it’s been…a while since you and satoru have gone on an assignment together.
having two young children at home made it difficult to take off on short notice and be away for days at a time. they needed stability and routine, so the two of you had decided that one person would stay home while the other was working.
for a while, that’d worked fine. but now that megumi and tsumiki were older, self-sufficient teens who loved nothing more than being left alone, satoru had seen this as an opportunity.
you’d still been a little hesitant, but it was a simple surveillance mission. easy, right?
“water. you need to stay hydrated.” you instruct when he gets back into the car. he takes the water bottle you’re holding out, unscrewing the cap and taking a swig.
“gakuganji isn’t even home yet,” he reports with a sigh. you hum, distracted as you check your phone. gojo reaches across your knees to pull open the glovebox, rifling through colourful snack wrappers.
“tsumiki hasn’t texted me back,” you mutter. “should i ask nanami to check in on them?”
“nah, i’m sure they’re just super busy trashing the apartment and racking up charges on the emergency credit card. ah– found it!” he pulls out a black silk sleep mask, slipping it on so it rests on his forehead.
“really?” you ask, unimpressed as he holds a second one out to you. “you’re taking a nap?”
“yeah, it’ll be easier to sneak around when it’s dark, why stay awake till then?”
“is that a good idea?” you ask, though you know there’s really no point in trying to argue with his logic.
“your fault for keeping me awake all night. late night laundry folding is no joke.”
“if you’d put it in the dryer when i’d asked—”
“can’t hear you,” he sing-songs, pulling the mask over his eyes. “you can take a nap too, you know. that old fart couldn’t get past us even while asleep.”
“i’ll pass on the nap. need to wait for tsumiki to text.”
he grumbles something incoherent that you’re sure is meant to be argumentative as he reclines his seat a little and lays back, getting comfortable and quiet.
…for about 45 seconds.
you watch out of the corner of your eye as he pulls the mask up a half inch, just enough for his right eye to observe you.
“what do you want now?” you ask.
then, with casualty akin to asking what you want for lunch, he clears his throat and asks, “do you want to have sex?”
“do i want to have what?” you ask, turning to stare at him incredulously, but your face is hot and for a split second, you’d considered agreeing.
“sex,” he repeats, patting his lap with a shit-eating grin. “we’re going to be here for a while, anyways. these seats recline way back—”
“i am not having sex in this car with you, satoru!”
he groans over-dramatically (as he tends to do). “will you at least cuddle with me then? i’m desperate and touch-starved and hopelessly in love with you!”
you make a note to figure out what cheesy rom com he stole that line from, but lean across the console to trail kisses up his shoulder, his neck. satoru does nothing to protect himself from your overly affectionate onslaught, he’s quick to catch your jaw, pulling you in for a proper kiss.
“wait. no, no, no!” he protests when you pull back, eyes suddenly trained on the house you’re meant to be watching. “you can’t just leave me high and dry—”
“he’s home!” you whisper, pressing a hand over his mouth (though he continues with muffled complaints). “pull the car a little further back before we get out.”
you’ve already summoned your shikigami as satoru maneuvers the car into the dense forestry, about to send them off when your phone vibrates in your lap.
“oh! megumi texted me,” you inform him. “he said…‘already made dinner. tsumiki is out on a date—’”
the car grinds to a halt and abruptly turns, the momentum causing your to slam into the side of the car as it peels out onto the dirt road. you curse loudly as your fiancé, devoid of all his playfulness from earlier, speeds through the forest.
“what the— satoru!”
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adhd anon here! That’s completely okay! Could I instead request headcanons for Matt with a gf who lives with the triplets and has like a sister like bond with Nick and Chris🫶🏻(about a year younger than them and quite short as I’m pretty short haha)
so sorry for taking so long! work is on my ass fr🙄
ever since matt's girlfriend moved in with the triplets, everyone's life suddenly became easier.
house always smelt good, clean, and tidied up. some new decor, plants, throw-on blankets, and pillows upon pillows. the house just had a touch of a woman. just what every house needed.
matt's girlfriend, who cooked everyone's favorite food.
matt's girlfriend, whose love language was gift giving! always buying them stuff if she saw something that reminded her of them.
matt's girlfriend, who would have to play mediator everytime the boys argued. she was quite scary for a short lady! they may be a year older and much taller, but she knew how to handle them.
matt's girlfriend, who loved the boys to death, but could never get alone time with matt. always having chris pop up in their room to tell them about the bad dream he had...
matt's girlfriend, who would always talk shit about matt when he pissed her off to his brothers. like that audio on tik tok "i'm so afraid of her" 😭.
matt's girlfriend, who had just as much attitude!
matt's girlfriend, who was loud and funny just like chris. reserved and shy just like matt, and loyal and real just like nick!
matt's girlfriend, who would always have to give her opinion on chris' outfits cause he thought her opinion was so valid.
matt who was so happy she was his girlfriend, and got along with his brothers so well. he admired her the most! always showing his love and appreciation for her.
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Steve and Gareth as cousins warm up, part two!
First part is HERE.
Next part is HERE.
Reminder: Someone on Twitter proposed Steve and Gareth as cousins whose family had a major falling out, and then someone else brought it up recently and long story short no idea who to credit the idea too bc you can’t search for SHIT on Twitter but it's theirs not mine.
Warnings: Steve and Robin Get (canon-S3) Drugged.
"I'm just saying the other theater is cheaper." Eddie said around the straw jammed in his mouth.
He carried the largest bucket of popcorn Starcourt’s movie theater offered, alongside the two boxes of candy he'd also demanded Gareth buy him.
"Easier to sneak into, you mean." Gareth corrected, with his significantly smaller bag of popcorn. His, he planned to share with Jeff, Grant having snuck in his own food.
Gareth himself would have snuck in the cheaper (and far larger) snacks, but Eddie had thrown a fit about going to the mall to see a new movie instead of Hawkin’s far older theater.
Of course, the older theater also had several disadvantages, key of which was terrible seating, and so, Gareth had bribed him with whatever treats he wanted.
His wallet took a hit but fuck it, at least they got to actually see the screen.
Not that they even made it into the fucking theater, because someone chose that moment to crash into Eddie.
Popcorn kernels and soda flew everywhere, with Eddie only avoiding it landing on him and Gareth both by years of dealing with this exact bullshit in school. Of course, the mall wasn’t school, and neither of them had their guard up.
"What the hell man--" Eddie spat, immediately on the defense, as they both turned to see what jackass wanted to cause problems this time.
Except Gareth had recognized the person who bumped him.
"Steve?" Gareth asked, causing his cousin to totter around and face him. He was in his Scoops Ahoy uniform, which remained to be absolutely ridiculous, but that hadn't been what had drawn Gareth's attention.
No, that would be the absolute wrecked face staring at him with a doped up grin.
All thoughts of the movie immediately faded away.
"What happened to your face!?" Gareth demanded, immediately stepping up into his cousin's space, eyes darting over the damage.
Recent black eye, split lip, blood splatter all down one side of his neck, nevermind his clothes…
"Robs!" Steve called over his shoulder instead of answering, body moving as if he was walking on a wildly rocking boat and not solid ground. "Come 'ere!"
He beamed, which had the horrific effect of resplitting his lips. "Meet Gareth, my baby cousin!"
"I am two years younger than you." Gareth argued on automatic. He didn’t look to see how Eddie took this little piece of info--he’d figure out what he’d say later, when Steve wasn’t covered in blood.
It did not stop Robin from reaching out to pinch his cheeks.
She too, Gareth realized, was clearly high on something, both of them giggling and weaving on their feet.
At least Robin didn’t appear to be hurt--or at least, not hurt as badly as Steve.
"What the hell did you two take?" Gareth demanded, looking between them as he quickly put his popcorn back off to the side.
"We didn't take anything, dad." Steve said bossily, rolling his eyes. He spoke in a voice so unlike himself that Gareth knew his own face was doing something crazy.
Not that he could stop it because what the hell.
"What my patriotic friend here means is that we don't know." Robin added, smacking a hand onto Steve’s shoulder.
(The entire sentence was slurred and sounded like she'd shoved candy in her mouth before she started talking.)
"You don't know?!” Gareth asked, taking in the way Steve flinched when Robin touched him. Added a mental note to check his cousin's shoulder too. “How do you not know?"
Gareth wasn't panicking, he wasn't, except he absolutely fucking was. Steve's dad was going to kill him, disown him, and throw the body out of his house--in that exact order.
Gareth’s parents wouldn’t take him in, not unless his mom felt she could use it to one up her sister in some way which meant that Gareth was going to have to sneak Steve in and out of the house like he was some--some puppy Gareth was trying to keep and--
"Did someone give you two something?" Eddie asked, interrupting Gareth’s spiraling.
"Give is a very strong word." Steve said with a snicker.
Robin nodded so much she looked like a bobble head. She leaned in, nearly falling into Gareth in the process. “In fact it’s not the word I’d use at all! I’d use…” She trailed off, screwing her eyes up in thought.
“Made us?” Steve suggested as Gareth finally gave in to his instincts and reached out to steady his cousin. “Forced us?”
“Socked it to us!” Robin added with a weird amount of glee, and the two of them once again collapsed into giggles.
Literally, forcing Gareth to try and steady them both.
Which meant Eddie was right--they’d been drugged. It made perfect sense-- Steve wasn’t the kind to experiment with drugs beyond weed. Had in fact, given a very long lecture about how he’d make Gareth go on runs with him if he ever found out Eddie had given him anything stronger than weed.
There was no way he’d change now, and especially not around a jobsite. Particularly one as busy as the mall.
"You can't tell anybody." Robin continued, eyes so wide they were more white than pupils. "But we got truth serumed!"
As if that made any fucking sense.
Gareth turned a half frantic, half disbelieving look to Eddie--whose own face scared him almost as badly as Steve's did.
He was hiding it, and doing a good job of doing so, but Eddie was the one person Gareth knew better than Steve.
Right now? Eddie Munson was furious.
Not mad, or upset, or even as pissed as he had been the time Tommy Hagan had thrown his drug box in the river.
He was enraged.
"Hey." He said, and the only thing more shocking than realizing Eddie was this mad was hearing him talk in a calming, almost playful voice. "Sounds like you two sailors had a pretty rough time. Why don't we go to the bathroom and get you both cleaned up? I bet you'll feel a little better."
It was clearly the right move, because both of them looked downright delighted.
"He thinks we're sailors!" Steve said, cupping a hand around his mouth and leaning to talk in Robin’s ear as if he was whispering. (He wasn’t.)
Robin’s grin grew impossibly wider, before Eddie stepped forward to help Gareth half guide half herd the two into the nearest bathroom.
"I know you." Robin said, squinting dramatically as Eddie opened the door with his regular flair, bellowing for anyone in the place to get out.
It was Steve's turn to nod enthusiastically. "That's Eddie, Robbie." He said.
"I'm honored King Steve knows such a humble peasant's name." Eddie bowed as Gareth finally got both Steve and Robin into the bathroom, trying to get them to sit on the floor before they fell on their asses.
Which just made a hurt expression appear on Steve's face. "’Course I do. You have really pretty hair."
It had the effect of making Eddie look like he’d been punched and Gareth had to quickly turn his bark of laughter into a cough.
"I bet it's soft.” Steve continued, as he pressed his back against the tiled wall and slowly slid down to the floor. “Gare, is it soft?"
"It's very soft." Gareth agreed, trying to wet a paper towel with shaking hands. Finally he gave up entirely, ripping the plaid sweater he had tied around his waist and shoving one of the sleeves into the sink.
“Oh my god.” Robin said abruptly, sitting up from her own slouched spot on the floor as if she’d suddenly been stricken sober. “It’s him! He’s your type!”
“What’s my type?” Steve turned to her, as Eddie leaned his back against the door to the bathroom, blocking anyone else from entering.
“It’s like--like Nancy! But boy Nancy.” Robin seemed to think this made a ton of sense, and given Steve’s immediate groan maybe it did to him, but Gareth was too freaked out to even begin to process what the hell they were on about.
Probably nothing, given they’d been drugged.
Eddie seemed to pick up on his general anxiety and poor attempts at shoving down his own freakout, because he gently called out Gareth’s name.
“I think it’s wet enough.” He added with a raised eyebrow. His eyes drifted purposefully to the sink and with a curse, Gareth snapped shut the water off.
His hands were still shaking.
“Give it to me.” Eddie said gently, moving to take the shirt from Gareth’s hands. “Here, swap me Gare, and guard the door.”
Gareth did, as Eddie knelt down to take Steve’s chin in one hand, and carefully began dapping his wounded face with the wet sleeve.
“May I ask what battles you two sailors have been involved in?” He said, continuing to sound like playful, fun Eddie and not like he was about to murder half the town (which, Gareth could tell by body language alone, is what Eddie actually felt like) “Did you happen to catch a glimpse of the villains who did this?"
“Robin melted into Steve, rubbing her face in his shoulder. “You wouldn’t believe us.”
Eddie smiled his most charming smile, a full blown rouge grin he played up as he continued to wipe and dab at Steve’s wounds. “You’d be surprised at what I believe in, my fair lady.”
Steve tried to talk, but ended up hissing as he ran into Eddie’s fingers.
“Russians.” He managed to get out, when Eddie quickly took the sleeve away so he could talk. “We got kidnapped by fucking Russians. Also we kinda saw some shit and they’re after us. Possibly you now if they saw you with us.”
There was the briefest of pause as Steve and Robin stared at Eddie, as Eddie stared back.
Then Steve and Robin as one started howling with laughter, so hard that Robin’s head ended up in Steve’s lap with Steve’s own head resting on hers.
Eddie turned to give Gareth a pinched look. “Russians.” He said, still calm despite it all. “Right.”
Which had to be the fucking drugs speaking.
Gareth just took a deep breath as Eddie managed to gently prod Steve back into putting his chin in his hand, shaking his head ever so slightly.
He didn’t know who he was going to actually have to murder, but at least Eddie looked to be on board with acting as his backup.
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Thoughts on Mars placements
!! everything is based purely on my experiences with signs, written with no other purpose than to share my observations and be unserious.
Aries mars. Practical jokes lovers, gentle touch haters. Hit u while laughing. Love the banter, sometimes a lil too much. Go for it (whatever it is) fiercely and without a single backthought. Explosive in conflict, but in a sense of crying screaming throwing up banging against the wall.
Taurus mars. Life could be on Mars but they still be going on and on about that one thing. Sudden outbursts of anger. It might seem out of the blue but they’ve probably been brooding some hurt for a long time. They just hoped it’d go away… naturally. Also surprisingly horny.
Gemini mars. Mind fuckers. That one guy defending polygamy «as a concept» rather too enthusiastically. Can talk their way out of hell with one leg already in the hottest boiling cauldron. I suppose it’s a placement most people will find charming at some point (says a lot about society…).
Cancer mars. Rumors are true, the sky is blue, and they are manipulative. Watching anybody else display vulnerability is the same as watching a children’s play to them. Ur rawest and most disturbing moment? To a cancer mars its a chill Tuesday morning. Humanization of a silent treatment.
Leo mars. You’d gather that its serious by the sheer scale of their reaction but I promise its not. 9 times out of 10 will cause a huge scene and won't be able to remember it 2 days after. Very defensive. Won't put themselves out there if they’re not guaranteed a 10-minute standing ovation.
Virgo mars. They believe that they make sense but usually they don't. They’re calculating but it’s like they do it backwards resulting in some of the most unhinged decisions made. Want to be praised for… um… existing as they are. Kind of a menace in conflict.
Libra mars. If u think it's hard for you to wait for them to make up their mind imagine how they feel. It’s similar to watching a plant move without a time-lapse. Cry when they’re angry. Go with the flow not because they’re chill but more cause it's easier for them.
Scorpio mars. They ARE vengeance and I'm scared. Slash 3 tires after one fight mars. Not the person you’d try to make jokingly jealous. For further information read the lyrics to… really any Taylor Swift song.
Sagittarius mars. Don't think before they do and think after they’ve done smth only if u make them. The kind of people that will try everything once just to know how it feels (and then present that to everyone as if they’ve found god by bungee jumping one time). Very easy to dare. Also are always checking someone out.
Capricorn mars. Blood is cold, the heart is beating twice per minute. ISN’T IT lonely on top of the world fellas??? If u get them to like u your love language better not be words of affirmation. Instead of arguing chances are high they disappear for a while or just go into a rock regime.
Aquarius mars. Are only attracted to intellectuals so naturally in a room full of sweet gentle people will go for the most narcissistic motherfucker out there. They’re sorta very patient but I feel maybe it's just them dissociating… Ponder a lot before making a move.
Pisces mars. I'm afraid no one knows whats going on there. It's like they’re never actually present. Therefore often times can have a delayed reaction to smth, which people might read as passive aggression. Very sentimental, will write u a song or a poem on a second date. Also low LOW energy.
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