Guys, guys! I found Geralt's baby picture! Behold, baby Witcher Geralt!

(This is a Potoo chick, for those who don't get the joke 😉)

Hope you don't mind me using potoo!Geralt @fandom-junk-drawer. The fandom is quiet and I am bored so I'm just tossing these out there.

Enjoy! Or curse me for making you guys see it. Either one is fine :)

His friends call him Potooralt.

twn thoughts, in no order:

1. god i love aretuza and all the wretched sluts there <333333

2. thanedd ep was VERY good

3. this season was so unbelievably gay?? so many lesbians in particular, really appreciated that. also obviously appreciated jaskier/radovid even if radovid is discount lestat. he had charm! and the part of me that is forever 13 will always cheer when the boy i like on a show kisses another boy, i cannot deny this. (also “then take me here” was smooth as all hell, damn.)

3a. but like. everything was gay. all the sorceresses were so gay and emhyr and cahir were gay in a really nasty way (that i love) and valdo and jaskier were gay rivals and you KNOW yennefer and sabrina have banged before and also tissaia and philippa are exes. i don’t know where the hard left turn into homosexual propaganda came from but im LOVING it

4. love love love that ciri is becoming a fully developed Person with flaws and characteristics and not just Fantasy Girl Protagonist, i am absolutely dying to see her with the Rats

4a. OH AND ALSO MISTLE. MISTLE WAS GAY AND GORGEOUS AND ASTOUNDING. BRING ME MORE OF HER POSTHASTE

5. the yen & ciri fight was SO real it was hard to watch, like that is mother-daughter pain coming from someone who clearly knows it. that is just so--right down to the “dad” being idealized bc he doesn’t have to compromise his principles, bc men can get away with that. the gender of it all almost makes me sad that they seem to be dropping the creepy “ciri’s magical womb” element of the plot bc honestly i think they could handle it well, they SEE women so clearly. like aside from jaskier, who is just down to a very fun performance, the weakest points of this show are and have always been the white men, this show is about women!!!!

6. i got mixed up for a second and thought “can’t wait for part 2, i want liamralt” and that should tell you how i feel about twn geralt lmao. hcav was less actively offensive to watch than in s2, at least, although a lot of that is bc he didn’t have the potoo contacts and ab armor, not bc he actually did any better. but whatever this show is about Women so he doesn’t matter.

Top 5 local birds!

tits

tits again because

hetflix witcher geralt potoos

okay we dont have potoos here unfortunately but monti just made me watch s2 and i still havent recovered

my friend's cockatiel who screams during dnd

i hope they’ve fixed the contact lenses issue because i CANNOT let henry cavill’s last stretch as geralt of rivia be ruined by eye-acting-blocker yellow potoo eyes please i won’t survive it please let us have this one last thing

i honestly feel for the people who are genuinely sad about this news and I feel like a fucking monster or smth because this is hilarious to me

I wasn't a fan of Henry anyway, I've been a fan of the Witcher since 2010 and I'm so attached to game Geralt that when I heard they cast Henry Cavill I was like .... no thank you

and now he goes and Liam takes over and I have the same response.

Game Geralt is superior to me, at least he has feelings and doesn't look like a goddamn potoo. the show fucking sucks guys, we ain't missing anything....

Geralt has never been Henry for me, Henry has never been Geralt for me. and that will never change. Geralt is Geralt. all the show ever did was make me love Jaskier more because Joey did such an outstanding job

Ever since I read the potoo post I cant see a single gif of geralt without bursting out laughing. He has potoo eyes I'm sorry I can't take him seriously at all

I'm sick at home today, so i'm being productive. Here's some Potoo Head Geralt and Gullskier!

(Potoo Head Geralt by me. Gullskier belongs to @blaidd-gwyn

so many of the emotional geralt scenes in s2 would have been so much more emotional if he didn't have the eyes of a fucking potoo

this is not the most relevant of all the criticisms I have but it is the most amusing

The more I see gifs from The Witcher season 2 the more I am thankful for Joey Batey's beautiful expressive blue eyes. And that the twn makeup team stayed away from him with their cheap cosplay level contact lenses.

bad haircut choice is where I draw the line. duh

saw someone call netflix geralt a potoo and i couldn't rest until i made this meme

ok i thought i was done posting negative takes about twn s2 but apparently i’m going to die angry about those fucking potoo contacts they slapped over geralt’s eyes in almost every scene. like i’m sitting here thinking about a fic idea and trying to picture the intense emotional eye contact and it’s just those dead yellow clown eyes. christ

like who thought it was a good idea to put henry OF ALL PEOPLE in something that muted all emotional expression in his eyes??? it’s like if in harrison bergeron they put MORE chains on the dancers with the LEAST natural ability.......like at that point you’re just being mean

I figured it was time for some S3 Potoo Head Geralt!

Yennefer can't take him anywhere.