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halobirthdays · 5 months

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Happy birthday to Sergeant Major Avery Johnson!

Today is his -451st birthday!

Johnson was born and raised by his maternal aunt in Chicago, who kept him in tidy hand-me-downs and dutifully brought him to church. He enlisted in the UNSC when he was nineteen, believing the Insurrection to be a threat to innocent people. He quickly stood out among his peers and was hand-selected for the newly-instituted ORION project, an attempt at creating a new form of biologically enhanced soldiers to quell the Insurrection.

Avery underwent the training and augmentations, well-exceeding his superiors' expectations. However, the program as a whole was not the success the UNSC was hoping for, and was deactivated, though ORION would be used as the blueprint of the SPARTAN project. Johnson was reassigned to the marines.

He was then deployed to Tribute, where he failed to prevent an Insurrectionist terrorist from blowing up a diner, leading to several dozen civilian deaths. These events left him shaken, and he returned home to Chicago, only to find that his aunt had died. He spiraled, falling into a drinking binge and only recovering when a recruiter stumbled upon him in a gutter. The recruiter convinced Johnson to reenlist, and he was deployed to Harvest.

While on Harvest, the UNSC made contact with Kig-Yar, the first ever interaction between humanity and the Covenant. However, peace quickly failed, and he was involved in the very firsr battles of the Human-Covenant war.

This early experience would prove invaluable, and he was deployed on several key missions following these events. During OPERATION: SILENT STORM, he met Blue Team for the first time, and they earned his respect, with Johnson backing up John as leadership became accustomed to the Spartans. He also helped protect them when he accurately deduced that the Spartans were being targeted by Hector Nyeto.

Johnson continued to serve all the way up to the fall of Reach and the discovery of Installation 04. When the Covenant attacked the Pillar of Autumn, Johnson, along with the rest of the crew, landed on the Halo. Johnson and Keyes investigated intel from a captured Sangheili about a weapons cache on the ring. They found the Flood instead. Johnson survived as the Flood infected his squad and ultimately survived Halo's destruction when he was later discovered by Master Chief.

Following these events, Johnson received a promotion and Colonial Cross for his bravery on Halo, but the award ceremony was cut short when the Covenant attacked Earth. After chasing the Covenant forces off of the planet, Johnson and the In Amber Clad's crew discovered a second Halo installation.

He joined Commander Miranda Keyes to the Halo in search of the activation index to prevent the Covenant from firing the array. However, they were ambushed by Arbiter Thel 'Vadam and taken hostage by Tartarus and his Jiralhanae.

Keyes was brought to the control room to activate the ring while Johnson was about to be executed until they were interrupted by an attack from the Arbiter and the newly-formed Covenant separatists. Johnson then convinced Thel to join forces to stop Tartarus from activating the ring, coordinating the first cease-fire between their species.

After learning the purpose of the Ark and the location of the portal on Earth that would take them there, Johnson, Keyes, and Thel raced back to warn Earth of the coming Covenant invasion. Johnson followed Truth after helping to coordinate a joint UNSC-Sangheili mission to the Ark.

Johnson and his squad were overwhelmed by the Covenant forces at the Citadel. His squad was killed, and he was taken hostage again because the Halos can only be activated by a human. Truth attempted to use Johnson to activate the Halo array, but was stopped by Keyes, who planned on killing Johnson and herself so there would not be humans for Truth to use. However, she hesitated, and Truth used the opportunity to kill her. His victory was short-lived, with Master Chief and the Arbiter arriving shortly thereafter, killing Truth and preventing the rings from firing.

With the pressing danger gone, the UNSC and Sangheili forces focused on Flood containment. Following Cortana's plan, they decided to destroy the partially-built replacement for Installation 04. While Guilty Spark initially agreed with this action, he did not realize that the UNSC intended on destroying his replacement installation--he thought they were going to activate the ring when it was complete. When Johnson corrected him, Spark turned on them, killing Johnson with a sentinel beam.

The loss of Johnson was mourned widely, especially for John but also by Cortana and Thel, who both expressed their condolences. At Johnson's request, John "kicked [Spark's] ass" and activated the ring.

#the GOAT!!!#its thanksgiving here in the US of A #so everyone say Thank you Johnson!!!!

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multitrackdrifting · 1 year

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its ok if you don't understand the vision

i do

#GUEL NATION #GOAT JETURK #THE GOAT!!!#g witch spoilers #guel jeturk

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liverpool-enjoyer · 1 year

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ALIIIIIIIISSON BY GOSH THAT WAS BEAUTIFUL

#n THATS WHY HES THE GOAT #THE GOAT!!!#alisson becker #liverpool fc #lfc #liverpool #lfc liveblogging #liverpool vs fulham

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hasgavlebockenburneddownyet · 4 months

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time lapse of all the birds yesterday

#gävlebocken #the gävle goat #gävle goat #video

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helilart · 4 months

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can't say that 2023 was my favorite

#helilart #the mountain goats

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robotslenderman · 4 months

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BEHOLD, FOR NATURE RECLAIMS THE SACRIFICE THAT THE ESTABLISHMENT REFUSES TO ALLOW US TO MAKE. IF WE CANNOT BURN IN SACRIFICE TO THE GODS, THE GODS WILL TAKE WHAT IS THEIRS BY FORCE

#gavlebocken #gavle goat #shitpost #1k #2k #5K #10K #20k #25k

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goatmilksoda · 7 months

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A question I get asked a lot while working at a public library is "how do you deal with homeless people?"

And the answer is, we don't.

The unhoused people who come here seeking refuge 99% of the time understand that they will be kicked out if they misbehave.

The people you have to watch out for are Jessica, who only came because the kid she didn't want had to visit for a homework assignment and she just *needs* to yell at her child for asking to borrow two books or stay an extra five minutes, or Michael, who came in to look at porn on our computers for whatever fucking reason, or Karen who just wanted to come by to throw a fit that the particular book she wanted was checked out and harrass our staff about our collection being too limited.

99% of the time, the people we need to ban are middle to upper-middle class white people while the homeless and mentally ill/disabled people mind their own damn business and are honestly some of the best patrons we have.

#goat talk

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eiraisnthere · 5 months

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Happy to report that “a new threat has emerged”. The latest development in the goat saga is that the goat is being eaten alive by birds. This has, according to experts on the news, never happened before.

#gävle goat #gävlebocken

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ski-ip · 3 months

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elf ears

#dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #farlyn #marcille #laios #laios touden #falin touden #marcille donato #farcille #ryoko kui mentioned in one of the extras(?) that elf ears are soft and thin like a goat's and it's just so cuteee #they're so biteable #farlyn impulsive thoughts #comic #the touden siblings are freaks like that (affectionate)

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professionalchaoticdumbass · 5 months

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(2012 minecraft parody voice) I am mining... there are no blocks of sand.... you are digging down with me.... hand in unbreakable hand... and I hope we mine.... I hope we both mine.......

#the song is No Children by the mountain goats if you're wondering #added cuz i've seen quite a few people who dont know the original #(also this isn't about mc youtubers or anything this is just me having fun at like 1am)

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dissonantharmony · 4 months

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THE WIKIPEDIA GODS HAVE DECIDED

GÄVLEBOCKEN IS DEAD!! 🦀🦀

#gävlebocken #gävle goat #gavle goat #gavlebocken #1k #2k #3k #5k #10k #20k

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saritawolff · 4 months

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Phew. This one took, uh… a bit longer than expected due to other projects both irl and art-wise, but it’s finally here. The long-awaited domestic animal infographic! Unfortunately, I didn’t have enough space to cover every single domestic animal (I’m so sorry, reindeer and koi, my beloveds) but I tried to include as many of the “major ones” as possible.

I made this chart in response to a lot of the misunderstandings I hear concerning domestic animals, so I hope it’s helpful!

Further information I didn’t have any room to add or expand on:

🐈 “Breed” and “species” are not synonyms! Breeds are specific to domesticated animals. A Bengal Tiger is a species of tiger. A Siamese is a breed of domestic cat.

🐀 Different colors are also not what makes a breed. A breed is determined by having genetics that are unique to that breed. So a “bluenose pitbull” is not a different breed from a “rednose pitbull”, but an American Pitbull Terrier is a different breed from an American Bully! Animals that have been domesticated for longer tend to have more seperate breeds as these differing genetics have had time to develop.

🐕 It takes hundreds of generations for an animal to become domesticated. While the “domesticated fox experiment” had interesting results, there were not enough generations involved for the foxes to become truly domesticated and their differences from wild foxes were more due to epigenetics (heritable traits that do not change the DNA sequence but rather activate or deactivate parts of it; owed to the specific circumstances of its parents’ behavior and environment.)

🐎 Wild animals that are raised in human care are not domesticated, but they can be considered “tamed.” This means that they still have all their wild instincts, but are less inclined to attack or be frightened of humans. A wild animal that lives in the wild but near human settlements and is less afraid of humans is considered “habituated.” Tamed and habituated animals are not any less dangerous than wild animals, and should still be treated with the same respect. Foxes, otters, raccoons, servals, caracals, bush babies, opossums, owls, monkeys, alligators, and other wild animals can be tamed or habituated, but they have not undergone hundreds of generations of domestication, so they are not domesticated animals.

🐄 Also, as seen above, these animals have all been domesticated for a reason, be it food, transport, pest control, or otherwise, at a time when less practical options existed. There is no benefit to domesticating other species in the modern day, so if you’ve got a hankering for keeping a wild animal as a pet, instead try to find the domestic equivalent of that wild animal! There are several dog breeds that look and behave like wolves or foxes, pigeons and chickens can make great pet birds and have hundreds of colorful fancy breeds, rats can be just as intelligent and social as a small monkey (and less expensive and dangerous to boot,) and ferrets are pretty darn close to minks and otters! There’s no need to keep a wolf in a house when our ancestors have already spent 20,000+ years to make them house-compatible.

🐖 This was stated in the infographic, but I feel like I must again reiterate that domestic animals do not belong in the wild, and often become invasive when feral. Their genetics have been specifically altered in such a way that they depend on humans for optimal health. We are their habitat. This is why you only really see feral pigeons in cities, and feral cats around settlements. They are specifically adapted to live with humans, so they stay even when unwanted. However, this does not mean they should live in a way that doesn’t put their health and comfort as a top priority! If we are their world, it is our duty to make it as good as possible. Please research any pet you get before bringing them home!

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helixsnake · 11 months

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I remember someone saying "mad scientists in fiction aren't scientists because there's never a control group"

I think if you've created an elixir that turns people into goat men you have sort have gone past the need for a control group. The control group is not going to placebo themselves into goat men. You can probably not run the control group, and safely assume that none of them would have turned into goat men. That said, having a control group for that would make the mad scientist seem extra crazy and be really really funny, especially if he was carefully testing them for goat like features from the dyed water they drank instead of the elixir

#mad science #mad scientist #mad scientists #goat people #this post is blowing up so while you're here please play Spark the Electric Jester 3 it's really good

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hasgavlebockenburneddownyet · 5 months

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Holy shit there are so many birds