#I dont care enough to really look into it for various reasons but it also seems like itd be something id find entertaining | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

wrestlezon · 1 month

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I keep missing out on uno's mystery wrestling streams because every time it's running I'm coincidentally doing something else but perhaps I will make "a dedicated effort" for this next one since chuck is gonna be on commentary

#talkzon #I dont care enough to really look into it for various reasons but it also seems like itd be something id find entertaining

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holytrickster · 9 months

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sitting there like has my art gotten better over time or do I just add way too much unnecessary detail now

#but lineart becomes honestly really meditative for me at times especially if im adding texture to something #i will say at least i dont pick such ugly colors anymore. i used to always have reslly bright colors and then i thought it was too much #and overcorrected imo so everything was desaturated and boring #oh i also used to color in the lines for like every single color on the character? idk how to describe it but it was tedious #i like it on other people's art but i dont have the patience and i dont like how it looks when my lines are “cleaner”#sometimes i do miss how i used to not care if what i drew was “cringy”#but i think im coming back out of that considering all i draw is like. gay shit and elves and various iterations of myself and also my ocs #i should redraw some really really old art after what im working on maybe #i almost started working on a redraw of when i drew yavanna in likr 2017-18 but i dont like the design i gave her at all #minus the weird branch ears those were cool #mostly im just frustrated it still takes me hours to draw lol. i dont know why i get insecure about it or about art in general #i guess bc no one in my family really does so they have this idea im good at it #and i wanna grab them and shake them sometimes and explain all the reasons im actually not and all the mistakes i regularly make #i dont know if that makes any sense and i dont know why i struggle to just take the compliment #i guess because i know im not good enough at it for it to be a job? except thats not it either because ive almost always wanted to write #its very dumb and weird. especially considering i dont really draw for other people. i mean i like when people like my art but unless its #for somebody specific im not necessarily going to take it very hard at all if its not to their taste. i just do it because i enjoy it #and because there are things i only know how to express through writing or drawing. and when one doesnt work sometimes its the other #maybe i just get frustrated i cant be good at everything #its not realistic but i always end up wanting to do so many things and getting frustrated when i dont pick them up right away #because OF COURSE i dont #ok where was i going with this #its nearly 2am and my head is pounding again i dont even know what day this makes it. at least a week?#i dont know

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mihotose · 2 years

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purposefully depicting a very inaccurate portrayal of myu via gifset (ie by never actually making gifs of honpen) is something i take great glee in

#you Will look at the baseball collab again. whatever #but like i think its an interesting thing bc its Not a tv show or film. and discounting nibu which is a separate thing #i think it Would ruin the experience to have giffed every moment #its not a tv show that you can just click next episode for #and i think its only right to respect that it can take a long time To be able to watch every single one #so somebody who has watched eg atsukashiyama wont necessarily have seen bakuten #so i think you do have to be kinda careful about How Much is available bc its not like you can immediately just go watch like with a show #*tv show or movie #and that further not only are there plot elements within the various myu stories that i dont #want to be So open with for people who arent completely caught up but also for people who havent seen any #its a delicate balance and there Is a reason why im purposefully going out of my way not to gif honpen #and also bc i just think tv appearances are fun lool #also that i do just let my textposts with spoilers get buried like i dont want these in tags to stumble upon myu spoilers #like. im not even completely caught up #but i like that the textposts on here are vague enough that im not so spoiled #but on the other hand there still has to be some general sense of 'common knowledge' in order for discussions to take place #not that im really ever discussing anything im mostly just talking to myself #altho im aware that the more shows there are the harder it is to be completely caught up and the fewer spoilers there will be to be spoiled #im doing my best i think. recently i feel im less specifically talking about Events Of A Show and rather using examples from a show to #talk about character trait. which one are more vague and so less spoilery. but also due to my not having watched a main show in a while #gemitus

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fontainesiblingsbiggestfan · 2 months

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Lyney & Lynette with GN S/O's pet

notes: mod dont quite know what exactly to write about but thats fine cause can just make it up as mod goes on.. would post more but dont wanna overflow the tags with mods stuff and drown out other wonderful writers n whatnot! this is probably way worse than the last one so sorry if it sucks :( [btw rq reminder that u can request stuff, so look into that if you want something made for one of/both of these two.)

Lyney is pretty good with animals of all types pretty much!! Besides fish though, fish hate him (and no even in a scared way, they bite him.) As soon as he realizes you have a pet he instantly wants to befriend it, asks you what they're like, do they like to eat this or that..

Probably gonna have to tell him to not give your pet too many treats, cause he might overdo it a tiny bit while trying to make him their favorite. Would probably start bringing a treat for everytime he went to your house then explains it as him having to pay an "entrance fee". If your pet is able to/likes to play he might bring them a toy like.. Every two or so weeks? Whenever he sees a cute toy for their species he'll just get one for your pet.

If it's a dog, he doesn't have much experience with them due to various reasons, but he doesn't dislike them or anything (even if he does prefer kitties..) You might not want a big one on his lap or anything though since he's not neccesarily the biggest guy, so be careful with that.

Asks you if it sheds before he even enters the house. He needs to know cause nine times out of ten he just finished a show and he does not want pet hair all over his show clothes. If it is then he'll probably end up going home to change to avoid any issues regarding that.

Cats love Lyney 99% of the time, can tame even the craziest of crazies into lapcats. Of course, this is 99%, not 100.. The 1% wants him dead. Birds also tend to like him since he's used to working with doves and whatnot, used to dealing with them. Asks you if he can have it on his finger/arm. Also good with rabbits due to him also working with them, might scare it like once with a magic trick though since he might forget yours isn't really used to that.?? Feels bad afterwards though and gives it food as an apology so I suppose it's alright.

Lyney is willing to petsit and is good at it. If your pet destroys anything you own while your gone he might just.. Replace it and hope you don't notice. Would be a bit scared that you might get angry at him also for letting it do that or something. In general would describe him as a pretty solid person to keep around your pet with points deducted due to the issue of him spoiling the thing too much, 8/10.

Lynette is liked by cats, and they tend to gravitate towards her. So, if you have a cat, hurray! If you have a dog, however...

Dogs don't really like her, with the range going from them barking at her constantly to just ignoring her, depending entirely on the dog's personality. Don't worry, though; it won't really offend her. She's quite used to it, and besides, she isn't a dog fan anyway. She would probably ask you to put the dog up if it won't leave her alone, though.

A lot like Lyney, she is also good with birds and rabbits. But do keep in mind, just because she's good with them, doesn't mean they're good with her. Birds, unless having been subject to Lynette for long enough, tend to fly away from her. Not all of them, just most of them.

Rodents and the like also run from her. And amphibians. And fish. Her cat-like features and smell seem to frighten any animals that would qualify as prey to a cat. But again, she doesn't really mind; she expected this sort of reaction anyway.

She doesn't try to make them like her or anything, wouldn't even mind if they hated her. Still, that doesn't mean she would turn the animal down if it does happen to enjoy her presence; she'd not-so-secretly like it if they did. Lynette might even come to your house just to chill out with the pet (you being a small side bonus to the trip).

Pretty good petsitter, kind of. Lynette has her own cats at home, so she's used to being climbed all over or serving food and whatnot. As long as the animal isn't scared of her, it will go fine. Just pray to God you have no machines that she'd have to use in her time there, and she'll be fine, 8/10 (points deducted for obvious reasons).

#lynette x reader #lyney x reader #genshin lynette #genshin lyney #lyney #lynette #genshin x reader #genshin impact

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nerves-nebula · 1 year

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oo I was wondering if maybe the brothers in your AU would have different levels of food anxiety? Honestly I was thinking mostly Raph, considering he's the oldest, largest (at least body weight wise it seems?) and probably expends the most energy taking care of his brothers and doing most of the chores when he was younger.

Probably especially bad that Leo could bully food from any one else and get away with it, and sounds like he might've picked on Raph most in that regard, or if Leo took Donnie or Mikey's food Raph was more willing to split or even give his portions away.

That's assuming Splinter even fed them, which considering the "timeout corner" they might have had to forage for food more than once.

Because like I was thinking about the dynamic between Raph and Casey and how Raph's food anxiety could be what helped drive him to make sure Casey had at least some food (he knows how much it sucks and doesn't want someone else to be stuck like that) and how Casey could have a big impact on Raph if he helped Raph to have a more stable source of food/ate enough.

<- also kinda related thoughts. Raph might be smaller in your version because he didn't get all the nutrition he needed growing up so his height/size is stunted? Also maybe why Leo is the tallest (favourite child privileges?). Hunger might have also helped drive Raph to try running away?

<- I could definitely see Mikey and/or Donnie having food anxiety too, with either food hoarding or getting aggressive when they think someone will steal their food? Or fast eating.

<- Basically I am ROTATING THEM IN MY HEAD!!

OHHHH this is an ask i have so much personal investment in because here’s a Not Super Secret fact about me, I’ve got Avoidant restrictive food intake disorder! And (partially because of that) I starved a lot as a kid! BASICALLY me and all my siblings have weird relationships to food so I am FULLY committed to making these guys relationships with food weird as well.

Splinter DOES feed them, in that there is FOOD in the HOUSE which is EDIBLE. He doesn’t really cook for them, though. Raph’s been cooking for them since he was old enough to take on that job, though he mostly made easy stuff at first like sandwiches/soup/noodles/uncooked vegetables.

So lets go through each turtle and look at how things turned out, why dont we?

Leo: Leo has the least food issues of them all. To him, it’s more like a status thing. If he wants something, he’ll take it. It doesn’t matter if there’s only enough soup for them to each have one bowl, he’ll have two if he feels like it. He does it because he knows he can get away with it, and because it’s been normalized. It doesn’t feel like a huge issue/violation to him.

Mikey: Mikey binges/eats food as fast as possible. He doesn’t wanna give anyone the chance to take it from him. He’s the least discerning and will eat stuff even if it’s kind of rotten/stale. He doesn’t have the self restraint to hoard food, he’d just eat it all immediately. Mikey gets reasonably aggressive about his food, but wouldn’t actually hurt his brothers (except maybe Leo) to get it back. then again his brothers (except leo) typically wouldn't take it from him anyway.

Donnie: Donnie has a ton of texture issues and because of that he’s a picky eater, he’s starved the most second only to Raph, because even when there IS food he can’t always get himself to eat it. he’s more used to the pain of starvation than the disgust of eating something with a Bad Texture

(shoutout to MYSELF. I was really out here dying as a 12 year old, huh? Fully eating 1 sandwich a day and crying about it cause the bread felt gross and dry in my mouth.)

Donnie is prone to hoarding food, but keeps it hidden in various places because if Leo thought Donnie had more food than him, he’d try to steal it. So Donnie keeps his stashes secret, but will share food if he thinks the others REALLY need it. Because Donnie can only eat specific kinds of food, he’s very aggressive about protecting his food from others. But he can’t beat Leo in a fight, so he usually resorts to hiding the food.

Donnie has slight cannibalistic urges because of all that (and cause he’s a softshell lol), but it’s not a huge issue and he’d never act on them cause the idea/texture of eating another PERSON is repulsive. He’ll often just chew on something (even himself) to tide himself over.

Raph: poor, beautiful Raph. Raphael, my darling boy. SO FIRST OF ALL Raph starved the most. If Leo took more than his fair share, Raph would split his portion for his little brothers, because to him taking care of them is his whole reason for being alive.

he has cannibalistic urges too, cause he starves the most (and cause he's a snapping turtle). and that makes him feel like a terrible person. Donnie and Mikey get these urges too, but they never starved quite as bad as Raph did because he’d always split his food with them.

I like the idea that Raph is stunted because of nutritional issues, so yknow what? I'm adopting that. it's canon now.

as for Raph and Casey,,, I think they would definitely share food. In fact, I think Raph would leave Casey food/snacks as gifts when he was trying to befriend him. Casey eventually bringing along food from above ground would be a GAME CHANGER for the turtles, too.

one correction: Donnie is actually the tallest! He just slouches a lot (and I've mostly drawn them as kids, before his growth spurt)

Man, sidenote, but writing this really got me thinking about my childhood more. If we didn't get enough to eat, mom would get mad at us like “why didn’t you eat??” IDK I’m 11 and you’ve been gone all day!! She’d check in with the older kids and ask them (and eventually me, cause at a certain point I was the oldest one home) if the other kids had eaten. And sometimes i’d say i did just to get her off my back. God what a shithole. Anyway, this was a fun ask hah.

#nnstuff #ask #tmnt #disordered eating #food tw #tmnt au #teenage mutant neglected turtles #child neglect tw #child abuse tw #long post

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noodleblade · 7 months

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Your soundstar post is so good, how do you think they got together? And did that decrease the murder attempts on megatron's life?

;-----; thank you <333333333 i love them so much and dont talk about them nearly enough.

Honestly, for me, I see their coming together really slow and gradual. Their relationship professionally is marred with complex distrust/trust for each other. They hate each other but also know they need each other in order for the Decepticons to get anything done. Soundwave is far too competent and instrumental to the actual function of the Cause for him to be displaced and Starscream, while vile and wicked, is second in command for a reason. He has leadership qualities and is competent in his various fields that it would be a major blow to the Decepticons to lose him as well. They both know this and understand this but there is still distrust between them.

I think loyalty/trust is something that builds over time. Its slow, its very background because so much other stuff is going on all the time they don't even realize they are giving each other that trust. I don't think it would be a One Moment Changes Everything type beat. Its a collection of them that add to their growth.

I think affection is something that takes even longer. Vulnerability is something they both have....difficulty with. If we are looking at TFP, Soundwave is incredibly guarded to the point of appearing almost mechanical while Starscream is volatile and hostile, he is also rarely open. Again, I'd picture it being a cluster of little instances of dropping their guard for a moment and these moments just...collect:

Starscream catching Soundwave working night shifts on the bridge alone, listening to music. Soundwave watching Starscream sneaking out to stretch his wings. Working together without a single argument and realizing, huh, this works pretty well? Success in doing something together and sees what happiness/pride/success look like on the other.

In TFP, there is a sense of sadness in both of them which I think allows for quite a bit of vulnerable moments. I could (and maybe one day will) write hundreds of these little, inconsequential moments.

For me, their relationship isn't so much as romantic as it is intimate. I, personally, don't picture them very lovey dovey, holding hands and going on dates and what not, but I do obsess over the quiet intimacy of sharing a space and allowing for them to drop their masks. Starscream doesn't have to posture and dramatizes his every action and Soundwave can loosen up and relax. Gently caring for each other in ways they neglect themselves. I could go on but god this is already much longer than I expected.

And yes, the murder attempts probably still continue. Maybe lessen, but Starscream's issues with Megatron are not solved by being in any sort of relationship with Soundwave. I think the beauty of their relationship is they still piss each other off at work. Starscream still demands bold action and approach in fighting the Autobots and Soundwave still prefers a defensive, subdued measures. They poke holes in each other's plans and ultimately, it makes them better in the end. I think depending on the continuity you choose, there is room to explore how Megatron effects their relationship, but I like to think they keep it very separate from what they are doing work-wise. There is potential for conflict there as well that would also be interesting to explore.

#anon you have blessed me with being able to ramble about these two while on hold thank you thank you #soundstar #asks #anonymous #i should have prefaced this is viewed from a tfp lens for the most part

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dekarios · 2 months

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i love cryptid-like ocs... they are something. not telling u what or what their name is. but they exist, probably.

ive never actually talked about this oc on tumblr cuz i got the distinct feeling tumblr either wouldnt like it or wouldnt care (this is also why i dont talk about a lot of ocs very often and its usually just afhiri... low self esteeeeeeeem)

but i'll use this pose to give a lil rundown. trigger warning i guess for a generally terribly unhealthy and toxic relationship dynamic with weird shit like cannibalism and blah blah

this oc was specifically created because i wanted to explore orin's character more. i wasn't satisified with what she got, and i also am not really a dark urge fan/player so i don't have a durge to explore with orin (and i don't think i could do this now because i've fallen in love with a particular default durge interpretation i see on twitter a lot)

i wanted to make a werewolf in general cuz they're my favourites. cirok IS a werewolf but it's... not a typical werewolf and genuinely so fucked up. and i really liked the idea of a changeling with a werewolf, so i gave orin my more Typical werewolf

when orin is a young teen she finds a werewolf who is about the same age as her. orin decides she wants it, like a pet, and is able to convince the cultists who actually looked after her/raised her to essentially keep it as a pet and care for it... 'care' for it

they are raised together with the werewolf being orin's constant companion in every sense of the word. orin demands they are together whenever she can. they have a very close bond, which isn't quite owner and pet, but it skirts that line a lot.

orin trains the werewolf to be a cannibal and only eat people, this is partly for control reasons and also because it's fun to orin. the werewolf is specifically ordered not to hunt animals, and is punished when it does. so whenever the werewolf does hunt, it hunts the streets of baldur's gate for people to eat. it ends up developing favourites :)

orin also trains it to be tough and loyal in other ways. like orin practicing her blade work on it, which not only strengthens its skin with scar tissue, but also improves its pain tolerance, and tests how far she can go before it will act out. as they reach adulthood, it never tries to stop her - meaning she could kill it whenever she wants, and it wouldn't defend itself

going back to the cannibalism, the werewolf, in all of its love and devotion to orin, has determined she must be the most tasty meat of all. she's a changeling, the only it's ever seen, so it simply assumes she must taste unlike anything it's ever had. and because it loves her so, her scent alone is enough to drive it to a desire to devour her. orin uses this to toy with the werewolf, and will allow it to lick her, taste her blood, and various other things like placing her hand in its mouth to tease it. it would never bite orin without being ordered to, and sometimes she does allow it. when she's feeling particularly mean, she will taunt it about how much it wants to eat her, to see if she can break its resolve.

orin has also taken to drinking the werewolves blood, thinking it has forged a bond between them that transcends everything - they are connected through flesh and blood and it can never be severed.

the werewolf worships orin in a way that she could never get anywhere else. she has created the perfect creature for her, something that will always listen to her and respect her, that'll do anything she says, that will love her always no matter what she does, that will always provide whatever she may desire. if orin ordered it to die, it would. if orin ordered to eat itself, it would.

one of my favourite facts is that orin doesn't want it to ever leave the werewolf form. while this is technically impossible, and she will be visible angry and disappointed and upset if she witnesses the werewolf in it's usual form, she's found she enjoys a half transformed state a lot. so the werewolf has taken to forcing itself to be half werewolf, and half whatever it is when it isn't a werewolf. this form can and will look different! it's hard to keep up and is painful for the werewolf.

on that note, no. i don't know what the werewolf is when it isn't in its werewolf form. its race/species doesn't matter. i will never decide on this i don't even wanna think about it. Unimportant Information!

also because it is a dnd werewolf, it can be in Just A Wolf Form. sometimes it does this on its own accord and for orin. she doesn't mind it but prefers either full werewolf or the half transformed state. however sometimes u just wanna pet a wolf yknow. yknow???

ok i think thats enough LKSDFSFSDKFLDS

#fray.txt #ask #Anonymous #oc werewolf #i might as WELL tag this

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youngmastereraqus · 1 year

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HYPSTER magazine vol 3 Q&A translation, part 1

Originally posted on my twitter DISCLAIMER: My japanese is weak, i usually do this for myself, and i am not a professional. please do not post/share elsewhere.

Question: How are you spending New Year's Eve?

BUSTER BROS

ICHIRO: On New Year’s Eve, i go to the shopping district with my brothers and pick out their favorite foods. Then, we put them in a stacked bento box (jubako) and make it into the yamada family’s special new years dinner! (osechi). It’s a lot of fun

JIRO: i’m going to visit the shrine with my siblings! There’s a lot to ask for, like prosperity (for business) and good health… fulfilment ? You can ask for all sorts of things. My friends also invited me, so i’ll be making a lot of new years visits!

SABURO: it's just a regular day. I play board games with my brothers on new year’s.

MAD TRIGGER CREW

SAMATOKI: the yakuza (gokudo) have a lot to do. ah? … its just various things. Nothing’s gonna gwt done if we leave it to the younger guys

JYUTO: Working. For some reason, there are a lot of occurrences during the year end holidays. So i’ve been pretty busy these last few years.

RIO: New Year’s Eve…? For us military, it’s just one day of the year. As usual, we just train and prepare for the battle

FLING POSSE

RAMUDA: I’m participating in some kind of countdown event ☆ one of these days, i’d love to celebrate with a huge fireworks display with all of shibuya!

GENTARO: during new years eve, we are all running towards one thing. The first to reach their destination will be the luckiest person of the year. It is truly a battle for men’s prestige. Well actually, that’s a lie

DICE: Its fortune telling! Pick up a nice looking stick and break it in half. If it snaps cleanly, it’s good luck! Easy, right? A gambler has to take good care of his money!

MATENRO

JAKURAI: I’m on duty at the hospital where i work. I want people with families to be able to take time off, so i try to take the initiative when there are holidays or events.

HIFUMI: I’m participating at the countdown event at the club!~ The interior has flashy decorations, we’re gonna pop open a bunch of champagne and welcome the new year with our customers!

DOPPO: extravagantly!! I spend my time at home watching TV while eating soba! I also try to fall asleep, take a nap, or even just coast along the day. It’s pure bliss…!!!

DOTSU HOMPO

SASARA: i’ll be preparing myself for my special on new years day, so i wont have much time to relax. You should see me making people laugh on various tv shows!

ROSHO: I don’t really do anything special… i just go to the tenmangu shrine on new year’s day to pay my respects. I spend most of my afternoon in bed

REI: New years is the perfect time to drink. i’ll find a suitable house, slip into a family gathering, and have a lot of fun together

BAD ASS TEMPLE

KUKO: dont talk about the new years holiday!! Just thinking about it makes me sick… it’s so fucking cold and i still have to ring the bell! there are so many customers, it’s just too much

JYUSHI: I’m intrigued by the festivities of the musicians in the castle square. the day i stand side by side with them and change the world with our beauty is on the horizon…!!

HITOYA: touring. Just wandering around aimlessly is fun enough for me. Also, I don’t eat rice cakes. I don’t like mochi, either

#hypnosis mic #hypmic #hypnosis microphone #buster bros #mad trigger crew #matenro #fling posse #yubin translates

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dyketubbo · 1 year

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Transfem CWilbur hcs. Now.

why anon i am so glad you would honor me with this request

i think that cwilbur would probably keep her name because she looked up like name meanings and shit and was like hoooolllyyy shit my name is cool as fuck actually. i do also like the idea of her having a name based off of one of wilburs songs though. i admittedly misremembered vienna as sienna but i think both are cute so either of those also work as names for her

cwilbur to me is very like. obviously she knows about trans people her son is trans (i also like to see cclingy as trans but ctommy would have not transitioned yet and ctubbo just doesnt think to tell anyone if they dont think its necessary) and shes very proud of him! but shes also like. well at least fundy enjoys being a man because i sure dont this is miserable and everyone within a 5 mile radius immediately raises an eyebrow. i think being in pogtopia fucked her up about it because she started seeing people as being Afraid of her and for a reason she couldnt place being a Big Scary Crazy Man hurt in more ways than one but she was spiralling too hard to really analyze those feelings

and then in limbo all she Has is her own thoughts. and she comes back and shes manic and she considers telling everyone but but but but. tommy is looking at her with a shocked expression and tubbo isnt even talking and the new kid is trying to shield tubbo from her and suddenly all the feelings from pogtopia start rushing back and shes like oh. not enough to stop the mania but enough to sting hard enough, like a pin that she puts in the thought itself for another time

i thought the utah reveal was very funny. i also wish wilbur got to talk to more people, and i think that itd be interesting for him to talk to ghostboo whos like god i was SO scared for people to know this "real me", the me that everyone would be scared of, but now that i dont care about any of that anymore im free!! and wilbur would also talk to like. idk various others including more genuine convos with eret and with all of it eventually shes able to get to a calm resolution of. i need to be somewhere else when things are good enough that i can leave

and cdream dies (<-fully talking in terms of my rewrite now) and wilbur makes sure tommy is okay and everything and Then something similar to the utah reveal but like. slightly less mentally ill happens. wilbur is still sorta vague and tommy gets panicked and pissed thinking wilburs about to commit suicide again and wilburs like oh god no i just. i need to be somewhere else to change without everyones eyes on me. i dont like this me i think theres something deep inside me thats broken and im trying to repair it but i cant repair it if im This me. and tommy talks about how its all just One wilbur, just going through changes like everyone else but tommy and the people who matter love wilbur, no matter what kind of wilbur hes being, because hes still himself and thats the person they love, no general or president or ghost from the past, just wilbur. whoever he wants that person to be yada yada

and it sort of Clicks for wilbur in a sense. oh, this is all just one me, and im in charge. and people stick by me because im me no matter how much i change. and i think i know what changes i need to make (around this point is like. i think this would trigger the acceptance of ghostbur in a sense. i have complicated feelings about the ghosts but just know he and wilbur would truly be the same person through and through now). but i still need to go away for a bit. just a little. and tommy trusts her and she leaves for a bit and takes hrt and takes a while just to know that she likes the changes and when she does know she likes the changes she decides ok. this is who i want to be. this is Me. and comes back eventually to heal with everyone else too

misc hcs: i think she would actually prefer relying on hrt and breast forms to full top surgery. also dont think hed care about bottom surgery. she would still like her big coats and sweaters but she'd also wear skirts more often. maybe not dresses though unless its a formal event. also think she would grow out her hair a bit but not that much. in general like.. she doesnt change That much. shes still wilbur soot. but shes happier now and she looks more comfortable, like this is the self that she wants to be. i think she would feel like whatever broke inside her was slowly being patched back together

(and eventually, she realizes there was never anything broken about her in the first place. and she sits on a balcony and she still gets an intrusive thought about jumping but she knows she doesnt want to, not anymore. shes alive, and shes herself, and shes making the most of it.)

#angel answers #wilbur #dsmp #transfem c!wilbur #ig i may as well make a lil tag for her huh #vienna soot #<-just for tagging purposes if i talk about her in the future #jubilee is also a cute one but that would be very mentally ill to get her name from the song directly about suicide #even if itd be interesting as a 'death of the old self' type metaphor #but i think wilburs story works best as an acceptance of the self. no more suicide. no more death. just learning how to enjoy life again.#or maybe even for the first time

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transgendz · 2 months

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I got an ask this morning that I've taken some time to consider. I will not be replying directly to it, because its an anon, and someone claiming to be a mutual for years so if they wanna talk they can dm me, but this can be a more full breakdown than an ask can reasonably get.

I've posted proof of the cost of my roommates last ($500) appointment within the past two weeks. If anyone wants to dm me for more proof, I really don't mind.

Those who have been following me for years probably remember why I don't feel safe sharing much info outside of dms at all. It's stalking and abuse, but if anyone needs more details, I dont mind answering that either.

We have been in various stages of getting out of homelessness and seeking treatment for disability for a while now. Fought for my roommate's legal documents for years. A lot of this stuff has been going on for years before we ever asked for help online or otherwise. We got evicted as soon as the rent moratorium ended, and not long after, we got covid that almost killed us. That left me permanently more disabled and left my roommate with a brand new disability on top of the existing ones. For a point of reference, even before the pandemic, I was his full-time caregiver. I still am.

On that note, he spent most of this time last year in and out of the hospital. I am still his full-time caregiver. He still has thousands in unpaid hospital bills. Again, dm me, I do not mind providing proof of all of this. I have his medical records and permission to share them if I remove the super sensitive info such as social security number.

My posts are generally phrased similarly or the same because if I think I phrased it correctly the first time, I will phrase it that way again. I am autistic, and people who talk to me enough to get to know me know I speak on scripts, and I am very repetitive. The people in my life irl remark on it. I don't really know what else to say, except I'm far from the only person on here who does that. I'm not even the only person who does that for the same reasons. I update my posts when I get a notification, and I check my email frequently most days. I do not thank every person who helps us, and I'm sorry. I try, and will keep trying.

Food is our biggest cost due to me and my roommate both having life threatening allergies to dairy, soy, and gluten. I don't know if you can understand how expensive that is until you live it. We are trying to reduce costs though. We have a garden, are expanding to that daily, as well as a greenhouse that was already here when we moved in which we have filled. And fruit trees and berry bushes.

And pretty importantly, all of the supplies have been given/loaned to us by a family member. A lot of the plants were previously planted and came out of dormancy in the last few weeks because it's currently spring. If half of what we have planted now does well, we will be fine on food. If anyone wants proof of all that, I would actually be overjoyed to share about our progress in that. I am really proud of our plants.

I have been looking for a job, I've mentioned that in posts before, but I am still applying. I am a full-time caretaker of a disabled person while also being disabled. I am limited to online work. If anyone has anything I can apply for oh my god I would appreciate it. I will be doing yard sales now that its warmer to help unclutter that previously mentioned family member's house of antiques and collectibles, and I'll get money from that. I do commissions at my art blog @theartistrans I have been doing gig shit and trading labor for goods and dogsitting. I don't have a regular 9-5, but I work.

And I do have a second roommate. She just largely takes care of her own for now, although that's been on and off some in the past as major things happened in her life.

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achillessulks · 5 months

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i'm a nosy mfer... i want to know: whats your actual nationality? if u cant say for privacy reasons i accept a region (if u dont want to say to be mysterious thats also fair) 2. how do u know so many languages? thats all.

Nosy, but clearly not dedicated... >.>

I've been rather embarrassingly obvious about where I'm from, both on this blog (which I don't use very much any more) and on my Goodreads account (which I use more frequently). I am not, actually, going to tell you all that information—what would be the fun in that? (please don't actually dox me though)—but, if I remember correctly, you should be able to determine, by a careful reading, not only my country of origin but also the region and even city in which I was born. Where I'm currently living is a bit more closely guarded, for good reason (none of your business), but I've made no secret that it's a Western democracy. Which one? That is off-limits, for privacy reasons. (But also I have no connection to this specific country in particular, so it shouldn't matter.)

Anyway, to the second part of your question: I was very lucky to spend an impressionable part of my childhood in an environment where multiple languages were spoken within the household, and I regularly encountered people of various backgrounds and ethnicities as a child. I was encouraged to learn communication; I started reading independently when I was two. Apart from growing up bilingual, I also studied linguistics pretty extensively as a teenager and young adult.

The "secret" (I guess) is that I'm really only functionally bilingual. I know a lot of pieces of a lot of different languages, which makes me look more impressive than I really am—the difference between most polyglots you'll see online and people like me (i.e., kids who grew up in blended households) is that internet polyglots pretend that having a conversational grasp of a language equals fluency, which it... does not, at all—but yeah, I studied a lot, not just linguistics but also specific languages, and spent a lot of time around people who only spoke languages I didn't know, and didn't know any languages I spoke. How do you communicate in that situation? Well, somebody's gotta learn something. And I like to impress people, so.

Also, and I really can't stress this enough: I studied translation. Translation studies as a field will help more than almost anything in understanding how a language is composed, constructed, and utilised; it will help you quickly pick up on when a translation doesn't fit the original; it will give you a good critical eye for not only what someone is saying but also how they are saying it. It is not an exaggeration to say that my experience in translation studies did more for my ability of rapid language acquisition than anything else except for, probably, the total immersion I got when I went to Belgium and was accosted by German-speaking tourists who thought I was Belgian but they didn't know any language other than German, for example. There are other examples—total immersion, like a baby when it's first learning how to Do Language Properly, is the absolute best way to learn basically anything—but the point stands.

Also also, I read a lot of poetry.

#I am always happy to answer questions about languages/translation/etc. but you will probably have more luck asking on GR honestly.#I'm not on this website very much any more. for many reasons (:#talking about books and stuff #anonymous #asks

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eventually--darling · 2 years

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How do you make gifs? Care to share your process? o3o

oooh yes i can!!! i tried not to get too detailed with it since im interpreting this as just asking for my process rather than an actual tutorial sudhf.

the general tools i use are photoshop (i pay $10 a month T_T), vlc media player, and one of my various video downloading sites. i don't torrent or anything bc that scares me and i dont understand it. plus, since i almost exclusively gif kdramas the video uploads are generally in pretty decent quality and dont get scrubbed from the web the way western shows do.

so once i have the video downloaded i open it with vlc media player. I use a really inefficient method to extract frames but it works well enough that i don't really care to change it. plus i cant really figure out another way? they say that certain video programs can capture frames for you but none of the ones ive tried seem to have that feature. there's also supposedly another method to do it in vlc media player but it's never worked for me. anyway.

so to extract frames in vlc i find the moment i want to capture and then use the "e" hotkey to skip to the next frame and click the little screenshot button to capture it.

i do this over and over at lightning speed until I get all the frames i want. yes this does often lead to accidentally skipping frames (which can make the gif a little choppy) so sometimes i redo it, but sometimes i don't bother.

after i've captured the frames, i copy them from my pictures folder (not entirely sure why they end up there but im not going to mess with the pathway) to a specific folder ive created for that gif or gifset.

then I'll go through and make sure there are no duplicate or missing frames. after that, i edit them down to about 70 frames per gif, then select them all and rename them so that they're in numbered order (photoshop loads them out of order if i don't).

I do 70 frames mostly bc my sharpening action on photoshop doesnt go past 70 frames and i haven't bothered to fix it lol. also it's comfortable length for a gif so there's not much reason to. you can usually get away with about 40-50 frames tho before it feels too short.

ok nowww i open photoshop and things get good.

first thing i do is load the files into a stack.

i have a bunch of settings in place to make life easier so i already have my sharpening action created (which sharpens all the frames for me rather than having to do it manually. gift from God), and my timeline visible. so now i just play my sharpening action

then load the frames into an animation and reverse them so they dont play backwards.

then i set the frame delay to 0.05 seconds. it's interesting bc gifs played at normal speed look kinda weird. so having it slowed down a little is ideal. not too much though or it looks choppy.

now i crop the gif. i dont have to do this here but generally i do. just helps me focus without the distraction of the tv bars on the top and bottom and just. All the other stuff going on in the background.

nowwww i color. usually start with a color adjustment curve layer. when you use the little eyedrop tool this can really deepen the image and bring it to life. you dont realize how dull tv looks until you gif lol.

that gives me the base tones i want and deepens the image.

sometimes i brighten the gif with the curves layer, but in this case adding a separate brightening layer worked better.

then i'll export the gif with tumblr dimensions and upload it into a draft.

if it is still too dark or the colors look off, i'll just mess more with the layers. in this case, i only needed the two, but a lot of gifs will need a few different adjustment layers like vibrance or selective color to look right.

And that's kinda it!

colored:

uncolored:

hopefully it makes sense lol. Like I said, im not thinking of this as a tutorial or anything but i still want ppl to know what im talking about uhsfusd

#asks #sorry this took a minute #ty for the ask!!#giffing chatter

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dragonbleps · 1 year

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When i sit down you can see a glimpse of my blue skyrim socks between my boots and my pants, but i dont think anyone at the party will look or care ljksdhfg

I was getting super nervous for various reasons: won't really know anyone there aside from my mom; won't know what to talk about or do; mom will probably drink; etc etc

People there are mostly going to be older and conservative, which I didn't think about when I chose a men's outfit to wear lkjhsdfg But my mom said she'll cover for me by saying that it's the "men's half" of our costumes, not that I need the excuse but it's nice to know she'll defend me.

Also one of her coworkers has already been nosy and asking my mom why i wouldn't wanna wear a dress, and if i have a boyfriend, and if i want kids in the future (because somehow a cis woman wanting to wear a men's suit for one night would prevent all that???) and mom did her best not to invite more questions, answering succinctly and then moving the conversation away

Mom made it clear she'd defend my choice, although she wasn't going to try to explain "the other thing" (that I'm asexual) and i was like lmao don't worry about it, they don't need to know. they dont need to know if i'm het, have a boyfriend, want to get married, or have kids. it's not why im going to the party and it's not their business

We also agreed that if someone asks what I do as a job (because "I don't" is apparently a Taboo answer) we're going to say "Freelance Artist" because obviously art is something I can talk about if they happen to ask and we won't have to come up with more lies jlkhsdfg

anyway

i've got my earrings in and im debating putting on the glue-on nails my mom got me, or even painting them to match my outfit better. i've cut some gel insoles to put in my boots (they're old and uncomfy but they fit the occasion best and look good). i've eaten lunch and we'll see if a bagel is enough to hold me over until the food is served at the party.

im kind of calming down now just taking it a bit at a time, yknow.

#missy rambles

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supportanimy · 22 hours

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random shadow the hedgehog (2005) related thoughts that i've had for a while and really want to put somewhere:

maria is beloved by a lot of people yet the only people shadow ever seemed to care about from the ark was her and gerald. the reasoning is probably that other people on the ark avoided shadow and that makes me kinda sad

do you think shadow has met up with any other ark survivors besides the commander? im especially thinking of the researchers he saved in the doom's hero mission, if that mission is actually canon. i like to think that it is

speaking of the doom, y'all should look up the ending of that level in the expert mode. why dont i see people talking about it

also more people should go take a listen to the expert mode dialogue. its so gold listening to everyone talking to shadow. actual japan exists in sonic's world according to one of the dialogue

i read the names of every route possible and i find it hilarious how most of the ones for the true neutral hero ending with omega is called something like "android empire". though the ending also has routes titled "machine boys" and "steel combat boots" and i like those a lot too

y'all should also read the titles of the routes. though its much funnier with the context of each mission and ending within a route, which i have. because i think about this game a lot.

also i dont think there are enough aus based of the various endings. i especially really want more "robot kingdom" shit cuz i love robots

finally go look at this for no reason

youtube

actually no, one more thing, the person who made that made shadow the hedgehog reloaded, which is what i played, and they mention putting a little surprise in expert mode, that's just like really wonderful and yall should actually just go play that now

#shadow the hedgehog #shth 2005 #Youtube

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cow-legs · 2 months

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Of course it does feel a little silly to make big update posts about how im burned out and am trying to take a break from drawing right in the middle of a time where im uploading new art more relatively consistently than i have in a very long time it feels like but i guess it was still important to make the distinction, between things that i enjoy drawing and can keep doing vs things i dont enjoy doing at all and need to stop immediately, just for my own sake.

Openly telling people "yuuup i'm not going to be drawing anything other than super basic shit from now on for a long time" means that whenever i think of drawing anything post-worthy i know i will feel silly for posting it after saying that, and from there if i still decide to go through with it anyway it was probably something i actually wanted to draw and enjoyed doing while if this thought made me self conscious enough to not go through with it then it was probably something i wanted to draw only due to impulsive obligation rather than something i wanted to spend time making just for the fun of doing it so the spell gets broken. So its a functional enough system, i guess.

&now that this distinction has been made in my brain i can spend more time doing shit i actually enjoy instead of letting it get beaten out by the things i "should" be working on every time

Putting my foot down and going "no, i am not going to keep forcing myself to do detailed clean lineart on even more detailed sketches when i get much more enjoyment out of just doing really rough and simple shit instead" after i have found myself independently coming to realizations about what kinds of art just suck the life out of me over and over again and then just disregarding these realizations every single time to go back to the shit that kills me because "well this is how you normally do it" or "this technically looks nicer, in some aspects" and finally just fucking forcing myself to stop doing that is probably overall more helpful to my mental health than just forcing myself to stop drawing altogether when thats a drastic move that may or may not be the actual solution. Now i am finding and re-learning ways to create things that don't make me feel like i am a walking corpse so i think i will take the feeling of thinking i look a little silly for seemingly disregarding my big life updates over never having found these things out for myself at all any day.

I don't really know why i feel like making update posts in the first place when to be honest i dont think it really matters, people arent paying me for any of this and i stopped feeling "sorry" for "not posting enough" or such things as that a long time ago so it's not like i feel any kind of legitimate need to tell people about what my status is creative-wise. But i guess a large part of it is just that i like talking and have a lot of things to say but for various personal reasons have no desire to post 99% of these thoughts publicly so it's the like rare chance i get to actually start saying shit on any of my art accounts that is actually relevant to the subject at hand without crossing my own boundaries and saying more than i am comfortable with

It is a little weird feeling writing update posts though because i dont really know how to word them in any way that doesnt come off as a fanfic authors note going "sorry its been a whole 20 minutes since the last update i got mugged and all my money was stolen and he broke my leg also but im trying my best to write more despite this" like girl focus on the mugging not this shit. When in reality i actually dont care very much about providing Content as much as the hypothetical fanfic author i just felt the need to say something because why not and didnt know how to word it in a way that makes me not come off like that. which is how you get this i guess. anyway i already forgot what the point of this post was i guess i just wanted to say some shit. which tracks i suppose.

The moral of the story or some shit i guess is that even if you are not doing art as a job it can still end up feeling like one and killing your creative spirit like one would and you need to be able to identify when this is happening and what things you dont actually want to create even though you feel like you "should" so you can kill these practices before they kill you

or something like that

I dont really care about having a point here i wrote this at 2 am

i just like talking

#this post will self destruct

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iccaruus · 3 years

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tw for mental health/psychosis/mentions of suicidal feelings in the tags. sorry i’m just emotional tonight and i need to talk about it somewhere but please feel free to ignore it

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