Whoever is in charge of this dimension must be an intern. I support the learning process but dude……. do less.

I think extroverted people are more mysterious than the introverted . No one genuinely asks us why we are so loud , why we rely on the attention , why we will talk to anyone about anything. It’s not for vanity , it’s security . Knowing you’re heard even if it’s ridiculous , it’s knowing you’re not alone in the silence of the world. The silence that keeps you up at night and terrifies your soul fore in that silence is when your brain and your heart feel the loudest and most terrifying . Sensory deprivation turns into sensory overload. Every instinct in your body expecting something loud and awful to come from that silence so you scare it away by bearing bigger and louder than it . Maybe then it’ll back off. Being loud means you have the upper hand , You’re both the offense and defense against the nightmares wanting to face you and shove their way into every sliver of your being.

Theres a lot of trauma in being the friendliest person in the room. Being so means you were once the loneliest person and you probably still feel like you are the only person without a true friend. Sure everyone thinks you’re friends but they all think you have so many who’d die for you that they don’t bother to add themselves in. So when the grim reaper comes to collect, you stand waiting because it’s a long walk to wherever you two are going and maybe just then you’ll have that friend who’d walk into hell for you .

Day 7: The Universe Spoke Today...

and it said, "You deserve a little something". After months of applying to jobs I was overqualified for and uninterested in, I woke up feeling oddly positive and got the call that the 1 dream position I applied for, wanted me on ASAP! Sometimes the universe speaks and she gives you a win to remind you shes on your side.

Feeling good ,

Quarter-life crisis

There is someone out there with less qualifications than you living your dream because they had the audacity. Get audacious!

Day 6 : Death to Diets

I heard a quote of a mom teaching her child about food the other day that said " There is food we eat that is good for our body and our minds happiness. We should eat those all the time. But there is also the food we eat for our soul (Oreos, candy, cakes, etc.) and those are just as important but we eat them less so that our body can stay strong enough to enjoy them.". I broke down for about 15 minutes hearing that. If I had been told this at 13 what would my life look like now? Wherever this mom is, thank you for helping the reversal of eating disorders that have been and could've been.

Hungrily,

Quarterlifecrisis

Day 5 : Funeral No. 5

This is the time when a lot of family gets older and passes on. Each is tragic in its own way. Cancer, diseases, age; although sad and heartbreaking there is still sometimes a sense of peace at the end, these loved ones feel no more pain and burden. This SHOULD NOT be the age where your friends start dying too. The finite of life should still be far away, there should not be such pain that one wants to escape from permanently at this age, but there is. And it is you now that must take on their burdens and more because you were not at peace and unprepared for this kind of tragedy. It is not natural to be so young and mortal. Live a little longer each day please, my heart can bear no more funerals.

sick of this shit,

Quarterlifecrisis

Day 4: ZZzzZZzz

The couch is both my best friend and my worst enemy. It threatens me with comfort and yet my most agonizing moments are always lying down.

lazily,

Quarterlifecrisis

Day 3: Why are you the best candidate for this job?

I'm passionate. I also know I'm young but my soul withers like the willow tree I almost hit this morning driving in because the debt collector was blowing up my phone demanding the $500 it took in order to save my kidneys from failing after the boy that abused me for hours and days on end wouldn't let me leave the bed with his filth between my legs because " I was so good it would be a waste to let me go even for a moment".

I'm a team player. And yes I know I'm young but I can barely work Microsoft Excel let alone social media. I would rather sit all day underneath the willow tree and write love poems to a man I will never meet because I will be working at this job until the day I die or until you fire me because I worked too much overtime covering the single mom who had to go get her kids from daycare because their baby daddy is in jail again for selling cocaine in order to pay child support and the rent.

Im dependable. Again yes I know I'm young for this position, but Im not like those tik tok kids you see flaunting their old money like I flaunted my ripped jeans in elementary school not because it was in fashion but because mom didn't get paid for another 2 weeks and I had already torn through my new school clothes in the first quarter so, I have to make it work.

I'm smart and trainable. I know I am young for this position but I did attend college and received my bachelors in a field and my family friend said once when I was 16 and we were in his motel room, that I was very mature for my age and could learn a thing or two before going off to college next year so that I wasn't shocked by the things all those "college boys" would ask me to do with them. I trained for an entire summer and was once shocked by what those boys asked me to do.

I know Im young for this position but the price of living is way too damn high and no one cares about the blood, sweat, tears, hours, and years that I put into making myself wantable enough for at least a job to need me and say they're proud of me. So here I am applying for the 50th $17.50 job that I'm overqualified for because the field I have a degree in is nothing but sorrow and lies and politics and I was never all that good at making a difference.

But I'm passionate.

Best,

Quarterlifecrisis

Cause with my mid-youth crisis all said and done I need to be youthfully felt 'cause, God, I never felt young. -Hozier

I offer the world my existence and that is enough. For my existence has sparked a chain of events that would not have happened if I were not here. THAT is my legacy.

Grief is love with nowhere to go; running wild.

Day 2 : It's Deafening

I am shouting into the abyss and even my echo won't return my call. How can one so desperately love living also dread the seconds that tick by with infinite suffocating silence?

Desperatley,

Quarter life Crisis

Day 1: Soul crisis

I think I existed a long time ago during the time of magic and dragons and fantasy. I think I lived when the stories we deem fairytales were spoken like truth and people spent their lives venturing to find it or passed by in life content with the knowledge of what lurked outside of their small villages. I think I lived when life was romantic and now my soul feels empty and longing for what it once knew. For simplicity yet adventure. For peace. It’s like my heart remembers what it used to have. I get glimpses of feelings and sensations that are not of this time or world; like I am remembering what it was like before. The way the sun hits the trees and the way the wind smells. The perfect song of many birds and the quiet between the noise. The older I get the louder that quietness becomes. Beckoning me back to her. Desperately clawing at the remnants of a life once lived and loved. But now my soul is trembling with the fear it may never see a life like that again. It will never feel what it is like to spend the day not worrying about the next, what it is like to have the grass and dirt, wet between our bodies' toes and laugh. Completely laugh. Laugh out of pure joy and not out of desperation to feel it. To smile and have someone look in the eyes of that smile and smile back because they have never seen something so beautiful. Souls connecting. I think I lived in those times.

I think I lived in a time when war was brutal and far away. When war was for love and land childish games of strength. War was stealthy and planned like a game of chess. The war my soul knows now is dodgeball and it is constantly watching from the sidelines while other souls are being pelted in the gut. The war my soul knew was brutal yes but there was honor in fighting it. There is no honor in this world, there is just devastation and corruption.

My souls screams to go back before it forgets what it once was.

Longingly,

Quarterlife crisis