Make them straight adjacent for the homies

Horror isekai where Perceiving the Weird Eldritch Thing gets you catapulted into a nightmare labyrinth of puzzle-solving.

I.e Those Who Perceive The Hunt of the Goblin King Must Partake In The Labyrinth and Can Only Be Freed If They Complete It In One Day and One Night. By Fae Law. For Reasons.

But the definition of “perception” clearly needs to be updated because some normal guy simply films the Hunt of the Goblin King Behind Arby’s, and puts it on Facebook -

No, not instagram or TikTok, it’s important that it be Facebook -

Because the rules are pretty clear, “the rules are the rules” as is carved ominously in elvish runes above the grim gate, and the Contract is Sealed. and so therefore the guy and 25 of their most random real-life acquaintances must run the gauntlet together. It’s Some Guy, their immediate neighbors, their first partner’s mom, their friends from hobby Facebook groups (oh this poor guy and their hobbies; the elderly birdwatchers from Facebook and the young up-and-coming drag king community), their random teen kid niece, college friends, a dog who also watched the video, a couple consisting of a woman who is the guy’s Facebook friend and showed her husband the video, and the husband doesn’t even know Some Guy, so he’s in the labyrinth and absolutely furious about being forced to be involved, and they proceed to break up over the course of the puzzle.

It’s important that the narrative keeps trying to be a sexy dark horror isekai! but within this the comedic reality of Catherine, 52, the guy’s horse-riding instructor, being passionately involved in escape-room-style puzzle solving and grappling with minor goblins. They are in fact speedrunning the gauntlet.

The Goblin King finally has to say: all right, actually, I only really set all this up to fuck with one (1) guy at a time, thanks for your willingness to participate, but I think all 25 of you can consider the gauntlet fully run.

And the group would be quite hurt by that. The rules are the rules. We have a contract, actually. Let Catherine cook.

In the most 'Greek theatre' of ways, this is a tragedy. Tragedies are meant to teach onlookers: "See how these rich idiots, despite their riches, cannot escape the consequences of their actions, their hubris, and their defiance of the laws of common sense and decency? See their awful demise? Don't be like them."

disabled people: we are still dying, can you please just wear a mask to the grocery store and doctor’s offices so we can live

conservatives: no, die or stay inside all day, no one cares

leftists: no 🏳️‍🌈✨💖

these guys

day 10: love is devotion ♡

(femslashfeb prompt list)

For your consideration.

Considering Miles is an “anomaly” and technically wasn’t supposed to become spiderman, I think that means he has a more likely chance of altering his canon (save his dad) without any disastrous ramifications

"we need more complex female characters" you couldn't even handle her

space cadet.

Pairing: OPLA!Vinsmoke Sanji x Reader Word Count: 831 words Warnings: None

reverie (noun): a state of being pleasantly lost in one's thoughts; a daydream

You imagine the thoughts in your head as a forest of kelp at the bottom of the sea: dense, beautiful, brimming with life and all too easy to get lost in.

They’ve caused you trouble in the past. Countless rapped knuckles, letters sent home to your parents, walking into trees on the way home from school. But how could you resist? Empires rose and fell over the course of an hour inside your mind, mighty beasts swore their allegiance to you and the four seas were yours to explore. The childhood you had in the real world was so dull and lonely in comparison.

When you ran off and joined the Straw Hats, you finally had the excitement you had so craved. And yet, even now, your mind still wanders.

“If you swab the deck any more, we won’t have any left, sweetheart.”

Only a select few can bring you back.

You blink rapidly, the clouds dissipating as you stop scrubbing and look up. Sanji’s already smiling when you meet his gaze.

He lifts his hands; one offers a plate of shortbread cookies, the other a glass of milk.

“I’m going to guess that you haven’t had a break in a while,” he says. “Am I right?”

A break? Sending him a perplexed frown, you lean on the handle of your scrub brush and glance over your shoulder.

The side on which you had started winks back at you from afar, wood gleaming under the afternoon sun.

Oh.

“I … I guess so,” you reply slowly, turning back to him. It’s only then that you register the saltwater washing over your feet and the ache in your muscles. “I didn’t even realize …”

He shakes his head and chuckles, leading you to some nearby crates to sit down. “Too caught up in your stories again? I’m almost jealous that they get to spend so much time with you.”

“I don’t mean to make you worry.”

“Loving someone means worrying about them from time to time.”

He winks, and you smile, flustered.

“I see,” you say quietly. “Then thank you for worrying, Sanji.”

“Of course.” He hands you the glass of milk, then picks up a cookie and taps it against your lips. “Now, this is my best batch of sablés. You have no idea how hard it was to keep Luffy from eating them all in the kitchen.”

“I have some idea,” you drawl amusedly, taking a bite.

The cookie breaks with a gentle snap. It crumbles delightfully in your mouth, sugar and butter dancing on your tongue. A pleased hum rumbles in your throat before you wash it down with a gulp of cold milk.

“What do you think?”

“I think I might eat the whole plate right now,” you say, taking the other half of the cookie.

He grins. “So you like them.”

“They’re delicious.” Picking up another one, you hold it in front of his face. “Here.”

Sanji’s gaze remains locked with yours as he leans forward to take a bite of the cookie, his lips brushing your fingertips in an impromptu kiss before he pulls away. He chews thoughtfully. The action should not look as good as it does.

“My best batch, as I’ve said,” he tells you once he swallows. “But I’ve tasted sweeter.”

You tilt your head. “Where?”

His mouth curls into a smirk, and he places his fingers under your chin to bring your face closer to his. Your noses touch and you can feel his answer against your lips as he murmurs, “Right here.”

The rest of the crew may also have the pleasure of eating Sanji’s food, but they do not share your privilege of knowing just how talented he is at kissing.

He sets down the plate and lifts his hand to cup your jaw, meeting your lips and letting out a soft sigh before pressing his lips more fervently against yours. You can taste the smoke on his tongue, a constant underneath the warm sweetness of sugar and the saltiness of butter. Your eyes flutter closed, and you reach up to cradle the back of his head, fingers tangling in his hair and tugging slightly. The groan he lets out sends tingles down to the tips of your toes.

“Sweetheart,” he pants, and the longing in his voice would’ve made your knees buckle if you were standing, “I won’t be able to stop if you keep doing that.”

You put your glass of milk down so you can bury both hands in his golden hair. Your forehead touches his. “Maybe that’s a good thing.”

“Maybe it is,” he mutters.

You bring him back in for another searing kiss that Sanji returns just as eagerly.

Yes, you value your time alone with your thoughts. They are a forest of kelp at the bottom of the sea, beautiful, countless, and wild.

But as easy as it is to get lost in your thoughts, it is infinitely easier to get lost in him.

wayne brady is pansexual!!! 💗💛💙🥳

i’m pansexual. in doing my research, both with myself and just with the world, i couldn’t say if i was bisexual, because i had to really see what that was, especially because i really have not gotten a chance to act on anything. so, i came to pansexual because — and i know that i’m completely messing up the dictionary meaning — but to me, pan means being able to be attracted to anyone who identifies as gay, straight, bi, transsexual or non-binary. being able to be attracted across the board. and, i think, at least for me for right now, that is the proper place. i took pan to mean that not only can i be attracted to any of these people or types physically, but i could be attracted to the person that is there. i’ve dealt with the shame. a shame cake, just eating it every single day — and then worried about… people finding out. i’ve always had a wonderful community of friends who are in the lgbtq+ community, people that i’ve grown up with in shows, gays and lesbians, and, later in life, my trans relatives and my niece. i’ve always had that community, but i've always felt like a sham because i wasn’t being forthcoming with myself. i could speak out about black issues because i can’t hide that. and you can play at being an ally, but until the day that you can truly say, “this is who i am, and i wanna stand next to you,” that's not… i always wanted that day to come. i’ve told myself in the past, also, nobody needs to know my personal business. the world can absolutely go without knowing that wayne identifies as pan. but that gave me license to still live in the shadows and to be secretive. what does that feel like to actually not be shameful, to not feel like, “oh, i can’t be part of this conversation because i’m lying?” i had to break that behavior. i’m now trying to be the most wayne brady i can be. i don’t know about most, actually. i’m still coming together. but if i’m healthy, then i can go onstage at let’s make a deal and be the best wayne brady that everybody wants and expects. i can be the best dad that maile needs. i can be the best friend to mandie, the best son to my mother, and one day, the best partner to someone, because i’m doing this for me. not dating yet though! [laughs] i am single, but it’s not about being with someone right now. i’ve got some work to do still. then, wayne as a single, open-minded pansexual can make a decision and be free and open to other people.

i included more quotes from the article than just strictly pan related because it’s quite touching. good for him!!!! 🌈👏🥰

Apollo (about Phoenix): yeah he’s my sister’s dad

Athena: so he’s your dad?

Apollo: he’s my sister’s dad

doe eyes (threatening)

quick nerys study <3

uh