#xena revival
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There are things that time can't change, like Lucy Lawless's badass coolness throwing a punch.
#lucy lawless#xena#xena warrior princess#mine#minions rise of gru#I can't believe it's been 27 years#she still looks the same#A hair dye would be enough and she would be ready for a xena revival
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“I was like, fuck it, I don’t care if this doesn’t sound like the most hip record in the world,” Hayes says unblinkingly. “I don’t care if radio isn’t going to play me. I’m going to release a seven-minute single, I don’t give a shit.”
#!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#BABY LOOK AT YOU!!!!! <3333333#darren hayes#formative influences#idgaf i bought spin and i loved spin and i still love spon#there's a new darren hayes single it's 8 minutes long (actually) and I AM LIVING#baby. you did so good.#i don't know if it's a false memory#but i really feel like i'd heard he was gay before insatiable was released#and the video had such a weird cold sexless vibe (partly) because of that and i remember thinking#that ain't right#watch me spend my whole afternoon in utter bliss listening to darren hayes' middle aged disco revival YES BITCH#savage garden#baby jo's first Band#there was hieronymous bosch art in the cd sleeve#and darren had hair like brian molko#it was everything#memories of ruth - ruth who i was just thinking about being the most stereotypical baby lesbian in hindsight#xena and ps1 and her pressed trousers and pokémon cards#the cuddly canterbury goths#fruit polos on the beach lilies and hash brownies pink panther wafers and emily strange clothes#you know i spent the morning reading about holly johnson and being astounded that i'd missed he was gay#thinking what right do i have supposing it meant anything that i latched onto stephen gately and darren hayes as a kid#but then i saw this headline and MY HEART MY HEART#darren i'm so happy for you#:')))))))#oh uh cws for the article#cw suicide ment#cw mental health problems#cw homophobia
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Swordswoman showdown FINALS
Hornet (Hollow Knight) vs Xena (Xena: Warrior Princess)
(Better here in a "preferred character" sense, not "who would win in a fight")
Propaganda below cut
Hornet
Technically its not a sword but she wields a needle in a setting where swords do not exist and she wields it in an exceedingly swordlike fashion so. She counts; Girlboss demigoddess spider lady. She's been protecting an entire kingdom for longer than many of the other characters have been alive. She systematically kills her siblings for being too weak. She's simply the best.
#im pretty sure hornet can beat like. anyone in a fight.#have you ever fought hornet#its so fucking hard getting past her every time i play hk i go literally insane.
#i remember getting stuck on the first hornet fight on mt first play through and bring likr#''omg the boss fights in this are so hard!!!''#like what. you're not even half way through what are you talking about#you can't even DASH honey. you don't know what's diffcult or not in this game.
So, SPOILERS
but I feel like the "she systematically kills her siblings" part needs a little clarification. See, one of her siblings was used as a living prison for an angry god and that uh. Didn't work out for the sibling in question or anyone else.
This account is itself heavily abbreviated but it's likely that any other sibling Hornet encounters will be trying to take over as the god's new prison. She appears to challenge any sibling she sees to battle, in order to test their resolve against herself and her needle - would they actually have a chance against that god?
We never actually see her kill any siblings, but she does quite pointedly tell one of them that (to paraphrase) "My needle is lethal and I would feel no sadness in a weakling's demise."
Feels like a relevant quote. In any case, if they can't beat Hornet, it seems like her needle would be a far more merciful end than what the god would grant.
Anyway, a bit of additional material for @swordswomanshowdown :
As is the case for any cool swordswoman, it's not just her sword that's lethal, it's her with it. And Hornet's needle was custom made for her - the creators have said that, while other needles exist, hers was made specifically for her to wield, and its construction allows her to use her spider silk better in combat.
And another thing that I think makes her a good swordswoman: she's actually pretty thoughtful about how she uses it. There's a least one instance where she tries to warn someone off before fighting them! At the same time, when she does fight, she seems to enjoy it - during her boss battles, you can hear her laugh sometimes, as if exhiliarated. She's really got it all, as a swordswoman!!!
#HORNET SWEEP CMON PLEEEEEEASE#shes gay. shes the only sibling with a gender. shes a spider named HORNET. look like croissant. whats not to like
Xena
Warrior Princess
She wields a sword and chakram. Just had to submit a biconic swordswoman.
i love her. she made me gay as a kid. Anyway, her weapon of choice is her sword, she is obviously very good with it
#unfortunately i have to choose and i have to choose xena#a) utena had no warcry. b) xena fought gods. c) xena has kickass goofy comic book combat which is my favorite
xena didn’t just fight gods. she fucked up a girl’s life so bad that she (calisto) devoted her entire being to destroying everything that xena loved that ended up with calisto becoming a god in order to destroy xena, which didnt work because xena entombed her in lava. and then when xena and gabrielle encountered calisto in the (christian) afterlife (different from the greek one which they also fought her in), calisto dragged gabrielle to hell so xena became an archangel in order to save gabrielle and then sacrificed herself in order to undo all the harm that she did in calisto’s life and then when not!jesus (played by timothy omundson) revives xena and gabrielle, calisto impregnates xena with the reincarnation of calisto’s soul in order to end the cycle of hate. xena doesnt just fight gods. she creates and destroys them
#this isnt even mentioning her fighting julius ceasar several times#telling brutus that caesar is not his friend#xena and gabrielle’s souls reincarnating across centuries in order to kick ass and fall in love all over again#or the time xena became a god but tbh that ep is kinda ‘uhhhhh…..’ even if they did hire a consultant for it
#I think everyone here knows to vote for Xena. I think a couple people here might have some propaganda for Xena saved already#everyone remember that Xena/Gabrielle is CANON and that's a pretty big deal also#(does anyone have that Xena Loves Trans People interview around because that would also make good propaganda)
I love Xena ❤️ 😍 💖 ❣️
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Hello good afternoon!
On Sam's part, we already have some speculation there in Mordor (will we have a Barbie Fitness revival?).
But what about IFTA? Will we have a two-pronged attack this weekend?
Dear IFTA Anon,
The IFTA event is in Dublin, on April 20th. Next week, not this week-end.
For the moment, we have Landcon in Paris on Saturday and yup, he registered for the Cologne Hyrox on Sunday:
And so is Mrs. Xena, what a surprise:
Of course she geotagged herself, aaah-ing and oooh-ing near the Dome. Ha. Ha.
After all, she told Herr Lederhosen, her Bavarian fan Numero Uno, she was going to race PRO at Hyrox Cologne, hashtag lonewolf, hashtag Club Flamingo (but afterwards, LOL) - more about this, here: https://www.tumblr.com/sgiandubh/744955031835541504/out-of-the-ol-bubble?source=share
If you care to see the event's agenda, you'll notice Hyrox PRO women is very short (I have no clue why, ask me about Pre-Raphaelites, instead) and almost simultaneous with the beginning of the Men's race, where S competes. Cue in salacious comments from *urv, I think we should expect at least that.
On the flip side, a revival would be very farfetched, taking into account that Daily Fail article which portrayed him as a Raya lookin' for a hookin', elite available man (LOL for years). PR might be a bitch, but never does something like that without a reason.
Fingahs crossed for that Flamingo Club. Oh, and pour la bonne bouche, she even told us where she is staying in Cologne:
A 'full appartment with kitchen' and thank you Primal (paid partnership, of course) for today and the ESN hotel, starting tomorrow. Here is an interesting clue, just in case anyone pre-empts the fanfic and imagines a kama-sutra side event in one of the numerous hôtels de charme of Cologne.
There is no ESN hotel (yes, I looked, Deutschland and her beauty are not my forte) in town. The ESN she is talking about is Elite Sports Nutrition, a German fitness supplements company (https://int.esn.com/) prominently featured at FIBO 2024 (same dates, roughly, same place):
They pay for the room and she doesn't even know or care where the hotel is.
So long for the fish, Anon. That settles it for me. Also, for having participated several times at different high-level events organized by the German authorities (think EU ministerial summit level), I can tell you these people do not joke about accommodation, transfers and registration formalities: this is very strict and very, very effective. Best organization in the world and I know something about it.
*fondly and suddenly remembers her miraculous long week-end at the Adlon Hotel, in Berlin, circa 2007 *
[Later edit]: Told you. *urv already wrote Chapter 13 of Fitness at Dawn. It's based in Cologne:
*bangs head against wall*
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#you gotta know how dire the gay tv landscape was in 2005 to understand why this show hit livejournal like an a-bomb#even if you were lucky enough not to get hit directly you were still living in the fallout zone of whatever the fuck this is
PLEASE elaborate 💖 i am sitting and taking notes
i mean, pretty much what it says on the tin - this was before even Glee, it was a fuckin' wasteland out there, especially for major/recurring characters in genre TV. Xena was over; Willow/Tara had long since gone down in flames; Doctor Who had just been revived by a gay showrunner who was being absolutely pilloried in the press for "pushing a gay agenda" over the mere existence of Jack Harkness. hell, even as late as 2009, when Torchwood had been a thing for several years and Russell T Davies was getting fan backlash for killing off one half of the juggernaut m/m pairing, know what the, again, then-current Doctor Who & Torchwood showrunner's advice was for shippers threatening to ragequit?
"I thank them for watching the show and I recommend they go watch Supernatural, because those boys are beautiful. And don’t tell me they’re brothers. [Laughs] Not in my mind."
over on livejournal, fic communities had been trending more and more open to weird shit for a while, but SPN was basically every possible kind of catnip for slash and iddy kink fic rolled into one and the only price of admission was getting over the incest thing. it... pretty much opened the floodgates on taboo fic. (not that there was any shortage of weird shit in, say, harry potter fandom, but there was still a mainstream vs. weird shit distinction, y'know?) the SPN and J2 kinkmemes were like. the twin black holes of weird gay porn at the galactic center of LJ fandom. the shit SPN generated/popularized spread so fast and so widely that it was Basically Impossible to exist on that corner of LJ without constantly hearing echoes of the latest bizarro J2 drama or encountering tropes that had crawled out of the seedy underbelly of SPN fic. we're talking "documented Patient Zero origin of the omegaverse" here.
basically, up until 2 months ago i had only ever seen one episode of this damn show in my life, but i feel like i've been unwilling neighbors with it for 17 fucking years, lol. because ever since the show first aired, it's been impossible to be in slash fandom and NOT be at least adjacent to it.
#supernatural#meta#fandom history#bloodyfirstblade#stanfordsweater#wincest#livejournal#russell t davies#fandom#shine watches spn
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"Xena and Gabrielle weren't canon"
They were canonically life partners that raised a child together: Xena canonically considers Gabrielle "the father", and Eve as "our daughter". They were canonically soulmates: they referred to eachother as such, others referred to them as such, and Xena was the only one who could pass through the soulmate flamesTM to revive Gabrielle. They canonically kissed multiple times. Xena canonically gave Gabrielle a love poem written by Sappho.
It relied on mostly subtext due to the network, but with every watch through I discover another piece of undeniable confirmation that they were a couple. Just because something isn't explicitly and overtly written in neon lights, doesn't make it less of an obvious and canonical choice. Creators, writers and actors have subsequently come out and confirmed they were a couple. XWP paved the way for other wlw shows, it absolutely set the stage for others to be more explicit, and I'm so tired of it being considered less than because Xena and Gabrielle didn't explicitly state their sexuality/identity... They didn't need to, it's so obvious!
#i swear to god xena and gabs couldve finger fucked on screen and thered still be people like 'aw best friends aw sisters"#PLEASE#xena warrior princess#anyway i saw a post and i had to write this i feel calm again now
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Why Ava Silva is the hero we need
Alright, let’s talk about it. I’ve watched A LOT of television over the years and there’s nothing I love more than genre storytelling. Give me an ass-kicking, self-sacrificing female lead who gives everything and still saves the day. And let’s be honest there’s plenty of shows to choose from: Xena to Buffy to Supergirl to animated girlies like Korra and She-Ra and that trope is available in spades. With great power comes great responsibility and all these characters are constantly trying to serve the greater good despite the cost.
And then there’s Ava Silva. She’s already dead when we first meet her and what’s most tragic of all is that she was never able to properly live. A most likely orphaned quadriplegic who’s abused and then murdered by the nun who was charged with caring for her - it’s about as devastating a backstory as you can get. She never has agency over her life or even her death in fact. She’s revived by chance when her corpse is used to hide the halo. She has no say in any of it. Her initial life is destroyed by the car accident that kills her mom, she’s murdered and can’t even rest in peace before being resurrected to then live a second life in which she’s told she has to fight for the Catholic Church (an institution that has only ever caused her harm) and then discovers that her newly granted role of Warrior Nun means she’ll most likely soon die again. Despite all this though (and because of it really) Ava appreciates life. Truly and fully. In a way that we’ve never really gotten to see before. In fact, she’s even selfish about it! How dare “the chosen one” run away in pursuit of her own happiness above all.
In Ava, I’m reminded most of Buffy and the speech she gives to Giles at the end of the first season when she has to come to terms with her imminent death. She’s only sixteen and has to bear the weight of the world on her shoulders. She just wants to be a normal teenager but instead has to become the Slayer.
Like Ava, Buffy dies (twice!). She cracks jokes like Ava makes puns and is extremely loyal to her friends/found family. The biggest difference between these two heroines though becomes apparent when in season six Buffy is ripped from the afterlife and has to fight again. Buffy wanting to be dead was such an insane twist. Shouldn’t the hero want to live?
Buffy’s sacrifice is still some of television’s greatest storytelling. The show was originally going to end there before finding life on a different network (say what you will about that) but for the time it was also a powerful choice.
Fast forward twenty years and along comes Warrior Nun. At this point heroes sacrificing themselves has become the norm. They’re supposed to die. Weighted down by the responsibility of life and “the hardest thing in this world is to live in it” feels like the truest of statements. And let’s be honest, life IS hard. But then there’s Ava.
She appreciates what life can offer. She runs, she stuffs her face with food, she dances, she drinks, she loves deeply and learns to appreciate every sunrise. She doesn’t offer any pretenses about the fulfillment of death and through Ava as an audience we’re reminded of how precious and fleeting and affirming life can be. It’s such an incredibly important message because Warrior Nun wholly embraces (and shows us) what it means to live in a way that genre storytelling hasn’t always been able to.
Of course, Ava still has to sacrifice herself. It wouldn’t be a proper end of the world genre show if she didn’t and her journey to making this decision is what makes this show so good (bless Avatrice). Warrior Nun’s cancellation particularly stings because of this. We still need Ava to have her happy ending. At the very least we’re currently left with the semblance of divinium-fueled hope (thank you Simon Barry!). We know Ava comes back - here’s to hoping the show gets to as well.
#warrior nun#save warrior nun#ava silva#alba baptista#buffy#tv: btvs#buffy the vampire slayer#just a bit of analysis so I don't lose my mind#genre tv#I could write a whole book analyzing what the hero's journey looks like in warrior nun#this post barely grazes the surface#also thank you gif makers
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ROUND 3 REVIVAL
The Round 3 Revival will be posted Tomorrow @ 12:00 PM EST
The Quarterfinals victors were
Xena (Xena: Warrior Princess)
Korra (The Legend of Korra)
Gideon Nav (The Locked Tomb)
She-Ra (She-Ra and the Princesses of Power)
Here are the Round 3 Revival matchups:
Sevika (Arcane) vs Brienne of Tarth (Game of Thrones)
Butch Woman (Fun Home) vs Pyrrha Dve (The Locked Tomb)
Kassandra (Assassin's Creed) vs Abby Anderson (The Last of Us)
Zarya (Overwatch) vs Noi (Dorohedero)
#polls#tumblr polls#tumblr competition#tournament#tumblr tournament#bracket#tumblr bracket#character bracket#character tournament#character competition#beefy babe showdown#beefy babe showdown 2023#round 3 revival
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Tag Game: 9 Favorite Characters
I was tagged by @amemoryofwot let's goo
#1 you already know who it is
Greatest character of all time and loml Janet from the good place yes we are all shocked that I picked her I'm sure but I got a tattoo for a reason THANK YOU JANET
#2 you're gonna start seeing a pattern here
GLaDOS from portal (yes I love AI)
#3 this is the part where I list my otps as if they're one character lmao
I mean. What is there to say. Greta Gill and Carson Shaw absolutely own me
#4 another obvious one
These idiots. Mulder and Scully. You know em you love em the revival never happened if I never watch it 😌
#5 the ogs
Xena and Gabrielle are mandatory
#6 another shocker
It's gelphie. Surprise
#7 alright this is my last couples skate
Siuan and Moiraine from wheel of time even if they hurt me bad
#8 this bitch
I won't elaborate, iykyk
#9 I just
I just love calcifer ok. Idk. Howl's moving castle
I am tagging @masterpieceofunderstatement @not-quitenormal @iscariotmilf @defectivegembrain @unjust-dust @sungmee @morewinepls @briannysey @loamvessel
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top albums of 2023 for me. i dont have spotify so i gotta do this manually.
rankings approximate except the top one. links and thoughts under the cut
greenhouse - arc,regn
ok this may sound silly but: in the 90s, necros (among others) were making some rad tracker music with a very very specific synth sound and overall vibe that i simply have not heard since. this hits that for me.
"露華" necros md tracker idm revived. "spur" feels like it's that tracker sound, removed from tracker limits.
"føn", my second fav track, feels far more Halley Labs, but still carries a hint of that turn-of-the-century tracker spirit.
the opening track, "eko", is SO choice though. fav.
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DJ Shadow - Action Adventure
kind of fascinated with this!
it’s extremely 80s but not always.
“You Played Me” is just an 80s hit. i keep coming back to it lol
(idk “when” you’d place “Free For All” but its also a fav)
how is “Fleeting Youth” so beautiful
im really excited to see DJ Shadow enter the 90s in 2035 or w/e
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PROGedia - Diõscuri
prog hip hop? 6????
yeah that opening track grabbed me and did not let go. holy hell what a banger.
the aoty status is mostly carried on that, but like. it left an impression damnit.
feels like brainfeeder.
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Liminal Warp - Nocturnal Edge 3
downside: anime VO, mixed kinda loud too...
upside: INTENSE.
I've had "Reina" on loop for ages. easy fav, but the rest of the tunes Don't Slack. still deeply fascinated by "yag si urowak". it's like breakcore 2 or smth.
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Skrillex - Quest for Fire
I was really scared when i saw the number of features here but uhh... nope this went hard.
and also i didnt notice at first but one of those features is Joker. like... purple music Joker. and it's the best damn track on the thing.
"Xena" second favorite. insane drum production there.
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Oneohtrix Point Never - Again
This covers the mind-exploding fringes of sampledelica but fresher. Or, actually... maybe that's too reductive.
I remember chimeratio hyping up "Locrian Midwest" specifically, and... yeah I can tell why. That's very him-flavored. The timbral selection is top notch. That last sentence applies to every other moment in every other track, though.
"Plastic Antique" would have murdered me in 2013.
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Patricia Taxxon - TECHDOG 1-7
Of course this would grab me.
I would've just thought it was a delightful romp if it stopped at TECHDOG 1, but damn did it keep going.
"TETCTEHECDCHOHDGDOGOG" was an instant fav, but as time goes on, I keep finding new favorites. I think the build from birds to walls in "OCOTOCODCTCETDTHDEDGEHEGHGHG" is my fav as of writing.
That said, something that struck me imemdiately, got the most replays from me this year, from TECHDOG7: "THTCTHTOTHTCTHDHCHOHCECOCDCOGODOEODGDEDGDEGEGEGEG"
Never has a song so viscerally teleported me to a specific scenario: being a child, alone in a room without knowing why. I can feel the dust in the air. Insanely good.
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Blawan - Dismantled Into Juice
Man.
This one hit my DNA.
The title track, "Dismantled Into Juice" not only is my fav here but it's influenced how i think abt music.
AOTY.
...EPOTY?
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whats sins of the past whats her deal whats up with her 👀
sins of the past is the most indulgent thing i have ever even thought about writing. it's the xena ronance au. nancy is xena. robin is gabrielle. steve is joxer.
if you aren't familiar with xena, basically: former warlord (xena) tries to atone for her sins and along the way she meets gabrielle, a bard who seeks adventure. they laugh they fight they dance they kiss (...kind of...) but there's a lot of build up before they actually kiss.
there is a scene in the season 1 finale of xena where gabrielle fucking. dies. (this will not be the last time she does, either) and xena will NOT allow that. so xena invents cpr and revives gabrielle. it's a very good episode. a lot of it is about xena learning to open up and atone for her sins and gabrielle taking none of her shit. and also gabrielle getting into some Wack situations. gabrielle ends up following xena (after xena explicitly tells her not to lmao) they are just so very ronance coded (to me) that i think it would be very fun to at least explore!!
and now, a snippet for u !
Nancy purses her lips, eyes narrowing, scanning Robin. Robin stands her ground, tries to stave off the anxiety rising in her stomach, the need to fidget with her fingers or shift her weight under Nancy’s intense stare. She’s not going to fuck up her only chance to get out of this town.
#got mail! 📩#fishwear#xena has some banger episode titles i'm ripping straight from that lol#xena ronance au#also if u want to read more i have some more stuff under the 'xena ronance au' tag!!
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She is still our Warrior Princess.
#lucy lawless#xena#xena warrior princess#my life is murder#alexa crowe#mine#nothing has changed... nothing#she can still play Xena in a revival
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other random sunfall shit that's either funny or important
Another cut because it's a little Long with all the stuff I threw into one mf Thing
Funny fun facts from the original dream:
In my dream this actually started out as Kai redoing Dreamswap, and then halfway through my brain was like 'actually this is Silver's AU' and completely forgot kai except for the art style for the mental image of everyone in the frozen living room. I forgot about the first half when I woke up tho
Cross and Ink were dudes again even though they're girls To Me. Which is so funny
dude the ice chairs were sick
The ice chairs melted when the new boyes also thawed out. very sad. The two Inks, single Finch, and single Cross were there and the chairs started melting first and they were all like "Cross what did you do" and Cross was so indignant.
Dream II momentarily turned into Reverie/OG Dream when he was revived and tried to write 'hi Dream!!!' on Dream I's old notes. we had to tell him old Dream was gone. I think he got sad but around there is where I woke up
Dream II had my awful cursive handwriting for some reason FDFDSFSFDS
Finch was like....i don't know really prim and proper?? He was sitting like a princess in front of the fireplace for the crack photograph. I don't know what that was about but that's the main reason I think he was supposed to get a new version
yeah the one Ink had all the vibes of OG, and the paint thing, just with DS's outfit. I don't know what the fuck that was about. It was so stupid (funny). Cross and the other Ink were much closer to the camera and Ink looked and acted more like DS, and Cross...tbh i don't remember. he seemed pretty normal. Maybe he wasn't though.
I never actually saw any of the castle except for that one room. it was just 'yeah they're in an ice castle. and frozen
Other stuff:
It was going to be cryosleep and not petrification, bc that’s what it was in the dream, but there is literally no reason to do that to them. Freezing Orion and Corvus isn’t going to made them stronger it’s just going to make them sopping wet and really dumb for the first hour after they thaw out
Corvus looks terrified as a statue :))
Glaze doesn’t respond to her name in donut shops because she just automatically assumes it’s someone ordering a glazed donut instead of someone calling her name.
Do you know how long it took me to push Corvus and Glaze together. Anyways Corv’s pet name for Glaze is Donut and Corv is the the reason Glaze is now actually putting effort into deal with The Maelstrom.
There were actually quite a few survivors from JR. There was even enough to keep it going (even if just to say we survived. There’s not many of us but we’re still here and by god we’re doing our best), but they were scattered and the few others Ink and Finch found had already resigned themselves to trying to make a new life for themselves in this apocalyptic hellscape that the MV has become.
“Alright you little shits it’s scavenger hunt time. Whoever finds the most stuff on the list gets a candy bar” - exhausted Ink at 11pm having to go on an emergency grocery run because 4-year-old Temp and Glaze eat way more than she thought they would and she is still trying to figure out how much food she needs for the three of them. No, they can’t read yet; their lists are in pictographs. Reason #99 why she should not be responsible for kids. She really needs another adult.
Ink almost didn’t bother enrolling Temp and Glaze in a school bc it seemed like a lot of headache-inducing paperwork, but the lure of ‘time to herself without two hyperactive children’ was too strong.
Xena and Java didn’t go to a proper school like the other clones, tho. Cross and Error just weren’t sure they could get Xena and Java to school. They did their best to homeschool them instead. Finch and Hacker gave them some basic shit to teach the kids too, because Finch was pretty sure they’d forget some actually important stuff. He was right btw. Xena and Java are lucky they know as much math as they do. They’re also lucky Cross and Error were willing to ask for help teaching them how to read and stuff because dear god
Cross really can’t blame Xena for not wanting to do this, but Xena hasn’t turned in her resignation form yet, which is the only reason Cross is pushing her to work on her shit. Xena does not realize this yet. Glaze is also seeing this and is very sure the older ones are forcing them to do this, which is why she hasn’t said anything.
All the older ones kinda decide to start training the kids to fight at different points. Finch and Hacker took the longest to. As much as Finch wants Wren to be able to at least defend themself, he really doesn’t think young kids need to learn to fight.
Oddly enough Ink took the second longest. She wasn’t too worried about it being appropriate or whatever to teach kids of a certain age to fight, her logic was just “I have very little patience. Kids test my patience more than most things. Kids are also very stupid. I should wait until they’re less likely to get themselves killed trying to learn how to hold a stick with a sharp pointy end.” She did teach them how to use their other magic, though.
Cross and Error started teaching Xena and Java about their magic pretty early on. Their logic was ‘if they know how to control it young, there won’t be problems with runaway magic. Just problems figuring out where the cookie jar went and catching kids swinging from the ceiling’. They still wait for them to be at least double digits old before starting combat training. And they didn’t use real weapons.
All of the clones have the same birthday.
Oddly enough, Aster actually wanting to help encouraged the others a lot. ‘You mean you WANT to be involved in this thing we don’t feel we have a choice in??? …maybe it won’t be that bad.’
None of the clones realized Corvus and Orion were going to wake up in their lifetimes. Especially not this soon holy shit.
Had Corvus and Orion been more prepared, that one fight may not have gone as badly as it did. As it was they were young and inexperienced and had even less idea what they were doing than the others. They’re lucky they didn’t die. Hell they’re lucky it was only about 20 years and not 100. Or 500.
Corvus and Orion do have a destiny bond. Had being turned to stone killed Orion, Corvus would not have lasted even a second longer in that first big fight with the Maelstrom.
Also Corvus and Orion are both right about becoming radiants/corrupts. It would make it much easier for them to deal with the Maelstrom, but it would also make them much more vulnerable.
Worst Ending Corvus & Orion:
Corvus’ body is now made entirely of corruption and she can turn into a ✨goo puddle✨like OG Nightmare. Her body is very, very endothermic. Worst ice hands ever
Orion on the other hand is very EXOthermic and very very hot so like. Be careful
Orion is an unfortunate combination of Dream’s holier-than-thou-ness and some pretty awful manipulative tendencies. Obviously she is in the right, smh. But if she needs to do a little persuading, she’s not above using tricks and lies. She fights dirty, don’t let her talk of honor and righteousness fool you
Corvus is, surprisingly, rather honest most of the time, which doesn’t help Glaze when Corv offers to let her join her. Still, the corruption in her wants only one thing, and she will stoop as low as she needs to achieve it.
Poor, poor Glaze. She promised herself she’d protect Corvus, and now she has to help kill her.
The pair of them are mere shadows of their former selves.
ALSO hey here's a bonus Xena that no one asked for (even though i said someone oughta smh)
#Sunfall DS#Sunfall Xena#Sunfall Java#Sunfall Corvus#Sunfall Orion#Sunfall Aster#Sunfall Tempera#Sunfall Glaze#Sunfall Wren#Glaze + Corvus my beloveds#they're so gay#also XENA is SO#Yells#god#no one asks about the extra Xena :((#wheeze is the only one who saw and only bc i sent it to them unpromted#i forgor to post this i had 500000 things going on augh
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Swordswoman Showdown Semifinals
Xena (Xena: Warrior Princess) vs Camilla Hect (The Locked Tomb)
(Better here in a "preferred character" sense, not "who would win in a fight")
Camilla art by @friendamedes, used with permission
Propaganda below cut
Xena
Xena
Warrior Princess
She wields a sword and chakram. Just had to submit a biconic swordswoman.
i love her. she made me gay as a kid. Anyway, her weapon of choice is her sword, she is obviously very good with it
#unfortunately i have to choose and i have to choose xena#a) utena had no warcry. b) xena fought gods. c) xena has kickass goofy comic book combat which is my favorite
xena didn’t just fight gods. she fucked up a girl’s life so bad that she (calisto) devoted her entire being to destroying everything that xena loved that ended up with calisto becoming a god in order to destroy xena, which didnt work because xena entombed her in lava. and then when xena and gabrielle encountered calisto in the (christian) afterlife (different from the greek one which they also fought her in), calisto dragged gabrielle to hell so xena became an archangel in order to save gabrielle and then sacrificed herself in order to undo all the harm that she did in calisto’s life and then when not!jesus (played by timothy omundson) revives xena and gabrielle, calisto impregnates xena with the reincarnation of calisto’s soul in order to end the cycle of hate. xena doesnt just fight gods. she creates and destroys them
#this isnt even mentioning her fighting julius ceasar several times#telling brutus that caesar is not his friend#xena and gabrielle’s souls reincarnating across centuries in order to kick ass and fall in love all over again#or the time xena became a god but tbh that ep is kinda ‘uhhhhh…..’ even if they did hire a consultant for it
#I think everyone here knows to vote for Xena. I think a couple people here might have some propaganda for Xena saved already#everyone remember that Xena/Gabrielle is CANON and that's a pretty big deal also#(does anyone have that Xena Loves Trans People interview around because that would also make good propaganda)
I love Xena ❤️ 😍 💖 ❣️
Cam
trained w a rapier & knives. practical. handsome. extremely efficient and capable.; she’s my boyfriend and I love her. Please vote for cam she is my life
Gideon Nav uses one very large sword in defiance of the expectation that a cavalier should use a rapier, but Camilla Hect instead uses two. Just as much defiance of social expectation, twice as many blades. The reveal of her specific brand of swordiness is the heart of one of the book's most iconic lines: "Cam? Go loud."; In the spirit of the laconic charm of the Warden's Hand I will simply say "Camilla's competent."
She prefers two short swords but has been know to wield a rapier and other such bladder instruments; She also loves to organize spreadsheets
Go loud.
#xena#xena: warrior princess#camilla hect#the locked tomb#swordswoman showdown#poll#official#round 5#semifinals
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Here’s my new oc (yeah, in gacha club cuz why not):
Name: X3N@ (Xena)//Z
Age: 17 y/o
Gender/Sexuality: Non-binnary (she/they)/Bisexual
Lives in: ???
Born in: England
Language: French/English
Fav food: Heart/Brain/Blood
Childhood rule (Hero/Scapegoat/Lost child/mascot): Lost Child
Species: Corrupted dragon
Siblings: Rose (dead)
-------------------------------------------------------
(The oc and backstory is based on a alternative end: if i went to the train the 7th september 2023)
It was 10PM and a half, Z (My first letter of my name) and A (first letter of my sister’s name) ran to the train while their father and their step mother were arguning. But an old man kidnapps the girls and kills A, but sells Z to a labotary.
Then, Z for experimented until their 15... While, she met, G00D M0TH3R (GOOD MOTHER/Astrid, 41 y/o), 3LL!@ (Ellia, 39 y/o) and their son:
G00D S0N (none took him) (Good Son, Leo 17 y/o)
Then Z and them, burned the labo, and they hope to find all of Z’s friends...
--------------------------------------------------
Z decides ton rename herself as X3N@, for have a matching name like all of her family...
And two years later, an apocalypse was found, G00D M0TH3R and 3LL!@ met Veroshki (none took him) and Hemoo (none took them) they helped them (yeah logic)
While that, X3N@ AND G00D S0N met Ikuzabi (none took her), Cece (None Took him), and Lola (none took her) . They saved them from one of hernos (the villain of the story)’s robots while those 3 were running from an old man.
Then they started a new adventures... And discovers some plot twist...
When they all find out that Hernos was manipulated by his brother, Koreremu, they décidé to forgive Hernos and became an ally...
----------------------------
At the end, X3N@ died, but idk how and why, they revived... and Koreremu died ofc...
But with a new body: *i will send X3N@'s final design when i have the time*
And they moved out in a island that none will know about it...
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"It's not historically accurate" that's because... It's not history!
I've seen these complaints in regard to Game of Thrones and even though I'm not that big of a George R. R. Martin fan it frustrated me even then.
Now, today, someone has informed me how annoyed they are that Jaskier's songs are called bard songs because they're actually "Corporate pop songs."
Yes, of course they are "Corporate pop songs." They are songs made for a fantasy show produced by Netflix. They didn't use necromancy to revive an actual medieval minstrel.
Game of Thrones or A Song of Ice and Fire (books) are not really set in the middle ages. They're a fantasy book series set in a world that just resembles our middle ages. It's very, very loosely based on the War of the Roses with the Lannisters representing the Lancasters and Stark representing York.
The Witcher is yet another medieval looking fantasy but it should be obvious that it's not actually the middle ages.
Traditionally most High Fantasy settings resemble the middle ages of Europe.
I explain this with the acknowledgement that worlds where magick is common place, technology and culture might be slower to develop as necessity is the mother of invention and with magick answering certain needs, the necessity isn't there so progress may be slower.
Part of why I had liked Carnival Row was the change of the traditional High Fantasy setting from mediaeval-like to resembling the late nineteenth century / Victorian era.
But these stories are not actually set in our world. You should not be expecting historical accuracy.
Jaskier LOOKS like a 1980s rock star. You are not going get him to sing a "real" bard song. You're going to get a rock / pop-esque song done in Bard-like style where it's recognizable as being a bard singing but certainly not historically accurate. It's not history.
Jaskier wears a burgundy colored leather jacket. Ciri wears leggings. Yennefer had a magical hysterectomy. the word "Okay" has been used even though the term is less than two hundred years old. They use modern-Modern English.
I take Jaskier's anachronistic look (and I use the term loosely as it's not our real mediaeval era) to show us, the audience, that he is a rock musician of that world. And how much of a star he actually is is all dependent upon who you ask.
They use the term Mutant in the Witcher. Have you any idea how recent that word is? It's less than a hundred and fifty years old.
It's unfair to penalize The Witcher for "not being historically accurate" when that's not what was meant to be. It's a fantasy world that resembles our mediaeval era. It's not actually medieval.
The same applies for Dungeons and Dragons...
These are not histories. They aren't even set in our world. Stop expecting our world's historical limitations.
Expecting these stories to be historically accurate is actually worse than expecting Xena: Warrior Princess to be an accurate depiction of Ancient Greece. At least that one actually claims the setting is Ancient Greece.
In closing, yes, Jaskier's songs are corporate pop. They are rock or pop-like songs written for a fantasy TV show created by Netflix. You're not wrong about that. It is foolish to expect authentical medieval minstreling in a show like The Witcher.
That being said...
"Toss a coin to your Witcher,
O' Valley of plenty!
O' Valey of plenty!
Toss a coin to your Witcher.
He's a friend of humanity."
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