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blackcatkita · 4 years

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264 Days

A Storyscape: Titanic fanfic

Pairing- Charlie x Adele

Word Count- 3994

A/N- I have no business writing this but here we are.

Possible trigger warnings- Emotional trauma, loss, alcoholism and survivor’s guilt.

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January 3, 1913

Hileni ignored me when I told her we weren’t exchanging Christmas gifts and bought me this journal. I can’t scold her for it, I did get her a cat and I know she’s only trying to help. I think she thinks if I have somewhere to write my thoughts I’ll be able to move on; stop “avoiding life” as she puts it. But where do I even begin?

It’s been 264 days.

There are times I feel fine, more like myself, or how I used to be. I try to keep busy, working some fill-in hours at the shop and full time at my new job. It’s rewarding work, at an organization developed to aid survivors and immigrants find employment, housing, food… I’ve only been there for 6 weeks. I hope I’m making a difference, even if it is small.

Some days I can’t believe almost 9 months have passed. The nights are the worst when Hileni has gone to bed and it’s quiet. I will shut my eyes and be back there; watching the stern dive into the water, panicked faces all around me, hear screams or the notes of ‘Nearer My God to Thee’ drifting through the open window. Reminders come during the day as well. For just a few seconds the floor will seem to pitch, the air turns cold against my skin and I can feel the frigid water around my ankles. But the nights… the nights are the worst.

Still, I count myself lucky. I’m alive. Hileni is alive. Zetta, Matteo, Lena, Sabine, heck, even James that bastard, they’re alive. And Charlie… Charlie is alive. By some miracle, everyone I care about survived the tragedy but there were so many that didn’t. So, so, many…

I know I mustn’t dwell on the lost. We have to live our lives. We have to move forward. Though some of us are doing better than others.

Zetta wasn’t kidding when she said if she stopped she would start thinking. She went from the release party straight to filming her next project. I’ve received a few letters from her, asking how I am and gushing about Richard and the wedding. It seems she has some affection for her fiancé after all and not a moment too soon. The wedding is but two weeks away and I’m excited to go, it will be nice to see everyone together again.

Matteo has been wonderful. He took a job as head concierge at a high-end hotel downtown and it suits him. He seems happier than he was working for James. The hotel keeps him busy but he visits when he can and insists on getting me out of the house. We go to dinner, often with Hileni but sometimes not. He helped us find the two-bedroom flat we’re currently living in; made possible by $500 in an anonymous envelope addressed to me that was left at our old place. I’m sure it was from James, who else would have sent it? I asked Matteo if he knew anything about it and he claimed he didn’t but he averted his gaze and shifted his feet like he does when he’s hiding something. I would bet it was him who slipped it under our door.

He wants more from me. He said as much. Told me he would be waiting if I ever decided to give us a chance. I wish he wouldn’t. He needs to find someone who will love him the way he deserves to be loved and that someone isn’t me. It would be easier if it was but my heart belongs to someone else.

My love. My Charlie.

Charlie… my heart aches when I’m near him and it aches when I’m away from him. Many would say I did the wrong thing that night in the boiler room. He decided to stay behind, to sacrifice himself and I took it away from him. I fully admit it was a selfish thing to do but because of what I did his sisters still have a brother, his mother still has a son. I won’t apologize for that. I won’t apologize for saving his life. Is that what he needs to hear?

Almost two weeks passed after we talked at Zetta’s premiere before I saw him again when he came into the shop to tell me the ship to Southampton he meant to steward on left the night before. He was packed and ready but when it came time to embark he couldn’t make himself get on. I asked if he was afraid and he said no, there wasn’t any rush, he was making good money and another ship was leaving in a few weeks. When he didn’t get on the next one, he said there must be something keeping him in America after all.

I allowed the hope I felt at the premiere to grow and since then we’ve been spending more and more time together. Often he’s there to walk me home after work, taking detours through the park or stopping for ice cream. We go to the pictures and he’s over for dinner at least twice a week, staying to talk for hours after Hileni goes to her room. There’s been glimpses of how we used to be, an affectionate look, fleeting touches, his hand in mine or a kiss on my cheek, yet he still holds himself back. Gone is the Charlie I fell in love with. The man with the sparkling eyes and warm smile that could light up the world. He’s broken, and I’m the one responsible.

He’s drinking too much, haunted by those we left behind. Several times he’s come here late at night, so drunk he can barely stand and saying the things I long to hear from him sober. I make up the couch and sit with him until he falls asleep and in the morning he’s gone, leaving behind a thank you note apologizing for the night before. Just once, I wish he’d stay. Then I would know he…

A knock on the flat’s door startles me and my pen falls from my fingers, rolling across the desk and coming to a stop at the base of the lighted lamp. I glance out my bedroom window and am surprised to see how high the moon is in the darkened sky. It’s later than I realized. The knock sounds again, louder this time. Given the hour, it has to be Charlie. The knowledge of it makes my stomach flutter and my heart race. Quickly, I stand and slip into my robe, carefully making my way through the unlit parlor before the noise wakes Hileni.

Another knock sounds as I slide the bolt and open the door. The reprimand I intended to give dies on my lips as I take in the two men standing in front of me; Matteo, face pinched in an annoyed expression, half holding up a grinning Charlie. A sigh escapes me as I step to the side, opening the door wider to let them in. “Help him to the couch please, Matteo.”

“I’m fine. I can walk by myself.” Charlie pulls away from Matteo, stumbling into me as he crosses the threshold. “Whoa there,” he chuckles as I steady him with my hands on his waist. Looking into my eyes, his expression changes into something wistful. “My beautiful girl… My Adal…” He reaches up with both hands, one cupping my cheek and the other playing with a tendril of my long hair. “Your hair is down. I love when your hair is down.”

“Aren’t you on the make tonight.” Gently, I take his hand from my cheek, loop my arm around his waist and begin leading him to the sofa. “Come on, you, sit down before you fall down.”

Charlie scoffs but doesn’t otherwise argue, leaning heavily on me as Matteo shuts the door and follows us in. I stumble, nearly pulled down with Charlie as he collapses onto the sofa with a heavy sigh, as though sitting lifted some of the weight from his shoulders.

Matteo turns on the lamp beside us as I stand, then looks at me, brow furrowed only slightly. “Some tea, perhaps?”

I nod, recognizing from his expression the question is not about tea but wanting to speak to me privately. Walking into the kitchen, I turn the light switch on the wall before hurrying to fill the kettle. Ignoring the heat of Matteo’s gaze on my back from where he stands in the doorway, I set the kettle on the stove and crouch down, lighting a match to ignite the wood inside.

“How long are you going to let this continue?”

“As long as it takes,” I answer, blowing out the match and shutting the firebox door. I don’t look at him as I stand and move to the cupboard, mumbling as I take out a tin of tea and three cups. “It’s my fault he’s like this.”

I hear Matteo sigh before he joins me at the counter. “I’m not staying.” Eyes locked on mine, he takes the teacup from my hand, his fingertips lingering against my skin before he puts it back in the cupboard. Clearing his throat, he scoops tea leaves into the two remaining cups. “You have to stop blaming yourself, Adele. You had your reasons for doing what you did.”

“But does he understand that?”

“He does,” Matteo nods. “Your Charlie’s demons…” he pauses, choosing his words. “they aren’t named Adal.”

I blink up at him, surprised to hear him pronounce my given name, the name Charlie calls me. I open my mouth to speak but the sound of water boiling draws my attention and I take the kettle from the stovetop, turning back to fill the cups. “How did you end up with him anyway?” I ask Matteo while I pour, returning the pot to the stove as he answers.

“He was waiting outside the hotel when I got off my shift, demanding to know what was going on between you and me.”

“He what?” Panic rises in me as I worry over why Charlie would think Matteo was anything more than a dear friend. As far as I am aware, I have never given him cause to think otherwise, but Matteo tends to resort to sass when challenged. “What did you tell him?”

There’s a sadness in his eyes as he answers, “That he is a fool who could have everything if he only saw what was right in front of him.” Closing his eyes, he lets out a slow breath and shakes his head. “I… I have to go. Goodnight, Adele.” With those words he strides out of the kitchen, leaving me speechless as I watch him walk away.

The opening and closing of the front door shakes me from my stupor and I turn off the light before taking our tea into the parlor. Hileni stands before me, looking at the door in confusion. “Oh, I didn’t realize you were up.”

“Is Matteo okay?” she asks, glancing between myself and Charlie where he sits on our sofa, head leaning against the back with his eyes closed. “He didn’t say a word, only nodded at me and left.”

I shrug in response.

“I brought Charlie’s bedding out.” Hileni continues, gesturing at a blanket and pillow on the armchair.

Feeling a pang in my chest, I step forward to place the cups on the coffee table so she can’t see my expression. Charlie has come here in this condition enough times she thinks of our extra bedding as his. My little sister shouldn’t have to deal with it but I can’t turn him away. “Thank you, habibti. I’m sorry for waking you up. For… all of this. I’m sorry.”

She shrugs. “It’s Charlie. It’s fine, really.” Her lips twitch in a sad excuse for a smile before she heads back to her room, turning to look at me with a smirk on her face and her hand on the door. “Try not to keep me up, though.”

Shaking my head, I look up at the ceiling and fight back a smile. One of these days I’m going to remember how grown up and bold she’s become. “Go to bed!” I don’t even finish the sentence before she closes the door, giggling.

Letting out a sigh, I pick up the pillow and give it a fluff before slipping it between Charlie and the arm of the sofa. He doesn’t stir as I sit, facing him with my legs tucked beneath me and for a moment I watch his broad chest rise and fall with slow, steady breaths. My eyes trail up to his face, noting the differences between the man I met and the man before me now. In waking hours he looks tormented, older than his twenty-five years. His cheeks hollowed from weight loss, his eyes, dull and tired and a visible furrow between his brows more often than not. But in his sleep, he looks young again, peaceful and untroubled, more like the man he used to be. His hair has come loose from his usual smart style and I reach out, unable to stop myself from brushing it off his forehead.

A low hum of satisfaction sounds when my fingers caress his skin and with his eyes closed, he takes my hand, bringing it to his lips to press a gentle kiss to the back of it.

“Lie down, Charlie. You’ll get a neck ache if you sleep like that.”

“I’m not sleeping.” He drops our joined hands between us and turns to look at me, his glazed eyes pleading as he looks into mine. “Sit with me. Just for a little while. Please.”

“Alright, just for a little while,” I agree. “I made tea but if you’re hungry I can get you something to eat.”

“Always taking care of me…” His lips slowly curl into a soft smile as he shakes his head. “I’m not hungry but, thank you.” The joy in his eyes is brief and slips away as he studies my face, replaced with something I can’t identify. Is it sadness? Longing? Desire? My breath catches in my lungs as he leans forward, brushing his fingertips across my cheek to stop me from turning away. His gaze drops to where he’s trailing his thumb across my bottom lip and when he speaks, his voice is thick with want. “Can I kiss you?”

I should say no. I should tell him he’s drunk and not thinking clearly. I should protect my heart. But as his warm brown eyes meet mine I know there is no protecting it, for it belongs to him. How I’ve longed to feel his soft lips upon mine again, to feel his heart beating in his chest as he held me in his arms, safe and warm. I should say no… I should say no, but my voice is breathless when I tell him, “Yes.”

His other hand comes up, joining the first to frame my face. He leans in further still, tilting his head as our eyes slide shut. The kiss is soft and hesitant, almost reverent as his lips brush against mine. He draws in a shaky breath, my name a whisper against my lips as he threads his fingers through my hair and cups the back of my neck. Wrapping an arm around my waist to pull me tighter to him, his lips part, groaning into my mouth as our tongues meet.

“Charlie,” I moan, looping my arms around his neck, both of us poring every ounce of heartache we’ve felt into the kiss until it turns desperate. “I love you.” His hands shake as he loosens his grip and breaks the kiss, pulling away only far enough to rest his forehead on mine. “I love you,” I tell him again, pressing another kiss to his trembling lips. His breath turns ragged and as I tell him I love him one more time, I’m not sure if the moisture on my cheeks is his or mine.

“I…” his voice hitches and he doesn’t move, doesn’t speak. I pull back, opening my eyes to find him already watching me with tears running down his face. “Adal, I…” The look he gives me is full of pain, his expression one of sadness and desperation, but also love. Even if he can’t say the words the eyes don’t lie. He may be lost, he may need more time, but he loves me, and he’s never stopped.

“Shh… I know, it’s okay.” Tears of my own fall as I kiss and brush his away but they don’t stop and I gather him into my arms instead. Sliding his arms around my waist, he buries his face in the crook of my neck and begins to sob, clinging to me like I’m the very air he needs to breathe. “It’s okay, Charlie. Everything’s going to be okay.” I reassure him over and over, rubbing his back as the sobs wrack his body.

I don’t know how much time has passed when Charlie finally pulls away and sits forward, sniffling as he drags his forearm across his cheeks. He stares straight ahead, at a window reflecting the room around us then turns to look at me. Our eyes lock and he quickly looks away, picking up his cup of tea and taking three large gulps before setting it back down.

“We should get some sleep,” I tell him, using the cuff of my robe to dry my eyes. He nods silently in response, bending down to take off his shoes as I stand to get the blanket from the chair. Stretching out on his back, he closes his eyes as I cover him. “Charlie… you can’t keep doing this to yourself. Drinking this much… it isn’t you.”

There is no joy in the laugh he huffs out. “I don’t know what ‘me’ means anymore.”

I don’t respond. How can I when I wonder the same thing about myself? I bend down to kiss his cheek and he turns his head at the last second, making my lips press against his. The kiss is chaste, nothing more than a quick peck but my heart flutters none the less. Still not knowing what to say, I place another kiss to his forehead before turning off the lamp and heading to my room, only making it a few feet when I hear him speak.

“We left them behind… all those people.” His voice is quiet in the darkness. I can barely make out his profile from the moonlight shining through the window, laying there with his arm draped across his eyes. “John, the rest of the crew, the families in steerage… men, women, children, people that had families waiting for them… I knew them, Adal, and we left them behind.”

“I know, Charlie.” My throat tightens but my eyes stay dry. I don’t think I have any tears left. “But we lived… we lived.”

His breathing deepens so quickly I wonder if he even heard me, like his confession used the last of his energy and I slip quietly into my room. I take off my robe, sling it over the chair at my desk and turn off the lamp before crawling under the covers. Emotionally and physically exhausted, I begin drifting off to sleep as soon as my head hits the pillow, the feel of Charlies kiss still tingling on my lips.

I wake as the sun hits my face and slowly open my swollen eyes, turning away from the harsh glare coming through the window. I feel as though I hardly slept at all and goodness, I’m thirsty. And hungry, I realize as the scent of bacon hits my nose. Stretching my arms above my head, I let out a deep, satisfying yawn and swing my feet to the floor. I tie my hair back with a ribbon from the nightstand and get up, dreading what is waiting for me on the other side of the door. The couch will be empty, the blanket and pillow stacked neatly on the chair with a note on top; and Hileni in the kitchen, making me breakfast in an attempt to cheer me up while giving me sympathetic looks and asking questions I don’t have the answers to. It’s always the same but I can’t hide in here forever.

Taking a deep breath I walk into the parlor and my eyes automatically look to the couch, hoping that maybe, just maybe, he’d still be there. He isn’t, and neither is the bedding he used last night. Hileni’s large male cat, Earl Grey, aptly named for his color and his love of the beverage is happily slurping up the remains of our tea. He looks up at me with his big blue eyes, tongue running along his mouth to get every last drop. “Shoo,” I scold, waving my hand. He ignores me, dipping his face back into the cup and I step forward to coax him off the table. “Shoo, you beast!”

Hileni’s laughter floats out of the kitchen and I wonder she’s talking to when I hear her say, “You’re doing it all wrong! You’re going to burn it like that!”

Then I hear him laugh, and my heart stops beating.

“If you’ll remember I was the one who put together a picnic for you and your cabinmates, Hileni, I’ve got this.”

“Oh, please,” Hileni snorts. “You didn’t cook any of that. You stole it from the kitchens.”

“Well, that is true,” he laughs again, untroubled and carefree. “But I do know how to cook bacon so let me work.”

I’m dreaming, I must be. Rooted to the spot, I turn to look into my bedroom, convinced I’ll see myself still sleeping but all I see is the bed I have yet to make. I pinch myself. Nothing happens, though I’m not sure what the act is supposed to accomplish either way. Finally convinced I am awake and Charlie is here, butterflies take flight in my stomach. I take a deep breath to calm my racing heart and blink back the happy tears that have sprung in my eyes as I enter the kitchen. “What’s all this?” I ask, taking in the room. Hileni is by the pantry, reaching for something on her tip-toes and Charlie stands at the stove, transferring bacon from a cast iron skillet to a plate, like this is an everyday occurrence.

He turns at the sound of my voice and the smile he gives me lights up the room. “Damn, it was supposed to be breakfast in bed.”

“I told you bacon would get her up.” Rolling her eyes, Hileni sets a jar of maple syrup on the table. “He doesn’t listen that one.”

“I’ll remember it for next time,” Charlie chuckles, adding the plate of bacon to the table. With a gentle hand on my lower back, he pulls out a chair for me. “Sit, Adal, it’ll be ready in just a minute.”

Through narrowed eyes I watch the picture of domesticity taking place around me; Hileni bringing milk and coffee to the table, Charlie taking pancakes out of the oven where they were being kept warm. I pinch myself again, and when Hileni asks what I’m doing I tell her nothing, which only makes her laugh as she sits down and gives me a knowing look.

As happy as I am he stayed, a sliver of doubt remains this side of him won’t last. Reality will set in and he will hold me at arms-length once again. Then our eyes meet across the table and I see the familiar gleam I haven’t seen since the night of Zetta’s birthday party. The night we kissed under the stars before our world was turned upside down and I know what I said last night is true- Everything’s going to be okay.

#storyscape titanic #storyscape titanic fanfic #storyscape titanic fanfiction #charlie x adele #charlie x adal #charlie stoke #adele carrem

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luminouslumity · 5 years

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Aftermath

Never a day goes by where I don't think of Charlie Stoke. But it's not out of grief; no, he wouldn't have wanted me to be sad for long. Instead, I think of all the happy moments we had together—our party with Hileni, our first kiss... I even did my best to make sure the corsage he gave me stayed fresh for as long as possible, and his jacket is still with me. But despite this—despite having been several years now—I sometimes wish I could've found a way to save him, maybe even knocking him out with a shovel and dragging him onto a boat.

He probably would've resented me for it. And who was I to deny him his wish? He died a hero, and that gives me a bittersweet sort of comfort. To thank him, I've made sure that his story has been told. His and all the stokers who died making sure those on the ship had a chance to escape. The people deserve to know that their deaths were not in vain.

But besides that, I've done my best to move on with my life. We have been married for a long time now, Matteo and I, and I don't regret a single moment of it. I love him just as much as I loved Charlie, though it took me some time to realize this. We found comfort in each other after he came to live with Hileni and me, and he eventually asked me to marry him five years later. I didn't give him an answer then, only told him I would think about it.

And then America entered the Great War.

My sister and I soon took jobs as nurses, while Matteo was in the army. We said our goodbyes before he left and he promised to come back to me; it was only as the train was leaving did I feel an ache I had hoped to feel only once.

I suppose absence truly does make the heart grow fonder. And though I will never forget Charlie, I know he would've wanted me to be happy.

Thankfully the war ended a year later and Matteo kept his promise. But I could see his time in the trenches had changed him. And so, just as he was there for me, I decided to return the favor and be there for him, listening to his stories of the war, his nightmares... But we managed, and any discussion of a potential marriage didn't come up again until 1920, when the women's vote was finally ratified. We had gone out to celebrate that night, and in my excitement, I asked him to marry me.

Unconventional perhaps, but when have I ever been one to follow tradition? He accepted of course, and our wedding was a year later. We invited only a few friends and family, and even Zetta made some time to attend. It's from her I learned that James died in battle, and though I felt no great loss over his passing, I gave my condolences anyway.

Matteo and I had our first child not long after. We wanted our son to be brave and kind, so we named him after his great grandfather and Charlie to reflect that. His sister Zetta was born two years later.

Now, several decades afterwards, our love is still strong. My children now have children of their own, and I still get involved in politics with supporting the oppressed. Matteo supports me as best he can and even joins me in some of the protests. I like to believe that him initially being forbidden from getting on a lifeboat sparked something within him, or perhaps it was simply being tired of facing years of injustice in general. Whatever the case, I'm grateful.

As for the Titanic herself, she seems nothing more but a distant memory for the most part these days. Now, I'd be lying if I said I sometimes couldn't wait to see Charlie again if an afterlife truly does exist, but the thought always goes away as quickly as it comes. I have my own life, and besides, I know he's never truly gone; I see him in my children and grandchildren, in every kind face I encounter... I've even been in contact with his sister a few times, and she's every bit as wonderful as he was.

My time on the ill-fated ship taught me to value love and life, and that's exactly what I intend to do until my dying days. And I think I have a certain steward to thank for that.

#storyscape #titanic #adele x charlie #adele x matteo #adele carrem #matteo vasari #charlie stoke #fanfiction #my writing

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tobeundeniable · 5 years

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Undeniable

Every day, he dresses smartly and walks with what passes for purpose to the office, where it’s numbers and balances all day long. He manages the accounts of the fabulously wealthy and while he knows it’s just another form of servitude--of serving the haves rather than the have-nots like himself--it is enough. For now.

Sometimes he contemplates drinking himself half-blind, especially when he is alone in his small, stagnant apartment in East Harlem, where the laughter and cooking smells and snippets of Italian hit just a little too close to home. But he remembers. He remembers too much and too little all at once, enough to drive any man mad.

He is maintaining.

He has a plan.

His plan is this: he will scrimp and save and live in his shabby little apartment for perhaps two years more, and then he will Be Somebody. This is all he has ever wanted, stretching all the way back to Cairo and the scrapping and the longing.

He remembers his first days in London, where he hid himself under layers of impeccably tailored clothing, white gloves to hide his skin.

And his skin! It is not so much an issue now, where he is surrounded by his kind, the “color in the room.” But he remembers the earliest days, when he barely spoke English and his accent--now carefully cultivated--betrayed him at every turn. He remembers being fourteen and scrubbing viciously at his arms, his chest, his traitorous legs in hopes that paler skin would emerge. Clean. Pure. White.

He had lovers, oh yes, a long string of them. Even now, he can remember their faces, their names. But none like her.

It has been four months since he saw her. He is dismayed to find that the sound of her voice is rapidly fading.

What he does remember comes in flashes. He remembers her fingertips, her mouth, burning fever-bright against his water-cooled skin. He remembers the rough slide of her bathing costume against his chest. He remembers falling into his employer’s bed, not giving a damn about the warm impressions they left on the sheets and what hell there might be to pay later. (There was none; given James’ fragile, scattered state of mind near the end, he is not surprised.)

He remembers the fierceness in her eyes, the way she looked at him that night in the swimming pool, the salt water stinging their eyes.

An invitation arrives, wax-sealed, stamped, delivered. He is not sure how Zetta (or her handlers, or whomever) found him, but he is not surprised; she was always resourceful, a survivor.

That evening, he dresses himself as neatly and elegantly as always. His fingers barely tremble as he straightens his bow tie. The scent of pomade as he rakes it through his hair takes him straight back to that night, how he could smell it on her as she huddled against him, shivering, as the water threatened to lap over the sides of the lifeboat.

The Carpathia came, and she was gone.

He sees her at the premiere, resplendent in green the color of poison. She kisses him once, lightly. She asks him to move in. He says Perhaps when what he wants to do is drop to his knees before her, bury his face in her gown and ask, Where were you? Where have you been?

He has a plan, but now he has meaning. And for tonight, that’s enough.

#storyscape titanic #matteo vasari #fanfiction #adele carrem #matteo x adele

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justhereforthefanfiction · 4 years

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Undeniably Stoked | Charlie & Matteo fanfic - aka the epic, enemies-to-lovers romance no one asked for.

Welcome to the not-so crack!fic of Charlie & Matteo - the epic, enemies-to-lovers romance of SS Titanic that no one asked for!

Backstory: I made a joke about how Charlie/Matteo would make a great enemies-to-lovers pairing somewhere on Storyscape’s reddit, and now the joke’s on me coz I couldn’t stop thinking about it.

So lo and behold, here is my first fanfic on the most unlikely, but awesome pairing that never existed.

I initially set out to write this as a crack!fic but my brain had other ideas, dammit.

I also love these boys. I don’t care if they aren’t my OTP - this was so much fun to write!

P.S: Apologies for the title. I liked it too much to find a more appropriate one! Also apologies in advance for the formatting and style of the piece. I didn’t have this edited by someone else - this is literally a brain dump.

PSS: Don't write fanfiction when you're half asleep, folks!

Disclaimer: I own nothing. NOTHING! This is a just a bit of fun!

Undeniably Stoked

Genre: Drama/Romance

Pairing: Charlie/Matteo

TW: Character death, Unsinkable sinking ships, misleading happy title is misleading

[Charlie]

I saw you.

Through the lift gate. Towering above her in a descending lift, suit sharply cut, and a smirk as slick as your hair. You were her blackmailer’s valet, her prison warden. You were not to be trusted. But around you, you carried a curious air - a stately presence that you were to be seen and heard. It was clear as day you wanted more, to be known as more.

I quietly marvelled at how quickly you saw me as a threat, at the walls that went up, the cruel humour a mask you hid behind to assert your dominance that I barely registered the insult. Bland? Was that what you were worried about becoming? Invisible?

But what startled me the most, was your desire to get a rise out of me. A sly quip, haughty bright eyes, drawn shoulders and a raised eyebrow. Little did I know that this would later characterise our subsequent exchanges. You sought me out, you always did. Looking, seeking my reaction.

The boy that hid behind his suit. The boy who wanted to belong.

You don’t need a day to get a measure of someone. Sometimes it only takes an hour. Or a moment.

And in that moment I did.

I saw you.

[Matteo]

I heard you.

Making promises you couldn’t keep. Bold in your false confidence and naivety. I know your lot. Promising the world. Promising things will be okay if you worked hard enough. Tried hard enough. The ridiculous notion that a good heart, good work and self-belief will prevail against all odds.

What a childish, dangerous fallacy. And what a childish, dangerous thing to do - to raise her hopes up.

I was like you once. Briefly, before reality set me right. The real world does not work that way. I learned that a long time ago. Good hearts and hard work do not always prevail. Sometimes, life is just unfair and you need to do what you can to survive.

I look at this woman. I know her background, her gumption, her aspirations. But more importantly, I know her chances. And I know what she has to lose.

There is a reason why you believe you can thrive. You still trust the world. The world hasn’t let you down yet.

And I seethe. Your words, your false promises echo long after I leave her side.

‘…Trust me…I won’t let you down…’

I heard you.

[Charlie]

I heard you.

Your complexion, red. Your eyes, skirting. Your hands below the table, cards held in loosely fidgeting hands. You watch the scene unfold between your master and her, quietly. Lump in throat.

Your betrayal was loud and clear.

Only one other person knew about the circumstances and could have told their master.

And I was looking at him.

My blood begins to boil as I see this woman’s life fall apart, her eyes darting between her blackmailer and sister. How could we have gotten it so wrong? Was the prison warden a willing executioner in disguise?

Your eyes connect with mine, and I do not look away. The man clamouring for clout and status is gone. I see a shamefaced boy, and I pause.

This act did not give you pleasure. No smirk in sight, no air of arrogance. I see you, deflated, head hung low, back bent.

Suddenly, I am no longer concerned about what you did, but what it cost you.

And all I hear is silence.

[Matteo]

I see you.

I see what she sees in you. Your steadfast support, unquestionable loyalty in the face of temptation. Your fire. An unnamed emotion grips my chest as I watch how easily you sacrificed your livelihood for your principles.

Foolish boy. I squirm in my seat.

Can’t you see you can’t win?

When he finally leaves, I look at the three of them, and I try. Try to tell them what I know is true. That you can’t win, you have to adapt and survive.

That I didn’t want anyone to get hurt.

My master is the devil, and he owns my soul. But if they were wise, if they listened….

You came toe-to-toe at me, your white uniform reflecting the afternoon sunlight, golden buttons glistening brightly. I watched the fire in your eyes, ablaze with disappointment. You did not back down. The unnamed emotion comes by again, this time striking me in the throat. I belatedly recognise that that emotion is admiration.

I take in the scene before I leave, the door held ajar. I see the unvoiced question in your eyes.

‘What did it cost you?’

A rising tide of emotion overwhelms me. I move my hand, finally letting the door close between us.

[Charlie]

I hear you before I see you.

Your gait and polished, leather shoes always had a certain staccato rhythm that I’ve come to associate with you.

Clack, clack, clack. And a pause.

You’ve finally seen me.

[Matteo]

I see you before I hear you.

The first thing my eyes are drawn to are the gold buttons on your uniform. They don’t shine as brightly as they did against the white.

I feel a plummeting sensation in my stomach, and I hadn’t even set a step beyond the lift gate.

Your face betrays no surprise by my presence, and with the ways things ended between us last time, I would have expected a colder reception.

You meet my gaze with a short nod, and ask me for my floor.

Not a flicker of emotion. You are a fortress.

I look away as you close the gates. My emotions turbulent and roiling as the sea in a storm.

The lift starts to descend.

“For what it’s worth, you have my sincerest apology.”

I watch your face. For a moment, I am worried you hadn’t heard me, but the thought flies out of my head when your eyes meet mine.

“Why did you do it?”

I shake my head. My heart is in my throat.

“I had to.”

“Did he force you to? What kind of hold…”

“No, Charlie…”. You startle at my use of your first name.

“I mean…”. I sigh.

“Just my livelihood.”

The words hang awkwardly in the air. The painful irony of sharing my potential loss of livelihood to a man who has sacrificed his so willingly isn’t lost on me.

Suddenly, it was getting harder to swallow and breathe.

“Hey, I get it”.

I look at you. Gone is the inscrutable expression on your face. Instead, I see your kind eyes. Your earnest expression.

If anything, it made it harder to swallow and breathe properly. I look away.

“I heard you the last time you know. About not just being a Londoner, a Brit.”

Your voice is low and soft. I take a chance and look at you. You refuse to look away.

“I get that my life is not the same as yours. I’ve had better and worse jobs. I’ll be fine.”

Your voice drops. I find myself staring at your gold buttons, waiting for your next words.

“But your world is different. You’re treated differently. We’re not the same.”

You pause, a sad smile pulling at the corners of your lips.

“No one can blame you for needing to survive.”

“For what it’s worth…” you smile as you throw my words back at me, “I don’t”.

“That is why I have to fight, even if no one asked me to take up arms. Everyone deserves to survive.”

I jolt at your words.

“I shouldn’t have said that. You’ve gone above and beyond your duty. Adele is fortunate to have you in her corner.”

The words come tumbling out, unbidden and loose. Your eyes widen at my heartfelt address. I mentally scold myself for my casual delivery but before I can act, your eyes crinkle and lips curve into a beam.

“I’d do it for anyone. Everyone needs someone in their corner.”

The lift comes to a halt but I’ve barely registered we stopped moving. By the time I realise what is happening, I clock your kind smile and eyes. But I can’t breathe properly. My throat is working overtime. What is worse, my eyes are wet and my vision begins to blur.

Without saying a word, you close the lift gates back and we make our ascent to the top floor. You take a step closer to me. I feel your warmth, your steady breaths and calmness. I don’t know how long we stand in companionable silence, but I know one thing.

You’ve finally seen me.

[Charlie]

An unspoken truce and friendship emerges.

I see you several times later that day, my eyes looking to find you on every floor I’ve dropped you off.

And while I haven’t seen the lonely boy behind the suit ever since that morning, I’ve seen glimpses of the man you’ve hidden away. Nods turn into warm smiles. A preference for standing behind me no matter how crowded or empty the lift is. A glance at me behind you whenever you disembark.

Unknowingly, you take up more space in my thoughts as the day goes by. I start to question my newfound fascination with the boy who wore his suit for an armour. Something has changed. Something has cracked and allowed warmth and light to shine through.

The answer comes quickly enough.

The boy has found a place he belongs.

[Matteo]

The party is in full swing. Ladies and gents decked in their finest silks, lace and jewellery have come to celebrate the birthday event, and were dressed to the nines.

Once upon a time I would have revelled in being amongst such company; mingling, and holding many a vacuous conversation about gambling or other various forms of entertainment that was popular with their like.

Now I can’t help but feel it a tedious undertaking.

Tonight is the night, and I am filled with restless energy. I look for James and Adele in the crowd, and nod in their direction when they make eye contact. Out of the corner of my eye, I spot a familiar blue figure with gold buttons. I smile, watching you assist an elderly gentleman across the decks. I am not surprised, you were always one to go above and beyond.

[Charlie]

After assisting Mister Washburn to the right side of the deck, I find myself taken in by the sight of the stars.

I make my way to the railing and stare at the heavens. Looking into the night sky reminds me that all my problems are smaller than they seem. I take a deep breath. I hear a faint but familiar staccato rhythm as the smell of your spicy pomade hits my senses.

“What’s wrong? Didn’t enjoy the party, Matteo?”

You smile at my use of your first name.

“Preferred this party instead.”

I nod. You join me at the railing, hands splayed on either side. A finger taps rhythmically as you stare into the vast darkness. I note that you’re restless, like myself.

“You reckon she’ll be alright?” I let slip.

Your eyes find me in the semi darkness. A pause, and then a handsome smile erupts.

“Either way, we’ll fight. And we’ll take up arms.”

I bark out a laugh. Your smile reaches your eyes. At the same moment, we look at our hands. Our finger tips are a few inches apart.

I’m swept by the sudden urge to grab your hand. And so I do.

“We’ll fight, we’ll take up arms, and we’ll survive.”

[Matteo]

“We’ll fight, we’ll take up arms, and we’ll survive.”

I can’t stop staring at our joined hands. I can scarcely believe it. I can hear my heart pounding fiercely, my face is warm and my ears are filled with white noise.

I blink rapidly as I look at you. A flush spreads across your pale face, but your eyes flash with determination. I feel my hand being squeezed tighter.

“Our relationship has been rather - well - complicated, shall we say?” I start.

“At the very least.” You smile to yourself.

“How do you look back on our exchanges, Charlie?”

You purse your lips. I am unable to look away.

“We haven’t exactly made each other’s lives easier, have we?” a grin blossoms.

I look into your eyes, taking in your long lashes.

“In a short space of time, you have mine.”

I grip your hand back in emphasis.

“I pride myself on my judgement, but it failed me entirely when I met you. I didn’t see you or hear you. I had no idea. I must have been a fool not to see it at once.”

I step closer to you.

“You are utterly extraordinary”.

I look at past you at the horizon, not daring to look at your face as I complete my thoughts.

“I am a cynic, but I hope…must hope, that your feelings are returned.”

I take your hand and raise it to my lips.

“I need to know, if your feelings are the same?”

I finally dare to meet your eyes, and am surprised to see the intensity of your gaze. Before I know what to make of it, I feel your warm palm cup the back of my head and pull me towards your face.

Your lips are soft and pillowy as I knew they would be, and soon I melt into your broad, warm embrace.

[Charlie]

We break apart and try to catch our breaths, as they float away as puffy clouds in the frigid night air.

You straighten up and shoot me a gentle, shy smile.

“Foolish boy”, I say in jest as you give me a surprised smile.

“I think I fell for you the moment I saw you at the gate.”

We stand there smiling at each other like goofballs until we hear the whistles from the crew pierce the night air.

Suddenly, an iceberg emerges on the horizon and in horror we brace for impact.

My heart thuds heavily into the pit of my stomach. I look at you somberly. I can see worry cloud your face.

“Do you think…”, you drift off, unable to finish the sentence.

“I need to be sure.” I say simply.

You nod, unable to hide your concern. You hold both of my hands against your chest.

Swallowing hard, you hold my gaze. I can practically see the thoughts whizzing through your brain. The words are caught in your throat.

“It’s okay. I’ll be back” I smile as assuredly as I can.

You say only one word.

“Hurry”.

[Matteo]

We are in the belly of the beast.

After you left, I dove straight back into the party and found Adele. You found us, and Hileni, and now we are in the unenviable position of arming ourselves for a fighting chance of survival.

I watch you as you plot and plan, helping us find a path that would guarantee our lives. I am quiet, filled with that familiar emotion of admiration. Instead of doom and gloom, I found that there was no other place I’d rather be than right here with this motley crew.

I belonged right here in the thick of it, by your side.

As if hearing my thoughts, you turn around and smile at me as the girls climb past their way into the engine room.

“How are you doing?” you ask.

“Never better”. I make a quick grab of your hand and squeeze it tightly.

Suddenly cries erupt from a boiler room adjacent to ours. Trimmers rush in, with harried cries to close the door behind them.

With a quick squeeze in apology, you release my hand to head down to those men.

The worse case scenario emerges. Our path ahead has fallen.

[Charlie]

I look back at the three shiny faces that depend on me, and take a breath.

Time is ticking away, the ship is about to sink, and I have to help us escape. As I start going through my options, I can’t help but take in the sights and sounds of the trimmers at work. I look at the Carrems and you, lit aglow by the dancing firelight. My decision has been made.

I beckon you to come with me while I leave the sisters in the boiler room.

We walk into the cavernous air vent and into the spot of moonlight, its rays casting shadows across your solemn face. As I walk you through the plan ahead, I feel you withdrawing away from me.

I pause. You raise an eyebrow.

“What’s wrong?” I ask.

You snort inelegantly.

“Were you ever going to tell me?”

I halt.

“Don’t even think about it, you’re coming with us”.

“Please understand. My whole career started here in the boiler room. These are my people. I have to stay.”

“YOU’RE WRONG!”. I’m taken aback by the ferocity of your statement. You grab my face none too gently, forcing me to look at you in the eye.

“You are my people. We -“. Your voice breaks, tears tracking down your face. You close your eyes in anguish. My heart dies a little.

“Adele, Hileni and I are your people.”

You grab me by the shoulders and hold me close.

“Stay with me.”

I look at the man in front of me, and I know he will be okay. He has found his people, and learned to open his heart. Gone is the boy who used his suit as an armour against the world. He has finally learnt how to belong and love.

“You will be alright, Matteo - ”

You look up at me with a flash of anger.

“Your stupid, stupid promises. Stop making promises you can’t keep.”

I can’t prevent the chasm, the wound or the world of hurt on your face. But I can’t afford to lose my resolve, and pray for strength.

“Please listen -“ I cut you off before you can interrupt. “I cannot walk away. That is not who I am.”

This stills you. You give a pained laugh, shake your head and finally look at me; an upturned corner of your lip through the tears.

“You were always one to go above and beyond, you foolish boy.”

The words don’t sting. But your tortured face? I couldn’t decide which was more devastating, your anguish or your reluctant resignation.

My face is wet. I give a watery smile back.

“Fight. Survive. And, from time to time, spare an occasional thought for a poor English boy who loved ships. Do that, and I’ll be happy.”

I hold your hand and put it over my heart.

“And stay with your people. They need you.”

[Matteo]

I walk back like a zombie, in a haze of defeat and grief.

All the whilst holding your hand.

Upon seeing our return, the sisters gather around us, Adele being the first to notice our clasped hands.

“What is going on?”

I take a deep breath and look into my beloved’s face. You warily look into my face, assessing my state.

At that moment, I decide to show you I can and will fight for our survival. That you can have this peace of mind.

As calm and removed as I can, I explain to the Carrems that they are to follow me. You graciously take the burden of explaining that you will stay. I know I couldn’t bear it.

The sisters predictably break down in tears. I am a hair’s breadth away from giving in myself, when I feel your hand squeeze mine. Through the hugs and the tearful goodbyes, your eyes are never far from mine.

The floor tilts, we exchange looks.

I take charge, and move the girls along.

As they head towards the vent, I make my way to you as you shrug off your coat.

Instead of urging me to go back, you raise your arms wide open and welcome me in a tight embrace. I grab your face in a kiss full of desperation, hoping it will convey everything you mean to me.

Too soon we break apart. And you say only one word.

“Survive”.

[Matteo]

I look in horror at the ship as it tilts towards the heavens, my heart breaking as I start to see the lights flicker out.

I came onboard this ship wanting to survive and make it in cruel world; hoping to make myself undeniable in reputation, worth, and status in the eyes of those who mattered.

In the end, none of it mattered.

Rich or poor, famous or unknown, it does not matter who you are, or what you own. We all die the same.

A much needed lesson I had to learn from you.

Because it isn’t the personal effects, the wealth, or my social standing I find myself caring about.

It is you.

My beloved, who I know does not have long left.

I watch as the last of the lights flicker out and my stomach bottoms out. Adele clutches my hand tightly. A fresh wave of despair grips my heart.

My beloved, a foolish boy who in a few short moments taught me how to love.

To thrive. To still trust the world. That the world hasn’t let you down yet.

It amazes me at just how quickly you came into my life and changed it.

Because you don’t need a day to make a difference to someone. Sometimes it only takes an hour. Or a moment.

I see and I hear the ship sinking below the waves, taking my beloved from me. But not completely. I silently brand our memories and love into my consciousness - an oath to remember and honour the boy who loved his ships, loved his people, and saw what I truly needed. To belong.

A/N: Sooooo.... things took a pretty melodramatic twist, and all the crack-y, silly humour left the window the more I got into it. Sorry!

Also, my brain did a weird thing with the tenses. Went for a style while I was writing it but now I'm second guessing myself. Either way, I'm always down for some con-crit! Send some my way if its not working for you! I swear I wrote and finished this 7 hours past my bedtime (fanfic>sleep, amirite?), coz this damn plot bunny wouldn't leave me be. Here's hoping it entertained some of you!

Let me know what you think of this pairing! 😂

#so not canon #what a damn shame #Matteo Vasari #charlie stoke #Charlie x Matteo #The things I write #storyscape titanic fanfiction #storyscape titanic #storyscape #crack!ship #enemies-to-lovers #I would play the shit out of this pairing #best enemies-to-lovers on the ship okay

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fate-everlasting · 4 years

Text

Matters of the Heart

This is part three of a three-part alternate-ending fanfiction that revolves around the characters of Adele Carrem, Matteo Vasari, and Charlie Stoke, of Fogbank Entertainment’s Storyscape Titanic novella.

Author’s Note: This story begins in the boiler room, drawing from the diamond scene between Adele and Charlie. Thereafter, the storyline diverges.

Part 1 | Part 2

Part 3: Fate, Everlasting

Climbing the stairs, I trace my fingers over the ornate oak railings, admiring the way the golden light reflects off the wood, my fingertips following the gentle curve of the banister toward the landing. When I reach C Deck, there are more people milling about, though I’m hit by a rush of memories, face to face with the Purser’s office where I composed Zetta’s messages for Richard, and had them sent to the Marconi room via pneumatic tube, a technology that amazes me, even now. I take a deep breath, sighing as I look for Matteo, though he is nowhere in sight. I wonder for a moment if he’s retired to his quarters, or perhaps James’ or Zetta’s, but decide to continue up the staircase to B Deck. I pass several passengers on the staircase, and though we make eye contact, we merely nod in acknowledgement of one another, the haunted looks I see in their eyes likely reflected in my own.

I slow as I reach the B Deck landing, expecting to find Matteo, though my brow furrows when I still don’t see him. For a moment, I feel myself start to panic, wondering if I’ve somehow managed to lose him, unsure of the specifics governing our existence on this version of Titanic, whatever it may be. I quickly dismiss the thought, and looking up, the wrought iron and glass dome overhead seems to glow brighter as I ascend the stairs to A Deck. I see more passengers now, many of whom seem to be coming and going from the Lounge as well as passing through the entry vestibules leading from the promenade on either side. Glancing out toward the promenade, I’m taken aback by the beauty. The entire sky seems to be illuminated in a perpetual sunrise, the water glittering brightly as Titanic glides silently toward its destination, though where this destination lies, and when we are to arrive, remains unknown . I sigh softly, and rounding the corner to start up the stairs, I catch myself admiring the ornate beauty of the ship once more, my hand resting gently alongside the bronze cherub adorning the center newel post at the base of the staircase, my mind reeling at the thought that all of this is now at the bottom of the Atlantic. As my gaze lifts toward the landing, my breath catches when I see Matteo’s tall, elegant form waiting there, though his attentions seem to be focused on his wristwatch, his back to the stairway. Climbing the stairs, I approach his side, the smell of his pomade nearly intoxicating. “Teo?”

He turns, smiling softly, his hazel eyes warm, “Adele. I was starting to wonder if you were going to make it.”

“Of course, I made it,” I return his smile, though the light glinting off his watch grabs my attention. I remember how much it meant to him, a gift from his grandfather who wore it during his service in the Boer War. “Your watch, Teo, is it alright…?”

“Well,” he begins, holding his wrist out to display the watch face, “it always did keep perfect time…” he trails off, with a sadness in his eyes.

“Two-twenty,” I softly read the time from his watch, and upon glancing up at the ornately carved clock on the landing, I realize it shows the same. My heart sinks to the pit of my stomach when I realize the significance – it’s the exact time that Titanic sank. “Matteo, I’m so sorry.”

He carefully replaces his cuff over his watch, and turns to me, gently taking my hands in his. “Sorry for what, Adele?” His expression is one of concern, and as I look into his eyes, I feel myself drawn as deeply into him as I had ever been.

“Your watch was your good luck charm, it means so much to you, and now…” I shake my head sadly, though I’m unable to break away from Matteo’s gaze.

“It still is my good luck charm, just as it was for my grandfather.” He smiles sincerely, his thumbs lightly tracing over the backs of my hands. “I’m here with you. I can’t think of any better luck than that.”

I feel a sharp pang of guilt at his words, and I know I need to tell him about Charlie. While I love Matteo, and care for him deeply, the love that I have for Charlie is something completely different, something I’ve since come to realize. The last thing I want to do is cause him any pain, especially after everything we’d been through, but I fear that it would hurt him more if I instead don’t say anything. Looking into his hazel eyes, I feel tears welling up and filling my own. I take a deep breath, in attempt to steel my nerves before speaking. “Matteo, I need…”

He shakes his head then, his hands gently squeezing mine as he interrupts, “It’s alright, Adele.” I struggle to break his gaze, casting my eyes downward for a moment before looking up at him again, my heart and stomach in knots. He repeats softly, “It’s alright, I already know.”

“You know…?” My heart is racing. I wonder what he means, or how he could possibly know what I needed to tell him.

He nods, his hands not leaving mine as he speaks softly, “It’s Charlie.” A look of sadness clouds his features then, though I see him attempt to will it away as he offers me a comforting smile, which doesn’t quite reach his eyes.

I feel my heart skip a beat at his words, “But, how?” My heart aches at the sadness in his eyes, knowing I’m responsible.

He continues gently caressing my hands as he holds them in his, and takes a slow breath before speaking. “I knew it in the engine room,” he pauses, his eyes closing briefly at the memory. “I kept looking for you, waiting for you. But, even as the water rose, you never came.” His voice is soft and low, his gaze briefly breaking from mine before he looks into my eyes again. “That’s when I knew.”

I’m speechless for a moment, my heart feeling like it’s shattering into a million pieces, the feeling of guilt nearly overwhelming. “Teo, I had no idea…I’m so, so sorry.” I shut my eyes lightly in attempt to stave off the tears that feel sure to come, and when I slowly open them, I find Matteo’s sad gaze still on me. “I didn’t intend to stay behind, I knew you were waiting for me, and I had every intention to follow you to the lifeboats. I promise you; I didn’t lead you down there to face what happened.” I can no longer suppress the tears, now freely streaming down my cheeks. “I love you, Matteo, I always have, but…”

Matteo wordlessly envelops me into a tight embrace, my body shuddering as I cry against his comfortable form. I feel his breath catch in his chest, and then he speaks softly, the raw emotion palpable in his tone, “I know, Adele. And I…” he hesitates before completing his thought, and takes a slow, but shaky breath. “…I put you in an impossible position.”

I look up at him, finding his hazel eyes tear-filled beneath his dark lashes, my heart feeling as though it’s breaking all over again. He continues, “I knew that you and Charlie shared something, and I should have respected that. After all, I was the accomplice to your blackmailer, there shouldn’t have been any question,” he shakes his head sadly. “It may seem unconventional, but ever since I saw you in that prison cell, I hadn’t been able to get you out of my mind. I hope you know - I need to make sure you know - I helped you because I truly wanted to. I truly care for you, Adele; more than I’ve ever cared about anyone. You made me a better man, and helped me to see that the ends don’t always justify the means, and that there can always be another way.”

I remain close to him, our arms still wrapped around one another. “I understand why you did what you did, Teo. James put you in an impossible position, too, and I know you truly care…” I sigh then, my eyes searching his, “But I didn’t make you a better man. You’ve always been a good man, or you wouldn’t have done everything you did for me, or for Hileni.”

Matteo chuckles softly, shaking his head, “I’m many things, my dear. But I’m afraid a good man isn’t one of them.” He pauses, gently running his fingers through my hair, “You did bring out the best in me.”

I break his gaze momentarily, and take a deep breath before looking up at him, attempting to will my tears away when I ask him the question that’s been nagging in my mind. “Teo, if you knew… Why did you come back? Why didn’t you try to save yourself?”

He reaches down, gently taking my hands in his again, “It was a matter of the heart, Adele.” He raises his eyebrow slightly, “Why did you stay behind?”

His question gives me pause, “I’m…I’m not sure. I was ready to leave, I very nearly did, but I went back.” He nods slightly, and I continue, “I just felt as though I couldn’t leave. My mind was screaming at me to go, to save myself. But I couldn’t bring myself to do it. When I went back…” I hesitate, looking at him searchingly, “When I went back, it felt like that was where I was supposed to be.”

“Your heart made its choice, Adele,” Matteo nods gently, “and that’s nothing to apologize for.”

I glance down at my hands in his, and shaking my head slightly, I look back up at him, tears once again stinging my eyes. “It is, though. I stayed, and because of that, you came back, and now…”

“It’s nothing to apologize for,” he reiterates his point, his eyes gazing deeply into my own. “When you didn’t come to the engine room, I knew why you’d stayed, there was no doubt in my mind. It was at that moment that my heart made its choice, and it chose the same as yours – for me to stay.”

I’m speechless for a long moment, silent tears running down my cheeks, before I find my voice. “You chose to stay, even though you knew about Charlie, and knew there’d be no way out? Teo, I…”

He chuckles softly, sadly, gently dabbing my tears away with his handkerchief before replacing it in his pocket, taking my hand in his once more. “Adele, our interactions have never been anything short of complicated, have they?”

I smile slightly through my tears, “I suppose you’re right…But even then…”

Matteo shakes his head, his expression gentle, all the rough edges he’d once had now completely smoothed away. “I meant what I said, Adele. Of any place in the world, in this life, or the next, I’d rather stay with you, no matter the circumstance.”

I feel my breath catch, remembering those exact words when he returned to the boiler room, not knowing at the time that he already knew the truth, even before I’d acknowledged it myself. Looking up at him, I shake my head, “Believe what you will, Teo, but you’re a good man. One of the best I’ve ever known. And, I wouldn’t trade anything that happened between us, I just…” I briefly glance away before returning my gaze to him, “I wish everything hadn’t been so complicated.”

A sad smile tugs at one corner of his mouth, “My dear, that’s but the nature of matters of the heart.” His eyes flicker down to his jade and gold brooch, still pinned to my gown.

Following his glance, I feel another pang of guilt. I gently take my hands from his, and reach up to unpin the brooch, feeling as though I’m no longer deserving. “I’m sorry, Teo. I should give this back to you…”

His hands reach up to cover mine, gently holding them in his once more, and I look up at him. He slowly shakes his head, “It’s yours, Adele. It’s still – and always has been – yours.” I nod wordlessly, tears once again stinging my eyes. Matteo offers a warm smile, though I still discern an underlying sadness in his eyes. “Even if I’d known our voyage would end this way, I’d do it all again. I have no regrets. I followed my heart, and you followed yours. Not everyone has the opportunity to surrender themselves to love, and find solace in whatever the outcome may be. I find solace that I still get to be here with you, and in that you have the good man that you truly deserve.” He pauses for a long moment then, his eyes searching my own, “You should get back to him.”

I’m unable to tear my eyes from his gaze, my emotions in turmoil, though I nod, reminding myself that he was right, my heart had made its choice. “Thank you, Matteo, for everything,” I begin, my voice soft. “For your openness, your kindness, your protection, and most of all, your understanding.” I pause briefly, “I’d do it all again, too.”

He nods, gently squeezing my hands in his, “You needn’t thank me, Adele, nor treat this as though it’s a goodbye. We’ve been through far too much together to go our separate ways now, and someone needs to be here to ensure Charlie treats you the way you deserve.” He raises an eyebrow, a mischievous glint in his eye. I chuckle softly at his comment, comforted and relieved, feeling as though a great weight had been lifted off my shoulders, and off of my heart. He then leans down, closing his eyes as he brings my hand to his lips, kissing the back of it lightly. He lingers there for a moment, and when he raises up and opens his eyes, they’re calm, and far less conflicted than before. “Get back to Charlie, Adele. I’ll catch up with the both of you a bit later.”

He smiles warmly, though a sadness still lingers behind his gaze. I nod, smiling softly, “I look forward to it, Teo.” I notice his gaze then shifts over my shoulder, and he nods his head slightly, before smiling at me once more, turning to head up the stairs to the Boat Deck. I watch him leave, the scent of his pomade fading, all the while my heart is still pounding, and the slightest inkling of doubt still nags in the back of my mind.

I sigh softly, and as I turn to head back down to D Deck, I see Charlie waiting at the base of the staircase, alongside the bronze cherub. Concern is still evident in his features. “Adal, is everything alright?”

I nod, offering him a smile as I slowly descend the stairs, “It is. Well, it is now, anyway. Matteo said he’d rejoin us later.”

Charlie nods at that, and clears his throat slightly, “And, he understands?” No doubt, he is referring to Matteo’s feelings for me, the cause of their contentious interactions from the first day they’d met one another.

“He understands everything, Charlie.” I smile gently, holding my hands out to him as I reach the bottom of the staircase, feeling an undeniable warmth course through my body the moment Charlie takes my hands in his. “There’s only you.”

At my words, his expression softens, and he wraps me in his arms, holding me tightly to him. I settle into his embrace, feeling safe and protected as I look up at him, the golden light shining in through the wrought iron and glass dome above surrounding us in a warm, ethereal glow. He smiles warmly then, his fingertips gently tilting my chin up to him as he leans down, his lips only millimeters from my own. He whispers softly, “And, there’s only you, my Adal.” He leans in then, pressing his lips against mine, and in that instant, the last lingering fragment of doubt in my mind disappeared. I return the kiss passionately, my soul finally feeling at ease. In a change, our kiss isn’t anxious, or hurried, but rather soft, tender, and with a love and an intimacy I hadn’t felt before.

We linger in the kiss for a long moment, and when we slowly part, Charlie smiles warmly, gently tracing his fingertips over my cheek. Looking into his eyes, I feel at peace. While I never could have imagined how the course of my life would change when I accepted my ticket on Titanic, I know that everything I’d done had led me to this moment. And, in this moment, I know beyond any shadow of a doubt, that I’m exactly where I’m meant to be. I return Charlie’s smile, lightly resting my hand over his on my cheek, before leaning up to press my lips to his once more. He returns my kiss gently before breaking it a moment later, and steps back to offer me his arm. Without hesitation, I gently take his arm, and as I settle in against his side, we descend the Grand Staircase, leaving the past behind, and taking our first steps together into eternity.

#titanic #storyscape #storyscape titanic #adele carrem #adal karam #charlie stoke #matteo vasari #zetta serda #james eisler #hileni carrem #adele x charlie #adele x matteo #matteo x adele #charlie x adele #fanfic #fanfiction

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uzukamis · 5 years

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fate - page x mc

SUMMARY. a night of many firsts. some would simply call it ‘love’, but the stars speak of something different.

“THE STARS LOOK PRETTY tonight.” You say in awe, your head tilted back at an uncomfortable angle.

Soft wisps of condensation fell from your parted lips as you exhaled and your [E/C] eyes sparkled with curiosity as they glazed over each and every bright speck in the sky. Page’s breath caught in his throat as he stared at you, his heart thrumming against his chest rapidly. He flushed red, averting his brown eyes to the side before mumbling an incoherent “yeah”.

A frown worked its way onto your face and you turned to look at him, your eyes clouded with worry. Your fingers twitched against his own before they tightened around his hand, forcing him to face you. “What’s the matter?”

Page swallowed hard as he met your gaze. His eyes flickered down to your plump lips before nervously meeting your eyes once more. “It’s nothing,” he gave a tight smile at your disbelieving stare, “promise.”

You gave a small huff and your bottom lip jutted out in a pout. You bumped your shoulder with his own, kicking your legs back and forth over the edge of the roof. You stayed quiet, your eyes flitting over the city beneath you. Page grew anxious at your sudden silence— he hadn’t meant to make you angry with him, he was just. . . nervous.

“Y’know you can tell me anything. . .” You started determinedly before pausing, meeting his eyes with a hopeful gaze, “right?”

Page’s eyes widened and he choked on his spit— that’s what you were quiet about?

“‘C-Course I know that, [MC]!” He exclaimed, squeezing your hand affectionately. His other hand rubbed the nape of his neck in a bashful manner and his legs seemed to kick faster, slamming against the roof loudly. “I’m- I’ve just never been on a date before. That’s all.” He stumbled over his words before they dwindled into a low whisper.

“Hm.” You tapped your chin thoughtfully before unraveling your fingers that were intertwined with his own. Ignoring the look of confusion he shot your way, you pushed yourself up off of the ground and brushed the dirt off of your dress before extending a hand to his sitting form. “Neither have I, so let’s make the best of this one, yeah?”

Page blinked confusedly before slowly grasping your hand. A loud gasp left him as you yanked him up, causing him to stumble over his feet. His taller form collided with your smaller one and he wrapped his arms around your frame in an attempt to steady the both of you. Before any apologies could fumble out of his mouth, you let out a string of giggles. You rested your chin on his chest and stared up at him with a bright smile on your face.

“You should have seen your face!”

Page narrowed his eyes as you snorted and threw your head back once more in a fit of laughter. Despite his short attempt at looking angry, it all faded away as he watched the joy spread across your face. It was something he hadn’t seen in awhile— after all, everyone was busy with guild work and barely had enough free time. It was. . . nice.

“Y’know, you’re starting to act more and more like Violet.”

Page felt you freeze in his grasp. Your sudden lack of movement made his heart skip a beat and his mind began to race into overdrive— had he said something wrong? Had he overstepped?

—but then you turned your head to face him, your hand coming up to cup his cheek. Heat spread from his neck and up towards his cheeks at the sudden motion and you gave him a soft smile— a sharp contrast to the one you held moments prior.

“Maybe she’s rubbing off on me, but. . .” You paused, moving your face closer to his own. “Could Violet do this?”

In one swift motion, your lips had connected with his chapped ones. You stood on the tips of your toes to reach him, and your hand glided through the tangled strands of his blonde hair. His hands moved to settle on your hips, unsure, but sure. It was peaceful, and for a moment, the two of you felt everything wash away— the garden, the guild, everything. For just a second, it was only the two of you, sharing a kiss under the sparkling light of the moon that poured down upon you. And then— you pulled away, leaning your forehead against his chest as you struggled to catch your breath.

“Hypothetically speaking,” Page began, his breath coming out in short pants. “I think Violet could do that, but— but obviously I wouldn’t want to do that with—“

“Page,” you gave a breathless laugh, listening to the beat of his heart thumping against your skin. “It was a hypothetical joke.”

“Oh.” He fell silent for a second— literally. “That wasn’t really the correct use of hypo-“

Suppressing a groan, you lifted your head and met his eyes, “Page, are we going to talk about my use of the word ‘hypothetical’ for the rest of the night or are you going to kiss me?”

Page didn’t speak, only choosing gaze at you with a lovesick smile locked onto his face. Leaning down, he trapped your lips against his own once more.

The rest of the night faded away into oblivion and the only eyes set to focus on the two teenagers were the ones above, and following that night, the sky seemed to twinkle only the slightest bit brighter for the two. What they didn’t notice, however, was the whispering of the stars as their light shone upon them— the whispers of. . . fate?

#page x mc #storyscape #storyscape page #storyscape eternal city #eternal city #eternal city page #storyscape page x mc #fanfiction #fanfic #bruh...#i want todie #thank u to the anon that gave the idea to do a first date thinf #THING FUCK #my hero #ALSO #it’s a little ooc #dont kill me #..

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bourbonandbullet · 5 years

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Okay, where the Storyscape Titanic fan fiction at? I’m already jonesing for a third play through.

#storyscape #titanic #storyscape titanic #my heart #fanfiction #matteo vasari #please send help

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crystal-prism · 2 years

Text

Sadie's Masterlist

(Updated as of 5-29-2022)

WELCOME to my world!

The name's Sadie! I write and do some graphic design on the side. I am a chiper shipper first and a person second. Just kidding, I do have some personality, but I'm stuck in a brainrot right now so you'll have to deal with me spreading the chiper (much better known as bitemark here on tumblr) agenda 80% of the time in this blog. If that's what you came here for, expect occasional fanfiction posts and a WHOLE LOT of memes.

You can catch me on Ao3 and Twitter.

LITTLE bit about me

Pronouns: She/Her

I'm currently a freshman in college studying how to be a corporate slave

I'm into a lot of things creative! Talk to me about writing, graphic design (not a drawer-ist guys, there's a difference), ui/ux design, music (i do piano), and photography!

I beta-read for my writer friends and ideate with my artist friends a lot

Q&A

What do you do?

I read, write, and make some memes. Asks and DMs are open for artists, writers and chiper shippers. I'm open to collaborations, beta-reading, and talking about each other's brainrot (preferably about chiper)! I'm open to talking about other things. To see what fandoms I'm part of, scroll to the next section.

Do you take commissions?

I do! But not at the moment because finals is killing me, I will be available during the summer break. Commissions are coming on June 30th—let me work the logistics first so that you get a smooth experience commissioning me, yeah? Stay tuned!

Can I submit a fic/headcanon/imagine/meme to your blog?

Sure! This would mean that the post might be subject to editing though. Other details such as crediting and post details may be negotiated in the DMs.

ALL aboard my ship of ships!

Am currently on my valorant brainrot rampage, but believe it or not I came from many fandoms (and hence: many ships) before becoming active. Here are some of them:

Games: Valorant, Life is Strange, Until Dawn, Final Fantasy VII, Detroit: Become Human, Overwatch, Tears of Themis, Genshin, Choices, Storyscapes (only real ones know), Dress Up! Time Princess

Books: Nancy Drew, Percy Jackson, Pride and Prejudice, Jane Eyre, Harry Potter, Divergent, Hunger Games, Legend, Shadowhunters, Market of Monsters, Selection

Shows: Castlevania, James Bond, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Sherlock, Arcane, Crash Landing On You, My Private Life, My Name

Miscellaneous: Webtoon/Manhwa/Otome Isekai (too many)

Note that while I'm familiar with the aforementioned works, it doesn't necessarily mean I know the community/fanworks.

MASTERLIST

fanfiction

viper x chamber

Fosse Aux Vipères: Chapter 1

To Grow Old In.: Part 1, Part 2

In Written Adoration One-Shot

imagines, fanfic ideas

lying (viper x chamber)

kingdom employees (viper x chamber)

incorrect quotes

touch me (viper x chamber)

we aren't dating (viper x chamber)

my tea (cypher)

valorant x eleceed (jett & yoru)

two can keep a secret (chamber & chamber)

memes, miscellaneous

chiper shipping dynamic: dangerous

rejection (viper, chamber, yoru, skye)

Valorant Agents as Kim Possible Characters

canonical flirting chamber lines with viper

knock knock (viper & chamber)

in this house (chiper)

valorant agents to their doubles (brimstone, cypher, neon, chamber)

#about me #crystalprism #ask #q&a #valorant #valorant chamber #valorant viper #chiper #bitemark #viper x chamber #introduction #fanfic #pinned post #asexual

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queerchoicesblog · 3 years

Note

Did I check your blog several times awaiting the new chapter ? And did I re-read the whole serie, willing to get more and more of your story and your wonderful writing ? You can bet I did ! I've started coming to your blog because of Choices' fanfictions, stayed for the poetic flow of your words and while it's a wonder to see you thrive in those orignal stories of yours (I'm partial to the Belle Epoque one, as a French woman myself) I'm excited to see those beautiful Storyscape characters 1/

At last, here I am, sweet nonny 😊

First of all, you have no idea how your messages made me happy: THANK YOU! 😊❤

I truly loved Storyscape and miss it so much: how nice it would have been to cheer us up or at least distract us during these trying months.

And you're French! So nice, your language is utterly gorgeous! I can only hope I'm not butchering it in my fics, my French is bad sadly 😔

As for your questions, Surviving the Titanic, and what title Zetta would have chosen if she had to. Well, as you said, going through the traumatic experience even if in fiction must be hard for her yet she agrees all the same, setting it as the beginning of her renaissance. Judging by the plot of the original book, the whole idea of the movie seems to come from Richard: he's ambitious, young. I believe he genuinely cares for Zetta but it sounds like a lifetime occasion screaming easy success. So the title is simple, straight to the point, in line with the titles of the pictures back then.

I like to think that Zetta's agreement came after much consideration: is it the right thing to do? Since the story of the picture is so clearly inspired to Adele and Hileni, I headcanon Zetta eventually agreed on the project and taking charge of the script. That way to her eyes she could make a proper compromise: avoiding mere commercial exploitation of the tragedy and turning it into an homage to Adele. Also, she's in the business for too long to ignore that a story like that was all the audience could get of that night. Probably, if she could have picked the title, she would have added a bit of poetry and focused on the main characters? Surviving the Titanic sounds a bit impersonal...

As for Zetta's six months long silence. Yeah, at first, it didn't make sense to me even if I get the authors probably looked for the dramatic suspense between the arrival and the party: it seems to be a common feature for all the LIs. I tried to read through the lines of the movie party dialogue.

This seems to be the source of Zetta's torment. She stated that she had tried to put her feelings down into words for Adele but she never came up with a good answer.

When I read it the first time, I thought she wanted to break up with us but when I picked the "we should end things" option, she was quite upset and hurt. So it's not what she meant all along, I think. After that playthrough, her line sounds more like a squeal of pain. She wants to be with Adele, she loves her but must marry Richard to save her career so what she can offer to a free spirit like Miss Carrem? I think she feels guilty, desperately looking for a way not to lose Adele but not knowing why.

I will answer about dear Lawrence in the next bunch of asks 😉

As for your consideration over living as a member of the lgbtq community, I must say I have a soft spot for stories (either real or fictional) of wlw/mlm/trans people back in the old days or from a different era when they probably felt even lonelier or more hopeless and self doubting than us. I wish I could hug them tight and assure them that they are not alone and unloved/unlovable as they thought. And that decades, centuries after we live better lives: we can marry each other in many countries unlike back them, governments can promulgate laws to protect people against homophobic/biphobic/transphobic violence. Even if yes, recent events like the one Laverne denounced on her social media show, there is room for improvement as we still can't hold hands with a partner or exchanging PDAs with a partner or simply walk in the street without a care.

But yes, I hope it brings them some joy to see the progresses we have made through the years as a community and how we keep fighting all over the world for our rights and our right to be, to love, to exist like any other human being 🏳️‍🌈

#long post #lovely nonny #zetta x adele series

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