favorite success story?

Caputo: For us, success means changing the industry. As far as my favorite success stories involving entrepreneurs and companies with a vision, I think Tesla is a really good one. We may not remember now, but Elon Musk took a big risk building high-end electric cars. It was a niche market, few people thought it would be successful, and people presently continue to question the financial prospects of his companies. Elon builds a lot of things that you wouldn’t do if you’re just trying to make a lot of money, but he proved that people needed and wanted electric vehicles. In this way, I think that success is measured by effecting underlying change: while the Tesla company could fold, electric cars have become widely popularized. Tesla created a technology that anybody can use.

Juetten: Any tips to add for early-stage founders?

Caputo: Move the needle forward every day. Even if you feel like it’s not perfect, get something out there. You have to break the fallacy that a startup has to look like a well-established company because you need to move forward, gain traction, and get to the next step. Things are never perfect, and you are never going to be as ready as you want to be. People will be excited about what you’re doing and will cut you some slack. People want to believe in what you are doing so be genuine and execute on something every day. If you’re putting yourself out there, then you can adapt to the feedback you are getting. If you can already tell a strategy isn’t working well, you should change and adapt quickly to find one that works better. When you’re a startup, you need to hold true to your core vision, but one of your key advantages over larger or more established companies is being able to change and adapt the execution of that vision, so take advantage of that.

Juetten: And of course, any IP horror stories to share (they can be anonymous)?

Caputo: Be careful who you partner with. If you’re a startup, you don’t really have litigation available as an option, especially against entrenched interests. Share enough for people to be excited, but hold back some of the things that are really important. Keep key aspects about the IP reserved, and if someone tries to follow you, then will have to play catch up. While people generally are kind and honest, unfortunately there are people that do take advantage, and we have heard of cases where they rake you over the coals for a deal, and if you don’t accept it take your property and compete against you.

Juetten: What’s the long-term vision for your company?

Caputo: Changing the industry for the better. Bringing back ownership to gamers and control to developers in such a way that enables the best parts of the industry to thrive, like student funds. We would like to see developers and innovators have the flexibility to build and create unique digital products like limited editions where a developer could sell three editions of every game, two are limited and one is platinum. We look to progressively break down barriers at the level of game distribution to have more than just five game clients to choose from. We are currently locked up in digital boxes, mobile games, for example, are completely dominated by the main app stores on each platform. A path forward could be a more open way that Microsoft, Sony, and their consoles all interact through an interoperable medium. For us, the future is an open and universal licensing network, where I can buy the game and play it on any console, pc, or mobile device. In our model, digital creators can develop content for games, items like skins and avatars. These digital creators would be rewarded for the content they produced, and could make a living by selling their digital work to the gaming ecosystem. At the same time, we want to maximize creativity while not taking control away from the developer, who we reward for allowing others to build upon their innovation. In summary, we’re building an open licensing framework that tears down walled gardens, and, like with electric cars, people just don’t realize there’s more money to be made using an open model.

My hope is that these stories about real founders, that are not creating Unicorns, can inspire and help other founders. If you have an interesting journey to share, particularly with IP considerations, please reach out on Twitter @maryjuetten. #onwards.

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