so it's my birthday today!!! 😎 i'm 23 years old, and i've had this blog for almost 3 years now, so i thought now is as good a time as any to celebrate!

because i thought it would be fun, i've decided to curate a list of some of my favorite blorbos in their respective pairings and put them into this poll! after a week, i will make a special gifset for the ships that make it into the top 5 spots!

the winning ships will be announced in their own special post and anyone can join in on the fun and make a gifset/fan-art/writing/etc of the top 5 ships as well! just @ me in the post or include the tag #emilysbbb and i'll be sure to share it! :D

rules:

reblogs aren't necessary but are greatly appreciated!

if you want to, you can put your 2nd and 3rd choices in the tags, i'll make sure to add those to the calculations when the poll is over! :)

this is a very silly, unserious poll, and this is not my complete and definitive list of favorite ships (since tumblr polls only allow 12 choices rip), this is all just for funsies!

tagging some mutuals below the cut:

no pressure to reblog!! just thought it would be fun to give yall a heads up and the chance to be the first ones to vote! <3

@latr1nal1a @willgaham @milkovichys @his-name-is-ed @stedebonnets @blakbonnet @rainbowbonnet @kendallroycos @userstede @figmentof @captain-flint @cobbbvanth @startreklesbian @crowleyaj @queerbuck @djarin @djaarins @captain-stede @torybrennan @seance @dykefaggotry @ad-astrah @nobie @edwarbteach @stars-bean @jacobglaser

hey everyone!! so, originally, i wanted to do one of these back when all of y'all were posting your 'follow forever' + favorite blogs lists for new year's eve, but at that point in time i didn't feel like i knew anyone well enough to make a full list. but now, it's been almost nine months (holy shit!!!) since i joined this fandom, and there have been so many people that i've connected with and who have made my experience on here so much fun and so special.

plus...it's my birthday today, so i thought - what better way to celebrate it than to show my immense love & appreciation for all my mutuals, followers friends, and anyone who has ever made my tumblr experience better?

this isn't really in any particular order, and also, i am so so sorry if i forgot anyone. i had to type this out at least six times over the past two months because tumblr kept deleting my progress for some reason, so i'm really sorry if i missed anyone because of it. i recognize the urls of anyone that regularly interacts with my posts, so i promise that if you've ever left nice tags in the reblogs of my gifs or replied to any of my WIPS or tagged me in a gifset or in a tag game or sent me a nice ask or anything at all, really, please know that i think you're wonderful and i love you all so much even if tumblr hates me and decided to erase all of the evidence of it 😅

okay, enough dillydallying!! putting this under a cut so that it doesn't swallow ur dash whole....n here we go :)

@fireplceashes hi jen!! i know i said like. just one paragraph above that this was in no particular order, but i immediately broke the no. 1 rule of law and lied, bc as my very first friend in this fandom you are so undoubtedly so special to me and i'm putting you first just because i Can and no one can stop me. but anyway. where do i even begin with you? you are easily one of the sweetest people i have Ever, ever met - not just on tumblr, but in my real life as well - and i really love talking to you So much. thank you so much for always listening to my rants, and checking up on me, and just generally being there for me. you're just a really soothing person to talk to and i never have to worry about being 'too much' or anything like that when i'm talking to you. and of course - you are also so, so talented, and your gifs are absolutely stunning. they always turn out so beautifully, and i'm so in awe of your editing skills. basically...i'm just Very grateful to have met you, and *mike wheeler voice* all of my other mutuals, they're great, but my fandom experience would not be the same without you ❤️

@basiltonpitch spencer!! i feel the need to echo the first thing i said to you and remind you that i think you're a genius :') fun fact that i haven't told you: when i first found your blog, even before i realized that you were That person who wrote the benvi meta that i loved, the first posts that i saw from you were your beautiful web weavings, and i was immediately like Who is this person??? and Who gave them the permission to stomp all over my heart like this?? wtf?? i just. i love ur brain So so much and i'm so grateful that i get to enjoy your creativity in not one but two of my favorite fandoms (soon to be 3 with 911 maybe?) oh also...this is slightly embarrassing but i've gone back through your blog a few times just so i can read your incredible meta because all of your thoughts are so valuable to me. you are the Only person on this site that i trust to Get devi vishwakumar and one of the biggest reasons why i'm so excited for never have i ever s4 to drop is so that i can experience it alongside you!! and even outside of your creative genius, you are one of my favorite people to talk to bc you're so kind and so supportive and such an absolute sweetheart and i really love hearing everything you have to say. so. um. basically. i am just a Spencer Enthusiast through and through 💖

@padmedala carson!! hello!! first off, i've said this to you a million times, but i want to thank you once again for writing one of my favorite pieces of byler fanfiction. do you know that one post about reading fanfics and having to stop because 'he would not say that?' well, your work is the epitome of reading a fic and feeling wholly satisfied because yes, he would say that - in fact, i would not hesitate for a minute to say that you have the strongest grasp on will and mike's characterization - especially their dynamic together - out of any writer i've met in this entire fandom. like...i enjoy your writing so much that i've read a couple of your pieces for IT despite not having any knowledge of the source material simply because i wanted to experience more of your work. you're also such a deeply kind and supportive person, and you have no idea how much i appreciate every single time you've checked up on me or sent me a sweet message or even just dropped into my inbox to say hello. you make my dash infinitely brighter, and i'm so very glad to know you and have you as a friend on here 💞

@wllbyers dani!! hi!! i have so much to say abt how wonderful you are, and i was struggling w how to articulate this for a while, but then i remembered that you once said to me that you found my presence on the dash comforting, and honestly, that's exactly how i feel about you. forgive me for the awkward metaphor, but seeing you on the dash is like coming home after a long day and having a warm, home-cooked meal. seeing your url and icon always makes me smile, and i'm so grateful that we're mutuals because of how kind, considerate, and utterly genuine you are!! i don't know if i'm describing this right, but you just feel so real, you know? i feel like your personality shines through with every post you make, and i always love seeing it. and i'm sorry if this is weird to say, but your openness and your authenticity about everything going on in your life makes me feel a little bit less alone about my own struggles. also do you remember when you started watching 911 and eventually ended up getting ahead of me, and you tagged each and every one of your posts just so that i wouldn't get spoiled? i know it seems simple, but the sheer fact that you thought of doing that just for me had me melting into a little puddle w my face looking like that one meme of kristen bell. you are just so, so lovely and i'm unbelievably glad we're mutuals 🥰

@willblogger ima i've said this many times before but i absolutely Need to say it again: you are genuinely the funniest person on byler tumblr. i cannot count the number of times that you've made me full-on belly laugh (to the point where my stomach starts to hurt) and completely destroyed my attempts to casually and inconspicuously scroll through tumblr in public places. i dunno how you do it at all but every single thing you say is such an absolute delight and i am always giggling n kicking my feet when i read the tags on all of your posts. the thousands of people on tiktok and twitter copying your jokes could never do it like you. you've also got this deep understanding of the way the text has been written and i really appreciate how your analysis honors the characters as they are instead of trying to make them more palatable them for this fandom. it's just. it's rare to find people that love these characters as they are and understand them as well as you do and i feel very lucky to have found your blog. also this is not related at all but ur plushies are cute as fuck & i love them :) OH!! n thank u sm for being my number one stevebucky enthusiast mutual n partner in rage when it comes to avengers endgame!! can't wait to have a hate party w you (if you'd like) in five days 💗

@willelfanpage SARA HI HELLO do u see me waving at you. this is me holding up a banner screaming abt how much i love you. as the resident fandom cheerleader who gives and gives and gives so much love to everyone she interacts with, you deserve someone cheering YOU back on and that is what i am here to do!! you are so brilliant and you have never made an incorrect post in your life!!! all your fics are wonderful and i've loved reading them!! you are kind, you are smart, you are funny, and you make everyone around you feel so safe and comfortable and welcome here. like. i can't tell you how much i admire how open you are with your kindness and friendship and how you give it so freely to everyone you interact with. i love talking to you so much - whether it's hearing about your life or sharing our ideas with one another or just. venting about anything i want to - and your enthusiasm is utterly infectious and makes me feel more hyped and excited to be in fandom. forgive me for being so sappy on main but i will never not be touched by your endless love for fandom, not only these characters and the works that people make, but for the people around you as well and i hope u know i love u very much too 💞

@jackietaylcrs hii marianne fellow haver of good taste!! i remember you once made a post wondering if your followers would still love you if your stranger posting went down to 0.5% and i wanted to lyk that i definitely would!! i really like reading your commentary on ST and yellowjackets, but even when you're posting about a show that i'm not familiar with, you have this Way of speaking that i find very charming and funny and entertaining, and you bring this inimitable energy to my dash that i doubt i could ever find elsewhere. i like the way you sign off your posts with 'and like i say: brf slt.' i think it’s Neat n it fits you very well. alsooo THANK YOU very very much for being the one to convince me to watch yellowjackets!! people have been telling me to watch it for a long time but in the end it was your posts that made me say, fuck it, and finally watch it. also. um. ur posts abt stephen harrison make me feel very Seen so. thank u. ok bye 💗

@emblazons hello marie my beloved mutual marie!! honestly, out of everything in this post, this message was the hardest to write because i don't even know where to begin with you!! you bring so, so much to this fandom - your thoughtful, entertaining, levelheaded commentary, your stunning gifsets, your logical and witty posts, your incredibly supportive and kind personality, and your endless passion for this show and all that goes into making it, as well as our shared love & enthusiasm for noah schnapp 😅 every time i think you've made the most brilliant observation or put out the most beautiful set, you go and top yourself by finding something new or making an even prettier gifset. if i had to pick one person whose contributions to the fandom enriched my experience of this show? more than anyone, it would be you!! and i could go on and wax poetic about your talent forever (as i have on many, many occasions bc you deserve it 🥰), but i'm gonna end it here by saying that you are a gift to this fandom and one of my absolute favorite people on here, and that i'm beyond grateful to know you.

@mikeandwillel sandy!!!! you are so so smart and your analysis is absolutely incredible. i look forward to each and every one of your analyses because you always find the most clever parallels and your deep dives into each of these characters' arcs are always written with so much care and skill. and of course, i forever have you to thank for writing The ultimate masterpiece (your s4 painting arc analysis) that finally convinced me of byler endgame and thus made my fandom experience so much more relaxing and fun. i also really love & how much you love mike for all that he is -- i feel like it's a little rare in this fandom, so seeing how much you adore his true character and how you Understand him better than anyone else i've ever met makes me really happy. and not to mention, i have no idea how you managed to get so good at gifmaking in such a short amount of time but all your sets are so beautiful!! you're a gem fr 💖

@babygirl-jonathanbyers abbyyyyyy hello!! do you know how much i love seeing you on my dash? i love your pure, unapologetic love for jonathan, jancy, and the byers brothers and it really makes my whole day when i see a post from you appreciating those characters/ships. your moodboards are also So pretty and your presence on my dash is so positive and welcoming. i hope you're doing well on your hiatus rn and i can't wait to see you back on here again 🫂

@elmaxed lumiiiii hi!!!! when i think of you, honestly, the very first word that comes to mind is creative, because you bring so much to this fandom and i'm so grateful for it. i'm obsessed with everything you write because your fics are so lively and fun and make me smile uncontrollably every time i read them, all your headcanons are brilliant and adorable, your moodboards are gorgeous and not to mention, your themes are always so beautiful!! you're just...such a ray of sunshine on my dash and i'm so happy to have followed you 🥰

@mlchaelwheeler sarahhhhh my favorite stonathan pioneer and one of my first mutuals in this fandom!! i think you already know this but your analyses were a huge part of what got me into the byler fandom in the first place and i have never looked back, so thank you for that!! i Love love love ur theories (especially the s5 spec stuff) and i love seeing u in my notifs and reading your lovely and enthusiastic tags on everything you reblog and i love your love for st's OST!! you're a really smart, sweet, and positive person with the best opinions and i am forever rooting for mike to get a sword in s5 just for you 🙏🏼

@bylrndgm dearest elz you have no idea how happy your blog makes me 🥹 you're one of the most talented gifmakers i've ever met, and i always find myself smiling so much whenever i see you've posted something new (especially your byler x TS edits 🥰) because they're always so beautiful!! i've also always felt like your blog and everything you've posted is one of the purest and most expressions of love for mike and will....it's so clear that you love them So much and your blog makes me so happy to be part of this community. you've also always been so sweet to me throughout my entire time in this fandom and you're one of the people that has made me feel most welcome here. also since i never ended up responding to your DM i wanted to say that whatever path you choose, i'm sure that you're going to crush it and i am rooting for your success always 💖

@madcleradin sierra madcleradin byhops finalgirlbyers willcoded!! ok i promise i don't mean this in a weird parasocial way but i kind of admired you from a distance for a while even before we were mutuals just because every single one of your posts that ended up on my dash had me nodding my head and tapping my brain in agreement and clapping for u like this 👏🏼 all of your takes are top tier and i love how passionate you are about everything you talk about!! you're def one of the sweetest, friendliest, and coolest people on byler tumblr and following u has been such a gift ❣

@byclairs hello emily!! your gifs are absolutely stunning and i love following you because i Know i can always count on you to have the most based takes, both on stranger things (especially ur will takes - those keep me sane fr) and on fandom as a whole. also just wanna say that you have the best taste in ships and that you've got a 10/10 banger of a url that always has me mentally giving you a thumbs up whenever i see you on the dash ❤️

@heroesbyler stav!! you're one of the most brilliant analysts on this site and i'm so in awe of all of the incredible theories and analyses you've posted!! i'm obsessed w all of your banger gay mike posts & i'm also both fascinated and disturbed by all of the dots you've connected regarding brenner, henry, & the lab. your posts are so insightful and compelling and you've made me think about so many things that i never would've noticed on first glance. i also love that you're both unflinchingly confident but also insanely kind - a rarity in most fandoms, especially this one, and i love that energy on my dash. i'm very proud to be your grandma (your words not mine -- no i will not let you forget about that 🙏🏼)

@mandycantdecide hiiiii amanda!! i love your blog so much, and even though we don't share all of the same fandoms i love seeing your posts about everything you're interested in because i can always feel your energy and enthusiasm for it no matter what :) in fact, it was actually your posts that made me want to get back into 911, and you have no idea how grateful i am to you for that because being in that fandom is the most fun i've had in a really long time. so thank you, thank you thank you for that, and for generally being so sweet 💕

@howtobecomeadragon ayla!! hello!! i know we don't know each other super well but i Really wanted to let you know how much i appreciate your posts and all of your contributions to this fandom. you were one of my first favorite blogs when i first joined in august and you have no idea how thrilled i was when you followed me back haha 😅 i looooove your theory posts so much and i think your fics are fantastic (and i am Eagerly awaiting the end of come back to me and forgive everything so i can read it). you're also super sweet and kind to everyone around you, and i love seeing you on my dash 💞

@mrperfectlyfinetv hi jake!! as my designated Swiftie Mutual i feel like i should let you know that i don't usually follow taylor swift blogs bc swifties are scary but your gifs are so gorgeous and your takes are so good that i just Had to break my rule and follow you anyway. i really enjoy reading all of your opinions on miss swift even if you are a rep hater asdkjendfcskjflejrf and i adore all of your pretty ST and taylor swift gifsets!! i also love how much you love speak now and you've definitely made me go back and give it a few more listens so that i can appreciate it more & at this point i'm begging taylor to release speak now tv soon just for you 🫶

@magentamee - hi bre :) your art style is absolutely delicious and your writing is so cute and i've always noticed how committed you are to uplifting everyone around you in this fandom. also this is random but your friendship with amanda and @/likegoldintheair is so cute and whenever you guys post about each other i always find myself smiling at how sweet your interactions are. you’re just a person who always brings a smile to my face when i see you on the dash and i want to thank you for that 💗

@paintingformike hi!! i've said this before but i really do think you've always been The strongest soldier in the byler fandom (like, ngl your posts were Carrying byler tumblr for a while there while everyone was still in their debating-over-s5-canon phase). you've always been so levelheaded and astute with your observations, and i've always admired and respected how your posts make it seem so simple and So clear how all of the overarching themes of the show are leading to byler endgame. you've got an incredible way with words and i'm so glad to have you in our fandom 💞

-

and now for the creatives in this fandom - some incredible gifmakers whose beautiful sets have been the highlight of my dash, some wonderful writers who have ripped my heart out over and over again only to stitch it back together seamlessly just one paragraph later, and brilliant fan artists who are able to capture so much and make me feel the entire spectrum of human emotion with just a few brush strokes:

@sharpesjoy - em!! you're an absolute sweetheart and such a joy to see on my dash. all of your gifs are so gorgeous and so clearly infused with all of the love that you have for everything you watch and i've added several shows to my watchlist because your gifs have made me want to watch them so badly 💞

@heroeddiemunson - kai!! your creations are so beautiful and you have this unique gifmaking style that i'm totally obsessed with!! your colorings and typography are always so pretty and i Love how special and creative your sets are, especially the D&D character sheets. like.....i have no idea how u come up w all these incredible ideas but i'm so very glad u do bc my dash is better for it❣️

@kaliprasad - hi!! your blog is amazing and i'm so glad that i found it bc all your gifs are fantastic and i love them So much. i think your talent is insane tbh, that byers brothers set that you made for me a little while ago is still one of my favorite things i've seen on this whole site, and i love that you love them just as much as i do 🫂

@kingofscoops - no one, and i mean no one, does coloring like you!! all of your sets are so vibrant and bring so much life to my dash & i think the ST fandom is very lucky to have you ❤️

@aliecenthightower - emilia!! your gifs are stunning and i'm completely in love with your song lyric edits. they're all absolutely beautiful and i'm in awe of how perfect and emblematic the lyrics you choose are, like you just Get these characters, y'know?

@mayahawkins - MADDYYYYYYY you are So talented, and believe me when i say that your gifs have been the Biggest inspiration for my own gifmaking journey. all your sets are so pretty & i love everything you make - including your playlists which live rent free in my mind!! but as a reminder i also love following your blog for You and not just your gifs :) you're an incredibly sweet person and ur presence on my dash is utterly invaluable 💗

@padme-amidala - hi erika!! okay, calling you a gifmaker almost feels wrong because that word doesn't feel like enough to encompass how beautiful your work is...all ur ideas are So amazing and you have such a natural eye for color and detail!! it is so clear that you pour so much love into all of your creations, and if i'm being honest, one of the reasons why i am so grateful to be a byler shipper is so that i can appreciate your craft to the fullest. and you're also Such a genuinely kind person that i always look forward to seeing on the dash!! thank you for being so lovely!!

@wiseatom - hi thea!! your writing is the ultimate definition of comfort. when i read ur work, no matter what i'm doing physically, mentally i am in my cozy bed with the fireplace crackling in the corner, surrounded by twinkly lights and warm blankets, sipping hot cocoa bc that is the kind of emotion ur writing invokes ✨

@byeler - irene!! your fics were my introduction to the world of byler fics and i admire you and your writing so very much 💞 i don't know how it's possible for one person to have this much skill and talent, but you do, and i'm so grateful that you've chosen to share it with us. eagerly waiting on a new heavy hopes chapter was one of the highlights of my fandom experience and that fic is a piece of writing that i will always come back to over and over again 🫶

@astrobei - suni i have been reading fics for over a decade now and i have still never encountered a writer that does emotion quite like you do, devastating me with every single fic you put out. i promise i mean this in the best way possible but you're So damn good at capturing all of that heartbreak and pain and inflicting the same agony on your readers, and it would have killed me by now if not for the fact that you're equally good at writing the sweetest fluff that has me melting into a puddle whenever i read 🫂

@hopelessromanfic - lyssaaaa!!! i've been Such a huge fan of landslide ever since you started writing it - it's one of my all time favorite fics in the fandom and i'm obsessed with the storyline and your characterization in all of your fics 😍

@artistaquinterob - hi!! your art style is so ADORABLE and your use of color in your work is stunning and i just adore everything you draw, especially your will and el art and your jargyle art 🥹

@junkoandthediamonds - your character studies are beautiful and i'm obsessed with your byler comics, your gifs and your ST x DC crossovers!!! i love your realistic style so So much and if i worked for the duffers i would 1000000% hire you to draw the official comics because i can't get enough of your work 🥰

@livsmessydoodles - fun fact: last year, when HSMTMTS s3 was airing, i remember seeing your rina art throughout the season and immediately fell in love with your style and your interpretation of the characters, and the same exact thing happened when i saw your ST work, and it wasn't until you followed me that i put the pieces together and realized that you were the same person 😅 your style is So gorgeous and your art just makes me so happy, and trust me when i say that i am mentally wallpapering all of your work to the inside of my brain so i can look at it forever❣️

and of course, a very special shoutout to all of the people that i don't know too well but are still such a comfort to have on tumblr: @miwism @yearninginblue @kittykat940 @robinsnance @jesper-faheyss @bylersheart @usergabby @achingly-shy @wheelersboy @wontbyers @stbyers @will80sbyers @watpoetry @frodohaven 💝

+ to all my other mutuals: tumblr wouldn't let me link your profiles because of some ridiculous limit, but please know that i see all of you and i am hugging you through my screen rn. thank you!! 👍🏼

Every month of 2023!

Tagged by @baekhyunnybyun! thank you bex ♡

rules: link your favorite and/or most popular post from each month this year <3 (it’s totally fine to skip months!) and tag some CCs you love!

I want to start by saying that I didn't even go into 2023 thinking that I will be going back to giffing after I stopped in like 2012 or something. Ended up deciding one day that I really miss it and since I wanted to create a space for more Baekhyun content I thought I'd give it another go. My list will be starting from May since I started posting gifs from there <3

May

The second gifset I posted and I didn't even expect it to get that amount of notes because I wasn't sure whether it looked good or not lol

June

my CBX gifset reached over 300+ notes which was the first gifset do that well (i never expect that my sets will go viral or whatever so as long as people enjoy it i'm happy tbh)

July

this cream soda MV gifset got almost 500 notes which is already mind blowing to me tbh. so thank you to everyone who enjoyed and shared <3 this month was really busy since EXO had their comeback i made so many gifsets lol i just wanted to mention some favorites that i really enjoyed making as well: baekhyun in the gown, album photoshoot and one of my favorite kyoongtube videos from 2022 from my favorite moments with baekhyun series i started (and need to get back to i promise i will!)

August

most popular this month was my baegle line set hehe they are so cute TT my personal favorite is this take you home gifset bc no one gets this song like i do (it was my 2nd top song of 2023 in my spotify wrapped)

September

baekhyun in the gym got the most amount of notes in september!

Oktober

when chanyeol included baekhyun in his music video for good enough! that was such a good surprise ♡

November

i didn't have as much time to make content as the end of the year is the busiest time at work. but with 260 notes my seasons greetings set was the most popular

December

the year is coming to an end and this month (like november) was so busy at work i spent almost all my free time resting hence why i didn't post as much as i would've liked my recent baekzreal set got a lot of notes which makes me really happy :) thank you folks!

tagging (no pressure to do this. i just wanted to show some appreciation for y'all): @exo-stentialism, @dazzlingkai, @tipannies, @byunvoyage, @baekhyunnybyun, @exocean, @minsoek, @monwillica, @baekonbaek, @bethereforme, @dokyunqsoo, @pinktaeyeon, @petitbaek, @crazy-form, @jftk, @dinoboos, @jaennie, @suuho, @amaranth, @kokaibop

A year ago today, I posted the last chapter of my Arthur Returns fic, so I feel like celebrating by sharing it with you. Again...

A Little Unsteady by Saltedkiss

"I’m tired,” Merlin said quietly as he stared into the flames. “I feel like an old man, even though I don’t look the part. I can’t even remember how long I’ve been wandering around. The lands around me are changing and I just... don’t.”

He knew Freya was looking at him, but couldn’t bring himself to meet her eyes.

“I’ve lost my magic. I’ve lost - ”

“Arthur.”

Just hearing the name was enough to make his stomach clench. Freya threw another piece of driftwood onto the fire, allowing him some time to gather his thoughts.

“I’ve lost my purpose. Even if he ever returns, what use would I be? I couldn’t even protect him with my magic, how could I ever be enough without?”

-

After fifteen hundred years of waiting for Arthur's return, with little more than his own mind for company, Merlin's memories of his life in Camelot have faded almost entirely.

All this time, Arthur has been watching from behind the veil, desperate to find a way to help Merlin restore his magic. When Arthur finally makes his way back into a now unfamiliar world, he'll soon learn times have changed since he's last set foot in Albion. Retrieving what's been lost might not be as easy as he'd once thought...

Writing this fic has brought me so much joy. It’s my take on what happens after diamond of the day. As it did to so many of us here, that episode left me utterly broken. Anyone who isn’t in the fandom might think I’m exaggerating. You’re reading this post so you know I’m not. So I decided to fix it. To give our boys a happy ending. Even if the road to this happy ending would be covered in capital-A-angst.

A part of the show’s finale kept replaying in my mind. The “I don’t want you to change. I want you to always be you.” Over and over and over again. What if that’s why Merlin lives forever? What if that’s what happened? And I went with it. Started writing. The story starts right after Arthur dies in DOTD, but the first part I wrote was actually the scene in which we see the state Merlin is in after 1500 years of being haunted by images he’d rather forget but never really can. My Merlin in this story is a broken mess, much like I was after the finale. Slowly healing him throughout the story did the same for me.

This story has inspired beautiful gifsets, memes and a moodboard by my dear friends and cheerleaders @camelotsheart @forever-rewatching-merlin and @shana-rosee and one of the story’s scenes has been brought to life by Fynnian on AO3

A Little Unsteady means so much to me, and every single comment is cherished and reread more often than you’d think possible. So this is me, one year later, sharing it with the world. Again.

Every week I think, yep, Big Dragon - favourite show right there. But then the next episode is even better than the last one and here I am, with five gifsets in one evening and ideas for about a dozen more. I'm truly living my best life, even if my version of photoshop is waging a constant war against Windows 11 🥲

But on to this week’s episode review:

This episode is aptly titled Good Old Days, and there’s so many flashbacks and memories and little stories being told. It’s all woven together so well. It even comes with its own red thread of fate.

It all starts with a flashback of a flashback and we learn two things almost immediately: Mangkorn’s really close to his mum and she knows about her son’s crush. Being the amazing mother that she is, she approves.

Her son has his eyes on the Moon of Business Administration, after all (what a catch!).

That his crush goes back to their first year of uni didn’t really shock me because the reveal is pretty much the same as in the book (which has even more of an enemies to lovers vibe - honey, stop punching your future boyfriend just so you can be near him). I’m actually really happy that they kept this part in because I really liked the “plot twist” (hey, it counts as a plot twist if there’s hardly any plot). They even hinted at their whole rivalry only being a thing because Mangkorn kept hanging out at Yai’s Faculty and everyone thought he was there to “steal” girls (when in reality he was there to make heart eyes at Yai). 

Mangkorn fell first AND he fell harder. This is it, this is the whole show.

Well, a big part of it anyway.

And speaking of Big.

I’m definitely not immune to older characters kneeling down to tend to their lover’s shoes/feet. There’s just something almost reverent about it. An unwritten rule that is broken because someone just cares so very deeply.

If only Nine knew about the colour-coding in Big Dragon, then he’d realise that Yai's wearing a red jacket and that’s Mangkorn’s colour. He never stood a chance.

But I loved this repeat of a similar shot in episode 2, when Mangkorn and Yai meet in the hospital:

Nine is even wearing the same kind of shoes that Yai usually prefers. He truly is the embodiment of Yai’s comfort zone - which makes Nine’s metaphor about well-worn, comfortable shoes so fitting. Only that Yai is very direct in saying that he sees Nine as an older brother only.

Which is why I don’t get why he’s kissing Nine back for a full minute in slow motion and several different camera angles, but hey, it’s Big Thanakorn. I don’t blame him (Star Hunter, I beg you, give this man his own show! It’s been 84 years etc).

Maybe this is why Nine refuses to read the room even after Yai tells him to never do it again. 

Enter the yin & yang pendant Yai conveniently loses as a kid while playing with - gasp! - Mangkorn (negl I’m not a fan of the whole “I’ve loved you since we were children” trope but I get why they included it here). 

But the red thread of fate it’s hanging from is even more obvious, and it weaves its way through the entire episode, thereby connecting the past and the present - and binding together Mangkorn and Yai.

Meanwhile, in the present, Mangkorn contemplates doing his Master’s abroad - something he obviously didn’t plan for as long as he thought he had Yai in his life (no, really, was he like “no, I can’t go to New York. There’s this crush I fight every day at his Faculty building. Clearly I can’t go!”).

Oh, and apparently he’s told everyone - and I mean everyone! - about his crush on Yai. He’s told his Mum. He’s told Ajo. He’s told Hong. They’re all rooting for him! At this point I wouldn’t be surprised if he told his professors, too (which will come in handy once he withdraws from the program). This is just so damn adorable.

Too bad Yai won’t have any of it.

This scene is incredible in so many different ways, though.

It’s set in an empty room, one side red, the other a murky green, all strict vertical lines that can’t be crossed. The room is a piece of their past, a (messed up) memory that Yai wants to destroy, while Mangkorn (as part of his job as an intern) wants to preserve it. He clings to “their story” in the same way.

But Yai has a different story to tell. It’s shown through a mirror and it’s really unnerving, the way it makes Yai almost irrecognisable (and this is all Mangkorn gets to see - he doesn’t see how much Yai struggles with his emotions, too).

If only Yai knew how close he is to the truth, though. Mangkorn has wanted to get close to Yai for years, even though it hurt him. And now Yai is telling him to “stop fighting”. Ouch.

It’s the little nod he gives right at the end that absolutely kills me dead. And even before that, the whole scene is so different from every other conversation they’ve had so far. There’s no argument, no back and forth, not even any kind of miscommunication. 

It’s the way Mangkorn is literally fading into the background.

Good thing there’s still the red thread of fate.

And it’s interesting how Mangkorn is shown approaching the cruel mirrored version of Yai to return it to him - like he’s breaking through his barriers.

Yai, through the power of instant flashback, understands immediately.

And I love how later, when he lashes out at his father and his father’s girlfriend, the camera lingers on their reactions even after Yai has already left. He’s literally blind to the hurt he’s causing in his own distress. He’s accusing his family of being cold without his mum, but of course it is. That’s what grief does. That’s what it turns into when it isn’t shared.

Because of course his father has already visited his late wive’s grave first thing in the morning. But what good is that to Yai when he’s never seen his father grieve? No wonder he thinks him cold.

And now it’s Mangkorn’s turn to wear green as he makes up his mind (good thing he’s told everyone about his love life - that certainly makes it easier to seek advice).

While Yai, surrounded by red, is allowed to heal:

And the red thread comes full circle.

And maybe I’ve cried for ten minutes straight after I’watched this scene.

Anyway.

Nine. You’ve talked about this. How is this brotherly? What are you even doing here?

Now it’s Hong’s turn to give advice (good thing Mangkorn has told everyone) and maybe she and Nadear won’t have to elope to the UK after all, like they did in the book (but Star Hunter, consider this: it’d be very cute), because looks like they’re going to tell the dads to get with the times. Oh, yes, and Mangkorn looks very pretty as he finally dares to choose:

Also, finally someone who’s not completely oblivious to their students talking loudly in class. NatureBL is healing.

The green jacket! The soft lighting! The red brick and green leaves! 

And I wonder how many times Mangkorn has daydreamed about this exact scenario🥺

I’ll leave you with this brand new reaction image because you deserve it after reading through all of this. Thank you Jame, thank you Jet, thank you unknown third guy who I’ve never seen before.

hi! hello!! i have been listening to the les mis soundtrack for almost 5 years now, but im just starting to delve into the fandom: im attempting to read the brick (i tried but it's very long), and within the past 2 days i have watched 2/3 of the movies i could find (including ofc the 2012 one which was. interesting.) do you have any advice or things i should know or places i should start with the fandom? even people to follow? im asking you bc multiple in depth posts of yours have shown up in the les mis tag, but please feel free to direct me to someone else or ignore me if that's easier. thank you sm, even just for reading this

Hi, thanks for your ask! I'm always happy to help :D The first thing is that there's currently a "Dracula Daily" style readalong of Les Mis happening, called "Les Mis Letters." It emails out one of the 365 chapters of Les Mis every day for a year, starting January 1st of this year, and is a lot like a big book club (or "brickclub.") It's still not too late to catch up if you binge read a bit! We're currently at the "Who Am I"/Valjean rescuing the person mistaken for him part of the book. :3 It might be a nice way to read the Brick for the first time, since people are going through the book chapter by chapter and discussing it. You can find the Les Mis Letters subscription here:

And the discord server here:

(Although the tag/server are a bit less active now that we're a few months in!)

As for blog recommendations: I already made a Masterpost of some active Les Mis blogs I recommend checking out! Here's that post, there are bunch of great blogs on it:

Two additional blogs I didn't mention in that post--because they've only started becoming more active recently -- are @dolphin1812 who writes great chapter-by-chapter meta for Les Mis Letters, and @pureanonofficial who's been making great gifsets of different Les Mis adaptations inspired by Les Mis Letters! :3

If you want a general overview/map of what the fandom looks like and things you should probably know...I recommend @pilferingapples post here. The big things are that the book is nicknamed "the Brick" (for obvious reasons XD.) So if you see people talking about "the brick" or "Brickclub" or something being "brick-inspired"/"based on the Brick" that's a way saying it's discussion of the book rather than the musical. The Les Mis fando on tumblr/a03 is geeeeeenerally loosely split into the "Old Men fandom" and the "Les Amis Fandom." The Old Men fandom focuses on Valjean and Javert, with lots Valjean/Javert shipping-- the "Les Amis Fandom" focuses on Les Amis, Cosette, Marius, and Eponine, with lots of shipping between everyone but especially between Enjolras/Grantaire. There are also other smaller minifandoms of people really into obscure historical stuff, usually either the history of rebellion or the history of the French prison system /police force, but the "Old Men vs Les Amis" is the biggest divide imo. And in my experience most of the fanfic (and there is a lot of fanfic!) is based on the musical characterization/collective internet fanon rather than the Brick. But there are Some brick-focused fanfics out there! (and they're always my favorites alksdjflksdjf.) There's also a subset of the Les Amis fandom people call the "collective modern AU fanon universe." Basically back in 2012 when the movie came out, lots of people got super into shipping Enjolras and Grantaire, partially because the actor who played Grantaire posted a video of himself singing a love song he'd altered to be about Grantaire/Enjolras. People gradually invented a collective fanon AU of what things would be like if Les Amis lived in the modern day. These modern AUs became so popular that they kind of became the norm, and people assumed your Les Amis fics would be modern AUs even if you didn't tag them that way. There are lots of people who got into Les Mis through the collecive fanon universe more than any adaptation. So what I'm saying is the "Les Amis Modern AU' world is basically an entire Goncharov'ed fanon universe of its own. It has its own tropes, characterizations, headcanons for different characters' appearances/genders, etc etc etc. There have been multiple microbudget webseries and comics based on the collective modern AU universe. It's been around for so long that I think it's normal but I imagine it can be kinda confusing to someone who's new to the fandom XD. And that's pretty much all I can think of! : D But yeah the Les Mis fandom is very fun

COLOURING BEFORE & AFTER TAG:

tagged by the lovely, kick butt and awesome sauce content maker @digitalgirls​ (thank you very much for the tag!) and another lovely mutual but for the life of me my peanut brain forgot who it was so thank you also to you too if you see this!

tagging (only if you want too!): @jinniebit​ @snug-gyu @soonhoonsol @woozification @seokmins @injunnies @chogiwapadada @jeonwonwoo

welp here you go guys! my poopy gif coloring lol. i haven’t giffed much as i just started 2ish years ago now(?) and i am now working a full time job so alas, i don’t have much to really show improvement but i do feel proud with some of my colorings and here are my top 5 (plus bonus two in the read more section hehe) i guess my coloring is more so with making things brighter if that makes sense? keeping things natural but bumping up the vibrance as you can see in certain gifs like the lights one for example. i do feel content with my giffing, granted the quality could be better but that is due to me using ezgif as a converter for making gifs on photopea (i know i can use vs but vs SCARES me like everyone that uses it? you guys are officially badass like gandalf in my books! i bow down to you all lol)

if anyone wants to hear more in depth thoughts of my coloring for each gif plus see the bonus ones that are too tiny to show in a normal gifset, readbelow but if not thank you for checking this out!

gif one: starting off with my proudest one of the bunch, this gif is from my baekhyun countdown series which you can view right here oh my when i say i am proud of this, i am SO proud of this. first of, this short video is pale, REALLY pale. more pale than casper the ghost lkdsalkjda so i struggled with making sure to not overdo the coloring where baekhyun is weirdly colored but making sure it’s no longer so bright ya know? with what i work with, i think i did a good job? it was during this series i started using a gradient map as well for my coloring and ya’ll....use gradient maps lol. i would have used them earlier but i had no clue how to well, use them as silly as that sounds! i found a tutorial on how someone used them and since then i use that. usually use brown to grey to make things neutral but also make sure skinetone is as natural as possible but of course that isn’t always the case, this is something i struggle with as you can probably tell so i am trying my best! overall, a very pretty gif coloring i think! simple but pretty!

gif two: ah yes....my og fav hehe. this was during the 17 days of 17 event that happened last year almost now and this was for of course, scoups day and i am proud of it still! granted, i would do things a tiny bit more differently even though this is just what, a 6ish months difference in giffing from the first gif? regardless, this one is my favorite and all because of one silly thing...the color changed background. as you can tell in the circle, the original was purple with the lightning background and i actually did save my coloring originally with this background still! however, i was playing around with coloring and by accident, just out of curiosity, i changed the color of the background and when i say i was super shocked...i was lol. in a good way of course! don’t ask me why but at the time, i just loved this small change. i thought it was so cool and it made me so excited so i kept it. could i have kept the purple? for sure, it bothered me to this day if i made the right call because a mutual of mine said the purple looked better against scoups skintone which i agree so it eats me to this day lol. (no ill feelings to my mutual! i liked having the feedback because sometimes that initial excitment sometimes isn’t the right call and i like being told the truth!)

gif three: another of my baekhyun gif series which again.....WHY DOES SM OR WHOEVER EDITS THESE VIDEOS, MAKE THINGS SO PALE!?!??! like bro....this one baekhyun IS truly casper the ghost dsaldasl. i managed to save him in this gif set but when i kept doing double takes myself when giffing, i always went “wait, is THIS how it originally looks!?” like i was so surprised with the coloring difference

gif four: featuring my queen, lights. the only non kpop gif lol. she is the reason i got into gif making actually! my first ever gifset is for her mv “prodigal daughter” (which yes you should all take a listen too just saying) so you can thank her for my gif making! this was from her i think 3rd mv, “in my head” which you can check out the gifset here! this is a perfect example of my coloring i think, the making things vibrant but keeping it somewhat natural and for me giffing this without gradient map i feel dang proud lol. it was either this gif or another one of lights but i went with this one instead to showcase i guess my usual coloring ya know?

gif five: and lastly a baekhyun gif once again. this one is originally meant to be with a pink coloring overlay and font as seen in the original gifset but i kept the original coloring because i liked how it turned out overall! i decided to switch things up with my editing by using unsharp mask and instead of using 30% i did 135% and kinda liked the result of it! i do admit, if you are someone like me and are stuck using ezgif, make SURE the file is super hq! while this does look nice, imo it looks better with good video quality when making the gifs as i did this setting for the last 4 gifsets of the baekhyun countdown and for ones like this one, it looks nice but some weren’t very high and you can tell it looks a bit meh. this is i think my current giffing editing and i feel proud of it! this one is very natural in coloring but everything is more “pop” if that makes sense, things are more defined than smooth, the neutral colors look lively, etc. 

BONUS:

you guys thought i would leave out these ones? oh no lol. so these two gfs are from my txt “good boy gone bad” mv and seventeen “hot” mv gifsets i made! i remember seeing this gifset style being HUGE back in late 2017ish up until 2019 if memory is correct by an old school content maker. i saw they had a tutorial on how they did their sets back then so i followed it and made my own for these mv’s and man i loved doing them. not only was the setting up the scenes to use was fun but finding the right font that fit the mv vibe was fun and of course, the coloring. for txt’s, there was alot of greens as you can see here and while i like me green, i wasn’t happy with just how dark and swampy it looked lol. i get it was the aesthetic in general but i wantted it to pop alot and thus the blue/purple tones in the overall gifset which i think looks really beautiful! then for hot, i didn’t plan on the pink coloring lol. i originally wanted to do the usuals, brighten and and make the colors pop out but by moving around to color the orange colors, it turned more pink so i went with it (you can see the difference towards the end of gif of how different the pink and orange are!) still my proudest coloring on both and still am proud for the “hot” as that was originally my top set with notes until somehow baekhyun and his doggo took over xD

hey i wanted to ask! bc i remember you saying how you felt about spuffy but you hadn't rewatched s7 yet. did that affect how you saw them at all? also if you're okay answering, what do you think of seeing red? I've recently begun to think of it as. kind of out of character. like i know spuffy was downward spiraling but it kind of felt like seeing red was "what should we have happen so that things get super bad and spike goes and gets a soul" and not actually something that spike would. have really done? idk. I'm not a spuffy fan but i do think things about that episode

i still havent actually rewatched s7 lol i had been rewatching s6 back in march last year but stopped right before riley showed up again and didnt get around to picking it back up haha. ill probably think about doing a full series rewatch and liveblog after i graduate college (so sometime during the summer) and actually try to get through to the end

that being said i have not actually sat down and rewatched seeing red since the first time i watched the series. so. almost a decade ? at this point ? if thats any indication of how i feel about that episode. it has been a while. its on par with the body in terms of episodes that i never really want to rewatch (though for completely different reasons, obviously) more thoughts below

the way i tend to view seeing red is that of poorly thought through shock value writing. i agree with you in that it feels like a writers decision to have the worst thing happen in order to motivate spike to seek his soul, and not something that feels correct to the character. already by that point you have spike reflecting on their tryst and realizing the way things were was not making either of them truly happy, so it would not take that much prodding for him to realize something had to change. there are other ways to get spike to his breaking point without having to subject buffy to sexual violence. even though their relationship was volatile and played with gray areas of consent, i never got the impression that spike would truly violate buffy's consent. i think writing in an attempted rape affects the way the audience views them on a much deeper level than the writers were expecting. because, a lot of the trauma that buffy endures through the show, while very real to her, has a fantasy element that places a layer of separation from the audience. most people cannot understand the despair of having to send your boyfriend to actual Hell, or the betrayal of being ripped from actual Heaven by your friends. but there are members of the audience who do know the terror and betrayal of sexual violence by their partner. so i think that aspect wasnt taken into serious enough account when deciding to have your main characters love interest and general audience favorite do something so realistically deplorable. thats why i think it was mainly a shock value decision rather than based in any way the character would actually act. not even to mention the fact like. most everyone else in the production hating having to film it and james marsters has said because of SR he will never do a scene like that ever again he hated it that much.

from the refresher ive seen of s7 (from people gifsets and spuffy scenes and meta about spike, the soul, and buffy etc) i wish we had got more of a buildup to a true spuffy reconciliation. there is so much happening in s7. so much that a lot tends to get lost or not as much time focused on in order to get to the very end. i do really think that buffy was incredibly moved and touched by spikes decision to get his soul back. personally i think the choice to get the soul is more impactful than the soul itself, as it demonstrates how remorseful spike is over the AR and his willingness to atone for it without expecting anything in return. and how buffy recognizes that and thats why shes able to forgive him and let him back into her life. but because there are only 22 episodes to fit plot into the reconciliation happens just. a little too quick. i had wished that. idk. it happened over 2ish seasons? so we see spike struggling to reconcile with his soul just a lil bit longer and him settling with it and buffy seeing that struggle while still wanting him around. idk. a lot of my problems with s7 come from pacing issues. while i have my problems with s7 as a whole, i do generally like the spuffy progression in it, even if i wanted it to take a lil longer. in all of buffys past relationships, there are things that happened that make her believe that she is somehow responsible for her partners turning bad, or thinking she is somehow lesser for being with them. but learning that spike got his soul back for her, something she views as essential and good, it shocks her that she could inspire someone to change that much for the betterment of themselves. and because of that she can truly trust him enough to love him completely.

so like long story short i hate that seeing red involved sexual violence and i wish there had been some other way to get to the point of spike realizing he needs to change, but considering the way s7 went i dont think it changes my perspective on their relationship that much. i think spike and buffy are one of the most interesting relationships on the show just by how much they change themselves and each other by being in their lives, and thats why im so invested in them

QOTS Rewatch - 5x04 - La Situacion

This episode isn't quite as hard for me to rewatch as 5x03 is, something about the scale of Teresa's moral failings isn't quite as severe as last episode, but it feels somehow out of place in the rest of the season and it's taken me a year to really figure out how to make sense of Teresa's character journey such that this episode actually makes sense to me. When you read my original debrief after watching live you can see I was clearly like ... wtf was that? What is going on with Teresa and what are they doing with her character? I've made sense of a lot of it now (and kind of processed it ad nauseam in my gifset reblog tags) but this is still in my opinion perhaps the weakest episode of the season.

I don't have a WHOLE lot to add to that original debrief, honestly. I think I captured it all pretty well and I'm still not entirely sure what the queenpin takeaway was. I know I keep saying that it would've made more sense for her journey to just be towards this chillier, stonier, inaccessible white queen rather than going down this snappy, brittle path. It is really hard to see her like this and it feels very out of character for someone who through all the trauma she's been through has always maintained an outer calm. Obviously the trauma has really kept piling on and she has a lot more to lose now than she did five seasons ago (and more people relying on her) so that's how I explain it to myself--her irritability and stress and all that. But it still feels jarring and uncomfortable. And since they never truly address it or have her apologize for it, it feels like a loose end.

I mean look: James was super irritable and gruff and snappy with her, too (I'm thinking about late season 2 especially), and I wish he'd apologized to her for it because she truly didn't deserve it. She wasn't doing anything to him back then that he wasn't doing to her here, which was stepping slightly out of line to challenge him. But James got his full redemption arc. James got all of season 3 to prove to her (and to us) that he loved her. More than anything. And that he'd literally die for her. He never apologized to her for his behavior towards her in late season 2 but it wasn't all that necessary story-wise because it was so obvious that he'd changed. She'd changed him. And he knew that and felt it deeply.

But there wasn't time in this short season for the full reverse arc to take place so we have to fill in a lot of those gaps on our own and assume it's meant to be understood this way. It all does happen eventually, in 5x07 on, and the more I've watched this season the more I do see it that way. It just doesn't really have a lot of time to truly settle that she's had this realization and it's changed her. I mean in some ways Teresa doesn't have to go through a full character transformation because she always was this person of integrity and heart. She's just here on the brink of losing it and then she luckily springs back from the edge.

A few other miscellaneous thoughts that I'm too disorganized to try to capture in a cogent way:

I do appreciate that this season humanizes Teresa to James. That he has to take her off the pedestal he's put her on and see her in all her flawed glory. How weird does it make me that I almost want to write a fic about some big retirement processing sessions where their trust issues flare up bc of the ways they've both treated each other unfairly in the past? Lol. Is that a fic genre?

Can we talk about the FBI plot for just a second and how they introduced it and wrapped it up within the span of a single episode? Whew, whiplash. They could've played that out a little bit longer as she continued expanding.

Speaking of the FBI, I realized on this rewatch that Lucien was way more deeply to blame in so much of the BS this episode than is really clear when you're just watching casually. He's the one that tipped off the FBI to her in the first place. It continues to piss me off how the havoc other people wreak becomes HER problem that SHE has to fix and somehow held accountable for.

And just in general: WHY are women held to SUCH FREAKING DOUBLE STANDARDS AT ALL TIMES???????

Just saying.

i wake up each morning excited to see the gifs you post, the terror gifsets make me feel like I'm getting to contemplate each moment fully. literally the best part of waking up. I'm serious, i sigh over how well you frame/edit them.

(my queue is fucking maxed out rn, i should start having them post come march)

oh 🥺 this is SO lovely, anon. when i first watched the show back in august i WANTED to gif it but i didn't have copies of the episodes and i basically...talked myself out of it? i was worried that since the show aired so many years ago there wouldn't be much interest. i only started giffing the show in late november after a friend of mine shared downloads with me after spotting the book in my apt when we were hanging out (he was randomly ALSO watching the show for the first time). once i got my hands on the episodes i just...started giffing every scene i found interesting.

which was basically almost all of them, clearly 😅

i'm just so glad i was wrong and that there ARE still people enamored by this v beautiful, bleak tv show bc i get so much joy from reading people's thought-provoking, intelligent, (often funny!) tags on my gifs. and it makes me so happy to know that you enjoy the gifs—i hope you continue to enjoy them! i'm almost done giffing e4 (i've got like...30 queued already) and then i'll be onto e5! thank you so much <33

share anonymous opinions you have about me

how'd you get into star wars?

Technically, the first movie I remember watching in theaters is Revenge of the Sith. We only had Star Wars (a new hope, but the vhs was so old that when it came out there was only one Star Wars) at home, so my dad rented the other five from Blockbuster so we could understand what we were about to go see. This didn't make much of an impression on me, except I really liked Episode One, and my sister and I would sometimes pretend to be Jar Jar and Padme or Qui-Gon and Anakin. But there were other shows we liked more, and so Star Wars did not have much impact on my life when I was a kid.

Then Episode Seven came out, and I was enthralled. There was gonna be a stormtrooper Jedi! How cool was that?? Finn and Rey were awesome, and they shared a lightsaber, and they kicked ass!

And then Episode Eight came out, and I hated it so much I swore off Star Wars forever. The prequels haters were right, I thought. Star Wars is stupid as fuck, and they never should have made any after the first one. I still haven't watched episode nine.

But then quarantine happened, and my roommate mentioned that she'd never seen star wars. She barely knew about it. The only thing she knew was Darth Vader. She didn't even know who Luke Skywalker was.

But the Mandalorian looked cool. And we were bored, trapped inside, and we'd already done our single grocery shopping trip of the month, so we had literally nothing to look forward to or fear. I had just graduated, and I had just been laid off because of covid. She had online school, and she'd had the vast majority of her work shifts cut for the same reason.

So since the Mandalorian was a star wars show, we decided to watch the first seven movies.

And I loved them.

I hadn't watched any but episodes 4 and 7 since 2005, and I had almost completely forgotten them. But the movies were so fun, and watching them with my roommate made them more fun. And then, once we'd watched the movies, we got into the Mandalorian, and the first season was so good, so I got to looking at gifsets on tumblr, and then that somehow led me to Projie and Soft Wars---which was my introduction to tcw, because I thought that Soft Wars was based on Episode Two, and I spent approximately fifteen fics being extremely confused but enjoying myself nevertheless. Who is Rex? What is this...Wolffe? Why does everyone have a really stupid name?

And three years later, I've written about a hundred works for this fandom. It's wild. I got through half of tcw08, all of tcw03, all of Rebels and Andor, and way more comics and books than I ever thought I would. And I'm still having fun!

But tl;dr: it's mostly quarantine and baby yoda that got me into it.

Thanks for the ask!

Hey,I just finished watching Strangers from hell and I have SO MANY questions. Also I strongly believes Moonjo didn't die for so many reasons. I also this theory that maybe the entire thing was Jongwoo's novel?Will there be any other season with all the explanations?I really loved this series, so much to the point that I'm sending asks based on it on tumblr lol :P I never did that. Another thing is which episode did Kihyuk talked about Jongwoo to Moonjo? I saw your post on that but can't linkit

Hello~ I hope you're doing well!

First, let me welcome you! It's always nice to meet someone who liked the drama so much that after watching it they still have questions and are creating theories of their own (this is how they get you, and make you stay in this fandom forever XD). I would love to hear your theories about how/why Moonjo survived, by the way, if you ever feel like sharing them (I'm with you in this one! Moonjo is definitely still alive, and the proof is in the drama, for all that look for it to find).

About the idea of the entire thing being Jongwoo's novel, I think it's plausible to imagine that, since Jongwoo could have written it at any point after Eden (a lot of people believe that it's the story he's writing in his laptop at the end of episode 10). Jongwoo could be manipulating the narrative and, naturally, the audience, since he's unreliable (*cough* a liar *cough*).

I don't know about explanations, but, the channel that produced the drama, OCN, announced that there was another season (a prequel) and a movie in their plans (**however, it has been almost a year without any news from them, so we're starting to think of it as a dream/collective hallucination we had once).

To be frank, the sole reason my blog was created in the first place was because I had many thoughts about Strangers From Hell, that I just couldn't keep to myself anymore, so I understand on a personal level what is coming here to do things you never did before watching this drama (actually, the first time I ever received an ask was because of it! I didn't even know I needed to enable the option to receive them in the blogs I had in the past 😅 I learned and did a lot by being part of this fandom. The people here are really nice and have many interesting ideas; I'm certain you'll have a good time if you stick around!).

About Kihyuk talking to Moonjo about Jongwoo... That never happened. I was actually not sure about what you could be referring to, until I remembered the AU I made—not part of canon, just me playing with what ifs and alternative realities. I signalled it in the caption of the gifset, but I understand it could have caused a misunderstanding. I'm sorry that it happened (it would be cool if it was true, though, wouldn't it? ☺).

Well, now... If you have any more questions, wants to ramble about something, or need anything, anything at all, you know where to find me! Know that I'm thrilled to receive you in the family and will fully support you <3

See ya! o/

I really wish I could go back and experience Avatar with fresh eyes. But I’m also glad I was exposed to it when it first aired.

I vaguely remember some advertising for it’s premiere and, at the time, I know I was in deep with my Kingdom Hearts hyperfixation. The first Avatar episode I saw was the day after prom in my Junior year when a girl in the friend group I was in turned on a rerun in April or May 2005. For some reason my mind is convinced the episode was Cave of Two Lovers, but it hadn’t aired yet. I’m not surprised I can’t remember the episode because at the time I was eyeballs deep in heavy OCD symptoms and kind of in the early stages of a huge mental breakdown haha. I’d had visible OCD symptoms for years but had no idea I had it; then barely a month later I was hospitalized and diagnosed because of my intrusive thoughts and ruminations. It kinda sucked lmao.

Over the next couple of years I was exposed to Avatar mostly because of my Uncle. He adored the series. He was an avid cartoon fan who loved art and comics and drawing and had the bones of one of his own comics but became ill and passed away before he could finish it. I appreciated Avatar for what it was, but didn’t really have the heart to get invested. There was a point that I did make an oc and drew some art and wrote a bit but it lasted like maybe 2 weeks tops. 2005-late 2007 was a minefield period of time that was mixed with me trying to reconfigure my whole personality (right around the time I turned 18 so THAT was good timing) and trying to enjoy the things I loved before my breakdown. I was desperate to be who I was before everything happened.

However, I did keep up with the series after moving to another state and the third season began airing. I remember watching Day of Black Sun and then the finale. I just kept up with it out of interest. Then years went by and I finally started moving forward. I found new interests that helped me become creative again, all while making the painful realization that my mental health was a permanent thing after believing I had ‘conquered’ my OCD. I also unknowingly had ADHD, which I was finally diagnosed with this year, which exacerbates my OCD and intrusive thoughts and ruminating.

Years went by, I went through college, I’ve had so many different jobs, I paid off my student loans late 2020 and then in 2021 my mental health got so bad again I finally sought out therapy for the first time in ten years. I started taking medicine for depression and mood swings. Almost all I was doing was working. I lived with my parents, which wasn’t a bad thing; but the strict schedule and my night shift meant I had little chances of doing much, and I gained weight from stress eating for dopamine.

Then almost a year ago I moved out for the first time; hence my DBZ hyperfixation. I wanted some nostalgia, and I’d had a 2 year period where that series was my bread and butter in 2002-2004. However, I moved again earlier this year, and at first it was all about adjustment; but I was beginning to realize I just didn’t do anything. I still have that issue. But in trying to wonder what it was exactly that I wanted or didn’t want, I started to realize if I’m going to live, I may as well start seeking out things to do.

I was tired of just existing, so I finally set up violin lessons, and I’ve been attending them weekly (save missing one here or there) since April. I’ve learned what I have the power to do, even if I often lack the motivation and drive. I’m becoming more and more content, even if there are the off-times when things are iffy.

I was absolutely not expecting my re-introduction to Avatar to be a gifset of Iroh threatening Zhao in the Spirit Oasis; a scene I was unfamiliar with. I think I had watched the series on Netflix some years ago, but again, I’ve lacked the commitment to it. The punch of that scene with a character I had associated with benevolence after being lukewarm towards the series intrigued me, and I fell down the rabbit hole lol

And I’ve realized that, after getting older, the show is actually a lot more meaningful; and after stumbling upon a gifset of Iroh’s quote ‘Life happens wherever you are, whether you make it or not’; that hit me. That was exactly what I’d started trying to live by over the past couple of months. Zuko’s strive to figure out who he wants to be hits home too, as I often struggle, even at 34, with what I want or who I want to be. (granted, I need to find a new therapist but that’s another story lmao)

After seeing all this merch pop up and be like ‘oh yeah Avatar that’s a good show’ and being disconnected, I now adore it. I know the bones of it but I’m still learning all of the smaller details and worldbuilding and lore. I’m a newbie but at the same time I know what it is and watched the premieres of The Awakening, The Day of Black Sun, and Sozin’s Comet.

I’ve always appreciated the series for it’s creativity and how it avoided talking down to it’s audience (yeah it had kid moments but it was a Nickelodeon show). And even as an adult so many messages ring true. I definitely  put it on the same page as Gargoyles (because 1. I’m biased and 2. both are intricately woven stories that treat it’s audience as adults; I wish Gargoyles had gotten the same closure Avatar did, but for what it is it’s still an amazing show and I’ll always adore it and I’m so glad a show like Avatar did get it’s story completed for the most part)

And yet it’s Iroh’s line ‘whatever you do to that spirit, I’ll unleash on you tenfold’ is the one that kind of brings tears to my eyes; because it rings of conviction and fortitude to do the right thing, and is what brought me back to a little piece of fandom that, even if I already know all of the twists and turns and spoilers, was there for me to pick back up on when I needed it and to help me continue to move forward.

(pt 1) "Atleast we can suffer together!" lol true! Gosh, that line (and tbh that whole scene with Sergio and Martín murders me of FEELS)... it's just so angsty cause it's not even the fact Andrés died, but he was also sick and Sergio knew that and he still never truly considered the possibility of his brother dying :(

BTW, what headcanon for the hermanos backstory do you subscribe to? I'm not sure when you first started the show, but I watched the show back when s3 was just released and in those days everyone subbed to the hc that they were half brothers, and there was this interview where Alvaro mentioned even more headcanons abt the bros (they shared a father, who abandoned Andrés for Sergio & his mom, then after he died Andrés appears on the scene and tells Sergio he is his brother, took care of him for medical treatment etc)... of course, 2 years later s5 seemingly retconned all that and just made them normal full(?) brothers growing up in the same household with both parents which I didn't appreciate very much lol. Anyway, just asking you that because some of my thoughts about the hermanos are influenced by my thoughts about their childhood - especially if Andrés raised Sergio as a kid, it makes everything so much more WORSE and heartbreaking cause of course he'd have grown up thinking his older brother is invincible almost, right? Interested to know what you think!!

(pt 2) Yeah all but one of my exams are done with... meh I've been pretty miserable but thank you for all your kind wishes! You're so right, if Andrés just mentioning Sergio makes us feel things, I can't even imagine what a whole scene with them together again would do!! I miss Sergio too 🥲 Once again, feel free to take your time and wait for the inspo, I actually came across an angsty quote that might fit the Scene that shall not be Named and since you love pain, I will tell you. "I wanted to fall down right there but I knew you wouldn't catch me because you're dead." - Richard Siken. Don't think about how as Andrés fell, Sergio was also falling in Helsinki's arms. (Also please don't feel like I'm forcing you to make a gifset with the quote or anything, I'm sorry if it comes across that way I just wanted to share for the #hermanos angst) I have no words for your next para but just. yes. I agree with everything you said. I will never get over the fact he literally tried to run back into the (idk how many metres long) tunnel himself despite knowing the police were on the other side and it would almost definitely lead to capture but Sergio was willing to risk all that just to get his brother to safety :( (pt 3) "When they're together, they're a big brother and a little brother" I knowww 🥺🥺 it makes me so SOFT. I'm with Andrés, how can you possibly eat breakfast when the world's most precious hermanito is not there yet? That scene when he wakes up Sergio is so sweet, Sergio looks so adorable and just the fond amusement Andrés has when he picks up the book "did you stay up late studying again" and how gentle he is when waking him up, Sergio also does not startle in the slightest, in that small moment you can see how familiar they are, how much they both love and trust each other, your honour I LOVE THEM!! Ah the Toledo house always makes me think how they spent those 5 months pretending to be strangers, I mean you can't tell me that Sergio was also not taking every excuse he can to spend more time with his brother (it's DEFINITELY to discuss important plans with the heist Captain!) but I like to imagine Sergio also took care of Andrés in secret, helping him with the meds and stuff... despite everything, Andrés did have a clock running out and they both knew it :( On another sidenote, I've been wanting to write a oneshot of the bros in Toledo since like 2020 but I never got around to it LOL so thank you once again for letting me ramble abt the heist brothers to you Oh god yes, those lyrics truly come straight for the heart and make Sergio's grief infinitely worse! Awww I'm glad you enjoy my thoughts (and I hope you haven't regretted your invitation yet) Haha, you should probably put this one under a cut too, how do these things always get so long??? Truly the hermanos live rent free in my head... but you're right it's great the Range of thoughts they give us from sheer tragedy to happy little childhood memories asdfjsk. YES IT'S THE CUTEST EVER and Alvaro plays it so well :') Comfort scene of all time to me <3 No, thank you for your patience and just being so lovely!! As always, it gives me so much serotonin to talk with you abt the heist bros ❤ Have a great day/week whenever you see this!! (also I hope you got all 3 parts, my wifi is being so weird rn 😭 I can't imagine how confusing it would be to get only 1 half or someth, anyway. pls ask me to resend if tumblr did in fact disappear an ask)

So true (that scene really leaves me on the floor suffering!!)... he knew and yet... at the very least he was convinced they were going to have time after the heist (the scene where he's giving instructions to the other band members about where they'll live etc. always gets me because he was supposed to go somewhere with Andrés...)

About the hermanos' childhood, I feel like I'm an outlier there 😅 because I learned of that headcanon later, I don't remember exactly when, for sure after watching season 3, and season 3 gave me the impression they were full brothers, because I think we get scenes where Andrés refers to their mother and to their father in a way that made me go, okay, so they share both parents. You know, the scene where he tells Sergio he's got mom's disease and the scene where he asks him where did dad go wrong when he robbed the bank... So when after that I saw that interview I didn't really embrace (? I don't know how to say that lol) the half-brothers headcanon because the show had already given me another impression. On the other hand, I immediately accepted the idea of Andrés bringing Sergio to Russia where he got the cures he needed (also because lol that's a point they never clarified in the show, right? How he ended up healing). That said, I really like the potential and implications of the half-brothers headcanon too... like, for example, as you said, Andrés basically raising Sergio. I think you can kinda work that into the full-brothers scenario as well, though maybe not quite at the same level, because if their parents already had trouble with medical expenses for Sergio when they both were there, once their mother was alone I imagine she really had to bury herself into work, which left Andrés in a position to really have to take care of Sergio... also as I mentioned I believe he was the one who found that hospital in Russia where Sergio could be cured, and found a (probably not very legal) way to take him there and so on... and at this point I like to play with both options and confront them and see like, okay, in half-brothers scenario Andrés probably resented their mother for abandoning him while in full-brothers scenario he ended up resenting her because she couldn't take proper care of them and (probably especially) because she failed to come up with a way to save Sergio's life, Andrés had to take matters into his own hands. And I think it's super interesting that he doesn't end up resenting Sergio (which I think he could have easily done in both scenarios! Like, in half-brothers scenario because he was abandoned for him, and in full-brothers scenario I have to imagine his unhealthy little brother received a lot more attentions!) One thing I think we get more intensely in the half-brothers scenario is that taking care of Sergio is really a Choice, like he really didn't have to and still!

Oh, and regardless of scenarios, I really love the idea of Andrés being the one who ultimately saved Sergio's life, it's possible that at some point doctors in their hometown were a bit resigned about him not making it but Andrés was like NO. And he did save him! I bet he's ferociously proud of that, and maybe it's another think that makes him feel especially protective of his hermanito (and makes Sergio feel like Andrés can do ANYTHING).

I see, at least you're almost done... ugh, I'm so sorry, I get it... I hope once you get rid of that last one too you'll feel a bit better... Gosh, I would probably never ever stop screaming if we get a new hermanos scene! And HOLY HELL, that quote fits the whole thing so well, I feel sick! Literally literally Sergio falling but he's not falling in his brother's arms, his brother isn't there anymore... no, absolutely, don't worry, it goes without saying that I appreciate the #hermanos angst, and suggestions about quotes that could fit them are always welcomed (I mean, as of right now I wouldn't know how to make a gifset with it but maybe by turning it over and over in my head I'll get an idea...)!! Also, I actually got inspiration for a gifset about them, finally!!! from another Richard Siken's quote, no less (he was really writing about them lmao), like I'm still not completely sure of which scenes to use, but I do have an idea, I hope it'll work :D

Oh god that's true. Oh man he really tried to run into that tunnel, no matter how crazy that was... I cry!!

It's trueee, that scene where Andrés wakes Sergio up OVERFLOWS with familiarity, it's so clear it's not the first time he had to wake his little brother up after he stayed up late to study and had to pick up some book Sergio left lying around... he's so fondly amused!! Please and now I'm smiling so much at the idea of Sergio coming up with Very Important Topics He Needs to Discuss with The Heist Captain... and I wonder how many times they were the last ones left in a room (a mere coincidence, of course!)... and yeah, I bet Sergio also played the Finding Many Small Ways To Take Care Of You game, this is making me emotional! Hehe I'm happy I gave you the chance to talk about these things, if you ever get around to write that please let me know (if you want to of course)

I definitely don't regret my invitation, when I saw your new messages I was like yessss! Oh right, at this point the ability to put things under a cut is my friend sjsjsjsk but I feel you, I can't get them out of my head!!

Don't mention it!! Talking with you about the hermanos is such a serotonine boost, and honestly I very much needed that, the last few weeks have been pretty tiring! Thank you, I hope you do too, despite that accursed exam! Please take care! (Also as you can see all three parts made it safely to my inbox, thankfully!)

2023 in review 🏳‍🌈

Tagged by the lovely @btwinlines (here) and @chickenstrangers (here) ✨ Thank you 🙏

>> Post your most popular and/or favorite edit/gifset/analysis for each month (it’s okay to skip months!)

This took a while to assemble because I first needed to track down all my original posts which are strewn across several personal tags because I didn't know at the time I established them that I'd be shitposting, getting back into giffing?? etc.

January-June

Still lurking but I took to commenting on Thai BLs on YT a lot. The thoughts needed to go somewhere but I wasn't back on tumblr yet cause I'd been mostly using it for Kpop for several years at that point. My first Thai QL related reblogs are from January 2023 though.

Fun fact: I watched Theory of Love in 2019 after stumbling across OffGun and promptly watching their entire back catalogue lol I even watched a good portion of 3 Will Be Free as it aired but fell off of Thai series entirely and I don't recall why! My only guess is that I was too into Kpop and learning Korean, nerdy proof from vocational training below lol I got back into BL in late summer 2022 via Semantic Error and from there I fell quickly!

July

popular: I only posted twice that month! Be My Favorite was one of the reasons I un-lurked and this breakdown of the pronoun talk in ep. 10 was me deciding to start sharing my vibrating-in-my-seat-about-Thai-language energy lol

honorable mentions: Wedding Plan's YiwaMarine were the original reason I stopped lurking because I wanted to make some noise for Thai GL and for this show - hence this ramble of a post was created!

August

popular: this Only Friends meme? shitpost? about Cheum being a textbook U-Haul lesbian

honorable mention: this Wedding Plan parallel edit of YiwaMarine / LomNuea / Yiwa&Lom <3 and this post about the food, tongue twister, language in Hidden Agenda ep. 5 because it exemplifies how/what I learn from Thai series and because it's the third show I ever posted about

September

popular: an analysis of how the two main couples or two sets of best friends in Naughty Babe (and Cutie Pie) talk to each other

honorable mention: this rant about how the Korean remake of Why R U?, specifically their Fighter, Tutor and Hwa adaptation, frustrated me because it makes no sense if you don't already know the Thai original and this Naughty Babe post about pronouns and names between the two families

October

popular: unsurprisingly it's this Only Friends SandRay post aka Phi Bug and Nong Rabbit

honorable mention: this was the month I finally watched La Pluie so there's a few posts where I'm basically talking to myself lol about some subbing choices, among other things. This was also when GMMTV's press con for the upcoming year happened and I got too interested in all the wordplay in the Only Boo! trailer.

November

popular: I still haven't started watching Cooking Crush (too bitter about the uncut situation tbh) but I did write up an explanation of a pun in ep. 1. And because this is the month that I almost exclusively posted about Thai GL - this Love Senior ep. 1 post with various language observations.

honorable mention: This was also the month I suddenly got back into gifmaking, something I had dabbled in throughout several past fandoms (don't- just- don't go looking lmao). Basically no one's watching Wednesday Club? -> a gifset of May as played by Piploy. There's barely a ZeeNuNew fandom to speak of on tumblr? -> a badly thought out ZNN gifset lmao. The video in question doesn't have English subs? -> Love Senior cast and director shenanigans giffed! I haven't made a single gif since btw djsjdhsj

December

popular: Pronoun changes, my beloved! Because of course the switch to พี่/น้อง /phi, nong/ in ep. 5 would get me to start rambling posting about Last Twilight lol

honorable mention: I expanded on that when I went back through ep. 1-6 to examine the entire evolution of how MorkDay speak to each other. Also wanna mention this very random post about a meme and Thai song (that I've played endlessly) and that time I hijacked @zimmbzon's doc Jim post to reply to their tags :D

A very busy year with lots of shows watched, lots of new acquaintances made on here, and a steadily growing understanding of Thai! If the utter devastation I seem to already have caused with that Rung/rainbow Last Twilight post from the other day is any indication of the year ahead, then it sure is gonna be a fun one lmao

I'm honestly not sure who has been tagged yet and who even wants to do this but some no-pressure tags: @ueasking @thegalwhorants @pharawee and, of course, if you read this and wanna play the tag too, feel free to tag me! If any mutuals have already done this, please point me towards your posts too~

AFTERTHOUGHTS - ROUNDUP ROUND 7

September 2023

Happy October! I'm a little late here because I had to take a health break from being online for a few days. But I'm back now! It's getting colder outside, and Halloween (my favorite holiday!) is right around the corner!

Also... hello new followers! This blog has basically been a ghost town since I started it but unexpectedly, some gifsets I made last month REALLY took off! So now I've got almost 50 followers. Usually I wouldn't do so much preamble on a roundup post but I feel the need to explain myself a little bit. This is what this blog is mostly for, posting my thoughts and opinions on games I played recently. To keep them neatly organized and also not clogging up everyone's feeds. I understand this is NOT what most of you followed for, so feel free to unfollow if you like. If not, I hope you enjoy what I have to say!

As with EVERYTHING I share here, these are not reviews. This is just word vomit from me sharing my thoughts on games. Nothing I say should be taken as fact, and if anything I talk about is interesting to you, you should absolutely play it and form your own opinion!

That's that on that, let's tackle the September games!

Rayman Origins (November 15, 2011) - PS3

Hey! Look! I beat my first Rayman game! Similarly to BB, I actually got this game years ago, but never managed to beat it at the time. But with the Rayman Mario + Rabbids DLC out (which I still haven't bought lol BUT I WANT TO REAL BAD!) I figured it was time to finally take the plunge into this series! And I LOVED it! I was having such a killer time with it! Super gorgeous visuals, AMAZING music (I love how goofy it is the lum song was stuck in my head forever afterwards lol), genuinely funny plot, very fun gameplay, the works. But... Partway through the game, suddenly the whole plot changes and you're no longer dealing with demons? And then you have to go through all the worlds a second time and fight a final boss that has nothing to do with the story? Only to then afterwards be told to go through AGAIN and collect almost all the electoons so you can fight the ACTUAL final boss in a super long, super brutal level that's just a long string of memorization. It felt like the second half of the game was made by a different team, it just didn't feel nearly as good and it kinda killed the game for me in the end. I did enjoy the first half a lot though, so I will absolutely check out some of the 3D Rayman games soon, but I might steer clear of Legends atm.

One thing I have to say though: dude the Nymphs are SO hot! Like, they are SO fine it's actually insane. A lot of games will make horny character designs and flaunt them constantly and they're just okay. But no, Rayman Origins earned it. I'm so thirsty for them, that character designer deserves a raise. ANYWAY-

Mortal Kombat 11 (April 23, 2019) - Xbox One

And here we go with my first gamepass game of the month lol. My sister was very kind and gave me a month for my birthday, and one of the first things I beat was a simple arcade run of MK11! MK is a series I actually have an odd amount of history with, but it's also a series I just never really got into. But I did find myself watching the 11 story mode, and I'll try it out whenever it comes into my path. So, here we are. I played as Scorpion, who tends to be my favorite especially whenever Reptile isn't available, and just did a run of the Arcade ladder. I had a good time with it! I'm always impressed with how simple it is despite how edgy it is. And I think being able to make your own custom movesets is super cool (mine mostly just consisted of his classic moves cause they're all I know lol.) Game looks great, has some really gorgeous stages, again, considering how edgy it is, and I thought the final boss was really neat. My only complaints come from the lootbox stuff, I know you can unlock everything for free but I really hate when games put all the customization options behind random chance rather than just putting it in a shop where I can pick and choose what I want. Injustice 2 did the same thing, but thankfully in MK it looks like you don't have to pay for anything. Neat time other than that though.

Gyromite (August 13, 1985) - NES

Next up is a game I didn't technically "beat" since it has like 99 levels. But I did play through the first few levels out of curiosity and I actually enjoyed it so much I wanted to give it a shout out! Gyromite is actually one of the NES games made to work with ROB from Super Smash Bros. Brawl (they made the NES after that game came out). And I wanted to see if I could emulate ROB... I could not. But I already had Gyromite downloaded so I decided to play it myself, and I gotta say. I think it's more fun by yourself with 2 controllers! You play as a scientist trying to get all the bombs without getting touched, and you use the second controller to lift and raise gates to help bridge gaps or stop enemies. Also, you can collect carrots to distract enemies. It's really basic but it's actually a SUPER fun game that I think deserves more love! If you haven't tried it, I do think it's a neat little experience that really deserves to be on NSO.

Dracula X (July 21, 1995) - SNES

Hey, my second Castlevania game! And uh... man idk I did not like this nearly as much as Super Castlevania 4 lol. Idk what the consensus on this is, I know fans consider it to be a non canon stripped down version of a much better game. But I figured I could play this in a night, and I was right! Also, I'm no good at Metroidvanias so I figured I'd play the platformer. And yeah, this game kinda sucks. Feels super clunky to play, has some bizarre enemy placements that make the game almost impossible at some scenes. And generally, outside of some nice sprites and the always BANGING Castlevania music, it's just kinda boring. The only real praise I can sing (outside of the super good music) is that the Wolfman totally kicks ass! He was so cool and genuinely the best boss fight in the game. So while I wasn't really into it, I know that if I had played the REAL game this was based on, it would probably have been a lot better.

Venba (July 31, 2023) - PC

Next up is another Gamepass game! I wanted to play Venba since I first saw it because it just looked really nice and cute! And that's exactly how I'd describe it now that I've played it! It's a very nice story about an immigrant mother, her relationship with her husband, her child, and the food she cooks. And so each level consists of you trying to cook a meal with your mother's cookbook, which has become really messed up over the years. Each level is a puzzle where you try to figure out the right way to cook, and see how it brings the family together. I really had a great time with it! These simple and cute games are always a blast to play and a nice breath of fresh air. And it actually made me pretty emotional. Obviously it's not the same experience at all cause I'm white but it did seriously make me think about my relationship with my mother who also came to America for similar reasons. The game actually almost made me cry lol, but more importantly, it made me hungry! I might have to try cooking some stuff they showed in it! Biriyani in particular really caught my interest as something that just looks CRAZY tasty. And hey, maybe I'll ask my mom to help me make some Romanian food too haha.

Outside of that, the music is really nice, I think most of it is licensed? Or at least is lyrical music performed for the game and it's great. And I particularly loved the art style, which no outlines and a more spraypaint looking brush. It's incredibly unique looking! And Venba herself is SO cute, she's so fine. I love her. I want her to be happy. If you're looking for a nice, short game to play through for an easy and relaxed experience, I can't recommend Venba enough!

Metroid: Zero Mission (February 9, 2004) - Gameboy Advance

Remember when I said I didn't like Metroidvanias a game or two ago? Well, sometimes you gotta step out of your comfort zone. I've only beaten 2 games in the genre before, Ori and Radical Rescue. Ori was good and RR was... neat. But I've never beaten a single metroid in my life until now! I chose Zero Mission for a few reasons, but two big ones are that it's a remake of the first game. And the second is that I actually did play and enjoy this one in the past. But clearly I did not get very far cause I didn't remember SHIT lmao. I planned on playing this side by side with a walkthrough, but I'll admit I actually had a faster and way more fun time just genuinely using the maps the game gave me and just running around. It's fun to figure it out and get upgrades and be like "OH I can do that thing now!" it's like a collectathon lol. The music is nice, the sprites are KILLER (I'm a huge GBA sucker after all).

But of particular interest. Dude. Oh my god. The Zero Suit scene. Holy shit. It's so scary! I was seriously screaming during it! It does such a good job of building tension and just making the situation so scary and dire, and then jump scaring you when the space pirates actually go through doors and climb through vents. It was seriously so bone chilling. But then getting the full power suit and running back through the ship and seeing all the space pirates cower in fear at your might, even hiding in the places you had to hide before? Genuinely brilliant. It was so exhilarating and got such a good reaction out of me. I absolutely ADORED this game! Idk if I'll play many more Metroidvanias past this but damn am I glad I gave this one a go!

Punch-Out!! (May 18, 2009) - Wii

And last, and least! Punch-Out!! Another game series I've never beaten any games in before! I could have played the NES one which probably would've been shorter, but again for a few reasons I decided on the Wii one. It's the newest, seems to be the most popular(?), and also was new when I was a lot younger so I have some nostalgia for when it was coming out. So I played it and uh... Yeah I really did not enjoy this game at all. I know this series is SUPER beloved with tons of fans but I just do not get the appeal. Tons of memorization, the characters are all kinda ugly and also yeah it's kinda racist, boring gameplay. Idk I just was not really into it. Full disclosure, it is a bit of a skill issue. I could not beat Soda Popinsky so I had to use an infinite Star Punch cheat lol. Everyone else I beat legit or at least did the first round and then cheated (I only did this for the characters after Soda, when I stopped caring). But not, him I could not do.

It's not all doom and gloom though. I do think the music is also pretty good in it. And I do have to give the game some props, everyone who comes from another region does legit speak their native language I believe. Which fucking rules actually. And I guess it gave us Little Mac in Smash Bros. Who is fun. But idk, yeah I just wasn't really into this. Oh well, different strokes for different folks. At least I played it!