#unless u know a ton of context that is
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ok i wish i could explain d20 things to my non-d20 fan friends but it’s just too hard. talking about any one character or moment requires six hours of explaining the context
#like OBV u can watch tons of d20 clips online without context and enjoy them#as i often did#the clips dropout socials post are pretty good but likee#to actually get it its like. god. fuck#so itll be like#i write fic about sid and barry#but u dont get it unless u understand like.#theyre gunner channel buddies and#all of their interactions#and knowing sids character as the only android of her line#and barry as the lonely clone#etc etc etc#and thus it is far harder to drag any of my friends into d20 bc i simply. its just hard
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FOOLISH ONE ! — LUKE HUGHES
— “stop checking your mailbox for confessions of love that ain’t never gonna come,”
pairing; slytherin!luke x fem!hufflepuff!reader
genre; angst at beginning, secret baby trope, exes to lovers, blackcat!luke, golden retriever!reader
summary; it’s been a little over a year since luke broke things off with yn to go to umich. she still hopes to hear from him someday, a confession of his love, yet it never happens. luke doesn’t know, however, it’s not just her waiting for him.
author’s note; didn’t reread this so there may be grammar mistakes and typos! lmk if u guys want to see more rowden and lukey content
✸ SLYTHERIN!LUKE MASTERLIST (read first for more context on yn and luke’s relationship)
When Luke broke things off with you to go play hockey in umich, you’d thought he’d at least try to keep in contact.
He did say he was going to visit every year. But that was a total fat lie. Luke Hughes did not visit, he didn’t even bother writing you a message.
You couldn’t be mad. You somewhat understood it from his point of view. He was passionate about hockey, just as he’d always been about Quidditch when the two of you were still teenagers at Hogwarts. Luke Hughes did not owe you anything, he was just your ex.
And also.. maybe.. possibly.. the father of your baby. No, he definitely was. The boy had golden curls just like his father when he was younger.
“Rowden!” You called out, patting your lap to let your baby know where to go.
Rowden Quintin Hughes. You had decided to name Rowden after Jack and Quinn, the two boys who accepted you as their little sister the day their brother started dating you.
Rowden was an exact replica of his father, his cute chubby cheeks and his blonde curls making his appearance ten times cuter than he already was. You loved your baby, and you knew if Luke knew of him, he would to.
But was it selfish for you not to tell Luke? That you found out you were two months pregnant when he left for the airport? Maybe a part of you wanted to keep it a secret, just you and Rowden for a little while.
“Rowdy baby,” you coo, smothering his cheek with kisses that made the baby gurgle happily.
“He’s a happy baby today, isn’t he?” Kielle walks into your living room, carrying a baby of her own.
See, the funny thing was, you and Kielle actually got pregnant around the same time. Of course, Mark was already aware of his son, and always came on his school breaks to visit him and his girlfriend.
You and Kielle decided to move in with each other after finding out you were both becoming mothers, and the rest was history. Tons of morning sickness, mood swings, and late night cravings. For a while, both of your guy’s best friends was Doordash. Mark had always ordered it, making sure his girlfriend and baby were well fed.
Mark knew about Rowden, but you and Kielle begged him to keep it a secret. He was reluctant at first; knowing if he was in Luke’s shoes, he would want to know. But he decided that it wasn’t his choice to make whether or not to tell him, so he kept it a secret from his best friend.
“Theo, say hi to Rowdy, baby!” Kielle says, making her way over to the two of you. “Rowdy’s so quiet isn’t he?”
“Yes,” you nod, “suppose he’s like Luke. Never talks unless he’s supposed to.”
Kielle scrolls through her phone for a bit, breastfeeding Theo while she’s at it. A certain picture makes her wince.
“What’s wrong Kie?” You ask, curious to see what she’s looking at.
She quickly pulls her phone to her chest, shaking her head. “Nothing you have to worry about Y/N. Look, I think Rowdy’s falling asleep.”
It was true. Rowden was snoozing off in your arms, a content smile settled on his face. He was the cutest baby, your baby, you still couldn’t believe it till this day.
“Okay Theo, time to sleep baby.” Kielle carries him to her room, and you’re left alone with a sleeping Rowden. Carefully, you take him into your room, placing him in his crib.
Now it was time for you to have personal time. You decide to spend it scrolling through social media for thirty minutes, looking at what your old classmates were up to. A certain picture catches your vision, and you swore your heart almost drops.
It’s Luke’s post. And on it was of him placing his arm around a girl, captioning it Going Blue with the fave! 💙
You didn’t know how to feel. First, Luke hadn’t spoken to you since the day he took off to Michigan, and now, he’s posing and writing a intimate caption with a girl? Could he break your heart any more?
You didn’t even realize you’re crying until Kielle comes in with tissues, frowning. “I take it you saw the post?”
You only shakily nod, not wanting to speak.
“It’s okay Y/N, he doesn’t deserve you.”
But he does. And you’ll let him have you if he wanted you back. You always will.
When you finally fall asleep, snoring softly with the baby monitor by your side, that’s when Kielle thinks she’s had enough.
There was no way her best friend, Luke motherfucking Hughes, was going to hurt her other best friend like that. She wouldn’t allow it.
“Mark? Cmon pick up,” she says, chewing on her nails nervously.
“Baby? What’s wrong?” Mark’s voice automatically shifts to concern over the phone, seeing his girlfriend’s upset face. “Is there something wrong with Theo? Do I need to fly there baby?”
“No Marky, there’s nothing wrong, well, not with us.”
“Then why’d you call?”
“You seriously need to tell Luke to get his shit together Mark, I’m serious. He’s been making poor Y/N cry so much, it’s not good for her or Rowden. I seriously don’t know what the fuck is going through Luke’s head, especially since he was so inlove with her and now he won’t even text her?”
Mark sighs, watching his girlfriend become pissed off as each minute passes. “The Instagram post, right? Listen, I’m not justifying any of his behavior but the girl, she’s just one of the girls from the sororities who we’re friends with. Nothing more, I promise. In fact, I’m pretty sure Luke is still hungover on Y/N. Wont talk about her.”
Kielle’s anger subsides, but it’s still apparent. “Just a girl from one of the sororities huh?”
“Yes baby, I promise. I wouldn’t lie to you. If anything, I want Y/N and Luke back together. They were so good.”
“They were Marky, they were.”
Mark thinks for a minute, before an idea pops into his head. “Kiel baby,”
“Hm?”
“I have an idea. You know how winter break is in a few days and I’m coming? How about I bring Luke? I’ll just tell him that we’re all catching up. He doesn’t know Y/N lives with you.”
Kielle ponders, then nods slowly. “I just want them back together, Mark. They made each other better and I really can’t stand Y/N being so upset, especially since she has Rowden to take care of now.”
Mark smiles, reassuring her everything will be fine. “How’s Rowdy by the way?”
“He’s good. Not fussy like our Theo. He reminds me of Luke, blonde curls, quiet, and sometimes, he’s all smiley. It’s adorable.”
“Yeah, I just wish Luke was there to see Rowdy when he was first born.”
“Me too.”
The next few days passed by quickly, and you’re reminded that Mark is coming. Kielle is all excited, cleaning and making food the entire day as you watched Theo and Rowden.
The doorbell rings. Once, twice, and another six times because Mark just loves to mess with you two.
“I’ll get it,” you say as Kielle takes off her apron. “You watch the boys.”
When you open the door, you expect to see a smiley Mark, all giddy to see his son again. There he was, all giddy like you had imagined; only this time, a tall figure stands next to him.
A tall, curly haired, all too familiar figure stands right next to Mark. You don’t have to think twice about knowing who it is. It’s Luke Hughes.
“Luke, you’re here..” you say, and the wavering of your voice doesn’t go missed by the boy.
He always remembered tiny details about you due to his ability to memorize and his attentive personality.
“I am,” he says awkwardly, “may we come in?”
“Uh.. yes, of course!”
You don’t know how you’re gonna hide Rowden from Luke. Or, you could just make a run for it now. Maybe it wasn’t such a bad idea to run away from your problems.
“Dude, why didn’t you tell me she was here?!” You hear Luke quietly whisper—which wasn’t really quiet because you had heard everything.
“My bad! I thought it was just Kielle!”
You knew Mark was lying. And you had a stinging feeling that Kielle was in on the lie too.
“Where’s Theo?” Luke’s head scans around the room, smiling brightly when he sees his best friend’s son. “Hi Theo! It’s your uncle Luke.”
He notices Rowden on the floor next to Theo, laying on his back and sucking on his thumb.
Luke raises his eyebrows at this. Blonde, curly hair. Mark was neither of this. If Luke wasn’t going crazy, he would’ve thought it was his son. Was it?
“And who’s this tiny fella?” Luke asks, softly picking Rowden up with as much gentleness as he possibly can. He had a sinking feeling that there was more to the baby than meets the eye.
“Rowden,” you say quietly. The familiar name of his brother makes Luke’s ears perk up.
“Rowden?”
“Rowden Quintin Hughes.”
It’s as if the world had paused. Come to a stop. Luke’s heart freezes for a moment, all the emotions he had kept pushed back into the back of his head came crawling out.
“Rowden Quintin Hughes?” He chokes out.
Mark and Kielle noticed how you and Luke needed to have a serious conversation, so, with a quick pickup of Theo, they both headed to Kielle’s room, shutting the door for privacy.
“I’m sorry,” is all you can say as you try to hold back a sob.
Luke shakes his head, placing Rowden down and opening his arms out for you to lean in.
“Hey hey, none of that okay?” Luke rubs the side of your arm, letting you know he’s there. “You don’t have to apologize to me for anything. I’m the one that should be saying sorry. I was a jerk, ghosting you when I got to Michigan.”
“Yeah,” you say, looking up at him. “You really were.”
“The truth was—I was scared I’d fall inlove with you all over again if I had stayed in contact.” Luke shakily sighs, “I couldn’t stand the thought of not being able to be with you. I was an idiot, for breaking up with you, for everything I’ve done in the past.”
“You were a big idiot,” you say, laughing slightly.
“A very big big idiot,”
Rowden gurgles loudly, holding his tiny hands up in the air, waiting for you to pick him up.
You put your hand in the back of Rowden’s hand to support him as you placed him against your chest. “Hi Rowdy baby, it’s your dad.”
That’s all it took for Luke Hughes to let out a sob of his own, overwhelmed by the confirmation from you.
“Hi buddy,” he says softly, taking Rowden out of your hold. “I’m so sorry your daddy wasn’t here when you were born and for the first year of your life. I’m so so sorry,”
He places kisses against Rowden’s cheeks, eyes closing to cherish the moment with his son.
“So, who was the girl if you don’t mind me asking?”
Luke raises his eyebrows, now full attention on you. “The girl on my Instagram?” He questions.
You only nod.
“She.. she was a friend at one of the sororities. I met her months ago at some frat party. She was really nice, and asked me out.”
Your swore your heart nearly sunk into its chest. “That’s.. great Luke. What did you say?”
“Of course I said no,” he says, placing Rowden down carefully.
“Why?”
“Because I told her I was too inlove with somebody else.”
That’s all you needed to hear before smashing your lips against Luke’s, both of your bodies latched onto each other as it craved each other’s presence.
“I love you too Luke.”
“I know that,” Luke places another kiss to your lips. “And I’ll forever spend the rest of my days making it up to you and Rowden.”
It’s not until two hours later that Mark and Kielle walk out that they see you and Luke curled up next to each other, fast asleep with his arms securely around your shoulder and Rowden by your side.
They silently smile at one another, knowing their plan had finally worked after all.
ynuser
liked by lhughes_06, markestapa, kiellestapa and 770 others
ynuser my two babies!
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lhughes_06 baby rowden 💙
→ jackhughes wait what? ROWDEN?
→ quinnhughes i wasnt aware of this?? luke??
markestapa baby rowdy! so happy i don’t have to keep you a secret anymore
→ jackhughes YOU KNEW 🙄🙄
kiellestapa theo’s best friend!!
#slytherin!luke (ghostfacd version)#luke hughes x y/n#luke Hughes#luke hughes blurb#luke hughes imagines#luke hughes x reader#luke hughes x you#luke hughes fic#luke hughes fluff#nhl imagine#nhl x reader#nhl x you#nhl x y/n#umich hockey#umich x reader#umich smut#umich imagine#umich blurbs
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hi! I was wondering if u know what exactly is normal to not remember in childhood? like did can cause memory gaps/amnesia in childhood but I hear people also say it is normal to have gaps. so I don’t really know what is the normal and what is the amnesia?
Yes, most people have at least some memory gaps in their childhood. It's not unusual. However, usually those memory gaps are mostly only present for ages 5 and under. Different sources will say anywhere from "3-4" to "3-8." Generally, personally, I feel like it's more normal for people to not remember things under the age of 5. Anything over that age is like yeah you'll probably forget some things, but the average person won't have a ton of gaps in the way people with DID/OSDD will.
It's also normal to have memory gaps around traumatic events specifically, but people with DID/OSDD will have many more gaps and will have gaps for things that aren't traumatic (I have memory loss for video games I played, the things I liked, my hobbies, the feelings I felt over those things, etc.)
I can't really say for sure what's "normal" versus "abnormal", but I can give some personal experiences.
I always felt like my memories were like a giant puzzle with broken, missing pieces and mismatched pieces. Or like burnt photographs. Or like shattered fragments broken down into the tiniest pieces. Etc. etc.
I have many, many memories that feel like they are missing context, don't make sense, are "unfinished." Like a half of a memory, or vague memories. Or memories that I "know" happened, but can't really remember. Or feeling like there are many, many "holes" in my memories.
I have evidence of things I did, said, felt, etc. as a child, but I do not remember ever saying, doing, thinking, feeling those things. For example: I have evidence of me roleplaying as a kid. I distinctly remember telling people around those SAME ages that I didn't like roleplaying, never roleplayed, and found it boring/uninteresting/didn't like it. Even though just like a year or so prior, I apparently really liked roleplaying and did so frequently with a close friend of mine at the time? (Looking back, that ""roleplaying"" was definitely very likely just alters fronting and we thought it was just roleplaying lmfao but like I said I have no memories of roleplaying, ever).
I have amnesia for my teenage years and adult years. To my knowledge, amnesia for teenage years and adult years isn't common/normal for the average person. Unless you're, like. Super old I guess, but I've met way older people who remember a lot from their teenage years still
My family would directly ask me if I remembered something from my childhood and I would tell them I have no memory of it, while my brother (who is only a year older than me) did or something
In general my family will tell me about things that happened in my childhood and I wouldn't remember it
I have to rely on outside, objective things to be able to remember things like "I lived in this house around ages (xyz) because (abc)-". That probably makes no sense, so for example: I remember playing Spyro: A New Beginning around maybe ages 6-7? And upon Googling the release date of that game, it was released when I would've been 5, so I may have been around ages 5-6 when I played that game. Or, another example, "I don't remember what age I was when I played Poptropica, but that game came out in 2007, so I must have been anywhere from 6-8-years-old, likely 7 because I remember playing that game when Ilived in this house and I lived in that house at-" you get the picture. I hope that makes sense? Like I have to rely on objective stuff like "when did this game release, that will tell me how old I might've been when I played it" or something.
Memories feel "out of order." I can't put my memories in order. Like they're all jumbled and all over the place and I have to figure out the timeline myself, I have to figure out the timeline but the timeline keeps changing because I remember so little and have so many missing memories and out-of-context fragments and such and. It's all confusing.
Talk to other people about their childhoods, people who you know do not have DID or OSDD. It might become a bit more obvious to you how little you remember when you start to talk to other people about what they remember about their childhoods. At least for me, when hear people talk about their childhoods, I'm so shocked by how much more they remember than I do.
I grew up changing homes and schools a lot so this might not apply but I basically remember Nothing about most of my elementary schools beyond maybe the name and a few vague memories, etc. and I have many memories from schools that I cannot place WHAT school these memories are from, what age, etc.
Many memories that I can't remember the age, where I was, what was going on, etc. in general. This kinda goes back to "out-of-context memories, memories that don't make sense, etc."
Just a hunch. I always felt like I remembered so little about my childhood, barely remembered things, etc. and I always felt like I had a lot of ""repressed memories""/that it wouldn't surprise me if I did
These are my own personal experiences and since I didn't link any sources here to back these up and I myself don't actually have a lot of understanding of what amnesia for childhood is normal versus what's abnormal/etc., I'd take this post less as scientific fact and more personal experiences.
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HI I EXIST AND YOU DO TOO!
So here’s why I think I’m amazing and you should too
~Like however many things about me as I can think~
•I’ve been listening to redacted audio since February and I’m caught up on everything(ish)
•I’m a musical theatre person and I’ve been in 23 shows I’ve been doing this since I was 6
•I am a homosexual (pansexual [I think?])
•my slogan is “be gay, do drugs, hail satan”/hj it’s a really good song tho!!
•Fatherless😎
•I listen to a lot of TV girl and girl in red
•I say gender is above me when I cry about it at 3:00am
•Constant one or two aesthetics? Who’s she?
•I came here for Redacted Audio content was was not disappointed!!
•As of right now I'm in Godspell as the Turn Back O Man girl, Sonia!
•I have a collection of squishmellows and also little crystal Mushrooms
•my life goal is to move to NYC and become a broadway actor
•Taylor Swift hater and proud of it(I don’t like her music and find her annoying but at least he doesn’t have a shit ton of autotune)
•I have a Spotify where I made playlists for redacted audio characters(almost all of them, I still edit them all the the time) and other playlists! acc name: ASH! ^_−☆
~What I know/like~
•Redacted Audio
•Hazbin Hotel/Helluva boss
•WILL WOOD
•RTC, Heathers(both the movie and musical), Hamilton, Les Miserables, Mean Girls(both the movie and musical), etc.
•Lana Del Rey,Mitski,TV girl, etc.
•Steven Universe
•Stars
•Music in general(if you find my Spotify, PLEASE hmu with songs that u think I might like)
~My kinlist(Redacted and hazbin/helluva characters)~
•Freelancer(I’m still in school and I’m a trauma sponge too, also similar personalities, too much to name)
•Damien(overachiever, “gifted child”, mommy and daddy issues, gay)
•Angel/Guy(absolute chaos gremiln and certified vine quoter)
•Bright Eyes(ik their gone but I kin them so much it’s painful!! I take the blame for too much shit and I’m a scapegoat(kinda) and I’m rlly reckless)
•Tank/Darlin’(got into some bad situations because of people I’ve been around, impulsive, don’t ask for help enough)
•Angel Dust(preformer, jokes to cover truth, ✨trauma✨)
•Fizzarolli(preformance anxieties, always having to be at my best, "i have to be fine")
~things that I’ll dump on here~
•headcannons(probably a lot of headcannons lol)
•shitposts(random pictures that I found on Pinterest and gave context to)
•Those blank chart thingys(filled in with characters)
•fanfics(rarely,if I have the motivation)
•brain dumps/word vomits after an angst/lore/reverse comfort videos(panic hours)
All will be redacted audio content unless I’m feeling a bit different and yeah!
Thank you for reading and being here!
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Contingency Contract is upon us!
It's designed to be fully modular, so just pick which risks you feel comfortable with and have a go.
Don't get discouraged by how overwhelming it can be at first.
It can be quite fun to make the perfect match between the risks you pick and the operators you go with.
aaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAA
babey's first CC clear...
It took me a few tries to clear without any risks, albeit with the "no guards or supporters" thing already in mind. Once I finally cleared it, realized I could add on three risks ($$$ guards and supporters, max squad size 10, 1 base health) without changing up my strategy at all.
Later I did a similar run with the class toggle flipped (aka the Gubbles Learn Not to Over-Rely on Manticore Challenge™). This was woefully scuffed. The first attempt was ended prematurely when the battery in my mouse died partway through, and the second had a number of egregious tactical errors. I know how to better pull it off, but I somehow managed to clear it on try 2 so fuck it I'll take it
I was also able to pull off one of the early challenge missions (smth like "ur attack suck" and "edgy slicey boi have more hp" combo). From that I finally learned how powerful the combined slow from Manticore + Suzu really is, it's like. TURBO SLOW. er, um. extra slow. jumbo slow. molasses. paint dry. whatever u get the picture
For all of em I had to borrow a friend's Kyato, and ngl I still kinda feel like I cheated? But when presented with the choice of dual-bladed delete cannon or literally not being able to clear the base stage at all... I suppose I'll take the victory supported by friends >w>`
This is the highest amount of contingency bucks I will ever possess, and of course with such a limited sum of funds and an exclusive pool of things with which to purchase with such funds, it's paramount I take the time to really consider all of my options, carefully make an informed and calculated decision on what would best be wor--
or I could immediately just manticore outfit.
It's okay she's worth it
So @lilyblackdrawside, I know you sent this ask much earlier on in the event, and I intended to attempt it earlier, but for a while I just... didn't feel much up for it? Hard content is hard, babey player is babey, and life always finds a way to intervene. Lack of interest, hyperfocus on N64 development, hyperfocus on beating Perfect Dark for the first time, chronic illness, mental illness, going outside for walks on the precious two (2) days it didn't feel like instant heatdeath outside. Y'know, the usual. But given that this is the last CC-- and also the first CC I was even able to participate in-- I gotta say, I wish I got to it sooner.
Generally speaking, challenging content usually ain't my thing unless I'm really interested in taking it on. And in the context of arknights, I've been burned out enough by the difficulty curve of the events and complexity of managing a ton of ops to really seek any of it out. But while even the risk 3 CC was difficult... I had fun! Eliminating certain classes got me to better think of how to get the most of what ops I had available. A stronger boss and squishier ops got me to think more critically about how to keep my ops alive through the onslaught, and to discover a pretty powerful combination of slows to crank the most out of what DPS I could manage. I bet I could've managed to squeeze in a risk 4, even, if I hadn't taken it all on in the last two days of the very last CC.
Not recognizing an appreciation or enjoyment of something until it's just about gone... kind of an ongoing theme with my life lately, eh? It was my first real CC, but I'm gonna miss it.
Oh also the music. The music straight up kicks ass.
Also someone borrowed my Vulcan a bunch fsr?? I know who took out Manticore that one time, but as for Vulcan's eight excursions up to risk fucking ten, I've no clue who brought her along for that ride. First time Anyone has used my support units, really, so I'm glad they could be useful!!
anyway everyone look at my (virtual) (anime) (adopted) daughter, she's so cool and confident and she's grown so much and im lov her
#w e w that took an hour to type#but i enjoy reflecting on these sorta things#arknights#contingency contract#gub
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after the aoc art i was gonna send this but obv. the whole thing happened. anyways in what ways do u think aoc link and zelda have a different dynamic than in botw because it definitely felt different from what i could tell after the little i’ve played
hmm. you're 100% right about this and i think it comes down to the differences in circumstance between the two games. Because link and zelda are so lacking in communication for a lot of their relationship in both games, how they think about and interact with each other really comes down to what they know about each other from outside sources.
in AOC we have a link who is already an established member of the royal guard long before the master sword was even found. He is well-known among his peers as basically a fucking powerhouse on the battlefield. (the opening fight of the game establishes this--link gets a TON of praise and open recognition from multiple higher-ups for defeating moblins.) He's assigned to be zelda's knight specifically because he's proven himself in battle, NOT because of anything to do with the master sword. He is (almost) a stranger to zelda when he's assigned to protect her, but he's also not immediately representative of her own failure.
in botw's timeline, on the other hand, it's heavily implied that Link is only assigned to be zelda's knight AFTER having claimed the sword. (specifically in her diary she expresses disdain for him that doesn't really make sense unless she's already begun to view him as succeeding where she has failed, i.e. he already has the sword.) This means that zelda almost NEVER has the chance to see him as anything except the hero of hyrule. She is introduced to him as The Soldier Who Claimed The Master Sword, and by his own design she never sees anything else, which is why there's SO MUCH that she has to work through in regards to him.
AOC lets link and zelda sort of.. exist outside of the context of the lore for a few brief moments. Link is still her knight, he still has a duty to protect her, and he's STILL SILENT, but there's no longer this intense, crushing pressure that taints every single interaction. they're allowed to interact... not quite as people, per se, because they're still bound by the conventions of their social classes and zelda is still under the pressure of her destiny even when link isn't, but as... more than pawns in a long game, at the very least. in botw it's painfully obvious in many of their early interactions that they're being puppeted around for the sake of appearances, but in aoc there's juuuuust enough freedom pre-sword-claim to allow them to connect a little more.
by the time link claims the master sword, he and zelda have already established quite a bit of trust, to the point that it's not link reaching for the sword that makes it glow, it's him reaching for HER. That buildup of trust is what AOC zelink has early-on that botw lacks. botw zelink DOES get there, but it takes MUCH longer because they have to work past their mental blocks BEFORE bonding. AOC establishes the trust, and then adds the magical-destiny mental blocks back in to BREAK the trust. And zelda DOES still struggle with viewing link as representative of her failures, and link DOES still struggle under all that pressure, but the fact that they already know each other makes those struggles much much easier to resolve.
I didn't like a lot of the actual plot of aoc, but what they did well, they did WELL. the scenes that cement link and zelda's trust in one another, in particular, are INSANELY well-done, especially when compared to events as we know them in botw. for link, it's the choice to flee the castle with zelda instead of fighting to the death with the king. HE CHOOSES HER OVER HIS DUTY. we know this is NOT how it happened in botw. he had to flee, half-dead, from the castle after trying and FAILING to fight. In AOC, because he and zelda have had so much more time to establish that bond in each other, he listens when he is told to protect her. he chooses his duty to HER over his duty to the kingdom.
Zelda's power-activation scene falls into this exact same category. In botw, we know how this happens: Link, after working himself nearly to death trying desperately to fulfil his duty, collapses trying to defend zelda. Zelda, terrified that he will die if she doesn't intervene, subconsciously activates her powers in order to save him, but she is too late and he is already too near death to be saved without the shrine of resurrection. in AOC, on the other hand, we have almost the exact same scene, with several key differences. Link enters into this battle without many wounds to speak of. he is in relatively good shape, having chosen to flee the castle with zelda instead of staying to fight a losing battle. when he realizes he's going to be overwhelmed in battle, he ATTEMPTS to self-sacrifice in the same way we see him do in pre-calamity botw. he tells zelda to run, and stays to fight the monsters with seemingly little thought to what might happen to him. but zelda, fearing for his life, DISOBEYS HIS ORDERS and runs back to help him, activating her powers in the process. two things of note here: 1. zelda knows that link is an incredibly skilled fighter and that he was not injured when this fight began. Had she been a tiny bit less cognizant of link's personality and mental state, she could have easily seen him telling her to run as a simple "I'll finish these monsters off and catch up to you later." but because she KNOWS him, she immediately recognizes the attempt at self-sacrifice for what it is. and 2. she EXPLICITLY DISOBEYS HIM. zelda in both botw and aoc is a character who has a really complex relationship with herself and her own autonomy. her life is governed by prophecies and by the word of her father, and she constantly finds herself trapped and UNABLE to disobey. ive talked before about the botw power-activation scene and about how i think her powers activating was specifically due to her reclaiming the power that had been taken from her, which is EXACTLY WHAT WE SEE HERE, but the twist being that rather than defying her destiny or her father or whatever she is defying LINK and his attempt to self-sacrifice. it's a more thorough rejection of their destiny than even botw imo because she rejects both her lack of agency AND link's martyrdom, which she wasn't quite able to do in botw. AOC link is allowed to live and continue fighting because of that rejection specifically, where he wasn't able to in botw.
ALL OF THESE CHANGES, all the key differences in the way link and zelda interact with each other and the way the story progresses because of their interactions, ultimately trace back to the fact that they were given a very breif amount of time in which their relationship was nearly unaffected by the calamity. they were allowed to be princess and knight with no other strings attached, so even when things went batshit they still had that concrete foundation to fall back on. THAT'S the difference between aoc and botw zelink imo. thank you for coming to my ted talk
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these weeks just...just keep comin, huh??? like they don't stop or something ;P
another quick update from queenie hq: things are going to c o n t i n u e to be sporadic and strange on my end for the next couple weeks. i'm going to be hosting family, again, until roughly the end of the month, so alas, i'm not anticipating a ton of writing time. or relaxing time. or time where i'm not gritting my jaw and screaming internally. SUCH IS LIFE!
however, i'm totally psyched to report i fiiinally got to cross one long-running wip off my list (the tale(s) of the champion), and oooh the feeling of seeing a complete checkmark for that baby over on ao3 is fueling the fire for me to wrap some others up too ;P my plan for the time being is still to try and get out a chapter or two of like wringing blood in the near future, but i'm also going to be working on finally wrapping of mummy men & bathtub soup so i can open the door for other CREEPs projects. we shall see.
as always, i've thrown some snippets under the cut - strictly supermassive projects this time, hehe - and i hope you're all doing well <3
of mummy men & bathtub soup
“Uh huh. Look. I’m sure you guys have something hilarious planned for me tonight. Another A+ jumpscare courtesy of Washington Pictures, Inc. And I’m also sure that the more of this crap you get me to gobble up, the antsier all your cloak and daggers bullshit makes me, the funnier it’ll be when I fall into a swoon or whatever, but it’s not happening. Am I the brightest bulb in the lamp? No! I’m not! Am I the sort of moron who gets bit by a dog and tries to pet it a second time? Also no!”
Sam had barely started shaking her head when Fliss joined them, an unspoken question in her eyes. She latched onto her instead. “People keep talking about last night. I've heard someone mention weird stuff happening on at least three separate occasions already, so if anyone could give me just a little context, that would be so great.”
“Weird is…one way to put it,” Fliss said. “It’s not the word I would’ve picked. Freakish, maybe. Terrifying, definitely. It must’ve taken you guys forever to set that up! It was—”
“Oh no,” she breathed, dropping her head into her hands. Conrad almost expected her to sink into a nearby chair or go full-on crisscross-applesauce on the floor, so intense was her reaction. She didn’t: If anything, she set her shoulders and squared herself off, assuming the air of a battle-hardened soldier. “Okay. Okay. Okay. Listen to me. I know you think this is about you because you think everything’s about you, but I am telling you, it's not."
upcoming CREEPs project with a title that 100% spoils ALL the surprise of it and thus will not yet be included asdlkfjalskjfklsjdf
“Any word from our housetergeist?”
“Uh, not unless they suddenly share yours and Josh’s love of absolutely inscrutable inside jokes,” Ashley called back, equal measures relieved and disappointed to see the fridge decorated with the same message the guys had put up before their trip: DO THE BARTMAN. Rolling her eyes, she pulled the door open and rummaged around, making a happy little sound when she spotted what she’d wanted. “Hey,” she called again, “are you gonna be upset with me if I drink the last cream soda?”
“Josh might be!”
“I wasn’t asking about Josh, you dip! I was asking about you!”
“Oh. Then, yeah, heartbroken. I-I-I don’t know how I’ll survive! I might have to reassess this whole relationship thing. Honestly, I can’t believe you’d do something as heinous as drink the last cream soda! I thought I meant something to you!”
She grabbed the can and shut the door, groaning, “Ha ha,” before stopping cold.
The fridge magnets had moved.
a fic that started as a joke post but now has almost 40k words written for it
“Hey,” he said, giving the grate a hard shake. They all winced, pulling even farther away until they pretty much fell on top of each other. “Chill. They’re fuckin’ dead. Shit’s fine. Don’t be weird about it.”
Good deed done, he turned back around to rejoin the guys, and—fuck.
Right away, Bobby knew he didn’t like the way Chris was sizing them up. He didn’t know why he didn’t like it, he just knew it spelled trouble, one way or another.
Jack seemed to agree with him. “No,” he said long before Chris even opened his mouth. “Whatever it is you’re brewing in that snowglobe you call a skull, quit while you’re ahead. Or while you still have a head.”
“Your plan didn’t work.” For someone who usually stayed at base during their hunts on account of ‘not wanting to die the world’s stupidest death,’ Chris sure was sticking his finger awfully close to Jack’s face. That was biting range. And Jack could move quick when he wanted to. “Your plan worked even less,” he continued, moving that finger to Travis’s face instead, and Jesus Christ, that was worse!
Travis didn’t answer him. Not at first. He sucked his teeth, though. Stared at Chris’s finger. Probably thought about breaking it off if he didn’t get it out of his face. “If you don’t get that outta my face, I will break it off, so help me God.”
Yeah. Checked out.
#queenie writes supermassive#ya gurl is already exhausted and the fam hasn't even gotten here yet x_x#the past two weeks have been. so much funeral planning and let me tell you. i am not. looking forward. to the day itself lmfao#it's been. such a time over here y'all.#let me go back to sitting at the kids table i fucking hate being one of the grownups in charge of shit lmaoooooooooooooo
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Titus Mede of Kvatch - A fun link between a scrapped Oblivion quest and the Fourth Era
Originally posted on r/teslore.
In an interview after Oblivion, Todd Howard made this comment:
In regards to the politics comment, that's a valid statement, in that Daggerfall and Morrowind both have main stories dealing with a lot of politics, and that wasn't the story we wanted to do this time. There was a time that the Oblivion main quest featured a ton of that, dealing with the Elder Council, but we did end up cutting it while it was still on paper, in all our story reads, it really defocused the main quest from dealing with the daedra, which we wanted the focus to be. Anyway, I think the lack of actually seeing and dealing with the Elder Council is certainly one of my "I wish it had this" things, as we wrote some great stuff for it that just didn't make it in. It was the "nobility" faction line, where you made your way up and became "The Duke of Colovia" and sat on the Elder Council. The only remnant of that questline is the dead Duke in Castle Kvatch, which was to be the beginning of that line.
The dead duke is Ormellius Goldwine and you are asked to retrieve his signet ring, called the Colovian Signet Ring, from his body. He never gets a successor, Kvatch is never rebuilt (unless you download a mod.) It doesn't feel that weird in context. Oblivion in general has all sorts of interesting political problems lurking in the corners of the various courts that never get any quests. (The count of Bravil has hired a Dunmer Inquisitor to go after Khajiit rebels, for instance, and it just comes up in one conversation with the Inquisitor who does nothing in game.)
The player presumably would end up wearing the Colovian Signet ring and becoming Count of Kvatch in the scrapped plot Todd Howard described.
The Pocket Guide to the Empire, Third Edition, released with Oblivion, and written by Ted Peterson establishes that the Count had no obvious heirs. Though, mysteriously, it has a different name for the Count, because continuity even in the same game is not a TES strength.
Family strife in Kvatch claimed the lives of both sons of Count Haderus Goldwine, vying for the inheritance. While peace has been restored, the Count, at the time of this writing, is still in mourning, and has not designated a new heir.
With no heir designated, the Count died at the hands of Daedra, leaving the leadership of Kvatch ripe for the taking. And since it wasn't the Hero of Kvatch who'd complete this scrapped quest, Titus Mede I did.
Or at least I assume. It's never said outright in the books or games that Mede hails from Kvatch and took it over first, but it's hinted at. Let me lay out the bread crumbs of this trail.
Titus Mede began his life as an Imperial officer in Michael Kirkbride and Kurt Kuhlmann's Star Wars fanfic! (I also know that fanfic got a TES rework, though I haven't read either version in whole.) Titus Mede shows up as the new Emperor of Cyrodiil in the official novels by Greg Keyes: The Infernal City and Lord of Souls. Not a surprising transition, since we know Keyes was working off notes given him by the developers, and /u/mkirkbride has previously confirmed that some of the Fourth Era history in the novels originates with his ideas.
We don't get a full sketch of his biography. Here's what we know.
Titus Mede had been—and was—many things. A soldier in an outlaw army, a warlord in Colovia, a king in Cyrodiil, and Emperor.
Lathenil in "Rising Threat" will confirm this in Skyrim, and add an interesting little detail about the nature of Titus Mede's claim.
After seven long, bloody years the Stormcrown Interregnum was ended when a Colovian warlord by the name of Titus Mede seized the crown. Whether he had rightful claim or not is moot. Without Titus Mede, there would not be an Empire today. He proved a shrewd and capable leader, such that Skyrim endorsed him as Emperor.
"Whether he had rightful claim or not is moot" suggests that at least for propaganda's sake, Titus Mede made a claim of legitimacy. He deserved to be Emperor not only because he won the Civil War with Thules the Gibbering.
We also know that he started his career without any rank. His son Attrebus says
Listen-my father was once just a soldier with ambition. Now he’s Emperor. He fought for everything he ever got, and I was born with it. Who should be admired the most?”
So what was his claim? One more detail from the novels suggests the answer.
“You know what that is?” she asked, indicating a small black tattoo of a wolf’s head.
He did, of course. It was the Emperor’s personal brand, worn only by his innermost circle.
The Wolf's Head was the symbol of the Count of Kvatch.
Put this all together, and I think we can conclude that young Titus Mede the soldier first made a bid to take over ruined County Kvatch, on his way to greater things. He probably got hold of that ring to make his claim, since there was no obvious Goldwine heir. It wouldn't matter if people believed he was rightfully the heir to the Count of Kvatch if he made people recognize him. And the same would go for Cyrodiil and the Empire. Many of the Elder Council would privately turn their nose up at him as an upstart. His Nibenese Minister Hierem plots to overthrow him. But he outlasted them all and the Oblivion political plot got a triumphant ending, despite Todd Howard's decision to junk it.
I'm not, of course, the first person to put these pieces together. While researching this, I found that very active fan Pilaf the Defiler wrote a piece that makes the Kvatch connection. The full piece with Lady Nerevar's art is on her tumblr. The relevant paragraph:
The warlord Titus Mede has declared himself King of Colovia and musters an entirely illegal army in the hills of County Kvatch. This misguided bandit king does not agree with the wisdom of the Elder Council in placing his terrible majesty Emperor Thules of Nibenay on the throne. Sadly, the Elder Council has had to place severe restrictions on travel along the Gold Road for the duration of this so-called uprising. If you come across a checkpoint, don’t attempt to flee or go around it. This is for your own safety, citizen. By complying to the law and showing our good faith, we can discourage outlaws like Mede from operating within our borders with impunity. With the support of good citizens like yourself, the Elder Council and Emperor Thules can continue to lead us through this transitional phase in our glorious Empire. Respect the law, for Julianos and the Nine!
I'd love to see more fanworks fleshing out the Medes' origin in County Kvatch.
Added comments: I learned in the teslore discussion that there is an Oblivion mod: Knightly Orders for Cities that adds in Titus Mede as the head of the Order of the Wolf in Kvatch.
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Akamaru's Guide To Being Your Very Own Clip Queen On Twitch
I've been making a ton of clips on twitch in the last year or so and I have learned a lot so it's time to share what I've learned!
1: The total length of time grabbed when you hit the clip button is 90 seconds. Keep in mind the end of the clippable time is actually a couple seconds AFTER you hit the clip button, whether live or in VOD.
2: Clips max out at 60 seconds, and have a minimum of 5 seconds. Sometimes if you try to publish a 60 second clip it'll give an error, so just trim a fraction of a second off the beginning or end.
3: If the clip page video freezes, or doesn't show the timeline properly, refresh the page instead of closing and hitting the clip button again. This saves the 90 seconds you were working with, and hitting the clip button will make a brand new clip while the old one is saved as a default. That said, sometimes it will break and not even be saved with default settings, so just be weary.
4: Moving the play head for the start of a clip will restart the clip video, but moving the ending will not. However, if the clip is playing, moving the end to where the current time is will end the clip and loop it as normal even while still holding the play head.
5: If clipping live, be fast or else you'll lose the moment. Once 90 seconds pass it's gone. However, if a bit is going long, try to hold out as long as you think you can to catch as much of it as you want, assuming it fits within a 60 second time frame.
6: Also for clipping live, you don't have to edit the clip immediately. The tab will keep it available for some time before it saves the default settings and trying to save edits won't work. This allows you to wait for a quiet moment to quickly edit the clip if you don't want to look away from the stream too much. Unfortunately, I don't know what that time limit is
7: When live, if you're editing while still listening/watching the stream, i recommend lightly turning down the volume of one or the other so you can distinguish what is live and what is clip.
8: When clipping from a VOD, you can always pause before hitting the clip button, or even go backwards so you know exactly what you want in the clip.
9: Titles can be whatever you want, though keep in mind Twitch has a filter for a lot of swear words and other "vulgar" words. This can be easily bypassed with * or a space or a - or a number.
10: I always try and make titles of clips funny and accurate. This can be a direct repeat of some of what's being said, or as if responding to the situation, or anything really. Titles can also be changed later on by going to your personal Creator Dashboard > Content > Clips > Clip's I've Created. The url is https://dashboard.twitch.tv/u/[YourUsername]/content/clips. Here you can also see every clip you've made, the channel, category, when it was made, and view count. You can delete and share them from this page too.
11: When making a clip, try and allow a brief bit of quiet at the beginning and end. This ensures it won't start or end jarringly. Unless you're going for something jarring, but that's up to personal taste and context.
12: If you think it's funny, if you want it clipped, CLIP IT. Don't worry too much about what you think other people will enjoy. Just have fun with it.
13: Keep in mind a streamers rules and preferences in regards to clips. Some embrace out of context quotes, and others will find them less favorable, so keep this mind. Streamers and their editors can delete clips made in their channel as they please, but not rename them.
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okay so my best advice for anon from someone with almost 2 years of mcyt fandom bullshittery under their belt is to 1. completely ignore the dsmp lore. unless u have no other life stuff going on you will never be up to date with that. i failed to become up to date even 2 years ago, it's THAT much. so forget lore. But. 2. if u wanna get into shipping you can watch compilations on youtube. if that feels like it's missing context u can watch the vods they come from. watch George's cooking streams. look up irl streams with sapnap and karl. watch the snf meetup streams!! the qnf meetup streams too. look up "memes with dreams" and watch those too for dnf content or look up the jackbox streams. look up dream's discord podcasts-there are people who cut out the silences and they're awesome. watch the 2 "are you in love with your best friend" quiz videos. obviously watch the videos on their individual youtube channels. i think there's a dnfcliparchive tumblr account or something too but if that's not their url it's something along those lines. there used to be a doc explaining dream's controversies but that got deleted after his last one lol. at the end of the day, know that even people who have been here a while don't know EVERYTHING and if you see something that looks like an inside joke your best bet is just asking someone, you probably won't find the source on your own. it took me MONTHS to stop feeling confused about all the stuff that was going on all the time (it's a bit more chill now), but it's a fun fandom with tons of content to back-watch/read so you'll never really be bored. also!! if you want fic recs i will be happy to provide lol. maybe read heatwaves&helium cause those are the most popular fics and they're like... part of the dnf starter pack atp. and also have fun!! (also p.s. my favourite vods are the dream geoguessr ones feat george and sapnap& George's pokemon streams. also Sapnap's pokemon card pack opening streams and one of them is feat. george, bad, maybe dream?? so yeah. also i cannot state this enough THE SNF MEETUP STREAMS. trust me. u will die. anyway bye)
This is such a good primer (like the old school livejournal kinds) omg yes.
I actually saw a reupload of that controversies doc on reddit somewhere when I was first poking around and it was extremely useful because it made me realize a lot of the stuff I'd just internalized about him through social media osmosis were really and completely bullshit. I mean, he's sure as fuck not perfect, but he's not what I thought he was just from reading hashtags and headlines.
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HAI !!!!!! HERE TO ASK ABOUT D00MBUG
👁️ 🤥 💥 😨 🌋 🙈🙉🙊
JESUS babe thatz a lotta emojiz /pos
thiz iz gonna be the au vers of them since u Did specify that in dmz
👁️ EYE - what colour are their eyes? do people notice their eyes? is there anything special about them (shows emotion easily, literally magical…)?
hmmmm. i dont think they actually have eyez tbh. itz just empty black with two little white lightz! ppl dont usually notice the fact therez nothing there unless they get close to em, they just see them az oddly colored eyez. nothing really special!
🤥 LYING - are they good liars? do they have tells to show they’re lying?
oh absolutely. little shit liez all the time bcoz they think itz funny. i dont think theyd have any OBVIOUS tellz, but for ppl who know them well itd be fairly obvious- they love to play up liez and stuff and be more .. idk smug? like theyre smug NORMALLY sure but they play it up a ton when lying to be a smirky and shit lol
💥 COLLISON - what emotions do they have trouble dealing with?
all of them. you think thiz guy knowz how to tell apart emotionz? absolutely the fuck not!! who do you take them for. id say the onez they struggle w the most are frustration, anger, and fear. they just dont know how to deal w them or express thoze onez very well.
😨 FEARFUL - when scared, do they go into “flight” or “fight”?
actually, they go into "freeze" ! theyll just completely and literally lock up. if whateverz scaring them doeznt go away or lessen, then they CAN get pushed into "fight", where theyll be overly aggressive and assertive to try and get outta the situation.
🌋 VOLCANO - how bad is their temper? is it a slow boil, or a instant explosion?
hmmmm. instant explosion id say. they cant really tolerate much that pissez them off. annoyance iz a buildup, but genuine anger iz instantaneous.
🙈 SEE-NO-EVIL - whats a side of your oc that they don’t want to show other people?
the fact theyre a somewhat murderous robot lol. end of story. they dont LIKE killing people - itz not their preferred method of dealing w shit, thatz mostly just fucking w them in other wayz - but they HAVE done it, and CAN and WILL do it again. but for the ppl they like, theyd rather thoze people Not know about that.
🙊 SPEAK-NO-EVIL - what is something your oc will refuse to stay quiet about?
mmmmm. theyre very chatty in general, so itz hard to pinpoint something specific that they wouldnt shut up about. i genuinely cant think of anything for thiz one lol. maybe home?
🙉 HEAR-NO-EVIL - what is the worse thing your oc could hear from someone?
augh okay. nothing specific would hurt them - itd have to be contextual. like, even the worst insultz you could think of wouldnt have much of an effect on them.
but.. a simple "goodbye," said in the context of whoever saying it never coming back? leaving them behind, or just about to destroy them? that. thatd be the worst.
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Joe ignored me when I asked for a photo and there was only 2-3 people including myself who recognised him. The girl in front of me hugged him and then ignored me. He probably thought I was gonna hug him too I don’t think he’s into any affection at all I guess not from strangers at least?
What event was this? I’m sorry queen but this is the first story tonight that I’m not buying entirely and not because I don’t think Joe can’t be rude to fans (I actually have heard of him declining photographs and autographs a few times before, never at an event though - like people who go up to him randomly do sometimes get declined but also other times he does the selfie and signs like if you do see him and want one - not you anon - I’d still say try) but because I’m confused why there would only be 2-3 people who “recognized” him (if it’s an event everyone is usually recognizable unless it’s like a huge comic con thing and you get a bit actor from Star Trek: The Galactical Galaxical Cartoon Version in a booth who yes only hardcore fans would know but Joe doesn’t do Comic cons?). Was it maybe just not appropriate to take pics with the people (Joe did a book festival a few years back and I mean book festivals you don’t usually have tons of selfies at them so maybe he got weird about that?)?? The thing about “he doesn’t like physical affection” sounds exactly like the anti who said he gave none to Taylor lol - that’s the biggest reason I’m doubting you queen - and I’ve seen like a MILLION selfies with fans where he’s hugging them and like all of them actually say he gives great hugs and there are lots of pics of him hugging people in the industry that he wouldn’t know well so idk this is just not fully adding up for me.
I’m not calling you a liar because idk you and I do think he could be rude lol but the vibe of this ask is not fully tracking for me. You’re welcome to provide further context to clarify. Also it’s possible he just didn’t like the look of u lol (mostly a joke unless you are indeed lying).
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bergamot and (vee)tiver | Trial 3.2 | Re: Esmée, Bian, Harriet, Avery
Before the accusation bombs dropped, Vee had two things to clarify with the questions and queries asked before. "I didn't hear anythin' f-from the Post Office." They respond to Esmée's question. "I think the individual r-rooms are somewhat soundproof, and there was a r-room between us, but I can only c-confirm that I was undisturbed around and a-after 10.15 as Meili left."
And to the tail end of Bian's initial accusation, before things went so far off the end, they hold up their trusty battle parasol. "Definitely h-have Vendetta on me... Not that I'd use them on a-anyone here outside of a spar." She clarifies weakly.
Harriet's initial confession to being the third person in the secret room doesn't shock him as much as he thought it would; from a theoretical standpoint, it makes sense out of all the people it could've been, so when she clarifies she isn't the killer but an unfortunate witness who froze up on the spot, it also makes a ton of sense to him. The others offer their thoughts and reassurances towards Harriet, with Germain stepping in to ask that they not be hasty with the accusation, so they had expected another deep analysis of the evidence at hand...
Then came armageddon. Amidst the flurry of direct attacks against and defenses for Harriet's innocence, they wilted under the pressure and contact fear aimed in their general direction. "...Is it me or is she bein' u-unnaturally aggressive, even for a direct accusation?" They mumble quietly to themselves, lost among the cacophony of voices as they retreat further inwards into their chair. Only when the dust has settled do they find the spine to sit up straight, reflecting on the accusation that Theophania brought up and trying to make sense of what could be true at this point.
"If Harriet had intended to k-kill Frank with a broken lance, why w-would she leave the sharp half b-behind in the storage room? That would be severely counterintuitive and r-risky, especially knowin' that attackin' Frank w-would be on a timer's edge given his bond status with S-Shinjuku, not to mention the fact you would have to k-know that you were goin' to attack Frank at all... And if s-she had instead returned the rest of the l-lance to the room after breakin' it durin' the attack, w-why return to the fountain room or secret room at all a-after that? The route d-down to the hidden room isn't exactly c-conspicuous or immediate... And it would take you time to h-head downstairs even after the first two fell."
They press their knuckles against their head. "Granted, per what Shinjuku has said, b-both Bian and Harriet are aware of his particular bond with F-Frank, so neither should have a reason to risk a-attackin' him either... If we're runnin' on the motive b-bein' the catalyst for this murder, then B-Bian would be more suspicious since Harriet's w-was already revealed earlier today. But l-last I checked, unless I'm missin' context I d-don't have, Bian cares about Frank. Harriet cares a-about Meili too. Neither of these seem any more p-plausible than the last. And between me, L-Luz, and Theophania..."
Vee can only offer a helpless shrug. "Well, I don't want to imply anythin' a-about people's behaviour or their reasons for dislikin' s-someone enough to attempt murder. So I'll just... s-stick to the facts I can offer." Vee turns to Avery. "It's n-not likely a sprained ankle at least, the b-bruise seemed uniform in pressure across and lacked the s-swollenness I would associate with a sprainin' or rollin' an ankle. I w-would also like to offer more about the s-state of Meili's injuries when put into context of the f-fall. The stairway down to the secret room has about t-ten feet in elevation, so presumin' Meili and Frank fell t-the full distance from the fountain, as evidenced by the bloodstains o-on the stairs, based on the severity of Meili's own wounds, their death would have been anywhere between instantaneous to f-five minutes. They maintained consciousness l-long enough to heal Frank though, clearly, so let's say... A-Average of three minutes?"
They do the math. "That would p-put the time of impact around 10.20, give or take a f-few minutes. That's a tight window, b-but it would be more than e-enough for someone to return to the storage room to dispose of t-the lance if we believe that's the case, or even if it wasn't, for someone to either r-rush down into the hidden room or to the Smithy. Bian and Shin b-both testified to seein' each other around 10.23 when Meili p-passed away, but after they were already struck." They correct Nao, before pausing. "Though... that does m-mean the only other person who could vouch for w-where Bian was at 10.14 and before is also o-one of the people most interested in keepin' her alive."
Unlike their peers, they can't throw out a direct accusation, but it sure was food for thought.
"I'll still stand b-by Harriet though," That is the one thing they're sure of. "Regardless of whatever the t-truth must be, it's hard to fathom how or why she would risk so m-much for so little payoff and the death or a friend. T-Two friends, knowin' that if she got away with it, t-the eventuality that it will be one of us w-who dies regardless. We need to continue findin' w-ways to narrow things down f-further. If you wish to search m-me, please go ahead. Just be aware t-that I am paler as a result of the D-Dark Revival spell I used drainin' vitality. Don't think I'm i-injured otherwise..."
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anon: “hewoo !! umm can you make nct ideal type like age , apperance , height , cute or sexy etc 🌬️” let’s fuckin GOOOO. i’ll be using gender neutral terms for this! please tell me if i used she/her for any part as i’m more used to writing for fem readers!
sorry this took like almost a week i’ve been really busy lately, i apologise! under a cut because its so long lol
disclaimer: tons of “i feel”s and “i think”s; plus, this is just my headcanons of the boys! remember that all of you are beautiful and lovely and special in ur own way!! <3
TAEIL
i feel like taeil would want someone closer to his age (+/-), unless,,, UNLESS he finds someone he really clicks with (like haechan for eg) if they’re at a younger age
if he really does then taeil will 100% make the effort
ngl taeil would love a person taller than him, would worship the shit outta them
if he gets teased for being shorter he doesnt care LMAO this man will have his hand around your middle and eye the other person mockingly
would love when you own your appearance with confidence, he likes to be by your side to admire how comfortable you feel in your skin
see him being a more traditional man by dating a korean person, but if he’s attracted to someone not of his race, i can see him making the effort
appearance? maybe someone who cleans up well, in a sense who’s a bit proper in their hygiene and like hair or accessories ig. he doesn’t mind what you wear tho, personally leaning more towards the comfy styles of cardigans and baggy clothes.
JOHNNY
either wants someone younger or older… i’m leaning more towards a younger s/o though bc he naturally has a “taking care” kinda vibe, and it’s sweet to see since he naturally takes care of the younger members like mark and haechan
wants to SMOTHER his s/o so i also think he’d want someone shorter than him. the man is a fucking skyscraper lawd
generally likes to give love A LOT since he’s an only child and wants to share that affection with someone who aren’t his parents or the members
but, but, like taeil, i see him really liking being held by his s/o, not just in a small spoon but laying on your chest, lying in between your legs with his head on ur tummy… so cute
i feel like johnny wouldn’t care much for appearance, nor your race since he kinda has the freedom to engage in english conversation. likes a cutesy positive vibe that can share the positivity and happiness he radiates normally!!
TAEYONG
feel like he would go for someone a tad bit older than he is, bc he likes to be taken care of
looking over the members can become really tiring and he needs some sort of solace to relax in
honestly if you’re younger too, he wouldn’t mind, he just needs to be babied LOL
likes tall people… ngl…
would like someone more in tune with their emotion and just not afraid to speak their mind? he likes confidence tbh
can see him going for a foreign person if he’s really passionate about them, would learn english/your native language
taeyong likes a person that likes their outfits and doesn’t care what you wear out as long as you feel comfortable in it
would prefer more of a calm s/o, but easy-going and fun when they want to be
YUTA
doesnt really care for age tbh. if you’re able to bring him happiness and love him he doesn’t mind whether you’re older or younger
shorter 100%. wants to hold you very much, big spoon, the one holding you in the relationship
would go for a foreign person, but honestly, would want someone he can speak japanese with too. even he has shotaro now, he wants like just a closer person to confide in and also just share lil cute inside jokes with <3
yuta just wants his s/o to be themselves. just. yes. (i mean unless your personality is shit but he doesnt want someone to put on a front with him)
although he also likes cute people… he just wants to pamper u and make u feel like you’re the only one
KUN
goddamn, six kids plus three pets? this man is hanging on by a thread, but he would like a younger and shorter s/o
what’s one more right?
also naturally has the taking care vibes like johnny, but there’s just something so… dom… about him AHASHFHEHR
would lean more toward a chinese- or korean-speaking s/o but
doesn’t mind a foreign s/o IF they make the effort. he would if he knows you would too.
kun is lowkey energetic tbh and would want someone who can read the room of whether he’s comfy enough to let loose and remain the ‘parental’ figure
cute people i think will attract him, but oh my gosh when you’re self-assured? WHEW he really likes that, how you’re uncaring of people’s opinions regarding your appearance or personality
DOYOUNG
doesn’t mind older or younger or the same age, although i seem him gravitating toward an older s/o
this man is also 100% stressed. needs to be held, there’s a balance though in your relationship of who holds who though
would stay dating a korean/korean-speaking person i feel. not saying he wouldn’t make the effort but he takes his idol life very seriously and the outcomes if he were to get together with someone who doesnt speak his native tongue
he would want someone proper, like taeil, and would prefer his s/o to be cute and stuff
doyoung needs to know what you want though, so you’ll need to be sure of your choices basically
would like it more if his s/o was calm and just collected bc like taeyong, he needs a haven to relax in when he’s done for the day or when he needs to recharge
TEN
same age or older s/o !!! wants to be taken care of, this man also has a lot of love to give, altho they’re towards selective people like his members, pets, you
would gravitate towards tall people i feel
you need to love leon and louis. period. bella is a hot second.
ten would want an s/o who supports him wholeheartedly, seeing as he has so many talents that sometimes he gets caught up in showing talent for his idol life as opposed to creating things for himself. it’s easy to get lost in the pressure of the media to put out content that he feels is half- assed.
ten knows of his worth, but sometimes he just needs a bit of confirmation and support from the right people to truly create and post what he wants to
he would date a partner who doesn’t speak korean/chinese. he has english and thai and basic japanese baby!!! but yea, he def wouldn’t mind a foreign partner AND would go search up on resources to learn your native tongue!
another person who doesn’t care about how you dress. nor how you look as long as you’re being yourself!
JAEHYUN
oh, younger definitely and a shorter s/o
definitely doesn’t mind an english speaking s/o, although he would prefer someone who can speak korean as well. with s/o’s of other languages, he wouldn’t mind learning your language, although give him some time
the language barrier will be a bit awkward a first tho, but if you know minimal english, i think that’s more than enough for jaehyun to at least steer the convo!
jaehyun is the guy to always give me first love, love from high school vibes so he’s usually the one to embrace you, but LOVES it when you’re the one to initiate contact and affection
jaehyun knows he’s good looking, but he does want an s/o who loves him for who he is, who sees all his good traits as equal to his looks. he would also like an s/o who has a live in the moment mindset, bc he spends a lot of time in his idol life, that a carefree s/o to take him away from the stress of idol life would really help
a sucker for a cute style ngl, pastels and clips in your hair and stuff.
WINWIN
wouldn’t mind someone a tad bit older, although i can see him with a younger person/same aged person too
shorter s/o!
sicheng wouldn’t care much for appearance, but he likes it when his s/o is confident, or in general confidence attracts him like the other guys in this post. that confidence would allow for him to be ‘guided’ in the relationship
would lean more towards a chinese/korean speaking person, but would try forming a r/s with someone of a different race to see how the language barrier would work
someone who is respectful of his space 100%. winwin wants someone who knows their boundaries in a context that there’s this sense of “i know when he’s feeling upset and wants to be left alone”, something like unspoken exchanges that the other just understands
sicheng also likes when his s/o is a little playful and cheeky, but not to the extent of the boys. just the right amount of outgoingness i guess haha. he would accommodate a bit of wildness, but sometimes it tires him out so you’ll need to know when to tone it down
JUNGWOO
feel like he would lean to an older s/o, but not necessarily needing to keep him in check because you’d be on the other side entertaining his antics lol
jungwoo uses up a lot of his energy tho, so sometimes he tends to go quiet and just likes to slump in your embrace
when he’s not quiet tho, he’s pretty cheeky in a sneaky kinda way and would want someone to reciprocate that.
jungwoo would also like an s/o who cheers him on a lot. he’s a bit insecure naturally, so he would want someone who doesn’t miss a beat to tell him that he’s doing good that day and would like a random compliment sometimes
would like to be held more than holding someone tbh
he wouldn’t care much for appearance, but does lean more towards cutesy appearances
LUCAS
younger and shorter s/o
would want an s/o to just calm down and rest with at times. sure he likes to have fun with his members and with his partner, but most dates with his partner has him in their arms and usually involves a calm activity
i mentioned this in chenle’s one as well, but the happiness he feels with his members is different from the one he feels with his partner, although lucas’ one is more of a blur where chenle’s a bit more distinct. does this make sense
wouldn’t ask much in an s/o, tbh. even if they’re just doing nothing, as long as lucas know he’s making you happy then he’s content with that. like when you’re smiling and loving him, then that’s all he really needs to be honest
lucas would not mind taking up an r/s with a foreign s/o, although he would have trouble with language barriers. would prefer a chinese/catonese speaking partner bc then he’s able to practise his dialect. he’d have a korean-speaking s/o too, although he sometimes stumbles over his korean a teeny bit
would love a cute style definitely!!!
MARK
same age, probably. he would feel more comfortable in terms of affection and conversation i feel!
equal amount of who holds who, but loves when his s/o initiates and cuddles him first
likes baggy clothes on you tbh, likes to match appearances and styles with you
wouldn’t mind an s/o of any race. he’s dedicated to learning your language if anything, the man likes to learn about new things
mark just wants someone fun to be around who returns his laughter and jokes, kinda like how johnny does
he’s suffered enough from johnny though (“ah, mark! the smell!”) and would probably like it if you defend him instead LOL (sometimes you poke fun tho)
he would also want his s/o to just reciprocate him in terms of laughter and happiness level. mark is always so bubbly that he wants someone to smile at him and laugh with him
XIAOJUN
would like an older s/o ngl, i feel like he would want to be guided as well
doesn’t care if you’re tall or short tbh
but would like an s/o who brings him out of his shell like the members do.
he wants to be able to laugh without trouble around his s/o and let loose. xiaojun sometimes gets annoyed, mostly feigned annoyance, so it would be nice for an s/o to fit in like the members: making fun of his angry face and rolling eyes and then having some light banter
he’s also gonna need an s/o who’s not afraid to pull him back whenever he says out of pocket things. they’re not necessarily harmful just extremely blunt at times that makes you cringe and you have to pull him back to tell him of his comments LOL
xiaojun would... not go into an r/s with a foreign partner i feel, but he will TRY if the conversation is not too awkward, save for like activities and such. like others in this post, he’ll make an effort if he’s committed to you, and only if you’re sure of dating him as well
xiaojun loves a cute style lawd!
HENDERY
same age, younger, older, tbh i don’t think hendery cares that much
he would want a shorter s/o though, i feel
wants a fun and playful s/o, someone who’s just so enjoyable to be around that he sometimes forgets himself and gets lost in the happiness you two give out
he does also want an s/o who can make him shy and basically challenge his personality, but not in a headbutt way where it’s your same two personalities against each other. it’s rather two variations of the same feeling like your playful aura against hendery’s playful aura, which would be honestly quite fun to watch and experience bc you’re just trying to one-up each other
and idk, because he’s talkative quite often, he feels like it would be nice to be the flustered, eyes-wide one for once
hendery in a foreign partner relationship... he would try, but i think he’d be a little intimidated at the languages that he has to have some time to warm up. he would commit and make the effort if he was willing to, though
oversized fits are his shit!!!! he also doesn’t mind seeing you explore with your appearance and style, esp in the goth or rebel kinda style
RENJUN
same age or younger, wouldn’t mind if you were taller since he knows his height is not THAT high
renjun loves for you to hold him though
the cheeky lad wants a laid back s/o, who doesn’t take life so seriously as well and like hendery, would like it if his s/o was a bit goofy and playful
would also want an s/o who’s deep about the universe and stuff, kinda intelligent to debate alien life and what not, he wants to be able to talk to you about anything and keep the conversation going even if you’re talking about something simple and dumb like snacks
i also can’t exactly see renjun go for a foreign s/o, mainly because of the language barrier, but i can see him trying if he’s able to get help from mark hyung and if the situation allows for you to meet frequently
renjun would definitely like a cute style on his s/o, but also would like more flashy or out-of-the-box outfits. as long as you’re comfy then he’s fine
JENO
same age. he likes to be taken care of though, would maybe be a 60/40 split of you taking care vs him taking care of you respectively
i feel like jeno would like a shorter s/o!
cute s/o, maybe matching up to the personality of jaemin since he was his longest friend from before. enthusiastic while he takes the back seat and admires you
while jaemin loses his social battery over time, jeno wouldn’t mind if you were a literal menace like haechan bc he feels that would make the r/s really fun
see him preferring a korean-speaking person. kinda like doyoung but not quite, he’s more careful than serious (?) about his idol life, and he wouldn’t want to take the risk
HAECHAN
same age or older i feel. equal split of who’s the embracer in the relationship though
wouldn’t mind a taller person, although he’d prefer if you were around the same height bc he doesn’t want to be teased by his members lol
i feel like haechan would rlly like y2k outfits on his s/o? a mix of baggy outfits as well as cute ones
his natural outgoing personality allows him to get together with a foreign person i feel, bc he’d suggest things that don’t need talking like bowling or an arcade y’know? he struggles a bit with native languages tho, bc he’s so used to speaking korean
btw please egg him on, he loves it when you do it and also do dumb things with him. he would want someone who doesn’t take life so seriously while also possessing the ability to think deeply i feel, but mostly someone who can keep smiling and strong even through hardships. kinda a happy-go-lucky personality
JAEMIN
younger, i feel. like johnny he has a lot of affection to give like he usually does to jisung…. jisung is grown up alr tho so :”(
loves giving the cuddles, big spoon, etc. he just wants you to feel loved no matter what size you are
he also would love tall people ngl! although sometimes he can’t decide between short and tall people
jaemin would appreciate an affectionate s/o who’s committed to him and also a person who’s just naturally shy i feel
they don’t necessarily need to return the energetic bursts of aegyo or stuff (he’d love it though) and also someone who just enjoys life and the small little things in general
would not mind dating a foreigner, would love to learn about your native language actually!
he likes cutesy appearances i reckon, a bit of oversized styles but overall likes the pastels
YANG YANG
same age or older, likes to be taken care of tbh
yang yang is also someone who doesn’t care if you’re short or tall, and likes you either way :)
does not mind a foreign person, plus he’s moved countries a little and could maybe find solace in the fact that his homes are sometimes not fixed, esp with how many languages he speaks as well
yang yang would want an s/o who lives up to his excitement in jokes and memes. he would feel a bit down if you happen to not understand a joke although he cant blame you, but he would want someone almost identical to him?
create chaos together and then fall asleep together
can see him liking a cute style tbh, and also reaaaaally likes to match outfits with you in your own respective styles
SHOTARO
same age, def.
i think being in nct has made him a little shy as compared to before when he was in a dance crew, so he’d need someone to encourage him while also taking care of him!!
talking to a non japanese- or korean- speaking person might scare him, so he would settle just for that. shotaro wouldn’t mind in a sense if he knows the other person is committed, but the language barrier for the first few dates would be awkward
ooohhh likes it when people are confident definitely, comfortable in their own skin. shotaro is another person i feel would really be attracted to y2k fits
like i said earlier, shotaro just needs a little push, which would help with an outgoing s/o and someone who’s not afraid to try new things. he feeds off your confidence and uses that to boost his!
CHENLE
doesn’t mind an s/o who is the same age or a tad bit older, i’m not sure if i see him with a younger s/o
doesn’t care if you’re tall or short as long as you give him his damn hugs!!!!
outgoing personality? check. he would literally befriend anyone, and wouldn’t mind a foreign s/o who doesn’t speak korean or chinese. with his limited english, he could probably make an outing fun by doing activities together and will learn your language!!
an s/o who can calm him down. chenle uses up his energy a lot and can get worn out and just wants someone to embrace at the end of the day. i wouldn’t say its similar to taeyong who’s sometimes tired from taking care of the members, but rather in a way where it’s a little playful and bubbly in your own little circle.
it’s a different kind of happy that chenle feels with you as opposed to the joy that the members bring him.
chenle also would want someone who’s sure of themselves, more so in personality rather than apperance. he likes all sizes and colours and styles, altho leans more toward the oversized sector
SUNGCHAN
sungchan is bit mischievous, so i feel like he naturally lean towards an s/o who can kinda be the “mother slash partner” of him: either the same age or younger, leaning more toward a same aged s/o
lawd this man is so tall. i think he’d want a shorter partner, sometimes a bit awkward with the affection but overall likes to give it. plus point: he likes to see you struggle wrap your body around his to get all of him in your cuddles
he wants to be able to relate to them and wouldn’t want awkwardness, so i don’t think he would go for a foreign person as of now
sungchan likes someone to have fun with him, ofc he’s aware that he can’t take away all their problems but he would want his s/o to feel relaxed and content around him with his goofy personality
sungchan likes a cutesy style, maybe, BUT i always see him being really drawn to y2k fits!!!
JISUNG
leaning more towards the same age (+/-1). i think a noona would make him shy and a younger s/o would just feel weird to him idk.
this man is also very tall, so probs a shorter s/o,,,,, would not mind if you are tall though!! he just likes to have you in his arms instead of the other way round (so you can’t see his flushed face)
not sure if he’d commit to a r/s that is foreign, but he would try with the help of mark-hyung or something. the reason why he’d take it was because the members would help me, but if not, he wouldn’t take the risk with his idol life at stake.
jisung wants someone who’s self-assured as well, strong in mettle and who has a strong character that helps him build up his drive. seeing you in your element helps him achieve more and he appreciates that you are able to provide him with a source of motivation
jisung likes cute stuff, but he does like oversized fits!
#nct#nct scenarios#nct imagines#nct fluff#nct angst#nct smut#nct headcanons#nct blurbs#nct reactions#nct 127 fluff#nct 127 scenarios#nct dream#nct dream imagines#jeno scenarios#jaemin imagines#johnny x reader#mark scenarios#jisung x reader#wayv scenarios#nct 127 smut#kun x reader#haechan scenarios#donghyuck fluff#nct timestamps#hendery x reader#yuta imagines#yuta nakamoto#winwin fluff#wayv reactions#nct drabbles
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hi, genuinely curious, why do you think you know so much about bts’s personal lives? like just shipping real people in general that you don’t now personally, bc i saw some of ur posts(not just u, a LOT of others seem to think the same) and i’m confused like how do you know all that from a video/photo?
Ask 2: hi i think i might have sounded rude in my last anon and im so so sorry if i did, i don’t mean to sound mean but english isn’t my first language and i don’t now how else to write it.
What i mean is i just can’t see it, but so many ppl including you seem convinced jimin and jungkook are a couple? i now there’s probably something i’m missing that’s obvious to everyone else bc to me they just seem like really good and close friends, so like what is it that you think makes it obvious?? (again i’m just genuinely curious abt this pls don’t take it the wrong way 💜)
I’m not clairvoyant and don’t claim to know what goes on behind closed doors. I have said time and time again that we have no way of knowing what goes on when the cameras are off or when they are in private, unless they tell us.
I do speculate sometimes and make assumptions based on the content I’ve seen, but always original content, and not edited clips.
I have also made it clear every single time that these are my opinions and conclusions, take them or leave them.
There is a ton of BTS content out there to go through, which includes, just as an example (because there is so much more): Run BTS episodes, interviews (video, written and radio), member Tweets, memories, Bon Voyage, packages (summer, winter), Bangtan bombs, fan meets, Musters, concerts etc.
You need to watch original content, because, and it saddens me to say this, there is some Jikook YT content that is distorted, edited, slow motioned to fit the story, and not all of it is ‘real’ in the sense, that if you see the original content, see the true moment within it’s context and in real speed, well, it isn’t a ‘real’ moment. I have called out some of those moments in the past.
But there are things you can’t fake.
There a several moments that solidified for me the special connection between JK & JM.
Watch original content over the years and you will see there is something special between those two, a special and strong connection. JK clearly finds JM as someone he can confide in and someone that can calm him or console him in times of need. He has said it in interviews and we have seen him do so in the content out there.
JM is JK’s anchor. His safe place.
JK is JM’s happy place. When JM is down JK is the one who knows how to cheer him up. Even Jin had mentioned it once in an interview.
JK is JM’s protector in sorts. We’ve seen them at the airports, we’ve seen him carry JM after concerts.
They are super close. We know they constantly choose to travel together in the same car (when every member has their own car and they are the only ones together)... They choose spend ‘off time’ together - bowling, going to watch a movie, ice skating with each other. JK himself told us in BV4 that the only members he sae during their time off were JM & Hobi. They are just super close.
So what made me make the one step further and conclude they are romantically involved?
There are several things that pushed me over the edge. Some of them are:
First, the content, again. There is content out there that is way beyond “we are very close platonic friends”. Things they say or do in front of the camera that give you so much “we are a couple” vibe.
There is content that makes you feel like you are intruding on a very intimate private moment:
MAMA 2018 is one of them. I can’t say one, because there are so many moments there that are “WOW, what’s going on here?”
Rose Bowl is also such a moment that is as clear as day, with no acceptable logical explanation other than: “there is something more between those two”.
Those are only 2 examples, but there are many more such moments, where the intimacy level is way more than even the best platonic friendship out there.
You don’t need to be a rocket scientist to put 1 & 1 together here. These moments are loud and clear.
There are the more subtle moments too, those that add up on you, those that if you will look at each of them by themselves you would say: “yeah, nothing here”, but when you put them together, another one and another one and another one, well the conclusion is pretty much clear.
It’s JM’s Tweets, their matching clothing over the years, their choice to spend time together, their private trip, GCFT, JK’s choice to put JM front and center in all his other GCF’s, the way they look at each other, the way they talk about each other, the two very famous lives from 2016 (Tae’s & Hobi’s), their own lives (OMG), things JM tells us (like waking up and seeing JK is what makes him happy these days), “you are me I am you”, the way they touch, especially during the first few years (2016-2018), those hesitant light touches & brushes (if skinship is not an issue here, why do they hesitate so much to touch each other??? when they have no problem doing so with the others, all when we do know just how close they are), the way they talk to each other, they way JK lets JM get away with shit, while he doesn’t the other members, the way JK drops honorifics with JM +++++ so much more.
There another couple of independent points that helped to push me over the edge too.
The first is the other members reactions when JK & JM go on with their shenanigans. RM, Hobi, Jin, Suga & Tae all react differently, each and every one of them has a tell. Suga and Tae go blank many times. Jin lowers his head. Hobi either had a worried look on his face or a big fat smile, and RM, well he’s the most obvious out of the lot. It’s facial expressions, uneasy movement, fisting his thighs, looking to Hobi or Suga with pleading eyes, running to the two thinking he might have to defuse a moment, separating the two when he feels it’s needed. It’s all that and then some. Now if there is nothing ‘more’ going on between those two, why is all of that even necessary??? Those two’s interactions on camera just make the rest of the group nervous, especially RM. Ask yourself the question: why??
Another thing I keep asking myself is, if these two are clearly super close, why is there a constant need to downplay their closeness? This is something that is done by BTS and BH as well as the fandom. And I find it hard to understand, again, if there is nothing extra going on between them, why downplay them. You may disagree with me on this, but to me it seems they are way closer than JM & Tae, but they are called ‘soulmates’ while JK & JM are ‘nothing’? It’s like they are there, and it’s clear as day just how close they are, but it’s not a subject they are allowed to talk about. And the way the fandom is as much as ignoring it also raises so many questions for me. If this is an innocent platonic close friendship, why ignore it? How come the fandom isn’t celebrating it?
Thing is, that not only does the fandom ignore their connection, they are being hated for it. The level of anti and hatred out there towards them is unbelievable. And yet again, that raises the question of why? If nothing is going on there why such anti towards those two, together, in particular?
At the end of the day, I guess life experience is probably what helps me out here. I have been around for a while, experienced love and heartbreak, and also a long term relationship. I know the signs, you could say. It helps being able to assess a situation and read into it.
It’s ok to question yourself. I do so constantly. I watch and re-watch content. I read interviews, I question my logic, my conclusions. I, just like any normal person, do have self doubt at times. Believe me, I would not have written what I have before checking and re-checking myself. And still, these are my conclusions. I believe that JK & JM are not only super close, but also romantically involved. There you have it.
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So, about Bi Caleb
Warning: very long post, discussing bi representation and biphobia.
*Sorry for spelling errors, English ain’t my firts language.
I can’t believe I have to tell you guys, but anyways: Caleb is bi whether he ends with a male character, a female character on a non binary character. That’s what bi people do, you know? they experience atraction for all genders. Saying that a bi character that ends with someone of the opposite gender is straight and queerbaiting is incredibly biphobic.
Yes, Vax was bisexual. Yes, he ended up with Kiki. Get fucking over it.
Now, I can understand why LGBT+ fans may feel disappointed when they tease a “gay couple” but the “straigth” couple ends up being endgame. Notice the quotation marks because there’s not such thing as a straight or gay couple for a bi person. They are bisexual in both situations, but I can see where the problem comes from. I’ve been queerbaited to hell and back by a lot of shows and it really hurts. It feels like they are laughting at you for caring. But I want those fans (whose feelings are totally valid, don’t get me wrong) to consider a few things when it comes to Critical Role, the first one being: it’s a D&D game.
Let me explain, because I know a lot of CR fans haven’t experienced what D&D is like in real life (and that’s absolutely valid, you don’t need to play D&D to enjoy CR). This is an improvisation game, not an scripted TV show. In a Tv show you can plan ahead of time what ship is going to be endgame, what themes are gonna come up for each character and it’s easier to deeply explore sexuality and gender as different planned arcs. In D&D you character’s sexuality may or may not come up depending on how you play it. Take for instance how other CR character’s have stated their sexuality:
Beau: overtly. Very *In your face* kind of lesbian. Marisha said “fuck it, I really just want to romance girls and be bad ass”
Yasha: openly, but not as in your face. Ashley Jhonson wanted to drink from that WLW cup while also being a shy disaster. Seafood market is her favored terrain.
Caduceus: Our Ace king has never hidden his sexuality, and yet he didn’t mention anything about it until chapter 114. He didn’t had the need to either hide it or state it. He was simply vibing.
I think Liam is going that route with Caleb. He’s flustered by Essek and Edwulf (Come on you guys, he always asks Matthew if he’s still hot). He also had/has a thing for Astrid and a think he might have feels for our favorite Tiefling gal. I know we are all too used to characters being teased as gay/bi only to have execs pull a “haha jk they be straight”. But this is not Sherlock or Supernatural. This is a show that not only has queer rep, but also supports queer organizations and creators. Hell, I’m sure some of the cast members are LGBT (but I’m not here to speculate on real people’s sexuality). If Caleb shows attraction to men he is not just queerbaiting, doing it for fanservicing or tricking the fans in any way shape or form: he’s just portraying a bi character. The thing is, since this is not a TV show, he is not doing it por woke points or to send a message. He’s doing it because he wants to play a bi wizard with depression.
So maybe there will be a point in which he can explores his sexuality more deeply, but remember he is playing a game. And his character is one that has a lot of trouble opening up to his feelings. Caleb is not someone that makes sexual jokes or flirty remarks. He is shy, awkward and has developed a really fucked up sense of love that he is now slowly fixing. Hell, in the same Talks episode Liam explained that Caleb was trained on Honey-pot tactics. Which, for those of you who can’t stand Bond films, means seducing your enemy/target to get information, manipulate them or assassinate them. WHICH IS A REALLY FUCKED UP THING! Let’s remember how he was the one to push Fjord to sleep with Advantica so they could spy on her. That boy has Issues when it comes to relationships. So if we don’t see him being as overtly gay as Beau, Molly or Yasha, well maybe it’s because that’s the way Caleb is. Bi people don’t owe you flamboyance, or dating both guys and gals for your approval.
I wouldn’t make a post if it was only that, because I do feel the people who are aching for good bi rep and would love some more explicit confirmation. But Vax exists, so I know we can’t have good things down here.
VAX EXPLICITELY SHOWED ATTRACTION TO GILMORE. AS EXPLICIT AS IT GETS. HE FUCKING KISSED HIM. THEY WERE PRACTICALLY DATING. AND YET SOME OF YOU FUCKERS CALL HIM QUEERBAITING. AND I SAY: NOT ON MY WATCH! NOT ON MY FUCKING WATCH!!
How come a character can have canonically kissed another character in a romantic/sensual context and still be called straight? I know fucking Sherlock traumaticed y’all into having trust issues but believe me when I tell you: I’ts not that deep. This is not a “Haha I love u but in a no homo way bro”. It’s a “full homo darling, but also we’re gonna break up because I like someone else”. This is the opposite of queerbaiting. Instead of keeping a charade he was honest with Gilmore because he valued his feelings and realized that he couldn’t reciprocate them at that moment. And if you try to tell me that Vaxleth was forced and didn’t have a reason to exist except queerbaiting, let me tell you: you are wrong.
Vax saw Gilmore once or twice monthly while he spent a heck ton of time with Kiki. Sure, they didn’t had the kind of camera chemistry Gilmore and Vax had because Keyleth is not charismatic. She’s really awkward, and her relationship with Vax was more on the adorable and dorky side of things. I bring this up because I’m predicting something similar may happen to Shadowgast.
Trust me, I ship the hot wizards as much as any other critter (even though I’m a multishipper). But they haven’t talked to Essek in centuries. I think it may have been almost a month in rol and quite a few outside. And you have to take into account out-rol time to because they are humans (except Tal) playing a game and they forget about stuff (except Marisha and Matt). So Shadowgast may not happen because sure, they had really good chemistry for a month a month ago. People have crushes that die down over time All The Time. So maybe don’t be so butthurt about your ship not being canon that you accuse an ally of homophobia.
The cast of CR put forward such an amazing representation for the LGBT+ community and it really hurts me that you gets stuck on the one thing that isn’t canon. Matt has created a world in which coming out is not necessary because no one assumes your sexuality. A world in which people respect pronouns and orientations (except Tary’s father, who is a villain). A world in which Cad or Caleb don’t need to explicitly say “I’m ace/bi” unless it comes up in conversation. A world in which his friends can be whatever they want to be without pressure or reprecusions. A world in which they get to explore different gender identities and sexual orientations with full freedom. Let’s not interfere with that (unless there’s missrepresentation), and let them play their game. If you really need mlm or wlw canon couples or more outwardly LGBT+ people you have plenty examples among NPCs and other cast members (Allura and kima, Yasha, Beau, Dairon, Keg, Reani, Tary, Molly and Vax among others).
There’s way worst shows taking LGBT+ cred for barely doing nothing. Fucking Supernatural is the most recent example! Critical Role works towards showing an honest portrayal of LGBT+ folk and accepts valid criticism from their fans on the subject (when they changed J’Mon Sa Ord pronouns from it to they/them). They don’t owe you making your ship canon or portraying their characters the way you want them to (again, unless when it’s constructive criticism). Stop being so Fucking entitled and enjoy the show for what it is
,Respectfully~
*Edit: I´m tagging Caleb’s ships into the post because most hate comes from shipping wars. Most Shadowgast fans are respectful of the cast’s decisions, even if it disappoints them. But since I’ve already seen people accusing Liam of biphobia in that tag and since I’ve already seen this shit with Vaxmore I’m tagging the ship. If you want to read my long ass post do it, if not, ignore it. I’m not forcing you to read it. I’ve also tagged it with biphobia so people can avoid it if it’s triggering. I’m sorry if it makes you mad that your ship is not canon, but that’s not an excuse to be toxic to the cast. Those of you getting mad are the ones that need to read this the most. Like I’ve said in the post: you’re allowed to be disappointed, you are allowed to want more, but you can’t force the cast to give you exactly what you want. And most certainly, you can’t accuse them of some very serious stuff like biphobia and queerbaiting when it’s not the case..
#Critical Role#Critical Role Rant#Bi Caleb#Shadowgast#Shadowulf#I swear to good#widofjord#I swear to Melora#Widowjest#Talks Machina#lgbt discourse#Rant#Jesus this is long#Vax#vax'ildan#Vaxmore#I'm so fucking done with this fandom sometimes#Vaxleth#How to be biphobic while asking for bi representation#liam o'brien#trigger warning biphobia#tw biphobia#Critical role discourse#queerbaiting
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