ENTP Confession Number 5

There is always at least one bruise on my leg from my fights with inanimate objects.

Standards of Cleanliness

XSTJ: Everything must be perfectly in order, and my folders must be alphabetized and color coded. And there will be absoultely no germs left after I fumigate this room with Lysol...(etc.) XNTP: No cockroaches are allowed in any of my piles of random sh*t, except for Jimmy and his friends. You guys can stay for as long as you need...It is so amusing to observe you. *places a cracker near Jimmy*

ENTP's Secret

*There is a lull in the conversation between ENTP and INFJ* ENTP: You know, I have been wanting to tell you something for a while now... INFJ: Hmm? ENTP: It's really important though, so please keep it between the two of us. INFJ: I'll keep it a secret. I promise. ENTP: All right. ENTP: *Leans In* ENTP: *Whispers* Pocky INFJ: *Is dissatisfied on an existential level* ENTP: *laughs*

All That The Intuitives Need

ENFJ: Love, canned or powdered

INFJ: Coffee, some reading material, and annoying people to leave them alone

ENTJ: An army to command

INTJ: A DIY become an evil overloard kit

INFP: A clear answer to the meaning of life, and a couple of chill pills

ENFP: Liquified rainbows to drink and a way to capture all of the ideas that flash by too quickly

ENTP: A wikihow article and the materials to create a universe… and someone with the same items to compete with

INTP: An infinite supply of batteries to charge themselves and the gadgets that they are physiologically dependant on

☕️ ❤️ #happyvalentinesday 🤗

Have a happy, sad, salty, productive, philosophical, lonely, beautiful, disasterous, regrettable, irreplaceable, mushy, cold, or slimy Valentine's Day. Whichever you prefer. Or all of the above. Or an adjective I didn't list. Or...

ENTP on Valentine's Day

xNxJ: *likes being right*

xxTP: *likes proving others wrong*

The NXPs With 50 Followers

INFP: Wow, this is so amazing to be able to express myself and have people read it. I’m so happy that people appreciate my feelings and style and ayysthetic..and this part that no one else notices and that part that no one else cares about and stuff…

ENFP:Yay!! (It’s one AM, and they are feeling social. They message every single one of their followers about completely different random things while blasting a mix of death metal, traditional African folk songs, and girly J-pop music)

ENTP: (after three weeks of forgetting the blog existed) I have fifty followers? I knew this blog was a good idea! Now I’ll get to tell ISTJ that I was right…

(Debates for a bit in their head with ISTJ, but then ends up thinking about whether single celled organisms have morals. Posts about it, and when fifty more followers show up, the cycle repeats.)

INTP: (looks at all of the blog’s statistics meticulously)

…my first step to world domination might just be arriving…

ENTP Confession Number 4

This, or something of a similar nature, is always present on at least a few neurons

ENFJ: You know, I'd better reblog this. It would be terrible to lose all of my friends. Say, ENTP, are you afraid of losing anything?

ENTP:... ... My lymph nodes...

The ENTP Life Cycle

Ok everybody! Take out a sheet of paper for your notes on today's lesson... After the brief larval stage of the ENTP, where it begins to display such characteristics as hyperactivity, argumentativity, and an excessive imagination, even for the typical toddler, the ENTP will alternate between the two primary phases of its life cycle. These phases are commonly known as the idea phase and, for lack of a better term, the non-idea phase. During the idea phase, the ENTP becomes fixated on a grandoise but clear vision of some (often trivial) plan, concept or psychological construct. The typical speech pattern of this phase is something like: ...idea. Idea! I have an IDEA!!! I have to tell you my idea! This idea is going to fix all of our problems and I will be rich and powerful and the world will love me and be such an amazing place and I will be happy and rainbow unicorns...because I have THE IDEA!!!!!!! I can't wait to see my idea become something amazing! Idea, idea, idea, idea, idea, IdEa, iDea, IIIIIDDDDDEEEEEEAAAAA!!! If others question this idea, the ENTP is usually able to prove to the critic, or at least convince them, that their idea is actually worth their excitement. This is accomplished through the ENTP's adaptations causing their innate charm and skill with rhetorical appeals, which will be further discussed in a later lesson. After about two hours, the ENTP will fully transfer into the non-idea phase, where all of their earlier motivation is lost due to lack of motivation, external stimuli, and, of course, their predicatble spiral into boredom. The typical speech pattern, if there is any vocalization, goes something like this: I'm so bored. I've worked on all of my projects and there's no more (the organism's favorite media) out now, and I don't want to clean up (the ENTP's nest is not typically organized). Maybe I'll take that quiz my friend sent me earlier...Actually I am too lazy to get up. Wait, I had an idea? I can work on it later. Some scientists theorize that the purpose of this extreme inactivity is to conserve energy for the next idea phase, in addition ro allowing for the intake of nutrients and time to replenish energy lost during the previous idea phase. This wasteful cycle repeats until the eventual death of the ENTP, and loss of the genes that it contributed to the gene pool, unless it can somehow complete the idea in finished form and spread it in less than two hours. The next generation of ENTP can stem from this exchange, in a process that we will cover next lesson.

the types when they want something (tumblr stereotype edition)

sneaks into their parents' Amazon account: INTP, ENTP, INTJ, ENTJ

makes it themselves: ESTP, ISTP

buys it with their own money: ISFJ, ISTJ, ESTJ, ESFJ, INFJ, ENFJ, ESFP, ENFP

"flower crowns are free though..." : ISFP, INFP

1000000% proud to be an ENTP

You are the most undignified dignified person I know.

INTP to ENTP

ENTP Confession Number 4

I haven't made a single post on this blog without making a typo and fixing it an hour or so later.

(In the car, passing by the neighborhood lake)

ESTJ: Because of the toxic runoff from the fretilizer they use, you shouldn't eat the fish from that lake.

ENTP: But what if there were fish in the sky?

ESTJ: *is super confused* What?

ENTP: We could grow fish in the sky, and then go up in a helicopter and catch them with a giant net!!!!

ESTJ: But fish wouldn't survive in the sky, and there's still pollution in the air.

ENTP: *is sucked into the world of ideas* BUT IT'S FISH IN THE SKY!!!!!!

NT Problems

Teacher: You don't need to understand it, you just need to know it.

NT: Then what's the point?

I wonder how long I am going to have to hang out with you in order to become clinically insane.

INFP to ENTP