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won4ver · 4 days
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THE CHERRY FRANCHISE IS ABSOLUTELY ALLURING
thank you, pretty!! i swear nothing compares to cherry flavoured things, it’s too perfect for any genre
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won4ver · 11 days
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hey guysss!! i just wanted to say that i won’t be posting anything else on this account, everything will now be posted from just @sincerelyrki ♡ ill keep some posts up but ill be deleted the majority of them because i really don’t like them at all and i feel like i could do better??
all future work (series, oneshots, etc) will all be posted under @sincerelyrki !! at first i wanted to keep both accounts separate (like smau and written) but now…
i’ll probably be deleting more than half of my works, maybe more. so i’m sorry if i removed one that you liked🙏 maybe one day ill rewrite some, we’ll seeee
i’ll link all remaining works under my @sincerelyrki masterlist (aswell as leaving them here)!!
for all requests (which i’m taking so long to write but i promise they’re comingggg) ill also be posting them on @sincerelyrki
anyways thank you again to everyone 🤍
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won4ver · 11 days
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THANK YOU PRETTY🤭🤭🤭
✈︎ greedy
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heeseung was greedy. he was addicted to the feeling of you, he needed you.
pairing : idol!exbf!heeseung x idol!fem!reader
warnings + genre : suggestive. heeseungs lowkey a freak but that’s alright. jealousy. he’s angry. mentions of killing someone in a fit of rage. swearing. reader is a member of lesserafim. heeseung fights someone. blood from a cut. heeseung whimpers. doesn’t say but they’re at an award show after party, hence why they’re both there.
wc : 1.8k
a/n : i’m back guys 😝 after not posting for like two months or something, i’ve been so busy but now that the holidays have passed my schedule has been readjusting. anyways check out my upcoming niki smau [ PIKA PIKA ] on my other acc @sincerelyrki
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Heeseung was greedy.
Shivers ran down his body as his head tilted back, eyes screwing up as if he were in pain. But he was in pain, being without you was the worst feeling in the world. He could never get enough of you, his memories from your shared nights doing nothing more than making this more unbearable for him. He could never get enough of you.
All he could think about was your body against his, hands slithering up his body, touching him everywhere. His skin burned as the memories came in, enflaming everywhere you’ve ever touched.
He could feel his jaw ticking as his fists clenched, he needed you to finish talking to finish talking with those fucking perverted men whose eyes never left your body and come back to him so that he could show you how much better he was. How much better he could make you feel, no one could ever compare to how good he can make you feel.
His eyes opened in a blaze as his nails broke the skin of his palms, trickles of blood dripping down his calloused fingers. His eyes burned holes into the man who thought he had the right to put his arm around your waist, Heeseung simply scoffed at the thought.
How dare that disgusting man think he could touch his girl, he was going to kill him. He would make the man get on his knees for you, make him thank you for allowing him to be in your presence. One thank you for each passing second, and right now he’s over four hundred and eight seconds.
You could feel the heavy gaze of the brooding man sitting on the other side of the room, eyes narrowed at the arm of the random man around you.
You knew who he was, and it felt like the perfect time to make him feel the way you felt the night he left you. you were going to destroy him, and he was going to let you. he’d let you do anything to him as long as it was happening to him, you weren’t allowed to even think of other men.
Without turning to look behind you your body turned towards the man who you now recognized as your high school biology partner, Park Hanbin. As if feeling your gaze the slightly taller man beside you turned his head to make direct eye contact with you.
A genuine smile came onto your face, a loud gasp coming from your mouth as you took him in. He looked overall the same but someone was different, another gasp left your mouth as you finally noticed what was off. “You finally dyed your hair!” Hanbin bit his lip as he gave you a sheepish shy smirk, cheeks turning red as your attention was completely on him.
He leaned his head forward as your hand came up to run through his hair, but since his eyes were focused on you he missed the taller man who was now directly against you, glaring at him as the world burned around them.
Heeseung was almost certain smoke was coming from his ears, rage consuming his body from his feet to chest. “Don’t fucking touch her” He growled out as he pulled you behind him, detaching Hanbins hold on your waist in the process.
You froze as you were shoved behind Heeseung, his right hand pressing against your back, pushing your body against his. You could feel his body shaking, yet the hand holding him against you was as gentle as possible.
Due to having Heeseungs taller body in front of you, your vision was constricted, the sight of Hanbin completely disappearing as Heeseungs leather jacket appeared.
You could faintly hear your members whispering near you, Yunjin trying to stomp over to the two of you only to stop as Sakura and Chaewon held her in place. You could hear her loud cursing, Heeseungs name falling from her mouth in a cluster of insults.
“Don’t think about touching my girl again” Heeseung tried to say quiet enough so that you wouldn’t hear him, knowing that you would later curse him out for his displaced possession over you.
“Didn’t think she was your girl was you were all over that random girl in the tabloids last week” Hanbin taunted the raging boy in front of him, smirking as Heeseung grew stiff as the words left his mouth. “What? Speechless? Everyone knows what happened, what you did”
Heeseung swore his heart skipped five beats, dropping at the same time the loud music surrounding them did. the strobe lights made him dizzy as he felt nauseous, he was going to throw up. “What girl?” His hand left your back and he grabbed Hanbins jacket, pulling the shorter boy up to his face.
“What the fuck are you talking about?” Loud ticking entered Heeseung’s ears, a countdown until he blew up. His hands shook as they turned white, the blood from his palms staining Hanbin’s jacket. “Everyone knows you cheated on her”
Boom.
Heeseung lunged, fist connecting with Hanbin’s nose as they both knocked into the wall. Loud mumbling came from within the crowd as both Heeseung and Hanbin’s members came running over, separating them as Heeseung held the younger man down. “I would never do that to her” His voice shook as he backed up, “she knows that.”
He turned around to look at you only to see you leaving through the back door of the venue, your hair blowing behind you as the fan in the hallway blasted against you.
Heeseung ran behind you, feet thundering as the bass grew louder. His heart raced as he thought he lost sight of you, his hands balled together as he screamed in anger, punching the wall behind him as his heavy breathing filled the hallway.
“Are you done throwing our little bitch fit?” He spun around as your voice sounded from down the hall, his eyes lighting up as your heals clicked as you advanced towards him. Your dark eyes looked straight into his eyes as your body swayed towards him. “Yanno, punching Hanbin was so fucking stupid”
You watched as Heeseung rolled his eyes at the boys name, fists tightening as he recalled the events that just took place. “I’m not done with that fucker, I’m going to kill him” He went to walk back inside the room, stopping at your hand wrapped around his wrist. He looked over his shoulder, deflating as your unimpressed face came into view.
“Heeseung I can touch anyone I want-” “Like hell” Heeseung cut you off, anger shining in his words. You rolled your eyes again before continuing, “You broke up with me and disappeared for two weeks before randomly being sighted with some random girl at some random ass apartment building” He could feel your emotions in your words, heart growing heavy as he swallowed the ball in his throat.
“Baby-“ “Don’t touch me” you recoil from is touch, hand curling against your chest. Heeseung froze as you pulled away, staring at you in horror as he processed what just happened. “Just leave me alone, we’re done”
He watched as you turned around, hesitating a few seconds before walking away with a scoff, arms crossing against your chest as you stomped away.
“She was the realtor of that apartment building. I was going to buy us a place, our own place. Those photos were taken a few months ago, not a week ago. And I only broke up with you because I heard you talking about breaking up with me to Yunjin.”
“What?” You almost shouted in shock, eyebrows furrowing as you watched him walk back over to you in fast steps. This time you let him touch you, his large hand curling around the back of your neck. “You didn’t want me, Baby.” You could see the tears in his eyes, ones he didn’t even attempt to hide.
“What are you talking about, Heeseung? I was never going to break up with you?” Now the both of you were confused, eyes staring at each other for a passing moment. Small tears leaked from the corners of Heeseungs eyes as his lips rolled into his mouth, you couldn’t stop your lips from curling up into a smile at the cute sight before you. You cleared your throat as you tried to hide it but Heeseung caught it the moment it blossomed.
“Why are you smiling? That’s really fucked up you know, I’m sitting here crying like a bitch and you’re here laughing at me” Your smile turned into a full blown laugh as Heeseung pouted at you, kissing his teeth as he rolled his eyes.
“You’re so cute” Heeseung felt butterflies throughout his body as your hand rested against his cheek, his eyes darkening as your touch awoke something that’s been concealed since he left.
“Baby you don’t know what your touch does to me” He whispered as he pressed against the elevator button, a loud beep coming from the it as it opened. “You’re fucking me up, I feel you everywhere” He light pushed you into the elevator, one hand around the back of your neck with the other around your waist.
As soon as the elevators door closed heeseung pushed himself against you, hips rolling into your own as your back arched into him. His lips smashed into yours as his hand pinched at your waist.
His nose hit against your own as his head tilted to the side for more access. His lips sucking your bottom lip into his mouth, teeth gently biting into it.
His tongue rubbed against your bottom lip as he released it from his hold, slipping right between your lips right soon after. A small whimper left his lips as he disconnected with your swollen ones to kiss against your neck.
“You taste so good” He whispered in your ear as he left a soft kiss against your earlobe, “so so good” he bit at the skin under your ear, trailing small bites down your throat to your collarbone.
He pushed his thigh between your legs, both of his hands grabbing your waist to rub you against him. He could feel your heat through his pants, his whole body warming up as he felt your familiar body against his own. “make yourself feel good against me” He begged, eyes looking up at you from below his lashes, “use me.”
“You’re so greedy” Heeseung closed his eyes as he felt you move against his leg, head falling back as your lips connected with his neck. “Only for you, always for you” Heeseung whimpered as your hot kisses grew stronger, your hand tightening in his hair as you pulled his head back further. His breath hitching as you controlled his body how you pleased, using him the way he liked.
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@ LVLYHANNI do not plagiarize, translate, copy or repost
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won4ver · 13 days
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[ =^~^= ] never thought i’d taste as good to anyone but you …
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eires ✦ SIDE BLOG [ @sincerelyrki ] ✧ i’ll repost fics with this account [ what about @yuneeris ? welll.. that’s still my rec account (only posting masterlists, etc) ] ⭑ 05 ☆ @won4ver
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won4ver · 16 days
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SHES OUT OF THE DUNGEON !!!!!
STRAWBERRY COUGH
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SYNOPSIS ⮕ Lee Heeseung never thought the day would come, the day his dealer permanently went out of business. Through word of mouth, Heeseung managed to hear about you, the unknown seller who chooses their clients very selectively. Heeseung had almost lost all hope as his attempts to find you came out fruitless, his desperation only growing. Now insert Park Sunghoon, the man who happened to not only be your top client but also Heeseung’s best friend. or in other words, how far would Lee Heeseung go just to get another taste of his favourite strain, Strawberry Cough? (hint : very far)
PAIRING ⮕ stoner!heeseung x dealer!fem!reader
GENRE + WARNINGS + TROPES ⮕ smau. college au. drugs. he fell first and harder. warnings will be added on each chapter.
STATUS ⮕ UPCOMING! after miniskirt ;)
TAGLIST ⮕ OPEN! send an ask , comment , dm to be added ♡
FEAT ⮕ yeojin [loona]. natty [kiss of life]. k [&team]. nicholas [&team].
A/N ⮕ strawberry lemon corrected i want a lemon lime from a new perspective (sorry).
perm taglist ⮕ @neocockthotology @simjyunnie @addictedtohobi @ahnneyong @grassbutneo
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PROFILES
| dealing with more than drugs
| do heroine(s) not heroin
| the clients
CHAPTERS
| one :
| two :
| three :
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@ SINCERELYRKI all rights reserved. 2024.
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won4ver · 22 days
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✈︎ a cherry for my cherry
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“you’re sweeter than cherry” - sweeter than drugs, april june
pairing : bf!jake x fem!reader
warnings + genre : suggestive. kissing. lowercase intended.
wc : 0.87
a/n : haven’t posted in a while… i finally found time to write (it’s literally passed midnight, only free time i have i swear) anyways i know i literally just released another fic about cherries but jake literally gives cherry? like imo if he were a fruit he’d def be a cherry (maybe sunghoon too? but he gives more like blackberry or coconut) also i’m trying a new layout(ish?) adding the divider after a few sentences rather than before.
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growing up jake was never a fan of cherries.
“is it yummy?” jake cooed at you, his eyes never strayed away from the cherry tucked between your lips, his imagination never ending.
he didn’t wait for your reply before he responded for you, grabbing your chin and forcing your head to nod up and down.
“well, i think that it would only taste so much sweeter from your lips” his fingers gently pressed on your cheeks, forcing your lips open with a quiet pop.
he delicately pulled it out from between your teeth, his breath catching in his chest as he watched the colour smudge across your lips, painting you red with his desires.
he leaned his lower body against yours, his leg parting your legs even further. his chain gently rocked against your chest as his heap swooped down, his lips connecting with yours.
jake groaned into you as the nectar met his taste buds, his eyes squeezing closed tighter as his movements fastened. his lips sucked yours, a messy kiss as he attempted to steal all leftover juice from your mouth.
the second he no longer tasted the fruit on your lips he pulled away, his lips swollen as his cheeks flushed the same colour of the cherry.
“or maybe your skin” he looked at the marks littering your chest, some a little too faded for his liking. a quiet gasp left your lips as the cold sensation spread down your neck, stopping as it reached a familiar spot on your neck. jake’s favourite spot to mark you.
jake’s breathing audibly fastened as the cherry’s colour transferred onto your skin. the colour contrasting, almost highlighting your faded purple spot.
“it’s so pretty” your lower body throbbed at your boyfriend's purr, your need for him only growing as the seconds passed. you felt him everywhere, everywhere except for the place you longed for him the most.
“please” you didn’t know exactly what you were begging for, but jake seemed to understand perfectly.
your body arched into his chest as his lips attached to your neck, the cherry held between two of his fingers as his lips sucked a third mark.
a soft sigh of approval left his lips, the vibrations spreading across your body. “i was right” he trailed off, lifting the cherry back onto your skin, dragging it to the right.
“you taste-“ his tongue followed the red trail, lips ghosting across your skin until he reached the next fading spot, “-so good”
a soft moan left your lips as jake gently nipped at the spot he just finished remarking, his lips pulling into a mischievous grin at your addicting reaction.
jake made a whole show of slightly pulling away, removing his lower body from yours. his eyes meet yours as he moves to straddle you, his knees pressing against your hips as he lowers himself onto the top of your thighs.
He maintained eye contact as he raised the cherry near his face, barely opening his mouth as he pressed the cherry against his lips. both your arousal and confusion grew as jake just rested the bitten part of the cherry against his lips, making no move to eat it.
the juice began dripping down his bottom lip, red streaks staining his skin as it travelled down at a constant slow speed. jake still did nothing but sit there, the cherry against his lips as he stared down at you with an unfamiliar look.
your jaw dropped as he finally reacted, his tongue gently poking out to lick a small part of it, his nose scrunching up in disdain.
he pulled the fruit away in disgust, his eyes teasingly squinting at you. “it doesn’t taste good unless it comes from you” he broke your staring contest as he looked down at your buttoned lace blouse, head slightly tilting to the side as he pretended to think.
“and i'd hate to ruin such a pretty shirt” he fake pouted at you, acting as if he’s disappointed. “i guess i’ll just have to remove it”
he placed the stem between his teeth, using one hand to undo the buttons, and the other to push your hair out of your face.
you went to aid jake with removing your blouse but froze on the spot the moment a tsk left his mouth. he only had to shake his head once before you relaxed your body, head resting against his pillow as you allowed him to unclothe you.
your shift was soon discarded on the ground, a garment that will soon be used as a reminder of what jake did to you.
“that’s better, isn’t it?” a sly smirk kissed his lips as the cherry returned to his hands, hovering over your neck hii la
for a moment before he changed its route.
“now i can touch you anywhere” you nearly flinched as the fruit touched your navel, a new blushed path beginning.
“a cherry for my cherry” his hot breath blew against your sensitive skin, goosebumps sprouting along your arms. “only mine”
your head flew back as his lips once again pressed against you. only this time, he knew exactly where this next path would lead.
but now, he’s never loved them more.
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won4ver · 27 days
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ive just got that ultimate rizz
are you jungwon? because you won my heart 💗
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won4ver · 28 days
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will u be the won 4 me
MY JAW DROPPED OMFG?? got me giggling n blushing rn 🤭🤭 (yes)
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won4ver · 28 days
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uhh, so I just finished reading "the perfect picture" pic 'cause I love bet angst aus and I'm trying to cry rn, but I can't find your other aus that's angst so could you help me
☽ waxing cresecent moon anon
hihiii, sorry for the late reply!! so i have a few angst fics but most of them aren’t ??that?? angsty?? like cry worthy idk 😭😭 but a my angst fics are : maladaptive daydreamer, our forever is done, season of lilies, red camera, forelsket, words left unsaid, it was a mistake + mango perfume, and words left unsaid :) they’re all linked in my masterlist (it’s in my nav, linked under 18)
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won4ver · 1 month
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NAUR the jake angst fic got me feeling so sad 😭😭 it was so well written i'm gonna go cry
THANK UU😭😭😭😭 ily👰‍♀️
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won4ver · 1 month
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the jake angst fic was too good. i could’ve read 22k words or 2k words. absolutely slayed
THANK YOU, YOURE TOO NICE😭😭😭 i didn’t really like it so this makes me feel better about it 💗
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won4ver · 1 month
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OHMYGOD THANK U SM💗💗💗 this means everything to me, thank you thank you thank you💗💗💗💗
short almost drabble like fic where jake dated you because of a bet (you find out). bet fics are my guilty pleasure.
but i’m thinking it’s more of just your reaction? like it shows the emotions you go through after finding out
if you decide to write it, thank you🤭
✈︎ the perfect picture
pairing : bf!jake x fem!reader
warnings + genre : angst. crying.
wc : 1.1k
a/n : I LOVE BET FICS SM BCUZ THEY HURT SO GOOD OMFG + plsss lmk how i did!
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Jake’s love painted the perfect picture, the canvas splaying out in a precise manner. The midnight giggles and morning delicacies were nothing more than a distraction, a part Jake played a little too well.
You were blindsided by everything else around you, unable to escape your 2d world. The walls of your heart were crafted by the lies that Jake had sewn into your skin since early on, the needle beginning its stitch the second his eyes met yours.
The gallons of paint were now splattered across the sky, Jake's canvas cracking as the black seeped in through the sections where he forgot to blend.
The audio recording sounded out across your stale room, all air stuck in your lungs as you held your breath, heartbeat behind your eyes as the tears welled.
“LN YN? It’s like you're asking for me to lose before I even begin.” The voice so clearly belonged to your boyfriend, his recognizable shocked tone sounding extra sharp.
“So you’re giving up? It’s not my fault they’ve never noticed you before.” Park Sunghoon, the man who always supported that boyish smile, and your boyfriend's best friend.
“I think they’re a good choice, allows more room for fun” Park Jongseong, the captain of the rugby team, again, your boyfriend's best friend.
“What do I get if I win?”
“Easy. You get this” Even if you couldn’t physically see this scene, you knew very well what Park Sunghoon was shaking in his hands. The bills slapping together as he shook them.
“Deal, prepare to hand it over.” The sound of their hands meeting was your tipping point, vision blurring as the tears fell.
The constricted air in your lungs shot out with your first exhale, chest burning as the weight of your boyfriend's betrayal lay heavy.
The next minutes were a blur of tears and blinding lights, your packed bags landing beside your feet as you hurriedly pulled on your shoes. Your phone buzzing to life in your pocket, messages coming in back to back.
You tried ignoring it, the thought of seeing your boyfriend's contact on your screen creating an overwhelming nauseous feeling.
It wasn’t until you heard a specific ringtone that you decided to fish your phone from your pocket, the loud voice of Sunghoon ringing too loudly across Jake’s apartment.
After hanging out with Jake’s friends a few times you managed to get extremely close to them, Sunghoon in specific. It was easy to get along with him, easy to drown within his sweet aura.
After class one day you accidentally stumbled into him, his attempts to hide his swollen eye coming up unsuccessful. You remembered that day, the day you found out about his fights.
It was as if that evening opened a door to your relationship, Sunghoon attaching himself to your hip.
One day all the boys decided to prank you, changing your ringtones to ones personalized by them. Sunghoon’s voice through his own ringtone has never felt so daunting, you’ve never hated him more.
Your eyes lazily read across his newest message, ignoring the other twenty-seven he’d sent within the last two minutes.
hoon
I’m so sorry, I promise we called off the bet after meeting you please don’t do anything you’ll regret. Jake’s on his way back, please hear him out
Without another thought you pressed his notification, the delivered alert changing to seen straight away. It seemed that Sunghoon was already typing again, bubbles popping up right away.
You ignored him once again, leaving his chat to open Jake’s. There was only one message from him, one sent by him hours ago, right after he left to Jay’s house.
“Never talk to me again” you whispered as your fingers pressed each letter, shakily pressing each letter before pressing send. As soon as the message went through you tossed your phone onto the table beside Jake’s door.
Of course, in hindsight, it was foolish to get rid of your phone, but there’s no way you could continue using it knowing all the memories stored in it.
What you didn’t know, was that when you threw it you somehow opened your emails, the email that contained the audio recording.
And so you left, leaving nothing but your phone. You ignored the looks in the lobby, your favourite neighbours giving you worried looks as they saw your state.
You got into the car, carelessly throwing your bags into the backseat. You reversed out of the spot, leaving Jake without another thought.
Jake could feel the dread in his chest as he entered the lobby, the same neighbours that saw you leave in a haste not yet seeing him and they whispered amongst themselves.
“Is yn alright? She just left in a hurry, she was crying pretty bad” Jake didn’t register their words until he reached his apartment, his hands on his knees as he caught his breath.
He had figured he’d get up faster if he ran up the stairs, the elevator always took ages to get down to the lobby.
He slammed open his door, tears falling once again as he noticed that all your belongings were gone. The only sound in his apartment was his own breathing, well that’s what he thought until he saw your discarded phone.
He walked towards it, jelly knees barely holding him up as he bent down to grab your phone. He felt acid rise up his throat, eyes widening as he heard the audio coming from your phone.
He knew you had found out the moment Sunghoon looked up at Jake with glassy eyes, shaking his head as he tried to get the words out. He didn’t waste a second before running out, ignoring his friends calling for him as the apartment door slammed behind him.
He was too late, he missed you by mere seconds. He didn’t have the chance to talk to you, to explain himself. This wasn’t how he wanted you to find out, he was planning countless ways that he would tell you.
That bet was Jake Sim’s biggest regret, but it wasn’t a mistake. Even if he was given the chance to go back and stop himself from accepting the bet, he would never do it. The time he spent with you was his favourite, you became his favourite person.
He didn’t know where he would go from here, but all he knew was that he needed to get to your apartment as soon as possible. And so he ran back down all flights of stairs, racing to his car as he sped towards you.
He didn’t know if you’d ever forgive him, but he needed to try. He loved you more than anything, even if it wasn’t genuine at first.
Jake Sim loved you, but after today you didn’t know if you believed that. If he loved you he wouldn’t have done this to you.
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won4ver · 1 month
Note
short almost drabble like fic where jake dated you because of a bet (you find out). bet fics are my guilty pleasure.
but i’m thinking it’s more of just your reaction? like it shows the emotions you go through after finding out
if you decide to write it, thank you🤭
✈︎ the perfect picture
pairing : bf!jake x fem!reader
warnings + genre : angst. crying.
wc : 1.1k
a/n : I LOVE BET FICS SM BCUZ THEY HURT SO GOOD OMFG + plsss lmk how i did!
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Jake’s love painted the perfect picture, the canvas splaying out in a precise manner. The midnight giggles and morning delicacies were nothing more than a distraction, a part Jake played a little too well.
You were blindsided by everything else around you, unable to escape your 2d world. The walls of your heart were crafted by the lies that Jake had sewn into your skin since early on, the needle beginning its stitch the second his eyes met yours.
The gallons of paint were now splattered across the sky, Jake's canvas cracking as the black seeped in through the sections where he forgot to blend.
The audio recording sounded out across your stale room, all air stuck in your lungs as you held your breath, heartbeat behind your eyes as the tears welled.
“LN YN? It’s like you're asking for me to lose before I even begin.” The voice so clearly belonged to your boyfriend, his recognizable shocked tone sounding extra sharp.
“So you’re giving up? It’s not my fault they’ve never noticed you before.” Park Sunghoon, the man who always supported that boyish smile, and your boyfriend's best friend.
“I think they’re a good choice, allows more room for fun” Park Jongseong, the captain of the rugby team, again, your boyfriend's best friend.
“What do I get if I win?”
“Easy. You get this” Even if you couldn’t physically see this scene, you knew very well what Park Sunghoon was shaking in his hands. The bills slapping together as he shook them.
“Deal, prepare to hand it over.” The sound of their hands meeting was your tipping point, vision blurring as the tears fell.
The constricted air in your lungs shot out with your first exhale, chest burning as the weight of your boyfriend's betrayal lay heavy.
The next minutes were a blur of tears and blinding lights, your packed bags landing beside your feet as you hurriedly pulled on your shoes. Your phone buzzing to life in your pocket, messages coming in back to back.
You tried ignoring it, the thought of seeing your boyfriend's contact on your screen creating an overwhelming nauseous feeling.
It wasn’t until you heard a specific ringtone that you decided to fish your phone from your pocket, the loud voice of Sunghoon ringing too loudly across Jake’s apartment.
After hanging out with Jake’s friends a few times you managed to get extremely close to them, Sunghoon in specific. It was easy to get along with him, easy to drown within his sweet aura.
After class one day you accidentally stumbled into him, his attempts to hide his swollen eye coming up unsuccessful. You remembered that day, the day you found out about his fights.
It was as if that evening opened a door to your relationship, Sunghoon attaching himself to your hip.
One day all the boys decided to prank you, changing your ringtones to ones personalized by them. Sunghoon’s voice through his own ringtone has never felt so daunting, you’ve never hated him more.
Your eyes lazily read across his newest message, ignoring the other twenty-seven he’d sent within the last two minutes.
hoon
I’m so sorry, I promise we called off the bet after meeting you please don’t do anything you’ll regret. Jake’s on his way back, please hear him out
Without another thought you pressed his notification, the delivered alert changing to seen straight away. It seemed that Sunghoon was already typing again, bubbles popping up right away.
You ignored him once again, leaving his chat to open Jake’s. There was only one message from him, one sent by him hours ago, right after he left to Jay’s house.
“Never talk to me again” you whispered as your fingers pressed each letter, shakily pressing each letter before pressing send. As soon as the message went through you tossed your phone onto the table beside Jake’s door.
Of course, in hindsight, it was foolish to get rid of your phone, but there’s no way you could continue using it knowing all the memories stored in it.
What you didn’t know, was that when you threw it you somehow opened your emails, the email that contained the audio recording.
And so you left, leaving nothing but your phone. You ignored the looks in the lobby, your favourite neighbours giving you worried looks as they saw your state.
You got into the car, carelessly throwing your bags into the backseat. You reversed out of the spot, leaving Jake without another thought.
Jake could feel the dread in his chest as he entered the lobby, the same neighbours that saw you leave in a haste not yet seeing him and they whispered amongst themselves.
“Is yn alright? She just left in a hurry, she was crying pretty bad” Jake didn’t register their words until he reached his apartment, his hands on his knees as he caught his breath.
He had figured he’d get up faster if he ran up the stairs, the elevator always took ages to get down to the lobby.
He slammed open his door, tears falling once again as he noticed that all your belongings were gone. The only sound in his apartment was his own breathing, well that’s what he thought until he saw your discarded phone.
He walked towards it, jelly knees barely holding him up as he bent down to grab your phone. He felt acid rise up his throat, eyes widening as he heard the audio coming from your phone.
He knew you had found out the moment Sunghoon looked up at Jake with glassy eyes, shaking his head as he tried to get the words out. He didn’t waste a second before running out, ignoring his friends calling for him as the apartment door slammed behind him.
He was too late, he missed you by mere seconds. He didn’t have the chance to talk to you, to explain himself. This wasn’t how he wanted you to find out, he was planning countless ways that he would tell you.
That bet was Jake Sim’s biggest regret, but it wasn’t a mistake. Even if he was given the chance to go back and stop himself from accepting the bet, he would never do it. The time he spent with you was his favourite, you became his favourite person.
He didn’t know where he would go from here, but all he knew was that he needed to get to your apartment as soon as possible. And so he ran back down all flights of stairs, racing to his car as he sped towards you.
He didn’t know if you’d ever forgive him, but he needed to try. He loved you more than anything, even if it wasn’t genuine at first.
Jake Sim loved you, but after today you didn’t know if you believed that. If he loved you he wouldn’t have done this to you.
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won4ver · 1 month
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I kinda like or there this magnet/pull with exploring stuffs that can provoke pain. [It has a trigger warning so I kinda had an idea what I was diving into] This is a little bit oversharing[sorry to even bring this in your inbox]. But I lost a loved one 14 years ago, I'm fine now but from time to time I miss the person and cry cause I feel guilty that i'm growing and living life. Somehow starting to forget the person. Its painful but also comforting to read something from the perspective of the grieving with an honest confession of grief. Death is one grim concept or idea but it hits different when we feel the loss ourselves. We usually outgrow the pain, thou it does not go away permanently. I never got to properly mourn this pain so maybe thats why it always feel fresh, but I know that our love ones would love for us to go on and live our lives whenever were ready. You've written it beautifully. There are a lot of good writters, but I simply think not all can convey emotion or make people feel. Your writting has brought me in a dimension as if I was the character in your work and I think thats incredible of you. I hope that you are showered with all the positive things in the world, to always have the heart for writting as your talent is beautiful. Thank you for writting this and for writting. [I'm talking about words left unsaid btw. Jake one was my favorite out of all.]
You dont have to respond to this. [I feel embarassed, but really want to compliment you. Thats all 💕💕💕
hi!! thank you so much for feeling comfortable enough to share this with me💗
it’s hard to live without someone who you weren’t prepared to lose yet, the guilt following you as you were able to get older knowing that they’d remain the same age forever. and i agree, being able to let go, to countinue living, is something that anyone would’ve wished for. just because their life ended, doesn’t mean yours did.
the strength of yourself and everyone who goes through this pain is super admirable, truly.
it’s inevitable to not miss someone whenever you randomly see something that reminds you of them, or when you think about the opportunities you were graced with. but even just thinking about them keeps their memory alive, they’re going through this with you.
but even if you start forgetting their voice, their touch, anything, it doesn’t mean that you’re losing them all over again. they’ll always be kept alive in everyone’s memories, even if the they become stored behind the countless others you’d make in your life.
mourning comes in so many ways, there’s no textbook way that depreciates how we should react/ get over the loss of someone close to us. everyone’s body is unique, reacting and dealing with the pain for different durations of time and in different ways.
growing up my dad always told me about what he thinks happens to use when we die, where we would go. he stares longingly towards any forest in our path, any weed that blooms in our garden. he tells us about how we’re made up of energy, energy that can never be destroyed. he believes that while our soul goes to the afterlife, our energy vibrates with the one of nature. he told me that when he dies, don’t look for him because he’d be everywhere. he’d be in the air that we breathe, in the water that we drink, in the grass that returns every spring.
even if i’d never be ready to let him go, i find comfort in knowing that when the time came, he’d finally reunite with the flowers that wait for him. even if i forgot his voice, id hear him during the windy nights, id see him in the fallen leaves as the seasons change once again.
i’m not sure if what i’m saying is even comforting anyone, i’m not the best at expressing my genuine thoughts. but i hope when you read this, it can bring you some sort of relief.
thank you so much for your kind words, it makes me feel so special knowing you’d come here and shared them with me. i hope to get better at writing in the future, but right now your words make me feel as if i’m going through the right track.
you’re so inspiring, i hope you also have everything good come to you. you deserve all the happiness and love in the world :)
thank you again for trusting me enough to tell me this, my page will always be a safe space to say whatever you’d like.
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won4ver · 1 month
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told myself that i was going to write 2day but then i watched my demon for the entire day (literally watched 10 episodes 😭😭)
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won4ver · 1 month
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just found out delicating isn’t a word, nights ruined
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won4ver · 1 month
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WTH LIL RI 😕
WAIT WHO’S LIL RI?? literally thought that said “with lil ri” but then i saw it said wth😭😭
LIL RI IS SUCH A CUTE NICKNAME THO, its giving rapper
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