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#the chokehold this man has on me is astronomical
evanbuckleys · 2 years
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julio macias on his instagram stories | 07.19.2022
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valerinaswriting · 1 year
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350 notes on my joel fic already???? y’all are so HORNY 😭😭😭
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aflame4goinghome · 6 months
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god, jake has me in such a chokehold. that man could do literally anything and i’d eat that shit up, breakfast lunch and dinner. i’m down so astronomically bad
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monamipencil · 11 days
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Had so many thoughts after watching the gose comeback teaser...it looks like a parody of 'The Heirs' with Jihoon saying Lee Hyo-Sin's dialogue...
BUT while I had nasty thoughts about Jihoon in uniform with that sexy long brunette mane, Teacher Dokyeom stole my attention...
Oh and as Gyu said in his live, Shua is CRAZY man so that's just making me more excited to watch it.
P.S - Jeon Wonwoo. Long Hair. Glasses. Uniform. Beefy. Beef.
#Wanna run into him in the hallway and have him push me against the nearest locker
oh ikkk
man, jihoon with that long ass hair is gonna be the death of me. the thoughts that it puts in my head.. my god. pls shua asdfgh. and teacher dk.... hmm (no im not thinking what ur thinking that im thinking but i am thinking what ur thinking)
"#Wanna run into him in the hallway and have him push me against the nearest locker"
PLS, lmfao this is the most relatable thing. the amt of wonwoo wips i have is astronomical btw. this man has me on a chokehold.
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bbina · 17 days
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Y’all…the chokehold Park Wonbin has on me is embarrassing🫠 like have y’all SEEN how this man looks, the hair perfect smile perfect eyes BEAUTIFUL his whole entire being ASTRONOMICALLY PERFECT and don’t get me started on his personality bcs I will POP OFF.
In other words…Park Wonbin is the loml and is literally my husband 🫠😍 (he doesn’t need to know)
PARK WONBIN, ONE CHANCE IS ALL IM ASKING FOR🧎‍♀️
(thank you all for listening to my ted talk and y’all have a great day👍)
-🦕
i physically react to anything wonbin drops its actually a little embarrassing... i genuinely start tweaking irl when he drops a selfie or something i do not even fucking know anymore . hes just some guy i know.. whos basically the personification of the man of my dreams......
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heartshyuck · 2 years
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UH HUH AND IM STILL KNEELING BESTIE
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thereyoflights · 3 years
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it’s been three days and i cannot stop thinking about this man, the chokehold he has on me is astronomical. i genuinely cannot function.
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omgomgomg with these headcanons + your fics ler!peter3 has me in a CHOKEHOLD - imagine his reaction to finding out you like being tickled hhhhhh he’d be so smug and teasy and affectionate all at the same time like:
*pausing in the midst of wrecking you* “you know you can tell me to stop right? don’t get me wrong, i love messing with you, but you don’t gotta put up with it if it’s too much. the last thing i want is to make you uncomfortable.”
“um, y-yeah i know. it’s okay peter, i trust you. plus, it’s.. fun, doing this with you.”
“it’s fun?”
“yeah. i ... i like it.”
cue peter simultaneously melting at you getting shy and also feeling like he won the jackpot lottery with this info and grinning so so big
“really? you like this?”
“is.. is that weird? sorry, you don’t-“
“no! no no, it’s not weird at all. it’s just- oho, oh sweetheart. doho you have any idea what you’re getting yourself into? you’re telling me that not only are you the most adorable person i’ve ever seen in my entire life, but i more or less get a free pass to make you laugh your head off at any time? cutie, if you thought you had it bad before, just you wait, because i’m about to unleash a tickle monster unlike anything you’ve ever seen. are you ready for that, bugs?”
of course he would wait for you to nod or say yes before continuing tenfold (and a safe word would absolutely be established obv).
hope you don’t mind me leaving this here i just skdhskdhkadhjaakdhks, you know what i mean? hope your day is going well!
O.M.F.G. ANON. OMFG. ANONNNNNNNNNNN
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My stomach is FLUTTERING LIKE A FLOCK OF HUMMINGBIRDS- THIS IS ADORABLE. This headcanon has watered my crops and cleared my skin- AHHHHHHHHHH
I DON'T MIND ONE BIT ANON ♥️ THIS IS PERFECTION IN A POST. Please feel free to leave more headcanons in the ask box anytime you'd like 🥺 👉👈
The idea of Peter being like 😳 and then being like 😏 and then being like 😈 as a ler for reader absolutely slays meeeee.
And then once you're all tickled out he's like 🥺 and then 🤗 and then 😚❤️ ABSJSJDHSJJDJFHDJ
He's such a sweetie pie~ I love the idea that he'd stop to check in and remind you that you are always safe to set boundaries with him. I feel like it would be especially reassuring if his partner has ever struggled with being able to vocalize their boundaries (me for most of my life T-T) and it would help them feel safer and make it much easier to vocalize those boundaries. And on the flip side, you telling Peter out loud that you trust him would be astronomically reassuring to him. He's a worrier. This man is an adorable combination of the most evil ler in all the galaxies, and the absolute sweetest!
My day is going wonderful anon! Thank you for checking in! I hope your day is going well too!!!
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diorbabe66 · 2 years
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how is it that chris evans got a chokehold on so many people like explain me how ONE MAN has made so many people into the embodiment of tue no thoughts head empty meme (including me) because he's so fine like chris evans is in front of me IDC feminism leaving the chat 😭 this is heavily inspired by @carmensapientia literally just woke up and got attacked by what she sent i blame her. it's deadass astronomical tho
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amphtaminedreams · 3 years
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COVID-19, Negligent Manslaughter, and a Timeline of Tory Indifference
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“I feel sorry for Boris Johnson. He is doing the best he can in the situation and I don’t think anybody else could have done a better job.”
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[exhibit A: a gem somebody that I’m Facebook friends with reposted earlier]
It’s a sentiment that I cannot quite wrap my head around. I sit here hopeless and furious and trying to hold back tears because it’s been almost a year since England first went into lockdown and yet here we are, almost 100,000 dead, in an even worse position than we were before whilst other countries begin to slowly return to normality. It is clear to me who is to blame for this, however there are a large proportion of people who don’t want to “politicise” the actions of the PRIME MINISTER with regards to his approach towards handling a virus sweeping the country he GOVERNS. 
Typically, these kind of posts making the rounds on social media will be accompanied by some kind of photo of Boris Johnson looking somber as if to suggest that the way things have played out were beyond his control and that he is some kind of broken man beleaguered by the suffering he has, despite good intentions, inadvertently caused.
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This one in particular of Johnson with his head in his hands is a staple. In reality, this is a photo taken back in 2018 whilst he was receiving flack from party members for comparing Theresa May to a suicide bomber (for her handling of Brexit, ironically) as well as from the papers due to his rumoured (now also proven, in a completely non-surprising turn of events, to be true) affair with his former aide, Carrie Symonds. 
So let’s shut this narrative-where we should feel for Boris because he’s doing his best, and apparently a better job than anybody else could’ve done in his situation- down right here. In a supposedly developed country with one of the world’s largest economies, if we’re talking by proportion, our COVID-19 death toll is up there with the worst of them. It seems that every other state figurehead (bar a small handful), and I mean almost every single one of them, is doing a better job. People love to throw figures out there about how densely populated we are to combat damning statistics as if we haven’t got just as many factors playing to our advantage, as if it’s unfair to compare our response to Germany’s or Japan’s or Singapore’s (both of which are far more densely populated) or New Zealand’s or Vietnam’s, but we are an ISLAND with world-leading technology and infrastructure and healthcare equipment and professionals and a relatively high standard of living. In what world is almost 70,000 dead in a country with abundant time and means to prepare a response reflective of said country’s leaders doing a good job?
Apparently we’re supposed to believe that Johnson feels some sense of moral responsibility for this astronomical failure. A man who refuses to acknowledge the multiple children he has fathered outside of his marriages and who has had repeatedly engaged in affairs and one-night stands throughout said marriages. A man who continued to cheat whilst his most recent wife was receiving treatment for cervical cancer, for fuck’s sake. Yep, a real stand-up guy. 
So where does this idea that Johnson must feel remorseful for this catastrophe come from? We haven’t seen a second of remorse or a hint of accountability for the lives lost from him nor any members of his cabinet. That much is really no surprise; I have this hypothesis, and it’s not a stretch, that these people do not have an ounce of empathy in their bodies. These ridiculously privileged, privately-educated individuals who have had everything handed to them their entire lives simply cannot put themselves in the shoes of the average working person and that is the problem. Unable to recognise that what distinguishes them from most others is little more than the luck of being born into wealth and the abundance of recourses and connections that has entailed throughout their lives, they see us as beneath them-as less intelligent, less driven, and thus less deserving of the status and respect they enjoy. They see us as a bunch of whining, unmotivated idiots who do not recognise the chokehold they have over our media nor the fact that everything they do is a desperate grab to keep money and power within the hands of a select group of people, an exclusive members club from which most of us are barred (just take a simple Google search and watch Jacob Rees-Mogg’s opinion of the Grenfell victims or the buried Johnson speech where he talks about how inequality is essential). They know that we will squabble amongst ourselves about who is to blame rather than wising up to the truth which is that every decision they make is fuelled by cronyism and the inability to make and follow through with difficult choices, the pandemic being no exception. The supposedly self-made elite see the life of the average working class person as having far less value than their own, and their parties actions over the last 10 years have made that very clear. 
It was in December 2019 that the first case of COVID-19 was declared to the World Health Organisation and on March the 11th that they announced they considered it as a pandemic. In Wuhan, people were dying of pneumonia in their clusters. And what was Boris Johnson doing in this time? Well for starters, here in the UK we didn’t even have a pandemic committee-Johnson had scrapped it six months before. If years of benefits cuts and defunding of the NHS in favour of funding nuclear weapon programs, keeping British troops on other people’s lands, and tax breaks for the mega corporations that donate to their party didn’t convince you that the Conservatives have little regard for human life, them getting rid of this committee-whilst a pandemic has been declared year after year as the greatest threat to mankind-should have been the first sign of trouble. As if that wasn’t enough, he also skipped five of the COBRA (meetings are made up of a cross-departmental committee put together to respond to national emergencies and PMs routinely attend those pertaining to crises on the scale of COVID-19) meetings addressing the situation. Whilst other countries were closing their borders and stocking up on PPE, Johnson and his ministers were selling PPE abroad and simply telling people to wash their hands to the length of the tune of happy birthday. Their only policy was one of “herd immunity”, which was in fact not a policy but just an abandonment of their party’s public duty disguised as one, intentionally obfuscated with pseudoscientific jargon.
Even thinking the absolute worst of politicians you would hope that when it came to the point where the UK’s non-response to COVID-19 was becoming an international disgrace, Johnson and his ministers would take proper protective measures if only to save face. But when they eventually seemed to do so, it became clear that the priority was not the safety of the ordinary people affected by the virus. Outsourcing their test and traces system to companies such as Serco, Sitel, Deloitte and G4S rather than public health services, Conservative ministers could not resist attempting to line the pockets of their friends and benefactors in the process. According to the Guardian, instead of reaching out to the experts or using publicly funded services to handle COVID containment measures, the Conservative party has awarded a disgusting £1.5 BILLION WORTH of contracts to businesses with explicit connections to its MPs and donors, the majority of which lack any relative experience of the tasks they’ve been trusted to carry out. Unsurprisingly, the National Audit office found that when awarding contracts relating to the production of COVID-19 protection measures and treatment needs, there was a “high-priority lane” for suppliers referred by senior politicians and officials; companies with a political referral were 10 times more likely to end up winning a government contract than those without. On top of this, it is not hard to draw a link between the late initiation of lockdown measures and preemptive openings of pubs and restaurants against scientific advice to the interests of frequent donors such as Wetherspoons owner Tim Martin. Even if one chooses to ignore the blatantly obvious correlation between the owners of the businesses whose profits were prioritised over safety concerns and the number of those owners who donate to the Conservatives, party officials at the very least were reluctant to follow the lead of many other countries in financing furlough schemes themselves and instead avoided this responsibility by using loose lockdown measures to leave it down to the discretion of small business owners, who couldn’t themselves afford to furlough staff, whether or not to stay open. 
Time and time again, as the government flounder and fuck about, favouring personal desires to keep their powerful, high-paying jobs and to satisfy the corporate allies who make this possible, blame has been shifted from the public to care homes to NHS workers and back again whilst we, the public, make the biggest sacrifices of all under the illusion that we were being guided out of this pandemic rather than lied to and thrown under the bus. Whilst the elite continue to pick and choose what rules apply to them, it’s students and the elderly and the vulnerable paying the fines and scrabbling to afford basic living costs and hoping that they don’t lose someone dear to them.
Don’t get me wrong, a large proportion of the public have contributed to the spread too with their selfishness and entitlement and the arrogance it takes to develop a sudden refusal to acknowledge basic science from experts who have studied in the field their whole lives so that they can justify their need to go to the pub (speaking of, it’s absolutely HILARIOUS how many “mental health advocates” are suddenly coming out of the woodworks on football avi Twitter after they’ve spent years calling people on mental health Twitter attention seekers). And don't get me wrong, there were inevitably going to be casualties of this pandemic. But it didn't have to spread to this many people, and there didn’t have to be so many deaths due to a lack of preparation, and this wouldn’t have been the case if it weren’t for the inherent apathy of the Conservative party towards the lives of people of lesser status than them, the reluctance to put those lives before party interests. I wish I felt like there was an end in sight, I wish there was some positive takeaway from all of this, but even now, we continue to see corners being cut with the vaccine lauded as our saving grace and anti-maskers gathering outside hospitals to chant about how “oppressive” it is to be urged to wear a bit of cloth over their faces for the short periods of time in which they leave their houses and all I can think of is the selfishness that runs like poison through our country. It makes me sick and leaves me to question desperately where we go from here. I don’t like unanswered questions, I don’t like feeling politically directionless, and I don’t like the growing fear I have about the state of the world which seems to intensify every single day. In the UK at least, it’s starting to feel like nothing will ever change-we’re told we live in a democracy and yet mainstream media is owned by the people whose interest is to keep their Conservative friends in power. The stronghold they have over print media in particular allows them to continually get away with smearing and defaming every person who comes along and seems to want to actually help ordinary people, without being challenged, to the point where the only kind of “opposition” we’re left with promises nothing but a big boss approved tactical reshuffling of the status quo (which they call “electability”); it doesn’t feel like democracy when the majority of the country are being fed misleading information and convinced against voting in their best interests. 
This is the result of that. The state we find ourselves in is the inevitable result of being manipulated into helping the elite build their protective wall whilst the rest of us scrabble to get in and step on each others heads along the way, the people inside shouting over that it’s those even more vulnerable than ourselves that are taking our places. Outside the wall, the earth is falling from beneath our feet, and instead of throwing over the ropes to help us out, the people inside are stockpiling them so they can secure their firm place above ground and then later flog the rest. How many more people have to die before we reach some kind of widespread realisation of that? Where do we go from here and what do we do? Well for one, we can stop spreading those god-fucking-awful textposts on Facebook and get our heads out of our arses. Wear our masks over and wear them over our fucking noses. Have some fucking consideration for others. Don’t wait til an issue affects you personally to give a fuck about it. AND START HOLDING THE FUCKING PRIME MINISTER AND HIS MINISTERS AND HIS ENTIRE PARTY AS WELL AS THE OPPOSITION MPS THAT HAVE SAT BY THE SIDELINES AND ALLOWED THIS TO GO ON WITHOUT PROTEST ACCOUNTABLE. That would be a good start. 
I’m so tired. Things didn’t need to be this way, and yet because of the selfishness of the few, thousands upon thousands are dead. It’s not about “throwing around blame”, it’s not about “throwing around” anything, it’s about expecting a leader to do his best to protect lives. If that is “throwing blame”, let’s get things clear, I have no issue with hurtling it torpedo style at those who handed out a death sentence to so many in this country rather than do anything that might compromise their own privilege. Honestly, pass me the shovel after and I’ll happily bury the wreckage in the ground. Who wants to join?:-)
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