no matter what universe, he'll always be a mama's boy 🥺

(insp.)

thinking of that transles separatist girlie who said every attractive trait in men is eroticized misogyny

tbh i probably wouldn't have finished fire candy if i hadn't deduced early on the author was a woman (the plans to cover lesser known women writing typical type seinen/shonen is going. as terrible as you would expect) and in another post i did mention the mixed shoujo/seinen visuals but i guess i focused on like more flowery aesthetics bishonen and stuff. algo guess i ignored to mention that it is pretty much the statement of the author to produce series (or erotica, at any point anyway) that's appealing to both demographics, intentionally.

not that im gonna expound lots on details either though.. (it's stilla bible tho)

i ignored to mention (just forgot sorry) in the short review that in yellow hearts, SA is a verry recurrent thing/part/context of the sex scenes (that i have to define are with the erotic intent). now even then, i don't think [SA, 'age gaps', guys w freudian-esque issues, etc] in this case at least, represent a kind of deterrent for a female audience in intent (regardless of how i feel about it). first bc those are still Very Frecuent Things in erotica more clearly demographically divided aimed and written at women anyway, and second because topics aside the author, as mentioned above, uses the language and form of shoujosei to indicate in an transparent way to emphasize so.

the female characters even in the, yk, Situations... seem to preserve a preocupation with prettiness and the impression of pleasure in their designs/expressions. in net numbers, yes, they are usually/majority of the visual focus of the sexual scenes anyway since it's a seinen (audience implicit), but it's not like i can give you a definitive distinction between what about it is [meant to be in intent] the Object of interest or what has an Self-insert quality.

***the abovementioned preocupations w pretiness etc seem to very pointedly to work under the aesthetic proclivities of shoujosei. at a point it isn't so much about what men/women want but that These XYZ elements straight up don't customarily exist in shonen/seinen and those void bridged by the shoujosei proper also customary structures of the portrayal of intimacy are what evidence the interest of being of a pleasurable quality to read to a female audience, intentionally.

the paneling at points shifts completely to that of an shojosei romance's manga, the use of halftones, textures, neg and pos space, composition; of a tenderness (eh...) and an emotional interest of the parties that for as much shitty horny seinen ive read i dont find ever being as present, like at all (not that im precisely complimenting YH either...). of couse that's speaking of the ones that arent SA; theyre all pretty equally explict and intense regardless, in an customary-shoujosei unlikely fashion, though.

in the men's department.. well, on pretty literal terms the story is about idk yakuza gang conflict or smth, there will be rock bands and whores in between that i guess. from the very beginning there will be a balance to mantain between the main male characters being a more traditional dark but youthful type of masculinity for an seinen story while also obviously being yk. bishonen (most of the main ones at least). pretty easy to discern intent with those elements i think. it also extends to the sex scenes: vaguely speaking the author has a leniency to make them more, expressive? sentitive? something like that; make them have slightly/noticeably more presence in frames, that makes the thing a speck less onesided (well, it's less frequent the older/less bishie/more traditionally masculine the character is, not that that's surprising).

lastly.. hmm.. despite the author being kind of apparently of a bl writer on the side (tho YH is completely straight), male homoeroticism is mostly kept on the side (one char mentions it) or it's expressed thru more conventional male-on-male bloodlust and violence, though limited to the individual than in pro of indicating any particular relationship between the parts. however, i think that keeping the motions of homoerotic violence w no textual outlet for it makes some of the male characters' sexuality interesting so far it's just as confused as the mixed language of shoujosei and seinen of above.

for one, it makes violence, for the seinen audience, sexual but in a slightly more unusual and/or uncomfortable way, for the genre at least. both because of a female audience in mind and how [the male characters] can serve to them in a shoujo fashion but also taking into acc BL fashions, ends up making them as much of the

"Sanji is the best written character in one piece" okay. this isn't me saying he's not a well written character, but just bc his depth and multidimensionality is laid out and labeled, doesn't mean it's "peak character writing". it's just easier for everyone to grasp bc it's so obvious and blatant. it's spelled out. every straw hat has amazing writing. they're just.... different ppl.... different ppl deal with the reality of their worlds differently. Sanji openly displays his trauma through actions caused by it. his trauma is fleshed out and explained. his character, even before wci, reflected that. b4 I even knew about wci I said "sanjis probably like this bc he was abused by toxically masculine men and women were the only ppl to show him kindness" (not 100% accurate but extremely close given I didn't know). Sanji has actions of an unhealed person who's trying to figure it out. on the other hand, Zoro, who people constantly say lacks good writing, doesnt need a backstory. bc Zoro portrays behaviors of someone who is sure of themselves and healed and knows how to cope with trauma fairly well. him not having an extensive backstory is GREAT character writing, given the type of person he is. him not having moments where hes a victim to major trauma is GREAT character writing bc that's the kind of person he is. he didn't choose to die for Luffy bc of some big emotional display. he chose it bc that's who he is and that's what he stands for and he's extremely confident in his values. it's one of the first things he even expresses in the manga. saying one straw hats writing is better than everyone else's is so reductive and it says to me, that you really aren't able to appreciate how well one piece is actually written. how every character has a different style of writing bc they're all very different ppl. they're not all going to have the same reactions to things as everyone else. and that's thoroughly portrayed in how theyre written, how they respond to extreme situations, emotional situations, etc.

i’m so curious to hear more about how the haruka and shintaro relationship develops post str. bc like there’s konoha and also the mess with shinaya and shintaro and takanes messed up dynamic and i just read your thing about how takane and shintaros friendship plays out and like… i’m so curious how or if haruka and shintaro ever get back to a good place and like how much do they even interact outside the quartet and can they even have a relationship separate from takane

YEAHYEAHYEAH WOOOO WOOOO guess what. this one also got too long💗 whatever. deal with it

i think haruka and shintaro are rly quick to go back to their old dynamic!!! but erm. ok here's the thing.

SORRY TO GET ALL ANNOYING ABT THIS AGAIN i answered this in an ask a few weeks ago BUT i am gonna repeat. it pisses me off SOOOOO MUCH that shintaro is totally normal to haruka and just a dickhead to ayano&takane. i accidentally went on a rant abt the misogynistic writing in shintaro/in general lollll and i might do it again💗 i will do it again. sorry, because when it comes to haruka & shintaro's dynamic this is SO difficult for me to get past i just can't do it so HERE I GO AGAIN:

because it pisses me off too that haruka just doesn't say anything. i WILL get to ur question i will get to haruka&shintaro post str about the whole shinaya and codependent shintaka shitshow but i need u to hear me out for a second first. YES I KNOW IM REPEATING MYSELF WHATEVER

so i know haruka not saying anything and doing stuff like Lying to takane abt hanging out with shintaro bc he knows she hates him etcetc is rather like. haruka's like theyre both my friends i hate they can't get along :( and i know its written this way because writer doesn't see the issue in question in the first place. like i said i hate how takane is always put at the level of shintaro as if she isn't defending herself. ayano just lets shintaro walk all over her + haruka is either oblivious or too spineless to say anything and takane's fighting for her life LOL like she's not stupid she knows why shintaro is a dick to her. and like damn takane was SO nice to shintaro when she first meets him and shintaro is the one to start their shitty dynamic in the hs days because he decided he hated her right off the bat without even knowing who she was. he just stood in a 2 or 3 hour line to whine abt ohh u think ur such a big shot because all these ppl think ur cool and the funny thing is that takane AT NO POINT EVER thinks this and is the total opposite, she was crying her eyes out the whole day at being exposed and having all these people here. shintaro didnt know shit. like truly what is the reason he did this other than AUUGGHH GIRLS DONT PLAY VIDEOGAMES😡😡😡 HES SO RIDICULOUS Like if he had been mean to haruka too later, I'd let it pass it'd be like ok yeah ig shintaro's wholeheartedly just a fucking asshole and who knows what his fucking problem is but LITERALLY IN THE SAME HOUR shintaro's like haruka i can teach you how to play videogames and be ur best friend lets kiss on the mouth like girl. again gay not only bc i like men but bc i hate women👍or whatever. hs shintaro i fucking hate you youre SO annoying. there is NO OTHER REASON for the treatment💗 and takane sees it and ayano & haruka either see it and dont say anything or are oblivious. ayano bc she's too awooga over shintaro and haruka because (cracks knuckles) care for internalized misogyny. sorry i know he's better than this but lollllll. either haruka is oblivious which HE IS NOT because haruka is a dumbass but in his pov he shows again and again how perceptive he is to the ppl around him. he's just a fucking spineless loser. he doesn't say anything to shintaro because then maybe shintaro will think he's lame. maybe he did say something to shintaro and shintaro was like erm whatever dude lol and haruka's like haha. yeah forget i said anything lol(sweating) but haruka isnt stupid enough not to consider why shintaro is just a dickhead to takane for no reason. sorry seriously what on earth was going thru jin's mind to write shintaro and takane's meeting like THAT 😭😭😭

yes i know theyre fictional characters and this is one of those things i could truly just ignore because it is the fault of the writer not of the, again, FICTIONAL CHARACTERS, and i do this with many things in kagepro but HERE specifically. i can't bring myself to ignore it and i dont wanna. idk, it just bothers me lol because it's an entire dynamic. you're telling me shintaro and takane had that relationship for a over a year at school and haruka just watched the whole time and didnt say anything??? he still went to be buddies with shintaro when he walked in and said all that awful shit to takane first meeting?? yeah girl im holding him accountable (as a character)idgaf. LOL!!! again erm. reminder this is written. im mad abt the sexist writing not The characters who are not real people ok? ok.

sorry maybe im butthurt because im afab🤨and reading this kinda thing is like.i wanna throw up and i get all intense. but imagine being in takane's place and ur guy friend who u think is good is like. just letting the misogynistic asshole in the friend group say shit because its not directly affecting him and ur like wow. ok then. hehe takane getting mad at haruka for always being like aw guys dont fight like she's not defending herself LOLLLL ok sorry ill stopill stop.

.........getting to the actual question. clearly i have my thoughts abt their dynamic. i think.. sorry, i just can't get past shintaro&takane's relationship in general to be able to think abt haruka&shintaro's. when i read ur ask i was like well ofc they have a relationship separate of takane!!! they're bestest friends!!! BUT... when i really think abt it... maybe not LMAOO like yeah maybe im just super like 💗💗takane💗💗 and hate the misogyny too much. and i think shintaro and ene/takane's relationship is SO titular to kagerou project that its impossible for me to ignore it??

i think generally in post str since shintaro is glued at the hip with takane who in return is also glued at the hip to haruka ofc it's never just Them two alone and takane is in fact in the middle. haruka loves hanging out with shintaro though and he loves him!! he loves when he's around he loves hanging out!! he's also excited abt shintaro and takane being besties bc at first he's like YES DREAM TEAM💥💥💥(PERCEIVES THE HORRORS) WAIT A SECOND..

i think since haruka is the one slowly talking to takane abt their codependency and etc he slowly grows to sort of. be annoyed?? at some of shintaro's behavior. because haruka tries talking to him about it the same he talks about it to takane! but while takane's all like "ummm nahhh whaaa no way ermm (holds head) OK MAYBE..." shintaro's like U THINK IM GONNA STEAL UR GIRLFRIEND UR SO FUNNY LOOOOOL and haruka's like 😐THATS NOT WHAT IM SAYING.

but like with ayano, haruka is kind of scary to shintaro. not as much as ayano, bc with her there's the whole thing abt yaki and stuff but haruka is also like. WOW he's alive huh. and also, again, shintaro is sorta pissed off at harutaka as a whole LOL 1. he's kinda down bad for both of them 2. is INSANELY jealous of their healthy & communicative & non destructive relationship in contrast to whatever the fuck he's doing with ayano. LOL!! from shintaro's perspective (subconsciously i cant stress it enough. all the shit he's doing he's rly not. on the loop(LOOL!!!)about the fact he is doing it he's rly not doing it on purpose) its comforting to know that bc of their codependency(that hes also in denial about) takane is as distanced from haruka as he is from ayano, like both their relationships suffer for it so it HAS to be normal right??

so when haruka approaches him abt it shintaro is kind of annoyed. subconsciously. at first he's like ohhh yeah of course you wanna spend time alone with ur girlfriend lol sorry man get some 👍 and haruka's like well that's not the only thing?? it's not so much about me as it is about you and takane bc this is clearly a rly bad dynamic for u guys and i think ur kind of enabling her fears and takane is really overdue in facing her reality and its not helping her to cling on u like this

actually, i think haruka is able to articulate it better to shintaro than to takane bc with takane he's terrified she'll dump him over it. because he is very worried specifically about her mental state and how she's using shintaro as a means to STILL not face her problems and the fact she is alive. but if he were to say this to her face takane would. yeah she'd freak out a lil bit so while he still does it little by little, he thinks talking directly to shintaro should be ok right!! he'll understand where he's coming from, because takane was and is dedicating her existence to shintaro for a sense of purpose while shintaro...what's shintaro's problem, haruka wonders. he acts annoyed but still stays by her. obviously he's just used to her. but it's not as extreme as it is with takane since she's DEDICATED so maybe he will hear him out!

DEAD WRONG shintaro keeps talking like omg haruka ur being just like ayano lmaooo all jealous over me and takane u guys are so funny. shintaro's so delighted he's like THANK GOD ayano and i are normal then, haruka is doing the same as her!! but haruka insists its really not so much abt jealousy at all he's just genuinely worried for both shintaro & takane. and probably grows a little annoyed over shintaro's insistence of him being jealous and refusing to listen LOL haruka: u and takane share a while understandable, deeply destructive relationship u cope mindlessly with... shintaro: u just wanna make out with her and ur mad im around :3

i think haruka even trusts shintaro with why he's telling him all this and why he struggles talking abt it to takane. so shintaro is VERY aware of haruka's delicate self worth and yeah takane too but shintaro also knows in detail abt haruka struggling to feel good enough for her and all that shit. and he feels kinda good abt it LOL shintaro's like... he kinda feels like he can have haruka under control like this. SUBCONSCIOUSLY OF COURSE AGAIN shintaro isnt a manipulative mastermind he's just GOING THRU IT.

basically haruka and shintaro do kinda have their old dynamic but now there's all this stuff abt takane. shintaro specifically keeps trying to default to their old dynamic but that's difficult bc haruka is REALLY living the moment while shintaro is still stuck in all these emotions pulling him back. so of course haruka's eq freaks him out a bit. and again pisses him the hell off that haruka and takane seem so good together while he's fighting for his life with ayano.

so when shintaro is at his wits end and hits on takane (anyone reading this out of context to my other post the anon is referring to, im sorry) it REALLY crashes down. ofc i talked abt takane's side bc that's what it was about but only briefly abt haruka. i think. i think haruka is overdue sending shintaro to hell too. from being such an asshole to both ayano and takane in highschool all the way to his fucked up relationships with both even now post str. i think that's also a nice way for haruka to step up and stop being so spineless. srry i keep calling him this but its such a perfect word to describe him. haruka is so self conscious abt everything his self confidence is so nonexistent and that holds him back from everything but i think the same way everyone is breaking by now he also has his Moment.

like haruka KNOWS shintaro is dealing with a lot. of course he knows. so haruka isnt mean about it, he doesnt yell at him about it like takane does. i think haruka just kinda. grimaces and says he's really disappointed in him. and shintaro's like GOD ID RATHER YOU PUNCH ME IN THE FACE but haruka is just silent and thats so so so much worse. shintaro keeps begging him to just punch him and haruka's like why?? and shintaro's like cuz im ur bro and i hit on ur girl :((((( and haruka's like OHHH MY GOD. DO U EVEN UNDERSTAND WHAT IS GOING ON RN DO U HEAR HOW DEMEANING IT IS TO REDUCE IT TO JUST THAT?? ITS NOT HS CRUSH STUFF.... UR DESTROYING ALL UR RELATIONSHIPS MY MAN. shintaro's like a.

so hes like WELL...IM JUST...SORRY... LIKE I WASNT THINKING... and haruka's like apologize to TAKANE not ONLY me!! apologize to ayano!!where are THEIR apologies!! what's the matter with you!! i know ur hurting but ALL OF US are, why do u get a pass to act this way!! just stop!!!!

haruka doesn't say much else but i think only that is enough to send shintaro spiraling down + all the other stuff. he's like speedrunning destroying all his relationships its so funny honestly. and i think haruka is the one to point it out to him. he says he HAS been telling him and didnt listen and he's driven it to a point where even he needs a break from him and doesnt really wanna see him rn. shintaro's like 😐meltdown style. haruka's like Closes door on ur face cutely💗

sorry i kinda talked abt so much other stuff here but yeah. 💗👍

Paul is a fucked up manchild who berates his mom the second he gets supernatural powers and sees himself as better than everyone. That’s only if you can get past herbert’s awful writing where his villains gotta be fat and gay and he repeats these facts every single time they switch povs as if the audience has somehow forgotten (seriously, highlight every time herbert mentions the villain is fat. It’s so common it’s just boring stale writing). Paul in dune is the worst kinda self insert fanfic. Dune is such a shitty book girl how do you enjoy it

ohh he definetely is a man child; i feel bad for him in like the first half of the first book mainly bc hes a teenager, hes 15, like, a teenager teenager not an almost adult 17-18. he may come from a powerful family but hes just thrust into very messed up circumstances, more or less tortured to prove hes human, has to grapple with being some sort of raised-to-be-exceptional genetic experiment and being used in some weird intergalactic lie and war, and incredible amount of historical pressure and other things. like, at 15, hes more kid than adult dealing w this. but also, while being 15, he is smart, and charming to others, and he quickly rises to great infleunce and is good at manipulation. and yea the moment he gets some more power he turns it even against his own mother, against himself, and against others and the longer they go on the more insufferbale he becomes; what ground of expeptionalism in him existed gets raised tenfold -hes an inherently flaued character by all means who even when he tries he fucked up badly many times. i mean like hell, among all the shit he ends up doing, even just that thing that he himself didnt have the power to put shit in order, so he ends up forcing it on his son, like how he was shoved into a bunch of things when he was younger

and yes lol i am well aware of the villan thing. i do get that in this context the "fat" thing and even the gay pedo thing is moreso an allegory for greed and the keeping of and hoarding of precious things (im Not saying fat ppl are like this mind u, im not saying its good either, but in many cultures fat has or is indeed revered as a sign of wealth; and this is used to contrast to those who dont have, and i reckon this is where it comes from in the story). but yes, i do think thats uhh i hate this word problamatic. the fat thing, the gay thing, the pedo thing. definetely part of an ongoing issue of attaching several of those characteristics to villans, and also of making villans generally ugly, thus associsting the two together. like yup, its definitely not good

idk tho, i think. dune was written in the 1960s by a white dude. like, it doesnt suprise me that that stuff is in there. ive read plenty of things that have parts of them that are problamatic or outdated or offensive and it just,, is what it is. like idk i can enjoy something while also being aware and critical of the parts of it that are fucked up - i think if i wasnt able to, i wouldnt be able to like,,,, explore a lot of the literature that exists out there, especially older literature, no matter from where its from in the world or if its written by men or women. most of it or most authors at least have written some weird shit or held some weird shit. idk just a stupid parallel off the top of my head i love the 1001 nights stories - i grew up with them - but theyre filled to the brim with weird shit and problamatic things and sexism and racism and slavery and whatever else, like absolutely filled - to an extend they reflect the times. i still, however, enjoy reading them tho

i also dont know how much paul is a self insert - maybe. ive never read the dude as sympathetic or a sympathetic anti-hero much. i did find the idea that out of this all-female order theyd have the idea that a male would be the one w the greatest power and some sort of prophesied force of power weird, sooo idk maybe. but idk, if its a self insert i rlyyy dont think its supoosed to be a flattering one much. the dude just gets worse and worse as the books progress, and he ends up after fucking up so much and being too weak to fix it, exiled, alone, spending his last yesrs wondering in loneliness and deep regret. so, i dont think its shown that his superiority complex or anything else brought him something good; it just lead to tragedy

mostly i like the series for the intricacy of its plot and the way its introduced, the messages it tries to send even if it at times fails or does so badly. like yea, its not perfect, but it is trying to ssy something about foreign meddeling and co-opting of religions and cultures and desperste situstions, or colonialism and capitalism, of exploitation, greed, power, etc. and also in very large part its lore, its scifi elements, its weird out there mysticism, and all the parts of it that are very, very weird. i am fascinsted by the world that this dude created. im a really big fan of magical realism and to an extent the books are like this - because they start more normal and over time become more and more mystical and fantastical and weird and less grounded as more concepts, creatures, and affects of the spice are introduced. i also do like that the main character isnt an actual hero. all this talk of prophecy and whatever, but its all bad, and it goes so fucking bad. its to an extent a subversion of classical fantasy tropes, combined with space scifi.... and yes. there are times when the writing isnt great, or when its outdated, or when it hammers things again and again (like the villan thing). i also think in many places the writing is intriguing, careful, and calls for attention and contemplation of what is happening

and idk apart from something like 1001 nights..... to an extend, i feel abt dune as i feel about game of thrones. i rly love those books. yes theyre writing by an old white man. yes there are parts of them (less than the show id say) which are problamatic and outdated and i could go on a whole list about that. but, i still enjoy them. i think the world grrm martin created is insanely insanelyyy complex, beautiful, fascinating, the lore is some of the deepest and most intriguing ive ever seen, and the character writing - the sheer complexity of the characters, the willingness to show how fucked up humans are and how often things are so stupidly complicated, the way he can get us to love even insufferable characters, the way there are no perfect good heros, the broader anti-war and even climate change message, the harsh and grounded realism of much of the series,,, the way theyre also kinda like magic realism, bc over the books magic keeps coming back more and more, the world becomes more full of mystic and mystery and prophecies which arent 100% true, the way the books are largely a subversion of fantasy tropes. like, yea. theyve got issues, grrm martins writings got issues. but i think theyre brilliant in many ways at the same time 🤷‍♀️

so i guess. yea. im definitely not saying the books dont have issues or theyre perfect or theyre the peak of literature. but im still able to enjoy parts of them

i get that people genderbend male character to be female in mxtx stories (esp if those ppl are wlw) because the majority of characters are male and it is focused on mlm content. so i support wlw simping over cool necromancer lesbians you go girlies, but in general i tend to stay away from genderbend stuff because sooooo much of it is made by cis ppl and it can be a bit transphobic? it also a lot of the times falls into the cishet gender stereotype shit of "women big boobie slim waist small big lips big eyes, men big buff strong macho 8 pack square" which is! oh no cringe!

yeah EXACTLY like my thoughts too. bc the vast majority of genderbending made by cis ppl really is just. like you said. biological gender stereotype shit. i feel like most trans people i see are made pretty uncomfortable by this, and i can totally see why, so i am too. but at the same time i DO understand wlw who want more content with girls/wlw characters esp when there are so few to begin with. so like im kinda willing to give wlw the benefit of the doubt in this case even though i dont rly like to interact with it myself. but also, my beloved sisters in christ... baihe exists

the only genderbending ill really interact with is works with sqx, he xuan*, and hua cheng like since theyre the ones that are shown to or mentioned to change gender in canon. (ling wen too, tho tbh i dont rly care about male!ling wen lmfao, just for the sole reason that, well. i am a lesbian. tho i do have to say the lore behind her male form is actually rather compelling and i think if mxtx were more skilled and open to writing analysis about gender, it could lead to a very thoughtful and nuanced discussion of how ling wen views herself, rather than just if she looks like a cis woman shes a woman if she looks like a cis man shes a man. because iirc she only shapeshifted to get the extra power she had in her male form? that doesnt mean that she is now a man, but in those scenes the book automatically refers to her as such. would love an extra about ling wen's self image and gender. but no, we had to get the statue sex and weird underage amnesia stuff 🙄)

BUT ANYWAY like idk if it really counts as genderbending in tgcf's case? but either way i know mxtx made that ~gods and ghosts can change gender at will~ thing just as a haha comedic relief thing like i think them having the power to do that is totally cool but i do not think it was done respectfully at all, especially with sqx, since mxtx kind of either intentionally or not sends the message (at least to me) that you can only be trans if you pass as cis. ive said it a million times before and ill say it again but the way sqx is never referred to as a woman (by the characters, the narrative, and even THEMSELF) after they lose the ability to LOOK like a cis woman is so so infuriating to me. like theyre not going to just STOP being genderfluid/trans just bc they cant change their appearance. and also not to mention throughout the book they were just kinda treated as being silly and immature for wanting to change their gender in the first place, so, another win for transphobia i guess. though i can appreciate having a canon trans/genderfluid character, they definitely could have been written better in that regard

*while i love fem!he xuan... it did leave a kinda dirty taste in my mouth when mxtx had to make sure we knew that he xuan only did it to appease sqx, and actually hated being a woman. and the way it was talked about too like 'oh he was forced to be in a womans body so OF COURSE he was super pissed the entire time' like i cant explain it but it was just kind of upsetting. kinda transphobic and misogynist. one might even say,..... transmisogynist 🤔

this answer kinda ended up going on a tangent but yea lol thanks for the ask ^^

rewatching Hxh is such an experience. when i first started i remember just consuming it like i would any other media (i dont remember how old i was then, but i know it was pretty young). now that im such a different person vs who i was then its so weird rewatching it and looking back at things i thought were funny, attractive, or normal in the show is so... eugh. 

i havent seen anyone talk about this so im sorry if im just repeating old information. 

what is up with Gon??

i know, i know, probably the last person you thought i could have a problem with. and i dont! not really, at least. what im wanting to talk about is all the jokes surrounding him.

okay, so, were all aware of Hisoka. the creepy sadistic clown who has a thing for little kids. im not entirely sure how i should be phrasing this so im just gonna try and get everything out of my brain. sorry if it feels like im repeating myself, im trying not to. 

(disclaimer!! im not trying to cancel hxh or anything i just never see anything relating to gons experiences when it comes to this)

so while rewatching i kept on noticing just how many jokes there are about Gon being a victim of child abuse/groominig (maybe not the best word for it, but i hope what im trying to say is clear). 

just a few off the top of my head:

jokes with hisoka. the amount of jokes around him having some weird perverted  thing for gon (a twelve yo) is astonoshing. I alwasy thought it was weird that characters wont even comment about it (at least not a real comment, more like one making a joke about what a perv he is)

and i could maybe excuse it as it being ‘hes a pretty important character’, but idk. still grosses me out and the fact nobody says anything. especially when that one scene when (in greed island) when hisoka is looking at G+K’s butts and they make him walk in front. I dont remember who it was but one of the adults (i dont think it was bisky but it could have been) just thought ‘oo hes so scary and powerful and a perv’ and nothiing about him literally looking at little kids butts...

palm. oh my god. i thought it was bad with hisoka but for another adult to ‘like’ gon?? i could have excused it as like- ‘oh you know, it just is part of his character, hes not meant to be likeable!’ BUT NO!!!!! because theres ANOTHER ONE!!!  they could have so tottally written around it too. (just throwing out random ideas here) could have made it that she an older sister and gon reminded her of her deceased brother? or it could have that she wanted him to jsut hang out iwth her becaue she has no other freinds (and that she just disliked killua, thats why she didnt ask him). 

but a date????? and then what also made me annoyed was that nobody had a problem with it?? i know i know, killua, right? but his annoyance wasnt that she was an ADULT, it was that she would hurt gon because shes creepy. 

cougars. i dont even know if anyone remembers this scene, its around the same time theyre living with palm. G+K are working out i think and K asks if hes ever been on a date before. 

(not totally accurate quotes, jsut what im trying to remember)

‘sure i am! with aunt mito’ K is suprised at first, but then hes like ahh of course. then G starts talking about his other ‘dates’, all female boats would show up at whale island and, some of the older women (with a type for ‘younger men’ as he put it) would teach G (again, his words) ‘teach him all sorts of things’ in exchange for a tour from Gon.

AND LIKE?! HUH?!?!?! ADULTS??? WITH A KID? NOT ONLY THAT BUT GON IS TWELVE THEN SO HOW OLD WAS HE WHEN THAT HAPPENED???? killua is shocked and goes ‘just how expeirenced is this guy??’ again, nothing being like ‘huh. thats weird and not healthy’. i can brush this off as killua being a kid, though. 

there really isnt a point of this i just kind of needed a place to say this publicly because i literally havent seen anybody talking about this (but could be wrong)z

[The DragonBall fan boys have to be the grossest fan boys, and that's beating hentai fan boys. Under the cut because. Good fucking grief it's gross. If you're an actual Goku fan, i suggest avoiding this one. Goku isn't my favorite character, but I like him, and this made me want to tear off my own limbs and eat them.]

[So I'm absolutely not surprised that this kind of garbage is created and spewed by this fucking fandom, but this once again proves the fan boys of this series want to project SO HARD onto the characters to live out their gross little fantasies with fictional characters. Which you know. Fine. But theyre doing it this time by tearing a character to ABSOLUTE SHREDS to do it. So they come up with this. That somehow, the most loyal and probably borderline asexual (demisexual maybe? His libido isnt fucking high guys thats obvious and he isnt a damn horn dog) character bangs all the "attractive" women, leaves his wife--who yes is written like shit but is attractive as well and he fucking LOVES HER as the fan boys and writers of at least Super conveniently forget--and has...a couple more kids with three different women? Like this is so fucking nasty I don't know where to BEGIN.

Like...fuck. the art is nasty and hyper-sexualizes at least Vados with big tiddies and her nipples showing through her wedding dress in one image.

Then there's the fucking ChiChi abuse. And you know. I'm not the biggest fan of how ChiChi is written, and I know this is a staple for the fan boys. Toriyama and Toyotaro really just made her a walking, awful stereotype like they've done with Bulma. But good grief. The "artist" first of all is wishy washy with her with this...fucking weird idea of ChiChi being okay with Goku shacking up with Vados, and serving them in bed? Like there is so much wrong with that from the obvious to like some gross societal ideas that once a woman reaches a certain age she's only worthwhile in a servile role. Unless they look like Bulma that is, who abuses the dragonballs to maintain her youth a d appearance BUT you get me. And despite that, the artist still has Beerus kill her for some reason? Because of course. And then the picture they have of her above the milk jar that I imagine is supposed to be her urn (even though I'm pretty sure a Hakai leaves nothing behind but why am I even trying to find a shred of something that is potentially accurate to the lore in this, when this is already steaming hot garbage and the lore is inconsistent anyway) is of her being angry. Like...fucking God. The idea that Goku doesn't love ChiChi is atrocious and flat out wrong, and he would NEVER select a picture like that to honor her. But I guess at this point who fucking cares because he's brought his hot angel mommy into their marriage home, so who cares about a little more disrespect, right? And that's not mentioning how the rest of his family is just a-okay with this.

I don't even know what to say about Heles and the Zeno baby. Like....wtf. you were fully into this Vados idea but now he's having a kid with Heles who he....literally never talked to. I'm not sure he ever really saw her.

I'm honestly a little surprised Bulma isn't somehow included in this atrocity. I say a little because she's probably not because that would mean taking their king Vegeta's wife from him and we can't have that. Also like...what does it say about the fan boys' masculinity when they want to make their Shonen anime into a literal, raunchy soap opera rather than a series about overpowered warriors fighting evil? Idk but that's not very manly....🙄🙄🙄 (disclaimer: I don't actually care about that kind of thing and men can absolutely enjoys soap operas; I only bring it up because they care about their very fragile masculinity being challenged). I mean these are probably the same people that whine and bitch about the filler in Z that's by and large actually not bad but stan everything Super has to offer, even the absolutely trash filler.

This pervasive shit is what makes it so hard to be a fan of this series, especially as a girl who grew into a woman watching this series since she was 6. And like yeah. Sure. Toriyama wasn't writing this shit for us. The target audience was boys. But damn. I know Toriyama and apparently Toyotaro are a lost cause on the sexist front, but it would be really nice if the fans didn't take their sexism and dial it up to 9000.]

i'm from a socialist country that's doing well despite the US sanctioning us & i've been reading stuff from western socialists & i'm very confused about their stances on men as a class. socialist leaders in the past have written about how women's rights are attributed to sex-based oppression & males so idk why these twitter socialists are saying things like this: twitter(.)com/TeyaLogos/status/1522247254735613953 twitter(.)com/endsanctions/status/1522343515824345088 both are trans-women

i love how the first one is pretending "maleness" has absolutely nothing to do with sex at all and i love the repitition of this lie that modern day capitalism is what invented misogyny and that before then we were in some utopia where men were never ever misogynistic in any way. it doesnt even seem like they understand their own arguments either bc they cant give a good argument here, theyre just trying to redefine words and reframe reality so that they dont have to accept themselves as also part of an oppressor class

first of all THANK YOUUU~ to 🌶 anon

i am so flattered other ppl read my LONG ASS ask,,,, i hope you enjoyed it~

i took some time to rest (aka i fueled my introverted battery and baked a cake,,, gave it away (dont ask, i felt like baking), showered, watched some tv, ordered pizza and am now chillin on my couch hehe) and now i feel very talk active sooo here i am ONCE AGAIN

AND @shanice-1104 U ARE SO RIGHT

ITS ME,,,,IM THE SIMP (intelligent people are just so😫),, I AM INDEED OPEN FOR A SUGGAR- I MEAN FOR A DOCTOR TO PAY FOR MY NEEDS 😁😁😁😁😁

YALL SEE THEM CALLING ME DEAR AND BABE‼️‼️‼️ AND TELLING ME I SHOULD REST‼️‼️AND HOW THEY LOVE MY IDEAS‼️‼️‼️‼️ THE PRAISEEEE THE PRAISEE

anyone wanna be my yamqn!beomgyu but without the yandere 💗🥹🤌🏻

and what is a turn off…

like i said i am one kinky bitch… which actually literally no one i know personally knows😭

but i have some no gos and also some unpop opinions aaand this is the perf opportunity to just talk abt them i think its fun

so one thing i find rlly off putting is ddbg😟

or age play.. it makes me a little uncomfortable cause sometimes it feels like they’re sexualizing things that should be kept innocent and not be smth that has to do with … well sex, in my opinion and also THAT LACTATION THING BC ITS THERE TO FEED BABYS (with women) AND THATS WEIRD ON ITS OWN SO WHY WOULD U LIKE IT FOR MEN ????

and i know many people like roleplay but ill be honest, i never get the appeal of it, it kind of just puts me OUT of the mood immediately when i read it in fics or someone mentions it..

and exhibitionism, i do not understand the appeal of doing it in public for example, i can see why the ✨forbidden✨ aspect might be fun but in general i do not like the idea of random people seeing smth so intimidate and i also always feel bad for people who maybe notice it 💀

what i do find interesting and fun..

is somnophilia… and the thing is its kind of risky and a lot of people dislike it

but i think with the right circumstances it can be so nice?!

first of all having a partner you trust and have talked it through with completely! all the limits and what you do like/want

and then i saw this idea of having little necklaces, since it could take away some of the fun of having to personally ask your partner the night of, if they consent.. bc it could take away the suprise for example,, but generalizing and saying its always okey isnt great either… bc maybe ur in a bad mood or had a shit day and dont feel like it at all… so those necklaces could be customized to say yes or no or smth and indicate if the partner consents to it on that night or not

i think that just makes it a little safer for misunderstandings NOT to happen!

what i like abt it is the idea of waking up to your partner pleasuring you, or think your partner is so needy at night but they dont wanna disturb you so it just opens a lot of possibilities and i think its fun and maybe exciting which is what kinks are supossed to be i believe!

and what i RLLY like is marking up my partner i srsly love it (an obsession of mine here we go-)

i dont like it in the childisch way of having an obvious hickey on your neck and then flaunting it at school like youre THE DUDE… it feels a bit immature tbh

i love it in the way of (and i have written this a bit ago, explaining to my ex why i like it so much)

“i dont want others to see, i just wanna look at my work at the end of the night, making a mental image and the next time they look in the mirror they’ll be reminded of what we did”

which is also why i have a soft spot for thighs, hands or wrists, collarbones, lower bellys, backs and chests/boobs… theyre my fav places to mark up and i just love the idea of cuddling with my partner, counting all the hickeys or bite marks i left and recalling memories, the idea of them knowing i “own” them in the sense of theyre mine and mine only to ✨see✨ (although in general im not rlly possessive and don’t get jealous easily) so i can even bite their thigh for example and im the only one who’ll know (like our lil secret) or maybe leaving a cute lil hickey on their wrist and next time i play with their hands fingers i can see my mark- oftentimes when i find someone insanely attractive and their collarbones and neck show (in a photo (maybe a nude- for example) the idea of me being able to ruin or corrupt the beautiful sight with bitemarks makes my heart go 💗💗💗 and me in general 🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵

yeah i def got carried away AGAIN. i even wrote this in my notes so i wont get distracted and delete everything… and now i have completely exposed myself, everyone be careful i might bite ;)

-❄️ (feelin a bit spicy today now are we)

that sounds restorative. glad to hear about it ❤️ but i can't imagine going through the effort to bake or cook something just for someone else like that could never be me. i too need a yamqn gyu which is probably why i prefer him to tyun lmao

and omg y'all are blinded by the doctor title. i don't have shit to my name. my 5 years younger brother makes around three times my salary lol you only make good money out of being a doctor in america i swear

i totally get the ddbg and age play thing. like i get it the appeal to some extent like being taken care of and spoiled (is that the appeal? idk) but i just find it icky when the "baby" character can't speak or they have very obviously child-like mannerisms. it grosses me out. i've seen more than a couple fics of that type around felix lmao

and yeah lactation both ways freak me out but especially on males. i don't remember if i've written female lactation for iyym or not but if i have it was only to increase the crazy factor of felix (says I who writes noncon scenes)

roleplay is tricky because in real life i don't think i could ever take it seriously and in fics it wouldn't be roleplay it would just be the characters being the actual roles like teacher/student etc. but maybe if i tried it in real life i'd like it? idk i think i'd just laugh

oh man exhibitionism is definitely a kink that only belongs to the fics for me. i may have done a couple of things in public before but that wasn't because i was into it. i just didn't have a place to do it lmao. but getting caught is THE WORST (which i did like 3 times lmao)

somnophilia (with consent if it's in real life) is such a good concept. it's like the feeling you get when you wake up from a wet dream but better lol. but it does have it's drawbacks like morning breath and maybe having sweated through the night 😂

yesss the necklaces are also sooo good for the free use kink. like if you put the necklace on, it lets your partner know that they can just grab you and fuck your brains out whenever they want

for marks i like it for both ways honestly. the sweet one you mentioned and the "mine" aspect but the mine aspect is only for the fics again. i'd never intentionally mark my partner for the world to see that would be mortifying lmao (i did it once accidentally and it really was mortifying :'D)

ok but what if i want you to answer all the questions for the lost npcs you havent answered yet.... what then? :'D

well your wish is my command!!!!

under cut cause Long

2. Do you find it easy to create NPCs? Why or why not?

i have so much experience creating characters between original fiction, video games, art, and ttrpgs that making characters is extremely easy for me

3. Do you build settings/encounters or NPCs first?

well with lost it was more setting/encounter just because it was supposed to be a short shot so the small, contained setting and murder mystery aspects were "more important" than the npcs. but once we realized it was gonna be long running, the npcs got a lot more fleshed out. brownbird was definitely a balance of character and mechanics when making her stuff

4. Do you usually have a strong sense of who an NPC, or do they tend to be kind of basic/there to serve a purpose?

my npcs go from "here is a basic vibe" to "oh god theyre calling the shots now" fairly quickly. like lizzie was NOT really a person in game 1 and then in game 2 she was like "im going to lash out and arrest hawk because im in love with divine" and i was like yes maam okay maam i guess this is part of the plot now?

6. How do you pick names for NPCs?

in lost theyre all named after country/folk/americana artists, songs, or bands!! it started as an easier way for me to name them (inspired by mr will orville) but then it became long running and the cast list started expanding and i was like oops!! but yeah its mostly Vibes

7. Do you ever use NPC generators?

honestly didnt know that was a thing

which npc is ...

9. The biggest flirt?

brandi has zero shame <333 shes the biggest lesbian but that will not stop her from flirting w men whether they are into women or not

10. The life of the party?

for regular parties, sarah, for Wild Parties, brandi

11. Most unique?

to stop myself from saying brandi again. i think kelseys stuff is .....,, Interesting. they have the kind of backstory i wouldve written when i was 12

13. Most likely to succeed?

well waylon ... Has succeeded? his methods of getting there were :) its hard to name another character because everyone is in lost cause theyre fucked up in some way <3

14. Most likely to be on a reality show?

sarah would simply thrive with the attention and it would Not make her toxic because she would not understand or care that thats what is supposed to happen

15. Most outspoken?

sarah!!!! my girl has no filter (future flashback my beloved)

16. Most evil?

the jack of course :))

17. Best dressed?

probably kelsey. i think theyre the only one who takes advantage of waylons offer to buy the squad nice clothes. overdressed nonbinary rights. also latrowe <333 his god mom makes sure he is a very fancy little coyote

18. Friendliest?

sarah or scruggs <33 also kitten but she is. 7. and my baby <33

19. Most changed?

can i saw latrowe. is that cheating. okay real answer waylon or scruggs :))

20. Least likely to care what superlative they get?

hawk lmaoo. everyone else would pretend not to care but definitely care, or would care soooo much. hawk would simply be like. this is. dumb.

21. Which NPC is the easiest for you to roleplay? Why?

in the bit of screentime he's had, scruggs

22. Which NPC is the most difficult to roleplay? Why?

honestly probably lizzie? she's just sooo different from me. like trying to balance the Restrained Stoic with the Absolute Messy Bitch Disease is. something im working on. she's VERY much her own person but im still figuring out how to inhabit that person

24. Which NPC is YOUR favorite and why?

thats so hard ToT maybe hawk? i have unfortunately inflicted him with Sad Boi Disease so so fast. bea has received so much psychological damage from high insight checks on him <33

26. Which NPC is YOUR least favorite and why?

hmmmm. i do find things to genuinely like about most of my npcs? either dr clark or colter, not because colter doesnt have interesting stuff, he's just sooo not my type

27. Do you have a favorite NPC (ally or enemy) to use in combat?

well i've only used brandi in combat because im REALLY not a combat person. but she's. insane <3 yall did such a good job kicking her ass but she is a vengeance paladin/arcane archer fighter/wild card rogue who has +12 stealth and her max damage in a turn is 217 <33

29. Are there any NPCs you wish you could play as a PC one day?

if i had to choose one as a long running pc it would probably be scruggs but i WOULD have to break him mechanically more <3 playing brandi as a long term pc might. rot my brain.

30. Bonus question! Answer any that you haven’t been asked, or talk about any NPC you want!

one of the players has a little bit of info about brandi backstory :)) <33

thinking of house of leaves at work again and im at the chapter where they start the "official" exploration. these people are dumb. the troperrific quality of the documentary is getting more blatant. three supposedly experienced men went headfirst into a disorienting maze of a house and they didnt even bring a compass until karen points it out. their expedition is doomed. the book spelled it out for us. not even a step and they already fought over rights to own the place.

there is a supernatural phenomenon and their first thought is to conquer it and put a name on it as if its an empty depopulated piece of land ready for harvest and development. its a criticism of some of the unsavory tendencies of the men's field of work and interest. photojournalism and nature exploration. profiting off tragedies and conflict from around the world, being hailed as a brave voice of the voiceless to capture some conflict in the third world, when theyre actually just providing photos for people in the imperial core to gawk at and feel guilt over without questioning if their government had a hand on it happening, further fueling a white saviorist complex and poverty tourism. meanwhile in the case of nature exploration, getting awards and grants and speaking opportunities to explore places that are labeled as exotic and unknown, erasing the indigenous populations who have lived there for generations and maybe even help them explore. the minotaur's gonna kill them.

im sorry, i kinda got off tangent here.

and, there might be a touch criticism on gender too? because we saw karen on her own little sidequest relying on mystical knowledge and superstition on feng shui and she was the one who points out the compass thing and was implied to left the house for good (or to disappear in the house?) before it could actually harm her, and by extension, her kids. so far, she's the one with the rational take on everything. but the way she goes about it, im afraid the author might have went the road of mystifying women's knowledge and insight to prove that karen is better than all the three men in how she reacts.

and there's also a little bit of passage about karen's explorations. is this referring to her affair or did she secretly traversed the maze without navidson noticing?

and another bit that supports my crack theory that zampano is actually johnny truant, johnny wrote down how a woman cheated on her boyfriend for him and it coincidentally happens when he's trying to translate a passage that was written a few paragraphs before karen's affair was revealed. though this could be another one of his tangents that tries to relate everything in the manuscript with his own daily life