Currently feeling: the part where he kills you

having chronic depersonalization/derealization is truly so horrifying.

like I've been having consistent out of body experiences for ten years now but the thing is it doesn't really get better because feeling like all this is unfamiliar and has never happened before is kind of the whole thing.

so it's not like I can tell myself this has happened before and i'll be fine. cus every time it feels like I got dropped onto the face of the earth five minutes ago

they call it the deadline bc it kills me dead instantly with a powerful beam that is simultaneously as hot as the sun and as cold as the emptiness of space

🏫🍃🌥️

ugghhhngnnghb im spiiiralllinnggg agaaainnn im so damn sorry for the inactivity everyone :(((

I have to leave the house at seven tomorrow 😭😭😭

all i do is complain about how much work i have to do and then Not do any the work

Omg my AirPods fell under the bed and I would get them if my d a d w a s n t s l e e p i n g o n t h e b e d

might just drop this ellie x reader text fic for no reason tonight idk

September 1 clocks in and I'm sick again :<<

guy who is so anxious

I’m still waiting for the universe to patch the glitch that is being fully awake with only 4 hours of sleep vs getting a full nights sleep and still being tired.

crrrrrAMPS MY ABHORRED

🤕🩹💊

Mmmsomnia

I kinda want to break up with my boyfriend, but when I started this relationship I told myself I wouldn't be the one to break things again and I would actually fucking try to make things work BUT that's exactly what I have been trying since we started dating and I feel like we really don't work on long term and now he kinda annoyed the shit out of me these last two weeks and I hate myself because my brain wants to use that as an excuse to break up which is unfair to him. Like is not his fault I had a bad day man. That's my fucking personality he just got lucky enough to only see me in a bad mood twice. (I really try my best to stop being so mean and easy to annoy in those moments, but yk how's life).

Is just... we are so similar as a personality which I thought it would be good (cuz yk relating and stuff like that- and would also kinda force us from our comfort zone, both being shy and stuff) but is actually NOT and we have some things in common but actually nothing at all. I think our main talking subject is work cuz we don't know what to talk about anything else. We tried to agree to watch something together and talk about it but... yeah. And I don't think it would have worked, taking in consideration that we watched Thor Love & Thunder together and all we said was that it was ok the movie and moved on. Like I literally tried to ask him if he has any favorite scenes and stuffs like that and gave me nothing to work with. And I had a lot to say about that movie, but idk he makes me feel weird trying to talk about stuffs like that. I hate it. That I don't feel comfortable enough to talk about things I like. And I'm thinking maybe that's the case for him too, yk? And it sucks cuz it kinda forces us on standby.