#this is pretty much how their friendship starts!
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a promise of forever
– tales of the voracity pathstrider
✎𓂃 falling in love; promising an eternity in return. aventurine's real name, ~3k word vomit
aventurine has realized by now that he might just be in love with you.
okay, love is a strong word, let’s take a few steps back.
he isn’t too sure if he’s ready to make that commitment yet, so… at least, he wants you to always be with him. to stay by his side.
he has to make the first move because you would never
he’s terrified!! he doesn’t want to be the first one to offer his heart!!
but if he doesn’t you’d be perfectly content maintaining whatever you have right now
like… boss and assistant? friends? best friends? roommates? lovers? not yet?
aeons he hated how passive you are
it’s so damn obvious that you liked him back to a certain degree
but why aren’t you trying to hold onto him? why aren’t you trying to take up more of his life like he’s doing with you?
he wants your smiles all to himself; wants your hidden softness to only be directed at him; wants your affection for himself, all of you, including your leviathans
he loves, loves how you’ve opened up to him over time
you’ve gone from a ice cold slab of stone to a wall he trusts enough to rant at, then the highlight of his life that he doesn’t want to let go of
the way you would get upset whenever he tries to do something dangerous, even if you and he both know he’d come out fine
the way you would pick up the phone regardless of when or why he’s calling, even if you’re off duty and annoyed at him ringing you at 2am
the way you would, without considering his feelings, cringe and back away when he accidentally brings you food you hate, but ultimately feed it to your scarf because you don’t want to waste it
he loves them all. your reactions, your expressions, everything
especially when he’s probably the only one to see so much of you all the time
he wants to keep hearing you talk about yourself, keep learning more about you, even the parts of you that no one’s ever known before
he didn’t want to tell you all of that, yet he wants you to know
except you’ve made it very clear with your personality that if he doesn’t tell you, you won’t pry
and, like, you can’t read minds. neither can he.
so you’ve essentially forced him into confessing :(
if he wants your friendship (and more), he has to be the one who asks
aventurine remembers how cold you were at the beginning, so much so that he briefly wondered if working under him was amount to torture for you as it was for a few of his previous secretaries.
you never talked more than absolutely necessary, you've always had that terrifying glare, and couple these things with the fact that he rarely saw your face? yeah, you didn’t look like you wanted to be there.
he tried to transfer you elsewhere. under topaz, maybe, or even jade, or even some other department but you've never replied.
but you've replied to his texts before and after that?
you've just flat out ignored the transfer offer?
does this mean you don't want to be transferred?
that's probably when his fascination with you started
you, who's so detached and seems to dislike him, wanting to stay as his secretary?
he tried to ask you about it once, but all he got was “there's still a year before my contract expires”
which, well, yes, fair enough
but you should also know that if he's the one bringing it up, you won’t be getting into trouble for breaking the contract
he drops it, though, because he knows that there might be certain things you don't want to tell him
or perhaps you don't understand
he feels like you're very bad with emotions and expressing your thoughts
you are, honestly
it’s a different story with the permanent offer he made you a while ago, though
“are you sure?” you asked, with rare anticipation in your eyes
he chuckles, “absolutely.”
you try to hide your joy, but the speed at which you signed the paper is telltale enough
he’s also promoted you from secretary to assistant
even though you’re pretty much his assistant already
you don’t really know how to feel about that part
does this mean you’ll get even busier? not really? will you still be staring at contracts at 3am?
then comes aventurine’s offer for you to move in with him.
you’ve managed to finally notice that the dynamic between you and your boss resembles that of typical lovers in the media, but what do you know? one, aventurine is probably unused to someone else’s company so he’s compensating for it, and two, it’s not like you’re versed enough in mortal sentiments to make an accurate judgement.
he cuddles up to you in his sleep
he’ll smack your face accidentally when he wakes up and stretches
“this is the twenty-third time you’ve done this.” your scarf morphs into half a faceless snake and push his hand back down
why the hell have you been keeping count
you’ve mostly lined your morning routine up with his
efficiency, you tell yourself, it’ll be easier to keep yourselves on schedule
which means you find yourself with him at the breakfast table more often than not
he’s eating normally, while you…
you have a leviathan chewing on the entire plate, and yes that includes the ceramic
what about you? you’re preparing presentations and drafting contracts, of course!
or sometimes fighting for your life in corporate emails :/
is starting the day together really still simply “efficiency” at this point?
you’re starting to think you’re lying to yourself as the days go by
maybe you’ve been living amongst mortals for too long
because you find him so precious that you want to hold him dearly and give him everything
he’s so scared of being vulnerable, but he’s willing to lower his guard around you
what is this foreign feeling? what’s with this odd desire to protect? to hoard?
like how dragons hoard treasure, or how crows hoard shiny things
has anyone told you you’re terrible at emotions?
you’re terrible at emotions
you’ve memorized every little thing he likes and every little habit he has
and he noticed! of course he noticed!
are you absolutely sure you don’t like him even a little bit?
are you absolutely sure you have nothing to say to him?
must he make the first move when you’re so blatantly obvious?
he really, really, hates you (lovingly) for this
aventurine eventually comes to terms with it. if he wants you, officially, he’ll have to bare his innermost thoughts first.
there’s a period of distancing, and a period of overwhelming anxiety and overthinking all on his own. but even then you didn’t pull away from him, no; you were patient. you’ve asked, then left him alone when he turned his head away, then you’ve kept it professional. you didn’t question him again after, either.
it stung a little when you acted all formal with him, but it’s your little actions in-between that convinced him to finally come out and say it. getting him coffee the way he likes it, letting him find comfort in your presence at night even if he’s suddenly closed himself off, ordering his favorite takeout when it’s a slow day, covering his openings when you find yourselves locked in combat… you’ve always been looking after him, haven’t you?
finally, finally, aventurine decides to confess.
considering how little he knows about you, he (surprisingly) isn’t too worried about giving you his heart
well, of course there is the tiniest amount of doubt and fear
but mostly he thinks you wouldn’t betray his trust. mostly.
you’re a walking green flag, after all
maybe with the exception of when you’re left alone with monsters
but the way you treat him? green flag. massive green flag.
even after he’s told you a little bit about his past, you haven’t looked down on him at all
he doesn’t think you’ve ever looked down on him
though, he thought you thought him despicable when you first met because of the way you looked at him
not unreasonable with the stereotypes against his people and all
but you’ve proven his assumption wrong on your first day
you were totally cooperative and really… well, not nice, but not hard to work with, either
despite your unresponsiveness, you’ve kept everything he said in mind
that’s not how one behaves around someone they find distasteful
and after spending so much time with you, he realized that’s just how your stare is
you sort of… look down on everyone without meaning to
you have no idea how relieved he was when he could finally be certain that you’ve never disliked him
also! he can discern between your stares now
your resting neutral stare, your happy stare, your disgusted stare, they’d look the same to the average person, but not to him anymore
(he was super happy when he realized he’s got it all down)
he’s learned to read you because you’re so reserved and detached all the time
oh how he wished you’d tell him more about yourself
before anyone asks, he did try to dig up your past
imagine his surprise when he found nothing, like, literally nothing
the one time he watched you eat a monster whole was the first time he learned something deeper about you
he then realized that it wasn’t a coincidence that he couldn’t find anything about you
anyways, back to the confession
he’s come up with an entire plan in his head, but he really has no idea how to execute it
he wants to make it as memorable as possible for you!
except… would you even like a grand confession (of companionship)?
in the end, he took you out to a fancy dinner under the guise of “just another dinner date with your boss”
he’ll tell you his feelings at home
he has an inkling that you’d prefer it that way. intimate and private.
“hey…” aventurine starts, sitting down next to you on the bed after his shower, “i’ve been thinking…”
you naturally pull the towel off his shoulders and stand up to dry his hair for him. “you think?”
“stop, i’m serious,” he complains, punching your stomach playfully before burying his face in your shirt. “hear me out, you oversized snake.”
that’s the first time you’ve heard that nickname. “what?” you can’t help but be amused at the creative insults, then you let out a soft sigh and shut your mouth.
“you know how you’re now my permanent assistant?” aventurine slowly says, wrapping his arms around your waist as you work on his head, “can i… can we keep having this arrangement?”
you reply with a hum, but your tone slides up towards the end, like you’re asking a question. he chuckles, of course you’re confused, you’re so dense sometimes.
aventurine shifts around until he’s looking up at you. “this. you and i, living together, taking care of each other,” he elaborates, his eyes half-closed from how tired he is, “can you… stay?” then, with a quieter voice, he adds, “with me?”
you take some time to think about it as you toss the towel aside and bring out the hair dryer
from what you know about him, this is a very, very big request for him
he’s essentially asking if he can rely on you
even though he’s probably relied on himself most of his life
he wants to put his faith in you? you’re flattered, really
it seems like he’s also checking off a lot boxes for what people call “love”
according the the movies and books you’ve watched and read, anyway
but he’s not calling it “love”? is this something else, then?
you start blow drying his hair, carding through his blond locks with your free hand
he relaxes into your touch
“well? your answer?” aventurine asks, a slight shake in his voice as he peeks at you nervously.
“you sound like the protagonist of a romance movie,” you remark, leaning down to give him a quick peck on his head, “is this what it is?”
suddenly, it dawns on you why exactly were there flowers at dinner
roses, no less
but jeez, you did not need to call him out like that
what happened to oblivious and clueless?
then again, you’re bad with your own emotions, but you’re horribly good at reading others’
he flushes and hides his face in your stomach
he just wants to hear your answer, not hear you point out he’s probably extremely smitten with you
and it’s probably worse that you compared him to the lead actors in a romance movie
is he so obvious? is he not subtle at all?
does this mean you’ve known all along? you just didn’t want to make the first move?
or do you not feel the same way?
oh no, he’s overthinking again
“aventurine,” you call, snapping him out of his trance, “if you don’t say no, i’ll assume this is a love confession.”
man, why would you say it like that? it’s not that he can deny it, but if you’re going to be so damn straightforward…
“it… it is, i suppose, in more ways than one,” he whimpers in embarrassment, “will you, then, uh, will you say yes?”
he wants to trust you with all of himself so bad
finally he won’t have to shoulder everything alone anymore
he’ll tell you everything about his upbringing, even the ugliest parts
he’s been yearning for someone to hear him, to see him for so long
will you be his person?
he’s so excited and so scared
more scared than excited, actually
there are more issues he’ll need to work through, but for now?
he wants your promise
he doesn’t think he’ll ever come across someone as perfect as you again
so he really, really, really needs you to say yes
as the low whirr of the hair dryer comes to a stop, you set the little device on the nightstand and sit down next to aventurine. you sandwich his face between your palms and make him meet your gaze – you’ll never get used to how mystically pretty his eyes are – as you flash him a lazy smile.
“if you’re sure you want me,” you mumble; it seems that you are just as embarrassed as he is, “then… by all means.”
just as he’s going to throw himself into your arms, you stand up
?????? where are you going ??????
oh, you’re just going to put away the hair dryer and the towel
and also bring a spare scarf back with you?
did you forget that you have yours hanging on your neck
he’s so over the moon right now he’s all giddy and all over the place inside
are you perhaps the same?
when you come back, he practically throws himself into your lap
you avoid his eyes
holy shit you’re cute when you’re flustered
you’re blushing
you, who’s usually so stoic and unresponsive, is blushing!!
and trying to hide your face without resorting to your scarf!!
in the end you give up and instead pull him so close that he can’t see your expression
he doesn’t know what he’s asking out, you think, he doesn’t know what he’s trying to trust
which makes it all the more endearing to you
and it makes you want to make sure you live up to his expectations
this little mortal has you wrapped around his finger, and you don’t find yourself annoyed at all
in fact you want to shelter him and coddle him so badly that you’re tempted to act on instinct
tempted to. you can’t, because of a lot a lot of reasons
again, seriously, you’ve been hanging around mortals for far too long
you gently press his face into your shoulder. “aven-”
“kakavasha,” he corrects, “call me kakavasha. please.”
“okay, kakavasha.” you don’t hesitate, and you move to massage his scalp. “your real name?”
it seems like he’s in no mood to talk, because all he gives you is a quiet hum in affirmation; you agree with him, you don’t feel like talking much, either.
you pull away slightly to kiss right above his ear. then you did something he would’ve never expected you to do – with your nimble fingers, you wrapped the extra scarf in your hands around his neck, gave it a few loops then secured it with the same knot you use to secure yours.
what just happened
you slowly pull away with a soft pat to the piece of cloth
did you just give him…?
you did. you did, you mad danger noodle of incomprehensible mass
two faceless creatures with drool dripping from their maws stare at him
they’re connected to the scarf you put on him
he’s feeling so many things right now
even if he doesn’t quite understand what this means, he at least knows that you’ve given him a literal part of yourself
you’re very into this idea of being with him, huh…?
boy, he’s so glad he decided to confess
because he would’ve never known had he not asked
and what do you mean he would’ve missed out on something so wonderful?
this is also the first time someone outside of his family has ever given him something so precious and personal
he awkwardly reaches out to pet them
they nudge against his hand happily?
that’s weirdly adorable for a creature that has a diet of literal monsters
and much like satisfied pets, they disappear into the scarf after they’ve gotten their fill of petting
“for me?” aventurine- no, kakavasha asks, tentatively running his hands across the smooth fabric.
“proof of my loyalty to you,” you reply, taking his hand and placing kisses on his every finger.
what you don’t tell him is that your promise will last for eternity and beyond – even if you fight, or part ways, you’ll always watch over him. he doesn’t need to know that. not yet, anyway.
“you…” kakavasha feels like he’s a child all over again. he’s safe, he’s not making a wager, he’s not going to win or lose here, he can finally take a breather. “you have no idea…”
he buries his face into you, grabs your sides so he can press his body tightly against yours, and he sobs into your chest. he isn’t surprised at all that the scarf around your neck would wrap around him too, and he’s just all bundled up in you.
“shh, shh.” you pat his back and rock him back and forth. “easy now,” you whisper, “i’m here, kakavasha.”
aeons, he really, really loves the sound of your voice, especially when you say his name. when it was aventurine, you were reliable, loyal, and above all, gentle; when he finally allows you to call him kakavasha, every syllable from your lips drips with unspoken affection and a gratefulness that he’s unused to.
maybe someday he’ll finally be able to proudly profess his love to you. but at this very moment…
this is enough.
#honkai star rail#honkai star rail x reader#aventurine#aventurine x reader#ares's voracity pathstrider tales
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make you cry | part two: beomgyu's ending
part one
pairing: choi beomgyu x you
summary: after your feelings for beomgyu are revealed, you take some time to heal from your "breakup". as for beomgyu, he's realizing just how important you are to him, but it may be too little too late.
genre: romance, angst, smut (MDNI), fwb
warnings: smut (mdni), unprotected sex, creampie, sub!gyu, oral (f. rec), dacryphilia, dirty talk, praise, degradation (m. rec), if i missed anything lmk
word count: 3.4k
notes: hello again friends! am i satisfied with this? no. am i still posting it? YES. as you may know, there will be an alternate ending with hyuka as the lead. i will probably post that on my bday (the 24th). until then, i hope you enjoy this! and again.. pls don't be mean ;_; i'm still new to writing smut and this is not proofread
it’s almost been a year since the night you said goodbye to beomgyu. time has healed most things, but your rage certainly helped speed it along. throwing away old polaroids beomgyu took of the both of you, past birthday cards he wrote when he was feeling particularly sentimental, and clothes he had forgotten to take home with him most definitely aided your catharsis, even if you did it all in the midst of a rampage. do you regret it now that you’re relatively calm? maybe a little bit, but not having reminders of beomgyu around your home outweighs any sliver of regret you may or may not harbor. traces of him fade from your body first, then your mind, then your heart. you still sort of miss him, that much is clear, but when you really think about it, you’re not sure why that is. so you try not to think about it at all.
you're doing okay now, truly. it's not like you forgive him or anything, but you're not as angry as you used to be, which, you know, is better than nothing. you regret sleeping with him, regret not speaking up for yourself sooner, even regret taking his hand when he held it in front of you all those years ago, but you're starting to realize that it doesn't matter anymore. what's done is done, no use crying over it any longer. as for everything beomgyu did to you, he did it and he meant it. fuck whatever explanations he has.
on beomgyu’s end, it's not like he hasn't tried to contact you, but that only resulted in you blocking him on every conceivable plane. he convinced one of his friends to give him his instagram login so he can see your posts, but that’s about all he has to go off of these days. from the looks of it, it seems like you’re doing pretty well on your own. your friendship with kai seems to have strengthened because you’re calling him your best friend now, and who knows if you’re fucking each other. the jealousy he feels is all-consuming. to be honest, beomgyu knows he wasn’t the best of friends towards you, even before the hooking up, but he still feels wronged somehow. he’s thought, in great detail, about how he would act if the roles were reversed, but that only makes him feel worse. because he’d forgive you. he’d be angry for a while, this much he knows, but he’d always forgive you. you are, or were, his best friend, after all. and maybe even something more, but he doesn’t want to think about that.
he’s shown up at your apartment, too. especially while drunk. sometimes, it’s because he misses you. most times, it’s because he’s so drunk it feels like the only place that feels like home. you never open the door, though. he likes to think it’s because you’re not there, but after the fifth time, he knows better.
-
well, it had to happen sooner or later. your town is only so big and your friend circle is so small, of course running into beomgyu was not a matter of if, but when. even still, he looks positively shocked to see you at the house party of one of kai’s friends. as soon as you lock eyes with him, you know you’re in for it. you should leave, and you really, really would, but it’s a birthday party and kai’s your designated driver. you’d make him look bad if you left so soon, so you decide the best course of action is to get drunk so your head stops hurting. after downing some drinks, you carefully avoid beomgyu and make your way to some random bedroom just to cool off.
you’re a few drinks in, head buzzing and tongue feeling heavy. it was bitter work, but each shot had you feeling less and less suffocated by beomgyu’s presence. you wish you didn’t care as much as you do, but the feeling is still there. seeing him should spark nothing in you, but you can’t help but feel indignant. and honestly? a little sad, too. things have gotten better, but all the old feelings have been dredged up with a vengeance.
while you’re trying not to think about him, as if on cue, beomgyu bursts through the door.
“h-hi,” he says hesitantly. really? that’s it? hi?
“uh… hi?” you say unsurely, kind of at a loss for words.
“how are you?”
“what do you want?” you ask as if he’s a fly who won’t stop buzzing around you. he supposes, in a way, he is.
“i-i just wanna talk to you,” he says meekly.
“about what? there's nothing left to say,” you argue. and with that, you rise from the bed, preparing to leave.
“i’m sorry!” he exclaims, the words leaving his mouth before he can get a chance to reel them back in. “i’m just… really, really sorry.”
“i don’t care,” you say flatly, crossing your arms and not even sparing him a glance. now that stings.
“but i’m sorry!” he repeats, just like a child. “can’t you forgive me?”
“and what exactly are you sorry for?” you turn to look at him. “sorry for treating me like shit for years, sorry you fucked me when i told you i wasn’t interested, or sorry because i’m not there at your beck and call anymore?” his face crumbles at your unforgiving words.
“i’m… i’m sorry for how i treated you. i know i was wrong, but i’ll never do it again if you just give me a chance.”
“no,” you reply firmly.
“please?” he begs, teary-eyed and words unsteady.
“what exactly do you want from me?” you sigh irritatedly. “if you want things to go back to how they were before, you’re out of your fucking mind.”
“what if i don’t want things to go back to how they were?
“then what do you want?” you ask, genuinely curious now.
“i want you, that’s all. things don’t need to go back to how they were. i just need you.”
“need me?” you laugh dryly. “you need me now? you only miss me because you don’t have me at your service anymore. stop wasting my fucking time.”
“that’s not true! i miss you. i-i know i’m late, but i really miss you. i’m sorry i didn’t realize it sooner.” he looks so… pathetic like this. it’d be sad if it weren’t so goddamn vindicating. before you can come up with a response, he’s hurriedly saying his next words.
“i-if you wanted me to learn my lesson, i’ve learned it. i promise i have. i promise i’ll never, ever take you for granted again.”
“beomgyu,” you sigh, closing your eyes and massaging your temples, “this isn’t about teaching you a lesson. this is about me not being willing to put up with you anymore.” he looks absolutely devastated by your harsh words.
“i’m begging you,” he says, voice shaking like a leaf.
“why does it matter? what, you haven’t been able to get your dick wet? do you need pussy on tap again?” he blushes at your words. you must’ve hit a sore spot.
“so that’s it. you don’t miss me at all. you just want to take advantage of me.” you don’t know why, but your own words don’t just hurt him, but yourself. you’re not sure what you were expecting, but you can't help but feel disappointed. missing you is still all about him. what he wants, what he thinks he needs.
“i love you,” he says. what?
“w-what?”
“i love you,” he repeats with more vigor. "i didn’t know it then, but i know it now. i miss you so much because i love you. and i want to be with you.” this whole thing is so ridiculous, you don’t know whether to laugh in his face or beat the shit out of him, but you can’t deny the way your heart flutters (and clenches) at his words.
“you have no idea what you’re talking about,” you say coldly. what the hell does beomgyu know about love? love is selfless, self-sacrificing. he doesn’t know a fucking thing about that. this must be a new way of trying to keep you all to himself. but it’s working.
“i know you don’t think i do, and i understand why. i just want you to give me a chance to show you that i mean it. i’ll do anything.”
he’s annoying, no doubt, but you like how he looks when he begs. you could get used to this.
how do you say no to him when he’s begging so feverishly like this? beomgyu hasn’t begged for anything in his fucking life. he hasn’t needed to, given how easily everything has worked out for him thus far. but this new side of him sparks a new fire in you you had no idea existed. you’re struck with a sadistic new idea you will probably regret, but right now? you want to act on it.
“anything?”
“anything,” he says so quickly you can’t help but laugh a little.
“then strip,” you command.
“w-what?” he asks, eyes blown wide in shock.
“you heard me.”
“b-but the party?”
“whatever,” you sneer. “if you’re not going to do it, i’m leaving.” you turn to leave, but he yanks you back and looks at you with pleading eyes.
“i’ll do it,” he says with newfound determination. you slyly lock the door and he gulps before pulling his shirt over his head. he’s been naked before you many times, but this feels different. he feels like he’s being scrutinized to a degree where he can feel your eyes boring into him. you tilt your chin up and raise your eyebrows expectantly. with shaky hands, he undoes his pants and lets them fall to the floor. he’s embarrassingly hard already, if the tent in his boxers is of any indication, which only makes you smile meanly.
“i don’t remember telling you to stop,” you say arrogantly. he gulps and finishes undressing, cock slapping comically into his stomach. he stands fully naked and feels smaller than he ever has. you push him onto the bed and he wonders what you have in store for him.
you straddle him, still fully clothed, but hiking your dress up just a bit so he can see how soaked you are through your panties. he whines when you take one of his hardened nipples between your fingers and experimentally tweak it.
“do you like that, beomie?”
he nods feverishly and says “like it, like it so much!” you smirk in satisfaction as you plant a searing kiss on his chest and he can’t bite back his moans. between you sucking a blooming hickey and toying with his chest, his mind is fuzzy and all he can feel is pure ecstasy.
this isn’t about him, though. and you make that clear when you move and situate your clothed pussy over his face.
“sit on my face, please, please, please. wanna taste you,” he cries. well, you won’t say no this time.
you hold onto the headboard as he moves your ruined panties to the side and he gasps when he sees how wet you are. he whines again, showing you just how badly he wants to be in it, but all you do is lower yourself onto him. his tongue is skilled, just like it’s always been, but there’s a sense of desperation that wasn’t there before. he switches between fucking your hole with his warm tongue and sucking on your clit like a man starved. you feel your legs buckling as you reach your end, but his hands grip your soft thighs even after you finish, lapping at your pussy like a damn dog.
“ah, too much! b-bad boy!” you exclaim. that doesn’t stop him though, and now you’re sober enough to notice how desperately he’s fucking into nothing at all. his cock, usually so pretty and pink, is now a deep red color from the lack of reprieve.
you thread one hand in his hair, just to have something to hold onto, and he groans into your pussy when you lightly tug his hair. before you can do anything more, you’re falling apart on his tongue and crying out his name. a sound he never thought in a million years he’d hear again, but what a lovely sound it is.
“sit on my cock, p-please?” he begs when you finally raise from his face.
“you’re not in a position to be asking me for anything, beomgyu,” you say.
“please? baby, it’s aching.” you throw a look back and see he’s right. it’s beet red and leaking an ungodly amount of precum. your pussy clenches around nothing when you see how desperate he is for you.
“please? need you,” he says with tears in his eyes.
after all this time, you’re still so fucking weak for him. you sigh as you take off your dress and his eyes widen when he watches your breasts bounce as you toss the tiny little thing somewhere behind you.
he goes to grab them, but you slap his hands away and it’s all he can do to keep himself from kicking his feet like a toddler throwing a tantrum.
“but why?!” he asks frustratedly.
“bad boys don’t get to touch,” you shrug, and he’s a split second away from whining when you harshly grab the base of his cock, shutting him up once and for all. before you can lower yourself onto him, he’s cutting into your desire with his next words.
“a-are you fucking him?” he asks meekly. it doesn’t take a genius to figure out he’s talking about kai.
“why do you care? aren’t you the one who’s always going on and on about ‘no strings attached’?” you spit and he looks sorrier than you’ve ever seen him. to be honest, you’re not fucking kai. you’ve never seen each other that way, actually. he’s been nothing short of amazing to you, to be sure, but his lingering feelings for his ex and yours for beomgyu didn’t make for the best foundation for love. at this point, you were the best of friends. nothing more, nothing less. but beomgyu doesn’t need to know that.
any words of complaint on his part are cut short by you sinking down on him.
“mmh… o-oh my god,” he says hoarsely as the tip of his cock pushes through your entrance. it’s always been a tight fit, but you’ve been celibate for nearly a whole year. your muscles aren’t used to the intrusion and he can feel it. still, you continue sinking down onto him until every inch is sheathed in you and he’s touching your cervix. you can swear you feel him in your womb. his tears are falling freely now as he can feel you adjust around him, pussy clenching against your will as you try to accommodate his length and girth.
“s-so pretty,” he says as his bleary eyes try to focus on you. you let out an airy laugh, but truthfully, you aren’t faring much better. he looks so perfect like this, sobs coming from his pretty mouth and tears spilling over his reddened cheeks. that’s all the permission you need to really start. slowly, you pull yourself up with no little effort on your part. your pussy nearly turns inside out trying to get yourself off of his length. the lewd image engraves itself in his eyes and he cries even harder.
“l-love you, love you, love you so much,” he whines, eyes rolling back from the pleasure. his mouth is open and you think you might even see a bit of drool pooling at the corners of his lips. you don’t respond, but instead you mercilessly sink back down in one fluid motion.
“ah!” you both cry out at the feeling. you’re so full, you can barely stand it, so you don’t. up and down, you begin bobbing on his cock with little regard for his sorry state. he grabs your hips, pulling you down and fucking up into you, not once letting you falter in your pace. his grip will leave bruises, but you’re not interested in the repercussions of your actions now as beomgyu grits his teeth and rams harder and harder into you. he’s so lost in the feeling, he no longer cares about your so-called rules as he grabs your bare tits and pops one in his mouth. he begins sucking and rubbing his tongue on it and his big, veiny hand is busy teasing the other one.
“i- i thought i said you don’t get to touch,” you manage to choke out between gasps.
“c-can’t help it! your tits are so pretty!” he says as if it’s completely out of his control. and it really might be. beomgyu doesn’t look like he’s in control of anything at this very moment. he just didn’t realize how much he’d love the feeling. with his words of praise and the suckling of your chest, you feel yourself coming closer and closer to the edge.
“gyu, i’m coming!” you exclaim as spasm around him. a few seconds later, and you feel his hot seed overflowing from your insides. after a couple of more sloppy thrusts, you’re collapsing on top of him and panting heavily.
“so good, so perfect,” he whispers before pulling out. what you don’t expect is how he flips you over onto the bed and slides himself in your aching cunt again.
“g-gyu?!” you stutter.
“j-jus’ wanna show you how much i missed you,” he slurs, mouth agape and eyes totally glazed over. he hikes your legs up over his shoulders and pistons in and out of you at an ungodly pace. he’s so deep, you can feel hot tears spring in your eyes as you struggle to take all of him in. he leans over and shoves his tongue in your accepting mouth.
“good pussy,” he says in a daze when he parts from you. “so fucking tight. j-jus’ for me, right?” he asks, and you can hear the insecurity in his voice. you’re silent for a moment before you answer quietly.
“just for you.” he smiles as if he’s relieved and continues to fuck you into the mattress until he’s painting your insides again. he pulls out and the sinful sight of cum leaking out of your puffy hole sears his eyes. you look so beautiful like this, when you’re full of nothing but him. the thought of doing this forever, just you and him and no one else, is enough to make him feel happiness he’s never felt before.
he collapses next to you and pulls you into his warm embrace. he’s never done this before. not after sex, anyway, but he’s shown you the most vulnerable sides of him tonight. the sides you used to cry about not being able to see.
“you didn’t answer my question before,” beomgyu whispers.
“what?” you ask, still in a daze.
“are you fucking him?” you want to sit up and smack him, but he cages you in his arms. leave it to beomgyu to ruin the mood
“... no, but i just don’t see why you would care. weren’t you getting your dick wet until you couldn’t find anyone else?”
“i wasn’t! i… i couldn’t get hard for them…” he trails off, almost hoping you didn’t hear. but you did. you don’t know whether to laugh or cry. is he serious?
“and the only reason why i’m asking is because i just can’t stand to see you with anyone else.” for some reason, your temper flares at this.
“yeah? well imagine how i felt for years.” he’s silent at this. how can he make up for years of making you feel like garbage? and how could you bear feeling like this for years on end? it hasn’t quite been a year for him yet, but he feels absolutely gutted. every day without you is miserable, to say the very least. and seeing you with someone else? heartbreaking.
“being together is a bad idea,” you sigh after putting some thought into it. “we’ll just fight and —”
“we won’t fight!” he exclaims. “why would we fight? i’ll just listen to anything you say!”
oh. you could really, really get used to this.
notes pt. 2: is it normal to never be satisfied w what u write? bc that's how i feel ;_; but whatever! it is what it is i fear. anyway, i hope u still enjoyed it!
taglist: @my313 @superbbananananana @lonelybutterflytae @cherrycolaberry @everythingvirgoes @beomnoullitheorem @sunny4cast
series taglist*: @gothraccoons @jaxyy219 @idontwantoeatspicy @soobsfairy444 @denleave1088 @notevenheretbh1 @fairfootedflekk @hihello-pinky @ilovesimjaeyun143 @sweetttkissess @seolis-world @midwinterblizzard @slutty-cherry @run2min
*not everyone's tag options were open, but i still put ur user in so u can see that i tried!! also, if you're an ageless blog, i'd prefer if you didn't read my works even if you're not a minor because it makes me uncomfortable. for that reason, you were not tagged. thank u friends <3
#niningtori#make you cry#beomgyu hard thoughts#beomgyu hard hours#beomgyu smut#txt smut#txt hard hours#txt hard thoughts#mdni#beomgyu x reader#beomgyu angst#txt angst
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Team Bonding Night
Part 5 - Fire on Fire Series
A/N: I do have up to chapter 14ish of this pre-planned however if anyone has anything they might want to see in it please let me know and I will try to include it in here somewhere, if I don't already have it included.
Tonight was team bonding night and you decided that you would start the year right and offer to hold the first team bonding of the year. Stina and Frida came over and helped you set up. It was decided there would be a few games of pool before a movie. As all the girls arrived there were plenty of comments about how fancy your place was and how your parents must be rich, they were all light hearted and really just jokes but unbeknownst to everyone they all hit a nerve, but you had prepared for this and so you just ignored it, knowing that the girls meant nothing.
You had just performed the break shot for the last game of the night when Leah came up behind you, wrapping her arms around your waist as she rested her chin on your shoulder. You were almost expecting a comment from someone or even at least a look from Beth, who kept teasing you about ‘your very close friendship with Leah’, at Leah’s actions however no one batted an eyelid. But it was most likely because Leah was known for her hugs and hugging people, so much so that it didn’t even surprise you when she did it.
“Hello,” you said as she turned her head so it rested on your shoulder, “as much as I appreciate this it’s almost my turn again,” you informed her, she just hummed before letting you go.
The pool game was coming to an end, with Katie and Caitlin having two remaining balls to sink whilst you and Steph were now trying to sink the 8-ball, so Stina decided to start setting up for the movie, opening the door to the gym to get the bean bags.
“Holy Crap, how do you have so many trophies and medals?” Alessia let out, announcing the fact to the whole team, causing you to wish that you could just vanish right there and then, not even thinking about the fact everyone would see them, whilst you were getting ready, to be fair Alessia wasn’t over reacting, you had a large amount of Trophies. With at least one trophy for every football season, and at least two medals per season, plus an assortment of Track & Field and Cross Country trophies and medals, the collection grew pretty quickly.
“Where are they all from?” Kyra asked in awe, “Well school gave us them, if you scored the most goals, and then each season we got medals, and all the cross country and Track ones are school, and then obviously club football too,”
“You got medals and trophies for sport? Like regularly,” “Yeah, at awards nights, we got them for academic stuff too,”
“See that’s what happens when you go to a School like Melbourne Grammar, you’ve got to sit through the several hours long assemblies regularly.” Steph joked, it was something you always complained about to her.
“Isn’t Melbourne Grammar Expensive? Wait but is it true that your parents are also totally rich?” Katie asked, you just slightly nodded as you saw Leah’s eye widen from across the room at the mention of your parents, thankfully Beth diverted the conversation without anyone returning to the topic.
______
You were sitting on the couch next to Leah as you all watched a movie. At some point Leah’s arm migrated to be around your back with her hand resting on your waist and you had dropped your head to rest on her shoulder.
“You must’ve had a good childhood,” Katie said as she looked around at the photos of you on the wall, you grinning in almost every single one, your Aunt’s by your side for a lot of them. However you hadn’t noticed she was looking at the photos and you thought that she was still on about the whole money thing, but not wanting to make a big deal you didn’t want to say much, so you settled with a simple “sure,” sounding a little annoyed.
“Oh did you never get a pony,” her joke sent you over the edge and so you snapped, you felt Leah’s hand grip onto your wrist as you stood up encouraging you not to do so, but you just ripped your arm from her grip.
“No Katie. I got a Pony. I’m just an embarrassment to the family according to my parents. I was told that football didn't matter, that the thing I was best at and loved was pointless and never going to happen as the family reputation needed to be upheld. I missed my first ever national camp, because I wasn't allowed to go, because it would’ve meant I would miss too much school, and CEOs, CFOs, doctors, professors or board members don’t take days off school. I have never made my parents proud, the more milestones I reach in my career, the more successful I am the more I become a failure to them. So yes, I did have money, and I thankfully had two very kind hearted women who made up for the fact I didn’t have parents, but my life wasn’t and will never be pure rainbows and sunshine,” you felt tears well up in your eyes as you suddenly realised you had just revealed a major part of your past to not just Katie but the whole team, you felt all eyes in the room on you, you couldn’t stay, you felt like the dam would break soon and you couldn’t embarrass yourself further in front of the team, so you got up, you left the room and headed towards the stairs, not knowing what else to do.
You slid down the wall of the spare bedroom upstairs as you dropped your head, holding it in your hands as you began to cry.
Stina had followed you and she quickly came to sit by your side, pulling you into her side.
“I can’t believe I did that, I just, jag bara. Jag tänkte inte och nu vet de alla. Tänk om-” (I just. I didn’t think and now they all know. What if-)
“Y/N/N andetag, ta några djupa andetag” (breath, take some deep breaths), Stina instructed you as she placed her hands on your shoulders, shifting to be kneeling in front of you.
A light knock was heard from the door and Beth and Steph popped their heads around the corner, “Oh sorry, we just thought you might want some water,” Stina nodded her head and they came in, placing the water on the floor next to you.
“Tack,” (thank you) you replied forgetting you weren’t talking to Stina anymore, “Sorry, thank you,” both women nodded and smiled before turning around to head out.
“Will Katie hate me now?” you ask no one specifically, causing the two women to turn around again.
“Y/N, no she won't, if anything I think she feels bad and is worried you won’t like her anymore.” Beth said and you nodded softly.
“Is everyone still downstairs?” You questioned, “No, Leah is letting them all out,” Steph told you nodded as you relaxed a little again, “I should probably go, Kyra will be waiting for me,” “yeah, Viv will be waiting for me,” “I think I’m taking Frida home, unless you want us to stay,” “No, its okay, I should go see if Leah is still here and apologise to her,” as you walked down the stairs you saw Leah standing in the middle of the living room fiddling with her wrist, you walked up to her.
“I’m sorry, did I hurt you?” You asked and she wrapped her arms around you, to give you a hug.
“No, it’s okay, you didn’t, but I’m sorry for not letting you speak up, I know she was only joking but it still wasn't right.” she said as she tried to pull back, “as much as I would love to stay and talk I think Lia is waiting for me in the car,” you let go of the hug as your mood slightly dropped “oh,” you said taking a step back, “come over for breakfast tomorrow?” “of course” she replied smiling and you returned the smile before she let herself out.
“So,” Steph said as she walked into the room, “That was,” Beth followed, dragging out as she couldn’t find the right word, “Palpable,” Stina said, assisting Beth.
“Please don’t I’ve already told you we’re just friends,”
“Okay,” they all replied with a raised eyebrow before hugging you and saying their goodbyes.
_______
You were sitting at the kitchen island next to Leah as you ate breakfast when the doorbell rang.
“Oh, I’ll go get that, don’t you dare eat any more of my food,” you looked at her and she smirked, “Leah, don’t,” you instructed her again as you opened the door.
“Oh Katie, hi,” your words were enough for Leah to get up out of her chair and come over to where you were at the door.
“Erm, hi,” the Irish woman said, “I just wanted to apologise for last night, I erm, I shouldn’t hav-” “It’s okay Katie, you couldn’t have known and I’m sorry for snapping at you, I, well some stuff is going on with my family, more my parents currently, so it’s just something that is currently a sensitive topic, usually it doesn’t bug me,” you cut her off, “Erm, okay yeah, sorry,” she said still kind of awkwardly, “It’s okay,” you reminded her as you pulled her in for a hug, “you’re welcome to join us for breakfast if you want.”
Katie took you up on your offer and so you, Leah and her all had breakfast together before driving to training.
#woso#woso fanfics#woso community#woso imagine#woso x reader#arsenal wfc#awfc x reader#awfc#leah williamson x reader#leah williamson#wosoamazing fireonfire
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Hello! can you see a girl reader who wants to be perfect in everything (in appearance, in weight and in work) and cries if someone bypasses her? characters: adam or lucifer :)
I’m so excited for the ask! I’m happy to try and oblique. I’m not certain I 100% understand your ask so if what I’ve written isn’t what you meant, send in another ask!
Thank you for your patience while I got to this as well!
Both scenarios for both characters are going to be written with established relationships (friendship bordering on romantic for Adam, a romantic relationship for Lucifer).
Both stories were only quickly proofread.
Trigger Warnings for Lucifer's story: suicide, self harm, self depreciation
.˳·˖✶𓆩𓁺𓆪✶˖·˳. ✶✶ Adam ✶✶ .˳·˖✶𓆩𓁺𓆪✶˖·˳.
Adam x fem!reader
Song that fits the vibe: Sleep Token - DYWTYLM
Adam was used to seeing women cry; usually tears of joy from having their brains fucked out by the dickmaster himself or subsequently tears of sorrow when he made it clear he didn’t want them and their clingy bullshit around long term. Regardless, they were a pretty regular thing for him to have to deal with.
In the time he had gotten to known you, which was decently long since he tended to get bored of the winners, he hadn’t ever seen you shed a tear. Even when you both had initially met and he had said some rude ass shit to you, you gave him grace. You were much like Emily in the sense that you were usually a bundle of joy full of understanding, forgiveness, love for all, blah-blah-blah.
Only you were hotter. WAY hotter.
In his books you were the hottest winner he had ever seen and based on how you acted, you knew you were good looking. You acted sheepish and tried to downplay any compliments you got but he noticed the way you glowed when you got them. You fed off of it. Taking pride in your appearance. You were always dressing to the nines, going through every known self care routine, and working out; even though you didn’t need to in heaven. You had it down to a science at this point with all of it seemingly coming so effortlessly to you.
Even the work you had taken up to help out the angels who needed it was easy for you. You only ever needed instructions once and you could repeat it back flawlessly performing it with ease.
The only more impressive thing besides being the most flawless being of all the heavenly creatures was that you, of all the winners out there, had impressed HIM. Besides killing sinners and fighting, you might even rank higher than Lute for badass bitches. He wouldn’t admit that openly of course. Lute would be pissed. Plus, that would make it seem like he liked you too much and he wouldn’t want to blow up your ego. He wouldn’t want to have to eat his own words down the line.
Yet, one day as Adam had rounded the corner, after a long boring ass meeting with the counsel, and he saw you standing in the vacant hallway with your head down and fists clenched. What the fuck were you doing? He started to ask until he noticed that though your hair covered your gorgeous face, he could see the tears falling to the ground. Your shoulders shaking slightly as you tried to quell the downpour.
The moment he got his barings, he started marching over to you. “Who the FUCK do I have to kill?” Your head whipped up, your eyes puffy and cheeks red. Somehow the tears that littered the marble floor hadn’t disturbed the perfect makeup you had dawned.
“A-Adam?” you gasp out, suddenly trying to dab dry your face with the back of your hands.
“Tell me who made you cry and I’ll fucking slaughter them.” Adam growled out. As he neared you, his approach slowed but the moment you were within arms reach his hands shot out to gently grab your face. His thumbs lightly rubbing away the tears while trying not to fuck with your make up. His eyes roamed your face, taking in how haggard you look, before locking eyes with you, “Give me a name sugartits. I’ll show ‘em not to mess with THE Adam’s friend.”
The intensity Adam was emitting was a little intimidating and yet, the way he was holding your face was so tender. You couldn’t help but lean into his touch as you brought your hands up to cover his. Tears started to well in your eyes again as you took a shaky breath.
He started to simultaneously panic and get wildly more pissed off the moment it looked like you were going to start crying again. His only tell that he was internally raging was that his eyebrows furrowed more, until you brought his hands down away from your face. You held onto them though as you lightly pressed them to your chest, right above your plush bust.
This was the first time you had ever considered talking about this with anyone. Usually you could hold yourself together long enough to get to your room before you fell apart but, today it had all been too much. The fear was overwhelming. The fear of being replaced. Of being tossed aside. You had done everything perfectly. They all had said so. They had sung your praises since you had come and yet now, their attentions had turned elsewhere. How was it that people could suddenly turn their affections to someone else when you had done it all right? You desperately needed the validation; the vindication. You had done it all right, hadn’t you? Where had you gone wrong? What did you DO wrong? How could you fix this?
You look up to Adam with your misty doe eyes. His gauze tightly fixated on you. He was an honest person. Unkindly sometimes but, he was honest. If anyone was going to tell you how you had fucked up and how you could fix it, Adam would.
“It-It…it’s just…” your breathing is shaky so you take a moment before continuing. “I feel…I feel like I messed up and I don’t know how to fix it. There’s…there’s a new winner. She’s really kind, smart, funny, and so pretty. She’s…” you choke up for a moment thinking about all the ways she’s attractive in the ways you aren’t, “SO pretty… and helpful. She’s so fast at everything she does. I…I…”
“Okay sugartits you’ve lost me. Why were you crying over some new winner?” he asked, utterly bewildered.
You tear your hands away from him as your eyes well up again. You shouldn’t have expected him to understand. “EVERYONE wants her help… I haven’t been able to help anyone out since shortly after she ascended and I feel so…so useless. She’s replacing me… I’m… I’m replaceable… how? I thought I did everything right? She’s so much better than me-”
“Shut the fuck up.”
The words stunned you into silence and halted your spiral, just as the tears had started flowing again. “You really think some dumb bitch is going to walk up in here and take YOUR place?” he scoffed rolling his whole head, “Yeah fucking right. I give it a week tops before she fucks up. As if some rando new winner can take YOUR place. They’ll be crawling back to you asking for your help. BEGGING for your help. You being the goody two-shoe you are though will forgive them for being stupid and will go back to being #1 at whatever boring paperwork they have you doing.”
“But…why would they just… What did I do wrong?” you ask with a hoarse voice his explanation not making sense.
“Do wrong?” He gasped out, “You couldn’t do a damn thing wrong in your life if you tried. They’re just being fucking dumb. You’re better than every other winners out there and when they realize that you need to rub it in their face. Make them LOATH the day they thought they could replace you. Until they pull their heads out of their asses I’m sure I got some stuff you could help me with.”
He reached out and wiped away the tears again. The aching in your heart eased slightly knowing he wholeheartedly believed what he was saying and, for the moment, his conviction was enough for you. Not that it completely quelled your feelings but, you were able to manage them far better knowing you were still wanted in someone’s world.
His eyes lit up, “You know, you could come to meetings with me and take notes or whatever. Give me the cliffnotes. That shit is SO boring. I’m sure your notes will be better than the official ones they write up anyways and I don’t have to read that shit.”
You smile laughing softly, “I can definitely do that.”
He returned the smile, his thumbs lightly caressed your cheeks, before withdrawing his hands. His whole demeanor instantly reverting back to his usual cocky self. “Damn am I good at giving advice out or what? Just another way I’m FUCKING amazing. You know what, I deserve some goddamn ribs.” he hooted as he turned and started waltzing off.
Seconds later he turned and looked back realizing you were still standing there in a daze, “Come on sugartits I ain’t got all day!”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
♱𐕣 𖤐 𐕣♱ ☽𖤐☾ Lucifer ☽𖤐☾ ♱𐕣 𖤐 𐕣♱
Lucifer x fem!reader
Song that fits the vibe: She’s An Actor - Austin Giorgio
Trigger warning: suicide, self harm, self depreciation
You would have thought by now you would be used to being compared to other people.
Used to aiming for perfection,
without ever truly achieving it.
In life you had been constantly used as a pedestal; your sister, friends, co-works. It had never felt like you could claim the recognition you wanted despite having done everything right.
The perfect GPA in school with extracurriculars to the point you only got a few hours of sleep. Yet your sister’s athletic achievements in swim and cheer had always meant more to your parents.
The modeling career that you had gotten into, with your best friend following suit only for her to have gotten a contract a year before you. She had even attributed it to your help during a renowned shoot. An unintentional wound that drove you to the edge of your sanity; studying every fashion magazine, the extreme exercising, dieting, any pills that might help and you could get your hands on.
Then once you finally caught your own break, getting a contract with a big modeling firm, constantly being included in the creme dela crop of models. The never ending critiques of what outfit looked good on which body for x, y, z reasons. Even if you were chosen more than every other model in the company for being the most ideal woman to show off the reveried outfits of the season, you were nothing more than a manikin. Replaced at the drop of hat the moment you couldn’t do it.
You couldn’t stop yourself though. You had to do it all. You had to do it flawlessly. You were a failure if you didn’t.
Yet, somehow it was never good enough.
Damned if you do.
Damned if you don’t.
Even in death, the out you brought about convinced it would be your sweet release, hadn’t ended the torment.
You had only condemned yourself further.
The epitome of failure.
Why couldn’t you even die right?
How had you ever attracted Lucifer’s attention?
As you stood in the the hotel lobby, the Hazbin Hotel gala fundraiser in full swing with all the top sinners and hellborns mingling and enjoying the free event, you felt eyes scrutinizing you.
Your corset was cinched as tightly as it would go, reducing your waist dramatically, though giving you a somewhat nice hourglass shape. The mermaid style, galaxy themed dress had a sweetheart neckline and off the shoulder straps. It was a deep hue of royal purple on top before gradually fading to black starting at the hips as it descended your figure with gold and silver stars across the entirety of it, fit your figure snuggly and played off of Lucifer's pristine white and gold tux, his bowtie and pocket square the same royal purple. All your assets were perfectly held within the outfit, with tasteful peeks of skin showing beneath the chiffon overlay at your sides and a silt from just above the knee down. A golden snake choker with its head seated in your jugular notch, accenting your bust.
Lucifer hadn’t left your side since the event started. He had a hand incessantly lingering on your lower back as you both navigated the sea of people. You weren’t sure if the constant touch was for him or for you, but it helped steady you as you held yourself together by a thread. Every person you met was better than you in one way or another; status, poise, brand name outfit, professional makeup.
There was no hesitation with each new face in identifying any and every advantage or feature they had that you lacked. Another chip off your shoulder.
The socialite veneer seamlessly masking the degradation you were inflicting. The practiced saccharine smile never leaving your lips. Well timed laughs. A slight head tilt here to show your interest followed by a slight nod. The only honest part of your act was the high praise you sang regarding Charlie and her truly stunning optimism and strong willed determination.
You could feel the scrutiny lightening the longer the night went on. Some people even reapproached you and Lucifer to continue talking. Prior feigned politeness making way to many of the hellborns attempting political fanangling. Both you and Lucifer’s attempts to redirect the conversation back to the point of the party thwarted or outmaneuvered. Eventually, the conversations fell outside of your ability to participate. You had become an adornment.
You were so tired, so heavy.
Following a particularly trying bird guest whose smarmy quips were particularly taxing you excused yourself from the conversation, missing Lucifer’s panicked glance as you moved away. You just needed a break.
Just a quick one.
You looked yourself over in the mirror. Fixing any stray hairs. Correcting any smudges of lipstick or eyeliner. You noted the contour along your nose could have been darker to thin your fat nose. You’d need a tighter corset as well should you need to attend another party like this.
You backed up to further evaluate yourself.
The prettiest you can be and still you are disgusting.
Your eyes fluttered shut and you took a slow deep breath. No. No you looked good. This would be something you could wear for a shoot. You just needed to change a few small things. Maybe a couple things. Possibly one bit thing. All the comparisons throughout the night flooded your mind, a tsunami. If only you could change everything about yourself. All the things you lacked. All the things you needed to be. Nothing you could ever achieve.
You choked out a sob. Your hands crawling up your arms as you hugged yourself tightly. You dug your claws into your flesh. Stop this. You couldn’t break down now. The gala wasn’t over just yet. You squeezed your arms tighter, not realizing your claws had broken skin. The failed attempt to reel yourself in breaking you further. Failure. Why couldn’t you hold yourself together for a night? You hunched over as now silent tears hit the floor.
A knock sounded at the door.
You held your breath, eyes wide as you stood there. A breath in through the nose and out through the mouth. “One moment please! I’m almost finished!” you call, your voice taking on a melodic tone.
There was a pause. “Open the door sweetheart.”
Lucifer. You didn’t reply. Didn’t move. Didn’t breath. He knew you only used that voice when you were hiding a breakdown. It didn’t help that the bathroom was your go to place. “My sun, please?”
You crumbled.
The moment the door was unlocked he was in the bathroom with you. His small, lithe body slipping in and closing the door behind him. A soft smile greeting you despite the puffy eyes and tear streaks staining your made face.
“I’m ready when you are.” he whispered.
Your eyes widen and you’re frantic at the thought of being the cause of the king of hell leaving. Look at you fucking something else up tonight. Before you could say anything, a portal appeared behind Lucifer. He gently took your hands before he stepped back. He didn’t pull you though.
You stared at him; his gentle smile, soft eyes, adorable cheek marks. The tears started flowing again and your hands squeezed his. You stepped into his room in the hotel several floors up from where you both had been, the portal closing behind you.
A glittery red mist engulfing the both of you before disappearing in seconds. Both of you in the dark blue rubber duckie pajamas he had created for your 1 month anniversary however long ago. His a short sleeve shirt with loose fitting pants and yours a spaghetti strap dress that flowed down to your knees. The gashes on your arms cleaned and bandaged up. Your hair down and make up gone. Across the room, your galaxy dress and his heavenly white suit and usual hat hung up on hangers.
“Thank you…” you whisper, trying to wipe away the endless tears that were still flowing down your face. He pulled your hands away from your face and lightly kissed you. He led the way over to the bed, both of you quickly climbing in. You cuddled into his chest as he wrapped his arms around you. You closed your eyes. Listening to his heartbeat and steady breathing. One of his hand of claws raking through your hair. A rosy cheek pressed to the top of your head.
“Will you tell me what’s wrong?” He asked in a whisper. Your hands clutched his shirt. Embarrassed you couldn’t keep yourself. He turned his head to kiss your hair. “You don’t have to tonight. It’s been a long day. Tomorrow though?”
You don’t want to. You don’t want to face the feelings, to face him. Admit to him the truth that nothing you did was ever truly good enough. That you were a failure and tonight was further proof.
You backed up to tell him it was nothing. That you just got overwhelmed and were tired. To hide away this ugliness.
The look of concern caught you off guard though. He was unmasked. Vulnerable. Asking for you to be the same. He had been open about answering everything you had ever asked him, why couldn’t you do the same?
You couldn’t fail him.
You could be a failure in every other way but not for him.
You couldn’t fail him. Wouldn’t.
Slowly, you nod and echo, “Tomorrow.”
“Okay.” He returned his cheek to the top of your head squeezing you into him with both arms. His tail manifesting and wrapping itself around your closest lower leg. “I love you.”
You burrowed into his side again, your own arms securing him to you. You smiled, feeling his tail. “I love you too. Thank you, my star.”
Both of you quickly succumbed to sleep wrapped in each other’s embrace.
Neither of you believing you deserved the the other.
#hazbin hotel#lucifer morningstar#hazbin hotel lucifer#lucifer hazbin hotel#hazbin lucifer#lucifer magne#lucifer#lucifer morningstar x you#lucifer x reader#hazbin hotel adam#hazbin adam#hazbin hotel adam x reader#hazbin hotel adam x you#adam x reader#adam x you#writing#my writing#1-helluva-hazbin#ask#anon ask#lucifer x you#lucifer x y/n#adam x y/n#hazbin adam x reader#hazbin adam x you#hazbin hotel adam x y/n#hazbin adam x y/n
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looking way too much into episode 2
ok, to start things off, pomni's dream. it was, in fact, a dream about abstraction. and may i just say that pomni's voice actor really did a good job in showing pomni's fear using her voice
what ragatha says here is interesting, simply because it seems....out of character? she's being all sassy and stuff, so either pomni is a TERRIBLE judge of character, or....she thinks ragatha doesn't like her. which it would make sense for her to think that, considering she left her behind when kaufmo attacked.
but immediately after the dream sequence, we see ragatha come to check on pomni, showing actual interest in her and asking how she is. so she does actually like and care about pomni, or is at the very least she's doing a good job at pretending she does.
ragatha reassures pomni that there's no hard feelings, but it still doesn't look like pomni believes her. poor babey :(
aww, he does like bugs! how cute!
now we've got some religious imagery. caine is god, i guess.
oh, and jax likes violence. i'll talk more about why i think that is once we get to the actual violence.
the way he just rests his chin on gummigoo's back, that's so cute
knives. that is all.
what??? what the fuck is the figurine thing???
aww look at him he's so silly when he's trying to be helpful
ragatha has stuffing inside her confirmed
THE BACKROOMS
existential crisis time
hholy shit. no wonder goose said we weren't ready for him.
bucket
her ass is NOT a handyman
i love this whole scene. i wanna go in depth about it but there's not much i know how to say, i just like that she's trying to cheer him up
also funny gummigoo screenshot
seems like a pretty good time to talk about jax's desire for violence. this is still a video game, after all, and the way he's acting is pretty similar to how i sometimes play games; using it as a sort of "rage room" to destroy and vent my frustrations in. it would even be excusable if it weren't for the fact that the AIs are sentient.
now it's time to REALLY get talking
silly man with his head in a bucket. he mentions caine here, specifically that they can ask him for help, and it wouldn't be a stretch to say he may have asked caine for help with things in the past. which, while not very important or significant, does create a cute mental image. goofy little ringmaster being helpful.
what ragatha says here is SO important to her relationship with pomni. she thinks that pomni doesn't like her, while pomni thinks that ragatha doesn't like her. so they're basically stuck in a loop, a platonic "will they, won't they" where they both think the other hates them. this is the type of barrier that prevents a friendship from forming.
kinger is unexpectedly very wise in this scene, and gives her some good advice. this is the reason i think that ragatha will attempt to pursue a friendship with our little jester later on, only for pomni to be skeptical because she thinks ragatha's just being nice. and pomni's fear of ragatha secretly hating her is going to end up being the only thing that stops them from being friends.
it's also really sweet of her to immediately run up to her and check on her. i love these two :)
ok sorry for all the shipping propaganda let's get back to overanalyzing
this is what i wanted to mention the most. even though the NPCs see caine as a god, he's a bit of a cruel one. he has no regard for their well-being and only really cares about the humans. but i don't actually think it's his fault. he's an AI and he's programmed to care for the humans, so that's his priority, not the NPCs.
caine is described as being a "rouge AI", but i don't think that's the case....yet. i think he's actually going to go rouge as the story progresses, and eventually realize how unforgiving he's being.
anyways, i still want to talk about some other theories i have. hopefully there's still room for a couple more pictures in this post.
this line from jax in the pilot is my main base for this. obviously he's referring to the centipede he put in ragatha's room, but it's the fact that he says it right before he opens the door to reveal that kaufmo abstracted. no one in the circus knew he had abstracted until this point, nor did anyone mention seeing any signs that he was going crazy.
i think it's a hint. what's being insinuated here is that no one's going to know who will abstract next. there's no trick for for discovering the order they'll all abstract in, and there's no signs when it's going to happen.
(edit: i just remembered that kinger mentioned him acting weird but sshhhhhh it's still a good theory ok)
as for the void, when caine realizes pomni wandered out there, he mentions that she'll get "totally spoiled". i think this means that looking into the void gives you visions of the future, and that pomni knows how the show is going to end; she knows all the surprises and twists, too. it would explain why she looked so angrily at caine (possibly now knows about how little he cares for the NPCs), and also why she seems so lost in thought right at the end.
but hey, that's just a theory
A CIRCUS THEORY!!!
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Could I ask for a Crowe x f!reader who's always giggling at random stuff? I crave more content of him 💔
Risibility (Crowe x Giggly! Fem. MC/Reader)
Thank you for the ask Anon! I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I did writing it. ദ്ദി ˉ͈̀꒳ˉ͈́ )✧
Signed by biggest-geo-oogami-enjoyer
Risibility: the ability or inclination to laugh; the tendency to laugh often and easily.
—----------------------------------------------------------------------------
You are often described as jovial. Witty. Comedic.
That’s part of the reason Crowe started getting attached so fast.
When you first arrived at the school, Crowe deemed you as simply a very aggressively positive person, until he hung out with you more.
He honestly didn’t know what to make of the constant giggle fits you had, just seeing a random child fall over was enough to send you.
(Albeit that was pretty funny, he had to admit, although he’d feel too bad to admit it).
Sometimes he’d ponder whether you were laughing at him, or trying to not make fun of him.
When he asked you about it, all you did was nervously chuckle and shortly explain your ‘Laughinson’s’™️ to him.
You felt really bad after that, but he honestly found your constant giggling endearing.
He realised after a while he disliked the sight of you trying to stifle a smile or restrain yourself from laughing.
One of his friendship goals was to make you comfortable with almost asphyxiating from laughter with him. Your laughter was contagious.
It sounded lively, joyful, hopeful. He felt at ease whenever you were around.
There are times, however, where you giggle slightly too intensely, like the time a pigeon smacked into the window during Art History. You were laughing so hard you were starting to get concerned for your lungs, (he was honestly praying you wouldn’t die); hell, you were losing pallor and gasping for air 20 minutes after it happened! Your teacher and class started seeing you as both deranged and 'unique'.
Also, weirdly enough (is it really), even someone insulting you made you laugh (although he thinks it’s because it’s your main coping mechani-) to which he’d politely tell them to fuck off leave you be.
Crowe one day decided that even if you were stupidly a smidge coo-coo; he still lov- really liked you. If you start giggling, especially in class, he would research ways to try and help you calm down.
Then you try them.
Then they don’t work.
Then you try again, because Crowe, as he says: “I don’t care how long it may take, I can wait until death if it means you can do something that works for you”.
You also laugh when you’re stressed, as Crowe found out when you asked him for study notes the day before a massive literature exam. (He gave them to you dw, he even tutored you because he adores likes you so much).
Essentially you’re the ‘Chaotic Small x Chill Tall’ trope.
As the years go by, and he loses touch with you (not really but he gets busier you know), he starts to miss the constant background noise of you chuckling about something you did 2 hours ago.
Now, whenever he sees you, he relishes in the glorious sight of your smile, the ethereal glint in your eyes when you recall something you did, or your day.
You laughing or not, he’ll never get sick of seeing you grin.
So he decides to make it his mission to get a smile out of you every single day. No matter what.
—----------------------------------------------------------------------------
A/N: Laughinsons is now owned by me idc.
#the kid at the back#tkatb#reminder that geo is superior#crowe ichabod#jericho crowe ichabod#tkatb crowe#tkatb vn#tkatb x reader#i literally brained so hard holy shit#anyway enjoy anon!#imagine using the wrong word in the title holy fuck#i need to sleep more
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First of MANY Camp Green Hill Doodles. Camp Green Hill is my silly summer camp AU, and since I've been on a 06 kick lately, lots of silliness with that case running through my brian. Context and explanations under the cut <3
Alright! Camp Green Hill takes place at its namesake. It’s a pretty nice, isolated place in the middle of nowhere, and a safe haven for Mobians with or without ‘supernatural abilities’. Sonic is a permanent resident and under the care of Ranger (“Uncle”) Chuck, who is currently in charge of the camp. Onto the doodle explanations:
“Sonic the Hedgehog”: Just a little doodle of our resident hedgehog. He’s well known both around camp and around town for being bright, full of energy, and very competitive. He possesses a super speed ability and loves to let it show.
Sonic and Tails: Sonic and his little brother, Tails were found in the woods around the camp around 10 years ago. Their origins are pretty much unknown, and neither of them say anything about their old homes. It came to light that Sonic kidnapped Tails after keeping an eye on the toddler and noticing he was severely neglected by his community. Sonic’s origins remain unknown. Uncle Chuck speculates he also came from a neglectful family, which is why he took Tails and ran.
Drowning: Sonic cannot swim. Despite this, he hangs around water frequently, especially when pissed off or upset. This has resulted in many near drownings.
Uncle Chuck: Artists rendition of how Uncle Chuck became an uncle. Sonic just kind of wandered into the camp, decided he liked it and its weird owner (Chuck), and declared him their uncle.
Sonic Enjoys Rock Climbing: It's one of his favorite camp sports! He’s gotten pretty damn good, but for the sake of setting a good example, will make use of the safety equipment.
A Completely Normal Cat: A completely normal cat with a completely normal vibe who cannot talk, I promise. Just kidding, that's resident half god Mephiles! They prefer to take on the form of a cat most of the time, mostly to not throw other campers off. And yes, they are in fact, a camper. It's a long story. If you want to know more. My ask box is open ;)
Friendship Bracelets: Silver is buddies with Mephiles, but neither of them have been properly socialized. He and Blaze have matching friendship bracelets, so he made Mephiles one too. They wear it as a collar, since cat wrists aren’t the best for jewelry.
Lawn Chair: There's a little filler ‘episode’ where Silver, Sonic, Blaze, and Shadow all go to a waterpark outside of town, and Silver enlists the help of Meph to get them in, since they know a certain illusionist jackal who could help them out. They pretend to be Shadow’s older sibling to get them in, and hang out with Blaze far away from the splash zone.
They/Them Icon: Just a doodle of Meph I did to fill space lol.
Blaze and Silver: They have a long, complicated friendship. She appeared to him when he was younger shortly after losing his whole family to a catastrophic apartment fire. She’s a secret friend from another dimension, and his only real friend. Little does he know, Blaze was the one who accidentally started the flame, and now feels bad for orphaning him. She grapples with the guilt a lot. Meph was messing around in the future during the off season and accidentally befriended the two, which was their ticket to the past at the camp.
Also, Silver visits Blaze’s dimension frequently! Once he’s comfortable around people, he’s full of spunk, and loves a good adventure. He’s not as innocent and shy as he paints himself to be, not even by a lot. He’s still nervous around Mephiles though, given the whole ‘god’ thing.
#Sonic the Hedgehog#Sonic au#Sonic 06#Sonic the Hedgehog 2006#Miles Tails Prower#Uncle Chuck#Mephiles the Dark#They ain't so dark in this au though. they get a really neat arc and I'm excited to yap about it#Silver the Hedgehog#Blaze the Cat#Please ask me about this au I'm going insane#niko.jpeg#And appreciate the messy shading I was trying something new#Meph in the lawnchair and Sonic drowning and climbing are all semi shaded#Please reblog too I beg I need people to be interested in this au or I'll go insane its so special to me#my special little princess#okay rant over#Camp Green Hill
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YOU TASTE THE SILVER - IvanTill WIP (Part 9)
Guys, I don't normally post here unless I have at least another POV ready, but I'm gonna admit this last Ivan POV is NOT working out. I rewrote it three times, and it's still fighting me. Hopefully I can dig myself out of the ditch, but oh well. Y'all can enjoy Till's POV while I suffer.
ON AO3 - part one - part two - part three - part four - part five&six - part seven - part eight
Till's life is going well. He's used to the new house, he's found new inspiration to write and mix more songs ever since Mizi's concert, so he's going live more often, which means his audience has been growing steadily. Dewey got a promotion at work and Isaac is doing an EMT course that will guarantee him a promotion as well.
He's also started chatting more often with Navi, enough so that they are... almost friends? He doesn't want to assume, but Navi is always so happy to talk about anything Till wants that the conversation flows easily. Navi especially likes to know what Till is eating, all the boring details that Till finds himself... eager to share. Till has never been overly chatty, and idle conversation is awkward, but somehow Navi shows so much interest in what he has to say that Till finds himself invested in expressinging himself more, in looking for things to talk about.
Navi likes knowing what Till thinks of the weather, and actively engages with him over which brand of ramyeon is better. Somehow, they can get into discussions over the most innocuous thing, and end up discussing music and lyrics and mixing for hours on end.
They have an ongoing discussion about the use of english in lyrics, which frequently comes back up whenever one of them thinks of another argument, and also an untold pact of sending animal pictures to each other; Till sends pictures of any dog he sees on the street, because Navi said it's his favorite animal even if he can't have one, and Navi sends back cat pictures, since his sister has one and cat pictures are easier than snake ones, which are Till's favorite animal.
Till feels... warm, about it. He's never had many friends, being a lone wolf throughout his school years; he was always in detention, or going directly home after school. He'd always had a temper, something that only really cooled after he left school and was allowed to focus on music. Dewey was his brother, not his friend, and Hyuna was more of an acquaintance than a close friendship.
Till also felt. Guilty, maybe? About the amount of money Navi kept spending on him. He wasn't a friendship expert, but he was pretty sure friends didn't send you almost 50$ dollars when you complained about picking between ramyeon and tteokbokki and told you to pick both.
(Till knew it was a mistake to migrate over from texting to Kakaotext, since now Navi could send him money directly through that. But he also had to admit the amount of stickers Navi used was beyond cute.)
Navi had also sent him some other gifts, beyond the spontaneous kakaopay transfers and normal stream donations; he's sent Till a collection of rings after bothering Till for a week straight to give him his ring size, a comfy sweater that Till didn't take off for a week due to how soft it was, and so on.
Till felt a weird tingling feeling on his stomach, a blush taking over his face whenever Navi sent him anything. He's normally fine ignoring it after a token protest, too practical to actually deny money.
He thinks he should feel bad about it, or something. Dewey told him, a few weeks into his streaming career, that he'd feel awful about getting so much money and not giving it back. Till thinks it's an exchange; he streams and people give him money for entertaining them. For a little while, the same applied to Navi. Why should he care if someone wasted their money on Till? He didn't think gacha companies were at fault for people's spending habits.
That was until they started texting. That was until Navi stopped being just a name on the screen and became a person who liked dogs, did spicy challenges for fun and had strong opinions about the conservation of endangered animals.
Till thought he might start to feel guilty, then, or at least want to pay Navi back somehow.
Instead what he gets is a warmth throughout his chest and an entirely undignified urge to squirm in place. He likes it when Navi spends money on the most mundane things, when Navi tells him to get himself some food. When Navi sends him money with instructions to get something specific Till scrambles to get it, and enjoys the treat with red cheeks and an unknown tightness in his chest.
He doesn't get it, and he's too embarrassed to talk about it with anyone else.
(Reviewing the memory, later on, will show Till the following; the weird warmth, the urge to squirm, it is arousal. Till likes it a lot, when Navi gives him things and tells him what to do with it. He feels spoiled and taken care of and confusedly horny about it all.)
He's doing his best to not care much about it, but his weeks-long wave of good luck seems to have run dry, because he ended up sick some two days ago. He's had to cancel three streams already, and is miserable enough he's debating actually going to a doctor about it.
Luckily for him, he's not coughing or nauseous, which are his least favorite symptoms. He is congested and his nose is running all the time, and he does feel feverish, but there's not much he can do about that except sleep it off.
He's currently huddled into his couch, slowly eating the samgyetang Isaac made for him and watching a show Hyuna recommended. It's a simple, no-thoughts-necessary show; the female MC is a former yakuza member that's trying to leave her past behind and live as a teacher, and the two competing love interests are a big executive type who has a child on the school and is an ass to her but is able to afford a pretty luxurious life as long as she goes along with his plans, or a old member of the Yakuza who fell in love with her when he was a child and is now reforming himself to be able to stand besides her "in the light", as he put it.
Till is cheering on the yakuza guy, mostly because he's a lot sweeter than the asshole executive.
He's also live-blogging to Navi, who has been hovering so badly that Till gave up and allowed the other to get his actual address so Navi can buy him some soup and energy drinks. He thinks he'll regret it later, but he's not complaining right now, when Navi is making sure he has food delivered for every meal and also all the necessary meds.
You [ 5:47PM ]
Oh look, the asshole is going on a business trip. Maybe we'll get some good scenes with the yakuza guy now.
Navi [ 5:47 ]
You're really invested into this, aren't you? What do you even like in this character?
You [ 5:48PM ]
He's just so much better than the asshole. I don't get why girls would ever go for someone who's so rude to them.
Till huffs, looking up at the TV as the in-between episode extra starts. They're always funny, showing the behind the scenes and some interviews with the actors. He likes the main actress well enough, and by what he saw the actor for the asshole is a well-established star that he had no idea existed until now.
Well, the same can be said of the younger yakuza guy. His actor, someone named Ivan, is talking about how he prepared for the role, and Till can't help but be interested. The asshole guy only talked about his physical conditioning, but Ivan is talking about how he talked things over with the director, watched former-yakuza interviews and did his best to research about the motivations of his character.
He's also very handsome, in an endearing way, and Till can't help agreeing with the interviewer when she tells Ivan his fans will love the role, and that seeing him do such an earnest character will get all the girls swooning.
You [ 5:48PM ]
Also, seeing the interviews, this Ivan person is just a lot better than the other actor. He cares a lot more about his character, which I think is way more important than how you look.
The interview ends, and Till decides to send another commentary before getting up to fetch more tissues for his nose.
You [ 5:48PM ]
I bet Ivan would look cute doing aegyo. He's got the face for it, at least. Though I don't know if actors do that, I've only seen Idols do it on command.
Message sent, Till puts his phone to the side and gathers his little mountain for tissues and shuffles to the trash can, dumping them before refilling his water bottle and getting a new box before snuggling up again.
Navi still hasn't answered.
He frowns. He knows Navi can be busy, he definitely has other things to do rather than keep Till company, but he usually sends a BRB text if he'll be away from his phone for more than a minute.
He's still a little sick, and fervish, and miserable, so he doesn't think too hard about it and messages Navi again.
You [ 5:50PM ]
Navi?
Navi [ 5:51PM ]
Sorry, hyung. I just got surprised. My name is Ivan as well.
Till makes a little surprised noise. Ivan isn't that common of a name. What are the odds?
You [ 5:51PM ]
Wow, it must be weird to share names with someone famous.
Navi answers quickly, but with far poorer grammar than what Till is used to.
Navi [ 5:52PM ]
haha yeah well, I got used to it. do you like Ivan?
You [ 5:53PM ]
I haven't seen much besides this series, he seems pretty good. Did you have any recommendations?
Navi – or, well, Ivan. Till quickly goes to change his contact name before he forgets – takes some more time to answer, and Till decides he must be busy, so he puts the show back on, doing his best not to sneeze into his soup. It's only as he's almost napping that he gets a text.
Ivan [ 5:52PM ]
"Creating Heaven", "So long, not enough" and "Kamera" are tolerable, but hyung should watch some more and tell me what's your favorites!
Till is too sleepy to type, so he just takes a picture of himself giving thumbs up and snuggles back on his couch, Ivan-the-actor's soothing voice talking with the MC lulling him to a nice, dreamless sleep.
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I just hope you don’t come to regret it..
You can think of this comic as a part 2 to the UI leaking the rot comic. Please check it out! (x)
#rainworld#rain world#unparalleled innocence#grey wind#chasing wind#rw comic#my art#i can finally faint im so tired haha#this was alot of work#excuse any mistakes i might have made especially near the end#a lot of it was done quite late#anyway this has been on my mind for a while#grey knows how it feels to be misunderstood#so while everyone else takes UI’s silence as telling#grey decides to investigate what happened. and figured she judged her wrong#this is pretty much how their friendship starts!#UI is right by saying she has a short lifespan. by the time of riv shes gone#even pebbles with his intense rot was still standing#ill take a break and look into my inbox later today#thank you for the patience!#hope the comic is enjoyable
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Ateez AT AU Time!
Yeosang joins team Wooyoung, San and Yunho (unintentionally).
As mentioned in another post, San had been having crazy visions/dreams and Seonghwa had been a constant presence in the dreams, leading San to believe that they need to find this strange dream guy and go on some incredibly important quest. The running theory from the team was that they needed to find and slay The Beast (who is actually just Mingi) and that Seonghwa was somehow going to be some very powerful being that would help them.
Meanwhile Yeosang is just going around looking for Seonghwa who completely disappeared one day when Yeosang was asleep. Yeosang had pretty much never been apart from Seonghwa for more than 24 hours in the past 900 years, so it’s very stressful going from town to town asking people if they’d seen Seonghwa. He eventually ends up in a town at the same time Wooyoung and San are out looking for side quests. After seeing his picture of Seonghwa, Yeosang is dragged back to the woosanho treehouse.
Friendship is forged and this half of the group is formed!
#doodle doo#ateez#ateez at au#kang yeosang#yeosang#choi san#ateez san#san ateez#jung wooyoung#wooyoung#jeong yunho#yunho#the leader of this team is unofficially Wooyoung#Yunho San and Wooyoung all individually believe that They are the leader#but Wooyoung pretty much always wins when it comes to deciding things#Yeosang has no thoughts on the matter. he does voice how stupid some of their ideas are once he starts to actually accept their friendship#then Yeosang also thinks he should be in charge#this team is not very productive save for when fighting monsters and stuff#also inventor Wooyoung! important
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if there's anything i care about more than magical girls, it's magical women
#txt.mine#thinking about how much i love the niche cuz adult lifestyles have such a fun variety of moments to start a story with#and i feel like the balance of agency through life & work & purpose & desire can get skewed in suchh a good way#like. maybe some characters are unemployed or stuck in a dead-end job or unsustainable passion-project. maybe everyone's in the same career#it's just so fun to see ensembles with conflicting life-styles and watch how it goes when these people finally have a moment to talk again#or there's roommates who got scouted off the street then have to balance deeply contemporary problems and a patron who's passionate but also#needs proxies for material change [fighting monsters of the week]#anyway. im so sleepy#to the stories i am thinking of [magical girl friendship squad {youtube series}] [heaven will be mine {pc visual novel}] [life after magic#{pc visual novel. disclaimer that i havent finished lam yet; tho i started it on a whim & it's Pretty charming so far}]#i need to talk about these stories more. god i love when women are complicated & stuck in a strained community
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For some reason I had never listened to the high school ear biscuits episode and I am sobbing over this like they are just so truly in love with each other? Like platonically, romantically, whatEVER it is so obvious!!!! They chose each other so easily, almost subconsciously, over and over and being with each other forever was literally the default? To them it was always guaranteed? Like bitch I’m cryingggggg.
I also didn’t realize that the blood oath happened so late? Like they were around 16 years old making that kind of verbal commitment to each other? And having deep conversations about their futures together???
Link saying “I had this deeply rooted feeling, maybe even an attachment to our friendship” and talking about how the blood oath was validating for him because it made it “official” that Rhett prioritized him over everything and everyone else and then Rhett at the end saying that “There was something special between the two of us that eclipsed any other connection we had with other people” …
Like y’all…. My heart literally can’t take this 😭
#If they were opposite genders y’all KNOW this would have been framed so differently#they probably wouldn’t have even been allowed to spend as much time alone with each other as they did#but this is… I mean this is true love by definition#and you can tell that they both get a little emotional while talking about it#like this was honest to god their love story 😭#they make me feel insane#rhink#ear biscuits#rhett and link#also when link is going off about how much he loved what the blood oath meant for them and that he was always going to follow Rhett wherever#Rhett started fidgeting with his pointer finger ring#link’s not wearing his in the video but I’m pretty sure that by that point he had his?#so it had already been established that they basically had friendship rings by this point right?#I’m too lazy to go back and check#but if so….#that’s vvvv interesting body language there buddies
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BEST thing. about the five kingdoms end. is that it's implied cole and jenna aren't a thing thank god. brutal ending still but at least there's that.
#mullblogging#as i started typing this post i was hit with the thought of like the most unhinged fic about cole and jenna friendship breakup#bc of what happened with the outskirts. not like. the outskirts drove them apart.#the forgetting did.#here is someone you are closer to than pretty much anyone else in the world but as time goes on and as the forgetting occurs#you find yourself wondering: how did we become like this anyway? why are we so close? do we talk? did we?#what's the basis for this friendship?#and over time. you drift apart. you were bound by an experience that you can no longer recall.#it's like a fantasy version of the way all my middle school friendships ended.#good lord thids was suppose to be a mild hater post and now ive got demons
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I've been... Absolutely normal? After this breakup with the person that I really genuinely wanted to spend my life with.
It happened Friday night, I cried most of the night and a little on Saturday but then something just shifted and I've been like 99% fine and normally and happy since then? The only time the sadness has really hit me since has been thinking about how upset my (dying) grandma will be that she won't be able to know my partner. But otherwise? I got horrendously drunk on Saturday night, had tons of fun and was fine with a guy low-key flirting with me. Since I got thru the handover and sleepiness on Sunday I've been utterly normal, getting on with work, reading romance and enjoying it rather than being sad or jealous etc. The main stressor has been the number of deadlines I've had this week and trying to manage my parents' reaction and reassure them I'm fine.
It's not that I'm complaining I've not been truly and utterly crushed by the heartbreak, but I'm just weirded out by this reaction. I'm worried I'm bottling it all up and it'll explode later or that this is me sliding back into depression, but I'm still enjoying things and it doesn't feel like depression? Like have I actually reached that level of emotional maturity that I've dealt with everything (or most things) already?
He decided about a week ago that he didn't want to go through his early twenties having to factor someone else into his life plans. I understand it, I respect his decision, acknowledge that there's no use in trying to talk him out of it, appreciate the fact he told me as soon as he could in person so we ended the relationship still loving each other rather than growing apart and resentment building. I really can't stress how I've never loved or been loved by anyone like with him before and that he has been the most important person in my life for four years. Accepting that the life we were planning together has gone has seemed to happen so easily and it feels like something must therefore be wrong. It's helped that we haven't seen each other in person and haven't currently got plans to I guess because I think it's going to really hit when I can't be physically affectionate like before. But even with the distance I still just can't understand why I'm feeling so nothing about this. He brought up that he might want to break up in March and I cried far more than this. Have I been emotionally checked out of the relationship since then without realising? Am I just bottling stuff up without realising? I just wish I knew
#im very used to being alone#even during the relationship we were long distance for most of it and i was living by myself or with emotionally distant family#and last month i moved in with 3 friends and with uni starting I'm able to socialise more even though i still prefer to be alone a lot#so maybe its the fact that i dont feel so isolated that's helping?#even when we lived together i only really had my now ex around to turn to for friendship#also with university im so so overworked but it gives me structure#so im with friends and have a purpose#which is maybe whats holding me together#i think i did process a lot of this after we nearly broke up in march#i said to him months ago that I ultimately want him to be happy and if he decides that its not with me then ill hate it but accept it#i am also on a lot of adderall lmao#switched prescriptions today#anyway even if im slightly scared everything is going to explode out of me one day#i am still proud with how im handling this#i could have been so vindictive during the break up but i knew thatd only hurt him and that i dont want him to be upset#so i wasnt#there were a couple of times i said stuff that i could have left unsaid like how i had our anniversary card already written and in our desk#and i think part of me did want him to hurt at that but mostly because i wanted him to see how much i was? still petty I know#but also i think I'm allowed a bit of pettiness when im being dumped pretty much out of nowhere#idk man#its not bad necessarily its just weird#we said we'd talk on the weekend so the first convo post break up wouldnt become a Thing of who would blink first or whatever#and i want him to know im alright but i don't want it to seem like im bragging or that it means the relationship meant nothing to me#like hey I've lost the most precious thing we had together and actually it seems im fine without it#i really really hope hes feeling a similar way#our friend and my housemate went to visit him yesterday so hopefully hes let him know im coping fine so he doesnt have to feel guilty#i dont want him to be alone in a new house full of strangers and heartbroken#ive been telling our mutual friends to look after him and saying they really really really shouldnt take sides or anything in this#and i dont like thinking of him being sad and knowing there's absolutely nothing i can do rn to help other than giving him space#rambles
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Randomly started thinking about Fairy Tail after all this time and all of the things wrong with it and how all of the other guilds are just Fairy Tail with a different coat of paint and I'm two seconds away from writing self indulgent fix it fics because good lord
(I'm mainly talking about post-Tenrou cause that's where most of my criticisms are. I have very few complaints about pre-Tenrou cause those arcs slap)
#fairy tail#this is coming from someone who watched the shit out of it#i hadn't watched the anime in so long but best believe i tuned in for that last episode#i started sobbing when snow fairy started playing#but anyway it's the way that the series was too scared to keep characters evil and/or perma kill them#like i think only 5 PEOPLE died in this entire franchise pre-100 year quest#only 3 people deserved redemptions imo and for some reason more than those 3 people got redemptions#i also wish the guilds had different dynamics because when it comes down to it they're all pretty much the same#blue pegasus is just fairy tail but with ouran high school host club mixed into it#lamia scale is fairy tail but snake themed#mermaid heel is fairy tail but with lesbians#sabertooth is fairy tail but they're assholes who eventually become fairy tail 2.0 because they got a power of friendship pep talk#you could tell me the other guild characters were part of fairy tail and i wouldn't question it that's how similar they are#anyway gonna write about sting and rogue leaving sabertooth cause their boss was homophobic (canon tbh) and they become mercenaries
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bahaha singles inferno is getting spicy lololol soeun is my queen I love her she's very down to earth and friendly and chill I love that for her. I wasnt really feeling seulki but I've come to like her more and more with each ep tho not a big fan of how the men keep choosing her but that's not her fault so 🤷 and so e love her v much but it's time to move on from yoongjae maybe the new guy will help lololol the new girl is also really cute. and sejeong is just chilling there but no guy is looking at her like BRUH 😭😭😭 I love her so much is date me instead. Am not taking any of this seriously lol it's all fun to speculate and watch
#bro i love how theyre including more casual interactions and stuff bc i value that more personally#also really like hanbin and so e's friendship I actually was rooting for them as a couple at the start just visually surface level wise#but this is good too!!#i really like soeun and yoongjae but i dont want hanbin to turn into last season's sehoon so please please dont turn#i feel like after soeun found out his age she wasnt feeling it anymore#which is valid#i do like them as a couple too tho#but i think yoongjae and soeun are better#seulki and jinyoung have good chemistry their date was enjoyabme to watch haha#yall it makes sense why dongwoo basically friendzoned nadine after finding out her age and position like#(1) theres a pretty significant age gap and (2) they're at much different stages in their careers in medicine its just not really a vibe#(3) i just kinda find it weird how people are saying that's ared flag when it makes sense#plus her life is going get hella busy shes smart and amazing fr but i think that theyre at such different stages in life and industry#thats its not really appropriate#singles inferno#singles inferno 2#singles inferno s2
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