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sleebyfrogs · 8 months

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Okay so just imagine like. You’re just a little guy. You have no parents and your grandfather who raised you has always disparaged and disapproved of the very fact that you exist, for reasons utterly beyond your control. People enjoy your presence because you’re polite and charming the same way they enjoy flowers in spring, which is to say in passing and ultimately without any real connection.

And then you meet this guy who is just like. obsessed with you. He always wants to be around you and he derives true joy from it without you having to say anything funny or clever or lie for politeness’ sake. He creates art that he loves of you and because of you. Indirectly, you are suddenly able to put joy and beauty into the world, anything into the world, because you inspire him. You never imagined you would leave any kind of footprint the way things were before, because nothing you had was meaningful or lasting. And he flatters you dreadfully, he tells you how incredibly beautiful you are, and whether you realise it or not, you can feel that at least part of this value that he has found in you, that he has given you, comes from that beauty.

And then one day you meet his friend, who is older than you and cooler than you and a lord, and so witty and eloquent that you struggle just trying to keep track of whatever the fuck he’s talking about (and he always sounds like he knows everything about it), and he’s been this guy’s friend much longer than you have, and he also compliments you on your beauty and so seemingly that is the only quality of any worth that you possess, right? And then he waxes on and on about how it’s the only thing worth having and explains that what you have is actually incredibly valuable and fragile and precious, and that you are inevitably going to lose it and there’s nothing you can do. And also he says all this while you’re having your gay awakening because he’s sweet-talking you in a way you’ve never experienced and it’s uhhhhh it’s something. So then while you’re having a complete existential crisis over this your mutual friend calls you over to show you the most exquisite painting you’ve ever seen in your life and it’s of you. You didn’t know you could be so beautiful to anyone, you didn’t know he could create anything so beautiful, you didn’t know beauty on this level could even be captured in art. And that’s how he sees you, continually, without you having to make any effort to please him? Just to be yourself is enough to have inspired this incredible thing? You might cry. And then you realise he created it here and now and of you because on this particular day of June, you are twenty years old, and young, and pretty, and once you age out of that, you will lose the one thing anyone has ever valued in you, and surely also his interest, and you will be alone again, and worthy of nothing and no one. And because you’re also twenty years old and privileged and inexperienced you’ve never learned any capacity for nuanced thoughts and say things that are incredibly rash and stupid and regrettable.

So I’m not saying Dorian did nothing wrong but I am saying in his position I’d definitely have been a vain and terrified idiot too

#The Picture of Dorian Gray #LISTEN. My other point is that yes he should have known better but he was never given the chance to learn how to make those better decisions #The world and people that should have prepared him to be a wiser adult navigating a more complex world failed and neglected him #So in that position with the life he’d had behind him he could *never* have made a different choice even though his past was full of so many #opportunities for him to learn that if only anyone had actually given it the time of day to teach him #Yes Dorian was selfish and cruel and stupid and that is his fault #But it was also wrong of the people in his life not to have shown and taught him how to be anything else #And that’s really what makes him a very tragic character to me #Because all these things that he couldn’t control came together by sheer chance and made him an offer he had no means to refuse #and no idea he was even agreeing to #and it set him up perfectly to ruin his entire life and the lives of so many around him #Doriginal #Lord that was. an Essay and now it’s 4am girl help #Yes it was still a fight he could have won and he lost anyway.#but I do think it’s more than a little unfair that no one who was meant to ever gave him a sword.

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totentnz · 2 months

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whoever invented squeeze tubes should be flayed like im sure there is a reason for them beyond "big skincare wants you to throw away money" but i dont care!!! if you sell your product in a fucking tube im coming for you

#sammy says shit #and yes i know that because of some ingrediences you have to package things a certain way #and if you sell it in a tub you have to put your fingers inside it every time and supposedly thats nasty #<- is running out of moisturizer but refuses to buy new one because they are convinced there is still some left in the tube #and i cant squeeze it properly bc of the material its made of #i ALSO know there are aids for helping with that shit but at this point im spitefuö #spiteful*

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happi-tree · 1 year

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is it midnight? yes. but i had to get this concept out there before it ate me alive. the swiftlis are rotting my brain fr!!!

#the way i actually looked at the 5e handbook for this #ANYWAY i've been annoying nyx about this literally all day today and this simply refuses to leave my brain!!! they're so!!!#listen to me LISTEN to me. link deserves the ability to kiss the ouchies away okay #link checking on taylor after a battle and giving him a little smooch to smooth over his injuries...#giving him kisses to help ease some of his chronic pains... even rlly mundane things like headaches... the possibilities are endless!#i'm just. i think that growing up link is a really touchy-feely kid and he loves doting on his friends and giving them lots of hugs #but the kisses i think he reserves just for taylor <3 #i have the first part of this written already i'm very unwell abt them #also. yes paper rings is a swiftli song. to me 💗💗💗#dndads #swiftli #happi scribbles

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kangals · 1 year

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One step forward, one step back 😩 he did really well yesterday, ate two full meals and seemed a bit perkier, then today refuses absolutely everything and is back to being dull and depressed again. he’s so dramatic about certain things and stoic about others, it’s hard to tell where the actual source of the problem is.

#the fact that he’s refusing food despite being on the appetite stimulant is concerning me #and yes I have tried multiple food suggestions ppl offered on my earlier post and they’ve all been soundly rejected #he’s also definitely picking up on my frustration/stress which doesn’t help #time to Act Super Casual while bothering every dr I can find

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widevibratobitch · 9 months

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i hate them with a passion

#this may turn into one of my long ass posts with hundreds of screenshots of quotes from the books #but i dont have the energy for that just now #anyway. this moment makes me wanna throw shit at the walls. their relationship is my favourite thing from the very beginning #but dumas went really went out of his way to make it even more insane in the last book #and dont hit me with a 'aww they have such a big/little brother energy its so cute uwu' please im begging you stop saying that #nothing irks me more than hearing their relationship described as something that innocent. its so much more complex and intense come on #there is pure visceral hate there. jealousy. bile. cruelty. some fucked up form of codependency even? maybe? from d'artagnan's side?#there's nothing more horrible and cruel than the fact that THEY are the only two left alive in the end (not for long but yknow)#they would NEVER be friends if not for athos (and they would never hate each other so much if not for him too)#they hate each other so so much. but remember that d'artagnan starts out being absolutely bedazzled by aramis and looking up to him #his first impression of aramis is just. hearteyes and 'wow i wish that were me'. he doesnt do that even with athos at first.#he grows to adore athos yes but upon first meeting him he doesnt think much of him. unlike with aramis.#and then it changes instantly. does a 180° flip when aramis is a bitch to him.#and it stays that way for the entirety of the trilogy. until this moment. this one short moment when d'artagnan #who. mind you. is not innocent himself and was also manipulating the hell out of porthos and talking shit about aramis behind his back.#but he makes that step. he reaches out. 'i fucking hate you let me help you you dumb evil cunt' and aramis says 'no <3'#you know i have this thing where i am OBSESSED with finding the one moment where a character condemns themselves for good.#the one moment when they figuratively sign the contract for their perdition. that up to that moment they could still be saved somehow.#for rodrigo it is when he tries to kill eboli (in the play). for don giovanni it is when he refuses elvira's plea to change #(NOT when he accepts il commendatore's invite mind you)#and i feel like THIS is that moment for aramis.#the fact that it comes from d'artagnan is so just so fucking agsjssgsgsh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and of course he says no.#there is no version of this where he lets himself be helped. he has to say no he will always say no.#but boy oh boy is this making me bang my head against the wall.#the three musketeers #les trois mousquetaires #vicomte de bragelonne #alexandre dumas

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iridescentoracle · 10 months

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i totally get why LfW isn’t covering the novels (aside from that early bit of Study in Scarlet) but it does kill me a little that we didn’t do Hound at some point because like. man.

'Well, I am glad from my heart that you are here, for indeed the responsibility and the mystery were both becoming too much for my nerves. But how in the name of wonder did you come here, and what have you been doing? I thought that you were in Baker Street working out that case of blackmailing.'

'That was what I wished you to think.'

'Then you use me, and yet do not trust me!' I cried, with some bitterness. 'I think that I have deserved better at your hands, Holmes.'

'My dear fellow, you have been invaluable to me in this as in many other cases, and I beg that you will forgive me if I have seemed to play a trick upon you. In truth, it was partly for your own sake that I did it, and it was my appreciation of the danger which you ran which led me to come down and examine the matter for myself. […] As it is, I have been able to get about as I could not possibly have done had I been living at the Hall, and I remain an unknown factor in the business, ready to throw in all my weight at a critical moment.'

'But why keep me in the dark?'

'For you to know could not have helped us, and might possibly have led to my discovery. You would have wished to tell me something, or in your kindness you would have brought me out some comfort or other, and so an unnecessary risk would be run. […]

I was still rather raw over the deception which had been practised upon me, but the warmth of Holmes's praise drove my anger from my mind. I felt also in my heart that he was right in what he said, and that it was really best for our purpose that I should not have known that he was upon the moor.

'That's better,' said he, seeing the shadow rise from my face.

like. man. passages to have been published within a year or two of “Empty House,” huh

#sherlock holmes #HOUN #EMPT #it didn't really strike me the first god-knows-how-many times i read EMPT (or HOUN for that matter)#but at some point i was rereading the whole canon but misplaced Hound and so skipped right to the Return #and the reveal seemed so weirdly understated and quickly glossed over to the point it felt like half the conversation was missing?#and then my copy of Hound turned up again and i got to the reveal *there* and just had a moment of oh.#oh‚ *there* it is #that's why we don't get more about the deception or anything about watson feeling hurt or angry let alone holmes' explanation #or the two of them talking things out and all of it being okay again #because we don't need it in the Empty House because we already got that conversation #more or less #in Hound #also [slams fist on table] HOLMES SPENDS THIS ENTIRE CONVERSATION PRAISING AND THANKING WATSON #AND CALLING HIM INVALUABLE AND SAYING HE COULDN'T HAVE DONE IT WITHOUT WATSON'S HELP DAMMIT #he refuses to stop emphasizing how important watson has been to the case until watson smiles!!!#and even then he brings it up again later in the conversation more than once!!!#YES i am still holding a grudge against The Hound of the Baskervilles (1939) dir. Sidney Lanfield NO i will not let this go

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tennessoui · 2 years

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I feel like this is a big ask, but 1. welcome back! 2. can you ever see KUWSK going angsty? Not permanently or anything, but what would a KUWSK obikin disagreement look like?

yes thank you for welcoming me back a month and a half ago i'm a bit trash to be so late on this but!! here is about 2k of a more serious fight between anakin and obi-wan.

(2k)

“You’re talking to your ex,” Anakin says. It’s the tone of voice he uses on work calls when he’s absolutely furious but trying to remain professional. Obi-Wan has never heard it directed at him before. He almost doesn’t recognize it.

“Casually,” he stresses. “We’re…casually speaking.”

“Casually,” Anakin echoes in that same voice. Obi-Wan is starting to think he’s done something incredibly wrong.

“She messaged me,” he stresses, feeling as if this is an important fact. “I didn’t reach out to her.”

“But you reached back!” Anakin says loudly, putting the spoon on its rest a touch too forcefully. “And then you didn’t even tell me!”

“I thought it was a non-issue!” Obi-Wan protests. “I don’t tell you when I talk to the woman at the supermarket checkout line!”

“Keep Francesca out of this,” Anakin cuts through the air with the side of his hand as he spins around to open their spice cabinet. “You know full well that’s different.”

“She flirts with me at the store, and you’re fine with it!” Obi-Wan quite completely feels like tearing out his hair. He can’t believe they’re having this conversation. He can’t believe his own fortune, that he’d pulled up a picture mid-playful argument with Anakin over what the twins had dressed as for Halloween when they were five, and he’d shown it to his partner at the exact moment that Satine ex-Kenobi had texted him, replying to something he'd sent a week ago.

That had pretty much ended the playful part of their argument.

“Yeah, and it’s not the fucking same, Obi-Wan,” Anakin responds, shaking a bit of salt aggressively into the stew. “You were never fucking married to fucking Francesca.”

“Anakin—”

“And by the way,” Anakin snaps, trading the salt for cayenne pepper and seasoning it liberally. “Implying that your ex-wife is also flirting with you over texts you did not tell me about is not the best strategy, Professor.”

The worst part is that he’s not even looking at him anymore, scowling instead into the contents of the heavy pot.

“Anakin,” Obi-Wan tries, because he’s not listening, he’s just reacting. Of course Obi-Wan knows Francesca and Satine aren’t really the same thing, but they mean the same thing to him. One slips him free red bell peppers sometimes by ringing them up as green ones with a wink and a quirk of her lips. The other is his ex-wife.

But neither of them is Anakin, and so they mean the same thing to him. He doesn’t love them. He can’t even pay them the slightest modicum of his attention, because he’s too wrapped up in and around and going crazy over this man who’s petty enough to have absolutely just ruined Obi-Wan’s dinner on purpose by adding too much spice to the stew Obi-Wan had requested.

“Anakin, I think we need to take a step back from this,” he finally gets out when his partner is distracted by opening and closing the cabinet doors, ostensibly looking for the bowls even though he’d been the one to reorganize the dishes in the first place, years ago, and he’s never not known where something is.

“I think I’m going to sleep in my room tonight,” Anakin replies in an icy voice. “I think you might be right.”

“What? Darling, no—Anakin, love, it’s—casual cannot even come close to describing the texts, you can read them if you want, there’s nothing there—“

“Daddy? Obi?” Luke asks from the kitchen doorway. He’s peering around it, little face looking horrified. Obi-Wan freezes. How loud had they been? Luke and Leia are seven now, they remember these things, they have questions—“Is dinner ready? Obi?”

Leia’s face joins the same pale ghost of her brother’s, and Obi-Wan feels awful. Absolutely terrible, but the sort of terrible he doesn’t know what to do with. The twins heard them arguing, they were practically shouting at each other, Anakin is planning to sleep in a different room, Anakin didn’t even call it a guest room, he called it his room even though they’ve been together for—for a year and a bit now—and isn’t that devastating? My room, Anakin had said. Does he not understand everything Obi-Wan owns is his as well? Does he…does he not want it?

“Almost,” Anakin replies. He sounds so forcefully happy that it’s manic. It comes across much too fake, and Obi-Wan can feel the way Luke immediately distrusts the word, the expression. “I just realized I forgot something at the store though! We need bread! We can’t have the stew without bread.”

Anakin nods once to himself as he says this, shooting Obi-Wan a very quick glance before his eyes snag on the phone on the counter between them and he looks away as if incredibly pained, hands ghosting down to the pockets of his jeans to check for his keys.

Obi-Wan thinks it would really actually kill a part of him to watch Anakin drive away on his bike right now. Not to mention the twins.

Oh, the twins.

This had been why they were so hesitant in the first place, to bite the bullet, to kiss and mean it and remember it and lean in again. Their relationship affects the twins, and as much as Obi-Wan loves Anakin, he’d been so worried about even accidentally causing the kids distress.

He thinks seeing their father leave when they can tell something is wrong would be devastating.

“I’ll go,” Obi-Wan says, putting a hand flat on the counter, pocketing the phone, and fighting the urge to glare at Anakin because the other man should know—should think—but this Anakin is almost a stranger to him, all clenched jaw and shaking hands and it’s just a text—it sort of makes him mad as well, angry that it hurts so much, that Anakin doesn’t trust him. They’ve known each other going on three years, their entire lives were intertwined almost immediately. “Give me the keys.”

“Yeah, right,” Anakin scoffs, shoulders tense and unyielding. “To the bike?”

“No, dumb—” he cuts himself off because he’s too old to be namecalling, especially around little ears. “The keys to the car are behind you. On their hook. Can you hand them to me?” He doesn’t think he should get within a few feet of Anakin right now. Not for fear of violence–either from him or from his partner—but because it just—it doesn’t seem like a good idea. Not when they need bread.

“Should I leave my phone?” He can’t help but ask acidly.

“I don’t know,” Anakin shoots back with deadly accuracy, slinging the keys across the countertop hard enough that they spin out of control and Obi-Wan has to stoop to catch them “Should you?”

Obi-Wan turns and gets to the mouth of the kitchen without another word. He debates his actions, his emotions, for a second’s pause before he puts his phone on the countertop and sweeps out into the entryway and then just as quickly out of the house all together.

He can’t go far. The Skywalkers have made him incapable of it. He’ll go to the store. He’ll get Anakin his fucking bread, which really means he’ll give Anakin space to think, and he’ll take his own space to think, and then he’ll come back because it’s Anakin, it’s Anakin and it’s his family, and he thinks this is the stupidest fight in the entire goddamn world because doesn’t Anakin know how much he can’t love anyone else? Doesn’t he know that if Satine were to turn up on his doorstep tomorrow and ask for him to unsign the divorce papers, he wouldn’t even consider it?

Doesn’t he know—

“Obi?” Leia’s voice says at the same time there’s a hesitant tug on the edge of his shirt. He turns around and looks down at the girl. “Where are you going, Obi?”

“Your father wants bread for dinner,” he tells her. “So I’m going out to get bread. For dinner.”

“Oh,” Leia bites her lip before looking back behind her at the open door of the house. “Luke wants to know if you’re gonna come back, Obi.”

Since she turned seven, Leia has had trouble admitting when she wants to know something. She finds it so much easier to pretend she’s her brother’s spokesperson. “Daddy, Luke wants to know if the dog dies in the movie.” “Obi, Luke wants to know if we have to go to the barbecue, only cause Johnny is going to be there, and Luke really doesn’t like him.”

“Leia love,” Obi-Wan crouches down to look at her completely. “Of course I’m coming back. We need bread, darling.”

“I don’t want bread,” she snaps, sounding suddenly so very much like her father. “I want you.”

“Leia,” Obi-Wan pauses, smoothing his hand over the top of her hair carefully. He needs to soothe her, because he and Anakin had been so out of line earlier, fighting where the children could hear and now look what it’s done to them.

“Obi,” Luke trots out of the house before he can figure out what to say to her. “Obi, you should take this,” he holds something up and presses it into unresisting hands. “If daddy needs to keep your phone, you can have mine. Just in case you wanna talk to us while you’re gone.”

It’s the plastic, bulky flip phone that’d come in a kit of kid’s toys a Christmas ago. Smiley faces instead of buttons, but it made sounds when you hit it. Luke had been obsessed with it from the beginning.

Obi-Wan looks down at the phone and feels the very absurd urge to cry. “Loves,” he whispers, pulling Leia into his side. “Oh—”

He remembers thinking once when he’d just been given the Skywalkers, that first time he’d been asked to sit beside Luke’s bed until he fell asleep, that for children, love was about staying.

How can he possibly leave them now? When he loves them so much as well? When his love never grew out of that child’s wish for someone to stroke his hair as he dozed?

“Oh, alright, Luke, Leia,” he says, standing with only a bit of a wince because he’s getting so very old and Leia has thrown her arms around his neck unexpectedly so he rises with the weight of a child attached to him. “If your daddy wants bread, then let’s get him bread.”

“Road trip?” Leia asks with excitement.

“Better,” Obi-Wan promises, letting Luke grab onto his hand. “Science experiment.”

#asks #kuwsk #what follows is the most aggressive and disastrous breadmaking experiment in the world #like the twins are all eager to help mostly to spend time with obi-wan and make sure he doesen't try to leave or something #but then they get bored #because both daddy and obi aren't doing anything more than politely making conversation #as obi makes a huge mess of the kitchen and anakin refuses to help #meanwhile the adults have entered all out warfare #obi-wan asks anakin where he keeps the flour #and anakin is like it's probably the same place it was when satine lived here in this house with you #(it's not)#(also i know canon kuwsk on tumblr had them married after a few months of being romantically involved)#(but im retconning tht because it's funnier and more dramatic if they aren't)#(and they get married when the twins areeeee 8 or 9 or something)#(so two guesses what anakin is insecure about here)#(yes i'll put this on ao3 and actually have the conclusion of the fight + the angry passive aaggressive snippy breadmaking scene)#(that turns back into quiet arguing when the twins get bored and go back to the living room to play)#obikin #anakin skywalker #obi-wan kenobi

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