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#Australian Flying Fox
ssecond-hand-faith · 8 months
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Workout Music
Cringetober Day 10: Fursona
Absolutely blasting the Price Of Flesh DLC soundtrack while I run
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Spirit the Black Flying Fox, via
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neonharvest · 9 months
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You can now get my design on redbubble. I have just started my shop and will be uploading more pastel content soon.
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wenbochenphoto · 4 months
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The little red flying-fox (Pteropus scapulatus) colony, Northern Territory, Australia.
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arthistoryanimalia · 1 year
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For #BatAppreciationWeek:
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Artist: Billy Missi (1970-2012) Sapur Au Kubi (Dark Flock of Bats), 2006 linocut print 12/90 69x100cm Cairns Art Gallery
Artist info:
Place of Birth Mabuiag (Jervis Island), Torres Strait, Queensland, Australia Language Group Kala Lagaw Ya. Totem: Koedal, Kaigas, Dhangal Clan Group Wagedagam, Gumu, Pania
Artist notes:
"During mango, almond and cashew nut season a lot of Sapur (Flying Foxes) come to our village and gardens.
When the sun begins to set in the western sky, the Sapur usually come in flocks from the thick mangroves that fringe the coastline.
The Sapur only come out at dusk to raid the fruit trees so that people cannot see them. Otherwise they would be targeted by hunters and chased away. Despite this they do make a lot of noise as they feed.
The Sapur suck the juice out of the fruit and dispose of the rest making a lot of mess under the trees. They do this all night until morning breaks when they take flight back to their isolated, thick scrubs and mangroves.
Growing up in the islands in the 1970's, these sightings were common during fruit season.
It is our uncles who tell us that whenever flocks of sapur approach the gardens, the fruit is ripe.
This image shows a large number of Sapur flying to the village to feed on the fruit trees. They circle above the trees to choose where they will feed for the evening." - Billy Missi
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bjekkergauken · 1 year
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So, I drew a bunch of african animals in a TLK imitation style last year and I had a person suggest i should draw animals from other places in the same style so heeere’s aussie tlk or smth Top to bottom, left to right: Spectacled flying-fox, eastern pygmy-possum, spotted cuscus, dugong+remora, spinifex hopping mouse, numbat, red-legged pademelon, platypus (Page 1) Jewel spider, little penguin, cassowary, common bluetongue, superb lyrebird, frilled lizard, throny devil, spendid fairy-wren, crimson rosella, rainbow lorikeet, red-eyed tree frog, wobbegong shark (page 2)
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voidbirds · 8 months
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Welp! Guess my queue ate all my posts!
Anyway! Heres a staple of Australian Nightlife, the Grey Headed Flying Fox! We commonly call them fruit bats, due to their diet being made up of mostly Fruit and Nectar!
An interesting fact for you! Australia is free of traditional Rabies (Another important reason we are so careful about transporting pets) but we do have ABLV or Australian Bat Lyssavirus which has on occasion been spread to humans.
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x-chiropteraz-x · 9 months
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Caption: A crib full of 2‒3 week old baby grey-headed flying-foxes in care of Wildcare Australia at The Bat Hospital. November 2008.
Image by user Wcawikinfo.
Licensed under: Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported (CC BY-SA 3.0). As defined at: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/legalcode
The grey-headed flying fox (pteropus poliocephalus) is the largest bat in Australia - their wingspan may reach up to 1 meter (around 3ft 3in).
They feed on nectar and pollen, as well as a variety of fruit, and play an important role in the propogation of these fruit species by distributing their seeds.
They are classified as Vulnerable under the Environment Protection and Biodiversity Conservation Act 1999.
Bonus fact: the grey-headed flying fox seems to be very faithful to the location in which they build their camp, some fox camps having been used for over a century!
Wildcare Australia is a not-for-profit organisation devoted to the care, rescue and rebilitation the wildlife of Australia.
Image source: https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Greyheadedflyingfoxbabies2008canungra.jpg
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what-the-fuck-khr · 7 months
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oh yeah so for like the last week or two we’d been hearing some noises outside and we’ve been like. the fuck is that. always at night and crap and it’s a new animal noise we’ve not heard before. to tell you how boring our suburb is, I’d never heard a frog croak at night until this year LMFAO so! we’ve been getting many kookaburras this month (I assume bc of the heat…?) and now this so we’re like. huh.
anyways we’ve got bats
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nickyrollings-art · 7 months
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Wizard Flying Fox is nothing if not committed to the bit. Even if the bit isn't very good. He spends all of his daily spell points on maintaining his levitation spell and is near useless in combat. But he's having fun. Isn't that what counts? No. No it is not. His inaction in battle almost got his party eaten by a grue.
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bigvolcano · 5 months
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Lismore Biodiversity News - Species Watch
During a recent field excursion, Environmental Strategies (ES) team members encountered a solitary Grey-Headed Flying Fox displaying concerning behaviours, including resting low in a tree away from its camp.
Supporting Grey-Headed Flying Foxes in Critical Times During a recent field excursion, Environmental Strategies (ES) team members encountered a solitary Grey-Headed Flying Fox displaying concerning behaviours, including resting low in a tree away from its camp. Recognising these signs of potential illness, the team promptly contacted WIRES for guidance. Such behaviours, including remaining in…
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furmity · 1 year
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Grey- headed flying foxes arrived in Tarndanya (Adelaide, South Australia) in 2010. They hadn't been here before that. A colony took up residence in Botanic Park and can now be seen all around Kaurna country. At dusk and dawn you can see highways of these batties flying out in search of fruit (this is a fruit growing region, you ought to know). There are specific trees you can visit to see them roosting, and these are in the city! It gives me HOPE to see some native animals actually expanding their range and increasing a region's biodiversity. They're not "feral" animals for once.
We have hot summers here, but the extreme periods of 38- 42°C generally only last for a few days to a week. Then it rains, hopefully with a thunderstorm, and cools off for another week or so. We’ve had a very cold summer this season, but today was 39. Extreme heat can kill the bats, such as on the unprecedented 47°C day in January 2019. I was living in the desert in January 2019 but that news still shocked me.
I wonder about this as the climate crisis continues, the migrations of animal populations. I can't think too long about the Great Barrier Reef without feeling desolate, but so long as corals aren't completely poisoned out of the ocean there can be other, new reefs.
This is why addressing pollution is so important for mitigating the consequences of climates changing. If we have clean water and uncontaminated soils, the wildlife and people stand a chance. There are all kinds of places which in our lifetimes may become completely uninhabitable, or at certain times of year. The First Peoples should be allowed to manage their lands and waters, for all our sake.
Perhaps you do live in a stable, peaceful nation, free from prejudice and not about to risk your life escaping it. Have you ever considered your city may one day empty and that you could be a climate refugee? Where will you go? Where can you go that’s clean and not buried in plastic? Stamping out xenophobia and racism are essential for these futures.
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casp1an-sea · 2 months
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I was kinda nervous to share this but I do have an Octonauts OC/Self Insert
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I know the coloring is sloppy and unfinished I was trying to replicate the art style
Casper Bat, (Flying Fox to be specific) Has an Australian Accent because Yes. Ey/Em Pronouns
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@xen-blank, @thehollowwriter, @l7k-a, @ferris-the-wheel, @keii-starz
@krenenbaker @elenauaurs @the-banana-0verlord @edith-is-a-cat @dove-da-birb
@theosb0rnway @fizzydreamz @kw4ziicat
@animalsalvationassociation
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discokicks · 10 months
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FOX IN THE BOX — ROY KENT.
PART TWO of ACES AT THE WATER’S EDGE.
(series masterlist!) (AO3!) (series playlist!)
pairing: roy kent x fem!reader (no use of y/n!)
summary: back in 2012, you and roy meet for the first time. in 2023, you sign a one-year contract with richmond and have to work with roy for the first time. both go about as well as you’d expect.
word count & rating: 9.6k, R (roy kent says fuck and does fuck!)
chapter warnings: swearing, light sexual innuendos and light references to sex, mentions of alcohol and partying (the olympians get DOWN in olympic village) minor allusions to what happened to reader at west ham, major football talk, roy kent is rich, original character intros and plot (author really likes a plot, woo boy), angst, and of course, fluff.
author’s note: ok wow, thank you for all the love on the first chapter! wildly unexpected but much appreciated. this one’s got a bit more to it— jumping timelines, original characters, lotta soccer/football talk, reader and roy don’t know how to act (in more ways than one). also did crazy research into the 2012 olympics for this, so no one tell me my timeline’s off or i’ll cry. also also, is roy's sister named molly or is that just evidence that i've read too many fics? whatever it is, her name's molly! thank you again for the love and i hope you all enjoy! love you all tons! -mags
LONDON OLYMPICS. (LATE JULY, 2012)
You meet Roy Kent for the first time at midnight, in a rookie’s dorm room in the Olympic Village.
It’s a seemingly unlikely place for a football phenom like him to be. You’d expected all of those guys to choose to be elsewhere, exploiting their home-country advantage to hang out in their posh flats. But there they were, carrying out their team bonding efforts to prepare for their game tomorrow. 
Knowing what you know about Roy now, it’s fitting for him to have been there. But in this moment, you’re shocked to see the likes of him in Olympic Village. 
It’s a place that’s convinced you that your college career was only good for preparing you for it. And you’re not even talking about the sports aspect of it. You’re talking about the shit-show, chaos-menu of athletes from around the world, acting as though it’s the first week of freshman year.
Despite the fact that alcohol, drugs, and any other traditional party favors are completely off-limits on-premises, it doesn’t seem to deter your fellow Olympians from running the dorms like it’s a frat party. You’re half-convinced you’re going to get a classic ‘who do you know here’ from the trust-fund-looking Australian swimmer you pass getting into your building, but he just sends a heartbreaking smile at you and your teammate as you walk in.
Your team’s fresh off the bus from Glasgow, having just beat France at Hampden Park. It was a hell of a way to open, despite the Opening Ceremony not taking place for another two days. As a younger player who’d proven herself in last year’s World Cup, you were the starting striker in your first Olympic game ever, scoring the second goal of the match and assisting the fourth. The adrenaline of it all hadn’t quite worn off yet. 
It’s clear that your teammate’s feeling the same way. Melanie Rivera, your left winger and for all intents and purposes, best friend, is straight-up vibrating. You’d met during World Cup training, where you two had instantly clicked and she’d taken you under her wing to show you the ropes and what it meant to play at this level. Despite this being her second Olympics, the feeling of a win never goes away. Or at least, that’s what she tells you.
The two of you are practically bouncing off the walls as you arrive on your floor, giggling to yourselves about different things that had happened during the game. Your fluent-in-French full-back telling off a French forward when she got too close to your goalie. The mid-game mishap where some French girl’s cleat went flying. The ‘bullshit’ yellow card Mel had received right before the half (Mel knew it was a fair call, she’d totally pushed that girl). 
“She was asking for it, though,” Mel insists, collapsing onto your bed as you enter your shared room. “Pulling on my shirt the whole game. I have two rules. Two. Don’t—”
You roll your eyes, having heard these rules a million times. “—touch my goalie, and don’t—”
“—touch my fucking kit,” she finishes, throwing her hands up exasperatedly. Her eyes shut with a huff.  “They’re pretty simple. Don’t know why people can’t follow them.”
“Yeah, it’s a travesty,” you reply dryly. Your lip curls into a grimace as you look at her. “You wanna know what my rules are?”
One of Mel’s eyes opens with a knowing smile. “Don’t be sweaty on your bed?”
“Oh, so we do remember,” you say, falsely cheery. The faux smile falls from your face. “Get off. Or at least shower. I want to go to bed and I don’t want to like, smell you.”
Mel rolls off your bed with a dramatic sigh. “Fine,” she relents. “But you can’t go to bed.”
Your expression remains unamused. “And why not?”
“Because the British men’s team is hanging out upstairs,” she states as if the answer’s obvious.
“Right. Of course,” you reply. “So, we’re crashing their team bonding?”
“No,” she says, pointing at you. “Their women’s team crashed. And then Jack texted me to tell us to come up.”
You narrow your eyes at her. “Uh-huh. Is Paige there?”
Mel shrugs, avoiding your gaze. “Maybe.”
“Oh, great,” you say sarcastically. “So, you’re forcing me to stay awake so I can wingman you?”
Mel flops on your bed once more. “Please,” she cries. “Dude, I like her so fucking much. We’ve been texting since the Cup and I don’t know, this year I think I’ve got a chance.”
“Why can’t Jack wingman you? He’s clearly down to set you two up,” you say, sounding a bit whiny. “Also, why are they hanging out here? I thought they’d rent a place or stay at their own houses.”
“They make the rookies stay in the Village their first years. It's for the experience, or whatever,” she answers. That’s brushed to the side quickly. “Also, Jack is a fucking awful wingman. The only type of scoring he’s good at is on the field.” She looks at you expectantly. “And I can’t go up there alone. I’ll look like a loser.”
You gape at her. “You are twenty-seven years old.”
“And I’ll look like a twenty-seven-year-old friendless loser!” When she sees the expression you’re wearing, she tilts on her side. “Say yes or I’ll roll around in your bed.”
You cover your face with your hands, an exhausted laugh echoing into your palms. This clearly is a losing battle, and you decide you’re going to be a good friend tonight. “Fine,” you groan, hearing your bed squeak as she launches herself off of it with a cheer. “An hour. That’s it. And then I’m going to bed and never talking to you again.”
“I can live with that,” she yells, bounding for the shower in your room. “I’ll text Jack that we’ll be up in thirty!”
“You owe me so big!” you reply.
You can hear Mel’s grin when she says, “I love you, too!”
Thirty minutes later, you’re freshly showered and up three floors, standing outside of the rookie’s dorm room. You can hear just how loud it is from outside and you suddenly really feel like you’re back in college again. 
It takes Mel a solid three minutes to work up the courage to knock on the door, something that you’re sure would have taken longer if you hadn’t reached out and done it yourself. She scowls at you, but the door opens before she can cuss you out.
Jack Wilson, Tottingham sweeper and three-time Olympian, answers the door with a wide smile. You’d met him a handful of times due to his friendship with Mel and he was just as lovely as everyone had said. There was a charming sort of awkwardness about him despite his status as a professional footballer, but it made him all the more endearing to you. 
“Glad you finally decided to show,” he said to you two, opening the door wider for you to enter. “Congrats on the win.”
“Thanks,” Mel said, eyes already scanning the small dorm living room for Paige. “What’s up with the team bonding in the dorms?”
You’re also looking around the room, sending smiles to the handful of girls you recognize. “Game tomorrow. Coach wanted us to do dinner as a team, so we ate in that big hall. And we--” he says, pointing to two guys on the couch, “--wanted to see the Village this year. So here we are.”
Your eyes follow his finger to the men, one of which isn’t familiar. The other, you immediately identify as Roy Kent. And his eyes are on you.
He’s easily recognizable, curly hair a bit more tame and managed than the iconic, half-assed mullet he’d had when he first signed with Chelsea. That ever-present scowl only lifts a little when he sees that you and Mel have arrived, but you honestly can’t see much change in his expression due to his drawn brows.
While you’d relied on Mel for the majority of your connections to this new world of football, she’d never really seemed to hang out with the likes of Roy. From what you’d gathered, despite his rather high status, he was a bit of a recluse. Yes, he went out constantly, and yes (if the tabloids were right), he’d certainly dated around, nobody really seemed to know much about him. 
When he’d come up in a team game of ‘Fuck, Marry, Kill’ with famous footballers, Mel had told the group that he was a guy of few words, and of the words he did say, ‘fuck’ seemed to be his favorite. Your friend and teammate Katie O’Connor was ready with a terrible impression of him when she answered with ‘fuck,’ especially after Mel also confirmed that the Gina Gershon news was true. 
You try to ignore this as you go over to introduce yourself to them, despite the fact it’s currently setting up camp in your brain. “Nice to meet you guys,” you say to Roy and the other boy on the couch. Jack takes a spot next to you on the floor as you take an empty chair next to the couch. Paige waves at you from her spot when you sit.
Roy nods at you in acknowledgment. “Good showing out there.”
Jack points at you. “Bloody insane goal you had,” he says. “I think I’d break my back if I tried to do a scorpion kick like that. It was fucking class.”
You grin. “Well, lucky for Tottenham, they keep you on the other side,” you say, then quietly add, “Not that it would make a difference.”
You see Roy’s lips twitch up from the corner of your eye, and you bite back a laugh as Jack physically deflates before you. Mel’s heard your comment and runs over to sit on the arm of your chair, which is conveniently close to Paige. “Ooh, is it shit on Tottenham time? Because I haven’t seen your ass in months, so I got a whole list, man.”
As the two of them begin to argue in the way they do, you sit at watch them with a smile. They’d had this type of relationship since you’d met them back at the Cup, when Jack had flown into Germany to see your final games. Despite the loss, those were a wild couple of weeks.
The moment your brain starts to recount them, you can feel a pair of eyes on you. It snaps you out of your haze completely. Especially when you realize that it’s Roy Kent who’s staring at you once more.
You blink at him, slightly confused by the attention. “Hi?”
He nods at you again. He seems to take a moment to evaluate you, and then, “You overthink.”
“W-What?” you ask. The word comes out clunky and confused.
Roy motions to the TV that’s on across the room, one that’s showing highlights from your game. “Out there,” he says. “You overthink.”
The two of you stare at each other for a moment. You, feeling unbelievably out of sorts and unsure of what brought this on, Roy, secure and casual, like he just stated the weather. 
Before you can question him, he nods at you for a final time, then stands up. “I’m going home,” he tells the group. “You lot better be fucking ready for the game tomorrow.”
Roy’s out of the room before anyone can say a proper goodbye to him, but no one bats an eye. No questions follow. 
Except you, of course. You’ve got a fucking million.
You overthink on the field? Where the fuck had he gotten that from? How had he seen it? While there were some times, yeah, you got a bit in your head, you’d never considered yourself an overthinker. And even if you were, the overthinking produced results, right? You liked to think you were just three steps ahead of everyone else out there. Not an overthinker.
But what made him say that? What had he seen? Was it your hesitation outside the box in the first fifteen that resulted in you losing the ball? Was it the switch you’d made to get to the goal when your right winger had it on the side? Was there a look on your face when you’d taken that free kick in the second half? You were pretty in your head then, but hey, it led to Mel scoring.
Overthinking. Pfft. He didn’t know what he was talking about. 
But then again, what the fuck was he talking about?
The thought of this unknown bomb dropped on you without any sort of answers quickly and completely took over your mind. Criticism about your playing had never bothered you (you were a twenty-five-year-old female soccer player, and you’d had more horrendous coaches than you could count), but this? This was something that literally made you itch. And you weren’t going to be able to scratch it until you knew what the hell he meant.
Before you knew what you were doing, you found yourself practically chasing Roy out of the room, whipping your head around to figure out which way he’d gone. Lucky for you, the dorm’s slow lifts were on your side. 
Roy stood by the elevator, checking something on his phone as he waited. He clearly doesn’t hear you coming because he nearly drops it when you ask, “What do you mean I overthink?”
“What the fuck?” And now he’s staring at you like you’re the crazy one.
“I should be asking you that!” you say, then motion back to the direction of the dorm. “You tell me I overthink, stare at me with no follow-up, then leave? Who does that?” You’re way too animated for past midnight, but you don’t care. “Because even if I was an overthinker, which I’m not, that sort of stuff is probably the worst thing you can do. Not leaving on a note like that is like, rule number one.”
Roy’s brows shoot up. “I wasn’t aware there were rules.”
“Yeah, well, there are,” you reply, crossing your arms over your chest. When he continues to just stare at you, you make a face that you hope will cue him to go on. “So, go ahead. Please explain yourself.”
“Explain the overthinking thing?” he asks. “I thought it was pretty fucking simple.”
You roll your eyes. “No, what made you say that? Was it a play I had? Was it something I did? What did you see? I’m just curious as to—”
“You came up the field toward the end of the game,” he says, effectively cutting you off. “And you made a pass to Rivera that led to another pass, then a goal.”
You nod at him, not seeing his point at all. “Yeah? So? It was a great goal by Katie.”
Roy’s expression turns slightly frustrated, as if he’s annoyed that you don’t immediately catch on. “It was a great goal. But the fucking second you saw Rivera next to you, you started thinking ahead,” he tells you. “So far ahead that you didn’t notice how slow and fucking awful your mark was and that you could have had a better goal if you’d stopped thinking.”
There are approximately fifteen seconds of dead air between you two as you attempt to take in what he just said to you. “So, let me get this straight,” you begin. “You’re saying I’m bad because I think too much about teamwork?”
For a moment, you think Roy’s going to slam his head into the elevator door. Instead, he just turns to the buttons and presses them once more. “Fuck’s sake, could these be any fucking slower?”
You’re too far gone at this point to even be offended. “Uh, it doesn’t matter. You started this. You’re not going anywhere until we finish it. Why does me not being a selfish dick make me bad?”
“I didn’t say you were bad. You’re not. Clearly,” he responds. You note a bit of the classic ‘Roy Kent’ anger laced within his words and it makes you snap your mouth shut. “I’m just saying. You’re at your best when you’re not so fucking nice and when you don’t fucking think.”
Unconsciously, your arms cross over your chest. “I’ve got twenty-two years of playing time and about ten coaches that would disagree with that.” 
Once more, you see the corner of his mouth slide upward as he glances at you. “If that’s the case, then your coaches were all idiots. They weren’t smart enough to let you loose.”
An unexpected warmth rises to your cheeks. But instead of acknowledging it, you ask, “What, like you’d be a better one?” Before he can respond to that, you’re talking again. “And even if all of that were true, I wouldn’t know how to do that.”
Roy’s brow creases. “Do what?”
“Not… think ahead,” you say. “Or not think at all. That being three steps ahead thing is kind of, well, my thing.” You offer a shrug. “The generous, teamwork thing too. I like that. It’s what makes me good.”
Roy continues to look at you, but says nothing. For a moment, all is quiet as he just… stares, almost as if he can see through you. Like he’s privy to something you’re not, or he’s had some sort of revelation about you. You’re not sure anyone’s ever looked at your this hard. It’s a bit unnerving and you have to fight to not avert your eyes.
Before you can begin to further overthink that (god fucking damn it), he’s holding his phone out to you. You stare down at it blankly. 
“You’re showing me your phone,” you state, but it’s almost a question.
Roy rolls his eyes. “Put in your fucking number,” he says.
Your lips purse as you hesitate, but you find yourself reaching out for it. “Is this how you typically do it?” you ask, typing your name into his contacts. “You neg a girl for five minutes straight and then ask her for her number?”
Roy rolls his eyes again, but there’s humor amongst the annoyance this time. “I’m going to text you a time and an address,” he tells you. You hand him his phone back. “Be there on Friday after the Opening Ceremony.”
The elevator had finally arrived in the middle of his sentence and you eye him wearily as he steps in. “Just… show up to this address?” you ask. “Do I get context? Like, what to expect? What am I dressing for?”
“Overthinking,” he reminds you as he presses the button for the lobby. “Just fucking be there.”
Before you can object further or tell him that you were not in fact overthinking, you were just a woman in a foreign city concerned for your safety, he leans forward to stop the doors from closing. He’s got one hand up and has a small smirk on his face.
“And just so we’re crystal fucking clear,” he says. “If I were trying to chat you up, you’d fucking know it.”
Your eyes immediately fix into a glare and the doors close before you can say anything in response. “Asshole,” you mutter to yourself, but you’re already flipping your phone over to see if he’s texted you.
(You won’t know this until much, much later, but Roy Kent let out a loud and regretful ‘fuck!’ as soon as he was five floors down, absolutely cringing at the idea that he used a line like that on someone like you. It plagued him for three years straight.)
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PRESENT DAY. (EARLY AUGUST, 2023)
On a day when Roy not only had the strangest interaction of his life with Jamie Tartt in the Boot Room, but he also found out that Trent fucking Crimm would be lingering around all season, he was sure that he was done with surprises at Nelson Road.
That quickly proved to be false, as he soon found that Ted was rounding the team up in the media room for some sort of meeting.
Roy saw Beard as he was leaving the Coaches’ Office and sent a questioning look his way. “Did I miss film on the agenda?”
Beard shook his head. “Nope. Impromptu. We just heard back.”
“Heard back?” Roy asked, watching Beard go to leave the room. “The fuck are you on about?”
Beard smiled at him in the doorway. “We got her,” he said and left with a skip in his step that Roy wasn’t sure he’d ever seen before.
They’d gotten her? Got who? 
Then it hit Roy. Oh. You. They’d gotten you.
You’d said yes. You were joining Richmond. He’d helped convince you. Despite everything, despite all that had happened and everything you two had done, you’d said yes. You were willing to work with him. You were now going to be back in his life for worse or for better. And not just back in his life, but a fucking constant in it.
Then that hit Roy. The reality of it all fucking bodyslams him and it makes his heart race. After eight years of cold-turkey no-contact, he was going to be seeing you every day. After everything he’d done. After everything you had done.
Roy realized then that he didn’t exactly consider this feeling. That he was so blindsided by Rebecca’s request and by seeing you that he didn’t even think about this. It had been hard enough to work up the nerve to confront and speak to you once. Would it feel like that all season? Had you considered this?
But then, he remembered you and how you think about every fucking angle of every situation. You definitely had thought about this. And if you were willing to push the discomfort, the awkwardness, the whatever in order to have this job, he supposed he had to be too.
Roy swore under his breath, turning away from his desk to get his head back on straight. The team was waiting for him. He could mope about this in the comfort of his own home later.
He arrived in the room just as the rest of the team was getting in. The boys were buzzing. Between the news of a potential Zava acquisition and the Trent Crimm book development, as well as whatever this was, they couldn’t seem to stop talking. Roy didn’t blame them. It was a lot for one day. 
(It’d been a lot for him too. With everyone now knowing about his break-up with Keeley, to fucking Trent Crimm, to you, he was surprised he hadn’t gone outside to scream yet. But he presumed that was coming.)
“Alright fellas, listen up,” Ted said from the front of the room, holding his hand up to get everyone’s attention. The team quieted down after a moment. “I know there’s been a lot of talk going around this week. And I know y’all are excited. But I’ve got some more news.”
“I don’t know if I can take any more,” Dani said, sending a wave of agreement through the group. “It’s hurting my head.”
Ted chuckled. “I know. Mine too. And we’re the ones who have to manage all this,” he said, motioning to Beard and Roy who stood against the wall. “But this is good news.”
Good news? That was something the team could manage.
“So, how many of you are familiar with the Women’s World Cup that happened back in 2015?” he asked, eyes scanning the crowd.
A murmur went through the team. “America won?” Colin offered. “Crazy final game that was.”
Isaac pointed at Roy. “You did some shit for Sky Sports for this Cup, right?”
As the boys began to recall this, Jaan Mas said, “Why they gave you another pundit job after that completely blows my mind.”
“Yes, Roy did do some TV work over here,” Ted answered after the laughter died down. “And yes, America won. But does anyone remember what this Cup started to be called?”
It seemed as though no one had an answer. That is, until Beard cleared his throat said, “The Summer of Fourteen, baby!”
Ted snapped at his best friend. “That’s exactly right, Coach. And despite it being the 2015 Cup, they called it that because of this woman right here.”
Ted had brought up what is perhaps the most iconic photo of you to date. It’s one of the first things to come up if you were to Google yourself, a picture that’s haunted you for the last eight years. It’s from the 2015 quarter-final. You’re mid-penalty kick against China, scowl on your face as your foot collides with the ball, blood dripping down your face from the broken nose you’d received moments before. 
(It’s certainly not the most elegant or flattering picture of you that exists, especially when your fellow teammates’ search results yielded photos of them at the ESPYs, but you still think you’ve never looked like more of a badass.)
Ted said your name smoothly as he pointed to you on the screen, annunciating all syllables. “Wildly prolific USA Women's athlete despite her rather short time in the league. And while she was always good, y’know, starting striker since she began and all that—” He chuckled, turning to look at his other coaches, who had knowing smiles on their faces. “—I don’t know. There was something in the water in 2015. Because she just became…”
Ted trailed off, looking for the word. This time, Roy found it before Beard. “A nightmare,” he said, with a suppressed yet fond sort of smile. “She was a fucking nightmare out there.”
“In a good way, of course,” Ted cleared up, earning a nod from Roy. “But, yeah. A nightmare. Wonderful teammate and fantastic playmaker, but man…” Ted trailed off with a low whistle. “We were all glad she played for our neck of the woods.”
Jamie’s hand went up. “Didn’t she just get like, hired and fired by West Ham?”
“Wonderful segue there, Jamie,” Ted said. “Because yes, that is true. She was with West Ham for a couple months. First female coach in the league. Pretty impressive stuff, and it was a pretty big deal. And then something went wrong, and they let her go.” The team made a noise of acknowledgment, all of them having seen it in the news. “And I don’t know what happened, and we probably won’t know what happened, but we knew she was too good to leave the league. Lucky for us, we need a new coach. And she needs a new job.”
There was a wide smile on his face when Sam asked, “So she will be joining Richmond?” 
“That she is, Sam,” Ted replied, earning yet another eruption of chatter amongst the group. “She’ll be joining us on Monday. And while I know you fellas will do everything you can to make her feel welcome and will show her the same level of respect that you show us up here—” Ted pointed to his coaches once more, glancing down at the computer in front of him. “—I’m going to show you why she deserves it more than us.”
A YouTube video of your highlights appeared on the big screen, going full-screen as the quick ad ended. Ted stepped back from the computer, sitting down on the stool behind him to watch along with the rest. 
Your famous 2012-France-Scorpion-Kick goal just so happens to be the first thing up and Roy’s heart nearly stops. It’d been years since he’d seen this clip and he was immediately transported back to the night you two met. A ghost of a smile unconsciously made its way up his face as he watched your body contort to flip around, and the ball soar into the net. It was a goal of pure and utter instinct. You hadn’t thought about it. You just ran in there like a maniac and knew what to do. That one gets an immediate reaction from the team.
The next one is a play you’d set up in the Quarter-Final New Zealand game, with a bunch of quick passing in the box to confuse and rattle the defense. Melanie Rivera had sent you a world-class assist for an even better goal, one that earns you the title of ‘Fox in the Box’ from the past commentator on screen. The next, an impressive goal scored after an injury you’d had in the Semi-Finals against Canada. Then, and perhaps most famously, your assist to Katie O’Connor from midfield to win the Gold. 
And they hadn’t even gotten to the World Cup yet.
The World Cup footage made up the other three-fourths of the video. It was a completely different side of you, one that had thrown caution to the wind, one that had a huge fucking chip on her shoulder, one that was just… insane. In all the best ways and meanings.
Roy’s shock of the day, though, comes after a highlight of you completely blowing past three Colombian defenders. You’d broken the fourth’s ankles with your footwork in the box for a quick goal. Footwork of yours that had been massively improved, Roy noted. And he would know, he’s the one who did it.
Arlo White’s voice filled up the room. “And yet another breakaway goal from USA’s Mean Fourteen!” The clip said. “It’s just remarkable to watch her work this year, don’t you think, Roy?”
Roy felt all eyes on him when he heard his own voice on the speakers. “I don’t know what USA would do without her,” 2015 Roy Kent said. “I’d hate to have her against me.”
It was strange for Roy to hear his own voice mock him like that. And as the team began to cheer for him, he felt a pit form in his stomach. They didn’t even know.
The highlight reel continued for another couple of minutes, and it seemed with each play, the boys became more excited about the prospect of being coached by someone like you. Beard and Ted were evidently just as ecstatic about the development, and Roy knew he had to get on board. Warp his feelings and nerves and whatever else into something resembling his team’s attitude.
After all, he was the reason you were joining.
The lights came up as soon as the video ended, snapping Roy back to reality. Ted smiled at the team. “Alright, fellas. Now, let’s get to work on the welcome party.”
The boys hooped and hollered, each of them getting up to join in whatever Ted had planned. Beard looked over at Roy as the rest filed out. 
“You think we’re ready for her?” he asked.
Roy hated the weird fucking sixth sense Beard had when it came to… well, everything. He made Roy feel like he was completely transparent. “We’re ready for her,” he replied.
Though, he wasn’t sure if he was assuring Beard or himself.
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PRESENT DAY. (EARLY AUGUST, 2023.)
You sign a one-year coaching contract with AFC Richmond that Monday in Rebecca Walton’s office.
The news broke that you’d been picked up by Richmond on Friday, something that had completely come alive in the press world. Your face was plastered over all of the papers yet again, newscasters seemed to mention your name every time you turned on your TV, and social media was set on fire. Everyone had something to say about this move and the majority of it wasn’t too positive.
You tried to keep your nose out of it, knowing just how much you did not need to see people talking about you like that. The majority of the negativity was from West Ham fans, wishing Richmond ‘luck’ with the likes of you, others wishing you good riddance. 
If they knew how happy you were to be out of there, you’re not so sure they’d be as excited to let you go.
Though signings on every level in this league were typically more public affairs, ones with major press conferences and coverage, you’d requested this to be quieter. Just a few statements from the people who mattered and a pen and paper. You’d been in the media a bit too much for your liking over these past couple of months, and if you could get some exclusivity, you’d take it. 
Rebecca, thankfully, was more than happy to comply. You’d been in contact with her practically non-stop since you’d called her, and she’d been nothing but lovely to you. Each interaction with her made you feel better about this job, despite the cloud of anxiety that still hung over you.
You’re sitting in a chair opposite Rebecca’s desk when a message from Mel comes through. i always liked richmond better than west ham anyway, she says. paige and i bought shirts and will be at every game. 
A photo comes through shortly after of her three-year-old toddler, decked out in a Jamie Tartt jersey. oliver’s already got his!
You can’t help the smile that spreads across your face, fingers tapping against your screen with a quick response. adorable. give him and paige a hug for me. and i’ll be freaking out so bad at every game that i’m gonna need you there anyway, so i’m holding you to that.
you’ll be incredible. knock ‘em dead, kid.
Rebecca re-enters her office before you can respond with a thank you. She’s got Coach Ted Lasso in tow, who could not be grinning brighter at you. The second you see him, you think about everything Nate had told you during your short time at West Ham, and something within you just can’t believe it. The energy of Richmond had been different as soon as you walked through the door. The good kind of different. And their manager appeared to not be an exception.
Ted greets you immediately with an outstretched hand. “It’s so nice to finally meet you,” he says after your introduction. “I gotta tell you, we’re all mighty excited that you’re here.”
“I think I might be more excited,” you reply, and it’s an honest answer. Or at least, you’d been able to shift your nerves about the job into excitement. You’d only anxiety-thrown up once today. You figured that was an accomplishment. “Seriously. Thank you both again for the opportunity.”
“We’re just grateful you said yes,” Rebecca says. You can tell she means it. “The team’s been buzzing all week.”
The nerves return at the mention of the team, but you mentally scream at yourself to get over it. “Well, I’m just excited to get started.”
“Speaking of getting started, we should probably head downstairs,” Ted says to Rebecca. “I wanna show our new coach around a bit before practice gets going.”
“Of course, don’t let me keep you,” Rebecca responds. “I’ve got a couple more things for you to sign before you leave today, so just make sure to stop by. If you have any questions, my door’s always open, or you can ask Leslie, who you met earlier, who’s always wandering around somewhere.” Her smile gets warmer as she puts a hand on your shoulder. “And we really are pleased to have you joining us.”
You wonder for a moment how a woman like her could have ever been married to an asshole like Rupert, but you suppose that’s a story for another day. “Thank you,” you say again, a bit of that anxiety washing away. “I’m happy to be here.”
Ted leads you out of the office, his tour starting from the minute you exit. He offers a bit of insight into himself and his time at Richmond, his past two years working with Rebecca, then launches into what he knows about the history of the place (and you don’t have the heart to tell him that Rebecca had already done that when you’d arrived). 
The facility is gorgeous, but it feels a bit more lived-in and welcoming than what you remember about West Ham. Everything there was so manicured and monochromatic and sterile. Nothing about it felt like a place you’d want to work.
Richmond is the opposite. It’s bright and colorful and you can hear people laughing as soon as you step down into the lower level. While your nervousness about the team still lingers, you can feel it easing. You’ll see how long that lasts.
You’re stepping into the Coaches’ Office before you even realize it, mind too occupied with taking in your new surroundings and trying to keep up with Ted’s story. You resent the overwhelming amount of relief you feel when you realize there are only two men in the office, and neither of them are Roy. 
One is sitting with his feet crossed up on his desk and a book in his face. The other is writing on a notepad at a separate desk. You’re surprised by the speed at which both of them jump up to greet you as you and Ted enter.
“Alright, Coach, this is Coach Beard,” Ted says, and you meet Beard’s hand for a shake. “He’s one of the guys you’ll be working with this season.”
“Nice to meet you,” Beard says, nodding your way.
“You too,” you reply. Your eyes are drawn to the book he placed down on his desk and you allow yourself to grin. “I love Merlin Sheldrake.” When his brows shoot up in surprise, you shrug. “I’ve got a lot of time in the off-season.”
Beard’s eyes light up. “We’ll get along just fine.”
Your grin grows and you hear Ted’s voice from behind you. “Is that that mushroom book?” he asks. “I don’t think Beard’s ever found someone who reads that stuff too. I guess we’ve now got two Fun-guys in the group.”
You glance over at Beard. “Now it's a Fung-us.”
Out of the corner of your eye, you see Ted’s hand come up to his mouth as he looks over at his best friend. For whatever reason, it’s clear that the two of them are trying to contain their excitement. Before you can question it, Ted places a hand on your shoulder. “Oh, you’ll fit right in here, Ace.”
The nickname catches you off guard. It’s something that you haven’t heard since your playing days, something that the commentators and pundits loved to call you. It was always a compliment when they said it, but something about the way that your new manager says it makes it sound more like a title than a name. Like that’s what you are. 
It immediately makes you feel welcome and you can feel yourself warm into their excitement.
The other man in the room, who’s been watching this interaction in amusement, steps forward to hold out his hand to you as well. “Trent Crimm.”
Now, it’s your turn to raise your brows. “You’re the writer who keeps calling me?”
A smile that could also be a cringe appears on his face. “Guilty,” he answers. “Just trying to cover all the bases for the book.”
“I get it,” you tell him. “If you still want a quote, I’d be happy to give you one. But I can’t guarantee it’s going to be clean.”
Trent chuckles. “I’ll take what I can get at this point.”
There’s a moment where you almost question what he means by that, but you brush it off. Especially now that Ted’s started talking again. “Roy's running a little late, but I’ve heard y’all already know each other, so we’re not technically missing an introduction.”
That makes you pause. You’d figured that when Roy had appeared on your doorstep he’d told at least Rebecca about your past, and that the probability he’d told the staff was high too. But exactly how much had he told them? Did they know the basics or did they know everything?
You then realize it’s Roy you’re talking about. There was no way in hell he’d told them anything more than what Ted said. That you knew each other. Maybe that things hadn’t ended smoothly. But that was it.
That, at least, gives you a bit more confidence. Ted turns to you and leads you back into the small, adjoining room you’d walked through, pointing at an almost empty desk. “That’s yours,” he tells you. “Feel free to dress it up with whatever you want, and get yourself unpacked. We’re starting practice in about fifteen minutes and Coach Beard and I gotta set some things up, but I’d like to introduce you to the fellas before you start shadowing. That all sound good?”
You grip the strap of your backpack and nod at him with a smile. “Works for me, Coach.”
Ted grins, patting you on the arm. “Glad to hear it.”
And with that, he returns to his desk, making sure to leave the door open as he leaves.
You plop your backpack on your desk and begin to empty out your things. You grab your laptop first and place it on your desk, followed by a couple of knick-knacks and photos you brought along, ones that never felt at home at your desk at West Ham. There’s a rational piece of you that knows you should stop comparing the two places, but the pettier, more aggressive side of you tells it to fuck off.
(You like to listen to that one when you can these days.)
You’re holding a photo of a baby Oliver dressed in a Women’s USA onesie when you hear someone else walk into the room. You glance over your shoulder and immediately regret it.
Roy Kent is standing in the doorway, staring at you like he completely forgot your signing day was today.
Of course, Roy hadn’t. He’d been pacing around his flat all morning because of it. It was actually why he was late to work. But he hadn’t expected to see you as soon as he walked in. In his office. Now, your office too, he supposed.
The two of you just stared at each other for a moment, much like you did when you saw each other again for the first time last week. However, it appears that you’re both acutely aware of the three sets of eyes that are on you two from the other room.
Like you’re snapping into a scene in a play, Roy’s expression rids itself of all surprise. “Coach,” he says stiffly, nodding at you.
Coach. You suddenly remember your previous conversation. It’ll be professional. Civil. I won’t let there be any issues. 
Well, if he won’t let there be any issues, you’re sure as hell not going to give him the satisfaction of causing any.
So, instead, you return his nod. “Coach,” you greet him. As he puts his things on the desk opposite yours, your heart falls into your stomach, “A-Are we…”
“Sharing an office?” he finishes for you. You nod weakly. “Yeah.”
“Oh,” you say, then awkwardly add, “Fun.”
“I’m over the fucking moon,” he deadpans.
You bite your tongue, trying not to retort too quickly to a comment like that. You look away from him and to the keys in his hand and you prepare for the small talk you’re about to force yourself to engage in. “Tough ride in?”
It seems to take him a moment to process the question. The awkwardness of it all lingers. “Something like that,” he answers. However, his gaze is stuck on the picture in your hand. “What the fuck is that?”
Your brows furrow and you glance down. So much for small talk. “This?” You hold up the photo. “Oh, this is, uh, Oliver. Mel and Paige’s son.”
“Fuck off,” Roy says in a way that’s almost inquisitive, though the relief in his voice is palpable. You try to ignore that. “I didn’t know they had a kid.”
You huff a laugh despite yourself, and a bit of weight falls from your shoulders. “You clearly don’t follow Mel on anything,” you reply, then pause. “Oh, wait. I forgot. You don’t do social media.”
“It’s a waste of fucking time,” he says, reaching out to look at the photo. When you hand it to him, he mutters, “I think Rivera would have me blocked if I did, though.”
“Yeah, you’re not wrong,” you say honestly. You take the picture back from him and place it on your desk. Your next question comes out casual, and you can’t help but be proud of how nicely this is all flowing. “Speaking of kids, how’s Phoebe doing? And how’s Molly?”
You’re not expecting the hint of shock on Roy’s face when you turn back to him. It’s as if he can’t believe you’ve remembered his sister’s name, or his niece that you met when she was no more than six months old. You want to slap him upside the head for looking at you like that because, of course, you fucking remember that, but a knock on the door from the other room interrupts your conversation.
Trent’s standing hesitantly in the doorway, notepad in hand. “Sorry to interrupt,” he says, and he appears to be avoiding eye contact with Roy. “But if you were serious about talking, would you be free to do it tomorrow?”
You offer him a warm smile, hoping that’ll contrast Roy’s crossed arms and hard stare directed at him. “Sure thing.”
“No,” Roy immediately says. “You’re not fucking talking to him.”
Confusion takes over. “Why not?” you ask.
“Because no one’s fucking talking to him,” is Roy’s answer, firm, with no room for argument. His eyes never leave Trent. “And don’t try to fucking weasel your way into this team through someone who doesn’t fucking know any better, Crimm. You’re fucking better than that.”
You’re gaping at Roy as Trent nods at you kindly and retreats into the locker room. When you look back into the office to see if you can get some clarity from one of your other new colleagues, you notice that they’re both missing. Ted did say they had to set some things up.
You suppose that just gives you the ability to talk freely to Roy now.
“I’m sorry,” you say, whipping back to Roy who’s already facing his desk. “Has he not been given the O-K to write a book about this team?”
Roy grunts. “He has. But it doesn’t mean we’re fucking talking to him.”
“Well, doesn’t that, like, defeat the purpose of him writing a book?”
“You’re catching on.”
You lean back against your desk, folding your arms to take on Roy’s previous stance. “Oh, I see,” you say in understanding. “This is a Kent Rule.”
He doesn’t have to be facing you for you to know he rolled his eyes. “No, it’s not.”
“Oh, it’s totally a Kent Rule.” You stare at his back as he shifts his shoulders in discomfort. “You hate him, so you’re forcing the team to hate him. Enemy mine is enemy yours? That’s Kent Rule number three, if I’m remembering correctly.”
“It’s a team rule,” he states. “I’m just enforcing it.”
“Right,” you agree, though your voice says differently. “Each person here hates him so much that they allowed him to write a book here.”
Roy shakes his head with a scoff. “Fuck’s sake, I forgot how fucking irritating you were.”
“I’m not being irritating. You’re being evasive.” You only get another grunt in response. Fed up, your frustration at his lack of an explanation starts to seep into your tone. “So, what? I’m just supposed to ice that nice guy out because you say so?”
When Roy finally looks at you, he’s scowling. “He’s not fucking nice,” he says. “And you don’t know anything.”
“I don’t know anything because you won’t tell me,” you argue. 
“My word’s not good enough?”
You glare at him. “Your word hasn’t been good enough in eight fucking years.”
Roy shakes his head, almost in disbelief. “Definitely not telling you now.”
“Okay, enough,” you say, scanning the room and the hall to make sure no one’s watching the two of you. You put a hand up before he can retaliate with anything. “Look, if this is gonna work, you have to tell me things, okay? And we can’t argue here. Not here.” You motion to the office around you. “I can’t work with that shit. Alright?”
For a moment, it’s like you can look into Roy’s mind. You watch him appear to recount last week’s talk, just as you did minutes ago. Professional. Civil. No issues.
“Fine,” he finally sighs, knowing you’re right. 
“Fine,” you reply. You take a breath. “So, if he sucks and you don’t want me to talk to him, you need to tell me why. You can’t just order me around like I’m one of the guys, especially not in front of people. I’m your equal here, Roy. Whether you like it or not.”
Roy shakes his head. “You’ve always been my equal,” he says, though it’s a bit softer. “You fucking know that.”
His words leave a lump in your throat that you’re not anticipating. “Well, you’re not acting like it.”
His head tilts back, eyes falling shut. His shoulders tense up. Heavy sigh. Dear God, he really doesn’t want to tell you, huh?
And then it hits you. Oh, fuck does it hit you. He doesn’t want to tell you. 
And you get why.
Roy’s talking as soon as you open your mouth to apologize for pushing him. “The others don’t know either. I’ll tell you when I tell them,” he offers. “That’s the fucking best you’re getting from me.”
Your tongue feels heavy in your mouth, so you offer a nod. “Fine,” you say softly.
The nod is returned. “Fine.”
The conversation feels finished, but there’s still one more thing you want to say. “And can we agree right here that we’re not going to argue in front of anyone? Just like you said?” you ask. “Like, if you want to pick a fight, just like, pull me into the Boot Room or something. This shit can’t affect the way we do our jobs.”
Humor slants Roy’s expression. “Boot Room fights?”
You roll your eyes. “You know what I mean. Not in front of the team.”
“Yeah, I got it,” he says with a nod. “Fine.”
“Fine.”
From the outside of the office, you can hear the team start to file into the locker room from their gym facility, laughing just the same as when you heard them earlier. The alone sound makes you tense up. Roy narrows his eyes at you. 
“Speaking of,” he says cautiously. “I think it might be time for your introduction. Hope you like primary school-level art done by grown fucking men.”
That takes you out of your headspace immediately. “I’m sorry, what?”
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LONDON OLYMPICS. (LATE JULY, 2012.)
Mabley Green. Friday. 23:30.
Wear some training gear.
I can send a car for you so you know you’re not being murdered.
You’d read the three messages you’d received two days ago from Roy Kent about a million times. While you’d replied to him that his sending a car felt very mafia boss and definitely doesn’t eliminate the murder possibility, you’d still gathered up the courage to dress up in your nicest sweats, escape from the Village after the Opening Ceremony festivities, and meet his driver on the outskirts.
(Of course, you said yes to the driver. Roy Kent was fucking loaded and if he were going to be strange and summon you places, you were going to take his free transportation.)
You’d confirmed your whereabouts and situation approximately thirty-five thousand times to Mel, who had nothing but questions for you. 
“Roy Kent. Like Chelsea’s finest, here, there, every fucking where Roy Kent?” That’s the one.
“Is sending a car for you to go to where?” I don’t know, it looks like a soccer field. 
“To do what?” Battle Pokemon. I don’t fucking know, Mel. I think he wants to train me.
“Train you or train you?” Why are you saying it like that?
“Because this has to be a weird hook-up thing that famous footballers do, right?” He made it very clear he had no interest. Also, pause. What about me says I’d fuck on a pitch?
“He could bring an air mattress.” Oh my God, I’m leaving.
But as you arrived to this completely empty field, with nobody but your overly friendly driver, Roger to back you up, you couldn’t help but feel a little nervous. This was weird, wasn’t it? You were meeting up with this guy you barely knew at an abandoned location just because he told you that you were an overthinker? Your mother would be absolutely horrified if she knew. You’d broken just about every Stranger Danger rule she’d set.
However, the second that you stepped out of the car to see Roy illuminated by the field lights, standing with his hood up and a bag of footballs thrown over his shoulder, you knew this was legit. And the anxiety washed away. But a few of the nerves stayed.
“Glad you showed,” he greets, turning to walk to the field as you fell into step with him.
You look over at him expectantly. “So, you are coaching me.”
“No, I’m fucking not,” he says. “I just want to get you out of your head.”
You nod in faux agreement. “Right. Because that’s not coaching.”
Roy rolls his eyes. “No, it’s not. It’s called being a nice fucking person.” 
“Right,” you say again. “Because Roy Kent is known best for his kindness.”
He turns to you. Something sparks in you when you notice that he appears to be humored by all of this. “You should be thanking me.”
“Of course. I’m sorry,” you apologize, sending him a wide smile as you two make it to the field. “Thank you, Coach.” Roy rolls his eyes again and you chuckle softly. “I’ll thank you when I know for a fact you’re not gonna murder me.”
He watches as you plop yourself down on the pitch to stretch a bit. “If I was going to kill you, I wouldn’t have brought a fucking witness.”
“I don’t know,” you shrug. “Roger could be your Ryan Gosling.”
Roy actually laughs at that one. It’s a sound that you’d never expected to hear, but you’d be lying if you said you didn’t want to hear it again. “I wouldn’t trust him to do that kind of driving. Chatty prick can barely get around London.”
“Hey,” you chide. “He was very nice.”
“He’s fucking incredible. Been with him since my Sunderland days. Still a chatty prick.”
You can’t help but smile at the fondness that’s crept into his voice, but you say nothing about it. You bring your knee to your chest in a stretch and look up at him. “So, what’s the plan here, Coach?”
“Not your coach.”
“Right, sorry. What’s the plan here, Zodiac?”
Roy shakes his head, fighting to keep his lips even. “I want to make a deal with you.”
“A deal?” you ask. “What kind of deal?”
“I’ll train with you until your team's out,” he says. “Whenever our match schedules align, we can figure out a time to do shit until you need to go home.”
Your smile turns cocky. “And if we win?”
He practically snorts. “You’re not going to win.”
“But if we do?”
“Then we’ll train until then,” he replies. “And I’ll give you whatever you fucking want.”
You’re not sure what that entails, but anything you want from Roy fucking Kent? It’s an offer that may be too good to pass up. But still, one question lingers. “In exchange for what?”
“What?” he asks.
You stand, lifting one of your feet from the ground so that you can pull it up behind you in another stretch. “A deal works two ways. Exchanging goods or services and all that,” you tell him. “What’s in it for you?”
Roy shrugs. “I need to train too,” he answers. It's a bit simple, a bit evasive. “That’s what’s in it for me.”
“Oh, c’mon,” you say, “you can’t be serious. You want to train with me just to train?”
“What’s wrong with that?” he asked, crossing his arms.
“Nothing,” you respond, slowly realizing he’s serious. “I guess I just kind of assumed when I heard ‘deal’ that you’d want something in return.”
“Well, that’s all I fucking want,” he tells you. “If I think of anything else you can do for me, I’ll let you know.” 
A mix between a scoff and a laugh escapes you. “I’ll be anxiously anticipating your demands.”
He’s turned to his bag of footballs and crouches to grab one, glancing up at you as he rises. “So?” he asks. “Do we have a fucking deal, or what?”
Your foot goes down as you look at him, evaluating him and his offer. You shift your gaze to the field, to the big lights around you, then to the night sky that tells you it’s almost the next day. 
You have a game in Glasgow again tomorrow against Colombia. You’re out past curfew and know your team would both kill you and congratulate you if they knew where you were. You have to be on a bus in less than eight hours. 
But here’s Roy Kent, standing with you on an abandoned pitch in London, offering to train with you. And what kind of idiot passes that up?
“Deal,” you agree, taking the ball from his hand. “Now, where do we start?”
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(mini!) TAGLIST: @tegan8314, @csigeoblue, @confessionsofatotaldramaslut
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skyeblue8 · 6 months
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ᗯι𝜏ԋ Ɛʋҽɾყ Ɲҽցα𝜏ιʋҽട, ㆜ԋҽɾҽ 𝓐ɾҽ Sσ𝓶ҽ Ƥσടι𝜏ιʋҽട... ♚
⋆⋆⃟⊱✪⃝⃞⃝⊰⋆⃟⋆ ⋆⋆⃟⊱✪⃝⃞⃝⊰ ⋆⃟⋆⋆⋆⃟⊱✪⃝⃞⃝⊰ ⋆⋆⃟⊱✪⃝⃞⃝⊰⋆⃟⋆
So, because I'm in a bit of a shitty mood due to a whole lot of work I have to do before my break, and I don't feel like piling onto the already large list of what's wrong with the Helluva Boss series - and also, because everyone liked the Beelzebub list, I decided to do a quick list of my top five favorite songs from Helluva Boss. Despite the questionable writing, characters, world-building, creator, etc, the songs are actually truly solid when they want to be, and for that, I'm willing to give praise.
𝟏.❞𝕂𝕝𝕠𝕨𝕟 𝔹𝕚𝕥𝕔𝕙❞ 𝐛𝐲, 𝐆𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐳 & 𝐆𝐥𝐚𝐦
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❥ Putting aside my general love for these girls, however brief their appearances were in the episode, this song was just incredible to me! The dancing was smooth, the beat was heavily reminiscent to Kpop, which I just love anyway, the visuals were stunning, in addition to their overall designs, and I'm honestly just sucker for fish-based characters since they have a whole siren aesthetic going on. Speaking of, many people find these twins to be reminiscent to The Dazzlings, from EQ Girls, and that's just the cherry on top for me! The full version truly makes this even better and, overall, I think the song was brilliant in establishing the whole rebranding of Mammon and how these two pose great threats to Fizz, much like those badass singer villains in Saturday morning shows. You know, the one's everyone ends up simping for at some point in their childhood. Anyway, because of the new episode, this song managed to shoot its way to the top of my faves, knocking down my original fave in the process!
𝟐. ❞𝕄𝕠𝕟𝕤𝕥𝕖𝕣❜𝕤 𝔹𝕒𝕝𝕝❞𝐁𝐲, 𝐁𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐳𝐞𝐛𝐮𝐛
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❥ This song walked, so "Cotton Candy" could trip and fall on the scalding hot pavement. Apologies if I sound dramatic, and you happen to like Cotton Candy, but the amount of disappointment I feel towards the fact that we didn't get this song is indescribable. Now of course, I understand WHY we couldn't (again, waste of time when someone could've just gotten Rochelle in the first place 😑) but I digress. Aside from the fact that a specific line in the song gives clear clarification of who the hell the flying fox is, it feels like the cool, degenerative (said affectionately) party girl song that I would've actually liked to hear.
❥ To me, it's reminiscent of "Cannibal" and "Die Young", and I feel like both themes generally tie into what we think of a Modern Beelzebub to be like. The beat, the shift in pace of the lyrics that brings out the fast party vibe, the fact that it felt like a real pop song that didn't take fifteen minutes to get through just to see the rest of the episode – all these are what made this song my former #1 favorite, now my #2. And the "non-binary specimen" line was a cool, quick inclusion to me.
𝟑. ❞𝕁𝕦𝕘𝕘𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕀𝕫 ℂ𝕠𝕠𝕝❞ 𝐛𝐲, 𝐌𝐚𝐦𝐦𝐨𝐧
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❥ I know this is technically too small to be an actual full song, but I still loved it regardless. It was really cool in its short runtime for the following reasons: the Tom Hardy's vocals (idk what it is, but something about Australian accents that just sounds satisfying, especially when singing), the praising of the Twins, and the satisfaction of seeing Fizz squirm a bit. Apologies to any of you who like Fizz. I don't hate him per se, but rather, I'm just bitter that we're loosing out on other character development because of him and Ozzy. And, I prefered Robo Fizz who was an unrelenting asshole and not another UWU boy that, imo, there are one too many of in Hell.
❥ Anyway, it was cool seeing more visuals of the Greed Ring stage. And seeing the spider visuals that are associated with Mammon. I understand if some people thought it was kinda tacky, but I personally think it could work if assessed the right way. (Hint: I'll be explaining more about this in later Greed Ring Headcanons and/or Mammon Headcanons.)
𝟒. ❞𝕍𝕒𝕔𝕒𝕪 𝕥𝕠 𝔹𝕠𝕟𝕖𝕥𝕠𝕨𝕟❞ 𝐛𝐲, 𝐕𝐞𝐫𝐨𝐬𝐢𝐤𝐚 𝐌𝐚𝐲𝐝𝐚𝐲
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❥ Admittedly, I was a bit iffy on whether or not I should include this considering my feelings on Verosika. I don't hate her by any means considering, you know, it's Blitzø, but she has nothing going on for her and her one note personality just feels unfair to her considering what she had to deal with. That being said, I realized that I'm judging based on musical appeal and not entirely on character, so I said "fuck it" and put this as #4.
❥ While notably slower and softer than the other songs, I enjoyed it after revisiting it. The pink aesthetic and visuals were just gorgeous to me.
❥ It's slow, playful, and it reminds me a lot of Doja Cat and her songs, and I really loved that. Above all else, it was soothing and nice, and I feel like it was wasted on the Spring Break episode though as, while the episode introduced it a bit more worldbuilding, it felt like a whole load of nothing considering it all happened in one place and that same worldbuilding went out the window almost immediately. Still love the song though. Honestly, if there was a musical battle between Verosika and the Twins, I'd struggle to pick a winner.
𝟓. ❞ℍ𝕠𝕦𝕤𝕖 𝕠𝕗 𝔸𝕤𝕞𝕠𝕕𝕖𝕦𝕤❞ 𝐛𝐲, 𝐀𝐬𝐦𝐨𝐝𝐞𝐮𝐬 & 𝐅𝐢𝐳𝐳
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❥ While my opinion of Asmodeus has wavered lately, his debut song was incredible! I loved the deep vocals and jazzy tunes used in the song, and I didn't completely mind the bits with Fizz in it given all that's happened. Above all else, I adored how they called out Stolas publically in the episode. Shame it couldn't stay that way. Seriously though, as sexy as the man's voice is his design just doesn't fit that. But, yeah, that's my opinion.
⋆⋆⃟⊱✪⃝⃞⃝⊰⋆⃟⋆ ⋆⋆⃟⊱✪⃝⃞⃝⊰ ⋆⃟⋆⋆⋆⃟⊱✪⃝⃞⃝⊰ ⋆⋆⃟⊱✪⃝⃞⃝⊰⋆⃟⋆
Anyway, yeah, that was my list. Let me know what y'all think and whether or not you agree with my choices. If any, do you have a favorite song in Helluva Boss? Or a least favorite? Let me know. ✌🏾
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gidget-claws · 1 year
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"Should we start lovin', give this a try?
You got baggage, but so do I."
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(Lyrics: Baggage by Rare Americans)
Alts under read more
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Honestly might give HC Aki's voice as the lead singer of Rare Americans even tho I was originally gonna give them an Australian accent with them being a flying fox bat which are found in Australia- their vibe is just Rare Americans lmao
Mostly drew this for drawing Donnie and Aki on techwear fits cause it matches them
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