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aficwhore · 3 years

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Truth Is

Chapter 1: A Night Many Months Ago

Frankie "Catfish" Morales x F!reader

Summary: When reuniting for the mission in Colombia, Frankie and the reader (nicknamed "Chipmunk"), bicker due to their rocky past. After some angry exchanges, a few truths come out, changing both of their perspectives. Will the relationship be mended? Or once this is over, will they go back to the way things were before?

Word Count: 3K

Warnings: explicit language, blood, violence, guns/weapons, lots of angst and emotions, infidelity, talk of sex and sexual encounters, drinking, mentions of drugs, talk of death, and talk of mental health(PTSD, depression).

A/N: This was inspired by the song "Truth Is" by Sabrina Claudio. I want to make this a series (my first series ever), but it's still being decided, so please let me know if you want this to be continued! And I am still taking requests and prompts! Thanks Lovelies <3

"Cmon, please Chip, we can't do this without you." Santiago begged, his hands clasped together in front of him to show his desperation as he stood before me in my small apartment kitchen. I sighed, glancing around our surroundings. He had come to ask about joining one last escapade, one last job and we'd all be set for the rest of our lives.

Finally breaking the silence and meeting his weary gaze, "Who all have you rounded up? If Will or Benny said no, there's no way I'm doing it without them." I took another deep breath, turning to continue the dishes I had been doing when Pope showed up.

Santi's face began to light up, his stance growing slightly as he grinned, "Great! They both wanted in, so did Tom." Seeming relieved he leaned against the counter next to the sink and crossed his arms.

"And F-Fish?" I hesitated, pausing the scrubbing on the porcelain dish in my hand. It felt like the air in my lungs no longer existed. My heart began to pound it's way up my throat and into my ears.

His head dipped down, feeling the concern laced in my voice. Clearing his voice, he quietly explained "Haven't asked him yet, he was last on my list."

I silently placed the last dish onto the rack near the sink and wiped my wet hands on my jeans, looking down and watching the wet marks gradually making themselves known. No longer forcing myself to make eye contact, I nodded at the ground.

"Look, querida, if you two just talked I'm sure it would work out." He pushed himself off the counter and stepped towards me, reaching a hand out and gently rubbing my shoulder to console me. "But don't let this change your mind, we really do need you."

"When are you going to mention it to him?" I breathed out, wanting to keep any and all emotions at bay. His hand on my arm squeezed, as if he was trying to give me some courage.

"Tonight, at Benny's fight, I thought his spirits would be up enough to persuade him." He chuckled lightly, knowing his plan was to take a little bit of advantage of Frankie's mood.

I laughed softly, "Definitely sounds like a Santi move if you ask me."

He smirked and shook his head "I know, shame on me." As he dropped his hand back to his side he quirked, "You should come tonight, we can go out for drinks after the fight, relax a little before we leave tomorrow."

It took me a second to register what he said, but when I did I burst out "wait what?! Tomorrow? Santi, why didn't you tell me that? You forgot the biggest detail!"

He cowered down slightly, rubbing the back of his neck "Because I knew you'd yell at me, it was worth a shot putting off the anger a little longer." He smiled coyly.

Rolling my eyes I couldn't help but forgive his dumb smile. "Well it starts soon, why don't I get my things real quick and we can head to the arena together?"

His smile widened, "Of course!" I grabbed my purse and keys, making sure to turn off the lights and lock the door behind me. As we made our way down the elevator and out to his car, Santi told me a few details about the missions and the plan. But once we got into his rinky dink ford truck, I turned to him.

"About Frankie, I'm sure one of the boys told you, but just in case; his license was revoked." Santi's face contorted with confusion.

"What? How? Did he crash or hurt somebody?" He questioned quickly.

After taking a breath of courage I spoke, "No Pope. He-He was caught with coke."

Santi stayed quiet, turning the engine on. "I don't get it" A sad expression plastered on his face.

With a furrow in my brow I spoke again, "What don't you get? He was doing drugs, hardcore ones at that". I began to ramble more, "For what reason, I'm not sure, maybe the PTSD and depression. Maybe he felt he had no one to go to-"

"Stop. I know." He cut me off while finally shifting the gear into drive and moving up forward. "You can't blame anyone for this. All we can do is move on and help him. He's our friend, okay? But I know he's still the same Fish, just a little turned around."

"I know, okay. I can't help it. From what the boys told me, he seems to be a lot better." I added, stirring in my seat. "Anyways, it's been awhile since all of us have been back together. It's exciting."

Santi snickered, "But didn't you all hang out while I've been out of the U.S.?"

Seeing that we're close to the arena's parking garage I explained, "I mean, yea, but only me, Ironhead, Benny and Fish. I haven't talked to Redfly in months, we all had a fallout with him. Especially me."

"Tom didn't say anything when I talked to him, Do you wanna fill me in?" He asked with a quirked eyebrow.

Huffing, I turn to face him, telling him the events of that night.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~flashback~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The four of us, the Millers, Frankie and I sat on my couch, watching TV and talking, when we hear a bang at the door. I got up to open it and find Tom slumped on the doorway. He looked rough and smelled like he had been drinking the past several days. "Woah, Tom, you're really drunk, and you drove here?"

He snapped, beginning to yell, "Who are you to judge me? Huh? My wife left me, this is how I cope." He angrily pushed his way past me and tumbled into the living room. He was greeted with the boys standing around him with concerned faces.

"What the hell were you thinking? You know how dangerous that is? You know you could've called and we would've been there for you!" I raised my voice back, causing Tom to swing around to face me.

He laughed darkly, "Oh shut up 'Miss Perfect,' just like you did for Fish? When he was nose deep in coke? Or are you too self obsessed? Or do you just have favorites!"

"Hey man, that's not cool." Will interrupted and tried to get a handle on Tom. Frankie lowered his head in embarrassment. Will reached forward and placed a hand on his back, but things escalated more.

"Oh okay, yea protect the whore, we all know she's there for you guys more than just talking. I wouldn't doubt it if you all fucked her too. But me? Nah, you leave me out of everything." Tom howled, yanking away from Will and slurring his words and no longer making sense.

Anger becoming more prominent, I spoke, "Seriously?! Whore?! How is it my fault that you push us away and don't let us help? We include you in everything, but you have your head so far stuck up your ass you never show up!" I've come face to face with him, my hot breath and voice blowing into his face above me. "And another thing, I'm not a whore, you asshole, I'm with Frankie!"

He leaned closer to me, his breath reeking of alcohol, "Just him? Does he know where you're at everyday Monday and Wednesday at 1?! I doubt it!"

Frankie speaks up, "What? What is he talking about?" A devilish smirk makes its way to Tom's face.

"Nothing, I swear it's nothing." I try to explain, making eye contact with my partially hurt lover.

"Tell him, tell him you've been seeing a 'Dr. Philips.' Go on, do it." He rubs it in.

Looking behind Tom, I saw Frankie looking like his world had just shattered. "You've been seeing someone?!"

Panicking, I speak, "Yes, but it's not what you think, I promise!"

"Then what is it?" Tom adds, stumbling back a foot and crossing his arms contently at the damage he just caused.

Benny spoke up, knowing the truth about who I was "seeing." "You need to leave man, you have no right to say shit like that. You don't know the real situation"

Tom burst, yelling "I want her to admit it! I want her to admit that she isn't the perfect bitch she makes herself out to be!"

"Fuck you! Get the hell out of my house!" I scream, tears slightly welling in my eyes. "Frankie-" I turn to him, but to find him grabbing his things. "Baby please, let me explain."

"Explain what? You've been cheating on me?" his voice is loud, and cracks slightly.

A tear breaks its way down my cheek, "I haven't, Frankie, please believe me." I grab his hand, trying to stall his movements, but he pulls away.

"You just admitted it!" He frowns and yanks his hand away and heads for the door.

"That's right Fishie boy! Leave her, she's no good anyway!" Tom squawks as Benny grabs a hold of him and shoves him to the door, Will right behind to help.

"You bastard!" I lunged forward and swung my hand, landing right on the side of his face with a loud crack. Frankie spun around, startled at my actions.

The action only fueled Tom's anger because he ripped away from Benny's grip and grabbed me. I didn't back down and started to shove him and swing my arms, hitting him in the face and chest as he fought back.

But just as quickly as the fight started, it ended. Frankie tore me off of Tom, pinning me to his chest and stopping my brutal hits. Will and Benny wrested Tom into submission and dragged him out of the front door as he yelled slurs at me, and dumped him outside with a battered face.

While the brothers were dealing with a drunk Redfly, Frankie scolded and verbally fought with me.

"Just tell me! Who is Dr. Philips!" He questioned, slightly shaking me by the shoulders.

With many emotions running through my head, I couldn't process what was going on. "I-I can't, Frankie, I can't even admit it to myself." Tears streaming down my face I brought my hands up to the sides of his face. "But you have to believe me, por favor (please)."

Francisco looked like he was fighting an emotional battle in his mind. He finally spoke, "Either you tell me, or I leave, I can't do this, not if you keep things from me."

Feeling my heart break, I whispered "Please, mi amor (my love), don't make me. I'm not strong enough." My eyes now running like an open faucet and my hands tightly pressed to his cheeks.

He blinks away tears, reaching his hands up to grab mine and pull them away from his face, "Then I have to go." He drops my hands and turns to leave.

"Por favor no me dejes! (Please don't leave me)" I call after him, watching as he heads out of the door and into the night, leaving me alone. I drop to the floor, tears blurring my vision and all that can be heard are my sobs.

After what feels like hours, Will and Benny return, picking me up off the floor and taking me to my bed. They lay me down, attempting to help my emotional breakdown. They pick up whatever mess that was left after the event of that night.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~end flashback~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"And after that night, Tom was no longer invited anywhere with us. Frankie distanced himself and refused to talk to me. But Will and Benny did their best to be there for me in any way they could. They did the same for Frankie. But as for Tom, they casted him out, because he changed, badly." I finished covering the story of that night, fighting the tears that threatened to spill. "And the Dr. Philips I was seeing, was my therapist. I didn't want anyone to know I wasn't okay mentally. I was embarrassed and part of me didn't want to admit I needed help. The lives we chose aren't easy."

Santi parked, and seemed shocked, "I'm sorry love, I knew you split with Fish, but didn't know any details or about Tom." He reached over and patted my thigh sympathetically. "I really am sorry that you went through all of that because Tom was an asshole. You really don't have to do this-"

"No I want to, I'm in a better place, so is everyone else." I smiled shyly, wanting to lift the spirits. "So what do you say? Let's go wrangle up our boys and get rich?"

Pope smiled brightly, "Hell yes!" We both got out of the car, and headed to the back of the arena and knocked, hoping Will was there to open it like he told Santi he would. Much to our luck, the door swung open to reveal a tall, smiling, blonde Miller brother.

"Brother!" Santi chuckled as he pulled the eldest Miller into a hug, clapping each other on the back. They pulled away as Pope headed inside to find the others.

"Hey pretty girl, long time no see." Will joked, hugging me tightly.

I scoffed, "Will, you were just at my house last night." We both laughed and he led me into a rank smelling locker room, which I assumed was for Benny to get ready. As we rounded the corner, I saw Benny and Tom chatting on one of the benches between the lockers.

"Chipmunk!" Benny roared as he ran over, picked me up and spun me around. "I missed you! I'm so glad you could make it!" He sat me back down and stepped back to sit on the bench again.

"Of course, I wouldn't miss you getting your ass beat for the world!" I giggled as I winked at him, showing the younger of us a bit of love.

He shook his head with a grin. As my eyes left him, they met with the eyes of Tom. He seemed to have a look of regret, trying to give me a sad smile.

I walked over to him, reaching my hand in a fist forward, lightly tapping his shoulder, "Hey fly, how you been?"

A small wave of relief washed over him as he responded "I'm good Chip, how are you? And look I'm really sorry, I wasn't in a good place and I regret-"

"Its okay Tom, really, it is. I'm just glad you're better. It's water under the bridge." I sit next to him and pat his back, showing that all, or at least most, is forgiven.

He nods slowly, "Thank you, it means a lot that you're here."

"Oh cmon you have to admit it, you couldn't do it without me, the best there is." I pretend to act over confident and burst into laughter. And Tom joins in.

As Tom and I begin to catch up, talking about what we've missed these past several months, I overhear a conversation.

"Hermano (brother)! How are you?" Santi greets Frankie, I assume, he was the last of us, who wasn't already here. When I realize that it is him, my heart begins to race. My skin starts to burn and get hot, my palms becoming sweaty.

"Pope! Benny! Ironhead! What is this, a reunion?" Frankie's voice echoes as they come closer. As the three round the corner, "All we need is Redfly and Chip-" Frankie stops as we become revealed to him. Tom gets up immediately and struts over to give Fish a hug. Frankie's face lights up with glee and hugs him back. When they step away from each other, I wearily stand up and all he does is give an awkward smile and nods in my direction.

Benny attempts to whisper to Santi, "Ouch, that's cold." And Santi jabs him in the stomach with his elbow, causing him to double over and make a "hmf" sound.

Being slightly hurt, I break the uneasy tension by opening an invitation, "Alright well I'm gonna go get a beer and find us some good seats, it's close to showtime!" Faking a smile I continue, "Who's coming?"

"Me, I can't be in here with this doofus anymore." Will chuckle as he ruffles Ben's hair and follows right behind me.

When we make it to the concession stand and order beers, Will taps my arm, "How are you feeling?"

With a sigh, "Honestly I expected that, but it hurt more when it actually happened. But what can I say." I grab out drinks from the concession worker and thank her and turn on my heels to find a seat. "I love him, and if that means waiting to mend things, it worth it, even if it means waiting forever."

Will offers a sympathetic grin. "It'll work, just watch. Oh! Over there! Perfect seats!" He points as his attention was caught by an opening near the rink. He pursues it as I follow behind.

While we sit, we joke around, waiting for the rest of the gang to come sit and watch Benny get thrown around. Finally the last three show up and sit with us, Tom sat on Will's right side, me on his other side, Santi on my left, but when Frankie walks up, he bends down and whispers to Santi, causing him to scoot further away from me and leaving room for Frankie to slot himself between us. Which took me by surprise. Once he was seated, he glanced over to me and gave me a genuine smile.

We don't say a word as the lights begin to dim and the announcer's voice breaks through the speaks, introducing our dear Benny and his opponent.

Our small group starts to cheer and scream Benny's name, to show him support. As he enters the rink, he searches for us, and when he finds us, he smiles big.

In the midst of all the commotion, Frankie leans over and whispers to me, "I missed you, cariño (sweetheart)."

My face whips around to meet a very close Fish, who is smiling. "I missed you too." I give a small smile and lean to my side to shoulder bump him, as he places a hand on my knee.

#frankie morales x reader #frankie catfish morales #frankie morales x f!reader #pedro pascal x reader #triple frontier #triple frontier x reader #frankie morales #Pedro pascal #santiago garcia x reader #william miller x reader #benny miller x reader #tom davis x reader #angst #frankie morales angst

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calpalirwin · 4 years

Text

Confessions

Summary: Anon request- I may have sent this request to you last week so if I did just ignore me. 🤦🏻‍♀️ So I NEED a one shot/fic where Luke’s twin sister just got out of a bad relationship and comes on tour with the boys. Luke is really protective over her and he finds out she’s been dating/sleeping with Ashton behind his back. Idk why I’ve had this story in my mind forever but I’m a horrible writer. 😂 Thanks!!

A/N: Thanks for the request! Gave the reveal some fluff because the idea of the brothers hating the boyfriend dating their sister always rubbed me the wrong way.

Content: Abuse, protective dynamics

Word Count: 3.3k

And away and away we go!

“Is there anybody you’d like us to call?” the nurse asked her.

Leia Hemmings shook her head. She couldn’t tell her family about this. Not that they wouldn’t rally behind her, but because despite all the pain Wyatt Miller had caused her, she didn’t want to return the favor. Wyatt could break her ribs, but he could never break her spirit which was to love with all she had.

“Do you have a safe place to go?” was the follow up question.

Leia nodded. “Yeah. I’m good.”

The nurse pushed a few pamphlets for domestic abuse services and women’s shelters into her hand anyway. “I’m going to sign your discharge papers, but feel free to stay in here as long as you need, okay?”

Leia let out a sigh of relief as the nurse left her. She was grateful that for all her stupidity, she had kept her apartment, not giving into Wyatt’s demands for her to move in with him. It had earned her three broken ribs and the worst bruising of her life, but she was steadfast that in all her bad decisions with Wyatt, that wasn’t one of them. That being said, she knew she couldn’t stay at her apartment. So with shaking fingers, she dialed her brother.

“Hey!” Luke greeted happily, picking up on the first ring.

“Hey,” she answered.

“What happened?” he asked, detecting the slight wobble in her voice.

“Wyatt and I broke up,” she whispered, offering up the simplest part of the truth.

“Oh, Leia” was the heartbroken response.

“It’s fine, Luke. I’m fine. It just… uh… gonna need to get a new place.”

“Shit,” he cursed. “What happened?” The question was repeated with a much sterner tone than the first time.

“It didn’t end well. It’s fine. Hey, I gotta go. But we’ll talk later to make plans for when you’re back out here, yeah?”

“Yeah, of course. Hang in there.”

“Who was that?” Ashton asked as Luke ended the call.

“Leia. Wyatt and her broke up.”

“Fuck. Is she okay?” He had always liked Leia, more so than the other siblings of his bandmates. It was something in the way she held herself in a manner that made her seem older but still clung to the childhood innocence that spoke to him right from the get go.

“I don’t think so.”

“How can I help?”

~~~

“I’m fine!” she huffed for the millionth time.

“No, you’re not. You’re coming with me. End of discussion.” Even through Facetime she could see the hard glint in his eyes. As the youngest boy, Luke had learned the mannerisms of getting his way. But Leia was the only girl, and the baby by five minutes. And she could be just as stubborn as he was, if not more.

“I’m fine at home with Mum and Dad.”

“Fine with sulking in bed you mean?”

“Oh, because sulking on a tour bus is so much better? C’mon, Lu-lu,” she pleaded, using a nickname only she had ever called him. “I’m just gonna bring everybody down. It’s better if I stay here.” At home with her parents, she could hide the bruises on her body better. At a week, the bruises only looked worse, making her more certain of her decision to hide it from her family. All they knew was that her and Wyatt had broken up and that she was looking for a new apartment to get a fresh start. And that was the way she wanted it.

“Le-le,” he used, using her nickname only he had ever called her in retaliation, his blue eyes pleading softly. “You’re not gonna bring anybody down. We want you with us.”

“Really?” she asked, trying to keep the hope out of her voice and remain skeptical. She didn’t get a lot of time with Luke these days, what with his band constantly traveling and him living on the other side of the globe. And she always got along with his bandmates, especially Ashton. But ten months of touring? It had been a long time since she had spent that large amount of time in such a confined space with her twin brother. Add three other fully grown men and a crew to the mix? Well, it would be a good way to ensure a certain you-know-who stayed far away from her mind.

He was still talking as her mind went through her thoughts. “So you’ll just meet us at the show and we’ll go from there. Le-le? Leia! Are you listening?”

Her long blonde curls shook with her head as she cleared her thoughts. “Sorry, what was that?”

Luke’s eyes rolled in feigned annoyance. “Our first leg starts in Sydney. So you don’t have to worry about traveling to us. You can just meet us at our first show and we’ll go from there.”

“Yeah, I just have to worry about my job… Not all of us can just pack up and leave, Lucas...”

“Hey!” was the hurt and offended retort. “You think that I don’t miss always being there for you like when we were kids? God, Leia, if I could be there all the time, don’t you think I would?”

“Alright, alright!” Leia huffed, feeling her eyes water at his sentiment. “It’s okay. We’re okay. I’m okay.”

“Well, I think the family can handle running Hemm Clothing without you for a while. And you can put those marketing skills to use by helping Andy and Ryan with merch?”

“Wow, way to sweeten the deal…” The eye roll was playful.

“So is that a yes? You’ll come?”

“See you in a few days, Lu-lu.”

~~~

“Fancy seeing you here,” a voice breathed and Leia’s body tensed.

“Get away from me,” came the barely audible reply through clenched teeth as her vision blurred with unwanted tears.

“Came to see big brother play?” was the sneer. “Think he’s gonna protect you from up there?” Wyatt’s head nodded towards the stage.

“I don’t need protection…” She threw as much malice and venom as she could muster behind the words but her shaky voice betrayed the fear that had seized her body.

The laugh was anything but humorous as it entered her ear.

“Go away. Please…”

“Aw, c’mon. Aren’t we having fun?”

“Hey, she said leave,” a voice barked and a tall figure strode toward the pair. Two shocks of pitch black hair framed the set of hazel eyes as Ashton’s large arms crossed in front of him as he tried to come across as menacing as possible. Leia felt herself relax at the sight of him alone. “Now leave, or I’ll gladly call security to throw you out,” Ashton used his slight height advantage to tower over Wyatt. “On second thought, I think I’ll just throw you out myself. Save security the trip.”

Wyatt, smart enough not to start a fight in public, muttered under his breath about how this wasn’t over and slunk off.

Ashton’s demeanor dropped the tough guy act and his hand was soft as it rested on Leia’s shoulder. His voice was equally soft as it asked, “Hey, you alright?”

Leia looked up at him and shook her head before letting out a blubbering wail.

Ashton’s eyes went wide before he was wrapping the younger woman in a tight hug. “Hey, it’s okay. Shh. He’s gone. I got ya.”

She froze, her body tensing immediately, and when her face involuntarily flinched, Ashton dropped his hold, a wave of disgusted horror washing over him. When Leia had called Luke up to tell him about her breakup with Wyatt, she had severely downplayed the damage he had inflicted if she was jumping away from a touch she knew she could trust. His heart shattered in his chest for her and he knew he had to keep this from Luke the same way she had. The look of pity in his eyes as she turned to look at him made her throat close up. “Please don’t tell, Luke,” was the pleaded request of a woman who was barely holding it together.

“Hey, look at me,” he implored and blurry blue met steady gold. “I’m going to get security to make sure he stays far away from you. He’s never getting near you again. I promise.”

“Ash, you can’t promise that. Eventually I have to come home. And he’ll be waiting. And the longer he was to wait, the angrier he’s going to get. And the angrier he gets…”

“I wouldn’t promise it if I didn’t think I could keep it. I’ll figure something out.”

“Promise me you won’t tell Luke.”

“I won’t,” he said, holding up his pinky. “But why didn’t you? Why didn’t you tell him the truth?”

“Because it makes me feel weak? Because I feel like I should’ve known better? That I should’ve fought harder? Take your pick…”

“None of this is your fault and you’re stronger than you think.”

She gave a sad shake of her head. “I shouldn’t be here. I should just go home. I’m just gonna bring everybody down. Tell Lu- Tell Luke I’m sorry. I can’t do this. I can’t be here.” The words fell from her mouth and she stumbled backwards away from Ashton, tears streaming down her face.

“Whoa, easy there,” Ashton said, keeping his voice calm and low. “We want you here.”

“You guys really want me here?” she asked skeptically.

Ashton nodded. “We really do. I do. C’mon, give this a chance. Please stay. Please?”

How could she say no to that dimple and those soft eyes?

~~~

“Let’s play a game of spot the goth,” Calum laughed at the camera before Ryan was moving the shoot upwards to Ashton and Leia, hiding in the shade.

The duo waved and shared a laugh. “You sure you don’t wanna go for a swim?” Ashton asked her. “Awfully hot out.” He was still in a pair black jeans with rips in the knees, but his shirt had been discarded long ago, while she stayed clad in her shirt and shorts.

She shook her head. Her sides still ached terribly when she laughed, but she could finally withstand a hug without having to excuse herself to cry out in pain after. The bruises, while no longer a horrendous shade of blues and purples, were a sickly faded yellow. No. She would much rather hide out with Ashton.

Ashton sighed. While she hadn’t actually confessed the truth of what Wyatt had done to her, Ashton was highly certain his speculations about what had happened were closer to the truth than what she had been telling Luke. “He hit you didn’t he? That’s why you’re hiding up here with me, isn’t it? To hide the bruises?” His voice held only concern, not even the slightest trace of judgement, which somehow made it worse. She didn’t deserve sympathy.

“He broke three of my ribs,” she confided anyway.

Ashton’s jaw tightened and he swore under his breath. “When?”

“The day I called Luke. So about two weeks ago.”

“Any other times?”

“No,” she shook her head. “That was the only time. I swear.”

As much as he wanted to, he wasn’t stupid enough to ask why. It didn’t matter. Wyatt shouldn’t have laid a hand on her, period. “Is that why you left your apartment?” he asked instead.

She nodded. “I’m scared of him, Ash. I don’t know what’s going to happen when this is over, and I have to come home. I can’t live with Mum and Dad forever. If I let him scare me from living my life then he wins. He already took so much from me. I can’t let him take what little I have left.”

“Come to LA with us,” he suggested.

She started to laugh but winced. “Ow! Don’t make me laugh!”

“I’m serious.”

“What would I do in LA? Live with you? Keep helping run merch for your band?”

“Well, you could get your own place if that would make you more comfortable.”

“Ow!” she chuckled, clinging to her sides. “It hurts to laugh! Stop!”

“I’m serious!” he repeated, not being able to help his own giggle. Even her pained chuckle was infectious.

She leaned her head into his shoulder, sighing in the daydream coursing through her head. Would living with Ashton really be all that horrible? She was as close to him as she was to her own twin; closer even now that they had this secret between them. It could be just like this, him making her laugh her worries away. “Mum will never forgive you for taking both of her babies to LA, you know that don’t you?”

“Hey, Luke took me to LA.”

She shook her head against him with a soft chuckle. “I’ll think about it, okay?”

“And I’ll help you pack when you realize I’m serious.”

~~~

She woke up in a cold sweat, eyes wild, hair even wilder. Her hand felt her heart racing underneath her fingertips as she kicked off the covers. The bruises had faded, her ribs had healed, but Wyatt still haunted her dreams nearly three months later. She rolled on her side to check the time on her phone: 2:17 am.

They hadn’t played a show as they were traveling to a new venue so everyone was catching up on much needed sleep.

She tried to tame her curls by pulling them into a messy ponytail before she shoved her curtain aside and crawled out of her bunk.

“Oh, hey,” a smooth but raspy voice called out to her as she pulled the fridge open to grab a water. “Couldn’t sleep either?”

She whirled around, spotting Ashton on the couch, plucking softly at a guitar. “Something like that…” she muttered, kicking the fridge closed and moving to sit beside him.

“Nightmare?” he asked, setting the guitar aside to wrap an arm around her shoulders.

“How’d you know?”

“I can hear you at night. Everyone here can sleep like the dead. Everyone but me. Always been a light sleeper.”

“Did I wake you up?” she asked, worried.

He shook his head. “Nah. I haven’t gone to sleep yet.”

“What were you playing?”

“Nothing really. Just messing around. Any requests?”

She brought a finger to her lips in thought. “Hmm… Safety Pin?”

He chuckled lightly as he reached for the guitar again and they both shifted around on the couch. He strummed quietly and sang even quieter through the song, her voice humming softly along. “You should try and get some sleep,” he told her as he set the guitar aside again. “Luke may think he’s hiding it, but he’s worried about you. We all are.”

She leaned her head back, staring up at the ceiling. “That’s not what I wanted. I never wanted anyone to worry about me.”

“Sweetheart, we’re always gonna worry about you. We love you.” And that was as close to revealing himself to her as he was going to get for now, but he placed his lips briefly to her forehead anyway.

“Ash,” she breathed, peering up at him. The tenderness was too much to bear. The ache for someone to show her that type of soft affection left her desperate and needy. “Please don’t do that…”

“Do what? Care for you?”

“Kiss me.”

“It was just a forehead kiss,” he defended, feeling guilty he had crossed the line.

“I know. And it’s going to make me want more.”

“And what if I want to give you more?” he pressed, her words assuring him of long buried feelings.

“Ash… I’m heartbroken over a boy who doesn’t deserve my tears. You’re my brother’s bandmate. We shouldn’t do this,” she said, drawing the line in the sand.

“Alright,” he relented. “But for the record, I’ve…” he paused to find the right words. “Have you ever looked at someone and just known deep down that there’s something there?”

She nodded.

“I feel that when I look at you. And I’m still going to feel that when I look at you tomorrow; the same way I’ve felt it every time I’ve looked at you.”

“Ash,” she started, but he cut her off by pressing a finger to her lips.

“Shh, it’s fine. I won’t cross that line. But I couldn’t keep that inside anymore, either. G’night, sweetheart.” He pushed himself up off the couch, heading for his bunk, but her hand reached out to wrap around his forearm. “Need something?” he asked.

“You,” was the mouthed reply and his lips were crushing down on hers, pulling out the ache she had been drowning under.

~~~

The set of light blue eyes bounced back and forth between the laughing duo as Leia tried her best to mimic Ashton’s yoga poses. “This is impossible!” Leia’s laugh rang out as she struggled to keep her balance.

“What are you talking about?” Ashton laughed with her, his hand shooting out to help keep her steady. “You’re doing great. I gotcha.”

“Whatcha guys up to?” Luke spoke up, eyebrows raised as he leaned against the wall.

Leia let out a yelp of surprise and wobbled, taking Ashton with her as they crashed to the ground, erupting in more giggles. “Lu-lu, you scared me!” Leia scolded her brother lightly as Ashton helped her to her feet.

“Mmm,” Luke nodded, pursing his lips in thought. “So, you gonna tell me? Or are you going to keep lying to me like you lied about Wyatt?”

“What are you talking about?” Leia asked, narrowing her eyes. She and Ashton had taken every precaution to keep their growing relationship as hidden as possible. The plan was to tell everyone when the tour was over, along with announcing that she’d be moving into his place in LA. Wyatt, however, was the secret she had wanted to take to her grave.

“Mum and Dad got the hospital bill, dumbass. They called me wondering if I knew anything about three broken ribs because you tell me everything. Imagine my shock when I was just as in the dark as they were.”

“Luke I-” she started.

“Why’d you lie?” he cut her off.

“I was embarrassed!” she screamed, throwing up her hands. “It’s embarrassing, Luke! I got beat up by a guy who swore he loved me! Who had us all fooled that he was a good guy! Do you know how embarrassing it is to have been that bad of a judge of character?!”

“You’re not a bad judge of character, Leia. Like you said, he had us all fooled. And you’re with Ash, aren’t you? Yeah, definitely not a bad judge of character. Not by a long shot.”

“Wait… you’re not mad?”

“No! Well… yes. But only because you lied.”

“We were gonna tell you, mate,” Ashton jumped in. “We were going to tell everyone after the tour wrapped up.”

“I’m not talking to you!” Luke snapped.

“Luke, you just said you weren’t mad about this,” Ashton said, his jaw setting.

“You lied to me! I’m your friend, Ashton! Damn near your brother!” His fiery gaze flickered over to Leia, “And I’m your actual brother!” His words held no malice, only a deep hurt that two people he cared deeply for thought that they had to keep their relationship a secret from him.

“Lu-lu, we were going to tell you. We just…”

“How long?”

“Six months,” Ashton answered. “And if we’re clearing the air, then you should know that when we get home next month, she’s moving into my place.”

Luke nodded. “Okay then. Break her heart, and it’ll be you who ends up with your ribs broken.”

“Lucas Robert!” Leia scolded, punching her brother’s arm.

“Too soon?” Luke laughed.

“Way too soon,” Leia laughed with him. “So, you’re really not mad?”

Luke shook his head. “I only ever wanted you to be happy, Le-le. You’re my twin. I’m always on your side.” He wrapped her in a tight hug.

“We’re sorry, mate,” Ashton apologized, placing his hand on Luke’s shoulder and a kiss on Leia’s hairline.

Luke fake gagged, stepping away. “I’m not that happy for you! That’s still my baby sister you’re kissing.”

“Well, I love her, so you better get used to it.”

“You fuckin’ better,” the siblings responded in unison.

“So fuckin’ much.”

Tag List

@goeatsomelife @flameraine @cashtonasff5sos @here-for-the-uproars @cxddlyash @1-irwin-94 @baldcalum @sparkling-chaos @tea4sykes @youngblood199456 @5-seconds-of-obsession @gosh-im-short @aquarius-hood1996 @talkfastromance4

#confessions #ashton irwin #luke hemming #ashton irwin fic #luke hemmings fic #5sos #galcal irwin

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imagines-dreams · 5 years

Text

At the School Shooting - Lucifer Morningstar

Rating: PG-13

Warnings: mentions of death, school shooting, torture, negative views on the NRA

Summary: Lucifer fell in love with you, a kindergarten teacher. No one would expect you or your job to be involved in any of Lucifer’s and Chloe’s cases. Unfortunately, one of the suspect’s targets works at your school.

Word Count: 3295

You bent down at the knees and smiled at the little boy. “I think that’s a brilliant idea, Milo.” You ruffled his hair. “I’ll ask the other teachers, and we can see if we can have a day dedicated to pajamas and stuffed animals, yeah?”

Your student giggled. “Thank you, Ms. (Y/l/n).”

“You’re welcome, Milo. I’ll see you tomorrow, ok, bud?”

He nodded and ran to the P.E. teacher.

You smiled and waved the coach goodbye. No more children were left to pass along, so you smiled and headed to your classroom. You cleaned up the scattered toys and filed forgotten homework.

“Hello.”

You jumped and laughed. “Luce,” you giggled. You turned around and leaned against your desk. “You know, it’s been months, and I’m still not used to that.”

“Well, it’s been months and,” Lucifer said, looking around the room full of bright colors and toys for children, “I’m still not used to all…” Lucifer motioned to your classroom. “All this. It’s so… domestic. Boring. Dull. Where’s the danger? The excitement?”

You beamed. “I’m a kindergarten teacher, Luce.”

“Well aware of that disgusting fact, darling. Which is why I’m” -your boyfriend pulled you closer by your waist- “very excited to bring you back home later today, hm?”

You shook your head and looked up to Lucifer. “I have papers to grade.”

“Mhm.” He leaned down, his lips brushing against your earlobe, and whispered, “You know I’m impatient.”

“Lucifer,” you whined.

“Ah, well, isn’t that beautiful sound?”

You placed your hands on his chest. “Lucifer.”

“Yes, darling?”

You pushed him away and laughed. “I still have work.”

Lucifer stared at your hands on his chest and back at you. He raised his eyebrow and began to laugh. “Uh, sweetheart, I don’t think this is how it’s supposed to go.”

You beamed and turned to clean up the room. Your kids often left many toys on the floor and forgot to place books back on the proper shelves.

Lucifer continued, “You see, how it’s supposed to happen is I appear here, in your classroom.” He snuck up behind you and wrapped his arms around your waist and arms, preventing you from picking up the puppet from the floor and making you giggle again. “Maybe kiss you once.” Lucifer leaned forward and kissed your cheek. “Twice, if needed.” He left a lingering kiss on your neck. “Then, I don’t know, carry you to your desk, maybe whisper some choice words I only want to tell you.” Lucifer’s honeyed voice filled your ear and tickled your cheek.

You closed your eyes and tried to not pay attention, and even though Lucifer’s tricks didn’t work on you, you still couldn’t help the weak feeling in your knees and lungs and chest. You shook your head. “Luce,” you complained. You craned your neck to the side you could look in his eyes. “Look, as much as I’d love… part of what you said, I actually, really, need to work.” You escaped Lucifer’s tempting and comforting embrace and picked up that misplaced puppet. “That and the kids will come back in an hour.”

“I can do a lot of things in an hour,” Lucifer smirked.

Memories of you and Lucifer together just flashed in your mind, when Lucifer’s phone vibrated. You bit your lip and nodded. “You’re on a case, aren’t you?”

“I’m always on a case, darling, but,” the consultant swiftly took out his phone and sighed, “I do hate being interrupted.” He smiled at you and kissed you quickly and before leaving, he added, “And I promise you, love, I will be back for that fantasy of ours.”

“Of yours, Lucifer!” you yelled back.

Your phone vibrated. Its unbecoming to lie my queen.

You smiled and sent back a devil emoji. You pocketed your phone before your poor king of hell could tell you how insulted he was. Instead, you continued cleaning and organizing. You checked your schedule. Next was an hour of reading time and then nap time.

When the coach returned your students to you, you already had the book to read to the kids ready, a bright picture book with big text and easy words.

“Alright, settle down, children.” You laughed as two of your kids hugged your legs and tried to pull you down. You sat down in your chair and clapped your hands twice. Half of your class clapped twice, so you clapped once again. You counted the number of children while they settled down on the mat. All twenty-three kids were well and accounted for.

You grinned. “Alright, let’s begin our story today.” You held up the big book.

“Paging Mr. Albright. Mr. Albright, please report to the office.”

Your eyes widened, but the announcement principal repeated, “Again, Mr. Albright, please report to the office.”

You gulped. “Unfortunately, there’s been a change of plans,” you explained to the children.

Little Kayla tilted her head. “Mr. Albright?”

You licked your lips and set down your book. You never thought it would happen at your school with your students, but you always knew there was a chance. You’ve trained for this. You smiled at Kayla and got up to lock the doors. “Does anyone remember what Mr. Albright does?”

Your kids stayed silent. They knew. They were aware of what was going on.

You smiled at them. “Don’t worry. We’ve practiced this remember.” You pulled on the door and peeked outside the window to see your fellow teachers doing the same thing. You covered the window with a poster and turned off the lights. “Now, as long as we follow the rules, we’re going to be ok.”

The kids nodded and got to work. Even though most of them were only five years old, they seemed to understand, at the very least, that they were in danger.

Mr. Albright was the name of the man who established the school decades ago. He was dead. His name was used to warn the school when someone spotted a shooter.

Many of your kids lined up in front of the cubbies. Some grabbed their friends hands, and a few grabbed their toys to hold onto during the lockdown. One of them, though, Jeremiah walked up to you. “Ms. (Y/l/n),” he whispered.

“What is it?”

He gulped and lifted his foot and slowly dropped it onto the floor. His shoe lit up the room.

“Jeremiah!” a few kids whined.

The little boy jumped into your already open arms. You rubbed his back. “Jeremiah, it’s ok. You’re ok.” You gulped and set him down. “Let’s remove your shoes, ok?” When he nodded, you removed his light-up shoes and set them down in the closet by the door. You picked him up and walked over to the rest of your kids. “Everyone remembers what to do, right?”

You stayed as close the cubbies as possible, recounted the kids, and closed the door with all of you inside. “Ok, so it’s quiet time until they ask for Mrs. Miller is called. Quiet games and hands close to your heart, yes?”

Your kids nodded and turned to each other to play a game you taught them, chopsticks.

You gulped and set Jeremiah down to play with him.

You let him win every single time and wiped his eyes when his tears leaked. You recounted the kids. All twenty-three. Kayla, a smart little girl who loved building houses out of legos, was reading a book in the dark. Grant, a noisy kid who loved to sing, was biting down on his bottom lip and lightly tapping his fingers against his legs. Little Maisy, a quiet and shy child, was watching some of her friends, Lani and Ursa, as they made shapes with their hands.

It broke your heart that your kids had to worry about this. That they had to go through drills like this once every few months. They didn’t deserve to actually go through a lockdown like this.

Then again, no child ever deserved a harsher reality like the one you were in.

Minutes had passed. No announcement over the loudspeaker.

Grant wiggled his way to you and asked, “Is it over yet?”

You shook your head. “Not yet. They haven’t called for Mrs. Miller, remember?”

Your student nodded. “I miss my mom and dad.” The five-year-old sniffed and bit his lip again.

“It’s ok, Grant. They’ll be here soon.”

His eyes went wide and he shook his head. “No!”

“Grant,” you sternly whispered. The other kids shushed him, too.

Then, Grant’s eyes filled with tears and he shook his head. “I don’t want Mommy and Daddy here. They could get hurt, Ms. (Y/l/n).”

You blinked away your own tears and held his hands. “It’s ok, Grant. Your parents won’t get hurt ok? I promise.” You looked to your students and smiled. “Nothing is going to happen to you while I’m here.” You hugged Grant and watched as your other kids silently went back to their silent activities.

You knew you’d sacrifice yourself if anything bad were to happen.

Hopefully, it wouldn’t come to that.

BANG! BANG! BANG!

The kids screamed. SOme shushed the others, but all of them huddled around you. You grit your teeth and held as many kids close to you as possible. Everyone’s sobs were muffled, but even so, you knew that if the shooter came near the door, he would hear them. You tried to calmly shush your students, and it partially worked, but you couldn’t help the way your heart shattered at their screams.

Then, the fire alarm went off.

Your kids started crying again. “Shouldn’t we-”

“No,” you frantically responded. “No, we’re staying right here, ok? We’re going to be ok.”

BANG!

Your kids cried.

BANG!

Tim cried in your lap.

BANG!

Harriet yelped.

BANG!

Oscar prayed.

You held onto your kids and shushed them as best you could.

...

There were no more gunshots. Not for a few minutes. The sobs were muffled at best, and all of your kids were quivering, too afraid to move away from you.

“Mrs. Miller, please report to the parking lot. Mrs. Miller, please report to the parking lot. All parents are waiting.”

Your kids cheered, but the announcement wasn’t over. You recognized that voice, too. It wasn’t the principal. “And, (Y/n), call Lucifer. Now, please.”

Your kids broke past the door and huddled around the locked classroom exit. “Ok, everyone follows me to the parking lot, ok? Hold hands. Hold hands, please!”

Every kid grabbed someone else’s hand, and you recounted them. Twenty-three. Everyone was ok. You nodded and peeled the poster off the window. You peeked around to see the other teachers doing the same. Two teachers left the classroom and searched the hallways.

Both of them came back and gave a thumbs up.

You unlocked the door and led the kids to the parking lot. As you watched parents scoop up their kids and kids running to their parents, you called Lucifer.

From Chloe’s tired and worried tone, you could piece together a general timeline. The shooter was connected to Lucier’s current case somehow. Part of their plan was the shoot someone at the school you worked in. Lucifer and Chloe arrived during shooting, and the criminal was being punished by your boyfriend.

And since the shooter threatened your safety, you doubt Lucifer was following the law he enforced.

“Darling, now’s not a great time.”

“Why not, Lucifer?” You pursed your lips. “Lucifer, where are you?”

“I can assure you, I’m somewhere far away..” His voice went dark. “Don’t worry, love, this man isn’t going to hurt anyone ever again.”

“Wait, Lucifer!” You took a deep breath. “Look, I hate that person with all of my being. He threatened my students, Lucifer. Only a few of them are barely six, and the rest are five. None of them deserved the fear and pain they just went through, and you’re right, whoever you’re with, they deserve to be punished.”

“Ah, so you see my point of view. Then, allow me to-”

“No.”

“No?”

“Lucifer, you’re a good person. It’s why I love you, and you know that killing him, torturing him right now, is wrong.” You took a deep breath. “Turn him in. Chloe and Dan and Ella, they will make sure to it that they’re punished for what they’ve done.”

“But, sweetheart… I don’t understand. This excuse of a soul doesn’t deserve due process and all that mumbo jumbo. He threatened you-”

“I know. I know, Luce, but… but right now, I don’t need Lucifer, the punisher of everyone’s sins and the ruler of all Hell. Right now,” you sniffed as the gunshots from before echoed in your mind, “I need my boyfriend.” You gulped. “Turn him in, Lucifer. Please.”

Lucifer was silent for a few moments, and if you listened hard enough, you could hear somebody whimpering. Still, Lucifer stayed quiet before he relented. “Tell the Detective I’ll be there in a few minutes.”

You cracked out a painful laugh. “Thank you, Lucifer. I’ll see you soon.”

He scoffed. “Anything for you, darling.”

All the kids were dismissed, being checked by EMT’s and the police. Apparently, the shooter had a list of people he wanted to kill, all people who had “wronged” him in some way. That list included the assistant principal, who “took” his job. Mrs. Langston was critically injured, already in the hospital. Mr. Juarez, the assistant second grade teacher, Mr. Smith, the secretary, and Elena, the student body president, were shot on sight. There were several other students and a few staff members were injured and were being rushed to the hospital. The last number you heard was twelve in the hospital.

“You’re a sight for sore eyes.”

You blinked away your tears and smiled up at him. “You’re back.” You glanced at his hands. “Glad to see you didn’t do anything incriminating.”

“I never said that.” Lucifer unbuttoned his tuxedo jacket and sat on the bench next to you. His eyes never left you. “Are you ok?”

The gunshots still echoed in your head. You bit your lip and closed your eyes. You could still feel the children’s tears soaking through the shirt and clinging to your body. You had taught the kids well, though. They knew what to do. They knew the coded warning. They knew to hide in the closet with the cubbies. Even Jeremiah asked you about his light-up shoes. He knew that the shooter could see it.

…

Kids shouldn’t have to think about. They’re only five, for goodness sake. They shouldn’t have to go through drills. They shouldn’t have to worry about their parents coming to get them. They shouldn’t have to worry about their own life at a place meant for love and learning. You were there to teach and to take care of children, not to calm them down when they hear gunshots in the school.

“(Y/n),” Lucifer sighed and wrapped his arms around you. Only when his vest got wet did you realize you were crying. You shook your head and moved in closer to him.

Lucifer held you close. “Nothing’s going to hurt you,” he said. “Not while I’m here, ok? You’re ok. As long as I’m alive, you’re going to be ok.”

You shook your head. “I know that.” You sniffed and gazed up at him. “I just…” You sighed. “Those kids. Everyone in this school. They don’t deserve this.” You gulped. “Luce, one of them died.” You smiled a sad smile. “Elena Martin, she was an amazing kid. Gonna go to Oaks high next year. You know what she wanted to be?”

Lucifer shook his head.

You smiled. “She talked to Chloe last time you were here. She loved her, and she wanted to be an officer.” You blinked a few times. “But, she… she died, and she can’t go to Oaks or prom or even college.” You shook your head. “It’s unfair.”

“I know, darling.” Your boyfriend rubbed your back. “It’s horrifying, and I was the king of Hell.” He gulped. “If you need anything…”

“You’ll be there.” You smiled and nodded. “I know.” You kissed his cheek and snuggled into his chest. “I think… I think I just need to go home.”

Lucifer smiled. “Of course.” He kissed the top of your head. “Let’s go.”

~ - ~

You stared at the memorial. Five people died, three on the site and two in the hospital. Less than a month after the school shooting, the white wall was painted with their portraits and legacies. You left a lily on the floor and smiled at the portraits. They wouldn’t be forgotten. Mrs. Langston, Mr. Smith, Elena Martin, Indigo Newman, and Maria Sarmiento.

“Hey, (Y/n)!”

“Oh,” you smiled, “hey, Xavier.”

“You gotta check out the news. Your club owner boyfriend’s on there.”

You tilted your head. “What?”

“Come on!”

You laughed and followed your co-worker. He was right. A picture of Lucifer Morningstar, your boyfriend, was plastered on the screen. “Renown owner of Lux has suddenly pulled sponsorship to multiple companies and politicians. When asked for a statement regarding why Mr. Morningstar had made such a drastic move, he said, ‘I know evil when I see it, and anyone who supports the NRA, well, let’s just say I’ll see them well after death, if you know what I mean.’ Many other companies have started to follow in Mr. Morningstar’s steps, presumably worried that the owner of the Lux chain will do the same to them.

“Safe to say, Mr. Morningstar is a very powerful individual. He’s scared companies and politicians alike, and his recent actions have caused the hashtag, DeathToNRA, to trend in the Top Ten Hashtags for the last hour.”

You laughed and shook your head. “Classic Lucifer.”

“Uh, guys? All the kids are in the parking lot.”

You turned around, and lo and behold, all the kids, kindergarten to eighth, were outside, crowding over one car and one driver.

Y0u and all the teachers ran outside, and you laughed. “Lucy, what are you doing here?” you shouted.

“Hello, darling! Hold on one second!” He smiled at one of the seventh graders and handed him something. “I’ll be right there! Yes, um, Detective and, uh, Dan, can you hand the rest out, please. Thank you.” Lucifer jumped out of his car and ran over to you. “Hello, my darling.” He kissed you once and gestured to the crowd of students. “How do you like it?”

“Um, Luce, what exactly is, uh, it?”

“Well, isn’t it obvious? I knew the children were distressed from the incident, so I’ve decided to come bearing gifts. I was going to give them cond-”

“Lucifer!”

“I know. It’s a shame Ms. Lopez replaced all the gifts with toys and video games and those stuffed toys.”

You laughed. “Oh, thank goodness for Ella. I’ve gotta thank her next time.”

“Thank her? I beg your pardon.”

You laughed and shook your head. “And thank you, Lucifer Morningstar.” You wrapped your arms around his neck and kissed him.

Lucifer hummed against your lips and pulled you closer to him by your waist. His lips left yours for a second, so he could say, “Now that’s more like it, darling.”

You laughed and kissed him quickly. “Thank you, Lucifer. Really.”

“For what?” He smirked. “You need to be more specific.”

You shook your head. “For taking me home after the incident. For being patient with me and my grieving. For pulling your sponsorships. For giving gifts to the kids.” You smiled at your students, who were getting the toys of their dreams from Dan and Chloe. “You’re amazing, Lucifer.”

Lucifer blinked, somehow shocked at that obvious piece of information. He recovered easily with a smile. “I try to be. For you. Like I told you, you’re going to be ok. As long as I’m alive.”

#lucifer netflix #lucifer morningstar #lucifer morningstar x reader #lucifer morningstar oneshot #lucifer morningstar imagine #tw #tw: guns #tw: death #tw: shooting #tw: school shooting #tw: negative views on NRA

671 notes · View notes

the-100-fanfiction · 5 years

Text

The Morning After (Bellarke Story Part 2)

Don’t worry all! I’m setting up my AO3 account soon so you won’t have to scroll for ten years to read these posts!

BELLAMY

My memories from last are a blur. I remember dancing with all my friends, drinking at the bar, laughing, drinking some more. Then nothing. At least until the end of the night. That I remember perfectly clear--despite how drunk I was.

I remember stumbling into her room, unable to keep my hands off her. Her hands yanked at my clothes, desperately wanting to get them off. My mouth was all over her, every inch of bare skin I could find. I couldn’t get enough. Then we were both naked, falling onto the bed, our limbs intertwined.

Voices outside interrupt my thoughts and yank me back to reality, and as soon as it does her name rings through my mind like glass shattering in a library...Echo.

Shit. What have I done?

Before I even register what I’m doing, I’m dressed and sneaking out of Clarke’s room while she lays blissfully asleep.

I need to find Echo. Now.

CLARKE

I roll over on my back, stretching my hands high above my head and pointing my toes as far away in the opposite direction. A smile spreads across my face as I remember last night. The dancing, the laughing. Bellamy.

I reach my hand over to the other side of the bed, to find nothing. I turn over to see if he’s somewhere else in the room, maybe he’s in the bathroom? But the bathroom door is wide open, and he’s nowhere to be found.

Did I imagine last night? It wouldn’t have been the first time that I dreamt of what it would be like to sleep with him. I sit up, my bladder forcing me to move earlier than I want to, when I feel it. The tenderness between my thighs.

It wasn’t a dream then. But if they had slept together, where was he? Bellamy Blake is not the kind of guy to sneak off in the middle of the night without a word.

I scurry over to the bathroom, one eye closed as I try to maintain my balance since my head is thumping like nobodies business. After peeing, I wash myself off quickly, throw on some clean clothes, and head out to find the others.

To no surprise, most of the gang was in the Workman’s bar, nursing hangovers with some breakfast. Except for Bellamy--and Echo. Dammit. I had forgotten about Echo up to this point. How on Earth had I forgotten about Bellamy’s girlfriend??

Part of me didn’t want to admit it, but I had been wishing for this to happen for a while now. To be with Bellamy. I realized that I loved him more than as my best friend when he returned to the ground. I’d tried to shove the feelings down as best I could, after all he had, no has, a girlfriend. One that he’s been with for years.

I had forgotten about all of it last night though. It was just him and me and our family, having fun. I wanted him so badly last night. When he put his hand on my waist on the dance floor, I felt every emotion, every desire pour out of me. I didn’t even realize I had kissed him at first. The next thing I knew he was pulling me out of there, back to my apartment.

The happiness I felt this morning, even just moments ago, fell away as I realized what must have happened this morning.

He remembered her. Echo. And being the selfless man that he is, wouldn’t want to hurt her in anyway. He’d gone back to her this morning when he realized he’d made a mistake last night.

It hurt. Badly. But I’m used to pain. Used to holding it in to keep everyone else together. I’ve done it before and I can do it now. As I step up to the table with everyone else and take a seat, I plaster the best “everything is fine” grin on my face that I can muster.

“Miller, you look like shit,” I say. His only response is a glare before his head finds comfort in his arms on the tabletop again. “Did everyone have fun last night?”

“Murphy was just telling me how much fun you had last night Clarke,” Raven adds in, and my heart drops. I didn’t even think about if any of the others had seen Bellamy and I kiss last night. Or if they’d seen us leave the hall together.

“Oh,” is all I can think to say.

“Yeah. Apparently you were tearing up the dance floor without me. Bitch.” She says with a smile. So she doesn’t know. I do a quick search around the table to see if anyone shows signs up knowing more, but if they do, no one is fessing up.

I smile back, partly with relief. If no one knew, it would be easier to pretend like nothing happened.

“Where did you and Big Brother go at the end of the night? I looked up and you were both gone.” Octavia asks.

“I went home. I genuinely have no idea where Bellamy is though.” A half truth. I don’t know where Bellamy is. And I had gone home last night. I just left out the part that he went home with me.

As if I’m cursed by the gods, the sheer mention of his name brings him and Echo walking through the bar doors. We make eye contact for a split second before I turn my gaze back to the table.

They’re walking side by side. No sign of tension or anger. No sign that he told her about last night. A small bead of hope was crushed inside me at the sight. I had hoped he would tell her, that he would end things with her and tell me that he had been in love with me too. But it was a fairytale. And my life is more like a reoccurring nightmare, that is, except for Madi. Madi was my single spotlight of happiness.

It’s fine. He didn’t want last night to happen, so it didn’t. As far as I’m concerned, I went home by myself, I slept with no one, and I’m the same person I was yesterday.

“Hey guys,” he says, his voice low and rough. My heart aches at the sound of it.

“Bellamy. Didn’t think you’d have the energy to join us this morning,” Murphy says with his usual sarcasm and attitude.

“What the hell does that mean Murphy?” Bellamy challenges back.

Emori answers for him. “You drank me and Murphy under the table last night. I’m surprised you’re even standing right now.”

“Yeah, well, it was a night to celebrate.” He says more calmly, taking a seat at the other end of the table with Echo taking the last empty seat beside him.

Enough chit chat. The only way I can make it through this is to keep my mind busy, and there’s plenty that needs to be done.

“We need to talk about the plan. What we’re going to do with the rest of our people up on the ship. How we’re going to bring them down. How we’re going to build a life here with these people.” They all look at me as I say this, and look right back at each one, except him.

“We can’t bring every one of them down at once. That kind of influx would drought this place of everything. Food, clothing, housing. All of it.” Raven says.

“I agree. So we do it in phases. With the help of the people here. We make sure we have the resources in place. We’ll need to put together a transition plan. Make it go smoothly on both sides.”

“John and I can help with the transition plan,” Emori offers. I nod my head in thanks.

“Miller, Echo. Do you guys think you can go through the manifesto of people up there. Figure out how many people we can wake at a time, who we should wake up first, and then be there to persuade anyone from doing anything stupid here?” I ask. I try to not let my emotions show in my eyes as I look at her. I think I do a pretty good job, because she responds with, “Of course.” Miller simply grunts in response.

Bellamy hadn’t taken his eyes off me this whole time. I tried not to notice, not to even look in his direction. But I could feel his gaze on me with every word I spoke.

“Okay. I’ll talk to Madi about how she wants to address this with the people. We should get started right away though. Our people have been asleep long enough.” I stand up and turn to leave the bar without waiting for anyone else to say anything. I’m halfway across the courtyard when I feel a hand grab my forearm.

“Hey-“ I start to say, before I realize it’s Bellamy.

“Clarke,” he says back. His voice is urgent, pained.

I pull my arm free and cross them both over my chest, making direct eye contact with him. I wasn’t some lovestruck teenager. I wasn’t going to weep and cry about “How could he do this to me?”

“What,” is all I say. My response must have thrown him off guard because he took a small step back.

“I…we need to talk about…about last night,” he says.

“What about it?” I counter.

“We both had a lot to drink, and I know I wasn’t thinking straightly, but—”

I cut him off before he could say the words that would crumble me. “Listen Bellamy. I already know what you’re going to say. It was a mistake. We were both drunk, and it should have never happened. In fact, we’re just going to pretend like it never happened. Okay? So you’re fine. We’re fine. Everything is the way it should be.”

Bellamy stands there for a few moments without saying anything. His eyes are blazing with some kind of emotion though, but I can’t tell which one. He finally says, “that’s truly what you think?”

“That’s how things are.” I wasn’t going to give up the tough girl act. It was the only thing holding me together.

“Okay princess,” he says with a bite of anger.

“Okay,” I snap back before turning on my heels. I changed direction without realizing it, going back to my apartment. Once I was inside, I shut the door, locked it, and sunk to the ground, tears falling down my face and silent sobs rolled over me.

BELLAMY

Shit. I stood there in the courtyard, watching Clarke stomp away without looking back.

When I left this morning, I went to talk to Echo, to tell her we needed to end things. She was surprisingly okay with it. She said that she had felt them drifting apart for a while, and that she would always care for me. I felt the same too. We had something special once, when it was just the six of us in space, watching Praimfaya destroy their home. But things were different now. He was different.

And then last night happened, and it all snapped in to place. Clarke was what I had been missing in my life. The missing piece.

I was going to tell her, to go back to her apartment before she woke up. But as Echo and I walked through the courtyard, I had seen Clarke walk into the bar. When I got there though, she wouldn’t look at me. I didn’t think when I left her place this morning about how she would feel waking up without me there. I was so worried about setting things straight with Echo so Clarke and I could have a chance, if she wanted to have a chance, that I didn’t even think.

And then she said all that stuff. About last night being a mistake. It hurt. And before I knew it, I was pissed and all I did was make everything worse. Apparently, she didn’t want a chance at ‘us’. But I didn’t even fight for her. Didn’t try to talk.

I know Clarke. Better than anyone. I know she was upset and was speaking out of anger. I should have fought for her. Made her listen to what I had to say. And then if she still insisted on it being a mistake, I would have walked away. No hesitation. But I didn’t. I just stood there and watched her walk away.

“Dammit Blake. What are you doing here?” I whisper to myself.

I need to make things right. Whatever I need to do, however long it takes. I need to make things right with Clarke.

#clarke griffin #bellamy blake #the 100 #bellarke fanfiction #bellarke #the 100 fandom #clarke and bellamy #the 100 season six #the 100 season seven #bellarke fanfic #bellarke fandom

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suggers-got-dingled · 7 years

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ok so I know it's been two whole days and everyone's probably ~~over~~ the buzz by now but I never will be until my dying day and I still have many feelings that keep bursting out in sudden rushes of weeping, smiling emotion every time I think about and look at my photos from the TV choice awards so whilst I'm finally feeling more human yet shattered and still in my bubble of happiness and daze and joy and laughter that seems to treble in potency late at night I'm here to relive the best moments from 4th September 2017 which is now officially declared National Ryan Hawley Day by his number one fan and tv husband Daniel Benedict Miller *deep breath* here we go...

getting off the Leeds to London train to find out Iain, Sally, Charlotte and John were also on it and we were completely oblivious to the fact we were sharing the same enclosed air as soap's best loved cast and most loathed man lmao (honestly we should have known from then on that it was going to be the most momentous day?!????)

seeing Iain once again as he walks past and ignores a group of very bitter robron fans whilst everyone tries their best to hold back with a couple of oooh's here and there, awkward tension that you could literally cut with a knife and comment of the night "can we all hush because he won't give us robron back at all" WHAT IS THIS TUMULTUOUS LIFE I LIVE I HIGH KEY WANTED TO LEAVE EARTH

the same very bitter robron fans forgetting about any foregoing drama, gathering together both in person and online to love and appreciate and support our boys. Meeting fans we'd spoke to for months (even years) for the first time and instantly connecting because of our mutual passion. It was just so pure???? and lovely??? and comfortable???? how happy and delighted and wrapped up in dryan we all were sat on those cold, hard floors cuddling for warmth, bonding and crying over how kind everyone was being as we posted our photos. It was one of - if not my favourite - times in the fandom (aside from the soap awards) and it made me realise why we're all still here on this rollercoaster journey

all being in a designated group waiting in anticipation for Danny and Ryan content as well as their arrival on the red carpet and making the loudest most inhumane noise as soon as the first photo was released, to say all eyes on us was an understatement IT WAS GR8

getting the news of more photos and videos and interviews and articles and reacting together it just made the experience so!! much!! more!!! special!!!

chatting with Kate Oates for a good few minutes and her giving an awkward side eyed chuckle as we tell her we miss her and need her back HONESTLY she is such a babe and I think she just about gets our current despair lmao bless

completely missing Danny and Ryan rolling up looking a solid 12/10 as they dive straight in the door and feeling deflated but also on top of the world (pretty sure my only view was Ryan's blonde locks sticking out from the crowd of heads and I have never felt more fortunate)

deciding to sit round the front in the dark and wait for any signs of the boys whilst contemplating how and why this god damn ceremony won't just start and it ending up being THE MOST SUCCESSFUL DECISION OF ALL DECISIONS

some random man asking if we're waiting for Danny Miller because he sensed 'that vibe' I don't think I've ever related to a passer by so much in my life it was amazing

seeing Danny first (of course, how many times does that boy want to take a cig break outside?!?!) him casually strolling over to us after he'd dealt with the sought attention on the other side whilst we're all must remain cool and collected, must try and not transport my thoughts from my brain to my mouth about how much I want to rip that suit without a tie off him and ruffle his perfect hair

him being the sarciest little shit??? "you travel about you lot don't you" were the very first words to come out of his mouth and I'm just??? thanks Danny for reminding me what a high key mess my life is it's all because of you I hope you know that!!

him saying he'd record Ryan's speech before the knowledge of him winning was actually in (LOL HE SO KNEW AND I'VE NEVER KNOWN SOMEONE BE SUCH AN ENTHUSIASTIC FANGIRL FOR RYAN HAWLEY I WOULD HAVE SOLD MY SOUL TO SEE HIS NERVOUS BEAMING LIL FACE THE MOMENT HIS NAME WAS ANNOUNCED)

Danny saying Ryan said he'd come out to see us later and us being all *insert everybody calm down it's happening gif here*

THE MOMENT WE FOUND OUT RYAN HAD INDEED WON BEST ACTOR AND NOW BOTH OUR BOYS WERE AWARD WINNING ACTORS there were genuine tears of merriment with hands clasped over faces it was a beautiful sight to behold and I've never been as ecstatic

Danny coming out (again) once the show was over and Emmerdale had smashed yet another award show, us applauding from a distance and Danny cheering with us from the other side of the road

us getting told to be quiet by the security for the hundredth time that night

then the biggest blur of the century occurring almost immediately afterwards as Danny tells us he's gonna bring the winning man out to us not even giving us chance to compose ourselves

A WILD RYAN HAWLEY APPEARS WITH THE BIGGEST GRIN ON HIS FACE CLUTCHING HIS SHINY AWARD AND MY LUNGS NEARLY GIVE IN

DANNY FOLLOWS RIGHT BEHIND HIM LOOKING SO UNBELIEVABLY HAPPY AND PROUD OF HIM HE WAS ON THE BIGGEST HIGH AND I DON'T THINK I'VE EVER SEEN HIM LIKE THAT EVEN WHEN HE'S WON HIMSELF, HE HAS SO MUCH SUPPORT AND LOVE FOR HIS CO STARS IT'S SO UPLIFTING

RYAN'S FACE AS HE HEADED TOWARDS TO US WHEN HE TURNED HIS HEAD AND SAW US ALL THERE I'M LITERALLY NEVER GETTING OVER IT him straight away asking us if we'd voted, thanking us for doing so whilst telling us how much winning means to him with his dedicated adorable speech. Him saying he thought John would win and being totally shocked, he genuinely never expected it all and he was so grateful and appreciative as everyone was congratulating him and singing our proud praises WHY IS HE SO FUCKING LIFE RUININGLY LOVEABLE AND ADORABLE AND MODEST HE'S THE CUTEST ANGEL I CAN'T STOP THINKING ABOUT HIS SMILE AND HIS SWEET WORDS

Ryan just melting my heart to mush and reminding me why I hold so much admiration for him I'm just so honoured to have seen him right after his win and so unbelievably pleased we could show him outright the love he deserves and has instead of hearing it from second person IT WAS SO CHILLED AND SO PLEASANT TO SEE RYAN SO RELAXED MEETING US I DON'T THINK I'VE EVER SEEN HIM SO AT EASE AT A TIME WHEN HE ACTUALLY LEAVES HIS HOUSE (the drinks and Danny’s company probably helped)

DANNY JUST STANDING BACK AND LETTING RYAN DO HIS THING AS HE PRACTICALLY PUSHES HIM TOWARDS US EMOTIONAL AWAITING FANS I'm getting flutters in my tummy typing this out why am I like this why do they do this to me like???? what the fuck??? he just started filming randomly after he purposely went inside to bring him out and let him know there's plenty of people who are proud of him??? like he needed to witness him all there with us and he came out with him as backup because he wanted to record the moment we all gave him double the love he gives him on a daily basis I will never ever ever ever recover from this HOW WILL IT SINK IN HELP ME

us being completely unaware that Danny was filming at first and then just being in a state of belief about it, after we found out it was on Instagram and watched it back it was meltdown I tell you I have never been so thankful to be hidden behind a bush LMAO WILL I EVER GET OVER DANNY GLADLY EXPOSING US ALL AND CAPTURING THE FOCUS OF MY FRIEND JADE AND HER LIL CONFUSED WAVE NO I WILL NOT IT MAKES MY LIFE LIKE YOU WOULDN'T BELIEVE

Danny getting us into trouble by the security for the third time that night and him just howling about the fact whilst carrying on filming despite the professional demands HE'S JUST WALKING AROUND FILMING HIS KING WHY THEY GOTTA RUIN THE VIBE IDC IF PEOPLE ARE SLEEPING RYAN HAWLEY AND DANNY MILLER ARE WITHIN REACHING DISTANCE IN THE SAME ZONE LET US ENJOY THE EUPHORIA

Danny being a cheeky, playful little shit 2.0 "where's that video going then" "never you mind" *smug smile and wink* "you so knew Ryan had won didn't you that's why you said you'd film the iconic moment for us???" "oh I can’t tell you that can I" *another smug smile and wink* I LOVE HIM WITH ALL MY HEART

A DRYAN PHOTO MY FUCKING DREAM COME TRUE I WAS SHOOKETH TO THE CORE I STILL AM I CAN'T STOP WEEPING OVER IT EVERY TIME I CATCH A GLIMPSE OF MY LOCK SCREEN

explaining what being shooketh is to Danny and hearing that word from the horse's mouth what a weird encounter

ridiculously happy Ryan Hawley holding his award up in every single photo like a proud child receiving their first medal with a school sticker smile IT'S ALL I NEED IN LIFE HE'S SO PRECIOUS

Ryan still finding the time to be the caring dad being concerned about how fans are going to get home, introducing himself with a handshake and reassuring them with a "don't be nervous" I was all awwwww'd out it's just sheer lunacy I can't cope with him

DANNY COMPLAINING ABOUT GIN AND TONIC BEING £20 SAYING RYAN CAN GET THE DRINKS IN SEEN AS HE WON AND DIRECTING HIS NEED TO GET WRECKED IN RYAN'S INFLUENCED AND BOUNCING OFF THE WALLS AURA "let's go get fucked" - that both ends my life and resurrects me every time it crosses my mind p l e a s e

us being all I LOVE ROBRON, hugging and just genuinely being inconsolable after the power duo said bye and headed off to enjoy the party together like there's so many mixed up memories it was that overwhelming and surreal I think I'm still in the midst of a dryan hangover

walking round London at midnight on autopilot and a delusional bubble just going through the motions breathless with no idea where we are or what we're doing, not even looking when crossing the road, nearly getting run over and not even caring because if we died right there and then we'd die at peak levels of happiness

heading back on a 5hr megabus journey just absolutely shook to the core, recapping and waking up from two hours of broken sleep turning to each other and being like OH MY GOD WE ACTUALLY GOT A PICTURE WITH DANNY AND RYAN

I ended up walking through Leeds at gone 6am in the pissing down rain, my onesie and no makeup but it was well worth it to see Emmerdale sweep the board clean and the two men I owe my life to TOGETHER! IN! THE! FLESH! Honestly I wish I could bottle up the moments and the feelings and just dish it out for everyone to experience because literally nothing compared.

I really do have such an overwhelming amount of love for Danny and Ryan and I'm about to cry again like wow they are just too cute I've never seen a friendship so heartwarming, two people being so loving and tender and supportive towards each other in real life whilst being in a constant cycle of snogging, fighting, problem facing, soul consuming and devoting deeply onscreen. I'm still in disbelief I can't even concentrate on reality nothing else matters but them those two married tv husbands and I don't think I'll ever love anyone more. I was just here living a normal, basic life being a normal, basic human being and then dryan came along and changed everything hehehehe the pain. Seriously, Emmerdale has destroyed every particle of my sanity lately but it's times like this when it hits me that there's no denying they own my ass completely EVEN ON MY DEATH BED THE EVENING OF THE 4TH SEPTEMBER 2017 WILL STILL BE THE LAST I SPEAK OF DESPITE THE REST OF MY DIRE INTERNAL AND EXTERNAL LIFE EVENTS CONTINUING AS I GROW OLD

#long post #dryan #danny miller #ryan hawley #emmerdale #tv choice awards #*#this is dedicated to my anons that i haven't got round to answering yet lmao #it's taken me all night to type up who even am i #will i be sleeping right now???#of course not i'll be reliving it AGAIN #enjoy this absolute mess #i put it in a read more because it's h u g e

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ucflibrary · 7 years

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Every October UCF celebrates Diversity Week. This year’s dates are October 16 – 20, and the theme is Transform and Inspire Inclusion. University-wide departments and groups champion the breadth and culture within the UCF community, and work to increase acceptance and inclusion for everyone at UCF and the surrounding communities.

One of the fantastic things about UCF is the wide range of cultures and ethnicities of our students, staff, and faculty. We come from all over. We’re just as proud of where we are from as we are of where we are now.

For information about the Library Diversity Week activities visit: guides.ucf.edu/diversityweek

Join the UCF Libraries as we celebrate diverse voices and subjects with these suggestions (below the keep reading link)

And thank you to every Knight who works to help others feel accepted and included at UCF!

Blindspot: hidden biases of good people by Mahzarin R. Banaji and Anthony G. Greenwald In this accessible and groundbreaking look at the science of prejudice, Banaji and Greenwald show that prejudice and unconscious biases toward others are a fundamental part of the human psyche. Suggested by Sara Duff, Acquisitions & Collections

Creating a World that Works for All by Sharif Abdullah (ebook) The world is a mess. The privileged few prosper. The masses suffer. And everyone feels spiritually empty. Most people would blame capitalism, racism, or some other "ism". But according to Sharif M. Abdullah, the problem is not ideology. It's exclusivity -- our desire to stay separate from other people. In Creating a World That Works for All, Abdullah takes a look at the mess we live in -- and presents a way out. To restore balance to the earth and build community, he says, people must stop blaming others, embrace inclusivity, and become "menders". He outlines three simple tests -- for "enoughness", exchangeability, and common benefit -- to guide people as they transform themselves and the world. Suggested by Schuyler Kirby, Rosen Library

Digital Countercultures and The Struggle for Community by Jessa Lingel Whether by accidental keystroke or deliberate tinkering, technology is often used in ways that are unintended and unimagined by its designers and inventors. Jessa Lingel tells stories from the margins of countercultural communities that have made the Internet meet their needs, subverting established norms of how digital technologies should be used. She examines a social media platform (developed long before Facebook) for body modification enthusiasts, with early web experiments in blogging, community, wikis, online dating, and podcasts; a network of communication technologies (both analog and digital) developed by a local community of punk rockers to manage information about underground shows; and the use of Facebook and Instagram for both promotional and community purposes by Brooklyn drag queens. By examining online life in terms of countercultural communities, Lingel argues that looking at outsider experiences helps us to imagine new uses and possibilities for the tools and platforms we use in everyday life. Suggested by Megan Haught, Teaching & Engagement/Research & Information Services

Dreamland Burning by Jennifer Latham When Rowan Chase finds a skeleton on her family's property, she has no idea that investigating the brutal century-old murder will lead to a summer of painful discoveries about the past... and the present. Nearly one hundred years earlier, in 1821, a misguided violent encounter propels Will Tillman into a racial firestorm. In a country rife with violence against blacks and a hometown segregated by Jim Crow, Will must make hard choices on a painful journey towards self discovery and face his inner demons in order to do what's right the night Tulsa burns. Suggested by Christina Wray, Digital Learning & Engagement Librarian

Every Heart a Doorway by Seanan McGuire Children have always disappeared from Eleanor West's Home for Wayward Children under the right conditions; slipping through the shadows under a bed or at the back of a wardrobe, tumbling down rabbit holes and into old wells, and emerging somewhere ... else. But magical lands have little need for used-up miracle children. Nancy tumbled once, but now she's back. The things she's experienced ... they change a person. The children under Miss West's care understand all too well. And each of them is seeking a way back to their own fantasy world. But Nancy's arrival marks a change at the Home. There's a darkness just around each corner, and when tragedy strikes, it's up to Nancy and her new-found schoolmates to get to the heart of the matter. Suggested by Megan Haught, Teaching & Engagement/Research & Information Services

Furiously Happy: a funny book about horrible things by Jenny Lawson Jenny Lawson is beloved around the world for her inimitable humor and honesty, and in Furiously Happy, she is at her snort-inducing funniest. This is a book about embracing everything that makes us who we are - the beautiful and the flawed - and then using it to find joy in fantastic and outrageous ways. Because as Jenny's mom says, "Maybe 'crazy' isn't so bad after all." Sometimes crazy is just right. Suggested by Megan Haught, Teaching & Engagement/Research & Information Services

Gender Nonconformity and the Law by Kimberly A. Yuracko When the Civil Rights Act of 1964 was passed, its primary target was the outright exclusion of women from particular jobs. Over time, the Act's scope of protection has expanded to prevent not only discrimination based on sex but also discrimination based on expression of gender identity. Kimberly Yuracko uses specific court decisions to identify the varied principles that underlie this expansion. Filling a significant gap in law literature, this timely book clarifies an issue of increasing concern to scholars interested in gender issues and the law. Suggested by Megan Haught, Teaching & Engagement/Research & Information Services

Made by Raffi by Craig Pomranz; illustrated by Margaret Chamberlain As a shy boy, Raffi is a loner and teased at school until one day he discovers knitting and decides to make a scarf for his father and a cape for the prince in the school play. Suggested by Cindy Dancel, Research & Information Services

Symptoms of Being Human by Jeff Garvin A gender-fluid teenager who struggles with identity creates a blog on the topic that goes viral, and faces ridicule at the hands of fellow students. Suggested by Cindy Dancel, Research & Information Services

The Good People by Hannah Kent (on order) Based on true events in nineteenth century Ireland, Hannah Kent's startling new novel tells the story of three women, drawn together to rescue child from a superstitious community. Nora, bereft after the death of her husband, finds herself alone and caring for her grandson Micheál, who can neither speak nor walk. A handmaid, Mary, arrives to help Nóra just as rumours begin to spread that Micheál is a changeling child who is bringing bad luck to the valley. Determined to banish evil, Nora and Mary enlist the help of Nance, an elderly wanderer who understands the magic of the old ways. Suggested by Sara Duff, Acquisitions & Collections

The Bone People: a novel by Keri Hulme Kerewin, a part-Maori painter living in self-exile, is drawn out of her isolation by a mute boy who is cast up on a beach, the only survivor of a shipwreck. Suggested by Sara Duff, Acquisitions & Collections

The Hate U Give by Angie Thomas Sixteen-year-old Starr Carter moves between two worlds: the poor neighborhood where she lives and the fancy suburban prep school she attends. The uneasy balance between these worlds is shattered when Starr witnesses the fatal shooting of her childhood best friend Khalil at the hands of a police officer. Khalil was unarmed. Soon afterward, his death is a national headline. Some are calling him a thug, maybe even a drug dealer and a gangbanger. Protesters are taking to the streets in Khalil's name. Some cops and the local drug lord try to intimidate Starr and her family. What everyone wants to know is: what really went down that night? And the only person alive who can answer that is Starr. But what Starr does or does not say could upend her community. It could also endanger her life. Suggested by Andrew Hackler, Circulation

The Inclusion Breakthrough: unleashing the real power of diversity by Frederick A. Miller & Judith H. Katz The Inclusion Breakthrough cuts a path through this potential minefield, offering a proven methodology for strategic organizational change, including models for diagnosing, planning, and implementing inclusion-focused, culture-change strategies tailored to each organization's individual needs. It also describes the key competencies for leading and sustaining a culture of inclusion. Offering real-world results of ''before and after'' surveys, including anecdotal and statistical reports of organizational change achieved using the methodologies described, Suggested by Sandy Avila, Subject Librarian

The Interrogation of Ashala Wolf by Ambelin Kwaymullina Taking refuge among other teens who are in hiding from a government threatened by their supernatural powers, Ashala covertly practices her abilities only to be captured and interrogated for information about the location of her friends. Suggested by Sara Duff, Acquisitions & Collections

The Rest of Us Just Live Here by Patrick Ness What if you aren't the Chosen One? The one who's supposed to fight the zombies, or the soul-eating ghosts, or whatever the heck this new thing is, with the blue lights and the death? What if you're like Mikey? Who just wants to graduate and go to prom and maybe finally work up the courage to ask Henna out before someone goes and blows up the high school. Again. Because sometimes there are problems bigger than this week's end of the world, and sometimes you just have to find the extraordinary in your ordinary life. Even if your best friend is worshiped by mountain lions. Suggested by Christina Wray, Digital Learning & Engagement Librarian

What if?: short stories to spark diversity dialogue by Steve L. Robbins Hiring and retaining the best and brightest talent is what defines market leadership today. And in the global marketplace winning the war for talent means embracing differences, discovering other worldviews, and reframing our organizations for competitive advantage. What If? delivers a creative and innovative way to explore the issues that dominate today's multicultural workplace: leadership and mentoring, creativity and innovation, organizational culture and engagement. In 25 inspiring stories-some deeply personal-Steve Robbins offers fresh insight into the real and meaningful differences among people and how the power of everyday experiences can be the catalyst for seeing the world through a different lens. What If? also presents specific ideas of what organizations can do toengage our global world, build core competencies in diversity and inclusion, and benefit from the best talent available - regardless of age, gender, ethnicity, religion, race, or disability. Suggested by Sandy Avila, Subject Librarian

What We Left Behind by Robin Talley From the critically acclaimed author of Lies We Tell Ourselves comes an emotional, empowering story of what happens when love may not be enough to conquer all. Toni and Gretchen are the couple everyone envied in high school. They've been together forever. They never fight. They’re deeply, hopelessly in love. When they separate for their first year at college—Toni to Harvard and Gretchen to NYU—they’re sure they’ll be fine. Where other long-distance relationships have fallen apart, theirs is bound to stay rock-solid. The reality of being apart, though, is very different than they expected. Toni, who identifies as genderqueer, meets a group of transgender upperclassmen and immediately finds a sense of belonging that has always been missing, but Gretchen struggles to remember who she is outside their relationship. Suggested by Cindy Dancel, Research & Information Services

Whistling Vivaldi: and other clues to how stereotypes affect us by Claude M. Steele In this work, the author, a social psychologist, addresses one of the most perplexing social issues of our time: the trend of minority underperformance in higher education. With strong evidence showing that the problem involves more than weaker skills, he explores other explanations. Here he presents an insider's look at his research and details his groundbreaking findings on stereotypes and identity, findings that will deeply alter the way we think about ourselves, our abilities, and our relationships with each other. What he discovers is that this experience of "stereotype threat" can profoundly affect our functioning: undermining our performance, causing emotional and physiological reactions, and affecting our career and relationship choices. But because these threats, though little recognized, are near-daily and life-shaping for all of us, the shared experience of them can help bring Americans closer together. In a time of renewed discourse about race and class, this work offers insight into how we form our sense of self, and lays out a plan that will both reduce the negative effects of "stereotype threat" and begin reshaping American identities Suggested by Sara Duff, Acquisitions & Collections

Women and Leadership: transforming visions and diverse voices edited by Jean Lau Chin Over the past thirty years the number of women assuming leadership roles has grown dramatically. This original and important book identifies the challenges faced by women in positions of leadership, and discusses the intersection between theories of leadership and feminism. Suggested by Megan Haught, Teaching & Engagement/Research & Information Services

You're Welcome, Universe by Whitney Gardner When Julia finds a slur about her best friend scrawled across the back of the Kingston School for the Deaf, she covers it up with a beautiful (albeit illegal) graffiti mural. Her supposed best friend snitches, the principal expels her, and her two mothers set Julia up with a one-way ticket to a "mainstream" school in the suburbs, where she's treated like an outcast as the only deaf student. The last thing she has left is her art, and not even Banksy himself could convince her to give that up. Out in the 'burbs, Julia paints anywhere she can, eager to claim some turf of her own. But Julia soon learns that she might not be the only vandal in town. Someone is adding to her tags, making them better, showing offand showing Julia up in the process. She expected her art might get painted over by cops. But she never imagined getting dragged into a full-blown graffiti war. Suggested by Emma Gisclair, Curriculum Materials Center

#ucf libraries bookshelf #ucf library #featured bookshelf #diverse voices #representation matters

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