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real-fire-emblem-takes · 2 months

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i wish i knew how to make a fire emblem bc... game ideasce. waugh.

brief summary: emotionally detached lesbian leader of a mercenary group saves a sweet peppy manakete woman (who does look like shes 20 and not 11) and ends up getting hauled into her adopted unadopted father's capitalistic quest to conquer all the (lycian alliance like) other nations on his continent. manakete woman is like hey um this is fucked up why are you lostening to this guy and the leader is like well i have mysterious reasons. they do a few war crimes before they realize Why : evil cult of guys who wanna revive a fell dragon are working in the distant Hugeass Empire to do just that and need manaketes to do this... but they scared them all off by existing so theyre trying to bribe people to do it. the warring alliance are too busy at war to do that, the nation of knockoff laguz are too busy giving a shit about other shapeshifters, and the other less defined nations dont have the manpower to capture a fuckimg dragon. the merc leader realizes this and as she has become a little gay but mostly besties w her manakete friend, she begins working against her father unfather to stop this shit from happening. she unconquers the other nations in the alliance but given she and her band defeated and killed the leaders of the nations they have no leader and given her band is now the strongest... people just start following the merc leader anyway. it helps that most of the leaders of the allied nations were assholes making the commonfolk do battle for their personal gain, and the merc leader does her own battling. merc leader lesbian is crowned the first queen of this new united kingdom (against her will) and is bullied into marrying Someone bc thats how royalty works and she chooses someone from her merc band Of Course.

20 year timeskip.

the new nation has become a safe haven for manaketes and all sorts of outcasts as Her Gay Highness has worked tirelessly to make sure the people who made her queen dont regret it because she has thinly veiled anxiety issues about her worth as a person. thanks guy (the lord who made her conquer in the first place) who adopted this war orphan from the streets and then unadopted her when his wife finally bore him a child. oh speaking of children given its been 20 years, characters who youve paired can have kids. but you gotta pair em before the timeskip, and only two characters always have a kid and thats the merc leader and the manakete girl best friend (gay). hey remember that huge fuckoff empire to the east? Yeah theyve launched a fullscale war against the laguz nation to just force them to hand over any manaketes after the evil cult installed a 14 year old puppet emperor. the laguz nation goes Ah Fuck Ah Shit Ah Fuck and asks their good buddies the combined kingdom to help them which they Do. but by the time they get there, the losses are extreme and the king of the laguz nation is dying. the ex merc leader helps his successor into her role and the two women go "oh yeah we're going to fucking destroy the evil empire" and then they do. The war is hard and sucks but eventually they fight their way to the evil cult. a few things happen : 1 the manakete who the ex merc leader has been besties with for 20 years is the DAUGHTER of the fell dragon the cult is trying to resurrect. the merc leader freaks out, and because of her trauma about people she loved abandoning her, kicks the manakete woman out of the band and Also Take Your Damn Kid. and your spouse unless the spouse is the merc leader in which case a truly heartwrenching cutscene plays. 2 : the cult members immediately find snd capture the manakete woman and are preparing to kill her kid and use the blood of the fell dragon to revive it. the merc leader hears about this and decides the final battle has to start Now to save them because holy shit that was a mistake obviously theyre not working together. 3 : yknow who WAS working w the cult? all the nobles who hate the merc leaders unnoble blood. so the cult know theyre there. whoops. they fight the cult but just barely lose, and fhe manakete woman's kid is Slain. the fell dragon rises, not bc of the blood, but bc the fell dragons only daughter got So Pissed. turns out the fell dragon isnt actually that cruel, not in life anyway, but given how he was revived by anger snd not by true love he comes back Wrong and the cult descend on him and tear him apart and eat his flesh & use his bones as weapons. oh they dont worship him they want to use him to kill all shapeshifters and anyone who works against them forever. they can, however, use this pissed off manakete by casting a spell on her and having her fight her former friends. Huge fuckoff battle. It ends w the lesbian merc leader slaying the leader of the cult and, agonizingly, the friend she saved forever ago. the manakete returns to normal once the mortal blow is dealt, and thanks the mercenary leader for saving her once again, and begs her to remain a peaceful and kind leader for the rest of her life. she dies. the merc leader is Only Anguish. the world is saved at what cost?

epilogue : the merc leader rules until she dies, ensuring that the still-combined nations of the west, the newly managed empire of the east, and the reconstructed laguz kingdom to the south are all on good terms and recovering well from the war. manaketes establish their own nation after being given land from each nation where they meet to own for themselves. the leader of it is revealed to be the manakete bestie's other child she had borne RIGHT before the war began who she had only implied existed in her supports w her eldest child and a few others. merc leader leaves behind a vast and tumultuous legacy, but her child rises to keep her ideals alive and make sure nobody can accuse her of having no worth. she chose peace and love and thats what is important at the end of the day.

various paired endings. if the merc leader and manakete bestie got married (the canon route but w/e), the merc leader never remarried and vowed to see her wife in anime chess heaven. its very gay. end credits.

oh i forgot to mention. there is an avatar character who can marry anyone who likes that gender as every character now has a canon sexuality. the avatar character is the m/cs childhood friend who does nothing in the story but is Kind Of Cool. goodnight

👀 love the concept

#there is actually a half finished plot of a hypothetical fe game in my drafts. i should finish it soon #long post #fe #fire emblem #i should make a tag for these #emblems beyond our reach

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prime-empires · 23 days

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BOOTING THIS BLOG UP TO LOWKEY RANT ABT DRS2 PART 1!!! SPOILERS AHEAD!!!

-the fight scenes? crazy. insane. love them.

-lloyd having panic attacks because of his visions is so real. hes destiny's fav and also he's their biggest hater.

-arin is autistic confirmed you can't tell me no? "am i missing a social cue here?" everyone else also did but YOU!! ARIN WHEN I GET YOU!!!!!

-im going to call cole a gay slur with all of the love in my heart. im so crazy abt that freak normal about that character

-bonzle being the spell is such good character growth to me. her whole little story with her meeting wu was heartwarming and she really grew on me as a character since we really didnt get to see her in s1.

-gandalaria is an icon whom i love. shes so goofy and silly and the scene looking for the potion after bonzle got captured was silly and killed the tension a tad, but PUPPY COLE. he was a pupy...

-sora helping arin to raise his spirits and keeping it a secret is actually good imo. i really hope theres not a soul shattering scene in pt 2 where she tells him she did it! (pleasepleaseplease dont make this happen i might cry actually)

-kai surpassing everyone and learning basic rising dragon was a good idea. he was the original main character before lloyds arc.

-KAI MY BELOVED MOTHERFUCKER YOU BETTER GET YOUR FUCKASS RED SELF BACK TO THE REAL WORLD RIGHT NEOW!!! ur not the main character anymore bestie...im so sorry

-jay mandated one minute cameo was so real i need my boy back in the gang. need more cole/jay interaction...give me the besties. the Boy Besties.

-"they got hungry and went to chena noodle house" so real. so so real and in character of jay and cole. theyre best friends your honor STOP SEPARATING THEM

Overall thoughts: holy SHIT!!! I genuinely didn't think Dragons Rising would keep my interest like it has. I've watched this fuckass show since I was like 11, and by GOD they're keeping it real. The fight scenes are beautifully animated, they're keeping the characterization as close to normal as possible (of course there will be differences, no one can deny it). The story is enthralling and I really, REALLY love it.

can we get cole introducing geo to jay when he comes back as his bf to confirm all of our "suspicions" (they are dating. i dont care) but pleasepleaseplease im begging. don't keep us in the dark ninjago team

#ninjago #ninjago dragons rising #ninjago dr spoilers #ninjago dr #ninjago dr part 2

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most-canon-non-canon-ship-poll · 9 months

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They don't even like each other

Why Sasusaku is shit - a submission-based essay, part 1/2

Sasusaku - a canon het ship from the Naruto and Boruto fandoms between Sasuke Uchiha and Sakura Hanako

sasuke has not and has NEVER had a shred of interest in sakura from the get-go. she continually harasses him and refuses to take his rejection as a no. later on in the series they try to kill each other at one point but sakura is still stupidly in love with him even though the dumbass instigated the killing attempt. he leaves her for dead at a later point toward the end of the series when they're literally fighting against a god lol. and STILL she tries to confess her love to him just for him to reject her once a-fucking gain. the series ends with him pushing her away. in the series sasuke's brother itachi has this gesture where he pokes sasuke on the forehead as a sign of distance- and sasuke does the same to sakura. SOMEHOW they end up together in the horrid sequel series boruto. but after allegedly knocking her up (which is a dubious topic in of itself which is a whole nother topic. but there are maternity doubts about their daughter sarada) he abandoned her to "go on a misson" for over 10 years. every time he is around her he looks like one of those animals in a really bad zoo that wants to ram itself against the glass in its enclosure. IT'S PRACTICALLY OUTRIGHT STATED HE AND SAKURA HAVE NEVER EVEN KISSED!! also this doesn't factor into how much the ship itself sucks but the shippers are some of the most homophobic pieces of shit i have encountered in any anime fandom <3 i hate them so much and i hate their shitty ship even more!

okay. listen. this has been done to death but HOLY FUCK. literally the reason sasuke even married her despite having NO INTEREST FOR THE ENTIRE SERIES was because she HARASSED HIM SO MUCH that he FINALLY GAVE IN JUST TO SATISFY HER. she manipulated him REPEATEDLY. she gave up on him after he left and tried to manipulate naruto into not going after him. they have NO CHEMISTRY. NO ROMANTIC BUILDUP. SASUKE IS A FLAMING HOMOSEXUAL. THEY HAD A KID?? THAT HE ABANDONED FOR THIRTEEN YEARS???? THEIR ONE DATE LASTED TWO AND A HALF MINUTES??????? THEY PROBABLY HAVEN'T EVEN KISSED?????????????? KISHIMOTO DIDN'T EVEN TRY TO WRITE A ROMANCE. HE JUST ONE DAY SAID "OH YEAH BTW SASUSAKU IS A THING NOW" PROBABLY JUST TO APPEASE THE SASUSAKU FANS OUT THERE. NARUTO AND SASUKE HAD MORE ROMANTIC CHEMISTRY BUILT UP WITHIN THE FIRST FIVE EPISODES THAN SASUKE AND SAKURA DID IN THE WHOLE GODDAMN SERIES.

She was in love with him for the entire series. he thought she was fucking annoying. that never really changed but the author decided they should end up together at the end. they got married and had a kid and he went on a trip for the kid’s entire life. he had more interest in his best friend/rival/canon soulmate. the author can’t write women. i feel very bad for sakura it is not her fault her husband is gay.

lbr theyre both gay and in love with their besties

#propaganda #why [ship name] is shit #the (s)hit list #not a poll #anti sasusaku

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thekidsarentalright · 1 month

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atlas bestie i’m so genuinely terrified for my show after seeing last nights setlist… XO?!? GET BUSY LIVING?!?!?! SPIDEY?!?!?! every time we think they can’t get more unhinged they Do!! i’m the best kind of scared for my show bc it’s soonish and i feel like they’re abt to snipe me lmaooo 😅 between whatever tf pete was doing during get busy living and the whole spidey thing and xo with like… no warning. this is so much. like wtf else could they possibly do and why are they the scariest lil guys ever and how are we meant to survive this??

also not to get emotional but that speech before spidey made me kinda tear up! like this band genuinely wasn’t supposed to make it this far and they Did and patrick overcame so much self doubt and just 😭😭😭 he’s playing songs he wrote for a spiderman cartoon at a SOLD OUT SHOW at madison square garden with his best friends!! never thought i’d be crying over spidey but that happened lol… sorry for the rambling but the patrick emotion is so strong rn, everything he said abt impostor syndrome was super fuckin validating and just. how do they do that? how does fob always do that?? i’m gonna be an emotional wreck at my show and the 8 ball is Not gonna help lmao

(alsooooo this is hella late but AHHH CONGRATS ON GETTING ALLIE!!! <3 u won SO hard fr fr!!!!! genuine question, how did u not like… collapse when that started? like anything from soul punk is insane but especially that song?? holy shit 😭)

- 🧋 anon

GODDD BFF I KNOW RIGHT??? the madison square garden setlist was sooooo crazy and tbh last nights was too like.... i swear each show theyre just getting more insane somehow i am SO scared in the best way too for my next show and u are in my thoughts for yours 😭 like every time i think there isnt more they could do, they find something so like. truly we're in for it for these last 9 shows!!!! we are not surviving!!!!!

also YEAHH WAUGH that speech made me soooo emotional too do Not be sorry for the rambling bc literally the fact this band was supposed to just be a fun little side project and is now This big, to where patrick can play his scoring "day job" songs to sold out audiences of thousands for Fun because he Wants to for his passion project is just. so much??? seeing him, like, overcoming imposter syndrome in real time??? it is so so sweet and inspiring literally how do fob always manage to be sooooo healing and beautiful and inspirational i can't handle it!!! manifesting thee most insane emotional 8 ball for you tbh fkjsnfds

alsooo AUGHHH THANK U i still cant believe i got allie live like. tbh idk how i didnt collapse either i think i was just in such shock it was happening 😭 i remember turning to my mom and sister w my jaw fucking dropped repeating "THIS IS SOUL PUNK??!!??!" over and over... he was so insane for that

#okay also tho u mentioning ur show makes me need to know what ur ideal 8 ball would be so i can actually manifest it for u...#asks #🧋 anon

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razberrypuck · 11 months

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ep 102 liveblog

jehfjegdg thank you for this intro condi

NO THEYRE LEAVING ALREADY?????

GRYFFON 🙏🙏🙏

JAHSJWUDHSH "chip, I can't lie, tell him he did good out there"

chip flat out lying so hard it made grizz break character

"because the beyond section is actually navy ran" "whaaaaat D:????? noooooo!!!!"

"its government subsidized fucking mystery cave. fucking sure I guess."

"she told her no" "thanks for listening, gryffon" "no problem"

QUEEN 👏👏👏👏

"okay queen is being based right now" YEAHH YOU GET IT GILL

"can I just insight check queen" JWHWHDHAGDY

QUEEN I LOVE YOU <33333

jay: I was right to be angry, right? she was kinda making me feel bad about it

gillion: you reacted more than -- MORE than fairly

chip: I have a lot of opinions, none of them matter. I'm not gonna tell you how to feel.

gill giggling at chip going "I'll show you my hidden darkness" we love visible character development he would've gotten ready to throw down if this were early campaign

"no, it's like a metaphor" "a meta for what?"

gillion quietly trying to comfort jay im not okay..............

gillion: I'm just gonna be straight with you guys, if they fucking....murked a god of the undersea or something, or disrupted the natural order of life, I might be up for a little war."

jay and chip immediately being down to join the war on the side of the undersea hello???? they weren't lying these captains really are ride or die

hey actually I want to talk abt how MUCH having gillion be their moral backbone (whether they like it or not) has changed chip and jay. I don't have the words right now but I want to talk about it. you get it.

GRIZZ DO NOT BRING UP EDYN HOW COULD YOU

OHHH GRIZZ HOW FUCKING COULD YOU

OHHHH ITS AVA'S HANDWRITING ISNT IT

FUCK OFF FUCK OFF FUCK OFF >:[

" 'your face makes it look like a good memory' and I close her hand over the pin" GILLION TIDESTRIDER

gillion's trying so hard to bring jay comfort dude ohh my god. im so emotional over them.

JSJFJSH TAKING A SAFETY SNIFF

"he's not evil. he's just angry." "and a dick." "and a dick."

"we've got an arlin to find" "well, I was thinking first, maybe we could... see what was going on with edyn" OH CHIP. EVERYONES BEEN GOING THROUGH FAMILY SHIT AND HE KNOWS HOW WORRIED GILLS BEEN OHH HE WANTS TO BRING GILL TO HIS SISTER CHIPPPPPPP

hes a little confused but he's got the spirit

oh chip picked up on gill changing the subject 👀

"okay. I'd like that." STOP GILLION YOU'RE GONNA KILL ME. hes forcing himself to be more open gillion I love you

EARLLLL

JAHDHSJD WALKS OUT IMMEDIATELY CALLING OUT DREY LOVE YOU EARL

BEST FRIEND????????

drey earl stole your bestie

chip and gillion suspicious of queen

give me finn please gillion go see your grandpa

FINN TIDESTRIDER

"the g-paw dap is the nose squeeze" AWH

NOOO THEY EXPIDITED IT GRANDPA COME BACK

enza <333

"I dap her up as soon as she comes through the portal" "I give her a refreshing earl juice drink" "I give her a hug and I say hi" enza just join the crew fr they love you

JAHRHEJ CHARLIE

THE FUCKING COMPASS

OHHHH CHIP. HIS DEEPEST DESIRE IN THIS EXACT MOMENT IS TO HELP REUNITE GILL AND EDYN FUCK OFFFFFFF

grizz what are you doing.

PERMANENTLY INCREASE HIS STRENGTH BY ONE??????? HELLO???????

GRIZZ

THE FUCKING SUN DREAM AGAIN

YEAHHHH JAY YES JAY

JAY HETEROCHROMIA POG???????? HOLY SHIT??????????

JAYYYYYYYYY 👏👏👏👏👏👏

"I'd like to go whaling" "gillion just looks at you until you stop having the idea" "okay nevermind I don't want to go whaling"

oh jay wants to call ollie :[

the fact that zero could see the whole fight. dude. that's kinda sick.

"did we take you to the BLOCK?????" "ollie I'm happy you're home." jsjdnsfbfj

"they call me uncle rizz ferin" JDJFJSJFHHSH DREY

"I cast protection of evil and sex on myself"

JAFHSGDHS BIZLY AND CHARLIE FREAKING OUT

oh they really didn't think about their disguised huh

AMANDA RINN???? AMANDA RINN????????

"we're the boobatross"

blonde chip with big pants, pants elemental, and jeay ferin

lionel starr, jortstorm, and gene applebottom

JULIAN!!!!!!!!!!! JULIAN MY BELOVED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

CAPTAIN AMANDA RINN

GILL DONT GILL DONT GILL DONT

"lionel starr has never been married he doesn't believe in it"

HOW DID THEY FUCK THIS UP SO BAD?????????

NOOO THEY GOT ARRESTED

jahdhdhf amanda I love you

"what do you want me to say to her, I forgot I have the message spell" "move on, he's dead"

gillion head in hands

JAHDHSJD GILL KISSED HIM ON THE FOREHEAD

gillion's better at lying than chip?????

"they don't like you, but you get through"

gill immediately assuming edyn must be mad at him :((((

"happy low-tide to ya"

oh she hasn't come back.

oh she's letting him use her callnch........

please please please

"hiiiiiiii. it's, um... hi, edyn, it's me, gillion. um, just... wanted to give you a call. I know you might've seen the number and thought it was weird. um, but, in case you're by the phone right now and are just letting it ring out or something, 'cuz you thought it was work and are quitting, I'm just gonna scream really loud in case you're somewhere nearby -- [gillion screaming] -- in case you just hear that and you wanna run into the room and pick it up, 'cuz I know you can hear the voice message, um... okay, um, well... I just wanted to tell you that I, um, kinda sorta broke my phone, um... 'cuz I was really scared. and. I know you're okay, but I hope you're okay. um... I know you're out there doing really really big stuff... but... your little brother really misses you, especially lately. and... would give a lot to hear your voice again, um... I hope the gods bring us together soon, and... I just wanted to tell you that chip, jay, and I, and all of the other riptide pirates are sailing into the black sea, and it's, um... it's pretty dangerous stuff. I've got no doubt that we'll come back, and... sooner or later, our paths will cross, I just... I pray that it's sooner. I was... really upset. but. I think I can understand now, if you gave me a chance. And, um... I hope that this is the last message that we leave for each other. love you a medan, edyn. nope. that's nothing. love you a -- love you a m-mu-mi-gh-gu-mm- bye."

his deepest desire is still for gill to see edyn

northern sea. that's where the capital is. she's in the undersea.

"it's like if you found out your plug was a cop, but he's still your plug" I love you gillion tidestrider

"narc to narc" JAHDHWKJF GILLION

"we're the types of characters that would start making noises to comfort each other"

yooo cave song (not normal about how, once again, gillion is the one to start the song stuff)

it's a portal, not an actual gate. interesting.

the black sea is just one massive dead zone isn't it. god.

THE TREE. THE TREE. ITS THE TREE.

FUCKING GOOP BEETLES. GOOP MONSTERS.

#jrwi riptide #jrwi spoilers #jrwi riptide spoilers #jrwilb

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unsleepingtales · 1 month

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Happy holidays from all of us here on fantasy high tumblr.

Coming back to the top having just finished the ep. I feel insane. ANYWAY.

Our name is ally brennan beardsley mulligan!!

I AM FRIENDS WITH PETE WENTZ FROM FALL OUT BOY WHO IS WANDA CHILDA’S (RECENT) EX BOYFRIEND???????

Ok glad we’re talking about spies tongue curse. Bc what was that

Oh my god this episode is three hours long

Sklonda what’s your goal here bestie

I’m really distracted rn so not many notes are being taken I’m definitely gonna have to rewatch this episode over the weekend

But god all the soil stuff is weird

Something in his office??? Something like maybe the mirror where baron first appeared??

Yeah just throwing energy into external things to avoid feeling your own feelings. Is a thing that happens.

THANK YOU RIZ please please talk about the students freaking out

Oh godddddd the soil it all comes back to minerals and soil somehow ok

Diamondized blood 😭

I love tired Adaine she’s trying her bestttt

Goddd the bad girls are everything to me. They are every triad ever.

You’re giving the identity spell a stroke guys

Holy SHIT Beardsley

Oooooooh DOME COLOR CHANGE

Saint Kristen Applebees motherfuckers

Okay that’s horrifying!

Ok so that was fun

Zac is SO smart

‘Gorgug….. so good’

Godly whale fall……… Zac Oyama your mind

It’s like burning man 😭

Burning Man as Whale Fall. Maybe I’ll write the paper.

Planeshift is a spell guysssss you have used it before

The way he talks to her makes her mad!!!!!

Cassandraaaaaaaaaa

Gorgug <3

Your enemy the beekeeper!

THANK YOU FOR TALKING ABOUT IT

Yeah Fabian probably does not want to go to Aelwyn’s house

Riding a scooter. Classic Adaine.

Devastating.

OOF

Yeesh.

Yeah the last friends Aelwyn had we’re not good!

🚨🚨 ZAYN MENTION 🚨🚨 Zayn my best friend Zayn Darkshadow 🖤🖤🖤

Brennan’s physicality as Aelwyn is so funny

Aelwyn and Fabian leave it alone!!! Don’t!!

What? No! No! What? What? What? No!

One thing about Ally Beardsley is they’re gonna talk about Joe Biden.

They’re good crimes? You’re having fun with the crimes? Come do crimes with us!

Aelwyn librarian era??

Holy shit Emily

What the fuckkkkkk

Absolute dream terrorist Figueroth Faeth

Gertie my beloved!

Dark red honey oooh

Kristen x Gertie let’s goooooo

HELLO????????

OKAY I GUESS THATS HAPPENING FANTASTIC LOVE THAT FOR BOTH OF THEM

Also that makes Gertie campaigning for Kipperlilly 100x funnier

Whattttttt

I need fic. STAT.

Yayyyy a bit of financial breathing room for Riz

Mazey!

My mind’s still back in the cafeteria I can’t wait to see fantasy high tumblr’s response to Kristen and Gertie

Do NOT get tracker. NO.

Oooh so we finally have info on the bylaws

Where did you get wanda childa’s resume???????

He’s really committed to the neck tattoo thing huh.

They’re all so good. They’re just good.

Gorgug!!!!

THEY FINALLY REALIZED!!!!

We’ve been sooooooo intense about it I wasn’t even sure if they had realized lol

Ok! Nephew. Interesting.

Henry helped build Grix. Ok.

Henryyyyyyyyy

God we can’t trust any of the teachers really. That’s so depressing.

God if only you could actually just go let’s end the meeting right there every time you were uncomfortable

The ENTIRE family is going yeah

THEYRE BRINGING ZAYNNNNNNNN

I’m so glad they’re bringing Zayn my best friend in the world Zayn Darkshadow

His art makes me so fucking happy.

Ooh good thinking Siobhan

Telemaine oh boy

Oh god

Gilear time!!!!

(haunted and suspicious)

Awww she called him dad

Sometimes Brennan just says shit

He really had to get rid of the puppy fast

She killed my god- NO- fine. She helped my god die.

That actually makes so much sense. Once things are good after they’ve been bad for ages you don’t know who you are without the bad things

It’s me fig! From the phone!

(all talking at once about Kristen’s kisses)

What

What??

Babe how could we not clown

RIZBERT

We could have been calling you rizbert this entire time

WHAT????

Telemaine leave Riz alone

RUVINA?????? Winter in fallinel for the first time in eons????? Ruvina maybe??

Oh yeah the name of the religion is literally wolfSONG

Fantasy Hamilton

It’s so funny that they’re calling her bee girl bc there’s an npc named bee boy in my current campaign that we all love SO much

Aelwyn. Babe.

Gorgug white knuckling the railing to avoid Telemaine

There is NOT an option for under 18s on any kink dating app

Sandra Lynnnnnnnn I would be so good to you you don’t even know

Okay but wasn’t Gilear cursed way before he put the armor on???? This is what keeps tripping me up. Gilear’s life was like this before.

My only daughter in the world 😭😭😭

Fig. Fig honey. That’s not. That’s.

Fig and Sandra Lynn. They fuck me up so bad.

Sandra Lynn Faeth the woman that you are………….

Zayn is coming to the church! Zayn Darkshadow my best friend in the world!!!

SPY’S TONGUE

Ohhhhhhhh okay

I love that it’s canon that Aelwyn and Zayn are wizard buddies who worked for Kalina together

Using devil’s nectar too much causes you to to believe your own lies. Fabulous.

Divinity is so weird

Name heist?

Winter Break! I believe in you!!

Kristen. Kristennnnnn

Narnia Burning Man 😭

Oh god

Oh god!

She will be risen!

It is SO cold

OUCH

Guys what the hell is going on

Yeah of COURSE she’s deeply bothered. Kristen is doing the same thing to her that she did earlier. They bother each other. They need each other to understand.

This kills me. This kills me so deeply.

Ohhh thank you for thinking about Ruvina

They’re BEST FRIENDS

They’re rolling initiative to decide who goes first in secret sylvan. I’m gonna fucking cry.

ADAINE THATS SO SWEET

Fabian. Fabian this is actually so nice. Please think about this. It will make them not attack you. Adaine wanted to help you with your fear.

Fabian we know you can give good gifts

Murph is running a tight ship on secret sylvan

(attempted tearing noises)

That’s actually really nice

They’re tactical!!!!!!

I love this so much

That’s so nice oh my god Kristen you know Riz so well

They love each other so much

GORGUG HAD FIG IN SECRET SYLVAN. Be still my figgorgug heart.

Brennan stopppppppppp

The intense zoom on Ally doing this.

HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

Is she like me.

Zaynnnnnnn

Sorry I’m incredibly not normal about Zayn Darkshadow I’m sure you couldn’t tell from how I react when he has .5 seconds of screen time

Girl WHAT

God they’re good

Riz Gukgak!!

IS THIS WHERE CASSANDRA WAS MARRIED

Dig bitch!

Oooooooooooh baby

Adaine I love you

Oh fuck oh god oh fuck

Zayn nooooooooo

Oh god why

KRISTEN

The idea of watching the moon get fuller is really cool

Oh god

MIRRORS?

Somehow I completely forgot baron was in this episode. I was so distracted I forgot what was coming.

Awww Cassandra is protecting her paladin

Oh my god this is insane

Oh no oh no oh no

Don’t break a mirror don’t do that not right now not here

Oh my god?????

They’re married <3

BARON HELPING??!

BARON ART BARON ART BARON ART

Is Zayn okay :(

You can’t ALL go in the briefcase can you???

WARDING BOND 😭😭😭😭 oh my god I can’t handle that

Death bond <3

What the fuckkkkkkkkk

Hello???????

NAT 20 DEX SAVE FROM KRISTEN APPLEBEES

Where the fuck are they.

Ooooh fig’s bedroom art!

How did this happen.

BARON MINI NEXT WEEK

#fantasy high junior year #reactions #verbal component #zayn

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boycritter · 10 months

Note

okay holdon i have like nine million things i do. YOGURT!!! u can put anything in greek yogurt basically. i like to get the fruit ones like the eight little packs u can get of puddings and jello? those guys. and i take those and i put granola in them BAMB three food groups right there baby. sometimes i get the plain ones also and do a little make ur own. (maple syrup is rlly good in plain yogurt trust me).

smoothies are also really good cuz u can just like. keep adding things. and theyre real fast. and u get the fun activity points for the blending portion. get some frozen fruit some milk Some ice cream even. u can also put protein powder in these and if u get a good tasting one theyre awesome. but if u get a bad tasting one its fun because then u make the worst smoothie ever and have afun lil game of who can drink the most worst smoothie ever.

protein powder is ur best friend actually speaking of. gives u some energy and helps with the headaches for me personally

also soup. soup is easy especially if its the can ones and u can just kinda keep throwing things in there without fuckin it up too badly.

to make myself want to eat i like. come up with food combos that im curious would taste like together (rice and mushed up strawberries is the best thing on the planet btw)

granola bars are also ur bestie. they taste good and theyre fast to eat and no prep or cooking AND you can get chocolate covered ones

so basically like. little things that dont take too long to make so ur not rlly thinking about it. things you can just keep adding other food groups to. this was long

hearty you are a lifesaver holy shit!! everything online is directed at like. cancer patients or gymbros and i belong to neither of those categories

i used to be really into yogurt with stuff in it but the yogurt texture was too variable depending on how old it was and it was eugh. so now i am an oatmeal boy and it's basically the same with a more consistent texture

#save #i also like to put almond butter in my oatmeal bc !! extra fats which are good :)#peanut butter also works but i am a peanut butter hater bc the smell makes me nauseous

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suiana · 10 months

Note

and since u wanted an info dump abt ateez here are some random facts that float around in my head

hongjoong has a pet rock. yeah.

yeosang and wooyoung have the longest friendship in ateez bc they were friends since being bighit trainees together and left the company at the same time bc they wanted to debut together so badly :((

yeo and woo are also friends with txt yeonjun bc they were trainees along with him

yeonjun and san were friends in highschool

yeosang secretly left home to audition bc his parents didnt want him to

seonghwa hongjoong and san are ateez' demon line since whenever theyre on stage they have such strong stage presence as if a demon posessed them. atinys find it attractive. yes tjis is normal.

hongjoong isnt called the leader but the CAPTAIN since ateez are pirates lmao

the hala in halateez (the ateez in the other dimension called strictland) stands for hearts awakened, live alive

ateez original line up was 9 members

yeosang has a heart shaped birthmark on his right cheek

seonghwa LOVES lego

seonghwa is good at imitating the way animal crossing characters talk

jongho is one of the, if not best vocalists in kpop due to his huge vocal range

instead of trying to win, ateez filled up the loop holes in their storyline during the kingdom competion

wooyoung and skz changbin are besties 4ever

wooyoung and san have matching friendship tattoos 😭

yunho cried when hongjoong said they were going to dubai

seonghwa has a 65cm waist

jongho is TERRIFIED of bugs

yunho is the tallest in ateez

yunho and mingi know each other way before ateez

mingi really likes orange juice and even wrote a rap about orange juice when he was a trainee 💀💀

i hopw thats enough for now 😚

holy shit dude this was so hot of u

and who is this seonghwa AND WHY IS HIS WAIST SO TINY (I love men with small waists) (😈🔥)

#suiana's sinners #atiny anon

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winderlylandchime · 6 months

Note

1/2 And we are at 4x10, i should probably say that he did threaten with a lawsuit if the episode doesnt have Britin being cute/happy, he is literally one of us. HE SAW THE BEGINNING WHERE IT SHOWS A TINY PART OF BRIANS BED AND HEARD MOANS AND HE IMMEDIATELY WENT ‘it’s Brian! okaaaay, look at them having sexy time again. I am so fucking glad that Justin’s hair is growing back. (That surgery flashback happens) What just happened? Why did we go from soft to rough? Is he having surgery flashbacks? What’s going on? Did he lose his hard on? See, if the fucking Doctor didn’t get mad at me, i would’ve had ALL my questions answered but noooo, now I’m in the dark about my Bri Bri’s health. Oh i feel bad for Brian, this has to suck. But its okay Bri Bri. Things happen. If this was season 2, hed yell at Justin by now.’ And we are now at Emmett and Drew in the motel ‘what the fuck? How did we get here? DUDE…i think he’s not straight..(drew has his little internalized homophobia moment) um dude.. what the fuck? *deep manly voice* i throw ball far! I catch ball! I no gay, me straight! SPORTS *hits his chest* hetero bro!…dude, i think you need to look up the word straight. EMMETT YOU DESERVE BETTER CAUSE THIS IS BULLSHIT’ we are at Lindsay and Sam now ‘full offense but his art is not worth acting all *waves his hand at lindsay* whatever the hell that is. IS SHE JEALOUS THAT HE FLIRTED WITH A DIFFERENT WOMAN? Lindsay? What?’ And we are back at Brian ‘i missed this cute motherfucker *he is watching Brian at work like it’s the best thing ever* i need more of this. He is a beast at his work. No wonder he thinks he’s the shit. (Brian says that line about juggling balls and ted looks ready to tell jokes) THIS IS WHAT I WANTED! THIS! THEM! BEING BESTIES! *looks at me all worried* thats what the youth say nowadays right? Besties? I’m right, right? BRIAN LIKES TEDS SUIT! AND CONFIDENCE! Okay so brian and ted? New favorite duo! But also brian, ted and Cynthia? New favorite trio!’ Mikey and Justin are now on the screen and he is all excited ‘THIS IS ALSO NICE! Justin and Mike being best friends! FUCKING FINALLY! I knew Mike had some good in him. Finally he is done pissing me off. THEY HAVENT FUCKED SINCE THE SURGERY?! Theyre going to get HERBS?! FOR BRIAN? FOR SEX? not what i thought of when i said besties but okay?’ And now we are at Ben and his student scene ‘what the fuck is going on over here. Ben had potential in the beginning! What the fuck happened with him since then and what the fuck is this shit? OH THE GUY IS HITTING ON HIM! BEN WHAT THE FUCK’ and the Brian/Deb scene is about to happen ‘IS DEBBIE IGNORING BRIAN? Wait have they not even talked since vic died? DEB WHAT THE FUCK? Did you see how he looked after deb? He is SAD! Someone fix this because i cant handle him being sad (brian runs after deb) oh i guess Brian is gonna fix this. This is new. Deb he needs you. He needs a mom! Shit does jen know yet?! Look at him fixing his messes. MY BABY IS GROWING UP! (Brian tells deb) HOLY FUCKING SHIT. *he literally teared up at Deb being all mom to brian and when she like buttons up his jacket* I hate that the only time he has a mom is when horrible shit happens. He needs someone to look after him as much as he looks after them. Also why is this literally me if i was around Brian? WHY ARE WE ASKING ABOUT HIS MOTHER? FUCK HIS MOM. She doesnt deserve to know! (Deb hugs brian and he once again tears up) yes he will be okay! Finally someone is hugging him!’ ‘Wait Emmett is going to get Drew a job? He was all im hetero not gay and being a bitch about it and he’s helping him? Emmett, no. You deserve better’ mikey and justin scene is up!! ‘Look at the new besties! If you told season 1 Michael that he’d be HELPING Justin fuck Brian, he’d have a stroke. *he is absolutely dying out of laughter at the china store scene* what are they saying? Remember when that one time, i accidentally put Chinese subtitles and thought i spoke Chinese?’ ‘BRIAN! Dont you worry! Blondie is on his way with boner herbs!’

I should probably say that he did threaten with a lawsuit if the episode doesnt have Britin being cute/happy, he is literally one of us. HE IS ONE OF US. I seriously love the idea of bringing a lawsuit against CowLip for emotional pain and suffering.

I am so fucking glad that Justin’s hair is growing back. <- One of us!

If this was season 2, hed yell at Justin by now. GROWTH! (only to have it ripped away in S5)

OUR BABY IS GROWING UP

Joan doesn’t deserve to know.

And Emmett does deserve better. (Sorry Drew)

OH MY GOD even I remember when he put on Chinese subtitles and thought he spoke Chinese. I’m one of your family now. And yes, if you had told Justin and Mikey they would be collaborating to help Justin fuck Brian in s1 or s3… strokes would be had.

#ask winderlylandchime #dear sweet anon #queer as folk #a straight man watches qaf us 2000 in the year of our lord 2023

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haruhey · 2 years

Text

chronological thoughts of 11x14

- okay so i heard there were some good caryl scenes in this episode so please please PLEASE deliver because i had a bad day today

- omg we’re back to the carlson storyline yes pls

- they just let them turn holy shit

- his hair is so structured omg it’s kinda fire?

- MAGGIE AND AARON AND LYDIA YES YES YES

- oh and elijah but who rlly cares

- CARYL CARYL CARYL

- daryl said ‘hi! 🥰’ and carol really said ‘hey! 🥰🥰’

- carol looks so good in the red omg

- ITS A DATE HELLO?? HELLO???

- aw not him being clowned by rosita for his donut love

- no not that fucking asshole i hate him

- i hate even the look of him omg

- oh no daryl’s gonna get into some trouble and miss their date isnt he

- YES SLEUTHING GIVE ME THE SPY MOVIE SHIT I LOVE IT

- NEGANNNNNN

- wait am i lowkey a negan stan ??

- LYDIA ITS UR DAD

- HEY KIDDO???? HEY KIDDO??? IM LOSING MY SHIT

- that is such a shitty hiding place omg

- omg i love negan and annie’s friendship they’re so cute

- oh no i feel bad about this

- man fuck this prick i hate him

- you want CASH???

- YEAH BECAUSE YOU FUCKING DESERVED IT

- man fuck this guy so much FUCK THIS GUY

- DONT HURT THEIR KIDS

- YES DARYL YES DAD DARYL PROTECTIVE DARYL DAD DARYL IM LOSING MY SHIT GOD HES SO COOL

- I HATE THIS PRICK SO FUCKING MUCH

- assassination plot for this prick i don’t even know his name and i hate him

- did they send someone in there already omg

- THIS IS SO FUCKED UP

- OH MY GOD NEGAN AND ANNIE ARE MARRIED THEYRE NOT JUST FRIENDS OMG

- period lydia speak facts only

- NO THEY HAVE HERSHEL

- HES JUST A KID

- omg negan to the rescue

- omg annie’s pregnant

- oh my god why am i liking negan no no no no no i hate it here nooooo

- wait i kinda like annie’s perspective on negan

- negan please reflect on urself

- okay wait this episode is making me feel for negan

- i hope when he looks at hershel’s face he sees glenn and feels terrible

- OH MY GOD HERSHEL????

- NEGANNNNNNNN

- no no no no no no no no negan is genuinely sorry for what he did i hate this i hate him i hate him omg why do I FEEL BAD FOR HIM NOOO

- i feel like i’m going through an identity crisis rn omg

- DARYL DARYL DARYL DARYL DARYL DARYL

- i have sUCH A BAD FEELING ABOUT THIS

- BADASS DARYL

- daryl lowkey has bad form omg my decade of taekwondo and karate r cringing

- oh no oh no oh no

- JUST FUCKING CUT THE WIRE ROSITA HOLY SHIT

- get april to get the money omg daryl you guard the door

- oh god no not the gunshots

- MERCER AND CAROL SCREAMING CRYING SHAKING THROWING UP CUMMING PISSING SHITTING

- carol saving her bf <3

- gut up and go just fun date tingz for my middle aged parents <33

- someone hold bestie april’s hand omg she is literally going THROUGH it rn

- THEY ARE SO FUCKING COOL

- omg no i thought they were gonna show rosita bit omg

- daryl has 0 guts on him omg

- omg how convenient for maggie and annie to overhear

- oh no oh no oh no

- is carlson drinking

- oh god oh my god oh god

- I TOLD YOU IT WAS A SHIT HIDING PLACE

- decoy decoy decoy

- oh yeah its that specific effect where, as a character gets progressively more insane, their hair gets messier so we as the audience can understand where they are mentally as of this moment

- yes slay everyone

- YES THATS WHAT HE DESERVED

- YES EVERYONE ELSE EAT HIM EAT HIM EAT HIM

- periodt

- its kinda evil but like slay

- woah woah woah woah woah mercer okay slay ig

- why do daryl and i have the SAME HAIR this is so camp

- I CAN ALREADY FEEL THE STORYLINE COMING WHERE MERCER TURNS ON THE COMMONWEALTH

- why dont u just like… kill sebastian idk that prick needs to GO

- I FUCKING HATE HIM IM GONNA GO ON A RANT NOW BECAUSE I ATTEND A PREDOMINANTLY MALE PROGRAM AND I MEET GUYS LIKE THIS ALL THE FUCKING TIME AND THEY ACT AS IF THEY DESERVE THE BEST AND THAT THEY OWN EVERY SPACE THEY WALK INTO WHILE I LITERALLY QUESTION MY WORTH EVERY TIME I MAKE EVEN THE SMALLEST MISTAKE AS IF I HAVENT WORKED HARD TO GET TO WHERE I AM AND IM NOT ATTENDING THIS SCHOOL ON SCHOLARSHIPS I WORKED MY ASS OFF GETTING LIKE PEOPLE LIKE SEBASTIAN LITERALLY MAKE MY BLOOD FUCKING BOIL

- anyways wistem

- omg carol carol carol carol

- hornsby was in on it omg

- fucking loan sharks stfu

- literally miss me with this system bullshit this is why people wanted to fuck the government in the first place THIS IS HOW PEOPLE REVOLT YOU FUCKING I D I O T S

- yes carol yes girlboss gaslight him

- carol fr is not into this

- i love it when carol manipulates yes i love it when women do bad things

- omg negan and hershel wwe fight to the death colosseum gladiator style

- not another fucking group guys i cannot deal with this istg if another group gets introduced im gonna lose it

- unless its that one group that rick is in?? MAYBE??

- ooo flashback

- IS IT PEOPLE WHO GOT EXILED FROM COMMONWEALTH MAYBE??

- oh fuck off its leah

- oooo we finally got to the maggie daryl beef

- honestly if i was daryl and grew up the way daryl grew up (EVEN IF I DIDNT) and ultimately fell into being the gaurdian of my BEST FRIENDS’ kids, i would put a knife up to that fucker’s neck too if he threatened them like wtf that’s such a shitty thing to do

- i keep forgetting how shiny gabriel’s little head is

- im sorry i really dislike leah im not excited

#haruviews #twd season 11 #twd 11x14

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hello-yue-here · 2 years

Note

i would like to hear about your play

THANK YOU!

okay so i decided to write an adaptation of the myth of orion and artemis in which they are besties and artemis is aroace and orion is a gay man. BUT GUESS WHAT FUCKERS. IT TAKES PLACE IN THE WILD WEST. THATS RIGHT ARTEMIS IS A BOUNTY HUNTER BABY AND SO IS ORION.

to preface, the myth goes like this:

artemis is the greatest hunter ever. orion is the most sought after man in greece. shes a virgin goddess who has never and will never love anyone romantically and she is perfectly happy that way. orion is a gay man. they meet on a hunt and artemis is glad to have someone worthy to hunt with her because orion is great at it and she likes that he has never tried to make a move on her and they become rlly good friends. he doesnt know shes artemis. she reveals that shes the goddess and orion is MORTIFIED. artemis is like no idc were friends we can stay friends. anyways they hunt and at night they usually fall asleep around a fire anf one night apollo sees them and gets the wrong idea™️. backtrack: apollo and orion lowkey got a thaaang goin on. apollo gets healous, doesnt allow orion to explain, and lies to artemis about one of her priestesses being attacked. he says that the guy is trying to escape the island by swimming away and points out a tiny black speck on the water. artemis hits the speck and kills the man. TRUTH TIME. no one was attacked. apollo sent a scorpion to kill orion and orion swam out to see to escape it and apollo lied to artemis causing her to kill her best friend. she then makes him into a constellation on one sode of the sky and turns the scorpion into one of the other side, as far away in the sky from orion as possible. the end. thats it thats the myth its rlly sad but i think its got so much potential to be a good play so BAM i did it.

the main themes of the show are

-exclusionists have no place in the lgbtq+ community (apollo is a gay man who does not accept artemis being aroace and then he is eventually forced by artemis to leave town)

-romantic love is not the only form of love and is jot the only way for people to achieve happiness. aroace people shouldnt have to feel like theyre life isnt meaningful or complete if they dont have romance. honestly no one should have to feel like the end all be all in life is romance if thats not what brings them true happiness but i think society places too much importance on that. im gonna enphasize in this play that there are many ways to find true happiness!

-aroace people ARE capable of love (heyo familial and platonic love!)

-artemis and orion are the best best friends to ever best friend

when i was given this assignment i used it as a chance to learn more ab aromanticism and asexuality because ive been trying to figure out if i fit into those labels at all (still working on that but im def on the aroace spectrum i believe) and while i was doing research and atuff i found a lot of hate towards aroaces and a lot of it even came from within yhe lgbtq+ community so yk what? im gonna write my play ab how aroaces are a welcome part of thel lgbtq plus community. i also want everyone to he a cowboy.

so yep! thats the play! artemis also runs a safe house in the west for members of the lgbtq+ community anf while apollo does love his sister he does not accept the fact that shes aroace so hes the exculsionist in the lgbtq community and the people of the safehouse (based on artemis priestesses in greek mythology) represent the lgbtq+ community that is for EVERYONE. artemis and apollos relationships is supposed to represent familial love. artemis and orions friendship is platonic love. and apollo and orions relationship is romantic love (until things go south cuz if yk the myth well,,, you know that apollo fucks shit up for orion…)

anyways my professor said she loved it and said she hopes i continue writing this and i was like HOLY SHIT SOMEONE WHOS AN EXPERT IN THIS FIELD LIKED MY PLAY so yeah maybe i will continue to write this

obviously im still learning ab exlusionist and aromaticism and asexuality but were all learning !! and this i think this is gonna be a good way to help motivate me to learn even more :D

#also if any aro and/or ace people out there see this and have comments or concersn or critiques plz feel free to lmk #im somewhere on the ace and aro spectrums but im still tryna figure that all out #but this felt important to me and even tho it was just for a final i kinda wanna keep workin w it yk?#anyways lmk ur thoughts if u have any!

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astrochemstry · 3 years

Text

Sincerely three as best friends

Bcs i wished they became best friends and nothing bad in the musical happened :’)) also bcs DEH brain rot ghsahg im srry Connor seems so ooc here I don't know how to write him help

oK so they Evan and Connor met bcs of Jared since i said so jk but like

Lets just say Connor was a scout as a kid, his mom let him be a scout since she hoped it would- maybe, help control the anger issues and such

So ofc Jared is a scout too bcs its Jared

And they met and got grouped together

So uhh Jared and Connor didnt really like each other at first

I mean Jared was scared of him so he stayed away

Correction, tried to

But they always get grouped together

And bcs its Jared he can say some pretty hurtful things

“Oh come on those twigs arent even tied tight enough, did you even pay attention??”

“Thats big talk for a guy that’s just standing there”

I think Jared almost pissed himself bcs of how aggressive that sounded but lets not talk about that

For now

Anyways

Skip to whatever highschool or senior highschool i don't know how schools work im sorry

So Evan and Jared are walkin around the hall

Lets say theyre talkin abt whatever and then bAM

“Yeah this girl really likes me and- oh my fucking god”

Evan is confused bcs what ????

Then he looks at where hes looking and

coNNor mURPHy FOLKS CLAP YOUR HANDS

“Uhh i think i forgot to- uh forgot to go and get a hallway pass and uh and ill just go” Jared gets all nervous and now understands how Evan feels

“Holy shit Evan is this how you feel with Zoe? All sweaty and wet-” “just- just shut up. shut up.”

Theyre both cowards so they try to run away but then boom Connor Murphy is right in front of them

Jared almost pissing himself #2

“Evan Hansen, right?” “Oh- ah, me? Oh yes thats right thats me, Evan. Hansen Evan, Evan Hansen.” *insert Jared taking off his glasses, cleaning it and putting it back on- proceeds to squint his eyes at Evan*

“Nobody signed your cast.” “No shit Sherlock.” *Insert Evan nudging Jared and glaring at him and Jared thinking he fucked up*

But Connor doesnt give a fuck and only glares at him bcs hes more interested in the blondes- i mean cough bcs its Jared

Then swoOP he signs his cast, “There, now we can both pretend we have friends”

Jared coughing, “Ahem???” Evan raising an eyebrow, “I thought we’re just family friends?”

hey Evan got some sass too guys

Anyways bcs idk how they became friends bcs idk Jared tells Evan about how he met him at the scout camp and then for some reason Evan has this sudden burst of confidence where he decided to talk to Connor but fails miserably but Connor notices and then he talks to them and then what Evan says in For Forever turns true and-

Anyways

THEY BECOME BESTIES YAY

JARED PRANKS EVERYDAY

ok maybe not everyday but yk

Jared puts alarms for 3am and it starts again after every 5 minutes and the only way they can turn it off is to say “Jared Kleinman, the insanely cool Jared Kleinman”

Jared eating a bathbomb infront of Evan and Connor

Both very concerned about it but Connor says, “thats fake isnt it? Its not an actual bathbomb. right?”

But Jared tells them yes but thats the prank

It is a bathbomb

Evan constantly talking about trees and taking them to the park he became vice park ranger or whatever u call it idk

Jared: “You worked here??”

Evan: “yup”

Jared: “and thats the tree you fell from?”

LETS PRETEND HE ACTUALLY FELL BCS ITS AN ACCIDENT AND I COUGHGJHFGJH

Connor: “thats high.”

Jared: “not as high as you, bestie”

And he means Connor’s height… and bcs he was high at that time

Also Jared calls them bestie to annoy them but now its like a thing for them three

Theyre not really annoyed they jsut like how it sounds so they do it too

Connor does it sometimes tho, he always calls them by their Last name

Instead of first names being the factor of being close friends, Connor calling you by your last name is basically him saying “youre not so bad” or youre a close friend to him

Jared: “Evan, Bestie, is it photosynthesis if i combine a photo of me with the dirt in my backyard?”

Evan: “not really”

Connor: “Trying to grow taller, Kleinman?”

Connor is basically their go to person if they need a drive since Evan cant bcs of the cast but still cant afterwards since he hasn't gotten his drivers license yet and Jared almost drived into a shop and isn't allowed to drive for them

Hes also really good at finding places to make forts

And bcs of Jared’s and His scout knowledge they made one place in an orchard

Yk that orchard the Murphys love

Its closed but they sneak in lmao

Jared acts like he aint scared but bro is scared of getting caught

Connor also got them into books

Evan read the little prince and he cries over it everytime

Jared was like “ew books” but then Connor introduced ready player one to him

“Why do i have to read this? theres the movie??” “just shut up and read it bestie” and Jared loved it

Also they found out Jared is a secret theatre kid and got into it too

THEY LOVE HAMILTON

JARED CAN RAP GUNS AND SHIPS AND OFC, “and Peggy!”

Connor is pretty impressed and he complimented Jared on how its cool

Jared doesnt believe it and is still trying to find if hes lying

But really Connor isnt

Overall

I wish they became besties :’)

#help girl this is me trying to cope with life #dear Evan hansen headcanons #DEH headcanons #dear evan hansen hcs #deh headcanons #Jared Kleinman headcanons #Evan Hansen headcanons #Jared Kleinman hcs #Evan Hansen hcs #deh hcs #Connor Murphy headcanons #hcs #headcanons #fanfiction #Connor Murphy hcs

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ova-kakyoin · 2 years

Note

hello yes can i please get bonkle for the fandom ask game

Blorbo: Onewa holy shit you are the worst i fucking hate you i cant stand you you are my favorite character and genuinely the most homosexual character i have ever come across shout out to him collapsing mata nuis windpipe

Scrunkly: TAKUA!!! HE WANTS TO BE HELD!!! LOOK AT HIM!!! (takua from the sets only tho, takua from the movie is my sleep paralysis demon) (also bonus point to matoro he is a friend you will treat him as such he has suffered enough)

Scrimblo bimblo: nuju, he is such a guy his character arc is a circle and that is simultaneously hilarious and really fucking sad mans has intensely severe abandonment issues and is morosexual for the people who gave him his abandonment issues

Glup shitto: listen man there are like 2 unimportant characters in this series but my least important fav is dume holy shit straight up got replaced by makuta and no one fucking noticed cause hes just like that ig??? Clown behavior

Poor little meow meow: matau and onewa both have called vakama slurs multiple times but listen (also they share a voice actor and thats just the best theyre besties)

Horse plinko: mans has already suffered a shit ton but putting lewa in the meat grinder is always funny and interesting i refuse to stop

Super hell: mata nui <3 die again robot man youe movie was boring

#asks #g0reoz

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myidlethinkings · 4 years

Text

So my girlfriend has been trying to have me read the Wheel of Time series since when she was just my best friend. I picked back up the second book recently but it's been a while since I read the first and she went on this massive "YOU WON'T REMEMBER EVERYTHING FROM THE FIRST BOOK, LET ME TELL YOU"

This led to her Wheel of Time in 5 Minutes ™ lecture/rant and... I had to share this with the world. Enjoy.

Obviously every spoiler for the first book. You've been warned.

_______

k, eye of the world in 5 mins.

begins in the two rivers, emonds field, is gonna be bel tine and everyones all excited. rand lives further afield with his father and theyre bringing in brandy for the inn. rands all omg someones watching me as theyre getting in, tams all i cant see anything, rands all mustv imagined it. they get there. they hear theres going to be a gleeman. meets up with his bestie perrin and LOVER mat I WILL GO DOWN WITH THIS SHIP who are both like yeah we totes saw the figure too. they go we'll tell the mayor tomorrow.

they see the gleeman thom and theyre all omg a gleeman, omg. then the two strangers, moiraine, who is the best character ever to character in any universe fucking fight me on that and lan, who are asking questions about the area and people and moiraines like oh hi child to nynaeve the wisdom whose like im the fucking wisdom bitch who the fuck are you. she then says to the boys hey here have this coin which is totally a normal coin cuz i might have errands and shit and theyre like holy shit anything you want.

then he sees egwene and hes all like omg the love of my life will you dance with me tomorrow at bel tine and shes all yeah sure in the afternoon cuz i got shit to do in the morning and hes all like wut? and shes all GETTIN MAH HAIR BRAIDED YO and hes all like holy shit that means shes marriagable, holy shit man.

then the peddler paidan fain rocks up and gets everyone in a frenzy over war wherever and false dragons and logain or whoever else.

rand and tam go back to the farm overnight before the festivities begin. shit goes down. trollocs smash in, rands all OMG TROLLOCS ARENT REAL THO LIKE WUT and tams all, fly you fool and rand runs into the woods. but then hes all, i cant fucken leave my father so he creeps back and in the shadows he sees tam creeping around with a sword and rands like DAFUQ why does he have a sword, fighting ensues, tam gets hurt, is dying, rand manages to get him back to emonds field with a figure trailing them.

tams delirious, starts talking about rands dead mother and then starts talking about a battle and how they all poured over the dragonwall and that it was snowing but it was so hot, battle is always hot and she was a warrior even though she was pregnant and she gave birth and died and how he took the baby and rand was all WUTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT. im gonna ignore that shit.

gets to emonds field. everything is in ruins. trollocs wrecked the shit there too. nynaeve is all like sorry dude, your dads gonna die. hes all fuck that, gets back to the inn where the gleemans like hey that ladys an aes sedai, she could heal him but i totally wouldnt because you never know what they ask for in price and rands all i dont care because HE IS MY FATHER. MY FATHER. HEEEEE. ISSSS. MYYYY. FATHERRRRR. thoms all, holy shit dude calm down hes your father. moiraine, the best character in the universe, heals tam, then shes all like look, you three boys need to come with me and rands all, well shit she makes sense and they go but then egwenes hiding too and shes all bitch im adventuring too and rands all AHHHH and moiraines all huh the wheel weaves what the wheel wills, whatevs, and they go on, with thom whose also like this place is boring asf, im coming on.

they head out, dragkhar fly overhead, moiraine like a mofo destroys them, they get to tarren ferry, cross on the ferry, then coincidentally theres a whirlpool and the ferrys destroyed when theyre on the other side and egwenes like HOLY SHIT YOU DID THAT and moiraines all cuz im fucking awesome and nobody can follow us now so stfu and they head on.

rand interrupts a lesson with moiraine teaching egwene the true source cuz egwenes got it. rands all FUCKING WTF and thoms all dude, leave it, you cant do a thing about it. Shes gone now. Why don’t you bang mat instead. I mean the mat comment never happened but I will ship them till my dying breath. moiraines all to egwene youll die if i dont teach you, there was another back in emonds who also had it but she managed to survive/channel in her own way.

egwene starts to unbraid her hair. rand has a crying fit. egwenes all fuck off man, i do what i want. mydraal and shit attack them, they get to baerlon safely. where the gatekeepers like the children of the light are around but they cant cause much trouble cuz the city watch hate them and the whitecloaks are little bitches. they get to baerlon. mat and rand walk around. they see a few of the whitecloaks, dane bornhold a young man leading the small group. mats like lol, watch this, enters a shop, climbs up the top and hurls a rock at them, loosening barels. rand has started to feel feverish and when the barrels nearly knock them over, rand stands there and doesnt hide and rands like lol and danes like dafuq are you looking at and rands like im looking at you what are YOU looking at and hes feeling really odd and reckless and danes like are you a darkfriend and steps forward but then the city guards turn up who hates the whitecloaks and they face each other off and mat hauls rand off all are you fucking insane, you faced him off and rands recklessness leaves him and he freaks out and they flee.

throughout this time and through the book all three have dreams but i cant be bothered to get into those, theyre basically all the dark one figuring out who is who, and they wake up after rats backs were broken in the dream to be all oh hey it was just dreams though, to find rats dead all over the place and other stuff. Moiraine told them early on to go to her if they have dreams and the boys talk about it and theyre like we should probably tell her but nah, she saes sedai and like, its just dreams yo, yeah a few rats end up dead but cool, its fine, we’re fine.

oh baerlons also where he meets min who can see things around them, like with him a sword that is not a sword and three women on his funeral pyre weeping and with perrin she sees wolves and mat dice and with lan seven broken towers and a baby in a cradle with a sword and blah blah. And she says she can see he loves egwene and egwene loves him too but theyre not for each other, at least not in the way they want to be.

then he returns and nynaeve is there and she is PISSED and is all like we're going home now and moiraine manages to convince her they are in trouble and nynaeves like ..... i dont trust you, but fine. and lans all how did you find us and shes all i tracked you bitches and hes all like, huh.

rand says to her later about MY FATHER HE IS MY FATHERRRR and nynaeves all awkwardly like er yeah totally, i totally dont remember when your father returned after adventuring with an outlander wife, that totally explains your red hair, er yea sure. but that above all they loved him as much as they wouldv loved any baby.

oh a bunch of times during the book people startle at him and him being so tall with red hair and grey eyes and say he resembles an aiel. oh, theyre also ta'veren, so extra special they draw people into doing stuff with their lives, they effect the pattern. moiraine also says the two rivers used to be manetheran, a fabled kingdom. that night shit happens and they run off. they run, fight, attack, fight, as they battle mat starts yelling out things in an old language he doesnt know, that moiraine says was a manetheran war cry and the old blood still sings.

theyre going to get outrun in battle and against moiraines judgement lan takes them to an old crumbling city shadar logoth which fell to the darkness and even trollocs and mydraal dont like entering it.

oh also tam gave rand the sword which is a heron marked blade and lans all like er only blademasters have these why did your father have one and rands all HES MAHHH FATHERRRRRR and lans all yeah but how and rands all he bought it from a merchant years before and lans all yeah that sounds totally legit.

they go into shadar logoth, the boys sneak off, meet mordeth whose all like lol here take the treasure and mats like cool but rands like holy shit he doesnt have a shadow and then mordeth goes all rahhhh and the three manage to escape and they return and ramble about what happened and moiraines like DID HE GIVE YOU ANYTHING and theyre all like no and mats like er totally didnt and moiraines like we have to move and they leave but then this shadow thing that can kill them separates them and theyre all separated and perrin and egwene fall into a river together, and nynaeve finds moiraine and lan and is all like I will cut you aes sedai for what you’ve done to all of us and moiraine is all lol, and rand and mat with thom end up on a ship, the spray, with bayle domon and theyre worried he’ll throw them overboard cuz of the trollocs that chased them but domon seems to think theyre after him.

moiraines like with the coins i can track them, but two of them have lost their coins (paying for passage on domons ship). perrin and egwene roam around a lot, finally meet up with a man elyas who can communicate with wolves. aes sedai once tried to gentle him because of it but it has nothing to do with the one power so it didnt do anything. theres hints he used to be a warder, but now he hangs out in the wilderness. he says perrin has the same thing, perrin freaks out. elyas is like ill take you to the next city cuz you guys are lost. they then meet up with the tuatha'an, the tinkers, who roam around and dont harm anyone even if theyre to be harmed. perrin cant reconcile that, hes all how can you defeat evil by that, but in turn they pity him as hes such a young, sad, violent man with his axe. his eyes start turning gold like elyas' and he starts to communicate with wolves like hopper and a bunch of them though he tries to deny it.

egwene dances with aram, one of the tinkers and perrins all wow what about rand and they eventually leave, though aram is restless for a tinker.

the leader asks elyas if hes found the song which is their formalities, elyas is all no we havent. the leader then tells him of a story he heard, of an aiel who crossed the waste and died, to tell them that leafblighter means to blind the eye of the world. then she died. they leave and then they then meet afoul of the whitecloaks who are fighting whatever and bornhold - danes father – and byar catches them. through the ordeal perrin kills two of the whitecloaks while hes being all half wolf in the battle and they take them in to be questioned.

nynaeve and moiraine/lan end up finding them, releasing them, the wolves assist, nynaeve gets left behind, lans all about to get her, moiraine reminds him of his oaths, nynaeve turns back up.

meanwhile rand/mat are at whitebridge and mats starting to get sick and suspicious. he had a dagger from shadar logoth. a mydraal finds them, thom hurtles his flute and harp at them, says to go, to leave. hes saving them because he once had a nephew who could channel and the red ajah gentled him, while thom was having an affair with the queen morgase of andor when he was a court bard and by the time he got to owen it was too late and hed not survived, which he always regretted and then because he left morgase the way he did she was pissed at him too. rand and mat run for it, rand sobbing that thom is dead.

they go from village to village to village, mat getting sicker and sicker, a young woman who ends up being a darkfriend tries to kill them, they escape. rand keeps thinking he sees padan fain the peddlar from home, whose actually a darkfriend.

moiraine tells nynaeve she has the power too, nynaeve has a mini breakdown. moiraine said it would have begun with a doing something she desperately needed then a few days later collapsing really ill and the illness disappearing quickly. nynaeve once said egwene had gotten sick as a child and shed healed her not knowing how, then gotten sick. moiraine says thats also how she found them to begin with, in the city, she could sense egwene.

rand and mat go to a poor inn, they try to rob them by locking them in the back. mats getting sick and even more paranoid. rand is terrified when he realises theyre going to sell them to a darkfriend and he prowls and prowls till the room theyre in explodes, the wall crumbling. rand doesnt know how but he thinks he did it himself. mat becomes blinded from it and starts sobbing.

they escape. on the run again. as mat is blind, rand takes care of him and mat in his illness is worried that rand will abandon him which rand would never do because mat is the LOVE OF HIS LIFE, rand ends up really sick, paralleling what moiraine said what happened to nynaeve.

they end up hitching a ride to caemlyn where they expect moiraine to find them, if shes still alive. the buggy driver talks about the queen. how elayne is the daughter heir and her brother is the first prince of the sword. its been tradition forever that the daughter heirs go to tar valon to train and the princes go be taught by warders. he mentioned tigraine who was the queen before morgaise, who disappeared mysteriously nearly twenty years ago, who left behind a son galad. morgaise married the husband and became queen and while she had elayne and gawyn, galad lives with them too, now the husband is dead. oh, also logain the false dragon is being presented to the queen as prisoner before the aes sedai take him to tar valon to gentle him.

they get to caemlyn, mats REALLY sick. rand leaves him at an inn, tries to go see the false dragon being brought in. he meets loial an ogier whose nice, whose like 90 but really young for an ogier to have left his stedding without permission. rand ends up thinking he sees paidan, but doesnt have a good feeling, tries to run off, falls into a castle garden. meets elayne the daughter heir who might actually be the most annoying character to exist, her brother gawyn. theyre like omg you look like an aiel. elayne then talks about gareth bryne the guard captain dude she ships hard with her mother. galad MY MOST PURE CHARACTER WHO I LOVE FUCK ELAYNE (not a spoiler, his name is of the most pure camelot round table knight) rocks up, is all, holy you broke into the palace. elayne whose a bitch is like how DARE YOU YOURE NOT MY BROTHERRRR and galads all we are siblings and my duty is to protect you and shes all you wont do anything with this rand ill invoke protection, then galad goes and tells the guards because theres literally a false dragon being brought in and tension is on the rise in caemlyn and hes taken to see morgase.

the red ajah elaida is freaked out by him, knows hes taveren, has a bit of a prophecy but it doesnt really mean much and morgaise is all look, we cant just arrest everyone, let him go.

he then races back to the inn, moiraine and everyones there, they all hug, then hes all like oh yeah mats sick btw. moiraine goes up and mats not just sick hes now tainted. she does the best she can but is all like he needs to get to tar valon to have the bond between him and the dagger properly severed. then moiraine meets loial who randomly talks about an event concerning the eye of the world. perrins all oh yeah thats like the dead aiel girl the tinkers spoke about. that changes the plans once moiraine realises the dark ones trying to get to the eye and shes like we cant get to tar valon yet we gotta leave now. they use the ways which loail knows how to use cuz ogier and male aes sedai made them together centuries before but now the ways are tainted.

theyre like the worlds between the worlds, can get to places quicker but it has the black wind thatll kill you. blah blah blah they use the ways, nearly die, but get to fal dara/shienar, which is sort of where lan is from. nynaeve confesses her love, lans all no i cannot, i cannot offer anything. it ends up that his parents had the throne but his ... there was scheming. His uncles wife wrecked everything, she escaped with her baby into the blight, lans cousin, nobodys seen or heard of them, moiraine suspects isam might be alive but GASP keeps it from lan. the seven towers crumbled, lan has a death wish, he believes hes the only one left so must die.

lord agelmar wishes lan would rise up the banner of the golden crane because everything about the blight is crumbling, lans like no, i have a new oath now with moiraine. lord ingtar is a fight me soldier who fanboys after lan. theres a battle going on in tarwins gap they desperately need help for, but lan says he cant. lord agelmar orders ingtar to accompany them to the blight and leave them cuz moiraines like we cant have anyone else come with us.

Paidan fain by this point has rocked up to shienar and tried to wheedle his way into the good graces of lord agelmar but hes all wtf you look like a creeper and throws him in a cell. Moiraines like I need to question him at some point.

moiraine then takes them into the blight to find the green man who can take them to the eye of the world. the green man rocks up, hes made of vines and flowers, takes them to the eye. two forsaken rock up. moiraine tries to fight, is knocked out, nynaeve and lan get knocked out, the boys run. the green man is destroyed by the forsaken. rand ends up destroying the forsaken, goes into the eye, channels the male source in there, realises he can channel, has a fight with the dark one - whose still bound under the seals, but rand believes he ended the dark one and its done. comes out, the others are recovering. brings out an old banner from the eye thats the dragons banner, broken seals from the dark ones prison, and the horn of valere. moiraine is all, we need to take these to tar valon. rands all, you do that, but im done with aes sedai, im not going to tar valon. im done. the dark ones dead and im going to do my own thing. he turns to egwene who backs away from him when he said he channeled, then she bursts into tears and hugs him and says shes sorry.

they return to shienar, fal dara, where there was a miracle in tarwins gap where they believed they saw the creator and that the light took on flesh - they saw an apparition of a man they didnt know as rand fighting the battle he fought. ingtars flipping his shit because he missed the battle while accompanying them, and then not even being able to accompany them the entire way. After all of his talking about going after a week rand is still there, finishing his sword practice with Lan in Agelmar's private garden and meets up with Egwene. He tells her that he will go away. Egwene asks him to come to Tar Valon with her and Nynaeve, itll totes be fun, I mean theres the red ajah and shit wholl attack him if they know but hey itll be fun, but Rand refuses. He says he'll never channel again. When she asks him if he'll be going home, he tells her that he'll never go home.

Moiraine is underneath Agelmar's private garden. She uses her blue teardrop thing she wears on her forehead to focus her eavesdropping on Rand and Egwene. Using it to eavesdrop was the first use of the One Power she had learned as a young girl in the royal palaces of Cairhieren.

Smiling, she says, "The Prophecies will be fulfilled. The Dragon is Reborn."

the end.

#wheel of time #eye of the world #spoilers #i love her #she has a lot of feels with this series if that isn't obvious #I remembered everything with Lan and Nynaeve though because they're my favorites #rand #mat #perrin #moiraine #lan #nynaeve #thom #aes sedai #my gf is both a writer and history major and this is how she talks when it's just me

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