#whether you as the character actually hurt others. or are used as an object to cause emotional pain (ie the to die part of it etc)
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a lot can be said about wind up doll as a very karen song. many ways to approach this. one that makes me sad is thinking about her as Pure Love Interest. when her only narrative function is to be that and nothing more even though she has the chances and has shown she can be something beyond that. but reduced to it nonetheless. ouuuughhh wind up doll everyone knows wind it up and way it goes it does the things it's taught to too i guess im kinda of a wind up dolly too i really walk i really talk i'll come straight to you take me home im quite a prize wind me up you'll realize just how much a wind up doll can do here's a key unlock my heart wind up dolls sometimes get lonely too wind me up i'll fall in love with you. KARENNNNNNNNN
#again while i will never be a lover in moments like these i GET how people can be.#so many layered feelings on her... victim of bad writing but the bad writing became too much of who she just Was as a character.#but there are moments where she So shines. so much potential in her. so much that could have been done!!!!#reduced in the end to nothing but a wind up doll who was taught to be a love interest and to die.#many such cases in this title. many such cases for so many women in so many stories!!! auugghhh!!!!!!#static.soundz#also note in my thought process here love interest in this case also entails the idea you are designed to be hurt and to hurt others.#whether you as the character actually hurt others. or are used as an object to cause emotional pain (ie the to die part of it etc)#which then also means you are designed to be hurt in that second part. or if not that. other characters are hurting you to fuel heartbreak#and up the stakes for the romance. so again. you are meant to be nothing but an object of hurt in some fashion#such is your duty as a love interest. your wind up doll teaching!
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skip to loafer chapter 60 analysis and brief character study on shima // spoilers
a light and fun chapter that hides something between the lines: how frankenstein's loneliness and revolt becomes a mirror for shima's feelings
(since the translation is very fresh, very very close to the release of the chapter, i will try to use the raws more. this is a way to make you curious to read the translation and also to support sensei in a way! hope you guys understand)
it's actually funny how much i'm surprised by every skip to loafer chapter. of course, some things i feel were expected to happen, but others appear suddenly and drive me completely crazy — that's the gift of takamatsu, who’s able to have fun with her own characters to the point of unfolding a delicate writing, that's much deeper than it appears to be.
i think it's cute and fun how shima's jealousy starts to be used as a comic relief in the story. it's something very innocent, which doesn't harm either party, but rather makes something new bubble up inside him, a feeling he wasn't familiar with before. he knows how it hurts to see mitsumi with other people and how he wants to be close to her, but he still doesn't have the necessary repertoire to express exactly what he feels.
and then, to add an additional element to the plot, sensei chooses frankenstein as the play for the school festival, shima's second great performance. she chooses a story of loneliness and desire, of a monster made of scraps of other people who tirelessly seeks his space in the world while being denied by his own creator — doesn't that sound a little familiar to you?
shima is, whether we like it or not, a fragment of other people's expectations. he is everything his mother wanted him to be, but also his broken expectations. he’s also made up of all the desires he represses and the times he was used by people as an object to be displayed. shima is a monster made of other people's expectations who seeks in other people's warmth a way to find a cure for his own loneliness.
and this ends up being even more explicit when he shows that he is truly happy and fulfilled when acting in the play. for the first time, he's not doing this for his mother or any adult's validation: he's doing it in the name of himself, his wants and his own way. he is slowly making peace with acting and his complex feelings surrounding it.
but, like it or not, shima still hasn't gotten rid of all his traumas, and this becomes slightly clear when sensei chooses to make a game with the lines of two different characters: shima and his internal monologue versus ujiie, a person who has slowly been causing him some complex feelings.
"i thought to myself it would be nice if i could perform this role better than anyone else" followed by "isn't that the bare minimum?". it's as if ujiie, unintentionally and through no fault of his own, was embodying a mixture of shima's personal ghosts and all the expectations that were thrown at him throughout his life.
isn't that the bare minimum? you've lived your whole life playing the role of someone who wasn't you, of a puppet. so...isn't that the least you could do? facing the scientist who created the monster, wouldn't that be a way of being able to face everything that was built in its place?
i think it's beautiful the way that sensei plays between shima's old feelings and these new ones that he's been discovering little by little. yes, he is finding happiness in acting again, finding his space in the world, but he is also developing a new feeling that he has never felt for anyone before. seeing mitsumi surrounded by so many other people gives him a somewhat irritating itch, which he himself doesn't know how to resolve — after all, he's a teenager, no teenager really knows how to resolve such complex feelings.
this makes him expose his neediness. seeing mitsumi, the girl he likes so much, surrounded by people who aren't him, makes him act like a needy teenager who doesn't know how to ask for attention.
different from what the girls thought at first, i don't think shima tried, in any way, to manipulate mitsumi. i really agree with yasaka on this part and i'll add even more: i believe that even he doesn't really know what he's doing. not even he knows exactly how he feels about mitsumi. but what he feels, at the moment, is an enormous desire to be with her and have her all to himself. he just needs to find a way to express his feelings in a clearer and more rational way (but i think that will take a while). It’s almost like the monster on his journey to find his beloved.
now about the other parts of the chapter: seeing the girls come together to discuss something that mitsumi was so afraid to tell before makes my heart fill with joy. seeing a group of girls so unique, so concerned about each other and so comfortable opening their hearts to each other makes me happy in a surreal way. i love, love, love the way in which sensei develops their friendship and how she always, always tries to show how much the girls are willing to help mitsumi even without knowing exactly how.
reading "yeah, none of us have that much experience with dating" is so cute to me. they are teenagers, they are also, for the first time, facing a wave of new feelings, new challenges — and the great luck is that they have each other to support and seek help.
i'm also very happy how yazaka is, little by little, gaining new friends and opening up more. i confess that in the past i didn't know exactly how to interpret her character, but now i want her to get more and more involved with girls. she deserves to have a group of friends who count on her to express doubts and seek help, just as she also needs that same support system.
well, as the girls said "all we can do is watch over them" and that's exactly all we can do too. i believe that this journey of self-discovery, for both shima and mitsumi, still has a long way to go and i think this is extremely special. this just shows how much they both love each other as people and are willing to try to meet each other halfway so that all their feelings are equalized.
once again, we have an amazing chapter in our hands. sensei keeps getting better and better, surprising us every damn time. i'm just so happy to be able to read such beautiful story and lucky to experience all of this. we're so damn lucky. remember: please support sensei if you can, by buying the chapters (via comic days or the online version of the magazine or the volumes). thank you SO MUCH for reading!! will love to discuss more with you all 💛
#skip to loafer#skip and loafer#skip to loafer chapter 60#skip to loafer spoiler#skip and loafer spoilers#stl spoilers#A SHIMA CHAPTER IS A ME CHAPTER#I COULD ANALYZE THE SHIT OUT OF HIM FOR DAYS#MY BABY MY SON#I LOVE HIM SM#AND I LOVE FEMALE FRIENDSHIP SO MUCH#TAKAMATSU THE GENIUS YOU ARE#duckmetas
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I am once again thinking about the term "suicide survivors". How it's a term that rightfully belongs to those that lived through a suicide attempt, that literally survived suicide. How instead it means those that lived through someone else's death. How it neans "surviving" in only the archaic use 'survived by" used in obituaries. How suicide "survivors" lived through something that was never going to kill them, that was never even a threat to their life.
How we are only ever a footnote in the stories of others. We're a tragedy that happens to people, a cautionary tale if we die and inspiration porn if we live. How, forever long we do live, we were suicidal, past tense, because it makes people too uncomfortable too acknowledge that suicidality is chronic (whether pathological or environmental).
How everyone wants to do suicide prevention but no one wants to acknowledge the people at the center of it. How it's never actually about our needs - or even about our safety, really. It doesn't matter what trauma or pain we must endure - they'll have us live if it kills us. Never mind social programs to give us housing, food, security, to make us want to live - it's our responsibility to find someone to tell us it's all in our heads and we need meds to fix us, because it's CRAZY to want to die. Make sure the hotlines can all call the cops if we don't comply.
Don't we know how selfish it is to want to not be in pain and be so desperate that we're willing to die for it? Don't we know how selfish it is to not have any access to the things we need to survive? Don't we know that suicidal depression is really our duty to get over, because obviously if we don't take meds that don't work or that make us sick, if we don't submit to medical gaslighting, if we don't "try" to recover, it's not like it's an illness or a disability! It's selfishness, a character flaw.
Don't we know that we're the selfish ones, when they make our struggling, our illness, our deaths, about us and not them?
It's sanism at its most basic. We're not reliable narrators of our own experiences. We're not the main characters of even our own stories. We're there to be a single pretty tear rolling down the cheek of our loved ones. We're tragedy-as-an-object, as an object lesson. "Make sure you pick yourself up by your bootstraps seek help so you don't become an inconvenience for us hurt your loved ones." Even STILL the focus is not on the harm done to yourself, except as a moral failure in that it harms the healthy people around you.
Quite frankly, I'm sick of it. I don't ever want someone to call themselves a "suicide survivor" again who means it not as "I've survived BEING suicidal" but as "I lived through someone else being in so much pain that they took their own life over it". Not when there still exist people that have survived attempts or are actively suicidal. This is our narrative, not one for you to center yourselves in.
I will not go so far as to say your grief is selfish. That would be cruel. But your grief IS about someone else. This is still THEIR story.
It is likewise the same pain, the same trauma, and the same ableism and sanism we face over it, for those of us who have actually survived it, more than it is that of those who have never stood on that edge. It is the same decentering of our own stories when we go through the exact same thing.
It is the same surviving another day of being suicidal, another attempt, and hearing people who have either never been suicidal or simply are not talking about their own survivorship of suicidality, have the audacity to call themselves survivors of something that they never survived. To take something that KILLED someone they love and claim to be survivors of it.
Cancer survivors had cancer. Automobile collision survivors were in collisions. Survivors of critical illnesses or disabling/severe injuries lived through those illnesses or injuries affecting THEIR lives. But suddenly when a deadly chronic illness kills someone, in this one case, the survivors are the ones who watched someone die of it?
Nah. This isn't a mass threat like a shooting or a pandemic, where your life was ever in danger. You're not the survivor. Your grief is valid, and there absolutely needs to be times and places where being a GRIEF survivor is centered, where your healing and well-being is focused on.
But let those of us who we so sick we nearly died for it, or DID die from it, be the center of THAT story.
Dead men tell no tales, so at least have the grace to let the echoes of our voices remain, unspoken over. And for gods' sakes, remember that there are people that DID make it through alive, that we're still talking, that our voices are most important in a conversation about OUR potentially deadly illnesses.
We're still here telling our own tales.
#cw suicide#suicide#suicide survivor#sanism#ableism#psychiatric neglect#psychiatric abuse#anti psych#anti psychiatry#forced recovery
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Jax & Reader with Social Anxiety.
fandom: the amazing digital circus
relationship: jax (romantic/platonic)
warnings: bullying, victim blaming, (spoiler: abstraction)
let me know if more warnings need to be added!
notes: this can be seen as both platonic and romantic!! however, i tried to make it more in character... so he's kind of an ass. definitely not healthy but yeah, might make a happy version
self indulgent. i love torture
From the moment he set eyes upon you, Jax was quick to notice your soft appearance, your timid nature, and your quiet demeanor. Your lack of confidence, your fear of standing up for yourself, and your inability to speak your mind painted a target on your back that he couldn't ignore.
He could sense that you were vulnerable, so he decided to use that to his advantage. For Jax, you were an easy target, someone he could easily dominate and manipulate at will. He took advantage of your anxiety, asking you for favors, making unreasonable demands, and ultimately using you in whatever way he desired, without regard for your feelings.
"Yo, mind helping me out with the next in-house adventure? I feel like you owe me a favor for today," he said, a mischievous grin spreading across his face.
"But you didn't do anything..."
"Hm, wha'd'you say?" He questioned in a cocky manner, feigning innocence. "I didn't quite catch it, try speaking up."
As time passed, Jax's actions began to weigh heavily onto his conscience. The more he thought about what he's done to you, the more guilt he began to feel.
Jax knew that what he was doing was wrong, he was being a piece of shit just because he could. However, he didn't want to admit that he was being a douche to you for no good reason, oddly enough. Instead, he made up excuses to justify his behavior, something he never did with the other members in the circus.
"They looked at me with a weird look today, that clearly deserves a lengthy visit." He would say to himself, knowing damn well that all you did was offer a weaker smile than you usually do.
Jax was determined to make it seem like you were to blame, even though deep down, he knew that wasn't true. He tries his best to come up with excuses and rationalizations for his attitude towards you, all in an attempt to make himself feel better. It frustrates him just how much you get under his skin without even knowing.
"Well, 's not my fault you're easily scared." He shrugged, raising his arms up in a weak attempt to defend himself.
"...You threw knucklebones at me. I... didn't even say anything to provoke you."
"I said what I said."
As Jax continued to be cruel to you, he began to find himself becoming attached. It started out in small ways — like asking the others where you were when you weren't around, asking for your opinion on things, and generally hanging around you more. You became the center of his attention, the object of his affection and the target of his cruelty.
However, if anyone else, whether intentionally or unintentionally, were to harm you in any way, Jax gets extremely possessive. He insists that he was the only one who should be hurting you, that he was the one who had the right to do it.
"Gangle cut ya, y'shouldn't be hanging around her." Jax said, lips curling into a tense smile. He stood tall and imposing, his eyes fixed on you, studying your reaction to his words.
"I-I tripped over Pomni and fell on Gangle's mask... it wasn't her fault." You desperately tried to explain, waving your arms around frantically.
"So it was Pomni's fault."
Although he sometimes comes across as cold and detached, he does care for you. He's just never fully learned how to express his feelings in a way that's both honest and genuine, without it sounding overly sappy or corny.
Jax considers you the first person he's met in this digital world that he actually enjoys spending time with, even though you don't necessarily feel the same way.
He wants to be liked by you, but he feels that he has missed his chance to gain your trust. He doesn't want to hurt or offend you in any way, but he doesn't know how to make it right. He can't go back in time and erase the mistakes that he has made, and he feels like his only option is to keep up the same behavior as before. So, he does.
Every time Jax sees you, he feels a twinge of guilt. He knows that he's messed up, but he doesn't know how to change things. He was too far gone to stop the cycle of his own doing, his pride wouldn't let him stop his cruelty towards you.
"Uhh, anyone home?" Jax knocked on the door to your room, a slight glimmer of concern in his eyes as he twirled your key in his hand.
"Y'haven't left yer room in days, did I go too far?" He laughed, leaning against the doorframe and crossing his arms over his chest. Jax gives an exhausted sigh at the lack of response, before getting down on his knees to the lock on your door. With an almost automatic movement, he slides the key into the lock, a small smile playing at the corners of his lips.
"Surely ya can find it in yer heart to forgive me, pipsqueak." His hand turns the key slowly, the lock clicking as it opens. He pushes the door open, and walks in without waiting for an invitation.
As he stepped inside, Jax was met with a dozen pairs of eyes staring back at him.
"%$!#..."
Perhaps he should have put aside his pride, and instead made an attempt to reach out to you.
© rhystial 2023 — my works may not be reproduced in any form and by any means without my consent/permission, translating my works is only okay if i give you the okay.
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Trying to parse my thoughts on Izzy's death and why I had a different reaction to it than I thought I would. To summarize: I thought I wouldn't like it, but also that they wouldn't do it; the opposite happened– they did it but I'm ok with it.
I'm also feeling like talking through some mourning for an amazing character, so follow along if that's you, too 😌
(I should probably clarify the following thoughts are coming from someone who deeply enjoyed this season.)
I first wondered what would be of Izzy around the end of season 1. I expected him to have a heel-face turn – which I object to calling a redemption arc and I'll get into why, because the distinction ties into his death imo. A lot of antagonistic characters' changes of heart end directly in death, but I thought they'd subvert that trope. And they... did, actually, despite Izzy dying. Not an option I had imagined.
What the show avoided is the logic, the set of tropes attached to the deaths of this kind of character. These deaths usually come as a consequence of the character's changed ethics or "redemption". My being against that scenario came from the diverging natures of traditional redemption arcs and OFMD's rhetoric.
A traditional redemption arc functions by a kind of catholic logic, if you will: the villain can become one of the good guys by balancing out his "sins"/bad deeds with enough good deeds to tip a moral scale. This often involves a purifying suffering, which acts as an agent to expiate one's faults. To the viewer, this suffering can serve to activate our empathy and make the character more sympathetic. It can also legitimize his quest: our trust in the character's good intentions comes from seeing that the character is ready to make sacrifices to become better and he isn't deterred by the hardships of doing the right thing.
The death occurring at the end of a traditional redemption arc acts as the ultimate sacrifice and/or purification. A number of ideas might be at play behind it, depending on each story: only in death can the soul become fully pure, or a final sacrifice is "needed" to demonstrate the change once and for all, or change was only possible up to a point after which there is no viable/acceptable future – the character deserves moral points for changing, but not so many that he also deserves a full life, or past crimes make him more expendable, etc.
But these are all ideas that aren't evoked in any of the crew's journey in OFMD. For starters, the show isn't interested in "catholic" redemption; its focus is on reintegration/rehabilitation into the community. Rather than appealing to the more traditional (in Western media) and more christian principle of "purification of the soul through mortification of the body", it plays with notions of restorative justice.
We see it especially this season with Ed and Izzy. Ed's arc is a whole little lab for it. We have the community being made to decide whether he can stay or should leave; catbell!Ed is made to apologize to the people affected – which he initially does abysmally, with what fandom has dubbed his "CEO's/YouTube apology". Later, he's given the opportunity to have a more honest and genuine conversation with Fang where he learns about how he hurt him. He's made to repair some of the material damage his behavior caused. Some members feel repaid by the idea that they did to him the same he did to them (Fang) while others don't (Lucius), and the show touches on what this means for each/legitimizes both feelings. Arguably, Ed using his treasure to throw Calypso's birthday party – a much needed refrain and moment of social (re-)connection within the community – is an additional form of reparation. While Stede's belief in Ed has a clear role in helping Ed change for the better, Izzy's s2 journey focuses even more intensely on the role of social support within an individual's constructive (re-)integration into their community. The show is condensed by choice of format, but the beats are all there.
With that kind of rhetoric set up, I'd never be able to accept Izzy dying in a way that feels like a punishment for his past crimes, nor in a way that should "confirm" his positive change/"purify" him for good. And he doesn't! By the time he dies, we know full well he's deeply changed, it's already established to completion. How it happens has nothing to do with proving himself – he's randomly shot in battle. It's never questioned that the time he got to live surrounded by affection mattered. The speech he gives Ed is only possible because he's changed, accessing a completely different perspective on piracy/life than before, like we see when he talks to Ricky earlier. The reason the whole crew is paying respect and crying is because he became "the new unicorn", a treasured member with a defined role. But his death itself is the show going back to the initial symbolism of Izzy as ultimate pirate. The narrative function of his death is underscoring that the age of piracy has come to an end. It's nothing to do with his change. It's posited as the "natural conclusion" (again, by symbolic function) of a character that represented piracy through-and-through, not the "natural conclusion" of a process of becoming better.
And for me, that difference changes everything. I can see and accept the logic behind it, even as I mourn Izzy as a character. It makes the grief feel like a catharsis I experience within the context of the story I'm watching, rather than a grief I feel from a show "betraying" me.
It's also a difference that completely changes how Izzy's death relates to his queerness. Izzy's change is intertwined with being able to express queer affection openly. Becoming "a unicorn" is this extremely queer imagery already – a magical rainbow creature. His role becomes akin to a mother to the crew (the mother hen!Izzy many headcanoned last season, tapping into his potential), a position that isn't extraneous to older queens, including our honored real-life mean-old-queer men. Last season he threatened another queer man for showing too much delicacy, effeminacy, vulnerability. Now, his change is a process that culminates in him singing a tender love song among the crew in drag. He's given the privilege of playing the soundtrack to our protagonists making love for the first time, which ties him symbolically to the event in a way it does no other crew member. Suffice it to say that insinuating his process of change should end in death would have been disastrous, as far as I'm concerned. Antithetical to the show's supporting ideology.
But that's not how it went. Grief occupies a big role in the queer community, but it's so rare that we get to experience it cathartically. In real life, we often have to contend with the ways queerphobia causes us trauma or even shortens our lives, or the lives of our friends. In fictional narratives, a lot of characters that get to express queerness unabashedly still die for the transgression. They're still usually the only queer character with relevant screen time or at all, at best one of two that formed a tragic couple.
We almost never have the opportunity to just mourn some motherfucker who died because they meant something else as well that was central to their character. To mourn and know we're mourning someone who wasn't ever punished for being queer-as-in-fuck-you and going all out. To mourn and not feel like it's another message of queer doom, because for once the character is surrounded by an entire crew of other queer characters that go on to live and be happy. To know the story is saying something about life, not about being queer. To know this kind of crafting was deliberate, too, because the creator has talked about working to avoid those tropes. I struggle to remember another time I had the opportunity to grieve for a queer character like they're a human being, without the implication that it's queerness itself that's a death sentence.
And honestly? It feels good. It feels like a form of catharsis I do not dislike. That I'm maybe kinda glad for. OFMD is and stays a magical world. Beyond that, in a show full of queers, one of them dies after getting some extraordinarily meaningful happiness, and it's peaceful, and I get to just be sad for the fucker without the gutting of being reminded that if you're gay, better not shoot too high. It feels like a completely different emotion that no other show, for now, would give me, but OFMD. To me, it's yet another thing it's pulled off.
As it's been known to do.
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hiya speeps! love your mods and videos, they have fueled my sonic hyperfixations very well! anyway, in one of your older videos you briefly mentioned how sa1 having cutscenes play over top of gameplay was why characters could "make faces" in that game but not sa2. could you go into more detail as to why this is?
In SA1 the cutscenes are done like an RPGMaker event, it has a library of event-specific functions to control characters/objects etc. and forms a list of them as one big script.
Here's an example from one of Sonic's events:
Here's what a few of them do:
EV_MovePoint2: Move a character to coordinates with specified speed and acceleration. There's also a simpler, less used version called EV_MovePoint that does the same thing but at a fixed speed.
EV_SetAction: Give an object an action (Model+Animation) and textures. You can also specify the speed of the animation, whether it loops and (if another EV_SetAction is playing) how many frames to interpolate to this animation from the previous one. (Think every time Sonic moves his hands around while he says "Ah Yeah this is Happenin'", that uses it)
EV_SetFace: Give a character a list of preset facial animations to do (Each letter in the string corresponds to one) . It only works on Sonic, Tails, Knuckles, Amy and Tikal - no other character has faces. (Except for Big, but the game will do an out of bounds crash since he only has 6 faces instead of 20)
EV _Wait: Pause the event thread for X frames.
Here's some others that aren't in that image:
EV_CreateObject: Creates a blank object, usually used for props by giving them an appearance with EV_SetAction.
EV_PlayPad: Plays back recorded user input, Sonic Team used this whenever they wanted Sonic to jump or do a spindash.
While this way can make everything look stiff at times, it's pretty flexible and easy to play with in a mod. It's also why the game has 8 character slots and why Eggman, Tikal and event ZERO are technically player characters.
The best part about it is that the two aren't mutually exclusive, you can call anything from an event in during gameplay and vice versa, the game does this itself a few times too, like setting a flag that keeps the hint monitors active for the Twinkle Park scene.
The faces are part of the characters themselves and they'll switch to them at any time if the relevant values are changed, so I managed to figure out how to do it in the Dreamcast version in 2017. (Funnily enough, also August).
As I said above with EV_SetFace, there's only 20 faces to hold up the entire game's dialogue with (even fewer in actuality given the ones either reserved for blinking or unused) and they seem to be focused more on expression than speaking, at least for Sonic and Knuckles, which is why a lot of people find them goofy.
There's only one situation the game uses the animations for outside cutscenes - when the player gets hurt, they'll do one of their screaming animations for a few frames. (There's also a funny issue where Sonic does it after hitting Knuckles in his boss fight)
Anyway, you can call any event animation, any face and even spawn event objects (such as Chaos event actors) whenever you want in that game. Usually the only thing they need is their textures loaded.
Here's a few things I did when I first figured out how to do it:
SA2's cutscenes are full 3D animations (like Blender) in the game's event folder, everything in them is entirely separate to the gameplay stuff, so the in-game characters have no mouths or cutscene-specific animations to play around with.
It meant they didn't need to deal with gameplay limitations (like player physics) and were easier for them to test as they have a fixed timeline rather than relying on in-game sequences to fall into place.
They also had much greater control over character expressions. The mouth and head are separated and they aren't limited to the list of 20 faces. Here's a bunch I dug out a few years ago for Amy's brow alone:
They used to be really annoying to edit (I had to use a Hex Editor) but I think the SA2 Modding community has had breakthroughs since. Still, I suck at 3D modelling so I prefer SA1's.
I decompiled all of SADX PC's event scripts a few years ago so if you want to learn exactly what they do (and change them, as it's in mod form) take a look:
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It's totally fine if you don't think God!Gale and Ascended!Astarion endings are necessarily bad endings. I agree there's definitely some ambiguity when it comes to these outcomes, but there's something that people should consider:
When writing a character, one of the things a writer can choose to focus on to build them out is to consider What They Want vs. What They Need.
Gale WANTS to become a god (eventually) to both show up Mystra and to help mortals the way he feels that gods should. What Gale NEEDS is to realise that he is enough as is, that he is more than just his power and any more strength he could aqcuire. Gale needs to have more confidence in his own self worth.
Astarion WANTS ultimate power so that no can ever hurt him or those he loves ever again. He wants to be so strong that no one would even try to harm him, and if they do he can effortlessly squash them. For him, it's only through power that he can ever be truly and forever free. What Astarion NEEDS is healing from centuries of cruelty through true friendship or even romantic love and to be seen as an equal, to take back control of his bodily autonomy and choices, and to become actually free from not only Cazador, but from becoming a slave to his darkest impulses that his rough life has exacerbated.
Sure, both Gale and Astarion are happy when they get what they want, but there's lots of hints that it's not what they really needed.
Gale becomes the god of ambition, which is never satisfied with its lot and will likely cause trouble for the pantheon down the line. It's also very clear that he lost a vital part of himself, and I don't think it's his connection with his mother or Tara, which are still important facets but are ultimately not the core of what he lost. It's the fact that he no longer cares about doing actual good for people, a key component of his former personality. One of the things I love about his character is that no matter how high he rose, mortal Gale still cared about helping people in positive ways. Ambition doesn't give a damn where its drive takes people, for better or for worse. Mortal Gale would be horrified if he knew that he influenced evil people to do worse things in the name of ambition. Mortal Gale would also be horrified that his god version openly admits to not offering ANYTHING to his followers, which is anathema to what Gale originally wanted godhood for. But hey, he got what he wants and he's happy, so that MUST be good, right?
Ascended Astarion has entirely lost any shred of his humanity, and is now a complete slave to his darkest desires. He no longer views his romantic partner as a person. They're just his most prized object, whether they want to be or not. He enslaves other people, inflicting on them the exact kind of bondage he had to deal with for two centuries, including the person he used to love. On top of all that, he loses his capacity to even recognize the wrongness of his actions. For all intents and purposes, Ascended Astarion becomes a megalomaniacal homicidal psychopath who's hunger knows no bounds. Worse, he has no way to ever recognise if this is a problem anymore or something he doesn't like. But again, he got what he wants and he's happy, so it MUST be a good thing, right?
There's nothing wrong if you still see these outcomes as good endings, or even just better endings than an outright "bad" ending. I see what you mean, and also, it's a video game and these are fictional characters, not people who can actually get hurt. Like so much media and art, it's really more of a thought experiment than any kind of moral indicator.
I do however implore you to consider why so many people, Larian included, don't see these outcomes as good, and in some ways perhaps even worse than other "bad" endings. A very common but very relevant trope in storytelling is "be careful what you wish for because you might just get it", and it's usually to remind us that getting what we want isn't always what's best for us in the long run.
#bg3#baldur's gate 3#bg3 gale#bg3 spoilers#gale dekarios#gale of waterdeep#astarion#bg3 astarion#storytelling
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Something that I find misses the point so completely it is breathtaking is when people are like "this player hates engaging with their backstory" about the CR cast. It's pretty much never true, and what's worst is that I've seen it the most about Travis and Taliesin, two of the players who I think have the strongest grasp on how to create and engage with a backstory.
The choice to have a character who avoids elements of their past can be a valid, informed, and deliberate character choice. People run from their pasts! People decide not to pursue things for a number of reasons - because it hurts too much, because they're scared to know the answer, because they think the people around them don't care, and because their interests change. Caduceus very much is an avoidant character. He has access to Sending by the time we first meet him, and he never uses it to try to contact his family. That's not Taliesin being stupid or avoiding. That's Caduceus making a conscious choice to not ask the question "is my family dead" because he is terrified the answer is yes. He waits for a concrete sign to go after his family to the point of deep loneliness and self-harm out of this fear. That's a crucial trait that you need to understand him as a character! Ashton is also on some level similar in that he engages in no shortage of harmful, wallowing, and self-indulgent behaviors - and that is a choice. They also have obviously messy feelings about the Hishari and it's pretty plain to see they feel extremely conflicted about their growing bonds with Bells Hells because now they'll feel bad if Bells Hells leaves them. So of course he's hesitant to bring this to Orym, because then he's entrusted Orym with this information, and he has to care, and again, this is a major part of who Ashton is.
The same goes with Fjord and Vandran (and Sabian). One of the core themes of Fjord's story is deciding whether to run from or embrace your past, and which parts of that past you want to bring forward as you change, which means that to explore that, he has to do some running! He makes efforts to learn more about where they are (going to search for Vandran during the Zadash downtime; hiring a bounty hunter for Sabian) but those get interrupted by Fjord's shifting feelings about Vandran, and fact that this is an ensemble and the story naturally shifts.
Which brings us to the practical element. Fjord doesn't want to release Uk'otoa at the time, so it makes sense to return to the mainland and process next steps, and the focus of the story then turns to rescuing Yeza, and then finding Yasha, and rescuing Caduceus's family, and changing Veth back, and brokering peace, and TravelerCon, and Eiselcross. Through this, he still in fact does quite a lot of backstory work (changing patrons and taking a paladin oath, asking Jester to contact Vandran), as well as an immense amount of character growth and engagement with the ongoing story, but Travis doesn't wrench everything off its natural course just to check off every box on Fjord's list, because that would be selfish, obnoxious, and not fun to watch. And Caduceus achieves exactly what he set out to do! He found and rescued his family and found a way to hold off the corruption! Despite his avoidance, he covers all the bases! And as for Ashton...we've had precious little time to cover anyone's backstory in depth other than Imogen's, and we've actually seen a decent amount of Ashton's backstory regardless with their contacts in Bassuras and their interactions with Jiana. There simply was not time in Bassuras to stray from the main objectives and search for the Nobodies, and I think if we had people would be annoyed since that arc already took a very long time (and, for what it's worth, rather like Fjord, Ashton has explicitly asked after The Nobodies. Do not mistake lack of payoff for character disinterest).
It is, to me, incredibly telling this criticism is most commonly seen about the two players who I think also get the most "well they had an central arc/more focus than my fave" criticism.There's no way to make everyone in the fandom happy, and I think Travis and Taliesin are the players at the table who most understand that and give the least fucks about what the fandom thinks, and who (possibly relatedly) have some of the strongest grasps of narrative and what it means to play in an ensemble. Which is in my opinion a major factor in why their characters are so good - even the ones I do not vibe with are fully realized and well-crafted, because the players are not trying to make likeable characters, but rather interesting ones, and they're not trying to take center stage, but rather be generous at the table.
#critical role#meta#truly as a fan i say fuck fandom wishes. if you're a good enough creator you'll make me like something i didn't know i would.#also lbh the fjord criticism is like 99.9% from people salty that travis did NOT lose interest in the character and had fjord romance jeste#they're like yeah he was CLEARLY checked out but it's wishful thinking. they wish he had been and they're furious he wasn't.#this also reminds me of the accursed Suvi w/o the imperialism art i've mentioned#the character was designed to engage with the idea of empire and someone raised within it. you have given her an icepick lobotomy#it's also like. sometimes backstory is a hook. sometimes it's just there to inform the present. it's okay if it's the latter!
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Hi, can you write something about the readers of the meta-human, whose ability allows you to avoid the actions of any platonic yandere, be it the Avengers or Bucky. Maybe the reader blows up everything around when one of them approaches, or hurts himself with his ability, thinking that this will make them leave, but the opposite is true. I especially like the idea of having an extremely painful reader who is already injured quite often, but the ability causes pain too. You choose the character yourself, but I'd prefer Bucky and Steve.
Hi, thank you for requesting! I stucky with just Bucky and Steve for this <3
Tw: Yanderes themes + non-detailed mentions of SH (^^)
You being easily injured already sets off alarm bells in their head, and it’s probably the reason they became obsessive in the first place.
-Steve is very aware of how it feels to be injured most of the time, after all he spent his years being beaten up in alleyways, and he wouldn’t call it fun.
-He wouldn't like the idea of you being sent out missions.
-It’s bad enough with your sheer (and frankly shockingly) bad luck with collecting bruises just at the tower.
-Sending you out into an active fighting zone will only allow worse to happen.
He thinks you’re being exploited, used, by the others for your powers.
-The fact they’re willingly sending you out, knowing the pain it causes, because it helps them?
-He’s constantly bringing it up in meetings, arguing against your involvement.
-He may even threaten to leave the team himself if they don’t take it seriously enough.
Bucky would try to appeal to you more when trying to get you off the team.
-He doesn’t know the others well enough to fight with them like Steve, but he has very similar thoughts about the situation.
-When a mission is coming up, he’ll try his best to hide it from you by taking up most of your time, asking you to explain some new modern technology to him (even if he already knows).
-If you brush him off, he’ll become more overbearing about it, flat out telling you ‘no’ and that you’re not going.
-He doesn’t like you being mad at him, but he he can deal with it if it means you aren’t coming back hurt and exhausted.
Their persistence, even if some of it is valid, pushes you further away from them - to the point you try everything you can to convivence them to leave.
Destruction is something they can deal with.
-Sure, they obviously preferred if you didn’t (since it means they now have to replace it despite being broke) but it’s only materialistic objects at the end of the day (Steve is desperately trying to justify everything you do).
-They’d probably give you a not very stern warning but overall try to give you just a bit more space.
-They’d act more like tired parents with a misbehaving toddler than view it as an actual threat.
On the other hand, hurting yourself is not.
-If they think you’re doing this for reasons unrelated to them (because they couldn’t face the truth and blamed it on something else), they’d ignore any complaints from you and drag you to therapy.
-You’ll be kicked off the team, watched more closely, banned from using your powers (not that can really stop you completely), etc, etc.
-They’d have some sort of daily check-up where they try to force you into talking about your feelings and learn better copying mechanisms.
If they become aware of how you’re doing this because you want them to leave, they’d be conflicted.
-They obviously don’t like that you jumped to this idea and it really makes them re-think their actions for a while.
-But, you were being harmed before this as well - were they really supposed to do nothing?
They’d turn this into a reason to become even more suffocating.
-They’re set on helping you, whether you want it or not, and this just proves you to them you need someone to look out for you.
-If you’re willing to go to such extents now, how do they know you won’t again?
You obviously don’t understand the full extent of your powers - the painful consequences and ways people could manipulate them - but, don't worry, they'll make sure you never have to <3
I know SH is a sensitive topic regardless of context and I tried not to overstep any boundaries when writing this. However, if there is any issues here in how it was portrayed, please feel free to message me <3
#RemotePixel#platonic yandere#yandere mcu#yandere marvel#yandere Steve Rogers#platonic yandere Steve Rogers#yandere Bucky Barnes#platonic yandere Bucky Barnes
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Okay so I'm stepping out of my fandom lane a tad here because I just watched the season 2 finale of Leverage: Redemption and had some thoughts and feelings about Eliot Spencer as concerning the concept of "redemption" and whether you CAN be "redeemed" for certain things or not and how you can live your life if you can't.
Eliot in this latest episode says point blank that he cannot and will never be redeemed for some of the things he's done in his past. We as the audience have never really been told all of what he's done, we've been given bits and pieces every so often, just enough to perhaps lead us to our own conclusions of what he might have done, but it's never been spelled out. Which is fine, it actually increases the impact of what it is he may have done in his past if it's left in the shadows, just ambiguous enough for the audience to insert their own worst nightmares to fill in the blanks.
But what he also says is that he's made his peace with the fact that he'll never truly be redeemed for what he's done, he's okay with that. Because while he's alive, he can make himself useful to genuinely good people. He can help these other people who have also chosen to be better and have perhaps FOUND whatever redemption they may have needed at doing good for innocent victims in the world. He can take the skills he once only used to hurt people and instead use them to help people, to bring them peace and comfort and joy. He can DO GOOD THINGS, he can even do them for the rest of his life, but there's never going to be a count of people he's helped, lives he's saved, that will undo the hurt he's done or the lives he's TAKEN. Nothing will give those people back their lives, nothing will give their loved ones back that person they lost, he can't give back the time he stole from them.
Eliot can be loved, both by people who knew him before and people who know him after. Eliot can be a wonderful person that the audience roots for and adores. Eliot is not toxic or unreasonable or selfish in any of his relationships. But he can't be redeemed for what he's done, and THAT'S OKAY. Nothing about Eliot being a good person requires his redemption and I think that sometimes redemption gets confused with that. The person Eliot is saying all of this to in this particular episode tries to reassure him that of COURSE he's also been redeemed, but he's not saying he's not currently a good person who is doing good things. He's not saying that he isn't a better person than he was before or that the good choices he's making now don't matter. He's just recognizing that he's done enough evil in his life, enough objectively horrific things for objectively horrific and selfish people, that cannot be undone.
Most of the other characters in this show have been selfish, yes, have hurt people and done bad things, but as far as I remember none of them have KILLED anyone. And this show, via Eliot, places that as an ultimate evil beyond redemption. The other characters can find redemption by using their criminal skills to help the disenfranchised who are being abused and taken advantage of by the system. They could potentially even try to help some of the people they've hurt in the past, undo some of the damage they've done. Eliot can't. Which means there's no redemption to be found when there's not even any amends he can make for his choices in the past, there's no one left to make amends to.
And I LOVE Eliot, Eliot is brave and smart and funny and kind and great with kids and sensitive and loving. He's a brilliant cook who uses food to show people he loves them, he's an unparalleled fighter who refuses to use guns because of how lethal they are, he's an insanely observant person with a ridiculously good memory, he's stubborn and protective and understanding. Eliot is a wonderful person and a wonderful character.
And he CANNOT BE REDEEMED. There is NO redemption for Eliot Spencer because there are things he's done that cannot be undone, and THAT'S OKAY.
#leverage#leverage redemption#eliot spencer#being unredeemable does not necessarily mean they can't be BETTER#being unredeemable does not necessarily mean they can't be a GOOD PERSON#but choosing to make better choices and be a better person also does not automatically make them redeemed#if what they've done is pretty objectively and irrevocably evil#i'll put this in the tags because i'm tagging this with leverage's tags but y'all know this is about anakin#anakin cannot be redeeemed#he'll never truly find redemption even if he survived
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iwould like to hear your rant about lmk wukong's character assassination. In detail. if possible. please
(takes long drag of cigarette) it really did all start with the show itself coming out. see, after ROTTMNT came out, i don't think we could really expect flying bark to be "faithful" to its IPs and while whether that was a good thing for the TMNT franchise is absolutely something that can be discussed by people that aren't me, it's a whole lot more sensitive when you're handling a show based on a cultural treasure -
LEGO's line of toys dedicated to a sort of journey of the west spinoff is, in my opinion, an objectively good idea. other than boosting sales it feels kind of inevitable considering just how much LNY stuff they'd put out already, you know? to put it simply i don't have any problems with the lego monkie kid IP in concept, just with the way FB decided to run with its execution -- which ended up landing it squarely in "hot mess" territory.
basically - and i promise that this is relevant to wukong specifically, bear with me - i think that the first red flags were the fixation on their rendition of the six-eared macaque: a character that they've changed from being a single-use "evil twin" character that served the original Journey to the West's allegory for enlightenment (ie. that he was a manifestation of SWK's worst impulses) and then immediately fucking died when the situation called for it. he didn't show up for more than one storyline. they retcon a looooot of SWK's actual backstory as detailed by the book itself in order to make room for sadboy LEMH content so the writers could get their shipfix for him and SWK (which is annoying on more than one point, if you remember what I said about the evil twin thing. if you catch my drift. average flying bark moment)
but to put it simply i genuinely think they just made him... way too much of a lazy fucking self absorbed asshole? the beginning of the show has this which feels like a one-off gag but they double down on it later which makes they didn't write sun wukong -- this is after he's supposed to have ascended to victorious-in-strife buddha, mind you, and it ends up feeling less like sun wukong at any point in the storyline and more like... well, goku. from dragon ball super. which is its own, mostly unrelated can of worms in and of itself.
the thing is this is a character that's been used historically as an allegory, as representative of the people, objectively a cultural icon no matter where in china-influenced asia you find yourself (fantastic analysis of the problem with the way LMK pays homage to that allegory here), and also used in reference to, like, diaspora kids. this is a character that baaasically any chinese person with any kind of connection to the culture is going to see themselves in - especially in his reckless identity and subsequent ascension, you know?
and the main problem here is essentially that when you do this with a character that exsits as part of a media franchise... it's fine? it's whatever. people can just skip that. but when you are doing this as an attempt to adapt a piece of historically and culturally important literature - one that is made for children, one that is infinitely more accessible to diaspora children of that culture than any other adaptation that would be directed towards their age demographic, it feels like a punch in the gut. it's a level of disrespect that just really really hurts, all because the people in charge of it feel like they have to flanderize their characters for their fandom or they'll, like, die.
this isn't exactly organized nor is it every thought i have on the matter but basically tldr they forgot they were writing sun wukong and not their oc
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I've been thinking a lot about Plan 99. Most of the fandom has, whether we want to or not, because how do you stop thinking about it honestly? Now I've been riding the Tech's Alive train from the start, for a lot of reasons - I won't list them all out, because there's been some absolutely amazing meta on the topic. Shout out to @heyclickadee especially who's done some in depth posts about Tech's probable survival that I cannot recommend enough.
But the thing that I can't stop coming back to and turning over in my hands like a shiny object is the thought of physically disabled Tech. It's a storyline that I think is underrepresented in media, as well as a choice that preserves the narrative stakes while being reason enough for the cast and writers to get as emotional as they did discussing it during the panel. And, frankly, it's a realistic outcome. There's this tendency to hold up character death as the ultimate demonstration of realism in a narrative based around war, but for every soldier that never came home there's a soldier that made it back with permanent injuries that changed their life forever.
But what I'm especially focused on is how it all ties together with the narrative themes that we've seen through the show, and that have been especially prominent in season two. Tech coming back with a permanent disability, especially one that removes him from the field in some way, fits in perfectly with several things.
The first one is of course survival as a whole - we get a lot of focus on this, and the most notable moment is with Crosshair and the ice vulture. "They find a way to survive" and all. But while it's most prominent in Crosshair's storyline, it's not absent from the rest of the batch's narrative. We see their determination to survive, Tech most especially. Episode two is basically an ongoing demonstration of how hard he's able to go even when he can barely move, and we get that long focus on him when the line "I'm a survivor" comes in. Then we get episode four, which is entirely focused on his quick thinking, his unique processing, and how it helps him survive where literally any other human would have been killed.
Tech is a calculated risk taker, but he's a survivor. If anyone could make it through that fall he could, tying his plot in rather firmly with Crosshair's journey through that shared narrative of finding a way to survive.
Which brings us to our next major theme - choices, respecting them and, especially, living with the consequences of your own. Tech made a choice, he looked at the odds and chose to risk himself to protect his family. If he dies here, that's it, that's as far as he has to go and it's up to everyone else to live with his choice and his loss. The consequences of that decision become theirs to bear.
But, if he lives, if he's permanently affected by his choice, then not only are they dealing with the consequences but so is he. Dying is a single choice, living with permanent changes is a series of them. Coming to the conclusion that despite everything he doesn't regret any of it, that he'd do it all again to protect them is a choice too. All of which leads directly into a theme that was most notably laid down by Tech himself in The Crossing - the ability and need to adapt.
If Tech becomes injured enough that he can't go into the field, that's a major shakeup in the fabric of the team as well as his own self image. From the start, Tech has always been elbow deep in the missions. He's in thick of the fight, right there dual wielding to take down enemies, smacking droids with datapads, hacking, and he gets several points where he physically saves Omega. He's not a sidelines kind of nerd.
So what happens if he can't do that? Maybe he's hurt enough that he has to actually stay behind on Pabu permanently, maybe he can go with them and pilot but he can't leave the Marauder, either way how does he handle being put in a situation where he can't be what he was before on the team and they have to go into danger without him there to protect them or help? The team has to adjust to his absence, and he has to adjust to not being able to do Everything and fill every gap. He has to adjust to watching them leave, not knowing if they'll come back.
But they have to adapt. He has to adapt. That's what soldiers do.
Except he's not even a soldier anymore, not in the same way, he might still be a mechanic and a pilot, but he's not the soldier he used to be, and that's another narrative theme hit. Who are the clones when they can't be soldiers? What else can they do, what are their lives without war and fighting? If Tech can't do what he did before, what can he do, how can he help his family, who even is he outside of the role that was given to him?
The final theme that I think ties into this - the second season has put a real emphasis on culture and community, we see communities coming together to support each other in multiple episodes such as with the wookiees, the rescued miner kids, Pabu as a whole. And Tech dealing with the changes that new disability brings provides ample opportunity to see that community support in action.
Pabu is a village of refugees, people who have likely gone through exactly what he's going through. His living would give the opportunity to explore that further and provide yet another link between the Batch and Pabu, another example of their belonging. He can't be as self sustaining as he was before. He doesn't have to be. None of them do, they have a community now and it's okay to lean on them.
I keep coming back to Tribe, too, specifically that quote that got us all right in the heart. When a young one leaves, the trees weep. But when they return the trees sing. As this child has found his new home, perhaps, one day we all will find a new path.
At the time a lot of us thought about Crosshair. Now we can connect it very directly to Omega's kidnapping. Two lost young ones that the trees will sing for when they return. Hopefully we get to see that with Tech too. We've definitely had our weeping, so fingers crossed for some singing to come.
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hi im just gonna put my thoughts on every clone high ship i can think of here
jfgogh - i think its cute. i can definitely see jfk like uplifting gogh and him falling in love over like the most basic display of kindness and jfk just being like “haha woah there guy i didnt mean it like that” but then he realises he Does
gogh x gandhi - LOTS of mixed feelings on this one but it is pretty interesting truth be told. like, the way gogh didnt just sit back and take what gandhi did to him and instead retaliated, i like that, i like the thought of two tiny guys having the most unnecessarily intense rivalry ever, but i know that isn’t really the way the ship is portrayed often rather than wholesome stuff . you interpret ships however you want though
gfk i think is the name for it - im so sorry as a gandhabe connoisseur i know how annoying it is when people say this about a ship that absolutely entraps you but i think jfk and gandhi are more accurate together as just silly friends who see eachother like once a month. jfk casually brings up a girl hes dating (or rather just having sex with frequently) and gandhi is like wait what happened to the other one? like hes very out of the loop but he listens and they both hype eachother up a lot
ceasgogh, gogh x christo, ceaser x christo, whether it’s any of those seperately or polyamory - i love this one so very much for literally no reason. maybe its like a nostalgia thing cuz i remember people talking about them sometimes in 2020 and being like Aw that’s cute but idk something about them feels so like. objectively correct. like yep that’s the little background trio standing together in an episode as they should be
abefk i think - i like it!! even though it’s barely known apart from jokingly i really like the classic 2000s rivalry between a nice boy and an asshole jock thing that was going on between them before ponce’s death, i admit i miss their interactions. i miss how theyd refer to eachother with their last names. also the part in season 2 episode 6 where they both were recalling memories of the grassy knoll and abe went “i used to get food thrown at me” and jfk continued “i used to be the one throwing that food”. i like them
joanabe - i know this one is like barely a ship but i still need to talk about them badly. their friendship is so important to me. the way its always been them whether it’s joan crushing on abe or the other way around, they’re just so special to eachother in any and every way, and both struggle with the choice of helping the other or doing things that hurt the other but ultimately raise their chances of getting together. tbh im so interested in whats gonna happen with them in the finale, and in the next seasons bc i doubt their back and forth crush thing is gonna last the ENTIRE show like itll be getting a new sort of premise or main character focus which im excited for
joanfk - some of the fanart is absolutely adorable COUGH COUGH ORT SMORT COUG but its just not for me man. biggest two factors as to why i dislike it being how it overtook the fandom, and how to me they just never had any substance. they have a fun dynamic and the season 1 finale was sweet but idk it just never affected me that much. also bc i always knew it was gonna crash and burn. like that is not a stable couple as cute as it is sometimes. like at all. and im happy episode 7 finally addressed it
abe x cleo - again, not really a fondly talked about ship, but they are pretty dear to me. it’s the way cleo was clearly playing with abe at the start but actually saw the charm in him and was actually upset when he finally digested his feelings for joan… i really hope they’re gonna be good friends in the future bc episode 7 seemed to be sort of a start for that friendship and them learning to be ok around eachother after the finale…
joan x cleo - ive always been scared to talk about this one bc some people see them as sisters, which i Really dont. they never acted in a sisterly way at all, and the living together thing lasted for like what. one episode. so i doubt it had any affect on how they view their relationship. but again absolutely fair if it makes you uncomfortable for this reason! but yeah i do like them. very very good trope and there can be some really cute stuff done with them dynamic wise
gandhabe my heart and soul my romeo and juliet my sun and moon my red and blue - AUGHGGGGG MY ALL TIME FAVOURITE. EVER. IN THE WHOLE SHOW FOR EVER they just have such sweet interactions and everything they do they do with the other in mind and i want them to have an emotional reunion in the season 3 finale sO SHRGFRHRVRRRRR RR RBR R R R. RR R. sorry this is mostly incoherent screaming rather than actual words I just DUCIGJGN LVOE GANDHABEEEEE EEYEHEEE THEYRE END GAME!! THEY ARE END GAME WHETHER ITS AS FRIENDS OR ROMANTICALLY RHEY ARE THE ONES
ok now onto the ones involving the new gen clones
harriucius - i like them its the second het ship in the show ive ever actually liked!! they just both go so well in so many ways, they both have almost the exact same struggles and cope in similar ways, but harriet has more of a hands on attitude with her problems, while confucius tends to avoid things. im VERY interested in how their relationship will go and i dont really think anything’s gonna happen to them bc i cant picture the show pairing either of them up with anyone else (mostly confucius tbh 😭)
joanharriet - i WISH this one was more acknowledged by the fandom like i think its the least popular one at least involving the newbies.. can you tell im a sucker for ships that are literally just two close friends who love eachother more than anything. lol. when i think of them i think of episode 5 which makes me extremely happy. like look me in the eyes and tell me that was not an absolutely beautiful wonderfully wrapped episode
johnfucius - gonna be honest i dont like this one. i know this is a really rich thing to say while talking about clone high season 2 but it just felt rushed, and especially with how they barely did anything after sleepover. like they were literally crying both of them being like OMG I FINALLY HAVE A FRIEND!! and then they proceed to have the most stale interactions with the most notable one being in the next episode and it’s literally just confucius encouraging jfk to avoid his problems like he does. not really good. but again if you enjoy them all the power to you, im happy you found something you like that hasn’t been ruined and seems pretty docile and chill compared to all the other ones :o) it’s very much a mostly fandom based ship
kahlopatra - BEAUTIFUL. BEAUTIFUL. I HAVE NO WORDS JUST BEAUTIFUL. there definitely was a lack of suspense like based off the intro and the slight buildup throughout the series BUT that literally doesn’t matter. out of every canon couple they are the absolute cutest im obsessed with the effect they have on eachother. especially on cleos side of things like ahhh!!!! she found someone she actually connects to genuinely!!!! i am so happy for her!!!!!!
tophucius - not much about this one its just pretty fun and silly . i feel bad for the people who thought something big was gonna be going on w them but the small details peppered in about them in sleepover were nice. i always liked how when confucius saw that topher typed your instead of you’re, he went “i thought so” like to me that confirms they do this all the time and they know it’s them. also really funny to imagine them being sworn enemies online but when they actually see eachother in school theyre Like oh shit hey man what’s up! hope youre well! like not even through gritted teeth or anything they’re just so chill irl for no reason
abetoph - Sigh i sure did save this one for last. while im a lot less comfortable with it now i still love thinking of them pre episode 8 and i do think their relationship is just ever so slightly more interesting now with the added double crossing n shit added to it. but im also sad they’ll never be the way they were may 24th to june 14th again . that specific time period of them is so comforting to me for no reason, all the memes and running jokes in the fandom involving them, all the wholesome fan work of them sleeping in tophers bed, watching stuff on tophers computer together, abe being tophers voice of the reason and the one person he actually likes, it’s just so … man. We Could Have Had It All. i love them for ever.
thank you so much for listening
#i also want to write an essay on why abe is autistic#clone high#clone high van gogh#clone high jfk#clone high gandhi#clone high julius caesar#clone high christo#abe lincoln#clone high joan#clone high cleo#clone high harriet#clone high confucius#clone high frida#topher bus#gandhabe#abetoph#clone high spoilers#mine
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Omniscient Reader's Viewpoint Is An Action Adventure Romance Love Story
Omniscient Reader's Viewpoint became a Romance with Action and Adventure the moment this line appeared –
「 Incarnation Kim Dokja will be killed by the person he loves most. 」
Kim Dokja loving Yoo Joonghyuk became canon to me the moment –
「 Incarnation Kim Dokja will be killed by the person he loves most. 」
I don’t know why people deny it saying he’s straight or not gay, whether he’s gay or not he loves yoo joonghyuk???
People can argue it’s the story he loves most, but I think it’s both, it’s the story, and the person he loves the most.
I mean when discussing who he loves the most, they clearly mean it romantically, and Yoo Sangah who seems to like Dokja a little gets embarrassed when she thinks she’s the one he loves the most.
“No, you don’t think it is me…?”
What bullshit was this girl saying? Lee Jihye’s comment seemed to relax the party members.
Jung Heewon asked, “What? Did Dokja-ssi do something? That man, towards a minor…’
“No, that’s not it…”
“Then?”
“I just thought about it using common sense. I am a high school girl. Then he should like me…”
The party members ignored Lee Jihye and continued the discussion. It was Jung Heewon who gave her opinion first. “My guess is that Dokja-ssi’s most loved person is Yoo Sangah-ssi.”
“Huh?” Yoo Sangah was startled. She was so surprised that I was hurt. “Why me…?”
“It should be like this. In fact, Yoo Sangah-ssi’s beauty… well, I don’t need to mention it.”
The members nodded and Yoo Sangah’s face turned red.
Jung Heewon kept speaking. “You are running around everywhere to save Dokja-ssi… I honestly think it would be strange if Dokja-ssi doesn’t like Yoo Sangah-ssi.”
Certainly, there was no one who wouldn’t like Yoo Sangah. She was pretty, kind, had a good personality…
There was no denying it.
(But Kim Dokja just thinks of Yoo Sangah’s attractiveness and beauty objectively)
Yoo Sangah acted like it was difficult situation before she suddenly hit back at Jung Heewon. “I actually thought it was Heewon-ssi.”
“Uh…yes? Me?”
“Yes, I think that Dokja-ssi iikes Heewon-ssi.”
Jung Heewon was surprised by the unexpected counterattack and her eyes widened. Lee Hyunsung also jumped with shock. It was an interesting hypothesis for me as well.
“This… Dokja-ssi is really kind to Heewon-ssi. He gave you equipment and… Heewon-ssi seemed to smile very well when talking to Dokja-ssi…”
Certainly, there seemed to be such a thing. It was very easy for me to converse with Jung Heewon. It was in the sense that she was a ‘character’ I found and raised.
The confused Jung Heewon shook her hands with a flushed face. “Huh? No, wait a minute. That…”
They are clearly discussing Kim Dokja’s love in a romantic way, since both women got embarrassed.
There’s even a hint of it here:
Lee Gilyoung agonized over the question before starting to cry. No matter how I thought about it, I couldn’t find a reason why I would love him. Then Lee Hyunsung spoke. “Hum hum. Perhaps it is ‘comradeship…”
People simultaneously stared at Yoo Jonghyuk. Yoo Jonghyuk, who was standing with his arms crossed, frowned. “What are you looking at?”
Lee Jihye and Jung Heewon were whispering to each other.
“…Ah, perhaps.”
“Right? Isn’t this right?”
[The constellation ‘Demon-like Judge of Fire’ is nodding violently!]
Then this important part:
[The constellation who doesn’t yet have a name says he doesn’t love anyone.]
An unknown atmosphere covered the party members. Some were disappointed while some were excited. No, why were they so interested in the love life of others?
Jung Heewon said, “You have to say it precisely. There is no one ‘right now.’ According to fate, Dokja-ssi will surely love someone.”
Well… she wasn’t wrong. Jung Heewon continued speaking. “Then I will change the question. What type of style does Dokja-ssi like? Is it close to one of us?”
No, why should I tell them?
“I know you are wondering why you should answer but it is important to us. If Dokja-ssi likes one of us, we might be able to stop that fate.”
…It was slightly convincing. Fate was very powerful but as I said, it wasn’t inevitable. If I knew who I loved, I might be able to go against fate.
I felt sorry that the party members were so worried about my death. However…
[The constellation who doesn’t yet have a name isn’t sure.]
In the end, Jung Heewon was irritated. “Oh, why are you so frustrating?”
“Ahjussi, it’s fine to tell us! Is it the time to be polite?”
[The constellation who doesn’t yet have a name says there is no such thing.]
Damn, I had to use a lot of coins to send the indirect messages.
[The constellation who doesn’t yet have a name doesn’t know his heart.]
“Dokja-ssi really…”
[The constellation ‘Prisoner of the Golden Headband’ is interested in the new story.]
[The constellation ‘Secretive Plotter’ wonders about your choice.]
[The constellation ‘Abyssal Black Flame Dragon’ is glancing this way.]
[Many constellations are choking on sweet potatoes are your frustrating answer.]
Even the constellations were listening to our conversation.
[The constellation ‘Demon-like Judge of Fire’ is telling you not to deceive yourself on your heart.]
[Some constellations declare there is no one apart from the incarnation ‘Yoo Sangah.’]
[Some constellations support the incarnation ‘Shin Yoosung.’]
[Some constellations who love true friends support the incarnation ‘Lee Hyunsung.’]
…This was an utter mess.
‘loves the most’ is clearly proven to be meant romantically, at least to Kim Dokja:
[The constellation who doesn’t yet have a name says he doesn’t love anyone.]
An unknown atmosphere covered the party members. Some were disappointed while some were excited. No, why were they so interested in the love life of others?
Kim Dokja says why were they so interested in the love life of others, so he acknowledges it’s romantically
Jung Heewon said, “You have to say it precisely. There is no one ‘right now.’ According to fate, Dokja-ssi will surely love someone.”
Well… she wasn’t wrong.
And he even admits Jung Heewon wasn’t wrong in saying he will surely love someone, maybe wanting to realize who he’s in love with.
[The constellation who doesn’t yet have a name doesn’t know his heart.]
[The constellation ‘Demon-like Judge of Fire’ is telling you not to deceive yourself on your heart.]
And Uriel knows the one he loves the most is Yoo Joonghyuk, even if Kim Dokja doesn’t know then.
Jung Heewon became slightly nervous once it was time to use it. I was also tense. Why was I so nervous when I was finally getting to know my heart?
…It felt like I was naked. I felt really strange as I saw everyone focus on the Affection Reader. After a while…
It’s repeatedly said in this whole scene when Kim Dokja is honest for once, that he doesn’t know his own heart, he even said he was ‘finally getting to know my heart’, meaning he had no thoughts of romance before.
Finally, only Yoo Sangah and Yoo Jonghyuk were left.
“J-Jonghyuk-ssi first…”
“I have no intention of joking around.”
Interestingly, Yoo Sangah wanted Yoo Joonghyuk to be first. Even though he didn’t try the affection reader at all.
And then moreover there’s all this interaction with yoo joonghyuk and Han Sooyoung even says
Han Sooyoung bit her lips besides me. “When did you become so close to him? That psychopath…”
“We aren’t close.”
“You had a very trusting expression when you said those words?”
And let’s not forget Yoo Joonghyuk, the one Kim Dokja loves the most, was the one who received the prophecy from Yoo Sangah, it’s quite romantic.
“I need your help.”
“I told you not to get involved with me anymore. I rescued you at that time to repay my debt to Kim Dokja.”
“It is related to Kim Dokja-ssi.”
Yoo Jonghyuk’s killing intent slightly subsided. “What do you mean?”
The energy that was pressing down on her disappeared and Yoo Sangah opened her mouth. “In this scenario, Dokja-ssi is going to die.”
Kim Dokja would die? Yoo Jonghyuk laughed. “Kim Dokja is capable of resurrection. I thought I told you before but you must’ve not heard it.”
Yoo Jonghyuk could guess Kim Dokja’s abilities to a certain extent. It wasn’t an endless resurrection but Kim Dokja would be able to survive death a few more times. Thus, Kim Dokja’s life wouldn’t be threatened for the time being.
“He should’ve resurrected by now… you haven’t met him yet?”
This time, Yoo Sangah’s eyes shook. Still, she didn’t give in and spoke again.
“It’s not like that. If you leave it like this, Dokja-ssi will ‘really’ die.”
“…How do you know?”
“I saw it.”
“You saw it?”
The next moment, a giant thread appeared behind Yoo Sangah. It wasn’t a strand from Ariadne.
Looking closer, the thread wasn’t made of yarn. It was made of very small strings. The strings were made of countless stories. Yoo Jonghyuk knew the identity of the thread in the air that flowed like the giant fabric of fate.
He knew but couldn’t help feeling surprised. This was the symbol of the three goddesses of fate, the Moerae.
Yoo Jonghyuk thought about it. “You stole a prophecy from a constellation?”
Yoo Sangah gently nodded.
The enraged Yoo Jonghyuk shouted, “Do you know what you have done. Fate…”
“I know! That’s why I’m asking for help, Yoo Jonghyuk-ssi.”
Yoo Jonghyuk’s mind was complicated. The Moerae’s ‘fate’ wasn’t simple a power to see the future. Rather, it was a prophecy that came from ‘conclusions’ through ‘big data.’
The most reasonable future was predicted through a combination of countless stories. In this way, ‘fate’ wasn’t absolute and seemed like it could change, but this never happened.
So far, the prophecies of Olympus had never been wrong. Even Zeus, the lord of Olympus, couldn’t escape from his fate. It was because the moment a prophecy was made, the whole probability of Olympus was used to realize this fate.
“Please stop Kim Dokja-ssi. Otherwise…” Yoo Sangah couldn’t finish her words. The sparks around her body blocked her mouth.
However, Yoo Jonghyuk could clearly read the strings behind her.
「 Incarnation Kim Dokja will be killed by the person he loves most. 」
Like, the one thought to be the female lead, Yoo Sangah, gives The Fated Prophecy Of Love for the main character to Yoo Joonghyuk the second male lead and it's like Yoo Joonghyuk is actually the Female lead (not Yoo Sangah).
And then most of all, Dokja practically confesses.
「 Incarnation Kim Dokja will be killed by your most loved one. 」
To be honest, it was a confusing story for me.
The person I loved most… They were going to kill me?
I hesitated before telling the contents of the prophecy and Han Sooyoung opened her mouth. As if she didn’t know what to say, her face paled and then reddened.
“The person you love most?”
“Yes.”
“…Do you have such a person?”
I felt bad but somehow, I also wanted to ask this. I tried to recall the faces of every person. There was some affection but there was no one I ‘loved.’ Indeed, ‘love’ was the word that was furthest from my life.
“To be honest, I would say there isn’t one.”
Han Sooyoung’s face became redder at my words. “Then shouldn’t the fate be withdrawn?”
“At first glance, you might think so…”
“Or are you going to fall in love with someone now? Are you the type to fall in love at first sight?”
“That has never happened and it isn’t likely.”
The fate message was strong enough to be repeated three times. I was confused. Had I fallen in love with someone?
This part here
I was confused. Had I fallen in love with someone?
This is Kim Dokja practically confessing that he didn’t know he fell in love with Yoo Joonghyuk.
This makes sense, yeah he’s a guy in denial and all that but he seemed honest at this part, I mean it’s about his fate, his death, he should be honest at this part. And it makes sense because he was lonely and emotionally abused in his life, he probably had never fallen in love with anyone or thought he could, so when he falls in love with someone, he doesn’t recognize it, especially if that someone happens to be his favourite character of his most loved novel.
Then right after the conversation of who Kim Dokja loves the most, and that he doesn’t know who he loves, this happens
“That guy should be sent…”
At this moment, a message appeared in the air.
[Someone in Dark Castle has achieved the first transcendence in the scenario!]
It was as I expected. I thought he would’ve reached that position by now.
I thought about Yoo Jonghyuk, who should be causing a disaster in the distance. “Now the main character should pay for his meal.”
Han Sooyoung bit her lips besides me. “When did you become so close to him? That psychopath…”
“We aren’t close.”
“You had a very trusting expression when you said those words?”
“You are mistaken. I trust the dokkaebis more than I do him.”
And then Kim Dokja says this
If I believed in Yoo Jonghyuk, it was in his experience, not his personality. This was a guy with three times the experience and he learnt various types of information from the 41st round Shin Yoosung.
Furthermore, Paradise was originally his main responsibility. He took care of it well in the second regression so he should do better this time. Just…
“…I’m a bit worried.”
Yoo Joonghyuk’s name comes up. And yeah, Kim Dokja doesn’t know he loves Yoo Joonghyuk.
He says he believes in Yoo Joonghyuk’s experience, but he got worried.
I couldn’t be completely relieved because I didn’t trust his personality. I had made various preparations for the party members to attack Paradise but I couldn’t be perfect.
I was a reader, not a reader, and Yoo Jonghyuk was a regressor sunfish. I hope he felt a lot better since his last psychotic break…
He contradicts himself in practically the same time and says he doesn’t trust Yoo Joonghyuk because of his personality, it just sounds like an excuse of some sort, especially when he says he hoped he felt a lot better since his last psychotic break, it’s just care and love for Yoo Joonghyuk without himself even knowing. And he’s so worried (despite believing in yoo joonghyuk’s experience) he goes to watch.
Yoo Jonghyuk’s calm eyes shook at my words.
Who would’ve known at the time? Me and this guy, we would actually end up as companions. I hadn’t wanted to admit it but now I had to. The things that hadn’t seemed possible became reality. I was actually going through the scenarios with him.
That’s why I could now say it. Just like I did when I first met him on Han River Bridge. This was the way that suited us best.
“Release your hand and get lost, you damn son of a bitch.”
He even finally admits that he’s companions with Yoo Joonghyuk, like he’s more immersed in reality, but of course he doesn’t know completely he’s in love with Yoo Joonghyuk, and emotionally represses his emotions again:
That’s why I could now say it. Just like I did when I first met him on Han River Bridge. This was the way that suited us best.
“Release your hand and get lost, you damn son of a bitch.”
「 Incarnation Kim Dokja will be killed by the person he loves most. 」
I had forgotten. All prophecies couldn’t be interpreted literally. In this Star Stream, people were stories.
[The constellation ‘Secretive Plotter’ is looking at you.]
[The constellation ‘Demon-like Judge of Fire’ is looking at you.]
[The constellation ‘Prisoner of the Golden Headband’ is looking at you.]
[The constellation ‘Abyssal Black Flame Dragon’ is looking at you.]
[The constellation ‘Maritime War God’ is looking at you.]
As the gazes of countless stars in the sky poured towards me, a story was running towards me.
“Ahhhhhh!”
Parents, friends and lovers were all stories.
[The remaining capture time is 2 minutes.]
This wasn’t the Ways of Survival I knew but—It was a story more wonderful than Ways of Survival.
[A constellation of a small planet is looking at you.]
[All the constellations on the Korean Peninsula are looking at you.]
It was my story. I laughed as Yoo Jonghyuk’s sword pierced my heart.
[Your fate has been realized.]
My body slowly sank down and Yoo Jonghyuk held onto me. “Kim Dokja.”
“It was a really great story. Isn’t that right?”
Yoo Jonghyuk stared down at me silently. I couldn’t find any words and just watched. It was as if I had always been meant to do this.
And then we have the moment everyone knows.
As the gazes of countless stars in the sky poured towards me, a story was running towards me.
“Ahhhhhh!”
Parents, friends and lovers were all stories.
[The remaining capture time is 2 minutes.]
This wasn’t the Ways of Survival I knew but—It was a story more wonderful than Ways of Survival.
[A constellation of a small planet is looking at you.]
[All the constellations on the Korean Peninsula are looking at you.]
It was my story. I laughed as Yoo Jonghyuk’s sword pierced my heart.
[Your fate has been realized.]
My body slowly sank down and Yoo Jonghyuk held onto me. “Kim Dokja.”
“It was a really great story. Isn’t that right?”
Now why would he even mention lovers out of nowhere?
[Kim Dokja had learned how to live from this man.]
This man was my father, my older brother and my oldest friend.
Kim Dokja previously saw Yoo Joonghyuk as his father, brother, oldest friend, so ‘parents, friends’, is already covered.
He suddenly said ‘lovers’ out of nowhere, which means he considered Yoo Joonghyuk as a potential lover.
‘parents, friends, lovers’ – it’s all what Yoo Joonghyuk was to him.
I think this is the moment Kim Dokja realized his love for Yoo Joonghyuk was romantic.
And he laughs because he never expected to fall in love with none other than Yoo Joonghyuk, the main character of his most loved novel. He probably thinks he isn’t good enough to be in love with the Yoo Joonghyuk he admired and looked up to so much.
The fate message was strong enough to be repeated three times. I was confused. Had I fallen in love with someone?
This man was my father, my older brother and my oldest friend.
Like saying the 3 roles Yoo Joognhyuk was to him, and so Kim Dokja is confused, ‘had I fallen in love with someone’ – he didn’t know he had fallen in love with Yoo Joonghyuk.
So Kim Dokja laughs because he never expected to fall in love with Yoo Joonghyuk, he isn’t good enough, but he also laughs because somehow even if he isn’t good enough, he’s just a reader, somehow it became his story, he became the main character there, killed by the person he loves most, so that’s why he says this –
This wasn’t the Ways of Survival I knew but—It was a story more wonderful than Ways of Survival.
He protected Yoo Joonghyuk, took Yoo Jonghyuk’s parts and became the main character without even knowing, killed by the one he loves most due to a prophecy. I think at this point he realized, he became the main character of the story, it’s him who’s the main character of the story not Yoo Joonghyuk, but of course he denies it after.
And he just has enough self-love at this moment to say it’s a story more wonderful than Ways of Survival. He loves Yoo Joonghyuk but he also loves himself, loves his reader self and he loved that he was the main character there.
Now if we look at these lines
This man was my father, my older brother and my oldest friend.
Parents, friends and lovers were all stories.
The fate message was strong enough to be repeated three times. I was confused. Had I fallen in love with someone?
This wasn’t the Ways of Survival I knew but—It was a story more wonderful than Ways of Survival.
It was my story. I laughed as Yoo Jonghyuk’s sword pierced my heart.
[Your fate has been realized.]
「 Incarnation Kim Dokja will be killed by the person he loves most. 」
We can connect the dots together.
Kim Dokja, lonely and isolated, saw Yoo Joonghyuk when he was a character of Ways of Survival, as his father, older brother and oldest friend.
Then the world ended and Yoo Joonghyuk became real, someone he could actually interact with, and Kim Dokja fell in love with Yoo Joonghyuk without knowing, due to his emotional repression and some inability to process his emotions.
‘Parents, friends, lovers’, were all stories, whether Yoo Joonghyuk was a parent, friend or lover to him, it had been his story.
The evolution of Yoo Joonghyuk from a parent, friend, then lover (since he loves Yoo Joonghyuk) had been part of his story. He saw Yoo Joonghyuk as his father and oldest friend when Yoo Joonghyuk was a fictional character, then fell in love with Yoo Joonghyuk (or realized more his love for Yoo Joonghyuk), doing everything to protect him, when Yoo Joonghyuk became a real person.
And this, his change in emotions towards Yoo Joonghyuk is all his story.
This wasn’t the Ways of Survival I knew but—It was a story more wonderful than Ways of Survival.
Kim Doka finally admitted to himself, his story beat Ways of Survival. That there was a greater story than Ways of Survival, one whom he was the main character of -
As the gazes of countless stars in the sky poured towards me, a story was running towards me.
with countless stars shining down upon him.
He had taken the main character position without knowing and he previously just a reader of his favourite novel, was going to be killed in such an epic and romantic way by the person he loved the most, who was the main character of the novel he loved the most –
It was my story. I laughed as Yoo Jonghyuk’s sword pierced my heart.
Even piercing his heart.
To me, before his death by the one he loves the most, this was the moment Kim Dokja really immersed himself in reality, and realized he was not just a reader but the main character of the story. Hence he said:
It was my story.
Now let’s look at this again
As the gazes of countless stars in the sky poured towards me, a story was running towards me.
“Ahhhhhh!”
Parents, friends and lovers were all stories.
Yoo Joonghyuk was running towards him, ‘a story was running towards me’, and then Kim Dokja says ‘Parents, friends and lovers were all stories’, which is what Yoo Joonghyuk had been to him, a parent, his oldest friend, and then a lover after he realized his love for him – because even someone as dense and oblivious and in self-denial as Kim Dokja can realize that yeah, Yoo Joonghyuk is going to be the one to kill him, [Incarnation Kim Dokja will be killed by the person he loves most.], he finally understands his own heart, he’s in love with Yoo Joonghyuk in reality.
And Yoo Joonghyuk is his story, the evolution of his feelings for Yoo Joonghyuk from parent to friend as a character and then to lover as a real human being, is part of his story, and that story is running towards him, about to kill him and fulfil his fate of being killed by the person he loves most.
And then Kim Dokja extends his mind and with the realization of the evolution of that story of his feelings for Yoo Joonghyuk, realizes he’s in reality and he’s made his own story as the main character of the story in the apocalypse, like with such a big event as being killed by the one he loves most, who’s the main character of Ways of Survival, a story even greater than Ways of Survival, because he’s the main character which he always yearned to be.
[Your fate has been realized.]
My body slowly sank down and Yoo Jonghyuk held onto me. “Kim Dokja.”
“It was a really great story. Isn’t that right?”
Yoo Jonghyuk stared down at me silently. I couldn’t find any words and just watched. It was as if I had always been meant to do this.
He says to Yoo Joonghyuk it was a really great story, knowing what he himself means, about his love, the evolution of his love for Yoo Joonghyuk, while knowing Yoo Joonghyuk wouldn’t know what it truly meant because he’s hiding his feelings for Yoo Joonghyuk, and he confesses ‘It was as if I had always been meant to do this’. Like he knows yeah he had always been meant to be the main character of the story, killed by the one he loved the most. He couldn’t find any words because he really didn’t expect to fall in love with Yoo Joonghyuk, that he could fall in love with someone, that Yoo Joonghyuk was the person he loved the most.
He even dies because he sacrificed himself to save Yoo Joonghyuk, who ironically sacrificed himself to save him –
-Stop! Stop it you son of a bitch!
At this time, the main scenario was flowing through the holographic panel at the Seoul branch of the bureau. Some dokkaebis sighed as they watched the storm of magic power on the screen.
The dokkaebis instinctively knew it. The scene that would unfold from now on would be the best story since the Seoul Dome scenario began.
Bihyung watched the scene and was one of them.
-Yoo Jonghyuk! This damn ■■■ bastard…! Please!
-Everyone stop him! Block Yoo Jonghyuk!
“Kim Dokja won’t die.” Bihyung continued without understanding why he was making such a boast. “As long as he becomes the demon king, Yoo Jonghyuk won’t kill Kim Dokja.”
Bihyung looked back at the screen.
Perhaps the plan was the nebulae was to kill Kim Dokja by making Yoo Jonghyuk the demon king. However, it was the arrogance of the nebulae who didn’t fully understand Yoo Jonghyuk’s personality.
-Don’t interrupt!
Bihyung watched Yoo Jonghyuk through the screen and swallowed down the boiling sensation.
In the end, Yoo Jonghyuk would die here but Kim Dokja would live. Thus, Kim Dokja would once again escape the constellation’s fate.
I watched Yoo Jonghyuk being tinged with demonic energy and was in a dazed state.
-Are you concerned about what will happen to this world after I go back?
-You must be afraid. The moment I disappear, this world will disappear. Isn’t that right?
It was like thousands of insects had entered my eyes as my senses were disturbed.
“Kyaaaaak!” The party members screamed.
There was an explosion in the surrounding area.
-This world won’t disappear if I regress. This world won’t end or be upset if I die.
The words spoken by Yoo Jonghyuk encroached on my head.
‘This world won’t disappear, even if Yoo Jonghyuk goes back.’
I didn’t understand it. Yoo Jonghyuk’s sponsor. The existence that never responded to anything in Ways of Survival… actually replied to Yoo Jonghyuk?
Why? Under these circumstances?
If Yoo Jonghyuk was right, I would no longer have to worry about him regressing. Even if he returned, I could guarantee that this world remained and keep living in it.
“Kim Dokja, think about it. The opportunities won’t often come.”
The muscles of my body creaked from the excessive force collision. Yoo Jonghyuk also poured out all of his power.
I felt the texture of the blade in my hand and realized. My pain was alleviated by Fourth Wall while Yoo Jonghyuk would be taking all of it without a wall.
“No, it’s difficult.”
Was it okay just because he could regress? Would he sacrifice himself to end this scenario?
I told him, “There is no such development in the ending that I want.”
“Are you still failing to understand? I must be the demon king…!”
“I will be the demon king.”
“Don’t talk bullshit! If you do that, you will surely die. After being banished from the scenario, resurrection is useless!”
He was clearly panicking at the prospect of Yoo Joonghyuk’s death. He represses his emotions again, his argument was that he needs to save and protect Yoo Joonghyuk because he can’t let Yoo Joonghyuk regress, what will happen to the world, but this is all invalid here because he said Yoo Joonghyuk will regress and the world will remain the same, Yoo Joonghyuk’s sponsor who never spoke even confirms it, yet he still wants to protect and save Yoo Joonghyuk out of his love for him.
Perhaps Yoo Jonghyuk didn’t understand my words. There was a huge wall between us that couldn’t be filled.
However, it was due to this wall that I could see this guy again and again. Yoo Jonghyuk’s remorse, his despair and his dreams. An indomitable will that didn’t give up.
I grew up reading all of this.
“Think about it. Who would watch a story without the protagonist?”
There were numerous memories in my head. I overcame all the tragedies in my life with a single story. It was the story of a person who never gave up, no matter what. That story made me. I could survive to reach here.
“I will pay off the debt.”
“…Debt? What do you mean?”
“You saved me once. Now I’m going to save you.”
“What nonsense is this…?”
And yup he represses his emotions of love for Yoo Joonghyuk lol, even Yoo Joonghyuk knows its nonsense.
[If you fail the scenario, you will be banished forever from this scenario.]
Banishment from the scenario. It didn’t have the same meaning as ‘death.’ It was to be kicked forever from the flow controlled by the Star Stream.
I would die in that empty void that couldn’t be reached by the eyes of the dokkaebis and constellations.
There was no one in the Star Stream who could endure that void. No constellations could exist without the scenario.
Now I knew for sure. This was what those damn nebulae were hoping for. I knew very well what that damn fate was pointing to.
“I am the demon king.”
The nebulae probably thought it was going as they planned. Finally, as fate decreed, Kim Dokja would die here.
However, they would never know. Just as they placed the scenario of fate here… I had been preparing for three days to escape from this damn fate.
Faint sunlight was leaking in from the gap in the broken ceiling. I laughed as I gazed at the sunlight that seemed dazzling.
“Now let’s start the last scenario.”
Today was the day that ‘Incarnation Kim Dokja’ would die.
He knows he would die for real, but he’s ready to become a constellation.
So I missed this romantic part:
Today was the day that ‘Incarnation Kim Dokja’ would die.
「 Incarnation Kim Dokja will be killed by the person he loves most. 」
[Your modifier is the ‘Demon King of Salvation’.]
Kim Dokja loves Yoo Joonghyuk so much, Yoo Joonghyuk was his salvation.
However, it was due to this wall that I could see this guy again and again. Yoo Jonghyuk’s remorse, his despair and his dreams. An indomitable will that didn’t give up.
I grew up reading all of this.
“Think about it. Who would watch a story without the protagonist?”
There were numerous memories in my head. I overcame all the tragedies in my life with a single story. It was the story of a person who never gave up, no matter what. That story made me. I could survive to reach here.
“I will pay off the debt.”
And he was also Yoo Joonghyuk’s salvation.
(Not to mention he helped Yoo Joonghyuk as the constellation ‘Demon King of Salvation’ in the 0th’s turn, there, he was also Yoo Joonghyuk’s salvation, and he became the ‘Demon King of Salvation’ due to being killed by the person he loved the most. If that’s not romance, I don’t know what is.)
It was my story. I laughed as Yoo Jonghyuk’s sword pierced my heart.
[Your fate has been realized.]
My body slowly sank down and Yoo Jonghyuk held onto me. “Kim Dokja.”
“It was a really great story. Isn’t that right?”
The words poured out all at once and I couldn’t answer. Finally, Yoo Jonghyuk approached me. “I guess your mother doesn’t like me.”
This man was my father, my older brother and my oldest friend.
Dokja’s mother Lee Sookyung said to Yoo Joonghyuk ‘You’re the one who took my role’ so this line of Kim Dokja, that Yoo Joonghyuk was his father, older brother and oldest friend was definitely meant to be reprised, since it’s part of the story of his evolution of love to romantic for Yoo Joonghyuk.
Then Yoo Jonghyuk replied, “Kim Dokja is necessary for this world. I need him.”
“…”
“He will be my companion and he will see the end of the scenario.”
Lee Sookyung’s expression slowly hardened. Companion? The voice of her young son appeared in her mind.
-That jerk, he is a complete psychopath.
-He knows nothing but how to use people. -He will do whatever it takes to reach his goal.
“This is strange. The Yoo Jonghyuk I heard about will never talk like you.”
“Does your family like to talk as if they know someone well?”
Yoo Jonghyuk pulled out his sword. It was a hard attitude that showed no more dialogue was needed.
“Give me Kim Dokja. Then I will spare you.”
Lee Sookyung stared into Yoo Jonghyuk’s blazing eyes and recalled her son’s voice. Despite his many complaints, her son always looked somewhat excited.
-But the story won’t continue without him. Ways of Survival is such a novel.
At this moment, enlightenment filled Lee Sookyung’s head.
「 Incarnation Kim Dokja will be killed by the person he loves most. 」
Lee Sookyung realized the true meaning of this fate. She knew who would kill her beloved son. Maybe it was an insight Lee Sookyung was able to reach because she was used to these types of metaphors and symbolism.
“I see.” Lee Sookyung realized everything and laughed.
This wasn’t her original plan. Still, the prophecy meant that the plan had to be modified here.
“I’m sorry but I can’t let you see my son.”
“Why?”
“A mother’s responsibility is to control her child if he mixes in with bad people.” Lee Sookyung’s eyes were cold as she took out the Eight Beaded Bell. “I have to send my son back to reality.”
Kim Dokja’s mother even realized the guy Kim Dokja had loved so much, from that novel, Yoo Joonghyuk, had become real, and that maybe Kim Dokja had fallen in love with the person Yoo Joonghyuk, which is why she says ‘I have to send my son back to reality’, to protect her son.
So we were here –
[Your fate has been realized.]
My body slowly sank down and Yoo Jonghyuk held onto me. “Kim Dokja.”
“It was a really great story. Isn’t that right?”
Yoo Jonghyuk stared down at me silently. I couldn’t find any words and just watched. It was as if I had always been meant to do this.
He says to Yoo Joonghyuk it was a really great story, knowing what he himself means, about his love, the evolution of his love for Yoo Joonghyuk, while knowing Yoo Joonghyuk wouldn’t know what it truly meant because he’s hiding his feelings for Yoo Joonghyuk, and he confesses ‘It was as if I had always been meant to do this’. Like he knows yeah he had always been meant to be the main character of the story, killed by the one he loved the most. He couldn’t find any words because he really didn’t expect to fall in love with Yoo Joonghyuk, that he could fall in love with someone, that Yoo Joonghyuk was the person he loved the most.
There were numerous memories in my head. I overcame all the tragedies in my life with a single story. It was the story of a person who never gave up, no matter what. That story made me. I could survive to reach here.
“I will pay off the debt.”
Now I knew for sure. This was what those damn nebulae were hoping for. I knew very well what that damn fate was pointing to.
The nebulae probably thought it was going as they planned. Finally, as fate decreed, Kim Dokja would die here.
He sacrificed himself for Yoo Joonghyuk, it’s his fate to die by Yoo Joonghyuk’s hand, because Kim Dokja can never not protect Yoo Joonghyuk, so it’s his fate to die by Yoo Joonghyuk’s hand, Yoo Joonghyuk who was trying to save him.
Edit: Alternative Interpretation
Just noticed recently, 'Parents, friends, and lovers were all stories', can be seen in a much more simpler and clearer way.
Parents, friends and lovers were all stories.
- Kim Dokja, Chapter 188: Ep. 35 - The 73rd Demon King, VII
Reading the novel at that part and just noticed something, Kim Dokja first died due to his mother, but the fate to die by the person he loved the most wasn't fulfilled, Kim Dokja was then attacked by his companions, friends, after he became a Demon King, so called 'Evil', and then Kim Dokja was killed by Yoo Joonghyuk, and the Fate to die was fulfilled because Yoo Joonghyuk is the person he loves the most.
'Parents, friends and lovers were all stories.'
Died due to his mother, parent, attacked by his companions, friends, killed by Yoo Joonghyuk, and the Fate worked because he's the person Kim Dokja loves the most, lover.
Kim Dokja practically confessed he wanted Yoo Joonghyuk as his lover.
It was my story. I laughed as Yoo Joonghyuk's sword pierced my heart.
Then Kim Dokja says this, it means Kim Dokja acknowledged dying because of his mother, attacked by his friends, and killed by the one whom he wants to be his lover, Yoo Joonghyuk. He thinks of it all in order, each one of them, his mother, his friends, his potential lover, being a story.
This wasn't the Ways of Survival I knew but—It was a story more wonderful than Ways of Survival.
Before this, the novel went into Kim Dokja's trauma with his father and mother, which eventually led him to reading Ways of Survival. It even touched a bit on Kim Dokja's dating life, when he was with Jung Heewon.
I felt like I had unexpectedly been stung. In fact, I had never been on a blind date.
It was like touching upon Kim Dokja's life and of course he read Ways of Survival, then Kim Dokja says 'It was a story more wonderful than Ways of Survival', this isn't only a Kim Dokja and Yoo Joonghyuk moment but Kim Dokja actually showed self-love here.
What Kim Dokja means is that the story became about him, his Fate to die was dying cause of his mother but it didn't work because his mother isn't the person he loves the most, attacked by his friends who were screaming at and worrying about him, and then dying by the hand of his potential lover, Yoo Joonghyuk, the person he loves the most.
And that, that is a story more wonderful than Ways of Survival. Finally Kim Dokja seemed to get out of 'Ways of Survival and Yoo Joonghyuk is the best' here. And acknowledged that the story of Ways of Survival in the real world had become about him, Kim Dokja, the main character of the story. That he is the main character of the story. And that it is a story more wonderful than Ways of Survival, his life had become better than his life being isolated and lonely reading Ways of Survival with his trauma, and he was even a better protagonist than Yoo Joonghyuk of Ways of Survival, the story he created was better than Ways of Survival to him.
'Parents, friends and lovers were all stories.'
Kim Dokja died due to his mother, was attacked by his friends, and was killed by Yoo Joonghyuk, the one he loves the most. Then he says out of nowhere 'Parents, friends and lovers were all stories'. Why the heck would Kim Dokja mention 'lover' out of nowhere as Yoo Joognhyuk was running towards him.
This is practically saying Kim Dokja loving Yoo Joonghyuk romantically is canon! And I believe he realized his feelings for Yoo Joonghyuk was romantic here.
And then the Demon Realm Arc contains all the Kim Dokja Yoo Joonghyuk moments, and it’s where Asmodeus who’s the demon king of lust appears, and Kim Dokja protects Yoo Joonghyuk from him, and it’s really hinting Kim Dokja is protecting a potential lover from the lust of a bad guy. They never say it but there’s all this romantic implication.
And then we have the manly Yoo Joonghyuk transforming into a woman to help Kim Dokja and learn his main sword technique and it’s like implying that Yoo Joonghyuk is Kim Dokja’s love interest and like the ‘female lead’ (he later fights Surya in his female form with Breaking the Sky sword technique in front of Sangah who was thought to be Kim Dokja’s love interest too, like the story is implying Yoo Joonghyuk somehow became the ‘female lead’). Like no one thought Yoo Joonghyuk, manly, masculine, and tall protagonist would do something like that, and it was because the demon of lust Asmodeus destroyed Uriel’s personal scenario, sending his life in danger. And we have Kim Dokja just being stunned at Yoo Joonghyuk’s female form (like he can finally confront his feelings of attraction to Yoo Joonghyuk because he’s in a more socially acceptable form?) saying she’s three times as beautiful as Yoo Joonghyuk, and wanting to recruit her but she goes away.
After Kim Dokja’s realization of love for Yoo Joonghyuk, we just have so many moments between the two, like Kim Dokja being so happy that Yoo Joonghyuk was near that he wanted to call out his name, and being proud of Yoo Joonghyuk’s growth that he wanted to boast (though this could be argued as emotional repression as well), and betting everything 1 million coins on Yoo Joonghyuk and even that, even if he loses all the money it’s fine, because Yoo Joonghyuk would be alive.
I let out a sigh of relief. Yoo Jonghyuk was unharmed because the Breaking the Sky Sword Saint had acted. Thanks to this, the martial arts competition would be cancelled but it was better than Yoo Jonghyuk dying.
He understood what I was saying and Asmodeus smiled at Yoo Jonghyuk’s face.
[Indeed, I can bend my taste if it is this beautiful body.]
At this point, it was clear that a normal conversation was impossible. I spoke roughly. “Stop talking with your true voice. There won’t be any incarnations left around me.”
And like, Kim Dokja gets protective of Yoo Joonghyuk in front of a Demon King of Lust, what are we supposed to think, Lust, BL, yaoi??? And Kim Dokja actually spoke roughly, which must be his first time doing that. Also he became the Demon King of Salvation with his death, and he’s a Demon King now, a dominant presence who can protect his protagonist, the one he romantically loves.
Also Yoo Joonghyuk won against a beautiful woman by using his own beautiful woman form, it was like beauty vs beauty in the martial arts tournament, Yoo Joonghyuk in his female form vs ‘the Ice Flower Goddess’ who was most likely a beautiful woman, further cementing his status as the ‘female lead’ / Kim Dokja’s love interest.
[Hahaha, what is the modifier of this constellation? Was it Demon King of Bragging?]
[Queen of the Underworld! You brought a very delightful friend!]
On the screen, Yoo Jonghyuk was confronting the Ice Flower Goddess. The Brash Swamp Predator chuckled like he thought it was cute.
[This scenario seems tough for him, let alone the end of the scenarios.]
I quietly clenched my fists. I knew the path Yoo Jonghyuk would walk and the achievement he would make in the future. I knew very well that the hard-working guy would one day kill every member of this damn Gourmet Association.
And Kim Dokja gets angry when Yoo Joonghyuk is mocked at the Gourmet Association, which is rare of him.
I didn’t believe in him? It was a natural story. I couldn’t believe in that sunfish who often died…
[I believe in him.]
Even so, I answered it like this. Persephone’s eyes flashed at my natural answer.
[In the first place, I came here because I believed in him.]
I stared at Yoo Jonghyuk on the screen. It didn’t matter how many times he was defeated, broken or felt despair. He was a person who didn’t give up until the end. If I couldn’t believe in him, who could I believe in the first place? Even if this round failed…
This guy would surely see the ending of this world eventually.
I slowly closed my eyes before opening them again.
[I’ll raise my bet. I’ll make it one million coins.]
And then he says he believes in Yoo Joonghyuk, when previously he was like –
If I believed in Yoo Jonghyuk, it was in his experience, not his personality. This was a guy with three times the experience and he learnt various types of information from the 41st round Shin Yoosung.
Furthermore, Paradise was originally his main responsibility. He took care of it well in the second regression so he should do better this time. Just…
“…I’m a bit worried.”
It seems he became more honest with his feelings of love for Yoo Joonghyuk, even taking the action of making his bet one million coins, and we all know, whether he hates himself or loves himself, Kim Dokja is more a man of actions than words, whether it is self-sacrificing himself, or talking leisurely and extracting good deals from the gods in the sky.
[In the first place, I came here because I believed in him.]
He was a person who didn’t give up until the end. If I couldn’t believe in him, who could I believe in the first place?
[I’ll raise my bet. I’ll make it one million coins.]
These lines say it all.
And then we have this whole nice part.
Everyone touched by the smoke screamed as they oxidized. Judging from the Brash Swamp Predator’s state, he was using roughly one-third of his status. One-third was enough to ruin the venue. The surrounding constellations were also supporting his use of probability.
The grounds of the venue were split apart by the monster’s feet. It was a terrible destructive power. However, it wasn’t as strong compared to Peace Land or Dark Castle. At those times, the outer gods had descended.
Still, there was no guarantee that this situation was better than Peace Land or Dark Castle. In Peace Land, there was the Paradox Baekchung, Kyrgios. In Dark Castle, there was Goryeo’s First Sword.
…Then who was present now?
[The constellation ‘Demon King of Salvation’ is looking at incarnation Yoo Jonghyuk.]
Yoo Jonghyuk frowned at my message. “…Kim Dokja. Is your work finished?”
[The constellation ‘Demon King of Salvation’ says it is still in progress.]
“Still?”
At this moment, a shadow of suspicion filled Yoo Jonghyuk’s eyes. Yoo Jonghyuk stared at the Brash Swamp Predator and asked, “Perhaps… did this guy appear because of you?”
The bastard noticed quickly.
“…Kim Dokja?” He was filled with tremendous anger.
I reached out as an apology.
[The constellation ‘Demon King of Salvation’ has sponsored 100 coins to the incarnation ‘Yoo Jonghyuk.’]
“I don’t need it!”
Then the Brash Swamp Predator moved. He was an ancient lizard that governed all the swamps on his planet. The embodiment of his head was suddenly rising from the back of the Ice Flower Goddess who had become a lizard.
There was a terrible scream as the incarnation was deprived of her body. The lizard screamed and rushed forward, swinging a huge tail towards Yoo Jonghyuk. The tail of the lizard smashed through Yoo Jonghyuk’s Strong Self-Defense and he was hit hard.
“Kuk…”
Yoo Jonghyuk didn’t seem to have reached the second stage of transcendence yet. Well, it would be impossible for even Yoo Jonghyuk to reach the second stage of transcendence in just two weeks.
It could be called a devil’s talent that he could drive the first stage Ice Flower Goddess to such a state.
Then there wasn’t much time.
[The constellation ‘Demon King of Salvation’ is making a request.]
Yoo Jonghyuk had experienced Omniscient Reader’s Viewpoint several times and should I what I was asking for. By the way, Yoo Jonghyuk’s reaction was unexpected. “I don’t want to.”
[The constellation ‘Demon King of Salvation’ says if this continues, everyone will die.]
“I won’t die.”
[The constellation ‘Demon King of Salvation’ says it isn’t the time to be stubborn.]
I wasn’t convinced I could knock down that monster even if I used Electrification in Yoo Jonghyuk’s body. There might be a way to use the Fourth Wall like last time but it was only possible for constellations who used mental skills.
Yoo Jonghyuk used swift footwork to attack and the Brash Swamp Predator once again prepared his poison. Based on the number of sparks around his mouth, this was a really devastating attack.
I urged Yoo Jonghyuk but Yoo Jonghyuk was adamant. “Go and do what you have to do, Kim Dokja.”
I panicked at the unexpected action. No, why was this bastard so stubborn today? I hurriedly looked around. Since it was like this, I had to borrow another hand, even if the martial arts competition was ruined.
I just found this whole part so cute. It was like two lovers talking to each other, ‘hey have you handled that yet’ ‘no something complicated happened’ ‘is that guy your fault then’, with trust and belief in each other for the respective work they took on.
And Kim Dokja loves his Yoo Joonghyuk so much that even if he believed in him, he still believed he needed to reach out for help to protect Yoo Joonghyuk. It’s so cute.
No, what the hell was going on? I held my breath and used my ‘status’ to move through the constellations. I barely reached the front of the panel and another tremendous lightning attack came from the screen. The entire screen turned white from the powerful lightning.
The light slowly faded and once it disappeared, black ashes were scattered like snow. In front of my eyes, one man was standing still. It was the appearance of Yoo Jonghyuk who had raised his sword with an arrogant expression.
Under his feet while a giant lizard charred by lightning. Yoo Jonghyuk stepped off the lizard’s body and walked to one corner of the venue, pulling out something black that had been plugged in.
-There is no second place in this competition.
It was the Black Demon Sword.
-Thus, this is mine.
Then the host’s voice rang out.
-The winner of the Martial Arts Competition has been decided!
I didn’t know how such a thing was possible. I rubbed my eyes and glanced again. The situation was still the same. It wasn’t the Breaking the Sky Sword Saint but… Yoo Jonghyuk?
-The winner is the Breaking the Sky Sword Beauty, Yoo Jonghyuk!
No, what the hell was the Breaking the Sky Sword Beauty…? My questions didn’t last for long. It was due to the overwhelming system messages that entered my ears.
[The sub scenario ― Gourmet Association Betting has been completed.]
[You have won the bet.]
[You have acquired a new story!]
And Yoo Joonghyuk wins the bet for Kim Dokja by transforming into his beautiful female form, if this whole exchange isn’t lover behavior, I don’t know what is.
And it’s so stupid and so cute that Kim Dokja didn’t see Yoo Joonghyuk in his beautiful female form and doesn’t know what Breaking the Sky Sword Beauty is lol
They just get closer after Kim Dokja’s realization of his love for Yoo Joonghyuk is romantic and Yoo Joonghyuk goes to find Kim Dokja in the Demon Realm with the help of their greatest shipper Uriel and Kim Dokja even helps Yoo Joonghyuk with his master (even though it was in a slightly sadistic way and Yoo Joonghyuk got spanked on the butt).
And I forgot this part
I looked at the sky and laughed. Due to these guys, I hated the constellations but I couldn’t hate the story.
“Let’s meet again, Yoo Jonghyuk.”
Kim Dokja wanted to meet Yoo Joonghyuk again past his death, he already knew he would find some way to revive (while poor Yoo Joonghyuk is holding his body and screaming No and his name and doesn’t want him to go), he wanted to meet Yoo Joonghyuk again with the new realization of his romantic feelings for him.
I mean Kim Dokja just does a lot for Yoo Joonghyuk after he’s killed by the person he loves most who is Yoo Joonghyuk, he checks up on Yoo Joonghyuk in Ways of Survival, he protects him from Asmodeus, the Demon King of Lust, protectively and almost possessively, he panics when he couldn’t save Yoo Joonghyuk from Asmodeus, he helps Yoo Joonghyuk make up with his master, he bets 1 million coins on Yoo Joonghyuk, his entire fortune, even if he is the only one doing so.
He took Yoo Joonghyuk away even when Yoo Joonghyuk wanted to stay and help his Master, to protect him, and he invests a large amount of his fortune to save Yoo Joonghyuk (and his fortune was gained by Yoo Joonghyuk winning too) even though it’s dangerous despite being injured himself, not listening to his incarnation to not go.
In a distance place, the deafening roar of the constellations was shaking the earth. I could tell the number exceeded 12 just by the ‘status.’ At this moment, I had an ominous feeling.
…The constellations were gathered so how could the party members flee to here?
“Yoo Jonghyuk…”
None of the party members answered. I looked around the battlefield as an explosion occurred. Everyone except for Yoo Jonghyuk was here. In addition, someone was fighting the constellations.
[The ‘Fourth Wall’ is shaking faintly.]
“That stupid bastard…”
“Ahjussi! No!” Shin Yoosung clung to my waist when I tried to run forward. “Ahjussi will die. You’ll die there.”
She was an always straightforward and brave child. Fear was deeply permeated in the child’s eyes. Shin Yoosung burst into tears as I pulled away from her. In the saturated battlefield, the tears scattered like dust. Perhaps this child had seen it. It was the fear of a giant story that humans could never overcome.
“Please take care of Yoosung.”
I left Shin Yoosung to Jang Hayoung who was in a good condition and activated Way of the Wind. I heard a voice calling out to me from behind but had no time to turn around.
I moved forward and the pressure of the ‘status’ bursting from the centre of the battlefield became stronger. It was a fearsome storm of magic that I had never experienced before. The centre definitely contained Yoo Jonghyuk.
「 Kim Dokja thought: Is there a way? 」
The pages of Ways of Destruction flashed in my head.
「It isn’t possible. 」
「That method is too unreasonable. 」
I bit my lips. I predicted that this situation might happen. However, the time passed too quickly and I had been asleep for too long.
I was late. Yoo Jonghyuk was still far away and the wind wasn’t on my side. I could buy a new skill from the Dokkaebi Bag but I can’t guarantee its utilization.
In the end, I made a decision.
“I will invest three million coins into my strength, physique, agility and magic power.”
And then Kim Dokja calls for the help of Asmodeus whom he doesn’t like (due to what he did to Yoo Joonghyuk) –
[Stop him!]
A blue-white energy flew towards the constellations. In an instant, there were abrasions on my back and thighs as well as a long stab in my side.
“Yoo Jonghyuk!”
My cry didn’t reach him properly. Yoo Jonghyuk had fallen to his knees and his life was now flickering. No magic power could be felt from him. Yoo Jonghyuk was dying.
I held my breath and then shouted with the greatest true voice possible. [Asmodeus!]
The true voice burst out and the constellations blocked their ears for a moment. The great-grade constellations couldn’t stop and tears poured from my eyes. I shouted again.
[If you are a demon king, keep your promise!]
Kim Dokja just doesn’t care about the pain and then this is when Kim Dokja uses the greatest true voice possible, using all his power to save Joonghyuk and then Kim Dokja cries, this self-denial bastard admits he cried from Yoo Joonghyuk dying.
And the chapter is named ‘Dokja’s Story’ too, like saying this is a part of his story of love with Yoo Joonghyuk; Yoo Joonghyuk transforms into his female form, a woman in front of Yoo Sangah to fight Surya, and Dokja finds him almost dead and cries for him, and calls a previous enemy, Asmodeus for help, with his greatest true voice.
So if we look at it together –
Yoo Jonghyuk slowly raised his power and huge sparks appeared. He knew he wasn’t their opponent. However, it was always like this.
-Once you reach transcendence stage three, you can gain the power to destroy constellations.
The words left behind by his teacher were the only comfort that Yoo Jonghyuk now believed in. This time, he was using a shortcut to raise his power. This didn’t mean the power was a lie because he used a shortcut.
A dazzling aura burst from Yoo Jonghyuk’s body. Soft hair poured down like a waterfall while his large size became a smaller and sleeker body. He took the form that allowed him to practice the ultimate Breaking the Sky Swordsmanship. Yoo Sangah stared at the scene from behind and couldn’t help opening her mouth. “…Yoo Jonghyuk-ssi?”
Yoo Jonghyuk slowly turned back, his long hair cut off by the Black Demon Sword. The lines of the face had changed but it was clearly Yoo Jonghyuk. No, it was even more than before. Yoo Jonghyuk’s gaze stayed on Kim Dokja’s face for a moment.
“Take him away.”
Yoo Jonghyuk turned his head and wiped the blade of the Black Demon Sword. The constellations who were laughing at him were approaching.
King Oedipus opened his mouth. [Foolish transcendent. This is the cost of going against the constellations. You will die here.]
Yoo Jonghyuk replied while still wiping his blade. “I guess so. However, some of you will die too.”
[Haha, it is useless! The extinction of an incarnation body…]
Yoo Jonghyuk didn’t listen. Instead, he was reminded of Kim Dokja’s words.
‘Don’t give up on this life.’
“Then in the next life, half of you will die.”
Yoo Jonghyuk’s voice rang out quietly through the battlefield. Yoo Jonghyuk raised his head along with the Black Demon Sword. The footsteps of the constellations stopped for the first time. The power of transcendence was threatening the surroundings.
“In the next life, all of you will die.”
The Black Demon Sword’s cry seemed to touch the sky. The expressions of the constellations stiffened as Yoo Jonghyuk concluded his words.
“You will die forever.”
In a distance place, the deafening roar of the constellations was shaking the earth. I could tell the number exceeded 12 just by the ‘status.’ At this moment, I had an ominous feeling.
…The constellations were gathered so how could the party members flee to here?
“Yoo Jonghyuk…”
None of the party members answered. I looked around the battlefield as an explosion occurred. Everyone except for Yoo Jonghyuk was here. In addition, someone was fighting the constellations.
[The ‘Fourth Wall’ is shaking faintly.]
“That stupid bastard…”
“Ahjussi! No!” Shin Yoosung clung to my waist when I tried to run forward. “Ahjussi will die. You’ll die there.”
She was an always straightforward and brave child. Fear was deeply permeated in the child’s eyes. Shin Yoosung burst into tears as I pulled away from her. In the saturated battlefield, the tears scattered like dust. Perhaps this child had seen it. It was the fear of a giant story that humans could never overcome.
“Please take care of Yoosung.”
I left Shin Yoosung to Jang Hayoung who was in a good condition and activated Way of the Wind. I heard a voice calling out to me from behind but had no time to turn around.
I moved forward and the pressure of the ‘status’ bursting from the centre of the battlefield became stronger. It was a fearsome storm of magic that I had never experienced before. The centre definitely contained Yoo Jonghyuk.
「 Kim Dokja thought: Is there a way? 」
The pages of Ways of Destruction flashed in my head.
「It isn’t possible. 」
「That method is too unreasonable. 」
I bit my lips. I predicted that this situation might happen. However, the time passed too quickly and I had been asleep for too long.
I was late. Yoo Jonghyuk was still far away and the wind wasn’t on my side. I could buy a new skill from the Dokkaebi Bag but I can’t guarantee its utilization.
In the end, I made a decision.
“I will invest three million coins into my strength, physique, agility and magic power.”
[Your total stats have grown abnormally!]
[The coins you invested have allowed you to cross the stats limit of the scenario.]
[A fuller probability will release some of the stat constraints for this scenario.]
[The growth of the stats value compared to the invested coins will be randomly adjusted.]
A tremendous amount of sparks jumped from my body. It felt like my muscles were tearing and growing bigger. There was the feeling of my bone density changing and a terrible pain came over me.
“Cough…”
I had put it off until now due to the poor cost to value ratio but there was no other way.
[Your mind can’t cope with your evolving incarnation body.]
[The exclusive skill ‘Fourth Wall’ is activated!]
[Your incarnation body is evolving to a new level!]
Since the early scenarios, the ‘overall stats’ didn’t have a big influence on combat. It was because stories, stigmas and skills had much more influence.
In addition, since the number of coins per level after level 100 was exponentially larger, it was more advantageous to buy a skill using the same amount of coins. Now the situation was different.
[All your stats have exceeded 200!]
[Your incarnation body can handle a bigger ‘status.’]
I needed a strong body, not a powerful skill.
[Your agility has reduced the air resistance.]
[Magic power is opening up the blocked bloodstream.]
A huge amount of coins was transforming my incarnation body.
[Your strength is causing an explosive change!]
The frequency of my footsteps and the speed at which the landscape passed in my vision changed drastically.
“Yoo Jonghyuk!”
Of course, it was impossible to surpass the constellations or transcendents. Still, it was enough to confront them for a while.
[Many constellations are envying your incarnation body.]
I crossed the wilderness at a tremendous speed and the centre of the battlefield finally entered my eyes. At the centre, I could see a dying person.
“You idiot! What are you doing?”
In front of Surya’s radiant light, Yoo Jonghyuk was dying. I didn’t know where his left arm had gone and steam was rising from his charred body. Even so, Yoo Jonghyuk was gripping the Black Demon Sword without moving an inch. Yoo Jonghyuk’s head moved slowly towards me. His voice wasn’t heard, as if he had no strength to open his lips.
[The ‘Fourth Wall’ is greatly shaken.]
The words of the Mass Production Maker came to mind. The constellations were also just part of this great story. They were also lonely and had to do these things.
…Bullshit.
[Get lost!]
[Stop him!]
A blue-white energy flew towards the constellations. In an instant, there were abrasions on my back and thighs as well as a long stab in my side.
“Yoo Jonghyuk!”
My cry didn’t reach him properly. Yoo Jonghyuk had fallen to his knees and his life was now flickering. No magic power could be felt from him. Yoo Jonghyuk was dying.
I held my breath and then shouted with the greatest true voice possible. [Asmodeus!]
The true voice burst out and the constellations blocked their ears for a moment. The great-grade constellations couldn’t stop and tears poured from my eyes. I shouted again.
[If you are a demon king, keep your promise!]
The constellations turned their gaze towards me and I triggered Way of the Wind to snatch Yoo Jonghyuk.
The situation was so big that I didn’t expect much. He was a shrewd guy and should know how dangerous it was to take my side right now. However, it was Asmodeus…
As if waiting, one star in the sky flashed. There was a storm coming in and something was descending.
[The Demon King of Lust and Fury has appeared in this world!]
A tremendous probability was flowing and a colossal presence was manifesting before my eyes as an incarnation body. A little girl surrounded by a dark aura raised her head.
It was the king of the Demon World who immediately subdued the transcendent Yoo Jonghyuk. Later, he would join one of the worst organizations in the world, ‘ the Seekers of the End.’
[D-Demon king!]
The 32nd demon king, Asmodeus started running wild.
[Ahahahahahat!]
He laughed and a huge rake appeared at the fingers of the demon king. Asmodeus’ ‘Bloody Grip’ scraped through the area and tore at the constellations.
[Kuaaaack!]
[The mad demon king!]
[What the hell is this?]
The constellations turned their gaze towards me and I triggered Way of the Wind to snatch Yoo Jonghyuk.
[Chase him!]
The constellations started running but my strengthened incarnation body was a bit faster than them. I ran with all my strength while carrying Yoo Jonghyuk on my shoulder. “Wake up please.”
Yoo Jonghyuk was barely breathing. The weight of his body was lighter than usual. He had suffered such severe pain that even the skeleton of his body seemed changed. I listened to his gradually fading heart beat and cried out, “Hey, don’t mess around! You can recover! Do something!”
However, Yoo Jonghyuk didn’t move. I called out to Biyoo and bought a few more Great Return Pills. My left hand supported his body while my right hand poured the pills into Yoo Jonghyuk’s mouth.
No effect was visible. He didn’t have the strength to swallow it. His breathing slowed and became distant. The tips of Yoo Jonghyuk’s toes were breaking and his body was disappearing.
I used Way of the Wind to wrap around the debris and prevent them from escaping. Even so, I couldn’t prevent the dim light from emerging from his heart.
I was well aware of this phenomenon. I had read the scene a few hundred times and had to know what it was.
「 Yoo Jonghyuk had a thought. 」
“Don’t think about it.”
「 This life ends here. 」
“Dammit! Don’t think about it!”
Story fragments were falling from Yoo Jonghyuk’s cheeks. I was scared of this story and slapped his cheek before crying out to the air.
“Shit! Don’t go back! You jerk, leave him alone!”
[The sponsor of incarnation ‘Yoo Jonghyuk’ is looking at you.]
“You can still survive! This round isn’t over! You can fight back against this guy! I can save you!”
Yoo Jonghyuk’s sponsor was silent. This guy always did the same thing. He watched Yoo Jonghyuk suffering from death. He placed the soul of a hopelessly broken man back into the world line of the past.
[The stigma ‘Regression Lv. 3’ has been activated!]
It was cruel. Was this really how it ended? How did I get here? Would Yoo Jonghyuk really die here?
Then a single line emerged.
[Incarnation ‘Yoo Jonghyuk’ is looking at his sponsor.]
“…Yoo Jonghyuk?”
Yoo Jonghyuk, who became so ragged that his shape couldn’t be recognized, stared at his sponsor with a single bloody eye. Sparks appeared around his disappearing body.
[Incarnation ‘Yoo Jonghyuk’ is resisting his sponsor.]
[All of the stories of incarnation ‘Yoo Jonghyuk’ is resisting death.]
This was something I had never seen in any round.
[The incarnation ‘Yoo Jonghyuk’ has refused to regress.]
This whole scene is so damn romantic, Yoo Joonghyuk transforms into his female form to protect Kim Dokja (in front of the beautiful Yoo Sangah no less), he cut his hair to prove it’s him even though he’s in a woman’s body, and it’s said ‘it’s even more him than before’ maybe talking about his desire to protect Kim Dokja out of his love for him or maybe his role as the ‘female lead’. And he remembers what Kim Dokja said to him, to live, so he fights, but for protecting Kim Dokja, he was even willing to die, saying they’d die in the next life.
Kim Dokja wakes up and immediately thinks of Yoo Joonghyuk, uses a huge amount of his fortune won by Yoo Joonghyuk to become more powerful, finds Yoo Joonghyuk almost dying, cries even though he’s such a liar, calls in his greatest true voice for the help of a previous enemy Asmodeus, snatches Yoo Joonghyuk away and tries to revive him by feeding him pills desperately, is so panicked that he shouts at Yoo Joonghyuk’s sponsor to leave him alone, and Yoo Joonghyuk hears Kim Dokja and musters up his own will while almost dying even though he became so ragged his shape couldn’t be recognized, he musters up his will to stare at his sponsor with a single bloody eye and resists regression.
It’s all just so romantic.
Like, it's really just a love story. Look at this compilation of scenes:
“Are you still failing to understand? I must be the demon king…!”
“I will be the demon king.”
“Don’t talk bullshit! If you do that, you will surely die. After being banished from the scenario, resurrection is useless!”
Yoo Jonghyuk was watching me. His eyes asked what I was going to do. I said to him, “…Yoo Jonghyuk. Do you remember the nebula we made? Kim Dokja’s Company.”
It wasn’t simply to save my mother. Everything would end if I belonged to a nebula.
There was no way I could overcome the unfair contract with them and I would never be able to reach the end of the story.
“…You still want to use that name.” Yoo Jonghyuk frowned as he moved close to me and pulled out a sword. “I will choose the name of the nebula.”
I smiled at the thought that Yoo Jonghyuk was joking. The energy of transcendence could be felt by my side. It was strangely relieving despite the presence of a person who had long surpassed my scale.
It might be because I felt like we were standing on the same horizon for the first time since the scenario began.
I declared towards the stars in the night sky. “I won’t bow to your fate.”
I pointed my sword towards those silent gazes.
“I will decide my story.”
“Kim Dokja! No! Kim Dokja!”
Without me, people were still continuing the scenarios. Just like Yoo Joonghyuk repeated the regressions. The 4th, 5th, 6th rounds… it led to an endless story where I could be easily forgotten. Meanwhile, people would move towards the ending. It was natural. It might be natural but I felt pained at the reminder.
I bit my lips and tried to say something. I’m glad. The words didn’t emerge from my mouth. Then I heard Yoo Joonghyuk’s voice. “In addition, everyone is telling your story.”
I slowly raised my head at the words. Yoo Joonghyuk’s face was still expressionless. “They say it a lot. Your story.”
I smiled slightly while covering my eyes with both hands. I didn’t appear so on the surface but I wanted to say that I was smiling. In the small darkness created with both hands, Yoo Joonghyuk’s voice was heard again as he drank tea.
“Let’s go back to Earth, Kim Dokja.”
[The constellation ‘Demon King of Salvation’…]
At this moment, Yoo Jonghyuk spoke. “…Shin Yoosung. Are you listening?”
Biyoo appeared along with these words.
[…Baat?]
“Turn off Kim Dokja’s screen.”
-Oh, the disciple of the Breaking the Sky Sword!
-Breaking the Sky Sword Beauty!
…Breaking the Sky Sword Beauty?
[We shouldn’t disparage an incarnation’s martial arts.]
-The winner of the Martial Arts Competition has been decided!
I didn’t know how such a thing was possible. I rubbed my eyes and glanced again. The situation was still the same. It wasn’t the Breaking the Sky Sword Saint but… Yoo Jonghyuk?
-The winner is the Breaking the Sky Sword Beauty, Yoo Jonghyuk!
The pages of the book opened and sentences appeared on the blank pages in real time.
「 Yoo Jonghyuk had a thought. 」
「 Wake up quickly, Kim Dokja. 」
「 Otherwise everyone will die. 」
…Dammit, this was why I was forced to leave. The next moment, I was sucked into the context of the sentences.
***
The battlefield was a ruin. Yoo Jonghyuk wiped his bloody lips while looking at the bodies of the incarnations on the ground and the approaching constellations.
The combination of the transcendent dog Breaking the Sky Master and the constellation Osu was amazing. They didn’t mind their broken bodies and were biting at the rushing great-grade constellations.
Thanks to this, Cleopatra in the front was a mess while King Oedipus had nasty bite wounds all over his body.
It was reasonably okay when dealing with great-grade constellations.
[Disgusting! You dare to call yourselves constellations when you can’t even deal with such bugs?]
However, the narrative-grade constellations watching from the rear came out and the situation completely reversed.
Shin Yoosung’s chimera dragon and the Thunder Eating Bird crashed down. Lee Hyunsung had his Steel Transformation shattered by the General of Vanara’s fist and he was rolling on the ground. Yoo Sangah was somehow managing to fight despite coughing up blood several times, but this seemed to be her limit.
Osu was stabbed by the Founder of Humanity’s Primitive Spear and staggered to the ground. Osu’s incarnation body was stabbed and the Breaking the Sky Master also staggered.
They opened the limits allowed by the probability of the 25th scenario. It wasn’t 100% power but the powerful ‘status’ that the parties present brought out filled the entire Demon World with dazzling white sparks.
This was the strength of the beings called constellations. They were beings who came from the highest place in this world.
Yoo Jonghyuk asked, “Why are you doing this?”
[The constellation ‘Supreme God of Light’ is laughing quietly.]
“It looks like you don’t have to have the history of being defeated by bugs.”
Surya’s cheeks subtly twitched at these words. The opening of the Lokapala’s status caused the expressions of the constellations to change. The opening of an excessive force caused sparks to appear around Surya’s body. However, Surya looked confident like he could afford it.
[Kuwaaaaaang!]
He released his ‘status’ and dealt one blow. However, the whole area became a terrible mess. The nearby structures were turned to ashes and the fleeing incarnations were destroyed. People collapsed while blood emerged from all orifices.
[Some constellations are dissatisfied with the progression of the scenario!]
[The constellation ‘Demon-like Judge of Fire’ is greatly angry!]
[The demon king ‘Overlord of the Great Demon Castle’ is pleased.]
[The demon king ‘Maker of Discord’ is excited!]
[Many constellations are excited about the great battle!]
Lee Hyunsung was defending in front and blood poured from his ears and mouth. Yoo Jonghyuk grabbed Lee Hyunsung’s shoulder.
“Back off, Lee Hyunsung. This is an opponent you can’t go against.”
Lee Hyunsung reflexively tried to say something but even that seemed hard. Yoo Jonghyuk left the faltering Lee Hyunsung behind him and walked forward while wiping the blood off the Black Demon Sword.
It was a desperate situation. His Sage’s Eyes was analyzing the battlefield in real time. The number of constellations visible at the moment was almost 20. Some of the great-grade constellations were eliminated from the field but it wasn’t a number he could win against.
「 Young disciple, no. You will die if you open that power! 」
The Breaking the Sky Master instinctively realized what Yoo Jonghyuk was going to do. However, Yoo Jonghyuk’s will was stubborn.
Yoo Jonghyuk slowly raised his power and huge sparks appeared. He knew he wasn’t their opponent. However, it was always like this.
-Once you reach transcendence stage three, you can gain the power to destroy constellations.
The words left behind by his teacher were the only comfort that Yoo Jonghyuk now believed in. This time, he was using a shortcut to raise his power. This didn’t mean the power was a lie because he used a shortcut.
A dazzling aura burst from Yoo Jonghyuk’s body. Soft hair poured down like a waterfall while his large size became a smaller and sleeker body. He took the form that allowed him to practice the ultimate Breaking the Sky Swordsmanship. Yoo Sangah stared at the scene from behind and couldn’t help opening her mouth. “…Yoo Jonghyuk-ssi?”
Yoo Jonghyuk slowly turned back, his long hair cut off by the Black Demon Sword. The lines of the face had changed but it was clearly Yoo Jonghyuk. No, it was even more than before. Yoo Jonghyuk’s gaze stayed on Kim Dokja’s face for a moment.
“Take him away.”
Yoo Jonghyuk turned his head and wiped the blade of the Black Demon Sword. The constellations who were laughing at him were approaching.
King Oedipus opened his mouth. [Foolish transcendent. This is the cost of going against the constellations. You will die here.]
Yoo Jonghyuk replied while still wiping his blade. “I guess so. However, some of you will die too.”
[Haha, it is useless! The extinction of an incarnation body…]
Yoo Jonghyuk didn’t listen. Instead, he was reminded of Kim Dokja’s words.
‘Don’t give up on this life.’
“Then in the next life, half of you will die.”
Yoo Jonghyuk’s voice rang out quietly through the battlefield. Yoo Jonghyuk raised his head along with the Black Demon Sword. The footsteps of the constellations stopped for the first time. The power of transcendence was threatening the surroundings.
“In the next life, all of you will die.”
The Black Demon Sword’s cry seemed to touch the sky. The expressions of the constellations stiffened as Yoo Jonghyuk concluded his words.
“You will die forever.”
[Arrogant transcendent, what bullshit…!]
At the beginning of the showdown, Yoo Jonghyuk moved.
The scorn of the constellations and the overwhelming disadvantage in power weren’t important to the present Yoo Jonghyuk. From the moment he entered the third round, he had been focused on only killing the enemies in front of him.
An aura spread from Yoo Jonghyuk and some of the great-grade constellations in front murmured to themselves. However, most of the constellations still looked down on Yoo Jonghyuk.
No matter how transcendent, he was just a human. The constellations had no reason to lose in a situation where they had an overwhelming advantage in numbers.
This became the last thought of the General of Vanara.
[The exclusive skill ‘Giant Body Transformation Lv. 6 is activated!]
Giant Body Transformation was used and Yoo Jonghyuk narrowed the distance to the constellations in an instant. Yoo Jonghyuk shot forward like a meteor.
By the time the General of Vanara realized the sword and hurriedly raised his huge double-edged sword, his head was already cut by the Black Demon Sword and flying through the air.
[You dare…!]
The General of Vanara’s eyes widened and he spoke in his true voice, even with his cut neck.
Yoo Jonghyuk cut the flying head in half using the Black Demon Sword.
It was a ridiculous end.
The excessively concentrated magic power was melting Yoo Jonghyuk’s blood. It was the result of invoking transcendence stage three to the limit. The maximum time he could stay in this state was 10 minutes. In these 10 minutes, Yoo Jonghyuk had to defeat everyone.
“Next.”
The death of the General of Vanara was a great shock to the constellations. The constellations didn’t disappear with the death of their incarnation bodies.
However, there was no one who wanted to lose their incarnation body in vain. A fatal death permanently damaged the constellations. All the constellations became stiff.
Yoo Jonghyuk utilized this short gap to attempt a second attack. The Black Demon Sword left a dark trajectory as it moved and cut off the wings of a giant bird. The Thunder Eating Bird let out a loud cry. Then the constellations started to move.
[You!]
The Founder of Humanity’s Primitive Spear aimed at Yoo Jonghyuk. It was a blow that would’ve turned any normal incarnation to powder.
However, Yoo Jonghyuk received this blow. The impact ruptured his right forearm muscle and the force pushed at his entire body. Blood poured from his mouth but Yoo Jonghyuk didn’t lose focus.
[Excessive concentration has expanded the category of the attributes!]
[The exclusive attribute ‘Ruler of Amusement’ is activated!]
His concentration awakened the power of the character. All the incoming constellations became data and flowed into Yoo Jonghyuk’s mind. At this moment, the world was a game to Yoo Jonghyuk. Yoo Jonghyuk avoided the attacks of the constellations with restrained movements and fought back using magic power.
[Kuaaack!]
The Founder of Humanity screamed as his fingers were cut by the Black Demon Sword.
Yoo Jonghyuk’s Black Demon Sword let out a deafening roar as it dug into the gap.
Breaking the Sky Swordsmanship.
Destruction skill.
Breaking the Sky Meteor.
The sword rose from the ground to the heavens, stabbing the sky like a thunderbolt. The branches of the sword energy hide in the dark clouds and created thunder. The thunder poured from the night sky and struck the constellations like meteorites.
Dozens of thunderbolts fell from the sky and the incarnation bodies of the constellations were pierced. It was a blow containing the power of transcendence stage three.
[Kuaaah!]
Yoo Jonghyuk watched the constellations struggling with the pain and felt himself dying. The experiences of the third round went through his mind.
It was a short round. Even so, many things happened.
[The story ‘One who Inherited the Name of the King’ is crying out.]
As if responding to his feelings, the stories starting speaking. It was as if every story had its own will. Most of them weren’t stories he had accumulated alone.
[The story ‘Person who Opposes the Miracle’ has begun.]
A story about returnees.
[The story ‘Paradise of Despair’ has begun.]
A story earned by preserving the abandoned paradise.
[The story ‘One who Fought Against an Outer God’ has begun.]
The story where he confronted the outer god.
[The story ‘Ruler of the Industrial Complex’ has begun.]
It was a story that he would’ve normally never achieved. It was a story that was unrelated to the current situation but it was a story related to someone else. It was a story that could never be achieved alone.
The stories started talking at the same time. It was as if they didn’t want to finish the story here. Along with the bitter pain, blood poured from Yoo Jonghyuk’s chest. He didn’t even know how he obtained these wounds.
There were a few fallen incarnation bodies on the ground. The Supreme God of Light Surya saw it and spoke.
[Amazing. You already can’t be called a human anymore, child.]
Yoo Jonghyuk’s stories emitted a bright light like he was rebelling against the true voice.
[The story ‘One Who Hunted the King of Disasters’ is roaring.]
Yoo Jonghyuk was a transcendent. The stories were the unique parts making up the constellations. Just having stories didn’t mean a person could be equal to the stars in the night sky. Even so, the current light pouring from Yoo Jonghyuk’s body was brighter than any constellation in the place.
Yoo Jonghyuk looked at the stories flowing from his body. Some were known and some were unfamiliar. There was a story that couldn’t be obtained again.
[The story ‘Life and Death Colleagues’ wants to continue.]
He couldn’t help glancing at Yoo Sangah and the other party members. He also saw Kim Dokja on Lee Hyunsung’s back.
Yoo Jonghyuk gripped the Black Demon Sword that was slipping from his hands.
…He couldn’t die. He couldn’t die in a place like this. He used the last of his strength to point the trembling sword at Surya. Surya laughed as if the sight was interesting.
[However, it is only a human story.]
Surya released a bright light as he used the stories he accumulated over thousands of years. It was a status that couldn’t be resisted. Yoo Jonghyuk’s short history was shaking in front of those formidable years.
[Foolish humans who don’t know that a god’s power is so high.]
The sunlight that melted everything poured towards Yoo Jonghyuk.
***
The scene of the industrial complex being destroyed by the constellations. Incarnations died without being able to rebel. Some people who felt desperate at the sudden disaster appeared up close on the screen. The most horrifying thing was that a man who was covered in injuries and lost one arm was still fighting.
[The constellation ‘Demon-like Judge of Fire’ is furious!]
[The constellation ‘Queen of the Darkest Spring’ is sorry for the incarnation ‘Yoo Jonghyuk’.]
[The constellation ‘Prisoner of the Golden Headband’ is pointing a finger to the cowardly constellations!]
[Many constellations are complaining about the constellations on the battlefield!]
There were countless indirect messages from the constellations and the dokkaebi of the bureau were listening to them. Among them was Bihyung, the dokkaebi in charge of the Demon King Selection.
[What the hell do you mean by this?]
He was rarely angry or agitated but now he had the same mind as the constellations in his channel.
[The second game is the victory of the Yoo Jonghyuk – Kim Dokja Industrial Complex! There was a time difference but there is nothing to worry about. Then why not announce the winner?!]
Shortly after the second game, Bihyung contacted the bureau’s approval team directly. However, the only answer he got in return was ‘it is being prepared.’
In the end, the last connection Bihyung had was Baram, the next great dokkaebi candidate. There was a crackling sound and Baram’s face appeared on the screen.
[This is the decision of the bureau.]
The decision of the bureau. They were magic words.
‘This is the bureau’s decision.’
‘This is the bureau’s decision.’
[Baram. This is the main scenario.]
There were some things that even the bureau couldn’t touch.
[Since when did the bureau interfere with the development of the main scenario? It is also a scenario where a giant story is involved… Baram, don’t you know what will happen if you do this?]
Baram didn’t answer.
[Please tell me. Who the hell did this? Is it one of your superiors?]
Bihyung glanced at Dokgak on the screen. It was clear that Dokgak was associated with this situation. However, this wasn’t something that could be done by one or two senior dokkaebis. The silent Baram opened his mouth.
[…Are you doubting the ‘great dokkaebis’ right now?]
[Is there any other streamer who can do this beside them?]
[Bihyung, please wake up. Why would they do this?]
[I don’t know. Perhaps some bribes were received.]
Baram frowned.
[The great dokkaebis aren’t bound by such private understandings.]
[Then why is this happening? Baram, you must know something!]
[Bihyung.]
Bihyung instantly flinched. Baram’s voice was furious. Bihyung thought there would be a strict scolding but unexpectedly, Baram just relaxed. It was as if he understood Bihyung. Baram on the screen was also watching the scenes of the Demon King Selection. Baram’s lips slowly opened.
[Yes, maybe one of the great dokkaebis created this ‘delay’, as you said.]
[Then…]
[However, even a great dokkaebi can only do it up to there. It is impossible for a great dokkaebi to endure the storm that will be created from intervening in a scenario of this magnitude.]
[…So who did it?]
At this moment, there was a loud noise and the ceiling of the bureau shook. It sounded like a huge dragon passing by. It was the sound of ‘probability’ moving.
Bihyung’s expression hardened.
[Don’t tell me… something so ridiculous…]
[Do you understand now?]
The existence that could move this probability. There was only one such existence in the Star Stream. He didn’t even know if it should be called an ‘existence.’
Baram drove in the wedge. [The will of the Star Stream wanted this.]
[This is ridiculous!]
[There is no other way to explain it.]
Bihyung’s words were taken away and he stared blankly at the screen. Kim Dokja’s party was shown on the screen.
Originally, they should be excited about winning. Now they looked terrible as they lay on the ground.
It was a confrontation with constellations supported by the nebula. It was a ridiculous fight from the beginning but the party fought well. They played a game against powerful constellations and finally won the competition that gave them a giant story. Now they were going to be losers just because there wasn’t a ‘winner announcement.’
It was just because the Star Stream wanted this. Resentment mixed with anger filled Bihyung’s eyes.
[Then… why does a streamer exist?]
It was the first time Bihyung felt helplessness since becoming a dokkaebi. His fingertips trembled as the parts of the scenario he touched fell.
[If we can’t stop this nonsensical development… what are the streamers of this world worth?]
[Bihyung.]
Baram saw Bihyung’s sad eyes and slowly spoke.
[Streamers are also part of the story.]
The desperate Bihyung stared at the screen. Yoo Jonghyuk was gradually melting in the dazzling sunlight. Now the story was leaving the streamer’s hand.
Thus, there was only one thing to believe in.
[Many constellations are looking at one constellation.]
The man on Lee Hyunsung’s back was shaking. On the screen, the man was slowly opening his eyes.
[Baat! Baaat! Baaaaat!]
My cheeks hurt.
[
Baaaaat!]
There was a bit more pain. I felt something violently shaking in my arms. I opened my eyes at the exact moment the earth let out a tremendous ringing sound. I reflexively raised my head and could see brilliant flashes of light. The sparks of probability in the sky were falling like lightning strikes all over the Demon World.
“Dokja-ssi?”
I woke up the moment I heard Yoo Sangah’s voice. Like a disconnected current being reconnected, thoughts started to flow through my head.
There were broken incarnation bodies everywhere. No matter how I looked, this wasn’t the Mythical Battlefield. All the fallen bodies were living human beings. The industrial complex being torn apart by the Thunder Eating Bird could be seen.
“Did the constellations come?”
Yoo Sangah, who was about to say something, wiped her bloody cheeks and nodded. “…Yes.”
A system message was floating in the air while the party members were in tatters.
“The winner still hasn’t been announced.”
It was a situation I expected thanks to the last message of Yoo Jonghyuk in the library. However, I didn’t expect the situation to be so serious.
“Kuk…”
Lee Hyunsung suffered a serious injury on his side and staggered. I quickly got off Lee Hyunsung’s back and bought a few recovery items from the Dokkaebi Bag.
I gave the Great Return Pill to Lee Hyunsung and Yoo Sangah, who were the most seriously injured. Shin Yoosung had no wounds but her magic power was depleted, so I gave her an advanced magic power recovery medicine. Trauma medicine was given to Han Myungoh, Breaking the Sky Master and Jang Hayoung. It cost over 400,000 coins but now wasn’t the time to worry about that.
“Ahjussi…”
Shin Yoosung drank the potion and looked up at me while leaning against the rock. I looked at Shin Yoosung for a moment before saying, “You should rest here. By the way…”
In a distance place, the deafening roar of the constellations was shaking the earth. I could tell the number exceeded 12 just by the ‘status.’ At this moment, I had an ominous feeling.
…The constellations were gathered so how could the party members flee to here?
“Yoo Jonghyuk…”
None of the party members answered. I looked around the battlefield as an explosion occurred. Everyone except for Yoo Jonghyuk was here. In addition, someone was fighting the constellations.
[The ‘Fourth Wall’ is shaking faintly.]
“That stupid bastard…”
“Ahjussi! No!” Shin Yoosung clung to my waist when I tried to run forward. “Ahjussi will die. You’ll die there.”
She was an always straightforward and brave child. Fear was deeply permeated in the child’s eyes. Shin Yoosung burst into tears as I pulled away from her. In the saturated battlefield, the tears scattered like dust. Perhaps this child had seen it. It was the fear of a giant story that humans could never overcome.
“Please take care of Yoosung.”
I left Shin Yoosung to Jang Hayoung who was in a good condition and activated Way of the Wind. I heard a voice calling out to me from behind but had no time to turn around.
I moved forward and the pressure of the ‘status’ bursting from the centre of the battlefield became stronger. It was a fearsome storm of magic that I had never experienced before. The centre definitely contained Yoo Jonghyuk.
「 Kim Dokja thought: Is there a way? 」
The pages of Ways of Destruction flashed in my head.
「It isn’t possible. 」
「That method is too unreasonable. 」
I bit my lips. I predicted that this situation might happen. However, the time passed too quickly and I had been asleep for too long.
I was late. Yoo Jonghyuk was still far away and the wind wasn’t on my side. I could buy a new skill from the Dokkaebi Bag but I can’t guarantee its utilization.
In the end, I made a decision.
“I will invest three million coins into my strength, physique, agility and magic power.”
[Your total stats have grown abnormally!]
[The coins you invested have allowed you to cross the stats limit of the scenario.]
[A fuller probability will release some of the stat constraints for this scenario.]
[The growth of the stats value compared to the invested coins will be randomly adjusted.]
A tremendous amount of sparks jumped from my body. It felt like my muscles were tearing and growing bigger. There was the feeling of my bone density changing and a terrible pain came over me.
“Cough…”
I had put it off until now due to the poor cost to value ratio but there was no other way.
[Your mind can’t cope with your evolving incarnation body.]
[The exclusive skill ‘Fourth Wall’ is activated!]
[Your incarnation body is evolving to a new level!]
Since the early scenarios, the ‘overall stats’ didn’t have a big influence on combat. It was because stories, stigmas and skills had much more influence.
In addition, since the number of coins per level after level 100 was exponentially larger, it was more advantageous to buy a skill using the same amount of coins. Now the situation was different.
[All your stats have exceeded 200!]
[Your incarnation body can handle a bigger ‘status.’]
I needed a strong body, not a powerful skill.
[Your agility has reduced the air resistance.]
[Magic power is opening up the blocked bloodstream.]
A huge amount of coins was transforming my incarnation body.
[Your strength is causing an explosive change!]
The frequency of my footsteps and the speed at which the landscape passed in my vision changed drastically.
“Yoo Jonghyuk!”
Of course, it was impossible to surpass the constellations or transcendents. Still, it was enough to confront them for a while.
[Many constellations are envying your incarnation body.]
I crossed the wilderness at a tremendous speed and the centre of the battlefield finally entered my eyes. At the centre, I could see a dying person.
“You idiot! What are you doing?”
In front of Surya’s radiant light, Yoo Jonghyuk was dying. I didn’t know where his left arm had gone and steam was rising from his charred body. Even so, Yoo Jonghyuk was gripping the Black Demon Sword without moving an inch. Yoo Jonghyuk’s head moved slowly towards me. His voice wasn’t heard, as if he had no strength to open his lips.
[The ‘Fourth Wall’ is greatly shaken.]
The words of the Mass Production Maker came to mind. The constellations were also just part of this great story. They were also lonely and had to do these things.
…Bullshit.
[Get lost!]
The Founder of Humanity stood in front of me and wielded the Primitive Spear.
[The exclusive skill ‘Electrification’ Lv. 12 (+2) has been activated.]
White lightning exploded from my fist and the battlefield filled with a blue light.
[Kuaaack!]
The confused constellations supported the thrown back Manu and raised their status. The magic power poured towards me like a tsunami. My strengthened body withstood the mighty power of the constellations.
The flesh of my fist cracked and blood flowed down but it was still bearable. The constellations blinked as the dust settled down. They didn’t know I had this much power and were shocked.
[Stop him!]
A blue-white energy flew towards the constellations. In an instant, there were abrasions on my back and thighs as well as a long stab in my side.
“Yoo Jonghyuk!”
My cry didn’t reach him properly. Yoo Jonghyuk had fallen to his knees and his life was now flickering. No magic power could be felt from him. Yoo Jonghyuk was dying.
I held my breath and then shouted with the greatest true voice possible. [Asmodeus!]
The true voice burst out and the constellations blocked their ears for a moment. The great-grade constellations couldn’t stop and tears poured from my eyes. I shouted again.
[If you are a demon king, keep your promise!]
The situation was so big that I didn’t expect much. He was a shrewd guy and should know how dangerous it was to take my side right now. However, it was Asmodeus…
As if waiting, one star in the sky flashed. There was a storm coming in and something was descending.
[The Demon King of Lust and Fury has appeared in this world!]
A tremendous probability was flowing and a colossal presence was manifesting before my eyes as an incarnation body. A little girl surrounded by a dark aura raised her head.
It was the king of the Demon World who immediately subdued the transcendent Yoo Jonghyuk. Later, he would join one of the worst organizations in the world, ‘ the Seekers of the End.’
[D-Demon king!]
The 32nd demon king, Asmodeus started running wild.
[Ahahahahahat!]
He laughed and a huge rake appeared at the fingers of the demon king. Asmodeus’ ‘Bloody Grip’ scraped through the area and tore at the constellations.
[Kuaaaack!]
[The mad demon king!]
[What the hell is this?]
The constellations turned their gaze towards me and I triggered Way of the Wind to snatch Yoo Jonghyuk.
[Chase him!]
The constellations started running but my strengthened incarnation body was a bit faster than them. I ran with all my strength while carrying Yoo Jonghyuk on my shoulder. “Wake up please.”
Yoo Jonghyuk was barely breathing. The weight of his body was lighter than usual. He had suffered such severe pain that even the skeleton of his body seemed changed. I listened to his gradually fading heart beat and cried out, “Hey, don’t mess around! You can recover! Do something!”
However, Yoo Jonghyuk didn’t move. I called out to Biyoo and bought a few more Great Return Pills. My left hand supported his body while my right hand poured the pills into Yoo Jonghyuk’s mouth.
No effect was visible. He didn’t have the strength to swallow it. His breathing slowed and became distant. The tips of Yoo Jonghyuk’s toes were breaking and his body was disappearing.
I used Way of the Wind to wrap around the debris and prevent them from escaping. Even so, I couldn’t prevent the dim light from emerging from his heart.
I was well aware of this phenomenon. I had read the scene a few hundred times and had to know what it was.
「 Yoo Jonghyuk had a thought. 」
“Don’t think about it.”
「 This life ends here. 」
“Dammit! Don’t think about it!”
Story fragments were falling from Yoo Jonghyuk’s cheeks. I was scared of this story and slapped his cheek before crying out to the air.
“Shit! Don’t go back! You jerk, leave him alone!”
[The sponsor of incarnation ‘Yoo Jonghyuk’ is looking at you.]
“You can still survive! This round isn’t over! You can fight back against this guy! I can save you!”
Yoo Jonghyuk’s sponsor was silent. This guy always did the same thing. He watched Yoo Jonghyuk suffering from death. He placed the soul of a hopelessly broken man back into the world line of the past.
[The stigma ‘Regression Lv. 3’ has been activated!]
It was cruel. Was this really how it ended? How did I get here? Would Yoo Jonghyuk really die here?
Then a single line emerged.
[Incarnation ‘Yoo Jonghyuk’ is looking at his sponsor.]
“…Yoo Jonghyuk?”
Yoo Jonghyuk, who became so ragged that his shape couldn’t be recognized, stared at his sponsor with a single bloody eye. Sparks appeared around his disappearing body.
[Incarnation ‘Yoo Jonghyuk’ is resisting his sponsor.]
[All of the stories of incarnation ‘Yoo Jonghyuk’ is resisting death.]
This was something I had never seen in any round.
[The incarnation ‘Yoo Jonghyuk’ has refused to regress.]
Yoo Jonghyuk’s entire body was trembling.
「…I can’t die. 」
「 I will never die here. 」
Yoo Jonghyuk’s desperate will was being conveyed through Omniscient Reader’s Viewpoint.
“Hey, you…”
This Yoo Jonghyuk refused to ‘regress.’
[The sponsor of incarnation ‘Yoo Jonghyuk’ is looking at his incarnation.]
Yoo Jonghyuk’s sponsor was silent as this situation occurred for the first time. It was a mysterious silence. It seemed to be both angry and sad. Or perhaps there was no response. Not long after that, the gaze on Yoo Jonghyuk disappeared.
[The stigma ‘Regression Lv. 3’ has been cancelled.]
Crazy, something like this was possible. The light of the stigma disappeared and Yoo Jonghyuk once again sagged down. His barely opened eyes closed and his mouth was mumbling something. I felt his desperate will to live. It was Yoo Jonghyuk’s unique commitment to somehow survive.
Yoo Jonghyuk’s thoughts were heard in my head.
「 Break it down. So I can eat. 」
I pulled out another Great Return Pill, turned it to powder and poured it into his mouth. The stories of the fallen man slowly stopped collapsing.
“…It’s fine.”
Yoo Jonghyuk was betting everything into this round. He decided to forsake the premise that it was okay to fail a few times and to remain in this world. Perhaps he had lost consciousness but Yoo Jonghyuk didn’t say anything else. Instead, the stories wrapped around Yoo Jonghyuk’s body shone brightly.
[The story ‘Life and Death Companions’ wants to continue.]
Life and Death Companions. It was a story that didn’t exist for Yoo Jonghyuk in the original novel.
「 “What is your relationship with Yoo Jonghyuk?”
“We are life and death companions. 」
It was at Chungmuro. It was clearly the conversation I had with Gong Pildu. I couldn’t help laughing. Now we would really live together or die together.
I ran while holding on tightly to Yoo Jonghyuk. My party members shouting in the distance could be seen.
I felt a hot heat behind me. Together with a fierce wind, fireballs narrowly brushed over my head. The chasing constellations were already right behind me.
[Did you call the demon king? Do you know what you have done?]
The constellations roared as a formidable aura poured towards me.
[Stupid bastard. Now the 73rd Demon Realm will perish!]
I shouted at Lee Hyunsung in front of me instead of replying to them. “Lee Hyunsung-ssi!”
Yoo Jonghyuk’s body flew through the air and Lee Hyunsung caught him. At the same time, I turned around and reflexively punched out. A running constellation collided with me and screamed.
Electrification struck the tail of the Scorpion Goddess and then Unbroken Faith slashed at the Thunder Eating Bird. The Blade of Faith absorbed power and shone brightly. Blood splashed and I unleashed with all the power of Electrification.
Omniscient Reader's Viewpoint is really just an Adventure Action Romance love story, the kind we always wanted. The kind that can be made into an anime. Especially this part here:
Yoo Jonghyuk was watching me. His eyes asked what I was going to do. I said to him, “…Yoo Jonghyuk. Do you remember the nebula we made? Kim Dokja’s Company.”
It wasn’t simply to save my mother. Everything would end if I belonged to a nebula.
There was no way I could overcome the unfair contract with them and I would never be able to reach the end of the story.
“…You still want to use that name.” Yoo Jonghyuk frowned as he moved close to me and pulled out a sword. “I will choose the name of the nebula.”
I smiled at the thought that Yoo Jonghyuk was joking. The energy of transcendence could be felt by my side. It was strangely relieving despite the presence of a person who had long surpassed my scale.
It might be because I felt like we were standing on the same horizon for the first time since the scenario began.
I declared towards the stars in the night sky. “I won’t bow to your fate.”
I pointed my sword towards those silent gazes.
“I will decide my story.”
Like, it's so Action Adventure Romance. It's so Action Adventure Romantic. The main character stands with his love interest who's his favourite character of his favourite story, as equals, and points his sword to the opponents in the sky and declares he won't bow to their fate and that he will decide his story. I can totally imagine this scene as an anime.
And that’s about it, even without the going to this world line and that world line and the 0th turn, Kim Dokja’s and Yoo Joonghyuk’s relationship is just very romantic, and is the Action Adventure Romance in ORV, Omniscient Reader’s Viewpoint.
A03 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/47325238
#omniscient reader's viewpoint#orv#kdj#yjh#kim dokja#yoo joonghyuk#kdj x yjh#yjh x kdj#dokhyuk#dokjoong#joongdok#orv analysis
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Some Things We Know Canonically About Nikolai
He can sew (since he sewed that skin shirt).
His Japanese is proficient enough for him to be able to pass as a Japanese secretary for six months, meaning that his grammar, tones, reading, writing, typing, and mannerisms are all native-level.
He can not only connect space with his Ability, but fuse one object into another if his Ability's output space is connected to a solid object (Atsushi's leg into concrete as the example).
He knew Fyodor before Fyodor was as proficient in Japanese as he is now (since Fyodor is still learning Japanese in the omake).
He knew Fyodor at least semi-well before the plot of Sunday Tragedy (both his recollection to Sigma and various omakes confirm this).
He isn't very familiar with the concept of a band (says, "It's like an orchestra, right?" when Sigma mentions a band in an omake).
He feels guilt and remorse when he kills people (according to himself).
He knew about Atsushi's Ability before they met (called Atsushi "Tiger Boy" when they first met, said that the rumours about his were true, and might have stabbed him knowing about Atsushi's regenerative ability).
He knew about Dazai's Ability too (and tested whether he could bring Dazai through a portal anyway).
He doesn't seem interested in killing people who aren't "targets", or at least, that's his reason he gives to Atsushi for why he kept him alive. I don't think he kills indiscriminately.
Nikolai envies people who are in the cage but can't see it, possibly meaning that he wishes he didn't see it at all, and that he's only trying to escape because he can't help but know it's there (meaning he doesn't think he chooses to see the world this way).
Nikolai is drawn to, or at least thinks very highly of, people who help others and do the right thing, even at the expense of themselves (based on what he says to the ADA right before he's sawed in half).
He can perform some sort of auto-blood-transfusion-thing, or "loop the blood back into [someone's] body" (he did it with Sigma).
Dazai can fall through one of Nikolai's space connection portal things, meaning that the connected spaces in each of the rooms themselves somehow aren't being touched by his Ability (or at least, the visible connected spaces outside of his cape are only connected to his Ability via the portal walls, so the space connection process must happen within his Ability's space, and not in the "real world"). This also has to imply that either Nikolai can move an object through two connected spaces without having the object touch his cape, or that his cape isn't actually connected to his Ability (though second option seems very unlikely, the portal Dazai falls through is connected to the ceiling of the room that Nikolai is in, which he can't touch, so he really may be able to connect space without it strictly being through his cape, as opposed to what was implied in every instance before).
His right eye seems to turn pitch black when he's overtly lying/putting on an act, and looks more 'clear' when he's being more truthful.
Some Things That Could be Interpreted
He may have helped Fyodor with Japanese at some point (based on how you interpret his Japanese pun omake moments).
He may be only partially/mostly used to modern society, depending on how you interpret his historically-inspired attire and not knowing what a band is.
He doesn't derive any pleasure at all from killing or hurting people (not outright stated but implied, from what I can tell from his expressions, the "enjoyment" in such activities seems entirely feigned).
He might not be interested in maiming people who aren't targets, since he probably knew about Atsushi's regenerative ability beforehand, though that might not be the case. It depends on whether or not shooting Tonan was part of a plan, I think.
He might not be interested in playing certain characters outside of their roles. For example, for Atsushi, who isn't a target but is part of the ADA, he drops the clown persona for a moment. He does it again for Tonan right before he releases him. Though there isn't much to go on, it could be interpreted here that he doesn't play acts for people said acts aren't originally meant for.
He might see people who are "in the cage" similar to actors on a sort of improv stage. If you think of his secretary act as being who he needed to be to have Tonan cooperate (and thanking Tonan twice for pretty much acting exactly as planned), then it could be similar to him thinking that Akaky Akakievich's superiors interacted with him exactly as they should, or if not as they should morally, then add they should societally, which ultimately trumps morality. All of this, Nikolai would think of as detached from himself, yet as he's still in the cage physically, and not yet even out (can only see the bars where others can't), he could watch and muse at all these goings on, and when it comes to him having to interact with those almost scripted personalities, he might script a personality for himself, working within the play that people unintentionally mould themselves into, being the exact sort of person that they need to interact with in order for them to make his desired result happen. (In action, this would be him being the meek, simpleminded, pitiful secretary, who seems only to exist in order to be briefly bullied and ordered by his superior, the Minister of Justice. And Tonan would have every right to treat the Secretary this way, would even be expected to, and it's such a normal scene that neither Tonan nor anyone else would think anything of it, they'd simply gaze over their interactions as though they were part of the wallpaper, and it would give Nikolai plenty of leeway to do whatever he needed to do in the government. It's also present in how he talks about being the sort of person the people he's killed needing to see, for them to think of him as a psychopath in order to find peace, so he played a psychopath for them {Tonan actually fits this description of needing it, too, and if you read it back, I think that exact interaction Nikolai described to Atsushi was happening when Nikolai untied Tonan}.
And yet he breaks the act, which doesn't fit his script at all, and you can see the moment it all slips from an orchestrated play into reality, if only for a moment.
Though I suppose there's also some irony here, that when Nikolai's breaking his personal script, he's saying lines scripted for him in the Book.)
Considering the way he thanks Tonan for his help, although somewhat mocking, I think enough in his expression when he's talking about the birdcage at Tonan to imply that he doesn't take how Tonan treated his Secretary persona personally (in his "I envy you" speech).
The particular way he always positions/moves his hands could be indicative of something, but of what seems completely open to interpretation.
Considering what he knew about Atsushi and Dazai's Abilities, he may know all of the ADA's Abilities.
#Oct. 2022#BSD#BSD Nikolai#BSD Gogol#BSD Nikolai Gogol#bsd gogol nikolai#bsd gogol theory#BSD Gogol analysis#BSD analysis#bsd nikolai theory#bsd nikolai hcs#BSD Nikolai analysis#might add more later#this is just a quick thing i wanted to post to get my thoughts together#and maybe help someone too
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I think what a lot of people maybe don’t understand about Levi’s final interaction with Hange is that, it wasn’t because he was MORE upset about her impending sacrifice than any of his other comrades, including Erwin, it was simply that it was basically the “straw that broke the camel’s back”. I keep seeing people talk about how this situation was different than the one with Erwin, because Levi ordered Erwin to make the charge with the new recruits, while he had to be convinced by Hange to let her go. The problem I have with this framing of it is that it makes it seem like Levi didn’t feel equally upset at having to let Erwin sacrifice himself. I feel like this goes back to my posts about the problems with shipping, and how it skews a person’s ability to objectively view what’s going on in any given scene or situation of the story. Levi was OBVIOUSLY deeply upset at having to let Erwin go. You can see that in the build up, and even the aftermath to him giving the order. He trails after Erwin as Erwin explains his plan, and he has a similarly resigned and grief stricken look on his face during the course of it, before he finally accepts it and resolves himself to give Erwin the order, that familiar, stoic mask coming down over his face.
But if you don’t think that this was every bit as hard for Levi as letting Hange go, well, I just have to say I don’t think you understand Levi’s character at all. The entire core of Levi’s character revolves around his need to use his strength to help people. He basically defines himself and his worth by whether he can save people’s lives or not. And it’s absolutely devastating to him every time he can’t. That’s the point. There’s nothing worse for Levi than to have to accept there’s nothing he can do to save the life of someone he cares about, or even just a strangers life. There’s nothing more upsetting to him than death in general. He wants desperately to prevent it whenever he can. It’s why he constantly orders his soldiers not to die. It’s why he tried to take on the burden of killing as many of the five meter titans Zeke sent their way as he could, so that the new recruits wouldn’t have to engage and get killed, and why he wanted so badly to get to the other side of the wall in Shinganshina to help Hange and her squad. It’s why Levi was so upset during the battle with the Female Titan in Trost, when he couldn’t join in and prevent others from getting hurt or killed. Levi’s loathes death. It’s why I always say he’s the character in AoT that’s most representative of the sanctity of life, and the value inherent in it, and why he’s also the character that most closely embodies the classic hero. Some might call that ironic, given Levi’s also maybe the most violent character in AoT, other than Eren. But then, that’s just further proof of his actual complexity and depth as a character. That Levi both understands and accepts the brutal and unforgiving reality of the world and of nature, while at the same time, finding it so objectionable and wishing with all his heart to change it in whatever way he can. He embodies the very notion of valuing life and treating it as something worth protecting and preserving. It’s also why I always say, out of everyone in AoT, Levi’s suffered and sacrificed maybe the most, exactly because he constantly has to set aside his revulsion and horror at death in the hope of achieving freedom for humanity. And not just freedom from the walls, but to gain freedom of choice and freedom of living. He knows there’s nothing he can do to stop people from killing each other. That’s human nature and he was raised in the bleakness of that reality. But like he tells Historia and the rest of the 104th, he can at least stop them from losing their lives to something outside of their control and own choices. He wants to prevent death in any way he can. He wants to save lives. Yet he has to make that choice again and again and again, to let others die so that more people can live. The burden and damage this causes to Levi can’t be overstated, and yet is rarely, I think, understood or appreciated.
Back to my original point. He didn’t order Erwin to his death with cold-hearted resolve. He just ordered him with simple resolve, because that’s what Levi always does. He accepts reality and stiffens himself against his emotions so that he can carry on with his duty. But he doesn’t stop feeling, and that resolve doesn’t indicate a lack of emotion or of being affected on Levi’s part. It’s a simple putting away of his emotions, into a place inside of himself where they won’t reach the surface and impair his judgment. What makes the situation with Hange different, isn’t that he cared more about Hange than Erwin, or was more distraught at her death than Erwin’s. It’s that it had just simply reached a tipping point for Levi. Hange was the last remaining veteran beside Levi himself. Everyone else was gone. Countless other comrades had died in the service of a dream which had turned into an outright nightmare. Levi himself was in the totally unfamiliar position of not being able to do much physically to help, and he was about to lose the last, real friend he had in the world. His show of emotion in the scene with Hange, and afterward, is a symptom of Levi’s resolve finally beginning to crack under the weight of years upon years of impossible grief and setting aside his own, natural aversion to death in service to an impossible to achieve goal. It was a culmination of EVERY loss he’d experienced and suffered up to that point. It was the burden of every life he’d been unable to save bearing down on him. Hange was simply the final blow which at last had Levi buckling under the assault of his own trauma. That’s not to say Hange’s death wasn’t every bit as awful and impactful and heartbreaking for Levi as Erwin’s, or anyone else’. Of course it was. But again, I feel like people’s desire to believe Levi and Hange are in some sort of romantic relationship often obscures their ability to read things accurately, and in turn, it makes Levi out to be somehow callous or unfeeling toward others of his comrades and their deaths, when he never, EVER was.
And yet still, somehow, Levi DOES manage to resolve himself, even after Hange’s death. He begins to buckle, but he never does quite break. People are complaining about the most recent episode of AoT, and Levi’s “angry eyes” after he accepts Hange’s sacrifice. Of course, the art style doesn’t convey the subtle sadness in Levi’s expression as well as Isayama’s illustrations. But Levi isn’t angry, and I don’t think the animation at all conveys or intended to convey that he is either. He’s resolved. We see that same resolve in the manga panels too, that coming down of the stoic mask, just like with Erwin, just like with his old squad, just like with the soldiers in the forest, etc... He knows he has to be resolved, because he isn’t done fighting for everyone else’ lives and dreams. We see that resolve manifest as stoicism, or a hardened look. But never once would someone who knew the first thing about Levi’s character think it was because he felt indifferent or hateful or angry. They would know it’s simply Levi’s way of coping with his pain in the service of his duty and in the face of impossible odds. It’s his way of continuing to fight.
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