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soxcietyy · 21 days

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Temptation

Chapter 6

Your dad is tired of you bringing home these unworthy men. None of them being fit to take care of you or to be given the family business since you are the only daughter. He decides to find you someone fit to be your husband and receive help from the father of the church. That’s when you meet Yuta, though just because he goes to church doesn’t mean he’s much of a saint

Mafia, murder, violence, mentions of religion, (will contain other things in the next chapters)

"W-wait! Wow don’t you think it’s too soon to have a kid?! I mean common we’re still young!" You say panicked.

Yuta looked at you from above as he took your white heels off. "Jesus can decided that, I’m just trying to fulfill my duties as your husband tonight." Yuta said as he continued to undress you.

You internally groan knowing that you couldn’t argue against anything he had just said. Unzipping your dress he started taking your dress off bit by bit. Making sure to handle your body with such delicacy. It was as if he was handling an expensive porcelain doll. Scared to handle you roughly because you could potentially crack. You watched as his eyes scanned each part of your body as he uncovered it. Those dark blue eyes making you feel insecure about how you looked. Yea he might of seen you naked once but this was different. Did he like what he was seeing? Or was he looking for imperfections?

Pulling the top of your dress down you immediately cover your chest. You were absolutely embarrassed to show him everything you had. This felt way too scandalous and out of your comfort zone. He didn’t care though, he knew what he wanted to do. Grabbing your hands he puts them on your sides and looks at your breast. His breath hitches as he analyzed how beautiful they looked. Getting closer he places a kiss on your cheek.

"I can’t decide if I want to handle you with care, or make you cry." He whispers as he runs his right hand knuckles onto your cheek.

"Whatever you want, just please be considerate." You say hoping he wouldn’t be too aggressive.

He gives you a smile before yanking the dress right off of you.

He had smiled… but why didn’t it seem like one of affection. It looked like he was happy to finally have his way with you.

Grabbing you by the neck he presses you down onto the mattress. Your eyes widen as you could feel his hand grip onto your neck even tighter. "You have no idea how long I’ve been waiting to fuck the innocents out of you. To taint and ruin you.." He whispers into your ear before licking it.

He didn’t let go of his grip because he couldn’t let you escape. No matter how much you begged and cry he was not planning on letting you ruin this night. Taking his shirt off and unbuckling his belt with one hand he watches you squirm.

He goes and grabs both of your legs putting them both over on of his shoulders. Finally letting go of your neck. Your legs are made to move up until they were feet from your face, as he hover over you. Your heat being exposed in the air. He ran his hand up and down your thigh as he looked down at you to see your pathetic reactions to being touched. The way your legs would jump every time he ran his fingers over your exposed parts. He watched how you shut your eyes from embarrassment.

You felt as he spanked your heat making jolt from the sudden pain. "Yu!" You say trying to grab his hand.

"I’m not in the mood to hear you cry anymore. You’ve cried enough already." He was able to slide one finger in you smoothly. You could feel how his long thick finger slid in and out of you. This was something totally new to you. You didn’t hate it but it felt very odd.

He then proceeded to skip a step and shove two more fingers. You let out a cry of pain as he stretched you out. It was hurting, hurting extremely bad. You tell him to be more gental but he ignored you. Insted he went in knuckles deep, spreading his fingers inside of you.

You kick his shoulders to make him stop but he doesn’t. He tells you to stop squirming around because this was for your own good. You couldn’t understand how this was supposed to help you. Gripping into his arm you beg him to stop.

He didn’t bother looking at you but instead he focused on what he was doing. Tears form around your eyes as you dragged out his name. Hoping he would bother to listen to your please. He was being so aggressive and unemotional in this whole process.

"Yuta please, it hurts so bad, I’m scared." You say trying to escape his grasp. Still he had a tight grip on you making your tempts unsuccessful.

"Stop, Im actually being considerate here but I think I’ll forget about that. This is going to to benefit you so be quiet an-"

A loud knock is heard at the door. You look up in Horror because you two should be the only ones here. You watch as he takes an annoyed pause and turns his attention to the door.

"This better be important." Yuta says out loud.

"Don, there an emergency that needs to be handled right now." A deep grasp voice says from the other side.

You look at Yuta shocked to know someone was here the whole time… they were listening to everything the entire time…

Yuta lets a loud sigh as he slips his fingers out and drops your legs. Quickly he grabs his shirt and walk infront of a mirror. Straightening himself up he walk towards you and pulls a cover over you.

"Stay, I don’t want you coming down looking for me unless you’re dying. Got it?" Yuta looks at you with his intense eyes. You give him a small nod before he turned around and left.

Then you were left in the white dimm room with your own thoughts. You were saved by whoever interrupted. You were thankful for that stranger because you didn’t think you could have lasted any longer. Was this how losing your virginity felt like? You couldn’t quite possibly comprehend how woman’s lived for this type of engagement. It felt as he was ripping your insides apart. He was treating such a delicate part with such brutal force. You couldn’t even imagine how real sex actually felt like.

Getting comfortable under the blanket you slowly close your eyes. You felt exhausted from everything that has happened. Taking a small nap couldn’t possibly hurt anyone. Slowly you drifted to into a cozy slumber.

__________

Yuta sits in his office while seven men surround his desk with tight jaws and their lips being pressed together. He had just been told the urgent news and he’s not quite sure how to feel about it. He just couldn’t understand how something like that happened near his presence. How it went unknown for hour until now…

"What do you mean he’s dead?" Yuta asks as he rests his chin on his right arm.

All of his men looked at each other not wanting to say anything. They knew Yuta may launch something towards them if they said something he didn’t like. He had anger issues, Had. He’s gotten much better if he say’s so himself.

"He’s sleeping with the fishes Don, literally in the lake that was behind the wedding venue." One of them finally spoke up.

"Maybe he got too drunk and fell in the water." Yuta said trying to deny the fact that one of his men died on his watch. He wasn’t just any man, he was the only good fighter, Itadori was one of his youngest men.

Yuta watched as they looked at each other worriedly. That’s when another dropped a photograph onto the desk. Picking it up he could see something that clearly was no accident. The boy laid on the grass, soaked in water and in his nice suit. Then there was the gorged out eyes, a knife sticking out his chest and a heart carved on his shoulder.

Heart’s..

This was absolutely getting out of hand. Not only did this man kill his own wife but now he was targeting Yuta’s men? He must absolutely hate Gojos guts if he was doing all of this. There was nothing much to this drama. It was simple, the Gojo franchise was just doing better than the Heart’s. Hearts was the first to kill an accountant from Gojos company. Gojo hit back and killed there vice president.

At first Yuta didn’t understand why they being extra and taking the lives away. Until he was out in the business as the investor. These type of company’s don’t run by simply following the rules and playing nice. They all where doing illegal thing because apparently the income they were already earning wasn’t enough. If you didn’t get into the dirty work then you would never look like these billion dollar franchises.

Gojo owned a luxury brand and he expanded it all of the country. He only had 100 locations in America and yet wanted more. He wanted to go abroad, see his name in different country’s. He didn’t quite have the means for it so that why he decided to start doing dirty business.

Hearts? He owned a fast food franchise. May not sound very bougie but it did make him bags. Yuta wasn’t quite sure why he got into underground work but everyone seemed to have a part in it.

"Put him to rest, I’ll see what our next moves are. Actually before you go I wanted to talk about how things will run now since I have a wife." Yuta said as he grabbed the photograph and shoved it in his drawer.

"She’s doesn’t know anything about this business and I would like it to stay that way. If she try’s to but in then just come up with a lie." Yuta leans back in his chair as he stares at his wedding band. "She’s my wife, don’t disrespect her because then she’ll come crying to me and you’ll be dealing with me."

Before Yuta could get another thought out he heard a commotion outside. There was no way Hearts managed to do something else. He stood abruptly and grabbed his gun. So much has been going on recently that he wasn’t going to be caught off guard without a weapon. Walking through his men he grabbed the door and swung it open. His eyes darted around looking for the suspect. Then he saw you on the floor, he didn’t know whether to be thankful that it was you or not.

He made his was to you after closing the doors behind him. You looked quite frantic as you sat on the floor with one of his shirt buttoned half way up. You were clinging to one of the guards begging him to let her into the office. Clearly you haven’t noticed his presence yet.

"What’s going on? Didn’t I tell you to stay put?"" Yuta grabbed you from the shoulders and pulled off the poor guy who looked traumatized. Once you look up at him you throw yourself of his arms.

"Hospital, I need to go to the hospital!" You yell at him.

You were shaking of fear in his arm. Looking like a frightened rabbit that had been caught. Quickly he set you down and started looking for wounds. Your legs seemed fine, arms were looking great, and there was no sigh of blood anywhere on the shirt you were currently wearing. Maybe you woke up from a nightmare, that’s right you could of had a stupid dream.

"Right, let’s go back to bed no? You had a long day today." Yuta said as he grabbed your arm.

You pull him back as he tries to walk. "No! You’re not listening! I need to go to the hospital right now Yuta, I could be dying!" You yell as you rip your arm from his grasp. He didn’t bother listening to what he assumed was your psychotic episode. He grabbed you by the ankle and started to pull you closer to him. Once he had you close enough he wrapped his arms around your body. He had to put you somewhere before anyone could see. What would they say if they saw this?

As he tried heading to the stairs you became more frantic. Kicking your legs and attempting to move your arms. All Yuta could think about was counting down because if he didn’t only god knows what he would do to you. You were really testing him right now though and he couldn’t help but having some thoughts run through his mind.

For a moment he thought you had given up because you stop moving. He should have known better though because not too long after your head leaned foward for a moment and then you threw it back with so much force.

BAM

Your head made contact with his face making him drop you. Your scurry on the floor in such a quick pace as you felt him let go of you. Grabbing his nose he rubs it before looking back at his hand to see blood.

That when all he could see was red, and no it wasn’t because of the blood.

He stalked towards you immediately and grabbed you by the neck before slamming you onto door. You gasp as you hit your head hard against the wooden door. Your head pounded in pain as you were turned to look at him.

"I fucking dare you to pull that shit again. I will tie you to the bed and make sure you never see the sun again." Yuta said furiously.

More tears fell from your face uncontrollably. "But I’m bleeding." You sob.

Yuta let out a tired sigh, "Where are you injured from? I don’t see anything." He bites his lip as a way to control himself from going off on you again. Your eyes were so red and puffy from crying so much that he decided to let you go.

You drop onto the floor on your knees as you wipe your face with the white sleeves.

"I’m bleeding." You saw in between cry’s.

"Where?" Yuta asks searching you with his eyes again. Could it be possible he missed it?

"Down there, I saw blood when I woke up and it was coming from down there." You say looking at him with those watery eyes.

Yuta squats down and reaches for you to pull you closer but you flinch and move away. He let out an exhausted chuckle as he runs his hand through his hair. He fucked up so soon, not even a day married and you were already scared of him. He didn’t know what he was going to do with you nor himself. Yuta looks at the guard and motions his head towards the office, signaling him to go on in. He immediately followed with a worried expression. How does someone like him fix this situation?

"You’re fine, trust me. I must of broke your hymen, it’s normal for that to happed when you first lose your virginity." Yuta says as he sits on the floor with you.

He felt like total shit when he realized you weren’t making anything up. You were scared of what was happening to your body and now you were scared of him.

"But we didn’t even do it." You look at him concerned. Yuta looks at his hands before looking at you. He didn’t know whether to tell you that he essentially tore your vagina. Then again you would be persistent about going to see a doctor if he told you that.

"It’s complicated…is there something you want? A dress you’ve had your eyes on? Purse? Jewelry? It can be anything." Yuta sucked at apology’s, actually he’s never apologized to anyone period. This was his best attempt on making things right. He couldn’t really find the words to make an actual apology.

Sorry for slamming you against a door? Yea no…

"No, I have everything I could as for." You say.

Well what else can he do now?

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seresinhangmanjake · 2 years

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Signed Away

Jake “Hangman” Seresin x Reader Series

Summary: You find out about the contractual marriage your parents arranged with Jake’s when you were a baby. You’re plently angered by it, but Jake doesn’t seem too bothered. He might even be happy.

Notes/Warnings: cursing, fluff, eventual smut, angst, contract marriage, loss of rights, feelings of being trapped, poor parent/child relationships.

This will be a bunch of fairly short chapters/drabbles, but considering there are generous time skips, I felt like it made the most sense. This is also just kind of a tester chapter. Idk that anyone is going to like it. As always, comments can make my bad days worth getting through, so i’ll never not appreciate them. Reblogs and likes make me smile uncontrollably, but no pressure :)

Masterlist

Part 1 - Words: 1340

For too long, it was never spoken aloud. Not by your fathers. Not by your mothers. Not by aunts, uncles, brothers, sisters, cousins. And yet it was known. Expected. Silently proposed, accepted, and settled on long before you understood the role requiring your fulfillment upon your twenty-first birthday, long before you knew what a birthday even was. And it was non-negotiable. You would be Jake Seresin’s wife. You just didn’t know it. Because while everyone else had been well aware, they neglected to inform you.

-----

“You know we’re supposed to be dating, don’t you?”

That was the first thing a freshly graduated, 23-year-old Jake Seresin told you within his first week back on Texas soil. He sipped his beer as he stared out at the nearly one-hundred guests thoroughly filling out the space of his parents’ backyard for his Homecoming party.

You watched the summer heat condensation trail onto his hand from the glass bottle as he took another sip. “Excuse me?”

He smiled and waved at the partiers that did the same for him, some dressed like Sunday church-goers—clearly his parent’s guests—others laying around the pool in bikini’s so small they looked like spring breakers looking for anonymous, uncomplicated sex—his guests for sure. Abs and tits dripped with droplets of chlorinated water, drawing wet lines down their bodies that forced an onlooker’s eye to follow.

Despite it all, Jake kept his attention on you. “Nineteen, right?”

With a pinched brow, you gave him a quick questioning glance.

“I mean I know we haven’t spent a lot of personal time together in the last decade, but I’m pretty sure your birthday is the same,” he said with a devastating smirk that briefly sputtered your heartbeat.

No wonder he knew all of these tight-bodied, made-up women. They probably threw themselves at him constantly if that was the look he was shooting their way. Their glaring at you suddenly made a mountain of sense. Jealousy at its finest, solely from his proximity to another girl.

“You’re nineteen.”

Oh…right. “So?” you replied, failing at casually taking a long drink of the soda in your own bottle. You coughed when a bit of the liquid travelled down the wrong pipe, sparking the snarky chuckles from the near-naked women thirty feet away.

“So,” Jake stretched the syllable, impressively without managing to sound like an immature child. “You’re a grown woman, I’ve finally finished college, it’s only a matter of time before our sides start to ache from our mothers’ nudging elbows.”

Your scowl at his guests dropped once his words sunk it, and you paused, forgetting about anyone else entirely. You let out an unattractive snort that would’ve bloomed a dark shade of pink across your cheeks and chest had not the lunacy of what he was saying overpowered any embarrassment. “You sound like a crazy person,” you said. “No wonder we stopped being friends when we were little.”

“Yea, I’m sure the four-year age difference in school had nothing to do with it.”

What thirteen-year-old wants a nine-year-old little girl following him around? Somehow it was still fresh. You’d cried for what felt like days after he’d yelled that and promptly walked off with his friends, leaving you alone in the park to twiddle your thumbs and try to hold in the tears until you made it back to your bedroom. You didn’t have other friends to turn to. And that hadn’t so much changed as you aged.

“Look, Seresin, I don’t know how drunk you are to have crafted whatever ridiculous thoughts you have in your mind, or maybe you’re fucking with me to give your friends a show, but whatever it is, just so we’re clear, I’m not going to date you.” You gave a sharp nod, your own form of a solid pat on the back for standing up for yourself and preserving your dignity in the face of a man so irritatingly attractive. Had you not known him from the moment of your birth, you might have thrown yourself at his feet and thanked him for the consideration of being his potential partner.

He was entirely unphased and made sure you knew it by the deep chuckle he released. “Pretty sure you don’t have a choice, sweetheart,” he said. “We could wait I guess, but it’s probably best we spend the next two years getting to know one another again, I’d think. I don’t have any intention of marrying someone who has grown to be a stranger.”

“What the hell are you talking about?”

-----

“Darling, stop this wild pacing,” you mother said from her seat. “It makes you look unhinged.”

To her credit, it got you to stop, but you stared at her with eyes likely wilder than a raging monkey. “Mom!”

“It’s not that big of a deal. He’s a handsome man. You’ll be fine.”

“You have got to be kidding me!” Your hands flew up in the air before they fell back to your sides, limp as a ragdoll beaten to death by fist after fist. “Why has no one, not a single fucking soul—”

“Language, young lady.”

“—ever fucking told me about this?”

“Y/N, your mouth!”

“Is that really what you care about right now!” you snapped, pointing a finger at her. “You and dad sold me off!”

She sighed, dejected at your outburst, and yet she still managed to look the prim, perfect woman she was, her hands delicately folded in her lap, legs properly crossed at the ankles. “That is not what happened.”

You scoffed. “Oh, no?”

Her head tilted and a manicured eyebrow rose. You’d recognize that gesture anywhere, too often from your childhood. She was waiting for you to get yourself together before she presented you with her speech. So you took a deep breath, allowed your arms to unweave from in front of your chest, and straightened your spine. She’d want more, but it was the best you were willing to give.

“When you were a baby,” she began, “your father and George Seresin merged their companies, as you know, and to ensure they each have a hand in the business after their deaths, they decided a merger of another form would be beneficial as well,” she paused as if that alone explained the madness, but then continued once it became clear you weren’t going to immediately snap at her. “You and Jake, as a couple, will run the company one day and—”

“And you didn’t think to share this with me?”

“Why tell you before it was necessary?”

“Jake knows!”

“That’s a recent development,” your mother said, shifting uncomfortably on the chaise longue. “And only because he inquired as to whether or not you currently have a boyfriend. Amelia felt it a good time to tell him that your relationship status with other men wouldn’t be worth the concern.”

Of course, he would get to know by asking a simple question. Of course, it would fall into his lap. His mother held a respect for him yours for you did not. A wife, for fucks sake. You would be his damn wife. And to the woman who birthed you, that acknowledgement couldn’t possibly be shown more casually. “Unbelievable,” you muttered.

“He’s very handsome.”

“As if that’s all that matters.”

She stood on her three-inch satin heels that clicked against the hardwood when she made her way over to you. A coco-butter-moisturized hand cupped your cheek. The other brushed the unruly hair from your face. “You could do much worse, darling, and I’m not sure much better. He could have waited to mention it, but he clearly wants to fall in love the old-fashioned way, and he’s willing to give you almost two whole years to fall with him.”

Smacking her hands away from your face, you took a step out of the cloud of Chanel perfume, and granted her a look that, directed at you, would’ve had you shrinking in your spot, but your mother stood firm.

“That’s not going to happen,” you said.

And you would make sure of it.

tags: @marvel-ousnesss @thespeeder @nobody7102 @marrianena @fangirlingoverfangirls @blue-aconite @my-soulmate-is-mycroft @dempy @chaoticassidy @alana4610 @hotch-meeeeeuppppp @dracosluvbot @smoothdogsgirl @smit41

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vizkopa · 1 year

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Damned if you Do (Devil!Doflamingo x Reader) Part 1

Oops, my hand slipped >.> Warning for blood/gore, religious themes, strong language and LOTS of smut in future chapters!

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Part 1: City of Angels?

“Forgive me father for I have sinned,” you said, sliding into the confession booth at the Church of St Mjosgard. “It’s been about…” you checked your phone screen, “…three hours since my last confession.”

There came a sigh from behind the screen. “[Name], I’ve told you, you don’t have to say that every time.”

You smirked. “Would you prefer ‘sorry Daddy, I’ve been naughty’?”

Father Rosinante choked, which he elegantly turned into a cough. “No! No, that’s quite alright. How did it go?”

You sat back with a huff, folding your arms across your chest. “He didn’t know anything. Must have been a bad lead.”

“Are you sure?”

“I was very persuasive.”

“Spare me the details.”

You sighed. “I’m running out of time, Father.”

“I know. Have faith, [Name].”

“Easy for you to say, you’re a priest,” you muttered.

“I know things might seem hopeless, but we can’t give in yet. I’ll keep digging. In the meantime, you should go home and get some rest. It’s been a long day.”

“Yeah,” you said, though you hadn’t slept properly in nearly a decade. “Yeah, I’ll do that.”

You stood to leave and as you exited the booth, you felt Rosinante’s reassuring hand on your shoulder.

“I’ll keep praying for you.” He squeezed lightly and then dropped his hand.

“I appreciate the gesture, Father,” you said over your shoulder, “but God gave up on me a long time ago.”

It was raining when you left the church. You pulled your hood up over your head and shoved your hands deep into your pockets, shoulders hunched against the downpour as you hurried across the street. It was just your luck, you thought. The last few weeks of your life and it looked like it was going to rain the whole time. You had moved to LA to escape the cold and the wet (among other things), but just like said other things, it too had followed you across the country, it seemed.

As you made your way down the street, you got the distinct feeling you were being watched. Your fingers closed around the consecrated knife in your pocket, senses on high alert. From a dark alleyway somewhere ahead of you, two yellow eyes peered out of the darkness. You felt a small thrill of fear before you realised who it was and relaxed.

“Hello, Law,” you sighed.

A man stepped out of the shadows. Except he wasn’t a man—not really. His eyes, though grey now he was in full view, still held a glint of something unnatural, and his canines seemed longer and sharper than any human’s.

“Are you hungry?” you asked him.

He shook his head. “I have information.”

“Let’s hear it then.”

“I found him.”

Your heart quickened at those words, but Law seemed reluctant to say more. “Well?” you prompted, growing impatient.

“[Name]… I don’t think it’s a good idea to go after him.”

You frowned. “Why?”

Law hesitated. “He’s… dangerous. Incredibly so.”

“So, what, I should just wait for my timer to run out and skip on down to Hell without putting up a fight?”

“I’m not saying that. I just… He’s powerful, [Name]. Way more powerful than me or any demon you’ve encountered before. You can’t win.”

“How do you know that?” You folded your arms.

“Listen,” Law took a step closer. “I don’t know his name, but I do know he’s high up the ladder. Perhaps a Marquis or a Lord. Maybe even a Prince. You can’t beat him.”

You sighed. “Thanks for telling me. I’ll see you around, Law.”

“Wait!” He hesitated. “If you… if you still want to find him despite what I told you… There’s a demon called Bellamy. He frequents a demon bar called Corrida. He might know more. But be careful.”

“I know the place. I’ll check it out. Thanks.”

Law melted back into the darkness without another word, and you continued on your way through the rain, contemplating the newly acquired information. Having a demon informant was certainly useful.

Law was an incubus, a demon that fed on sexual energy. In exchange for inside information into the inner workings of Hell, you would keep him ‘fed’, so to speak. It was a mutually beneficial arrangement and nothing more. Rosinante had never approved of the arrangement, but even he had to admit, the incubus had been invaluable thus far.

It only took a few seconds to make your decision. Ignoring your promise to Rosi that you would go home and get some sleep, you changed direction, offering a silent apology to the Father, and going in search of the bar Law had mentioned.

The street was little more than an alley, tucked between a dilapidated office building and a crumbling warehouse. A few loiterers smoking beneath the eaves of a closed club across the street wolf whistled as you passed, but you ignored them. Mortal men were hardly a threat to you these days. Not when your very soul was on the line.

A few patrons looked up as you entered the dark tavern. You ignored them as you made your way to a seat at the bar, gathering more stares as you went. By the time you had sat down, every pair of eyes in the room were fixed on you. You ordered a shot of vodka, which the bartender slammed down in front of you, sloshing liquor over the sides of the glass. You winced as the burning liquid spilled down your throat but ordered a second shot all the same. A demon in the corner stood up.

“You’re not welcome here, Hunter,” he growled.

You held your hands up. “I’m not here to cause trouble. Just looking for a drink and some answers.”

“You’ve had your drink and you’ll get no answers. Leave.”

“Well, that’s rather rude,” you said with mock hurt. “I’m just looking for a guy by the name of Bellamy. Anyone know him?”

A second demon stood up. Horns curled outward from amongst blonde hair and a long, forked tongue lolled out from between pointed teeth. “What’s it to you, Princess? Getting tired of your incubus friend? Fixin’ for some real demon cock?”

The bar patrons chuckled.

You sighed. “Listen, I’ve had a long day of beating up your hellish buddies and I’m real tired. If you could just direct me to your boss, I’ll be happy to get out of your way.”

Bellamy stalked up to you. “So, it was you who killed Caesar today,” he growled. The bar fell silent, and you felt the wave of disbelief and rage that rolled over the crowd. “You made a mistake walking in here, little girl.”

You cursed under your breath, hand slipping into your pocket to close around your knife. You felt the movement of air behind you, and you whirled, knife swinging in a wide arc. The demon who had been sneaking up to grab you from behind reeled backward, his throat gaping and spurting black blood. He fell to the ground and moved no more. There was silence for a beat, before all hell broke loose.

Ragged claws raked at your arm, tearing your sleeve to ribbons and you retaliated with a stab through the offending demon’s eye. You wrenched it out just in time to duck beneath another blow aimed at your head and lunged upwards, feeling the knife sink deep into the space between two ribs and the imminent weight of a body as it grew slack against you. Hot, black ichor poured over your hands and the knife slipped from your hold as the demon went down. You lunged after it, just narrowly avoiding yet another swipe of dagger-sharp claws from a third attacker.

Swearing like a sailor, you retrieved the knife and straightened to find yourself backed against the bar, a wall of bloodthirsty demons between you and the door. Bellamy had slunk away somewhere through the crowd, content to let the lesser demons do his dirty work. Well, there went your one and only lead.

“Enough.”

Though it wasn’t a shout, the word seemed to cut through the chaos like a blade, stilling everyone in their tracks. The dim gloom of the tavern was suddenly cleaved by a shaft of daylight, motes of dust dancing in the air. Some of the demons hissed and shrank away from the light.

A man stood in the doorway. Except that you knew as soon as you laid eyes on him that he was no ordinary man. An oppressive aura seemed to worm its way into the bar, seizing your heart with a cold fear that rendered you motionless. The demons around you all sank to their knees and bowed their horned heads in submission.

He stepped forward and without the halo of light from outside, you could finally see his face. He was beautiful—it was the only way you describe him. High cheekbones, a chiseled jaw, flawless tanned skin. His eyes were hidden behind a pair of white-rimmed sunglasses, but you could tell they were fixed on you. He grinned.

“I was wondering when we would finally meet, my dear,” he purred. An involuntary shudder ran through you and you held the blood-stained knife a little higher.

He stepped forward, the demons parting for him, until there was barely a foot of space between you. He was so tall, you had to crane your neck to look up into his face. His unnerving grin never faltered as he said: “kneel.”

You felt your body obey his command as if you were just a puppet and he your master. You sank to the floor at his feet, every muscle in your body tense as you tried to fight for control, but it was futile. The knife clattered to the floor as your fingers grew numb and heavy. The man reached out and cradled your chin in one large hand. His touch was like fire. You were sure he could see the fear in your eyes.

“You will make a fine Queen,” he said.

Finally, you were able to exercise enough control over your own body to wrench your face out of his hold.

“What?”

“I’ve been watching you a long time. So determined, so driven. Just what I need in a ruler to stand at my side.”

“Go fuck yourself,” you hissed.

He grinned. “There’s that fighting spirit I can’t wait to break.” He smoothed a hand over your hair, tucking the strands behind one ear. You cringed away from his touch. “You resist me now, but it won’t be long before you seek me out. I know your very soul, what you desire more than anything else in this world.”

“The only thing I want is to kill you.”

The demon king chuckled and a few of the demons in the room snickered along with him. You bared your teeth at them, but it was an empty threat. That all-encompassing power still held you tightly in its fist.

“My, my, what a temper. Will you hurt me, [Name]? Torture me like you tortured my underlings while they begged for death? Or will it be quick and clean so you can get back to your incubus whore?”

You could feel your pulse throbbing in your temples, muscles and tendons straining as you raged against your invisible bonds. Words would not come to you.

“I look forward to finding out.” He bent and pressed a lingering kiss to your cheek, your skin burning at the touch of his lips. “I’ll be waiting, my Queen.”

With that he was gone, and the invisible weight lifted from your limbs. You snatched up your knife and staggered to your feet and were out the door before any of the demons could react. As soon as you were outside, you vomited into the gutter.

It was him. The demon you’d been hunting all this time. The demon who held your contract.

Shuddering and heaving, you straightened, rain and bile and demon blood dripping off you onto the street, and you sprinted all the way home.

#one piece #doflamingo #donquixote doflamingo #trafalgar law #doflamingo x reader #trafalgar law x reader #donquixote rocinante #rocinante x reader #one piece fanfic #one piece fan fiction #one piece x reader

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hogwartsandhawkins · 10 months

Text

Prove Me Wrong

Chapter 4: Looking For Good

Prologue Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6

Summary: Telling Steve she has a new ride to school doesn't go so well.

Warnings: Swearing (but what's new) Billy bullying Max briefly. Also, Billy pressuring reader (Jess) into letting him give her a ride. (I include this because the reader says no after second-guessing her decision, causing Billy to push back, which can have some underlying themes for some, and I wanted to be sensitive to that.) As always, please let me know if I miss anything.

Word Count: 2.4K

Author's note: I know I know, I haven't posted in forever. Moving back to the States was an EVENT, to say the least. I have also been working on this for a while, many chapters are already written and I'll post them as soon as I feel they have been reread enough for them to be slightly okay.

Jess awoke that Sunday morning as she did every Sunday morning: already thinking of an excuse to not attend church that her parents would buy into. Luckily, she didn’t really need to think of one for long as she already had plans to invite Steve over to finally “help” him with his physics project. She was surprised her parents haven’t taken the hint by now, considering that she has been avoiding that place like the 10 plagues of Egypt ever since she experienced the capabilities of the upside down, and of course, Eleven. But since skipping downstairs and laying out why she refused to go was a blatant impossibility, she merely explained that Steve needed her help. Thankfully, she didn’t have parents like Steve. Instead of the guilt trip, she received a slightly disappointed “tisk” from her mother, who then told her they’d miss her.

Jess watched as her parents exited through the garage door, which was located next to the pantry in the kitchen, then proceeded to dial the Harrington’s line. She knew Steve would be up, as his parents were always explaining how if he wouldn’t go to church, he at least needed to be productive on his Sunday mornings, which involved him getting up at the same time as Mr. and Mrs. Harrington, at least when they were home.

“Yup?” Steve’s voice was groggy and laced with what Jess sensed as resentment, most likely caused by his mother’s usual “seize the day” spiel followed by her opening the blinds that shielded Steve’s bedroom from the unwelcomed amount of light.

“Good morning to you too, Harrington.”

His voice seemed to pick up a bit when he heard who was on the other side of the phone. “Oh hey, Jess, how’s your morning been? Better than mine I hope…” Steve’s voice lowered to a whisper at the last part he added.

Jess ignored the question and went straight into asking him to come over so they could finally get his physics project out of the way. With the promise of Steve being allowed to hide out for the rest of the day at her house and an afternoon nap, he quickly agreed and was knocking on the Logan’s door in no more than 20 minutes.

Steve set the box full of different shaped and sized lenses, stands, a light, and everything else Steve was instructed by Jess to bring. “So. How was Friday with Hargrove?” He visibly tensed as he said his name, shaking his head in disgust after thinking about it for too long.

“It was fine.” Jess tried to avoid eye contact as she began setting up his quick focal point experiment, bringing out the ruler as she set up the first lens.

“Fine? That’s all you have to say about a day with Hargrove? Fine?”

She couldn’t help but laugh at Steve’s response, “What did you expect?”

“Really?” was all he could say. He flipped the switch of the battery-powered light to “on”, and then gave Jess a knowing, disapproving look. She didn’t even have to look back at him to know exactly what Steve was expecting: a disaster.

“I mean, he, unfortunately, has a thing for my mom, I’m pretty sure. But it’s Hargrove. He’s gross. That’s about it.”

Jess didn’t know how to tell him that it really wasn’t that bad, or worse, that she may have had an okay time studying with him this weekend. She was also now realizing she didn’t know how to tell him that Billy Hargrove was under the impression that he would be taking her to school tomorrow morning.

She decided maybe the best approach was to do so while Steve was distracted, so as they continued replacing the lenses and repositioning the stand, she started out slowly. “So… you know how Max and Billy live, like, right down the street?”

“Uh-huh…” Steve didn’t look up from his notes, working out the equation for the last lens they set up.

“Well, Max and him were wanting to give me a ride Monday… To school I mean.”

Unfortunately for Jess, he was well aware Max and him just meant him, so he looked up from his notes, amused at the thought of Jess turning him down. “Ha! Did Hargrove throw a fit when you told him ‘No’?”

“He didn’t really accept ‘no’ for an answer…” Not that I exactly tried hard enough to tell him “No”.

Steve dropped his notebook on her coffee table with a plop and then turned back his attention to Jess, who was now holding a tight-lined smile on her face, ready for the anticipated ridicule she was about to receive. “Oh come on. You know, kid, you really need to grow a backbone.”

“I honestly think you’re making it out to be worse than it is. I mean, Max will be there. Plus, it’d save you the time and the gas. I’m like the opposite direction of school for you anyways.”

Steve considered this for about a millisecond before shaking his head rapidly, “I’m sorry, call me crazy, but it seems like you want him to pick you up.” When Jess didn’t answer right away, he continues, “Oh Jesus H, you’re not serious!”

“No! I don’t want him to, but I mean… I think he just wants to study one last time before school, you know, for the quiz and stuff…”

“Look, I don’t like the idea of you around him. When I came to that night in the back of that car and you weren’t there, I freaked.” He then lets out a sigh before continuing, “You just need to be careful with him is all I’m saying.”

“I am.” But that was a lie. There was nothing careful about what was going on. There was nothing careful about him coming over to her room, being able to look through the intimacies of her life. There was nothing careful about spending time at his home, alone with him. There was nothing careful about allowing herself to laugh at his jokes, or allowing him to buy not only her but her parents dinner. And there was nothing careful about getting in the car with him, giving him permission to take her wherever he wanted.

As if reading her mind, he ducked down slightly to meet her gaze, “Jess. I promise. You’re looking for good where there isn’t any.” He then gave her a sympathetic smile and picked up his notebook, continuing to jot down what he thought was the correct answer to the equation.

After a few hours and many corrections made by Jess, they were finally done with the physics lab. She assured Steve they could pick up the materials later and allowed him the couch to take that nap he was promised, and after she made sure she heard him snoring, she grabbed three muffins from the container in the fridge and walked over to the Hargrove/Mayfield household.

As it was three in the afternoon, she wasn’t sure whether Billy would be home from work, but seeing his Camaro in the driveway answered her question of whether or not to knock on the door. It seemed as though Max and Billy were the only two home, something Jess was grateful for considering her first run-in with Mr. Hargrove was not as pleasant as most of her run-ins with other adults. When Max opened the door, she looked excited to see her, but immediately looked behind her and shut the door, holding in her excitement until she was sure Billy couldn’t hear.

“Hey! Oh, you should have seen Dustin’s hair Friday! It was insane.” Max then realizes Jess is holding not one, but three muffins in her hand, and cocks her head to the left. “Are all of those for me?”

“Well, one is, but I’m actually here to talk to Billy for a few seconds. Is he here?”

Max took one of the muffins, bit into it, and then proceeded to talk in between bites. “Ew. Why?”

“It’s about him taking me to school on Monday…”

At this, Max’s distaste turns back into excitement. “Wait, we’re taking you with us?”

“Well, no, not anymore, I was thinking I’d stick to Steve taking me to school.”

“MAX! WHO’S AT THE DOOR?!”

“NOBODY!” Max rolled her eyes before continuing, “Please, please, pleeeaaasee let us pick you up tomorrow. He might actually not be such an ass if you’re there.” As she finished her pleading, the door swung open, with none other than Billy Hargrove standing at the entrance.

“Hey, princess, couldn’t wait to see me?” It was Jess’s turn to roll her eyes as she handed the remaining two muffins to Billy.

“Hey! Why does he get two?”

Jess ignored Max’s annoyed expression and proceeded to change the subject. “So I’m just going to ride with Steve tomorrow. Don’t worry about picking me up.”

Before Billy could respond, Max continued from earlier, “Tell Steve we’ll bring you to school in one piece.”

“You heard the little shit, we’ll make sure to take real good care of you. Plus, I need you in the morning.”

“Why?” Max’s look of disgust made a return, which seemed to irritate Billy as he coldly looked back at her and ordered her back inside.

“She can stay if she wants to stay.” Jess began to remember why she took a disliking to him in the first place. It was easy to forget how… awful... Billy could be if he wasn’t sitting there joking with you, actively trying to be nice to you. You’re looking for good where there isn’t any. The thought made Jess clench her jaw only slightly, but enough to make Billy notice. “Yeah, I’ll just ride with Steve. See you, Hargrove.” She then allowed herself to give him a short smile before heading back in the direction of her home.

He had only watched her walk away for a second until he decided he needed to catch up to her, not liking how that conversation ended. Billy pushed the muffins at Max without thinking and started striding after Jess. “Hang on there, Logan,” he mocked the way she spat out his own last name, “You gotta help me study before the quiz.”

“I don’t gotta do anything.” There it was: the attitude that Billy was sure they have gotten passed. It made him pull his body back in recoil, being discomforted by the thought that she may not have been warming up to him this weekend after all. Sure, it really had only been two days, but he was enjoying her company, considering it was better compared to who usually kept him company, and he could have sworn she felt the same, at least a little bit? “Look, I already promised I wouldn’t say anything about our reading sessions or your dad, okay? You don’t need to keep an eye on me. I’ll see you for our next project.”

“Keep an eye on you? Did I do something wro-“

“I don’t like the way you talk to Max.” She blurted out, which surprised both her and Billy, and when Billy couldn’t think of anything else to say, she continued, “I don’t like the way you talk to anyone actually. Or about anyone. Or with anyone. You- you’re just. You don’t…” Jess didn’t know any other way to say it, “You’re not a nice person, Billy. And I don’t have time for that. So thanks for the offer, but I’m not interested.” She stayed looking at Billy, who refused to look anywhere other than his feet. He began to run his tongue across his top row of teeth, mouth shut and downturned, and began to nod, as if he was thinking about what was said. He then looked up, still not at her, but to her house where he saw a familiar vehicle in her driveway: Pretty Boy’s BMW.

Makes sense. He thought to himself. “So I’m guessing King Steve didn’t approve when you told him, huh?”

The question irritated Jess even more. Not just for the mere fact that Billy didn’t believe she could make her own decisions, but just hours ago Steve accused her of the same. “I can decide for myself who takes me where. Thanks.” Silence. “Did you not listen to a thing I said? I said I don’t want to be around you because you’re an asshole, not because Steve said ‘no’!”

“Oh no, I heard you, Jess. It just seems weird to me that last night you were completely fine with me taking you and now when Steve’s over, you tell me to fuck off.”

“When did I ever say I wanted you to take me to school? When you asked me, or excuse me, told me you were taking me, did I once say, ‘yes’? Did I once ask you to take me to school?” Billy was now looking at Jess with an expression she didn’t recognize, which made her uncomfortable enough to look away.

“Can I take you to school tomorrow, please?” But the softness in his voice jerked her gaze back to him, trying to analyze him, to see if there was any hint of insincerity. He quickly looked over his shoulder before continuing. “You’re right. I didn’t ask. And I’m sorry. You don’t have to say yes, but shi-Max wants you to come with, and, I… want you to too. So.” This made Jess furrow her brows. In some ways, he was right. She had every intention of going with him until this morning. She wanted to help him study, considering how much work he put into their reading sessions this weekend. But of course, Steve was also right. There was no way around it, Billy was a dick. To his sister, to his sister’s friends, to her friends, even to his own friends.

When it was made obvious to Billy she didn’t seem ready to respond, he sighed and continued, “Look, I’ll be at your house at the same time I told you last night, if you don’t come out then I’ll leave, okay?”

“I’ll help you study.” Is all Jess said in response to his offer, and began to walk back to her house. Billy took what he could get and nodded after she had already turned away, and did the same, returning back to his house. Billy didn’t realize that Max stayed out by their doorway, attempting to watch the whole thing. Before he could give her shit for being nosey, he replayed Jess’s words in his head. “Give me those,” is all he said as he took the muffins from her hands and went back to his weights.

#billy hargrove #billy hargrove fanfiction #billy hargrove stranger things #billy deserved better #billy hargrove imagine #billy hargrove x reader #billy stranger things #billy x reader #billy hargrove antis dni #antis dni #stranger things #stranger things 4 #stranger things 3 #stranger things 2

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lesbianlotties · 1 year

Note

🥺 w/Avatrice

🥺you sleep with the stuffed animal I won you??

Ava tried to convince herself that it was good that they defeated Adriel, that they all survived, and that they could go back to life at the Cat’s Cradle and go on missions to do good in the world without too much emphasis on a church in shambles and real or fake Gods.

However, she missed Switzerland. Switzerland, of course, was a code word for saying she missed living with Beatrice, spending almost every minute of the day by her side, sharing their meals, sharing their lives, and sharing a bed at the end of the day. Sure, she’d successfully admitted her feelings and even dared to kiss Beatrice, but that was in the middle of an epic battle. Back in their everyday lives, it wasn’t so easy. They both had too many responsibilities and distractions and nuns surrounding them the entire day.

If anything, Ava thought she was way too strong for lasting two full days before showing up at Beatrice’s room in the middle of the night because she desperately missed her.

Ava knocked on the door as softly as she could and waited restlessly for Beatrice to open the door. When she finally did, the sight of Beatrice in her pajamas, her hair down, her face relaxed and sleepy, so familiar after all those nights in Switzerland, was almost enough to bring Ava to tears.

“Hey Bea,” Ava said softly, “I’m sorry if I woke you up or anything. I just… I missed you, you know?”

Beatrice’s initial surprise softened into an expression much more tender and intimate. “I miss you too,” she admitted with that particular smile that she had reserved only for Ava.

“Can I come in?” Ava asked, tilting her head a little to the side and giving Beatrice her best smile. “Please? I just want to be close to you and I think it’ll be so embarrassing if Camila finds me asleep here on the floor of the hallway in the morning.”

“Of course,” Beatrice agreed with a fond chuckle and stepped aside to let Ava enter her bedroom. However, a second later, she seemed to remember something important. “Wait! Ava…” she said, but it was too late.

“Oh! Oh my God, is that what I think it is?” Ava laughed with that characteristic excitement of hers. “No way. Is that… Is that Saint Panda?!” She skipped toward the bed and picked up the stuffed animal she’d won for Beatrice at a festival she’d begged to go to when they were still in Switzerland. She’d only used a little bit of the halo’s power to get that little panda that, apparently, Beatrice kept with her in bed when she slept.

“It is,” Beatrice sighed deeply and, as she closed the door behind her, she looked like she’d never forgive herself for not hiding the incriminating panda before opening the door at all.

“You sleep with Saint Panda in bed?” Ava asked, her eyes were wide and earnest, and her smile was absolutely breathtaking. She was cradling the stuffed animal to her chest, and staring at Beatrice with all the love in the world. It made Beatrice think that maybe it wasn’t so bad that she’d gotten caught.

“Well…” Beatrice said and slowly approached Ava. “I missed you. He reminds me of you,” she admitted quietly.

Ava bit her lip and Beatrice knew that she must have been making a lot of effort not to make fun of her for this one. But, apparently, Ava missed her enough to miss the opportunity to tell God knows how many jokes passing through her head. Beatrice would probably hear all of them the next morning. But, at the moment, Ava only smiled and asked, “So, can I stay?”

“I would love that,” Beatrice replied.

“Cool,” Ava sighed. It was the sweetest thing, Beatrice thought, the way Ava looked genuinely relieved, as if there was a serious chance that Beatrice would’ve turned her away. Then Ava held the stuffed animal in front of her face and told him, “Thank you for your service, Saint Panda, but your company won’t be needed tonight after all. Have a good night.”

Ava placed the panda on the bedside table and then turned to Beatrice and threw her arms around her, hugging her tightly. Beatrice was taken aback, but she reciprocated the hug immediately. It finally felt like they were back home.

#saint panda we love you <3 #avatrice #warrior nun #ava x beatrice #beatrice x ava #wn #ava silva #sister beatrice #warrior nun fanfic #avatrice fanfic #prompts #answered #my fic #la-reine-des-enfers

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madderot · 1 month

Text

Confession.

“Forgive me father, for I have sinned. It has been– many years since my last confession.”

It didn’t feel right. It never had, but especially now, he was almost at a loss for words. Leaned back against the wall of the confessional, hat resting in his lap, he stared up at the low ceiling of the claustrophobic box, trying to choose his words carefully.

“I’m a liar, father. Don’t remember the last time I even bothered tellin’ no one the full truth.”

“Why’s that, my son?” The priest was calm, the easy going demeanor making the outlaw squirm. He’d bet he’d heard that kind of confession countless times before, and the casual nature of the inquiry made him uneasy, knowing he had much worse to say beyond this sin.

“I- I feel like I got so much t’ hide. Ain’t never felt like I been accepted for who I am. My daddy didn’t want me, my mama took her life t’ get away from me-” He knew that last part wasn’t necessarily true- His mother had been a troubled woman, but that hadn’t made it any easier to find her body at eight years old. “There are jus’ some things I can’t accept about myself. So why would anyone else? I was born cursed, ain’t no way ‘round it.”

He heard the priest shift and take pause as he let out a slow sigh in an attempt to calm himself. “I mean, father, I… Fuck- sorry- I was born a woman, and it just ain’t right. I’ve never been- never wanted t’ be a woman. I’ve always been a man. N’ if anyone finds out-” He had to cut himself off with a sharp inhale, tapping his foot restlessly.

“I understand.” The priest broke the silence, skipping passing further judgement for the moment.

The silence lingered for just a short moment after that, before he felt like he could speak again without breaking down.

“I’m a bad man, father. I’ve lost my faith over th’ years, always feelin’ like this sufferin’ never ends. I’ve thrown out my morals jus’ t’ make a livin’. They tell stories ‘bout me in some towns. A man in red, takin’ bounties, killin’ in th’ name of money.” Somehow, this was easier to talk about than the lesser sins he’d started with. “Not cuz’ i wanna, but I gotta. M’ useless on a ranch, can’t settle down n’ start nothin’ on my own. Can’t marry, can’t have kids, can’t even stay in one place too long.” The dark ceiling was beginning to look too familiar, and he was itching to get out. “I’ll leave here today n’ go right back t’ pushin’ coke n’ killin’ for cash, n’ th’ only thing I’ll be prayin’ for is that I’ll never see ya’ again.”

The silence was deafening. After a moment of lingering on it, he set his hat aside and buried his face in his hands. “I’m sorry for these, and all my sins.” He finished out his confession into his hands, words muffled for the priest on the other side of the thin curtained wall.

“Well, my son,” The man started after leaving him to linger in his thoughts for just a moment too long. “It sounds like you know better. You’ve strayed from the light of the Lord, and you’re sick of the darkness.” He remained silent though the father’s words, hands coming to rest on his thighs. “There’s always hope, my child. You can choose to repent.”

The thought of redemption made him want to scream. There was nothing to make up for what he’d done, and if there was a hell, he was certain he’d be there sooner, rather than later.

“Pray, and do good deeds. You can’t undo what you’ve done, but you can strive to be a better person.”

He continued to sit in silence, fingers digging hard into his jeans. After what felt like an eternity but could only have been a few seconds, he cleared his throat softly, nodding solemnly to himself. “Yes, father…” Though he was sure they both knew he wasn’t going to change any time soon.

“My God, I am sorry for my sins with all my heart. In choosing to do wrong and…” He was surprised he remembered those closing words, the prayer coming easy to him even after over a decade of absence from the church. “In his name, my God, have mercy.” His fingertips came up to his forehead, crossing down to his chest and across to each of his shoulders, and he reached for his hat once more.

“Amen.”

#drabble tag #suicide mention /#briefly #no im not proofreading <3

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forthedancingandthethriving · 9 months

Text

Another collection of incorrect quotes

SMG4: How sure are you?

Meggy: Eighty-five to eighty-six percent.

SMG4: We’ve gone on much less.

-----

SMG4, on a call with Lil Coding in front of everyone: Where are you?

Lil Coding: I'm at school, duh.

SMG4: You better not be skipping school and at that arcade.

*skee ball machine alarm goes off in the background*

-----

Lil Coding: Every time I hear someone talking about updog, I’m torn between not wanting to fall for it and wanting to help them complete their joke.

CPU: Okay, but what is updog?

Lily: Updog is a long sausage in a bun, often served with ketchup, mustard, onions, and/or relish.

Bowser Jr: No, that’s a hot dog. An updog is when a new version or patch of an application is released.

Cody: No, that's an update. You’re thinking of the fourth largest city in Sweden.

Desmond: No, that’s Uppsala, where’s updog is the giant spider in Harry Potter.

Sage: That’s Aragog. Updog is a symbol conventionally used for an arbitrarily small number in analysis proofs.

Lil Coding: You’re thinking of epsilon. Updog is an upward-moving air current.

Lily: No, that’s an updraft. An updog is the modern version of a henway.

CPU: What’s a henway?? .. wait-

Lil Coding, grinning like an idiot: Oh, about five pounds.

-----

Viality: I’m going to need everyone to be straight with each other from now on. No more games.

Umbra: I’m always straight.

Abyssal: Oh, that’s the biggest lie you’ve ever told.

-----

Mario, faintly: With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.

Luigi, looking up with a tired look: Please tell me you’re not on the roof again.

-----

SMG3, calling SMG4: Hey, I'm gonna be a bit late.

SMG4: Again?

SMG3: Yeah, sorry.

SMG3: Take me to church came on, and I wasn't emotionally prepared, so I floored the accelerator by accident, and now I'm stuck in a ditch.

-----

Luigi: I am at a loss for words!

Lily, narrating: And despite being at a loss for words, Luigi lectured everyone else for the next 45 minutes.

-----

Ping: We still have our one phone call. We could call Antivirus or CPU.

Abyssal: I feel safer calling Antivirus.

-----

Mario: I am not out of control! I'm a law-abiding citizen!

HAL: Really? Name one law.

Mario: Don't kill people?

HAL: That's on me. I set the bar too low.

-----

Cody: How petty can you get?

Bowser Jr: I once edited a Wikipedia article to win an argument I was wrong about.

-----

SMG4: Lily...

Lily: Oh no, 'Lily' in b-flat.

Lily: You're disappointed.

-----

Nimbus: Y’know, maybe things aren’t so bad. I’m here. I got the nice ocean breeze. Just alone with my thoughts.

Leto: Hiiiiii, Nimbus!

Nimbus: GODDAMNIT!

-----

Lil Coding: That’s one of my biggest fears. Like, if I ever woke up as a donut...

Sage: You would eat yourself?

Lil Coding: I wouldn’t even question it.

-----

Bowser Jr: I'm incredibly fast at math.

Sage: What's 30x17?

Bowser Jr: 47

Sage: That's not even close.

Bowser Jr: But it was fast.

-----

Meggy: Why are Forum and Domain sitting with their backs to each other?

Juliano: They had a fight.

Meggy: Then why are they holding hands?

Juliano: They get sad when they fight.

-----

Mario: Oh, just so you know, it's very muggy outside.

SMG4: ...

SMG4: Mario, I swear, if I step outside and all of our mugs are on the front lawn...

Mario: *sips coffee from bowl*

-----

Forum: I got you flowers!

Domain: What did you do?

-----

Leto: We have fun, don't we?

Nimbus, drenched in water and nearly drowned twice: I have never been more stressed out in my life.

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kindheart525 · 6 months

Text

Heavenly Glow was seeing red.

She’d scoured the entire castle top to bottom and Sahar was nowhere to be found. Humiliated and disgraced, Heavenly had put herself through the trouble of explaining away her absence and searching for her and this was what she’d become? An international embarrassment?

That mare was in for it, Gaia willing!

If Sahar wasn’t out here Heavenly would surely send the royal guards after her. The Canterlot Gardens, this was her last chance to find her unless she’d gone frolicking through the city or left the country altogether. She wouldn’t put it past her.

Then she heard voices. She could hardly make it out but it sounded like giggling, laughing, in words she couldn’t make out. Like they were in a foreign language.

Sahar!

The hippogriff’s ears pricked up as her hooves started marching, making a beeline towards the source of the voice.

“SAHAR!”

Her voice boomed once she found her, galloping around like a careless foal with her mare-in-waiting in tow. She was part of this too! For shame!

“Your Majesty!”

Ginger Root was the first to panic, she knew this was a terrible idea and now they were paying the price for it. She practically buried her face in the dirt as she groveled apologetically.

“I mean, Grand Matriarch Princess of the Celestial Church Heavenly-“

“What in Gaia’s name have you been DOING!? This was the most prestigious dignitary dinner of the year and you skip it like it means NOTHING?”

“Why I should go and listen to you?”

Sahar retorted.

“All of the dignitaries have accused me of sin, that’s why! Word has even gotten back to Saddle Arabia, for Gaia’s sake. They say I am an unfit wife when YOU are the one who defies me time and time again! Do you think this is a joke? And you!”

Heavenly whipped around to face Ginger Root, who knelt trembling on the ground.

“You were hired to keep her in line yet you are an accomplice in this! I’m in my right mind to fire you for this!”

“NO!”

Sahar stepped in front of the unicorn mare, her face twisted in a rage that matched Heavenly’s.

“Fire her, you will NOT! She tries to make me go to dinner, I refuse! Blame her you cannot! Instead, blame me! No...blame YOU!”

She jabbed a hoof into the hippogriff mare’s chest, her voice rising in volume.

“You are a bad wife, ponies think, because you are! I try hard to learn Equestria culture, but for you it is not enough! Not ever! I work to make you happy, but to make me happy you do not care! Marriage this is not, we need to make EACH OTHER happy! At the wedding we promised it!”

Heavenly reeled back in shock. They’d had their fights but she’d never seen Sahar so angry. This wasn’t just defiance, but assertion. Like she was standing up for herself, not just her home. Heavenly couldn’t help but start to think she was right...their vows did say this was a give-and-take marriage. And she hadn’t done a whole lot of giving.

But she wasn’t about to back down and forget about the dinner debacle.

“And you think skipping an important international meeting is the answer? You disgraced us both in front of the whole world! This is greater than you and me! Of all nights to pick a fight of course you chose this one, by Gaia!”

“How else do you listen to me? I tell you many times how I feel, and you do not listen! Embarrass for the world I do not want also, but you embarrass just as much as me! I make bad choice one night, you make bad choice EVERY DAY!”

“Sahar, stop it! Calm down, please!”

Ginger Root wrapped her hooves around the Saddle Arabian mare, calling out to her in her native language and repeating herself in her own tongue. But neither plea did anything, Sahar was righteously angry and couldn’t be stopped at any costs.

“Marriage will not be long if you will not work with me! To protect Equestria AND Saddle Arabia, we both work! I do work always, you do work now! Do you listen!?”

Her mare-in-waiting managed to pull her back but Sahar’s eyes were still fiery hot with rage as she waited for her wife to answer her.

Heavenly herself had almost no words, she’d never met somepony so willing to lay into her like that. She felt powerless, almost shameful, like even the God Mother herself was disappointed in her. All she could do was utter out a weak reply.

“Yes...I suppose I must.”

~~~~~~~~~~

Previous: Dinner and Don't Show Next: Moving Mountains

Background by csillaghullo

#KindsArt #auraverse #arabian dawn #sahar #heavenly glow #diya #ginger root #story piece #next generation #my little pony #mlp fim #mlp g4

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rubykgrant · 1 year

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(Have a tiny bit of the Caboose interview! I’ll add more to this later, because we all know how much Caboose can talk about Church, but this was a really important bit that has been rolling around in my head for a while~)

She thought she had prepared herself for this particular interview, but she should have known better; nobody is ever prepared for Caboose.

Not that it was always a bad thing, it was just impossible to fully predict what was going to happen.

“Hello!” he greeted her cheerfully.

“Hello, Caboose. I’m glad you wanted to be part of these new interviews… and I’m sorry again, about startling you that first time we met. I know you said you were fine, but I was honestly so WORRIED-”

“Aw, that’s OK, really. And you got better at talking to people. This time, when you said you had questions for me, I didn’t fall off a cliff or anything! Good job!” Caboose was clearly trying to be supportive, and it made her laugh at the irony; it was usually reporters who had to put people at ease so they were willing to open up… and yes, once upon a time, Andrews had been a bit rough around the edges when she tried to get a story. While it had been an accident, startling Caboose and causing him to stumble backwards the first time they met, she probably would have been rather forceful with her questions. Perhaps even unkind.

Well, she knows better now. Still tough when need be, but more gentle and understanding.

“Thank you. I hope I keep doing a good job helping all of you tell your stories,”

“I bet you will. So, which stories do you want me to tell? I know a lot of really neat ones…” Caboose tipped his head to one side thoughtfully.

“Well, if you can, I have some questions I was hoping you would answer- about the things that happened to you before you met everybody in Blood Gulch, and what happened after you got there. Questions bout your thoughts and feelings,” Andrews said, a tone of warmth in her voice. “All you have to do is answer honestly. It’s also fine of you don’t want to answer a question, we can skip a topic and move on to something else. Sound good?”

“Yeah, that does sound good!” Caboose happily replied. “I had my own show once where I asked my friends questions about themselves, and they would give me answers, except those were in my dreams, and that’s how I knew when they weren’t being honest, it’s really easy to tell when a dream is lying, even when they say the exact same things my friends would say when we’re all awake, because those times I can’t be sure if they really mean everything or not!”

“Oh…I see?” she didn’t really see, but that never stopped Caboose before.

“We also used to answer questions for other people a lot, but most of those didn’t really happen, and sometimes only a few parts of them were real, but it was different than when I just imagine things, because sometimes my friends also remembered the things that didn’t happen, but they don’t always remember why we were doing the things we never did, or who the questions came from, or how we knew the answers to them, but that’s alright, because we’d probably give different answers now, anyway!”

Caboose gave a single definitive nod.

“Is some of that… because of the time-traveling? The Paradoxes?” Andrews asked.

“Probably! If it wasn’t because of the pair-of-boxes before, it is now that it happened,” that actually made sense, in a round-about kind of way. If it was good enough for Caboose, it was good enough for Andrews.

“You know what, good point. Well then, let me start with a BIG question… and remember, you can skip it if you don’t want to talk about it,” Andrews reminded him, and Caboose nodded. “Alright. I think everybody who has ever met you knows how much you like Church-”

“A LOT,” Caboose said firmly.

“Indeed. My question is- why? What was it about Church that made you like him so much?”

“Hmm… well, he was just really cool. I could tell right away, Church was awesome!” Caboose told her. “I liked talking to him a lot more than some of the other people I met before I got to Blood Gulch. I don’t know what words to use to make it make sense, but Church was like… really interesting by accident. He didn’t always want you to think he was interesting, but he WAS. I wanted to hear what he thought about things, so I would tell him about all the things I thought of too. It was hard at first, because Church yelled a lot… you remember seeing him for a minute, in the time-window, right?”

“Yes, I remember. I also saw old footage of all of you at Blood Gulch,” Andrews replied. “It seemed like Church was very… frustrated,”

“Yeah, he always acted like he was mad at everybody else, and didn’t need them. But then I figured out he was mad at himself. And he thought nobody needed him,”

Caboose said that so simply, with a touch of sad fondness. For a moment, it surprised Andrews.

“Really? How- how did you figure that out, Caboose?”

“Um, well, that’s also hard to explain so it makes sense, because it just kinda made sense in my head one day, but not with words?” he gave a small shrug, not of indifference, just an acceptance of this fact.

“You mean like a feeling?” she offered.

“Yes. Just like I knew Church was cool, I knew he also felt sort of… bad. I didn’t know WHY, though. Tucker says he figured out Church was an AI before everybody else, and YEAH, maybe he DID, but Tucker didn’t know right away! Nobody knew, not even Church. But he still felt like something was wrong… Epsilon told me once- that Alpha was really good at fixing problems, but after he got hurt so many times, he felt like he couldn’t fix anything. Church didn’t remember that he was Alpha, but he still had those bad feelings… he was afraid of people needing him, and then hating him because he couldn’t fix things like he wanted. He still tried, though. One time, when he exploded, and we all thought we time-traveled away, Church kept trying to fix things so nothing bad would happen to us. He tried over and over again, but it never worked, so he finally decided to just come back and be exploded with us!”

“Now THAT sounds like one of the time-travel paradoxes,” Andrews wondered how many different versions of reality the Reds and Blues actually experienced.

“Oh, no, that was something different... but it was when Church learned the mean word from Gary, and THAT was part of the time-travel stuff we did later. And Before,” Caboose clarified.

“Alright... we might need to sort through that, eventually. For now, go ahead and keep telling me about Church,” Andrews said.

“Well, no matter how much he yelled and acted mean, Church kept trying to fix things, he just didn’t want anybody to know he cared so much. I knew he cared, though. I knew he was lonely, too. Even when he told people to go away, that’s not really what he wanted… Church HATED when he missed things. He would complain about missing stuff all the time. Church was... really, REALLY important. Not because he was the Alpha AI, but because of how much he cared, and how hard he tried to fix things, even when he said he hated everybody. That’s just what Church was like,”

Caboose let out a soft sigh, and looked down at his hands in his lap. He didn’t seem terribly upset, maybe even a little satisfied to finally explain his thoughts, his feelings. Well, that was the point, after all.

Andrews knew that Church was a tender subject, and this included both Alpha and Epsilon, who had both been their own Church. Both had also been very important to the Reds and Blues, ESPECIALLY Caboose. Andrews regretted being so blunt and callous about the loss of Epsilon after Chorus… and she hadn’t fully understood why Alpha had been so missed. The moment during the time-window conversation and all those recordings of the early days had given her a glimpse, but that was all.

“Caboose?” Andrews spoke after taking a few seconds to gather her thoughts. Caboose looked up at her with a pleasant little hum of interest. “I think you explained that so it made sense PERFECTLY,”

“Really?”

“Yes. Thank you for telling me more about Church. I feel like I know him a little better now,” she smiled to herself, and was fairly confident that Caboose was also smiling inside his blue helmet.

“You’re welcome! I am the BEST at remembering Church, after all!” he said proudly. “That’s how I helped Epsilon at first, I told him about Church, and then Epsilon told me about Alpha. Some of it was in the message Epsilon left just for me, but some of it was just when we were talking... he didn’t know what was wrong at first either, but Epsilon also felt bad. The people who made the AI hurt them, too. Then made them forget it. It’s hard to feel better when you don’t know why you’re hurt... but when Epsilon remembered, he tried to fix things, for Alpha, and the other AI, and all of us. He tried too hard, and now he’s gone... but I still remember him, and Alpha. So do my friends. And now, we can help each other feel better, and remember the good things!”

“I’m glad to hear that. I’m sure Church would be glad you remember good things about him, too...” Andrews said.

“Yep. OH, I thought of something good, like, a title for my part of the story! Most of the stories I know all have titles. Does that work, can you use something like that?” he asked.

“Sure. What is it?”

“Memory is The Key,” Caboose spoke these words with affection and admiration. Andrews had to agree, it was a very fitting title.

#red vs blue #rvb

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targentis · 21 days

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- What's your favorite character arc?

- What's your favorite details you noticed about the game?

- What's your favorite character design?

- Do you have any hcs/things you'd like about less popular characters ( the church staff, students like Raphael or Caspar, random npc )

- Idk if you particularly care about shipping, but do you have any rarepair? ( Ok, tbh that one is because of your Rodrigue fic because it was delightful. And because I saw you liked Ferdinand/Dimitri- )

- Do you have any hcs around the characters family? ( This one might also be because of your Rodrigue fic- )

- ALSO is there any platonic dynamic, especially less popular, that you care about?

- Group dynamic too! I'm pretty sure your favorite is the blue lions, but is there anything particular you enjoy/notice about the houses? ( including the Church staff! And it can consider recruits too, as well as either pre or post time-skip )

- This one is a bit cheessy but is there any song you associate with three houses in some way?

( Sorry I know it looks a bit like an interview, feel free to only answer the question you want! And I might not like/reblog your answer bc I'm shy but I'll garantee you that I will have read it! Thanks you if you decided to answer :) )

wowa sure i’ll answer all these why not HDSNDJSN

gotta say dimitri has my favorite character arc 💪💪💥💥💥💥🔥🔥🔥👆👆👆 they literally gave him a trauma recovery arc and it wasn’t even bad. we love the psychotic rep in this game 💪💪💪💪 the healing 💥💥💥💥💥💥 the sexy also 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

THE FACT THAT YOU CAN JUST. WALK AROUND ON BATTLE MAPS TO EXPLORE THEM. I’M STILL NOT OVER THIS, THEY DIDN’T HAVE TO DO ALL THAT, AND YET…

oogh. this is a Hard One. all the character design in this game slaps so hard. i’ll probably have to say post timeskip Edelgard takes the cake for me though because like…that headdress…the gravitas of the whole getup…never seen anything like it before

I LOVE CORNELIA 💥💥💥💥💥💥 i know i already talked about my trans headcanon for her but like genuinely…..she is so fascinating to me…what is trans Agarthan culture like…one must wonder…

LMAO the Rodrigue fic was a commission but i am a Rodriguela supporter forever 🫡🫡🫡 other than that yeah i like Diminand (but i’m a Cymitri truther and Yes this counts as a rarepair to me), Ashelix, whatever Ferdinand and Felix is called but Specifically as exes…i think that’s it off the top of my head. i also ship Cornelia with Valter from Sacred Stones but that’s a whole nother can of worms

OUUUU tbh i think All of my family hcs came out in that one Felix fic that everyone sleeps on HDBSBDJS i just i just i love thinking about Glenn……..and what would happen if Felix just went to therapy ONCE……… Rodrigue is a good father idc what anyone says

yes i think we were robbed of Claude and Hubert supports and i’ll die on this hill. they would have been such incredible worsties. i also really like Lorenz and Ferdinand as the most insufferable friends on the planet. and Annette and Dimitri have such cute supports that i never hear anyone talk about…faerghus four my ass, Annette is Dimitri’s REAL sibling figure ‼️ speaking of the faerghus four i hate that dynamic. Dedue and Dimitri have thee most beautiful friendship and ppl want me to believe he has a comparable relationship with the snotty rich kids he grew up with? get real. that being said Felix and Sylvain have that Exact lasting childhood bond that everyone seems to want Dimitri to have with the rest of them so. i like those two as besties i have a lot of feelings about that.

its so interesting that the Blue Lions come off as my favorite group dynamic because like…i gotta say they’re probably my least favorite as a group AKDKSNSKSA i LOVE the Black Eagles for this. (i am totally neutral on the Golden Deer. i have like zero opinions on them and i am sorry 😔) specifically though i think what gets me about the Black Eagles is that they have this…communal vibe, i guess? it makes it easy to imagine them all like hanging out with each other even though they all have such STRONG personalities. the Blue Lions…i just get the sense that they’re not all very compatible with each other if that makes sense??? it feels like i’m at an awkward family dinner every time i see them all together. it could just be that i like almost all the BE whereas there are quite a few BL i strongly dislike HHDBWNDN because recruiting my faves makes this less unbearable. also i fucking love the church staff…i especially love how supportive all the professors are of each other, and how Byleth really feels like they have a community around them while working at Garreg Mach… Gatekeeper i love you………

yes i do actually and it’s PVP by Amaranthe. i don’t actually know WHY that song makes me think of this game, the lyrics aren’t really applicable, but i have such a vivid animatic in my head every time i hear it so there you have it.

#beneath the ask #anonymous #THANK YOU FOR THIS……#i am exhausted and ill and In Bed but this was fun to answer #feel free to send as many as you want and also tell me your thoughts….

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cloudcountry · 6 months

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Ooo, I’ll keep that piece of Ikevamp lore in mind!! 👀 Thank you! >w<

While I was around for the Zero hype, I only saw some of it— I don’t know the full extent of how down bad you are for him, but then again, you’ve made him your profile picture, so maybe I should already have a good sense of it jkdfngk— /j /lh

And speaking of Ikevamp!! I wrote a little bit for that Beethoven fic, but I only made discombobulated bits and pieces kjdfgn— If you don’t mind, I’ll share two snippets,,! 👀👉👈 (Tbh, the fic isn’t going to drop in a fairly long time because I don’t have much time to work on it, unfortunately,, It’s a bit messy, and these are kinda loose ideas, so they’re not final, but I hope you like them regardless!)

~~~

Ludwig van Beethoven, seven years old: *he and his father, Johann, are on their way to the music hall where Ludwig will give his debut performance*

Ludwig: Papa? How many people will be there?

Johann: Quite a few, but don’t be nervous. Remember what we’ve practiced, and you’ll be alright. Many musicians I know will be there as well. I will introduce you to them after your performance; they’re quite influential! I’m sure they’ll take a liking to you.

Ludwig: *he hums in response* *thankfully for Ludwig, whether it was due to his youth or confidence, he didn’t feel nervous like many others would before their debut performance*

Johann: Oh, and Ludwig? From now on, you will address me as ‘Father.’ All the other children call their fathers ‘papa,’ and you are no ordinary child. You are not like them. You are far more brilliant, far more talented; the next Mozart!

Ludwig: Yes… Father. *he presses his lips together; the word sounded odd on his tongue, but if Johann wanted him to call him that, he would. If not because he wanted to make his father proud, then if only because he didn’t want his father to be mad at him - he had a terrible temper, after all*

(Time Skip - Beethoven, now an adult, is slowly losing his hearing)

Those ringings in Ludwig’s ears were like the death knells of a church bell. They signalled the impending doom of his hearing, and whenever they rang their high-pitched intonations, everything sounded just a little further away. It wouldn’t be long until he felt like his head was submerged underwater; everything sounded distant and far away. Even now, as he played the piano in his room, he needed to strain his ears to properly hear the tune he was creating.

He closed his eyes to focus the entirety of his senses on the sound from the piano. As he squeezed his eyes shut tighter, he felt his growing despair gnaw at his heart.

Music can change the world. He believed that as a child, and even now, he still did with his whole heart. So why was it that the music was falling silent?

It should have been my eyesight, Ludwig thought. But then how would he be able to write down his music if he couldn’t see?

It should have been his sense of taste, he reasoned. Food was nothing more but mere sustenance to him, anyway. He couldn’t even find joy in eating his favorite food anymore. He was a musician, Ludwig thought bitterly. The vibrant music he heard and produced were his food, the fruits of his labour, his love, his passion. If he couldn’t even have that, what else was there?

~~~

Oh, but I do have one more Ikevamp question!! You said that pureblooded vampires can bring people back to life as lesser vampires; is Comte a pureblooded vampire? I tried checking the fandom wikipedia, but the categorisation on him confused me nmfgbd 💀 Oh, and also,, does it say in the game how tall the MC is? Because I tried estimating her height out of curiosity judging from CGs, and she’s,,, REALLY short 💀 Like, she’s either 4’11 or 5’0 in the CGs I’ve seen 💀 5’1 if we really want to stretch it- Which is kind of a shame, because I was hoping that MC could be the same height/taller than Beethoven JFGGBFB

On one last note!! Next week I have to perform an original monologue with a character who has a god complex kfjghb- I hope I do decent,, TwT Also!! My birthday’s coming up soon! :D

[Oh, and before I forget- I’ve written down a bunch of random TWST thoughts/ideas,, Would you like me to drop them,,? 👀👉👈]

Jackdaw Anon 🐦

AAAAA NO YOU DONT UDNERSTANDNDN &%$^!@$^%!@$^!@%$@! ZERO IS SO . HE IS EVERTTHI9GN .. GHES SO GERAT HES REALLY JUST SP GREAT . HES SUCH A HARD WORKING ERSON AND EVEN THOUGH I WISH HE DIDNT HAVE TO WORK SO HARD FOR THRE ASONS HE WORKS SO HARD HES ASO RELIABLE ANYWAY AND THAT MAKES HIM SO AMAZING AND I LOVE HOW SQWWEET AND STRONG AND WONDERFUL AND DETERMINED HE IS, HES WORKED SO HARD TO BE WHERE HE IS NOW AND HE OPNE EDUP TO THE MC ENOUGH TO REALLY CONNECT WITH HER AND BECAUSE OF THAT HE GETS REWALLY BLUSHY SOMEOTHIMES AND ITS LITERALLY THE SWEETETS THING YOU COYLD EVER WITNESS BECAUSE HE DOESNT WANT TO LET HER GOP EEVEN THOUGH HE KNOWS HE HAS TO CEVNETUALLY AJHJSGHKAWDGKJFWESHILESFWHLJIUJEWRSFGHOYIU

beethoven is so kickass for that HES BOYBOSSING RN HELL YEAH GET THAT PIANO!!!!! ALSO YES comte is a pure blooded vampire, along with vlad and leonardo ^^ i checked the ewiki and it said greater vampire so i can see how that confused you LMAOOO

UR SO REALF OR THE MC SHORT THING.....ugh the on saving grace is that the avatars are basically the saem height (at least isaac and shakespeare are...theyre the only ones ive had in my room AHGSFD)

HAPPY EARLY BIRTHSAY OMG?!?!?!? I HOPE YOUR MONOOLOGUE GOES WELL!!!!!

ofc you should totally drop them C:<

#jackdaw anon <3

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starryeyedrogue · 2 years

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mental health update

hey everyone. this’ll inevitably be a long one, so feel free to skip. TLDR: hiatus; mental health update (as mentioned).

tw: depression, anxiety, dark thoughts.

like I said above, this’ll be a long one, sorry. this spring has been a hard one. there’s no real reason why, but it has. I don’t have a job. I’m not going to school. my home life is fine, normal. even still, I can’t get out of this hole. I’ve always known I have depression, since probably 4th grade, but it’s never taken physical form. I’ve skipped church/events for weeks thinking I had covid or some other sickness, but after some research and lack of typical illness symptoms, I realized it was my depression. my body aches constantly. headaches and migraines are constantly around the corner. I haven’t slept well in weeks, months. my comfort activities (gaming, D&D, writing, painting/drawing, cooking/baking, music) don’t do anything anymore. it’s hard to get out of bed most mornings, though I pass it off as the overly warm or cold temperature and the fact that I’m not a morning person. my mom was the one who noticed these things first; she’s been where I am, so she knew the signs. I don’t know how I didn’t notice sooner; it’s my own mind and body. I keep having dark thoughts, too. not of suicide, I would never, but the typical depression things of “I shouldn’t have been born” or good old “everyone secretly hates me. that’s why I don’t get responses. that’s why no one’s noticed. no one cares, just stop talking already and leave them alone.” I don’t do self harm, either, but my habit of anxiously picking the skin on my fingers is slowly progressing into constantly having raw skin and blood on my hands. I try to stop, but I keep zoning out (ADHD) and find myself with stinging thumbs. I know full well I need to get over myself. I’m a grown adult. I don’t have “real” responsibilities like bills, a job, or schooling, and I don’t have a significant other to worry about. I worry about my friends and family, of course - guilt of not reaching out or doing better is killing me - but my habit of checking on my SO to make sure they’re not cheating on me or somehow hurting themselves at work isn’t there.

constant pressure from family is eating away at me. I know I need a job. I know I need to do something with my life. but I can’t. even remembering to mask, eat, drink, and take care of myself in general is painfully hard. I’m in the process of “repairing my mask” and looking for a job that suits me, but it’s hard to do when even my favorite things don’t spark passion and joy in me.

I posted a quick message on facebook a few days ago asking if anyone wanted to join a oneshot D&D game. all I asked for was that no one makes fun of my religion, Christianity. my post was taken down over “bad religion and agendaposting” (not at all my intentions), and I got hundreds of hate comments in minutes. I think that’s what made me realize how bad it is, my depression I mean. I cried for two nights straight, barely managing to keep my mask up around others. it’s stupid, but I can’t mask anymore. it’s just gone. tears keep coming, even if there’s no good reason. I don’t want to tell my closest friends and family members because I don’t want to burden them with this. I know they’ll see it, but still. I’m sorry.

I’ll still be doing D&D every week, since talking to my ridiculously feral best friends helps a lot and writing campaigns distracts me for a bit, but I won’t be posting much, if any. I’ll queue enough for the week and respond to my asks & tags, but unless I get more I won’t really be here. I’ll be back before next week I’m sure, or I’ll probably post a few small things here and there to distract myself (seems to be the larger amount = how bad I feel when I rb a lot, which makes no sense. I’ll mostly be offline thought). I’m only posting this so no one worries; I’ve seen people go MIA on here and I’ve felt that worry and fear that something’s happened. it’s nothing against any of you, I just need time. that said, if anyone comes forward needing advice or help of any kind, I’ll still do what I can. I’ll always be here for all of you, no context or previous friendship/conversations needed. if anyone has any tips to deal with this or the dumb things that seem to help me with this (i.e. dumb jokes, anything pippin related, dog/pet pics, plants/woodsy pics, recipes, etc), please share. please let me know. nothing I’m doing is working. thank you in advance <3

#please skip if you don't want to deal with bad mental health crap #i don't want to seem that way but I literally cannot reach out first right now. i'm so sorry #i desperately want to talk to my friends/family for the sake of talking but can't for some reason so please reach out first #roguespeaks #mental health update #depression #anxiety

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sonicsuns · 1 year

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So apparently they made an AI-generated beer commercial...

At a glance it looks real. Another glance shows it to be really weird and distorted. Where will we be a year from now? Two years? Five? What will the world be like in 2030? AI will probably continue to improve at a rapid pace. What effect will that have? I can imagine a world where all the content creators lose their jobs very quickly. I can imagine a world where misinformation gets stupidly out of hand, at least for awhile. I can imagine AI having wild effects far beyond the world of art, but let’s stick to art for the moment. Let’s try to think of some positives. There are a lot of people out there with cool ideas but they don’t have access to expensive moviemaking equipment. This will be a big help to them, right? Likewise in other fields, like writing and art. I guess we need to reflect on what we actually want here. If we want art to be a genuine expression, we need to ask how much art was genuine even before AI. Surely there are people who write things they don’t actually believe, and artists who make art they don’t believe in. Think back to those famous religious paintings from the Renaissance; I’m sure some of those things were painted by closeted atheists who chose their subjects not because they were personally inspired but because the church had all the money and this was the only thing the church would pay for. So if AI starts making art that isn’t based on genuine feelings...well, some percentage of art was already in that category. Maybe this is an opportunity to reflect on what’s genuine and what’s not. Maybe we should do a better job of forging actual human relationships. Maybe we need to know ourselves better. On that note, how much do we value making art, as opposed to the finished product? Sometimes the process of creation has its own value, and we’d lose out if we skipped ahead. Other times that’s not the case, and we’d be smart to take a shortcut. It depends on what the process is and who’s doing it. Speaking more broadly, AI might end up taking everybody’s job in the end. At that point we’ll have two options: Either we let everybody starve, or we adopt Universal Basic Income. (I vote for the latter!) But maybe employment won’t be our first concern. Maybe AI will lead to new forms of warfare. Or maybe it’ll produce new kinds of medicine. Or both! Some people will jump into this too quickly, and others will be too cautious. It’s very hard to know in advance what the right choice will be. I think AI is going to have a very large impact in the years to come. In fact we might be living on the edge of an explosion, metaphorically speaking, where everything is about to change at a dizzying pace. Of course I could be wrong about that. Maybe this is that part of the Hype Cycle where expectations are at their peak before they dive down again. But right now advances are coming very rapidly, and there’s no obvious upper limit to what AI can do. I think AI will have many large effects on society. Some effects will be good and some will be bad. Some effects will be intentional and others will be unintentional. Some effects will be obvious and other effects will be subtle. Perhaps the best we can do is try to stay aware of it, so we aren’t taken completely by surprise.

#AI #articifial intelligence

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cripplingparanoia · 6 months

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Hai!

My name is Daisy. I just turned 20 about a month ago. I’m still trying to figure everything out. I don’t feel like I’ve really gotten very far, but I guess at least I’m not where I started.

I’m working on a book right now. I’ve always wanted to write so much, but then there’s the whole, y’know, writing part…

I’ve felt very lonely for a long time. I always wanted to write to fill that void. I’ve always wanted to get online too. It’s been very difficult to find the right online spaces in my life. When Minecraft was relatively new, I got it on pc for my birthday, so I was allowed to have internet for the first time. That was my first time truly “online”

I joined some servers, and made some friends. We’d write our emails put on two signs to get past privacy restrictions. I even had a Minecraft boyfriend for 3 months! Lmao.

I don’t truly know what ever happened to any off them, but I was so young then anyway.

After that I got really into Pokémon again, hardcore. There was a league who played cards at the mall near my house, so my parents always took me to play. I was on and off with them for a while. Dated a guy from there and he cut his hair so I broke up with him and he went to play Magic the Gathering lol. Then I dated this girl but I really broke her heart bad. I think about it a lot. I also seen a guy from the league at my aunt and uncle’s church it was kinda awkward

That was also around when I got my first phone. It was a Motorola flip phone my grandpa had gotten for my birthday or Christmas. It had internet but using it cost minutes so I mostly used my pc still.

I’m writing this I am realizing there are a lot of parts to my story that seem important maybe but that I’d really rather not touch on and I’m not sure what to do about it.

When I got my first smartphone I was on Amino mostly. A guy who had gone to my school had starting coming to my parents church and he wanted to add me on virtual space. I don’t know what happened but I probably scared him off because I became super cringe after getting that dumb app. Amino wasn’t ALL bad, but there were many bad endings, and I probably would never go back in any serious way.

The internet has always been hard for me. I’m not sure what I should do with it at this point. I know I’m not gonna stop using it. I wish I could. I don’t wish I was born in the past or internet didn’t get made or that y2k would’ve happened. I just wish I knew what to do. That doesn’t only apply to the internet though. In real life, I don’t know what to do either. I spend hours saving pins to boards and listening to music and staring at pretty pictures of girls and nature wishing that I could be those girls dancing in meadows like those and I’m listening to Porter Robinson on my couch in my apartment. I’m looking at pictures of cool fake punk girls with perfect makeup and body and pictures of skateboards and sewers overgrown with plants with a filter and listening to My Chemical Romance and All these things are happening in my head so when I have to pick a new song I’m sucked back into the dull real world and there’s nothing I can do until the skip ad button comes on.

I wish I could just. Do. It.

I wish I could get it right

And I just wish

Maybe someday, I’ll wake up and realize wishing was worth it, that all my wishes came true and I don’t have to worry now

Until then

🌼

#rant post #vent post #personal

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sometimes-surveys · 1 year

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37.

[!!TRIGGER WARNINGS: EDs, s**cide, SA!!]

Was your childhood wasted by something? - Honestly, I really feel like it was. My oldest brother had a kid really young, and I was only nine, and it seemed that everything became about him and his "baby mama drama." My mom was constantly pissed off and took it out on me and my other brother, my dad was drinking at the time, and there wasn't anyone to talk to about it. I spent a lot of that time feeling neglected. Even when I got older, I was forced to babysit for free every summer and everyday after school when all of my friends got to have extracurricular activities and all that. It really sucked. I honestly think I'm making up for being a kid in my adulthood now. I love buying stuffed animals for myself, I love playing board games, and I love coloring. All of the things that I wanted to do as a child, but couldn't. It sounds so pathetic when you compare my childhood with someone else's who had it way worse, but I do feel like my childhood was stolen from me in this way.

Would you rather die during an adventure or die like a normal person? - Uh, I guess a normal person? This question is weird. I guess I pick that option because during an adventure would seem pretty sudden and out of nowhere and I wouldn't want to shock my family too much with that. Normal to me means dying of old age.

Have your parents ever put you on a diet? - Oh yes. My mom dieted all the time and she made me do it with her. She always commented on my weight. When she got weight loss surgery and lost all the weight she's always wanted to lose, the comments got worse and more frequent. It got so bad that I eventually just never ate at home for fear of her judgement, and the only time I would eat was at school. Then, once I hit high school, I eventually stopped eating at school and lived off of coffee and the occasional snack from the vending machine. Eventually, I started binging and purging, and eventually just purging everything I ate even if it wasn't a large quantity of food. I'm no longer doing that, but it's always in the back of my head, and I'm afraid it always will be.

Have your parents ever tried to commit suicide? - Not to my knowledge.

Do you have a gag reflex? - Only in the morning. Like when I'm brushing my teeth, and I go to brush my tongue, I'll gag.

Do you ever fantasize about trying drugs? - Not really, I've done all the drugs I've wanted to do.

Have you ever put gum in someone’s hair? - Ew, no.

Would you rather have sex before you’re married or wait till marriage? - I didn't wait until marriage.

Have you ever not gone to school, just because? - Towards the end, I skipped classes that I knew I didn't need to graduate...and one that I did, haha. Whatever, high school was just a blip in my timeline.

Do you know anyone who can play the bagpipes? - No, but that would be kind of awesome.

Have you ever let someone hit you? - I'm sure I have. Not like, in an abusive way. But like a "hit me as hard as you can" kind of dumb teenager way to prove I was one of the guys *eye roll* and I’ve been in physical fights before, so I didn’t let them hit me, but for certain I was hit.

Do you own a hand warmer? - No.

Do you have friends in other states/countries? - No.

Do you ever pay attention during church? - I don't go to church.

Have you ever broke a window? - No.

When was the last time you freaked someone out? - Haha, about a month or so ago. I was eating beets and acted like I hit my face on the treadmill (it was folded upright) and then spit out some in my hand. It looked like blood and my husband was like "omg what happened!" and seemed worried...though, he didn't get up off the couch so he wasn't too worried, I guess.

Have you ever gone on a date with a weirdo? - Before I made things official with my husband, I was dating another guy. He was pretty weird. He acted like he had never been around a woman before. Like, he asked me out by writing a note to me, which would have been cute if we were little teenagers in high school, but I was like, 21.

Who’s the last person you called a bitch? - Probably my husband, haha. We kid around a lot, don't worry.

Do you drink kool-aid? - Sure, I haven't had it in a while. I usually make it around summer for some reason.

Have you ever dropped something hot on your foot? - I'm sure I have, especially when I worked my kitchen jobs.

Do you watch porn? - Not really. The porn industry isn't one I want to support by watching.

Have you ever missed someone you hated? - I've missed someone before I figured somethings out and realized I should hate them. Does that make sense?

Is anyone in your family disabled? - Hmm, none that I can think of other than my Grandma, but she's just old and walks with a cane. It took us forever to convince her that she needed one. Old people are really stubborn.

What do you want for Christmas? - Cleaning gadgets, haha. I know, it's not exciting, but I've had my eye on this mop system, steam cleaner, and a few other things to help me keep house. I would rather be gifted it than buy it with my own money.

How many moles do you have? - A few here and there.

Do you make your bed everyday? - Yes. I love getting into a nicely made bed at the end of a long day. It takes just a few minutes and the reward is great for me.

Do you know how to ride a bike? - Yeah, but it's been a long time since I have. I keep telling myself that I'm going to fix up my husband's old bike that he was gifted and literally never rode. So it's in great condition, but it's been sitting, so I'm sure maybe things need to be oiled and the tires probably need inflating.

Do you own any comic books? - Yes.

What is the nastiest dare you have ever committed? - Just probably eating something weird. Like mustard and chocolate or some shit.

Do you know anyone who has been raped? - I knew someone who was, yes, but we're not friends anymore. And I was. Ick, it hurt to type that.

Are you an atheist? - No.

Have you ever owned a goldfish? - No.

Who was the last person to call you beautiful? - My husband.

How many times have you been stung by a bee? - Just once, I think,

What was the last flavor of gum you chewed? - Doublemint! I bought a pack of gum last week and chewed some for the first time since I was like, 17 or so, haha. Gum used to gross me out.

When was the last time you used tape? - Probably sometime last week while doing a makeup look.

When was the last time you said fuck? - Probably today at some point.

Have you ever stolen something? - Not on purpose. To make a long story short, that I'm sure I've told on here before: I was just a kid, wanted to show my mom something I find, put it in my coat pocket and went to go find her, forgot it was in my pocket, and realized I took it on accident the next morning when getting dressed.

What’s the last movie you watched? - 1922.

Who’s the last person you watched a movie with? - I watched 1922 with my mom yesterday while I was visiting my parents. She fell asleep, haha. It was kind of boring, but it was an okay movie. It's based off of a story from Stephen King, so now I want to read it.

Where were you yesterday at 5 PM? - I was at my parents' house.

Who would you like to kiss right now? - Nobody. My breath kind of stinks. I had a burrito bowl for dinner and it had onions in it.

When was the last time you had tic tacs? - Wow, it's been a while; I don't buy them. I like Ice Breakers spearmint mints.

When was the last time you ate chicken? - Five years ago, before I went vegetarian.

Who was the last person you told to ‘Shut the fuck up’ to? - Oof, I don't think I've ever said that to anyone. Not even when I'm really angry.

Why were you last nervous? - We went over to my mother-in-law's house last night for a visit and for my husband to dry his clothes (our dryer broke) and like always, they ended up talking about work. I got nervous because I'm not working right now and my husband and I have talked it over and I kind of want to just take the rest of the year off, too. I was nervous because I thought she was going to ask if I'm interviewing with families yet. The truth is, I'm not sure I want to work with kids anymore! I would’ve been totally clueless about what to say to her.

Whose pants did you last take off? - My own.

When was the last time you were disturbed? - Like interrupted in the middle of something? Or mentally? Mentally was like, Wednesday or so when my morbid curiosity got the best of me and I did a deep search of the actual crime photos of Jeffery Dahmer because my husband and I were watching the Netflix show everyone was talking about. Fucked up my sleep badly. When I closed my eyes, it's all I could see, so I spent most of the night watching cartoons and falling in and out of sleep. If you’re curious, don’t do it. That’s my warning to you.

Why did you last feel awkward? - I feel awkward all the time.

When was the last time you got in a fight with your best friend? - My best friend is my brother. I would say in 2017 is the last time we fought. I still have his death threat in a folder somewhere, just to state a case if I need to, haha. But we're on good terms and have been since we patched things up.

Have you ever asked someone for a tampon? - Yes.

Who was the last person you read a book to? - The little boy I nannied. That was always my favorite part of the day. He was so into books and listening to me read; mostly because I did all kinds of voices and sounds, haha.

Who is the person you say the most naughtiest things to? - My husband.

Who was the last person to send you a letter? - I haven't had a letter sent to me in so long. I guess that would be our old friend Alex. I wish we kept better contact with him and his wife. I had been friends with him for years, then he went in the Navy, now we don't really talk unless he's in town.

Do you like cupcakes or muffins more? - Cupcakes.

Have you ever pushed someone on purpose? - Yes.

Have you ever slapped someone in the face? - Yep.

#survey #surveys #tw

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