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schrodingerspsycho · 5 months

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I Just Want You To Be Happy - Chapter 1

Pairing - Taissa Turner x Van Palmer x Reader

Warnings - None

Word Count - 4.1k

Summary - With her life in shambles, Taissa seeks solace in the only place she knows, but everything changes when she finds out that Van isn't alone.

Author's Note - 2021 timeline. Also Van doesn't have cancer :)

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Taissa smoothed out her hair and took a deep breath, summoning the courage to open the door. The bell chimed and she glanced around, and after a moment her eyes landed on the redheaded woman behind the counter. She was just as beautiful as Tai remembered, her scars fainter and her blue eyes brighter than the last time they saw each other. Their eyes met, and a look of recognition and disbelief dawned on the woman’s face.

“Tai?”

“Hey, Van.”

It was as if time had stood still, and she could tell that Van felt it too. And despite all the chaos in her life, Tai felt a sense of calm seeing Van again after all these years.

“Babe, did you want to put out this new shipment now, or wait until- oh.”

The moment shattered when you walked out through the beaded curtain. You, a gorgeous woman with shining eyes and graying hair, wearing a flannel shirt that Tai knew was Van’s. You immediately clocked the tension in the air and put a comforting hand on Van’s shoulder, leaning in to whisper something to her. She turned to you and smiled softly, a look that had once been reserved only for Tai. Her head began to spin, and when Van turned back to her, her voice sounded muffled and far away. She stumbled forward, and just as she tried to reach out for something to hold onto, her vision went black.

When she came to, Tai found herself in a new yet familiar bedroom. Van’s bedroom. Your bedroom. She walked out slowly, as if in a trance, and found you and Van standing in the living room, talking in hushed voices. Then you glanced up and saw her, and your face lit up with a friendly smile. “She’s awake.”

Van turned to her with an unreadable expression, her eyebrows pinched together in that adorable way that Tai both loved and hated. “Tai,” she said, sounding strained. Then she gestured to you. “This is my partner, Y/N. Y/N, this is Taissa.”

“It’s nice to meet you,” you said, giving her a small wave. Taissa could only nod.

“So, are you gonna tell me why you’re here, or are we just gonna pretend this isn’t super weird? I mean, it’s been a long time. A really fucking long time.”

Taissa looked away, unable to make the words leave her throat. Van’s gaze softened slightly.

“It’s happening again, isn’t it? The sleepwalking?”

Tai smiled, big and bright and fake, and made finger guns at Van. “I got you something,” she said, walking over to her purse. She pulled out the pen she’d bought from the trucker and clicked it nervously as she approached. She chuckled as she handed it to Van, who smiled as she reached for it.

“Holy shit,” she breathed as she inspected it. “I can’t believe they still make these.”

“Yeah, you remember when we swapped that fancy guest book pen for one of those at Shauna’s wedding?”

“Yeah. Mrs. Taylor almost had a stroke. I can see her bosoms!” She turned the pen over with a look of bewilderment, holding it out for you to watch as the ink drained away to reveal a naked woman. You and Van laughed at the same time, and Tai couldn’t tell whose voice was whose. “Oh my god,” Van said, locking eyes with you. Tai’s smile faded.

Then Van looked back at her, all levity replaced with concern. “So,” she asked, her voice low. “How bad is it?”

Tai didn’t answer.

“I’m gonna go back down to the store, and give you two some time to talk,” you chimed in, smiling reassuringly at Van. You placed a hand on the small of her back and she reached out to stroke your side, nodding.

“Okay,” she agreed, and you leaned in and kissed her. It was a comfortable, loving kiss, one you had clearly shared countless times. Tai’s stomach twisted into a knot.

“Alright, come on,” Van sighed once you left the room. She sat down on the couch and gestured to the spot next to her, her eyes never leaving Tai. “Sit down and tell me all about it.”

So Taissa did just that. It was difficult at first, but Van was patient and understanding like always, and eventually, she shared all the things that had been haunting her for the past few weeks. It felt good to finally open up, and Van was the only person who could make her do it. They fell right back into the rhythm they’d had as teenagers, and if she tried hard enough, Taissa could pretend that nothing had changed.

“Well, what now?”

“Well, um, first I was hoping I could take a shower.”

“I’m serious.”

“Well, so am I. I just hitchhiked across Pennsylvania. I do not smell great,” Tai laughed. She knew that Van would see through the deflection, but if she didn’t laugh, she knew she would cry.

“Alright,” Van agreed after a moment. “I’ll get you a towel and some clothes.”

“Okay, thank you.”

Van stood up from the couch and stretched, and Tai stayed there with her knees held to her chest for a few seconds longer. Then she got up and followed Van into her bedroom, leaning uncertainly in the doorway.

“So, you and Y/N. How did that happen?” Tai asked, with her best attempt at casual conversation.

“We met on a dating app,” Van said dismissively, not looking up from the dresser.

“I never took you for the online dating type,” Tai commented. “How long have you been together?”

“A little over five years.”

“Wow, five years. That’s a long time.” Tai tried to ignore the aching in her chest. “So, are you living together, or…?”

“Yeah, we are,” Van sighed. “They moved in three years ago, a few months after they started working at the store. And you should be grateful because they’ve got some clothes that are more your style.” She held out a stack of towels and clothes, with a black turtleneck on top that Van wouldn’t be caught dead in.

“A-are you sure? Shouldn’t you ask-?”

“They won’t mind,” Van snapped tiredly. Taissa took the clothes, feeling dejected, and followed Van into the bathroom. “You can use any of the soaps and shampoos we have in there. I’m gonna help Y/N close the store, and then we’ll be back up. We can talk more about what to do then.”

“Thank you, Van,” Taissa said, and Van nodded. She started to walk away, but Tai called out before she could reach the stairs. “Wait! How much does Y/N know about me? About… us?”

Van scoffed. “Enough,” she said darkly. “They know enough.”

And just like that, Taissa was left alone.

When Taissa left the bathroom, she heard Van’s laughter coming from the kitchen. It was loud and joyous, just like she remembered, and she couldn’t help but smile. But then the kitchen came into view, and her smile faltered when she remembered who was making Van laugh. You were standing at the stove with your arm around her waist, and she leaned into you as she reached for a tomato. You said something else to her and she laughed again, bumping you with her hip, and you pulled her in for a kiss. Tai knew she shouldn’t watch, but she couldn’t bring herself to turn away. Maybe she was punishing herself for all the decisions that had led her here, so many of them rash and wrong. Or maybe she was just trying to remind herself of reality. Van was taken now, and so was she. She had a wife. Taissa fiddled with her wedding ring and stared as you and Van grinned at each other, exchanging words Taissa didn’t need to hear to understand.

“Taissa, hey!” you called cheerily when you spotted her. Van’s face fell when she turned to Tai, giving her a brief glare before grabbing a knife and focusing on slicing the tomato. “Figured you’d be hungry, so we’re making dinner a little early. I hope you like veggie burgers!”

“Oh yeah, I love them,” Tai said with a weak smile.

“Great! They should be done in about ten minutes.”

“Do you guys need any help, or-”

“No, we’ve got it.” Van didn’t even look up from the cutting board.

“Just sit down and make yourself at home,” you smiled. If you picked up on Van’s unease, you didn’t show it. Taissa wanted to believe that you couldn’t.

She sat down at the small table and waited, trying not to watch the two of you as you cooked. Everything was so domestic, and if she weren’t seeing it unfold before her very eyes, she wouldn’t have been able to picture Van in such a settled and tranquil space. Of course, this was what Van had wanted all along, she remembered. She just hadn’t been there for it.

“Alright, dinner is served!” you exclaimed as you took the burgers out of the pan. Tai got up and you handed her a plate, nodding to the toppings Van had set up on the counter. Van dished out a generous helping of french fries for her as she dressed her burger.

“Thank you for dinner, both of you,” Taissa said sincerely as she went to sit down. “This food looks amazing.”

“Of course,” Van replied with a tight-lipped smile.

“What can I get you to drink?” you asked her. “We have Mountain Dew, Dr. Pepper, beer… babe, what else do we have?”

“I’ll just have some water, please,” Taissa answered before Van could respond. You nodded and filled a glass for her, and she thanked you again. Van grabbed a beer for herself and turned to you, and at the slightest shake of your head, she handed you a Dr. Pepper.

Once her hosts were seated, with you across from her and Van between you, Taissa finally dug into her food. And you were right, she was hungry. She wasn’t sure how many hours it had been since she’d eaten. But even if she had just finished a full-course meal, she wouldn’t be able to deny that this was the best veggie burger she’d ever tasted.

“Oh my god, this is delicious,” she said, speaking around the bite in her mouth.

“Thank you,” you smiled, and Van grinned at you proudly. “The secret is to use Havarti cheese.”

“And don’t forget about your special seasoning recipe,” Van said. “That’s the real key to these things.”

“Well, yes, but I can’t divulge all my secrets,” you replied playfully. “I would lose my air of mystery.”

“Well, whatever it is, it’s amazing,” Tai said genuinely. You and Van both smiled at her.

“So, Taissa, have you ever been to Pennsylvania before?” you asked. Tai shook her head.

“I’ve driven through it a few times, but I’ve never stayed anywhere.”

“In that case, we’ll have to give you a tour around town one of these days. Show you all the best spots.”

“I’d like that.”

“Oh yeah, Y/N’s a great tour guide,” Van said. “They know this town like the back of their hand.”

“Yep, born and raised,” you said proudly. “Van had lived here for years before we met, and she still didn’t know half of the best places.”

“It helped you keep date nights interesting,” Van shrugged, a mischievous smirk on her face.

“That’s ‘cause you weren’t that hard to impress,” you fired back. She laughed, and you gazed at her adoringly. Tai took another bite of her burger.

After that, the conversation became stunted and awkward, with you putting in more work than Tai and Van combined. Despite the tension, you were a perfect host, and Tai had to admire that. Once everyone had finished eating you stood up and gathered the dishes. Van tried to help you, but you snatched the plate from her hand and planted a quick kiss on her forehead. She shot you an annoyed glance but opted to take another sip of her beer instead of protesting.

“Let me help you with the dishes,” Taissa said as you turned on the sink.

“Oh, you don’t have to do that. You’re our guest.”

“I showed up unannounced and you took me in. I insist.”

“Well, alright then,” you smiled, handing her the sponge.

Van sighed. “God dammit. I think I left my phone down in the office. I’m gonna go get it.”

“Okay,” you nodded, giving her a reassuring glance. The two of you shared a look, but Van had disappeared down the stairs before Taissa could decipher what it meant.

“Is she okay?” Tai asked.

“Just a little overwhelmed, I think.”

“I hope my being here isn’t upsetting either of you. I really don’t want to impose.”

“Oh no, don’t worry about it. We’re happy to help.”

“Are you sure? I can get a hotel room-”

“Nonsense.” The look on your face made Tai wish the floor would open up and swallow her. “I know the history you have with Van. Some of it, at least. And we are going to do everything we can to help you. You can stay as long as you need.”

You fell into silence after that, slowly falling into a rhythm as Tai handed you the freshly washed dishes for you to dry. She hated to admit it, but your presence was oddly comforting. She knew it had to be the sleep deprivation, but the calm was welcome nonetheless.

“Turns out I remembered to get my phone at just the right time,” Van said, coming up the stairs just as you were putting the final dish back in the cabinet. “Guess who got ahold of her mom’s phone.”

“Oh no, did April call you?” you chuckled, smiling at her. Van nodded.

“What did she want?”

“Oh, the usual. She told me about her hamster’s day and asked when she could come and stay with us again. And last week at a sleepover she discovered Mary Poppins and she asked if I had seen it.” Van grinned at you as you laughed, walking over to stand at her side. Tai couldn’t remember the last time she’d seen Van this happy.

“What’d you tell her?”

“That I love that movie. Then she asked if we had it at the store and if we could watch it the next time she visits. I think she really wants to spend another weekend with us.”

“Oh, you think?” you joked, putting your arms around her shoulders. “What we need to do is give that kid a VCR. I’ve never seen someone so fascinated by VHS tapes, and I live with you.”

“Yeah, maybe when she’s old enough for me to know she won’t break it.”

“Oh, c’mon. She wouldn’t break it if Aunt Vanny told her not to. You know you’re her favorite.”

“Yeah, right,” Van chuckled as she pulled you in for a kiss. Then she sighed, and you furrowed your brow in concern at the same time Taissa did.

“What’s wrong?” you asked her softly.

“Nothing. It’s just, y’know… when your sister took her phone back-”

“Oh no, what did she say?”

“That I look really tired and stressed out, and I should try one of her meditation techniques. I love that woman, but the word ‘tact’ is not in her vocabulary.”

“Yeah, you’re telling me,” you scoffed, hugging Van tightly.

After a few moments, Taissa cleared her throat, and you pulled back and gave Van a cheeky grin.

“Tai,” Van sighed, as if she’d forgotten she was there. Or as if she wished she wasn’t.

“Who called?” Tai asked, acting as though she hadn’t heard your whole conversation.

“April, my niece,” you answered. “Apparently she got ahold of my sister’s phone.”

“She’s around Sammy’s age,” Van said, and a shiver ran down Tai’s back at the mention of her son. “And speaking of, we need to figure out what we’re doing here so you can get back to him. I mean, did you have any semblance of a plan when you showed up here?”

“No, I… I hadn’t really… thought that far ahead,” Taissa said weakly. “I-I have no idea what to do.”

Van sighed, and you rubbed her arm comfortingly. “Okay, well, then let’s brainstorm. ‘Cause I don’t think what we did last time is gonna work again.”

“I’m not asking you to do what we did last time.”

“Then what do you expect me to do, Tai?” Van cried exasperatedly, stepping toward her. “Look, I get that you need help. But I have a life, and I can’t just put everything on hold because you decided to come up here and drop your fucking anvil on me out of the blue!”

“Van,” you said, your voice steady. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes.

“I’m sorry. That was uncalled for. I just-”

“No, you’re right,” Taissa interrupted. “I shouldn’t have come here.”

“Oh, fuck you, dude. Don’t make me convince you to let me help you. You know I’m not letting you leave here like this, so at least you could have the decency to actually ask for my help.”

Tai turned to face Van, the meltdown brewing inside her evident in her eyes. “I killed my fucking dog, Van. My wife is in the hospital. I’m losing my fucking mind, and I’m terrified! Like all the way. Like I haven’t been since… I can’t ask you for your help, ‘cause I don’t want to hurt any more of the people I love! God, what have I done?” she sobbed, putting her head in her hands.

“Hey. Look, we’ll figure it out,” Van said softly, stepping closer and rubbing her back. “Come on. We’ll figure this out.” She opened her arms and Tai buried her head in her shoulder, clutching desperately at her sleeve. Van held her and stroked her hair as she cried. Then she looked up and met your gaze, a sad look in her eyes.

“I’m sorry,” Tai sniffed when she finally stopped crying. “I-I shouldn’t have… I shouldn’t… I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay,” Van breathed, still rubbing her back.

“Why don’t we all just take a breather?” you said calmly. “We can worry about coming up with a plan tomorrow, once we’re all rested and in a better headspace. We can watch a movie, I’ll make tea and popcorn. How does that sound?”

Van turned to Tai, who nodded feebly. She couldn’t muster a verbal response. She could barely look you in the eye. She hadn’t felt this drained in years.

“Yeah, that sounds good.”

“Okay,” you smiled, and Van gave you a grateful look.

“Come on, you can choose the movie,” she said, leading Tai to the stack of tapes by the TV as you made your way to the kitchen. “You can look at the ones down in the store too, if you want.”

Tai welcomed the distraction and quickly found her favorite movie in Van’s collection. Well, what her favorite movie used to be.

Van woke up hours later to the sound of static coming from the TV. She turned it off and looked to see both you and Taissa asleep on either side of her. She pushed your head off of her shoulder gently and stumbled up from the couch, making her way into the kitchen for a glass of water. Then she felt a hand grab her shoulder and she spun around, and suddenly Taissa was kissing her. Through her sleepy daze, she recognized that this was wrong, but she couldn’t find it in herself to stop it.

“Whoa, Tai,” she gasped when she finally pushed away. Then she saw the dark look in Taissa’s eyes. “Oh, you’re the other one, aren’t you?” she murmured. Taissa nodded slowly, bobbing her head in a mesmerizing circular motion. “What do you want?”

“This isn’t where we’re supposed to be,” she rasped, beginning to walk away. Van stood there, baffled, trying to make sense of what just happened. Then she realized that Taissa was approaching you, and alarm bells began going off in her head.

“Hey, hey. No no no. No! Taissa!” Van leapt into action, dashing to the couch as fast as she could. But Taissa got to you first and slammed her hands onto your shoulders, startling you awake. She was gripping you hard, and Van saw your eyes fill with fear as she leaned in.

“You,” she growled. You whimpered.

“Don’t fucking touch them!” Van shouted, shoving Tai away and planting herself in front of you. She glared at Tai as she woke back up, her eyes darting between you in horror.

“Oh god, what did she do? What did I do?”

“Just don’t, Taissa.”

“Van, I’m so sorry. I-”

“Fucking. Don’t.”

You grasped Van’s hand from behind her and relief washed over her. But she couldn’t let her guard down just yet.

“We’re going to bed,” Van said, her voice gravelly. “We’ll discuss this in the morning. Get some sleep, Taissa.”

She turned and helped you to your feet, ignoring Taissa’s muffled sounds of protest. Once you were in your bedroom she locked the door and turned to you, worried tears in her eyes. “Are you okay?” she asked, placing a hand on your chest.

“I’m fine,” you reassured her, covering her hand with your own. “Are you okay?”

“Did she hurt you?” Van said, her voice pleading.

You shook your head. “No. No, she didn’t hurt me.”

“Oh, thank god,” Van gasped, pulling you into a tight hug. She always knew that her past would come back to haunt her, but she had hoped that she would be able to protect you. But now her worst fears were starting to come true, and she felt just as helpless as she had back then. “I’m so sorry, Y/N.”

“Hey, come on. You have nothing to apologize for. You know that.”

“No, I do,” she insisted. “I’m the reason she’s here. I knew how dangerous she could get, and I just let her-”

“Van-”

“-I shouldn’t have made you deal with her, this is my mess-”

“Van!” you exclaimed, finally getting her attention. “It’s okay,” you said softly as you tucked her hair behind her ear, your fingers brushing gently against her scars. “I’m okay. We’re okay.”

“I can’t bear the thought of you getting hurt by this,” Van croaked.

“Give me a little credit. I can handle myself just fine,” you chuckled. “You don’t need to worry about me. You told me everything I needed to know about Taissa’s sleepwalking, and I told you I was okay with her staying here. I’m not going to shun her for something she can’t control. And she’s your friend. We have to help her.”

“You know she was more than just my friend,” Van said with a pained expression.

“I do. I know that.” You wrapped your arms around her shoulders. “And that’s why she came to you for help. She wouldn’t have if she had anywhere else to go.”

“She tried to kiss me,” Van blurted. “Before she… woke you up.”

“Oh,” you said quietly. “Okay.”

“Okay? What do you mean, okay? It’s not okay!”

“You’re right, it’s not. But she didn’t know what she was doing. And I’m not angry or jealous if that’s what you’re worried about,” you smiled. “Look, we’re gonna get through this together. Just like we always do. I take care of you and you take care of me, right?”

“Okay,” Van sighed. “But if she so much as touches you again, she’s staying at a hotel.”

“Whatever you say, baby” you grinned, kissing her cheek and pulling her into another hug. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” she murmured into your chest. “So much.”

“Let’s get some sleep, hmm?” you breathed, slowly rocking her from side to side. Van nodded.

Once you were both ready you crawled into bed, and Van wrapped her arms around you tightly. “You’re too good, you know that?” she mumbled as you nuzzled into her neck. “You’re too good for all my bullshit.”

“Maybe. But your bullshit gives me something to do,” you smirked. Van laughed.

“Well, you’ve sure got a busy schedule now.”

“I wouldn’t have it any other way. And you know how much I hate being bored.”

Van rolled her eyes and kissed you, passionate and gentle. She could feel your heart beating, and the sound grounded her like it always did. Taissa coming back into her life had thrown her mind into utter turmoil, but she knew that with you by her side, she could handle anything. You really were too good for her, but she’d be damned if she was ever letting you go.

#taivan x reader #van palmer x reader #taissa turner x reader #taivan #taissa turner #van palmer #other tai #yellowjackets #yellowjackets fanfic #fanfic #ijwytbh

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deerlottie · 5 hours

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OKAY, SO, I DON'T THINK ANYONE HAS ASKED THIS BUT- HCS of proposing to the yjs? Like, would they propose or would reader propose. Also, how they would do it dhhshdhan

lottie: FOR SUREEEE she would be the one proposing. i think she'd try sooo hard to be subtle, but you know in an instant because she's so fucking nervous 😭 also didn't hide the ring that well...it'd be on a trip to greece - idk the first thing that came to mind was a little sunset picnic by the beach near ur hotel, little makeout session which turns into her getting emotional and pulling out the ring. she'd go on a monologue for like 10 minutes about how lucky she is to have met you and be with you and wake up every day to kiss you :( I feel like she'd just love a quaint little wedding with all your guys' friends and some family. doesn't have to be huge but if that's something you want, shes more than happy to oblige.

jackie: YOU WOULD! her ass would be dropping hints that she's ready for marriage and would get SO excited when you make up the worst lie when you're going with shauna to go ring shopping LMFAO. you have to wait until she forgets about it because she's on edge Every Day. i think she'd LOVE the attention if you do it in public... telling her you wanna go on a simple walk and she starts to realize you're taking her to where you guys went on your first date :( proposing to her at the exact table you sat at too 😭😭 ohh she'd be a mess. it'd take her like 5 mins to stop crying and say yes.

shauna: she would!!!!! this is probably cliche and corny as hell but i can't stop thinking about her saying she bought you a book because it reminds her of you and when you open it, inside is a poem she wrote about how she feels about you :( she includes lines from her favorite books and at the end of poem is "please say yes." you're confused but she tells you to flip to the last page and there's a ring. she's holding her breath for what seems like forever until you say yes and shes so happy :(( tbh i can see her just wanting to get married secretly and the girls finding out about it when they see that huge ass ring she got you.

nat: you'd propose. but i could also see her being kind of upset she can't afford an actual ring for you so she gets you like a ring from one of those quarter machines or some shit 😖😭 but its soo sweeet. she actually pours her little heart out and maybe cries a little...(she'll kill u if u mention this to anyone) but as for you, a simple dinner proposal is just fine. doesn't even have to be fancy - it could be a pizza shop you two frequent a lot and she'd be content. you'd do it in such a cheesy (no pun intended) way tho 😭 "accidentally" dropping your fork and asking her to pick it up for you and when she's bent down, that's where you place the ring on her plate. she scoffs but she's so enamored >__< will also flaunt that ring like there's no tomorrow!!!!

taissa: she would :P she told you very early on in ur relationship that you shouldn't even THINK about proposing because she's gonna be the one to do it. im such a sucker for halloween/christmas themed proposals so im imagining her doing it with christmas lights and ur too busy staring at how pretty she looks to notice the letters spelling out something when you help her put them up. thinking of the word "you" not lighting up properly so it just spells out "will marry me?" and you're like HUH!!!!! but ofc you say yes, and she gets you the most jaw-droppingly gorgeous ring ever that matches with a necklace she bought for herself :(

van: they would!!!! im obsessed with the idea of them doing it in a movie theater 😭 using their connections to have it display "y/n, will you marry me?" during the end credits of a movie you went to go see. and you HATE staying for the credits, so it takes a Lot of begging from van to get you to sit ur ass back down. the lights turning into a warm red color and van's VIBRATING beside you with a huge grin on their face as their message pops up. Trust that the ring box would be themed to fit your guys' favorite movie like the little nerd they are.

misty: oh, she would...if it was acceptable, she would've proposed one week into your relationship. caligula would 100% be involved. when you arrive at misty's house, caligula is carrying a note in her beak telling you to meet misty at the park. you walk around with her for a while and feed the ducks with her until she takes you by this totally not suspicious guy who's playing romantic songs on his guitar, which definitely sounds like ur favorite song....she gets down on her knees dramatically before proposing 😭

#.myworks #yellowjackets thoughts 💭#yellowjackets x reader #lottie matthews x reader #jackie taylor x reader #natalie scatorccio x reader #shauna shipman x reader #taissa turner x reader #van palmer x reader #misty quigley x reader

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tabithatwo · 7 months

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i have kindve a rant abt jackie that id like your thoughts on. whenever people write fics where jackie is like. wholly a dumbass it really irks me. like the most we see of her is in the wilderness, of course shes useless?? shes a normal person, she wasnt trained in survival tactics. theres another rant in there abt how she very much could have adapted but she was depressed and suicidal and i think thats mostly why shes useless, but thats a conversation for another time! but yeah. when shes just ditzy and shit in fics it really rubs me the wrong way. like i follow the hc that shes autistic, and specifically the kind where shes very socially aware but still sometimes fucks up a little. like how usually when shes mean she has no idea that it came off that way. i feel like people took that and twisted it to mean that shes some useless moron thats constantly oblivious and needs to be babied. i hope that made some sense? idk, im just curious if thats something other people have noticed and have a problem w or if im too personally offended by it lmao

Here is part 2 that anon sent separately!

Honestly anon fucking preach lol, that’s my thoughts on it!! I don’t think you phrased anything mean, I get the passion behind it comes from an important place! I tend to really bristle at any women being portrayed as stupid, even when it’s done in a cutesy (read: patronizing lol) manner.

NOW I can get behind a one liner joke like “aww she’s so stupid” about any of the yjs bc they ALL have their dumb moments, usually around EMOTIONAL intelligence! But I know what you’re talking about and I’ve seen it too—portraying her or describing her as likable but fucking dumber than a rock is honestly more annoying to me than the evil genius mastermind take most of the time.

It isn’t supported by anything we have of her character. There’s even a BIG point made with Shauna’s hallucination of her, where Shauna recognizes this sort of unfair impulse to jump to diminishing Jackie’s intelligence. I think that shauna simply feels like she needs one thing that’s just hers, one thing that she’s better at, and in her mind intelligence is the only option. But even she recognizes that’s bullshit. I think that yes shauna is framed as more book-smart than Jackie (honestly shauna is framed as the most book-smart, probably tied with Taissa) but we actually know very little of Jackie’s academic achievement, so it’s sort of up in the air.

But as far as day to day intelligence, I don’t think we’re meant to think Jackie is stupid. If anything, I think the lack of woods participation (which, as you said, is fucking depression and suicidality and fear) can be interpreted negatively as laziness, if one is inclined to interpret it negatively, or a fear of failure, more so than stupidity.

To each their own, I don’t think sort of notably off characterization is malicious unless the person is being cruel about it, but yeah I get annoyed and tend to click away lol and I do think there’s a lot lot lot of misogyny that infiltrates some popular jackie takes.

#yellowjackets #jackie taylor #shauna shipman #asks answered #jackieshauna

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star-girl69 · 11 months

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Ultraviolence

Natalie Scatorccio x Fem!Reader

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a/n: exams are crazy these next few days so expect delays in chapters 💔 but i hope you all enjoy!!

warnings: murder, death, blood, knives, mentions of drugs (shrooms), kissing, mentions of sex, swearing, tell me if i missed anything!!

Chapter Eighteen - Everything

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2021-

Shauna called you early in the morning when you had just gotten on the road, your Starbucks in your cup holder, and you had almost considered not answering it. The hunt was over, and you wanted to go home, and go back to your boring life as a Whole Foods cashier.

You wanted to go back to the normalcy you had worked so hard to make yourself accept- and this short little trip would have to be enough for the rest of your life.

Shauna had called, and she had sounded so scared, talking about her murdered lover, and at first- you really didn’t believe her. But, you turned around anyways, heading back towards the address she had sent you.

You met up with Taissa and Natalie in the parking lot, where in the elevator Taissa ended up asking for a sip of your coffee. You had shared much worse together, so what was one sip?

“Jesus Christ,” Tai spat. “Why the fuck is that so sugary?”

You put the lid of your coffee back on, shuffling around awkwardly. “I like it sweet.”

Tai shoots you a look saying she clearly doesn’t approve, and just Natalie laughs slightly, thinking about something.

The elevator dings to a stop, and Natalie walks out and bangs on the apartment door, rustic farmhouse style, and Shauna opens the door with a shush.

“Is this his apartment?” Taissa asks, and the three of you file in, looking around awkwardly. You step around the counter, expecting someone to walk around from around the kitchen, or the bathroom, still not quite believing he’s dead- but Taissa suddenly lets out a loud gasp. “Oh, my God, Shauna… you killed him?”

A man lays on the floor, blood dripping from his mouth, an open stab wound in his chest.

“You guys are, like, so fucking insane,” you mutter, not able to take your eyes away from the pooling blood.

“Who is he?” Nat asks, less shocked by this, for whatever the reason.

“I met him a few months ago. We got into a car accident and then we started… sleeping with each other.”

“For fucks sake, Shauna, this is your boyfriend?”

“You were seeing somebody around the time that all of us got blackmailed and didn’t think to mention it?” Nat asks, throwing her hands around in odd ways.

“I’m telling you now,” she sighs.

Nat gestures to the dead body. “When he’s dead!” she shouts. “When he can’t fucking mumble a word to us. What the fuck, Shauna?” She starts pacing.

“Jesus Christ, are you even sure he did it?” Tai asks.

“Well, um… he went out to get coffee for us this morning, and when he was gone,” she picks up the duffel bag with Callie’s handprints on it, “I found this in his closet.”

Natalie snatches it for her.

“He came back and he saw me with it, and, you know, he realized that I must know what he did, so, he attacked me.”

You look over at Shauna, but she doesn’t seem hurt.

“And, I, um, you know, I had no choice.”

“Where’s my money?” Natalie asks, throwing around the empty bag.

“Where’s your money, Natalie? I’m not sure. Maybe he booked a cruise with it,” she sighs.

Natalie slams the bag onto an armchair, and you roll your eyes.

“Uh, it’s not here, but the burner phone, the one with the texts from your guys, it’s…” she holds up the small black flip phone.

“How did he know anything about the symbol?” Tai sighs.

“Well, um,” Shauna starts, digging through the bag and clearing her throat, “He also had these.” She holds up a small leather bound notebook.

“Oh, Shauna,” you mutter. “You didn’t.”

“What the fuck is that?” Tai asks.

Shauna sighs heavily, looking away from everyone. “They’re my… journals… from the wilderness. I-I couldn’t get rid of them. I’ve been really careful, they’re in a safe in my closet, but… he must have broken into it sometime pretty soon after we started seeing each other.”

“Holy shit, Shauna. You let this guy in your house?”

“Can you try to be a little less judgemental? I already feel stupid enough as it is.”

“You really think this is the guy who killed Travis?” Nat asks, leaning over the body.

You want to say something, to smack her, make it get through her head that sometimes death just happens. And she, out of all people, should know that.

“I-I don’t know.”

Natalie leans forward and starts touching him, and you bite back a gag.

“Oh, my God, don’t start touching him-”

“Natalie, don’t do that!”

“Jesus Christ!” you shout. “What if he has like, fucking HIV or something, Natalie-”

Shauna shoots you a wide-eyed look.

“-or something else!”

“I can’t believe you killed him, Shauna!” she shouts after she’s done with her search. “Now we’re not gonna know anything!”

“Well, you were gonna shoot him at the warehouse,” Shauna retorts.

“Okay, which, recall, we told her not to do.” Tai says.

“I wouldn’t have fucking killed him, I would’ve just hit his knees-” Nat starts to explain.

“He was lying to me,” Shauna says. And you look over and there’s tears in her eyes. “He was going to hurt me. I thought that- that he loved me, I trusted him,” she cries.

“Shauna,” you mumble, giving her a small hug as she turns around and wipes away her tears.

“Well, I needed answers. So, fuck, Shauna!”

“So, now what?” Shauna says after a moment, and you let the hands around her fall.

“Well, we can’t just leave him here.”

“Well, we can’t exactly- Weekend at Bernie’s him out the door, either.”

“Getting rid of the body isn’t our only problem, Shauna. Your fucking DNA is all over this place. Your fucking texts are in his cloud. God, the police are not gonna have to dig deep to find you.”

“Yeah, no shit,” Shauna says after Tai’s outburst. “You’re a lawyer. What-what do we do?”

“I practiced land use, not murder clean-up.”

Natalie finishes walking around the apartment, whatever she was looking for still not found.

“Hey. You’re all silent over there, that’s unusual. You got any ideas?”

Natalie sighs like she doesn’t want to say it.

“Yeah. One.” She rolls her eyes.

—-

1996-

You wake up on the cold ground, feeling like you had just committed a murder. There’s something sticky running down your chest and throat, and you’re covered in dirt, and you can tell your makeup is smeared.

Natalie groans.

You don’t remember how you got here last night, besides for faintly stumbling through the woods, Natalie dropping the knife they had almost killed Travis with, practically boiling in anger. You remember before that more clearly, the trees bending, looking for her, finding her and then Jackie.

Natalie sits up next to you and stares at you with wide eyes, your lipstick smeared all over her face and neck, and when you feel your tangled hair and look at your ripped dress, it’s not hard to figure out what happened.

“My neck hurts,” is the first thing you say.

She laughs. “Well, sleeping on the ground will do that.”

She’s still angry, you can tell, but all of last night is so hazy.

“What-what happened?” you mumble, trying to fix your dress, dusting the dirt off of you.

“Misty poisoned us,” she mumbles, bringing her knees up to her chest as she stares off into the distance. You stop.

“What? I mean, I know now that I was hallucinating, but, I-”

“Yep. Shrooms,” she whispers.

You reach forward and place your hand over hers.

“Natalie… what happened last night?”

She stares at you for a long moment. “I don’t know.”

—-

The two of you walk through the vaguely familiar woods, and after a moment, her hand slips back into yours, and you start to head towards the cabin.

Natalie squeezes your hand. “What did she mean, last night? Do you know?”

“Know what?” you frown, looking up at the trees, trying to remember what happened last night- but parts of it are covered in a haze.

“Lottie? How we’ll all see it like you soon?”

When you look at her, she looks scared.

“Lottie was high off her ass last night. Don’t- don’t listen to her, Nat.”

She pulls you to a stop.

“What do you remember from last night?”

“I hallucinated trees moving. I… I remember wanting to find you. I-I wanted to apologize, Natalie.”

She doesn’t say anything for a moment. “You don’t have to.”

“No, I’m sorry,” you whisper. “It was stupid, and I-I don’t know what I was thinking. I care about you, Nat, and not your past.”

She smiles and looks at the ground before looking back up at you, her crown of sticks hanging out of her hair. She looks back up at you, and her eyes soften, and she places a tentative hand on your cheek.

“I would have nothing if I lost you,” she whispers. “You… you’re my best friend, Y/N. You’re everything.”

What happens if violence and peace aren’t different? What if they’re one in the same? What if it’s the sun and the moon, constantly chasing each other through the sky, never quite meeting. What happens if peace and violence are connected in a way that is beyond your understanding?

“We’ll be better this time,” she says, staring at your lips. You hum, staring at hers.

You lean forward and kiss her.

This is what happens.

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taglist:

@sweetdayme4427 @dreaming-for-an-escape @peachydoki @happysparklingshadows @zhivaxo @maraudeerrs @karsonromanoff

everything taglist:

@emilynissangtr

#yellowjackets x reader #natalie scatorccio #natalie scatorccio x reader

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cannibalizedyke · 1 year

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❤︎︎ character list ❤︎︎

key: bolded - characters i enjoy writing for | italics - characters i’ve written for before

❥ 10 things i hate about you

cameron james, kat stratford, bianca stratford, patrick verona, michael eckman, mandella

❥ marvel

natasha romanoff, bucky barnes, steve rogers, carol danvers, stephen strange, sam wilson, gamora, gwen stacy, tony stark, kate bishop, loki laufeyson, may parker, peter parker (tasm & mcu), peter quill, pietro maximoff, wanda maximoff, thor odinson, yelena belova

❥ pirates of the caribbean

jack sparrow, will turner, elizabeth swann

❥ grishaverse

alina starkov, the darkling / aleksander morozova, malyen oretsev, genya safin, david kostyk, zoya nazyalensky, nikolai lantsov, kaz brekker, inej ghafa, jesper fahey, nina zenik, matthias helvar, wylan van eck

❥ the school for good and evil

agatha of woods beyond, sophie of woods beyond, tedros of camelot, hort of bloodbrook, hester of ravenswood, anadil of bloodbrook, dot of nottingham, rafal

note: sophie x hort x reader is a fav

❥ the hunger games

katniss everdeen, peeta mellark, gale hawthorne, haymitch abernathy, finnick odair, johanna mason

❥ harry potter

harry potter, ron weasley, hermione granger, ginny weasley, fred weasley, george weasley, draco malfoy, neville longbottom, luna lovegood, cedric diggory, oliver wood, theodore nott, daphne greengrass, blaise zabini, tom riddle, james potter, sirius black, remus lupin, lily evans, regulus black, mary macdonald, dorcas meadowes, marlene mckinnon

❥ miss peregrine’s home for peculiar children

jacob portman, emma bloom, enoch o’connor (MOVIE ONLY), olive abroholos elephanta (MOVIE ONLY), millard nullings (BOOK ONLY), hugh apiston (BOOK ONLY), fiona frauenfeld (BOOK ONLY), bronwyn bruntley (BOOK ONLY)

note: i will write for book- or movieverse jacob & emma. please specify which you would like when requesting or i will default to bookverse.

❥ shatter me

juliette ferrars, aaron warner, kenji kishimoto, nazeera ibrahim

❥ the folk of the air

jude duarte, cardan greenbriar

❥ percy jackson

percy jackson, annabeth chase, grover underwood, thalia grace, jason grace, piper mclean, leo valdez, frank zhang, reyna avila ramirez arellano

❥ avatar: the last airbender

katara, sokka, zuko, azula, mai, ty lee

❥ a series of unfortunate events

violet baudelaire, klaus baudelaire, duncan quagmire, isadora quagmire, quigley quagmire

❥ newsies

jack kelly, davey jacobs, katherine pulitzer, crutchie morris, spot conlon

❥ frankenstein

victor frankenstein, the monster, elizabeth lavenza, henry clerval

❥ little women

jo march, meg march, beth march, amy march, theodore laurence

❥ star wars

anakin skywalker, obi-wan kenobi, padme amidala, luke skywalker, leia organa, han solo, rey, finn, kylo ren, poe dameron

❥ my babysitter’s a vampire

ethan morgan, benny weir, sarah fox, rory keaner, erica jones

❥ yellowjackets

shauna shipman, lottie matthews, misty quigley, taissa turner, van palmer, natalie scatorccio, jackie taylor, laura lee, mari, akilah, jeff sadecki

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disregardcanon · 9 months

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semi-realistic thoughts about where the yellowjackets and co might be in 2021 if the plane HAD crashed but they got rescued before laura lee died because misty never found the black box

tai- in exactly the same place, but with better coping mechanisms and a stable and realistic relationship with simone. sammy still has some issues because tai represses stuff and is still a politician who’s keeping secrets about the wilderness, but tai actually does let him get the therapy he needs. she’s still close to shauna and akilah, and she wishes that she could be close with van, but things are weird there. she always knew van wanted different things out of life than she did, but it was a lot harder to break things off after they lived through a plane crash and a few months in the wilderness together.

van- jack of all trades, master of none. she’s been a summer camp counselor all over the country, done bit parts in lots of movies, was on jeopardy once, managed a spirit halloween, got involved in cutco knives before she realized it was an mlm, worked at an amusement park, taught english to kids in different countries (never with the US military though because that sucks), worked at a ski resort. she’s had a lot of girlfriends that never really stuck, but she’s glad for all of them. she still talks to quite a few of the yellowjackets, but it’s... hard. when she talks to tai. taissa the accomplished lawyer and now state senator thinks that she should settle down, and that’s a little hard to hear from the high school girlfriend who dropped van when she went off to college.

coach ben- after his experience in the wilderness with the girls and losing his leg, there is absolutely NO way he’s going back to teaching. he tries to make things right with paul and after some work, he ends up moving in with paul in the city. paul’s a writer already, so ben gives it a try and does some comedy columns and sports columns.

nat- had a couple of years right after high school where she was drifting and on just about every drug in the book until she accidentally runs into ben and paul at a party and ben’s like oh my god NATALIE!??! and makes her sleep on their couch for a while. eventually she ends up making weird art and coaching a kids’ soccer team. she has some short term romantic relationships with both men and women but none of them ever really stick.

misty and crystal- coach very gently told her when they were in the hospital that he was gay and not interested. and she was like “oh you figured it out because i was so wonderful and you weren’t attracted to me, so you knew you couldn’t like girls?” and he sighed and went. yes misty. that’s how. and she put a hand on his shoulder and said “how brave. how inspiring” and then misty started telling this story to any teammate who would listen. crystal was the only one who didn’t roll her eyes and she was like “omg, a gay teacher? like in the children’s hour????” and then they become best friends going into the next year of school. misty doesn’t HAVE a secret that’s big enough to break them up so they just. stay together.

misty stays on as the equipment manager but mainly just to cheer on her bestie and they join theater together. they don’t do very well but they LOVE it, and they decide to go to the same college to be roommates. crystal becomes a quirky high school theater teacher and misty still becomes a concerning RN who dates and intimidates weird little guys, but they live together and are like, what, gay? *pft* no, we’re besties! and they are, but god are they weird about it

laura lee and lottie- lottie’s parents made her go to the same ivy that her dad went to, and she really hates it, even though she does her best and gets her degree. (i’m thinking some kind of counseling/leadership) laura lee goes to a bible college that skews too conservative for her and she hates it too, so much that she decides to drop out until she can figure out where she DOES want to go. a lot of soulsearching and mishaps later, and lottie is taking on a youth minister position at a nondenominational hippie dippie queer loving church and inviting laura lee to check it out, and laura lee falls in LOVE WITH IT and then goes straight into the seminary she can find that best lines up with her own values. they become a power couple and get married in 2004 as soon as it’s legal. they end up with a congregation that isn’t very large but is dedicated and does a lot of good in their area.

travis and javi- coach martinez still died, so things are hard, but not nearly as hard as in canon. they work through his death as best as they can with their mom, and travis stays at home the next year to go to community college before leaving home. javi makes him join a dungeons and dragons campaign and it actually helps him a lot with the Big Feelings Time. travis goes into something that his dad thought was nerdy and not masculine enough but that he likes and is good at, and javi becomes an artist. he and shauna collaborate sometimes on projects <3. also travis and jackie become weird friends at community college

mari- she’s an mlm girlie but one that is Proud! Of! It! she’s got a big enough downline that she actually supports herself this way, even though it.... still sucks and is soulsucking. but it lets her be a little bitchy, do tasks, and be kind of in charge and kind of not in charge and mari DOES like that.

melissa and gen- let them play soccer together in college because they were on the fabled yellowjackets team that never got to go to nationals as well as the one that WON! let melissa get butcher. let gen have a sexuality crisis as she gets jealous about girls falling all over her best friend. let them be soccer lesbians who eventually move to denver and buy a subaru

akilah- they find out that shauna’s pregnant before they’re rescued and right before laura lee’s able to make her incredible journey. akilah the girl scout finds herself worrying about what might have happened if they had to deliver a baby out there, even though they DIDN’T. then she does a lot of research into the subject on top of studying for her SAT and finds out about maternal mortality rates in the united states, especially among black women like her and her sister. she decides to become an OBGYN to try to fight the problem, and despite the hardships, she makes it happen. she also gets to upset her sister with terrible pregnancy fun facts, which is what siblings are for

jackie- has a blowout fight with shauna about the jeff thing after they get back, straining her relationships with every member of the team. she still tries at college, but she rushes and doesn’t get a bid for a single sorority (she’s going through a crisis where she’s realized she’s a lesbian and doesn’t know what to do with that and also. is very depressed and angry), her potluck roommate doesn’t like her, and her classes are so hard now without shauna to help. she doesn’t know how to ask for help and things spiral for the two semesters it takes for her to get kicked out of college. she’s home the summer afterward, with her parents desperately trying to get her to figure out a different college or go out with jeff again (we understand what he did, but you aren’t exactly... rolling in prospects right now) and she’s just going crazy in her room.

shauna and jackie- shauna gets an abortion and does go to brown! she’s really upset with where things ended with jackie, but she’s still close to tai and some of the other girls and she’s exploring her bisexuality at college, so she’s doing okay javi sends her drawings sometimes, and that’s nice. when she comes home over her first summer and sees jackie absolutely rotting... she feels awful enough to try to mend the bridge. it doesn’t totally work, but by the end of the season they’re on speaking terms again, and over the next few holiday breaks they become tentative friends again, then good friends, then homoerotic girls who are dancing around each other.

jackie tries out the community college thing and tries hanging out with jeff again, who’s working at his parents’ furniture store. her parents are convinced they’re dating and jeff kind of is too and jackie... tries to see if she can fix herself. she forces herself to let it be dating and then they have sex and it feels wrong and weird and bad... but she does it. and jeff’s magical sperm does its thing.

timeline-wise the pregnancy becomes clear about 3 months before shauna’s graduation from brown/jackie’s graduation from the community college. (she and travis are weird friends there. no i’m not elaborating but it happened) and her parents are freaking out and trying to get her and jeff to get married right now immediately to save face, and jackie just. cries. and calls shauna. and cries some more. and they have a heart to heart and confess some feelings and decide that they’ll try dating and kinda. raise the baby together. (it’s callie yay!)

jackie isn’t going to be able to move in with shauna until after she finishes this semester and gets a bigger place, and her parents are livid that she refused jeff’s offer and is still keeping the baby! (they don’t even know she’s a lesbian yet) so she has to move in temporarily with the martinezes javi shows her lots of art pieces and is like “would shauna like this?” and the answer is always yes.

eventually, shauna becomes an editor for the local paper and a fiction writer. jackie stays home with bby callie for a bit and then cycles between different odd jobs for a while as she tries to find a good fit. she eventually ends up as middle management at a small company where she does a whole lot of team-building exercises that everyone pretends to hate until she pulls out the prizes

#yellowjackets #yellowjackets aus #jackieshauna #taivan #taisimone #lottielee #genmelissa #melissagen #the yellowjackets

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transmutationisms · 1 year

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Very interested to hear your thoughts on Yellowjackets in light of your cannibalism post

i honestly feel like i was like, themes-baited into watching yellowjackets. i did make it through the first season because i was led to believe there would be certain payoffs and they just never arrived lol.

like, obviously the present-day storyline with taissa is implicitly built off the idea that cannibalism is a threat to her political career specifically because it's coded as an uncivilised act, and her being black (and gay) plays in here. basically her career is threatened by the implication that she's feral, her appetite is out of control, etc. but the show never does anything with this, never interrogates this discourse, and seems (in season 1 at least) to actually be operating fully within this white/colonial paradigm insofar as taissa killing the dog and eating dirt are meant to signal her instability and 'wildness.' (as a side-note, dirt-eating specifically was historically configured as a 'slave disease' in the atlantic world, and the writers seem wholly unaware of this or at least unwilling to engage with it; you can read more about it in rana hogarth's 2017 book "medicalizing blackness".)

i can understand conceptually why people care about shauna/jackie but i simply don't lol. based on where the first season left them i assume shauna is about to eat jackie or something. they are not an interesting pair to me, cannibalism-wise, largely because i think they basically function as a shock-value use of cannibalism as a symbol. like, it really comes across as "holy shit, look at these respectable white girls who are engaging in acts of uncivilised savagery." i find this a problem for the entire show actually, and it is certainly true to its "lord of the flies" inspiration in that sense. but whereas william golding was explicitly engaging with ideas of what it means to be 'civilised' and inverting ballantyne's "the coral island" by portraying the boys themselves as the source of evil, yellowjackets seems largely unaware of such intellectual and cultural context, and seems to want to interrogate cannibalism as an expression of Girlhood without admitting that this invocation of cannibalism is very much a discourse of whiteness and how racialisation works.

besides all that, i simply did not think it was a very good tv show dfgdgfdgf as in, the dialogue is limp, the pacing is whack, the cult/evangelism shit is annoying and unnecessary, and the different storylines are poorly integrated. there are economic reasons tv tends to be bad and i would be willing to overlook mechanical problems if the show was About Something, but it's really not, imo, because it gets stuck on a voyeuristic interest in Girls Debasing Themselves and doesn't even go anywhere with that theme.

#SORRY to be a hater but i hated this one #yellowjackets

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lottieurl · 10 months

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so very tired of HOT TAKES that are like yellowjackets isn't about cannibalism and in fact i do not want more cannibalism to happen because it's actually about trauma and the adults trying to move on from it <3 like okay quick tell me about the trauma you speak of without mentioning the cannibalism. next! what particular scene is about them moving on that's not ALSO about them failing at moving on from it. is it taissa's vegetarianism? is it taissa beheading her pet? is it shauna killing her lover and cutting up his body? is it lottie recreating the cult they formed in the wilderness? is it travis dying because he wanted to communicate with the wilderness decades later? is it them all taking part in that very same ritual they created back then that ends in death this time as well and that ALWAYS ENDED IN CANNIBALISM BEFORE? lets not rush through this lets be very thorough. genuinely what is the obsession with "it's not about cannibalism ACTUALLY" takes about every show or book or movie where the core of the plot is indeed cannibalism. like at that point what does it mean for a show or a movie or a book to be about cannibalism? does it mean there is absolutely NOTHING else going on? and i mean it literally because

so i guess the entirety of it has to be someone nameless chewing on human flesh with absolutely NOTHING else even mentioned or else it's not about cannibalism according to online critics. oh you can find a deeper symbolic meaning in the cannibalism? so it's not about cannibalism. why are you so afraid of admitting that yes among other things it's about cannibalism. why are you willing to talk about how Actually it's about trauma but ignore the way literally all of that trauma is tied to cannibalism. AND YES IT CAN ALWAYS BE ABOUT CAPITALISM OR ABOUT POSSESSIVE RELATIONSHIPS OR ABOUT MEAT INDUSTRY OR ABOUT GRIEF OR OR OR. does not change the fact that it's cannibalism does it?

#person watching a show that BEGINS with a scene of a girl being hunted to get eaten: how dare you call it a cannibalism show #yj is more abt cannibalism than fcking hannibal imo are you kidding me rn #and its hilarious to be like its abt them moving on in modern timeline so they cant eat people. WHO THE FUCK MOVED ON #S2 ENDS WITH ADULTS RECREATING P MUCH EVERYTHING ALL OVER AGAIN MILES AWAY FROM THE WILDERNESS #WHAT SHOW ARE YOU WATCHING #misty voice MOVE ON??!??!??

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itchose · 2 months

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jessica doesn't get nervous about these kinds of conversations anymore; hesitant, maybe, because she's never sure what to really expect, but most of the time, she's more energized than anything, just as she had been with every survivor she'd spoken to thus far, despite it always ending the same ( with something along the lines of 'fuck off' and the same, seemingly calculated and practiced answer of, 'you won't get any of us to talk.' ) she'd been most intrigued by mikayla desousa, given her history — there's so much more leverage to use here with her, given all the stories that had focused on @manslaught over the years, but jessica also knows she still has to be more careful with her. while she doesn't believe most of the stories, she's still unpredictable, and despite taissa's insistence that mikayla was the one she didn't need to test, jessica has a feeling mikayla has a lot less to lose than the rest of them, and she's prepared to give her everything she's got despite taissa's insistence. she promised to be thorough — that means it's mikayla's turn.

❝ 'tantalus in tartarus: the imprisonment of mikayla desousa'. it's got quite the ring to it. a lot more meat to the title than there is to the story inside, isn't there? ❞ she scoffs, trying to level with her, prepared to make her stance clear: it's a work of fiction, that much was obvious the moment she opened it, but not everyone knows how to dissect a story the way she does, and that's important now that she's talking to her. ❝ sounds like a whole lot of bullshit to me, ❞ she goes on, shrugging her shoulders. ❝ since i've never caught you hitting back, i imagine that's true, right? that it's all bullshit? why is that, anyway? someone writes a book about you, exploits their time with you just to make a buck, and you've never set the record straight? ❞

#manslaught #thread: jessica.#arc: jessica / season 1.#since you're making me do this im making it clear it was not tais idea- fksjalfdksjakfldj #have to protect my girl this one time

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ecoamerica · 25 days

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youtube

Watch the American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 now: https://youtu.be/bWiW4Rp8vF0?feature=shared

The American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 broadcast recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by active climate leaders. Watch to find out which finalist received the $50,000 grand prize! Hosted by Vanessa Hauc and featuring Bill McKibben and Katharine Hayhoe!

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litcest · 4 months

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We Have Always Lived in the Castle, by Shirley Jackson

We Have Always Lived in the Castle is 1962 mystery novel by author Shirley Jackson, who also famously wrote The Lottery (1948) and The Haunting of Hill House (1959). The story is about the Blackwoods, a very wealthy family who owns a large state. Since the death of their parents, Constance Blackwood has been taking care of her younger sister, Mary Katherine (better known as Merricat) and their wheelchair bound uncle, Julian. The three of them live in perfect recluse in their manor, but when cousin Charles comes to visit, he shakes up the family dynamic.

Despite their relationship not being explicitly incestuous in the novel, Constance and Merricat share a bond closer than most sisters do. If you have read Jackson's The Haunting of Hill House, you may remember Eleanor and Theo, who weren't explicitly in a romantic relationship, but were very lesbian coded. The same applies for the Blackwood sisters, in my opinion.

In 1966 the novel was made into a play by Hugh Wheeler, and this play was used as the basis for the 2010 musical by Adam Bock and Todd Almond. But, more famously, in 2018, there was a movie adaptation by Stacie Passon, starring Taissa Farmiga as Merricat, Alexandra Daddario as Constance, Sebastian Stan as Charles and Crispin Glover as Julian.

The book is narrated by eighteen-years-old Merricat Blackwood. Despite her age, her behaviour throughout the novel is very immature and childish, probably due to the trauma she suffered at twelve, when the rest of her family (save for her sister and uncle) died. She's also very superstitious and practices sympathetic magic.

Merricat lives with Constance and Julian in the large Blackwood property in near isolation. Her only contact with the outside world is going to the village to buy groceries and visit the library. The locals aren't very keen on the Blackwood family, eyeing them with suspicion since the deaths that occurred years prior and resenting the large amount of money the family has, despite not doing any hard work.

No, really, the people in town are really nasty towards the sisters, with the children even making a mean song about them, akin to how people made that skipping rope song about Lizzie Borden.

"Merricat, said Connie, would you like a cup of tea? Oh no, said Merricat, you’ll poison me. Merricat, said Connie, would you like to go to sleep? Down in the boneyard ten feet deep!"

You see, the reason for the rhyme is that six years before the events in the book, the sisters parents, their younger brother as well as Uncle Julian and his wife were poised wit arsenic that had been mixed into the sugar bowl. Julian was the only survivor and Constance wasn't poisoned because she didn't eat sugar with her blackberries, and Merricat hadn't been in the dinner that night. Due to her being the only person present who wasn't poisoned, she was arrested and charged with murder, but ended up being acquitted and released back, much to the distaste of the village.

Probably due to her fear that Constance will be taken away again, Merricat has developed many "magical" protections around the property to avoid strangers coming in (it must be noted that Constance herself doesn't leave the house since the trial finished, so the magic could be to keep Constance safe). It's clear, from the beginning, that Merricat loves her sister and has a strong devotion to her. The feeling is mutual as evidenced by Constance telling Merricat how much she missed her, even thought Merricat had only been to village for, at most, a couple hours.

"When I was small I thought Constance was a fairy princess. I used to try to draw her picture, with long golden hair and eyes as blue as the crayon could make them, and a bright pink spot on either cheek; the pictures always surprised me, because she did look like that; even at the worst time she was pink and white and golden, and nothing had ever seemed to dim the brightness of her. She was the most precious person in my world, always."

Julian, their widowed uncle, spend his time writing his memories of the day of the poisoning, obsessively looking at the details of what happened that day and on the day before and it is through his ramblings about the event that we, the readers, learn about what happened. For exemple, he is the one who exposes the fact that Constance was the one who did the cooking, and that she has knowledge of different poisons. Not only that, but she didn't use sugar on her blackberries (although it was a known fact that she never did) and washed the sugar bowl before the police could arrive to the scene - allegedly because there was a spider in it.

Merricat is perfectly happy with Constance staying at home the whole time, as in this way she has her sister basically all to herself. When Constance starts to express some desire to leave the house, Merricat becomes upset and reacts by violently breaking their mother's fancy milk pitcher. Although she doesn't verbally express her displeasure or lashes out in front of Constance, Merricat often breaks things around the house, leaving a path of destruction on the wake of her anger.

"'We’ll always be here together, won’t we, Constance?' 'Don’t you ever want to leave here, Merricat?' 'Where could we go?' I asked her. 'What place would be better for us than this? Who wants us, outside? The world is full of terrible people.' 'I wonder sometimes.' She was very serious for a minute, and then she turned and smiled at me. 'Don’t you worry, my Merricat. Nothing bad will happen.'"

Before Constance can decide if she's ready to explore the outside world, the outside world comes knocking in the form of Cousin Charles, son of her father's other brother. Merricat dislikes him at first sight and even tries to pretend she had only dreamed about his visit and could "dream him away", but Constance seems glad to have the attention of a good looking young man, even if he is her cousin.

Charles claims he wanted to help his cousins after the tragedy that had struck, but hadn't been able because his father wouldn't allow it, but now that his father was dead, he wanted to reunite with the remaining family. Merricat is jealous of how easily Costance (whom Charles calls 'Connie') warms up to the newcomer.

"She was not at all awkward or uncomfortable; it was as though she had been expecting all her life that Cousin Charles would come, as though she had planned exactly what to do and say, almost as though in the house of her life there had always been a room kept for Cousin Charles."

To keep Charles away, Merricat nails a gold watch into a tree, and when Charles sees it, he gets angry because it was a waste of gold. His obsession with money leads Julian to start to think that Charles is only there to try to steal the family fortune.

Charles is no innocent either. When he realises that he won't win Merricat's affection, he quickly start being passive aggressive with her, even insinuating that he might convince Constance to throw her out. And at the same time he tells Connie she should not be waiting on Julian, Charles also has her cook and clean for himself.

Merricat tries her best to shield herself and her sister, but all she can actually do is small actions, like breaking Charles' watch and pouring water in his bed. Charles gets furious with Merricat's childish antics and while Constance doesn't condenes her sister, she doesn't defends her either, simply calling Merricat "silly".

"'You are evil,' I said to Charles. 'You are a ghost and a demon.' 'What the hell?' Charles said. 'Don’t pay any attention,' Constance told him. 'Don’t listen to Merricat’s nonsense.'"

During a large argument between Charles, Merricat and Julian, Charles tell them that Merricat needs to be punished, which makes her run away in fear. Upset and even more angry than before, Merricat waits until dinner time and goes to Charles room, and she finds his pipe, which was still burning. She then throws in into a pile of papers which causes a fire to start. They are in the table when Charles smells smoke.

Constance and Merricat run for safety, but Julian stays behind to gather his papers (the many manuscripts he wrote of his memories from the day of the poisoning). The firefighters come, but they eye the sisters with suspicion, causing them to run and hide in the woods surrounding the property. While all this is going on, Charles is worried about the money in the safe.

"Pulling Constance, I hurried under the trees, in the darkness; when I felt my feet leave the grass of the lawn and touch the soft mossy ground of the path through the woods and knew that the trees had closed in around us I stopped and put my arms around Constance. 'It’s all over,' I told her, and held her tight."

While hiding in the forest, Merricat says that she'll poison everyone and Constance acknowledges that Merricat had done that once before, six years before, by putting arsenic in the sugar as payback for having been sent to the bedroom without dinner.

"'I put it in the sugar.' 'I know. I knew then.' 'You never used sugar.' 'No.' 'So I put it in the sugar.'"

Morning comes and the sisters come out of their hiding spot to see the damage that happened to the house. Most of it is gone, but they decide to clean the few rooms that didn't get crushed or burned and keep living there. Due to the lack of a roof, the house now looks like a castle (hence the title) and with time, vines grow to cover the remaining structure. Charles, who had survived the fire, tries to talk to Constance again, but she rejects him.

The Blackwood sisters become a short of local legend and villagers leave offerings of food in their doorsteps. They go on with living happily in the house, having only each other's company, because they don't need anything else.

"'I love you, Constance,' I said. 'And I love you, my Merricat.'"

Like a said before, they are not canonically incestuous, but it isn't difficult to see why they are so shippable. They protect each other at all costs and can barely function when separated. Since the book ends with them going into isolation, who knows what feelings might come to light?

#constance and merricat #proship #shipcest #sibcest #non canon #sisters #we have always lived in the castle #shirley jackson #book review

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avadaniels · 4 months

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creations from every month of 2023

thank you so much for tagging me @katherines and @alexshenry! 💕 i really loved doing this last year and it's always fun to revisit all of my fandoms lol. it was tough to pick favorites since i've put so much love and effort into improving my gifs and trying new things over the past year.

JANUARY Most Popular: Lestat + tumblr tags Favorite: IWTV Drag Race, Wenclair

FEBRUARY Most Popular: Stranger Things + the narrative (also a fave of the year) Favorite: Loustat, Taissa Turner

MARCH Most Popular: Tomgreg 4x01 Favorite: Sarah Cameron

APRIL Most Popular: Quinta Brunson SNL Favorite: Shiv Roy, Tom 4x05, Joe Keery birthday

MAY Most Popular: Romangerri Favorite: Succession S4, Tomshiv, Van Palmer 2x06, Antler queen parallels

JUNE Most Popular: Free Guy (he can’t even froth his own oat milk) Favorite: Taissa Turner, Kendall Roy

JULY Most Popular: Aziracrow dancing Favorite: Crowley + that Barbie song, Shiv Roy, Natalie Scatorccio

AUGUST Most Popular: RWRB Live Zahra Reaction (most popular post of the year!!) Favorite: RWRB book quotes

SEPTEMBER Most Popular: Ryan Gosling Barbie Favorite: RWRB film strip, Crowley, Dale Jennings bisexuality

OCTOBER Most Popular: Hawk x Tim 1x01 Favorite: RWRB Henry, Stranger Things S3

NOVEMBER (my most active month ever with 28 gifsets) Most Popular: Hawk x Tim 1x02 Favorite: Aziracrow lyrics, Gen V + text posts

DECEMBER Most Popular: RWRB/The Crown (bonus video trailer) Favorite: Lucy Gray Baird, Fellow Travelers Eras

tagging: @leclercpiastri @hauntedlilies @evansgarfield @edteachs @ruby-monday @prideandprejudice @ajcrowleys @padme-amidala

#tag game #text

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happywifehappy1ife · 6 months

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ben and the magus

on my rewatch of season two, i noticed many new things: travis holding javis toy fox before he eats his heart, natalie's jealousy towards jackie, just how special laura lee was to lottie and how important she was in the making of the wilderness cult, van's treatment of taissa..... but one thing that really stuck out to me was ben reading in the cabin. the book he reads half of and then puts down out of frustration is john fowles' “the magus”. i've never read it, nor had i even heard of it before seeing that episode but it peaked my interest because there are so many little things in yellowjackets that mean so much more than you would think at first glance, and i think that this is one of them. after a quick google search, i found out the basic plot of the book

*spoilers ahead*

it's about a man in his mid twenties that moves to a remote greek island to teach english. he gets caught up in a sort of cult and finds himself questioning his sanity and beliefs. there's obviously way more to the book and i do plan on reading it in the future because it sounds so interesting, but that's the basic outline.

some quotes that stood out to me and how they relate to yellowjackets and ben specifically

“any intelligent person is an atheist or an agnostic”

ben's relationship with faith is complicated. he seems to have had some sort of strict religious upbringing that caused him a lot of issues because of his sexuality and his apparently homophobic family. he can't come out because he knows that he will be shunned for it. during season one he accepts laura lee's catholicism but is ultimately disturbed that it leads to her death and the fact that she lets it cloud her judgement. he, alongside jackie, refuses to pray to the wilderness in episode ten before eating the bear and only quietly holds hands with lottie and frowns. he also doesn't involve himself in the cult in season two partly because he clearly doesn't believe in it and also because he's starving and has little to no energy. i think that ben's strict religious upbringing definitely played a part in how he felt about the cult which which may or may not lead to his murder in season two.

“It’s not about swimming. It’s about knowing in which direction to swim”

surving the crash does not mean surviving the wilderness, as we've seen many times. the three deaths that have happened so far were all, in some way, caused by the victim. laura lee knowingly flies in a potentially unsafe plane, jackie sleeps outside with winter looming and javi's pureness leaves him vulnerable to the extremities he and the rest face. you can live in the wilderness but you have to do it right, you have to abide by the rules. you could be in perfect health, have a steady amount of food and water and you'd still die if you didn't join the cult and fully submit. you have to do what it wants and you have to let it become a part of yourself. yes, ben eating jackie and javi would have made him stronger, but unless he started praying every morning and worshipping lottie or natalie he'd have no chance at survival because you need to be changed. and i don't mean the depression and suicidal ideation sone of tbe girls have, i mean the animalistic behaviour and fully leaving behind who you are and who you were. the yellowjackets haven't gotten to that point yet. they are still very much themselves and we're going to see them lose it more and more throughout the show.

“not only animal species disappear, but also species of feelings”

i still can't figure out what this one means in relation to yellowjackets but i still find it fascinating. if i do figure something out, i'll definitely make sure to edit with my thoughts.

#ben scott #yellowjackets meta #yellowjackets

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oosahwtf · 11 days

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After a 6 month hiatus from reading I have finally returned with the novel Juniper and Thorn by Ava Reid. My friend @zxromance and I recently started doing a book club to help me get back into reading and writing more and Juniper and Thorn was the first book I chose. That being said, many of the thoughts and opinions I share in this report are taken from the notes and discussion between @zxromance and I so I would like to credit him for his contribution to my overall take away from this novel. Before I get into it I would also like to state THERE ARE MAJOR SPOILERS in this report and if you read the description of this novel and think it’s something you might be interested in reading please read the novel and come back to this.

Juniper and Thorn by Ava Reid is a gothic horror fantasy novel that is a retelling of The Juniper Tree from Grimm’s Fairy Tales. I would like to mention there are trigger warnings on this book for child S.A., S.A., cannibalism, self mutilation, body dysmorphia, eating disorders, child abuse, abuse, and general body horror. I will say, when I saw those trigger warnings I was nearly scared off from reading this book all together but I believe the author handled these topics gracefully and it was a pretty easy read all things considered. I did struggle a bit in the beginning with not understanding what a lot of the words meant, as to be expected in a fantasy novel, but with a little bit of googling it was a much smoother read after the first couple of chapters.

I think one of my favorite aspects of this book that I kept coming back to is how perfectly it captures the cycle of abuse and how it affects people's behaviors and decisions. One example of this is how Marlinchen keeps returning to her father instead of just leaving. I know as a survivor of abuse that this is so common to return to these situations out of comfort and fear of the unknown, especially if this is all you’ve ever known. Marlinchen is also so scared of her abuser that she believes he has a lot more power over her than he actually does. You see this when she believes that he can make these potions that he isn’t actually capable of creating and he threatens her with a lot of things he never actually does. It is common once you escape abuse that you realize how small your abuser actually is. Another example of how well this novel shows abuse is the relationship between Sevastyan and Derukach. Not only is there sexual abuse but also financial abuse. Their relationship also shows how abusers put up the facade of kindness when met with the possibility of their victim leaving the situation. This is also shown of course between Marlinchen and her father when she returns after running away. I think another very accurate and important way that this novel depicts abuse is through Marlinchen’s sisters. Both Undine and Rosenrot were insufferable yet their characters showed perfectly the effects that the cycle of abuse has on people. They were both doing what they could do to survive and their negative behaviors were learned behaviors from their abuser, which is how the cycle of abuse is so often continued. Overall, I love how well written and accurate this part of the book is. It seems to be most of my book report but it is a consistent and constant theme in this novel.

Now since I got through the darker topics I’m going to get into my lighter hearted thoughts about the novel. Why is Marlinchen falling in love with this man immediately when all he’s done is look pretty and be an alcoholic? Because it’s a fairy tale of course. Honestly as someone who got married after knowing someone for a month when I was 18, super relatable content. It’s definitely accurate behavior for someone who is just now going out and experiencing the world and love for the first time. I would also like to add that against my will for this entire novel I could only picture Marlinchen as Taissa Farmiga in American Horror Story season one and Sevastyan as early 20s Tom Felton. A couple things that irked me through this whole novel were how often Marlinchen calls herself ugly and how annoying Sevastyan’s flirting was. I will say Marlinchen’s body image issues were very accurate to how someone’s brain would work when being abused this heavily but I got very tired of her being like “but I’m ugly” all the time. Sevastyan’s behavior was honestly just time period appropriate but still annoying. Their sex scene on broken glass was kinky enough that I’ll let all of that slide.

Overall, an amazing novel and so much more than I was expecting out of a fantasy novel honestly.

#bookblr #books and novels #novels #reading #fantasy #horror #gothic #novel #horror fantasy #gardening #dark fantasy #gothic horror #horror books #juniper and thorn #ava reid #book club #book report #book review #grimm fairy tales

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