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bearsbeetsbeskar · 1 year

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Restoring the Roots (Joel Miller x Therapist! reader)

Chapter 1: Pre-Contemplation

Chapter 2 here | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | main masterlist |

Pairing: Joel Miller x therapist! reader, post outbreak Rating: none, will be changed to explicit in future chapters (slow burn, eventual smut, age gap) Summary: Life after moving to Jackson looks drastically different for Joel, survival mode is over and now he and Ellie can finally put down new roots. Ellie adapts easily but Joel finds himself struggling to settle into this new life, in more ways than some. At Ellie and Tommy’s insistence, Joel begrudgingly finds himself in therapy to try and work through his struggles but what he encounters is more than just painful memories and deeply rooted trauma. A/N: I cannot say enough thank you's to the number of lovely humans who encouraged this idea and supported me as I embark on my very first fic! And what better Pedro character to be the guinea pig for this idea? Lots of this story draws on my personal knowledge as a social worker, as I am working towards becoming a certified equine assisted therapist. Consequently, there are lots of horsey terms, therapy terms, and vivid descriptions of trauma at certain points. Feel free like, comment, or reblog if you enjoy it :)

Taglist (for now): @beskarandblasters, @pr0ximamidnight, @theewokingdead, @atinylittlepain, @prolix-yuy, @swiftispunk, @harriedandharassed, @amywritesthings

If anyone wants to be on the taglist please let me know! If you don't want to be on it then also let me know lol.

~~~~~~~

You sat up taller in your chair, arching your back and rolling your shoulders in an effort to stretch out your spine, exhaling softly as you heard the cacophony of crunches and protests from your muscles. You had been hunched over your notepad for over an hour, eyebrows scrunched together and your mind running on autopilot, as you caught up on client notes that you had fallen behind on for the last couple days. The downside of having a small therapy practice, hell any therapy practice, was that there was a never ending litany of documentation to fill out. Seeing as you were the only therapist in the tiny commune of Jackson, there was never a shortage of clients and consequently, never a shortage of session notes that you had to write.

“Hun.”

You hear your name spoken in a warm tone from behind you. You barely look up from the page as you try to rewrite the word ‘diagnosis’ after what feels like the fifth time. The word has basically lost all its meaning at this point.

“Honey, c’mon, the sun is about ready to set and you can wrap that up tomorrow.” The cover page to the notepad closes on top of your hand and you look up to see your assistant, Tracey, giving you a knowing look and then glancing towards the front of the office. You follow her gaze to the front windows and take in the deep ember orange hue washing over the business faces and windows on the opposite side of the street, signaling the end of another day. Sighing softly, you lean back in your chair and cross your arms over your chest with a frown. You know she’s right and yet you still have the same dispute every day.

“Trace, you and I both know that if I don’t get them done today, they will just be added to tomorrow’s to do list, besides this is the last one I swear,” you say to her with a smirk, as if she has not heard that excuse before.

You were never the kind of person to half-ass your responsibilities at your job, including client documentation, even if there was no longer any governing body or association to uphold professional social work standards. You did your job with integrity, even the mundane administrative tasks that involved more writing than actual talking with clients. Tracey knew this of course, it was something she admired about you, how suited you were for this line of work. It was clear that you cared deeply for the clients that you supported. But it doesn’t mean it was not a fight when the end of the workday rolled around and she had to tear you away from your desk and practically shove you out of the office door.

She rolled her eyes at you and her lips curled into a small smile as she headed towards the door with her coat and bag in tow. “Promise me you will at least be out of here before the night patrol starts?” She points her finger at you as she stops just ahead of the door. You nod and wave her off as you turn your focus back to the notepad, smoothing your palm over the words etched into the cover ‘Restorative Reins.’

You had only been in Jackson for roughly over a month, though it felt like much longer. Much like everyone else who had survived the outbreak and came to find refuge in the small settlement after the world went to shit, you were grateful to accept any basic decencies of normal life that were afforded to you. Warm meals, warm showers, hell running water in general was a miracle in and of itself at that point. So when you actually arrived in Jackson, you were dumbfounded to see how much normalcy surrounded you. Children running and playing in the streets, storefronts of various thriving businesses, sheep being rounded up in a nearby corral - hold on, a fucking MOVIE THEATER?

While it took some time to grow out of the perpetual fight or flight mode that you were entrenched in from life on the road, you did eventually fall into a good pace in Jackson. Especially after getting involved in the community and taking up the job as the local therapist, you had never been busier, and you loved it.

The world felt unflinchingly obsolete post outbreak, but being able to support others with their mental health never failed to bring you joy and an unshakeable sense of purpose. You wanted to help others as they navigated their pain and broke down the mental blocks that entrapped them in their trauma. You wanted to help them realize the innate strength that they possessed. Sadly, you never got the chance to practice long term, as you finished up grad school just before the outbreak happened. But that didn’t seem to matter now as you had an endless stream of community members that you saw on a weekly basis at your practice, all with their own pain and struggles, seeking support.

It was crazy to think about the short period of time that had passed since you started at the job, how much you had done for the residents, how much more that you wanted to do. You were pulled from your memories when the office phone rang, internally groaning as you looked at your watch.

4:58 p.m. Of course.

Steeling yourself you picked up the phone, praying that it was a quick call.

“Restorative Reins Practice, how can I help you?” you answered.

“Oh! hi ma'am,” a warm, mellow Southern drawl greets you on the other end. “Are you the local therapist that has been helpin’ folks out around here with their mental health?”

"That's me,” you reply warmly, “what can I do for you?”

The man hesitates briefly, “Well, I was uh wanting to know a bit more about the business I guess, how the therapy process works, fees and stuff for someone who was interested in getting help. Not me though, it’s not for me, it’s for my brother, Joel. My name is Tommy by the way,” he mentions quickly.

“No problem Tommy, I can explain the basics to you including the different types of therapy I offer and how the process works,” you reassure him. You explain to him the different services, how the equine therapy worked, walk in hours, session lengths and so on.

“I should probably mention that my brother ain’t keen on getting help and reaching out to others when he needs it, he’s too damn proud to acknowledge it, so he really doesn’t think he has any issues and thinks everything is fine… but he’s having a real tough time settlin’ down here. He’s so haunted by his past and he’s been acting differently lately, more temperamental, well, more than usual,” Tommy adds. You smile to yourself and nod, as you’ve had many clients before who were stuck in similar struggles and closed off to therapy initially.

“I can definitely understand that,” you sympathize with him. “It sounds like your brother has been through a lot and you just want him to get some support, which is great. Therapy isn’t for everybody but I have worked with many individuals like him who were going through similar situations, and they found great success.”

“That’s great to hear. That’s all I want for him is to get some help,” Tommy states.

“Now with that being said,” you continue, “therapy is voluntary, I cannot force someone to attend, but if your brother would agree to a consultation with me, I could chat with him more about where he is at, the kind of support he could benefit from and go from there. No pressure to commit to anything,” you propose to him.

“Hmm, I think he could be persuaded to try that, now that you mention it like that,” Tommy chuckles, sounding pleasantly surprised.

“Awesome! You can tell him to stop by the office any time and we can discuss it more. We’re open from 9-5,” you tell him, silently relieved that it was an indeed quick call. He thanks you and hangs up.

Something else akin to curiosity creeps into your mind as you recount what Tommy briefly told you about his brother. Maybe more so intrigue. You wonder how resistant he is to therapy, what happened in his past to hurt him so deeply, but you catch yourself before your thoughts run away from you further, either way you look forward to helping another person in need.

~~~~~~~~~~~

“Tommy, I swear to god if you bring up this damn therapy shit again, I won’t hesitate to shoot you next time we’re out on patrol,” Joel growled through clenched teeth, as he walked away from his brother into the kitchen of the house.

“Boy, it ain’t like I never heard that before,” Tommy quipped sarcastically, rolling his eyes as he followed Joel into the kitchen, pausing in the doorway as he leaned against the frame, hands shoved into his pockets. He observed his brother's rigid stance, the tightness in his shoulders, as Joel stood over the sink, looking out the window.

This felt like the umpteenth time that Tommy had broached the subject of Joel getting help and talking to a ‘shrink,’ as he dismissively described it, for the issues that he was struggling with. Joel was fine. He didn’t have any fucking issues. He was doing just fine and didn’t need some professional to scrutinize him, reduce him to his vices, and open old wounds from his past life. He was encouraged to go to grief counseling after Sarah died but by some grace of God, or whatever godforsaken omnipotent entity existed at that point, the outbreak occurred. Forget mental health, physical health and survival became the only focus.

Tommy exhaled softly. “Listen, I'm only suggestin’ it because I care about you. Ellie cares about you. You both have been through hell and back in the last year, I mean shit, we all have. But it seems like everything y’all went through is still affecting you, holding you back from letting your guard down and settling in here,” he states plainly, sadness lacing his tone.

“That’s bullshit Tommy and you know it,” Joel snaps, turning to face his younger brother and leaning back against the counter, arms crossed in defense. His gaze narrows. “I go out on patrol don’t I? Pick up extra shifts wherever it’s needed, help out with the contracting jobs, go out with Ellie in town.” Joel stood up taller, puffing out his chest, challenging his younger brother. Tommy shook his head, running his hand over his face with an exasperated expression. Heaven forbid Joel did anything for himself that did not involve contributing or providing for someone, period. He just couldn’t shake that from his identity, and it broke Tommy’s heart as he watched his brother’s stubborn pride, ridden with guilt and trauma, swallow him whole.

“Man when are you gonna fuckin’ do something for yourself Joel?!” Tommy asserted, his frustration reaching a boiling point. “Forget the damn commune, forget the community, forget Ellie for a sec and think about the last time YOU did something for yourself, the last time YOU reached out for help goddamnit.” He pushed off the doorframe and crossed the threshold of the kitchen as he strode towards Joel.

“You’re not on the run anymore brother. You don’t have to just survive. You can have a life here. You can sleep without keepin’ one eye open and relax without lookin’ over your shoulder. Don’t you want that? Don’t you think you deserve that?! Don’t you think you deserve this?!” Tommy said as he gestured around the cozy kitchen and fixed his older brother with a pleading stare.

Joel’s eyes widened as he tried to step back, the edge of the counter biting into his lower back as he took in Tommy’s weary face, the pain in his soft brown eyes, mirroring his own. His younger brother rarely raised his voice anymore. The outbreak took its toll on his hot headed temperament that never seemed to simmer down, even after he was discharged from the army. Joel knew that Tommy cared about him, hell he knew how deeply his brother loved him, after all they had respectively been through in the last twenty years, it had to be serious for him to raise his voice.

Joel opened his mouth, ready to bite back but his brother raised his hands in the air in surrender, “Look, this is the last time I will bring this up, I swear. But yesterday I called up the therapist in town who’s been helpin’ folks out, and asked her about the therapy process and she seems real nice, and supportive. She said you could come in for a consultation and talk to her and see if you’re interested,” Tommy said quietly.

Joel’s gaze narrows as he scrunches his eyebrows together in incredulity, “You-”

“I had nothing to lose Joel. Absolutely nothing. And neither do you,” Tommy cuts him off, raising his chin in defiance. “At least go talk to the therapist, if you don’t like her or you’re not feelin’ it, then I’ll drop it and let it go. Okay? The office is on the main street, just beside the clothing store, adjacent to the stables and they’re open everyday from 9-5.”

“Jesus fucking Christ Tommy,” Joel leaned back as he looked up at the ceiling, wishing it would collapse in on him. Gotta love that brotherly love.

“Look I should be getting back now, Maria will be waiting for me. Here’s the number and address for the business. I’ll see you around okay?” Tommy patted through his pockets and retrieved a small piece of paper with writing scribbled on it, placing it on the counter beside Joel. He gave him a last placating look before he walked out of the kitchen, the front door closing behind him with a soft click.

Joel pinched the bridge of his nose and exhaled sharply before turning back around to look out the kitchen window. He hung his head in defeat, rounding his back as he rested his elbows on the counter and glared into his matte reflection in the sink. He didn’t need any help. He was doing fine. He’s still upright and breathing, with blood coursing through his veins isn’t he? Albeit, he's not jumping out of bed like a sprightly thirty year old anymore. His knees pop and crackle when he gets up from crouching over machinery for too long, his joints protest the next day when he pushes himself too far, moving slower than usual on job sites.

Hell, even his memory is starting to get cloudy around the edges. If it weren’t for Ellie some days, he’s sure he would leave the house without pants on, what with her always reminding him where things are in the house, special events that are coming up in the community that he forgets about. He had been a bit more snappy than usual, as Ellie so lovingly pointed out one day, but that’s nothing compared to his normal demeanour.

“You’re becoming a grumpy motherfucker y'know that? Jeez, who shit in your cornflakes this morning?” She grumbled at him with a mouth full of cereal, after he snapped at her reminder that it was parent day at the local school. Parent day, P.A. day, Joel hadn’t dealt with any of this shit in over twenty years since Sarah was in school. Even then he managed to swiftly neglect many of the parental events, seeing as Sarah was the perfect student, with nothing but glowing reviews from her teachers. The fact that Ellie was going to school amidst a fucking apocalypse was enough for Joel to be content.

But still, he’s doing fine, right? Just fine.

“Maybe talking to someone that’s not related to you would help you, y’know? Being able to talk about shit that you can’t talk to me, or Tommy, or anyone else about you know?” Ellie proposed to him later that night.

As luck would have it, she was already home when Joel and Tommy spoke in the kitchen and she had heard pretty much the entire conversation. And like Tommy, she only wanted Joel to get support because she cared about him.

“Think of all the shit that we went through in the past year, forget the infected, and the raiders, and FEDRA, and almost dying,” she casually listed off on one hand as if she was reciting a grocery list.

“There's so much shit that we’re both carrying with us, demons from our past, and it’s gotta come out one way or another. Look, therapists aren’t there to judge you, or analyze you,” she continued, “they’re kind of like a sounding board for you to bounce your thoughts off of, and they help you process shit you’re going through. You never know unless you try it,” she said matter of factly.

“Like Tommy said, you got nothing to lose man. Plus the whiskey and pills will only help you numb reality for so long, you’re gonna go insane eventually,” she said, fixing him with a knowing look as she leaned back into the couch beside him.

Joel just grunted in response and frowned. Damn this kid for being too insightful for her own good.

Ellie might be young but she most certainly wasn’t naive. And as much as Joel would have liked to assume that her easy transition into life in Jackson was on account of her youthfulness, it really wasn’t. It was just the fact that she had never known a normal life, as heartbreaking as that was. She never had the chance to experience such normalcy before everything turned on its head. But she developed friendships with a few of the other teens in the community, namely one girl Dina, who she hung out with after school, went to the movies and other community events with.

She didn’t have to actively try to fit into Jackson, she just did. Joel would never acknowledge the pangs of jealousy he felt gnawing at his insides when he saw her getting on so well, but it didn’t mean they chipped away at his morale any less.

Ellie smirked at his lack of response, knowing he was mulling it over in his mind. With the relationship they had developed over the past year, she was grateful to be able to talk to Joel and actually get through to him.

“Damn maybe I should be a fuckin’ therapist, that was good advice wasn’t it?” she grinned at him, elbowing him in his side.

Joel snorted and shook his head. “Christ, I must be losing my mind for real this time if you’ve got me considering it.”

“Now c’mon,” she wiggled her eyebrows at him, “you owe me at least a few games of Boggle for that pep talk,” she said triumphantly, holding up the weathered board game that was on the coffee table.

#joel miller x reader #joel miller x female reader #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x therapist! reader #joel miller x you #joel miller smut #joel miller fanfiction #the last of us fanfiction #tlou fanfiction #joel miller #the last of us #tlou #the last of us hbo #equine assisted therapy #equine therapy

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roses-dreams-andthorns · 1 year

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Can i request the Mafia fish with Introvert!reader who’s rarely interact with people and they found out that they’re reader’s muse for painting art bcus all reader can think about is them HSSBSJA

I CRAVE FLUFF TO SLEEP PEACEFULLY

Mafia fish it is!! hehehe

GN! Reader

Floyd

He's quite scary to you, since he's so extroverted, and he's so engergetic, while you're just a silent, no energy person. He likes to sqeeze you quite often, so often you've begun to recognize his footsteps. Though he may be scary, you can't seem to get him off your mind, so... you make him your little guinea pig. He gets to sqeeze you? You get to use him as an art guinea pig, fair is fair, after all. Of course, you weren't gonna announce to him that he's your art guinea pig, who knows what he'd do to you...

"Whatcha drawing shrimpy-chan?" He suddenly said from behind you. He had entered your art room without you noticing, and now you've got yourself in a sticky situation, looking at him with a half shocked, half terrified look on your face. He laughs at you.

"Awww shrimpy! don't be scared! I just wanna see! Is that me?" he asks, you turn away and slowly nod, and he sqeezes you as if it were his last day on earth.

"Awwww! Shrimpy!!! You drew meeeee!" he laughs, you cough from how he's sqeezing you, and he puts you down.

You stay silent for a moment, before silently speaking, "W-well... you get to sqeeze me all the time, so.... its only fair if I get to use you as my art guinea pig in exchange..." He laughs.

"Hahahaha! Shrimpy is so funny!" he smiles with his sharp teeth, "Can I watch you draw??" He asks, you nod slowly, making him jump slightly in happiness, "yaaaay!"

Jade

Like Floyd, he's also scary to you, he's not the type of person you'd wanna get in the bad side of, though most of the time you avoid him, you do see him in the halls once in a while, and when you do, he gives you a smile that looks nice, but probably has some sinister plan underneath that has you involved. even though you've only seen him those few times, and how scary he is, you can't seem to get him out of your head, so you tend to draw him often, very regular, gentlemanly poses, nothing strange.

"an exquisite painting of me you've done, darling." you hear his voice linger behind you, making you jump, with a slight "eep!" escaping your mouth, he chuckles softly

"No need to be afraid... I quite like it." he says, smiling. you silently ask "Really?" he chuckles again.

"but of course, never had I seen someone as talented in art as you... This is because I was on your mind, yes?" he asked, dang... he caught you red handed.

Azul

Ah, yes, Azul Ashengrotto. Despite his powerful reputation as the owner of Monstro Lounge and dormleader of Octavinelle, you find him quite pretty, you two have some of the same classes together, and sometimes you can't help but secretly stare at him, you sometimes have a tendancy to draw him in your sketchbooks, in fact, 50% of your most recent sketchbook is filled with drawings of him, little notes on the drawings like "Pretty..." or "He's very cool..."

Though you haven't interacted often, he seems knows you quite well, which scares you, because, well... What if he finds your sketchbook? What will he say about all the drawings of him that are there? Would he think you're creepy? It's something you panic about almost everyday.

Your favorite place to draw is in the bontanical garden, because its just so pretty there... you sigh, as even when Azul isn't in seeing distance, you still can't seem to get him out of your head, his eyes, glasses, face, hair, personality... its all stuck in there like it was superglued in there, so you draw him. You don't draw anything strange, of course, you only draw him normally, sometimes doing full body, sometimes doing bust-up drawings... and you even draw little chibis too.

"How cute..." you hear a familiar voice behind you, causing you to jump, immediately holding your sketchbook in your arms and turning to see the person behind you. and of course... It was none other than the person you were just drawing, Azul Ashemgrotto. You enter a state of panic, 'what's he gonna say??? What do I do????'

He laughs lightly, "No need to panic, I don't bite." he says, "I simply came to admire your art, the drawings you do of me are always quite amazing."

And that didn't help calm down your panic, you ushered a small "Y-you saw them?" with a stuttered, quite and soft voice, clearly shaking.

He smiles, "Yes, I did, but I really like your drawings, I'm... actually flattered you think I'm so pretty..." he says, his face turning a bit red from blush, and his voice going softer, as you your eyes, as you stop panicing, you ask him softly "so you... don't find it weird...?"

"Of course not... It... actually makes me quite happy... But please don't tell Floyd and Jade or anyone I said that! They'd tease me mercilessly..." he said as he sighed, you chuckle a bit.

"Hehehe... I won't... And... I'm... glad you like my drawings..." you say quietly with a smile.

#twisted wonderland #disney twst #azul ashengrotto #azul ashengrotto x reader #floyd leech #floyd leech x reader #jade leech x reader #jade leech #fish mafia

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seraphsfire · 9 months

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Life situation & kitty update! Help me stay in Seattle instead of being forced to go to wyoming

Hello! I was able to make rent this month, but so far I cannot make rent for next month.

Ko-fi has been holding donations since paypal has been flagging them as "income" so that no longer works.

If you would like to help me out using paypal, the link is HERE. I will look into other venmo and cashapp. you can also reach out for a commission! If you donated via paypal and would like me to draw you a little something in thanks, please let me know!

I also put together an AMAZON WISH LIST , most is things for the kitties or food and some non-essentials / self care things for the hell of it that are things i haven't been able to buy myself for a while. Other than rent, kitty supplies and food are what I spend most $ on.

More on what I'm facing and what my kitties need:

about the kitties:

My sweet kitty Jade, needs a steroidal shot for her dermatitis. She should have gotten another one on the 25th, but I had no money to take her to the vet and she started ripping her fur out and made big, golf-ball sized spots completely bald on her armpit and chest :'( We put her on benadryl, moisturized her, and gave her a little jacket thing to help but I can tell she's really uncomfortable and really needs a vet visit to get that. it's $80 just to visit my vet and i'm sure the shot could be anywhere from 10-40 dollars, I really don't know. She's not in danger of pulling huge chunks of fur out thanks to the little jacket but she's really not happy and it makes me so sad.

About my situation (kind of long, sorry):

My Parents (mostly my mom; it's very hard to get responses from my dad) gave me rent money for September, but then made it clear that she will no longer help me financially under any circumstance if I want to "choose" to live in Seattle, then I'm essentially on my own. She doesn't want to give me money because she doesn't want ours to be a "transactional-based relationship" (after spending my entire childhood having them pressure me to move out on my own)

My dad is convinced that since Seattle is a city, it is very unsafe (and too full of Democrats) and that we would be safer living in their small town of Pavilion, Wyoming--which is literally just like, a few very spaced out neighborhoods. The nearest actual town is a 30 minute drive, and it's not very big either, and I don't drive. I would be snowed in *with them* for 4+ MONTHS every year, and every summer unable to leave the house for weeks because of the heat.

My dad has told my sister and I that if we choose to live right next to them, where they could have complete control over our lives, they would even buy us a house--but because we're not doing that, they refuse to support us in the life we've chosen for ourselves. They do not see the cruelty in this and think we are being nonsensical staying somewhere like Seattle which is "dangerous" and they do not like that it is full of non-republicans. I came out as queer in 2016, something which they have never spoken about since. I would likely be the only (out) queer person for MILES, and I don't feel like being the guinea pig for whether the anti-gay people there are the kind who ignore you or the kind who will hatecrime/kill you (:

Since I'd be at zero in my bank account in wyoming, they would have complete control over what I eat (not fun since I have a messed up digestion), clothes I buy, where I go, and how I behave just like they did when I was a child, or they'll start taking things away hoping that "tough love" will work. (it just made me mentally ill lol)

If I start a job in a week and a half I might be okay, but if I can't start until after that I won't have enough for October rent. I have one interview coming up but the future is still very up in the air.

#people in need #signal boost #haha im scared #thank u

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exhaustedwriterartist · 1 month

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Ooohhh mannn. I'm dealing with bad imposter syndrome rn.

I want to post the comic soon, but school has been a bit of a set back for that. Thank you for your patience. <3

A little vent discussing OOH and just generalish stress about it below. (Please don't feel like you have to read this. It's just my brain spitting out some thoughts.)

I'm really worried about how OOH is going to go. I worried that some things will be ooc or will be plain dumb or cringe and I don't realize it. I'm probably worrying about nothing, but I'm still worried it will be a disappointment.

Man the bad thoughts and doubt are really trying to stress me out with this.

Besides that though, I'm also not how I should draw this comic. Should I do more my style, should this be fully colored, would it be ok if it was just one rendered page at the beginning and the end? I genuinely don't know what I should do and don't know how much I can handle drawing, because I have to keep in mind that I want to make this a full on comic.

I don't know what exactly brought on this stress, but it may be partly because I dumbly watched someone react to a fan fiction that was honestly no bueno (the fic had nothing to do with TMNT or anything with any fandom). But I think that has made me worry about my own fiction, and yeahhhh I shouldn't do this to myself it's not helping me.

It also probably because school and the things that need to be done before I graduate.

I feel like I want to discuss OOH with one of my moots though, just to make sure that the story ideas I have so far, because I will admit there is some improv going on, make sense and I would really appreciate some feedback.

Honestly any feedback on what I have posted so far would be very helpful at the moment.

Would any of my moots want to be a guinea pig for OOH? Things would be spoiled though. There is no pressure and I will probably delete this in a day or two.

Sorry for the vent. Thank you for reading this if you did.

#exhausted's half awake jumbles #I don't really feel like tagging OOH here.#My darn anxiety is at it again.#My brain is screaming at meeee.#I'll probably be off here until later in the evening #I need to finish some projects #love y'all <3

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imagine-knowing-a-name · 8 months

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Jeff Fictional Universe (JFU) Headcanons

A/N: Hi everyone! I'm on holiday at the moment and don't have too much time for writing, but my next fic is close to being finished and here's this in the meantime: it's a bunch of my headcanons about Jeff the Landshark that haven't explicitly made it into my JFU fics yet.

Send me an ask if you have any of your own headcanons about Jeff, I'd love to hear them and see if they'll fit into future stories! Have a good day y'all and I hope you enjoy!

Warnings: vague mentions of death, not proofread.

➼ Jeff was experimented on by MODOK. This one is pretty canon to Jeff’s official comics since MODOK officially created the land sharks, but in my mind, it went a lot deeper than that. Jeff doesn’t really remember any of it, nor does it affect him anymore, but he’ll still get a bit nervous in lab environments and snap at people who get too intrusive, even if he doesn’t know why he does that.

➼ He’s a mix of a bunch of animals – a shark most obviously, but he has the behaviour of dogs/cats and the toe count of guinea pigs, to name a few.

➼ Jeff understands every language, but he can only speak his own. He doesn’t expect anyone to speak his language because of this, but he can get frustrated that they don’t even understand his language. Especially with Natasha.

➼ When you first got the ability to speak to animals in the JFU, Jeff was the first animal you could understand, but you had gotten so used to answering Jeff’s mrrrs with random assumptions that you didn’t even notice. Jeff also didn’t notice because you had actually been fairly good at guessing what he wanted. It was only after a few days and a long speech by Jeff that you both had the moment of realisation.

➼ Jeff cannot read; you and Natasha have tried to teach him but to no avail. It became a challenge between the Avengers that anyone who teaches Jeff to read would win. Tony got closest to winning, but you later realised that Jeff was just reciting a section of the book which Tony had taught him to memorise, and he still couldn’t read anything else. Bruce decides that Jeff is just biologically incapable of reading full words.

➼ Despite this, Jeff can write a few short words/phrases; mainly his, yours, and Natasha’s names.

➼ Even if he can’t read words, Jeff understands all the letters of the alphabet individually and is convinced that the letter ‘E’ is written backwards (Ǝ). Any attempts to correct this are met with a scolding from that land shark and a lesson on how to ‘write it properly’.

➼ Somehow, Jeff has even set his phone keyboard to have a backwards E. Nobody is sure how he managed this, or even why he changed it, since he types in his own language and only uses the letters ‘m’ and ‘r’.

➼ He will sometimes ‘correct’ Natasha and your mission notes to have ‘the proper Ǝ’ because he doesn’t want you to look bad or be embarrassed. This leads to Maria Hill and Fury sometimes even writing their Es backwards since they’re so used to seeing it and reading it as if it were normal.

➼ On the topic of Jeff’s mental abilities: Jeff can only count to 4, since he has 4 fingers on his front hands (he only has 3 toes on his back feet, but that’s another matter – see ‘Class Pet’ for Jeff’s reaction to this information)

➼ If Jeff tries to count above 4, he reverts back to 1. This has led to some issues when you asked Jeff to scout out how many soldiers there were during a mission (Jeff had stowed away, but he was put to good(?) use). You went out expecting an easy fight, only to be confronted by 13 soldiers and a realisation that Jeff cannot count.

➼ There aren’t many foods that Jeff won’t eat; he’ll happily root through the trash for an extra snack, however, Natasha cooked for him once and that is where he draws the line. He immediately taught himself how to cook and he is excellent at it, and will often step in to cook when Natasha says she will (much to your relief). He is not so good at cleaning up after himself – but you leave that chore to Natasha.

➼ Sharks have some understanding of what Jeff is saying when he swims with them, but he has a ‘land accent’ and sometimes they find it easier for you to translate for Jeff, much to his annoyance.

➼ Jeff hopes to find other landsharks like him one day… little does he know that he’s the last of his kind. The others attacked civilians in an invasion orchestrated by MODOK and were put down by the Avengers; Jeff was saved by being the runt of the litter and was left in his cage rather than being sent out with the others.

400 year old Jeff headcanons (these aren’t all canon to the JFU, but it’s a fun version of Jeff that @wolferine and I brainstormed in discord.)

➼ Jeff is 400 years old but nobody believes him; they even go as far as to call him a baby constantly since his appearance has never changed.

➼ He was kicked out of the landshark group because he ate all their food. Jeff is exceptionally hungry for a landshark. He spent some time in the sea after that and befriended the oldest greenland shark, who was still just a pup like Jeff at the time.

➼ Jeff still goes to visit his friend from time to time, glad to have had someone with him for his whole existence.

➼ When you and Natasha take Jeff in, it is the first time in his 400 years of life where he has been content to settle with a family for their entire lifetimes. The Avengers promise that their children will look after Jeff when they’re gone, like a tortoise (once they realise Jeff isn’t a baby).

➼ Jeff replies to any scolding with ‘I’m older than you’ or ‘respect your elders’, much to Steve’s annoyance because that’s usually his line, but now he’s being called a youth by a tiny, round, short legged shark.

➼ The other Avengers expect Jeff to scold Thor when he comes to Earth and calls Jeff a baby on their first meeting, but to their surprise, he just accepts it. Jeff mentions later on that he met Thor roughly 350 years before during a battle on Earth. Thor doesn’t believe Jeff is that old until he finds a portrait of the battle back on Asgard, and spots a familiar landshark in the drawing; he still doesn’t believe it can be Jeff and assumes it is just Jeff’s ancestor, so Jeff bites him in annoyance – that spurs a memory and Thor suddenly realises that it was Jeff who fought in battle with him (because Jeff had accidentally bitten Thor in the heat of the battle, and he’s been bitten by so many creatures in his life that he instantly recognises the landshark bite.)

Jeff taglist: @unexpected-character @wolferine

#jeff the landshark #jeff the land shark #avengers fanfiction #reader insert #ikan writes #jeff the land shark & reader #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff x reader & jeff the land shark #marvel #mcu

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chipped-chimera · 3 months

Text

Today in fish nonsense! 🐟🐠- Tank is good to go! Cool wood piece is cleaned and time to spend way too long on a plan painting.

More below the cut.

Tank has been set up, leak tested so it's good to go (after I overhauled the layout of my office ... still dealing with the fallout of that though lol) and the piece of jarrah/mirra? wood that my Dad grabbed from the tree he cut down on a farm (noting this specifically because it's actually now illegal to commercially harvest Jarrah in my state - this was on private property so it's legal) has had the absolute crap scrubbed out of it - I mean literally, in the process I found yet another interesting hole in it so that's cool, then high-pressure blasted with water so I am finally ready to think about scaping.

Which apparently means spending longer than I should drawing a plan lol. This piece is super awkward to work with I think - while functionally interesting it has a silhouette that makes me oscillate between 'boring' and 'awkward'. After talking to some artist friends, generally it was agreed I'd need to put more stuff in there to actually make it look better, right now naked glass is super harsh. Problem is, rocks and wood? Well in the aquarium hobby that shit is expensive. We're talking 60 AUD+ for pieces of wood. I mean they are fully cleaned and treated (?) and selected for being interesting, but I have a budget and I'd like to save as much of it as I can for more than just harscape sooooo planning is just the right idea here.

Thinking seiryu stone because I looooove the white veining through it, and then for the branches to break up the shape it's probably going to be spiderwood or something (as much as I love mopani wood I don't think it usually sells branched like this - but I will watch out for it) but the good part is these pieces are all probably going to be on the smaller side since I have my huge hunk of feature wood for free.

I don't know how this piece of wood will interact with inhabitants, I've soaked it for probably a month at this point to get a large amount of the tannins out (and I know it waterlogs, which is great because I won't have to play 'how long will this take to sink') but also to help the looser material come off so all I'm left with now is the hard stuff. It's also now sitting in the sun (and I mean sun - it is going to be 40C today and the next few days so that shit is gonna bake 💀) but prior to that has been sitting in the sun either here or the farm for a total of about idk ... at least a month? Maybe more?

I've struggled to find information on whether Jarrah or Mirra wood is safe beyond one post on a forum where someone-who-knew-someone at a local fish shop had put a piece of this in his store tank and all the fish died. Beyond that? no more context. According to my freshwater ecologist friend I caught up with, she thinks it's probably going to be okay given the amount of time/work put in. I have not done a bleach soak and I don't think I really need to given the amount of time it's been soaking in regular tap water (so already contains chlorine) and sun exposure. There will still probably be tannin leakage into the water but I'm okay with having a mild blackwater tank after seeing one in my LFS, I actually like the slight tannin tint of water and how it makes everything a little 'softer'. But I do ACTUALLY want to be able to see though lmao. I've also seen Jarrah seed pods sold locally specifically for blackwater tank setups so it might be fine?

Either way the plan is going to be: Scape, plant, cycle and then introduction of some cheap shrimp as my poor guinea pigs to see if that wood actually is awful.

Right now I'll just have to painstakingly go through plant choices and placement and making sure it lines up with the planned parameters for the community. I absolutely will take suggestions btw.

More soon. Fish nonsense will contain fish ... at some point. I swear lmao.

#kerytalk #aquablr #fishblr #my art #I guess even though this is a grossly overconfident doodle #aquascaping #yes that is a sandpit for enrichment #though I'm debating corydoras #I worry tetras + corydoras might be too much schooling happening for the eventual last edition - Betta fish #if not then it'll be tetras + one pleco #... I swear I saw a video of a pleco thoroughly enjoying burrowing in sand - I'd love that #yes all of this is primarily because I want a betta #but if I only get one tank ... go hard or go home right?#ngl considering getting a small 5-10 gallon for my bedroom for shrimp breeding so that could be a feasible second plan #in case the betta is an asshole #do not tell my parents lmao #I'd love a male in the tank but know it's probably not going to work so female is more likely - or at least plakat type #it's got quite a bit of height to traverse so I don't think anything with super big fins would be great - especially with age #even if I basically have a stepped up network of holes in this wood right to where it nearly touches the surface

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chaoticgremlinbrainspace · 6 months

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I don't know if this is silly enough, or even really a prompt, but... how bout drawing a guinea pig :}

here you go anon :3 hee hee I looked up evil guinea pig for this feller (he forgot what they looked like and drew a lip monster)

hes a lil deflated looking dw about it tho

EDIT:I FOUND THE FUCKER GET SCHEDULED IDIOT I swear I know how to use Tumblr I lost a lot of my brain cells when I bathed in Windex

#grem doodle #guinea pig #grem responds #hee hee

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boxboxlewis · 2 years

Text

inspired by & drawn from a conversation with @accio-ricciardo. truly some incredible minds doing galex scholarship rn! we are blessed

"No, right, I get it," Alex says. "The Queen was..." There is a small pause while he considers exactly how far he's willing to compromise his principles in order to get his dick wet. Quite far, as it turns out. "The Queen was an incredible woman, and a very, um, long-standing pillar of the... international community." Certainly one way of putting it. "It's just, and I don't want to underplay her accomplishments here, but I'm not quite sure why that means we can't have sex?"

George lifts his head, and oh god his eyes are teary. Alex loves seeing George cry, but like: in a sex context. Not because he's having feelings about the fucking monarchy. "Seventy years, Alex," George says. His voice is hoarse. "Seventy years of service."

"Yes," Alex says. "That is... many years."

"Seventy years of self-sacrifice. Of putting her country first." George draws in a long, shuddering breath, and there it is, he's properly tearing up now. "This is the end of an era."

Alex steps forward and wraps his arms around George, because he's a good boyfriend who wants to comfort his partner in his time of emotional need. George turns his face into Alex's neck and they stand there for a moment, Alex holding him while he snuffles wetly.

Then George pulls back, disbelief writ large on his beautiful tear-stained face. "Mate, are you hard right now?"

"Um." Alex tries to look innocent. "Yes? But don't worry about it? Unless you want to worry about it." He discreetly adjusts his dick. "And actually, you know, thinking more, maybe this is a great opportunity to celebrate life. And the, the beautiful... circle... that is life. In a way, having sex now would be a celebration of Queen Elizabeth's reign." Alex is talking total shit, of course, but really it's George's fault, for looking like that and liking Alex's dick so much and generally making Alex insane.

George shakes his head. His expression is dispiritingly resolute. "No, Alex. I'm sorry, but it feels disrespectful. I think we need to observe the national period of mourning, and then we can." He clears his throat. "We can... resume, after the funeral."

"Ok, right, hang on, let me just—" Alex takes out his phone and does a quick search. "September 19th? Georgie, my dick will fall off. I'll shrivel into a husk. Do you want to be responsible for the total collapse of Williams's points-scoring hopes?"

"Alex." George sounds almost pitying. "It's not even two weeks. We've gone much longer than that without having sex."

"Yeah, but not when we're in the same place." Alex palms himself. He doesn't want to sound desperate, but he can't not have sex with George for ten days, that's absurd. "Look, how about—ok. What if I just jerk off on your tits?"

"No," George says firmly. "We'll wait until after the funeral."

"Can I jerk off while I lie next to you and you have your eyes closed?"

"Alex! We're in mourning."

Alex shuts his own eyes. For a moment, he finds himself genuinely considering meeting George where he lives and making a "why we should have sex even though the Queen is dead, and also, here's why colonialism is bad actually" PowerPoint.

@grievewatch on twitter is doing a stellar job of noting other things that are disrespectful While We Mourn. the list includes guinea pigs, food banks, and cancer surgery. love 2 live in a sane country!!!

#my fic #galex #the real tragedy is that the queen died before she could read this :(#gr63 #aa23

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klutzyroses · 1 year

Note

I hope you don’t mind but if you are still taking requests, I would love to see the ikevamp suitors react to chucky (you knowwww, the doll we all loveee!) Thank you so much!!

Good grief...I don't love that doll...

IkeVamp HCs: Meeting Chucky

How do they react to Chucky?

Suitors: Mozart, Isaac, Jean, Faust

Mozart

Oh, he absolutely loves Chucky! He can never get enough of him...

Not.

Don't bring that...that...thing! Near him!

He has no interest in it. He doesn't want to see it. He doesn't want to hear it.

If he sees Chucky, he is leaving.

No joke, he will leave the mansion. As in, he is moving out. And he is not coming back.

He won't be playing as often at night. Its off putting to him when that...doll is wandering around the house.

Isaac

.....Eh?

The physicist is torn between being petrified and being fascinated.

This is a walking, talking doll...an incredibly ugly walking, talking doll.

He almost wants to know how it works but...

When it looks in his direction, he decides, no.

He does not want to get to know it.

Jean

Kill it. Hang it. Slice it.

He is not interested in the doll in any other way than to see it perish.

Why has a demon been brought into the mansion? Is it Comte's doing? If it is...

He will leave the room if Chucky is in it. If he is forced to look at him, he will draw his sword.

Don't test him.

He will decapitate him if given a reason.

Faust

Interesting. What a curious little doll.

Honestly Faust is far from afraid of him. It's actually more accurate to say Chucky was afraid of him.

If he gets his hands on Chucky, he is as good as dissected.

He is disturbingly fascinated with this little creature. He simply must know more...

What is that scalpel for? No reason, he is just holding it for fun.

Chucky had better run because the good Docteur is on the hunt for a new guinea pig.

🌸

#ikemen vampire #ikevamp #ikevamp mozart #ikevamp isaac #ikevamp jean #ikevamp faust #ikevamp headcanons

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rickwardsinnerhands · 1 year

Text

Guinea Pig Plush Pattern!!

For the benefit of sewing community on tumblr I am putting up the pattern I made when I sewed some guinea pig plush recently (as a gift for my brother a proud guinea parent)

There will be instructions and I will also add a list of supplies at the end (with some prices and where I got them)

Here's the pattern to start with, it fits on a normal sized printer paper, so it should be fine to just pint out as is. (don't mind the holes, that's where my pins went in when I was cutting out pieces)

I used felt and it took me only one sheet to cut out the pattern if i was being careful (if not it took 2 XD)

more below the cut!!

first things first cut out your pattern! whatever colour you want piggy to be! (I always cut out the side piece first since you need two, I just folded the felt and cut it as close to the edge as possible, to give room for the other pieces you see.)

as you can see this is white and not yellow, sadly I only took progress pics of one of the guinea pigs I made so i'm using those ones here, hopefully this isnt too confusing.

next step is to sew on whatever patches/markings you want your piggie to have! this piggie ultimately has two black patches on her face and a brown patch on her butt. to make these markings, I used the side pattern and cut out a whole side piece that I then trimmed to my desired size (if you have chalk it's so helpful for sketching things out.)

remember to keep in mind where the ears need to go! I got the ears in by just cutting a slit (about where is shows on the pattern) I smushed the felt (ear piece) between the slit and just sewed it flat on the other side. You may need to move the ears around a little depending on where you want your face markings. After the ears are attached flop the ears down appropriately and sew one lil stitch to keep em looking good.

next you wanna sew the eyeballs (buttons) and ears on.

Next, sew both side pieces to the bottom piece, making sure the slimmer end is at the rear of the piggy. Next I sewed the top piece to the bottom piece just along the edge there (the weird triangular part of the top pattern is the part you want to be sewing here, it comes in and goes out for the nose yanno) I used a flat stitch for this, felt don't fray baby.

the nose and mouth got embroidered on right after that. I sewed them on so that the mouth ends right above the seam between top and bottom piece.

I will now attach a very terrible guide on how I embroidered that.

If you don't know how to do embroidery, you can also just draw a little face on with a sharpie (the prototype piggie has drawn on eyes and they look very cute)

next you wanna sew the rest of the top on following your sides, remember you are sewing it inside out at this point! You wanna see all your little raw edges.

sew it all the way down to the bottom edge, I promise this little flap is enough space to pull your little piggie inside out.

(note about butt flap: the top pattern says to add a few mm, that's just an over abundance of caution on my part. Everytime I did the piggies i had plenty of fabric for the butt flap and pattern is probably fine as is.)

finally I stuffed a bunch of polyfil into the piggie, starting with filling the face and moving along the back, at about half full I put in my bean bag sock. (you can also just put beans in anarchy style. no judgement.)

bean bag sock is just a sport sock that i filled about 2/3 of the way with dried navy beans then sewed shut at the top. (let the beans fall to one side of the sock then jam the sock part in with a chopstick, or anything stick like and let the beans flow into the part of the sock that's in the plush.) Someone please tell me which parts i'm over explaining.

after sock is in you wanna stuff a little more polyfil in, just making sure we look smooth and fat, jamming a little where you are going to close piggy so we juicy. Finally, sew the butt flap closed using a ladder stitch (if you don't know what that is, youtube has lots of instructional videos)

Yay Piggies!!!!!

Stuff List!

felt, at least 1 piece (69 cents at dollar tree- and if you tend to make mistakes, or the idea you only have one shot stresses you out, 2 sheets probably won't break the bank and gives you lots of oopsie room.)

embroidery thread (79 cents at a local fabric store, but micheals has it as well)

Black rounded buttons (4 for 1.69$ at micheals)

thread! (I had most colours but if you don't i did buy one spool of thread and it was only 2.67$ at walmart

Beans!! (helps them to stay upright- I just used some from home but the dollar store should be able to hook you up, for a dollar even. Also any dried legume should be fine, I even have some lentils that almost made it in)

Poly Fil -Fibre Fil (9.99$ for 1.25 lbs at Micheals, Honestly the bag is huge I barely used any of it for these guys. I used cut up socks and extra felt pieces to stuff for the prototype and he looks fine.)

(his mouth is different because I hadn't figured my life out yet)

All together I would say I spent less than 20$ CAD and I made 3, so like. A lovable not super expensive plush. live your best life.

Message me with any questions!! I have never made a guide before, and I am self taught at sewing so I don't know what kind of gaps I am leaving that others wont understand.

Love and kisses,

Rick

#Sewing #plush #guinea pig plush #arts and crafts #pattern #felt #how do i tag #a big plush guide #plush pattern instructions #guinea pig #how to

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buttercupbread06 · 3 months

Note

ok you gotta give some Michele background, what's up with his arm? How did he take all this demon thing and all

I'd like to preface this by saying Michele was a totally self-indulgent project I had this summer. Yes, he's too angsty and he has trauma and he's beautiful and dating a main character. I don't consider him a Mary Sue but I see how a tragic-ass backstory may be goofy.

I'll try to keep it short :3

Michele was born in Fortuna and left in an orphanage as a baby. His childhood from ages 0-6 was pretty normal for an orphan. Thing is, you know how Bianco Angelos are a messed up result of researching demon power? Well, in this canon there's more experiments!!

You'll never guess who acted as a guinea pig for Agnus.

Little Lino is taken from the orphanage at age 6 because be fucking for real, who's gonna miss him? And he gets experimented on. A lot.

It's a little hard to explain but the idea was "What if we put magic inside a person??". Making a better knight/living weapon. And he spent his childhood being subject to that.

Agnus actually achieved what he wanted, but Michele had his heart surgically removed and replaced with a golden prosthetic, which has alchemical properties or some shit and allows his body to channel demonic energy. And Devil Trigger (even if it's stressful and exhausting).

He has no arm because his left pectoral muscle got very messed up and there were some complications after the surgery, which resulted in a 12-ish year old Lino getting his arm cut off.

Here's a shitty little drawing (keyword shitty i drew this in class lol) so you get an idea:

The arm is detachtable up to the shoulder. His chest-plate thing can be lifted, and there's a sort of rib-like structure holding his heart in place. (Also yes the hand is pointy).

Does that answer your question? :]

I could go more in depth, I guess.

#☝️🤓

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tom-failure · 25 days

Text

Okay, so I've come up with a mystic messenger horror AU that I'm tentatively calling the Meatverse (ugly name, I'll think of something better later), and I don't have the energy to actually write multichapters, what with juggling making games and getting fired, and drawing gore is not really my strong suit, but I'm DYING to share it. So you'll have my bullet points for it, unedited.

The worldbuilding:

In this au, the world exists on more than just physical level, or plane. In fact, it is divided into two: the cortex and the Red matter, or Meat. All the world as we know it is the cortex, and the discovery and study of the Meat are top secret and virtually unknown. The Meat is a nether layer of the world, inner and hidden, formed by subconscious desire and trauma, where intangible and psychological things are made manifest. It looks literally like the world made of meat and viscera, all pulsing and alive.

Inherently, The Meat is neutral, but it is way more malleable than the cortex, and thus more easily corrupted, and the corruption of the Meat is extremely dangerous to the cortex, which is part of why the existence of the Meat is the secret so heavily guarded

Cortex is the layer that, on the one hand, protects the Meat, and on the other informs it and changes it.

The Meat carries the historical memory, integrates experience, and shapes the future of the cortex. The Meat is responsible for group mentalities and generational trauma

Although formal study of the Meat is secret to the public, there are people who stumble into it by accident, or secretly search and study it on their own. Such individuals are secretly hunted

Sometimes, as a result of experiences, humans become vulnerable points, where the membrane of the cortex wears thin. Such persons become able to greatly affect The Meat, and thus shape the fates of the world. The danger is, they can use it for good or for evil, and their actions are often informed by their experience

The background:

As a result of her upbringing, Rika becomes a vulnerable point, and starts profoundly feeling the effects of The Meat. As a traumatised person, the signals that she is able to accept from Meat are mostly downward trends and experiences of suffering that echo her own on a greater scale. As she begins contemplating suicide, she starts to secretly hang out with the people on the margins of society, on the lowest, bonding with them over their shared experiences. There, she befriends a drug dealer who experiments with less known substances. Once, he tells her about a very dangerous, potentially deadly mixture, which Rika persuades him to let her try.

When she tries it, the mixture alters her vulnerable point state, and Rika witnesses The Meat. For a brief moment, she is scared, but then she immediately becomes fascinated by it. She quickly understands the workings of The Meat and how it is connected to cortex. She spends some time studying it.

After a while, with her studies and drug usage, she furthers her vulnerable point state up to where she could see The Meat at will, without having to rely on either substance or state of mind. She was her own guinea pig, and then later she also recruited the dealer. She searched for ways to bring him to Meat with her, and found that torture and pain were a quick way to create a vulnerable point.

She also wanted to bring V with her, which is where all of their weird conversations about hurting each other came from. But she hated hurting him for a while, and she tried other ways which ultimately did little to create in him a point of vulnerability.

She discovered that Saeran was another Point, and saw in him a prodigy. She used him, however, to try and find a way to make V a Point. Ultimately, when she hurt V and left, that was her way of creating a point of vulnerability, but she didn't want to see it made.

She had Magenta built and created Mint Eye as a twisted way to create a big cluster of vulnerable points, which she would then basically lovebomb, using that as means to bring profound good to the world via Meat. However, for her plan to succeed, she had to create a space of suffering first, which is why she confined her cult to the mansion, to make sure the evil didn't leak. Only the cleansed vulnerable points were allowed out for recruitment, those that did not ooze pain any longer. Those, however, were mostly very broken people, absolutely incapable of any meaningful action at all.

The elixir is used in Mint Eye as a gateway to Meat

Basically a lot of what Rika did there was not just for the 'greater good', but also to bring V at her side. She wanted him to be the change for good, and herself she saw as the harbinger

Eventually, fearing the great pain escaping the mansion, she started fusing the cultists to the house via Meat. For their cortex beings, that meant that they developed a physical dependence on being within, and spending time outside a while drew them back or killed them. She fused herself with the house to nurture them and give them care and love, partly as compensation, and partly to encourage them to stay.

Zen has potential to become a vulnerable point made by suffering if he accepts his pain. He is very close to it, and his prophetic dreams are a symptom.

Yoosung is another type of vulnerable point in the making, built up by love and kindness and acceptance in response to the harsh world, however, his development is hindered by Rika's disappearance. Accepting kindness and love of others and finding the courage to bring forth his own kindness actively can make him a fully realised vulnerable point

Seven is also a vulnerable point, which Rika knows, but she leaves him out of the cult as a way to further Saeran's connection to Meat. Seven is hired by an org studying Meat, and is tasked with searching out potential vulnerable points who will be closely supervised by the org to be supported and killed if they threaten Meat. Which is why he behaves the way he does and tries to stop Yoosung and Zen from becoming vulnerable points by encouraging Zen to be more lighthearted and overconfident, and bullying Yoosung. He has to take meds to take plunges in Meat, and does not have Meat-sight at will.

Saeran develops Meatsight without Rika knowing

The plot:

Joori Nam (MC) is scouted by Saeran as an extremely valuable vulnerable point in the making, with great potential and little effort required to fully realise her. She was supposed to be bait for Seven as Rika realised he is on the hunt for them, but she fell for Jumin, and then was rescued by Jaehee, disrupting the development of her vulnerable point as she, for the first time in her life, was actually cared for like this.

Saeran starts getting impatient and acting out, disrupting the Meat and making the house unstable. By then, he is half-split into several conjoined entities on the Meat level, partly separate but still acting as one. Rika forcefully binds all but one of the entities on Meat level, and partially separates the most docile one

Around then, V's vulnerable point becomes fully realised, and Rika meets with him, telling him it was all a test and that she is ready to accept him with open arms. V is dependent on her, so he gladly agrees, and then Rika puts him in the lowest, secret level of the house, and forms a sort of a chrysalis around him, so that he would sleep and see kind dreams until her cluster is ready and she would have him make the Great Good. His entire cortex-level being falls into a sort of a coma, and Rika tends to him herself.

The mansion grows from the body of Rika on the top, and the body of V on the bottom, but everyone thinks it's just Rika

V disappears and Seven tracks Mint Eye via Saeran. Joori, on her part, actually finds documents on Mint Eye, too. Basically, Jaehee, Jumin, Zen, Yoosung, and Joori at that point have no idea that Meat even exists. Joori finds some notes, but she can't place them and dismissed them

Seven decides to go to Mint Eye with Vanderwood, who is his org partner, also a vulnerable point who has meatsight at-will. Yoosung is not willing to let Seven go alone, and wants to help save his friends, as he doesn't understand the severity of the situation. Yoosung insists Seven allows him to take him with, but Seven flat-out refuses, and Zen secretly volunteers to take Yoosung there and come with him as backup. Zen has a lot of confidence in his abilities and he fancies himself a saviour of all

Separately from them, Joori (who is let in on a little bit as the person who has found the blueprints and notes of Rika's) wants to go with Seven, too, but is dissuaded by Jaehee

Seven gets into Mint Eye secretly (as he thinks, not knowing that Rika's feelers are probing the house). Rika orchestrates the meeting between him and Saeran, aiming to push both their vulnerable points to greater power, but Yoosung and Zen appear suddenly, disrupting the 'reunion'. The dormant entities of Saeran's awaken, he wants to attack Seven, but Zen saves him, and Saeran attacks Yoosung instead, which both Zen and Seven witness. Saeran essentially further disrupts Yoosung's vulnerable point development. And then Rika takes control and all four of them are imprisoned.

When connection with them is lost, Joori persuades Jaehee that they must go and check, and they are unexpectedly joined by Jumin, who pleads with them to go with. He has information that V was last seen around the mansion. Jumin by then is a mess, and Jaehee tries very carefully to keep Joori sane, so that she doesn't jump into his clutches again.

In three, they go to Mint Eye and are also eventually captured because of Rika's total control of the house

They must find a way to reunite and stop her. The Meat exposes everyone's trauma in a visceral way, so to work together they need to admit it and they need to be able to look at each other. But for a lot of them the first reaction is to hide or to make it seem like nothing is wrong with them

Basically I'm thinking that in the process of them working together Yoozens reveal their feelings, because they're kissing in every universe

I imagine Yoosung tries to reason with Rika, but she simply tells him that he must accept her love to fully realise his potential as a vulnerable point. She sees him as a person who will take the gospel of her and V's success and be her successor elsewhere, starting another ripple of good deed through Meat. She basically explains to him about Meat and has him drink her Elixir, and Yoosung actually sees the Meat and understands what she is talking about. She explains the workings of Meat to him, but Yoosung is too concerned with the present state of the house as an enormous heap of pain that is already oozing outwards. Rika keeps him away from his friends a while, treating his eye (yes, he loses sight there in this version as well, this is something that will happen in every universe I have any say in). She gives him elixir, and Yoosung keeps it and hides it. Rika knows Yoosung little, and she can't really understand him well, cortex or Meat. And she relies little on cortex, operating more often on Meat level, so Yoosung can hide stuff from her.

I think all of them will have to drink elixir and face each other in The Meat, and they will have a lot of explaining to do, and a lot of rifts put between them. I imagine the main conflict would be that the only way they see to stop Rika is to destroy her. But she has hold of all the people in the house, and severed from her, they would all likely die. Someone must replace her and ease them out of it, but none of them are strong enough, so whoever stays will not leave alive. Yoosung will immediately volunteer, and Zen will immediately try to stop him.

But somewhere around there Jaehee and Joori will find V and V will actually be the one strong enough and willing enough to fix this.

I imagine Joori will develop some power of her own, which will help them find V

Seven and Saeran will meet in the Meat, too, and there will be some profound connection, maybe Seven will physically connect with Meat-Saeran to give him strength to at least be restored to the previous state, where he was semi-detached from himself, and not almost-detached, but in the process they will become fused. And in helping Saeran Seven will not save him, and will hurt himself

Yeah, it has a happy ending

#mystic messenger #meatverse au #to rename #mysmes #maybe I'll actually draw something for it #but like in a month when I'm finally fired #прівєт пострижися

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