I wish more ppl on political debates just did this

umm how to be a dog by andrew kane. btw.

Peacocks are hilarious, really. They really are just like

Brother Gregor never spoke and often spooked the neophytes with his appearance, but he was a gentle soul and a phenomenal cook and knew more ways to prepare a fish than the abbot knew hymns

Sea-Wing

some sort of earthworm woim, with leggie like arm tentacles and flatwormie eye spots

I love the Merlin app too (but not enough to try to get it to listen to tumblr on the same phone while cooking heuvos rancheros for a family of five on a Saturday morning, so hats off if you tried this.) my kids like to ask if they can CATCH BIRDS with it and then prance around outdoors holding my phone up “catching birds” while I go HMM okay!! Hope the phone case is Exactly as tough as the marketing material makes it out to be !!

i couldn't get an answer on mastodon-

anyone know what kinds of birds thesse are based on their call?

seem to be migratory

also anyone know why they seemed so confused about hwere they should be going?

eventually they did move along, but i didn't see which way as i had gone back inside by the time they left.

recorded in grays harbor county, washington

uhh... bird ppl...

@elodieunderglass maybe?

I like this!!

i couldn't get an answer on mastodon-

anyone know what kinds of birds thesse are based on their call?

seem to be migratory

also anyone know why they seemed so confused about hwere they should be going?

eventually they did move along, but i didn't see which way as i had gone back inside by the time they left.

recorded in grays harbor county, washington

uhh... bird ppl...

@elodieunderglass maybe?

That’s Not My Prophet?

Honestly thought I'd never hear the word "usborne" again. My mom used to live and breathe that company, and while I certainly don't regret a fair chunk, I do find it amusing as I look back now. I legitimately thought it had fallen off faster than Juice+.

In reference to a post where i mention my kid has the usborne “see inside germs” book.

So if people don’t know, usborne is a weird publishing company that has done indispensable books for British children for generations; they’re in every library, school and nursery, and have shelves devoted to them in every bookstore. They are how many people learned to read, and are the originators of many hyper focuses. They’re famed for doing educational lift the flap books for all ages, like “see inside your body”, as well as as the ubiquitous touch-and-feel series, “that’s not my….” In which a mouse comments improbably on various creatures not being their creature. “That’s not my dragon,” the mouse says, inviting you to stroke a dragon with a patch of fur on it, “its tummy is too soft. That’s not my dragon,” on the next page, where the dragon’s ears are lined with textured paper, “its ears are too bumpy.” This seems like such an inefficient way to find one’s missing dragon, a fact that simmers underneath you through endless repetition. Why does the mouse own so many things (pirates, ducks, polar bears) and why is it interrogating other people’s pirates etc by feeling their legs.

At any rate, turn a parents’ house upside down and these books fall out.

Which is why it’s completely hilarious that they are also an MLM.

Well. Kind of. In the old school sense. It’s less about signing up a pyramid scheme and more about getting a random citizen to buy a crate of perfectly popular books and try to sell them on from their home. It’s very traditional for Mums On Maternity Leave to do this. Pre-social media and online ordering, they’d hook up other mums at toddler group. Today, they post awkwardly on social media. The idea is that buying from another parent is cheaper than the bookstore, and they get to keep the markup. They get intense about things, and I believe they attend conferences. Nobody makes a huge amount of money and it’s unclear how undercutting local bookstores is helpful; it’s also basically the same RRP as Amazon I think.

And the books are perfectly respectable and sell perfectly well in bookstores.

So. Like. This marketing scheme is completely weird. Why?? Why does it still exist? People buy the books normally! You don’t need to promote them aggressively! You don’t need elaborate independent local middlemen schemes! You can just buy them! I have never understood this. I just file it under one of those weird mat leave hustles.

But don’t worry OP. They’re still going. They’ll never stop. The thing is that your mom got bored and online sales probably ate whatever residual profit margins were left and it’s probably very liberating for everyone to grow out of the “that’s not my cow” stage, but Usborne books are going strong.

Yes! I’m almost certain it’s the mouse steering the narrative by searching for its lost possessions; it’s in every book and every page and seems to be the driving force here. however, with that context, it’s even more of a deranged way to find one’s animal through the process of elimination-by-texture. “That’s not my cow! Its udders are tooOooo smooth!” is a dogfuck pissant radiant bonkers way to find your cow. Not just for a mouse (especially for a mouse) not just for someone who might theoretically be visually impaired (especially for a mouse) but also the implication that knowing the precise smoothness of the familiar beast’s tits is the knowledge that we’re groping for here. please join me in condemning this methodology as both unscrupulous and peculiar.

Because a few people asked: is this what Terry Pratchett references with “Where’s my Cow”, an in-universe children’s book with a similar sort of mission, though an improvement in the methodology (“where’s my cow / is that my cow? / it goes HRUUUGH / it is a hippopotamus. That is not my cow”)

I can’t say because this sort of narrative and cadence are very continuous across the landscape of baby books. The evolutionary traits are fixed in character here. However the cadence is very similar and I referenced it myself! So here is a video of someone stroking, patting and scratching their way through a process of cow identification with Usborne, for you to decide.

Also note; you’re supposed to read the cover like it’s the first page of the story! Lots of people don’t know this and the reader here does it properly.

Honestly thought I'd never hear the word "usborne" again. My mom used to live and breathe that company, and while I certainly don't regret a fair chunk, I do find it amusing as I look back now. I legitimately thought it had fallen off faster than Juice+.

In reference to a post where i mention my kid has the usborne “see inside germs” book.

So if people don’t know, usborne is a weird publishing company that has done indispensable books for British children for generations; they’re in every library, school and nursery, and have shelves devoted to them in every bookstore. They are how many people learned to read, and are the originators of many hyper focuses. They’re famed for doing educational lift the flap books for all ages, like “see inside your body”, as well as as the ubiquitous touch-and-feel series, “that’s not my….” In which a mouse comments improbably on various creatures not being their creature. “That’s not my dragon,” the mouse says, inviting you to stroke a dragon with a patch of fur on it, “its tummy is too soft. That’s not my dragon,” on the next page, where the dragon’s ears are lined with textured paper, “its ears are too bumpy.” This seems like such an inefficient way to find one’s missing dragon, a fact that simmers underneath you through endless repetition. Why does the mouse own so many things (pirates, ducks, polar bears) and why is it interrogating other people’s pirates etc by feeling their legs.

At any rate, turn a parents’ house upside down and these books fall out.

Which is why it’s completely hilarious that they are also an MLM.

Well. Kind of. In the old school sense. It’s less about signing up a pyramid scheme and more about getting a random citizen to buy a crate of perfectly popular books and try to sell them on from their home. It’s very traditional for Mums On Maternity Leave to do this. Pre-social media and online ordering, they’d hook up other mums at toddler group. Today, they post awkwardly on social media. The idea is that buying from another parent is cheaper than the bookstore, and they get to keep the markup. They get intense about things, and I believe they attend conferences. Nobody makes a huge amount of money and it’s unclear how undercutting local bookstores is helpful; it’s also basically the same RRP as Amazon I think.

And the books are perfectly respectable and sell perfectly well in bookstores.

So. Like. This marketing scheme is completely weird. Why?? Why does it still exist? People buy the books normally! You don’t need to promote them aggressively! You don’t need elaborate independent local middlemen schemes! You can just buy them! I have never understood this. I just file it under one of those weird mat leave hustles.

But don’t worry OP. They’re still going. They’ll never stop. The thing is that your mom got bored and online sales probably ate whatever residual profit margins were left and it’s probably very liberating for everyone to grow out of the “that’s not my cow” stage, but Usborne books are going strong.

Fuck it. Crochet cartilaginous stingray skeleton

Exceedingly cursed decor in this AirBnb.

I’m not super familiar with birds of the western USA, so we’ll throw this one out to the public, but in the meantime: please consider the American White Pelican!

In addition to being a trustworthy receptacle for your baby, there is a guy in the Christian Bible who expresses his sadness by saying “I am like a pelican in the wilderness; like an owl in the waste places; like a sparrow alone on the house top; haters are relentless; guess I’ll go eat worms” etc

And of course Edward Lear writes:

Ploffskin, Pluffskin, Pelican jee!

We think no Birds so happy as we!

Plumpskin, Ploshkin, Pelican jill!

We think so then, and we thought so still!

So I’m sure that explains it.

i couldn't get an answer on mastodon-

anyone know what kinds of birds thesse are based on their call?

seem to be migratory

also anyone know why they seemed so confused about hwere they should be going?

eventually they did move along, but i didn't see which way as i had gone back inside by the time they left.

recorded in grays harbor county, washington

uhh... bird ppl...

@elodieunderglass maybe?

Aww my kids have that puddlesuit too