#I have a lot of feelings about mass effect and know no one that plays it
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I think a lot about Shepard's fish tank wipeout in the Citadel DLC.
The entire DLC is this lighthearted love letter to Mass Effect, and it's beautiful. But then there's THIS moment. When Shepard falls through a fish tank.
The entire way down, they desperately try to arrest their fall. They have no shields. No combat armor. There is no one to catch them. It feels like this is one of the few times there is ever fear. And they don't land gently. And the cut scene lingers on it. There is no levity in this moment. Shepard is on the ground, groaning in pain, slow to get up, clutching their ribs. First instinct before they try to get to their feet? Reach for the gun. Have that first. Then see if you can stand.
And I think the only reason we can have this moment, where Shepard is vulnerable, injured, and in trouble, is because there is no one there to see. The moment Brooks gets on the comm, they crack a joke. "Yup. Feeling good." While unable to stand up straight.
We get this at the end of the game, too, but that's when the stakes are at their highest. That's when it's supposed to be hard. It's no less magnificent then, but now, in this moment? When everything was happy and fun and silly? MAN.
And afterward, everyone jokes about it. Every single member of your squad makes a crack about the sushi place. And Shepard plays along. Haha, yeah, fell right through it, while trying to change the subject.
No one knows what that fall was like. No one saw Shepard lying on the ground in the bowls of the Silversun Strip, water dripping off them, struggling to get to their feet.
And no one asks, because it's Shepard.
#mass effect#commander shepard#i have a lot of feelings about this#mass effect meta#citadel dlc is the best dlc
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i’d once read a Mass Effect take that has been stewing in my melon ever since, about Wrex and him demanding a cure for the genophage during the war in 3. (I think it was on twitter but I can’t remember for sure. Just the idea of it stuck with me.)
The general sentiment was that this was a dick move on his part, that there were “bigger problems” and this wasn’t the time and it was cruel and manipulative of him to put Shepard in that position. He should have helped out first and Shepard would have helped him back once the war was over. A lot of people chimed in agreeing, saying how they stopped liking Wrex after that.
It bothered me for a bunch of reasons I didn’t feel I could adequately articulate, but i’m gonna try now. Prepare for my meandering thought style!
The governing bodies of the Mass Effect Galaxy have repeatedly proven that they believe themselves superior to other species and know what’s best for everyone. They don’t let all species have a say in the council, always look out for their own species’ interests in so much as it pertains to keeping things as they are, and will happily go along with literal genocide to aid this. They approve of secret police and biological warfare espionage tactics. They weaponise bureaucracy to hide their cruelty behind ‘oh red tape has us bound, sorry uwu’.
I’m going to try to remain pertinent to the Wrex subject but as one great example of these governing bodies ways of dealing with percieved outsiders: The first contact war is a great example of how ludicrous and fascist things are.. ‘It’s ilegal to use this thing so we’re going to kill you for it’ without so much as a heads up. How were humans supposed to know that, exactly? The governing bodies of this place do not care about anyone outside their own self interests. Fall out of line and they will work to end you. Until you prove you might be useful or of interest to them in some way (or a threat). And then of course we later learn the asari were breaking these laws themselves, hoarding this tech to stay superior. Classic.
Anyway, back to Wrex. Wrex knows this. Wrex has seen how the krogan are regarded and treated, the dangerous monolith species, outsiders who can never be let in, never forgiven, never given a chance to grow or change. For a long arse time.
“But the krogan were getting out of control and also committing genocide, the genophage was a last ditch resort to stop a galactic war”
… And it’s been hundreds of years since then. That 'last ditch resort' wasn’t used as a stop gap, a reset to even out the playing field so that new negotiations and relations could be developed. It was used to end the krogan, and has been actively maintained to continue that, ever since.
Do you really, truly believe that if Wrex petitioned the council/ world leaders to negotiate reversing the genophage, they’d even let him have an audience with them? And if they did, do you really think these people, with their history and all the shit they pull, would listen and be reasonable? I can already hear the responses, that weaponised bureaucracy (“you raise an interesting point Mr Wrex but unfortunately we are recovering from a war don’t you know, please come back in 300 years for review, we are very interested in discussing this further then!”)
Wrex is old, wise and knows exactly what is up. The only way the governing bodies of power were ever going to have a listen, was if he had something they needed. The war with the reapers provided that. And even then, he knew that they wouldn’t listen outright; having Shepard’s voice was a way to get the foot in the door. It makes my heart hurt to think about that honestly; how dehumanising (dekroganising?) it must feel to be the ruler of your people and know that you have to rely on your alien friend to even get someone to listen to you, when what you want to say is an extremely reasonable “hey committing genoicde against my people sucks, stop that now”.
Anyway, Wrex was right, this was his one chance to save his people and he took it. Good for him.
#mass effect#urdnot wrex#wrex#my hot take of the day#I usually avoid hot takes because discourse is exhausting#but this one has been revolving in my mind for like a year since I read it#and I read that great post about how dystopian mass effects governments are earlier and my mind has THOUGHTS now
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THG is the only pop culture story I can think of where the heroes (Katniss and Peeta) are disabled* and their happy ending doesn't require that they be "fixed" in order to be happy. IMO, part of why there's such controversy over the ending of the books in particular is that Collins wrote the pov of Katniss as a woman who is content and loves her life and her spouse and kids, but she's still very clearly mentally ill (and arguably somewhere on the spectrum). She has coping strategies and her life is good, but she will never be "normal" and Collins doesn't let the audience think that.
The one part, where she talks about how she handles the darker days, when she's really struggling, never fails to move me:
I’ll tell them that on bad mornings, it feels impossible to take pleasure in anything because I’m afraid it could be taken away. That’s when I make a list in my head of every act of goodness I’ve seen someone do. It’s like a game. Repetitive. Even a little tedious after more than twenty years. But there are much worse games to play. (Mockingjay, 332)
It's hard to express how important that is to me. Someone doesn't have to be "normal" to lead a good life. Someone doesn't have to be "normal" to have a life worth living, to give and receive love in good ways.
And, so, when people look at the villain in the prequel and say "he's just crazy, that's why he's evil. He's just a psycho, he's nuts," it's so out of place, it's so dissonant to me -- I think that's absolutely not the kind of story Collins would tell, given her prior handling of disability.
I don't think she's suddenly turned into a Victorian writer where you can know someone is evil because they're disabled because the writer thinks disabled people are warped creatures incapable of doing anything but bringing evil into the world. And the way people assert this, as if it's the pure, wholesome, most politically advanced reading of the prequel, is just - it doesn't compute for me. I don't understand how people get there.
I studied (for years) the treatment of mentally ill people in the mid-20th Century US. It was horrific. US forced sterilization and eugenics laws actually inspired N/azi Germany's forced sterilization, eugenics, and mass murder campaigns against mentally ill and disabled people. Nice, normal people have repeatedly convinced themselves that torturing and killing disabled people is how they will "purify" their society - they've done great evil in the name of rooting out the people evil is supposedly located within biologically.
Is it so hard to believe that people with normal brains do evil? Is it truly so impossible? Even in a story where the Games are about how a lot of people, the majority of whom are neurotypical, can be brought, via media presentation and entertainment techniques, into taking pleasure in their participation in evil? It's so hard to fathom that evil can't simply be located in someone being "psycho"?
Ballad already has Dr Gaul, who is evil and clearly neurodivergent. If Snow is too then the message starts to get kind of worrying? IMO, Coriolanus is more effective as a kind of “everyman” as an 18 year old - an example of the incentive structures (rewards and punishments) and propaganda that motivate “normal” people to go along. Of course, he will later become something far worse than that, someone who takes control of this thing, who uses his intimate knowledge of it and his insight into other “normal” people to make it worse, but that’s not the part of his life we see the most of. The part the book focuses on provides what I consider a powerful depiction of how ordinary people are acculturated into corrupt societies.
It's fiction so there's all kinds of interpretations that the text can support and exploring those is good. It's a stronger text because it has ambiguities and can be interpreted more than one way. But the intensity of some of the rhetoric is an unsettling contrast to what I've thought, for over a decade, Collins' themes and pov are as a writer.
*Shame on the films for removing Peeta's physical disability, though; in the books he lost a leg during their first Games
#thg meta#my meta#i'm gonna try to leave it at this now - i don't want to keep letting this bother me so much#the hunger games#the ballad of songbirds and snakes#maybe Coriolanus Snow is the evil neurotypical representation we need lol#i'm going to unsubscribe from the reddit i think#that is where i am seeing a lot of this#and it's just not worth it
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Hello
I am once again rambling about neat details in Mass Effect everybody already knew except me.
I was playing the ending of the Citadel DLC a while ago, the part where the Normandy is getting stolen, and because this is the only mission in the game you can have Wrex as a party member, of course I took him. However, due to some irl stuff I wasn't fully vibing with the mission. So after the irl stuff got sorted, I decided to replay it. I took Wrex along for most of the archive part of the mission, but when it came to rescuing the Normandy, for shits and giggles I took EDI with me because I wondered if she'd get any unique dialogue.
and it turns out she gets... a LOT of unique dialogue. Like a RIDICULOUS amount. So much so that from now on she's gonna be the default squaddie for this mission when I replay again.
The initial almost joke scene where she glitches out for a second before rebooting and going "I'M OK!" was great and honestly that's the most I was expecting for taking her along. But there's a bunch of other stuff too. They went so far as to make that little orange hologram she has flicker and die when her control of the Normandy is shut down (which she's greatly distressed by when it first happens). And the orange band remains gone the entire mission until she's given control back
The mission running up to the Normandy and shooting Mercs has her basically screaming for blood the entire time which is probably the most emotion I've ever heard her give.
"I AM THE NORMANDY! AND I WILL KILL EVERY LAST ONE OF YOU!"
Fuck yeah babe, you tell 'em!
But I also like the extra detail it adds. The Normandy DOES NOT WANT to be stolen. The Normandy ITSELF is like "FUCK YOU ASSHOLES!!! NOBODY GETS TO STEAL ME BUT SHEPARD!!!" The Normandy ITSELF is outraged at this bullshit and the sheer fucking audacity.
When trying to open the airlock, Shepard actually asks EDI if she can do anything and she openly laments she has no control nor does she know what's going on. So much so Garrus has to give her moral support which I did not know he would do if you bring EDI.
Furthermore, when riding the elevator to the cargo hold, Garrus more or less asks EDI how she's holding up, and EDI comments she feels like she's walking around blind. Garrus gives further support and sympathy telling her then it's only fair she take some revenge on these assholes and EDI is very 🥺 about it.
When you do the final fight in the cargo bay, you can hear EDI raging every now and then, and one line hits me is her more or less screaming "You betrayed my crew! You violated my trust! You violated my body!! I am going to KILL ALL OF YOU!!" [paraphrasing] which is kind of horrifying for her and makes me feel even worse for her than I did already when I never took her along before.
Finally, after the fight, Shepard asks EDI if she's in control again which she does even if you didn't take EDI along, but when she's standing in front of you, not only does EDI confirm she's in control again, but she actually adds with a smile "thank you for asking".
THERE'S JUST A LOT OF EXTRA SHIT I NEVER KNEW ABOUT!!!!! THERE'S SO MUCH JUICY CONTENT AND IMPLICATIONS AND LAYERS HERE AND I JUST NEVER FUCKING KNEW ABOUT ANY OF IT BECAUSE I LIKE WREX TOO MUCH!!!
Anyway, those are my thoughts about this mission I'm sure literally everyone knew about back in 2013 except for me.
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i think i followed you Back In The Day, seven years and seven blogs ago, for something related to mass effect (zaeed? maybe? who could say) and it's wild to come back to this site years later and find you thriving, surviving, growing-- playing ffxiv! love that game. curious how you'll feel about some side characters in shadowbringers, but i won't spoil which ones.
i do have real questions, though; writing tools. not pens or software, but personal structure tools and/or guidance. what does a beat sheet look like, for you? do you have a favored way of outlining or note-taking on your own thoughts when putting a story together?
and... i'm really curious how you hold a big story together in your head while you work on it in pieces, especially for something like dangerous crowns. there's this larger story i've been chasing around for a while, and I can't quite wrap my head around how to write the political/espionage plot for it without feeling like i've actually written a children's pantomime. the best i've got so far is "research real life events and use those as my outline" but after a point it becomes hard to keep track of all the variables of who knows what about whom, who is planning x when y, etc, etc. the characters don't need to know all that-- and may never know some things-- but i feel like /I/ need to understand what's happening on the macro level so i can move the world around them appropriately.
short version: how do YOU wrap your head around writing complex plots?
hey, anon! i started endwalker this week after a long... uh... glamour detour, so don't worry about spoiling things. i spoil myself for a lot of stories on purpose anyway. let's just say i've been attached to one too many characters who got killed.
anyway. writing. i've always handled plots the same way: clear documentation. if i don't note it down, i'm not going to remember it. i've used the same table outline since around 2014. it varies in detail for different projects, but the core format stays. i know it's kicking around in my blog archive somewhere, but it's worth reposting once in a while because people like to ask about it. here's what it looks like, featuring plot points cribbed from an endeavour episode:
i used this format for an outline at work a while back, and the team found it easy to follow, which was a big day for my ego. keeping track of plot structure is even more chaotic at work because we have multiple writers who all need to stay on the same page. we have very meticulous notes on what the player should know at which point, when we're introducing new information, and what we know, but shouldn't tell. we're also not above leaving notes like "this character has to convey X," "this character has to learn Y here," or "this is a clue that they're planning Z." it can be super on-the-nose. all that matters is that it makes sense to you. because you're right - if you get too lost, you can write yourself into logic holes of tremendous proportions. ask me how i know!
[as a sidenote, researching real-life events as a starting point has really grown on me in the past few years. my lead on coh3 had me do it. he said we were dealing with real people's history, so we couldn't be cheap or play fastball - we had to be accurate to pay it respect. even if you're not writing historical fiction, it just gives you insight into how people behave.]
i would argue that the plot of dangerous crowns is actually not that complicated, maybe to its detriment. there's kind of a genre struggle going on. at voltage, we were taught romance fans came for the relationship beats and valued them above all else. in fact, leadership told us players got irritated - which meant less sales - when the plot was too complex and took time away from the making out. political thriller fans, by contrast, expect relentless twists, high stakes, and harsh consequences, and sometimes see the relationships as superfluous.
but whatever. the point is, when you look at dangerous crowns' structure, it's a pearl necklace: a chain of anchoring events. the "pearl" scenes are where Big Plot happens. they're the reason you want to write the story, and probably the ones you have the most vivid daydreams about. the scenes in between are the string. not flashy, but important because they connect the pearls. they build tension and add logic, cohesion, and context. take the opera and hector's failed assassination. those are pearl scenes. that's a burst of drama i really wanted the story to build up to. i also had other flashbulb visions. livia by the fountain questioning herself, marcus' macbeth moment, the temple riot, things like that. so the question was, how could i believably travel between these pearl scenes? how could i make these big showcase moments connect smoothly?
if you're having trouble holding the story together in your head, i would ask, "what are your pearls?" what are the anchor points? outline those. it might not look like a necklace yet, but you'll sort of see it taking shape. and then, once you can see where your heart's-desire milestones are, you'll have a clearer idea of what can't fire until you set it up first. two other neat things can happen here. you could find the rhythm of your pacing, or realize you have a lot more plot meat than you thought you did. even if you don't, you have some road. and if you can't think of the string, sometimes you just have to start writing the pearls and see what comes to you.
good luck!!
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REACTION IMAGES BLOG PATCH NOTES (aka the 10k follower celebrations got out of hand)
Hey everyone!
So it's been a hot minute since I announced that we passed 10,000 followers on here! I'm sure... well, I'm actually sure that most people won't be TOO fussed either way, but I did say I was gonna do some stuff, and I wanna stick to my word if nothing else xD
So! Let the celebrations begin! Firstly, I'm announcing a new QnA (I love those things) that'll last,,,, I'll say 2 weeks and go from there. Feel free to ask me about whatever you want!! If you want to cater to me specifically, my current big interests are Baldur's Gate 3, Cyberpunk 2077, Mass Effect, and uuuuh Halo. (Also Bionicle remains a constant.) (Lots of scifi videogame stuff at the moment...)
[IK there's still some stuff in the inbox I need to answer/respond to you - I promise I'll get to those as well <3 thank you so much for your patience, if you've been waiting]
Secondly, here's a new song cover! IDK how many of you have played the game Divinity: Original Sin 2, but here's me singing Lohse's song; Sing For Me.
Thirdly: here's a new gimmick blog! I Was Not Joking. (Though, for my sanity, it's gonna be weekly instead of daily.) I'll be posting the images I have saved in my folder called 'feral screenshots' - it'll basically be a collection of cursed images/images with strange auras. I wanna say y'all know the ones, but if you don't, then here's an example of what we're dealing with:
[Image ID: a person floating in a rubber ring in a swimming pool. On their head is what looks like a life-size Lego head.]
Introduciiiiing the Weekly Weird Images blog!
And Fourthly! It is my great pleasure to announce that we're adding alt text to all the images on this blog! Sorry it took so long to get round to T_T
And yes - I do mean we! To write out all the alt text for these images, I've on-boarded minion-in-chief/court jester aplomb @tizzytinkertilly! I (the reaction images guy) will still be handling every other part of the blog - she'll just be doing that bit. For the sake of my sanity xD
This is kind of a big change - both the addition of alt text, and the fact that this blog is no longer a single-person operation - so for the foreseeable future, the queue's been tweaked so that we only post 2 images a day instead of 4. (Fun fact! 2 images a day was the original MO of this blog, and then covid happened and I was like "I'll make it 4 a day because it'll be a nice thing to do for everyone while they're miserable in this pandemic :)" and then I never stopped (although you could argue that the pandemic never stopped either).) Maybe if/when we fall into a good routine and feel like we can do more, we can bump the rate of images back up, but right now this is a teething phase and I'm keen to slow things down for a little bit. :P (Tumblr has made some WEIRD mechanical choices for group blogs, I'll be honest.)
And, uh, yeah, that's all! Let the QnA begin- Hope y'all enjoy the song cover- Hope y'all enjoy the additional blog- A big welcome to Tinks and to alt text! Happy 10k followers, everybody!
#bwaaaaaah I can finally post this#It's taken way longer than it probably should have to get all of this together#Personally I blame executive dysfunction#but HOORAAY we're here now#not a pic#10k extravabonganza
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Crash Landing
SUMMARY | You meet Jungwoo in a space station and you both instantly hit it off.
PAIRING | Jungwoo/Reader
GENRE | space theme au, smut with little (?) plot, unprotected sex (wrap it up everyone!), oral sex (both male/female receiving/giving), general perversion
RATING | Mature
LENGTH | 6,466 words
AUTHOR’S NOTE | Debating on making a part 2 or like a space theme series or something. Like I don’t think I’ve delved deep enough into the space lore haha. Was it weird to have that space/alien fight in the middle of the chapter? No idea. I’ve played to much Mass Effect lately so I was kind of, sort of, inspired to write this.
What do ya’ll think? A part 2 or like a series? Maybe a different pairing? IDK lol.
You open your eyes and stared at the white interior of the suite you inhabited. All white with no colors...how boring. You let out a sigh and swung your feet over the bed, not having slept for nearly two days straight. Even after a nap of a few hours, you were still very tired.
You walked towards the door of your room, the automatic door opening when you reached it. As you stepped out of your suite, you peered down the halls of the space station that you were residing in until your next mission could be scheduled. Nothing interesting ever happened on board this station; people came and went, making it their home base while they completed various missions all over the galaxy, but most didn't even spend more than a week here before they were off again. It was just an orbital station that housed different ships when they weren't traveling around.
However, when people came here, they usually came to be seen by many other space travelers and scientists as well as rich merchants who wanted to conduct business deals in private areas and who had lots of money to do so. For these reasons, it was quite crowded.
"Maybe I'll go stop by the bar and see if there's any exciting events happening." You thought aloud to yourself as you made your way through the corridors towards the main lobby.
You continued walking until you entered the main room where the bar stood. Although you hadn't been able to spot anything remotely interesting, you hoped that maybe you'd find something tonight. You walked up to the counter and ordered a drink, the bartender knowing exactly what you wanted since he had served you before and already knew your preferences. He soon handed you your drink, leaning against the counter as his co-worker manned the bar.
"Anything interesting happened? Do you know?" You asked the bartender, noticing his gaze shift from you to the wall behind him, likely looking for news. The bartender chuckled lightly and shook his head.
"Nothing really. We have a couple of freighter pilots from one of the smaller colonies arriving later today to sign paperwork, but other than that, nothing much is going on here."
You nodded in understanding, sitting down at a nearby table as you began sipping on your drink. A feeling of boredom consumed you once again as you sat there, your thoughts drifting away into a distant land. After a short time, the bartender placed another drink in front of you.
"Thanks." You said, smiling slightly at the bartender as you took another sip of your drink. You began wondering about something and looked around the room. Not seeing anyone that might help, you spoke out loud. "Hey..."
The bartender immediately turned his attention back to you and smiled. "Yeah?"
"I'm wondering...do you have any other information that might be useful? I came for adventure and just being stuck in Neo Station for too long is making me a little stir crazy."
"Hmm, what kind of adventures are you wanting to get into?" The bartender curiously asked.
"Oh, just some sort of excitement. Anything would do, really." You said cheerfully. "Do you happen to know of anyone that might have a job for me? I am an experienced fighter and strategist. I can pretty much take on any mission if it comes to it."
"Not that I know. But maybe one of the merchants might know." The bartender said. "Oh, Neo Security might have some jobs if you're inclined to get into those sorts of things. They don't pay much, though."
"I'm not so worried about the pay," you laughed as you made your way out of the bar. "It's all about the adventure and experience!"
You quickly made your way outside, stepping onto the walkway towards the large window of the station. Before you got to the window however, you stopped, gazing out into space for a moment, admiring how beautiful it truly was. All of the stars, planets, nebulas and countless other galaxies stretched far out beyond the reaches of human sight, each individual one unique in its own way. It was amazing to think that each star system contained life forms, from tiny single cell organisms to the huge, multi-planeted species like yourselves.
The possibilities seemed endless.
"It's beautiful, isn't it?" A male voice said next to you.
You looked up to see a very handsome male looking out the large window with you. You blushed softly as you gazed upon him, instantly becoming more attracted to him than you were to most others, although you tried your best to hide it. You smiled at him and spoke. "Yes, it is beautiful. So vast. I feel like I've only scratched the surface of everything that's out there."
He smiled at you, nodding. "Indeed. Humans will never fully understand how large our universe actually is, and I don't believe we'll ever reach it. But I guess that's why we should appreciate it as much as we can now."
You both stared out into space, listening to the noises coming from the station filled with human and alien species alike. After a minute or two, you turned back to face him. "I'm Y/N, by the way."
"Jungwoo. Nice to meet you, Y/N." Jungwoo said, extending his hand towards you.
You smiled at him and took his hand in yours. "Likewise, Jungwoo."
"So, what are you doing out here alone, Y/N?" Jungwoo questioned.
You shrugged and sighed, not meeting Jungwoo's eyes. "I'm bored and haven't done anything interesting lately."
"Really? What kinds of things do you normally do?" Jungwoo inquired.
"Well, normally I would go exploring a new planet and look for animals and plant life that humans have yet to discover. All the while, making sure humanity is safe and keeping the peace. Unfortunately, since my ship is in maintenance right now, there aren't many places to go." You replied sadly. "And I have no idea where my crew went."
Jungwoo nodded in understanding, a smile on his face. "I understand completely. My crew always has trouble finding places to explore whenever we visit a new planet, either because we're restricted or we just simply run out of places to look."
"That's why I love exploration. You just never know what you're going to find, do you?" You grinned widely.
Jungwoo grinned back at you and shook his head. "No, you don't. That's what makes it fun!"
After exchanging pleasantries, you and Jungwoo spent the rest of the night talking about your hobbies and interests, trying to make conversation and pass the time until your ship was repaired. At the end of the evening, Jungwoo gave you his number in case you needed a companion or company on future excursions.
"Thank you for talking with me tonight, Jungwoo. It really helped pass the time." You said happily, giving him a kiss on the cheek.
He grabbed your wrist gently, stopping you from leaving. "Let me ask you something first." He stated firmly.
You frowned and furrowed your eyebrows. "Okay. What is it?"
Jungwoo ran his thumb along the inside of your wrist. "Are you just as attracted to me as I am to you? Because if you are, then maybe this night doesn't have to end right here."
Your heart skipped a beat and your breath caught in your throat. Your mind began racing with a million different possibilities, many of them leading to unspeakable sexual encounters between the two of you. You felt the heat rise in your cheeks and Jungwoo noticed.
"Y/N?" He inquired, giving you a warm smile.
You nodded slowly, unable to speak. Jungwoo leaned closer, closing the gap between your lips. With a soft moan escaping your mouth, your lips parted slightly and Jungwoo slid his tongue across your lips, gently stroking it before you slowly opened your mouth. His tongue darted into your mouth, exploring every inch, as you kissed him back eagerly.
Jungwoo pulled away, grinning widely. "So? Are you just as attracted to me as I am to you?"
You looked at him, a coy grin forming on your face. "I think you know the answer to that question, Jungwoo."
"Good." He whispered softly. "Because you are extremely attractive."
A blush appeared on your face, making you become flushed as Jungwoo slowly backed away, running his fingers through his hair as he looked at you with lustful eyes. No one else was around but you grabbed his hand and led him towards your suite.
"Where are we going?" Jungwoo whispered as he followed you closely, still clutching your hand tightly.
"You'll see in a minute." You replied as you led him towards your suite.
When you got inside, you pushed Jungwoo against the nearest wall, kissing him passionately as you unbuttoned his shirt and pulled it off of him. Once you got it removed, you glanced at his chest and gasped softly.
"What is it?" He breathed softly, looking down at you.
You gazed up at him and whispered, "I love your body."
Jungwoo smirked and bit down gently on your bottom lip. "Has it been awhile since you had someone?"
"A long ass while," You moaned as his fingers trailed down your sides. "My squadmates not included. They never satisfied me sexually, which is a big part of what drives me to seek companionship elsewhere."
Jungwoo chuckled as he bent down to kiss you. "If you want, I could make sure you were completely satisfied. In fact, I guarantee it."
You smiled seductively at him, sliding your hands up his arms. "Can you?"
"You bet I can. Just give me permission." Jungwoo gazed down at you.
You smiled, leaning forward and pressing your lips against his, softly kissing him back. You pulled back after a few moments and nibbled on his lower lip. Jungwoo growled softly, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you closer. You melted into him as he wrapped his arms around you tightly, guiding you backwards until your knees hit the bed.
You looked into his dark brown eyes and moved your lips over his. His kisses were gentle at first, but as they grew deeper, his kisses became passionate and urgent, wanting to devour your entire body. You responded, running your hands up and down his chest as he explored your body with his. You moaned softly as his hands slid underneath your shirt and caressed your bare skin. You looked into his eyes as he continued touching you, watching the passion growing within them. As his touches became bolder, your breathing became heavier. When he finally pulled your shirt off, you groaned loudly, your hands going to the buttons of his pants.
Once you had them undone, you reached inside and found his hardened member. He moaned in pleasure as you stroked him slowly, gently squeezing and moving his shaft around. Jungwoo closed his eyes, enjoying the sensations you were giving him. When he opened his eyes again, he saw that you were staring into his eyes intently. You lowered your head, pressing your lips against his erect penis, licking the tip of it gently. He moaned deeply as you did this. He grabbed your head and brought you closer, encouraging you to continue.
As you licked and sucked on him more aggressively, he let out a small whimper, tugging on your hair roughly. You moaned, continuing to work his penis with your hand, sucking harder on him. His moans grew louder and more intense as he pressed himself even harder into your mouth. Finally, when he couldn't take anymore, he pulled away, painting your face with his cum.
You licked his cum off of your lips, grinning as you watched his facial expressions. "Did I satisfy you?" You asked slyly.
"Oh god yes," He gasped, moving down your body to help discard the rest of your clothes. "And now it's your turn to be satisfied..."
"How was your rest, captain?" Haechan, your engineer, asked as he checked the equipment around you.
"Fine, thanks." You replied. "I finally managed to sleep after those two grueling days of not sleeping at all. How about you?"
Haechan shrugged. "I slept alright, I suppose. I was still tossing and turning a bit, but I managed to fall asleep eventually."
"At least you managed to sleep!" Renjun, your pilot and navigator, called from the cockpit. "Me, I was just laying there staring at the ceiling and trying to count sheep. Tried to stay awake all day yesterday, but I failed miserably. There's nothing worse than being extremely exhausted and then not being able to sleep at all!"
"Tell me about it." Winwin, your medic, added as he tried to stifle a yawn. "As soon as I try to sleep, my mind starts racing with ideas and worries and I can't get rid of them. I've been waking up every hour or so and laying awake for awhile, only to finally drift off to sleep again after a few hours."
Everyone paused in their work for a brief moment to discuss how they all slept. It was nice to hear that everyone else was struggling with similar issues. At least you weren't alone. You let out a small chuckle, watching as Haechan and Renjun bickered quietly.
"Where's the rest of the team?" You inquired, looking around. Everyone else seemed busy with their duties and you couldn't see anyone else.
"They went to collect some cargo." Winwin replied, reading off a holographic screen that displayed the list of supplies that they needed to gather. "I think Mark and Jaehyun went to get some weapons and armor while Doyoung and Taeyong went to collect medical supplies. Johnny went to stock up on food."
"And Jaemin? Where is he?" You asked.
Haechan chuckled, shaking his head. "Weird kid doesn't seem interested in helping us gather supplies. Seems like he wants to go take care of something else first. Maybe he found a cute little animal he wants to bring back."
Everyone chuckled at this.
"If that's the case, then I hope it isn't a rat or something." Renjun said, pointing his finger at Haechan. "I'm tired of him always bringing back rodents and bugs as pets."
You let out a sigh. "Hey, as long as he doesn't shoot me and his squadmates in the back, I don't care. Let the weird kids do whatever they want, as long as they're helpful. Don't worry, we won't hold it against them."
Everyone slowly nodded their heads and resumed their tasks, which included cleaning and setting up various supplies in preparation for the upcoming expedition. You let out a sigh of relief as you worked alongside your crewmates. At least everything was getting done. As you finished organizing the rest of the supplies, you sent a message to everyone.
"Alright guys, we're almost ready. Everything seems to be set up and in order. Should be going out soon. Crew, keep an eye out for anything suspicious or unusual, okay? Squad, arm yourself with your weaponry and be prepared for battle."
You heard a series of responses throughout the ship, everyone agreeing to your instructions and telling you they were ready for the task ahead.
Finally, you heard your squadmate and science officer, Doyoung, reply. "We're ready, captain! Weapons are loaded and all equipment is operational. We're waiting on everyone else to finish gathering supplies before we leave."
With everyone on board, you gave the signal to launch the vessel, and it began floating upwards into space. Once it had cleared the station, you gave the command to accelerate and left the station behind.
You were mindlessly walking around your ship, performing maintenance and such when you heard someone call your name. Looking up, you saw Johnny, one of your squadmates and your second-in-command, standing at the door to the bridge, wearing a wide grin on his face. "So I heard that you met someone new yesterday. Any details?"
You chuckled at his teasing and shook your head. "Who's asking?"
"You met someone?" Mark, another squadmate and everythingman, asked as he joined Johnny in the doorway. "I thought you were staying in your suite all day?"
"I stopped by the bar last night and met this guy." You explained, walking into the bridge. "Why are you all suddenly curious about who I met? Scared that I might run off with him or something?"
"And leave this wonderful crew behind? No way." Taeyong, the cook and cultural advisor, chimed in. "Come on, tell us about this mysterious man. Did ya'll fuck?"
"Oh come on, none of you will even admit to being jealous that I may have met someone else?" You said, rolling your eyes.
Jaehyun, a squadmate and quartermaster, immediately shook his head and held up his hands in protest. "Not me! Honest! Of course I'd be happy for you if you met someone."
Renjun glared at Jaehyun. "Says the guy that always wants to fuck Y/N after a mission."
Haechan raised an eyebrow and smiled at Renjun. "And you know this because..."
"I have eyes and ears." Renjun scoffed. "Jaehyun's always sniffing around Y/N after missions, so naturally I've seen and heard quite a bit."
You rubbed your temples. You were the only female amongst a crew and squad of horny males. It was a wonder any of you could maintain a level head at all times. Fortunately, you hadn't encountered too many difficulties with your relationships. Sure, you've slept with some of your squadmates, but you've never gotten emotionally attached to anyone.
Not yet, anyway.
You looked around the bridge, watching your crew and squadmates interact with each other. They were all so friendly and caring, despite their varying backgrounds and personalities. You had originally been afraid of interacting with the rest of your crew, considering your coveted status as a Neo operative and the constant scrutiny that came along with it. However, it seemed like none of that mattered to the others. They welcomed you with open arms, accepting you for who you were. And you were glad for that. You didn't need any special treatment. Just to be treated as an equal, and you felt like they did just that. You wouldn't trade these people for anything.
"Hey," you said softly, causing everyone to turn and look at you. "You guys are the best crew and squad that I could ever ask for. I wouldn't trade you guys or run off with any other team for the world. We've been through a lot of shit together, and I couldn't imagine doing this without you."
A smile broke across all of their faces, their smiles growing wider as they watched you continue speaking.
"And even though we haven't known each other very long, you've become family to me. And I'm thankful that you're willing to put up with me and my bullshit."
"The amount of trouble you put us through," Jaemin, another squadmate and technician, laughed, holding his stomach. "But hey, we're used to it by now."
Johnny punched Jaemin in the shoulder playfully. "And you love every second of it."
Everyone continued laughing and joking with each other as you made your way over to the main console to start checking on all the systems on the ship. The others joined you as you inspected and ran tests on various components, making sure everything was working properly. While you were focused on monitoring the systems, a notification appeared on the holographic display next to you.
"Captain, one of our sensors detected something out of the ordinary coming from the surface of the planet below." Haechan called out. "It looks like the coordinates for a shuttle bay. Something strange is definitely going on."
You stood up and walked towards the viewport. All the other members of your crew gathered around you, curiously watching as you peered down onto the planet below.
"There's no doubt about it." You muttered. "Something's wrong down there."
You watched intently as you saw the faint outline of a spaceship hovering above the shuttle bay. You could barely make out what the thing was; it was far away and it was hard to distinguish. But you knew exactly what it was. You were intimately familiar with every spaceship design that existed within the Alliance.
This wasn't one of the Alliance ships. It wasn't even close. You had no idea where this thing had come from, but there was no doubt that it wasn't friendly. A shiver passed through your body, causing you to lean closer to the viewing window.
"Renjun, take us closer to the shuttle bay." You ordered. "Get us as close as possible without getting shot down."
"Copy that, captain." He responded.
"Doyoung and Taeyong, initiate the ships defense. Make sure we aren't caught off guard." You added.
"On it." Doyoung confirmed.
"Haechan, begin a scan on the area. Find out what we're dealing with."
"Got it." Haechan responded.
"Winwin, standby unless needed." You instructed your medic. You turned back to the rest of your crew. "The rest of you, loadout all weapons and equipment. Arm yourselves and get ready for battle. Squad, let's go find ourselves some answers."
Your orders were quickly carried out, and you and your team silently headed out of the room and down the hallway to the hangar deck. When you reached the bottom floor, you opened the large doors and stepped outside, followed by the rest of your squad. You and your squadmates took up defensive positions as you scanned the area with your visors.
It was then that you spotted several black dots moving around in the distance. They seemed to be approaching the shuttle bay and were probably heading inside.
"Scans indicate that there are four lifeforms nearby." Doyoung reported. "Two of them appear to be armed with standard rifles and pistols, the other two are carrying automatic assault rifles. No idea what they are."
You glanced over at your squad. Their expressions were grim. Not only were you uncertain about whether these beings would be friendly, but you weren't even entirely sure how dangerous they were.
"Alright everyone," you began. "Standby and be alert. We'll figure this out as fast as we can. In the meantime, just stay quiet and wait for my commands."
They all nodded their heads in understanding and stood perfectly still, waiting for further instruction.
As the black dots approached, you began taking careful steps backwards. They seemed harmless enough, but you were not taking any chances. One wrong move and it could lead to disaster. Fortunately, the other members of your squad stayed alert and were able to act accordingly. When the black dots were close enough, a series of bullets zipped past you, narrowly missing you. Without hesitation, the aliens fired back, riddling the surface of your ship with blaster bolts.
"Fuck!" Mark cursed loudly. "These things aren't fucking around!"
"Mark, Jaehyun! To the left! Johnny, Jaemin! To the right! Come on, move!" You yelled. Your squad instantly complied and moved swiftly, ducking and weaving between the different sets of walls, leaving the invaders exposed. A few more shots rang out, tearing apart pieces of the hull and a couple of windows. You were lucky that your shields absorbed most of the damage, otherwise it could have been catastrophic.
"Okay, let's move. Squad, split up and cover all sides. We don't want these guys sneaking up on us while we're spread out."
"On it, captain!" Both Jaemin and Jaehyun acknowledged. As the squad split up, you moved towards the closest wall and crouched down, allowing your bulk to shield you from any stray blaster bolts. After listening closely, you determined that the enemy was on the other side of the building, trying to figure out where you and your crew were hiding.
You grabbed a grenade launcher and waited for your comrades to return to their posts before setting off towards the closest wall. You slowly peeked over the top of the building, your eyes trained on the other side. Several of the black dots were crouching behind the outer walls, apparently looking for you. However, the rest of them were either huddled together or stood alone in small groups, watching the building, almost as if they expected you to come out of hiding.
Taking careful aim, you lobbed the grenade towards the building where the majority of the black dots were located. You threw it as hard as you could and prayed that it would do some damage. When the grenade exploded, all hell broke loose. Dozens of blasts rang out, and several of the black dots went flying into the air. Before you could even react, the others dropped their guns and tried to flee, but were intercepted by your teammates. You witnessed some fierce hand-to-hand combat, with everyone involved using every weapon at their disposal.
Several aliens got thrown around and pinned to the ground, but soon enough, you and your team managed to hold the line and stop the attack. When it was all over, you breathed a sigh of relief and gazed around, assessing the damage. You were surprised that your squad managed to defeat so many enemies so easily. You guessed that these aliens were only the tip of the iceberg, and that it would be impossible to hold off such a large number of foes without help.
After collecting your thoughts, you radioed Renjun and the rest of your squad. "Alright guys, the fight is over. Everyone get some rest and reload your weapons. Let's keep a low profile until the coast is clear."
All of your orders were immediately obeyed, and your entire crew headed back inside to get some much needed rest. You checked your gun again, ensuring that it was fully loaded and that your grenade launcher was still operational. Despite the fact that your squad held the enemy off easily, you were certain that it was only a matter of time before they regrouped and tried to attack again. At least this time they won't have the element of surprise.
Hopefully.
“Finally back in Neo Station!” Mark called out as he walked off the ship. “I’m gonna take a long ass nap in the barracks until the next mission.”
After hours of killing aliens and avoiding being killed by alien weaponry, your squad was finally back on Neo Station. You were eager to check on the status of your ship, and see if any of the damages made on the ship could be repaired. It seemed like a good idea to have an experienced mechanic inspect the ship once the adrenaline wore off. Luckily, Haechan and Jaemin were able to examine your ship and give you a report on what repairs might be necessary.
Renjun groaned, stretching his limbs. “Same. I’m gonna try to get some sleep.”
“You’ve been cranky man.” Haechan laughed as he joined the two. “Sleep will do us good.”
“I’m heading to med bay to stock up on supplies.” Winwin muttered and turned to Doyoung. “Care to join me? The science wards are near there.”
“Sure.” Doyoung replied and headed in the same direction as Winwin.
“I’m gonna go hang out in the mess hall.” Taeyong ran off, leaving you with Jaehyun and Johnny. Jaemin seemed to have run off somewhere else.
“Weird guy.” Johnny commented as he watched the younger guy’s fading back.
“Leave the weird kids alone,” you playfully smacked Johnny’s arm. You looked at both him and Jaehyun. “What have you guys got planned?”
“Actually, we were hoping you might want to join us.” Jaehyun said with a smile.
“Really?” you questioned.
“Yeah.” Jaehyun smiled. “Let’s go have some fun, captain.”
"Lead the way."
You followed Jaehyun and Johnny towards a club that was filled with men and exotic female dancers of humans and alien species. There was a long bar at the front of the club that was decorated with dozens of drink bottles, and was surrounded by several seating areas, including couches and chairs. Some men sat alone in one of the booths, drinking themselves silly.
“A gentleman’s club?” You gave Jaehyun a look. “Really?”
“Of course it is! This is Neo Station after all. What did you expect?” Jaehyun teased.
“Some people prefer more subtle entertainment.”
Jaehyun rolled his eyes. “Subtle entertainment? Like the night you met someone new?”
You rolled your eyes. “I meant drinking in a lounge or at the bar. Not a gentleman’s club.”
“Where’s the fun in that?” Johnny asked. “This place is amazing!”
“If you say so.” You shrugged. “I should’ve gone with Taeyong to the mess hall…”
“Come on! I’ll buy you drinks all night!” Jaehyun insisted. “And girls! Lots and lots of girls!”
“You two can have the girls.” You looked around the club. “But I see some eye candy calling my name.”
Johnny looked in the same direction you were looking, a smirk on his face. “Ahhhh, so that’s your new friend? He’s handsome but not as handsome as me.”
Jaehyun raised an eyebrow before letting out a laugh. “We’re not going to see you in the next few days, are we?”
“Nope!” You nodded. “I’m gonna have fun tonight.”
Both Jaehyun and Johnny smirked at each other. “Have fun and use protection, captain.”
The two of them waved goodbye as you made your way through the crowd. When you finally found him, you noticed that he had already settled himself into a seat. The sight of you drew his attention, and he grinned widely when he saw you approach.
“Y/N,” Jungwoo greeted you as you sat beside him. He placed his hand on yours. “Weird place for you to show up at.”
You nodded over to your squad mates as they were watching a sexy alien woman dance seductively for the crowd. “My squadmates dragged me out here.”
“Not exactly your scene, is it?” Jungwoo asked as he slid a finger along the palm of your hand.
“As hot as the dancers are, they’re not my cup of tea.” You placed a hand on his knee. “You’re more my type.”
He smiled mischievously. “Had to come back for more, huh?”
You let out a laugh, slowly moving in closer to him. “It looks like it.”
He leaned in and gently kissed you. His lips were warm and inviting, which caused goosebumps to rise all over your body. You could feel yourself getting lost in the kiss, forgetting about everything else around you. He pulled away slightly and whispered in your ear. “Wanna get out of here?”
Your breath caught in your throat. “Oh god, yes.”
You led Jungwoo out of the club and into a nearby alleyway. It took several minutes to get there, and during that time, you continued kissing him fervently, enjoying every second of his embrace. When you reached the alleyway, you wrapped your arms around him tightly, causing him to chuckle.
“Don’t worry, no one’s coming.” He told you.
You paused for a moment. “Are you sure?”
“Absolutely.” He replied with a grin.
Before you knew it, Jungwoo pushed you against the wall and pressed his lips against yours. You could taste his minty breath as he started to explore your mouth, slipping his tongue inside of your mouth to stroke against yours. You felt him push his hands under your shirt, running them up and down your bare stomach.
“Fuck, Y/N.” He moaned softly as he continued exploring your mouth. “You’re so beautiful.”
You couldn’t help but shiver at his words. Jungwoo was definitely a very handsome man, but hearing those words from him was making you weak in the knees. He stopped kissing you momentarily and looked deep into your eyes. “Let's head back to my place so that I can take care of you."
His tone left no room for argument. You simply nodded and allowed him to guide you out of the alley. You enjoyed the walk to his suite, mostly because it gave you time to calm your racing heart and regain your composure. Once you arrived at his suite, Jungwoo grabbed your hand and led you inside.
"You have a nice suite." You looked around the living area. It wasn't as luxurious as some of the places you've seen on Earth, but it was decent enough for an officer.
"Thanks." He smiled as he moved forward to wrap his arms around you. "It's nothing compared to your suite though. Nothing but the best for one of the best captains I know."
"I never told you that I was a captain...”
“Of course you never told me…” He leaned in close and kissed you again. “Didn't need to. I just know how great of a person you are.”
You melted at his words. The sexual tension between you and Jungwoo was practically combustible, and it wasn't hard to tell that he was just as attracted to you.
“How great?” You asked softly as he pushed you against the wall.
“Beyond great.” He nipped at your lower lip, causing you to whimper.
“Then prove it.” You whispered as he slipped his hand under your bra.
Jungwoo's lips traveled down your neck as he slowly unclasped your bra. Your skin felt like fire as he gently caressed your nipples.
“Fuck.” Jungwoo whispered. “I love these tits of yours.”
He ran his hands down your breasts, squeezing them softly. You moaned softly, allowing him to continue playing with your breasts.
He lifted your top up, exposing your bare stomach. His eyes lit up at the sight of your toned abs. With quick movements, he slipped off your top, sending your lacy black bra flying across the room. Jungwoo gazed down at your naked chest. His fingers traced their way down to your stomach, where he traced your abdomen with his fingertips. His touch sent chills throughout your entire body.
He lifted you to the countertop and slowly lowered his lips to your belly button. His tongue flicked against your sensitive skin, causing you to moan even louder. Jungwoo didn't stop there. He continued trailing kisses down your stomach, his hands at the band of your pants. With light tugging motions, he managed to pull them off of you. They fell onto the floor with a thud, leaving you sitting in only your panties. Jungwoo stood up straight and gave you another admiring look.
“Like what you see?” You questioned playfully.
“God damn, you're fucking gorgeous.” He growled as he ripped off his own clothes before dropping to his knees in front of you.
With quick movements, he spread your legs open and positioned himself between them. He tugged on your panties, pulling them down until they were pooled at your ankles.
“Now taste me,” You ordered as you grabbed hold of his hair and guided his face to your pussy.
He quickly obliged. His tongue snaked its way into your dripping pussy, causing you to let out a loud moan. His tongue moved in circles, swirling around your clit and flicking lightly against it. He paid extra attention to your sensitive spot, pleasuring you to the fullest.
When he felt that you were ready to cum, he brought his face back up to your clit. Using his fingers, he circled it lightly while rubbing it against your clit. You began to thrash your head back and forth, unable to contain your orgasm any longer. You screamed loudly as you came, sending vibrations through Jungwoo's head. He buried his face into your pussy as you cried out in pleasure.
After a few moments, he pulled his head from your pussy and quickly wiped his face with a napkin. “Fuck, I need to be inside you right now.”
He positioned himself between your legs and pushed himself inside of you. You groaned as you adjusted to his size.
“You’re so tight.” He panted as he held himself up by bracing his hands on the countertop underneath you. “Fucking tight.”
He continued thrusting slowly inside of you. You closed your eyes and concentrated on feeling every inch of his dick move within you.
“Does it feel good?” He asked after a minute of continuous thrusting.
“Oh my god, yes!” You moaned. “Keep doing that. Fuck, don’t stop.”
Jungwoo let out a small laugh. “There will be plenty more if you keep begging like that.”
He slowly increased his pace, allowing you to enjoy every second of his large cock penetrating your tight pussy. Soon enough, he picked up the pace again, increasing his speed.
“Do you feel good, Jungwoo?” You asked, your voice barely above a whisper.
“Feelings mutual.” He gasped as he pounded harder and faster inside of you.
You bit your lip as he pounded his dick into you. It felt so good having his cock slide in and out of your pussy. His hips moved forcefully, driving his cock deeper inside of you. You bit your lip again, trying to fight off your impending orgasm.
“Cum for me, Y/N. Cum on my dick.” He grunted.
You obeyed his command without hesitation. “Fuck! Jungwoo!”
Your body shook violently as your orgasm swept through you. Your entire body tightened, causing you to scream out in ecstasy. Jungwoo moaned as he drove himself even deeper into you, continuing his powerful thrusts.
As you recovered from your orgasm, you opened your eyes and saw Jungwoo looking back at you with lust filled eyes. He began licking his lips as his gaze shifted from your eyes to your lips.
“Want to go again?” You whispered, knowing that you had more energy than before.
He smirked and nodded his head. “Why not?”
He lifted you from the countertop and carried you into the bedroom. Once he laid you down on the bed, he crawled on top of you.
“You’re looking at me funny. What? Did I do something wrong?” You asked innocently.
“Would your squad mates kill me if I said that I wanted to join you on your adventures?” He asked.
“What makes you think that?” You asked back, wrapping your arms around his neck.
“I really like you, Y/N and I want to keep seeing you. But it’s hard when we’re different missions and all that. That means no contact for weeks or months at a time.”
“So, what do you say? Will you let me tag along with you?” He wrapped his arms around you and pressed his lips against yours.
“I would really love that.” You returned the kiss and closed your eyes. “But I have one condition.”
“Name it.” He grinned.
“That you fuck me in every position you possibly can.”
He laughed. “Let’s crash land on the nearest inhabitable planet. I’m ready to make your dreams come true.”
#nct#nct 127#nct stories#nct fanfic#nct imagines#nct smut#nct jungwoo#jungwoo smut#kim jungwoo#jungwoo#jungwoo x reader#space exploration#outer space#space theme au#nct and space
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March Reading Recap
Juliet: The Life and Afterlives of Shakespeare's First Tragic Heroine by Sophie Duncan. I actually really liked this one! It was an interesting look at several different lenses that have been used over time to look at Juliet (specifically Juliet, not the play), including the relationship between fascism and Juliet in Verona, Italy and the development of West Side Story (didn't know Juliet was Jewish in an early version). I enjoy sort of niche/specific books focusing on a very particular subject, and this book scratched that itch well.
The Brilliant Abyss: Exploring the Majestic Hidden Life of the Deep Ocean, and the Looming Threat That Imperils It by Helen Scales. I read this book too soon after The Underworld by Susan Casey which, while not necessarily a better book, covered a lot of the same terrain. The trouble with a keen interest in a niche topic is, I suppose, that the books on it can start to get repetitive sometimes. It was still good, though, and this one focused a bit less on the history of human exploration than Casey did and a bit more on the ecosystems themselves, which I did welcome.
Blood of the Chosen and Emperor of Ruin by Django Wexler. The second and third books in the series that started with Ashes of the Sun - both continued the trend of "I don't know that I'd call these particularly good works of literature but they were very enjoyable and propulsive." The second book was stronger than the third - I ended up feeling like the conclusion of the trilogy was weaker and a little rushed, but I still enjoyed the experience as a whole and would offer at least a tentative, general recommendation of the series for those looking for a fantasy series that's not particularly innovative or serious but is an exciting ride.
The First Sister by Linden A. Lewis. This book reminded me a little bit of Such Desperate Glory but wasn't quite as well done, I don't think. The back compared it to Mass Effect but I don't really see that as a reasonable comparison. Possibly one of my favorite things about it was the cover design, which fucks. I still liked it, though, and I'm going to read the sequel.
The Great White Bard: How to Love Shakespeare While Talking About Race by Farah Karim-Cooper. Sometimes when I read things I feel like a snot because I go "this is interesting information but the writing feels a little amateurish" and that was my situation with this book. It was good analysis and interesting to read, though sometimes the "and this is how this is modern-ly relevant! q-anon mention" felt a little bit...ehhh, unnecessary, but the writing itself was...yeah. It felt amateurish. Which might just be a result of the book itself being targeted at a particular audience that's less academically-minded than I am, that's certainly possible, but it did affect my enjoyment of the book.
Last Days by Adam Nevill. Mostly this was good spooky fun, though it lost me with the "the ultimate bad guy is an overweight bisexual actor with AIDS" (it's a little more complicated than that, but not enough). Too bad, because conceptually and in terms of imagery it could've been very good. Between this and my last Nevill, I might have to give future books a pass. My search for horror that isn't playing on bigoted tropes apparently continues, since I'm on a bit of a streak there with this and Ring.
China: A History by John Keay. I'd call this one a solid overview despite the choice to use "bureaux" for the plural. However, I'm taking a lot of it with a grain of salt since as far as I can tell he didn't use many or possibly any Chinese secondary sources, and relied primarily for quotations/analysis on English secondary sources. I would've liked to see more of a balance. Still, as far as background information and a general broad history goes, it feels like it was worth reading for me to get a little more background/grounding in history I don't have a lot of familiarity with. (Also, holy shit did Ken Liu crib hard on Liu Bang and Xiang Yu for The Grace of Kings and now I know that.)
Remnants of Filth: vol. 3 by Rou Bao Bu Chi Rou. I continue to really enjoy this book and this volume might be my favorite yet - the flashbacks were satisfying to fill in some of the gaps in mysteries as yet unrevealed, and having Gu Mang fully "back" (more or less) is a fun development that is already having consequences changing the dynamic between him and Mo Xi in delightfully angsty ways. Of the cnovels I'm currently in the middle of this one is close to LHJC as far as my favorite.
Starter Villain by John Scalzi. This one is what I think people would call a "romp" which is all well and good and I probably should've known what I was getting into, but I think I am just not much of a "romp" reader. It was fun, I guess? But I don't know that I felt like it was good, and I'm probably not going to go around recommending it. My first Scalzi, and I don't know if that's typical of him, but I probably won't be in a hurry to pick up another one anytime soon.
Invisible Planets: Contemporary Chinese Science Fiction in Translation ed./trans. by Ken Liu. Short story collections are really hit and miss for me, but this was actually a collection that was pretty hit all the way through! Very interesting stories, a couple I'm still thinking about. I'm looking forward to reading my other collection of short stories in translation, which includes some fantasy - some of these actually felt somewhere between fantasy and science fiction in a very interesting way that I liked.
--
phew. I read a lot last month! Currently I'm reading Medea by Eilish Quin (we'll see how that goes); I have on my docket The Mountain in the Sea by Ray Nayler (recommended to me) and I think I might reread She Who Became the Sun so I can read He Who Drowned the World. I've been on more of a fiction than a nonfiction kick of late, but I am eyeing Islands of Abandonment by Cal Flyn and might make that part of my rotation. we shall see!
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I really don’t want swtor to shut down it’s the only eu thing that’s active we have left
I knew these asks were going to start coming in.
So for those who haven't heard, it was reported, and then later confirmed by Keith Kanneg on the forums, that EA is "selling" SWTOR to another developer, Broadsword. For those who want to read the article discussing it, you can read here: https://www.ign.com/articles/star-wars-the-old-republic-development-third-party-bioware
TL;DR -- It's not shutting down. The servers are going to stay active for a while
There's a few points to note here:
If I understand things correctly, EA actually owns Broadsword. So EA is in fact not actually offloading a property, I think what's actually happening is BioWare Austin itself is being divvied out and would not be surprised to see if that branch is shut down
At least half of the SWTOR dev team is part of this move, so the key things to keep an eye on is which members of the dev team are moving. If the narrative staff is kept intact, then we have more story ahead of us beyond what's been written, and they've confirmed we're getting 7.3, 7.3.1, and 7.4. It's important to note that their production timeline is generally a year out from things being written, so story-wise, if they have narrative staff, we'll likely still have some story drops ahead of us
SWTOR is profitable (it hit over $1 billion in profit several years ago), and I will admit I don't have the best understanding of video game finances, but my impresion it was far into the black and maybe not an enromous cash cow, but a decent consistent revenue stream. EA is a publisher that is about profits, so as long as the game is profitable, even if there's not new story drops, the game will stay online
Disney has seemingly taken a recent interest in SWTOR after mostly ignoring it after its acquisition of Star Wars, even going so far as to finally acknowledge the general KOTOR/SWTOR era in their presentations last year at Celebration. Does this ultimately mean anything? I don't know, but SWTOR is one of the longest running current properties with a stable player base. They're just as interested in profit as EA. Probably another indicator that the game will keep running for a while.
Other properties that Broadsword operates, such as Dark Age of Camelot and Ultima Online, are old games. Ultima Online was released in 1997, and the servers are still active. So like, I think regardless of what happens in regards of the story, we're not losing the ability to log in and play the game
Long term subscriptions - I remember reading, and forgive me, because I've long forgotten the source, that a key indicator if the servers are going offline is to also keep an eye on the six-month subscription option. Basically, if suddenly the only option for subs goes down to one month, that's when to worry about being able to actually play the game.
This is probably not about SWTOR, but BioWare as a whole. It seems there's a leadership issue at the main Alberta office that's causing issues. This is likely an Anthem issue all over again, but Anthem this time happens to be the Mass Effect and Dragon Age properties. Unfortunately, BioWare Austin looks like it's going to suffer the consequences of that, even though they've been running a tight ship overall compared to the rest of the branches. I feel for them. This sucks.
Now I'm not an oracle, I have no idea if this is ultimately a good or bad thing for the game itself. There's a lot of evidence for both sides of the coin, so right now the best thing is to wait and see. We at least have the promise of the next two patches. Let's focus on enjoying that, and celebrating what we love about our silly space game.
If you love the game, keep playing it. Spend money on it, and keep it profitable and it will stay around. Be kind and supportive of the devs, who regardless of how this shakes out, are going through a major transition. But immediately decrying an active game's death and going into doom and gloom is not going to help things.
Will we get more story beyond 7.4? I do not know one way or the other. I hope we do, but it's hard to say for certain on that front. But I do believe we'll still have our toons and be able to replay all of the released content for quite a while to come. Again, for now I'm just going to enjoy my favorite game, and support it as long as I have it. Even if this inevitably means it's going to change.
#i will say#they made a significant investment in regards to the upcoming date night stuff#as its all fully voiced#which involves a LOT of voice actors#so i just don't know guys#i'm just going to focus on loving my game#in all its quirks and quibbles#but will probably be muting or unfollowing anyone being overtly negative about this news#as i just don't have it in me to see a constant stream of negativity about my happy place right now#you do you#we all cope in our own ways#i'm trying to remain cautiously hopeful#forgive me i got about four hours of sleep last night#because insomnia has to insomnia#so i hope this came across well
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Re: Mass nonbasic hate in standard and pioneer pretty please with a cherry on top
I have read the threads from my previous questions, and I now understand why most of the extreme nonbasic hate cards, stuff like blood moon, back to basics, or ruination, can feel oppressive against decks with 2 or even 1 color, which is obviously not the goal of such cards.
I do want to ask now, as question of curiosity more than a specific request: what kinds of things make hate cards go too far? Whether it be blood moon or rest in peace or engineered plague; at what point does a hate piece cause too much collateral damage (like blood moon), or at what point is the punishment so severe that it can fully lock some decks out of the game (like Rest in Peace). Where is the sweet spot, how do you know you’ve found it, and what kinds of knobs do you turn to help get there? I know that’s way more than one question and might be better suited as an article, but I’d still be fascinated to hear about it.
It's just yet another reason why play balance is so difficult. Not enough and it's not effective. Too much and it has impacts you don't want. Mostly it's a lot of trial and error in playtesting, and then some finger crossing.
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Honestly, I think this past week with Elon Musk just kinda goes to show how much better Tumblr's longer, slower game is.
Like, take revenue sources. Hosting is expensive and those bills do need to get paid to have a functional website. So how do you go about earning money as a website in an ethical manner without locking out users that can't pay?
It's true that tumblr struggles a lot with advertisers, it has for a long time. Ads are the number one way that most websites earn money from their users, so that's a big problem.
So what did tumblr do? Tumblr made a really smart pivot when it realized that it's userbase wasn't a good market for ads. It looked to establish a more direct payment model and look to it's users as consumers rather than products.
The ad-free for 5$ a month is honestly a sound model. Sure, you can always use ad-block, but you can also chose to offer payment to the site directly if you have the ability to do so. Allowing users to blaze posts is also a really good choice because it removes the part of advertisements that is the real problem (the ad targeting and privacy invasion). Allowing users to operate patron like blogs or tip bloggers is also a great secondary revenue source that works well for both the site and the bloggers.
Tumblr "gifts" are one of the best ideas they've had. 3$ to send your friend some crabs for 24 hours? Hell yeah. It's tiny little bonuses that you absolutely don't need, but you can use to provide a little bit of joy to someone else for a small price. By and large, these features are all reasonably priced, and allow tumblr to get revenue without locking their users out of important features or selling user data. This is honestly one of the ways that I can see the internet moving forward in a much healthier direction.
Compare the reaction to tumblr's "ad-free for 5$" model to the reaction to Elon Musk's "checkmark for 8$" model. While your mileage may vary, my experience with the ad-free offer was a generally positive reaction from the userbase. Some people were neutral or dismissive, but there certainly wasn't outrage.
Meanwhile, Elon's dumbass idea has drawn massive outrage, and had to be delayed because it was a legitimate threat to US elections. Because Elon isn't selling an ad free optional experience, he's selling the ability to participate on the platform, impersonate other people, and effectively cutting off a huge amount of the userbase. That's a big part of why there's been so much outrage and such a mass exodus.
Since Automattic took over, they've been slowly working to make genuinely good changes that both maintain what makes tumblr work, while improving existing issues with the site and opening up better options in the future. While I certainly have criticism of them, it's a hell of a better path to go down then whatever the hell's been going on at Twitter and Facebook's dumb choices.
We'll see how all of this plays out, but I've got a feeling that tumblr's dedication to maintaining functionality & working on repairing it's relationship to it's userbase will play out better in the long term. Who knows though.
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Things in my ask box
Hi folks. Every so often I get questions from folks that are good, but which I worry might catch them some flak from my other readers or whoever. Sometimes I answer those people privately, but in general I prefer not to do private replies to asks; for one thing, other people might want to know the answer, and for another, I've had a few awkward situations result from doing so (basically just people going parasocial on me), and I think that sort of thing is less likely when it's clear I'm talking to everyone. So, I'm going to handle these awkward asks by just treating them as Q&A questions -- without showing that person's username and where necessary, altering the question in order to protect their identity. I've got a few of these stored up, but just gonna do two this time for length and time reasons. I'll get to the rest later.
Are you a proshipper?
Yep. Feel free to alter your decision re following me on social media now that you've read that answer. But I believe in "don't like, don't read," and that fiction doesn't indicate what an author really believes (because it's fiction), and that there's no subject matter too immoral to explore on its face (everything depends on the execution), so... yep.
2. I love the Broken Earth trilogy, but I have to say, the middle book really didn't go anywhere, literally. Essun stayed in Castrima and Nassun moved around a little more but mostly stayed in the same place too. It killed a lot of the story momentum for me. Why did you decide to do this?
[spoilers for Broken Earth books, though I'll try to minimize them and will put a "read more" before I get there]
Because I felt like it. I'm not saying that defensively, I'm just noting that the answer to pretty much any question you might ask a writer about why they do a particular thing is... because they felt like it. Period full stop. Sorry that wasn't what you wanted to read! It was, however, the story I wanted to tell.
To elaborate... different people have different expectations of trilogies. That's because there are a lot of different ways to handle them, narratively speaking. Sometimes a trilogy is really a group of shared-universe stories taking place in the same world but not necessarily featuring the same characters, and with unrelated plots. Some are telling a single story, but through different POVs and smaller plot arcs that each have their own terminuses; that's what I did with the Inheritance Trilogy, for example. And sometimes, as I did with the Broken Earth books, the author is just telling one big story broken up into three parts. (There are more ways to do a trilogy than this, but let's keep this brief, lol.)
Now, there are a lot of ways to handle this kind of story, but a pattern that most of us are used to is:
Book One: Introduction to the world and important characters and the apparent stakes;
Book Two: Deep dive into the important characters and world, thus giving the audience a reason to care more; and
Book Three: Now we really know the stakes and shit just got real! Now we care what happens to the characters when EVERYTHING! BLOWS!! UP!!!
(I am feeling very silly today, sorry.)
We're familiar with this pattern because we see it all the time, especially in American media. It's a variation on the three-act structure seen in plays and other narratives. It's the basis of our most popular longform stories! The original Star Wars trilogy did it. The Mass Effect trilogy did it. (Andromeda was a separate story, probably meant to be the start of a new trilogy.) The Lord of the Rings did it, prequeled by the Hobbit and mirrored by the Silmarillion. I mentioned those examples because the middle stories of each all exhibit the same traits: a drastic change of pace or location for the protagonists, putting the protagonists through personal character growth arcs, and poking at minutia or seemingly unimportant aspects of the world (which usually end up pretty important before all is said and done).
Now let's answer your question. Spoiler warning again:
In the Broken Earth, we got introduced to the Stillness and Essun in Book One. There was a lot of physical movement in that book as Essun was on the road for most of it (as were other characters), but the plot itself was relatively simple: A bad thing happened to this person and she needs to go somewhere and find someone, to fix it! And then pretty much the entirety of that book's narrative was "Who is this person, why does the bad thing matter, and how close does she get to finding her missing person?" Then in Book Two, we learned a little more about this person, a lot more about her impact on other characters including the one she's been trying to find, and we spent a while learning about orogeny, the Obelisk Gate, and what the stone eaters have been up to. I cheated a little on this; there wasn't room to do a deep dive into the backstory of one pivotal character, but I did finally reveal that this character is the "secret" narrator of the whole trilogy, and made his agenda clearer. I ended up putting his "deep dive" into Book Three instead, where it was particularly relevant to the STUFF! BLOWING!! UP!!!
The reason a lot of readers complain about "Middle Book Syndrome," I suspect, is because of this pattern -- and because of their expectations. A lot of people come at a middle book expecting Book One Redux. That's what you often get in shared-universe trilogies -- Book One over and over again, roughly the same balance of characters vs events each time, in a familiar setting. We're conditioned to want that, I think, from other episodic works. Comic books, for example: When I was working on FAR SECTOR, my editor at the time explained that I needed to try and have a fight or action scene in most of the issues. I hate fight scenes -- sorry! -- so that was hard for me. TV shows -- the ones that aren't themselves telling a single big story over time -- do this, too. I think of it as the "If You Liked X, Then Try... X!" structure. Absolutely nothing wrong with this structure, by the way. I'm just describing it, not throwing shade. I'm a big fan of stories like this myself.
But even for audience members who were expecting the Three-Act Trilogy structure instead, that middle book is going to be jarring. It's supposed to be jarring. The refugees have survived the first book but stopped to dress their wounds and regroup; the adventurers on a quest have reached an impasse and need to find allies and grind to build up their strength; the stalwart hero has just suffered a massive setback and needs to overcome their own doubt or character flaws. A good way to handle this is to take the characters out of their familiar space, and put them somewhere new, or give them a very different kind of challenge. [Mass Effect and LOTR spoilers] Oh, no, Shepard died and their team broke up! What now? Oh, no, Frodo and Sam are on their own trying to get to Mordor! They're just these little guys! How are they gonna make it? If you got overly attached to Shepard team from ME1, or the Fellowship, you're in for a rough ride in these followups. But the jarring nature of this kind of followup is absolutely necessary. An author who does this knows they're going to lose some readers, when they do it. Clearly I almost lost you! But I stand by that choice, because I think it made the whole trilogy better.
Sidebar: I'm old enough to remember the controversy back when "The Empire Strikes Back" came out. Critics haaaaaated that movie! It was too dark, they said; wasted too much time on unimportant stuff. Too much character work, not enough space battles. Then it became clear that audiences loved the second movie even more than the first, precisely because it was darker and because Luke spent so much time futzing around with Yoda and because there were all these girl cooties romantic moments between Leia and Han. A lot of the critics backpedaled at that point, with some of them even acknowledged that they'd been hoping for Star Wars All Over Again and not What Happens Next That Is Not Star Wars. They'd simply brought the wrong expectations to the story.
This is not to say that you have the wrong expectations, Ask-er. Maybe you were expecting exactly that structure, and you just don't like the way I handled it, or you think I did a poor job. Every reader's experience of a story is different, and not everybody's gonna want to pick up everything I throw down. But you asked why did everyone stay in one place, and this is why: to do a deep dive into the character of the Stillness itself. In a story where the setting was as much a "character" as the people in it, I felt it necessary to show enough of that setting for readers to care about it. Would you care, for example, if the town of Brevard (Damaya and Schaffa spend one night there in Book One) got blown off the map in Book Three? Probably not, because I spent no time on any of its citizens or issues. A lot of people cared about Castrima, though, by the end of Book Two.
Whoo, this got long! Hope it answers your question, Ask-er.
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ROUND 2 MATCH 47
Polly propaganda:
"Polly comes across as a party girl. She's wild, she likes sex, she likes drugs, she likes drinks. She is besties with Scott and Vera. She loves pulling pranks. She's fun all around. But as you get to know her throughout her endings across the three games, you discover a deep sadness within her. She's a chess master. She loves Russian literature. She's actually kind of a genius. She had a hard life but she won't let that stop her afterlife. Her secret ending in the first game about how she actually died (which she lies about all the time) absolutely broke my heart. She's just so nuanced and layered. She brings out the best in the player characters because she wants them to understand that you can have fun and goof off and it not be the end of the world. She has lots of backstory and she's major plots in both the first game (Prom) and the third (Roadtrip). I highly recommend playing the games because experiencing her secret endings in both is just absolutely heart wrenching."
Jaal propaganda:
“His romance is all about trust gained, vulnerability and making each other feeling safe and he's SO sweet throughout. Player character (Ryder) arrives unannounced on the planet where Jaal's species live, and he joins them to assess their intentions. He's slow to trust (last aliens that they made contact with literally started a decades-long war against his people) but after a while he can start to open up (he responds well to Ryder trusting him and not intervening in certain scenarios, choosing to help his people rather than just finish a mission, honesty in general). He's curious about everything, eager to share knowledge on language, food, biology, culture, literally anything that comes to his mind. He likes tinkering and understanding how things work, he writes poetry and he sews. If romanced, he invites Ryder to his home to meet his mother(s) and the rest of the family, tells them "You make my heart sing" and asks them if they want to be together. Eventually he will take Ryder on a date to his favorite place on the planet to confess his love (player can agree to an intimate scene but it progresses the same even if they say no to him). After they officially get together he'll start using pet names like "Darling one" or "dearest" or "amazing heart" or "You are the light that we all follow, that I follow". Plus, after Ryder meets her, his mother starts doting on you and sending you emails to ask questions to make them feel 100% welcomed in the family (especially since Ryder is human and they face public scrutiny for being of two different planets/species). He's constantly smitten for the player character and not afraid to make it clear for everyone in the general vicinity.”
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what video games would you recommend for someone who literally has never played any but has always wanted to get into them, with a good story line lol
HMMM ok… ok. ok. these are mostly RPGs because i think people tend to recommend “cozy” games to beginners but for me its all about story.
Red Dead Redemption 2: aim assist mechanic, no constant danger, good story, dress up element, character arcs that make sense and make you feel so much
Dragon Age Inquisition: good story, character and background customization, do a lot or do a little (lots of side quests but not necessary), good npcs, romance (i love all the dragon age games but this one is most beginner friendly)
Mass Effect: a queer leader in rpgs! interesting sci fi story, simple mechanics that span across all the games, do a lot or do a little, character customization, good npcs, choices matter
Night in the Woods: almost a visual novel, story and character driven, beautiful art,
Fire Emblem (3 houses or awakening): nintendo only sorry, simple game mechanic (basically checkers/chess), great npcs, lots of player choice, romance, choices matter, cool world
My Time at Sandrock: the only cozy game i’d put on this list, goofy, good story, do a little do a lot
Sleeping Dogs: simple controls, huge variety of quests and gameplay (racing, combat, stealth, fetch, chaperoning, etc) not overly long, well researched (its a great time capsule for 2008 hong kong!) slightly dated atp
if you have a suggestion go ahead! i picked all of these as games that i know you wont struggle with. my biggest advice is DONT PANIC. when you are learning a game and its controls, you will did! learn to save often and dont fret if u fuck up. also if ur stressed look at a walkthru
enjoy anon!!
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🟨 WIP Whenever ⏲
I got tagged by a couple of people... more than A MONTH ago ghfh so I won't tag them but thank you!! 🥺 finally have some stuff to show uwu
Been taking a wee break from modding for some days, started playing Overland and it's SUCH a cool lil game 🤏
It was also the occasion for me to properly boot up my 3D printer, tested the installation with a lil horsy I shared already (more importantly to check if it was on a straight enough surface and to adjust its bed temperature to my room)
I've been following h3LLcreator on Instagram for years and waited for a good opportunity to get some of their models 👀 They have a lot of cool stuff, planning on getting some mass effect babes later
But first 🔥🐎
SHE CAME OUT SO GOOOD 😩👌 Made a honky with the rotation during the preparation so I'll have to tweak it cause I'm planning on printing another one >:3c for someone >:3c
Didn't cleaned the stand yet but needed to test if everything was fitting correctly~ aaaaah OwO
I thankfully dodged a burnout right at the edge so I was able to bounce back into modding pretty quick (my honks don't usually last long, just need to take a breather every now and then)
So I been cooookiiiiing
Can expect this pair of Kinda Fucked Up Pants next week :3c
As well as these pair of platform boooooots (there's more colors for both the pants and boots but I'm keeping a bit of surprise there cmon)
Feeling inspired so might pop out more shtuff in the meantime who knows 👁👄👁
▶ Gonna tag a few peeps, haven't been keeping up with what everyone's doing - as always, no pressure at all to do anything about it! 💛
@itzsassha - @theviridianbunny - @therealnightcity - @aldecaldhos - @kdval - @afterdark-vp - @dreamskug - @sammysilverdyne - @wraithsoutlaws - @arcandoria - @lokiina
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I can't stop thinking about the narrative use of guns and violence in Disco Elysium, and how the lack of violence as a gameplay mechanic leads to a emotionally richer story and more fully realized world.
You go through a lot to get your gun back - on my playthrough it was the last thing I did before I confronted Ruby - and then there's only one point in the game where you can actually fire it. In my playthrough, the Necktie Molotov Cocktail missed and Harry never had the opportunity to fire his own gun at all - the only time it was used in the whole game was by Kim.
Other uses of guns include:
When you learn that Roy bought Harry's gun only because Harry was going around threatening to shoot himself with it.
Trying to shoot the body down; Kim doesn't make the shot, and when Harry tries, you fear he might shoot a passerby by accident (I was terrified he would accidentally shoot Kim or Cuno).
The discovery of the weapons cache, and bitter knowledge that with more caches all over Revachol, there's no way any can prevent widespread violence.
The Pigs threatening Harry and Kim with Harry's gun: it's tense, and terrifying, and incredibly sad, as your fear for your own wellbeing slowly shifts into a fear for hers.
Ruby threatening to kill herself; in my playthrough, I failed to talk her out of it, and I think it was the most horrifying moment of the game.
The Deserter spent decades spying on the world through his rifle scope, fantasizing about killing people from afar. When he actually pulled the trigger, it kicked off the series of events that led to open violence on the streets of Martinaise (and might still lead to more.)
Every time guns are used, either onscreen or off (and there are very, very few instances of gun use onscreen), it's shocking and brutal. Bringing a gun into any situation ratchets up the tension and scares everyone, including Kim and Harry, who have decades of experience as cops and have both killed people.
This isn't a game where violence is normalized. It especially isn't a game where deadly violence is normalized. It's such a contrast from games where combat is a part of gameplay, and the use of violence is ordered and expected and strategic. It's such a contrast from the game ZA/UM originally planned to make:
(images from the Disco Elysium Artbook)
And that's so interesting to me because it's incredibly effective, and it feels more real this way, but it's absolutely not what I would have expected from this genre of story in a setting like Martinaise. You're playing as a cop in a poor, war-scarred neighborhood where the biggest power is basically a mob boss. If I didn't know anything about DE and someone described it to me I would have expected something more like, well, Torson & McLaine: shoot-outs in the streets, life is cheap, you know. Combat is still the primary gameplay mechanic of many (most?) games out there, and by necessity that turns most of the people in any combat-based game into mindless mooks who are there to be slaughtered en masse.
But Disco Elysium doesn't do that. In DE, every single interactable character is a fully realized person. Most of them have surprisingly deep conversational trees, and those conversations change as you proceed through the game and have new experiences and learn new things. Even characters you can't talk to much feel like real people; you're just seeing the tip of the iceberg. No one is disposable cannon-fodder. And it makes the world feel so much more real than any other CRPG I've ever played, and when anyone actually gets killed or seriously wounded, it's a shock; it's awful. You grow to know and love this little district and the people in it. The looming spectre of violence in the streets of Martinaise as you race against the mercenaries to solve the case feels like a real threat.
It's just. Really good, y'know?
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