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squadmuse · 26 days

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BABY BARBA

A RAFAEL BARBA X ORIGINAL FEMALE CHARACTER STORY

A/N: ENGLISH IS NOT MY FIRST LANGUAGE, I HOPE YOU ENJOY THOUGH AS THIS IS MY FIRST EVER STORY | CONTENT WARNINGS INCLUDE PREGNANCY, BABY AND RELATED TOPICS | WORD COUNT: 2181 | NOT DIALOGUE HEAVY BTW | THIS STORY IS SET IN 2015 - CHARACTERS ARE OF AGE: 45 & 36 (8 YEAR AGE GAP)

It had been a Tuesday afternoon when Rafael had received the news, the news that his wife was in labor with their child.

Until that moment, it had been a Tuesday not unlike any other that had gone by in Rafael’s life so far. Rafael had never expected to become a father, let alone a husband, and had come to the realization that his future was only that of an attorney, and his loving mother. Life had slipped past him in some regards, although he didn’t see that as something to regret in some ways. Rafael had conquered his own expectations, reached goal after goal and some more. He had become comfortable as a bachelor, comfortable as himself, he was happy.

However, that had all changed when he had met the woman who was to become his wife and him her husband. Much like the snow that was her name, she had appeared during a case he had been prosecuting at the time, graceful yet powerful and leaving Rafael’s cheeks quite rosy.

Nieves Fernandez de Córdoba was her name, a forensic psychologist who specialized in the very special victims that Rafael would find justice for in the courtroom. The daughter of a Spanish father and a Cuban mother, she had been born in America and raised in England. An educated yet exhilarating woman, Rafael had been enthralled by her from the get-go. However, she was quite the professional and so was he, leaving no doubt that any sort of relationship between the two could happen. So, Rafael had settled on being a good friend to Nieves. They had become fast friends, close as friends could be and knew the other inside out. A year had passed filled with memories of art galleries, Broadway shows, quiet nights in with homemade meals, and it had been the greatest year of Rafael’s life. It hadn’t been long afterward that he had bundled up the courage to ask Nieves out officially, to be his girlfriend as she was now working in Brooklyn, and not a potential conflict for their victims’ search for justice. He needn’t have been worried about rejection, as Nieves had wracked her brain in search of how to ask him too.

It felt a lifetime ago now. A real romance had flourished between Rafael and Nieves after that moment. After a year together, they moved in together to a brownstone in Brooklyn. It had been somewhat surreal and surprising to Rafael to see himself settling down, putting roots down and having a wonderful love in his life. A year after that, they had been counting down the minutes until the new year at a resort in Gstaad, when Rafael found himself on one knee and his grandmother’s ring poised towards Nieves. Luckily, she had said yes, and the pair had kissed with love and passion and excitement for their future together. Nieves had wanted a small family wedding, and Rafael could remember the stress that their mothers had been upon them both over the whole wedding from the planning to the big day itself.

Now, after a year of marriage, Rafael was about to become a father, and Nieves a mother. He could remember the moment when Nieves had revealed she was pregnant, a little baby-gro with the words, “Papi’s Co-Counsel,” printed upon it in dark writing. Rafael remembered his tears, the tears from Nieves and the fountain of tears that had erupted from their mothers at the revelation of parenthood for their children and an upcoming grandchild for them both to spoil and cherish.

————

Rafael had just won a high profile case, one that had kept him up over the last few weeks as the court proceedings dragged on. Luckily, he had got justice for the victims and the lone survivor, with the serial rapist and murderer now headed for Rikers with a lengthy prison sentence behind bars. It was a case that Rafael was glad that Nieves had not been involved with, he didn’t need her getting stressed or anything worse so close to her due date. Three weeks were left to go, and he wanted nothing more than for his pregnant wife to be safely away from the sort of scum he had been forced to endure with as the prosecuting senior Assistant District Attorney. As the courtroom began to file out, even Carisi heading out quickly, Rafael found himself reaching for his cellphone.

He never had it on in court, procedure dictating against it being on. Rafael knew if anything happened, god forbid to Nieves or the baby, that someone would reach his or her mother or even Carmen and then one of them to him. But at that moment, he felt an instinctive need to switch the iPhone on. Almost instantly, the screen blew up with missed call notifications and text message after text message, and it set Rafael’s alarm bells ringing and his stress levels skyrocketing. Many of them were from his mother, some from Nieves’ mother and some from the next-door neighbor out in Brooklyn who had become friends with Rafael and his wife since they had moved in. All of them said the same - Nieves was in labor. The baby was coming and was coming early. Three weeks early, and for Rafael it seemed that time stood still at that moment. All that mattered was his wife and unborn child. Not the case, not himself, not any single thing other than the two people he loved more than anything.

Rushing out of the courthouse, nearly barreling into Rollins and Fin who were lingering on the steps, Rafael didn’t bother to fill in either, as it seemed obvious in his haste and rush that only one thing would do such a thing to someone like himself, that Nieves was about to give birth. Both were parents that he knew, and he knew they knew the panic of an expectant parent. Rafael threw himself into the next available cab. The little yellow cab’s driver didn’t notice or even question Rafael’s slightly disheveled look or the rambled directions he gave to the hospital where his wife was at, and it wasn’t long before Rafael was on his way. As the taxi cab drove through an ever-busy Manhattan, Rafael tugged at his tie, the purple silk wrapping around his tense hand and slipping around his fingers. It was actually happening, all those months and all those days had been and gone, and now Rafael was hours away from becoming a father. It was surreal, quite nerve-wracking and almost impossible to comprehend.

But even as one of the most important days in Rafael’s life approached, he wouldn’t have changed it for the world. The love that he had for his unborn child and for his wife was impossible to fathom and both were the greatest gifts that Rafael could ever have imagined. He was still a grumpy, dry-witted attorney with a questionable addiction to coffee and a love of coordinating fashion, and Nieves had never once tried to change him. Rafael was himself, just as Nieves was herself, and so would their baby be whoever they were.

As the cab pulled up outside the hospital, Rafael tipped the driver generously and rushed out, his feet hitting against the ground with passionate intensity that could only be described as an expectant father rushing. Rafael quickly found himself out of breath, panting slightly at the reception of the hospital. A young nurse smiled warmly upwards at him.

“Hello sir, how may I help you today? I am Nurse Wu,” asked the nurse in turquoise scrubs and dark hair styled into an intricate plait. She didn’t rush him, noticing that Rafael had run in.

“M-My wife, my wife is in labor, and she’s here,” replied Rafael with a slight pant. He was in his forties for crying out loud, and even though he was going to the gym regularly now, the impromptu run had him out of breath. Nurse Wu nodded, knowing the tell-tale signs of a new father-to-be.

“Now what is your wife’s name?”

“Oh yeah, sorry,” apologized Rafael to the nurse. “Her name is Nieves Fernandez de Córdoba, I can give you her date of birth and Social Security if you need that?”

Nurse Wu shook her head. “It’s quite alright sir, I’ve met a few fathers-to-be like yourself, so you don’t need to apologize!” she said with a warm smile to Rafael while clicking away at her computer screen.

Rafael chuckled lowly. “Never thought this day would come to be honest, and now here it is.”

Nurse Wu nodded. “Ah, I’ve found your wife, Nieves, is on the OB/GYN floor, in room number 4 and her doctor is a Dr. Herrera, and I wish you all good luck and congratulations.”

“Thank you so much,” replied Rafael and, without delay, he took off in the direction of the lift or stairs.

——————-——

When Rafael finally reached the OB/GYN floor of the hospital, he hurriedly went in search of his wife’s room. He didn’t have to look long, finding the room and rushing inside. Inside, laid on a hospital bed and dressed in a hospital gown was his wife, hooked up to monitors and machines as she chatted away with his mother and her own mother. The commotion that Rafael seemed to make, coming into the private room as if he were a human hurricane, seemed to stun Nieves and their mothers into silence as both Lucia Barba and María Fernandez de Córdoba sat both in soundless shock.

“I’m here!” said Rafael louder than he intended, his anxiety getting the better of him at that moment.

“Dios mio,” exclaimed Nieves with a slight smile as her husband rushed to her side. “ I knew you’d make it, Rafi, but rest assured both of our Mami have been wonderful.”

Lucia smiled, brushing Nieves’s hair softly. “Oh mija, Rafael wouldn’t miss this for anything,” she said lovingly as María sorted out blankets and baby outfits - both grandmothers had been buying nonstop for the new arrival.

Holding onto Nieves’s hand, Rafael nodded in agreement. “Cariño, I’d move heaven and hell to be here with you, to be by your side now and whenever else we find ourselves here,” murmured Rafael as he placed his free hand on his wife’s pregnant belly. The three women chuckled at that and Rafael furrowed his brows in slight confusion.

“Let's have this little one before we think about adding any more little Barbas to our familia,” smiled Nieves.

——

Starlight flickered through the room’s windows and even though it was many floors above the ground, the hustle and bustle of New York City carried upwards, the city that never slept. Rafael, however was also not sleeping, not unlike the city he called home. Nieves was fast asleep, that he could see and knew from where he was nestled in the comfy armchair. Hours had passed since he had arrived into the room where his wife, mother and mother-in-law were, his unborn child about to arrive into the world.

Glancing over the foot of the hospital bed, Rafael’s green eyes fell upon the little bassinet that held his sleeping child. Wrapped up in a little blanket, knitted by Lucia and wearing a little green hat knitted by María, who were both now proud abuelas, was Rafael’s newborn son.

The littlest Barba had entered the world after a long labor, screaming and crying at the top of his little lungs, covered in blood and fluids. Twenty-seven hours after Rafael had received those calls and text messages, his son had finally arrived. With ten little toes and ten little fingers, the little boy was absolutely perfect in Rafael and Nieves’s eyes, minds and hearts.

Óscar Felipe was the name that Nieves and Rafael had settled upon, having decided not to find out the baby’s gender all those months ago. It was a great fit for their son, with his middle name picked in honor of Nieves’s father, who had yet to meet his newest grandson having been stuck in Madrid. Lucia and María had been the only people to meet Óscar, and so far the only ones other than Rafael and Nieves. Both of their mothers had been so overjoyed, cuddling their grandson and showering him with affection and love. Rafael was about to try to sleep, the events of the day finally catching up with his familiar insomnia, when he noticed his little boy starting to get restless and awake in the bassinet. Arising from his seat, Rafael made his way over to Óscar and took in the incredible sight.

Both his wife, mother and even mother-in-law had rambled about how much Óscar already looked like Rafael, the spitting image of the countless baby photos that Lucia had taken all those years ago. His son’s soft head of hair was tucked away under a little knitted hat, hiding it away, but Óscar’s little eyes were wide open.

“The world is your oyster, mijo, and I’ll always be right there beside you.”

#rafael barba #law and order #law & order #law & order svu #svu #special victims unit #rafael barba x oc #rafael barba fanfic #rafael barba x reader #raúl esparza

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uncpanda · 8 months

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Blood is Thicker than Water: Chapter 20

AN: Not going to lie. I STRUGGLE writing wedding scenes. However, I really love how this chapter turned out. Instead of dragging it out, we get snippets. I love that about this. Please leave feedback.

Warnings: None that I can think of.

Master List

Guest List:

“Four hundred and thirty-six people.”

Rafa stares at you. He’s been sipping from that cup of coffee for over two minutes now. You lean forward and say it again, “Four hundred and thirty-six people.”

He finally puts the cup down, “I really don’t see the problem.”

You scream in frustration and stomp right out of the apartment.

The moment the door closes Rafael looks at Benny and asks, “She realizes I have a big family right?”

Wedding Party:

“So that gives me Rita as my best woman, and Ed and Eddie as groomsmen.”

“And I have Liv as my maid of honor.”

Rafa stares at you, “That means the sides are uneven.”

“So?”

“They can’t be uneven.”

You raise an eyebrow, “Why not?”

“It won’t look right.”

“Well, I don’t know what to tell you.”

Your fiance sighs, “What about your friends from college?”

“Most of them are already married and have kids. Plus they live in different states. That’s not fair to ask them.”

“Friends from childhood?”

“I hung out with Elliot’s kids. I haven’t talked to them in years, andI don’t really have a desire to do so now.”

“So this is just how it is.”

“Unless you want me to ask your mother?”

“Nope. We’re good.”

The Venue:

“What do you think?”

You look around at the garden. It is perfect for a springtime wedding. Even without the flowers in bloom, it’s gorgeous.

You look over at Rafa, his smile is stretched across his face. He’s done good. Amazing really. There’s just one problem.

“It’s not going to fit four hundred thirty-six people.”

Your fiance scowls, “We can figure it out. Some people can stand.”

You cross your arms, and lean forward, “That’s against the fire code counselor.” you point towards the plaque that reads a max of 300.

He throws his hands up in frustration, and finally says the words you’ve been waiting to hear, “Fine! I’ll make cuts.”

Ring Bearer:

“He needs a part in the wedding!”

“I’m not disagreeing with you.”

“You said no.”

“I said no, because I already told my sister Noah could do it, and he’s our nephew.”

“Well of course Noah is a ring bearer, I’m just saying Benny could be one too!”

“There’s also the fact that your grandmother might pass out if she sees a dog in the processional. We’re already not getting married in the neighborhood church. She nearly cried when we told her that.”

“She loves Benny!”

“I know, that’s why he can come to the reception and take pictures with us. I already talked to the venue and our dog walker.”

“Oh. Well, okay then.”

Shopping:

“So how did you manage to convince mama Barba and Abuelita and the rest of his relatives not to come today?”

You take a sip of the champagne in your hand, “I told them the truth. This is a you and me thing. No one else allowed.”

Liv smiles, “Well, it means a lot that it’s just us.”

“What do you think of these?”

You and Liv turn together and watch as Ed and Noah come out together. They’re dressed in matching tuxes. You and Liv melt. Noah is absolutely adorable, and Ed actually cleans up pretty good. While Rita is Rafa’s best woman, Ed and Eddie are his groomsmen, and Noah is the ring bearer.

After you’re all done cooing at Noah, Rafael finally steps out of the dressing room. He looks drop dead handsome in his tux. You feel your eyes go wide, and then he gets a little smirk on his face. You know you’re not living this moment down.

Music:

You stare at Rafa. He’s trying not to laugh. You can’t blame him. “She’s going to kill us.”

You smile, “This song comes from the first movie we ever watched together.”

“We’ve already found a way to work quotes into the wedding. If you walk down the aisle to this song, your sister might just kill us.”

You shake your head, a serious look coming over your face, “No she won’t. She knows why I love this movie, why I love the book.”

Rafa looks serious now too, “I think it’s perfect.”

Dress shopping:

“No,no, no, no, no! What did I tell you about off the rack? I said absolutely not! Where is your manager? I helped him evade a racketeering charge, he owes me!”

You sip on champagne and look at your sister. She has that look on her face, “At least it wasn’t a murder or rape charge.”

She nods in agreement before asking, “How did Rita end up on this chopping trip again?”

“This is apparently the best wedding dress shop around. She knows the owner . . . apparently rather well. She’s trying to help.”

A second later a terrified manager and a ranting Rita pass you by.

You both watch them go. You’re happy to say you don’t find your dress in that store.

Dress Shopping Part 2:

The day you find your wedding dress, you’re not expecting it. You’re less than five months away from the wedding, and you’re panicking a little bit. You KNOW it takes time to order a dress. Rita’s told you about it five million times.

You’re walking Benny when you see it. A small bridal shop, with a pretty dress in the window. You stare at it for several seconds before you call your sister. She answers on the first ring, “This better be an emergency. I’m in the middle of a case.”

“I think I might have found my wedding dress.”

There’s a moment of silence, “What’s the address, I’ll be there ASAP.”

You rattle it out just as an employee sticks her head out, “Hi there. Would you like to come in?”

You look down at Benny and she smiles, “He’s welcome to come in too. I love dogs!” You go in.

By the time Liv arrives, Benny is on his back getting belly scratches from the staff while you’re in the dressing room being fitted into your dream dress.

Liv stares at your goofy, three legged dog for a second before she calls out your name. You step out a second later.

You watch her eyes go wide, as she studies you for a second, “That’s it.”

You nod, “Yeah.” There are no tears. It’s just a comfortable feeling. This is your wedding dress.

The Night Before:

The night before your wedding is spent at Liv’s apartment. Ed and Noah head over to your place to spend time with Rafa and Eddie. It’s just the two of you. You put on face masks, paint your nails, and watch Disney movies. It reminds you of one of the best parts of your childhood.

It’s as you’re sitting on the couch that Liv says, “I’m so happy for you. You know that right?”

You smile, “I know.”

“He’s a good man.”

“The best in my opinion, though Ed gives him a run for his money.”

She smiles at that, “I truly think, you’re going to be really happy together.”

“I know so.”

With that, she pulls you in for a hug.

Right Before the Wedding:

You don’t actually feel nervous until about half an hour before the wedding. Your makeup and hair is done. You probably should have been in your dress by now, but you’re still in your getting ready outfit. Things are a bit behind schedule. Noah had a melt down, your sister has cried no less than three times, and Abuelita and Lucia have been bickering with each other. You haven’t seen Rafa. You’re not sure why you’re sticking to this stupid tradition, but you are.

You’re watching the chaos with an observant eye when someone taps you on the shoulder. You spin around to see your sister standing there. She tosses her head to the side and you follow her outside. The sun is shining and the March air is only a little chilly. You close your eyes and allow yourself a minute. When you open your eyes, you see Liv smiling at you.

“What?”

“It’s just crazy. How Lewis,”

“May he rot in hell,”

“Lead to all of this. You moving back and meeting Rafael. Me and Ed connecting, getting married, and having Noah. We’re getting those happy endings we dreamed of as kids.”

You hug yourself and look at the ground for a little bit before you look up, “Did I ever say thank you?”

“For what?”

“For raising me and loving me when you didn’t have to?”

Your sister hugs you, “You never have to thank me for that. You are one of the best joys of my life.” You smile at that.

Walking Down the Aisle:

You’re nervous, but you’re allowed to be. You’re in your dress, your veil is attached, and everyone has walked down the aisle except you and Liv. You look at your sister. She’s dressed in a black dress. She has once again avoided color.

She holds out her arm to you, and you take it. You close your eyes, and you count to three. The music starts: the instrumental Dawn from Pride and Prejudice; the first movie you and Rafa watched together. The movie you two still watch together.

You start to walk. It’s slow, and thanks to the three hundred and twenty three people (Rafa was able to cut it down) you can’t see Rafael yet. You do, however, see Uncle Don, and Finn, and Munch. You smile at them.

And then you turn the corner of people, and you see him. Rafael is standing there. He’s dressed in his tux. His hair is perfectly styled. His eyes are focused solely on you as though you’re the only thing he sees. You feel yourself start to speed up, but your sister grounds you like she always does.

When you finally reach him, you feel your breath leave your chest. And as you take his hand, everything else fades away. It’s just you and him. Just like it’s supposed to be.

#rafael barba fanfiction #ada rafael barba #rafael barba #rafael barba fanfic #rafael barba x you #rafael barba x reader #rafael barba reader insert #law and order fanfiction #law and order svu fanfiction #law and order special victims unit #olivia benson #ed tucker #noah benson

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whoevrwhatevr · 5 months

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Sorry did someone say Barisi book club? 😌

@randomlycee @ada-barisi

#come join us #barisi fanfic #barisi book club #it’s okay if you don’t actually read the fic lol #they’re in love your honor #Barisi #rafael barba fanfic #barba x carisi #lawyer husbands 🥰#your honor they are everything to me #barisi discord #svu

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imagines-for-the-fangirls-soul · 2 years

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Crumbs to Your Love - Rafael Barba

A/N: Hi, hi! I have been binging SVU again and have been recently obsessed with Crumbl cookies, so voila!

Pairing: Rafael Barba x Reader Word Count: 1.9k Synopsis: After a breakup, Rafael attempts to get back in the reader’s good graces with cookies.

Never date your coworkers.

When the relationship ends, there’s the awkwardness when you pass each other at your job. There’s the looks from your other coworkers, the ones who want to choose a side. There’s the tension when you have to interact with each other.

But worse of all, there’s the awkward situation when your ex brings in cookies from the place you have been dying to try, and you have no idea how to ask for one.

“He doesn’t even like cookies,” you whispered to your coworker. The two of you were standing in the corner of the kitchen, the bright pink box of Crumbl cookies sitting on the counter, staring you down.

“What?”

“The man doesn’t eat sweets,” you said. “He doesn’t eat. Why the hell would he order a giant box of cookies? And then why would he share it with his coworkers? He hates us.” You were talking in hushed tones, but the other people in the kitchen still gave you a concerned glance. You forced a smile and looked to your friend.

“I don’t know,” she said, shaking her head, “But I doubt he would care if you took a cookie.”

“Please,” you said, rolling your eyes.

“How would he even know what cookie went to who?”

“Who’s to say he doesn’t have this place bugged with cameras.”

“Why would he do that?”

“I don’t--”

“Y/N, Grace.” You turned towards the doorway as Rafael walked in. He gave you a tight lipped smile. “Did you guys have any cookies yet?”

“No, I--”

“We were actually just about to,” Grace said, pushing you gently towards the counter. Rafael smiled at you and you could have sworn you saw something like triumph in his eyes.

You opened the box of cookies and held back a gasp. Six beautiful cookies looked up at you, all cut into fours, with each missing a few pieces. The longer you stared, the more embarrassing this would be, so you quickly reached for the one closest to you: a cookies and cream cookie.

“Thank you,” you said, looking at Rafael quickly. He nodded his head.

“Yeah. You made a good choice, that was my pick, too.”

You gave him a slight smile as you moved past him. You looped Grace’s arm with yours and pulled her out of the room before she could burst out laughing.

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The next week, you were sitting at your desk when Rafael walked into the room. You were a paralegal, and sat in an office with anywhere from three to six other paralegals at a time, but for some reason he chose you.

He walked up to your desk and you reluctantly looked at him.

“How can I help you, Mr. Barba?” you asked. The lines around his eyes seemed to tighten for a moment.

“Just wanted to let you know I brought in more Crumbl.”

“Why?” you asked. He shrugged. He had one arm behind his back and as you looked at him he revealed the box of cookies he held in his hand.

“Want one?”

“Umm, yes.” He opened the box and this time you picked a quarter of the strawberry one.

“Another good pick.”

“Thank you?”

He gave you a strange smile and backed away from your desk. Before he could walk out the door, the rest of the paralegal team surrounded him and took the rest of his cookies.

As you took a bite of the cookie, unable to stifle the slight groan you let out, your eyes locked with Rafael’s as he was leaving. He smirked before leaving the room.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

For the next three weeks, Rafael would bring in Crumbl cookies, and make a specific effort to be there when you selected one. However, this week, most likely busy with a case, you hadn’t even seen a glimpse of him.

You were heading out for your lunch on a Friday when you spotted him again.

“Y/N, hey!” he called, jogging to catch up with you.

“Hi, Rafael.”

“Would you mind helping me with something?”

“I was actually just about to take my lunch—“

“It’s not work related. Well, not really.”

“What then?”

“I was going to run out for Crumbl again. Maybe you’d want to join me? A few of the people from my floor have noticed the empty boxes and instructed me to get more. I could use the extra hands.”

“Carmen was busy?” you asked, stepping out of the courthouse.

“She was. Plus, I’ve noticed how much you like the cookies—“

“Have you?” you asked with a laugh. Rafael smiled sheepishly at you. “Yeah, sure, I’d be happy to help.”

“Thank you,” he said, smiling at you, “I’ll make sure you get first pick.”

You walked down the street together and the space between the two of you felt unnatural. You were still side by side but there was a magnet pulling your hands together that the two of you fought insistently. Eventually, you couldn’t resist the temptation and stuck your hands in your pockets.

The cookie shop was only a few blocks down, but in the trip over there, it felt like you had met a completely new person.

The Rafael you had dated had been passionate and caring, but also reserved and hot tempered. The Rafael you walked with was open and considerate, he asked you about your day and he listened intently to your answer. By the time you got to Crumbl, you were so surprised by his behavior that you completely forgot why you had walked with him in the first place.

You walked up to the counter and looked at the cookies on display. Just the smell of this place was overwhelming. It was like you walked into cookie heaven and you never wanted to leave.

“So?”

“So what?” you asked, looking back at Rafael.

“What’s your pick?”

“The cake batter one is calling my name,” you said, “But I want to try them all.” Rafael laughed and stepped in line with you.

“I had no idea that people could take cookies so seriously,” he said, motioning to the long line.

“People love limited things. The cookies are only here for a week, so you have to try them each week. It’s kind of genius.”

“It’s kind of bankrupting me,” he said with a soft smile. You laughed. You didn’t remember laughing as much with him before.

“Why did you even start bringing them in in the first place?”

“A friend recommended them to me.”

“But why share it with all of us?” you asked, stepping up in line. Rafael let out a sigh.

“It has been recently brought to my attention that I can be some what of a uncaring person.”

“What? You?” you asked sarcastically. He gave you a false smile.

“It’s not my intention,” he said, “And if I was that way with you—“

“Oh, Rafael, we don’t have to get into this. We’re fine. You are a little . . . brash. But it’s because you work hard. I wouldn’t say you’re uncaring. I think you care too much about the work you do that you sort of forget that you’re not the only one doing it.”

“Thank you,” he said softly. “That’s why I bring the cookies. I would like to make more of an effort with my coworkers.”

“Well, the cookies are definitely working. Although we may all be getting addicted.”

It was your turn and Rafael walked up and ordered a dozen cookies, twice what he usually does. The employee asked if that would be all, and last minute, he added an extra cake batter cookie.

When your order was ready, Rafael grabbed the boxes and handed you the small one. Inside was the warm cake batter cookie.

“Take it as my thanks for coming with me, and an apology for the way I’ve acted.”

“Rafael, I—“

“It’s just a cookie, Y/N.”

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“What do you think you’re doing?”

Rafael looked up from the casework in front of him to see Grace, another paralegal, storm into his office.

“Uh, how can I help you, Grace?”

“You can stop whatever you’re doing with Y/N.”

“I beg your pardon?”

“The cookies, asking her to walk with you, it’s all very obvious that you want her back. You broke her heart once, I’m not going to let you do it again.”

Rafael let out a sigh, looking between her and the open door. “Shut the door.” She gave him a skeptical look but did as he asked. She sat down in front of his desk.

“I made a mistake,” he began. “I messed things up with Y/N. I didn’t bring the cookies in to win her over, but I saw how much she liked them and,” he sighed. “I’m just trying to show her that I’m not the asshole I’ve been.”

“So tell her that,” she said with a roll of her eyes. “Tell her you messed up and want another chance and stop stuffing us with cookies. It’s sad.”

“You can leave my office,” he said, standing. A look crossed over his face like she remembered who she was dealing with. “But thank you. I will take that into consideration.”

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

“Y/N!”

You looked back up the courthouse steps you had just walked down to see Rafael hustling down them.

“On another Crumbl run?” you asked. He laughed gently.

“No, I was looking for you.”

“Oh.”

“I realize that my attempts to turn your affection with cookies isn’t necessarily working, so I just wanted you to know, that I regret the way things ended with us, and if you’d let me, I would like to take you out again to show you I can change and be the kind of person you deserve.”

You looked at him blankly for a few moments, taking in everything he said. “The cookies were to win my affection?” you asked.

“Yes,” Rafael sighed. You smirked as you tried to fight off a laugh.

“That’s really stupid, but also very cute. I would love to go out with you again, Rafael,” you said.

“Really? Are you free now?”

“I am,” you said with a smile. Rafael took your hand in his and it felt right, like something had locked into place finally. “But this date better include a stop to Crumbl because they have a pumpkin flavored one this week.”

“I think that can be arranged.”

#rafael barba #rafael barba x reader #rafael barba imagine #rafael barba fanfic #rafael barba fanfiction #svu #svu imagine #svu fanfic #svu fanfiction #reader insert

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thatesqcrush · 1 year

Text

Staycation: Spooky Edition

A very very late Kinktober piece. Rafael x f Reader (established relationship). WC: 5Kish. CW: this got away from me - there is some very rough sex, some dom/sub dynamics, language, impact play (being smacked and spanked), some degradation talk, oral (m receiving).

AN: big thanks to @beccabarba for help & encouragement.

—

The wind howled fiercely and the sky was an eerie green, a sign of an impending storm. You pulled over and put your car into park. You got out of the car and covered your eyes with your hand as you gazed upon the house ahead of you. It was massive, almost looming before you.

The house was advertised as Victorian and it certainly was, with its red brick, steeply pitched roof, gables and round towers and turrets to draw the eye upward. There was a wraparound porch likely intended to give the home a cozier feel, but overall the house gave off a sinister vibe. It was as if the house watched you back.

Your phone pinged and you were quick to check who it was. It was your boyfriend and he was on his way by train and would meet you later that evening at the house.

You quickly texted him back before grabbing your luggage and making your way up the winding path to the house that would be your home for the weekend.

Your boyfriend was one of the top prosecutors in all of Manhattan. Getting time off was rare but this weekend had been locked away months ago. Rather than spend time at a quaint B&B on the beach, you both decided to make the most of upstate New York in the fall with the ever changing colorful leaves and crisp air. You had found the house on AirBnB and it seemed to be a much more appropriate choice.

You knew from a message from the owner, there was a key under a rock. Sure enough you found the key and unlocked the door. The door was heavy, and opened with a creak. The interior design was ornate and eccentric. On the entryway table was a thick binder with the word ‘welcome’ plastered on it. There was a grand staircase and high ceilings. The house was furnished with hardwood floors, dark wood furniture and decorative wallpaper, multiple fireplaces, a formal dining room, a parlor and even a library.

You settled in quickly, spending the majority of the time poring through the thick binder, which gave a detailed history of the home. You also learned that the home was accompanied with a tragic love story –

In 1837, a man of considerable wealth by the name of William Axtell had this home built for his fiancee. His fiancee was educated, graceful and beautiful, but she was not the one Axtell loved — alas, he was in love with her sister, Alva. He simply couldn’t bear to be without her, and so he did what any man would do: built a secret chamber in his house and hid her away in there. Only one other person knew about Alva: a maid who took care of her and brought her food. Alva would wait all day until William could slip away, and then he’d visit her upstairs in their secret sex chamber. One day, when William was away on an extended business trip, the maid died. There was no one to bring Alva food or drink, and so she starved to death. Let that be a lesson to you if you’ve secreted an illicit love away in a clandestine sex chamber: have some kind of food distribution buddy system in place. You know, like how you don’t go swimming alone.

There was a blueprint of the home which notated where the secret chamber was and pictures of William, his fiancee and Alva.

As you traced the photos, a chill went up your spine. While you didn’t believe in the paranormal, you weren’t completely dismissive of the chill. You warily closed the binder. In that moment, your phone began to buzz causing you to jump. It was Rafael again. You saw the curtain of the window move and realized your chill must have just been the wind from outside. You let out a small laugh at yourself for getting worked up over nothing.

After speaking with Rafael, you finished unpacking before going to the neighboring town for groceries. You had planned on making a romantic dinner for when Rafael arrived. You loaded up on groceries and bottles of wine and made small talk with the cashier as you were rung up.

By the time you got back, Rafael had already arrived. He had settled in as well, having changed from his suit (as he had court that morning) into dark blue jeans, a maroon marled knit sweater. His hair had grayed considerably and was slicked back in a perfect coif. He had grown out his beard a bit, but it was still neat. His cologne was a combination that was equal parts earthy, peppery and citrusy.

“You made it!” You exclaimed as you walked in. Rafael pressed a kiss to your lips and then offered his hands to take the groceries from you.

“This place is incredible,” Rafael replied as he followed you through the house. You nodded excitedly.

“Right? It’s beautiful and there are so many rooms and halls to get lost in. I definitely want to check out the library. Though, when I first arrived, it gave me —“

“A spooky vibe?” Rafael interjected. He rummaged for a wine opener, winking when he found one. You reached for the wine glasses and quickly rinsed and dried them. Rafael set the opened wine aside to let it breathe.

Rafael wrapped his arms around your waist. “Yeah, I got the same vibe. You’re not scared are you?”

You ran your fingertips under the hem of Rafael’s sweater, letting out a little hum as his muscles twitched beneath your touch. Rafael pulled you even closer, lifting your chin with the crook of his index finger. His green eyes twinkled and you felt yourself grow warm. “Not at all. I’ve got my big strong boyfriend from the Bronx to keep me safe.”

—

It had started to rain.

Raindrops pelted hard and the exterior board and batten shutters swung wildly, pounding against the house. You and Rafael ran around the house shutting them and making certain the doors were bolted.

The two of you settled in the living room, sitting in front of the fireplace. The fire crackled and popped. Rafael between your legs and leaned back against you. He turned the page of his worn copy of Jekyll and Hyde, and continued to read out loud. You closed your eyes, letting the timbre of his voice envelope you as you played with his hair, massaging his scalp in process.

Suddenly everything went dark.

"Guess it was bound to happen sooner or later," Rafael remarked. Carefully you both stood and you each turned on the flashlights on your cell phones to look around.

You looked at Rafael. “The binder said that the fuse box was downstairs in the basement.”

Rafael sighed. “I guess I’ll be going down to the basement.”

“I’ll go,” you volunteered. “Stay up here and text me if the lights come back on.”

—

All Rafael could hear was the sound of the storm pushing through. He tried to check on the duration of the storm but his phone was loading slowly.

There was a flicker and then the lights came back on. Rafael sighed in relief and texted you that the lights were back. He anticipated the sound of your footsteps bounding up the stairs but nothing came.

Rafael waited a few more minutes, ignoring the knot of worry that was beginning to brew. He texted you once more and called your name.

Again nothing.

Fear pricked at Rafael. It wasn’t like you to not be responsive. He made his way down the basement, his heart thudding in his chest and his palms beginning to sweat. He called for you but was answered in silence. He crept quietly, but the floor still creaked with every step. His pulse pounded in his ears.

Rafael had been a prosecutor for far too long. His mind was racing in all the ways you could have been possibly kidnapped or murdered. He was all set to call Olivia when something caught his eye.

At the end of the hall, a bookcase was turned vertically, revealing a partially opened door. Rafael walked toward it, even though all his horror movie training screamed at him to not to. He called your name once more as he fully opened the door.

The oxblood-hued room was packed with recherché items that wouldn't look out of place in a grand gentlemen's club, including a posh Chesterfield chair, vintage ship model and antique carriage clock. There was a plush bed with bedding that could be described as sumptuous.

Rafael recalled the story of William and Alva that you told him over dinner. It dawned on him that this room was the secret chamber. He walked in cautiously and carefully, scanning the room. There was a knot in his stomach, and he felt tense all over.

He had the sense he was not the only one in the room. When he turned around, he was met with you shouting “Boo!” in his face.

Rafael let out a shout, nearly jumping out of his skin. “Jesus Christ!”

You began to laugh. “I’m sorry but that was just too easy. I couldn’t help it.” You continued to laugh, so much so that you had to double over.

Rafael gave you an incredulous look. “Ha ha, really fucking funny.”

You stood up, still chuckling a bit and wiped your eyes. “Oh come on! It was just a joke! You have to admit that I got you good.”

Rafael glowered at you and took a step closer towards you. “You know, I don't like practical jokes.”

You smirked and cocked your brow, challenging. “And what are you going to do about it?”

Rafael reached for you and pulled you close to him where you were practically chest to chest. Your palms were on his chest and you could feel his heart thundering rapidly. He gripped your chin with his index and thumb. “You’ll see.”

You saw the change in his expression to something more lustful and predatory, the sensual look in his eye sending a jolt of hot anticipation through you.

You jerked your chin from his grip but barely had a chance to look away as he gripped your cheeks, squeezing but not too tightly.

“Look at me when I’m talking to you. Do I look like I am playing a fucking game?” Rafael all but growled, his green eyes burning with desire. You shook your head in response. Your pulse began to quicken and arousal stoked your core. “For the rest of the time we are here, you will answer me as sir.”

“Yes.”

His gaze darkened as he ran his fingers softly along your jawline, holding your chin so your eyes met his. When his fingers flattened out against your cheek, you had an inkling as to what was coming. Still, when the sharp smack landed against your skin, you jumped slightly. The sting bloomed into heat. Rafael knew what that did to you, and you didn't miss his little smirk as he did it again, slightly harder, pricking your skin, watching your reaction. He put a fingertip beneath your chin.

“What did you say?” Rafael prodded, his brow cocked.

“Yes sir.” You breathed.

“Good girl,” Rafael murmured. He then kissed you hard, all teeth and tongue. His hand was tight in your hair, pulling your head back so he could kiss and suck along your neck. His teeth grazed sharply against your skin, causing you to groan in response to the pricks of pain. A dark mark bloomed easily and he ran his tongue over it, soothing the area. He again nipped up your jawline before kissing you once more, the kiss more soft than before, but still full of passion. His tongue licked hotly in your mouth. You could feel his cock, hard against your body. Your were certain you were already dripping and your nerves were buzzing, erotically charged.

“Strip. And get on the bed,” Rafael all but growled.

You looked at the bed and then around the room. You also were certain that the room was haunted as fuck, but you did not want to bring it up lest it change the mood.

“Did I fucking stutter?” Rafael snapped, bringing your focus back to him.

“No sir!” You yanked your shirt off and then sat on the bed to remove your shoes. This was then followed by your pants and undergarments. You laid prostrate on the bed, eagerly anticipating Rafael’s next move.

Rafael stood at the foot of the bed and placed his hands on his hips, his green eyes narrowing at you a little as took in the sight of your naked form. He began to undress himself. Buttons were undone nimbly and quickly, followed by his shoes and remainder of his clothes. He jacked himself languidly, casually spitting into his palm.

The bed creaked under his weight and you felt him move behind you. His large hands ghosted your skin, feeling the knobs of your spine. When he got to your ass, he squeezed your flesh, before laying a hard spank on your ass. You let out a small moan, which garnered another spank, this time harder than before. Rafael sat on his haunches, spreading your ass cheeks apart. Nothing major had even happened yet and he already knew you were dripping.

Rafael sucked on two of his fingers, using his own saliva to lubricate them. The tips of his fingers ghosted over your puckered rosebud before shoving his fingers inside of you. Your startled gasp turned into a breathy moan as he coated them in your wetness before pulling them out to spread it over your pussy, and then shoving them back in, fingering you roughly. His other hand landed sharply on your ass giving you another spank.

“A mess,” Rafael growled. “I can fucking smell how needy you are.” The pace of his fingers increase and the wet sounds of your arousal are evident in the quiet room. “Tonight is about me. Your one job is to make me happy.”

“Yes sir,” you gasped in reply, your hips moving in their own accord to match the thrust of his hand.

“You’re going to pay for your stunt. You’re not going to come until I tell you to. Me entiendes?”

You were completely lost in your pleasure and his words didn’t register. When you failed to respond, he abruptly removed his fingers, causing you to cry out at the empty feeling.

Two more spanks. The skin of your ass was hot and you wondered if Rafael could see the outline of his hand. Rafael grabbed your ass cheeks and spread you apart once more. You felt his stubble, pricking your skin and then you felt the prick of his teeth once more as he bit you - first one then the other, then repeating in a pattern. The bites are followed by additional spanks. It was unrelenting, the sting of the bites and spanks caused your toes to curl. And then it was over and you felt Rafael’s tongue on your skin licking soothingly. His mouth hovered over your pussy, his breath hot. You pushed back, desperate for more.

Rafael smacked your ass once more. “No sweetheart. Your job is to make me feel good tonight. And maybe, just maybe, if you’re good enough, I will let you come.”

You nodded and Rafael’s eyes narrowed.

“Use your words,” he commanded.

“Yes, sir. Going to make you feel good,” you whimpered. Rafael smirked and nudged you to roll over. He wrapped his arm around you, and pulled you flush against him. You could feel his cock on the small of your back, hard and leaking.

His other hand smoothed up your thigh, encouraging it apart from the other one as he reached your pussy and traced his fingers through your folds. He stopped as he pressed down on your clit and drew his hand back to deliver a short, hard spank to the swelling bundle of nerves. You squealed, body jolting at the sudden impact.

“Fuck,” you muttered, biting down on your bottom lip. Rafael’s face disappeared into the crook of your neck, sucking and kissing your skin while one hand grabbed your tit, tugging and twisting your nipple. You let out a small moan in response. His other hand headed back down to your opening, fingers inside of you, pumping. You groaned, your nails digging into the meat of his thighs.

“I want to cum, sir, please,” you begged desperately.

“No,” Rafael replied sternly. “Hold it.”

“Please, please, I’ll be a good girl,” you begged again. A sharp spank landed on your pussy and you squealed.

“What did I tell you about begging me?” he growled. You felt the pad of his thumb tease your clit. “So fucking wet. I bet I could just slide my cock in and make that tight pussy take it. You’d take it, right?”

“Yes,” you hissed, your eyes screwing shut.

You felt your orgasm bubble up in your gut and you tried to ignore it but it was futile. Rafael felt you tense and he removed his fingers from you and slapped your pussy sharply once more. You let out a whimper in response.

You turned to Rafael and leaned down to kiss him. The kiss was sloppy, open mouthed, his tongue licking hotly into your mouth. You pulled away briefly and grabbed his hand to suck his finger, imitating what you wanted to do.

“Want to suck my cock?” Rafael asked. His breathing was already labored, intent on making the evening last but he was already overworked. He knew once he fucked you, it wouldn’t be long.

You nodded, humming in agreement.

“Ask me to let you.”

“Yes sir. Can I taste your cock sir?” Your eyes met his. A delicious smirk curled on his plump lips and lit up his entire face. His green eyes sparkled with mischief.

Rafael nodded and spread his legs wider to make room for you. As you positioned yourself, he gripped himself at the base. You looked up at him and he tapped his cock against your mouth. “Open.”

You follow his command and open your mouth to take his cock. He’s cut. It’s a nice fleshy pink color, but the head is a couple shades darker; when you’ve been edging him, it darkens to almost purple. There are a few visible veins, and an especially thick one that runs along the underside.

Saliva gathered in your mouth at the sight of his heavy cock. A thick line of pre-cum dripped out of his slit, dripping down until it slowed at the base. Your hand ghosted over the patch of dark curls there, sending a shiver up Rafael’s spine.

You wrapped your mouth around the head of his cock, enveloping it in your warm, wet heat. You sucked, pulling the salty liquid from him and onto your awaiting tongue, letting out a small hum. You pulled off briefly and then opened your mouth wider so you could take more of him.

Rafael petted your hair softly, enjoying watching you take his cock inch by inch, until the head of his cock hit the back of your throat. You gagged slightly, and then pulled off to catch your breath.

“Let me change position,” Rafael commented. You remained in place as he climbed off the bed and stood. He beckoned you with a finger and you quickly scrambled over. You looked up at him, batting your eyes. He tapped his cock on your lips and you opened widely.

“Relax sweetheart, open your throat,” Rafael ordered as he began to feed his cock into your mouth. You closed your eyes, breathing deeply through your nose. His hands wove into your hair and he pulled your head forward as he snapped his hips, shoving the remainder of his thick cock into your mouth and throat. His hands were firm in your hair, keeping you in place. Your eyes began to water and saliva pooled from the corners of your mouth. He withdrew and repeated again and again, holding your willing mouth flush against him, your nose buried in his salt and pepper curls.

Finally, he relented and began to thrust into your mouth, a brutal pace abusing your throat with his thick length. Tears streamed down your face, and your eye makeup was smeared. Any gloss that might have remained on your lips was now gone.

“You take my cock so well,” Rafael praised. He pushed you a bit further, your jaw ached and throbbed. “Such a dirty girl with my cock in your throat. Do you like having my cock in your throat?”

You let out a muffled response and Rafael pulled you off of him, by your hair. The pain ebbed into a tingle of pleasure.

“What was that? I couldn’t hear you.”

He watched in fascination the spit string that connected your lips to his cock pull thin before finally breaking.

He gripped your chin hard, smushing your lips together. He slapped you once more. “Answer me.”

Your cunt clenched in response to the sting.

“Yes sir, I love your cock in my mouth,” you croaked. Rafael laughed and shoved your head back onto his cock. His hands were on the sides of your head, moving your head over his cock, his hips meeting the movements. He growled as he fucked your face, testing the limits your throat could handle. But you knelt there, mouth open wide as another wave of tears streamed down your face, moaning as he pushed you past the limits of comfort, ruining you. You could feel your juices slick on your thighs and there was a growing ache in between your legs that so desperately wanted to be touched. And while your throat was sore and your jaw ached, you loved it when Rafael used you as he pleased.

“Good girl, take that cock,” Rafael grunted. He bent forward, leaning over your body so he could slip his fingers back into your pussy. Because of the position, you began to bob on his cock, using a hand for assistance. The only sounds in the room were his grunts and groans, mixed with your muffled moans and whines.

“I’m going to cum if we keep this up” Rafael groaned and he withdrew from your mouth and pussy. You watched him as he sucked his fingers clean of your pussy juice. He let out a hum of satisfaction. Your eyes went down to his cock, it stuck out with a slight curve. Cum leaked easily now.

Rafael watched you and he smirked. “Is there something you want?”

“Yes sir.” You replied. Without prompting, you elaborated. “I want your cock sir.”

“I didn’t hear you say please.”

“Please sir.”

“Turn around,” Rafael commanded. You acquiesced to his request, turning around so you were on all fours.

Rafael wasted no time. The bed dipped with his weight and spread your cheeks once more. “Look at that pretty pussy. And it’s mine.”

He thrusted in himself inside of you, burying himself to the hilt. His pelvis was snug against the curve of your ass. He waited a minute, letting you adjust. He saw you nod and he began to move. He started slowly at first but steadily picked up speed. His balls are hefty and you can feel the weight of them slap against your pussy. He held on to your hips steadily, driving your ass lower into the bed until your legs buckled and you landed on the bed, ass up, torso down, face into the mattress.

The pace was brutal as he fucked you hard and deep. His fingers dug into your hips and you’re certain that there will be bruises once done. You felt every ridge of his cock against your walls with each harsh thrust and you needed more of it. You heard yourself - don’t stop, fuck me harder, give it to me - but it all sounded slurred to you.

There are a series of spanks to your ass in response.

Rafael’s legs were now framing your thighs, pounding down into you. You gripped the bedspread and cried out his name every time his cock pistoned into you again.

Suddenly you were aware that your arms were being pulled behind you. Rafael held your arms together, handcuff style, as he continued, giving you exactly what you wanted - what you both so desperately wanted. He’s also chasing his release, but he will give you what you want.

You bit down on your bottom lip as he took you closer and closer to the edge. Your clit throbbed, aching, needing to be touched.

“Fuck, you’re so tight, so fucking perfect,” Rafael grunted. Sweat dripped down his body and onto yours as he kept his pace. “I bet you wanna come.”

A stream of yes, yes, yes, left your mouth.

Rafael slowed his pace and you whined in protest. “Don’t stop, please. Sir, please.”

“Thank me for fucking you. And maybe I will let you come.”

You nodded frantically. “Your cock feels so good! Yes, yes! Thank you for fucking me sir!”

“Atta girl, now you get it. Whose pussy is this?”

“Yours sir!” You cried out.

Rafael released one of your arms. “Go ahead, come.”

You frantically reach below to your clit and your fingers slip due to the mix of your and Rafael’s wet mess. You find your clit and rubbed in haphazard circles, chasing the sweet relief of orgasm. It doesn’t take long and before you realize it, you are coming hard, Rafael’s name escaping from your lips. It had never been this intense before, as if one orgasm rolled into the other. Rafael groaned as you squirted, your juices releasing all over his cock. He inwardly beamed - you hadn’t ever done that before.

“Yes,” Rafael hissed. “Coat that cock, cover it all up.”

You slumped forward, unable to hold yourself up. You are lost in your own haze, unaware that Rafael hadn’t come yet. You let out a yelp as Rafael pulled you upward, thrusting back into you. The pace is somehow even harder than before as you hear the sound of skin slapping on skin.

Rafael is growling and grunting. “You think just because you fucking came, that it means get to be fucking lazy on me?”

“No sir,” you cried out. The ache that had dissipated started to grow again. “Fuck me sir. Use me!”

Rafael’s teeth gnashed together as his release approached. A deep rumble emanated from his chest and you had been intimate with him long enough to know that he was about to come.

He grunted, pumping faster, and then his hips jerked, stuttering in their rhythm, and he came, hard. Ropes of thick white creamy come filled you. “Fuck, fuck, oh my god, fuck!” He shuddered as he finished coming. He stayed there before withdrawing, his cock softening. You felt some of his come dribble out.

You both flopped onto your backs, bodies covered in sweat and heaving, trying to catch your breath.

Rafael shifted and he loomed over you. You furrowed your brows at first but then your mouth formed an ‘O’ as he pushed up your legs. He used his fingers to spread your lips and watched as his release dripped out of you. He scooped up some and spread it along your belly, as if he was marking his territory.

He reached back down to your pussy and scooped some more of his release. He then spread it on your clit, and began to rub you once more.

“I know you can do it again.” Rafael slid two fingers inside of you, curling them.

Your legs trembled as you felt yet another orgasm begin to build. You can almost feel Rafael’s smile against you as he jackhammered his fingers inside of you, fucking his come back into you.

“Come on, one more sweetheart.” His words were your undoing and your hips jerk. He lifted his head and you looked at him with wide eyes. “Give it to me.” He began rubbing your clit roughly and horizontally rapidly. You arched your back sharply, and wailed as you came again. Sound went fuzzy and you squeezed your eyes tightly. Rafael just kept his mouth open by your cunt, collecting your cum in his mouth as you squirted once more.

You collapsed against the bed as you came down back to reality. Rafael covered his body with yours and pressed a kiss to your mouth, sharing your come with you. The kiss was wet and messy but soft, dare say gentle.

“How was that?” Rafael questioned, his eyes searching yours. “Are you okay?”

You hummed ame gave him a smile. “Oh yeah. That was perfect.”

Rafael eventually peeled his sweaty body off of you. You snuggled into his chest, basking in his warmth.

All of a sudden, the lights flickered and the room was plunged into darkness. It was followed by a sound that could only be described as non human. You yelped and then the lights flicked back on.

You and Rafael looked at eachother, eyes wide, both of you clearly spooked. “Let's get out of here!”

Rafael nodded and you both scrambled, grabbing your clothes before peeling out of the room and heading back up stairs.

When you both got back to the main floor, you were both laughing hard as you redressed. “Jesus, Joseph and Mary!” You cried out. “What the hell was that?”

Rafael shook his head and rubbed his face. “Let's not go back down there.”

You nodded. “But what you did down there - that you can do again.”

Rafael gave you a wicked smile, his eyes lighting up in response.

“But first can we find someplace else to stay?” You questioned, your tone hopeful.

Rafael nodded, finding his phone. “Already on it.”

FIN.

Tags: @mgarner1227, @madpanda75, @beccabarba, @dreamlover31, @sass-and-suspenders, @melk917 @youreverycolor, @neely1177, @witches-unruly-heart, @skittle479, @plaidbooks, @mommakat32, @garturbo, @sweetsummertime99, @ottosuricato, @qvid-pro-qvo, @lovebishoplosamiguelgalindos, @annabelleb49, @zoeykaytesmom, @bananas-pajamas, @pieceofshittytitty, @itsjustmyfantasyroom, @ktiz90, @evee87, @differentshadesofgray @catnip987 @detective-giggles @alwaysachorusgirl @amelia-song-pond @rachelxwayne @permanentlydizzy @averyhotchner @missirenlove @tintinxtintin @law-nerd105 @bisexual-dreamer02 @rampantmuses @mishaissocoolike @choppedgalaxynerd @beardedbarba @storiesofsvu @a-brignac

#rafael barba imagine #rafael barba fanfic #rafael barba x reader #rafael barba and reader #rafael barba smut #barba x reader #thatesqcrush kink bingo

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oh-you-mean-me · 11 months

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SVU Fanfic

Does anyone know the name of a fanfic that was "Sonny Carisi x reader" or "Rafael Barba x reader" depending on which version you chose? The reader and Sonny are together then break up. Later she comes back as a defense attorney and it's there that the choice is made. I remember specifically there was a part where if reader chose right she'd end up at a bar and that would lead toward Barba and if she chose left she'd go toward Sonny (or maybe Barba was left and Sonny was right). I remember if you chose the Sonny route that he'd write her a letter and she'd write him one back, but then ripped it when she saw Sonny with a pregnant Amanda

#rafael barba x reader #sonny carisi x reader #svu fanfiction #rafael barba fanfic #sonny carisi fanfiction #law and order svu #fanfiction series #sonny carisi x you #rafael barba x you #law and order imagine

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gudvina · 3 months

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The ninth chapter of Si mañana amanece is out!!!!

#barson #rafael barba #olivia benson #law and order svu #barson fanfic #rafael barba fanfic #olivia benson fanfic #law and order svu fanfic #svu fic

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rafivadafreddy · 11 months

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Thank you to everyone who got me to 500 likes!

#500 likes #tumblr milestone #thank you #raul esparza #rafael barba #rafael barba fanfic

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itsjustmyfantasyroom · 1 year

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Job well done

WC: 759

Warnings: Smut Smut Smut. Its been a while, so why not just jump straight into it. No lead up just straight into it.

Enjoy x

His long fingers were wrapped around your wrist as they were pinned above your head and being pressed into the wall. His lips, which were surprisingly warm pressing into your skin, the feeling of his beard along with his lips making you shiver as they ran along your skin. His fingers toyed with the hem of your skirt and he chuckled into your neck when you let out a whine when he moved his hand away for a moment. His hand was soon back to where it started and you shivered again, pressing your chest into his more by aching your back as his hand was still making its way up the inside of your thigh. You were so wrapped up with the feeling of his soft palm on your skin that you startled when his lips where at your ear, his breath also warm hitting your skin,

“I was proud of you today” Rafael whispered in your ear, his long pointer finger now running along the lace edge of your panties “Did Liv know you came here? She wouldn’t be very pleased.”

“No” you gasped back shaking your head slightly as his fingers started to push into the side of your panties more, making their way to your very wet core “I don’t really care what Liv would have to say right now” You locked eyes with his beautiful green ones.

“She will need to know eventually, mi amor” Rafael said firmly in a voice that usually only had one reaction from you as he slid two fingers into your warm centre “So wet for me Y/N, you like when I talk to you like that, don’t you?” Rafael twisted his fingers inside you, pointing them upwards to hit your sweet spot and you nodded “Use your words Y/N”

“Yes Sir” you moaned as Rafael’s fingers moved inside you.

“Good Girl” Rafael rolled his hips into your thigh, his hard cock pocking you.

Your eye’s locked with Rafael’s again and he could feel your core starting to clench around him, your mouth dropped open slightly, a devilish grin on Rafael’s face and the sound of your wetness filling his new office.

You hadn’t had a moment to even register what was happening with how fast Rafael moved and before you knew it, your skirt was up above your hips, your panties pooled around your feet on the floor, Rafael’s pants were around his ankles, he had rolled on protection and his hands where on your ass cheeks hoisting you up just enough for his long hard cock to slide into you and you were pushed back into the wall, your legs wrapped around his middle and his long fingers pressed into the soft flesh of your behind, your body sent into over drive as his hips rolled into you hard and fast.

Your arms wrapped around his neck and you pulled him into you, your lips crashing together, your tongues pushing into each other mouths rolling together. Your walls started to tense around Rafael and he could feel it too, his hip thrust getting faster and the bottom of his dress shirt pressed so hard between you both that it was rubbing on your needy pearl, causing a delicious kind of friction.

Your whole body felt hot and your legs started to tingle. You broke the kiss, your forehead resting on his. Your eyes slammed shut and you bit hard into your bottom lip, trying not to be loud as you came hard around him your breath almost taken away with how intense you came. Rafael moved his hips faster, you could feel the sweat forming on his forehead before you moved your head and put your lips to his ear,

“Cum for me Sir, give it all to me”

Rafael rolled his hips hard into you, stilled and said your name and a few swear words under his breath. He took in a deep breath before you loosened your legs around him and he made sure you had your balance first and then kissed your forehead and then your lips sweetly. Rafael turned away walking over to his desk and cleaning himself up, while you fixed yourself up, smoothing your hair flat at the back,

“We need to tell her, love” Rafael smoothed the hair on face with his long fingers, looking at you dead in the eyes.

You rolled your eyes walking over to him throwing your arms around his neck and his moving around your waist,

“After that, whenever you want Rafi”

Tags: @detective-giggles @beccabarba @witches-unruly-heart @dianilaws @scarletsoldierrr @lv7867 @permanentlydizzy @averyhotchner @infiniteoddball @fandom-princess-forevermore @madamsnape921 @annabelleb49 @alwaysachorusgirl @thatesqcrush @gillysoldlady @jemmakates

#rafael barba fanfiction #barba fanfic #rafael barba fic #barba x reader #ada rafael barba #rafael barba #rafael barba x yn #rafael barba x reader #rafael barba x you #rafael barba x female reader #rafael barba smut

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daddydoddsjr · 1 year

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Married — Ficlet

Pairing || Rafael Barba x Female!Reader

@xovalliegirlxo

Contents/Warning || Angst, medical talk, hospital setting, slightly detailed heart attack

Rafael didn’t really see the need for anyone to know his business; he had an attitude of, ‘it’s work, not social time.’ You and Rafael got married soon after he graduated law school and the two of you were happy together— just not super open about the marriage. You had a small marriage with only the closest family members present. It was sort of funny, though, when a colleague of his or yours would find out about the marriage in the present since you’d been married several years now.

Olivia didn’t know that Rafael was married, but she was there when he had what she assumed was a heart attack. He was at his desk while she was pacing the room when he suddenly started sweating. He pulled off his blazer but kept sweating, and he suddenly interrupted Olivia, “Benson…” He said in a serious tone. She stopped and looked at him, noticing the strange look on his face, “Raf?”

He blinked, putting a hand over his chest, his eyes looking glossy, “Uh..”

“What’s wrong? Should I call a bus?”

Rafael nodded. It got much worse after that, and it all became a blur to Olivia.

She didn’t know who to call while she was in the hospital, she always knew Rafael to be so work oriented and closed off about his like that she assumed he didn’t have anyone. Until you showed up. You were walking down the hall, looking for his hospital room when you spotted Olivia. You had seen her on the news a few times and knew that Rafael worked closely with her. You walked up to the place she was standing as she was texting Sonny on her phone giving him an update, “Olivia Benson?”

She looked up, “Yes?”

“Are you here for Rafael? Which room is he in?”

“The doctors are running a few tests, they won’t let anyone in the room yet,” She gestured to the room before inviting you to sit on a small waiting sofa next to the door, which the both of you did, “Um… are you family?”

You sighed in relief that he was safely in a bed and the doctors would figure out why he had the heart attack, “I’m his wife.”

That felt like a brick to the head. Rafael was married? How the hell did she not know that? She got over her shock momentarily to make small talk with you, trying to keep your mind occupied while you awaited the doctors return. It didn’t take too long for the doctor to exit Rafael’s room, and you quickly stood up, “Is he okay?”

“He should be fine.”

“Well, what happened? Why did he have a heart attack in the first place?”

“He’s in a common age range for heart attacks in men. He also mentioned to me that he’s been stressed and I believe that that was a main factor in this. Typical heart attack recovery is two weeks to three months, and I suggest after he recovers, he takes some time off of work to reduce his stress.”

You nodded quickly, “Of course. Thank you. Can I see him?”

The doctor nodded and moved aside for you to enter the room. You teared up at the sight of Rafael in the hospital bed, but he gave you a weak smile.

“You scared me,” You sighed, pulling a chair up besides the bed. You sat down and took one of his hands into yours and squeezed gently.

“I’m sorry, mi amor,” Rafael exhaled. But the two of you were just glad that the situation wasn’t any worse than it already was.

Rafael still teases Olivia once in awhile for her ‘poor detective skills’ after he recovered and found out that the two of you had met.

#law and order svu #l&o: svu #raul esparza #rafael barba #svu #olivia benson #mariska hargitay #sonny carisi #rafael barba fanfic #rafael barba x female reader #rafael barba x reader #rafael barba x you

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lovingbarson · 4 months

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Happy new year to all the tumblr daddies and mommies and all the writers and all the readers and all the characters that make me feel happy and loved (I am not drunk just depressed)

#daemon x reader #doctor who #rafael barba x reader #aaron hotchner x reader #alex kingston #matt smith #mattex #devil wears prada #hotd #new year #fanfic

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whoevrwhatevr · 6 months

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Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Law & Order: SVU Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Rafael Barba/Reader, Rafael Barba/You, Rafael Barba/f!reader, Rafael Barba/Female Reader Characters: Rafael Barba, Reader, You, F!reader Additional Tags: Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, except theres accidentally a little plot, Smut, Porn, Porn with Feelings, PWP, Vaginal Sex, Penis In Vagina Sex, Oral Sex, Blow Jobs, Getting Back Together, Daddy Kink, just a lil bit, Sex, its just smut folks Summary:

Much to your surprise, Rafael Barba is back in New York. Fuck, he still looked good.

#rafael barba x reader #rafael barba x reader smut #rafael barba #fanfic #rafael barba fanfic #rafael barba x f!reader #rafael barba x you #smut #ao3 #mature content warning

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narcissuslecter · 16 days

Text

hey babes, it's me, your fave internet menace, will graham smokes truther, writer who has been writing again but very slowly!

i've been crazy busy with work and life but i have also been watching sooo much svu and i started watching house so like... house/hilson fics soon??

anyways, on the writing side of things, i've been writing like a beast but im also self critical as ever so it's a fight! but baby we got as needed chapter 3 coming up soon, some angsty carisi for all u svu babes.

for u hannigram babes we got fics for u too, bunch of songfics bc unfortunately, it's what i do best. lots of music, lots of messy power dynamics, lots of smut <3

and don't think i forgot about u criminal minds babes, there is some stuff in the workssss.

all that rambling aside, send me headcanon reqs, send me asks!

be gay, see u next time <3

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thatesqcrush · 2 years

Text

12 Steps to Love, Step 5: Admitted to ourselves and to others the exact nature of our wrongs

Rafael Barba x f!reader. CW: heavy angst & language. WC: 3,780. AN: Italics indicate the past.

“I’m sorry I am late,” you shouted as you made your way inside Rafael’s apartment. The relationship between the two of you had grown and Rafael recently gave you a key to his apartment.

“My phone died,” you continued. “And then I got stuck in traffic and the stupid taxi driver insisted on taking 6th Avenue even though I told him not to.”

Rafael stuck his head out from the bedroom, nimbly buttoning his cuffs. You noted that he has changed his dress shirt from the one he wore earlier to court. “I was worried when you didn’t answer your phone.” He grabbed his tie and looped it around his neck.

You set your bags down and walked over to him. You gently swatted his hands away and took over tying his tie. “I wouldn’t miss tonight for the world,” you murmur. “You know that.”

Rafael grabbed your wrists gently, pausing your actions. “I do.” He moved his hand, and brought it to your face, stroking you gently with the crook of his finger. He bent down to kiss you softly. “Now, go get ready or we really will be late.”

You turned and Rafael gave your butt a playful spank, causing you to giggle. You changed out of your work attire into a simple black sheath dress. The weather was warm now, so you decide to forgo stockings. Instead, you wear a simple matching lace set under.

You have trouble zipping the back of your dress and call for Rafael to help. “I’d much rather undo the zipper,” he husked against your ear as he zipped it up. Rafael pulled you close against him and you felt his erection pressing against your lower back. Teasingly you wiggled your hips, eliciting a small groan from him. You turned your head towards him.

“Soon.”

“Not soon enough.”

You turned fully around and look into his eyes, which are dark with lust. You lean up slightly and kiss the corner of his mouth. You take a step back and prop your hands on your hips. “How do I look?”

“Beautiful,” Rafael complimented. “Oh before I forget, I got you a little something for today.” Rafael walked to the nightstand and pulled out a long black velvet box. He sat on the bed and patted the empty spot next to him. You looked at him curiously.

“What’s this?”

“Can’t a man give his girlfriend a little something to show how proud he is?”

Rafael pushed the box closer to you. You took the box and gently opened it, gasping at the sight of the diamond tennis bracelet. “Rafael, this is too much!”

“Cariño, you've worked so hard. You deserve this,” Rafael replied. He reached for the box and took out the bracelet, before motioning for your wrist.

“Thank you so much, Raf. I love it so much. And I love you.”

“I love you too.”

Rafael reached for his phone. “The Uber is downstairs. Ready to go?”

—

“Happy birthday to you,” the Tuesday group sang as you were presented with a birthday cake.

You beamed at everyone before bending slightly to blow at the lone candle. “One year… well one year and a day.”

You took the candle out and licked the end off. You then moved to the front of the room and gave an extemporaneous speech, thanking everyone from your sponsor, to your friends, and then finally Rafael.

“Today, I am one year sober. And I'd like to say it was the best year of my life. But the truth is that it was a 365-day crap storm. But I didn’t drink - believe me I wanted to. And I am working on cleaning up my messes. I am the best version of me that I’ve ever been. It sounds cheesy, but if you work the program, it really does work. Thank you all. I couldn’t have done this without you.”

—

Six weeks later

—

You tried to ignore the hum of people chatting behind you as you made a cup of coffee. You were irritated, the dull throb of a headache beginning. You repeatedly flicked the pink packet of sweetener before you tore it open. You tore it a little too roughly and sweetener spilled all over the table.

“Shit,” you mumbled. You tried to clean it up, when someone commented, interrupting you.

“First day jitters?”

You turned around and see an older woman, with greying hair. “Something like that.” After a beat you continued. “Relapse.”

“How long did you have before?”

You cocked your head. “A year.”

“I’ve had plenty of day ones myself. Now I am going on twenty three years. The program works if you work it.”

“So I’ve been told,” you murmured. You gave the woman a small thin smile, before letting out a heavy sigh and then introducing yourself.

“Maeve,” the woman replied as she extended her hand. She looked past you and to the clock behind you. “Oh, it’s about time. I’m going to go find a seat.”

You nodded and grabbed a bear claw before heading to find a seat. With Rafael angry with you, you avoided him at all costs - which meant attending different meetings. There were some familiar faces at the different meetings, which made you feel even more ashamed about your relapse.

After announcements were made, people were called on to take a chip for the amount of time of their sobriety - 6 months, 30 days, and so on. You felt as if everyone’s eyes were bored on you as you took a day 1 chip.

You sat back down and focused on the coffee cup, running the tip of your finger over the rim of the lid. You debated confessing your sins to the group but decided against it. Being there was too much, your chest was growing tight and you felt your mouth fill with saliva. The guilt of your actions gnawed at you.

Instead you chose to leave early in hopes of avoiding the possibility of running into Rafael.

You were lost in your thoughts, admittedly, not paying attention to where you were walking. You crashed into a thick, solid body, your purse dropping to the floor, the contents spilling everywhere. You recognized Rafael by the scent of his cologne, before even looking up.

You didn’t even get a chance to try to gather your items. Rafael was faster and before you knew it, he was handing your bag back to you. Your eyes met his before drinking his appearance. There was a flash of sadness on his face before it was replaced with a stoic look.

“Thanks,” you mumbled. “Appreciate it.”

Rafael spotted the chip lying by your foot. “Your chip.”

You glanced towards the fallen chip and picked it up. As you both stand, you give Rafael a small shrug. “Day one. Back to it.”

Rafael nodded. “Good for you. Take care of yourself.”

You sucked in a breath, inwardly wincing. You weren’t sure what you expected him to say, but the interaction was more miserable and painful than you had anticipated.

You gave him a small nod before continuing on. You wanted to turn back and look - but the tears threatening to spill from your eyes stopped you.

Had you looked however, you would have seen Rafael fixed gaze on you from behind.

You leaned your head against the window of the taxi. Tears threaten to spill as you recall the break of your sobriety and your relationship with Rafael.

—

You moved around your apartment, straightening up as you went. You balanced a laundry basket on your hip and tossed the clothes that laid strewn (from earlier when Rafael came over and the two of you didn’t even make it to the bedroom) about into the basket. Rafael was in the kitchen, unpacking the platters ordered. He peeked into a container, took out a piece of fruit and popped it into his mouth.

“I think having your family over for brunch is a great idea,” Rafael called out while still chewing.

“At least one of us thinks it is,” you returned with a small shout.

Rafael walked out of the kitchen. “It’s going to be fine. They’re going to be really proud of you. You have really turned your life around.”

You opened your mouth to reply when the intercom rang, signaling the arrival of your family. “They’re early. I haven’t even finished getting ready.”

You let out an irritated sigh and walked over to the intercom. Rafael grabbed your wrist gently, pausing you. He ran his hands up and down your arms.

“Go finish getting ready - I’ll greet them. It’s going to be okay, I promise.”

Later, you looked yourself over in the mirror and took a deep breath before going out to the living room. The sound of laughter caught you off guard and you entered the room cautiously.

It was the Rafael Barba show - everyone was taken by his charm. You gave a small wave. “Hey.”

Your dad was the first to hug you followed by your sister.

“I brought champagne - for mimosas,” your sister replied as the hug broke. “That’s okay right? Just because you can’t have alcohol doesn’t mean we can’t, right?”

You gave her a thin smile. “Right, absolutely. You can do whatever you want.”

Brunch seemed to go well. Everyone was cordial and pleasant but there was an underlying thick tension that caused everyone to be keyed up.

You poured yourself another cup of coffee. “So I learned that alcoholism is a disease, and, uh... boy, do I have it,”

“Disease?”

You looked over towards your sister. Her face was dripping with disdain.

“Did you just say that you have a disease? You don’t have a disease. Grandma having uterine cancer - that’s a disease.”

You nodded slowly. “Um, sorry - I just…”

Rafael coughed slightly, clearing his throat. “It is a very real, recognized disease - it’s more than just an addiction.”

Your sister turned to Rafael and arched a brow and she pursed her lips.

You put your mug down and stood. “Why don’t I bring out the pastries?”

“Why should we believe this time is different?”

“Excuse me?” You turned around. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You say you have your shit together, but how many times have we heard that before?”

“I’m trying to make amends, okay?” You replied. “An apology is just that - words. An amends is action. And I want to rebuild that bridge that I blew up with you - with everyone.” You waved your arm, gesturing to the group.

Your sister let out a scoff and crossed her arms. “I’ll believe it when I see it.”

“I think we should just go, before this becomes more,” your dad announced, now standing.

“No,” you protested. “It doesn’t have to be a thing - let’s talk.”

“I don’t know why I thought this time would be any different,” your dad continued. He stood and grabbed his keys from the table.

You barely had time to register what was happening, when everyone got up to leave, leaving you and Rafael alone, stunned.

Later that afternoon, you tried to text with your sister and hoped she’d be more reasonable, but that didn’t go well either. So when a friend invited you out, you thought it would serve you well to get out of the house. Rafael agreed, saying a change in environment might be beneficial.

—

Rafael let out a sigh as he stood in front of the group. He gripped the podium and extended his arms, rocking on his heels. “Rafael, alcoholic.”

“Hi Rafael," the group echoed.

“I really wanted to drink tonight. Why? Because of … well, my ex. I know, I know, no cross talk. It’s not about her really. It’s about that I am engaged in one of the biggest cases of my career, and I am so stressed. It used to be, pour a scotch, work on my answer tree or my closing argument. Things just flowed more easily when I drank. The booze helped me decompress. And now? I got rid of the alcohol and things got so complicated. So if it’s shit when I drink, and shit when I am sober. I might as well drink - but I won’t. I can’t. You know the saying, so and so is driving me to drink? Yeah. My ex is doing that to me. Again, I won’t, but fuck, I really, really want to.”

—

Rafael hated to drive. It didn’t mean he didn’t know how to, but he avoided it at all costs if possible. He was not a confident driver at all. But when he received a call that you were three sheets to the wind at a bar on the Queens/Long Island border, he didn’t even hesitate to hop in the car and go. Thankfully in Manhattan, you can get anything with a touch of a button and soon enough he had a rental. He weaved through traffic, blaring his horn when necessary.

Rafael dialed you again. “Please pick up,” he muttered while the phone rang. Voicemail. Now it was full.

“God damnit!” Rafael slammed his hand on the steering wheel. Eventually traffic eases and he saw the exit and changed lanes to get over. After finding parking in no-man’s land, he made his way to the bar.

There was a bouncer outside, who waved him in. The bar was a hole in the wall, with sticky floors and dirty walls. Despite smoking at indoor establishments being banned, the bar smelled like an ash-tray amongst other smells.

The bartender was wiping down the counter and looked up. He gave Rafael a once over. “Are you the boyfriend?”

Rafael nodded. “Yeah, where is she?”

The bartender pointed to a booth in the back. When Rafael found you, you were face down, leaning on an arm. You looked like shit.

“Hey,” Rafael replied gently. “It’s me.”

You looked up and gave Rafael a goofy smile. “Hey you. What are you doing here?”

“Taking you back to my place,” Rafael replied just as quietly. “Come on.”

“My - my - I need my car. My stuff is in the car.” You protested and leaned on Rafael hard, as he helped you towards his car.

“We will get your car in the morning,” Rafael replied.

The following morning you slept off your hangover, waking up well into the afternoon. There was a trash can left conveniently to the side. On the stand was a bottle of water and two painkillers. You groaned at the bright daylight that flooded your room and vision.

“How bad was I?” You questioned as you made your way out of the bedroom. You found Rafael on the couch, reading on his tablet. Your head pounded as if Tommy Lee was leading a drum solo during a Mötley Crüe tour and your mouth was dry.

“You don’t remember?”

You shook your head as you plopped on the couch next to him. You caught a whiff of the booze on you and wrinkled your nose in disgust. “No. I just thought I could handle one drink. Just one and that way I wouldn’t know I was a complete failure.”

“You know we can’t fake sobriety and tolerance. It’s all or nothing,” Rafael replied gently, placing a hand on your thigh.

Rafael began to explain everything and slowly but surely the night's events began to roll in. You supplemented what you could of Rafael’s story. And that’s when Rafael noticed your bare wrist.

“Where’s the bracelet? I thought you liked it.”

“I forgot to wear it,” you lied. Your heart began to race and immediately the guilt was setting in. “I was afraid I was going to lose it.”

“Wait, I'm confused. You forgot it or you were afraid of losing it?” Your eyes searched Rafael’s face but it was expressionless.

“Both?”

“Hang on. Where was the last place you saw them?”

You dropped your head and looked away from him, shame blooming across your face. “In the middle of a poker table.”

“What? You bet them? What the hell happened?”

“I’m sorry,” you sobbed, tears flowing freely down your cheeks. You explained how the night went from seemingly innocent to then hitting a bar where you stayed sober but then the two of you got invited to a poker game in the back that quickly spiraled.

“Listen, I'm not as strong as you. I took a bite out of the apple - this doesn’t make me a bad person.”

“I didn’t say that you were,” Rafael replied quietly.

“I don't know what to do.”

“Let's go to a meeting right now.”

“Now? I’m gross and tired. Later.”

Rafael let out a sigh. “Don’t tell me you want help and then balk at the first sign.”

“I said I am tired,” you protested weakly. “I need to shower.”

Rafael moved out of the way and began to walk out of the room. He pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes. “I need to get out of here.”

“Raf—“

Rafael looked at you, his own eyes red and brimmed with unshed tears. “You did this to yourself. I worked too hard for my sobriety. I’m sorry. I can’t be the person you need me to be.”

—-

Rafael paid no heed towards the rain which was pounding against his windows, as the accompanying wind howled fiercely. His eyes were red and brimmed with unshed tears as he leafed through the pictures on his phone.

He reached for his mug that was sitting on the nightstand next to his bed and took a sip, in hopes that the hot liquid would ease the ache in his throat. A good part of him wished it was something stronger. And he hated that you did that to him.

Putting the mug back down, Rafael looked at the number of missed calls and voicemails on his phone. He was curious to what the messages contained but he couldn't bring himself to listen.

Instead, he continued to leaf through the photos that contained wonderful memories of his relationship with you. That was all in the past now – and the happy pictures were nothing more than a painful reminder of heartbreak.

Rafael paused at one picture and fingered the edges of the photo. It happened to be a picture from when the two of you had gone on a double date with Sonny and Amanda. He remembered how fun that night was and how you were a breath of fresh air in his life.

Continuing to leaf through his phone, he found himself pausing at another photo. This time, the picture was of a concert the two of you had attended after he had surprised you with tickets to your favorite musical artist for your birthday.

"Oh my, Rafi these aren't what I think they are…" you questioned, your hand covering your mouth in shock.

"Happy Birthday cariño," Rafael replied before leaning in to kiss you. "I'll pick you up at six so we can go to dinner before the concert."

"Sounds perfect. How'd I ever get to be so lucky to have such a wonderful boyfriend like you?" you asked, hugging Rafael tightly.

"I should be asking that question, not you," Rafael murmured against your ear and you shivered slightly in his embrace.

As a result of singing on top of your lungs the entire night with the band, you lost your voice, but you didn't care. And you weren't so sure of when it happened, but you found yourself sitting on top of his shoulders. You gently swayed to the music as you played with his hair.

Before heading home, you managed to convince a stranger to take a picture of the two of you. You further treated yourself to a t-shirt from the concert and wore it to bed sans underwear. You wanted to give Rafael your version of a proper thanks.

Later, as you were curled against him in orgasmic bliss, you confessed that it had been the best birthday in a long time.

The deep vibration of the phone shook Rafael from his deep thoughts, and he looked at the caller ID, though he had an inkling as to who it was. He sighed – it was you. He debated on answering, his thumb hovering over the screen. He decided against it and dropped it immediately back onto the bed.

Rafael tossed the covers aside to return the mug now filled with tepid tea to the kitchen. He picked up a few items of laundry on the way. He heard the door open and he jumped. You were standing in the doorway.

"Christ, how'd you get in?" Rafael snapped irritably.

"I still have a copy of your keys, remember?" You replied, shaking the keys in your hand.

Rafael set down the items in his hand. “Goddamnit, do you not know boundaries? I haven’t taken your calls - take the fucking hint.”

You winced at his words. “Please, you have to listen. I’ve—“

He marched over to you and snatched the keys.

"I am sorry Raf - for everything. I came to see if we can talk about this – about us and our future. I did terrible, stupid, stupid things. I fucked up. I fucked us up. And I’m sorry, I wish I could take it back, but I can’t. I just can’t see us throwing away something we know is so damn good.” Your voice was beginning to crack.

"There's nothing to talk about. I told you it's over," Rafael mumbled as he pushed past you back towards his room. "Please leave."

You followed and grabbed his wrist arm. “Rafi, I love you, please.”

Rafael dropped his head in defeat and exhaled deeply. Those three words no longer held any meaning, instead they were void and empty – shallow reminders of what no longer existed. He let out another deep breath and turned around.

"Don't use those words as a quick fix," Rafael replied, his voice laced with anger. “Please just go.”

You nodded and headed towards the door, also defeated. You were about to leave when you turned back to him. "I'll do anything to fix this. You have to believe me when I say I am sorry. I can't imagine my life without you."

"It's too little, too late. Get used to it." Rafael replied quietly, before turning on his heels. Rafael waited in the hallway until he heard the door faintly click, indicating you had left.

Breakups are never easy, and he learned the hard way once with Yelina. But now? Forget opening up his heart in any way anymore.

For Rafael, it wasn’t worth it.

TBC.

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#rafael barba x reader #rafael barba fanfiction #rafael barba fanfic #rafael barba imagine #rafael barba and reader #rafael barba and you

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