#I HAVE TO GO LIVE IN THE MIDDLE OF BUTT FUCK NOWHERE ON A FARM AGAIN
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Literally considering just fucking off and WWOOFing for a bit…………………….. gonna look into it
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Cramp
I ran my hands over his slick, muscular back and down to the waistband of his pants. I put my hands inside and down into his underwear, kneading his impossibly hard ass and pulling him into me more urgently. He was humping into me now with great strength, mashing into my body and pushing into my groin. His weight was squeezing my dick between us, occasionally putting intense, wonderful pressure on my balls, causing me to moan and squeal into his mouth.
I love running. I try to run every day, if my schedule allows it. Being out in nature in fresh air, powered just by the muscles in my body, is very peaceful and healing. And that runner’s high! That jolt of endorphins that courses through my body a few minutes into a long run helps propel me through the entire time and even helps keep me calm and grounded the rest of the day. And it also keeps my body tight and my butt sculpted…
This day was a day to forget. I had a rough time in the Bio lab - we were breeding fruit flies for genetics and sorting and counting them to determine the inheritance of their traits. A big group of the flies died, so we had to start over. And I tilted my tray at lunch and spilled soup all over my pants. I was really looking forward to getting out and going for a long run to sort the day out and get back to my mental base, so I could start over tomorrow.
I decided to go out into the rural area around our campus and just be away from everything, which is just what I needed today. It was a couple of miles through the suburbs before I got into the country, but the rolling hills and farms that dotted the landscape were so calm and quiet. It let me figuratively (and literally) yell out my stresses.
I was about an hour into my run and was a few miles away from campus, so I was figuring that I should start to make the turn and work my way back when I got a huge cramp in my leg. It happens every once in a while, and I can usually just run it out. Stress can make it worse, and today was the perfect day to add to it. I tried to run it off, then walk it off, but I could barely move. Fuuuuck. Here I was out in the middle of nowhere and could barely walk. Fucking perfect. I sat down on a boulder along the road and tried to massage the cramp out, but it wasn’t working that well. I knew that I shouldn’t sit too long, since it could make it worse, but it hurt so damned bad.
I was on that rock for about 15 minutes when a truck approached and slowed as they got close. Maybe they could help me get back to campus?
I stood and slowly went over to the truck and looked in the passenger window to find two soldiers in the army, both in their ACUs and berets. I saw the passenger had a medical emblem on his beret patch, so maybe he knew something that could help!
“Hey! Y’all are the first to drive by in forever!”
“Hey little dude. Are you ok?”
“I am out running and have a huge cramp in my leg that won’t work itself out.”
“Oh man, that sucks. Do you want a ride back to town? Where do you live?”
“I’m at school there and live in the dorms. That would be awesome! Thank you so much.”
They were both sexy as hell, but I was truly more in pain than I was horny at the moment. The passenger had pretty green eyes and a nice smile, and he looked tall, sitting in the seat of the truck. The driver was more of a bulldog with a shit-eating grin on his face and dark eyes. The passenger got out, and he was tall - taller than me by a few inches. He opened the back door of the truck and helped me get in, then he went around and got in the other side.
I settled into the bench seat in the back with my left leg extended and resting on the seat. The passenger introduced himself as Cole, and his friend was Hunter. They were stationed at the nearby army base. Cole was a medic, and Hunter was in the infantry. Hunter took off and was headed back to town, and Cole asked me if he could do anything to help me out.
“Thanks, but the ride is perfect. I would've been stuck out there forever if you guys hadn’t come by!”
“It's a good thing we went out there today. We were looking at a place to go fishing this weekend a friend told us about.”
“Oh cool! That sounds fun. Ouch!”
“What’s wrong?”
“My leg cramped up again. Fuck, that hurts!”
“Here, let me look at it.” He took off his uniform top and was in his t-shirt then reached over and ran a hand slowly up my left leg until he reached mid-thigh when I winced and pulled away some. He held there and slowly moved his warm hand over my thigh, trying to find the knot to work out. He found something and paused over it, the pain causing my leg to twitch and shiver, while he began to push and knead at the spot. It slowly started to feel better, and my leg relaxed under his persistent pressure.
He could tell I was relaxing and looked up at my face, a smile and relaxed look replacing the pain and worry that was there. While holding eye contact with me, he ran his hand slowly up the inside of my thigh until his fingers touched the bottom of my running shorts. He paused, still looking at my eyes that were darting back and forth between his hand and his eyes, before working his fingers under the band and continuing to advance up my thigh until they made contact with my ball sac. I relaxed further and slid down in the seat, pushing my groin down into his hand. He pulled his hand out of my shorts and grabbed my dick from the outside, squeezing and slowly jacking the length over my silky short material.
I moaned quietly and looked up at the front, seeing Hunter staring at us through the rearview mirror. Cole reached up and hooked the waistband of my shorts, pulling them down slowly as I raised my ass up off the seat. I always run commando, since my shorts have a lining in them, so I was soon naked on the back seat with Cole rubbing my leg again. He took off his shirt, revealing pale, hairless skin with sun-tanned arms and well-defined muscles on his chest and shoulders. It was clear he got built by work and not sculpting in the gym, and it made him hot as fuck. I leaned forward and ran my hands over his shoulders and chest, his firm muscles not yielding to my touch at all. He leaned toward me and brought his face closer to mine, rubbing his nose against mine before kissing me on the lips. I reached up and wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him to me and getting into the kiss. He spread my lips with his tongue and ran it over my teeth, fighting with my tongue for space inside my mouth. While we were kissing, I glanced up to see Hunter watching us again through the mirror. He kept driving, but I noticed we weren’t headed to campus any longer.
Cole pushed me over, and I leaned back against the seat and the door, my body stretched out. He came over on top of me, still in his uniform pants and boots. Our chests joined, spreading the sweat between us while we continued to kiss. I was as hard as a rock, and I could feel Cole’s dick through his thick pants, pushing into mine while we made out in the back. I ran my hands over his slick, muscular back and down to the waistband of his pants. I put my hands inside and down into his underwear, kneading his impossibly hard ass and pulling him into me more urgently. He was humping into me now with great strength, mashing into my body and pushing into my groin. His weight was squeezing my dick between us, occasionally putting intense, wonderful pressure on my balls, causing me to moan and squeal into his mouth.
I brought my hands out of his pants and wrapped them around his back, pulling him against me tightly. At the same time, I wrapped my legs around him, my spasming muscle warm and calm. I used my heels as spurs and pushed him into me firmly, causing him to hump into me stronger. He pulled away, and for a brief moment I was hanging off of him before I let go and fell back to the seat. I undid his belt and unzipped his pants, dropping them to mid thigh and bringing his dick into my view. It was about 7.5 inches long and really thick, veins running all over the length. His balls were large and hanging down loosely in a hair-covered sac.
I reached up and grabbed it, using both hands to wrap around the girth and cover the length, with the deep-purple head remaining uncovered and leaking pre-cum down onto my fingers. I jacked the length a few times, milking more pre-cum from inside and coating the head. He grabbed my hands off of his dick and held both of my wrists above my head then aimed his dick at my twitching hole with his other hand. He pushed forward and his slick head came in contact with my entrance, and after several pushes and moments to pause, he breached my sphincter and entered my body. He held still with his head just inside and looked me in the eyes intently, his nose flaring with each breath.
I wrapped my legs around him again and tried to pull him into me, but he held still, staring into my eyes with just the tip of his dick inside me. My ass was twitching around him, trying to pull him further inside, but he continued to hold still. He held my arms over my head, and I squirmed my body, twisting around and trying to get more of him inside me. I managed to get a little bit more, so I kept squirming, trying hard to get him inside. He continued to hold still and stare into my eyes, a smirk forming on his lips as I tried and tried in vain to have some control. He leaned forward and kissed me firmly then slowly pushed inside me until he was fully inserted, lodging his dick all the way inside my hole. I squealed into his mouth and moaned as he stretched me open, my ass twitching and spasming around his girth.
After holding inside me and allowing me to get used to him, he pulled out slowly then dropped his weight back down, driving himself into me fully, his balls slapping against my ass with the force of his thrust. He then pulled out and dropped back several times, stretching me open and nearly knocking the wind out of me with each drop. I tightened my legs around him, pulling my body tight against him, with my arms still trapped above my head. We continued to make out as he thrusted into me more urgently, my body rocking back and forth as I sort of swayed off of him. I was using my legs to pull myself against him then letting go, and we worked in concert to drive his dick into me until his balls pressed against my ring before nearly coming all the way out.
I was clamping my ass around his dick with each thrust into me, and it started to get to him. His kissing became more irregular, and he was grunting and moaning into my mouth. He broke the kiss and buried his face in my neck, grunting with each thrust into me until he pushed one last time and held tight, every muscle in my body tense and contracted to hold myself still against him. He roared and let loose 9-10 shots straight into my ass, his girth getting bigger with each spasm. After his last shot, he collapsed down onto the seat, crushing me underneath him. He stayed there for a few moments, getting his breath back to normal and his dick softening inside me. I relaxed and dropped my legs from around him as he let my wrists go to allow me hug him tightly, which we didn’t let go until Hunter announced we were on campus.
“Drew, which dorm are you in?”
“Crowe Hall, over on Ball Drive.”
Cole pulled out of me, and I contracted as tightly as I could so as to not lose any of his creamy load. He handed me my shorts, which I pulled on just as Hunter pulled up to the front of my dorm. Cole laid against the seat and didn’t make any movements to get dressed or get out, so I leaned over and gave him a big kiss, grabbing his dick and balls in my hand and squeezing very lightly, which elicited a giggle from him. I then opened the door and climbed out, shutting the door behind me. Hunter lowered the passenger window and told me that I owed him for the ride.
“Here’s my number. You can collect anytime. Thanks… for everything.” I winked at him then turned to walk up to the dorm and my room. I was walking a little funny, and Cole’s load was slowly leaking out of my hole, but my leg was fine. A good stretch is always the best way to treat a cramp!
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lalochezia with anyone you'd like
Lalochezia – The use of abusive language to relieve stress or ease pain.
When he and Kyle stop being the kind of friends who tell each other everything, Stan starts to get Cartman a little. That's not something he likes to admit. Even when he and Cartman saw each other every day at the bus stop or at school, they were almost, somehow, strangely, the least like what he'd call friends out of their group of four. Even Kyle hung out with Cartman alone more than he ever had; it was something that had made Stan jealous when they were best friends. Jealous and angry and bitter, that Kyle would want to spend time with Cartman over him, when they both knew how cruel Cartman was, and they both knew Cartman was cruelest to Kyle out of anyone.
He, however, rarely saw Cartman outside of the group setting, back when he and Kyle were really, truly close. It was only when all his real friends were sick or busy, or when Cartman had struck out on his plans and had come over to his house and done puppy dog eyes at his mom to get him to come out and play despite him shaking his head 'no'. They were each other's last resort. When the group was functioning the way it was supposed to, he had little tolerance for Cartman. And Cartman, realizing there was no room for him in Stan's life outside of the group, pretended that there wasn't any room for Stan in his.
When he and Kyle stopped living out of each other's pockets, Cartman saw his opening.
Stan knew what was happening. Cartman's manipulations had never been subtle.
"You know, a good best friend would be here. It's obvious how hard this move is hitting you," Cartman said, shoving chips in his mouth on Stan's couch.
It was a clear ploy to try and weasel his way in as Stan's best friend. Stan knew he was pulling the same shit on Kyle, too, to take his role as Kyle's best friend. He knew it. It was an open secret. But Cartman had something then, that he never had before. And that was Stan's agreement. Kyle hadn't come to visit him at Tegridy then, while Cartman and Kenny had both made the trip semi-regularly. But out loud he said, "It's a long trip." He wouldn't have defended Kyle to Kyle's own face. He complained about Kyle to his mom, and to Kenny, sometimes, and wouldn't have defended him from them, either. But this was Cartman. Kyle could take their friendship and run it through a paper shredder. He could eat it and shit it out. He could set it all on fire. If there was any part of their friendship that could endure, it was the part that wouldn't let Stan give Cartman the satisfaction of thinking Kyle was rotten.
"Me and Kyle are neighbors, dipshit. I'm here."
"A good best friend wouldn't call me 'dipshit'," Stan said, apathetic. "Wanna try again, lardo?"
"A good friend wouldn't call me fucking 'lardo', either, asshole!"
It almost made Stan laugh, a twisted-up Terrance and Phillip bit. 'I'm not your dipshit, lardo.' 'I'm not your lardo, asshole'.
"We're not friends," Stan said. He'd said it before, but he really truly meant it then. It carried a weight that their casual banter with Cartman rarely had. And he wondered who the hell he was friends with.
"Well, fine, then! Fuck you, too, Stan! I don't see anyone else lining up to talk to you, you lonely sack of crap!" Cartman went to the front door and opened it, calling out to the farm, "Hello? Anyone out there? Anyone want to be Stan's friend?"
Of course there was nothing. There was silence. There were acres and acres of empty farm. There was dust blowing up off the old dirt road.
"Yeah, that's what I thought," Cartman said. He turned back around, folding his arms. The screen door slammed closed, but the wooden door stayed open, letting Stan see the empty over Cartman's shoulder. "You've got two friends. Me and Kenny. How often can Kenny's poor ass visit you? If his parents buy gas, they're going to huff it, not use it to drive all the way out to Bumfuck, Nowhere."
Stan gnawed the inside of his mouth. He tried not to let Cartman know it got to him, but he'd been the one to give the opening. He'd been the one to say how far it was, out there on Tegridy. It took him a beat before he remembered to say, "Kyle's my friend, too."
Cartman's smile had gone Cheshire, wide and devious.
Stan knew he'd waited too long to object.
"Well if Kyle's going to be out here soon I guess I can go. Not like you need the company," Cartman said dismissively.
"You can stay if you want to. I don't give a crap," Stan said.
Stan knew that from Kyle, Cartman wouldn't have accepted that. He would've pushed his luck, asking for a specific invitation, demanding to be wanted. He probably would have gotten kicked out of the house just by asking for more dignity than Kyle was willing to give up.
But from Stan he didn't push for more. He settled for the apathy. Stan knew that was a bad thing, too. He knew even as Cartman's butt was settling back on his couch that he should've just told Cartman to fuck off. He should've taken the prospect of no friends at all over the prospect of friends with only Cartman. Instead, when Cartman sat back down, his heart loosened in relief.He needed someone, out in the middle of nowhere with no one around. Even if it was his last resort.
Cartman keeps coming after that, and Stan starts to get him in a way he never had before. In a way he'd never wanted to before. He starts to get the appeal of being selfish, really selfish. He starts to understand the desire of being actually mean. He's never been the nicest kid in the world or even the nicest kid in the class, but he's tried to do the right thing more than he hasn't. He's tried to be a person he can face in the mirror. There are still lines he won't cross and couldn't ever. Things that he kicks Cartman out of his house for. But it's easier to be alone if you convince yourself everyone else is an asshole. It's easier not to fight for what's right if you convince yourself the world doesn't deserve it. Cartman's way is a lot of things. It's mean and selfish and underhanded and he knows it. But Cartman's way is easier, and sometimes when everything feels hard, that's enough.
#long post#not meta#had to cut this short or it would've gotten nuts#south park#eric cartman#stan marsh
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BrO what if bakugou went to bakers southern parents house for the first time. Like on their way down there he’s like “oh my god did you fucking forget where they lived?? We’re in the middle of butt fuck no where!” And she would get onto him for cursing in front of their kids like that but she would also tell him to pipe down and that they’re almost there. When she pulls in he’s shocked. This bitch lives on a whole ass farm and bakugou has never even been on one before. The kids are so excited
Bakugo would be sitting there, grumpy and confused. I imagine he doesn’t like long, cramped car rides. he would just be uncomfortable. and while he loves his kids, traveling with them is a nightmare he never wanted to live. Kei is fine unless she starts screaming her lungs out, but it’s Akio that needs something to do during the ride. Bakugo would let him play a video game while they ride and whenever he wants a snack, since baker is the one driving, Bakugo has to be the one to give out snacks and such. he is annoyingly always asking how long it takes to get to her parents house and “where the fuck are you taking us? this looks like the middle of nowhere!” baker hates when he curses in front of the kids and doesn’t want him doing that when they get to her parents house. she is mainly focussed on the road and less on chastising him for his language though.
they finally pull into the long driveway of her parents farm and Bakugo is just sitting there in a quiet shock. Akio is jumping in his seat excited and Kei is getting whiny from being in her seat for so long; I mean they weren’t in ther efor hours but to go from the city to the country is a while for a baby. she is fussy when baker gets her out but when baker’s parents come out she gets giggly. baker’s parents are so happy to have them come visit them for the first time. I imagine they’re staying for a weekend or something. Bakugo is just kind of taking it all in, the house and barn, the smell, the view. Akio is excited to see all the animals and play with them, so baker’s dad takes him to the animal pens and her mom is gushing over baby Kei. Bakugo goes to baker and asks her if this is really where she grew up and she laughs at him softly and hugs him. she tells him in that sweet southern accent he loves so much that yes, this is where she grew up and how much fun it was. though she’s a city lady now, she won’t forget the joys of doing all of this. they look over and see grandma holding Kei and showing her the baby goats and Akio throwing chicken feed and getting flocked by the hungry things. she walks him over and lets him enjoy it too.
#tattoo artist au#tattoo artist bakugo#ex drummer bakugo#baker reader#southern belle reader#southern reader#plus sized reader#cute#fluffy#grandparents#domestic#country life#farm life#babies#bakugo and his son#bakugo x reader#katsuki bakugo x reader#bakugo katsuki x reader#bnha au#mha au
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Can I rant on main for a second? Like it's a really discombobulated rant, but a rant none the less.
How come people don't take chronic pain/illness seriously when it comes from a young person?? Like yeah, I'm not an old man, but that doesn't mean I don't fucking hurt.
Like seriously guys?
I have chronic migraines that aren't easy to deal with. The most I get told by my Dr. is just "take ibuprofen and you'll be fine." That's what I get told every time I bring it up. (before anyone says "go to a different Dr." I live in the butt fuck middle of nowhere. I'm not driving 100+ miles unless I'm dying. I don't have time or money for that.)
Not to mention I have a messed up shoulder (idk what that's about? Genetic? I don't know but I know it's not normal to be able to dislocate it on command, ha.) Plus a nasty pinched nerve in my hip that sometimes makes it so I can bearly walk some days. The shoulder and hip thing are really no big deal, I can power through those and just ignore it. The migraines, not so much.
Well the past 5 days I've been dealing with a migraine that just will not go away. I take some ibuprofen, it subsides for a couple hours to just an annoyance but then it's back full force again. Because of that I grind my teeth and now jaw and teeth just ache like a son of a bitch. So like, my head hurts, my jaw hurts to the point I don't even want to talk, depending on what my migraine feels like doing my vision gets fucky on me rendering me halfway blind every now and then, my stomach hurts. I'm crabby and barely have the mental energy to socialize and do people.
But like, I just got off work - keep in mind I do heavy physical labor. I don't even have my work boots untied yet and I have people yelling at me that need to go out and start doing chores, I need to get out to the field and finish moving round bales, ect ect.
Like Jesus Christ? There has been 3 people home ALL DAY???!!? I GOT MOST OF THE BALES MOVED OFF THE FEILD LAST NIGHT. YOU GUYS TOLD ME YOU HAD THE REST HANDLED, AND WOULD DO IT IN THE MORNING. FUCK YOU.
Like my family knows I've been hurting this past week. They know I work all day in and out of semis working in this stupid heat. They know I'm fucking exhausted. Yet as soon as I get home, they expect me to do all of the chores they said they were going to do. Like really? Yeah moving the bales suck. We don't have a fancy tractor or set up. We have an old 560 with a loader and chains. (Don't get me wrong, the old girl is as reliable as they come and has never give us a hard time in all of her life. It was my grandparents tractor and it's been in daily use since the day it was bought. But, it's an old tractor. There are no creature comforts and everything is done the old fashioned way.) But like??? Really?? Can I not just get home, sit on my fucking ass and relax? You guys have done nothing?? Like all day?? Did you guys even check water tanks to see if the horses need water? Probably not. Like fuck? I'm over here running on caffeine and ibuprofen just to function kinda normally, and you guys just chill in the house until I get off work. Why didn't you do any chores when it was cool out, fuck now it's in the high 90s and you expect me to do it now?
God damn. I hurt. Leave me alone, do your own chores. It's not my problem. Let me guess, you guys didn't even air up the tire yet on the tractor either? (Reason why I didn't finish moving bales last night. Leaky valve stem that we need to replace, just haven't had the time to yet.)
Like fuck. There's a reason why I hopped state when I turned 18 and didn't come back home for 5 years. I'm not a servant, and I shouldn't be expected to do everything around this farm while also maintaining my own life and chores. Like come on?
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T&T - Chapter 1: Castle of Glass
Author’s Notes | Hey guys! Welcome to this new series! This is an old idea inspired by THIS drabble that comes from one of my first celebrations here on Tumblr. Special thanks to @honestsycrets, who helped me to develop this OC. I hope you guys enjoy this work with me!
Info | Viking Age AU, fully out of the storyline of the series!
Words | 3002
⁑ Warnings: Mentions of violence and murderous intents, curse, mentions of sex.
"Take me down to the river-bend
Take me down to the fighting end
Wash the poison from off my skin
Show me how to be whole again"
Castle of Glass (Linkin Park, 2012)
"Who's Freydis? You can call me Katya... Queen... Katya!"
The sounds of her scandalous laughs were still echoing into his brain as he was dragging his dirty and crippled body on the mud of the ground once again.
The same mud he fought so hard to get rid of. The same body he broke so many times to see standing... Walking...
"What? I told you, Oleg... He was the weaker. A half-dozen of promises and he was eating in my hands..."
Fool.
From all his brothers, she chose the one whose heart was more easily deceivable. It would have been Sigurd if he didn't have cut his brother's heart in two not far from that day, but it was his. His need... His craving for dreams that now he felt could never be his.
"Mighty God, Ivar! Of course, it is not your child! How dumb do you need to be to believe you could make me a child when you weren't a man not even to fuck me? Even more to seed my womb..."
Now, like a shattered castle made of thin glass, everything he ever conquered was gone, along with the braces her bastard of a husband ripped from his legs and the crutch he ensured to break in front of Ivar's eyes. Destroyed like his pride... And his heart, broken by the moans of pleasure of the woman he once thought loved him; her naked breasts bouncing with Oleg's hips hitting in the middle of her legs, careless of the swollen belly he so many times worshiped, full of another's child he once thought was his own.
A fool. That's what he was. He was no god. And unlike he believed, maybe Björn wasn't the only brother the gods had abandoned. Maybe his gods were indeed fallen as Oleg screamed at his face when they stood at the iron doors of Kattegat, throwing him like a bag of trash with nothing but his clothes to survive the winter outside, dumped from his homeland like an outcast where he once was the king...
Maybe Ragnar's blood was curse inside his veins and like Sigurd, all of them were cursed. All sons of Ragnar would somehow face terrible destinies to maybe pay for his father's greed in leaving his simple farm to become a king.
Or maybe it was his own curse. Maybe it was the curse he attracted to himself by sacrificing that woman instead of Lagertha at the fire. The curse he attracted upon himself with the rage of the gods for he believed Freydis... No... Not Freydis. Katya's words... About his blood being divine. About him being more than just a man.
"For me, you're a god..."
His fingers clenched and his fist hit the ground once again, furious. Maybe the fury was what was keeping him alive and warm enough since the road was muddy around him and he had no proper clothes to cover himself. His own were dirty and he could feel they were wet. Soon the wounds in his legs would be infected. Oleg was right after all.
"I won't get my blade dirt with the rotten blood of Ragnar Lothbrok in your veins. I don't need to... Go. Drag your lame butt out of my kingdom, you rag of a man! I won't lose my time with you anymore."
He could swear he saw a smile on Katya's face and listened to her saying ironically that he wouldn't survive the winter before the doors of Kattegat were closed in his face.
Ivar couldn't really measure how long he had crawled without a destiny. Nor the many tears of pure rage he had already cried away from any eyes that could see his fury. First, he swore with clenched fists and teeth that he would come back and rip Oleg's heart from his chest! And sacrifice their child to the gods as a gift for his victory. And fuck Katya until she was ripped beyond healing just to expose her naked and ragged for everyone who wanted to see how much of a man he could be.
Now he was starting to believe he wouldn't really survive the cold unless he was able to find some warm place to settle down for a good night of rest and something more than raw roots to eat. With his eyes stupidly blue and his legs aching enough to make his movements harder than never in his life, Ivar was really thinking the gods' hands were against his chest, pushing him back, forcing him to give up and die that insignificant and unmemorable way.
The great, great Ivar the Boneless, frozen to death in some stupid road in the middle of nowhere. What a horrid fate! Even Sigurd among his brothers found his way to Valhalla, and there he was, sitting on the road, pulling his legs painfully to rest them against a stone and check on their wounds, trying to keep them dryer than his wet trousers could permit.
And as if his pain wasn't enough, before he could yell and warn, a woman came running out of nowhere, stumbling in his legs, breaking one of them before falling in the mud with a surprised squeal.
If he didn't have broken bones as a routine in his life, his scream of pain would have been heard from Kattegat for Oleg and Katya's pleasure. But all Ivar did was growling, infuriated, like a wounded animal that someone decided to kick for an unknown reason.
He thought about yelling at the woman and missed his daggers to sink one of them in her leg and give her a small fraction of the pain she increased in his body a thousand times. However, the curiosity was bigger than his anger when he saw the woman rolling at the mud with her cloak that was once so clean, covering her whole body with that dirty thing and sitting beside him as fast as she could, shrinking by his side, holding one of his arms.
Why the fuck was that woman doing this?
"Please... I beg your forgiveness and I promise on the gods and their sacred halls, I'll care for any wounds I have caused you, but please... Do not deliver me to them!" she mumbled, causing Ivar's expression to twist even more, utterly taken aback by her words.
"Who are you talking about, woman? What is..." he didn't have time to ask.
She shrunk under the hood and against his body and soon two men passed running in the same direction she was going before. They ran a little forward and not finding a trace of their prey, they came back. One of them roughly pushing Ivar's shoulder, speaking in a harsh tone as if he was somehow obligated to answer whatever they wanted to know.
"You... Crippled!" the man said, attracting the fierce blues of Ivar towards their face.
Oh, how he wanted to have his daggers now...
"Did you see a woman... Gorgeous silhouette, rounded breasts, curly black hair... Did she pass through here?"
Ivar kept looking at them for a moment. He could demand some gold from those bastards for the woman. He could get gold or silver enough to pay for a ride in a chariot and it would save his life for one more day.
But he could also sell her and receive nothing, for they were two enemies and he was only one, unarmed, one leg painfully broken, and his weakened body. They could just kill him and take her without paying him anything... She promised to care for her mistakes...
"Beyond crippled are you mute as well?" the man spat, grumpy. "These parents nowadays are too much a bunch of cunts... Too loose to get rid of a child even in this pitiful state, look at this bastard? Your father should have left you to the wolves, son!"
"I'm not your son," Ivar answered, angrily.
His voice sounded hoarse.
"And I saw no woman if that's what you wanna know. The only woman around is my sister beside me, who's sick with a contagious disease I wouldn't come too close and risk to take from us. Now get the hell out of our way... We have already enough burdens to deal with someone else's tasks!"
The two hunters stepped back, taking some distance from them both.
"Odin..." one of them mumbled. "May Eir have mercy and Hella take your lives soon. Why the fuck did they let you live? Fuck..."
"Let's go, Mir. We cannot lose time. The bitch must be going to Kattegat. It is not so far from here and we can get her there, let's go!" the other warned before they left, following the road Ivar had dragged himself through for the last three days and a half.
He still waited for a little more until the two bastards couldn't be seen anymore at the end of the road and then, Ivar turned himself to the woman by his side.
"I saved you. Now you owe me. What is happening and who are you, woman?" he asked, harshly, as she pulled the hood from her head, looking around to be sure the two hunters weren't after her anymore.
"Well... I'm Iliana," she mumbled, getting rid of the muddy cloak and looking at him. "I'm a whore and I stole their gold," she lied.
Of course, she lied. Ivar sighed, looking at her.
After Katya, he could smell the scent of a lie kilometers away from him...
"Now tell me if I h..." her voice was cut when his heavy hand held her wrist in a tight grip.
"I might be a cripple, but I'm not an idiot. Don't treat me as if you didn't owe me your life... Why were those hunters running after you, Iliana?"
His eyes were fierce and for the first time since she left her master's house, she felt fear.
Iliana had passed through several hands to know that glare in Ivar's eyes wasn't something you could play with...
"They're slave hunters... And my master wants me back. But I won't go back to his hands unless one of them decides the payment is not enough for the work of getting me alive and wants to take my corpse for him to use!" she grunted, pulling her hand from Ivar's grip, massaging the wrist his strong fingers almost broke.
Ivar straightened the gloves he managed to keep from his leather armor that was taken from him by Oleg and his men, looking at her with the same fierceness in his eyes he was throwing towards those men.
So, she was a fugitive... It could be interesting to him. Maybe someone more was searching for her and he could indeed find a way to sell her in order to get enough money for his needs. Something that he would think until they were in the next city. For now, she could be useful.
"You didn't tell me your name," she said, not calling him the same awful way everyone was calling him since Oleg undressed him from his titles.
A cripple...
"I'm Ivar," he answered, not denying her the truth.
But instead of what he thought, she didn't make any questions.
Her eyes were too focused on the awful and inhuman angle of his leg to really hear the name he spoke so naturally.
"My lady Eir... Aren't you feeling this?" she kneeled beside him, looking at the broken leg.
It wasn't an exposed fracture, but surely his bone was terribly broken. Any man or woman or human being would be screaming in terrible pain with that wound and yet, he was there, calm and doing nothing but clench his teeth while moving to get himself sitting straight.
"I can't properly feel my legs," he explained. "And after all, ... I broke them all the time, every day... It's something I'm used to."
Used to...
Iliana sighed.
She couldn't understand how a man was completely still with a horribly broken bone, but she could understand his words about pain: after all these years being whipped, abused, cut, raped... All those pains were not something harsh for her anymore.
She leaned herself to touch his leg and so, Ivar flinched, looking at her and holding her hand once again in a quick movement that made Iliana ponder if he was just a simple cripple.
"Do not touch me," he sentenced, demanding.
But Iliana kept her position looking at him.
"If I can't touch you, then I can't help with your wound. And you may be used to this pain, but you don't seem to have any frostbite I can see. You may not deal with the pain, but sooner or later this wound will make you slower and then, my friend, you'll discover pain can always find a way to make you suffer again."
Ivar looked at her.
Somehow, that woman wasn't a common slave. She was wise... Her words weren't random, but he could feel the experience of someone who was speaking with the property of lived moments; experienced pain... She knew what she was talking about and so, he released her hand, observing as she slowly placed his leg in the correct position, gathering straight twigs from the dry and frozen trees around until she had enough to create a strong structure around his leg, ripping a piece of her skirt in strands she used to tie the wood to his leg creating something similar to his braces.
When she finished, his leg was properly immobilized and the wound wasn't aching that much anymore.
Maybe selling her would be a mistake after all: the woman knew good techniques that could probably help him to survive.
"Where are you going now?" Ivar asked, looking at her.
"I was indeed going to Kattegat, hoping I could sneak into some boat and leave this continent. But now... Now I have to think," she stopped, looking around. "Maybe Vestfold..."
Ivar scoffed and she looked at him, surprised by his reaction, but his words prevented Iliana from giving his scoff an angry answer.
"You'll find nothing but death in Vestfold now. They're under observation and soon will be under attack. The same bastards that did this to me now have their eyes turned towards their lands. Oleg won't stop until he has the whole Scandinavia under his feet and Harald might be whatever he wants, but that old drunken bastard won't be able to defend Vestfold all by himself."
Iliana didn't let pass his words.
"The same bastards who did this to you?" she looked at him.
A cripple, around his twenties, calling King Harald by names no peasant would dare to speak.
"What did you say was your name again?" she asked.
But Ivar just straightened his chest and back, looking at her with those imposing and fierce blues that weren't supposed to be in the face of a ragged man like him.
"I'm Ivar, son of Ragnar Lothbrok, woman," he spoke, imposing. "I'm Ivar the Boneless!"
Her body shivered on its base. Ivar the Boneless. The feared king of Kattegat... What was he doing muddy and dragging himself like a homeless man around his own town?
However, she didn't have to ask. Ivar's imposing position didn't last too much and he sighed, letting go of that ruthlessness and looking at her with defeat in his blues.
"I was betrayed by the woman I once called my queen. And overthrown by my enemies who threw me away from my homelands as if I was nothing but an outcast. Maybe we can help each other, Iliana, the slave," he said, looking right into her eyes. "You seem to know very well how to heal my wounds and you're a very beautiful woman, if I may say. I'm sure you can get us some good money..."
"I won't sell myself for your needs, Ivar, the fallen king!" she said, mocking him with the words as if he had mocked her with the title of slave.
But he scoffed again looking at her.
"Don't be stupid, woman," he said, sighing. "You don't need to lay with them for a few coins when I can kill them to have the whole bags they carry."
Ivar's words shocked Iliana not only by how naturally he was speaking of taking lives but also because somehow... They were making sense... If he was really the Boneless as he said, that would be a thought she would understand coming from his mind.
"You stop the next chariot for a ride and while the coachman is busy with his eyes inside your cleavage, I can get us a free horse and a warm chariot for you to travel. Since the hunters are looking for a woman alone and walking, they will have no reason to receive information about a lady in a chariot driven by a cripple..."
How many times did she think she could do it? Seduce a man, kill him for the gold in his pockets... She even tried it once and ended up being fucked for hours by a man who didn't pay her a dime for the amazing night of sex she offered him because of her inability to sink the dagger through his neck...
Ivar didn't seem like a man who would hesitate as she did...
"I don't have a single dime with me. Also, no weapon. And you don't seem to have anything with you as well..." she pointed.
But Ivar just touched her skirt, pulling the rest of the piece she tore to tie his leg, creating a new strand he wrapped around both of his hands, pulling it from both sides to test the tension of the cloth.
"It will serve..." he said, and Iliana's blood ran cold imagining his plans with that thing.
She would have to hear a man struggling for his oxygen that day.
But both of them would have a warm place to sleep that night...
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#history vikings#imagine vikings#ivar#ivar the boneless#ivar imagine#ivar x OC#ivar ragnarsson#ivar lothbrok#ivar's heathen army#sister wives#T&T
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what is the name of the town that everyone lives in?does it even take place in one town?
I haven’t said, because it’s roughly Toronto (or Greater Toronto Area), but if you think about how and where everyone lives, it doesn’t make a lot of sense? Like...
APID’s supposed to be on it’s own big complex just outside the city (if you’re familiar with Toronto, then it’d be in Vaughan or Etobicoke or Scarborough or somewhere with just a lot of extra space).
Lino, Dante, and company used to live in apartments downtown but have moved uptown to a much nicer house.
Fay and Dari basically live in a farm house in the middle of butt fuck nowhere (maybe like Rural King or somewhere in Aurora or Richmond Hill).
Camilo moved from a one bedroom apartment to a two bedroom near his school (probably UofT Scarborough). Marcita is nearby.
Dusty has a shitty apartment somewhere.
Nathan’s house is likely on the edge of the Charles Sauriel Conservation Area in the Don Valley, because that’s the most foresty you can get without going too far out of the city.
Nari has a condo unit somewhere nice.
Dax and Samara share a condo somewhere less nice.
Diederich has an apartment unit in a really shitty building somewhere not nice but on a ley line.
Reid and Aoife share an apartment somewhere of average niceness.
Syd does not want you to know where they live. Köbi lives there too for the time being.
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Cold Feet Cold Body
So we have our players, 3 girls and two boys. In my dream they did not have names so I will just retroactively give them names that I think fit them. My name is Maria. My female friends’ names are Tina and Janine. Tina is a dyed blond with her roots showing, she likes to do smokey eyes but never really washes away the rest of her makeup correctly and it always ends up looking a bit too smudged. Janine is a yes girl with a big mop of curly black hair on her head and warm-toned skin, she is always beautiful and on point. I never get to see myself but in snippits of movement I can see I have dark-ish skin and thick dark colored hair. Our men are Travis, a man who looks like Adam Devine in a Anders Holm-style hat, and Jared his associate, a man that is tall and jacked.
Our plot begins with me being invited to be a bridesmaid at Tina's wedding. We’re living in a relatively metropolitan area that is skirted on all sides by farmland (much like DFW) and her dream, even though she has NO REALATION WHATSOEVER to the country, is to have the ultimate country wedding. She has always liked the idea of barn raisings and such. In her wedding preparations she has become a 'country girl' and even adopted a slight southern twang even though she is from California born and raised. I find this detestable but am very polite and smile through the fields of fake. I want to believe Janine is my guiding light, I try to take her aside to talk about it but in dipping my toe into the water I realize that she cannot even tell the difference and is just elated to be maid of honor. I am at a loss. While preparing for the wedding realize the most perplexing thing; I have not met or heard of the groom, a man by the name of Timothy. For some reason I find it weird that no one is allowed to slang it to Tim, his visage seems too elegant and I am suspicious. Timothy is apparently loaded and rents us out a mansion-like air bnb in the middle-of-nowhere farm country to do our wedding preparations. The wedding itself will be held at a neighboring farm, ONLY 20 miles out and the preparations there are going smoothly. The groom and the groomsmen will be staying at that location, but it is not as updated as our location, and he wanted us to be pampered and have a girls spa weekend prior to the Sunday wedding.
On Friday morning we arrive, I park and find mysterious Timothy helping his beloved move all her things into the air bnb. It turns out he is actually my high school boyfriend TIM who dumped me after cheating on me with some 'skank' at a party. I found out via an old friend Bernice, who had been at the party and showed me photos of him macking on some blond chick in a skimpy pink tube top and then taking her into one of the bedrooms. We do a flashback of the scene and me dumping him while pouring an entire route 44 over his head. Back in the present I make pleasantries with him. He doesn't seem to remember me but I am not surprised. It's been about 11 years since then and we only dated a few months in freshman year. Tina giddily grabs his arm to officially introduce us and of course Janine asks the stereotypical question of “how did you guys meet?” It turns out that Tina was the 'skank' at the party and we have another flashback revealing so. She refers to the 'me' in the story as 'some bitch' that she gladly stole this hunk away from. She says they lost touch after their one night stand but then by fate they met up again about 6 months ago and the sex was 'just as good'. I am furious, I have been friends with Tina since high school. I know for a fact she knows what I went through, she was with me while I was ugly crying in the high school bathrooms. I am already on edge when she brings out a dog. A big fluffy husky who turns happily at the sight of his owners (Tina and Timothy). My fists clench. That is my dog. This is where it gets really strange, apparently. I lost my dog earlier that year having a bad time (maybe there can be a bad year montage at the beginning of the movie) and Tina offered to help me look. She was the one who insisted that I finally give up after about a month, but I was heartbroken nonetheless. I mention that out loud that he looks just like my Archduke Ferdinand. I can see the cracks in her glass smile as she says “oh hun, not this again, I just loved your sweet pooch so much I had to get one of my own! Is it too soon?” She turns to Timothy to ask him to take the dog with him and I insist it's ok. I have a sure fire way of figuring it out, I just need a moment alone with the dog. After hauling in the rest of the belongings, I say goodbye to TIM much to his discharge.
We spend the rest of the morning setting up the house and taking stock. There are some farm animals in the house and, while from the outside it looks like a regular old fashioned country two story, on the inside it is a totally decked out fully modern gorgeous property. The backyard has endless greenery rolling up to a crashing wave of cedar forest lining the property. There is a gnarly hundred-year-old oak tree on the eastern half of the property. As Tina is setting up her expansive makeup collection in the bathroom and Janine has decided to lay down on the couch and take advantage of cable, I met up with 'Fluffykins' in the yard. When I had Archduke Ferdinand, I had him micro-chipped. Out here in the middle of nowhere I can't actually get it checked to see if he’s mine but I do remember that he was mistakenly micro-chipped in his butt instead of his back due to his eagerness. I doubt anyone else would make a similar mistake. He follows me eagerly (remembering me?) and I go to investigate a local shed on the property. Opening the door looks like a scene out of a horror move; you see my silhouette power stance in the doorway of the dark and cobwebbed palace of yard instruments. While a stud finder can't identify any microchip information, it can ping you to its location in the dog. A quick swipe over the butt and I hear the ping. I drop to my knees and shed a few tears and hug my dog. He struggles and licks my face in confusion. After I am able to recollect myself I am furious, the rages of Satan burn in my eyes and we have a montage of some stupid things that Tina has done to me over the years. “Oh yeah, those bangs totally suit you!” “No girl that dress does not make you look fat.” “Oh honey, there is no way a man can resist a girl with frosted tips.”
Oh why did I let her go with me to the salon more than once. This 'bitch' has been ruining my life for years and I am done. I breath in, sigh, and Ferdinand follows me out of the shed and I lock up shop. I go inside and put on my customer service smile and greet Tina who whines at me and asks me where I have been. I tell her that I was just getting some fresh air and she makes a note about how she doesn't want the humidity to throw off my hair because we all have to look in sync. The corner of my mouth twitches but I stay focused. I ask about food options and she sighs haughtily saying she couldn't get the host to feed us so we are going to have to send someone to go get food. I offer quickly and she thanks me with a fake sickly sweet sound. Everything about her looks like a cracked up doll: the eyes too big, the smile too painted on, and I can't take it. I go down to a local 'grocery store' or shall I say dollar mart and pick up what can be turned into meals for us for the weekend. This is where we meet Travis and Jared. They are bumming it in the back of a pickup in the parking lot, drinking monster energy drinks and doing chew. I put my bags in the car and approach them. They begin to puff out their chests like birds to hit on me and I stop them right in their tracks. “Hey fellas I have a fucked up idea, want in?” They deflate immediately and seem a bit scared of how abrasive I am. I tell them the gist of what is going on and Jared is particularly passionate about taking another person’s dog. I thank him and I ask him if they could pull a little Texas Chainsaw Massacre and come over to scare the shit out of the girls tonight. That will teach Tina to be in a place she doesn't understand and crack her fake-ass exterior. They seem reluctant so I offer them each 50$ and they are in.
The plan is they go at the house Strangers style, with no intention of actually entering the house and we will disconnect the phone lines prior. I make a mental note to unplug the girls’ phones and tamper with the lock screens to keep the brightness on so they lose battery and we are 'trapped'. They understand their limits and not to hurt anyone and we are golden. I give them the address and we are set.
I return with the food and Tina nitpicks my choices while Janine makes the best of it. The rest of the evening is uneventful, while Tina complains that she wishes she had catered a sushi platter to us instead of the burgers we were forced to eat because the meat goes straight to her non existent flat ass. As it gets dark I put my phone plan into action and convince the girls to watch a horror movie to really set the mood. We watch Friday the 13th and at 11 p.m. the fun begins. I hear the boys shit truck putter by on the highway, they honk just driving past the house to alert me that they will be parking down the road and on their way. The movie still has 15 minutes and this could not have been planned better. As the movie winds down the boys make it to the property. First they disconnect the power. The girls scream in the dark and I follow suit, I’m a pretty good actor after years of putting up with Tina's bullshit. As we head as a group for the breaker box outside the house, a light hung just above the small scary shed to make it even more erie is still on and tall Jared is standing under it in a mask. Tina is terrified and runs back inside the house, Janine pulls on my should and screams we need our phones. We run back in, lock the door, and the girls run for their cells phones finding them all to be drained and dead. They also cannot seem to find the cords to their chargers. Tina immediately blames me for my shitty unpacking for some reason and I snap at her in the heat of the moment that her dumb-ass fiancee must have misplaced them! Janine is crying, poor girl, she does not deserve this but she is an innocent bystander in what must be done. Ferdinand is pacing by the back glass door whimpering. Tina asks him what's wrong. He barks and a sickle shines just right and scratches down the glass. The girls freak out and run around the house. Tina makes a beeline for a neighboring bedroom instead of the master for some reason. Meanwhile the boys are laughing outside about what a good job they are doing, they are over in the barn with the other animals laughing about why a sickle is even on the property. “Are they harvesting wheat like the slavery ages?” Travis has a great idea to let the animals out and Jared is skeptical, he doesn't want them to get hurt. Travis says “Why would they? It’s a closed property. They'll probably just run amok.” So Jared agrees and they open the barn and all the cages. The horse runs out first and they snicker about which windows they should harass next.
Back in the house shit gets real when Tina pulls out a fucking gun from the top of the extra bedroom closet on the second floor. Both Janine and I are twice as on edge. “When the fuck did you get that?!” Janine asks (a huge anti-gun person). Tina says “Shut the fuck up Janine, you know they could have stopped Sandy Hook if the teacher would have been armed.” Janine is furious and Tina loads the gun and holds it loosely in her hand, the two of them bicker and I am panicking. I have to tell the boys to get out as soon as possible this has gone tits up and that is when I here a smash of glass downstairs. Tina takes front position and we all get dead silent. I panic realizing we never set up a safe-word and knock over a decorative vase in the hallway. Tina pivots the gun at me and I shout a little too loudly for her to GET THAT FUCKING GUN AWAY FROM ME, hoping to alert the boys and also scolding myself remembering that I told them specifically not to come inside the house. We reach the bottom of the stairs and we hear some non-specific crashing in an adjacent room, we move around the corner and see nothing and then, jump-scare, it’s the fucking horse, his eyes illuminated red with the flashlight we found in an upstairs bathroom sink cabinet. Tina fires the gun instantly, missing the horse and the thing goes fucking nuts, kicking and neighing destroying everything. We collectively lose our minds and scatter. The boys are on the east of the house and contemplate if that was a gunshot. Jared says “This shit is too much” and that they should bail. Travis agrees and as they pass the gnarled oak they hear a sound and turn. It’s a mother raccoon. Jared punches Travis for scaring him and comments on how cute it is. Travis tells him to fuck off and screams at the animal hoping to scare it off for scaring him. It full on attacks him and he runs careening around the corner of the house with Jared cursing under his breath to help him.
A lot of other high-jinks ensue over the night and in the morning we are all wrecked. Especially Tina whose hair is a rats nest and her smokey eye has become a smokey face. We trapped the boys at some point and somehow by the grace of god they do not blame me, they just say they were trying to have some fun with city girls and something about gentrification of air bnb in the area, surprising everyone with their wit. I took the gun away from Tina and am rubbing my temples with it in my hand. She was too trigger happy anyway. I end up sighing and saying fuck it and come clean about everything, going from screaming to tears, Tina is sympathetic and right when we are about to make up there is a crackle in the tree line and something gray comes running at us in full speed. In total automatic reflex Tina grabs the gun an fires at it thinking its the raccoon, but its Ferdinand, he is hit. Everyone goes into fast motion at that point, we bring him to the vets office and in the waiting room Tina and I have a screaming match and everything comes out.
Unfortunately like most dreams there is no real ending... Though I wish there was...
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Sum’n Bitch: pt3
|2 years later…|
“Why won’t you just tell me what to do, Steph? Just tell me! I’ll do whatever you want. But I will not let you treat me like a damn carpet. That I won’t go through again.” I could hear my father say behind the door. I looked over at Nicole and sighed.
“Do you think they’re gonna get a divorce?” She asked me. I shrugged.
“It’s possible…” I frowned.
“Good. Then I won’t have to have a freak like you for a sister.” She snarled, turning on her heel to go to her room.
2 years ago, I got in trouble for making Nicole bald. My father and her mother went out to dinner to discuss our punishment. Instead of discussing punishment, they ended up talking about each other’s lives and found that they were kinda similar. They continued talking for a while and they soon began to date. Knowing my father, he’d propose to her once they reached a year. He moves quickly that way. My sweetheart of a father. He fell for Stephanie’s elegance and humor. She fell for his strong arms and big heart. The thing about my dad was that he was always there to listen to you and regardless of whether you wanted to talk or not, he managed to get it out of you and make you feel better. Stephanie was a good cook and was pretty. Overtime, she would take Nicole and I shopping for dresses to go to formals and dinners. She didn’t like the fact that I did magic though. Throughout my school years, I had gotten stronger and started practicing physical magic like binding, immobilization, telekinesis, false memory; but the trouble came as I practiced levitation… This particular night, I was practicing levitation on myself. I had gotten the hang of levitating simple things like books, pencils, dressers…. my bed even; so I decided to try it out. I sat on my bed, crossing my legs and whispering incantations, white candles lit all around me. I focused on my breathing and relaxed my muscles, thinking to myself “light as a feather” repeatedly. The words spilled past my lips like a prayer. It was quiet and peaceful…..until I heard her scream.
“OH MY GOD! MOOOOOM!!!!” Nicole was hollering bloody murder, running down the halls. My heart was pounding and I was terrified. I didn’t want anybody to find out anything yet. Especially my father. I flopped on the bed from midair and ran after her.
“Christ, Nicole, what is it?” Stephanie asked, placing a hand on her shoulder, my dad looking at me with worry. This happened often, Nicole telling on me. However, tonight felt different. This wasn’t any regular terrorizing moment….
“Maya’s a freak! Mom we can’t stay here anymore! She’s a demon! She’s possessed- fuck I don’t know! Something’s not right with her!” She cried grabbing my father’s arm.
“Dad I’m not-”
“She was floating above her bed just now!” She shouted.
“Steph-”
“She’s a devil worshipper, mom!” She said and I began to panic.
“Daddy, help me!” I cried, hyperventilating uncontrollably. I shook my head as I backed away, the ground beginning to shake like an earthquake. I was terrified. Nicole latched onto Stephanie and screamed. My father tried his best to get us to calm down so he could quickly think of an evacuation plan. But once I stopped crying and my anxiety calmed, the ground stopped vibrating. I looked at my family with confusion and terror. I was genuinely afraid of myself.
“You did that? You did didn’t you?! I knew it! Mom see I told you! She worships Satan!” Nicole screamed, pointing at me.
“Nicole, relax. She’s not a devil worshipper.” My father said rushing to me, holding me close to large chest.
“Are you positive, Virgil?! She’s always got her head stuck in some weird leather book and it’s in a language I don’t understand!” She exclaimed.
“It’s not the bloody book of Satan!” I screamed.
“You guys I swear! You have to believe me!” She cried. “She was like four feet off her bed when I went in there! Candles were lit, there were a bunch of weird rocks out-”
“Daddy, they’re cleansing crystals!” I shouted.
“Ok that’s it! I’ve had enough of this.” Stephanie said pushing by us all to go upstairs into my room.
“Stephanie, what are you doing?!” I yelled, running after her. But my father paused me.
“Maya, stay right here.” He said running upstairs after her.
“Like hell I will!” I exclaimed, running up after them. By the time I had gotten to my room, the door closed in my face. I banged on the door until my fists hurt. “Don’t touch my shit!” I screamed. I could hear them shouting things that I couldn’t make out beneath the sound of clutter and movement. Then I heard something large hit the floor, causing a loud noise. I jumped. I was genuinely worried about what was happening behind my closed door.
“What are they saying?” Nicole asked sinisterly, instinctively I turned and punched her in the gut, not feeling even the littlest bit of guilt, before turning to place my ear to the door again.
“This is against God in every way, Virgil, and you just let her do this?!” I heard her shout.
“It’s books, candles, and a couple gemstones, Steph! What’s wrong with that?! She’s not hurting anybody!” I heard my dad defend me until his second marriage fell apart and that hurt my heart.
“So everything Nicole had been telling me was the truth and I didn’t believe her… I didn’t want to believe her. I didn’t want to be against my own step daughter!” Stephanie yelled, rummaging through my things.
“So then don’t!” my father snapped.
“Spell books, Virgil?! Really?!”
“They’re white spells! They’re innocent!”
“Jesus Christ…” They went on like this until they stopped arguing about me and started arguing about each other. Nicole and I sat by the door until it opened. She would leave and come back when things sounded interesting but I stayed by the door faithfully. When it finally did, Stephanie looked at me with a never before seen look of hatred. “Nicole, pack your things. We’re leaving.” She said before walking away. The look on my father’s face was heartbreaking. I glared at Nicole with tears in my eyes.
“What did I ever do to you?” I croaked, trying my hardest to breathe. “I hate you….” With that, she stood and walked away, her lip trembling. I couldn’t tell if it was from anger or sadness. But I wasn’t alright after that… I turned to look at my dad and his eyes were filled with sadness as he looked back at me. I curled into a ball and began to cry. I didn’t do anything but why did I feel so guilty. I also felt slightly privileged to have a father that would accept me and protect me regardless of whether he was married or not. “Dad… I’m sorry…. I never meant to….”
“This wasn’t your fault, baby girl…. You have to believe that…” he told me, engulfing my small frame into his arms, kissing the top of my head. Even though he said that, I couldn’t believe it. I knew it was my fault. By the time Nicole graduated, she and Stephanie had moved out and I had transferred to a new school. We moved to the middle of Butt-Fuck-Nowhere, Kansas. I had to say goodbye to Louise and I cried a lot that day. I hated Nicole Healy for destroying everything good in my life.
|Lawrence, Kansas|
It was a week before my senior year began and we just moved into our new house. When junior year ended, it was the greatest gift I could’ve ever received. Being 19 was a breeze. My summer had come and gone rather quickly though. I had one year left to complete in an entirely new school. No one knew me at all. It was awful. I didn’t know anyone in Kansas. ‘What would I even talk about with these people?’ I thought as I decorated my new room with succulents and candles. I groaned at my new surroundings. It was nothing but farms and small town communities. Something like a fall postcard. Had my situation been a little different, I might’ve loved it. There was nothing interesting here. I set up my plants along the windowsill and hung up trinkets from the ceiling when the doorbell rang. I looked outside my window (just to be nosy) and saw the prettiest black car sitting in the driveway. The very same car that I begged my father for when I got my license but all I got was a stupid, beat up junkyard Ford truck. I almost didn’t notice my name being called whilst admiring its beauty. I looked in the mirror to fix my big, coily hair, adjusting my red checkered shirt as I made my way to the front door. I was greeted by a tall man with dark hair and a salt and peppered beard. He was tall with kind brown eyes and a friendly crest white smile played across his lips. Standing behind him was the most gorgeous pair of young green eyes that I had ever seen. His jaw was chiseled and he had short, classically spiked sandy blonde hair. His face bore a look of confidence and I also picked up hints of obnoxious cockiness. I didn’t know how to feel about that trait just yet. He was broad shouldered and his wide, muscular chest was covered by a thin grey tee shirt; his arms long and probably the size of my head. He was a bit shorter than the other man but I could tell he was at least 6 feet even….
“Maya. This is John and Dean Winchester. They’re our neighbors.” My dad said in a positively toned voice.
“How ya doin’, sweetheart?” The older man whom I believed was John put out a large hand for me to shake with a warm smile. Shyly I took it and shook. My eyes wandered to the 1967 black Impala but the younger one locked eyes with me, interrupting my train of thought and line of sight.
“Hiya, princess.” Dean smirked with a quick wink. He may have been cute but I could always smell trouble when it was presented to me and Dean Winchester was the epitome of trouble.
“Howdy…” I said, completely unamused by his greasiness. I tried once more to look at the Impala and he turned to see that I was ogling the vehicle.
“Y’know, it looks a lot better up close if you wanna check it out.” He said and I looked at him with a closed lip grin, nodding immediately. “After you…” He said gesturing the way. I looked at my father biting my lip and squeezed between John to run towards the shiny beauty.
When I got to it, I peaked my head inside to view the beige leather interior, smiling from ear to ear. I walked around it, admiring every dip and curve of its shape. “Is it yours?” I asked.
“Nah, she’s my dad’s. We work on her together.” Dean stated proudly, sitting on the hood of the car.
“She?” I asked raising my eyebrows.
“We call her Baby.” He chuckled.
“That’s hot.” I joked and he laughed.
“Yeah. It catches on.” He smiled. He was damn near a perfect human being. His eyelashes were long and brightened the seriousness in his eyes a bit. The cocky smile played across his smooth pink lips as he watched my hands slowly glide over Baby’s shiny black coat of paint. “You wanna ride?” He smirked. I whipped my head to look at him with widened eyes, my face burning red.
“Y-You mean the car right?” I stuttered. I was completely flustered. ‘Of course he meant the car, dumbass!’ I thought, mentally smacking myself for my stupidity as he hopped off the hood.
“What did you think I meant?” He grinned as he stood towering a whole extra head and shoulders above me. The wind blew, pushing my hair in different directions as I bit my lip hard, trying to think of something to say. I decided to just not answer the question.
“Hey dad! We’re gonna take a ride!” I shouted to my dad, jumping into the passenger seat of the Impala as he and John held their doorway conversation.
“Oh- ok. Be- Hey! Be safe! Wear a seatbelt!” He shouted.
“I know, daddy!” I chirped.
“Aye, Dean! Keep it under 80, buddy!” John yelled with a laugh.
“Yeah, yeah!” He said as he pulled the keys from the front pocket his dirty jeans. He climbed inside and sat down with a grunt. He jammed the keys in the ignition and turned the volume all the way up on the radio, “Immigrant Song” blasting obnoxiously loud. I smiled and began to bounce up and down in my seat with excitement as I heard Baby purring beneath the music. I could feel the engine running from where I sat. “YOU ALL SET?!” He shouted above the music with a grand smile.
“HELL YEAH!” I chuckled.
“Hell yeah!” He laughed as he stepped on the gas.
We drove down the street at lightning speed. We may have been going a bit faster than 80. The wind blowing at my face, the roar of the car, the attractive company… I felt like my day was starting to turn around. During our adventure, we stopped at a gas station and bought a ton of snacks and a case of beer. “I won’t tell anybody.” He said to me with a toothy grin. We bonded over our choice of snacks: mini pies, bbq chips, the mini pizzas that you cook in the store; all the way down to the gummy bears and sour gummy worms. We took our snacks and drove all the way out to a secluded area by a lake where we decided to kick it and shoot the shit for a while. Dean and I got to know each other rather quickly. He wasn’t much older than me. Only 21. He loved his family. His face lit up like a Christmas tree whenever he brought them up. Like me, his mother passed away and I still remembered the sting when my mother took her own life. His mother passed in a fire though, which was arguably worse. However, I believe that losing a mother is the worst thing that could happen to a person in general. Our father’s were there though. And Dean had a brother about my age. He just recently went to college. He didn’t leave on the best of terms, but I could tell that Dean was still proud of him. I told him all about my interest in magic and that I was a witch in practice as I sat on the roof of the car with my legs crossed, devouring my cheese puffs. His face contorted a bit as I spoke and that worried me; I feared that I might’ve messed up a friendship. “What kinda magic do you do?” He asked me, casually sipping on his summer lager before continuing to eat his nachos.
“What do you mean ‘what kind’?” I said, knitting my eyebrows together. He took his lager and sat it in the roof next to me, taking a couple steps back from the car to look at me.
“Y’know. What kind? Like do you practice black magic, Hoodoo, Wicca spells, campy magic, alchemy, ceremonial magic…” he listed them off and I got more and more confused. Maybe I didn’t know as much about magic as I thought I did. “You don’t even know?....can you even do anything?” He chuckled. Maybe he was taking me for a joke. Maybe he didn’t think that I was serious.
“Well...yeah-”
“Mmmmm. And what is it that you can do?” He said sarcastically.
“I can levitate.”
“Pansy shit…” he coughed.
“Excuse me?” I chuckled.
“I said we need...some fans n shit. Because it’s hot out here.” He chuckled nervously.
“You’re so full of shit!” I giggled.
“And so are you! Show me your levitation.”
“I can’t do it on command….. I need my candles….” I pouted as a corner of his lips pulled up.
“If you’re a real witch, you should be able to do it no problem.” He teased as he approached the car, resting his forearms on the roof. He was absolutely right. “Look… I’m not gonna tell you to stop doing what you love. I’m just sayin’ dig deeper.” He said grabbing his beer to take a sip. “You don’t need candles to cast spells. Candles are there to raise inspiration. Now there are a few spells that require a candle but that’s because someone probably made this candle with ingredients used to cast a spell.” He explained. I just listened, soaking up all the information he had to give me.
“How do you know so much about this stuff anyways?” I asked scooting to the edge of the roof to dangle my short legs off the side.
“I uh…. I like to read.” He said.
“Liar.” I chuckled.
“Seriously!” He laughed, smacking my calf. “Ok so maybe I watch a bit too much TV.” He said with a chuckle.
“I knew it. It’s all bullshit.” I laughed.
“It’s not! I promise. I may or may not have tried a thing or two.” He shrugged.
“And what do you know about witchcraft?” I smirked.
“You’re not in any position to judge me! You can’t even levitate without your candles.” He was mocking me. But he didn’t push me away at all. The more we talked, the closer he got to me. He was a fair bit of distance from me when we first got here. Now, he stood so close, grinning in my face. He began to open up to me about his feelings and told me all about how he would go traveling with his dad and brother. We debated healthily over whether cherry pie was the best pie. He swore it was because it was his favorite but I knew for a fact it didn’t hold a flame to my dad’s sweet potato pie. It was beauty in itself. Then we would talk about music. He was a strong classic rock supporter and I was right along with him. For the first time in a long time, I found a kindred spirit almost identical to me in every way. Eventually, the night came and I had to say goodbye. After he drove me home, we traded numbers and stayed outside of the house continuing to talk a while longer. “So there’s a new burger joint opening in town and I was wondering if maybe you wanted to go?” He asked me suddenly.
“You had me at burger.” I grinned. Eventually, dad opened up the door. He and John were drinking beer and watching a baseball game.
“So you finally came back, huh?” John joked from the living room as we came inside.
“Where’d you guys go?” My father asked.
“I just took her to Clinton. We grabbed some snacks, sat out there, got to know each other a little bit…” Dean answered. He looked to me and I just smiled. Not a fake smile but a real smile for once.
“Cool...cool. Sounds like you had fun.” He said, a hint of relief in his voice.
“Yeah, we had a good time.” I said. A moment of comfortable silence passed over and John groaned as he stood up to put his beer bottle in the trash.
“Well, Virgil. I had a great time. We’ll have to have you and your lovely daughter over for dinner some time, yeah?” John smiled as he and my father shook hands.
“Sounds like a plan.” My dad smiled.
“Alright then! Guess we better be headin’ out.” He said. “It was nice to meet you, Maya. You guys enjoy the rest of your night. Dean!”
“Yup!” He said militantly. When it came to his father, he was like a soldier awaiting further orders. He looked at me and winked before following behind his tall father. “I’ll pick you up in the morning?” He asked at the last minute.
“Okay.” I smiled shyly.
“10 alright?”
“10’s fine.”
“Alright! I’ll see ya.”
My father and I waited in the doorway from the to see that they drove off safely and finally went inside. “What are you guys doing tomorrow?” He asked me as I went to grab a bottle of water.
“A new burger place just opened up. We’re gonna go.” I said smiling a bit too hard.
“Oh ok…. that Dean Winchester looks at you like he likes you. I don’t like it.” He joked, hugging me and kissing my cheek.
“Dad!” I groaned in embarrassment as I settled into his hug. He sighed.
“Do you like it here?” He asked me.
“I mean… it’s not Texas but…. it’s an adjustment.” I answered as honestly as possible. “I’ll be ok.”
“Are you sure?” He asked. I nodded.
#supernatural fanfic#supernatural fandom#supernatural fanfiction#supernatural#supernatural poc#supernatural smut#supernaural imagines#supernatural headcannons#sam and dean#sam winchester#dean winchester#sumnbitch#dean winchester x oc#sam winchester x oc#fictober18
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A Helping Hand (werewolf short story)
The truck screeched to a stop as his body flew through the air. His head smashed the windshield and knocked him out cold. His lifeless body landed with a thud long before the vehicle came to a stop. His body slid and bounced into the ditch on the other side of the country road. Overgrown grass swayed over his bloodied body as the cool fall afternoon air tickled his fresh wounds. He wasn’t dead, but close to it. The driver walked over to where the unfortunate victim laid. They stood at the edge of the cracked road for a moment before looking around. They were in the middle of nowhere. Far from the loud city and busy streets. Not a car in sight. The driver hopped into their vehicle and drove off, leaving only a blood splatter and skid marks leading to the poor, unlucky student, Jay.
Being unconscious isn’t all that bad. It’s like having a nightmare but you get to wake up with a headache and whatever perpetual pain you would have felt all at once. His whole life was that of a sob story, and now to add insult to injury, here he lays, internally bleeding and bones snapped, in a ditch barely alive. He slowly opened his eyes hours later. This was not his first concussion but a first for being hit by a car. He wiggled his toes and flicked his fingers amidst the pain.
“Okay, not paralyzed. That’s good. I guess.” He muttered to himself. He turned his head and closely examined his left arm. He was no doctor but he could tell it was broken by noticing the bone was sticking outside of his body. He sighed and used his other non-broken arm to push himself up. Every movement he made was extremely painful and disorienting. He stumbled to his feet and looked around. It was dark now.
“Okay.” He took a painful breath, “I just have to”, He was cut off by every muscle in his body aching at once. “Oh, fuck me.” He stated to no one. This happened every night like clockwork. He wanted to fight it, try to hold off until he got home, but he was too tired. He gave in and let it just happen. His bones shifted and muscles tensed. Fur began to grow and his skin began to tear. He didn’t trust the wolf inside him but there was no locking him in the cell at home now. He blacked out from the pain, earlier than normal, which didn’t bother him all that much. He was just worried what he was going to wake up to this time.
He regained conscience from his forced nap but kept his eyes closed. He was terrified of where he might have ended up. He listened for any sounds of disturbance before opening his eyes. He was on his living room floor, naked, and covered in bruises. He rose to his feet, slowly, looking around. He was alone. His bone was no longer pultruding from his arm, which he figured was a good side note. Jay liked to try to stay on the positive side of situations. He didn’t question how. His arm and whatever other bones were no longer cracked and broken, but he was covered in road rash and bruises. He was sore. Jay thought the wolf was a wild, blood thirsty monster that was uncontrollable. He was relieved that He didn’t wake up in an orphanage covered in dead children or wherever else. He was late for school and that was his biggest worry for now at least. He put on a pair of shorts and an old tee and headed out the door. He walked through the heavily wooded area where he lived. He liked the privacy of no neighbors, even if it was a necessity.
He made it to the strip of road where he had been so rudely left to die. It’s not like being a werewolf gives him any special powers. Jay wasn’t overly strong, have a high pain tolerance or have sensitive hearing. He was just a normal kid who got hit by a truck and was inches from death. Well yeah, his bones healed overnight but the rest of it sucked. No parties, no staying up late, no friends. He found his torn clothes and scooped up his pants. He reached into the ruined pants pocket to retrieve his wallet and phone, which unsurprisingly was smashed to pieces. He sighed and headed back home. It was only a mile or so back to his house but that didn’t stop his body from telling him he was in pain.
He arrived back home and went straight to bed to rest. He set his alarm and closed his eyes for what felt like just a moment, but was actually ten hours. He felt mildly better. He walked outside of his little cabin in the woods to a small garage where he had wonderfully crafted a beautiful jail cell for his wolf counterpart. He thought being a werewolf just meant one transformation a month, but it wasn’t that simple. Every night for the past six years, between the hours of nine and ten pm, depending on the day, he had to endure this cycle. Clothes off, door locked, tv on, and wait. He didn’t have a job, obviously, but made money doing odd jobs. Not enough to spend on a bicycle, but enough to not be forced into a ramen noodle cliché. The waves of discomfort were followed by waves of pain signaling that it was time. He took a deep breath and tried to relax.
Jay decided to take a few days off from school to heal up. Highschool sucked enough without the physical pain. He had to walk the five miles from just outside of town to get to the large school. He always arrived early to get free school breakfast, which was nothing more than expired cereal with watered down milk. During the day, nobody seemed to notice that he had been missing, or was covered in lacerations, which was fine for him. He didn’t like the attention. He sat in history in the back while the teacher slash basketball coach played a movie semi related to history.
“Psst”, quietly echoed in his direction. Jay looked over to the girl sitting next to him who had attempted to grab his attention. “What happened to your arms?” She whispered over to him. He didn’t think of an excuse because no one ever talks to him anyway. “Umm, I fell down a hill”, he lied, badly.
“Are you okay?” She asked, with a genuine care in her tone. “Yeah” he replied, “I’m okay, thanks for asking”. Jay smiled a bit on accident. The brown hair swaying across the girl’s green eyes had him hooked quickly. She smiled back and turned to finish watching the movie. Sometimes you forget how it feels to have someone, even momentarily care about you. It felt good.
School had let out and jay started his way across the student parking lot. He saw a range from new Mercedes to old Buicks. Why would any parent let their child drive such an expensive car? He thought, as a car pulled up beside him. The window rolled down to reveal two green eyes looking back at him.
“Hey”, the girl called out with a smile, “umm, I always see you walking down the street, do you, like, not have a ride?” “Oh, no I don’t live far so I just walk to save gas money” he said, lying badly, again. “Can I give you a ride?” She asked, unlocking the doors. Jay wanted badly to not have to walk home. He was still sore and tired. Plus, the girl was cute so he did not care if she kidnapped him. “No, thank you”, He said disappointingly. He knew he could not have people knowing where he lived. It was too dangerous. Jay did not have someone to give him rules or guidelines, but he did watch a lot of werewolf movies and letting people into your life was not a great plan. She let her smile fade slightly before calling out again. “Please? I feel bad you have to walk home every day” She said, making a playful sad face. Jay shook his head and put on his best fake smile in hopes to convince himself as well as her that he did not want a ride. “I appreciate the offer, really, but I’m okay.” He waved and walked off before she could ask again. “O... Okay!”, she called out behind him, “I’ll see you in class tomorrow! I’m Katie by the way!” She added.
Katie was a quiet, nerdy girl who loved to doodle and not take notes in class. She somehow managed to skate by in her classes with a B or a C, which was fine for her. Her parents didn’t seem to notice her all that much amongst her other siblings. She felt bad, seeing Jay walk away with a slight limp, covered in bandages. She shook her head and drove off. She was determined to help him any way she could.
She went down the road that led to the grocery store. She loved to bake and knew cookies could make anyone feel better. She picked out her ingredients and headed back out of town. She drove towards her parent’s small farm. She drove only a few miles before passing someone walking down the old road. She glanced in her rear-view mirror and recognized the man as Jay. She was about to stop and go back before she saw that he had turned and was heading into the forested area. That guy is getting some fuckin cookies, she thought to herself, smiling like a villain. She raced home and began to bake.
Fuck, where did he turn at, she thought to herself. Her car smelled like delicious sugar cookies and old socks. She crept along the road looking for a path of any sort, but it was getting dark. She thought about giving up and avoiding the stalker like vibe she might give off when she spotted a light in the distance. Bingo, she thought as she turned down onto an overgrown path. She pulled up to the house and exited her car, delicious cookies in hand. She bumped the car door closed with her butt and walked up to the door. The door was old and rotted, but she knocked anyways. There was no answer so she raised her hand to knock again when she heard a strange noise from the small garage across from the house. A light was shining through the window and she began to walk towards the building. The garage door was shut and locked with a padlock, but the side door looked unbarred. She peaked through the window but only saw random junk and trinkets. The noise sounded like metal bars being banged around inside, so she figured that was a good sign as any and opened the door.
The plate of homemade cookies fell to the ground and she was met with the gaze of a very large bear. A strange looking bear. A bear with the face of a large dog. Her brain bounced back and forth trying to figure out what on earth was inside of this cage. She was snapped out of her trance when the large creature reached as far out of the cage as he could and slashed at the intruder. She was startled and backed up towards the door, even though the monsters reach was several feet short. The creature growled and snarled, still trying to inch its way toward the girl. That’s a goddamned werewolf her brain screamed. She was terrified and couldn’t move. She could only stand in fear as the wolf desperately tried to slash her open. She stood and watched for a few minutes before the wolf began to calm down. The wolf starred at her and only growled, no longer flailing his arms at her. She bent down and picked up a single cookie. She tossed it at the wolf who was unfazed by her offering. His blue eyes were locked on her and only her. She sat down on the cold concrete next to her pile of floor cookies.
“S… So…” She stuttered, “D... Don’t like c…Cookies?”
The wolf continued to stare and growl at the unwanted guest. She was shaking but couldn’t leave. This was by far the coolest thing she has ever stumbled upon.
Katie eventually decided after an hour of studying the locked animal that it was time to go home. She didn’t even bother thinking of telling someone about this because who in their right mind would believe this? She collected the cookies and slowly walked out the door, watching the beast for the last few seconds. She closed the door and took a deep breath. “What the fuck”, she quietly exclaimed. She shook her head and made her way back to her car. She dropped the cookies in the passenger seat, still awestruck and drove out of the woods, back to the old country road. Her mind raced at every scenario she could play out. Taking photos, video calls, bringing people over, none of it played out well in her favor. She arrived home and entered her empty house. The newer construction of a country home was nice and cozy. She locked the door just in case the monster escaped and followed her home. It made sense, the wolf didn’t have a key, how could he get in? He. It. Jay.
The wolf calmed down after the intruder had left. His small prison kept his anger contained for the most part, but it never stopped him from trying to escape. The wolf didn’t understand why he was locked up all the time. He was aware of the human inside of him. He knew he didn’t like the wolf but all the wolf wanted to do was protect the human. Make sure he was properly fed and kept safe. Speaking of food, that cookie the intruder tried to poison him with smelled delicious. The wolf scooped up the cookie which looked small in his massive paw. He gave it a sniff and ate it in one bite. He’s eaten worse.
Morning came as Jay woke up from his sleep. He stretched and yawned, and unlocked his cage. Jays morning routine was simple. Make sure he didn’t murder any families in his sleep, get dressed and walk to school. The wolf had escaped a few times, but fortunately, there was no unlucky campers nearby. He headed off to school and about halfway there, he heard a car approaching from behind. He glanced back and recognized the small car and the girl waving at him as it slowed down. Katie usually drove by him every morning but never bothered to offer a ride. She pulled up next to him and gestured for him to get in. Jay waved her off once again, but she was persistent.
“If you don’t get in I’m just gonna follow you” She called out, matching his slow pace. Jay shook his head but figured she wouldn’t give up. He sighed and opened the door. It smelled like old socks and cookies. Katie knew his amazing secret and was enthralled by it. She dreamt about it. She fantasized about it. This was the coolest thing ever. But obviously she couldn’t just tell him. So, she would do anything to get closer. Small talk was forced as she drove them to school. She parked the car in the parking lot and turned off the engine.
“So, can I give you a ride after school?” She asked, hoping for jay to give in. “I live like right down the road from you anyways”. Jay pondered for a moment, knowing that it would give him more free time on his brief time frame before his nightly cycle. He sighed. “Okay, and thank you”, he said defeatedly. She smiled. All according to plan.
The night came slow as Katie decided to go back and try again with the cookies. This time peanut butter. She wondered if Jay Liked peanut butter. Dogs love peanut butter. Is that racist? She asked herself. She wanted to be safe and chocolate was a questionable risk. She made her way back to his house and down the faded path. The house light once again was off, but the garage light shined. She parked and opened the door of her car to the sounds of metal banging from the garage. She paused for a moment. She looked up to the sky and saw the moon was only half full. She grabbed her plate of snacks and headed to the garage. The sounds stopped when she turned the door knob. She slowly opened the door to a sight of a large monster trying to rip her to shreds. She jumped and dropped the plate of cookies once again. “Fuck!” she uncontrollably shouted. She wasn’t really expecting a wolf again. What if this was just a monster and Jay is keeping it as a pet? She thought, glancing over to see Jays clothes, folded neatly on the table along with his back pack. Guess not. The wolf growled and swiped at her again like the night before. He wanted her dead, bad.
“H... Hey. It’s me again. Remember?” She said. The wolf knew exactly who it was. She picked up the cookies and sat down, just out of reach. She began to eat one of the floor cookies and looked at the beast trying to kill her. It was fascinating.
“S... So...” She stuttered, “How are you?” She said jokingly. The wolf stopped swiping at growled. He could understand her perfectly, but her voice only made him angrier. She looked deeper into his icy eyes, wondering if Jay was in there somewhere. She slid a cookie over to the wolf, who once again, did not flinch. His eyes remained locked. The wolf did however seem to calm down faster than before, which Katie noticed. Maybe the wolf does recognize me. She thought. She smiled at that thought. Maybe the wolf and her could be secret friends.
The next night she headed back over to Jay’s house with a fresh batch of cookies. She loved making cookies and knew Jay would appreciate them. She pulled into the path and drove towards the dim lit garage. She stopped outside of the house and stared. The house was dark again. Three days in a row? She thought. No. Maybe he’s just working on something. She exited the car and heard the familiar sounds of banging bars. She slowly opened the side door to see her old friend, the wolf in all his fuzzy glory, trying to murder her. Luckily this time she did not drop the cookies. The wolf growled and glared but ceased his lunges. He was calmer than before. He is recognizing me, she thought, smiling uncontrollably. The wolf stared as she sat down with the plate of cookies. She took a bite and lifted another outstretched in front of her.
“Want one?” She asked the wolf. The wolf did not respond, but only stared. She slid the cookie within his reach. The wolf stared at her, then glanced down, then back at her. Progress! She screamed internally. The wolf hunched over and picked up the cookie. He stared at the girl and took a bite. He watched her intently and she did the same. He finished the snack in two bites and she slid another. The wolf stared but reached down and ate the second. The wolf seemed to enjoy them enough at least.
“I’m Katie”, she said. The wolf blinked slowly. He knew who she was.
The next night, she had a little more planned out. She brought a bad of supplies: A sketchbook, a few novels, and some assorted snacks. Fifty fifty seeing the wolf or jay, but she was prepared for either. She pulled up the garage noting the light shining through. Wolf it is, she thought, grabbing her bag. The slowly opened the garage door and the wolf was already watching her. Almost like he knew she would be there. He softly growled but did not lunge or try to attack. Katie could barely hold in her excitement. The wolf was less and less aggressive each time. She sat down and opened her sketchbook. She reached in her bag and pulled out a bag of beef jerky. She tossed a large piece over to her new friend. She began to sketch the wolf in his unnatural habitat who had begun to chew on the tough jerky. When he finished, she tossed him a new piece and continued her drawing. She sketched until the jerky ran out, which was faster than she had hoped. She reached back into her bag again and revealed a new book.
“This is my favorite book”, she exclaimed proudly to the wolf, who seemed interested in her bag of goodies. “It’s called “The girl with the dragon tattoo”” She said, showing off the cover. She opened the book and began to read to the wolf. The monster watched her intently as she read page by page. The wolf sat down directly across from her and continued to listen. She couldn’t stop smiling as the wolf was relaxing around her.
School flew by quickly as Katie day dreamed about going over to Jay’s house for her secret friendship. Every night, she had gone over and met with the wolf. And every night, he was a little more relaxed, almost happy, when she arrived. She dropped jay off at his house and went home. Later that night, she packed up and headed out again. The wolf greeted her with a tall wag and panted. Tonight, she felt adventurous. She couldn’t control herself. She had to do it. She reached into her bag and pulled out a large chunk of jerky and walked closer to the cage. The wolf watched and she slowly stepped past the invisible line of the wolfs reach. She held out the dried meat to the wolf’s massive mouth where he slowly and carefully removed it from her hand with his sharp teeth. She sighed relief and started the second part of her plan immediately. She reached with her other hand through the cage and touched his chest. His fur was short and extremely soft. He was overly warm to the touch, like a large fuzzy heated blanket. She scratched his chest and looked up to him. He seemed to enjoy being petted. She gave a small laugh and smiled, continually petting him. Weeks and weeks of preparation had led up to this moment. She was successful in her endeavors. She glanced over to the padlock on the cell door. She knew the key was on his pile of clothes. She stopped scratching and walked over to the key. She took a deep breath and turned back towards the door. She looked up and the wolf, who had cocked his head to the side slightly. She reached out with her hand towards the wolfs muzzle. He bent down and let her pet him again. She smiled and unlocked the door.
The wolf watched the gate open to the unprotected girl. He stepped forward towards her. She was not afraid of the big bad wolf. The wolf hunched over and sniffed at her neck before nuzzling her. She wrapped her arms around the soft monster and held him close. Weeks of preparation and planning had paid off. The wolf bit into the girl’s shoulder with all his might. The girl could only scream in horror at the mistake she was now fully aware of. The wolf knew exactly who the girl was. He could smell it from the day she stepped onto the property. He pulled back and tore out the muscle and bone from the helpless girl. She fell to the ground and the massive wolf followed. Her arms flailed at the wolf to no avail. The wolf bit into her chest. The wolf was excited. He knew jay would not let him out of the cage again. He knew this was his only chance. The girl screamed out to the cold November air, but there was no one around for miles to help her. The wolf finally had his revenge. The girl had tried to hide her guilt but that only made the wolf want her more. Her smell drove the wolf crazy but she finally trusted him enough to let him out. The wolf was not a wild animal. He was smart. Calculated. He didn’t need to be locked away in a cage every night. He knew right from wrong and would never hurt anyone without reason. Like hitting his human with a truck and leaving him to die in a ditch.
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This fic is dedicated to @evakoorhelm and is a little random, I know.
Isak stood next to the gated fence to a field in the middle of nowhere. Beside him, Even stood with a grin the size of Cheshire cat's on his face. His hands were deep in his pockets and his breath was visible as it spilled from his lips into the cold. Isak really wasn't wearing enough layers for this. On the other hand, Even was more than prepared as always.
“What are we-”
“Just wait, it won't be long now.” Even interrupted, turning that grin on Isak.
The corners of Isak's own lips kicked up into a small smile at the sight of it. He could never resist. Even's smile was contagious.
“The things I do for you,” Isak said, it was a grumble but there was no real untoward feeling in it.
Even closed the distance between them, his smile becoming a playful pout as he wrapped his arms around Isak's waist, tugging him flush against his tall form. “Oh, baby, am I a lot of work?”
Isak tried to school the smile that was determined to break across his face and he looked away, avoiding his pouty boyfriend looking down at him. That only caused Even to pout that full bottom lip all the more.
“You look ridiculous,” Isak said, still doing his best to cast an air of indifference.
“How would you know? You're not looking at me,” Even replied, the arms embracing Isak, giving him a little squeeze. Isak finally turned his head back, his own arms now coming up to curl around his boyfriend's neck. One hand gripped at the fabric of the hood he had pulled up, the other resting on the back of his denim jacket.
“I know you better than anyone. I don't need to be looking at you to know when you're being ridiculous,” Isak smirked, leaning up and catching that bottom lip in his teeth. It was a playful gesture more than anything but Even took it as a chance to press his lips to Isak's. Isak let go of Even's lip, tilting his head as he gave himself over to the kiss. His hands yearned to wander and he could tell Even felt much the same by the way his own hands clutched at Isak's hoody.
Neither of the boys were sure how long had passed, when someone with a deep voice cleared their throat. Isak sprang back from Even as if his lips had caught fire. Even raised a brow of amusement at Isak, noticing the pink flush on his cheeks that had nothing to do with the cold weather. Isak was mostly fine with public displays of affection these days but nobody liked to be crept up on while making out with their boyfriend.
Even kept an arm around Isak, feeling the tension ease out of him after the initial shock. His smile warmed his features as he addressed the older man that'd interrupted them. “Halla, Karl?”
Isak stole a glance up at Even, confused as to how Even knew this guy.
“Yes, that's me,” Karl replied, tipping his hat to the boys before leaning his forearms on the fence that separated them. “It's a bit of a walk to the barn to see the ladies. Did you bring your welly boots?”
Isak looked down at his trainers and then noticed Even had wore thick rubber boots that Isak hadn't seen before.
Shit.
Isak leaned up and whispered to Even, “Why didn't you tell me?”
Even laughed, as if the reason was incredibly obvious. “Well, I didn't want to ruin the surprise.”
“So uh, we going?” Karl interrupted again, looking between them. Even nodded in reply and Isak grumbled as he eyed the muddy field. Karl unlocked the gate and swung it open and Even guided Isak through with the arm he still had wrapped around his waist.
It wasn't so much that Isak cared about staying clean but these shoes had to do him for a while. He was so preoccupied watching the mud cake his trainers that Isak only realised they'd reached their destination when Even came to a stop. He lifted his gaze and it fell upon an old barn or outbuilding. It was brick with big wooden doors, both of which hadn't seen a coat of paint in quite a while if the peeling was anything to go by. Confused didn't come close to what he was feeling right now.
“Even wh-” Isak began, looking searchingly at his boyfriend.
But Karl interrupted yet again, “She's in the bottom stall. I've separated her from the others for the time being, just so you can meet her.”
“Meet her? What the fuck is going on?” All kinds of scenarios were running through Isak's head. None of them rational.
Even laughed and the sound was starting to grate on Isak's nerves. He really didn't like not being in the know.
“Relax, baby,” Even said, stepping behind Isak and gripping his shoulders. He then directed him towards the barn door. “You'll love her.”
A sense of foreboding gathered in the pit of Isak's stomach as they entered the barn. He wasn't entirely sure why. Even hadn't ever steered him wrong before, literally or figuratively. Isak glanced over his shoulder, Even still behind moving him forward with his hands on Isak's shoulders. The smile on Even's face eased the knot in Isak's stomach and he almost felt bad for it being there in the first place.
Once he was out of his head a little, Isak began to take in his surroundings a little more. The smell of farm hit his nostrils and the sound of animals filled his ears. He looked in the stalls as he passed them but he couldn't see anything.
Finally they reached the end stall and Even turned Isak to face it. He came up flush against the smaller boy's back and curled his arms around his chest. Isak's brows drew together as his eyes finally fell on the 'she' Even and Karl had been talking about.
A cow.
Or rather, a calf.
She was lying amongst the hay scattered across the floor of her stall, her legs tucked underneath her. She was white all over, aside from her dark ears that flickered every now and then, and her glossy black nose. Weirdly, she had an unamused expression. Could cows have expressions?
“It's a cow...” Isak said slowly.
“She's a cow,” Even corrected, ushering Isak towards the door of the stall a little more.
“Why?”
“Why is she a cow? Um, she was born that way?” Even reached out and lifted the latch on the door of the stall and ushered Isak inside. “Honestly, Isak, that's pretty rude.”
Isak rolled his eyes and pulled out of Even's embrace, walking towards the small cow and crouching down in front of her. Her big eyes looked up at him through thick lashes. Isak tentatively reached out, stroking a hand against the thicker tuft of fur on her forehead. “She's cute, I'll give you that.”
Even came to stoop beside Isak, leaning in and kissing his cheek before whispering against his ear. “She's ours.”
Isak turned, regarding Even with sceptical eyes. There was a note of worry in his expression too. “Ours...? What do you mean she's ours?”
For a split second Isak thought perhaps Even had had some kind of manic impulse and had bought them a cow. But by now Isak was pretty used to Even's moods and he was sure he would have picked up on a shift like that before he was stolen away to a farm in the middle of nowhere and presented with a cow. To be honest, he felt guilty for even thinking it.
Even laughed, his hand coming up to cup Isak's cheek as he leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to his lips. “Oh, love, your face is priceless,” he said as he pulled away, letting his hand fall from Isak's cheek.
“You still haven't explained what you mean by 'she's ours'...” Isak replied, looking back to the calf that was now looking between them both as if following the conversation. “”How can we have a cow? We live in an apartment. I didn't read all of the terms and conditions but I'm pretty sure this,” he gestured towards the calf, “is against them.”
Even nudged Isak's shoulders with his own before letting his hand scratch under the baby animal's chin. It lifted it's head up a bit, obviously enjoying the touch. Was there anyone or anything that Even couldn't wrap around his little finger? Isak doubted it.
“She's not going to live with us, idiot. She's going to live here. It's a rescue,” Even explained, turning that handsome smile on Isak again. “We sponsor her and can come up and visit any time we want. We even get to name her because she's still so young.”
The anxiety in Isak's gut bled from him and a smile rose on his lips. However, he still felt guilty for assuming the worst. Even leaned in and kissed his smile, happy to finally see it. “I knew you'd love her.”
Isak turned back to the calf, reaching out again to stroke her. This time she rose to her feet, now looking down at them where they crouched on the floor. She walked towards Isak, her head nuzzling him and knocking him off balance. He fell on to his butt, his landing cushioned by the thick layer straw that lined the floor. The calf took the opportunity to lie down in Isak's lap, pinning him to the ground. Even was cracking up beside him and Isak tried to hold in a laugh too. “What the fuck is she doing?”
“I think she's enjoying your company,” Even said, petting down her back. Her ears flickered and Isak assumed that meant she was enjoying that too.
“So what's her name then?” Isak asked. As he continued petting her face, she pressed her glossy black nose against his cheek. Isak tried to pull away from the snuffling wet press of it but her weight on his legs made it impossible. “Ugh!”
“Well, I had told Sonja about her and she suggested naming her after her but I thought people may get the wrong impression,” Even said, laughing at Isak's struggle as he ran the hand he hadn't been petting the calf with through his hair. It was obvious he was a little awkward bringing up his ex.
“You told Sonja about her?” Isak said, lifting his gaze to Even. He'd been the one to encourage Even's friendship with her. They'd been together a long time and they hadn't broken up because Even didn't care about her anymore. He just wasn't in love with her. Sonja had been pretty great when Isak didn't have a clue how to be there for Even and Isak hated the thought of Even losing that. Their friendship had been tentative at best but better than you'd expect considering their break up. It just struck Isak odd that Even would talk to her about this of all things.
“Yeah, Sonja put me in touch with Karl. She volunteers here,” Even said with a casual shrug of his shoulders. “She was telling me about her being born two nights ago and I know they have a sponsor programme, so I enquired.”
“Oh,” Isak said, his eyes drifting back to the animal in his lap. “So her name?”
“Does it bother you?” Even asked, an almost pained look on his face. Isak hated himself for putting it there, especially when Even was trying to do something nice for him. For them both.
“Of course not,” he lied. Well, not lied. It did bother him but he was more annoyed by the fact that it did bother him. It was a reaction he didn't want but couldn't prevent. He liked Sonja, he was happy she and Even were getting along. But there would always be a discomfort there for many reasons, not only the fact she was Even's ex. “I'm glad things are better with you two.”
He hated how insincere it sounded even to his own ears and the look on Even's face was sceptical. “Really, baby, I promise.”
Even leaned in and kissed his lip again, cradling the back of Isak's neck in his palm as he tilted his head. A soft sigh spilled from Isak's lips and Even took the opportunity to sweep his tongue inside, eliciting a sweet noise from Isak as their tongues met.
Just then the cow shifted in his lap and it dawned on Isak just how weird it was to be French kissing while a baby animal took up residence on your knee. He pulled back, laughing at the thought. “Okay, okay. Stop,” he panted, his hand coming up to push on Even's chest. He felt Even's smile spread against his lips before he saw it.
“Her name is Bea,” Even said, returning to petting thick white fur on top of the calf's head. “It means bringer of happiness.”
Even's eyes sparkled with something and Isak couldn't contain the broad smile that spread across his face. “Seems to be working.”
“Look how fucking cute she is, how could it not?” Even said, pressing his cheek into the fur on the side of Bea's cheek. She turned her head towards him, now catching him with that glossy wet nose.
“Bea,” Isak sounded out the name on his tongue. “Welcome to our little family.”
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I've been following you for a really long time and this is the first time I've ever wanted to ask you a question. But why would you go camping alone without any light? That's just a really dumb thing to do...
(in ref to my tags here im pretty sure)
gather round, dear followers, for a series of anecdotes from Hell Camp, the source of my best and worst stories
when i was twelve my school sent all its year nine students class by class to a five-week camp, which will henceforth be called Hell Camp. here is the setup:
a four-hour drive out of the city into the outback, where there is a farm owned by the school for the express purpose of hosting Hell Camp
28 girls and 28 boys, each in their own dorm houses
no phones. no computers, no ipods, no TV. no internet (within our reach). we cooked our own food on fire stoves and wrote letters by hand to our parents and friends
no lollies, no soft drinks or juice, all our eggs and milk came off the farm
wake up at 5:30am every day to go for a 3km run and then chores on the farm, from milking the cows to chopping our firewood
Bible study every night because this was a Christian private school
“why???” u may ask. “why did your school subject tweens to a month of this???” supposedly to build character and teach u life skills but tbh idk how knowing how to crack a bullwhip is supposed to help me in life
but it wasnt just five weeks straight of same ol farm life there were other activities they had us do!! camp-like activities!! for example:
Pre-Survival
three days to prepare us because we were innocent younglings who barely knew how to start a fire
basically a campsite in the middle of fuckass nowhere? we rode horses there while the counselors (the Hell Camp resident teachers, but ones that deadlift 50kgs and kill spiders without batting an eye) drove with our bags and stuff and laughed as we got inevitably lost
have u ever used a dunny u have to empty urself
it is so gross. there is a field marked out explicitly for burying everyone’s shit, and u have to take turns. so gross.
there was a shower which was a metal shed with a bucket of water hung up, which u heated over the fire before u went in and prayed it wasn’t too hot
this was like winter time and we slept in swags on the ground and when we woke up there was frost on our swags
i made an iron horseshoe??? the temptation to touch red hot metal is ridiculous tbh it looks so pretty
someone did touch theirs. it was not me. i heard them yell from across the field where i was helping feed horses.
in the middle of the second night the counselors took us to a giant rock in the middle of the bush where u could see the stars and it was amazing you could see the milky way and everything… but the thing was we had to spend the previous 20 minutes in the dark to get our eyes used to it so they had us hold onto each other’s sleeves and walk blindly into this rugged, rock-covered trail through pitch blackness, praying no one in front is going the wrong way
and then. the counselors played a trick on us by getting one of the kids to stay back in the forest and waited to see how long we’d notice. we didn’t notice until it was time to go back im so sorry Kimmy
Survival
ok this the real shit you went with the same group you were with in pre-survival and the counselors drove you out into the depths of the outback and dropped you and your group off with some tools, food, and tarpauline
and then u just lived out there for three days.
we couldn’t start a fire our first night because it’d been raining before??? our dinner was supposed to be rice, potatoes and carrots, and the carrots were the only edible thing bc u cant eat raw rice and raw potatoes.. u just cant.
there were wild dogs around. we never saw them, but we heard them awoo-ing a lot. so whenever someone split off from the main camp to go pee like two other girls would accompany them as an honor guard, singing Kumbaya to keep the hounds away
sometimes people would go alone and then there would be a Sound in the bush and then you’d just hear them screaming “MAMA’S MAKING KAN TONG”
on our last day the counselors set up targets with drawings of kangaroos on them, handed us a bow and 20 arrows, and said “if u can shoot the kangaroo we’ll give u sausages for your last meal”
never in my life will i ever see such ferocity from 12- to 13-year-old hungry girls again
when it was another group’s turn to be on survival, my group was on normal farm duty, and we were out clearing bush scrub when we heard the survival group girls talking and we realised we’d gotten too close.
“hello?? hello??? is anyone out there?” “oh my god someone’s out there oh my god we’re gonna die” “COME OUT, WE HAVE WEAPONS”
THIS WAS A LIE. WE KNEW DAMN WELL THEY HAD THE SAME THINGS AS US AND THOSE THINGS WERE TWO SHOVELS AND A HEAVY DUTY CLIPPER.
and our fucking counselor just went “shhh!!” to us and herded us back like he just straight up left those nine girls thinking there were bush serial killers out for them
also apparently a tree fell on someone’s head at some point in their survival
at night we slept in a row like snuggling each other cause it was So Fracking Cold and lemme tell u it’s an experience being spooned by the girl who used to sigh whenever you raised your hand in class
Four Day Hike
what it says on the label
55km in four days, carrying all your food, sleeping bags, tents, clothes, toilet paper etc. and minimum 2L of water bottles you could refill at big barrels set out at designated stop points
this is, without a doubt, the single worst experience of my life
nothing good happens when u hand a group of kids a map and a compass and tell them “we’ll look for you if you’re not at the campsite by sundown but apart from that you’re on your own”
i was with an athletic group of kids?? they were Walking So Fast and i was just staggering along with my unfit friend like this is how i die on a godforsaken hill on our way to god knows where
actually i had an asthma attack and they left me behind for a bit fun times
the hike went through some willing farmers’ land and one boy who stupidly climbed a fence got chased by a bull
they sent us off group by group so we’d all make our own way, so whenever u bumped into another group you were like. okay one of us was going the wrong way and it better fucking well be you
there weren’t any showers or anything so we basically all wore the same clothes for four disgustingly sweaty days of hiking
someone used an anthill as a toilet bc it had a nice big hole to drop ur toilet paper down
the ants did not appreciate this
when you run out of toilet paper and it’s only 11am
Solo
this was it. the culmination of the camp. the ultimate character building experience.
which was just 24 hours of alternating boredom and sudden visceral terror now that i think about it
u got dropped off (again in the middle of nowhere see a theme yet) with tarp, a lil trowel, and a clipper, and u just set up camp and did whatever u wanted for 24 hours
they let u bring a bible.
i got really into Leviticus and Deutoronomy before it went dark
listen it was really really boring ok
AND HERE IT IS THE BIT WHERE I DIDN’T HAVE LIGHT WHILE CAMPING ALONE
listen when the sun goes down at 5pm, u go down too. there’s nothing else u can do?? u just gotta sleep???
or, like me, lie awake in mortal terror listening to the bush Come Alive
when the wallaby goes THUMP-THUMP-THUMP and you’re like holy shit this is it the abominable loch ness chupycabra has manifested in the australian outback and it’s going to eat me alive jesus christ protect me with the power of this bible
hence the sheer relief when the sun finally comes out and u can walk around without living in fear of accidentally walking face first into a spiderweb or scratchy lantana bushes
also a mini survey went around afterwards and i’m pretty sure a solid 60% of the girls took a shit on solo like… at long last u can take as long in the toilet as u want… without the other 27 girls banging on the door……
other miscellaneous stories that dont fit anywhere else:
one of the boys went missing?? he wandered off and couldn’t remember anything when they found him in the middle of the bush. cryptic
there was this one homesick girl who was REALLY homesick like she cried every day of the five weeks. by the end of the camp she’d approached everyone to talk about her Feelings and you’d just kind of groan softly when u saw her coming towards your bunk bc u knew u were in for a hopeless comforting session
on sundays sometimes we went to the nearby town’s elderly home to talk to the old folks and some of us could play music so we did little performances for them which was rly sweet!
there were lambs on the farm!! we named them Uggboot and i think Fleece Jacket or smth like that
there were cows too!! meat cows!! they were Breakfast, Lunch, and Dinner
my first time on cow milking duty i tried to herd the bull towards the milking pens bc i did not realise he was not a cow. i quickly realised when he took very fast steps towards me and i Got The Dodge Out Of There
we spit roasted an entire pig for the final feast before we left and i will never forget it. the first time in my life i had crackling. half the group was weak in the knees cause we saw the pig get slaughtered and the other half was just “sweet, more for me”
whenever the new fruit delivery came in and the hunger games commenced in the kitchen… tween girls are actually ravenous wolves u heard it here first folks
when u going to the bathroom in the bush and u feel something touch your butt… is it a stray hair? is it a piece of grass? is it a bug??? who knows but nothing makes your bowels loosen faster
the unholy horror of finding spiders wherever you least expect it
ANTS IN THE SUGAR
“I saw Goody Proctor with the devil leaving the cupboard open for the ants!!!”
honestly so many things happened at Hell Camp that i can’t remember most of them anymore and it Rankles Me bc i know there were so many wild stories but here you go. some of the wildest ones.
11/10 went back to Hell Camp voluntarily once, would go back again again.
#velter answers#this took so long but is it worth it??? yes absolutely#Anonymous#hell camp#i went back to tag this just for future reference#my memories grow fuzzier by the day... hell camp deserves preservation
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Creative Non-Fiction, Caleb’s Portfolio
Carl
I’m pretty sure that everyone has that one friend. Yes, THAT one friend. That one friend you just can’t live without. To me, that friend is named Carl. We don’t go way back in preschool, or elementary, we met in Middle school. I keep saying that we met in Seventh grade, and he argues that it was actually Sixth grade. We both have terrible memories. But it doesn’t matter when we met, I’m just glad that we’re friends now.
During the time before I met Carl, I had no friends. A loner who couldn’t decide where to sit, and doesn’t wanna sit alone. But there was a table that was full of guys that I sat with, and they were always in a Yo Mama fight. I only knew a couple, but I laid low, but that didn’t work when it was my turn, and I was obviously terrible at it. I ran away from that table into a different table with a two guys who looked like a fluffy marshmallow and a skinny twig. I was there for about a week, then the next week came by and then that fluffy marshmallow came over to me (yea, that was Carl). The skinny friend of his moved from a different school district, and Carl had no one left, and he made the chance to say “Hi,” and said that I seemed cool. Essentially, I met my closest friend from running away from a Yo Mama fight.
From there, we started to hang out frequently. We shared the same interests in video games and wanting to create a Youtube channel together. We enjoyed playing the living crap out of Dragon Ball Z Budokai 3. In fact, I was the one who got him into Dragon Ball Z, which was really surprising that he didn’t like the show because that was my childhood (I still thank my older brother from teaching me very well to this day). When we wanted to be in the pool, obviously I would see his fat gut with stretch marks reaching up to his chest, and then he said, “These aren’t stretch marks, these are my lightning tattoos!” There was a reason why I called him a fluffy marshmallow, and he’s the best tall, fluffy marshmallow to me.
If we stayed over the night, we would stay up for a long time until it was 2am or sometimes later. But when we went to bed, we would actually have deep, meaningful talks.. And then it would end in complete laughter. One of those times would have been the story of Captain Rainbow. I was on the couch and he was in his bed, talking about our existence, the universe, god, etc. Until we finally started talking about games that were never localized outside of Japan. That game was Captain Rainbow. Then Carl showed me the box art of the game. Then I replied, “Captain Rainbow? Huh, I thought be’d be more pink.” (Essentially if you don’t get enough sleep, you’re practically drunk). He then began laughing, and said, “It’s Captain rainbow! He represents all the colors of the rainbow, and pick isn’t even on the rainbow!” Oh the wonders and joys of being tired.
There was a story that happened to him, and he told me in great detail. I knew that Carl was a very avid gamer, he especially loves the series called Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney. On Christmas Eve of 2015, he and his dad went to a Gamestop to buy me a gift, and to take advantage of the sales. One of the games that he was looking for was Professor Layton vs. Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney. Unfortunately, they didn’t have it which made Carl a little upset. But after celebrating New Year's with me, they looked up where the game was at, Sturgis. Carl and his dad jumped into the truck and went on their little adventure. But first, they stopped at a gas station. While Carl was getting gummy worms off the shelf, he noticed that there was a large selection of Alcohol at the end of the aisles. After getting back into the truck, Carl and his dad talked about that. “They must have alcohol there so that when terrible parents bring their kids, the little shits can get candy and the parents get alcohol because they don’t want to take care of their kids.” Down the road while he was eating his gummy worms, they collaborated into making, “Where the Fuck you’re at Scale.” This is how it worked.
“The top of the scale is City, the big city areas like Battle Creek or Grand Rapids. Next is Town, the basic small town areas. Then there’s Village, areas like Richland. After that, is Farm Country. Farm Country is rural areas with barns and lots of animals. And then there’s Country, areas with few houses and people. But then there’s B.F.E. (stands for Butt Fuck Nowhere)(I know it should be BFN, but that’s how Carl said it). No houses, middle of nowhere. Second to last is the Echolands. That’s when it’s so quiet and there’s no one around your voice echoes. Finally, theres *Banjo Music.* When the sound of a banjo breaks through the silence. If you are in the area, RUN. Even if your buddy is taking a shit on the side of the road get him in the car and drive. It’s ok if he shits in your car, because that banjo is usually followed by creepy old men with missing teeth, deep country accents and will more then likely, rape your booty hole.”
After all the hilarity, they finally made it the Gamestop in Sturgis, getting the game another another Ace Attorney game. So on the way home, Carl and his dad had even more fun. The first thing they saw was a grody looking motel. The sign out front said, “stay and get a free show.” While it may have meant a movie or something, the first thing that came to their minds was something else, something completely different. Carl said “ Is that free show a hooker? Imagine some guy passing through needing a place to stay for the night and the front desk worker says here’s your room key, that’s Candy she’ll be staying with you tonight.” The next building they saw was a one-room schoolhouse building with a graveyard. “That’s creepy.” Carl stated. “Probably the dead bodies of all the naughty kids!” Carl’s dad laughed. At the end of their adventure, Carl and his dad ate dinner at Fazoli’s and made their way home. Carl really enjoyed his games and they still treasure this road trip today. Holy crap, what a story he told me, I wish I was with him on that adventure.
I can guarantee that Carl will not change for when he gets older. We’ve already made some plans about living together and owning a house and paying off some bills and other expenses. By then, we’ll have jobs and a youtube channel that makes money as well. We hope to get a lot of cash and hopefully live our lives. Even when he’s older, he’ll still be that fluffy marshmallow I knew years ago, maybe with some facial hair too and a whole lot more funnier.
These are some the fantastic stories I have to share about my closest friend, Carl. I honestly can’t live without that big fluffy marshmallow, he’s too awesome. We’ll still get drunk from staying up at 2am, we’ll still play games and have a blast. I will definitely know that we will still be together, and become the weirdest and craziest granddaddy’s of that age.
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