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laufire · 3 years

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Supernatural s3

It’s so unfair that the season that has Ruby AND Bela is so short :(((. I was done with it waaaay too quickly, and now I’m speed running through s4 xD (which, like the first time around, is Strong Mixed Feelings territory).

-My girl Ruby!!!! I was so happy to have her back, I kept grinning like a loon every time she was on screen. It’s quite interesting watching the 1.0 and 2.0 versions so close to each other, instead of as they air. I have... Thoughts, on whether Ruby as a double agent was something planned or that they decided as they went, but that’s for the s4 post. s3!Ruby really doesn’t come across as one (“I don’t believe in the devil” oh I wish sometimes xD, I love my nonbelievers), imo, but the beauty of such a device is that you can rationalize anything she does as devious if you want to xD

And it goes without saying that I love her interactions with Sam. THIS SHIP ISTG. I love how immediately ~attuned to her he is lol, his present and instinctive concern for her even if he tries to mask his interest as “practical”. And all the repeated times Sam’s conflicted between her and Dean -like when he deviates Dean shot (wasting one of the Colt’s bullets lmfao) or during the argument about the virgin sacrifice xD. And the “that’s my boy”/ “little fallen angel on your shoulder” quotes!!! Ruby 1.0 deserved to be railed by Sam too, smh.

My favourite episode of hers is “Jus in Bello” (which would be my fave of the season just by virtue of having both Bela and Ruby in the same episode lol. Not interacting, of course, the world as we know it wouldn’t have survived). I just love that she gets that final moment of I TOLD YOU SO to the brothers xD. I really like how she expands on the demonic lore of the show- I love, LOVE the detail about how all demons used to be humans, how they’re souls corrupted in hell. And that in her past life she was a witch (there was this really good fic in Spanish fandom about it... I need to hunt it down).

BTW, though I think her interactions with Dean in that episode are interesting, it really hammers home how much I hate him sometimes xD. Can you stop saying misogynistic slurs for TWO GODDAMN MINUTES, DEAN (and as we know from as early as this season, only HE can have demon/monster friends!! What a fucking hypocrite xD). I freaking love the moment in the finale when she viciously yells him about how she wishes she could see him in hell lmao (and how it foreshadows that when she shows sympathy later, it’s actually Lilith in disguise lmfao). I hate Dean gets the last word in their dynamic, tbqh. Until the s15 cameo, at least xDD

One thing that’s been bothering me xD: the French fries. Demons are vulnerable to salt, like other spirits, right? (and hey, look what a nice piece of foreshadowing that was). How does that translate to food lol. Because Ruby adores French fries, and they obviously contain salt. It’s like spicy food for humans? Or like pineapple? Inquiring minds etc. xD

-I still cannot believe Bela Talbot was only on the show for six episodes lmao. Her presence still lingers in the watchers’ heads so much?? Which is understandable because she’s Lead Girl Material if there was ever any lol. The care with which they styled her even?? You don’t do that for just any character lmao (I mean, just look at most of SPN’s female characters for comparison xD).

Her ship with Dean could’ve really been something, too -even if I hate Dean in it, I can’t deny it packs a punch, narrative-wise. I mean, the Batcat undertones alone!! The fake married undercover shenanigans!! And I think it’s really interesting that she’s such a blind spot for him; Dean’s unusually intuitive about people, but with Bela he takes everything at face value and she can fool him like no other (while, OTOH, is Sam who questions her facade and wants to see more). If he hadn’t been such an idiot (and such an asshole) he could’ve had a really powerful ship. Sucks to be him lol.

Anyway. Man, I love her. So much. I love how Gordon’s threats to kill her don’t work on her, and I love that the show basically said “Bela killing her abusive parents is good, actually” (I’m so tired of forgiveness narratives, you guys. This entire show is founded on revenge, so let me get my revenge fantasies in peace!!) xDD. And I love, LOVE that she withheld that truth from Dean, that she decided he wasn’t worth it. OTOH, you know, fuck the fans that got her written out, definitely; but on the other, I do love how her story ended (and that it was a clear "fuck you" to shitty fans). Doesn’t stop me for wanting to read and re-read (and maybe write!) even more “Bela escapes hell” fix-its, but still.

Also, very important question: what happened to her cat?? It’s the cat alright?? I’m going to headcanon that she left them with that cougar friend of hers lol.

-So. THE DEAL. Okay. Oof. I love this storyline, a lot. A loooot. I love the conflict it creates between the brothers (as long as there’s still conflict and Sam hasn’t yet started taking everything lying down I can enjoy that part of their narrative lol). I love Dean’s initial forced giddiness about “making the most out of his last year” and I love the moment Dean decides he does want to try to live because it makes the last few episodes all the most desperate and cruel (and hey, I’ve heard he only went to hell because the season was cut short due to a writers’ strike... if that’s true that’s so funny lmao).

My absolutely favourite part however? That you can FEEL Dean’s unvoiced resentment towards Sam. For Dean having to die for him, even if Sam never asked him to. He lashes out to Sam repeatedly through the season, but it really came to ahead in the dreamspace episode, where Dean confronts another version of himself that talks about how Sam was “dotted on” (the revisionism asldfkaf). This show is absolutely ruthless when it comes to showing you its characters’ ugly, unfair reactions to things and it’s my favourite thing evah.

Speaking of the dreamspace episode, OMFG. I loved both brothers there. Dean’s hallucination, seeing himself as a demon? And how he let out his anger about John?? Beautiful, truly (regarding John, I also loved their different reactions when it looked like his spirit had contacted them: Dean jumping on it and Sam detached skepticism). But my favourite part has to be when Sam uses the villain’s abusive father against him. Like. Damn. That was cold-blooded o.0

The second-to-last episode, when Sam tracked down that Frankenstein doctor to try and make Dean immortal was ABSOLUTELY HORRIFYING OMG. I loved that. I love that Sam wanted to use it for both them. It was some scary shit. I also love the scene where the crossroads demon questions whether Sam really wants to break the deal, I’m gathering it’s going to be nice foreshadowing later on in the show lol.

Anyway. I also found Dean’s death scene more impactful than Sam’s. Partially because of the horror of it, but mostly because I think at this type of scenes, Padalecki is better. Sam’s grief felt more real, Dean’s got me out of the scene (it’s the voice, I think. Sometimes Ackles’ voice takes me out of scenes, it sounds... forced).

I also really enjoyed how the time loop episode wrapped around this subplot. It managed to be both heartbreaking and mind-numbly hilarious lmfao. Like?? All the deaths?? Were so pathetic?? I tip my hat to Ackles because I don’t think most actors could carry plots like this half as well lmfao.

Sidenote, it’s always a trip to see The Trickster God knowing that fucker is Gabriel. Archangel “hey Mary do you accept God knocking you up” Gabriel. Which I guess isn’t exactly a thing in this show?? Since according to the wikia SPN Jesus was “just a man” (and let me tell you, I’m tickled pink by the fact that out of ALL mythological figures, specifically all CHRISTIAN mythological figures, the show decided to go “nah” on Jesus Christ. I mean, I guess he’d take away from Dean’s, Sam’s and Castiel’s resurrection narratives, but still. It’s so funny!!).

-Gordon Walker remains a superbly acted and fascinating character with extra racist nonsense alsdkfjasdf. But I can’t deny I loved seeing him as a vampire. He was terrifying. And I’m definitely shipping him with Kubrick, ouch xD

-The Ghostfacers episode is... something. As in, incredibly exploitative and homophobic and with an egregious case of BYG (and the first where I’d say it’s incontestable to claim the trope was used. s1 and s2 are muddy territory given the circumstances, IMO, but this one is 300% BYG), but so successfully manipulative my heart hurt for Corbett and Corbett x Ed still. Fuck them for that ngl. I do still enjoy how anti-Winchesters they all are though xD

-3x01 introduces the one nice marriage of hunters so far, between a black couple. The man dies in a gross, horrifying way within the episode ofc (because he was Mean to the the brothers duh). She makes it out alive, and since she doesn’t reappear in the show she gets to live. So for now black women have a sliiiiiightly better track record in SPN than track guys there: they get to appear in a few more episodes and be more fleshed out (Victor, Gordon), but as long as they’re only in one episode they get to live!! (Cassie, Tamara).

-Rufus and Bobby are exes, right? Right?? Probably still married in some state? You know that post about how when gay marriage was legalized across the USA there were a lot of issues because some couples had split and never bothered to divorce, since it was only legal in one place? That post was made for them. Pity Rufus is a black man, and as such has a limited number of allowed appearances before he’s killed off ¬¬

-I would’ve enjoyed Dean’s moments with Lisa and Ben more (it’s just so RIGHT that in this moment he’d want Ben to be his) if my knowledge of future spoilers didn’t perpetually have me in a state of “pls keep this guy away from kids” lol.

-They had Harmony’s actress (BTVS) and they made her a vampire!! The show’s hard on for the Buffyverse is a bit of a hit and miss but I can’t say I don’t relate xDD.

-I know Jensen Ackles can sing (in fact thanks to youtube I know a few of the actors can... is there a musical episode. Does this show have its own OMWF. I need to know). So why. WHY. Does he sound like that during “Dead or Alive”??? I actually like the scene but he sounds so off-key lmao.

-BTW, I found out that apparently Katie Cassidy and Lauren Cohan originally auditioned for each other’s roles añslkdfjasf. I can’t picture it. Ruby 1.0 is Ruby 1.0 and Bela is Bela xD. Although I’ve seen each playing roles that could meld with the other, just. Nope. Good choice on the casting there lol.

#talking to the void #my thoughts #spn thoughts #supernatural #spnruby #samruby #bela talbot #deanbela #deanruby #sam winchester #dean winchester #gordon walker #ruby 1.0 #spn gabriel #ghostfacers #alan corbett #bobby x rufus #spn s3 #the winchesters get to have a tag I GUESS

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scoobydoodean · 2 months

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Everybody leaves you, Dean. You noticed? Mommy. Daddy. Even Sam. You ever ask yourself why? Maybe it’s not them. Maybe, it’s you.

(5.16 "Dark Side of the Moon")

Just. A quick post on this, because I think that some fans, right along with Dean during this interaction, have been tricked into believing that this is true. They have been tricked by this dialogue into believing that Dean is a clingy, overly needy person who pushes every single person he loves away by needing too much or just by being too much in general.

This is not true.

Mary didn't leave because her four year old was a burden, and if she had, that wouldn't have been Dean's fault at four years old. Mary died because she made a demon deal before she even had kids.

John didn't leave because Dean was a burden. John's absences from Dean (AND SAM's) life happened because of John's issues—because he coped with trauma through vengeance and lost sight of his family until the end, when his last act was to sacrifice himself to save Dean's life.

Recognizing that Mary and John leaving Dean had nothing to do with Dean being a burden in real life, the idea that Dean is always being left behind and that him always being the common denominator implicates him breaks down.

Dean and Sam's relationship is a particularly complicated one—made so by multiple deaths, parentification in childhood, childhood neglect, and terrifying apocalyptic destinies. To make Sam running away at 12 or going to school about Dean being the problem is to vastly undersell the conflict Sam had with John. In fact, even with Sam clashes with Dean directly in the early seasons, he is usually using Dean as a stand in for a fight he can't have with their father—and we see the actual blow up occur between father and son in 1.20. Strife between Sam and Dean about living in each other's pockets also isn't one-sided when that kind of strife rears its head. In fact, Dean was the one relieved to be away from Sam a little earlier in the season, from 5.02 to the end of 5.04. Dean called his family chains in 5.03 and was very directly referring to Sam.

There's good and bad among Sam and Dean's feelings about each other, but we know from 5.22 "Swan Song" that the idea sold in 5.16 "Dark Side of the Moon"—that Sam doesn't have happy memories with Dean—is a flat out lie. Happy memories with Dean are literally what breaks Lucifer's control over Sam's body, flipping a switch in Sam's head as memory after memory of being on the road with Dean rushes fondly through Sam's mind.

Zachariah leads Sam and Dean through heaven like rats in a maze. He knew where they were the entire time they were in heaven. Sam and Dean were lead to believe they could hide, but Zachariah always knew where they were. He popped up in certain areas to drive them from one place to another, in a loop through memories selling the story Zachariah wanted to sell.

He pushed them away from the happy memories Sam has with Dean (as seen in "Swan Song") and toward memories where Sam was away from their family (two of which specifically represented escape from John) to sell the narrative that Sam doesn't care about Dean. Zachariah tries to sell this narrative because 5.04 "The End" culminated in Dean feeling he and Sam were both stronger together than apart. Zachariah is deliberately trying to break Dean's belief in that family bond to drive him away from his family and toward despair. He wants Dean to stop believing that he could ever be enough to keep Sam from saying "Yes". Zachariah wants Dean to see himself as disposable because Zachariah wants Dean to make himself a disposable vessel. Zachariah wants Dean to feel completely unloved and alone.

#5.16 #season 5 #pk rewatches spn number ?#5.22 #angels lie #angels and demons lie #zachariah #spn revisionisms

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scoobydoodean · 11 months

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In season 1 alone, at least three times Sam and Dean imply that Dean is the reason Sam is hunting again when that is quite literally not what happened. Like that revisionism is already starting.

Dean took Sam home at the end of the Pilot and then Jess burned on the goddamned ceiling. And you're telling me the difference between Sam going and not going hunting is Dean? Sam doesn't go on the hunting trail after that without Dean telling him he's lonely without so many words, and Sam out of concern for him and even a little for John, agreeing to help Dean look for two days? Dean takes him back to Stanford at the end of those two days, and then he watches his girlfriend be murdered exactly the same way that his mom was, and we're saying without Dean showing up two days before that happens, and Sam going on a short trip with him then coming back, Sam would never have ever gone on the revenge trail? He would have just known that the M.O.'s matched and done nothing? Yeah I don't think so.

#spn revisionisms #sams motivations

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scoobydoodean · 3 months

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Sam in 4.04 to justify working with Ruby:

SAM You were gone. I was here. I had to keep on fighting without you.

Sam in 5.05:

SAM Dean, one of the reasons I went off with Ruby...was to get away from you.

God forbid Sam so much as pick a consistent lane when claiming his actions are Dean's fault.

#5.05 #season 5 #pk rewatches spn number ?#the flannel business #projecting displaced aggression and scapegoating in spn #youre such a control freak #spn revisionisms

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scoobydoodean · 1 year

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One important nugget from 1.09 "Home" contrasting with 1.21 "Salvation". When John tries to chide Dean for not calling him to tell him about Sam's visions... he is criticizing Dean over something John... already knew. He already knew that Sam had visions, and I find it very very hard to believe he didn't demand the full lowdown from Missouri on what lead brought Sam and Dean to Lawrence:

But when Sam's visions appear to get stronger and have a deeper meaning, John is panicked and feels guilty, and he can't handle feeling guilty, so he immediately tries to rewrite history so that he didn't know anything and this is all Dean's fault.

He knew. He knew Sam had visions!!! He just doesn't want to take responsibility for that knowledge and that he didn't do anything with it and didn't follow up on it.

#pk rewatches spn number ?#1.09 #1.21 #spn revisionisms #projecting displaced aggression and scapegoating in spn #season 1 #john #parentification #we probably have a lot more in common than just about anyone #i dont deserve what he put on me

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scoobydoodean · 1 year

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As an aside, both Sam and Dean do revisionism for their dad, and they both don't—in different ways. Dean does much of the revisionism in season 1, but Sam DOES also engage in this practice. They both hold to the narrative that "He did the best he could" (and Sam is the first person to say that, in "Bugs"). Like. Nobody wants to believe that their dad didn't give a shit about them? And I do actually think John... cared about them. But he cared about revenge more, and being right more, and being obeyed more. Sam and Dean have a lot of compassion for their dad, because that's what you do for your parents. But the anger—the resentment—also goes very, very deep, and there's a weird tendency to suggest that Dean was making excuses for John throughout the show while Sam saw the truth, and that is... not accurate. (Sam is also the guy who says "Well at least Dad didn't beat the shit out of us" in "Nightmare" and starts what he thinks is a funny story about John catching Dean drinking and Dean nearly being raped as a teenager.)

Dean's rage at John is there from the beginning, but he doesn't talk about it (voluntarily—so excluding when the Shifter reveals his feelings in "Skin") until Scarecrow when he still really can't get the words out. The bulk of Dean's anger? It comes after John is dead, and he admits how he damaged Dean, then promptly fucking dies and leaves Dean to clean up his messes yet again, turning his own apology into a big fat nothing burger. And when Sam starts talking about hunting in John's memory in 2.02? Oh boy. Cue disgust from Dean there. Then there's "Dream A Little Dream of Me", and Dean's treatises on dead beat dads (Sam makes... interesting faces there) through seasons 4 and 5, and not wanting to be like his dad in season 6 and ultimately giving up a family because he's terrified of becoming him. And in the midst of that, we also have Sam who. Largely... makes peace with John I think, actually, in a way that Dean never really does.

#kinda #1.14 #1.08 #1.06 #10.09 #3.10 #2.02 #pk rewatches spn number ?#spn revisionisms #john #season 1 #season 2 #season 3 #season 10 #we probably have a lot more in common than just about anyone #i dont deserve what he put on me

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