thinking about akane/sora.
sigh that whole thing along with her (their? both of their?) dynamics with utsuro, and how that kind of bleeds over into yuki.
i was gonna put some shit in the tags but my brain just kept writing so ahem here we go (sorry as always for the nonsensical rambling if you can’t tell i just use tumblr as a place to word vomit about the things that are Taking Up My Brain)
The main reason I’m not a huge fan of Sora/Yuki is because how much of it is just Sora’s programming? But at the same time that just makes everything 1000x more interesting because where does Sora begin and the programming stop, yknow? Sora is so vastly different from Akane imo that it feels weird to call Sora nothing but an imitation of Akane, but… canonically, i mean, that’s all she really is
I’m definitely a big believer in your own interpretations of media (and especially with some of Kodaka’s choices that i don’t personally agree with) and in Sora’s case I kind of don’t believe she’s just this really simple ai. I definitely think that her relationship with Akane and the melding of them is v. v. interesting and could lead to a lot of emotional development but it becomes a lot less interesting to me when it’s just like “oh yeah sora isn’t even like. anywhere close to real she can never be real whatsoever” like is the questioning of her own reality not enough? cuz her emotions feel pretty fucking real and it feels ridiculous to say otherwise
In my own fanfiction & writing for a post sdra2 what-if-sora-survives a lot of her struggle is with figuring out how much of akane is still in her. like. that’s almost a seperate person, but wait, no it’s not. i have her memories. i have her face. i stare in the mirror and she looks back and am i her? am i the one who did all those horrible things? or was it someone else? and sora’s struggle with that could be so so interesting
and how yuki/utsuro plays into it too ughhhh
did sora ever really love yuki, or was it all just the programming? and is that programming her or is it akane? and who is she, if she’s not just akane? utsuro and akane are 100% an unhealthy ass relationship and that always will kinda poison any variation of sora/akane x yuki/utsuro ships for me.
but utsuro and akane at the same time are so fucking interestinggggg in their toxic mess like she fucking worships him. he is a god to her but to him? akanes just another follower. a particularly loyal one but at the end of the day he. does. not. care. about. her. whatsoeverrrrrr!!! he doesn’t care about anything, not even himself
and i think she kinda knows that, or is aware but she doesn’t even care because to her utsuro is a god and she’s thankful he even lets her worship him. because he saved her. and how fucked up must akane’s situation must have been? i mean, i can’t imagine. and now, post sdra2, sora has all these memories. she remembers all this shit, all the reasons why she worships and loves utsuro but also. she has other stuff. she has yuki, and yoruko, and all these new memories that she had made. but, but… but she would still pick him.
and doesn’t that prove it?
that after all this time that sora didn’t even get to experience, she is the same.
the same girl that did all these horrific things in the name of worship.
is she also, then, the person she was before those memories came back? the person who flirted with yoruko and created bonds and made sarcastic comments.
is she…
is she both? neither?
well, we’ll never get an answer.
because at the end, she did what she always did.
she sacrificed herself for him.
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This is the version with Nightstar btw when she eventually bites the dust
Nightstar wanted to turn the Clans to worship only one of the three, that being Horoa (inspiration is the fact that a fuckin Lion gave her, her final life in canon material and the whole thing is way more Christianized- she is a Jesus and Moses figure in the story at times).
So after a lifetime of trying to outlaw the honoring of the other two, and trying to force out anything that wasn’t in regards to Horoa- I like the idea of him personally seeing her end in the afterlife. After everything she’s done in his name.
Of course Nightstar wouldn’t see this as a bad thing. Anything to please Horoa (this probably infuriated said God even more)
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It’s my middle child’s 3rd birthday today 🥺
3 years ago my partner was deployed overseas and couldn’t come home for the birth because the military didn’t want to spend so much time quarantining their soldiers. Fortunately I had help as my parents were watching my son (at the time just a month shy of 2) for a few days before my due date and we had moved across the street from my partner’s parents when we found out about the deployment. So I had his mom with me at the hospital holding up her phone while we got to have a rare video call with my partner as we welcomed our daughter into the world after a very quick labor. I then had two months with our two very little kids by myself before he came home. It was an incredibly hectic time and I’m still not quite sure how I was able to get through all of that but here we are with the sweetest little 3 year old (let’s call her C) we could have asked for 🥰
C loves to play dress up and she has specific characters she’ll play as where you can’t refer to her as her name or she’ll get mad. She’s not C she’s Dr C or Baby or Baby Kitty or Princess Bucket (this was her first character and yes she does put a bucket on her head as a crown). Her favorite game to play is hide and seek and she loves dance parties and drawing and she’s obsessed with her 1 year old sister. We love C so much and I’m so excited to see how she grows and changes and learns over this next year ❤️
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My Mobile Suit Gundam (first movie) experience in a nutshell
Me, watching while only knowing MSG memes (and thought it was enough):
Amuro poor boyo...
Now I know why everyone is a fan of (1) Char Aznable:
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5 songs i’ve had on repeat lately
Tagged by @mysimsloveaffair. Thanks! I feel like I’ve done this tag quite recently but I feel like sharing some music again haha. I’ve been all over the place with genres lately. 😅
Anyway, in no particular order:
Taylor Swift - Carolina
Orla Gartland - Why Am I Like This?
Bon Jovi - Born To Be My Baby
Sonata Arctica - Fullmoon
Journey - Separate Ways
I’m gonna tag @poisonfireleafs, @arogaba, @dragonplumbobs, @bobapplesimblr, @fatessimstuff, @wannabecatwriter and everyone who wants to share what they’ve been listening to lately. No pressure of course, feel free to ignore! 😄
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I'm beyond angry that it's gotten to such a point just hearing about grandma disturbs my peace... why is it so fucking difficult for that woman to understand that the people she knows is in fact human? They aren't just robots who can just keep going, smiling like nothing has happened, all the damn time? They actually have needs and limited energy and time like everyone else.
No, they should just drop everything and preform the role she wants them to whenever she wants them to. They should just please her and who cares if they have problems or can't even take care of themselves right now? No they should just jump up, all filled with energy, and just do shit with her because she wants to do stuff.
I am just so fucking tired of this.
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