Tumgik
#5sos fan fiction
bartxnhood · 1 year
Text
wanna be yours | l.h
Tumblr media
luke hemmings x fem!reader
summary: luke had his eyes on you from the moment you met him so, it killed him when you couldn’t take the hint that he was in love with you.
warnings: two oblivious people in love, my bad writing, mentions of a lot of drinking
a/n: someone asked for jealous and protective luke ??? say no more. feedback is appreciated ! ALSO didn’t exactly turn out how i originally thought but it’s a good start !! enjoy !!
requests open
not proofread
Copyright © 2023 bartxnhood. All rights reserved. This original work is not allowed to be reposted on any platform in any format.
✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵
there is a scene in a movie where the lead character and the love interest lock eyes.
they lose sight of everything around them, leaving just each other in focus. you never liked seeing those kinds of movies, thought it was cliche, and never believed in love at first sight. if you're being honest, it was overdone, unrealistic, and plain annoying.
but, it was fate that it would fall on you.
you didn't enjoy parties because there were too many people there, you didn't like drinking, and people were making out all over the place, some of whom were newlyweds and others who were having affairs. you hated being messy, and gatherings were messy. also, you made an effort to limit the number of your friends because you found it uncomfortable to be surrounded by so many people.
but ashton, your best friend, pleaded with you to attend this particular gathering. hours would pass, and just when you thought he had finished pleading, he would resume. so you gave in.
that’s how you found yourself at ashton's house, sitting in your car, staring at your phone, and observing the passing of time. It had been over fifteen minutes since you had first decided whether or not to do this. hearing the faint music emanating from the house, your chest felt constricted. you pushed open the car door and walked over to the home. attempting to summon the guts to enter by standing outside the front door.
when the door opened, there was a strong odor of alcohol, as well as loud music and conversation. while searching among the throng of individuals swaying their bodies against one another to find your friend, you regretted your decision to agree. when you eventually located the man after searching the kitchen, the other person standing by his side immediately caught your eye.
everything around you vanished in an instant, leaving you only able to concentrate on the man with whom you had just locked eyes. wonderfully curled hair, flawless skin, eyes the color of the sea, and just enough of his white silk shirt's buttons were undone to make you flustered. he was stunning. all of a sudden, the room contained only you and him. there was only you and him; nothing else or anyone else was important.
but you were pulled from that thought As ashton grabbed your wrist and said, "cmon!", you were jolted out of your trance-like state. ”i gotta introduce you to everyone!" the australian cheered and dragged you into the kitchen where everyone was standing; all of a sudden, you were the center of attention. you waved to the small group of people while saying, "guys, this is my amazing friend, y/n," feeling a little uncomfortable at the unexpected focus. “y/n, this is calum, michael, crystal, sierra, and luke,” ashton said as he made an introduction.
the small group of individuals exchanged smiles, and you shook hands with each person before approaching luke with a gentle "hello."
wow.
your palm touched his, you prayed he wouldn't notice your flushed cheeks, and you both nodded. he was the most stunningly handsome person you had ever seen, by a long shot. ashton once again grabbed your arm away and dragged you out of the kitchen before you had a chance to continue admiring his attractiveness. while waving the group off, you glanced over your shoulder. You weren't angry with ashton since he knew you'd never tried something like this and that you were making a big step by doing so. he also needed a reason to prove to his buddies that you were real and an important part of his life.
at night's end, you were sitting in ashton's backyard, lounging around the pool, admiring the reflection as lights danced across the water of the pool. even though roughly half of the people left, music continued to play. people said he would always throw the nicest parties, and now you understood why. but you simply weren't made for this situation; you were too uncomfortable and worn out from engaging with everyone for so long. You simply wanted to return home, binge-watch your favorite movie in the coziness of your bed, and eat some frozen pizza.
the word "hey" surprised you and made you flinch just a little. your eyes landed on the person standing above you, holding one cup while concealing the other in his pocket. luke apologized for the quick response, "oh, sorry, i thought you heard me," but you just shook your head. you shrugged and turned to face the swimming pool, saying, "no, it's alright, was just thinking." there was a little period of silence since neither of you knew exactly what to say. you had just recently met. “do you want a drink?” he asked. “oh, no thanks,” you said as you once again looked up at him. “i'm not really a drinker.” the blonde let out a gentle laugh. "but you came a party?" while scratching your forehead, you chuckled alongside him. “well, ashton is a push-“ over. yeah. that he is," luke continued your sentence and you laughed. “i think i’m heading home now, im way too tired to stay much longer”. you got out of the lawn chair facing luke.
his mind began racings, he didn’t want the conversation to end just yet. he had to think of something so he could see you more. “do you need a ride?”
your hands were crossed, and your eyes darted back to his and then to the cup in his grasp. "thanks for the offer, but I just live ten minutes away," you said. he extended his hand to you after giving you a nod and pulling it from his pocket. “it was lovely meeting you, y/n,” “you too, luke”
you had no intention of seeing luke again after that. you had your friend group, ashton had his own, and you happened to be a part of both. you had no intention of ever returning to another party unless you absolutely had to be there; that atmosphere wasn't for you. it was too much for you, and you just wished ashton would be more considerate of your decision. you knew he wanted you around; you'd been best friends since high school, and it was difficult for you both to have separate lives.
but fate had something else in store for you.
it was subtle when you first became aware of his presence. you ran into him a few times in town, which wasn't unusual. but then he'd show up at your job, or he'd find his way into the same restaurant you were in. it was amusing at first because what are the chances you'd keep meeting like this?
so you confronted him one day. “you know, if you keep this up you’ll have to take me out for coffee” you started, putting down the record you pick up. this was one of the many times you had run into luke while running errands. this time, the both of you ended up in a local record store. you heard him chuckle softly before turning to you, “are you asking me out on a date?” he leans against the shelf raising his eyebrow. you shrug, “more like telling you to take me out” he nods, leaning in closer. “i see..then i guess i’ll see you tomorrow?”
you and luke are two opposites but somehow you two hit it off
he drinks while you don’t.
despite your differences, you detested parties, and luke's life was spent drinking; not you. you've never thought that opposites attract. yet it was odd because as time went on, you discovered that you were rather similar. you and luke had a lot in common, and you got along just well. it was never dull or tiring since the two of you could converse for as long as it took, even until the sun rose. you frequently found yourself stranded in ashton's or calum's backyard, relaxing on the chairs after talking until the wee hours of the morning like you were adolescents.
each time the two of you are in close contact, there is tension. You adored the quiet glances you two shared. It was much more enjoyable because it seemed as though the two of you were barred from being together.
It was never meant to go this far. You'd been hanging out with Luke for quite some time. you've been wanting to be with him every other day for at least a few months now, waiting for his texts or calls saying he wanted to hang out or if he found a new restaurant he thinks you'd like. or the way he'd subconsciously hold the small of you back while leading you through a crowded area, or how he'd always go out of his way to make sure you got home safely.
it was never supposed to escalate this quickly.
you found yourself wanting to hang out with him even more, wondering if Luke would be there when ashton asked you to hang out. You started thinking about him all the time.
that's when it started getting more complicated. you knew something between you changed after being with him so long. and although you knew how it changed you, you were too scared to jeopardize anything between you not when it was fresh.
truthfully, you just displayed to him, that you'd always be available. you could say no to anyone who had ever asked you out because of your newfound feelings for luke. but you couldn't tell him that, it was too soon. but even then, you couldn't get the sound of his laugh out of your mind, or the way your name rolled off his tongue like it was meant to be there. you couldn't stop picturing what it would be like to lay in his arms, limbs tangled together as he sang you the sweetest lullaby.
unknown to you, luke made an effort to avoid you in the beginning because he knew he couldn't control himself with you. no matter how hard he tried to hide himself from you or push you away, you always managed to find a way into his head like an addictive substance. as you were the most gorgeous person he had ever seen, he wanted to shield you from all harm and evil in the world and would do whatever it took to ensure that everyone knew the two of you belonged together.
but, did you know that?
you began to watch him from then on, looking for clues that could point you in the right direction. you'd noticed him fiddling with his rings, then grazing over the leg of his jeans or joggers, slipping his hand between you on the couch. his hand would inch across the seat, pausing now and then. then he'd retreat without much thought, preferring to rest his hand on his thigh rather than bother with yours.
nothing would have made you happier than to come across his hand. any action would be preferable to simply waiting for him to take the initiative and pleading with your eyes as if it would help. you contemplated inviting him over, striking up a conversation, or even touching his hand. Instead, you remained silent despite your strong desire to speak but your inability to do so.
you have no idea how or why you began to feel more confident around luke; you were the shy and reserved friend before meeting him, but you changed completely after meeting him. and you knew people would judge you for it, saying things like, "oh, i can't believe you'd changed yourself for a guy!" however, this was not the case. he made you feel something that you couldn't put into words. maybe he inspired you to be someone you've never been before.
you were standing outside ashton's door, picking at your nails, debating whether this was a good idea. you were dressed differently than usual, wearing a tight dress with a large leather jacket over it to try to hide your body.
something like this was extremely unusual for you, and you may have been an idiot to dress like this for a man who probably only thought of you as a friend. but it had to be worth a shot, right?
you let yourself in, the music was blaring and the pungent smell of liquor was all too familiar to you. you pushed through the people and eventually got to ashton’s living room where everyone else was. they all cheered and greeted you.
ashton hugged you first and said a bunch of drunk incoherent words about how happy he was to see you. then you greeted luke with a warm while which he reciprocated. “happy birthday luke” you said, he nodded. “thank you, y/n”.
after the small reunion, the group dissolved. everyone was off doing their own thing. you found yourself standing outside, a cup in your hand filled with whatever you found. the night air was a bit chilly which caused you to curse at yourself mentally for wearing such a short dress.
“you look nice.” luke’s voice rang as he came up behind you. You looked over your shoulder and spotted him. “thanks.” you smiled, and he raised his eyebrow. “you dress up that pretty for me?” he was standing next to you now, his comment and proximity were enough to make you blush. “and what if i did?” you retorted. luke smirked, “i’d be thankful because you look so good in that dress.”
he leaned closer, keeping eye contact with you.
he was so close to you that your heart began to beat quickly. you were attempting to read him while his eyes were staring right through you. there are two possible outcomes here. one of two things will happen: either someone will interrupt you like in a cliché movie, or he has the ideal opportunity to kiss you right now.
he leans in even closer, saying, "i'd even say that you should start dressing like this too, it suits you." you felt the blood rush to your cheeks.
kiss me. please. just do it
you wanted him to make the first move because this moment had the chance to change everything. you didn't want to appear so desperate. luke must have noticed your begging expression because he started leaning in again, this time only a few centimeters from your lips.
oh, god. it’s happening. it’s happen-
“come on man, it's time for you to open your presents!" michael interrupted the situation by shouting from the kitchen. you sighed as you saw luke leave. you could almost sense the disappointment in his eyes as he turned to look at you to check if you were following him.
“okay, and it seems the last one is from….y/n!” michael and calum handed over the large box to luke.
luke unwrapped the box, displaying the guitar case as you watched. he looked perplexed as he tried to imagine what you may have given him. the one guitar he had been dreaming about was waiting for him when he opened the case. "y/n.." He takes the guitar in his hands and places it on his lap.
everyone who was gathered around him suddenly turned to look at you. he is the last one to do so.
"you bought this?" He asks, and you nod while beaming broadly. he had never looked so startled to you. how did you know, exactly? “how…how did you?” he trailed off.
"well, you talked about it for so long, and occasionally i caught you looking it up. so i thought, why not get it for you?“ you responded.
luke stood up and hurried to you after putting the red guitar back in its case. you were engulfed by his arms, spinning you. "im grateful. I have never gotten a present better than that. I promise i’ll treasure it” he smiles, “i know you will luke”.
and for the rest of the night, everything went great. until it didn’t.
"y/n," ashton said, pulling you out of your thoughts.
"hm?" he had a mischievous smile on his face as you dropped your phone to your lap. "have you ever tried playing the drums?" "no?" you shook your head. It came out as a question as if you were asking yourself a question. "why?" he approached you and reached for your wrist. "you're about to!"
ashton was perched on the stool and sat you down on his lap, having handed you his drumsticks and demonstrated how to hold them properly as his hands caressed yours. he explained that he would only have you play a simple beat. he taught you the basics and then let you play a few beats on your own. you didn't notice how close ashton was, how his breath tickled your spine, or how delicately his hand held yours.
you two were laughing because you couldn't play because you had almost no rhythm. "this is exactly why you guys are musicians," you laughed, rising from ashton's lap and returning his sticks. "nah, practice enough and you'll get good enough to join the band," he winked.
luke watched the scene unfold in front of him, how close ashton was, the way he eyed you like you were some kind of prey. his hand was supporting his chin, his elbow was resting on the couch arm, and his jaw was locked. luke began tapping his finger impatiently against his cheek, were you so oblivious? everyone was making moves toward you, and you didn't even look at him? he pushed himself off the sofa and out of the room to get some fresh air. if he was in there any longer he would explode.
he hated the fact that, despite your lack of effort, you had him in your grasp. luke hated how near the guys were to you and how they treated you like they were hunting prey. how did you not notice how they eyed you? how the other boys treated you like some kind of object. especially ashton.
we’re you so oblivious to their advances? did you not see how luke wanted to rip you away from them and keep you all to himself?
did you even notice his attempts to try and win you?
He wanted the world to know how badly he wanted you, how you were his, and that despite his best efforts to deny it, he was falling in love with you. Luke had difficulty accepting it, but he would go to the ends of the earth for you.
“what was that about?” you ask, after watching luke exit the room. calum shrugged, “who knows. it’s luke” he didn’t look at you as he was nose deep in his phone. you looked around the room, everyone seemed not interested. “he probably left because ashton was feeling you up” someone added. you huffed, grabbed your jacket, and walked outside to the patio.
you saw his silhouette and walked up to him. “luke?” he didn’t respond and you walked closer. “lu?” you spoke the nickname you had given him. he finally turned back to look at you.
you saw that look in his eyes, the only look he had when looking at you. “luke, what’s going on? why’d you walk out like that? did i do something wrong?” his back was still turned to you, refusing to look at you. “you just don’t get it, do you?” he still wouldn’t face you. “get what, luke? the fact that you’re ignoring me in front of everyone and leaving me in the dark.” you were feeling frustrated, upset that he wouldn’t even look at you. “god, luke, just look at me!” you grabbed his arm, spinning him around so he’d have to look at you now.
“talk to me.” you pleaded. your eyes begging as you stared into his blue eyes. luke hated it, he hated how you had him in the palm of your hand ready to do anything for you if you’d just say the words. he detested that no matter how hard he tried, it would always be you. “oh, baby,” his hand caressed your cheek. “don’t make me spell it out for you…you know i want you”
“what?” you were only able to mutter, feeling the heat take over your face. maybe it was the liquor, or maybe it just was the fact that he said those words. you opened your mouth to say something but he cut you off. “every fucking day, I wish you were mine- every single goddamned day.”
you removed his hand from your cheek, silently missing his touch. “how was i supposed to know you felt more for me than just a friend, lu?” you saw his brows furrow. “you never explicitly told me, you wanted me..why?” you trailed off, you watched as he tried to come up with an explanation. “you never, ever, use your words like.”
you watched as he examined your face. you were mad but calm. it scared him, we’re you about to reject him? “for someone who writes songs for his job, he would be able to express his feelings freely. i guess not.”
“how did you expect me to decipher the hundred different ways you look in my direction? this isn’t just on me yknow. luke goes quiet, his eyes looking deeper into your eyes than before.
“i thought my actions would say all they needed to” you reply, “i thought you were just acting as a friend? you and all the guys act the same” luke locks his jaw, balling his fits by his side. “they act that way because they want to fuck you y/n.” you look taken aback legging out a scoff.
“so what about you, then?” “what about me?” “are you acting this way because you want to fuck me?” you smirk as luke realizes he backed himself into a corner.
“i—no? that’s not what—fuck.” he runs his hand through his hair. “let me start over. y/n, i’m sorry i wasn’t honest and i’m sorry i didn’t use my words. but i want you more than a friend should and i need to know, do you want me that way too?” you try to hide your smile while you step closer and wrap your arms around his neck. “see now was that so hard?”
he looks down at you, raising his eyebrow. “you didn’t answer the question.” you let the smile take over fully. “luke hemmings i have been tripping over my feet since the day we first met. yes, i very much want you too.”
he tucked a strand of your hair behind your ear, allowing him to peck your lips. “i was hoping you’d say that”
(and you can predict the end u filthy ppl<3)
665 notes · View notes
Text
Long, long time | L.H
luke hemmings x reader
Tumblr media
summary: you don't know how much longer you can cope with luke being on tour
warnings: panic attack, anxiety, angst with comfort, hurt/comfort, fem reader, reader is really going through it, very brief mention of lack of appetite, bit of poor self hygiene, not proofread
a/n: first time posting on tumblr despite being on here for years. literally terrified, also how god damn good is the feeling of falling upwards live album. i started levitating, don't get me started on os/co i could write a whole essay. also the ending is so rushed it's not funny but i couldn't think of an ending.
plus, the ending was my grandparents wedding song and i think it's so romantic so i put it in.
~~
It was early. The night had kept you awake, closing your eyes meant seeing every mistake you had ever made play in your mind. The curtains on your window were left open, the empty street and faint stars mocking your every move. The dim streetlight was your only source of light, and something about it was wrong.
It had been two weeks of this, of constantly shaking hands and always looking over your shoulder. Showering took more effort than it should, you had a never ending stomach ache, it felt like you didn't need to eat or drink. Your brain had been on constant overdrive for so long that it didn't know how to switch off, and it felt like there were rubber bands, squeezing around your chest and your brain, getting tighter and tighter by the minute.
For two weeks, you had done the same thing each night. Sitting up in bed, crossing your legs under your thick blanket and rocking, back and forth and back and forth. Your hands found your hair. It was greasier than you realised. How long had it been since you washed it? Stretching out your fingers, they felt wrong. They look different then you remembered. How long had it been since you had looked at yourself? Your hands find your knees, gripping onto them as you continue to rock.
You really don't want to. But you know you should. Where is he today? What even is the date today? When did you last talk to him?
Oh, his voice. His sweet, sweet voice. What would he say if he saw you like this? And this bed. This bed is far too big without him in it.
Luke is worried as well. You last spoke three days ago, and it was only texting. Usually you facetime every night, but he hasn't seen your face in just over a week. He wonders if you are busy, are you seeing your friends, are you working more?
If you squeeze your eyes shut, you can see him. He is sitting on the bed in front of you, he is holding you, he is smiling that gorgeous soft smile that he sends your way whenever you feel down. You can feel his hands rubbing up your arms in a soothing manner, his lips pressing against your forehead as the sweetest act of comfort.
You raise a hand to his side of the bed, dragging your hand along his pillow. No. No. The corner of your eyes prick.
Standing up on shaky legs, you stumble through the dark until you find your phone, face down on your floor, next to some discarded clothes. When did you let your bedroom get this filthy? The hands digging at your chest begin to dig their nails in. You kneel down, sitting on your heels and click your phone on. It's far too bright, it stings your eyes, but nonetheless you gaze lovingly at your lockscreen. At Him.
His beautiful blue eyes, warm and loving, and his gorgeous eyelashes, god he is blessed. His beautiful smile, halfway to a laugh, bringing a sad smile to your lips. Your eyes blur as you touch his cheek through your phone screen, a ragged breath coming from your chest.
You unlock your phone, blurry eyes and shaky hands pressing his contact, and the big green call button. It rings once, twice, three times, four times.
"Hey honey! You ok? Isn't it early at home?"
You don't respond. Your mouth hangs open in shock. He's alive. He's breathing. He's real, and you haven't imagined him. His voice is coming through your phone, he is on the other end and you can almost feel him.
A deep breath.
"Luke," You sob, "Luke."
"Oh, my girl."
You can hear voices becoming louder, and some clattering, a door closing and finally, just him.
"Baby, what's wrong?"
"It hurts, Luke. It really hurts."
"What hurts?"
"My chest. It's too tight and I can't breathe properly, and my brain is so sore, every time I move it stings and burns. And my skin is too tight on me, but it's too loose in some places, and I don't recognise myself and I'm so scared. I'm so tired, and I'm so scared, and I can't sleep, and the bed is too big and the house is too silent, and I need you."
You say it all in one breath, trying hard to regulate your breathing as you hold onto the phone for dear life.
"Ok, can we take some breaths together? Nice and slow. You're ok. You're safe."
You try to breathe, and eventually your chest opens up a bit. You open up your mouth to talk, but suddenly it's all mush. You sit together in silence for a bit. Speaking is too difficult. You click the phone onto speaker, and try to make your way back to bed.
"I'm right here baby, I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere."
You manage to groan out a response, pulling your blanket over your shaking body. Another sob escapes your lips, and you wrap your arms around your middle, pretending that you are anywhere else, that you are anybody else, that you have your boy with you.
"I'm so proud of you, you're so brave, can we keep taking some deep breaths? Just copy me."
You listen to his breathing through the phone and try to copy it, the pressure in your throat easing slightly.
"I love you so much. And I'm home so soon. So soon."
"Yeah. Not soon enough." A shaky inhale, a shaky exhale.
"Do you want me to sit with you for a bit? I can be quiet, or I can talk, whatever you need honey."
He is so patient. He is so kind. The first time he saw you have one of these, he sat in the dark in complete silence with you for threehours.
"Talk to me. I need to hear your voice."
And so he does. He talks about what you will do when he gets back. He talks about hearing you in all of his songs, and how he can't wait to hold you.
"I need you to come home soon, Lu. I think I'm fading again. I can't sleep. I need you."
He hears the tremor in your voice, your desolate tone, your sniffles, your slight stutter. He feels his heart break in two, knowing that he isn't there to hold you, to put you back together and smooth your skin.
"I know baby. Not long now, and I'm all yours for as long as you need, okay?"
"Okay. I'm really tired. Can you sing to me?"
And he doesn't hesitate. You swear you can hear the slight smile in his voice,
"Always."
"Never thought that you would be, standing here so close to me ,there's so much I feel that I should say, but words can wait until some other day"
His voice is sweet. His words linger in your head and your eyes drift closed.
"Kiss me once, then kiss me twice, then kiss me once again. It's been a long, long time. Haven't felt like this, my dear since I can't remember when. It's been a long, long time"
Your heart feels warm. You know that it will not be easy. You know that the next two weeks will be hard. But you know that you will see him soon. And you know that you can live when you're with him.
"You'll never know how many dreams I've dreamed about you. Or just how empty they all seemed without you. So kiss me once, then kiss me twice, then kiss me once again It's been a long, long time"
464 notes · View notes
lipringlrh · 1 year
Text
kiss you forever - lrh
summary: luke wants you to do his eyeliner for his show.
pairing: luke hemmings x genderneutral!reader
an: this won the poll thing i did so please lmk if you like it :)
word count: ~800
requested:
feedback appreciated!!
Tumblr media
You had barely reached the venue and Luke was already pulling you into his dressing room. He was hurrying around everywhere, stressing over every little detail.
He wasn't usually this anxious but he was playing in Sydney tonight and wanted everything to be perfect. His family was here and you'd be joining them shortly, you just couldn't help seeing Luke beforehand.
You were dragged towards the mirror and watched as he sat down in the twisty chair. He moved the height down so your head was above his and then proceed to grab a few items off the counter. He held them in one hand, reaching the other out to grab yours and manoeuvre you into standing between his legs. His head was just below yours, looking up at you. He grabbed your other hand, wrapping it around a thin tube, before taking the lid off for you.
You stared at him blankly, waiting for him to give you some instructions. He sighed, wrapping his hands around the hand which held the tube, pulling it towards his face. "Need you to do my eyeliner, angel."
You just looked at him, tilting your head to the side, trying to calm him and tease him at the same time. He sighed and pressed a kiss to the side of your face, "pretty please."
You nodded smiling, before focusing on his eyes. He had a pretty shimmer plastered all over the lids, and multiple dots from where he had failed to take off the previous failed attempts at the eyeliner.
You grabbed the wetwipe packet from the counter, taking one out and folding it into a small square. You dabbed it at where you could see the marks, making sure to miss out the eyeshadow as much as possible.
When you finished, you picked up the eyeshadow palette, hoping to reapply the product you took off. "Which shade did you use, lu? S'really pretty."
He pointed towards the shimmer in the top left and moved to grab the brush he used, then refocused back at you. You're sure that was the first time he took his eyes off of you since you started.
You reapplied the shadow quickly but carefully, Luke struggling to keep his eyes closed for the few seconds you needed him to. His hands found your waist, grabbing you and moving you ever so slightly closer.
You finished, and moved closer to him letting Luke pass you the eyeliner again. "What look are you going for?"
"M'thinking maybe a small wing? Subtle but you can tell it's there." You smiled up nodding at him. You reached your hands up to cup his face, bringing it closer to yours.
You brought the pen up to his face, beginning the eyeliner. You dragged his face closer again, making sure there's no chance you screw up.
You finished and turned his head to either side, double checking your work then admiring it and Luke simultaneously.
You had yet to realise the close proximity of your faces but Luke had. It took everything in him to not kiss you in that moment. You were holding his head up in your palm and he couldn't think of anything that could make him melt more.
His cheeks were stained a deep red and his eyes were flicking all around your face, from your lips to your eyes and back again. You noticed this, then how close you were, and felt your breath get stuck in your throat. You eyes were pinned on his lips, wanting nothing more than to kiss him. You needed to speak; to say anything, yet Luke consumed all your thoughts.
"You look so pretty, Lu." You whispered as though it was a promise. Your thumb was moving against his cheek, brushing over his lips, sending butterflies into his stomach.
"S'all you lovie." He whispered back, so quiet you almost missed it. He leaned in closer to you, tilting his head and letting his lips meet yours. It was soft and sweet, making warmth overtake your whole body. His hands moved from on your waist to wrap you in a hug, letting you move to rest one of your legs over his in the chair. You couldn't help but grin into the kiss as your stomach erupted.
You pulled away, hoping the feeling would linger on your lips. Luke's cheeks were burning, "I could kiss you forever, you know." You giggled in response, pulling his jaw up to meet you in a kiss once again. You let your fingers tangle in his hair, tugging slightly on his curls, letting you both get lost in the moment once more.
requests are open and feedback is appreciated!
595 notes · View notes
calumance · 1 year
Note
we’ve already established how logan doesn’t get much attention because he’s a middle child, so how about he gets suspended or something for fighting a kid who was picking on him and they all get into a blowout fight at home and logan says something like “you never cared before so i don’t see why it’s a big deal” or whatever you think is best and it kinda shocks cal into realizing like yeah i really haven’t been super present with him and then you can take it from there
Teenage angst is my absolute favorite thing. Especially when it comes to my little Logan. Enjoy!!
            Calum had been working in the studio when his wife busted through the door, surprising the absolute shit out of him. Quickly, he took off his headphones and questioned her silently. “Logan got suspended.”
            “I’m sorry?” Did he hear that correctly? It was only three weeks into the school year. It was the first year that Logan and Aiden were not in the same school. Aiden had graduated in May and was preparing to move up state for college. “He got, what?”
            “Suspended, we have to go pick him up.” Calum was still in shock, she was moving, but he wasn’t, “Now, Calum.” She said sternly, bringing him out of his thoughts.
            They didn’t talk their entire way to the school, or while they walked into the school, or while they were directed into the office where they found Logan sitting. Logan was sitting with his arms crossed against his chest, and he was looking away from his parents. The principle gestured for them to take a seat, and they obliged.
            “Thank you for coming on such short notice, Logan is being suspended for a week due to fighting with another student, but do not fret, both students have been suspended.” The principle laced his fingers together over his desk and smiled a closed lipped smile.
            That was absolutely the least of their concerns, fighting? Fighting about what? “I’m sorry, there was a fight? Like physical?” She asked while looking at Logan who continued to ignore both of his parents.
            The principle nodded, “Yes ma’am, it seems Logan got into a little bit of a tussle with another student today at lunch causing quite a stir in the lunch room. No one was hurt, but it caused quite the disruption so I think it is best to suspend both of them so they can calm down for a bit.” That’s where the conversation died. It was a silent agreement to keep Logan at home until next week.
            It was a silent drive home, it was almost eerie, that was until Calum decided to speak up when they got home. “Logan, what happened? Tell us your side of the story so we can understand.” That was the best thing he could’ve said. Could he have said it a bit softer, maybe, but he was confused and angry, so it came out harsher than intended.
            Logan tossed his backpack onto the floor and shrugged, “Didn’t the principle already cover that?” His back continued to be towards his parents.
            Calum looked at his wife for support, “Logan, we’re not mad, we’re just trying to figure out what’s going on, you’ve never acted like this, you’ve never gotten into trouble, so why now?” She took a step forward, reaching a hand out to her son.
            Logan spinning like a flash of lightning caused her to recoil, “You guys never cared before this, why should this be any different?” Again, he turned, but in the other direction and ran up the stairs to his room. Both Calum and his wife flinched when the door slammed shut.
            Hours passed, it had been almost silent in the house, aside from the occasional ‘what do you think happened?’ usually followed by a shrug from the other person. After another few moments of silence passed, they locked eyes and with a silent agreement, they made their way up the stairs towards to closed door.
            Silently, they argued over who was going to knock, Calum ended up being the one to knock after his wife pushed him into the door. He grimaced at her as he knocked a few more times after his noisy first announcement. There was a quiet voice on the other side of the door inviting both of them into the room.
            When they made it inside, Logan was slumped in his chair, a video game chaotically playing on the TV in front of him. Calum looked back at his wife and she nudged him forward and his cleared his throat before approaching his son. “Can you please tell us what happened today? Your mom and I are worried about you.”
            Logan scoffed and without tearing his eyes off the TV in front of him answered, “Why would you be worried? You’re barely home, it’s been like that since I was a kid.”
            It was at that moment that Calum and his wife looked at each other like they completely understood everything that was happening. Calum grabbed another chair and sat next to his son, “Aiden told us a few years ago that there were kids picking on you, were these same kids the ones that caused todays fight?” Logan aggressively pressed the buttons on his controller and Calum took that as a ‘yes.’ Calum sighed, he knew exactly what was happening. “Aiden wasn’t there to protect you, I’ve never been there to protect you, you think that no one cares about you.”
            Logan’s face visually dropped for a split second before he intently went back to his video game. Calum stood up and grabbed his wife’s shoulders, “Go downstairs, I’ve got this.” His kissed her cheek and shooed her away before turning back to Logan. Logan’s eyes darted towards his dads before he pretended that all of his attention was on the video game. “Do you remember the weekend Aiden went on the trip with your mom for school? It was before Bailey was born, before we even knew Bailey was going to happen.”
            Logan looked at Calum and pulled his eyebrows together, “Yeah, what about it?”
            Honestly, Calum couldn’t believe he remembered, it was nearly a decade ago, but at the same time, if Logan was dealing with Calum being gone then, then he’s still dealing with it now. “You felt the same way back then as you do now, and you were 5.” Logan paused long enough for his character to die in the game. Calum smirked before taking a seat next to him again. “You asked me then why I couldn’t stay home, and I told you that to take care of you and mama and Aiden, I had to be gone for work, do you still understand that?” Logan’s swallowed and Calum continued, “I know that being the middle child isn’t easy, it makes you feel like no one cares about you because suddenly everyone’s attention is on the baby, or whatever else, but, Logan, we still love you.” Again, his character in the game died. “I’m sorry it’s been rough without Aiden, maybe your mom and I can get you transferred to a different school.”
            “No,” Logan’s protest startled Calum, his head snapping towards his son, “I mean, it wouldn’t be the worst thing to happen. I am still getting picked on, I didn’t think you guys knew about it, you never made a big deal out of it.” Logan slunked back into his chair.
            “Logan, we never made a big deal out of it because Aiden told us he had control over it. It’s our faults for assuming that this year would be different. What can we do to help?” Calum rung his hand together and looked at Logan who was already shaking his head.
            It took a few seconds after he stopped shaking his head to form his thoughts, “These kids at my school make fun of me for having a dad who travels for a living, they tell me I basically don’t have a dad since you’re never here,” Calum’s heart sunk, “And I know that’s not true, because I know how you take the time to call me or FaceTime me, or take a red eye flight to be here for my band concert, or whatever, but all these…” he paused, “…Fucktards…” he looked at Calum apologetically, but Calum allowed it, “…see, is that you’re not always here.” Logan took a breath, “What happened today was one kid went as far to say that mom was cheating on you because who could be left alone that long, but I see what mom does without you, she cooks us dinner, she wakes us up in the morning, she makes us breakfast and lunch and then goes to work. She works her ass off, dad, and I just couldn’t listen to some kid who knows absolutely nothing about us talk that badly about my mom, and you too!” Logan was getting passionate at this point, sitting forward and dropping the controller to his gaming console on the ground, “I didn’t mean to hit him, it just happened!”
            It was hard, but Calum controlled his laughter as he pulled Logan in for the tightest hug he could’ve given the kid. “You’re not in trouble, you did the right thing, you stood up for your mom and that’s all that matters.” Logan nodded into Calum’s shoulder, “Why don’t you go downstairs and give your mom a hug and tell her you love and appreciate her?” There was little to no hesitation before Logan stood up and made his way out of the room. Calum sat back and ran his hands through his hair, proud of his son, and the kid he was becoming. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
taglist: @talkfastromance4
Let me know if you would like to be added to my tag list!
32 notes · View notes
wiiildflowerrr · 5 months
Text
niallhoran: an Irishman walked into a dressing room
23 November 2014
44 notes · View notes
Text
Had My Chances (c.h)
Pairing: Calum Hood x Fem! Reader
Requested? Yes, by the lovely @getsojaded
Summary: Based on the One Direction song "loved you first" Calum can't help but feel jealous to see you with another man.
Warnings: Angst! Language, mentions of alcohol, smoking. Some grammatical mistakes (English is not my first language, I'm sorry)
Word count: 4.6K
Author's note: I've finally wrote an angst that broke my heart again, and I'm so happy with it. Remember that REBLOGS are very IMPORTANT AND MEAN A LOT as well as COMMENTS AND INTERACTIONS. PLEASE SUPPORT YOUR WRITERS. Hope you like it and happy reading
My masterlist // taglist on bio!
Tumblr media
Calum was choking the hell out of his beer can, leaving the imprints of his fingers as evidence for the poor soul that had to clean this mess up later.
It was an unconscious type of thing - he’s been doing a lot of unconscious things lately, none of them his fault, he would argue - but the intent behind it is nothing innocent.
There was a time when he used to be the life of the party. Or at least a bit more vivid than just standing in a far-off corner glaring at someone who barely paid attention to him. He didn’t mean to glare or to even look in their direction, but it was impossible to take his eyes off them. It was almost as if he wanted to hurt so badly he’d find a way out of heartache. Battle fire with fire and those sorts of things.
“Okay, who are we hatin’?”
He didn’t even need to look to his right to know that Ashton was standing there even before he spoke. His friend - the ever more intuitive when it came to talking about heartbreak or breaking hearts - should already know the answer to his question, and Calum knows he knows. Ashton just wants him to admit it.
Still, Ashton followed his gaze till it landed on the target.
“Cal,” He sighed “You can’t keep doing this to yourself. Nor her, for that matter”
“I’m not doing anything” Calum mumbled into his drink.
“You’re overthinking”
“And you should mind your own business” He spat, leaving the poor, abused can on the shelf behind him.
Calum walked outside, trying to get some air before his hands started roaming through his pockets looking for his pack of cigarettes. He tried to quit it, and many times he tried in vain. There was always something that pulled him into the vice again. Tonight was the selfish need of having the power to hurt himself without people noticing. Something he could regret tomorrow. Something that didn’t involve making the mistake of spilling and saying what he should’ve said years ago.
The lighter provided the only gleam of the outsides that night. As Calum inhaled the toxins of his favorite weapon, he closed his eyes and hoped to wake up and let all of this be a dream. But that wish went away with the smoke he pulled out of his lungs, watching it disappear into the night till it merged with the stars above.
He was not a man used to not getting what he wanted. So is this a gut punch to his ego? Yes, of course. But had he not been in love for some time he’d believe that it’ll come to pass, ignoring the heart-wrenching reality of him not being able to lightly caress your hair with the tip of his fingers; or not care about how his body moved him toward your space every time you were around; or claim that the times you were both in a group laughing, he would stare at you, drinking on your reaction and getting drunk of your laugh, while you stared at someone else.
It was just usual for him not getting what he wanted. But this was beyond any desire of his. This, for a lack of better words, was beyond his reach. And he hated it. He hated every moment of it since the first time he realized it, hoping it’ll go away.
But what could he expect from falling for his best friend?
*
Calum always believed in past lives and how you’re meant to reconnect with people that have meant something important to you. Whether it was in the form of a mother, a father, a pet, a friend, a teacher, a lover… Soulmates will find their way.
He also believed that his brothers were his soulmates. He knows deep in his heart that Luke, Michael, Ashton, and himself were meant to meet in every life, making music and sharing their message across the world for other people to hear. He also believed that his dog, Duke, might’ve come to him as a guide. An old teacher who bound his life to appear in the moments he needed most. He believes that his family would always be his family, maybe in different ways, but they’ll always come together one way or another.
Now, there is one thing Calum isn’t sure of, and that is you.
What were you to him before? Why are you here with him? And why does he feel compelled to be your everything?
When you met years ago, Calum didn’t think much of that first encounter. You were just a friend of a friend, a normal acquaintance. But then you kept meeting each other, whether at a party or a concert. And every time you grew closer. Whether it was the jokes you shared, the similar tastes in music and movies, the way you made each other laugh, or the secret codes you accidentally created. He was just eighteen back then, but he knew it had to mean something.
He just couldn’t figure out what role you played in his life. Not yet, at least.
“I don’t think that because you had a bad experience with milk you become lactose intolerant,” You said casually as you applied your mascara in the mirror.
It was not unusual for Calum to find himself pressing the facetime button to call you every day now, especially given that he was on the other side of the country touring with his band. The calls would mostly consist of him telling you about his day and you doing the same as the two of you would go on with your lives as if you were in the same room together even though you’re miles apart.
The two of you would indulge in conversations that could be as deep as a puddle of water - as the one you’re having now - or as deep as the sea. Never once feeling uncomfortable or falling silent. And even in the quiet types of calls, when you only need to feel each other’s presence after a long day, you would embrace the silence as a comfort rather than an inconvenience.
And Calum loved that. He loved these little moments with you. It didn’t matter if they lasted two minutes or three hours. He just knew that talking to you was one of the top best moments of his day.
He just didn’t understand why yet
“I could be, though” He pouted, watching as you applied blush to your cheeks “And the next time you take me for ice cream I might die and it’ll be your fault for playing it down”
You chuckled “I don’t think that’s how it works, babe”
And there it was, that little, weird feeling that made him all warm and fuzzy inside, triggered by a nickname. Calum quickly swallowed it down, just marking it up as the victory that was to make you laugh.
Still, he changed the subject.
“Why are you getting all dolled up?” He asked. Ignoring the way Luke looked at him for a second before going back to playing subway surfers on his phone.
“I’m going out”
“Where?”
“Dinner I guess, probably dancing afterward” You shrugged, trying to decide on which lipstick would suit best with your outfit.
“Girls' night?”
“No, it’s more like a date, I think. Well, he didn’t actually say “date - date” but I mean, he did everything you do when you ask someone for a date and-” You looked at your phone screen “Are you okay?”
Only then did Calum realize he clenched his jaw. He blinked at you and disguised it with a fake yawn.
“I didn’t know you had a date,” He said, trying to sound uninterested, but Luke’s eyes on him told him he was a bullshit actor.
You didn’t seem to catch it, though.
“I told you I was going out with Jessie”
“I thought you meant Jessica”
“Does it matter?” You asked, cornering him to a wall - metaphorically.
Calum sighed “Nope, just be safe and have fun, alright?”
You rolled your eyes and sarcastically said “Yes, dad” as you applied some gloss. Just in time for the doorbell to ring “Oops, that’s him. Wish me luck!”
And it might’ve been your smile and the way your eyes lit up when the doorbell rang knowing it was Jessie on the other side, or it might’ve been the spoiled milk he had in his coffee earlier. But there was an uneasy, foreign feeling in Calum’s chest as you said goodbye. Almost as if he didn’t want you to go at all.
But that was crazy. It’s probably nothing. So he smiled tightly and said “Bye, Y/N/N” and watched as you faded away before the facetime call ended.
Calum closed his eyes for a moment, frowning upon discovering this sunken feeling in his chest.
However, it didn’t last much as Luke was suddenly blasting “Jessie’s girl” through the hotel room’s speakers. Calum - rightfully so - smacked him with a pillow.
“Shut up” He groaned.
“I didn’t say anything!” Luke laughed
“You were going to!”
“How the fuck should you know?!”
A string of grumbled curses left Calum’s lips as he got up from the bed and went through his suitcase.
“What are you doing?”
“I’m going out with Ash, wanna come?” He said, putting on a clean shirt.
“I didn’t know you were going out” Luke commented as he got up and went to find a shirt as well.
“We are now, c’mon”
To say the other two were surprised by Calum’s sudden need to go partying was an understatement given that Michael already was in his pajamas when the bassist went and knocked on their door, but neither of them was opposed to the idea. Soon, the whole band was dancing and drinking out at a club neither of them knew about one hour ago.
And if Calum was seen dancing and making out with a girl that looked like you, it was no one’s business but his own. And when he woke up next to a said girl a few hours later, no one needed to know.
*
The night was turning warmer, though that could be because of the alcohol and the three cigarettes he had since he came outside. The party was still in full swing but he wanted no part of that. Not when you were there with… him.
It’s stupid and he knows it. To have this unsolved grudge against you and every person you date.
You don’t owe him anything, no explanation or justification for any relationship you had or the one you were currently in. But he can’t help it. It’s just that every time he sees you wrapped around your partner’s arms he just wants to rip them off you and shield you from anyone’s eyes. From the moment he first noticed his feelings toward you it was clear that he couldn’t act on them to not ruin the relationship you two have.
He hates them. Every single one of them, every bloke that broke your heart or made you cry. He hates the ones you fell in love with, the ones that loved you back. The one that’s sitting on the couch next to you with his arms around your shoulder and the one that makes you laugh. He hates him the most and he’s not above showing it.
It’s not healthy but he doesn’t know how to stop.
“Why are you so protective of me?” You asked him once and he didn’t know how to tell you, so he made his heart quiet as his mind gave him a logical reason.
There were so many times when he could’ve fessed up and just tell you as it is. To make him the one that you would share your nights with instead of useless men who are not worthy of you.
Was he worthy of you?
Time for another cigarette.
*
Calum opened the door to find you there with a friendly smile; a pint of ice cream; a skin-care kit; and a bottle of wine. He couldn’t help but laugh as he stepped back so you could enter his house.
“I told you I’m fine,” He said, shaking his head as you made yourself comfortable on his couch, settling all the post-break-up necessities on the table.
“And I believe you,” You shrugged. “But I also know you, Cal. And you say you’re okay now but in a week it’ll all crash down as it always does because you bottle up your feelings. So let’s get them out of the way while we avoid the wreckage”
“I thought you didn’t even like her,” He said, sitting down next to you.
“I never said that!”
Calum gave you a look.
“I just didn’t think you were a good fit… that’s all” You confessed sheepishly.
Calum sighed “Well, you were right”
“I didn’t want to be” You scooted closer to him “I’m sorry, Cal. You truly seemed happy with her. And I liked seeing you happy”
He nodded but didn’t say anything. The break-up happened just a couple of days ago, and you were right when it came to talking about feelings now rather than later. But it was all so very new to him.
“I just- I never had a relationship like this before” He confessed.
“You really liked her, didn’t you?”
And yes, he did. For the first time in years, Calum could actually focus on a relationship. He had met his ex at a party, they talked all night and then he went home with her number saved on his phone. What followed were almost two years of amazing moments and memories filled with love but… something wasn’t right.
It wasn’t something any of them did, it just sort of happened. Blame the routine and the lack of effort from both parties, but they didn’t feel as if the relationship should continue. Yes, he would always feel something for her and would treasure those memories with care. Yet, he can’t say he’s sad and broken.
All his past relationships ended in heartbreak because his partners felt like a third wheel in their own relationships. And they had every right to break up with him. For all he knew, Calum just jumped into those relationships to get over you or to distract himself into loving another person that wasn’t you, all for nothing. Yet this relationship seemed like the real deal, the one that could actually sweep him off his feet and take his mind off of you, truly making him feel alive. And it worked until it didn’t. Until she called things off saying
“I don’t know if it’s me or if it’s you, but this is not working. We haven’t been working for a while now, have we?”
All he could do was agree and let her go. He loved her enough to do that without a fight. Or didn’t love her as he should. And maybe all she wanted was for him to fight for them, guess he let themselves down on that one. But if all these break-ups had something in common, is that you would always be there by his side to cheer him up.
“She deserves someone that can provide her with what she needs,” He said as you both sit with face masks and two glasses of wine filled to the brim “I guess it was not meant to be me”
“I’m sorry, Cal” You gave him a small, apologetic smile, while your hand went to his shoulder and squeezed it. His hand soon fell on top of yours “I’m proud of your decision, though, you and hers. It’s not healthy to be hung up in a relationship that’s just not going anywhere”
“Yeah, I know” He sighed, hiding the small smile that popped up when you didn’t retrieve your hand from his “It’s not like I’m heartbroken or anything, it’s just- I guess I’m just frustrated that we couldn’t make it work. None of my relationships seem to last because of that”
“Well, have you wondered why?” You sat up with interest, turning toward him and moving your hand to his thigh. Something completely innocent on your part, but that still made Calum’s heart beat a little bit faster.
“Of course I have”
“So what is keeping you from going after what you want in a relationship? Is it a previous heartbreak?”
“No… I don’t think I had one of those before” He said like a liar.
He knew that his heart was in perpetual mourning because of you, he was just too proud to admit it. All his past attempts at love were only meant to get over you and forget about the person you were currently hung up with.
Whenever you would tell him about a date or a new partner he’d made sure he’d have another story for you. Some of them made up on the spot, some taking inspiration from one of his friend’s dates, some of them real but without the same, genuine excitement you showed for your love life. A love life that didn’t include him.
Unconsciously, he made it a competition. Did you go on a date? He went on two. Did you kiss someone? He spent the night in another bed. All just so you could give him some type of reaction. Any indication that you were mad or uncomfortable about it. About him dating someone that isn't you. But every time you were supportive, feeling happy for him, and even encouraging him to call girls he didn’t even want to know more than just a one-night stand.
Calum only ever wanted for you to feel like he feels whenever he has to hear about the new guy that brought you flowers; the one that took you on a spontaneous trip to the Grand Canyon; or the one that cooked you a homemade meal for your first date. All the things that were killing him, he hoped you could feel at least a small amount of it. Waiting for you to realize it sooner rather than later.
“What?” You chuckled, nudging him with your elbow “The great Calum Hood never had his heart broken, he just breaks all the hearts along the way”
He laughed, pushing you slightly “Not all the hearts”
“Oh yeah, the other ones are Ashton’s job”
Calum just shook his head, quieting the voice in his head telling him that he didn’t break all the hearts because he was not going to break yours if given the chance to have it.
“Laugh all you want, you little gremlin,” He said
“Aww, Cal, I’m sorry” You pouted “I didn’t mean to upset you. I just really want you to be happy, you know? Find your person and all of that”
“I am happy, Y/N” He stated matter-of-factly “I have the band, the fans, Duke… I have you”
“I know, and I’m also so happy to have you” You smiled, lacing your fingers with his “But I’m talking about “the one”. You know, the one that makes your heart go crazy and the world spin around slower. The one that occupies your mind and every time you think about them you can’t help but smile. Someone that you can actually fall in love with. I’m not talking about marriage or things that we don’t believe in most of the time. But the one that makes the heartbreaks and disappointments all worth it because it led you to them”
Calum stared at you with an unreadable look in his eyes. How could you describe exactly what he was feeling but still have no idea that he has those feelings for you?
It has been a long time since he accepted you as being more than friends, or at least in his heart he knows you could be more. You were just perfect in every way, made just for him. And he loves you, he loves you so much without a hint of fear or doubt. But you just can’t see it.
“Maybe there is someone…” He mumbled, ready to spill his heart out to you on a silver platter.
But before you could register his words, your phone started ringing.
“Shit, wait a second,” You said, grabbing your phone from the table. Calum saw the small smile that formed on your lips before you declined the call “Sorry, what did you say?”
“Y/N, I-” He started again, and once again your phone interrupted him. He sighed “You should get that”
“What?” You asked, already silencing the phone again “No, it’s nothing, I promise”
“Who is it, though?”
“Oh, it’s just Matt”
“Matt?”
“Yeah, I told you about him, remember?” And he wished he didn’t.
You told him you were going on a date with someone called Matt a couple of weeks ago. He didn’t know you were still talking, let alone that you moved on to the “call” phase of the relationship. And now he couldn’t help but notice the gleam in your eyes when you said his name, a gleam that he knew would never be reserved for him.
“I forgot to tell him that he needn’t call me tonight” You sighed, already texting him. Calum could see the disappointment in your eyes.
“You should call him”
“What? No, Cal, I’m here for you and nothing is going to change that”
“I know, and thank you for that,” He said, faking his smile as much as he could “But I know you, and I know you want to call him so go ahead. I don’t mind”
You sighed “Thanks, babe. I’m just going to tell him tonight is off limits, it’ll take five minutes and then I’m all yours”
Oh and how it hurt him hearing you laugh from the kitchen as those five minutes went on. You sounded so happy and full of joy… he couldn’t take that from you now and, plus, would you even believe him?
Matt… what does he have that Calum doesn’t? Apparently, all the necessary to make you come back all giddy and blushing.
And when you sat up next to him and changed the topic back to Calum, his glass was already half empty.
*
“Hey, mate” Calum heard after the door slid open. Ashton soon stood next to him “Ready to go back in there?”
“Would Michael miss me if I don’t sing happy birthday to him?”
“You will break his heart” Ashton chuckled, trying to make him laugh as well but to no avail “You can’t avoid her forever, you know? She’s starting to notice”
“Well about fucking time” Calum spat, throwing the last of his cigarette to the floor.
Ashton sighed “Cal, c’mon… It’s not fair on her”
“It’s not fair to me either! What do you think, Ash? Do you think it’s funny for me to see her with him? To know every fucking detail of her happy life with Matt as if it didn’t kill me inside? It’s been years! Years where I have been so fucking close to telling her how I feel but there’s always him in the middle!”
He wasn’t crying, and he would not cry either. But he stopped hiding the rage he felt as his true feelings came spilling out of his mouth like a fountain of truth. He’d never said any of this out loud but now it seemed impossible to stop it.
“I’m just so fucking tired of seeing her with him. Seeing her kissing him, holding his hand, going on dates… All the things I should be doing with her”
“Cal…”
“No, fuck it! It’s true! It should be me! It always should’ve been me” His voice broke a little in the end “I should be the one in his place. I should’ve told her everything that night years ago, then I could be the one sitting on the couch with her, laughing and sharing those touches she thinks no one sees. But I do. All the fucking time those moments play on a loop inside my head and it’s making me want to scream. She’s the first girl I ever loved, the one that breaks my heart every single day because I keep letting her. She’s the one that’s making me feel like this without her knowing and it’s not fair! I could go in there right now and tell her how I feel but that won’t change a thing! She’ll still choose him! But I loved her first, Ash. I loved her first!”
Suddenly, all the air in his lungs was being crushed as Ashton brought him closer for a bone-wrenching hug.
For the first time that night, Calum relaxed. He let his body fall against Ashton’s frame as he hugged him back, hiding his face in his neck as the high of his confession wore off.
“I know it hurts,” Ashton said, lowly “But you can’t keep doing this to yourself, Cal”
“I know,” He sighed, pulling himself from the hug and patting Ashton’s arms “I don’t want to feel this way but I just can’t- I can’t let her go”
“Then try. You love her, do that for her”
“But what if-”
“If she feels the same and realizes that someday, then she’ll come to you. Don’t keep on waiting for an “if” Cal, you deserve more than that and so does Y/N”
Calum sighed and nodded, shaking his head a minute later from the overload of feelings. It wasn’t normal for him to snap like that, but it has been years since he kept it all in. It was bound to come out sooner or later, but he’d hope for a better outcome.
“Knock-knock!” Someone said behind them “Am I interrupting something?”
The two of them turn around to find you standing at the door, smiling at them as if nothing happened.
Immediately Calum started to panic, fearing that you’d heard everything. He said he hated your boyfriend, that he wishes he’d take his place, that he loved you… And you might’ve heard all of it while he was on a rant.
“H-hey, Y/N! Not at all, what’s up?” Ashton played the calm one, giving Calum time to freak out internally.
You were still smiling at them as you pointed back inside “We’re about to sing happy birthday, didn’t think you wanted to miss out”
You were acting so calm, with a big, kind smile on your face. Maybe you didn’t hear anything and just watched them hug awkwardly for a minute there. Calum could only hope. But then you smiled at him and nudged your head toward the party, and all he could do was breathe out and smile back, calming his nerves a little bit.
The three of you went back inside, quickly surrounding Michael as Luke brought out the cake and you all started to sing.
Calum looked back at you, standing next to Matt and leaning your head on his shoulder as your hands laced together. You looked briefly at your boyfriend and smiled, looking as happy as ever.
“Happy birthday dear Michael…”
And then it happened. For just one moment you looked back at Calum when he was already looking at you and his heart stopped.
You gave him a small, sad smile and shook your head no.
“Happy birthday to you!”
And all his hopes went away with the blow of the candles. * * tags: @iknowyouthinkimbulletproof @mystic-232 @talksoprettyjjx @theshyspy @hoodhoran @hoodharlow @littledrummeraussie @bubblegum183 @irwin-fletcher-ash @wiiildflowerrr @in-a-world-of-fandoms @another-lonely-heart @aabc5sauce @in-superbloom @sadcupofcoffee @personalmuyverypersonal @himbohood @sofiaaraee @irwindoll @weasleytwinscumslut @fairytrice @colourfulcal @nibin0912 @hfkait @savagejane1 @youneedtocalumdown @heyitskelseaj @ashtonsunflower @nicebasscalum @calumspupils @secretsicanthideanymore @alltimesos @wontlastimokwiththat @whywontyoulovemecami @theimpossiblehologramtree @perriexed @abiancajg @rewmuslupin @icelily13 @bookthingz @gracieboogirl @fastandtheformula1 @fckingpernico @multistann @averageantichrist @a-darneddarling @plaidshirtyears @ihavenoideawhattodowithyou @bittersweetb4by @aria-grace-scott @thestarsandtheircoffee @bvbygxrl @luisa180206 @xxxlaura @iamdayanaz @flyingburrito123 @drugerlime
262 notes · View notes
lovermine · 2 years
Text
promising forever, clifford
Tumblr media
desc: michael’s been sure she’s the love of his life for long enough, it was time for him to make the next big move when it came to promising forever
warnings for: a whole lot of tooth rotting fluff
Tumblr media
michael feels bad for those unlucky enough to have not befriended her, or those that had lost her company in the past. because to those who don’t know her had never felt her grace. the kindness she showed to the people she encountered. she helped when she could, whether it was random chores around a house that she doesn’t even live in, or a shoulder to cry on when you had nobody else. every minute michael had come to know her he had fallen more in love. with the emotions inside of her, the moments where he could laugh with her over a great day, or the days where he held her after life had dealt a shit hand. and he fell in love with every inch of her skin, explored under moonlight nights with soft touches and whispers of love.
to michael, she was the blood pumping through his veins, the strength in his bones when he had his own shit hand. when he was missing home on tour and she would fall asleep on call with him, send him videos throughout the day recounting what she was doing so just for a minute, it felt like he was there with her. when nothing was going right in the studio and her fingers danced across his skin in all the right places to help him decompress. and she was the constant by his side throughout the good too, when their new single hit number one and she had run into his office to congratulate him the minute they found out, when they had bought their first house together and insisted they christen every room in the house with large smiles and promises of forever.
it was those promises that had brought him to this moment, when the assurances of their always were as strong as ever. his fingers play with the small black box in the pocket of his jacket, foot tapping along to the music playing over the speaker as he awaits her to come home from her night out with friends. she had insisted on coming home early, despite him telling her that he didn’t mind spending the night alone if she wanted to truly let loose. but she had never felt more free unless she was with him, she said. and he knew tonight was the night.
he hears her keys jingling on the other side of the door from his spot in the living room, casting a quick glance to the area he had set up in the garden over the past few hours before making his way to the hallway where he could greet her as she came in,“mikey!” her smile widens as soon as she meets his eyes, dropping her keys onto the small table by the door she could wrap her arms around him.
“hey, sweetheart.” he mumbles into the material of her dress as he rests his head against her shoulder, the dark green fabric reminding him of the time she had worn it out when the band had been celebrating another success. he can smell her perfume as he holds her close, ignoring the small voice inside of him that tried to tell him it could be the last time. she loved him, he knew that. but the weight of the box in his pocket still sent his nerves sky-rocketing. “how was your night?”
“was fun, i missed you though.” he pulls back to admire her face, every feature having being studied extensively by him through their relationship, yet her beauty still managing to catch him off guard every time his eyes meet hers.
“i missed you too.” he mutters with a sigh, as if finally having her with him takes a load of weight of his shoulders. it definitely felt like it did, she had a special way of making him feel like all his problems melted away. he finally presses a kiss to her lips for the first time since she walked through the door, hand on her hip squeezing slightly before he pulls away to slot her hand into his. “i have something to show you.”
“oh god, what did you do?” she giggles as he leads her down the hallway,
“you’ll love it, hopefully.” her eyes widen in surprise when they step into the living room, gaze landing on the set up in the garden they can see through the sliding doors. there are candles set up everywhere, on the patio chairs, the floor, the tables and along the fence. they glow into the night and from afar, they almost look like resting fireflies.
“michael?” she questions as he leads her into the middle of all the candles, standing in front of her with a nervous smile on his face.
“i uh..” he cuts off whatever questions she was about to ask, rubbing his palms on his jeans. the nerves that he felt in the hallway seem to be slipping away as he starts thinking about what to say, knowing that whatever he said was coming straight from his heart, that his statement of profound love was the easiest thing he could ever think about because it was all he did. he’s convinced it’s his life purpose to love the woman in front of him. “i’m not sure a lifetime is long enough to truly show you how much i love you, you’re my inspiration, my motivation, and i want to spend the rest of my life with you because i can’t imagine a day without hearing your voice, or thinking about when i’m going to be able to hold you next.” he takes her hands in his, flicking his eyes between hers that are looking at him with the most sincere amount of admiration that he thinks he could ever recieve and the way her fingers are tracing over his tattoos on his hands, probably being able to sense his nerves. “i’ve found myself thinking a lot lately about what’s next for us, because everyday with you feels like another step in the right direction. i want us to have the life that we’ve spent countless sleepless nights talking about, having our own family one day and experiencing every new adventure life will bring us.” michael lets out a deep breath he had been holding as he moves to get down on one knee, her free hands now moving up towards her face that is contorted into a mix of recognition and surprise. a quiet giggle leaves her lips as she realises what is happening, heart beating so loudly in her chest that she’s scared it’s going to drown out his words. “i love you so much it gets overwhelming in the best way possible, and it’s the only thing i ever want to feel, so will you marry me?”
“there is no doubt in my mind that we are forever, michael.” she places her hands on his wrists to gesture him to stand up, “of course i’ll marry you!” her voice almost cracks with tears as he takes her in his arms, both of them laughing with the highest feeling of glee that they had ever felt before. every moment in their lives, the ones before they had even met, had been a rollercoaster edging it’s way to the top just before the long drop, and this moment was the feeling of exhilaration crashing down onto them.
“i love you so much.” michael mutters, taking her face in his hands so he can press kisses to every inch of her face.
“i love you, and our family.” she whispers into the night, inching her face closer to his as she kisses him once again. she watches as his eyes flash with confusion for a moment when they pull away, processing her words.
“our family?”
“i was gonna wait to tell you..set up a whole thing.” she laughs at the idea now, knowing that no moment would have been more perfect than now, when they had confessed their desire to be bound in marriage beside candlelight under the sky of their shared home. neither of them are fans of the large romantic gestures, or at least the ones in public, confessing their love for one another was something they preferred to be theirs alone. “but i found out yesterday, michael, i’m pregnant.”
“oh my god,” a smile takes over his face and even though she had never feared his reaction, it brings her a sense of relaxation now that he finally knows. there was no explicit trying for a baby, but they both knew that they had been getting sloppy when it came to protection and when neither of them questioned it, it was almost like a silent agreement that they were ready for that step. maybe it was the same feeling he felt when he was getting ready to propose, knowing that they were absolutely ready for the large commitments because they were ones they never dreamt of experiencing with anyone else. “we’re having a baby!”
“we’re starting a family, mikey.” her pointer finger caresses the stubble on his cheek as she holds his face between her palms, admiring the wide smile and all his features that she wishes their child would inherit.
“i love you, both of you, with absolutely everything i have.” michaels voice drops to a whisper as he mutters into the night, as if the words are meant for her and her only. because they are, for her and the unborn child. the woman in front of him filling his heart with so much love it was almost painful, but it was a pain he never wanted to go away.
“we love you too.”
Tumblr media
vai's thoughts: i absolutely love how this started but i kind of hate the ending, but michael is my baba and i need someone to be in love with me the way he’s in love with his girl in this fic. enjoy <3
© lovermine | all rights reserved. please do not repost any of my work as your own or share on other platforms thnx <3
link to taglist form <3 : @nimrats @arakuki
Tumblr media
106 notes · View notes
Another You
Tumblr media
.
Brad put his hand on her knee once more to stop her from the insistent habit. It was understandable how nervous she felt, but the longevity of her behaviour surprised the band. Yes, the song was one of the most personal they have written together, and yes, it was nerve wracking. But the ball of stress didn’t leave her chest since the first time they decided that it would be best to include her in the performance. It wasn’t even a big performance anyway, just a cosy party with fellow industry people and an acoustic little performance. It was a piece of cake, just to have fun.
Breath in, and then slowly out. She repeated to herself a couple of times, willing his non-existing lunch to go down. God, wasn’t she furious with herself, felt betrayed most of all. It was just a stupid performance, but she was still thinking about the person she wrote the song to. About how he would feel after hearing the lyrics, if he ever did obviously. Would he feel sad, like a blade was piercing through his heart, like how she felt every time she saw him with another? The tears starting to cloud her sight was the last thing she needed at the moment, so she looked up and tried to shoo the unpleasant thoughts away alongside the tears. Standing up and evening out the edges of her skirt she marched out of the room with confident steps. It was enough time she wasted on feeling sorry for everything. Now it was showtime. 
She walked over to the small table that held cocktails and fetched herself the brightest one with the umbrella, it was going to be a great night. The big room wasn’t much, a classic penthouse if you will, with a small area in the farther middle with some mic stands and enough space to fit a small-portioned band. Very cosy and cute if you asked her. Even though singing in front of everyone made her nauseated from the start, even though she had to agree that the feeling mostly went away, she got used to it with time. And the boys really helped, they have known each other for roughly three years. The first meeting happened again in one of the industry parties she attended with 5sos, luckily there was another boy band that consisted of goofy youngsters, if you may excuse her French.  It was safe to say they hit it off from the start, especially her and Brad. They never cut ties after that night, having exchanged numbers already.
Brad was a constant thing in her life. Even though it was hard to keep updated of each other’s life every day, they did a splendid job at never making it too long, whether it was just a simple ‘everything good?’ or just some stupid joke they thought was the funniest thing they heard. Everything became easy after that and suddenly Brad was her comfort person. There were some things she wouldn’t feel comfortable talking about if it wasn’t with him, and vice versa. Which brought them here, about to perform one of the most sentimental and heart-felt songs they have ever written, together or individually.
 Another you, was written after both of their monumental break ups, when she decided to stay in England for a few weeks to catch up and to mend her broken heart if she can. Then the song was born. It was a piano ballad, it was sad, but it was also hopeful in the way it promised them a start. It helped them get their head straight again, gave them a place to hold on to, a place to carry them forward. The alternative was to drown in their heartbreak and cry themselves to numbness with a bottle of wine, which really lost its appeal after a week of doing exactly that. So, one night, when they were basically having a battle on ‘who can talk more shit about the other’s ex’ they looked at each other and decided to stop feeling like that. They wasted enough time dwelling on them, but now was the time they understood the craziness of the situation. No one is irreplaceable. So, if it was not meant to be, there will always be someone else. (Or not obviously, she was all for being independent, but that is not the point now.)
Walking back to the boys with a new-found confidence in her steps was something she would be proud of later in the evening, alone. A soft smile placed itself on her face at the sight of her friends, warming their voices up while messing around. It was always astonishing to see bands that got on so well, their dynamics, their friendship and all the other bonuses. No one can deny the appeal of a band like One Direction but something about friends from the start really played with the strings of her heart. The lightning inside the room had a golden dim to it, just enough to give it the necessary luxurious vibe with the sincereness still intact. 
“Do you know when we’ll be on?” 
She asked, to no one in particular. “Probably in about half an hour.” Replied Tristan, while threading his fingers through his hair. Nice, she thought, enough to get mentally ready, but not enough to drive you mad. She gently sat on the small place next to Brad who was playing some specific chords and singing along. She joined him and reached out to the piano a little farther in front of her. Singing something she wrote always brought calmness and happiness to her, Making her feel extremely proud and causing her to disassociate from the real world. Her voice combined with Brad’s calm voice soothed her. Couple of other songs, some warm-up sessions later they started to move over to the little stage. Some with their instruments and the others with a couple of water bottles in hand. It was true that she was only going to be in one song, but the boys will be there for a small set of about four songs. She did a couple more of those breathing exercises to decrease her heartbeat. 
Brad was seated on the piano, next to him was her on a stool with a microphone in front of her. She arranged the mic stand to her height while others either checked their instruments one more time or took a sip of their water, she raised her head and caught Brad eying her with a giddy tinkle in his eyes. He raised a brow, asking if she was ready and smiled wildly when she replied with a small nod of her head. 
He cleared his throat and leaned into the mic that was attached to the piano in a charming, his hands sitting on top of his thighs. “Good evening, everyone.” He greeted everyone first. 
“I am Brad, and we are The Vamps, plus one. This is our dear friend Leighton. She is going to be singing our first song with us. The song is called Another You, Leighton and I wrote it a while back and felt like it was time we introduced it to the rest of you, the song is very dear to our hearts and…. Hope you enjoy it.”
He faced her one more time to assure, and then started the song after a countdown. The first line of the song burned a hole in her chest, the desperation in the first verse was just as touching every time she listened to Brad sing them. She was amazed by the way Brad put these together in mostly freestyle. They were so heartfelt that it felt wrong to share with the world, the exposure was real in this one.
“Am I to blame?
Is "leave me lonely" written on my face?
Did I try too hard to make you stay?
Guess I let my hopes get high again.”
She easily found herself closing her eyes and losing the feel of anything other than the lyrics. The possibility of Calum seeing this was high, but she didn’t care at the moment. She just wanted to express that she moved on too. That she didn’t care that much either, that it was time she got him out of her heart too. Because it was unfair, in her opinion, how he got to move on as fast as he did, leaving no choice for her but to suck it up and do the same. She was almost sure he was pretending but the knowledge didn’t make it hurt less unfortunately. 
“It took some time
For me to figure out that I'll be fine
Without you there to keep me warm at night
I guess you never were my ride-or-die”
She knew the part that would hurt the most was her dig to their tattoos, but she just simply couldn’t help herself. It felt like the heaviness behind them was something to get over. They were not a ride or die, maybe in the past, but not now. So, she wanted to make that clear, and hit it low. Feeling the tears pooling in her eyes once more while singing her verse, she forced her voice to get affected by the personal emotions. 
The song seemed to end too quickly once it started and she was almost startled back to reality with the sound of light claps. While a genuine smile appeared on her face she thanked them quietly and gave Brad a quick hug, wishing him good luck on the rest of their performance alongside the boys. She walked away slowly from the stage, trying to find a decent enough seat to sit. 
‘That went well’ she said to herself once seated comfortably, with a new bottle of water she fetched on the way. Her heartbeat slowly turned back to its normal pace since she was out of the spotlight now. And even if the word gets out and finds him, well then… It is what it is.
30 notes · View notes
ofthecaravel · 1 year
Text
i think it would be exceedingly funny if the sequel to You Don’t Go To Parties was called You Still Don’t Go To Parties
and then the third part would be You Continue To Not Go To Parties
12 notes · View notes
bartxnhood · 30 days
Text
talk fast | c.t.h
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
calum hood x fem!reader
summary: you both agreed to no strings attached, right?
warnings: oh boy tons of drinking (sorry), smoking, language, brief mentions of sexual activity (nothing explicit), and sexual innuendos.
w/c: 13k
a/n: hi my loves !! this one is a long time coming, i’ve been working on this since september. i started school in november which put a halt on all of my writing, but now that i graduated expect more from me. :). to all of my calum lovers, this one’s for you. p.s: if this does as well as i hope it does, i may consider making this a series on wattpad.
a/n pt.2: shout out everyone who helped my write this. esp @valentiyne you guys are amazing. 🩷
requests open
not proofread
Copyright © 2024 bartxnhood. All rights reserved. This original work is not allowed to be reposted on any platform in any format.
✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵
you weren't a stranger to relationships, and you'd had your fair share of them over the years. which you were aware that everyone else did, but you weren’t really serious about relationships. you didn't want to be with someone who didn't envision a future with you or who didn't share your goals.
your friends often told you that you should let loose and enjoy yourself, but that was not the life for you.
you had been in a very healthy relationship with someone you had known since college for the past few years. however, as time went, he became increasingly open about his needs for different things and eventually ended his relationship with you.
you went into a deep depression after the breakup, you didn't leave your apartment for weeks, you only showered maybe twice, and you couldn't remember the last time you ate anything other than instant noodles or ice cream.
what else could you do while you were wasting away? you had imagined spending the rest of your life with him, and now he’s gone.
your life seemed to change overnight.
while your friends and family around tried being there for you, you had pushed them so far away that they had just decided to give up on you. except, your best friend, olivia, finally dragged you out of your bed and forced you to shower so you could go out for the night with her.
“you need to get out, have fun, and forget about that jerk” she states, standing above you as she glides eyeliner on your eyes. “you’re hot, you’re fun, you have a great personality. i’m sure we can find you someone tonight!” she adds while finishing your makeup.
“olivia…” you sigh then look into the mirror, watching as your friend painted your face with a determined look in her eye. “no. we’re gonna have fun, we’re gonna party and get drunk. kay? you need this.” she grins, resting her head on your shoulder looking at you in the mirror. “now, go change into the outfit i brought you.”
"where are we going, anyway?" you ask, pulling at your skirt, which was riding up as you moved. you loved olivia, but some of her dress choices made you uncomfortable. "my brother got us into the pre-release party for the band five seconds of summer," she adds, gazing down at her phone for directions to the club, a hole in the wall on broadway. "what?!" you exclaim, your eyes widening. "how did he do that?" olivia laughs and clasps her arm around yours. "well, when you have a brother who manages a band, you kinda get vip treatment," she spoke with a grin. "plus, I told him how you've been feeling down, so he talked to the guys and they said it was fine," she chuckled softly, as the two of you continued your journey to the club.
the entry to the club was immediately visible due to the brilliant pink, purple, and red lights illuminating the street, as well as record posters in the windows. "this has to be it," olivia says as she opens the door for you, walking in after.
this was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, so you should be excited, right? but you couldn't shake the nagging guilt on the inside.
it’s okay to move on, right?
olivia leads you to the bar and orders a couple shots, "to your drop dead ex and a new beginning!" olivia cheers, toasting the glasses and the two of you downing the liquor.
you were about to start speaking when you were interrupted by olivia's brother, mark.
"it's been a long time, y/n!" he welcomes you with a shout. “how’s it going?” he asks, you see olivia roll her eyes and turn to her brother. “mark, we were having a conversation.” she states matter of a factly.
"i know, but I just wanted to introduce you to some of my buddies," the tall ginger says, stepping to the side and revealing four taller men. mark introduces them, "this is luke." he had blond curly hair, ocean blue eyes, and a white button-down shirt with the top button undone.
"michael," he said, his pink hair slicked to the side, a black snapback on, with a small wave of his hand in greeting. "ashton.” he had curly hair like luke, but it was fashioned in a 60’s greaser type of way, he smiled at you warmly, extending his hand for you to shake, the two of you nodding in acknowledgment of the other. "last- but not least, calum."
your gaze met his brown eyes, his chocolate curls resting just above his eyes as he looked you in the eyes. he was dressed in a white button-down shirt with black stripes that complemented his tanned and tattooed skin. he softly whispered "hi" as he squeezed his lips together in a smile. you smile back and nod. "hi.” calum's gaze lingers longer than he would have preferred, but he couldn't help himself. no way, not with you dressed like that. the way the black skirt clung to your hips and the dark blue halter top left nothing for the imagination
“guys this is my sister, olivia, and her friend, y/n.” mark says, pointing to the two of you, bringing calum out of his daydream. “nice to meet you guys” you say, offering a warm smile and they all nod to you. “are you staying for the show?” ashton inquired, olivia nods. “of course we are! wouldn’t miss it for a thing.” she gently nudges your arm, you laugh softly and nod.
"great, can't wait for you all to hear the album," ashton says, as the other three nod in agreement. "well, I have to get them backstage, but I'll see you later, okay?" mark replies, and you and olivia nod as the group disappears into the busy room.
as the show began, olivia tugged you closer to the stage, two rows back. the lights dimmed and you heard a huge cheer from the audience as the four boys you had just met took the stage.
your gaze was drawn to calum, who seemed engrossed with the music. how he made it appear so easy while looking so nice. you kept an eye on him for the majority of the night, but your mind was elsewhere.
you had found your way to the bar after the show had concluded; it was a terrific show, as expected, but seeing the band live was a weird experience, and you just couldn't enjoy yourself given your circumstances.
you found yourself reminiscing on your relationship during songs like "lie to me" and "why won't you love me," wondering whether you would have said something different or been more open to him. maybe you’d still be together.
you finish the drink you ordered and search the crowd for your best friend, but when you can't find her, you return your attention to the empty glass in front of you watching it being filled.
"was our stage set really that bad?" when you hear a voice, you quickly look up to find the person who is speaking. "i saw you, you seemed unhappy," calum adds, leaning on the bar. you shook your head and let out a breathless laugh. "no, it was actually very good," you say with a smile.
calum's gaze lingered, he leaned forward. "but? you were definitely not having a good time." you shrug and allow the bartender to refill your drink. "well, i got dumped not too long ago." "so", you trail off, messing with the glass in your hand.
"just not in the mood for a party, i guess," you shrug, and you hear calum hum. he switches his weight from one leg to the other. "actually, you looked pretty hot on stage," you cover your mouth and widen your eyes. "oh my goodness...i." you can't help but giggle, "i'm so sorry," you shake your head, and then gulp the last of the drink in the hopes that it will provide you with some liquid courage.
"you think I'm ‘pretty hot’?" he asks, his brow furrowed and his tongue protruding from the inside of his cheek. "no..i.." you sigh, removing some of your hair from your face. calum chuckles "no, no. you said it, you think I'm hot," he says in a teasing manner, crossing his arms with a quirked eyebrow.
calum would be lying if he said he didn’t think you were attractive as well. he had been eyeing you all night and figured, why not have some fun?
“what are you doing after this?” he asks, stepping a tad closer to you. now, he was just a few inches from your side and you caught wind of his cologne. you look down at the empty glass again, wondering what you’d say. you knew what he meant, and you had never done anything of the sort.
“well that depends” you answer, looking up from the glass and letting your eyes meet his. “well, i was kinda hoping you’d want to leave here with me” calum suggests with a smirk. you smile, figuring you could let lose for one night. “sounds great.”
it was just one night..right?
your eyelids flutter open, and you immediately feel a piercing pain in your temple. you groan silently and look about until you realize you're not in your bedroom when you peek over your shoulder, you notice a figure.
he was facing you, on his side. his curls were brushed back, his lips were slightly parted, and his arm was resting on your waist.
"oh, shit.." you think as you sit up against his headboard, drawing the loose sheet closer to your chest. your mind is filled with images from the previous night. meeting him, and then their brief talk in the bar. you rubbed your temples, still reeling from what you'd done.
you had slept with calum hood.
you had to get out of there because you couldn't believe what you'd done. you were never the type to do something like that. you attempted to remove the sheet so you could hurry up and put on your clothes from the night before and go home. however, while you were doing so, calum's arm gently tugged on your waist. "stay.."
when you looked at him, his eyes were still closed. you didn't move, feeling frozen as your gaze landed on the arm that framed your waist. you couldnt lie, calum was very attractive.
eventually, you finally managed to break free from his touch, and you threw on your clothing while searching for your phone and handbag. you discreetly opened and closed the door, making your way through the house to the front entrance.
you come to a halt as you pick up your shoes, pondering whether or not to leave your phone number for him. but you tell yourself that you'll never see him again, opening the door and walking out.
you order a lift home and finally check at your phone's alerts. olivia left almost twenty messages and made thirty phone calls. you tell her you're okay and on your way home.
you opened your front door to find olivia racing towards you. "where the hell were you?!" she exclaims, her eyes wide open. you hush her with a "shh," dropping your shoes beside the door. "i texted and called you!" "i know, i know," you remark as you pass by her to your room. "you can't just leave like that!" she exclaims as she follows you.
"olivia.." you sigh and stand in your bathroom, removing the last of your makeup from the night before. "i'm sorry okay, i was drunk and he was right there in front of me." "who?" she asks as she leans against the doorway. "calum.."
there was radio silence for a split second before you glanced to olivia, who erupted. "you slept with calum hood!?!" she exclaims, lunging for your arm. "calum hood?!? the one from five seconds of summer?" you closed your eyes, your head still throbbing, and her ranting only made matters worse. "okay, yes? i was drunk, and he came up to me for a moment...and the following thing led to another..."
"you slept with calum!!!" the ginger laughs as she claps her hands and softly jumps up and down. "oh my god!! my y/n is getting some!" you groan, throwing away the makeup wipe while moving past her. "oh, god. ew!" you exclaim as you enter your bedroom in quest of your pajamas. "tell me everything!" she says as she sits on your bed. "uh..no.." you say as you begin to change.
"just...leave it, im not going to see him again," you say as you brush your hair after changing. "what?! didn't you leave your phone number or something?" "no, olivia, it was just one night," you shake your head. i don't plan to see him again, okay?" you reinstate by placing the brush on the dresser. "ugh, you're no fun!"
"you should be happy about this, you're one step closer to moving on from your asshole ex-boyfriend!" exclaims olivia. you take a step out of your bedroom, looking over your shoulder at your ginger friend. you smile sadly, "i don't think I'll ever be able to get over him."
Tumblr media
"we are going to be late!" olivia yells as she tugs you out of bed. "i don't want to go," you protest, but the ginger pushes you into the bathroom. "get yourself ready and meet me outside, okay?" she smiles and goes away.
you sighed as you stood in front of your mirror and went about your business. wash your face, then apply skincare, makeup, hair, and finally your clothes. this consisted of a cropped white shirt, a black skirt, and boots. for the nightlife scene, this was your typical go-to.
you grab a leather jacket and your money on your way out the door to meet with olivia. “great, you're done!" she grins and grabs your arm. "and looking as hot as ever," you sigh, "i wear this every time we go out, olivia. this isn't anything new." you explain, and the two of you start walking up to the bar. "yes, but being single looks good on you... you look happier." she beams. you shrug and continue going, laughing as you say, "whatever you say."
you two arrived at the bar, which was already quite crowded with people you knew, and said your 'hi's and 'hello's' as you walked through the crowd to reach your normal friend group. this was a birthday party for one of your mutual friends; you were invited because you knew a few people there, but you didn't intend to stay long. after only a few drinks, you were dipping.
"hey, i'm going to get a drink, do you want anything?" you ask olivia, who was in the midst of a conversation. "um, no, i'm good for now," the redhead responds softly. you nod and turn around, headed for the bar.
you take a seat on a bar stool and order your usual, then pull out your phone and scroll for a few minutes as you wait for your drink.
"fancy seeing you here," you hear from behind you. when you turn around, a familiar face greets you.
calum hood.
you gaze at him for a time, blinking slowly, wondering why the hell he was at this party in the first place. how did he know your friend group?
"what? like what you see?" he laughs and walks up to the stool next to you. you discreetly giggle, rolling your eyes as you notice your drink in front of you. "you're full of yourself, calum," you say as you sip your drink. "well, you weren't thinking that when you were in my bed a few nights ago, were you?" he says, lifting his eyebrows as he speaks, attempting to elicit a reaction from you.
"oh god.." you mutter. calum follows you as you push yourself off the stool and onto the club floor. "come on, I was joking." when you hear his remarks, you shake your head and spin around to tell him off, but you freeze when you realize how close he is.
calum gazed back at you, his chocolate eyes piercing into yours. the way his wavy hair fell just above his eyes. you couldn't think straight when he was wearing a tight-fitting black t-shirt that emphasized his muscles- or how nice he looked in those black plaid pants.
calum hood was fine, and he knew it.
"you're a jerk," you reply, eventually jerking out of your daydream. as he steps closer, you can smell the tequila dripping from his breath. "oh yeah?" you say, nodding, "yeah." "well, you won't be saying that when you're in my bed again."
as you stare into his eyes, your grasp on your cup tightens. you couldn't take your eyes off him.
"fuck you."
he takes pleasure in your reply and leans in, his face right up against yours, whispering, "maybe later, sweets." then calum walks away, leaving you on the dance floor.
you find yourself back with olivia and your group of friends, scarfing down the drink knowing you needed to be intoxicated for the night ahead of you.
"i saw that," she says, as the two of you sway to the music. "what?" you inquire, attempting to appear clueless. "calum hood, hitting on you!!" she rolls her eyes. she giggles and pokes at your side. "no, it was nothing," you promise, moving her arm away. "whatever you say," she sings.
while you were on the dance floor with your friends, you were pretty intoxicated, and you knew he was watching you. you tried to ignore the sense of his eyes burning holes in the back of your skull. he observed your hips swaying to the music and the way your hair layed against your skin. It was driving him crazy.
flashes of you in his bed, your skin gleaming with sweat, the softness of your lips against his, or the touch of your nails on his back that sent thrills down his spine.
normally, he would never return to someone with whom he had a one-night encounter, but he couldn't get enough of you. he hasn't stopped thinking about you since that night.
you'd had enough of his glances and decided it was time to face him.
"stop" you say as you approach him. he blinks and asks, "what?." you sigh and roll your eyes. "i know you're staring, stop it." calum laughs and sets his drink on the bar. "i don't know what you're talking about, pretty." you sigh and rub your temples. "don't act innocent, i saw you." you say. he shrugs and leans forward. "oh, I'll show you innocent"
"calum, we can't do this," you say, looking him in the eyes. “It was only once." you say, as if attempting to persuade yourself. "oh, yeah?" you cross your arms and nod. "because it seems you don't believe that." calum retorts, his hand coming to rest on your hip.
as he moves in closer, you catch the scent of his cologne combined with the booze on his breath, which sends a shudder down your spine. you see flashes of his figure hanging over you from a few nights before. you couldn't possibly lie to yourself because you think about it every day.
"i know you want me.. i see the way you look at me," he continues. "come on, let's have some fun." his thumb was tracing circles on the fabric of your skirt.
you look into his eyes, your stomach flipping. you didn't want to give in, you didn't want to become someone you weren't. but that was calum fucking hood, and you couldn't resist him when he looked at you like that. "fuck it," you state.
Tumblr media
you gaze at the sleeping figure beside you, his breathing calm and steady. you couldn't help but feel bad, so you told yourself you wouldn't hook up with him again. you told yourself you'd never see him again. he was a celebrity, and you were just a city dweller who happened to get caught up with him.
you lie there for a moment, admiring calum. how could someone look so lovely while sleeping? you yank the covers off your legs and frantically dress to leave him yet again.
you collect your shoes at the exit, stand for a moment debating whether or not to leave your number, but you decide not to because this is the last time you'll see him…
right?
from that night forward, you felt like the universe was messing with you because calum appeared to be at every party, club, or bar you went to. he'd approach you as if nothing was going to happen, as if he was teasing you in some way- but it always happened.
those nights, you'd always end up in his bed, never yours.
you couldn't help yourself; no matter how hard you tried to pretend you despised him, you couldn't keep the mask up because you always caved and went home with him.
it became a habit; you'd go out with friends or by yourself, secretly hoping calum would appear in some way.
some nights, you weren't even there to drink, just to be there.
it was the same thing every time: you'd pretend to despise him because a small part of you wanted a serious relationship yet couldn't get enough of him. he made you feel alive. your ex never made you feel that way. the only person who ever made you feel *loved* was calum. you both knew it was only for fun, but it made you wonder if it might ever turn into anything more. you were always silently wishing you had left your phone number all those times, wondering if he would have called or texted you.
plus, you were aware that your friends, particularly olivia, were becoming suspicious. you had recovered quickly from your split following that first night with calum. she knew you’d leave with him at those gatherings but she didn’t stop it because you seemed to be doing better and you were a lot happier.
so far, calum was treating you right. at least, when the two of you were hooking up. so she never made any effort to stop what was happening.
for what felt like the hundredth time, you were back in his bed. instead of looking at him, you've turned your gaze to the ceiling. you know you should leave because it's about noon and you need to get home because you have plans with olivia later that day. you groan, running your hands over your face before getting out of bed and hunting for your clothing, all scattered along the floor.
"since you obviously don't want to stay," he spoke suddenly, causing you to pause in the middle of putting your shirt back on. calum raises up to rest on his elbows as your head spins around. "how about we just agree that this is a no-strings-attached situation," he suggested. you finish putting on your shirt and take your place at the foot of the bed. "calum.." you sigh,rubbing your eyes.
"y/n, just listen and consider it. we can keep doing what we're doing without making any commitments."
you stare at him, his hair was messy, he wasn't wearing a shirt, and you couldn't help but admire his physique. you lean down to grab your shorts, responding while you did so, "i'll think about it," before throwing on the rest of your clothes and leaving his bedroom. as you close the door behind you, you hear him sigh.
your hand was on the doorknob as you stood at the door, but you stopped yourself from opening it. you hated yourself as you reached into your bag for a pen and a random scrap of paper to jot down your phone number. you retrace your steps and leave it on his kitchen island. then you disappear from his home once again.
you unlock your apartment door and walk in, closing it behind you. you enter the kitchen, putting your bag on the counter and grabbing a water bottle.
"where have you been?" you jump out of your skin when you see olivia behind the refrigerator door. "what the hell, olivia!" you exclaim, nearly spilling the bottle. she's standing with her arms crossed with an intense stare. "did you hook up with him again?"
you move out of the kitchen and into your room, closing the fridge. "no, I don't know who you're talking about." you respond, but olivia isn't having it. "stop lying. you were with him last night and the nights before." "so?" you grumble.
"so?!", she exclaimed, you can't tell if she's really mad at you or just acting this way, she repeats. "you're having an fling with a celebrity! you have a habit of hooking up with him. surely something has to be there." she follows you to your room, standing in your doorway as she questions you.
"it's nothing, olivia. we just happen to be at the same location at the same time. okay?" you explain while looking for some clothes to change into.
"i call bullshit. you were never like this, until you met him." she continues, making you sigh. "it's just a distraction, okay?"
"I just...I don't know," you shrug, unable to express your feelings. "i'll meet you later, okay?" you turn away from her.
"actually…i have a date tonight," olivia confessed. "im sorry, but i'll have to cancel." she frowned. "that's fine," you say sympathetically over your shoulder. “have fun, and please text me when you get home, okay?" olivia nods, singing, "i will, love you hot stuff" she passes by you to leave your shared apartment.
you're sitting on your sofa with a container of leftover takeout from a few nights ago after freshening up. olivia had somehow gotten you hooked on a cringe-worthy television show.
you were already two seasons in and couldn't recall a single episode. calum had made your memory fuzzy. you couldn't get him off your mind. you remained curious about what he was doing when you left. did he think of you the way you thought of him? did he ever wonder what you did when he wasn't there? though you convinced yourself you were just being delusional.
…right?
calum glances at the scrap of paper on his kitchen counter, his fingers tapping near his phone, unsure whether to wait to message you. calum was well aware that what he was doing was probably not wise. because, after all, hooking up with you was just for fun, right? so why was it so difficult for him not to think about you? why were you so difficult for him to forget? it was just intended to be once, but now calum thinks about you whenever he gets the chance.
calum sighs, picks up his phone, and starts punching in your phone number. he has no idea what he's doing, but he doesn't stop himself from sending you a message.
- ‘hey, it’s calum’
you're standing in the kitchen right now, washing your hands, when your phone dings. your heart sunk as you looked over and said the message. you swiftly withdraw your hands from the sink, grab a towel, and dry them.
you take out your phone and read his message. You stare at it for a moment, unable to believe he actually messaged you.
-‘hey’
you respond as you stroll over to your sofa and sit on the cushions. you weren't anticipating anything from him because he'd practically established that the two of you were only in it for the fun of it and that was it. no strings attached. you don't hear from him again for the time being.
you're disappointed, but you return your focus to the television, hoping to forget about the singer on your mind.
you haven't heard from olivia in hours; she should've been home by now, but you guess she went to the guy's place she was seeing.
you get up from the sofa and grab your phone; all of your anxiety fades as you open your phone to calums' contact information and call him.
It rang several times before he answered. “hello?”
“hey, calum sorry if i’m bothering you”
“no, you’re good. what’s up?”
“i was just wondering if uh…if you’d want to hang out?”
"what do you have in mind?"
you laugh, "not like that"
you can hear him laugh in amusement, “sorry- yeah, sure. there’s actually this party tonight and i wasn’t going to go since i didn’t have anyone to go with. would you be down for that?”
you pause for a moment, picking at your fingers. “sure! that sounds great” you answer.
“nice, i’ll send you the address to ashton’s place and i’ll meet you there. see you tonight, sweets.”
you arrive at ashton's house, sitting in your car for a few minutes as you ran your options through your head. ‘was this a smart decision? were you planning to do this?’ you groan, taking your phone, and bag then exiting the car, heels clicking as you approached the entrance.
when you opened the door, you were greeted by the smell of alcohol and loud music. you stroll past the crowd near the entryway and start looking for the person you came here to see.
you notice him in the kitchen with his bandmates, he noticed you as well. with a tiny smile on his lips, he motions you over to the group.
"hey," you speak softly now that you're standing close to him. "hi," he greets, unconsciously placing his hand on the small of your back. "guys, i'm not sure if you remember, but this is y/n," he reminds before re-introducing you to the rest of the band.
"are you mark's sister's friend?" michael interjects, you nod. "yeah! i was the one in the blue top that night," you smile, everyone nods in acknowledgment. "well, i'm glad you could make it, if you need anything just let me know." "thank you," you nod nervously, then glance up to calum.
he offers to take you around and introduce you to some people to make you feel more at ease.
"i'm going to get something to drink, you want anything?" you make the offer to calum, who is seated on the sofa, he responds with a simple, "sure." you nod, heading to the kitchen by yourself, leaving calum with his buddies.
"how long have you two been together?" someone seated next to calum asked, he turns to see it was ashton's girlfriend. "oh, no- we aren't together." he responds, but her reply is unexpected. "are you serious?" she asks, calum nods. "no way," she whispered, astonished as she takes a sip from the crimson solo cup. "what?" calum questions.
"there's no way you two aren't together," she says again, "the way you look at her. i'm not sure what the two of you are up to, but you should figure it out," she concludes, chuckling. calum simply stares at her, her attention drawing elsewhere.
he thought about what she said the entire time you were gone. did he actually act that way? did he treat you as though you were his girlfriend? did he look at you in a way that suggested you two were dating? no… you two were just hooking up. nothing else.
he had no idea you were back until you spoke up. "here.." you offer, handing him the drink. calum looks up takes the drink you offered, "thank you sweetheart" "anytime, sugar" you chuckle and go for a seat, but all of them are taken… okay, so you would just stand up for the time being. when calum notices this, he reaches for your waist and pulls you down onto his lap. you look down at him, confused, “what are you doing?” he looks up at you with those eyes.
those big brown eyes that made you feel as if you were on cloud nine. calum looked at you like you were the only girl in the universe.
at least, that’s what you told yourself.
“i’m not just gonna let you stand there.” he answered with a cheeky smile.
people started to leave after a few hours. you were still sitting on calum's lap as everyone else congregated in the living room, talking about whatever and playing drinking games.
you get up from the calum's lap, leaving your drink behind to walk to the restroom down the hall. you approach and knock, hearing someone in there. you stand a few steps away from the door and pull out your phone to pass the time.
after a few minutes, calum finds you. leaning his arms against the wall, effectively caging you between his arms as he stands in front of you. "whatcha doing?" he demands, boxing you in and staring at you. "I'm waiting for the bathroom," you say, glancing up at him.
"you know..." calum pauses, coming in closer. "my house isn't too far from here, and i have a bathroom..so..you can just use it there," you sneer at his offer, "how convenient.." you respond, just above a whisper.
you push yourself off the wall and past calum, leaving him speechless. "where are you going?" he asks, his arms at his sides. "your place. you coming or not?" you grin as you peer over your shoulder.
calum chuckles quietly as he approaches you and wraps his arm around your waist. he was nearly dragging you to the door. "sorry guys, we have to run!" he grabs your bag, carrying it for you before dashing out the door with you.
the others could only chuckle to themselves and smile knowingly as the two of you dashed away.
you're back in his bed, and you know it before you open your eyes. the smell of his bedsheets let you know you were back. the warm vanilla smell invaded your nostrils as you stretched and opened your eyes to find yourself staring at a familiar ceiling. you check over your shoulder for calum's sleeping figure, but he's not there.
you carefully sit up, bringing the sheet along to cover your chest and rubbing your eyes with your other hand. only then do you spew calum standing at the doorway wearing only basketball shorts. "good morning, princess," he says, and you groan, feeling a headache coming on. "i'm making breakfast if you want to stay," he says before walking out the door. you sigh as you get out of his bed and seek for your clothes before leaving his room for the kitchen.
you notice pancakes and fruit on a plate waiting for you. as he stands and consumes his food, you take a seat at the kitchen island. It's quiet for a few minutes before he speaks up.
"so i was thinking.." calum begins. you raise your head to look at him. "i know we said no strings attached but what if we expand the deal?" you lift your brows, confused as to what he was on about. "what do you mean?" you inquire. "at parties, we could be each other's automatic plus one. that way, we won't have to worry about who we go home with." you look up at him, then down at your plate, shifting some of the food about.
"i don't know, calum." you let out a sigh. you want to say yes, and you want to be around him at all times- but you just can’t confess it. "i'm just tired of being ditched by the guys at events, and i wouldn't mind if you were the one to fill that spot," you gaze up, your eyes meeting his. "okay...i'm down," you nod, and calum smiles. "great."
you continue eating as silence fills the room, you don’t really know how to keep a conversation with him since you two only hung out at parties. “when’s your birthday?” he asks. you chuckle, “what happened to no strings attached?” you ask, taking a drink of your water. “well, we can be friends with benefits. friends can know things about each other” he rebuttals. you look at him, finally caving. “y/bd” you answer, calum nods. “that’s coming up” you shrug, “its a couple months. what about you?”
“january 25th” he answers. “happy belated birthday” you reply and he laughs. “so you do have a heart.” you rolls your eyes, “oh whatever.” you can’t help but crack a smile.
calum admires you, how you still manage to look beautiful even in the makeup from the night prior and your hair is a mess. calum wants to be your friend, he wants to know stuff about you other than how you are in bed. he looks down at his plate, knowing he shouldn’t be thinking of you as anything for than his fuck buddy.
“what’s something you’ve always wanted to do?”
you think for a moment, your free hand is now supporting the weight of your chin. “hmm..i’ve always wanted like a big birthday bash.” you answer, “but i just never had the opportunity or people to go with” you add. he nodded, making a mental note.
———
calum proceeds to ask you out every other night, claiming that he doesn't want to be alone. of course, you went, but it simply muddled your sentiments for him. because he made it apparent that you were just friends.
so what was it about him holding your hand at parties that got you so worked up? or when he'd hold your back as you walked through a crowd of people. you'd have to convince yourself to stop staring at him for so long before anyone noticed.
you opted to see someone else on the side in the hopes of sorting out your feelings because the only reason you had feelings for calum was because he was the only person you had been seeing this much, right? furthermore, calum had made it obvious that there were no strings attached.
"hello?" you answer the phone as you go inside your apartment after getting home from work. "hey! "I'm sorry if i'm bothering you," calum says over the phone. "no, i just got home from work. you're fine!”
“how are you?" you ask, placing your keys on the table.
"i was just wondering if you're free tonight?" he inquires. you sigh and open your refrigerator to see if you have any snacks. "um, actually i was going out with a friend tonight…" you speak, and on the other end you hear him sigh, "okay! if your plans fall through, let me know." you smile to yourself, "of course," and it gets silent for a bit as the two of you are at a loss for words, "well, i'll let you get ready then..." "alright...bye..." you say as you pull the phone away from your ear and finish the call.
calum sighs as he tosses his phone to the opposite end of the sofa and rests his head back. he knows that he should not be disappointed; you have your own life, and calum was only a little part of it, just as he had his own life but knowing he wouldn't be able to see you tonight hurt. so, instead of moping about, he decided to ask his bandmates if they wanted to hang out for the night.
however, the night was uneventful; luke had met a girl, michael was conversing with someone, and calum was left alone with ashton.
"isn't that the girl you're seeing?" ashton says unexpectedly, motioning towards you at the bar. calum looks over his shoulder and sees you talking with a guy.
calum is hurt, but he turns around and shrugs as he faces ashton. "we're not seeing each other, i don't like her like that," ashton chuckles as he sips his drink, "sure you don't," calum moans, "mate, cmon.."
“you’re lying to yourself, mate. maybe you don't say you like her, but your eyes say everything." ashton spoke, calum knew it was true. he did like you, but he was unsure if you even considered him more than someone just to hook up with. you had been giving him mixed signals, because one night you were all about him but the next day you wanted nothing to do with him.
calum peers over his shoulder once more, this time observing that the guy that was now touching you, his hand on your leg, inching higher and higher. calum considers ashton's words and walks away from the table he was at towards you.
the way he felt was enough confirmation for his feelings for you. he wanted to be more than just a friend you sleep with. he wants to the be the person you come to during your darkest times, he wants to know your favorite songs, he wants to know your favorite movies, food, candy, animal, he wants to be your person.
“so when were you going to introduce me to your friend?” your head whips around to find calum standing behind the bar stool you sat at. “calum?” you blink before turning back to your date who had now removed his hand from your thigh. “you know him?” the man questions, eyeing calum.
“uh…he’s just my-“ calum cuts you off, “boyfriend” he finishes for you. your eyes go wide looking at calum again, you were about to open your mouth but calum beat you to it. “and we should be heading back now” he reaches for your waist, grabbing your purse and escorting you out of the bar.
"what the hell!?" you yell outside the bar, shoving him away from you. "you can't do that, calum! we're not exclusive, we are not dating; we're just friends who occasionally hook up" you hear calum chuckle and it sends you over the edge.
you huff and begin to walk away, but calum follows you and drapes his arm over your shoulder.
"youre mine and i don't share"
"where are you taking me?" calum walks next to you, instinctively leading you to his car. "home," he says, unlocking his car door and allowing you to enter before closing it and walking to the driver's side.
within a few minutes, you realize he's heading in the opposite way. "calum this isn't the way to to my place" you're saying. "I know," he replies, looking over at you. "i never said which home"
‘get ready, im coming over’
calum takes out his phone. he thinks nothing of the message you just sent him, presuming you're coming over to visit him. however, when you came and kept honking the car horn for him to come outside he was a bit thrown off.
when calum walks outside, he puts his phone and wallet in his pocket while walking over to your car. as you roll down your window, he leans in. "get in, we're going shopping," you say, music still playing and a smile on your face.
"why exactly do you need me for this?" calum inquires, his brow furrowed. you reply, "well considering you'll be the one taking it off i figured you might want to help me pick out something" while grinning. despite his flushed cheeks, calum takes a step back, unlocks the car door, and hops inside.
you took calum to the mall and modeled for nearly two hours while looking for the right outfit for your birthday. it had been two hours of no success until one of the last stores you visited had this leather skirt you had been eyeing for a while.
calum couldn't take his eyes off of your body when you emerged from the dressing room. both the halter top you chose and the skirt perfectly complemented one other. you drawled, "sooo?" hoping for a positive response. he answers right away, "yes." when you looked down at yourself, he speaks up again. “that’s the one, you have to get it.” and you couldn't help but laugh. you nod and examine yourself in the mirror before returning to the dressing room to change into your clothing so you could check out.
you happen to pass a leather jacket on your way to the register. and it just so happens to go well with the skirt. additionally, you observe that calum is examining it longer than anything else you have so added in the store. you made the choice to pick it up, do your best to estimate his size, and continue moving forward to pay.
on the way back to your place you pick up takeout since it was getting late in the evening and you both were starving.
when the two of your arrive home, you get comfortable on the sofa and begin picking out a movie while calum is in the kitchen sorting out the food before bringing it all into the living room. you picked out a movie and the two of you eat in peace, enjoying each others company.
afterwards, you had started cleaning up all the empty containers and throwing it away with the help of calum.
“will you put the skirt on again? i forgot what it looks like” calums asks and you laughed, looking over your shoulder. “seriously?” he nods. you pause for a moment before rolling your eyes and sigh, “fine.”
you walk out of your bedroom in the skirt but you hid something behind your back, looking a bit shy. which was unusual because you never acted like this around calum, so he knew something was up. “y/n, what’s behind your back?” he asks in a teasing tone and you begin walking towards him slowly. “okay, so, don’t be mad but i may have picked you up something too..”
she grins bringing the jacket from behind her and handing it towards him.
“i—y/n/n please tell me you didn’t buy this leather jacket for me” you take a few steps forward. “i’ve never heard you say please before. this is new.” you say, smirking. calums rolls his eyes but he can’t help but smile and you continue, “but yes i did. i saw you eyeing it so i grabbed it”
he tries to hide his smile. “well go on, put it on” you help him into the jacket and it’s then when he notices. “did you get this so we could match?” he says laughing. “no i absolutely did not! i just wanted to do something nice for you” he quickly responds “you didn’t have to go through the trouble of getting more clothes sweetheart. taking some off would’ve had the same effect” he chuckles. you playfully hit his chest and say “you’re insufferable.” you look away but then looks back smiling.
“but yeah maybe i wanted us to match a little bit. sue me” he grabs your waist and pulls your closer, you feel his thumb drawing circles on your exposed skin and it sends shivers down your spine. “well i certainly appreciate the thought, sweets. now we just need an occasion to show up everyone” calum teases, leaning in. his lips only inches from yours, you feel your cheeks warm up. “calum..” you warn but he continues to close the space between the two of you. “it’s just one kiss..”
you hate your birthday, it was the one day of the year you always found yourself to be the most miserable despite having people who loved you around. you still felt so unhappy.
“y/n, are you ready? you can’t be late to your own party!” olivia calls out from the living room. you exit your bedroom, meeting her in the room. “i’m ready, im ready” you say, throwing your bag on your shoulder. “y/n..” you hear olivia sigh, she takes a few steps towards you and puts her hands on your shoulder.
“lighten up. i know you hate your birthday but this year im not
letting you be miserable. kay?” she gently shakes you enough for you to crack a smile and nod, “good” she says, linking her arm with yours.
“now let’s go before people think you bailed your own birthday party.”
the two of you arrive to the same club where you had first met calum yet this time, the atmosphere was different.
no purple, pink, or red lights. no promotional posters in the windows. instead, you see white paper decorations and warm fairy lights.
you enter the bar in front of olivia and hear a loud uproar of people cheering as you did and some people even popping confetti. you couldn’t help but laugh as you walked through the crowd, seeing all of your close friends standing around celebrating you.
olivia was also giddy, knowing she had planned this whole thing along with calum.
“you guys didn’t have to do this!” you said over the music after you saw the cake sitting in the middle of the room, you’re beaming with joy. for the first time in a long time you were excited to be celebrating your birthday.
you spent time greeting people and thanking them.
some of these people you haven’t seen in years and it made you feel like things were finally getting better.
just as you were about to catch up with some old friends, the lights dimmed and you heard some light strumming from the nearby stage.
you look over seeing four familiar figures underneath the red stage lights.
“hello everyone,” luke begins, adjusting the mic. “if you all don’t know, we are five seconds of summer” the crowd roars at the name drop and some people are playfully hitting your shoulder not knowing your tied with the band.
“we just wanted to say we are truly honored to be back at the place we showcased our recent album, and of course to celebrate the birthday girls special day.” .
“so, happy birthday, y/n. we hope you have a wonderful year.” luke beamed.
the set was at least forty-five minutes long, they had played mostly their new stuff off the youngblood album but dropped in a few older songs.
you were over the moon.
to say you had five seconds of summer perform at your birthday party? that’s huge.
you never thought you’d end up in this position.
to say you had personal connections to people as big as calum, or even the whole band for that matter.
tonight was a night you’d definitely never forget.
standing outside the club, you watch the people inside dance and get lost in each other. the whole scene was almost melancholy- the way everyone was there to celebrate you. the night was near ending and you felt so cramped in there, you thought you'd spend the last few hours of your birthday catching your breath.
"hey you" calum voice interrupts your thoughts, a cigarette between his fingers as he watches you from a close enough distance. you furrow your brows, "didn't know you smoked"
he quickly flicks it to the floor, stepping on it a few times before picking up the trash.
"Is it a turn off?"
"no no i just didn't know" you shrug and look back up at the sky, "i don't think i know anything about you aside from you're good in bed and you like whiskey" he chuckles now, stepping closer to you and placing his hands on your waist.
"well, ask me anything you want"
you watch as he looks away for a moment, searching for the perfect question.
"if you could go anywhere in the world, where would you go?"
your eyes don't leave the sky as you think, long and hard about the question. "i’d love to see paris... it's been my dream since i was a child."
you could feel his hands loosen from your waist, he steps infront of you and stared down at your face with a smile. It's almost like he's thinking of what to do or what to say next.
“paris?” he repeats.
you nod, tilting your head to the side, studying him. "what about you?"
calum had now completely removed his arm from your waist as he leans down to rest his elbows on the metal railing.
“considering i’ve toured around the world, ive been to plenty of amazing places” he says, looking back to see if you were looking at him.
“i don’t have just one, too many places, not enough time to explore” he answered.
you nod, looking away towards the city. the nightlife in downtown los angeles was a lot lively than normal.
probably because your birthday fell on a friday this year, so all of the bars were jam packed and faint music flooded the streets.
you inhale, about to say something as your turn your attention back towards the brunette.
“y/n! cmon!” olivia grabs your wrist pulling you inside and away from calum, towards the large cake so you could blow out the candles.
“come on birthday girl, make a wish!” olivia cheers along with everyone standing around. you laugh, “okay okay!”. you blow out the candles and everyone begins to cheer. olivia hugs your side and giggles, “what did you wish for?” she asks. you grin petting her head, “if i tell you it won’t come true, will it?” your eyes flicker between calum and olivia as you speak.
you hear olivia groan in annoyance. someone amongst the crowd, you guess ashton, you could recognize that arm anywhere, points to the cake and says, "birthday girl gets first pick!"
you finally see his figure merge from behind someone with a plastic plate and knife. "what piece does my girl want?" ashton continues.
you examine the cake once more and point to a corner piece smothered in the purple icing with a kiddish like grin on your face. ashton's nods and begins to cut you a piece.
as it nears the end of the night and the bar slowly begins to empty out, you've found yourself at the bar watching everyone says their goodbye and share a hug with you before leaving the building.
the music was faintly playing now, compared to when you had arrived eariler.
solo cups trashed the floor, paper plates and napkins scattered the bar table. you look down at the glass setting in front of you as you swirl around the liquid contents. you didn’t even notice calum approaching.
“how was your birthday?” he hums, sitting next to you.
“good” you smile, resting your head on your hand. “tonight was good. you did great on stage.”
“yeah?” calum raises his eyebrows, you see a playful smirk forming on his lips. “mhm, very rockstar.”
calum laughs at your comment and then the two of you fall silent, watching as some people begin cleaning up the mess.
“can i talk to you?” calum questions, turning his focus back to you.
you nod, “yeah, of course”
“in private.” he adds.
you raise your eyebrows , wondering what he needs to say that he can’t in front of your friends.
“sure”
calum takes your hand and leads you towards the back door, which you had no idea was back here.
when he opens it, you see a patio with a string of fairy lights surrounding the area.
“you’re going to think i was stalking you or something, but this just happened by chance. i swear.” calum stands you in front of him as he reaches in his back pocket and hands you a plane ticket.
“we’ll be in paris on the first leg of our tour and i had an extra ticket.” he stated. you look up at him wide eyed, then do a double take to make sure you were seeing it right. “calum..what? i…i just i can’t just-“
“i want you there.” he adds.
“i want you in paris with me, hell- i want you on the whole tour with me. please, take it” he offers it to you again, making you take it.
“oh my god” you mutter, looking down at the ticket now in your hand.
“the flight is in two days, i know it’s hella last minute but i figured its now or never” calum speaks softly.
you’re still at a loss for words, your body working faster than your mind as your wrap your arms around calums figure. “thank you so much” you say into his shoulder.
“anytime” he hums, hugging you back.
“cmon cal! we gotta head back.” michael can be heard from the bar.
the australian pulls away and offers a warm smile, “see you in paris..” he says and walks off. “bye..”
you’re quick to whip your phone out and text olivia before heading back to your apartment partment
“youll never believe what just happened”
“is this a good or bad thing”
“uhh good? i think? i hope so”
“well dont leave me in the dark what happened”
“calum gave me a ticket to paris” “WHAT, Y/N THATS HUGE. are you gonna go”
“i mean, id feel bad if i didnt. i hate how easy it is for me to like him.”
“we’re so having a debriefing when you get home.”
Tumblr media
the plane ride was long and tiresome, eleven hours of being so uncomfortable in the seats and having someone next to you who had no regard for personal space. plus, you just hated planes in general.
but once the plane landed, you felt a wave of relief and soon enough you were off the plane and navigating your way through the foreign airport.
once you get to baggage claim you wait for your luggage and once you have it, you begin looking around for a familiar person.
you round a corner and finally see the one you had been searching for. “there’s my pretty girl” calum says, as his eyes lands on you as he makes his way towards you.
“i look awful calum” you laugh as his arms wrap around you tightly. “no such thing” he says into your hair before pulling away. “how was the flight?” he adds, taking your luggage from your hand then linking his free hand with yours while leading you out of the airport.
“long” you laugh tiredly, as you watch him load your bags into the back of the car.
the uber back to the hotel that calum was staying at was nice, being able to see nice scenery before you’d sleep for the next twelve hours.
the plan was, you’d sleep for as long as you could until calums show tomorrow, then hopefully, you’d be well rested and enjoy his concert and have a few days in the city to spend with him.
still only as friends..right?
while you start unpacking, calum was helping. “when are you going to sleep?” he asks, taking your now empty suitcase and putting it next to his as you were folding and putting the clothes in the dresser. “probably when i get done here.” you say closing the drawer to the dresser.
“no, you’re not” calum says, causing you to stop and turn to him. “what?” you blurt, harsher than you wanted. “what do you mean ‘no’”.
“i mean no because i’m taking you out tonight.” “calum” you try to interject but he doesn’t let you. “were going out tonight, no ands, ifs,or buts. kay?” he says, walking towards you. “and be sure to wear that skirt, you look good in it.” he whispers into your ear.
“what skirt?” you ask, trying to act oblivious.
calum scoffs a little, “you know the one.”
you finish swiping the last bit of mascara onto your lashes and close the tube, then check yourself in the mirror once more wanting to make sure you outfit was good enough.
“you done?” you hear calum voice ring the hotel room into the bathroom. “yeah!” you yell back and grab your lipstick, touching up your lips before throwing it and a gloss in your bag and exit the bathroom .
“you look great” calum grins, walking towards you. his arm snaking around your waist and pulling you closer. you grin, taking notice just how good he looks in leather jacket. “so do you, mr.rockstar.” “yeah?” he smiles, you nod. “yeah. you ready?” you ask. “yep let me get my wallet”
the night was nearing an end, you walked down the street next to calum, luke and sierra followed behind the two of you. calum had taken you all over the city, to nice cafes, his favorite spots from the last time he visited, and a museum. it was truly a wonderful day in the city of love.
the four of your turn a corner and suddenly you’re shocked by the bright dazzling lights of the eiffel tower.
you’re starstruck, you must’ve stopped in your tracks became calum looks back at you, “you comin’?” he grins, holding out his hand for you to take.
you felt like a kid in a candy store as you approached the structure. it felt like something out of a dream. you weren’t sure why you loved the idea of being in paris, but you were here now. standing in front of the famous landmark in the world, it was so beautiful you could cry.
“wow..” you speak breathlessly. the twinkling lights reflected in your eyes, the way it stood out against the dark sky, it felt like the most magical thing you had ever seen.
you’re quick to take your phone out and snap a couple pictures, not wanting to forget this moment. it would be something you would talk about forever.
“hey y/n-“ sierra taps your shoulder. your spin around and face the girl, “mm?”
“care to take a pic of me and luke?”
“sure!” you take the phone from sierra as the couple poses in front of the sight. “i’ll take a couple so pose however you want” you smile and begin snapping pictures of the two.
luke and sierra were a good couple, they complimented each other very well. and from what you’ve seen of sierra she was a good friend and good girlfriend to luke.
“check those, make sure you like them” you hand the phone back to sierra so she can check them.
“perfect! thank you so much!” sierra beams looking at the photos then up at you.
“do you want some with calum?” she asks.
you look over at calum who was already looking at you. “um, sure!” you hand your phone to sierra.
you and calum stand next to each other and let sierra snap a couple pictures together. luke is standing behind sierra watching as she makes sure to get all the angles.
“beautiful!” she exclaims with a wide grin as she hands your phone back to you so you could check the pictures.
you swipe through the pictures awhile calum looks over your shoulder.
“god damn” the australian begins, “we look good together.”
and it was true. you did look good together. maybe you could picture being with him more than his ‘friend’.
Tumblr media
your eyes flutter open to the soft rays of the sun peeking in through the sheer white curtains of the hotel room. “morning, pretty” you hear calum say causing you to look over your shoulder where he sat on the opposite side of the bed.
you groan quietly, rubbing your eyes as you slowly sit up to lean against the headboard. “mornin” you reply followed by a yawn. “what time is it?” “noon” calum answers, turning off his phone. “damn” you reply knowing you’ve slept almost a whole day. “sorry” you say but calum shakes his head, “don’t apologize, you needed the rest. plus, you’ll be well rested for tonight” he grins, you shake your head and playfully push his shoulder.
“what’s on the agenda for today?” you yawn again, and calum leans back on the headboard. “well, we have to be at the venue at two and soundcheck is at three”. he says, checking his phone for the time.
“good, gives me plenty of time to get ready” you say, reaching for your phone. “do you want to leave with me or do you wanna just come whenever you’re done?” you shrug thinking about how long it’ll take you to get ready. “i might just uber after i’m done that way i don’t have to rush.” you start, ripping the cover off of your legs. “plus it’ll give me enough time to make sure i look good for you tonight.” you say with a grin before getting out of the bed and making your way to the bathroom.
calum laughs before calling out to you “you’re a tease, you know that?” you smile to yourself using water for your shower. “always!” you holler back.
Tumblr media
you’re sat in the back of an uber staring out the back passenger window. the venue isn’t very far from the hotel so the ride wasn’t too bad. when you arrived you saw the line of fans outside all waiting in queue you smiled to yourself, feeling proud of the band, and calum.
you step out of the vehicle and walked around like a lost puppy trying to look for olivia’s brother, mark.
you take the time to see everyone waiting in line dressed in their best and looking beautiful.
“oh thank god” you start, spotting the blonde man. “y/n! you made it!” mark smiles, pulling you in for a hug.
“yeah, thank god, i almost got lost.” mark nods and begins leading you down a long corridor until reaching the dressing rooms. “i figured you’re here for calum?” you look up, staring at him for a moment before blinking. “that obvious huh?” mark laughs, then hands you a vip laminated lanyard. “keep this on you, have fun and enjoy the show.” he adds as he pats your shoulder.
you watch as he walks away, taking a deep breath as you open the door peeking your head in. you see the guys spread out in the room until calum looks up from his phone to greet you.
“its about time you got here, i was about to worry.” he says, now pulling you into their dressing room. his tan arms wrap around your figure and you get a whiff of his cologne.
he keeps you close to your side as the other guys come up to greet you. “was it hard to find?” calum inquires, you shrug, “i walked around the building until i eventually found mark and now im here” you laugh. “probably a little late, traffic was crazy”
calum smiles, “all good, at least you’re here now. that’s all that matters.” he says, slinging his arm over your shoulders.
“all right guys, they’re all ready for you” some stage manager, you had to guess, said as they popped their head in the door.
you separate from calum as he fixed his in-ear-piece and grabs his bass. you smile at him and give him a thumbs up and watch as he followed behind the other three.
“are you sierra and y/n?” and woman enters the room, her dirty blonde hair was cut to about her shoulders but it was obviously growing out. she had a welcoming smile and comforting aura. the two of you nod. “perfect, i’m hannah i can take you guys to your seats!” she beams and then the two of you follow her out into the arena where she showed where the two of you would be at.
side of the pit, calums side, so it was actually perfect for you. “are you guys going to be on the rest of the tour?”
“i will” sierra smiles. then hannah turns towards you.
“oh, i don’t know yet” you laugh, taking a swig of your drink.
“well, i’ll be on the tour with the guys so if you every need anything just look for me.” she smiles again. “enjoy the show!”
it was incredible to see, they were truly in their element. each of the acting as if they were born to be on stage.
“wow!” michael hollers about midway through their performance, taking a small break in between songs. luke is still strumming quietly in the background. “paris, how the fuck are we feeling?!” the crowd erupts in loud cheers.
“it’s great to be back after so long” he continues, then takes a glance at his band mates. “how are you all liking paris?”
“good, i love it here” luke answers, earning a few hollers from the crowd.
“how you liking paris, cal?”
“what about the view here? it’s such a beautiful place” luke interjects.
“you seen anything nice lately, calum?” luke continues
“yup, the views in my hotel room are amazing.”
your heart stopped, it was subtle. just enough for only you to notice. he was definitely mentioning you.
“do you mean from?” luke chimes.
you can faintly see calum smile as he laughs into the mic, “yup, my bad.”
“alrighty then.” michael pauses, luke had taken a few steps back from the mic but could still be been laughing.
“then how about you introduce the next song?”
“the next song is for all those who end up meeting someone and know it won’t be more than just having fun. and they’re okay with that. talk fast.”
you wondered what it looked like from their perspective. you turn to face the crowd and you’re overwhelmed with what you see. people screaming their lungs out to the lyrics, some dancing with their friends, you even see some people crying. you also see some signs. some more creative than others, and some sweeter than others.
you manage to spot one that made you a little uncomfortable; “call me red with the way i be riding hood”
sure, clever, but it made you realize that if you had a shot with calum, what’s stopping him from hooking up with any other fan when you’re not around?
shit.
maybe you did like him more than just a fuck buddy.
during the next intermission you and sierra had made some small talk until you overheard some girls next to you in the pit talking about calum.
“oh i’d totally fuck him.” she says nonchalantly. “i bet you i could easily pull him by the end of the night, i just need to find my way in.” she giggles.
you shift on your feet and turn to sierra who also heard it. “welcome to my life..” she raises her eyebrows then take a sip of her drink.
Tumblr media
you sit in silence on the uber ride back to the hotel. calum sat to your right, you knew he was looking at you and he wanted to ask what was wrong.
did you have a bad night?
was the show bad?
the whole way back to the hotel you hadn’t spoken one word to him. you didn’t even look at him.
why did you feel like this?
calum wasn’t even yours. you had no valid reason to be angry.
except you did.
you were afraid that he would want someone else, that you were easily replaceable. you couldn’t deal with that, you couldn’t go through another heartbreak.
you should’ve known that messing with him would’ve lead to this, but you were naïve and wanted something to distract you from your ex boyfriend.
your feet seem to have a mind of their own as you storm past calum and out into the freezing cold.
"y/n/n, cmon don't be this way", he laughs innocently while pacing himself behind you.
you don’t say anything except press the elevator button and wait impatiently for the doors to open. you really couldn’t tell anyone why you were being so stubborn, hell, you didn’t even know why.
once the doors opened you were quick to slip in and press the button to your floor. you stand with your arms crossed, staring blankly at the metal. doors. you were quietly wishing he would say something, anything at all.
“y/n?” he tries reaching for your arm but you shrug him off. “not in the mood cal.” you reply. you knew you were being stubborn and very annoying.
he hasn’t given you a reason to act this way towards him.
you knew you were overreacting. plain and simple.
*ding*
the elevator doors opened and you walk through the hallway towards your bedroom. you scan the keycard and open the door letting calum follow behind you like a lost puppy.
you throw your purse on the bed and take your jacket off. “y/n. please.” you hear him sigh. calum feels guilty and he doesn’t even know what the hell he did. but whatever it was he was going to fix it. he couldn’t take you being mad at him like that.
“why dont you go bother someone else, looked like there was plenty that would love to be in your bed” you hiss, the words spilling from your lips like venom.
calum stops in his tracks, also removing the leather jacket from his shoulders and tossing it on the bed. “what?” he asks, dumbfounded.
“don’t play dumb, cal.”
“i don’t know what you mean, y/n.” he bites back.
“i mean, if you can sleep around with me what’s stopping you from sleeping with your fans?” you confess.
calum just stares at you, “what? what are you talking about?” the bassist was genuinely confused, you had never reacted, at least, not when he was around.
“the people at the show, cal. the signs, their outfits, the way they talk about you-“
calum cuts you off, “look, i don’t know where this is coming from or why you’re acting like this but-“
“i’m acting like this because it was never just about being friends with benefits calum!” you confess, staring at him intently. “i can’t keep acting like im okay with not being able to love you. i don’t want to be hurt again. not by you”
everything came spewing out of you like a waterfall. all the months of pent up frustration and confusion had finally found its way into the world.
you were so frustrated you didn’t even realize what you had said, you turn to look out the window and stare at the lights from the city.
calum doesn’t say anything, racking his brain to make sure he heard you right. you said you loved him, without really even saying the three words.
“you said you love me.”
you look over at him, “what?”
“you just said you ‘can’t keep acting like you don’t love me’.” he repeats.
you shake your head and look away from him. “i didn’t.” you try to get him to leave it alone.
“you did” he sighs, coming next to you and takes you by the shoulders and turns you to face him. “you practically said you love me.”
“calum-“
“i love you too.” he smiled. “i don’t know if that means anything now but i do. i have for a while.” he confessed.
“y/n, you’re nothing like i imagined you would be. when i met you that night in the bar i thought you’d be like all the other girls, which i know doesn’t help, but; this has been the best past year of my life and i think of you more than someone i fuck occasionally.” calum is looking into your eyes. “you’re more than that, y/n/n.”
there are tears welling in your eyes, you shake your head. “i don’t want to be hurt again. i don’t think i could take it.” calum nods, reaching for your hands.
“i understand, but trust me when i say that id never do anything to hurt you, okay?” calum assures, “you’re everything and more.”
Tumblr media
*buzz*
*buzz buzz*
you groan and reach for your phone, opening one eye to look at the notifications. you have over ten messages and five calls from olivia. you sigh, wanting to ignore her antics but maybe it was an emergency. you unlock your phone and see all the messages.
‘girl check instagram.’
‘what time is it there’s
‘are you asleep?’
‘omg omg y/n!!!!’
‘you’re not gonna believe this.’
‘girl i’m freaking out !!!!!’
‘y/n please check your instagram.
‘you’re gonna flip.’
‘ please wake up.’
‘i’m calling you’
you sit up in confusion and then check your other notifications to see over hundreds of notifications from instagram. “what the hell” you croak and then open the app.
‘calumhood tagged you in a post.’
you swipe through the pictures until you see the very last picture which was you standing in front of the eiffel tower with your back turned to him admiring the view and then you saw the caption; “they say paris is the city of love <3”
you practically shoot up from your position staring wide eyed at the phone. you read some of the comments in a panic.
‘lukehemmings: it’s about damn time’
ashtonirwin: finally! don’t hurt my girl;)
calumhood replying to ashtonirwin: your girl?
ashtonirwin replying to calumhood: yep:)
michaelclifford: called it!
sierradeaton: you posted the pic !! omg !!!
5sos_updates: the last slide omg!?!? also last night was crazy!
iheartcalumhood: who’s the girl?
“calum??” you say out, hoping he was still in the room.
you hear the bathroom door open. “yeah?” he asks walking around the corner only dressed in a pair of basketball shorts.
“why did you post that?” you ask showing him the instagram post. “i wanted to prove to you that everything i said last night is true”
you blink, staring at him with little to no expression. “your first thought to do that was post me on your instagram?”
“uhh i guess? should i not have done that?” you crack a smile and look down at your phone, “i cant believe you, cal.” you say, falling back on the bed to scroll through more comments.
“can’t go back on it now” he says, standing at the foot at the bed.
“you’re stuck with me forever” he says crawling on the bed, hovering over your figure. “really? because ashton said i was his girl. sounds like you have some competition, hood.” you state, showing calum his comment.
he takes your phone and tosses it somewhere else on the bed. “nope, you’re my girl forever and always.” he hums leaning in to leave kisses on your neck which earned giggles from you. “calum!”
101 notes · View notes
stxrliasfics · 2 years
Text
Snuff (lrh oneshot)
Tumblr media
Total Word Count: 1,104
Rating: T
Summary:
“𝘛𝘩-𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘴 𝘨𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘥,” 𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘥 𝘴𝘢𝘪𝘥, 𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘸𝘢𝘵𝘤𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨. 𝘚𝘩𝘦 𝘥𝘪𝘥 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘯 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘦𝘦𝘵 𝘩𝘪𝘮 𝘶𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘭 𝘴𝘩𝘦 𝘨𝘳𝘢𝘣𝘣𝘦𝘥 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘱𝘶𝘳𝘴𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘤𝘩 𝘭𝘢𝘺 𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘥, 𝘪𝘵𝘴 𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘱 𝘴𝘱𝘳𝘢𝘸𝘭𝘦𝘥 𝘰𝘶𝘵. 𝘊𝘢𝘭𝘶𝘮 𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘴𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘩𝘢𝘥𝘰𝘸𝘺 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬 𝘰𝘯 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘦𝘺𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘥𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘳𝘦𝘥-𝘱𝘢𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘭𝘪𝘱𝘴. 𝘏𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘥 𝘢𝘣𝘴𝘰𝘭𝘶𝘵𝘦𝘭𝘺 𝘯𝘰 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘶𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘦𝘳—𝘩𝘪𝘮—𝘢𝘴 𝘔𝘪𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘦𝘭 𝘩𝘢𝘥 𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘤𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘩𝘪𝘮 𝘵𝘰.
Luke just can’t seem to let the love of his life go.
✰ Cross-posted on my ao3 x
✰ Heavily inspired by the music video of 'Snuff' by Slipknot
▬▬ι══════════════ι▬▬
It was a night like this he remembered when the chains barricading his heart had broken free for a bright beauty sauntering before him. She had dazzling eyes, soft skin that felt like the pillowy parts of a cloud, and a voice that the birds all stopped their singing to listen to. And Luke fell for all of it. Every piece of her was his heaven, his safe space. She was a goddess that he kneeled to. Such actions left people dreaming of falling into a relationship like theirs. Only, they didn’t know the half of it. Her selfishness was never something that Luke could admit to. 
Every trace of her seemed to be left in the flat they had once shared. Dust bunnies took shelter in crevices as a result of him not cleaning up in the past month. In his glassy eyes there held another expression—mangled fury.
He circled the room, taking a look at everything and savoring every bit of her as always. The photos of them together, captured by each other’s love. Now it just seemed like they were wearing mere masks.
Luke’s eyes trailed to an empty wine glass, all lonesome sitting on a table near the window. Dust covered the surface as well. A red smudge of what could have only been lipstick started from the rim of the glass. So faint, yet still there. What seemed like another piece of her. He picked it up and examined it before pressing the rim to his lips as if imagining that he was kissing her. Here. In their flat where no one else could get in the way. No one could interrupt them.
Luke pulled away, his eyes transfixed on the faint smudge that had somehow stayed intact. He gripped it—almost entranced. Every word spurted from those beautiful lips. Even the ones that shamed him. They still seemed beautiful when they came from her lips. How did she do that?
He gripped the wine glass even harder without acknowledgment, teeth gritting. The walls seemed to collapse around him while providing images of the past. A past he knows he can’t get rid of even if he tried. She continued to linger in every place he attempted to sweep away.
His grip tightened and tightened, still staring at the red-painted rim. And in a sudden moment, like his bubbling rage, shards and crimson erupted before him. He cried out and let his agony travel out of the cracks of the flat into the hallway. Paralyzed with dejection and anger, everything else on the table came crashing to the floor in Luke’s destructive path. He clawed at his scalp, the blood dripping in plump droplets down his skin. It was amazing how no one in the building bothered to check in. Somehow the man’s sobs weren’t surprising to any tenants residing there. Could they not hear them? Did they just choose not to hear them? Yeah, let the fucker cry all night. He’ll get over it.  
Luke calmed down enough to realize that his hand was wounded and he rushed over to the bathroom down the hall to care for it. He grabbed a small towel from below the counter that held the basin and pressed it down on his wound, wincing. A crimson blotch seeped through the white cloth as he looked into the mirror. Staring back at him was a pale, sweaty, disfigured son of a bitch with no life. A dumb lowlife who let some bitch in red pumps stomp all over him and stand him up like an idiot. No, she wasn’t a bitch. She was my everything. But how could he have been so stupid? Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid! She didn’t really love you! The palm of his terribly bandaged hand repeatedly struck his forehead. The white cloth fell into the sink and blood stained the wet blonde strands covering his eyes. He took another good look in the mirror, wanting so badly to smash it into pieces because of the waste of a man staring back at him—only he had a good mind not to.
Instead, like always, he curled up into the neat bed without pulling back the covers and forced himself into the void of slumber. 
***
It was her never fading light of joy that made men lunge after her. Long blonde waves fell off of her shoulders in the faintest of ways and she wore a skin-tight black dress that hugged every curve of her body. Everything that she did seemed so fragile. From the way she put on her lipstick to the way she hugged her puppy when saying goodbye. She was fragile. However, a festering laceration prevented her from doing too much of these things. It seems as if we all have infected wounds that never truly heal. They grow and fester with parasites and we’re left with them until we die. And death had taken place, but she was still stuck with the remains of the other. 
She slipped her red pumps on whilst wincing, noticing from the corner of her eye a figure in the doorway of her bedroom. Smoothing out her dress and careful not to touch the hurt area, she stood up in front of the mirror that was positioned at the foot of her bed. Her hands traveled up her figure and touched every part as a means of checking herself out. And the man in the doorway, Calum, watched with a somewhat sickened expression.
“Th-This is getting out of hand,” he had said, still watching. She did not turn to meet him until she grabbed her purse which lay on the bed, its strap sprawled out. Calum caught sight of the shadowy look on her eyelids and her red-painted lips. He had absolutely no intentions of humoring her—him—as Michael had instructed him to. What good would it do to stoop down to his level? “You’ve got to stop this. You need help, Luke.”
Upon hearing that, icy blue eyes glared up with such a piercing gaze. Bitter. Ones that were unable to swallow the hard truth that came knocking on the door. Yet, it was replaced immediately—horrifyingly—with that sweet, innocent gaze that she gave to everyone. Fragile. 
“I don’t know what you mean, Cal,” she said in a voice that only made the man’s stomach churn in horror. “Maybe you should go lie down.”
And nothing else was left in that flat but a worried, trembling Calum and the misery that never seemed to go away. She had sauntered off down the hall leaving it all behind.
3 notes · View notes
lipringlrh · 1 year
Text
just being polite - cth
summary: you and calum broke up, but you decide to call him again to tell him you love him.
pairing: calum hood x genderneutral!reader
an: in honour of his birthday:)
word count: ~1250
requested: yes
warnings: phone call, bit of angst, pet names, bit of a cliffhanger
feedback appreciated!!
Tumblr media
...
It'd only been two months since your breakup with Calum and somehow you still managed to miss him more and more each day.
You were still led in bed - even though it was mid-afternoon. You had just finished crying over your third film of the day, each one somehow reminding you more and more of him.
You decided you were going to call him. You missed him too much. Each day you regretted the break up but, after many romantic films, you decided you were going to have you own romance movie and get your happy ending. And you couldn't think of anyone other than Calum.
The break up, per se, wasn't horrible; it was the seeing each other again and again, starting new fights, that was the most painful. It seemed more and more impossible to fall out of love with him. Every time you tried, you heard his voice in the back of your mind, "baby, I am so sorry.”
His voice seemed to just nag you, telling you over and over again he wanted you back. Whether it was true or not, you didn't know, but what you did know was that you wanted Calum back in your life, no matter the circumstances.
And now here you were, deciding to to call him, dialling in his number, which you shamelessly knew off by heart, even planning to lose all your dignity in the process, and beg for him back. Except, maybe without the begging. If he agreed straight away it would be a little less time consuming.
By the third ring, you had always considered hanging up. What if he didn't want you? What if he moved on already? You couldn't bare that thought. It would prove to you how much less he cared about you than he made you believe. You couldn't fathom how he could've possibly got over you in such short time if he really loved you as much as he promised.
However, Calum had seen the call. He'd noticed from the very first ring. He had stared at your name - a little shocked - debating how long to wait until he could answer without seeming desperate.
Calum missed you. More than he ever imagined was possible. He was never told how to get over a true love so had spent his time similarly to you, convinced it was impossible to ever move on.
As much as he missed you, he was a coward, admittedly so, and wouldn't call you. He couldn't handle a bad response. He had never been hurt this badly and hearing you say you didn't want him would break him far from recovery.
He'd never admit it, but scrolling through social media, he found a video explaining how to get someone back thorough manifestation, which he tried with you, and if this call went the way he wanted, it would have successfully worked.
Calum couldn't wait anymore and answered the phone, immediately pulling up to his ear and mumbling a, "hello?"
He heard a sigh of relief from the other end of the phone before hearing a small, "hi," greeted back to him.
The line was silent for a little while before you heard Calum murmur, “why'd you call?"
You could tell he was apprehensive. You were too.
"Just- I wanted to ask how you are?" It came out more as a question. Your hands were getting more sweaty as you were trying not to anticipate the worse response. You were contemplating backing out entirely but a good result was too heavenly.
"You want to ask how I am? That's- that's it?" He scoffed. "The last time you saw me, we were screaming at each other and now you're asking how i am?"
“| was just being polite," you objected, "was trying not to get anyone annoyed." It was like you could feel Calum roll his eyes. All you wanted was a civil conversation and a love confession but seemingly, you'd already failed at one.
You both went silent again, neither knowing what to say. Calum didn't know why he was getting so annoyed. He figured he just needed another way of getting out his emotions other than crying. He knew he'd started off rough, maybe altering the tone of the rest of the conversation, but he was too stubborn to apologise now, especially without knowing the real reason you called.
"Is that all you wanted because I think we're done now.” He spoke, the malice leaving his body the second he finished. His head fell down in regret. He didn't want to finish talking to you; he never wanted to. The thought that he may of just ruined his chances with you, again, sprung back in his mind. Recurring and repeating every second.
"You never actually answered," you responded, "I'm waiting.” You sounded tired. You didn't know if you could handle another conversation like this: tense and argumentative. You just wanted your boyfriend back.
Calum seemed to notice. When he answered, he spoke much more calmly with a hint of sadness in his voice, "I'm fine."
He wasn't fine. If there's anything you learnt from your time together, it was how to tell his emotions. As sick as it sounded, you wanted him to have missed you like you missed him. You'd never want to see him hurt but you wanted him to miss you, to come back and tell you he loved you.
Everything fell silent again..
“I don't want to go," you faltered.
He was quiet; he didn’t know what to say. He knew what he wanted to say but didn’t know if he could admit it to you. Neither of you wanted to be in a vulnerable position. You both felt the love you held for each other but you both couldn’t tell what the other thought was best to do.
“I don’t want you to go either,” he admitted.
Everything fell silent again, you wanted to tell him you loved him but the words felt like sick in your mouth. You didn’t want lose him more than you had - if that was even possible.
“I miss you, Cal,” you paused again, letting everything go quiet. When Calum was about to reply, you interrupted him. You needed to get everything across to him before he had the chance to disagree.
“I miss you so much, Cal. I know we broke up and I know there was so many reasons but none of them matter anymore. I want you, Cal, over everything, and I want us back, please. I lo-“
“Save that for when I see you again, okay baby?” Your stomach fluttered at the nickname. “I miss you too.”
“Where are you at the moment? I want to see you soon.” you whispered, like a secret. You didn’t want to complicate things, you wanted Calum to be comfortable and not rush anything.
“M‘near you. I know it’s late but could i maybe come over? We can talk, try to sort this out properly?” You hummed back as a reply, adding a “please do” to the end.
“I’ll see you in maybe half an hour, that okay?” You nodded before realising then muttered out a yes, walking into your bathroom to see how you look.
“Okay, see you soon baby.”
requests are open, feedback is appreciated!
501 notes · View notes
Text
Hello, friends!! I'm trying to get back into writing fanfiction, and decided I want to write some blurbs! So if you've got any blurb requests please send them in! I write for 5sos and just started writing for Stranger Things! Blurbs will be 100-500 typically. Fluff only for the time being, while I ease myself back into everything!
0 notes
Text
You Are What You Love (l.h)
Pairing: Luke Hemmings x Fem! Reader
Requested? Yes! (requests are currently closed)
Summary: Based on the song "Daylight" By Taylor Swift. Luke's thinking about his perspective of love while he reminisces about when he first met you
Warnings: Fluff, language, mentions of alcohol and toxic relationships. Some grammatical errors (English is not my first language, im sorry)
Word Count: 2.4 k
Author's Note: I just really wanted to write this one and give it my own lil twist. Remember that REBLOGS are super IMPORTANT and so are COMMENTS AND INTERACTIONS. PLEASE SUPPORT YOUR WRITERS. Hope you like it and Happy Reading
My masterlist // tag list in bio!
Tumblr media
The day was getting to him and they’d practically just started. Doing promos all day is something they all got used to when they first started, but it has become repetitive and unhealthy after years of being in the spotlight.
It’s not like Luke isn’t grateful for the opportunity he has of making music with his best friends, he loves what he does and why he’s doing it. But he has to admit priorities have changed for him lately, and being away from home for too long was making him angsty.
“Dude, cheer up!” Ashton would say, giving him a big smile and patting him on the shoulder as they waited for the next interviewer.
Luke would give him a half-hearted, tired smile that mimicked his feelings on the inside. He would see how Michael, Ash, and Calum would joke with each other a little bit, already getting in the mood for another seven minutes of answering questions - although everyone knew Ashton would be speaking the most again, thank you very much. And for a moment it was nice to see them slip from the personas they present in front of the camera and just let them be.
He also took this moment to check his phone and take it out from “do not disturb” when a text message showed up. After reading it his smile was for real this time.
“Is it Y/N?” Michael asked, noticing the grin on Luke’s face.
“Yeah, she says hi”
Quickly, Luke texted you back, noticing the interviewer was already making their way to them. Still, he couldn’t shake the smile off of his face.
* A few years ago.
The party was a success - or a mess if you’re the one cleaning afterward, which is pretty much what Luke promised to do if Ashton threw a party that weekend. This time it took more than ten minutes to convince the eldest of 5sos to throw a party, which is more than anyone would’ve expected coming from him.
“Luke, I already hosted a party three days ago” Ashton sighed while doing the dishes, giving his back to the youngest of the band.
“But Aaaash,” Luke pouted even though Ashton couldn’t see him “It’s the weekend!”
“Don’t you think you like partying too much?”
“Funny you’re saying it,” Luke rolled his eyes, but when he noticed Ashton stare once he turned back, he knew he was serious “C’mon, dude”
“Luke, you’re deflecting” Ashton crossed his arms in front of his chest “Don’t think we don’t notice how you use parties as an excuse to avoid the elephant in the room”
“I’m fine,” He scoffed, and the eldest raised an eyebrow at him.
“Oh? So you’re ready to tell me what happened the day you showed up at my house with your dog and a U-Haul filled with your things?” Ashton sighed again when noticing Luke’s eyes deflecting his gaze “Look, you know I love having you here, but it’s not fun to see you hurting, Luke. Whatever happened with her… you know we’ll support you, right?”
And Luke knew they would. Fuck, Luke loves his friends because of it, they will never leave him behind if the ship was sinking. But the ship was already at the bottom of the ocean and they were still looking for the remains of his broken heart, not knowing there was nothing left to save. Not even himself.
“Luke…”
“Fine, if you don’t want to have a party then forget it,” Luke said, turning around and going to his room.
Ashton groaned loudly and threw his head back before calling out “Okay! We’re having a stupid party! But you’re cleaning up the next day!”
And so came Saturday and the house was packed. Except for one lonely soul sitting outside against the wall, drinking a beer, and not being able to figure out what was so wrong with him. Ashton was right, he was deflecting. But what was wrong with wanting to have a little party to try and forget the past?
The lights were low, so no one could recognize him that easily as he slipped out. The loud noises of the party drowned the sounds of his mind telling him he was the one that fucked up and that he should go back to what he knew was an unhealthy environment. At least that’s a place familiar to him; the feeling of not being enough but still trying to make it up somehow; being the butt of the joke everyone and laughing along even though they never knew the struggle or the pain behind every word or comment he read on the internet.
He was in love, or at least he thought he was. Damn, there was his whole life ahead of him and he thought she’d be by his side through all of it. But love doesn’t have to be black and white, it doesn't have to make you doubt every single word or move or Instagram post. He never thought love could be so cruel… or maybe he didn’t know what love was after all.
What’s worst of it all is that he knew he hurt some people along the way. Fuck, he even made Ashton throw him a party every week to try and cheer him up even though everyone knew it was all a charade. After everything that he did wrong, his friends are still there for him when he least deserves it. All because he was too hung up to see the reality, or too scared to face it.
Still, at least he was sound of mind and heart and didn’t plan to go back to her, even if that meant waking up and facing the unknown future again.
“Cheers to that,” He mumbled as he brought the beer bottle he was nursing to his lips.
“Amen,” A voice said behind him, making him spill his drink all over his shirt “Oh shit! Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you”
Luke wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, counting to ten in his head so that he won’t curse this person out. But soon a hand was stretched out to him, offering some napkins to clean himself out.
Finally, his blue eyes were able to look at the person who so rudely interrupted his self-deprecating moment. And for a second there he was speechless.
“I’m truly sorry,” The girl gave him a shy, awkward smile, “I thought you heard me get out and- Well, that’s what I get for trying to be funny, I guess”
Luke blinked up at her, losing his train of thought when he noticed how cute she looked when blushing and the way her eyes sparkled before she looked down. He couldn’t help but chuckle as he accepted the napkins.
“It was funny,” He said, dabbing his shirt “I always hated this shirt anyways, so thank you for helping me get rid of her”
The girl smiled “I don’t know if you’re making fun of me… but, yeah, that shirt is very 2015”
Luke fake gasped in surprise “Are you saying I have bad taste?”
“I’m saying that maybe you did but are now repenting for your sins”
“So quick-witted”
“One of my many talents”
“What’s another one?”
“I can run faster than a wolf”
“Don’t you get tired?” He asked, scooting to his side so that she could sit beside him. She did.
“Maybe when I do I’ll finally find the place that makes me what to stay” She shrugged “Do you have a talent?”
“I can’t seem to differentiate heroes from villains”
She looked at him, resting her chin on her hand “What do you think I am, then?”
“I don’t know yet” He laughed, looking back at her and getting lost in her eyes for a second before asking “Should I be offended you'd rather be out here than at my party?”
“Should I be offended that the host of the party would rather sit outside in the cold than at his own party?” She challenged him “My friend dragged me here, but I’m not much of a social butterfly and I need a moment to charge my battery before she tries to set me up with another stranger”
“Ooff, tough crowd?”
“The toughest”
“Good.” Luke said, leaning back and looking up at the sky “Easiest way not to get hurt”
“Maybe,” She shrugged. “But if we don’t get hurt once in a while then why bother to feel anything at all?”
Luke turned to her, frowning as he examined her face. “Did Ashton send you here?”
The girl looked at him quizzically, “I literally have no idea who Ashton is, but if he’s like- I don’t know, your “guide” in the universe, then maybe?”
Luke laughed “He’s my co-host”
“Oh! The one singing “I will survive” in karaoke! Yeah, no, I haven’t talked to him. But if you want me to call him I could-”
“No!” Luke said way too quickly and she noticed that as well “I mean if he sees me he’ll know he’s right and I would rather eat another one of Calum’s veggie lasagnas than do that”
“Ouch, tough crowd?”
He groaned “You have no idea”
“I might, a little bit”
“Yeah?” He bumped her arm with his “What’s your story then?”
“Who wants to know?”
“Luke,” He said, extending a hand for her to shake.
“Y/N,” She took his hand in hers, shaking it firmly “Well, Luke, I’ll tell you mine if you tell me yours”
“And if we never want to see each other after we do?”
“Then that’s a risk we’ll both have to take”
*
The memory faded as he noticed all eyes were on him.
Shit.
At least there’ll be more elevator memes after this interview.
“Sorry, could you repeat the question, please?” Luke asked, ignoring Calum’s chuckle.
“Of course!” The interviewer smiled “I said that you were one of the main writers in almost every song of this album. What’s the inspiration behind it?”
“Oh,” It was an easy answer, of course, something he had rehearsed with the guys beforehand. But as the memory of your first encounter was still so fresh, another answer came to mind “Love,”
“Love?”
“Well, I guess that the right way to say it would be the feeling you get when you know you’re safe” He started, “When you feel safe around that special someone, no judgment nor fears or doubts. When that person means the world to you and you would do anything to give it to them just to see the smile on their face even for just a second. Or when you make a mistake and you’re willing to put everything on the line to try and make it right, just hoping the other one will forgive you when you think you least deserve it. “I had my doubts about love for quite some time. Thinking I was defined by it when we just create the context ourselves when we find the right person to share that love with. I always believed love would be…”
“Burning red?” Michael smiled, finding the words right out of Luke’s mouth.
“Yeah,” He smiled “But love is not supposed to burn or to hurt. Love is supposed to keep us warm and safe. Love is golden, like daylight”
“But not our old song Daylight,” Ashton said, making everyone laugh “That truly was a mistake”
“But it is part of our history,” Calum added.
“Like heartbreaks and hurt,” Luke chimed in, going back to the original question “But without them, is it even worth feeling anything at all? They’re just passing by until you find the place you want to stay, with the ones you love”
Luke watched with a smile as the other guys answered the rest of the questions, knowing full well that this is where he was meant to be. But there was someone missing.
*
The car dropped him off first, his friends all saying their goodbyes or see you tomorrow and saying I love you to him before he got out. He cracked his back before he grabbed his bag and made his way to the front door, waving one last time at the guys.
The moment he crossed the door he hung his keys and got rid of his boots. He was about to call your name when a faint mixture of sounds got to him. He frowned as he walked toward the living room, quickly finding you under a pile of blankets, wearing his hoodie and with an arm wrapped around a very sleepy Petunia whose snores were drowned out by the sounds on your phone.
Luke smiled as he shook his head, walking over to his two girls and sliding down next to you, wrapping you with his arms.
“What’ you doing?” He said, kissing you on the cheek “Are you- are you watching 5sos TikToks?”
“What can I say?” You said, turning into his embrace and facing him “You guys are very entertaining”
You ignored the rolling of his eyes as you leaned over to kiss him sweetly on the lips, feeling how he relaxed against you.
“Hi,” You mumbled once you pulled back just enough to have only your noses touching.
“Hi, darling” Luke smiled, kissing you briefly one more time.
“Long day?”
“The longest without you”
“Sap” You giggled, trying to scurry away before his hands found your waist and started to tickle it, but not being able to succeed.
This is what he meant about love. Coming home after a long day and having your laugh be music to his ears. Being able to touch you and kiss you like it was the first time every time. Just relaxing with you on the couch with your dog, watching hours and hours of tiktoks before any of your stomachs started to grumble. Talking about your respective days while you cook dinner together with Fleetwood Mac’s music surrounding the house, listening to all the good and the bad and the ugly, and just being there for each other.
The words “I love you” never made sense to him before you came along. But when you kiss him goodnight and whisper those words to him, he knows them to be true. And when he says them back, he knows he’s falling short. Because a love like that is impossible to describe.
A love like that is golden. A love like that is kind.
So every night he adds:
“Loving you is the best thing I have” * * tags: @iknowyouthinkimbulletproof @mystic-232 @talksoprettyjjx @theshyspy @hoodhoran @hoodharlow @littledrummeraussie @bubblegum183 @irwin-fletcher-ash @wiiildflowerrr @another-lonely-heart @aabc5sauce @in-superbloom @sadcupofcoffee @personalmuyverypersonal @vtte @as-hs-blog @himbohood @sofiaaraee @irwindoll @weasleytwinscumslut @fairytrice @colourfulcal @nibin0912 @hfkait @savagejane1 @youneedtocalumdown @ashtonsunflower @nicebasscalum @calumspupils @secretsicanthideanymore @alltimesos @wontlastimokwiththat @whywontyoulovemecami @theimpossiblehologramtree @perriexed @abiancajg @rewmuslupin @icelily13 @bookthingz @gracieboogirl @fastandtheformula1 @kingxnichole @wildflower98
182 notes · View notes
lovermine · 2 years
Text
posting this because for some reason it wont show up in any of the tags (it seems to be doing this with my fics idk) but i wrote a fluffy michael oneshot and would love for u guys to check it out <3
5 notes · View notes
lovesosweeet · 4 months
Text
Tumblr media
KNOW IT ALL x THE BAND CAMINO
part 1
a calum hood songfic
Tillie Beckett isn’t known for sticking around, and maybe that’s why touring had come so naturally to her, even as an amateur when she first began as an opener for 5 Seconds of Summer a few years ago… hopping from city to city, bed to bed, hookup to hookup. She broke hearts and left messes behind. And she didn’t care about it all, too wrapped up in whatever whirlwind she found herself in next.
The habits became religion as she propelled to stardom. Her music — angsty, energetic, unapologetic, and unpolished — took the charts by storm following her self-titled album’s debut. Her words were raw and honest, and they resonated with her audience, with upbeat and electric sounds that even the grouchiest and grumpiest of listeners couldn’t help but nod along to. It was the perfect mix of relatable and catchy, and that’s what made her the perfect opener for 5SOS.
Ashton had found Tillie’s videos on Instagram, where she often teased her emotional and early versions of songs she was writing. Her raspy voice caught his attention quickly, and he became a follower very early on, before she’d gone viral… which, she has done several times now. When 5SOS was prepping their latest tour, he threw Tillie’s name out as his top choice as an opener, and the rest of the band quickly supported it after they watched her cover of their very own, very old song “Lost Boy” and put a fresh spin on it. It was a song that the band themselves had honestly forgotten about that she gave an entirely new life. They were hooked and called her just hours after Ashton’s initial suggestion to offer her the spot.
Her friendship with the Australian quartet was forged in what, at the time, seemed to be an unbreakable bond. She was invited to dinner at Luke’s house to review the plans, the money, and all the other logistics of the tour, but the nitty gritty was long forgotten as the five of them stayed up until the sun rose the next day, just talking, jamming, drinking, and smoking the stars out of the sky.
She and Calum weren’t instant friends, at least, not the way she was with Michael. Tillie and Michael had bonded instantly over being gamers with an affinity for ever changing hair colors. He could also dress in her wardrobe and no one would’ve been able to guess that they weren’t his clothes, that is, if her clothes were big enough to fit the 6-foot-something Australian giant, since she was a mere 5 feet tall.
But, her friendship with Michael isn’t what landed her on the cover of tabloids.
No, the pictures of hers and Calum’s necks covered in matching bruises were what landed on the homepages of gossip websites. The videos of her and Calum whispering in what they thought were private corners of dive bars spread like wildfire amongst their somewhat overlapping fan bases. Them stumbling down the cobblestoned sidewalks of Montreal, hand in hand, for an impromptu “bachelor party” for Michael littered their tagged photos on Instagram for weeks.
It was a pair nobody expected but nobody questioned. It wasn’t predictable but it made sense.
At least, it did to Calum.
part 2
my masterlist! :)
A/N: hi i’m actually quite stoked about this one?!?!! sorry to anyone who wanted a self insert i personally feel more comfy in the OC x RP world and that technically won my poll! feels easier to separate as fiction/“characters” :)
28 notes · View notes