#BWAHAHAHAHAH
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Things That Never Happened in History Class
1. Professor Gadling's History 101
"... and so you see, Nan Boleyn was no 'femme fatale' homewrecking the happy Tudor household and leading the 'good' King Henry astray..."
There were snickers in the room.
"... though it makes for some pretty good stories, aye? Always love me a good bodice-ripper or that Jonathan Rhys-Meyers on the telly. He's a dish, that one." Professor Gadling leaned a bit forward, a naughty gleam in his eyes. "Though, the real King Henry was a looker when he was younger. Looked a bit like our Prince Harry, now that I think about it."
More laughter. Which was typical in Professor Gadling's classes. Iggy Pop - really, that was his name and yes, his parents loved him dearly - said, "Like, the dude's got a way with bringing all that historical stuff to life. Like he was totally there. Totally awesome, dude."
Iggy also had some of the best grades in the class, California surfer animated Pixar turtle accent and all. But the observation was accurate.
And it was also one of the reasons why Professor Gadling's history classes were booked solid every semester.
2. Nevermore
Sometimes, there was a raven on Professor Gadling's shoulder.
The first time he appeared, he was perched all nice and comfy on the professor's shoulder, looking as calm as you please, fixing the class with his beady black clever eyes.
The Professor sighed. "No, he's not me familiar. He's babysitting."
"You mean, YOU'RE babysitting him, right, Professor?"
The raven squawked in protest. Professor Gadling rolled his eyes. "He's the one doing the babysitting. I try not to pick arguments with ravens, you see. Terribly bad idea."
"Nevermore," said the raven clearly and drolly.
The class eventually learned the raven's name was Matthew.
3. There can be only one
There was a persistent rumor that someone once confronted Professor Gadling with an honest-to-God actual sword.
It happened in that secluded alleyway created by the old library and the faculty building, or so the story went.
The Professor, in atypical fashion, went, "Nope."
"There can be only one!" declared the sword-wielder, raising his weapon.
"Nope, I'm NOT that kind of immortal. You don't get to take my head, there's not going to be any ruddy lightning quick-thing whatever it is you lot call it. I'm not the droid you're looking for. Go off with you."
Apparently, Matthew the Raven helped drive whoever it was away - aside from the fact that the Professor was actually pretty good in a fight.
"Ugh, Pierson owes me THREE pints for this!"
4. Shakespeare In Love
There was a rule that got passed down from class to class.
For sheer unadulterated entertainment, get Professor Gadling to rant about William Shakespeare. Oh, he wasn't one of those who posited that the Bard never wrote his plays. Far from it.
He just absolutely had Very Specific Opinions about the man. And they were Loud, Pointed and absolutely Hilarious.
This was also good for distracting the Professor long enough to get out of any last minute homework or suprise quizzes. There was hell to pay during the next class, but it was well worth it.
"You are too harsh on dear William, sir," said the snow-pale young man in black, with the messy, rumpled hair.
The class wasn't sure how he suddenly appeared in their midst, although it felt like he'd always been there. He looked perfectly grave, absolutely serious... except for the glint of mischief in his odd dark blue eyes.
The professor crossed his arms over his chest, looking sourly at him. "He was a ruddy hack. Got a bit lucky, I'd say."
The pale young man smiled faintly. "He had a true gift that just needed a little bit of nudging."
A scoff. "Sure. Exchanged his soul for artistic immortality, Faustian bargains, deals with the Devil."
"No." The smile was still there and it was mesmerizing to see, as if this wasn't a man given much to that expression. "Just two plays, commissioned to order. What need have I for men's souls?"
"Hmph."
"Jealousy does not become you, Hob Gadling."
"Oi!"
"Uh... Professor, should we leave you two alone now? Like, this whole lover's quarrel UST thing you've got going is kinda cute, but we really don't wanna be around for the kiss-and-make-up part!"
Of course, it was Iggy Pop who just had to ruin what seemed to be the most interesting moment that had happened so far in Professor Gadling's history classes.
Someone raised a hand. "I don't mind being around for the kiss-and-make-up part!"
The class would later learn that the young man's name was apparently "Murphy."
He was also Matthew's "boss."
Any kissing and making up supposedly took place at that New Inn down the road, which also served, among other things, a delicious shepherd's pie.
- end -
NOTE: Yes, I did a Highlander reference. I couldn't resist.
#the sandman#dream of the endless#hob gadling#dream/hob#what have i done#i crack what i want#shhh no one tell neil#bwahahahahah#dream and the one time he made a sensible lovelife decision#such happy#very wow#losing his emo boi goth badge
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being an adultress has cost me a group chat
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Okay I just have so many hilarious thoughts about the relationships in ALON. Just imagine Zhang Ping is Wang Yan’s little brother (doesn’t matter if adopted or biological) and Zhang Ping is still longing for Mu Yesheng.
Wang Yan: You know your older brother is one of the top detectives in this country! You can admire me!
Zhang Ping: Sure... *continues to lovingly look at scripts of Mu Yeshengs cases*
Wang Yan: ಥ_ಥ
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Ichigo's (entirely reasonable IMO) reaction to seeing a butterfly~
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☀ - ask my muse to stay the night
Atem grinned and it was down right lecherous. "Oh ho ho ho. You want to play find the millenium rod don't you Yugi? I can show you my Kuribo's if you're a good boy. You do have the whipped cream this time don't you?"
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DoodleDump Friday: the amogus experience. angst warning, for it is truly heartbreaking.</3
#my art#total drama#total drama reboot#total drama island 2023#total drama bowie#total drama raj#total drama wayne#rajbow#among us#bwahahahahah what if i told you I dreamt that#alkenny draws
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What happens if you put three mentally unstable skeletons + their babysitter in the same room?
Exactly what is happening in the Roleplayed Timeline
@parniathedevil @ask-yandere-sci @another-underfellsans
#uw hopeless timeline#hopeless uw!sans#residentdust!sans#yandere science!sans#(another) underfell!sans#the roleplayed timeline#They went from playing dirty jokes and immoral pranks on Hopeless to killing each other.#Soulless even risks to destroy the multiverse if he dies.#Hopeless is losing his shit overwhelmed by thoughts.#Sci is currently being possessed by a parasite.#And Fell is going insane too with these idiots.#I MISSED THIS MESS BWAHAHAHAHAH
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A FUNNY POST OF MINE WAS REBLOGGED BY A THERAPIST WITH A TAG "MEMES TO SEND TO CLIENTS" I AM CRYING-
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I always find it hilarious when people get rejected n mocked by astarion in act 1 😭😭 like nauuur you’re trying to hard he’s just a saucy little guy ignore him n he’ll be all over u
#bg3#bg3 astarion#he has the harshest rejection lines bwahahahahah#I like to make him say please beforehand
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Because I am god damned shipping trash and you can't stop me, I started looking up things. When I saw this:
I had a hot moment of: BWAHAHAHAHAH! Then I was like: I wonder what the other names mean. The rabbit hole.
I found a twimbler by jikooksubunit that basically summed up to : Katsuki Yuuri means ‘student of a victor who benefits from courage’ and I think that is beautiful. And I was like: Fuck yeah.
Then I went further down, because fuck you, you can't stop me.
Yuri Plisetsky means (first name) farmer [unless he's Jewish, in which case it means Light of God] (last name) Influencer/Freedom Lover/Charisma. Which, I mean, humble origins, willing to suffer for what he wants, and damned if he's not an influencer with his own style and everyone wants a piece of him (for good or ill). Also a fucking demonic angel. So... yes.
And as you know, shipping trash don't do half. So I looked up Otabek Altin. We all know Altin means gold. What dose his first name mean, google? Fucking help me! So it did. It's actually an Uzbek name. It can be translated as "The Father of all Dukes" or “The Greatest Duke”. In middleage it was also a title for all the heirs coming from a certain lineage of Taimur.
MY MIND FUCKING BLOWN.
Fucking ICE KING Winner-Winnerson
his Queen/King consort SIMPAI TAUGHT ME HOW TO KICK YOUR ASS
there feral ice child some times called princess to the determent of everyone with the sheer chutzpah to try it HO, I'M GONNA AND MAKE YOU PAY THE BILL RESPECT MY ETHEREAL, DAINTY, TOUGH AS NAILS ASS, YOU BASIC BITCH
and his BFF/prince charming : LITERALLY A FUCKING ROYAL BLOOD LINE MADE OF GAWD DAMNED GOLD, A.K.A. original 'Daddy of them All' (it's in the fucking name!), called a hero of his home country (rescue Yurio, on your modern day steed, daddy?). [Calmly exert your 'dad energy' in that 'you have awoken the beast' way that the wild cat some times needs?] Ether way, mah dudes. Ether way.
No wonder his ass can afford to ship that bike where ever he wants. Yurio is gonna get so damned spoiled.
I love this fucking fandom.
#YOI#Yuri On Ice#!!!#shit i looked up to avoid writing my WiP#i just needed a break#this gave me life#Victor Nikiforov#Katsuki Yuuri#Yuri Plisetsky#Otabek Altin#Victuri#otayuri#i am such shipping trash#i amuse myself
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MS PAINT FINALLY CAME OUT WITH LAYERS SO YOU KNOW WHAT I HAD TO DO BWAHAHAHAHAH as always i apologize for my lackluster warrior cats posting, but i hope yall enjoy this in the meantime :,D!!!
i like how it came out but i know i def could've done better for the lineart!! love the new layer addon though- super cool :]!
#cw eye strain#cw eyestrain#eye strain#cw blood#tw blood#warrior cat#warrior cats#eyestrain#sparklecat#sparkle cat#warriors#wc design#hollyleaf wc#hollyleaf warriors#hollyleaf warrior cats#hollyleaf#warriorcats#warriors fanart#warrior cat fanart#warrior cats fanart#its 3am i wanna be asleep so baddd
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Photo
1. Bwahahahahah
2. I love that Rang ended up both with his brother and with his girl.
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Sass starter
“You’re like, five feet tall. How you gonna reach me, shortie?”
{MP @mutilated-psyche}
Atem motioned Kek in with a grin and stage whispered loudly. "Tell my psychopathic friend, have you ever heard of the Millenium Step stool?"
#ore no turn: answered ask#BWAHAHAHAHAH#I am so happy I get to bring this back#Milleniumstepstool#He's slapped the shit out of Seto once with it.
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BWAHAHAHAHAH
Original image
👇
HELP-
#rottmnt#rise of the tmnt#rottmnt leo#rise leo#rottmnt shitpost#south art#turtles shitpost#HAHAHAHAHA#I WAS BORED MAN#HAHAHA
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Your superserious new header and blog description made me do a spit-take bwahahahahah
glad you like it ❤️💚
#waipa superiority!!!!!#they are such a fantastic ship lbr#bbs#waipa#adrm#asks#happy april fool's day!
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Hamsteven is so done with us scrolling on TikTok for hours and hours. He has to take things into his own hands (paws), although not very successfully :(
BWAHAHAHAHAH poor steven struggling to unplug you!!!
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