You’d be stupid to think andrew doesn’t creep up behind people in his maserati and rev the engine or honk the horn to scare the fuck out of them
just picture it
neil and kevin wake up at the ass crack of dawn to go for a run
Andrew: creeps up in the maz and revs the engine
neil and kevin: shitting themselved out of fear
Andrew: kevin, give me back my boyfriend
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aftg
Neil: im fine
Dan: no ur not, what wrong Neil
Neil: wouldn’t you like to know, weather boy
Dan, under her breath: I swear on the fucking exy season,
Dan screaming: Nicky Esteban Hemmick and Matt Donovan Boyb, if you keep teaching him fucking pop culture references I swear to god when i get my hands on you!!!
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Kevin Day’s gay awakening
Little bit of gay awakening angst. I personally head canon Kevin as pan, but that is just my personal thought so think of him however you want. Not really any triggers, but I did write Nicky differently because I don't like how Nora wrote him and I want him to be a good friend and person.
He lay in his bed wide awake, despite it being close to one in the morning. He could feel his heart pounding in his chest, and the breathing of the boys around him. Dorms had been reconfigured a bit at the start of the year. Aaron, Nicky and Matt shared a room now and Andrew, Neil, and Kevin had the other. Andrew and Neil were curled around each other on the bigger bed across the room. Kevin laid alone in his loft bed. He had pushed his book shelf against his bed at the beginning of the school year, to box himself in more. Kevin enjoyed smaller spaces; they made him feel safe. He heard one of the boys, probably Andrew, move in his sleep. Kevin wished sometimes that someone could lay in his bed. He wished he could lay against someone and feel the warmth of their body against his, their breathing underneath him, hear their heartbeat as he lay his head on their chest, warm arms wrapped around him, holding him close. Kevin felt like his mind was eating him alive. The foxes had held a banquet that day, and Kevin had found himself spending most of it talking with Jeremy. The Ravens had attended and at first sight began to ridicule Kevin. He let it happen until Jeremy grabbed him away and dragged him to a table in the corner. They had made conversation with him the entire night. Kevin hadn’t felt so cared for in a while. He didn’t feel like he did though when Nicky hugged him goodnight, or when the upper class man finally invited him somewhere, or when Wymack invited him over for dinner and they talked about Exy and cars and Kayleigh Day. This care made Kevin’s stomach hurt and his head spin. He had never felt so comfortable about casual and genuine small talk. Jeremy made that easy and throughout their conversation Kevin had begun to realize more about Jeremy. The way his eyes lit up when he talked about his interests, his hair and how soft and fluffy it was, his deep blue eyes, the way he smiled and the freckles that danced across his face, the blush on his cheeks when Jean joined them. Kevin felt sick to his stomach when they bid each other goodbye.
Now hours later Kevin found himself staring at the ceiling. His mind spun and he found himself questioning things about himself he had never questioned before. Kevin knew he found women attractive, but he also knew that he had found Jeremy attractive. Kevin crawled out of his bed as quietly as possible. He creeped into the living room and threw himself down onto the couch. Kevin couldn't risk Andrew waking up and seeing this. He pulled out his phone and searched up the word gay to start. Kevin immediately knew it wasn’t him. He liked women. He typed again. ‘I like women and men’. The search results he got seemed more relatable, but not quite right. Kevin found himself scrolling through articles and blogs, looking at flags and definitions. He finally found himself pausing upon a yellow, pink and blue flag. “Pansexual” he read. Kevin thought. He liked this. He realized he had never really cared about the gender of who he liked, and more or less just liked the person, but had only dated Thea who just happened to be a woman. Kevin found himself scrolling farther in the website and coming across a page labeled “Pronouns and how they work” He clipped on it hesitantly. Kevin read further and further, his brow creased with tension. He read about neo pronouns and gender neutral terms. How the nonbinary umbrella worked and the labels under it. Kevin felt his eyes well up with tears. He had never known so much about himself so fast before. It was like a great tsunami wave hitting him at once.
Footsteps broke the silence.
“Kevin what the hell are you doing awake?”
Kevin dropped his found onto the carpeted floor in shock, hoping he had turned it off. Nicky stood in front of him wearing one of Erik’s sweatshirts he had stolen last time he visited Germany.
“Nothing, why are you awake?” He responded.
He hoped Nicky couldn’t see the tears on his cheeks or hear the way his voice shook.
“I thought I heard crying, wanted to make sure you were okay… Are you okay?”
Kevin nodded quickly, hoping Nicky would just leave. To his dismay Nicky plopped down onto the couch next to him, touching shoulders.
“What’s wrong?” He asked the green eyed boy.
Kevin let out a big sigh. He didn’t quite understand himself yet and Nicky was probably his best option for help.
“How… how did you know you were gay?” He asked quietly.
Nicky’s brow furrowed. He was shocked by the question but answered.
“I guess it’s just always been boys. Growing up, all my friends found girlfriends and had crushes on girls but I never did. I just didn’t like girls and then I kissed a boy and realized I was gay.” He responded, quickly following it up.
“Do you think you’re gay?”
Kevin shook his head.
“I definitely like women.”
“But you like men too?”
Kevin sighed and nodded, looking down at his lap. He felt Nicky wrap an arm around his shoulder and rub his arm.
“Do you think you’re bisexual?”
Kevin shook his head.
“I think pansexual. I know bi and pan are similar but pansexual just feels more comfortably, I don’t know.” He finished quietly.
Nicky dropped his head onto Kevin’s shoulder.
“Anything else, you can tell me anything?” He whispered back.
Kevin hesitated, but if anyone on the team would know about this it would probably be Nicky.
“Do you know how he/they pronouns work?” He asked, feeling another teardrop fall down his cheek.
“Yeah, Erik’s friend Michael uses them, so does Jeremy Knox. They’re all out by the way. I'm not like outing them or anything.” He clarified the last bit.
Kevin wiped his cheek.
“I wanna try he/they pronouns. I don’t know if I like them, but i just wanna try them out.” He admitted.
Nicky pulled him closer.
“Of course, do you want me to not use them around the team?”
Kevin nodded. He didn’t feel ready for anyone to know about him yet.
“Yes. Can we just keep it a secret for now?” He asked.
Nicky nodded and said “take all the time you need.”
Kevin found himself doing something out of his comfort zone and reached over, grasping Nicky’s hand in his own scarred one. Nicky key responded by pulling into a tight hug. Kevin buried his head into Nicky's shoulder and felt his friend's warm hand rub between his shoulder blades, easing some of his stress.
“Thank you” he whispered, muffled by Nicky’s sweater.
“Of course. I’m very proud of you.” His friends responded.
Kevin and Nicky released each other from their hug and talked a little longer. Kevin found himself walking back to his room a bit later, and climbing into bed. He still longed to share it with someone else, but for now he felt a little more comfortable with the idea of who he would share it with. Kevin drifted off to sleep, his mind at ease over all the confusion he had experienced. Sure, he was still a little lost, but he felt like he had found a map to help him get the rest of the way out.
I know a lot of people have different opinions on the bi and pan label. This is a personal head canon and I am venting through Kevin right now. I am a pan person, and the way Kevin describes just being more comfy with pan labels is how I feel personally although everyone’s experience is different.
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