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luciferlightbringer · 4 months

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Love In a Hopeless Place

Chapter 2

Here we are with chapter 2! Lucifer and reader meet, enjoy! xoxo, Dany :)

Chapter 1|Chapter 2|Chapter 3|Updated through Chapter 12 Lucifer x prostitute fem!reader

Word Count:5.2k (I'm so sorry, lol) CW: Trauma, panic, flashbacks, Smut(ish/mostly lead up), angst, comfort, sub/dom dynamics, prostitution, anxiety, depression

Lucifer was in his study working on another one of his many rubber duck creations when his phone started to buzz on the desk with a text message. He jumped a little with a small 'Ah!' at the vibration, and the duck flew out of his hands and into one of the many piles of ducks that filled the room.

"Shit, welp... not finding that one anytime soon", he said running his fingers through his hair while looking out at the sea of ducks, before turning his attention to his phone.

The preview of the text from his driver on the front screen read, "On our way back with our guest." Lucifer stared at the text, and his stomach immediately tightened with... excitement? Anxiety? Was he going to throw up- no he was fine... Right? Yes. No? Fuck. Why did this feel so scary?

Lucifer did not know what he we feeling, he just knew he only had a few minutes before his guest for the evening would arrive... and he had no idea what he was doing. Lucifer started pacing and pulling a little at his own hair, starting to stress and talk to himself.

"Should I have been preparing something? Maybe I should clean! No... wait I have people for that... M-maybe I should pick up some of the ducks? Why would I need to pick up the ducks? Maybe she would want to see the ducks? Lucifer, why would a prostitute want to see your stupid rubber ducks?!" Lucifer said as he paced back and forth on want little open floor space their was in the room, before he stopped, took a breath, and smoothed back his hair and tried to breathe.

"I'm fine. I'm fine. I'm cool. I'm fine." he said as he rolled his shoulders and straightened his bowtie as he walks out of his study and back down the hall to his room. "I'm the King of Hell, and I'm the customer. Who cares? I'm sure girls all over Hell would be dying for the chance to take care of and service me. She is the lucky one here that I even get to grace her presence!" He stopped in front of the mirror in his room, popping on his hat and grabbing his cane before posing in the mirror and flashing a toothy grin at himself.

Lucifer looks over his own reflection in the mirror, and the longer he stared, the more his smile faded and his shoulders slumped. He wrapped his arms around himself in a half self-hug, "So then... why do I feel like... such a loser?"

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The car soon pulls up to a big beautiful manor and parks, the driver gets out and comes to open your door, offering you a hand to help you out.

"Thank you," you say with a sweet and flirty smile as you grab the man's hand and step out of the car. You try hard to hold your confident expression and stifle your surprise as you get out and see your new surroundings, looking around admiring the beauty. Your normal cantor you use with most clients suddenly feels like it might be inappropriate here, so you hold your tongue.

Internally, though, your thought process runs wild, 'Whoa, wait, what the fuck? I've worked for some high rollers before, but this... this feels like its on an entirely different level.... Who the fuck is this guy?'

The driver breaks your slight panic as he gestures for you to follow him. You are escorted up the front steps and into the front entry way past the giant ornate front doors. In the front room off to one side were a few red chairs and a couch with gold trim, all centered around a white marble coffee table. The driver gestures towards the seating, "Please, have a seat while I inform your host that you have arrived."

You curtsy in respond because you were starting to feel like that was the right response for this type of place, and watch as the man turned and started to walk down the hallway. You go to sit on one end of the red couch, damn it was a nice couch, and you start to look at the room around you. You're inner voice continuing with the general track of 'What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? How is this place even bigger and nicer on the inside?!' playing in your head.

Who could this be? This guy is crazy well off, seems to like red, white, and gold, it was everywhere in the decorations. Also he... had good taste in decorations. It looked way nicer here than anywhere else you had ever seen in hell. Not just because of the amount of money in the place, but also because of how the design felt. It almost felt like a slightly edgier version of what you would expect buildings to look like in heaven. Lots of little details and motifs in the crowning on the walls and art around the manor. Lots of stuff like apples, snakes, little things that looked like angel wings-

Your thought process freezes as the puzzles start to fall together into an answer.

Wait.

Apples?

Snakes?!

ANGEL WINGS?!

You start to shake a little and fidget with your dress a little. You may have not been in hell long, but there were some things you pick up on quickly, even in new places. 'There is noooo way. That's impossible. Right? Where were other people who are known for that symbology... right... Who else in hell...? Maybe it's someone you just don't know? Uhhhh.... Oh! Wasn't he married? Well... that doesn't mean anything half of the time, you've fucked married guys. More importantly, if this is who I think it is... what would the LITERAL KING OF HELL, need a call girl for? No, there is no way it could be him, that would be stupid...'

Then, you hear a cane start to tap down the hallway, and time feels like it slows down. You turn to look in the direction of the sound, and down the long manor hallway, you can make out the unmistakable features of Lucifer, the fallen angel, the King of Hell himself, followed by his driver. You feel your skin grow hot and your heart rate pick up as you swallow hard, watching him approach.

He was... much softer looking than you expected. Many of the angelic features were still present, pale near-white skin, golden blonde hair, soft facial features, and they mixed in well with his more demonic features, red and gold eyes, sharp grin, and dark ashy claws that held his signature apple cane. You'd seen his face on magazines and maybe once on tv, but now upon seeing him in the flesh, you realize that pure imagines didn't seen do him any justice.

You realize you have less than a few seconds to calm yourself and get ready to make a first impression. You take a deep breath, let it out, straighten yourself in your seat and think, 'He's just another client, that's all I need to focus on. My goal is to fulfill his wishes'.

As he gets a few feet closer you stand, and curtsy with a confident smile on your face. "Your majesty, what an unexpected surprise this is. Oh, I apologize, I mean... Lance."

Lucifer responds with a hearty chuckle before putting up a hand, "No need for formalities or code names here. Just Lucifer is fine. You must be (y/n)?" he says as he starts to examine the woman in front of him up and down.

You straighten up from your curtsy and place a hand on a slightly popped hip as you look at Lucifer, "I am, and I am honored to be serving you tonight."

The driver comes up and asks for your coat. You slip it off as elegantly as you can, fully aware that your show for Lucifer had already begun, and handed it to the driver. He tells you where he will be when you and the master have concluded your visit for the evening, puts up your coat in a nearby closet, and walks into another room close to the main door, and closes the door behind him.

Lucifer watched the sultry way you slipped off your jacket, and the alluring dress that was revealed from beneath it. Simple, black, sleeveless, a v shaped neck line that showed the perfect amount of cleavage, hugged your body in all the right places, and also allowed for a long slit that showed off plenty of the soft skin of your leg. The woman before him was beautiful, but in a way he didn't expect. Not in a "porn star, big boobs, stereotypical bimbo" kind of way, but in a soft... normal kind of way. It made him feel a little calmer in a way. A couple new emotions started to join the mixture that swirled in his stomach, curiosity, amusement... lust... Nothing had even happened yet, and Lucifer could already start to feel heat start to rise around his collar.

You and Lucifer where now completely alone in the main area of the manor.

You turn back to see Lucifer eyeing you. You smile.

"You like what you see, Lucifer?" you purr as you take a few steps towards him.

Lucifer shifts a little as he stands as his cheeks tint pink, feeling almost guilty for being caught staring, before remembering he was allowed to, "Oh uh... y-yes. Yes, I do." He says, returning to his curated confident grin.

You giggle, stepping closer and offering your right hand to him, which he takes with his right hand, "I am yours for the night to use as you see fit" you say with a sly flirty smile.

'Fuck, I hope this is coming off ok', you think to yourself.

'Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck,' Lucifer thinks, trying to will his cheeks into not turning a darker shade of pink, 'Oh she is VERY good, and I am very out of practice.'

Lucifer returns the sly smile, "Oh I intend to." he says looking you up and down again as he kisses your hand.

'Fuck, he is good', you think at the same time.

Lucifer continues to hold your hand as he turns in closer to your right side, looping your hand under his left arm so that you and now holding it, and he looks at you with a "Shall we then?" before he starts to escort you further into the manor.

As you start to walk through the manor with Lucifer, this is when you really notice how he was a bit shorter than you expected, especially with the heels you were wearing. Nothing wrong with that, just not something you expected. He was a cutie, and you were excited that you were going to be able to help make him feel good that night. Honored even.

Lucifer felt transfixed by every inch of sensory that came from being in contact with you, the way your hand held onto the sleeve of his jacket, the way you would shift against him as you walked, the smell of your perfume, it was borderline intoxicating. His brain was running a million miles a minute between your touch, smell, what he would say next, what would happen when you both got to his room, how he wanted to keep himself from turning into the room and immediately pouncing on you. He felt like he might lose his mind.

All you could see of Lucifer was a sly grin and a confident walk towards his room.

The two of you entered Lucifer's large bedroom and you let go of his arm so that he could go to close the door behind you. He put down his cane, and started to undo the clasps of his suit jacket. You walked up behind Lucifer as he finished the clasps, slid your hands over his shoulders, hooking your fingers under the collar.

"May I?" you cooed softly in his ear.

He gulped and nodded as you glided it off his shoulders and down his arms, trying as best you can you make sure your fingers made contact with his arms as much as possible.

Lucifer had to fight a soft moan from escaping his throat at your touch. You deviously smiled to yourself behind Lucifer at the sound of his stifled moan as you took the jacket and carefully hung the jacket off the side of his mirror. You turned back around to see Lucifer taking off his hat and setting it down on a nearby surface, trying hard tame the hunger in his eyes as he looked at you, a visible bulge starting to form in his pants.

Seeing the King of Hell's eyes hunger for you gave you a devious idea to try. 'I wonder what role he likes to play?' you think to yourself.

You chuckle, and start to walk a circle around Lucifer, eyeing him back as if he was your prey, which makes Lucifer swallow hard again and make him lose a little of his edge, less of a dominant energy and leaning more submissive as he watched you circle him.

'Interesting', you think.

"Tell me. Do you prefer to lead, or follow?" you ask with a coy smile.

Lucifer thought for a moment, what did he usually do with Lili- errr... in the past? He liked not having to think. Not having to lead would be really fucking nice actually.

"Follow", Lucifer said in a soft tone. This didn't surprise you, most powerful men wanted a break from it in the bedroom, from your experience. Getting to order Lucifer around was a once in a lifetime opportunity, and it got you excited just thinking about it.

You gave Lucifer a wicked smile before slinking up to him, softly grabbing his chin, getting your face very close to his before whispering, "Boots off. On the bed. Now."

Lucifer's heart beat started to pound in his ears as he took a moment as he processed the words, a shiver of pleasure jolting through his body, before quickly moving to throw off his boots and crawl onto his bed. He knew nothing in the moment beyond following your command. Lucifer got into place and then looked over at you, waiting for your next order for him.

'Fuck that was hot' he thought as he felt the heat spread across his chest.

You look towards Lucifer, turning you body to face him in his new position on the bed. You smirk and start to slowly slink towards him, making sure to roll your hips with every step to emphasize your curves, staring at him with your own hunger eyes.

Lucifer sat, transfixed by the way your hips swayed from side to side, the way your eyes felt like they were burning into his soul, his cheeks burning read. No thoughts existed in his head at that moment besides the thought of your curves coming towards him and the way that his cock throbbed for you in his pants.

You sat yourself on the end of his bed and kicked up your right leg over the other to unbuckle the clasp on one of your heels, making sure to position yourself so that Lucifer could see more of your leg through the slit in your dress and so that you cleavage showed more prominently from the V-neckline. You look up at him through your eyelashes to see him tremble a little, his breathing starting to labor. Oh lord, you could see just how much he needed this, and that excited you even more.

You finished unclipping your heel and you let it drop to the floor with a light clatter. You straightened up and looked over your shoulder at Lucifer, "Does my good boy want to help me with my other shoe?"

Lucifer gave a little whimper and bit his lip a little as he gave you an enthusiastic nod. He was so cute and desperate, if his tail was out it would probably be wagging.

You move a little closer and kicked your left leg up onto his lap and propped yourself up to watch his work, giving him a quick cheeky look of 'Well? Get to it!'

Lucifer took a few moments to look at the red heel that was connected to the gorgeous leg that now sat in his lap. Lucifer took a breath, and then with trembling hands worked to try undoing the clasp of the shoe. It took a little longer than it took you, but he eventually got the clasp undone and let the shoe slide off the bed to the ground. Lucifer took the opportunity to slowly slide one of his hands up your leg, up to the hem of your dress, and back down in admiration. Holy hell, her skin was so soft and beautiful.

You closed your eyes and hummed softly as you soaked in the sensation of his touch on your skin, "What a good boy you are, Lucifer." You cooed, removing your leg away from his reach. He looked sad for a moment, but it would not be for long. You hooked a leg over his body and got up onto the bed, now straddling his thighs.

A surprised breathy moan escaped Lucifer's lips as you moved onto his lap and he started to dig his claws into his sheets on either side of his body.

You chuckle again before you look down at him from your new position. You had never felt more power than you did right at that moment, and it was beautiful. Seeing the King of Hell under you, desperate for your next command or touch... now that was dangerous.

As Lucifer laid under you, defenseless and breathing heavily, he released his claws from the sheets and lightly picked up the edge of the skirt of your dress on either side of you and held them softly in his hands.

"M-may I?" he asked with pleading eyes, lifting the skirt up a little to show his intensions to remove your dress.

You cross your arms and put a finger up to your cheek in an action pretending to think about, making Lucifer wait.

"P-please?" he said after several seconds, sense of urgency in his voice.

You dropped the act and smirked down at him with a pleased smile and nodded. Lucifer excitedly, but carefully worked to pull the dress off of you and tossed it onto the ground to join your shoes. Lucifer now looked at you and you saw his eyes turn from soft desperation back into a deep animalistic hunger as they raked lustfully down the new view of your body.

You sat proud of yourself as you sat straddled across Lucifer's thighs wearing a deep sapphire blue lacy bra and a matching blue thong that, frankly, served no purpose other than to be something to be ripped off of you.

Lucifer softly ran his claws up your thighs, up your hips, across your abdomen, over your breasts, up your collar bone, other your shoulders, down your arms, and down you your hands, taking in every inch of your body that he could see in that moment. You tip your head back and allow long moan to escape you as his hands glide across your body, soft but electric and hot.

You tip your head back down to look at Lucifer, his hands in yours. You release his hands and start to slide you hands up his chest to his bowtie.

"Alright, baby, your turn," you coo, starting to undo his bowtie. Lucifer began to shake and breath heavily under your touch. You toss the bowtie to the ground, slowly undoing the first few buttons of his shirt, exposing his soft pale neck. You nuzzle your face into his neck and plant your first soft kiss on his neck.

Lucifer responds to the contact with a deep and long moan, he almost couldn't take any more of this torturous, slow teasing. And yet he also felt like he couldn't get enough of it. He felt energetic and alive for the first time in what felt like forever, it was pure bliss. He never wanted it to stop.

You giggle again at his response, and continue to unbutton the remaining buttons down his shirt. You lean down to look into Lucifer's eyes and say "Now Lucifer, I want you to tell me something."

He looks up at you with shiny, lust filled eyes, "Yes?"

"Tell me... what is it that you truly desire?" you say with a smirk, as you continue work on his buttons.

Lucifer thinks for a few seconds, thinking about all of the sexy, blissful ideas he wants to tell you and then... for some reason... he turns his head to the side of his bed... her side of the bed... all of the sound goes quiet, the room starts to go blurry, everything starts to shake, and then...

It all goes dark.

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He no longer feels like he is in his bedroom, its just him... and Lilith... looking at him with her bright smile, before the smile fades, and she turns to walk away into the darkness. Then it's Charlie... happily giggling on his lap, small, clapping at his stories, before Lilith picks her up off his lap and walks out of the room with her. It's his old workshop in heaven full of his wonderful dreams and creations, now a dark red room full of endless piles of ducks. It's giving the apple to Eve, then standing in an arena of the Heavenly Council, and then the deep long fall into hell, watching his hands pale hands turn to claws, watching the white feathers of his transform to turn a deep crimson, his halo shatter into space and long red horns grow in its place on his head before he crashes to the surface of a newly created Hell.

What does he desire? What does he TRULY DESIRE?! He wants back everything he has ever lost! He wants to know why everyone has cast him away and abandon him. He wants to know why everyone had to think his dreams were so fucking dangerous. He wants to remember what it was like to not hate himself so much!

Lucifer pulled at his hair and screamed into the void of his mind as he fell to his knees and cried.

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From your perspective, you ask your question, Lucifer's eyes go from full of life and lust to empty, his head tips to the side, and they start to fill with panic as he start to hyperventilate.

You drop your current persona and start to assess the situation. You quickly move off of Lucifer and go to his side instead.

"Lucifer?" No response. "Lucifer? Talk to me, what do you need?"

Something in your voice makes Lucifer snap back from his dissociative nightmare land, but he continues to hyperventilate.

'Fuck! Think! Didn't you learn something about this on earth? '

You think for a minute, shaking your hands as you look around the room, at him, trying to think. You softly take his hand and start gently rubbing the back of it with your thumb. Lucifer snaps to look at you, so quickly, it almost startles you.

"Hey," you say with the calmest and warmest smile you can muster, "I'm here, you are ok. You are safe here with me." Lucifer continues to look at you with panic in his eyes, but with recognition there too.

"I'm a friend, you are at your house, in your bed... in... hell. Uhh... you are in the Pride ring... Nothing is going to hurt you here, you are safe," you continue to say as you continue to rub the back of his had. If you had said half of that sentence back on Earth, it would have probably made things worse, but here... hopefully it would be more grounding.

Slowly, Lucifer breathing slows its pace and he looks around the room more. You look around the room and see a cup on a nearby table.

After waiting a few more minute, you ask, "Do you want any water?" Lucifer thinks for a briefly about your question, and nods his head.

You squeeze his hand and say "I will be right back." You set down his hand, go to grab the cup, and run to the bathroom to fill it with water. You come back to Lucifer's side and give him the cup, Lucifer slowly starts to drink some water as his breathing continues to slow down to a normal rate.

After a few more minutes, he shakes his head.

"Hey," he says in a defeated tone.

"Hey, how are you feeling?" you say in a gentle voice, giving him your full and concerned attention.

He sighs, "Not great..." He was so scared, sad, angry, disappointed, full of guilt, shame.

You tip your head down in shame, "I... I'm so sorry." Lucifer looks over at you with a confused look. "I was reckless and I hurt you. Can you ever forgive me, your Highness?" Now it was you that was starting to shake a little.

Lucifer sighs, the guilt coming to the front the most out of all his current emotions. How could he explain to you just how wrong you were? But he could understand why you would think that. In his current state, he could only partly process how differently you now tended to him, how you looked at him. Almost like, you cared? That you were worried about him?

He gently put a hand on your head "Please, Lucifer is still fine, and this was not your fault, it.... it's complicated. I... thought I was ready for something like this, I was hoping I was. A small baby-step to moving forward, but no..." Lucifer tightened his left hand. "I'm not"

You looked up and his tightened hand, and for to first time noticed the gold band on his ring finger. This was not the anger and sadness of a happily married man, or even an unhappily married man, this was something... much more complicated.

You sat with Lucifer in mournful silence for what felt little forever, but it was probably not more than a few minutes.

Eventually, Lucifer sighed and broke the silence, "You should go..."

You looked up at Lucifer, whose head still hung in shame, his hand gripped tightly.

"Are you sure?" you ask softly.

Lucifer shrugged, "I'm not going to be much fun now, I don't think I'm cut out for this. Not yet anyway. Its me not you, trust me. You were amazing... it was fun while it lasted" He looked up at you with a weak smile, "You should try to enjoy the rest of your night while you can. No use letting and old sod like ruin your night."

You look down at your dress and shoes still on the floor, you sigh, pick up your dress and put it back on. You pick up your shoes and start to head to the door. You put your hand on the doorknob, prepared to open it, wish the King goodbye, and walk away... but you don't. You stand there for a second.. thinking.

Lucifer noticed you pause, and looks up at you. You turn back to meet his gaze, his face decorated in a look of half confusion, half sadness.

"May I offer one last thought?" you ask with calm confidence.

Lucifer tips his head in curiosity, "What is it?"

You take a couple step back towards him, "I wonder... I think... you had the right idea with searching for intimacy, connection, but maybe we started in the wrong direction."

Lucifer cocks an eyebrow, giving you a puzzled look, "I'm... not sure I follow."

You search again for the right words, "I mean like... uhhh... well... ok, when was the last time you just got a hug, not like a quick one, like one that made you feel cared about?"

Lucifer's body stiffened, then looked down and curled his legs close to his body, "It... its been... a long time."

You smile, and take another step towards Lucifer, and you open up your arms to him with a soft smile.

Lucifer looked up at you and perked up for a minute. Was she serious? Why did she continue to try? Why didn't she leave him to his own misery? She didn't need to care about his feelings right now... and yet... she did.

Lucifer slowly started to slide out of his bed, shirt still most of the way unbuttoned, hair all a mess, and started to walk over to you. When there was only a few feet left between the two of you, Lucifer paused, and then practically ran the rest of the way into your arms and wrapped himself around your waist, as you return the embrace.

You stand there, hugging him for a minute, 2 minutes, 5 minutes, 10 minutes, and after the first few minutes, you feel Lucifer start to shake in your arms as he started to cry. Lucifer tightened his embrace around you the harder he cried, burying his face in your shoulder. At one point he tries to wail out an apology, but you just shush him and let him continue to cry as you rubbed his back.

After about a half hour of him crying in your embrace, you ask him if he wants to continue standing there or if he wants to sit down. In response, Lucifer releases his arms from you waist and reaches up to wrap his arms around you neck instead. You adjust and decide to just go for it and pick him up, carrying him over to his bed. You sit in his bed with him hugging you around your neck as you hold him in your lap.

Lucifer could not stop the tears that flowed from his face, he didn't remember the last time he had cried this much, cried this hard. And for some reason, in your arms, he didn't care. The tears felt good. Liberating.

You don't know how much time passes, but slowly his crying starts to get quieter and quieter, turning to sniffles, until you realize that the King of Hell had just fallen asleep in your arms.

You carefully move to get up at set him down in his bed without waking him up, and you tuck him into his bed. Before you leave the room, you quickly find a piece of paper and pen, and write out a quick note. You leave the note on his side table before grabbing your shoes, turning off the light, and giving him one last look before closing the door.

You make your way back down the long manor hallway, back to where the driver said he would be, and you let him know your visit was over. You grab your coat, put on your shoes, took one last look at the beautiful inside of the manor, and walked out to the car with the driver.

Who knows if you would be back here again, but it sure was interesting while it lasted.

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Chapter 3 is in the works! Let me know if you want added to a tag list <3

#lucifer hazbin hotel #lucifer morningstar #hazbin hotel lucifer #hazbin lucifer #lucifer x reader #lucifer smut #fanfic #fanfiction #fanfic writing #hazbin hotel #lucifer x y/n

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chanaleah · 2 months

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Since I was little kid, I remember my shul having police cars outside to protect us during high holy days, someone always monitoring the door, and security cameras showing all the entrances. After the Tree of Life shooting in Pittsburg, it heightened. My rabbi and cantor were once in the news after spending a day testifying against someone who had threatened to bomb our shul.

I was a bit older when I found out that churches don't have security. I was shocked. "So, you can just go in whenever you want? They don't even lock the doors?" I remember asking. The mom of a goyische friend of mine was equally shocked to discover that shuls do have security. "Why would they need security?" she asked me.

It was then that I realized that the amount of security we had - and every other shul had - was not the norm.

#jewish #chana talks #jumblr #judaism #antisemitism #hate crimes tw #bomb tw #shooting tw

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rea-grimm · 2 months

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Sleep protector Mihawk

You have suffered from nightmares since childhood. But you had a cure for that. After moving to college, the nightmares returned. If it was from a new school, new high and meaningless demands, or from a hostile cantor, you had no idea.

However, with each passing day, your sleep was getting worse and worse. This also affected your results in school and it created more stress. You got into a vicious circle from which there was no way back.

Well, you could certainly have finished school, but that didn't feel right. Especially after all the effort to get you there at all. Talent shows, tests, interviews... You were glad you got through it all. However, you had yet to learn how you would even make it through the exam period at this rate.

You finally got home for the holidays. Your family was quite shocked by your appearance. When you called them, you told them how good everything was. But now that they saw your giant circles under your eyes and your troubled expression, you had to come out with the truth.

However, your family understood you and wanted to support you as much as possible. You had to admit it was nice to be home again. Especially when you lay down in your old bed. It was like meeting an old friend.

That night you finally slept peacefully, without any nightmares. But despite that, you had the impression that you saw a pair of golden eyes in the dark shadows of your dreams, watching you every step of the way.

When you got out of bed in the morning, Mom had a surprise for you.

"Teddy bear?" you asked in amazement as she handed you a stuffed animal.

"That was your favourite stuffed animal, when you didn't have it, you didn't want to go to sleep. And you had nightmares without him," she replied happily.

You only vaguely remembered him. The teddy bear had a black dusty fur coat, a red and black coat, a large hat with feathers, a small gold cross around his neck and a sword on his back with golden eyes. His eyes were still shiny against his dirty fur. Despite all this, it makes you feel calm.

When you got back to your apartment, you started unpacking your things. However, as soon as you opened the suitcase, a teddy bear peeked out at you with a small note from your mom. She believed that it would bring you good sleep even now and good luck with it.

You were moved by the whole gesture, but you had to admit that the teddy bear was really dirty. You ended up putting it in the washing machine along with your clothes.

That night you dreamed about water. You walked through the harbour and saw all kinds of ships. Small and large in all sorts of strange shapes.

Here, too, you had the impression that someone's eyes were digging into your back. You turned around and saw him at the end of the pier. A man in the same outfit as your teddy bear. He even had the same hat.

But now he looked like a waterman because his clothes were completely soaked and water was still dripping from him. You felt quite sorry for him and so you decided to help him.

You had no idea where the towel in your hand came from, but at least you could dry him off. The golden-eyed man was grateful for the gesture.

You watched as he stripped down to just his pants and began to dry off. Meanwhile, you were holding his coat, shirt and hat, which had dried in your hands.

The man finally dried his hair and you had to admit that you liked his tousled look. After getting dressed, he followed you around the harbor. You felt like you were walking with a friend.

When your nightmares finally ended, troubles appeared elsewhere. A bunch of bullies appeared at school. They all avoided them in an arc and unfortunately for you, they chose you as their next target. Or you were in the wrong place at the wrong time.

You had just left the last lecture and wanted to take notes from the locker for the test that was coming up in a few days.

You spotted a group of them along the way when they tripped your leg and you fell. They took the opportunity to take your backpack and dump its contents on the ground next to your head while taunting you.

Notebooks, a pencil case, a few small things and a teddy bear fell out of your backpack. With horror in your eyes, you saw them take the teddy bear and start tossing it around. At the same time, they taunted you about how childish you are and what kind of ugly and twisted freak you are.

"Put him back!" you ran at him as you scrambled to your feet and grabbed the teddy bear's head. But it would be very easy if they just returned it to you. Instead, you tugged on them until you felt something give way.

Before you knew it, you ended up on the ground with the stuffed animal's head in your hands. The bullies laughed at you one more time before tearing the teddy bear apart and walking away laughing.

You collected his pieces and hid them in your bag. You then tried to sew it back together at home. However, no matter how hard you tried, it didn't go the way you wanted. You couldn't even wear it to bed anymore because you were afraid it would fall apart again.

Although you were no longer suffering from nightmares, you were starting to get the impression that you were seeing the man with the golden eyes from your dreams in the real world as well.

You saw him when you went to school in the morning, sitting on the concrete railing watching what was going on. You had the impression that your eyes met for a moment. But when you blinked, he was gone.

This is how you saw him several times and later in various places. At the markets where he was looking at fresh produce, across from the bus stop and the like. You had the impression that you saw those golden eyes in almost every corner.

You were lying quietly in bed, on the verge of being awake and asleep, when you heard a thump. You sat down and listened. You didn't hear anything else so you lay down again.

You were slowly falling asleep again when you heard footsteps slowly approaching you. You opened your eyes in panic as someone covered your mouth with a hand. Above you, you saw the figure of an unknown man. He put his other hand around your neck and started choking you.

You've never been so scared in your life. You tried to get out of his grip, but it was futile. You gasped for air that you couldn't get.

You slowly passed out as someone pulled him away from you. In the confusion, you briefly noticed the golden eyes. You were more focused on the feeling of air in your lungs.

Once you caught your breath, only then did you register the screams and pleas from the next room. You had no idea what was going on there, but you didn't like it at all. You curled up in the corner of the bed and chose the blanket you were covered with as cover.

The screaming stopped and nothing happened for a long time before you heard footsteps heading towards your bedroom again. You curled up more in the corner and you had the impression that this time it was someone else from the footsteps.

A man with golden eyes entered the room and sat on the bed next to you.

"Did he hurt you?" he asked, looking to see if you were injured.

“No,” you shocked your head, even though you could still feel his fingers on your throat. You gave him a hurt look before hugging him. You felt much safer in his arms.

“Thank you Mihawk,” you said and you felt him hug you too, caressing your back.

“I swear to always protect you from any danger. Both from nightmares and from the danger that can meet you here. I promise nothing will happen to you,” he said honestly as you finally calmed down enough to pull away slightly. He was holding your hand, which he then raised to his mouth and kissed you on it.

He let go of you and caressed your cheek before leaning into you slightly. But he was waiting for you. You completely put the criminal who wanted to hurt you out of your mind and you were completely absorbed by him. You closed your eyes and kissed him.

It was a short kiss, but full of such tenderness and feelings that it was the best kiss you've ever experienced.

Mihawk then got into bed with you and you automatically snuggled up to him. Now you weren't afraid to go back to sleep knowing that he was there for you and that he would protect you.

Sleep Protector Masterlist

Mihawk Masterlist

For @mihawksdemoness

#one piece #monster piece #sleep protector #one piece x reader #mihawk #dracule mihawk #mihawk x reader #sleep protector mihawk #teddy bear

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archangeldyke-all · 5 months

Note

Did someone say cowboy Sevika?

Absolutely delicious, I have thoughts.

Theres the classic off limits farmer’s daughter dynamic, which is to die for every time, but I thought what about a farmer’s widow? All lonesome on her big empty property, she hires Sevika for some extra help and then the tension is off the charts!! I think it would be ideal for a long, slow burn style fic. Draw it out, make them drool over each other for a bit til they can’t take it anymore

For a blurb idea what about Cowboy Sevika teaching the reader to ride a horse? It could be cute and flirty or it could get nasty lol whatever you’re in the mood to write!

Also let’s take a moment to imagine her tying those fancy cowboy knots. Rope steady in her big rough hands. She’s stripped down to her used to be white tank top, you can see her muscles flexing while she pulls it taught. She’d be all sweaty and you innocently walk over to her, pluck her bandanna out of her pocket, and dab away the droplets on her forehead. You tuck it gently back into the front pocket of her tight, dirt stained jeans and saunter away so sweetly. She’d want to chase you down like a wild animal in heat after that

the last paragraph here made me dizzy. thank u.

ur the second person to request a 'teaching reader how to ride horseback', mars, @sexysapphicshopowner , being the first! so lets do that ;)

part 1 of cowboy sev here, part 2 here!

men and minors dni

you're now the only one in your little mis-matched family who doesn't know how to ride horseback.

sevika's been riding since before she could even properly walk. powder took to it like a fish to water. violet was a little more hesitant, but figured it out in time. and now all three of them are trying to convince you to learn.

you've never needed it. you were born and raised in this town, everything you need is within a mile's walking distance. but, they're insistent.

you've ridden horseback before, clinging onto sevika as she controls shimmer's pace, but you've never been in control of the reigns. it seems scary, being that high up, going that fast, the only person keeping you from going flying off shimmer's back being yourself.

and now, sevika's got you in the stable, grinning at you as you hesitantly look at shimmer. powder and violet have been asleep for hours, exhausted after working in the garden all day with you.

"can we just go for a quick trot with you in front?" you ask, pouting at your wife. she laughs. "just so i can see you do it!" you insist. she rolls her eyes, then lifts you up by the waist, helping you straddle shimmer's back, before hopping up in front of you.

you press your grin against her shoulder, quickly wrapping your arms around her waist. she laughs in front of you, giving shimmer a little tap with her spur, the mare slowly trotting out onto the main street.

"you're such a baby." sevika teases. you pinch her side, watching her wiggle.

"i'm just lucky. got a wife who knows how to ride so i never had to learn." you say. you can't see her smile, but you can tell she's grinning in front of you.

sevika slowly walks shimmer down the main street, picking her pace up to a cantor when you get out of town.

the three of you ride out into the desert, and you tilt your head up to soak in the sight of the stars above, sighing as the wind whips past you.

"you're not even lookin' at what i'm doing." sevika laughs ahead of you. you giggle.

"stars 're so pretty sev. look." you say.

sevika brings shimmer to a stop, tilting her head up to look at the stars with you.

"hm." she says. you squeeze her waist.

"what?" you ask, enjoying the heat of her back pressed against your front.

"they're pretty, i guess. nowhere near 's pretty as you." she says. you grin.

"sap." you say.

it's summer, but this late at night, the desert is chilly. you sneak your cold fingers up under sevika's shirt, watching her jump, then giggling when she elbows you. you don't move your hands. she doesn't ask you to.

for a few minutes, the two of you just stare at the sky, the vast expanse of stars and planets before your eyes.

it's a new moon, and without her shine, all the stars in the galaxy are visible.

shimmer shifts beneath you, and sevika laughs.

"she hates waitin' around." she says. you smile.

"just like you." you say. sevika laughs, nudging shimmer's side, letting her trot around the empty expanse of the desert.

you hook your chin over her shoulder, watching how her hands hold the reins, how she uses them to gently guide shimmer to and fro.

beneath your fingers, you can feel her belly rise and fall with each breath she takes. a smile ticks up at the corner of your mouth, and you turn your head to press a kiss to sevika's neck.

she goes stiff in your arms.

"what're you doin'?" she asks. you smile against her throat.

"'m watchin' you." you say. "learnin' how to ride."

"you don't need any help learning how to ride." sevika says. you laugh at her horrible joke, pinching her waist. she chuckles.

"speaking of..." you start. sevika snorts in front of you.

"yeah, darlin'?" she asks. you nip her neck.

as much as you both love powder and violet, their abrupt entrance into your lives has left your sex life in shambles.

it's not like you're not having sex. it's just that you can't have it like you used to.

when you used to spend any spare moment the two of you had sprawled out in bed, naked and sweaty and kissing, now you gotta keep your romps quick, lest the girls get in trouble while they're unsupervised.

plus, with the nightmares that violet's been having, paired with powder's separation anxiety toward her sister, a majority of your nights as of late have ended with the four of you piled up in your-- used to be-- marital bed.

you've just had to get a little more creative. you and sevika have been doing a whole lot of 'chores' in the stable, trying to avoid shimmer's judgmental eyes as you fuck against the haybales.

and now... out in the desert, with sevika pressed against you and nobody out here beside you, your wife, and the stars... now seems like the perfect opportunity to get creative.

slowly, you inch your hands down sevika's abdomen, taking a moment to admire the firmness of her rippling abs shifting with each step shimmer takes. she chuckles huskily in front of you, and you begin sucking a hickey against her neck.

"insatiable." she says. "'y had me this morning while we were 'pinning the laundry to dry'." you hum.

"want me to stop?" you ask. she laughs out loud, a bright, echoing thing.

"hell no." she says. you grin, and continue trailing your fingers lower, fiddling with the button of her chaps.

shimmer continues her aimless trot, slowing occasionally to munch at spare patches of grass, knowing that you and sevika are in no rush to get anywhere.

when you slide your hand down her pants, she sighs, leaning some of her weight back against your chest. you pepper kisses against the side of her face, trying to give every branch of the scar on her left cheek a solid smooch. she giggles against you, then moans when your fingers start working against her clit.

"you're wet already." you mumble against her. she hums.

"knew this is what you were workin' up to the second you asked me to ride in front first." she says. you chuckle. "i'm never gonna get you to learn to ride, am i?" she asks.

"mmm, maybe someday. don't need it now, though, do i?" you ask. "not when i've got you." you say.

sevika sighs and turns her head to capture your lips in a kiss against hers. you hum against her mouth, nipping her lip as you start rubbing her clit in slow circles.

"fuck." she sighs, turning her neck back around to watch where shimmer's going. "i love you." she whispers. you smile and nip her neck.

"love you too." you say, trailing your free hand up her chest to fondle her breasts.

sevika's tits are sensitive, you've made her cum from your hands and mouth on her chest countless times before. she shudders against you, her back arching as she shoves her chest further against your hand. you snicker, and start to gently fiddle with her nipple.

"fuck-- your hands." she says.

"'s kinda what you're doin' now, baby." you tease. sevika snorts, but it quickly dissolves into a moan as you increase your pace on her clit, sinking your teeth into her neck as you pinch her nipple.

"y-you're horrible." she chastises you for the joke. you giggle against her.

"you close?" you ask. she laughs.

"yeah." she says.

shimmer lets out a sneeze-- clearly disapproving of the activities happening on her back, and you giggle.

"she's sick of us." you say. sevika sighs.

"she, fuck, she's so judgmental." sevika whimpers.

"should be gettin' back soon. 's almost midnight-- violet's gonna have her nightmare soon, we should be there when the girls come lookin' for us.' you say.

"fuck, can we please not talk about the kids while you got your hand on my cunt?" she asks. despite her complaints, sevika tugs on shimmer's reins, turning her back toward town as you work your hand against her.

"y' better hurry up. we're only a few minutes away from town." you say. sevika groans. "need some encouragement?" you whisper against her ear. she shivers, and you smirk.

"shut up." she whispers. you grin, knowing that sevika's 'shut up's tend to mean 'keep talking.' especially in the bedroom.

"you sure? y' don't want me to tell me how much i love you? how perfect you are for me?" you tease. sevika's thigh shakes against shimmer.

"fuck."

"my cowboy. my wife. so strong and handsome, givin' up her life of crime just for me. gotta compensate that kinda sacrifice properly, don't i?" you ask. sevika whines. "fuck, 'n you look so good when you're on shimmer's back. why would i wanna learn to ride when i could just watch you instead, hm?" you ask.

sevika lets go of the reins with one hand to grip onto your arm. you kiss her cheek.

"cum for me, pretty thing. if you're lucky, maybe i'll wake you up before sunrise to help me 'feed the chickens.'" you say. sevika whines, remembering the last time the two of you used that excuse-- you ended up with sevika's tongue inside of you, your back against the coop as she knelt on the shitty ground, clawing at your thighs. "c'mon sev-- give it to me, baby."

sevika cums with a resounding "shit!" shimmer spooks a bit, jumping and bucking beneath you, and you both squeal as you hold on to the mare while she calms down.

sevika's cunt is still fluttering beneath your palm as she pulls on shimmer's reins to bring her back to a walk as the shimmering lights of town become visible ahead. you hum against her, ducking your fingers down to gather her cum from her dripping hole, before pulling your hand out of her pants and popping your fingers in your mouth.

you moan. sevika moans. shimmer grunts, a disgusted little noise.

"fuck." sevika sighs out, her back slumping against your chest. you giggle, removing your hand from her tits to button up her pants, before giving her cunt a little pat over her chaps. she jolts. "hey!" she says, giggling. you grin against her neck, pressing another kiss to the skin beneath your lips.

just before shimmer starts down main street, sevika pulls her to a stop with a "woah, girl."

you're about to ask her what she's doing-- the tavern about two hundred feet away, but sevika answers your question before you can get it out when she turns her head, grabbing your chin with her fingers and smashing your lips together.

you sigh against her mouth, nipping on her tongue when she swipes it against your lips, giggling at the little involuntary twitch of her thigh.

she pulls away with a sigh, looking into your eyes dreamily.

"i love you more than there are stars in the sky, darlin'." she says. you smile against her lips.

"i love you too, my sweet wife." you say, reaching forward to snap shimmer's reins, letting the horse lead the two of you back home. sevika raises an eyebrow at you and you smile. "see, i did learn a little somethin'." you say.

sevika laughs.

"guess i gotta take you out for ridin' lessons every night, huh?" she asks. you grin.

"i wouldn't mind that at all."

taglist!

@lesbeaniegreenie @fyeahnix @sapphicsgirl @half-of-a-gay @ellabslut @thesevi0lentdelights @sexysapphicshopowner @shimtarofstupidity @love-sugarr @chuucanchuucan @222danielaa @badbye666 @femme-historian @lia-winther @gr0ssz0mbi3 @ellsss @sevikaspillowprincess @leomatsuzaki

#i know nothing about horses so have some smut hahaha #sevika #sevika imagine #sevika arcane #sevika x reader #sevika x you #soft sevika #sevika smut

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ambi-kiko · 7 months

Text

tma music tma music tma music

please reblog with your own! i need it (:

also im more than willing to elaborate on any of em, just ask! (i have much to yell about)

for bitchard, we have:

kiss me, son of god (they might be giants)

i'm gonna win (rob cantor)

blood & money (the orion experience, orion, linda XO)

ruler of everything (tally hall)

BlackBoxWarrior - OKULTRA (will wood)

community gardens (the scary jokes, louie zong)

the main character (will wood)

your body, my temple (will wood)

laplace's angel (hurt people? hurt people!) (will wood)

saint bernard (lincoln)

welcome to the internet (bo burnham)

all eyes on me (or3o)

my ordinary life (the living tombstone)

cabinet man (lemon demon)

peter x elias (for my frenchies out there <33)

marine marchande (les cowboys fringants)

ok dont judge me too much i had to have smth for them ((: plus its not that unrelated

next! martin

a better son/daughter (rilo kiley)

12 feet deep (the front bottoms)

things to do (alex g)

be nice to me (the front bottoms)

step on me (the cardigans)

heart for brains (roar)

mama (my chemical romance)

summer child (conan gray)

hello my old heart (the oh hellos)

i cant handle change (roar)

against the kitchen floor (will wood)

least favorite only child (leanna firestone)

sharpener (cavetown)

empty bed (cavetown)

life's a beach (bears in trees)

jmart ((:

no children (the mountain goats)

the moon will sing (the crane wives)

euthanasia (will wood)

as the world caves in (matt maltese)

the truth (the front bottoms)

balade à toronto (jean leloup)

doctor (jack stauber)

apocalypse (cigarettes after sex)

talk to you (ricky Montgomery)

cabo (ricky montgomery)

meteor shower (cavetown)

juliet (cavetown)

feel better (penelope scott)

would you be so kind (dodie)

two birds (regina spektor)

line without a hook (ricky Montgomery)

and jon, ofc <3 i rly dont have enough for him ):

body terror song (AJJ)

downhill (Lincoln)

montreal (penelope scott)

ramblings of a lunatic (bears in trees)

its called: freefall (rainbow kitten surprise)

chin music for the unsuspecting hero (foster the people)

love, me normally (will wood)

dinner is not over (jack stauber's micropop)

also melanie! dont have that many but she deserves the mention (:

saturn suv (fredo disco)

brave as a noun (AJJ)

tongues & teeth (the crane wives)

wreaking ball (mother mother)

we fell in love in october (girl in red)

and just random songs with tma vibes (other characters, ships, dread powers, etc)

underground (cody fry)

hand me my shovel, i'm going in! (will wood)

terry's taxidermy (teddy hyde)

cotard's solution (will wood and the tapeworms)

amnesia was her name (lemon demon)

memento mori: the most important thing in life is death (will wood)

skeleton appreciation day in vestal, n.y. (will wood)

icicles (the scary jokes)

puppet boy (devo)

oh ana (mother mother)

i dont smoke (mitski)

choke (I DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME)

thermodynamic lawyer esq, G.F.D (will wood and the tapeworms)

sorry haha i fell asleep (egg)

despair (leo)

stuff is way (they might be giants)

baby teeth (baby bugs)

king park (la dispute)

i/me/myself (will wood)

dr. sunshine is dead (will wood and the tapeworms)

amygdala's rag doll (ghost and pals)

little pistol (mother mother)

burning pile (mother mother)

this is home (cavetown)

body (mother mother)

turn the lights off (tally hall)

like real people do (hozier)

im going insane

#long post #tma #the magnus archives #jonathan sims #magnuspod #jon sims #jmart #martin blackwood #martin kartin blackwood #jonmartin #jonny sims #melanie king #elias bouchard #lonely eyes

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keshetchai · 4 months

Note

Greetings Friend,

I hope you can help me

How did you go about learning Hebrew? As in what resources, classes, books etc. did you use to get a handle on the language?

I really struggle with languages, so I was hoping you had some advice or tips.

As a bit of background, I am currently a conversion student, going on almost 2.5 years now. I have long since completed the formal learning requirement with my synagogue (conservative) and according to my rabbis, I am free to attend the Beit Din and Mikvah whenever I so choose.

I know my neshama is Jewish, I know this is who I am/supposed to be. I know because of some unusual childhood experiences, and then when I started converting most aspects of the learning and practices came so naturally (granted nowhere near an orthodox level of observance, which isn’t necessarily the goal at this time, but certainly not something I am opposed to perusing) except for the languages.

As previously stated my rabbis say it is okay but something is holding me back from taking that final plunge (lol), and I believe it’s the language.

I still bench in English, and find it really stressful to attend services because I can barely muddle my way around the liturgy, or songs during a Shabbat dinner.

Of course this is just a personal hang up, and absolutely no criticism or shame on anyone else who converted without knowing/knowing very little of the language. Just, for some reason it just doesn’t feel right. I cannot bring myself to say I am actually a member of this wonderful, beautiful tribe before I have overcome this hurdle.

So… any advice?

A few answers for you, the first is most important:

Very Early On in my studying, one of the two rabbis at my synagogue wasn't leading and so she sat in the back, and I decided to sit next to her because i was still finding my footing in the basic service.

And at one point, it may have been for mi hamocha, the cantor starts with a NEW tune I don't know, and I'm still relying on the transliteration entirely and was still trying to memorize the FIRST tune.

And my rabbi leans over and whispers to me: "I have never heard this tune before in my life either."

And the anxiety broke, then. I didn't know this version for the song already and I was lost. But the rabbi sitting next to me also didn't know this tune.

Being Jewish is about always learning something new, even if you are encountering the same thing you've seen or done before dozens or hundreds of times. THAT is being Jewish. Rereading the same book every year and the same passages over and over, but still being a little lost or even finding something you never knew before?

That is being a Jew.

Jews may open a siddur and know what they'll find there, but we do not open it and expect to know everything about how that material is used or applied. And we don't feel a guarantee that life will not teach us something new today, or that someone's minhag won't be totally different from ours. Jews may know the Torah, they may even choose to memorize the mitzvot by heart, but we don't expect this memorization will ensure we never have a halakhic question in life!

So you see, the big scary fact is this: you might become a fluent reader of prayer book Hebrew, you might someday daven entirely in Hebrew, or even graduate rabbinical school, but still sometimes be thrown into being a stranger to something, even something you thought you knew.

But when you identify this and then embrace it, it becomes less scary and part of your Jewish identity. Being perfectly settled, fixed in your knowledge or your thinking or your skills — it honestly doesn't feel terribly Jewish to me.

And for many people born as Jews this can manifest as a type of reflexive embarrassment or self-consciousness for failing at jewishness somehow or having less knowledge for one reason or another. It can make folks defensive or ashamed or feel frustrated for the disconnect. I'm here to tell you that as converts we get the chance to illustrate joyfully that no Jew knows everything Jewish, and that is the experience of being Jewish. The biggest thing holding any of us back from learning the things we don't know is

a) being afraid to seem not Jewish enough or

b) being afraid to not know something

I have excellent news for your (and my) anxiety:

A) almost all Jews worry about how Jewish they seem in some fashion or another so that's normal and,

B) since only hashem knows everything, our job is to not know everything, but to be willing to learn anything. Also we're better in numbers! Two heads are better than one and a minyan is better than that! Everyone doesn't know something, but none of us are alone as Jews. Which is why we become Jewish in community, and not alone. Because someone else might know what we don't!

Get it?

Step #1: you have to jump feet first into not already knowing something perfectly and start knowing less but learning more.

If you are reading the English words and English translations to daven, this means you need to stop. This was your training wheel. And you are not finding your own balance relying on it.

If your siddur has transliterations of the hebrew, bring a little index card next time and cover up the English as you daven for a start. I familiarized myself with the Hebrew because I was saying everything in Hebrew out loud every single time. Once you know the shema by heart more or less (for example), all you have to do is learn the alphabet to prompt your memory to progress further in your Hebrew learning.

That's how kids learn any language. We speak before reading as children. So speak and chant and sing in Hebrew. Whisper the Hebrew. As you get more comfortable, learning to read Hebrew will be an exercise you can even do during the middle of shabbat.

Because you know what the prayer says, and you just need to match the words you see to the sounds you know.

Step #2: know the aleph bet before you attempt reading comprehension of all words.

Things that I used to learn the aleph bet:

Hebrew scripts (the app by drops)

Write it! Hebrew app

Victoria Hanna's The Aleph Bet Song (Hosha'na) because uh she sings the aleph bet and pronounces it

Behrman House Books: Hineni: prayerbook Hebrew for adults; aleph isn't tough! For adults. The kids stuff is good too, I'm not ashamed to say I own "time to read Hebrew!" 1&2

(The Hebrew by inbal on Amazon looks new but good possibly?)

If you want a siddur set up specifically to practice matching transliteration and Hebrew aleph bet, I recommend Chayim Alevsky's My Siddur (choose the minhag variant you use! I bought the Sephardic/Israeli as I don't use ashkie pronunciations.

There will be slight differences of you're used to liberal inclusion of say, the matriarchs, but in general this is a solid practice book for anyone. Transliteration is given word by word, with full word blocks reading in the same direction as Hebrew. At the bottom of the page certain (possibly newer to the learner) words will be defined.

It also now has an app which looks like this:

So you see this is pairing the reading direction of Hebrew words with the sounds spelled out in English to strengthen your Hebrew. If you try to read the transliteration in the English direction word by word, you'll be reading it backwards and starting with v'kayahm, instead of "modeh" (or "modah" feminine). Further even if you're starting correctly with modeh, the English word is still left to right over the Hebrew right to left. so this forces you to be attentive to the Hebrew itself and slow down word by word!

The layout in the print versions means you can cover up the transliteration to test your learning of certain words, and only check if you forget.

I still am not perfect at everything and I truthfully attentively practice Chinese far more than Hebrew reading, but this is what helped me.

Good luck!

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traegorn · 4 months

Note

you never read the lilith question from the first edition of lilith magazine you twisted presumptuous fraud and antisemite

So I'm probably giving you more attention than you deserve, but I also hate leaving someone who keeps repeatedly shouting something at me that's so wrong uncorrected.

You brought this up back in September (yes, this has been going on for that long), and at the time I hadn't read it so I assumed it supported your argument. I gave you the benefit of the doubt and trusted that it said what you said.

But here's the thing, I've since read it.

And it doesn't support what you're saying at all.

(Putting the rest under a cut since this gets long...)

So going to the actual piece we have to remember what "Lilith Magazine" is. It's a Jewish Feminist magazine writing primarily for a Jewish audience. Cantor-Zuckoff is talking about how Jewish women may want to look at her story differently. I don't find anything in there arguing for Lilith to be some pan-feminist icon for non-Jewish people. In fact, in the article Cantor-Zuckoff says:

What we have to explore are the uniquely Jewish aspects of the Lilith story, and how they relate to the Jewish experience, to Jewish history. After all, Jews lived among many different peoples and were subject to a bombardment of cultural and religious concepts and myths from all sides. What they accepted is important because it shows us what Jews perceived as necessary and appropriate to Jewish life and its continuity. How they transmuted what they accepted is also significant for this reason. The account of Lilith’s revolt in the Alphabet is, to the best of my knowledge, intrinsically Jewish; no non-Jewish source tells of a female struggle for equality or gives it as a reason for the vengeful behavior of a female demon. This is especially important to us in exploring how the Lilith myth connects with our unique history.

The only comments about universality in the piece are when Cantor-Zuckoff says that there are stories with some similarities in other cultures just prior to those last two paragraphs:

These legends of Lilith-as-demon, the vengeful female witch, are, of course, not unique to Jewish culture and tradition. Many scholars theorize that vengeful female deities or demons, like the Greek hecatae, represent the vestiges of the dying Matriarchy or are an attempt by men to discredit the Matriarchy.

What Cantor-Zuckoff is arguing here is that there are myths in other cultures that have been influenced by patriarchy and serve some similar functions. This is not an argument for other people using Lilith, only that there are elements she shares. To claim they're the same though is bizarre, as you wouldn't claim that, say, Kinich Ahau and Helios are the same god just because they're both associated with the sun.

I think this really goes back to the fact that you've started with a conclusion and just reject anything that contradicts it. You really want it to be true. What I have said from the start is that Lilith is a figure who is unique to Jewish folklore. I backed this up with with the evidence we find in the historical record. I debunked the supposed "non-Jewish Lilith" sources.

And I said listen to Jewish people about what's okay or not okay to use from their culture, as they are a closed ethnoreligion, and not listening to them would make someone an asshole. You've been having a bizarre tantrum at me for like half a year now, and it's getting sad.

I don't know why you seem to care that I, a random person you will never meet, thinks you're being an asshole, but this has to stop.

(Context Note: For anyone who is seeing this post first in this ongoing "conversation" -- this anon has been harassing me for months because I dared say in my podcast that Lilith is a figure who comes exclusively from Jewish folklore, and that members of the Modern Witchcraft Movement should listen to Jewish people when they ask us not to appropriate her. That's right -- my saying "listen to Jewish people" is apparently an antisemitic act.)

#witchblr #witch #witchcraft #lilith

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frances-baby-houseman · 1 month

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Something that has been stressing me out UNBELIEVABLY, like wakes me up in the middle of the night, cannot stop thinking about it, freaking out on the regular, is that we have to join a synagogue by September. Alice HAS to start religious school-- bat mitzvah prep starts in third grade!!

For awhile we went to adam's dad's congregation in Northfield, but they had a bad cantor transition and that combined with COVID meant we fully stopped going after being pretty engaged members for 5ish years. We don't want to go back there, but where!?

We tried a VERY FANCY congregation in the fall, bc Joe's friend's family goes there and it's close to our house, but I did not get the right feeling there. They did not do the right tune for Kol Nidre! And also we learned that adam's cousin bedbugs goes there and I'm sorry I have such a complex about her, our girls are the same age and love each other which is great, cousins should love each other, but I cannot handle being in the same bat mitzvah class!! We are not hedge funge mengeaners!! So that was out. But where?!?!?!?

I was literally crying and crying about this yesterday to both Adam and my work bestie bc you're just supposed to go where your family goes!!! But adam's family abandoned us!!

And then! This morning! In my canasta group we have a side chat for the jewish girls so we can share jewish events, and one of the women texted us an event at a local temple for next week and I was like, OMG YES TELL ME MORE WE ARE SYNAGOGUE SHOPPING! And two of the other women are also, and we were like, let's do this together! so one of them gave us the rundown on everywhere, and she actually said our best bet was probably the congregation that Adam's aunt and uncle go to! They love it and I've been a few times and didn't love it, but they've since merged with another congregation and have a really good reputation. So we're going to try it out, and another temple down the street from my house that's having a yom ha atzmaut party next week.

Look at that! Look at hashem giving me a little life boat! And maybe I will join with my new friends!!

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louisupdates · 27 days

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LOUIS TOMLINSON SHOWS THAT NOTHING HAS CHANGED AMONG FANS AND CLOSES BRAZILIAN TOUR IN CURITIBA

“Even when the night changes, it won’t change you and me.” With this verse from “Night Changes”, by One Direction, Louis Tomlinson shows that nothing has changed among Brazilian fans, who sang the singer's songs and two hits from his original group loud and clear at the Ligga Arena, in Curitiba, on the evening of Sunday, May 12th.

The presentation closed the “Faith in the Future” tour in Brazil, which began in Rio de Janeiro, on the 8th, and passed through São Paulo, on the 11th. The opening show was performed by the German band Giant Rooks, and soon Furthermore, at 8:05 pm, a total blackout started Louis' performance. Already in the first verses of “The Greatest” the fans’ love for the Brit was clear, as they sang along to all the songs in the show, focusing mainly on the artist’s solo songs.

After achieving resounding success with the group One Direction, Louis embarked on a solo career after the group's hiatus in 2016. The first album came in 2020, “Walls”, followed by “Faith in the Future”, in 2022. That's the job which he always wanted to do, without worrying about commercial success – and this becomes clear during the show. His personality on stage is calmer, more restrained, with few interactions – or, we could say, interactions in his own way. Instead of long conversations between songs, he walks through the setlist song after song – the first talk to the audience came only after three songs. But clearly, he was always very grateful. “I wouldn't be able to do these incredible shows if it weren't for the support of incredible people like you, so thank you very much,” said the artist.

He also took the opportunity to thank everyone for their support in Rio Grande do Sul – the singer's shows in Brazil were a collection point for donations. Only then did he follow up with “Face the Music”, which the audience followed in chorus. In the middle of the songs, Louis seemed to pay close attention to the fans, pointing, waving. But he left much more for the music to do the talking.

It didn't take long for One Direction's first hit to hit the scene – “Night Changes”, in a different version, in the style of Louis. But he soon returned to the solo album with “Chicago,” followed by a cover of Post Malone’s “Chemical.” He intersperses more melodic and calm songs with intense hits like “Written All Over Your Face”, which sets an energizing tone throughout the show.

For the “encore”, he came with three songs – “Saturdays”, “Where Do Broken Hearts Go” – the second and last One Direction song that is part of the setlist – followed by “Silver Tongues”, which closes with a key of gold the presentation. He even took the opportunity to get off the stage and get close to the audience – and interacted with a fan who carried a sign indicating that she was “blind, but her voice changed my life”. He hugged her and stood close so the fan could feel the artist.

Louis Tomlinson, 32 years old, appears mature and authentic – ready to spend many more years in his solo career alongside his longtime fans. Until next time, Louis!

[Translated from Portuguese]

#louis press #louis tomlinson #fitfwt24: curitiba #12.5.2024 #Louis review

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is-the-fire-real · 4 months

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judío por elección (part 2)

(part 1.)

My wife and I started searching for a community after a lot of talking. But, technically, we were already looking.

After E died, S gave us charge over a specific set of books. He had told her that it was vital these books go to a synagogue. He preferred it to be a London synagogue. We had no clue which one.

Shoved in with all the different books he had, and we inherited, was ephemera from different synagogues--pamphlets from the 1980s and 1990s, booklets from the '40s and '50s. We started calling and emailing them about these books, because they were pretty important.

They're chumash with a publication date of 1898.

Problem was, we couldn't get any synagogues to respond. The one who finally did said that they had too many books and could not accept any more. They suggested that E might still be honored if the chumash went to a Spanish synagogue.

The community here, as you can imagine, is struggling. Spain has done a real good job at keeping Jews out since the expulsion of 1492. Most groups operate in half-secret: no website, or a website that hasn't been updated in years; no phone numbers. Half of the people we tried to contact never responded. Most of the rest couldn't support our conversion.

One rabbi from Madrid answered us. She made it clear that we'd have to move if we wanted to attend her group. This was expected and crushing. We're poor, disabled, and pretty well stuck where we are. But then she said that there was a brand-new community in a city closer to us, one we visit with some frequency. She introduced us to their leader.

I have the impression that A would be considered a cantor. He is not a rabbi, but he can lead services. He had a few questions about my wife and I's histories and experiences with Judaism. (Those experiences I'll talk about somewhat, but it's difficult to talk about meaningfully while also maintaining privacy, so it'll have to wait.) He wanted to know if and what we were reading. Then he invited us to Shabbat, which they conduct through videocalls.

This group does not have a rabbi, much less a synagogue. Several of the folks who call in for our Shabbat meeting live in a different city entirely. That person talks about experiences with Mossad. I want to get better at Spanish so that I can learn from her.

There's singing (as someone who's seen Ashkenazi services, the Sephardi tradition sounds amazing), of course, and because there's so few of us, A has my wife and I read sometimes for services. The very first thing I got to read was Psalm 23, which has always been one of my favorite works of art... which A couldn't know when he asked me to read it.

I said I'd stumble at lot. He told me to read it slowly in Spanish, that it's better to read slow and correctly than quickly and clumsily. He seemed pleased with my effort.

I was raised Mormon, and the entire approach to worship was very different, in a way I found appealing. My wife said it wasn't that different for them--they were raised mainstream Protestant, so singing and standing/sitting a lot were normal for them.

When we were asked to raise a glass of alcohol, we asked if it had to be wine. (We're bad Spaniards. Neither of us likes the stuff.) A said that as long as it was fermented, it was fine. One attendant had a gin and tonic.

The last time we celebrated Shabbat, we used gay-pride themed glasses and filled them with beer. "¿Qué tenéis?" we were asked.

"¡Cerveza!", which cracked them all up, and the ex-Mossad member talked about how the Orthodox she used to worship with would drink whiskey.

Setting aside the Shabbat has been, overall, easier than I thought it would be. I check HebCal to make sure when the candles should be lit. I do all my household chores throughout Thursday and Friday-daytime. My wife tries to cook as much as possible before the candles are lit, and we eat, talk, and do our video-call service with the community.

Saturday I set aside. I have to keep reminding myself not to work, to consider things done even if they look like they're not.

But onward.

Our little community is fantastic, particularly A. He found out I'm having problems with some of my IDs. He told us not to worry. He knows a lot of people who work immigration and he can help us go to the right office and navigate the Spanish bureaucracy. ("Byzantine" should be replaced with "Spanish".) He's answered all our questions and invited us to events about the Shoah and personally introduced us to people.

They were so welcoming, so open, so not-rejecting-us-three-times (but if you count all the rabbis who told us no, technically, that's more than three) that it shocked my wife and I. We talked beforehand about how the community might want to withdraw, and not trust new converts, given October 7. We found the opposite. Our local Jews seem to feel that our willingness to look at how the world is behaving right now and still say "Your people will be my people" demonstrates our sincerity in and of itself.

On the other hand, when we first met A in person, my wife made a comment regarding his personal safety. He admitted that there was a man in the room with us who's his armed bodyguard. He and his wife do not leave home on business related to the community without their bodyguard.

My wife felt a cold hand creep up their back when they heard that. I was not nearby--I was checking all the exits of the auditorium and calculating where we'd need to sit if we had to flee. There were "pro-Palestinian" protests going on that day and the odds were there wouldn't be any danger near us, but... but...

Several of A's family members are also converting. We will have to travel halfway across the country to a mikveh. There are many medieval mikvehs in Spain, but to my knowledge, there are only two which are actually in use. My wife says we'll have to do a road trip. I immediately think about how "one Sephardi and four converts go road tripping across a country where one of its favorite dishes was designed as a Fuck You to Jews and Muslims" would be a fucking great novel.

Would be? Will be. And completing this branch of the journey with a journey feels right.

Oh, and my favorite A story: he invited us to spend some time with him and his wife after a community meal. We agreed to attend the meal, but had to leave after. "We have a lot of dogs and cats," my wife said, "we have to return and care for them."

"We'd love to have you," he said, "but it's a mitzvah, taking care of animals. Do that instead."

Afterward, my wife stared at me in wonderment and said: "I don't think I ever heard that once in church."

#judaism #jewish conversion #jew by choice #jew in progress #jewish convert #jumblr #spain #sephardim #is-the-fire-real original

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katiestardoodles · 11 months

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So since I accidentally deleted my blog I lost the actually good fanfic I wrote of Ernesto de la Cruz qwq

Thankfully I still have it on my notes app so once again I hope y’all enjoy my simple cringe 🤍

“Marry you?!” Yn gapped in shock at the request of the skeleton, on his knees before her with a blood red ring in his boney fingers, having stopped a whole concert, one yn was asked to dance in just for this reason, Ernesto never did anything without a good reason or ulterior motive.

“Si Mi hermosa mariposa, you’ve blessed the land of the dead with your beauty and I’d be honored to have the most beautiful of butterflies as mine”

There was the tiniest twinge in his tone, like the living was testing his patience the longer it took her to answer.

Looking between him and the excited crowd it felt like time slowed down around her, would it be a good idea? Wed someone who was basically a king in this world?

But what of her family and the land of the living? And what would happen to her if she stayed here any longer? Would she become a skeleton too?

In a split second decision she ran off past the musician and other dancers, ignoring the shocked gasps and calls to her.

No there was no way! As tempting as it was she couldn’t stay, she had to go home-

He promised her he’d help her get home after she danced in his concert after all.

Running through the backstage halls she could hear Ernesto giving orders to catch her, he still had that charming tone as he called to her, swearing he wasn’t angry and they could talk things over but she had none of it, ducking into one of the dressing rooms and locking the door praying she could find a way back home.

Searching through closets and drawers for something, maybe some kind of shortcut back to the flower bridge?

The sound of knocking took her out of her thoughts and his voice rang through the door

“Now mi vida-“

She could hear him clutching the doorknob like he wanted to tear the door off it’s hinges, the sickly sweet tone hiding rage making her heart race, not sure if she was scared or excited by the tone

“I know I surprised you but there’s no reason to run off like that, I thought you’d like a public proposal!”

Panicked she looked around for something, maybe something she could hit him with but couldn’t find anything, she backed up towards the wall to get as far from the door as much as she could as he continued, the sweet tone in his voice slowly disappearing though clearly trying to hide his real feelings over being embarrassed by the living in front of the audience.

“Ay Mi pájaro cantor encantador.. if you come out we can talk this over, I could give you everything you’ve ever wanted!”

Yn huffed trying not to let the angry tone and sweet promises get to her, glaring at the door

“Y.. You promised you’d help me go home! You said nothing about a proposal!” She managed to get out despite her nerves.

While backing up she found herself against a window and got an idea.

While the lying musician went on she started tearing up clothes and tying them together to make a rope she could climb down, ignoring the banging and knocking on the door

“You’re being VERY unreasonable mi vida! If you come out now I’ll forgive you for making a fool of me out there!”

“It serves you right for pushing that on me outta no where you selfish entitled prince!” She shouted back, surprised when she didn’t hear him reply, only faint whispers and then footsteps that faded away, that was.. out of character for him…

A part of her wondered if he was up to something but shook the thought away and focused on climbing out the window, tossing the end of her makeshift rope made of sparkling clothes out the window and tying the other end to a dresser to keep it still while she climbed down.

Just as she had climbed onto the windowsill and about to repel down she noticed a few boney figures down below her, several skeletal guards and the smug man himself who looked very proud, smiling up her

“I must admit I’m impressed with your resilience, if only you used it for something more productive, I’ll forgive you for ruining my clothes and humiliating me if you stop all this.” He called up to her arms crossed, pleased with himself assuming she’d give up but when she didn’t even say anything back he gestured to the guards and they immediately started climbing up her makeshift rope.

“There’s no need to make this difficult Mi corazón!” He added with a chuckle watching her scramble on the rope

“I’m not gonna be your precious trophy to show off and hang off your arm!” Yn yelled back, panicking seeing the skeletal security climbing closer

Thinking fast she started swinging trying to shake them off before getting another idea, swinging harder she jumped off onto a nearby balcony, looking back at the small group of annoyed and scattered security along with Ernesto who grew more angry as his flower ran away

“Don’t just sit there get her-!”

Yn took off running from them, climbing from ledge to ledge before managing to get back onto the ground and thankfully away from security and her less than happy would be fiancé.

Hiding in an alley to catch her breath she was relieved when nobody came running after her, they must’ve lost her she thought, but knew it wouldn’t be long before they’d find her again, all of the land of the dead knew about Ernesto’s precious living woman, his “dancing butterfly” as he called her, she was nearly as famous as him now and as nice as everyone was she knew they’d take her back to him.

Digging around in the back alley she found some discarded clothes and (regretfully) stole some makeup she’d found and got to work on a disguise, hoping she could try and cross the flower bridge she’d originally crossed through that lead her to this beautiful place, where she’d originally run into and been charmed by the skeletal mariachi who offered her a place to stay and help, now those promises were nothing but fantastical words with no meaning like his sugary lyrics, fingers crossed anyways, Ernesto didn’t really tell her much other than it was used for day of the dead, probably keeping a lot from her so as to not give her ideas on how to leave, the clever bastard.

After finishing her skully makeup and throwing on the old dress and cloak she’d found she took a deep breath and stepped out of the shadowy alley, holding her breath for a moment expecting someone to notice she wasn’t a skeleton but no shouting came, nobody came running towards her, everyone went about their way and their usual afterlife.

With a small sigh of relief she started towards the end of town where the bridge was, she’d seen it from his tower, it was a beautiful sight even from far away, she still remembered earlier that day when she first crossed it, originally stumbling across the orange marigold petals in the world of the living and well as they say, curiosity killed the cat, or in this case caged the butterfly.

All seemed fine for awhile as she blended in perfectly, until she noticed a few cops wandering the streets, asking people if they’d seen her at all.

Yn tried to stay calm as she walked past them, pulling the hood of the cloak over her more just in case they saw through her makeup, one skeleton cop stopped her-

“Perdóneme señora-“ they grabbed her shoulder getting the woman to stop;

She flinched expecting she was caught but surprisingly,

“Have you seen the living woman? Señor De La Cruz is worried sick that she’s gone missing.” They explained, showing her a wanted poster of her own face, when did they have time to print these?

With a faux worried smile she shook her head “ah n-no I’m afraid not, I’m sorry

o-oficial…” she mumbled out shrugging trying to act nonchalant, as if nothing was wrong.

But luckily for her the cop didn’t suspect anything, only nodding and thanking her for her time before walking off to ask another person.

Yn pulled her cloak closer and walked a bit faster than before hoping to get to the bridge before someone else stopped her.

By some miracle she reached the petal bridge unbothered finally, fast walking through the fenced in line to the front where she was greeted by the woman running it.

“Hello, how can I help? Are you going to visit family?” She asked her with a kind smile

“Oh um yes! I almost forgot to see them tonight!” Yn lied smiling innocently

“Well first I need to check your photo, can’t get through if it’s not on your family’s ofrenda after all.” The skeletal woman said chuckling softly as she started the computer in front of her,

“All formalities but you’ll be on your way in a-“ she stopped when the computer beeped negatively, yn’s face dropping confused and worried

“Lo siento señora it says you don’t have a photo.” She said with a sympathetic smile to the disguised woman

“Wa- what? But..” after a split second of thinking she quickly wiped off the makeup with the sleeve of her dress, surprising the bridge guard.

“Okay listen- I-I’m not really dead, but I have to get back to the living world, c-can you just.. I don’t let me through?” Yn asked, practically pleading her

The skeletal woman looked at her shocked but quickly was amazed

“Oh! You’re la mariposa bailarina! What’re you doing here? Señor De La Cruz has been looking all over you!” She said excitedly

“Um y-yeah but he uh said it was my time to leave! I can’t stay forever..” she said laughing nervously

“Nonsense! I heard about the proposal at his concert today, felicidades by the way” she said with an innocently kind smile

“Well h-he said I could go to the living world one more time, gotta tie up loose ends with family and all ya know?” Yn said trying to think of ANY good excuse but unfortunately the skeleton didn’t have it

“Oh don’t be silly señora! That’s just wedding jitters! I was the same when I got married, here let me call you an escort, señor De La Cruz will be so relieved to see you’re okay!” She said as she began dialing the phone next to her.

Though before she could make a call yn sprinted off back into town-

Screw it maybe she could find another way home!

She rushed past people in the street ignoring their confused looks and calls until her running was halted, running into a set of ribs where a burly chest once was, a white charro jacket and a baritone voice,

“Ah there you are! I was worried something terrible had happened to you!” Ernesto said putting his arms around her, seemingly gentle to the growing crowd but yn could feel the possessive grip he had on her shoulders, if she looked up at him it would be clear he was hiding his rage for her running away with a sickly sweet, seemingly charming smile, mostly for the sake of the crowd that gathered.

“Yeah h-hey…” she mumbled with a cringing smile as she reluctantly looked up at him, despite her own anger she couldn’t help but blush looking at him, stupid charming smile, those annoying chocolate eyes, his soothing deep voice.. the feeling of his arms around her…

No- focus damnit!

She tried to subtly get out of his arms while he addressed the crowd,

“Thank you for your efforts trying to find her, the poor girl must be exhausted and she needs to get ready for the big event!” He said with a tone of grandeur, exciting the crowd while the two walked back to his home.

The tiny alebrijes greeted their owner and his runaway butterfly as they walked inside.

His charming tone from in front of the crowd was gone, roughly shoving her aside

“This little game of yours ends here- no more running or any of this foolishness!” He shouted while she walked away from him

“Sorry I don’t marry liars! Maybe if you’d kept your word I would’ve consider it.” She said in a sarcastic tone with an equally insincere smile thrown over her shoulder at the furious skeleton

“Ohh wait- if you kept your word I WOULD BE BACK WITH THE LIVING AND BACK HOME!” She shouted at him in return before she stomped off, only to have her wrist caught by his boney hand.

His demeanor had changed, seemingly more calm and his usual alluring charm was back as though they weren’t just fighting barely a second ago.

“Please mi joya preciosa.. I don’t wish to fight with you, perhaps it did start at first that I wanted you to dance for me but you’re a wonderful young woman, all I want now is the want to spoil you rotten, anything your darling heart could ask for, you’d be comfortable here I promise you..” he whispered gently pulling her closer, she hesitantly allowed it, giving him a skeptical look.

His promises did sound, well promising..

Sure she’d miss her family but her life was so boring.. she felt so plain and even ugly compared to most, but here he was, a celebrity practically begging her to stay..

Would it be so bad? Maybe if she made him apologize.. he seemingly would do anything if it meant she’d stay and was pleased, and he was handsome, as far as skeletons go..

———————————————————————

Ending 1

Good ending💍

She looked at Ernesto nervously, obviously thinking his words over as she looked into his eyes, eye sockets? Either way.

“I.. I don’t know, it all sounds.. honestly wonderful…” she said with a soft chuckle, wiping her eye with her free hand feeling tears well up, all of this felt insane..

“Mi corazón.. I’d do just about anything to bring a smile to your face, I.. I’m so sorry for everything..” he mumbled, surprising yn, she was sure she would’ve had to force him to apologize, even threaten him if it came to it.

After a quick moment of silence she spoke up “do.. do you mean all of that? I won’t give my answer unless you’re serious..” she said with a solemn look that tell him she was dead serious, no joking or sly remarks from either of them this time.

He gave her a faint, surprisingly genuine smile, and nodded, gently taking both of her warm hands in his, even without the warmth of skin she could feel some sort of coziness from him in that moment, different from the coldness she’d felt after her escapades after the concert.

“Sí I mean every word Mi vida..” he whispered in a tone that made his sincerity clear, no hint of sarcasm or lies this time.

She took a deep breath and looked up at him

“Alright, I’ll do it.. I’ll admit, all of this attention you’ve given me.. it’s more than what most people would wish for, most people back home never really pay attention to me..” yn admitted, looking away ashamed

“And even before coming here, I’d heard so much about you, I.. I’ve always sort of, wished I could’ve met you, I’d always visit record and thrift stores for your albums and movies..” she added laughing softly with a shy flush on her cheeks.

Ernesto picked her up in a tight but gentle hug excited by her answer, even spinning her around for a moment in the excitement

“This is wonderful! I swear on my afterlife I’ll make sure you’re happy!” He said before setting her back down

“Ah okay okay- one thing though.” She said giving him another stern look, but more amused this time compared to before

“I don’t know how all this works but.. I’ll only marry you on one condition-“

“Anything! Just name it Mi mariposa.” He said kissing her hands over and over, making her blush even further

“If you allow me to visit the living world every now and again, I do.. love you, a lot actually… but I don’t wanna become a skeleton, at least not before it’s really my time to go..” she whispered looking at him cautiously, worried this would be a deal breaker for him.

The mariachi was silent for a bit, worrying her further but she could see the gears were turning in his skull as he thought her request over.

“Very well, I’ll make sure you have free passage to the living world, how does every nine months sounds? It’ll right around dia de los muertos and everyone will be able to go to the land of the living, and don’t worry it’ll be enough time that you won’t change and lose your lovely plump body, you have my word.”

He swore to her with a genuine smile, a slightly less than innocent twist to it though, as if he was imagining her in certain situations, yn having her own thoughts for a moment before she thought his offer over for a few seconds, before returning his smile, blushing even more at his subtly flirty words

“Alright, I can work with that, I can be the Persephone to your Hades.” She said chuckling at the amusing confused look on his face at her mythology joke.

She leaned close and pecked his boney cheek, if Ernesto could blush he would’ve been at the gesture,

“Don’t worry big guy I’ll explain later, we have wedding to prepare right?”

He smirked softly and pulled her into a gentle kiss.

The very stage where this started was decorated for the occasion, flower petals spread all over and an arch of marigolds set up on stage with him waiting underneath the beautiful arch.

It wasn’t long until yn walked up to the stage, dressed divinely in the finest dress he could have made for her, different flowers put in her hair, blazing star, blue bells, bright red roses that matched the blood red ring he had for her, ready to put on her, and lavenders at her request.

Still feeling embarrassed she tried hiding her face in her bouquet once she was in front of him.

In a sincerely loving gesture he reached out and tucked her hair behind her ear, his hand lingering on her cheek before the ceremony began.

True to his character the party after the ceremony was exhilarating, exciting music playing, food everywhere along with people around them dancing, though the now newly weds didn’t notice, happily dancing together ignoring everyone else.

It seemed so strange but yn grew to love the oddity of everything, she would be sure to whip the skeletal musician into shape and clean up his big ego, her spoiled little prince of a husband, but she truly grew to love him, as embarrassed as she was to admit it even now.

“So.. will you still dance for me?” He asked with a sly smirk as they danced, making her laugh softly

“God fine- I’ll be your little mariposa bailarina.” She asked smiling embarrassed

“Maybe for the next performance I’ll detect a song to you..”

“You better you boney meathead..” she replied with just as cheeky of a smirk.

———————————————————————

Ending 2

Bad ending🏃🏻‍♀️

She looked at Ernesto nervously, obviously thinking his words over as she looked into his eyes, eye sockets? Either way.

She pulled her wrist out of his grip, glaring at him, no, no she couldn’t- no matter how tempting his offer and promises were there was just no way!

“I.. I’m sorry Ernesto, but I can’t.. I won’t-“

She said with an angry but nervous glare

His charming facade dropped, giving her a glare in return

“So.. that’s your answer?” He asked in a surprisingly calm voice, yn nodded

“Yes, I’m sorry.. but I don’t belong here, you have to understand that.” She said pretty much pleading with him.

“Stay here any longer and you won’t have choice in the matter perra ingrata..” he said with venom in his voice, roughly grabbing her face, pinching her cheeks as he made her look up at him

“Now do I have lock you in the room I was so generous to set up for you?” Ernesto whispered, giving her a sickly sweet smile that didn’t match his angry tone.

In a rush of adrenaline she shoved him off her and ran, heading out to the front door and shoving her way into the shuttles that went up the tower, yn could hear Ernesto shouting for her, not bothering to pretend around the crowds this time.

Luckily the shuttle doors slammed in his face as he banged his fists on the windows

“How can you be so ungrateful?! I could’ve made you a queen if you’d said yes! No one says no Ernesto De La Cruz!”

“Well there’s a first time for everything!” She yelled back from inside the shuttle car before it took off down the tower, yn gave him a smug smile and a swift middle finger.

Eventually the shuttle stopped at the bottom and once again yn took off running back towards the flower bridge, hoping it wasn’t too late for her to get back to town.

Not far behind her she could hear the enraged mariachi shouting and calling to her, demanding she come back

“The wedding is off you spoiled talentless jerk!” She shouted back at him from over her shoulder, jumping over the railings that lead to the bridge, which started to fall apart.

Security tried to stop him knowing what would happen if someone tried to leave as the sun was rising

“Let me go! Stop her!” He exclaimed shoving them off him

“Get over it you fat headed ass! It’s over!” Yn yelled as she ran across the slowly collapsing bridge until that familiar boney hand grabbed her arm

“I’m not letting you leave after that you llave sin clase!” He said trying to pull her closer to him, how was he so strong without muscles?!

“Learn to write a proper song you fucking jerk!” Yn shouted kicking his face, forcing him to let go so she could run the rest of the way across, leaving Ernesto angry and stunned while getting dragged by security before he could disappear

She fell through onto the ground of the graveyard, behind her the marigold bridge had disappeared, only a few petals were left in its place.

A security guard walked up to her and helped her get up “señora are you alright?”

They said while she dusted herself off.

“Ah y-yes I’m okay, I was uh v-visiting family lo siento..” she mumbled nervously, though relieved to see another human instead of a skeleton finally

“That’s good, I’m afraid the cemetery is closed until later today.” They explained while yn followed them away from the gravyard

Turning around she could see her would be fiancé’s grave, topped with a bust of him in life, she gave a sympathetic smile to the statue

“Sorry amor, maybe we’ll meet again..” she whispered mostly to herself as she left the cemetery.

#fan fiction #fan fic #reader insert #reader x canon #ernesto de la cruz #Ernesto de la Cruz x reader #reader fic #oc x canon #Disney #Pixar #coco #Disney coco #let me know what y’all think #if I make another fic maybe I’ll write the reader more androgynous #I pictured myself as I wrote hence the she her pronouns lol😅#disney fanfiction #Disney reader insert

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