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(Left to right) Me, having just made a really bad pun vs. everyone else in my vicinity.
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What did the cat say when it was asked to describe itself in two words in an interview?
Me Aww
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Strippers fucking their wet holes PT 2
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The Ways You Look
Blake: Hey, Jaune… What do you think of my outfit; Do you think it’s a little… much?
Jaune: …
Jaune: Well… First off it looks tearable.
Blake: It looks bad?!
Jaune: No, I said tearable as in: ‘Able to be torn.’
Blake: W-What are you talking about?
Jaune: I want to rip it to shreds.
Blake: What?! Why do you want to do that?
Jaune: Because it also makes you look breedable.
Blake: What?!
Jaune: Highly breedable.
Blake: …?!
Jaune: …
Blake: …
Blake: H-How breedable…?
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Choose Online non tearable album
Quality non tearable album and custom image posters from Gee7 are a stylish way to decorate your home. We offer softcover albums and custom designed posters.
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🍳 Let's eat!! 🍳
The preorders for Niki's Cookbook are now open!!
They will be closing in a month, on March 12~
🍨 https://escookbook.bigcartel.com/
(bundle info underneath!!)
🥚 For big eaters, here's the full bundle!
Comes with:
Physical zine
5 prints
2 sticker sheets
Charm
Notepad
Coaster
Stencil
All digital content, early birds + stretch goals!
🌭 Don't need the physical zine but want the merch?
Then the pdf + merch bundle is just for you!
Comes with:
5 prints
2 sticker sheets
Charm
Notepad
Coaster
Stencil
All digital content, early birds + stretch goals!
🍰 For both the full and pdf + merch bundles, we have an option to "bloom" them for sticker enthusiasts!
Blooming these bundles for an extra $6 doubles the number of sticker sheets and stickers you get! Stick them everywhere!!
🥐 Spin the wheel with our gacha bundle!
Comes with:
Physical zine
3 RANDOM prints
1 Charm
1 Notepad
1 Acrylic coaster OR stencil
Ticket early bird ONLY
All digital content + stretch goals
🍜 Only want the book? Here's the book-only bundle!
Comes with:
Physical zine
Ticket early bird ONLY
All digital content + stretch goals
🍔 And finally, the digital bundle!
Comes with all digital content:
Digital zine (B5, ~100 pages, 20 recipes)
Printable charts and recipe cards
Digital stretch goals
🍴 For early tasters, we have the early birds!
There are only limited quantities, so act fast if you want them! On the menu is a cute tearable ticket made by AL and a boba tea holder made by sana!
🍡 We've got pages of delicious art, writing, and recipes!
Be sure to keep a look out for our contributors posting their previews for sneak peeks, as well as keep an eye on this account for all updates!
We hope you enjoy the meal that everyone worked so hard on, let's eat!
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life advice because i'm drinking a can of monster (and making it everyone's problem)
ALRIGHT HELLO MAGGOTS I PROCURED A TWIRLY STRAW AND I'M DRINKING A CAN OF MONSTER WAIT I JUST SAID THAT OH WELL TOO BAD. @littlewoggysaffle and @empressumbreon, my lovely children, and @robinprinceofchaos my favourite nephew, listen close for this is TOTALLY LEGIT AND AMAZING ADVICE. OKAY? OKAY.
(I'm listening to a Crowley playlist I made called Loserboy Rizz rn. Feels relevant. Like a disclaimer, sort of, about the tone of this post.)
ALRIGHT FIRST UP YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO TAKE YOUR MEDS REGULARLY AT THE SAME TIME OR THEY DON'T WORK APPARENTLY.
SECOND, MEN'S CARGO TROUSERS ARE A HOLY INVENTION, I CAN FIT MY COPY OF ANANSI BOYS INTO THE POCKET WITH ROOM FOR A WATER BOTTLE LIKE WTF. L TO CROWLEY AND HER WOMEN'S JEANS.
YOU ARE GOING TO ANNOY PEOPLE. IT IS INEVITABLE. YOU WILL ANNOY PEOPLE JUST LIKE THERE ARE PEOPLE WHO ANNOY YOU. AND THAT'S OKAY. IT'S OKAY TO BE ANNOYING SOMETIMES. THE ONES WHO MATTER WILL LOVE YOU ANYWAY. JUST LIKE YOU LOVE THEM.
CONTRARY TO POPULAR BELIEF, IT IS NOT ONLY A WAR CRIME THE SECOND TIME.
STANDARDISED TESTING MEASURES NOTHING OF EITHER INTELLIGENCE OR KNOWLEDGE ABOUT A SUBJECT. IT'S JUST A MEASURE OF HOW WELL YOU CAN TAKE THE EXAM.
IT IS OKAY TO BE A STEREOTYPE. IT IS OKAY TO DEFY THE STEREOTYPE. YOUR LIFE IS NOT SOME KIND OF DIVERSITY REP YOU CAN BE WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU WANT.
BODY COUNT DOES NOT REFER TO MURDER IN MOST SITUATIONS. BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU ACCIDENTALLY REVEAL.
WHEN IN DOUBT, THE DRAMATIC OPTION IS PROBABLY MORE INTERESTING, IF NOT MORE EFFECTIVE. AND HEY LET'S BE INTERESTING OKAY. TO OURSELVES, I MEAN.
UNLESS YOU WANNA BE BASIC WHICH IS FAIR BASICNESS IS A SOCIAL CONSTRUCT ANYWAY. EVEN SCIENCE CAN'T AGREE ON WHAT IS BASIC. DOES IT REFER TO PROTON ACCEPTORS OR ELECTRON PAIR DONORS OR -OH ANION DONORS OR WHAT? THEY DON'T AGREE. SO BE BASIC OR WHATEVER YOU WANT. YOU ARE AWESOME.
HUMAN BLOOD DOES NOT MAKE GOOD PAINT. THIS IS FROM EXPERIENCE. DON'T BOTHER TRYING.
IF YOU NEED TO TEAR OPEN THE MEMBRANES SURROUNDING A HUMAN BRAIN, JUST USE A SHARP OBJECT AND CUT THE DURA MATER. IT LOOKS TEARABLE, BUT TRUST ME, I'VE PLAYED TUG OF WAR WITH IT AND IT DOES NOT TEAR.
YOU ARE WORTH MORE THAN YOUR "PRODUCTIVE" OUTPUT AND THE AMOUNT OF CASH YOU PUMP INTO AND OUT OF THIS FAILING ECONOMY.
I LOVE YOU. THAT YOU CAN BE SURE OF.
ALRIGHT *SLURPS MORE MONSTER FROM MY TWIRLY STRAW*
I'M OFF TO CAUSE MORE CHAOS, STAY AFRAID, MAGGOTS, FOR I WILL RETURN XOXO UWU
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Explore the diverse applications of Cosmos Synthetic Paper, ranging from printing and packaging to tags, labels, and beyond. Learn how our durable, high-quality synthetic paper can enhance your projects and bring your creative visions to life.
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