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bongugourokishima33 · 4 years

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Wicked Games | Bakugou Katsuki

Summary: Bakugou did something stupid and now he’s trying his hardest to fix it... in his own explosive angry boy way~

Warning: Angst, cheating, thick f!reader, slight smut (maybe...)

Word Count: 1,882

A/N: Bakugou x reader x Todoroki... It’s been a minute but I have a lot of draft works. I hope you enjoy this one! Tagging is not my specialty... you guys should know this by now, I try though! Umm, this is going to be for all my thick babes out (though if not don’t worry you can change that in your mind) thick thighs save lives, and my gay ass just wants to have a fic out there that mentions it.

P.S: I’m taking some requests, starting with fluff shit first so feel free to request (I really only write about Todoroki, Bakugou, and Kirishima...)

‘Y/N! Stop damn it, it’s not what it looks like!’

‘Y/N!’

‘Y/N!!’

Your eyes fluttered open to the light from the window that shined on your face. Shit... another night of hell, another morning waking up feeling like shit. The gross images from that awful day keep playing through your head over and over, there wasn’t a night that they don’t replay in your mind.

Sliding up out of bed and slipping on some shorts and a baggy t-shirt, you tossed your hair up into a messy bun and walked out the room of your dorm. It’s been months since that dreadful night, but you still couldn’t get over the pain that lingered in your heart after it broke into pieces.

At first, everyone was concerned, noticed that you and him stopped being all over each other, you two wouldn’t even look in each others direction. They suspected what happened and kept their mouths shut. Your best friends, Mina and Jiro especially knowing that when the time comes you will talk to them about what happened sooner or later, but you're later was never.

“Y/N!” Mina smiled sitting at one of the tables eating breakfast, You gave her a soft smile and scanned the room, looking for the only person who could make your hellish night better.

“He’s in the common area, love,” Mina smirked giving you a wink, which made you slightly blush.

You strolled down the hall and made a left seeing him sitting on the couch, tapping away on his phone, Kaminari, and Ojiro sitting across from him on a different couch.

“Yoo, Y/N you look... horrible,” Kaminari said noticing your puffy red eyes, and resting bitch face look, you flipped him off and stood in front of the icey hot hubby.

“Roki...” You mumbled out dryly, your voice slightly cracking.

Without looking up from his phone, he opened his arms up and you sat down in his lap, straddling his waist as you curled up into his chest. His arms wrapped around your waist, and his smell fills your nose as you rested your face into his neck.

“Nightmare?” He asked, whispering into your ear, you nodded melting into the comforting kiss he planted on your head.

“You know there is a thing called your room you can do all that in.,” Kaminari said frowning.

“You’re just jealous you don’t have someone to do that with.” Ojiro chuckled as Kaminari glared at him in protest.

“I’m sorry” You felt the tears starting to prick at your eyes.

You always said sorry, anytime thoughts of him ran through your mind you tore yourself up. It wasn’t right, the feelings, the love you still have for the one who ripped your heart of your chest. Todoroki knows, and still loves you, and comforts you and even lets you vent to him. He’s incredible, and you don’t deserve him for all that’s he’s done for you.

“Don’t be.” You could feel his arms move, knowing he placed his phone down to give you his full attention. Snaking his feelings up your baggy shirt to caress your sides he leaned down to place a kiss on your lips, your head still trying to hide against his neck.

He won’t ever admit it to you, how much it hurts that you still think about Bakugou, that you still love him. He knows it’s not going to do anything to change your feelings about him, but he can’t help his feelings for you and he will always love you.

Guiding your face out from hiding with your chin, he made you face him. Kissing you tenderly he rubbed his thumb over your cheek. You kissed back wrapping your arms around his neck, your stomach tingling slightly at the loving assault of his lips on yours.

“I’m telling you, man, that wrestling match was crazy cool!.” Todoroki broke away after hearing Kirishima’s voice, you glanced over the two-color hair boy and saw him walking into the open space, Bakugou beside him.

“Yeah whatever, I’m still not watching it dumb ass,” Bakugou grumbled running his fingers through his hair. His eyes trailed over to you, locking gazes with one another. You looked away and continued to kiss Todoroki, trying to get the images of that night that popped back into your head out.

Even though no one will ever know, besides Bakugou himself, it pissed him off seeing you with someone else besides him. Knowing all too well that it was his fault that things happened the way it did.

“Dude... why don’t you just go talk to her, it’s been months you need to apologize.” Kirishima said mumbling to him as they continued to walk away from the common area.

“Shut the hell up.” Bakugou snarled lowly,

Pulling out his phone, unlocking it to see a background picture of you guys still on his phone.

“The longer you wait the harder it will be for you to do something about it.” Kirishima said sighing as they continued walking.

~~~

“Is there a reason why you guys called me here?” You asked looking at all the girls piled in Jiros room, as you stood by the door resting your back against it as it was closed.

“Look, we’ve been friends for years since we were little, and I’m tired of seeing you this hurt over a dumb ass.” Jiro said getting up and placing her hands into yours.

“Jiro...” You signed hating how everyone is starting to hate him, even though you shouldn’t care and you should feel the same too.

“Don’t, you need to stop defending him, he’s not yours anymore, and he doesn’t deserve your kindness.” Mina said waging her finger.

“Jiro said you love singing, and you used to make music when you guys were younger... so we thought let’s make some music!” Ochaco blushed shrugging her shoulders.

You stared at everyone blankly and shook your head, holding your hands up.

“No, not happening.” The thought of singing again sadly hurt now

“Nope, he’s not gonna take another thing away from you, yes he used to listen to you sing, and you guys had your whatever... but don’t let that ruin your hobby, you're talented and you need this.” Jiro huffed grabbing your arm and her guitar. The rest of the girls grabbing more instruments from Jiro’s closet.

“W-where are we going?!” Leading you out the room, the girls dragged you down the halls and down to the common area, moving stuff around and setting up some stuff.

“No one’s here, they are practicing and improving their new super moves... I talked with Aizawa and we got this whole place for a few hours to ourselves. So let’s make some music.” Jiro smiled looking at Momo who came out of the from the kitchen area with a tray full of tea cups and snacks.

“Yeah this will be fun... come on.” Mina said handing you the mic.

“Okay.” You licked your lips biting them after, trying to ignore the nasty gut feeling you had.

After the breakup, when you had time you spent it alone working on a new song that was just for you. You never thought about making it known to anyone, or wanting to ever think about singing after making it.

“Yeah, so after this chorus you can come in, playing like this...” You said showing Momo the right notes to play smiling at how things were going after an hour of teaching everyone how to play the melody.

“Like this?” She asked making you smile as you nodded loving the beat of the music.

“Perfect, then it’s goes on repeat like the first verse, then the song ends.” You grinned.

“Well, let’s hear what you wrote I think were ready.” Jiro smiled, noticing yours on your face.

“I don’t know guys...” You fiddled with the keys on the piano

“Get over there and sing!” Mina groaned shoving you towards the mic, you sighed knowing you had no choice and picked it up sitting on the stool they set beside the mic stand.

Jiro smirked and started playing, queuing everyone in moments after, you took a deep breath and brought the mic up to your lips.

“ You love to be a trouble maker Leaving now then fuck me later It's always later later later And I let you come back 'Cause sticking 'round is in my nature And tolerating bad behavior You know that I do that You love that I do that”

The memories of how Bakugou would dismiss you randomly, or not text back like he used too flooded your mind.

“ Yooouuu, you know my weaknesses You banking a break of my rules Yes you take advantage Know how to manage My whole fucking planet”

The feeling of the music, matching the words you sang made your heartach, missing his arms that wrapped around you. That held you when you were feeling down, or happy. His smell that would fill your nose when you breathed in his scent.

“ You've been playing wicked games You know what to do to me I tried to stay steady I'ma leave but you Try to make me misbehave Fucking up my energy One day I'll be over all them wicked games, yeah”

That horrible night popping back up into your mind as your sang your heart out, subtle tears falling down your cheeks remembering how he had that girl under him. How her voice sang his stupid name, the ways your did when you were in her position.

“ Always show up when I'm fending And in the moment it's appealing But you're so good disappearing And I'm just so bad at the truth you know my weaknesses You banking a break of my rules Yes you take advantage Know how to manage my whole fucking planet”

Everyone stared at you, silently tearing up as they listened to your words.

“ You've been playing wicked games...” You sang softly, lowering the mic as you shook your head not wanting to continue, trying to hold onto yourself so you didn’t break down and cry in front of everyone.

Ochaco and Momo rushing over to you to hug you and comfort you, as you let the tears run down your face, hating how your heart was breaking all over again. You stayed in their arms for a moment but knowing that it’s not their arms you wanna be in made it even harder.

“Let’s stop for now.” Jiro spoke softly smiling sympathetically and walked up to you and moved some of your hair out of your face.

“I need to go lay down.” You whispered breaking free from their arms and making your way to your room, holding back your screams. Once you saw your door you ran, opening it and shutting it closed locking it. it wasn’t fair at all, what happened, you didn’t deserve it and you knew you didn’t.

Teary eyes blurring your vision as you slide down to the floor and cried in your arms, knowing that things will never be the same again.

“Y/N”

You snapped your head up, your heart racing as you blinked away the water from your eyes to see Bakugou sitting on your bed.

“B-bakugou?”

#bnha x reader #bnha #mha imagines #bakugou katsuki #bakugou x reader #todoroki x reader

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vinyls-and-valentines · 4 years

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I felt like absolute crap when i started writing this, so have some emotional support funpoison for the s o u l ~

Description: A story about running away, teenage romance and new found family. (it’s all like 70% fluff)

Warning(s): swearing, canon-typical violence

Tagging: @always-and-forever-a-killjoy, @wishiwasthemoon-tonight

P.S. This ended up being reeeaaaally long, so be advised. You can also find this on my ao3.

“Run away with me.“

Ghoul stared at Poison in disbelief, still partially trying to process what they had just said. The two teens had known each other for a few months at that point, meeting down in the Lobby as often as they could and hanging out on vacant rooftops, talking about whatever came to mind. This, however, was way past petty curiousity and teenage infatuation- no, what Poison was asking him was as permanent as ink on skin and made his heart thump in his throat with a mix of anticipation and uncertainty.

“Are you sure about this?“ Ghoul mumbled, biting his tongue to stop it from betraying how much he wanted to just accept their offer right then and there; consequences be damned.

Poison staggered back a step, as if the question took them by surprise, and adjusted the strap of their bag nevously over their shoulder.

“Yes.“ they answered eventually,uncertainty lacing their voice, as leaned on the wall behind them and tilted their head back so they were looking at the sky, “It’s just-“ they sighed, a frown settling over their features and screwing their eyes shut, “Everything’s the same every fucking day and I try so hard to ignore it, but-“

“It’s suffocating.“ Ghoul finished the sentence for them and they hummed as confirmation that was what they were going to say.

Silence settled between the teens- tense like the air before a big storm comes barreling in from over the horizon- though neither of them seemed to have any intention of breaking it, too far gone inside their own heads. Still, the night wasn’t getting any younger and Ghoul was starting to grow antsy by the minute as a single question revertebrated in his mind.

“Why me, though?“ he asked quietly, sitting down onto the pavement next to them and pulling his knees to his chest. He wasn’t sure he wanted to know the answer, but the cat was out of the bag and there was no turning back now.

Poison’s head jerked in his direction, staring at him wide-eyed with a light pink blush starting to creep on their face. They mumbled something under their breath Ghoul couldn’t quite make out before taking a deep breath.

“Uh, well, you see, the reason I’m asking is because umm...I’ve been thinking and I- it’s because I like you.“ they squeaked out the last part, tensing up and closing their eyes again, as if what they had said would make Ghoul want to punch them.

It didn’t, the younger taking their hand in his instead and giving it a light squeeze. “I like you too.” he confessed when Poison looked back at them- albeit feeling a little more flustered than the former- and they exchanged a content smile.

Ghoul sat up and dusted off his jeans before re-entertwining his fingers with the other’s, absentmindedly swinging their hands back and forward as he led them through the maze of streets that was the Lobby. It was peaceful and while he would’ve usually found the thought boring, there was something about the feeling of Poison’s hand in his that he doubted he’d ever grow tired of.

Poson wore a smile that mirrored his as they watched him with nothing short of infatuation, making the shorter look away blushing every time their eyes met. It was dumb and cliche, but it didn’t matter as they walked under the city lights together. Still, all good things have to come to an end and as the train station came into view they had to let go of each other, pulling up thier hoods to cover their faces and trying their hardest not to just reach for the other’s hand as they quickly made their way across the street and up the station’s stairs.

The line was empty, not even a scarecrow in sight, but the company still kept out a watchful eye through the lenses of the cameras hanging from the celling like treacherous electronic spiders. Ghoul had never been Better Living’s greatest fan- hence why he spent most his nights down in the Lobby with all the juvies and ritalins even long before he had met Poison- but that night he felt even angrier at the company as he sat on the opposite side from Poison and had to act like he didn’t even know them.

It wasn’t fair, and as they waited for the train to arrive he realised anger wasn’t the only thing that he was feeling; he was tired. Tired of sneaking out in the middle of the night, tired of having to hide, tired of pretending he was something he wasn’t. If he had doubts about leaving the pristine hell of his City before, they were all gone from his mind by the time the train arrived and he shuffled behind Poison as they got on.

The train was as empty as the line they boarded it from, but ultimately that was to be expected of the midnight ride. Ghoul never understood why the train was still online so far past the curfew, but he prefered not too think about it too much for his own sake, instead learning much more useful things such as where the seat in the cameras blind spot was.

With a subtle nod, he pointed Poison in the direction of it and by some miracle they understood, even if they didn’t quite follow what Ghoul’s plan was- they’d find out soon enough, though. Looking furtively both ways as if to check there truly was no one else in the train, the younger crawled onto their lap, setting his knees on either side of them and using their shoulders to stead himself as he shifted trying to find a position he wouldn’t fall off when the train started. Once he was comfortable enough, he looked up at Poison who was blushing brght red and staring at him with an expression he couldn’t quite read, and maybe it was because it was so late at night or the way that the light hit Poison’s face that made him swear they looked like one of Destroya’s angels, but words just spilled out of Ghoul’s mouth, filter long left on the corner of some random street in the Lobby.

“Red looks good on you.“ he mumbled quietly, so the cameras would hear- but even if they did they probably wouldn’t have thought anymore of it than one of the rare heterosexual juvie couples talking nonsense to each other. The thought was amusing, yet daunting at the same time.

“Yeah,“ Poison replied, breaking him out of his thoughts just in time to see the way their gaze flickered between his eyes and his lips, “Maybe I’ll do something about it then...“

“Maybe.“ Ghoul hummed in agreement. He hadn’t noticed before how close they were- all he would’ve had to do is slightly lean forward and their lips would’ve touched.

Swallowing thickly, he spoke up again, “Can I...” he trailed off, the question getting lost along with him somewhere in the latter’s eyes, but they seemed to understand regardless as they closed the gap between them into a kiss.

It was sloppy at first, only falling somewhat in sync before they ultimately had to pull away to breathe, but it didn’t matter. It didn’t matter because it was them, hidden in the shitty fluorescent lights of a midnight train with Ghoul in Poison’s lap and his arms around their neck as they kept their hands on his waist to keep him from falling. It wasn’t perfect and neither were they, so maybe that was the point of why that night ever even happened in the first place.

Ghoul took a moment to look at Poison- really look at them- before exhaling an “I really like you.” and burying his face in the crook of the latter’s neck, making both of their hoods slip off. Poison only giggled, replying they really liked him too, and shifted in their seat in such a way one of their arms was wraped around the smaller’s waist and their other hand finding its way in his hair, fidgeting with the dark strands.

The train eventually took off, starting their ride towards the Neon District, as the two teens sat cuddled together and talked quietly about how their life was going to be like once they made it into the desert. It was all wishful thinking, but they were still too young, still too caught up in trying to escape, that they didn’t notice. Everything would be exhilerating color and living loudly like they never were allowed to before. They’d be free and they’d be together and they wouldn’t have to hide anymore. Wouldn’t that have been nice?

When they arrived at the station in the upper class district, the lights shone so brightly you couldn’t even tell if it was supposed to be day or night, reflecting off the white tiled walls and giving them almost a glow of sorts. Poison was perplexed, squinting in the fluorscent white as they put up their hood again, while Ghoul did the same and grabbed their hand, leading them along toward the apartament him and his family lived in.

The streets were as empty as the station, but not nearly as bright, with white concrete apartament buildings towering tall over them like ivory husks threatening to tear through the dark fabric of the night sky. They were the tallest buildings Poison had ever seen, making the ones back in the the Lobby seem dwarfish in comparison. It wasn’t somewhere where they would’ve expected Ghoul to live, but then again they didn’t know much about him at all and the thought made their guts twist uncomfortably. Still, when he looked at them with those big green eyes and smiled, it felt like they had forever to learn all about him.

The two stopped in front of one of the 14 story buildings and Ghoul got on the very tip of his toes to give the latter a peck on the cheek before running off inside with a promise he’d be return as fast as he could. After what felt like a small eternity, the elevator arrived with a ding and the teenager got in, biting his nails nervously as the numbers on the electronic display went up once with the anxiety he’d buried deep in the back of his throat.

When the ding rang out again, Ghoul just about jumped six feet in the air before regaining his composure with shakey breaths and hands. Suddenly he was aware of just how loud his footsteps echoed through the empty hallway as he quickly shuffled to his apartament and slid his key card into the lock mechanism, opening the door with a click and sliding inside. Trailing his hand along the wall, he made his way through the darkness- careful to take four extra steps once his fingers hit the livingroom doorframe as to not knock over his mother’s vase- and back into his room.

The few non-white items of clothing were quickly thrown into his schoolbag along with the spare binder he’d gotten for his birthday last year from one of his friends. Kneeling down next to his bed, he pulled out an old shoebox from underneath and pocketed the small switchblade inside it before dumping the rest of its contents inside the bag. He gave his room a final look, realising that without all the things carefully sat in his bag it was no longer his room- that it never quite was.

Poison was exactly where he’d left them and Ghoul couldn’t help but smile as his heart skipped a beat upon seeing them awkwardly shifting on their feet like an adorable lost puppy. Quietly, he tried to sneak up on them, but they turned around at the last moment, catching him in their arms as he tried to jump on them and spun him around, making them both giggle like little kids.

“Hey.“ Poison greeted quietly, their face still buried in his hair once they stopped spining.

“Hi.“ Ghoul pulls back with a smile and gives them a quick kiss on the lips before hopping down from their arms, “Let’s go.“ he adds, taking their hand in his, a warm tingling sensation traveling up his arm and throughout his body. Destroya, he was so in pastel with them it wasn’t even funny.

The teens’ ride back to the Lobby was spent cuddling quietly in the uncomfortable train seat and yearning for a life far out of BL/i’s reach, beyond the city walls, their heads lulling from side to side as their tired eyes closed in drawn-out blinks. It was two in the morning by the time they’d made it past the Old Metropolis City Line and followed the marks to the Tunnel- though the name itself was a rather misleading title for a hole that’s been blown in the City wall with the help of some explosives and a few well-timed distractions.

A chilly breeze blew from the other side and into the perfectly controled weather of Battery City, sending a shiver down Ghoul’s spine both because of the cold and his anticipation, shaking his head out of its sleep daze. Poison’s grip on his hand tightened as they passed through and he gently rubbed the back of their hand with his thumb as to offer some sort of silent reassurance. The two ended up in a fairly shallow ditch just outside of the city walls, desert stretching seemingly endless on either side and dotted by distand shiluettes as it reached out for the horizon. The sky was still pitch black and even though they were barely outside Battery City, Ghoul could swear the sky was splattered with more tiny droplets of light than he’d ever seen from inside the walls.

With a gentle tug on his hand, Poison brough Ghoul out of his thoughts, nodding in the direction they were heading in and leaving the other comply distracted as he wondered at the vastness of the new world unraveling before him. They made their way quickly at first, hurrying to get away from the City that they both made a quiet promise to never return to, but as it got reduced to nothing more but a distant dot, they slowed down to a steady pace. At that point the novelty of the night sky had worn off, leaving Ghoul to slowly return back to Earth, as his gaze settled on Poison’s frowning expression.

“Hey,” he said softly, trying to catch their attention, “You’re okay?“

They only nodded distracted and sighed with a smile that didn’t quite reach their eyes when Ghoul huddled closer into their side part because he wanted them to tell him what’s wrong and part because he was fucking cold.

“I’m fine.“ Poison finally mumbles, letting go of his hand to wrap their arm around his shoulders and pull him closer, “Just forgot something important back at home.“

“We can stop by and get it.“ the younger supplied, even though he wasn’t entirely certain of what he was saying, either. He just hated seeing them upset- he always would- and at the time that was all that came out.

“Yeah...yeah, I guess we can.“ they agreed, their smile a little more genuine that time, but with an emotion Ghoul couldn’t quite make out behind it.

Silence fell over the pair again as they trudged through the wasteland of Zone One, tiny clouds of dust getting kicked out from under the soles of their shoes. Despite the biting cold of the desert night, Ghoul could feel himself leaning onto Poison more and more as his brain waged war against his eyelids to stay closed. It’s funny how time passes when you’re tired- one moment he was in the desert and then the next there was concrete under his feet once again, short buildings of one or two stories like he’d seen in faded pre-war pictures were lined on either side of him.

They stopped in the yard of an one story house, sneaking around the side of it until they reached the last window that had seemingly been left open over night. Poison carefully sat Ghoul down in the short grass and instructed him to do something along the lines of staying there, before they climbed inside through the window. Now, Ghoul had never been someone who listened to what he was told to do and that is exactly how he found himself peering over the windowsill and into the house.

Poison stood with their back to him and across from them there was a teen about Ghoul’s age that he could only assume was their sibling by their matching dirty blonde hair and piercing glares. The two greeted each other by names Ghoul had long made a point to forget along with his own, when the youngest glanced past their sibling right at him, making him freeze in place.

“Who’s that?“ they nodded to him with a frown and the older sibling turned around, their eyes landing on the short raven juvee who gave them a small awkward wave.

He expected them to be mad, expected them to yell at him for not listening to them, for fucking it all up- but they didn’t. Instead, they just looked at him with a soft expression and quiely motioned him over. Ghoul complied this time, scurrying by their side and snaking his hand in theirs, interlocking their fingers again.

With a small deep breath, Poison spoke up again, “This is my partner.”

That simple sentence made the other teen’s heart skip a beat as a small smile crept onto his face before promptly dropping off when his eyes accidentally met the younger sibling’s pensive gaze. He swallowed dryly and looked down to his and Poison’s hands as he softly swung them back and forward, trying to distract his mind from the anxious thoughts floating through his head.

“Well, then I guess I should thank them for making my dumbass sibling remember they have a brother.“ the younger finally scoffed before adding, “Don’t give me that look- I know you.“ when the older sibling let out an offended noise.

“So, uhh...you don’t hate me?“ Ghoul mumbled awkwardly.

The other paused, looking like he was considering what the former said, “Nah.” he decided, “Anyone who makes them smile that much like a dork is fine in my book.”

True to his words, Poison was looking down at him with fond smile on their face, grinning wide enough to show teeth when Ghoul looked up at them before adverting their eyes to the carpeted floor with a light pink blush. He’d never get tired of that smile.

“I’m Fun Ghoul, by the way. He/they pronouns.“ he belatedly introduced himself with a yawn, but the other didn’t seem to mind it.

“Kobra Kid. Just he/him.“ Kobra said as he kneeled next to one of the beds and started rummaging under it for something.

“You chose a name without telling me?“ Poison let out a strangled noise, sounding genuinely upset, like the thought had just occured to them.

“Well, you didn’t tell me yours either, so we’re even.“ Kobra shrugged, coming out with a backpack in his left hand.

“It’s Party Poison.“ the older grumbled, making the latter snicker, “What?“

“That’s so edgy.“ the boy smiled, trying to hold back his laughter.

“Oh, you’re one to talk, Kobra.“ his sibling scoffed, feigning offence.

“Ladies, ladies. Let us not fight- not everyone can have an amazing name like I do.“ Ghoul chimed in jokingly and the three burst into almost drunken giggles, the sound leaving a warm sleepy feeling in his chest.

The atmosphere soon sobered up as a knock echoed through the empty halls, freezing the blood running through the teenager’s veins as they exchanged terrified looks. The siblings threw eachother pointed glances like they were having some silent conversation that the raven’s half-awake mind couldn’t make sense of. At some point his legs had started moving, but it didn’t quite register until he nearly ran into the wall and out the open window.

The three snuck around the side of the house, peeking at the front door from behind the brick wall in a fashion that reminded the juvee of an old pre-war illustration he once saw. Standing on the doorstep werre two figures dressed in white suits who seemed to be talking to who ever was stading in the doorway and letting the lights from inside cast an off-colored yellow rectangle on the concrete step.

“You don’t think those are...“ Kobra whispered and Poison shook their head, leaving Ghoul uncertain of what to understand from it as their grip on his hand tightened.

“The car.“ they finally said, nodding to the white vehicle parked across the street and then added, “Go!“ when all the younger two did was stare at them like they had just spoken in some foregin language.

Once the Suits were inside and the door closed with a soft noise, the teens bolted across the street, throwing the doors open and hurriedly jumping inside the car. In the front seats, Poison and Kobra were frantically looking for something as Ghoul anxiously watched the siblings’ front porch from the backseat biting on his fingernails.

“Shit.“ the oldest hissed, hitting the steering wheel annoyed and making the black haired teen flinch out of his thoughts, “They keys aren’t here.“

“I can probably start it up.“ he offered, getting a set of odd looks from the two teens sitting in the front.

“I like him.“ Kobra said to no one in particular and the black haired juvee grinned at the compliment.

Abandoning his bag into the backseat, Ghoul crawled over the console and somehow managed to end up half way into Poison’s lap and halfway into the footwell as he struggled to remember how the hell did you jumpstart a car again? After a little more looking around and a buttload of even more confusion, the car engine came to life with a roar nearly starteling the short teen into the footwell entirely. Withe help of his partner he got out fairly easily, sneaking a quick peck on their cheek before their brother shooed him back into his seat grumbling about keeping their PDA away from him.

Poison floored it almost the instant Ghoul returned in his previous sitting spot and he didn’t quite understand why until a white beam of light flashed past his wondow and hit one of the rearview mirrors, making it wave limply from where it had been attached. Well, that wasn’t good...

One hot white beam of electricity turned into a dozen and the two vaguely human-shaped blobs firing them turned in to three cars much like the on they were driving in. Their luck only seemed to look up as the car started swerving out of control and ramming its side into a tree, leaving the doors on the side Kobra was on unable to open. Before he could really process anything that had just happened, the blonde threw a white puritan blaster in his lap and nodded him to get out as he quickly followed his sibling out the driver side’s door.

The air must’ve had dropped a few degrees from last time because Ghoul was shaking in his shitty worn-out sneakers as he gripped the gun tighter- its weight unfamiliar in his hands. There weren’t anymore shots being fired and the teen couldn’t neccessarily tell if that was a good thing, the cars that were following them stopping not even six feet away.

A fight soon broke out and that helped with the teen’s jitters, as he foused on shooting the quickly approaching draculoids. It wasn’t until almost halfway through the fight that he remembered the switchblade carefully tucked away in his back pocket and hastily took it out before calling on Kobra who turned to him almost confused.

“Catch!“ is all he told the young boy and threw him the knife, which he thankfully caught, flipping it open and stabbing it into the side of a drac that was trying to sneak up on him.

The fight went on for what felt like ages until the three ended up back to back, fending off the dracs circling them. It was a futile effort- for every draculoid they shot down there was another to take its place- but they had already gotten so far they would’ve rather died than given in, which seemed a very possible, if not certain, outcome in that moment.

Some deity must’ve been in their favour that night, though, because with the thundering noise of a diesel engine coming from over a hill came a rebel mounted on a motorclycle who started shooting down dracs as soon they were within range. It was clear that the stranger had more experience with a blaster than all of them combined and together, the four of them made work of the latex-masked feinds. With the adrenaline starting to wear off, Ghoul clung tired onto Poison’s arm as them and Kobra stared down the desert rebel who had pulled off not far away from them and started walking towards the teens.

“I’m gonna assume that party was for you.“ was the first thing they said- it wasn’t a question, rather a general statement.

The siblings exchanged a look before the older nodded in confirmation and waited for them to continue.

“Jet Star. He/him.“ Jet introduced himself, subconciously making a flippant gesture with his hands as he mentioned his pronouns.

“Party Poison. They/them.“ Poison replied and then nodded to Kobra and Ghoul respectively as they introduced them, “Kobra Kid, he/him, and Fun Ghoul-“

“He/they“ the raven teen finished their sentence and yawned.

Jet nodded, “If you need somewhere to sleep, Dr. D’s station is a few miles ahead- I’m sure he’ll let you crash there ‘til tomorrow.“

“How do we know we can trust you?“ Kobra eyed him skeptically and the other shrugged.

“You don’t, but if I meant you harm I would’ve let those dracs finish their job, wouldn’t I?“ the rebel argued and turned back to his bike as the other three clambered into one of the now abandoned draculoid cars and followed him to this ‘Dr. D’ person’s staition.

It was a long night.

#woot woot this finally done (at 4 am again ofc). that kiss scene was the bane of my existence- how do u romance??#attraction? sounds fake but okay ~ your local aro-spec ace writer #boo's writing #killjoys #the true lives of the fabulous killjoys #the fab four #the fabulous four #the fabulous killjoys #jet star #kobra kid #fun ghoul #party poison #fun poison #fanfiction #fanfic #ttlotfk #long post #one shot

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dukedrakes · 4 years

Text

Finally

Pairing: Ethan Ramsey x MC (Lily)

Rating: PG-13 (some cursing)

Words: 2.3K

Summary: Lily and Ethan finally talk about ‘us’.

This was requested by a beautiful anon who wanted to see my take on what happens when Ethan and MC finally decide to screw ethics and let themselves be together – I’m so sorry it’s taken so long; life hasn’t been kind. Thank you so much for the request and please send me any prompts if you like!

P.S I really miss Ethan.

Don’t forget to tell me what you think, Reblog and Like! Enjoy!

Find my other work here.

Taglist: @emceesynonymroll @butindeed @saivilo @ibldw-main@drakeswalkers @maxwellshippo @i-bloody-love-drake-walker @drakewalkerwhipped @cora-nova @kayden-vescovi @katedrakeohd @ladyangel70 @drakesensworld @ccolz88-blog @i-miss-trr @lady-kato @nazario-sayeed @perriewinklenerdie @furiouscloddonutpeanut @choicesyouplayandmore @drakewalker04 @innerpostmentality @carreraleigh

(I curated the tag list by adding people who wanted to be tagged + people who interacted with any of my posts of or about my fics and/or are mutuals/friends, so if you’d like to be added or removed, let me know!)

Lily sat in the locker room bench; legs crossed with a medical textbook in front of her. She had an apple in her hand which she ate she scanned through the passages filled with medical jargon that might help her with treating one her patients. It was unusually quiet in the locker room, no doors slammed or chatter from the other residents. But Lily welcomed the serenity, it gave her the opportunity to focus and concentrate on the words in front of her.

However, she couldn’t. For a certain fellow member of the Diagnostics Team was consuming her thoughts instead.

It had been exactly 4 months and 17 days since she’d been offered the position that everyone had been vying over. And it had also been exactly 4 months and 17 days since whatever was between herself and Dr. Ethan Ramsey had ended. In truth, she wasn’t expecting it to hurt as much as it did. Even though she’d known that night before was going to be their last now that Ethan had been reinstated. She thought she had prepared enough emotionally. That their night together would’ve satisfied her enough to let him go. But she was wrong. Incredibly wrong.

She hadn’t expected to be offered the position on the Diagnostics Team, she was grateful to be even given a second chance at Edenbrook. She definitely hadn’t anticipated being promoted. And certainly not to the very team where the man running it was one she’d slept with twice and had an undeniable connection with.

She knew ending whatever it was between them was the right thing to do. She knew that. But it was still hard. Especially when she saw Ethan every day, had to work with him on patients, confer with him on treatment plans – all the while pretending that everything was fine when in reality, she wanted nothing more than to take his hand in hers and just touch him.

That was the thing that got her the most. Not being able to just touch him. Hold his hand. Trace her fingers up his arm. Or run her fingers across the stubble on her jaw – her favourite thing to do. She could handle not kissing him – she wanted to do that too – but to be starved of his touch was the hardest. There were times where Ethan’s hand would graze hers as he pointed to something on a chart, or his arm would brush against hers as he passed her, and the energy of that contact travelled through her entire being, giving her goosebumps and making her stomach flip. It was kind of like that feeling you get when you accidentally touch the person you’ve been crushing on, but it was all backwards because Lily had already been with Ethan.

Lily sighed and closed her textbook and tossed her apple core in the bin. She put her head in her hands. She didn’t know what to do. She’d been pretending and walking on eggshells around Ethan for months now. She was tired. And she didn’t know how long she could keep this up. It was even more of a stab in the heart when she saw Ethan being so irrevocably and completely normal around her. Like nothing had changed. Like nothing had even happened between them. It was like Lily had imagined the whole thing and was holding onto nothing but a fantasy.

She stood up and put the textbook in her locker. With her break over and no progress on a plan for her patient, she straightened her classic white doctor jacket in the mirror, before leaving the locker room. She walked down the hallways, making her way to Ethan’s office, her feet knowing the familiar route without even thinking about it. She needed advice on her patient, and she was clearly getting nowhere by herself. She had no choice but to talk to Ethan. No matter how much she didn’t want to. It was much easier to pretend when she wasn’t near him.

It wasn’t long before she was in front of his office door. The dark blue nameplate that read “Dr. Ethan Ramsey” a contrast to the light wood of the door. He might not even be in his office. She hoped he wouldn’t be. But there was also a part of her that wanted to see him. Because this was all she got now. She had to take what she could get. Until she eventually got over him. If she ever did.

Lily took a deep breath and raised her slightly trembling hand to the wood of the door. She stood there for a few seconds that felt more like hours, contemplating whether to even bother Ethan with this, he’s no doubt busy and she was more than capable of figuring this out herself once she forced herself to concentrate. She didn’t want to rely on Ethan. She didn’t want to be that girl.

With a clenched hand and her fingernails digging into her palm, she mumbled. “Just knock, you dumbass.”

“Lily?”

Lily whipped her head to the side and saw him. Ethan. He was standing there with a clipboard in hand, looking as handsome as ever in his classic blue shirt and tie under his Edenbrook coat. Lily took in breath both from the sight of him and the realisation that he’d seen her in front of his door, just standing there with her hand poised to knock.

“Ethan. I mean. Dr. Ramsey. Hi.” Lily stuttered as she jumped back and quickly retracted her and held it behind her back.

Ethan cleared his throat. “Dr. Murphy.”

There was a beat of silence between them where both weren’t sure what to say to each other. This interaction felt different somehow. Every time they’d spoken there was this level of distance and professionalism that they maintain to ensure that neither of them got too close – that there was a boundary between them. But this time Ethan had caught Lily in this private moment with herself, it almost felt like an intrusion.

Lily took a breath. “Um, how long have you been standing there?”

Ethan shook his head. “Not long.”

He was lying. Lily could always tell.

“I need to talk to you about a patient.” She asked tentatively.

Ethan nodded and strode to his door to unlock it, he opened it and stood to the side to let Lily in first. Lily mumbled a ‘thanks’ as she walked into the office. Ethan followed as he went behind the desk, put his clipboard down and began to file the papers in the meticulously organised filing cabinet.

Lily stood at the edge of the scene in front of her. She watched him move effortlessly, the awkwardness in the air around them.

“Well? What is it?” Ethan asked. “I’ve got a meeting with Banerji in 10 minutes.”

Lily blinked at his bristled tone. “I need some help with figuring out the best course of action with a patient who’s got some contradicting issues.”

“Can’t you do that yourself? You’re more than capable, Li— Dr. Murphy.” Ethan huffed.

Lily frowned. “Excuse me for disturbing you. I just wanted to treat the patient correctly.”

Ethan sighed. “That’s not what I meant.”

“So, what did you mean?” Lily crossed her arms.

“I meant, you’re a good doctor, Lily.” Ethan replied.

“That doesn’t mean I don’t need help every now and then.” Lily retorted.

Ethan ran his hand through his tousled hair. “I haven’t got time for this right now.”

“Then make time!” Lily exclaimed with a spark of anger.

Lily and Ethan looked at each other, both surprised by her outburst. Ethan was often hard to read, but this time, his eyes betrayed him completely. “Why do you keep pushing me away?” Lily whispered.

Ethan closed his eyes and hung his head. “Don’t do this, Lily.”

“Just answer the question, Ethan.” Lily said sternly.

“You know exactly why.” Ethan replied sharply.

“No, I don’t think I do. Maybe you can explain it to me in a way that I understand.” Lily patronised.

“Stop acting like a child, we’re adults, Lily.” Ethan rolled his eyes.

“Says the man who can’t deal with and express his emotions.” Lily knew the words were harsh and unfair, but she was angry. Months of frustration and hurt that have been bottled up were finally coming out. “You’ve barely looked at me properly in months. It’s like everything that happened didn’t even matter to you.”

“You know damn well that’s not true.” Ethan flared.

“Do I?” Lily challenged. “So, answer my question, Ethan.”

“You think it’s just so easy, don’t you?” Ethan replied, acid on his tongue with every word as he stepped towards her. “Have you even considered the ethnical and workplace consequences of us? There are patients to consider, the team, HR, we can’t just say ‘fuck it’ and do what we want, Lily. There are bigger issues here than me and you.”

“I’m not some petulant child that doesn’t understand consequences, Ethan. But I know when to take a risk for something that’s important to me.” Lily replied.

They were almost chest to chest now, and Lily has to crane her neck to look at Ethan.

“I’m not a risk-taker. You know that.”

“So, I guess that translates into; ‘You’re not worth the risk.’ Got it.” Lily smiled with contempt. “Guess I have my answer.”

Lily stepped back and began to turn away from Ethan, but he reached for her arm and pulled her back. “That’s not what I’m saying.”

Lily raised her voice, exasperated and said; “Then what are you saying, Ethan!? Stop speaking in riddles and just fucking tell me! I’m so fucking tired of tiptoeing around you and us. I know you saw me standing outside your door for longer than you said, I can’t even talk to you anymore without getting this awful dread in the pit of my stomach that I hate because I shouldn’t feel like that around the person that I—”

“I’m scared, okay?!” Ethan exclaimed. Silence enveloped them, the only sound was Lily and Ethan’s breaths, heavy from the argument. Ethan cupped Lily’s cheeks as he said; “I want you more than anything, Lily. But I’m scared of what could happen if we…” He shook his head.

Lily blinked at him. Before she let out a breath of disbelief mixed with relief and dare-she-say, love? And put her hands over his, rubbing her thumbs over the back of his hand. Finally. “If we what, Ethan?”

Ethan took in a breath. “If we pursue this, what would happen when everyone finds out? I don’t want them thinking negative things, especially about you.”

Lily shook her head. “I don’t care about anyone else. And you shouldn’t either. You’re Ethan fucking Ramsey for god’s cake.” Lily smiled. “I care about you. Anyone that knows me knows the truth.”

“And what if…if this doesn’t work?” Ethan asked. “What would we do then? How would it affect our work?”

“But what if it does work?” Lily whispered.

Ethan shook his head, pulling away from Lily and turning his back, running a hand through his hair again. “I don’t know, Lily. I don’t know I can do this.”

Ethan stood with his hands on his hips and his head to the ceiling, his eyes closed. Lily walked behind him and wrapped her arms around his waist, her forehead resting on his back. She couldn’t deny that she felt him relax under her touch. And Ethan couldn’t either.

Lily moved to hold his right arm with both hands, before moving one to hold his hand. His fingers instinctively interlaced with hers. “What if we…what if we come up with a plan?” Lily looked up at him.

“What kind of plan?” Ethan asked, looking down at her by his side.

“A plan to try this. Try us. See where it goes. But we’ll keep it a secret, so, we can see if we like us. Then we’ll talk to Banerji about this if we really do. He’ll understand. You’re like a son to him. And then if it’s okay, we’ll tell some people – my friends, but still keep it quiet so it doesn’t impact the workplace.” Lily suggested, her thumb rubbing his hand again like it was the most natural thing in the world.

“And if it’s not okay? What if Banerji says no?” Ethan asked.

“Then we figure something out. I move from Edenbrook, maybe.” Lily replied with a small shrug.

“I can’t make you do that.” Ethan shook his head in disapproval.

Lily leaned her head on his arm. “But I would, for you. For us.”

“Us...” Ethan whispered.

“What do you think?” Lily asked with a small voice. “Can we do that? Do you want to?”

“It’s going to be hard.” Ethan said.

“I know.”

“But I want to. God knows I want to more than anything.” Ethan sighed like a weight was lifted off his shoulders and turned so he could take both of Lily’s hands. “I can’t bear another day without you.”

Lily didn’t know who moved in first. But their lips finally connected, and both of them collapsed into the kiss. Lily wrapped her arms around his neck as Ethan’s arms went around her middle, holding her there before lifting her to his height. Lily wrapped her legs around him and smiled into the kiss, her fingers playing with the hair at the nape of his neck. The world stopped around them. They both starved for this kiss and it was finally happening, and it was as if all the pieces of the world’s hardest puzzle fell into place.

When they finally broke away, they rested their foreheads together. Smiling and looking into each other’s eyes. Ethan was still holding her effortlessly as Lily hugged him tightly, burying her head into the crook of his neck as his stubble tickled her skin. Ethan held her just as tightly as he did the same, his eyes shutting as he breathed in the smell of her skin and the familiar smell of her cocoa butter shampoo.

Lily pressed a light kiss to Ethan’s neck. “I missed you.”

Ethan smiled into her skin. “I missed you more.”

I hope you all enjoyed it! Let me know what you thought!

If you have any requests, please send them in! It might take me some time to get to (I have a list of fics I want to write) but I would love to see them!

Remember to Reblog and Like!

#playchoices #ethan ramsey x mc #ethan ramsey fic #open heart #larissa's fics #larissa's drabbles #finally #playchoices fic #choices fic #playchoices one shot #choices one shot #pixelberry #choices #choices: stories you play #open heart fic

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krsnlove · 5 years

Text

Swimming Lessons

A/N: @alj4890 gave me this gif like millions of years ago to make a fic out of and here it is. For you BFF who has too much patience for me 😂have fun on your you know what this week! 💗

P.S. Not canon. We get to see Liam as a teenager though 🤷🏾‍♀️...everyone is just friends at this point.

Tagging: @alj4890 @cora-nova @vickypoochoices

“No!”

Liam’s desperate plea does little to affect Amanda. Ignoring his voice, the young Duchess of St. Orella promptly searches for the nearest exit and made her way out of the ballroom.

“Lady Amanda!,” a different voice cried out.

She can hear the whispers follow her but she paid no attention, solely focused on making her escape.

The commotion inside the palace did little to disturb the courtyard garden, which she was grateful for. Amanda let out a breath of relief into the cool of the night and with it inhaled a much needed dose of fresh air. She allowed herself a small but very brief smile at the change of scenery.

Strings of lights adorned the garden causing a soft glow beneath the moonlight. It was the perfect setting for the annual Prince’s Ball. It was harmless fun for the two young Princes of Cordonia and the rest of the children of the royal court.

“Stay here Cauldwell,” Liam tells Amanda’s date, pulling him back from leaving the room. He knew if anyone had to talk some sense into her, it would need to be him.

Well, really Maxwell if he was being honest.

Since Maxwell and Amanda have a special bond from childhood that carried into their teen years, it automatically placed Liam second. All the lessons in the world on the art of compromise never could prepare him for Amanda though.

Which is why Drake was always a last resort when it came to this sort of thing.

Liam found her pacing aimlessly in the middle of the courtyard gardens. The sound of the water fountain nearby made it difficult to hear what she was saying but he knew her words were shooting out at a rapid pace. One could always count on receiving an earful after Amanda was through with one of her rants.

With his head down, he found himself dragging his feet to meet her. Anyone would have to be a fool to approach her in this state he thought quietly.

“You!,” Liam looked up to see Amanda charging directly towards him.

“What?!,” he couldn’t help himself as he took a few steps back.

“You know what!,” she took the paper fan in her hand and poked it at his chest, “Don’t you ever set me up with someone like that!” She angrily pointed the fan towards the ballroom.

Liam rubbed at his chest. The same spot where Amanda’s fan had poked him. He was sure there would be a bruise in the morning.

“Cauldwell is—,” he tried to defend the visiting son of a noble.

“An. Imbecile,” she answered, pronouncing each word with restraint.

“What happened?!,” Liam felt the uneasiness building inside him. He was the one who set Amanda up with Cauldwell after all.

“He’s a pig!,” Amanda said, ignoring Liam’s question.

“I should’ve known! But did I listen to my gut? No. Just went along with things like I always do..”, she continued to ramble.

“....Amanda…,” Liam tried to get her attention.

“...what stops me from being so proper? Because I’m a Duchess?! I’ll show you, you sniveling little weasel...”

Liam tried to hide the amusement in his voice at her scathing remarks of an absent Cauldwell. He cleared his throat louder than usual in another attempt to grab her attention.

“...Amanda…,” he tried again.

“...he thinks he can talk to me like that!? I should’ve punched him. Right in the face.”

Liam’s smile is quickly replaced with a sense of alarm at hearing Amanda’s threat.

“AMANDA!,” he couldn’t help the outburst fearful of the visiting nobleman’s son acting inappropriately with one of his closest friends. She finally paid attention to him and stopped mid-sentence, looking at him expectantly.

“Did he hurt you?!,” Liam carefully grabbed her arm and pulled her close, studying her features to look for any bruising or sign of distress.

But she pulled her arm out of Liam’s grip.

“Only my pride Liam,” she said while slipping the white, elbow-long satin gloves off. “Not for long though,” her eyes went to the same exit Liam had come through moments earlier.

“What are you--,” Liam’s words are cut short as he hears Caudwell’s hearty laugh nearby. The sound is closely followed by the young man himself with Olivia on his arm, walking towards the water fountain.

“You can’t be serious,” Liam whispered to Amanda who was sporting a ridiculously mischievous smirk. “Don’t do it!,” he said while pulling her down into a crouching position, attempting to hide from the couple.

“I didn’t think you cared for me Lady Olivia,” Caudwell’s voice echoes several feet away as he continues a conversation with the red-headed Duchess.

“It’s just water Liam,” Amanda whispered back. “You owe me!”

“I hardly think this is something that can be owed!”

“In my defense you weren’t supposed to follow me out here,” Amanda told him as she eyed the couple who was now only a few feet away.

“This ends tonight. You and Olivia can’t keep doing this to unsuspecting sons of noblemen you know.”

Liam pulled her up from their crouched position, wanting to make a clean break from the fountain before Cauldwell noticed either of them.

But Amanda’s feet stood in place.

“I beg your pardon!,” she pushes him away in an attempt to loosen his grip. But she put just enough force behind it for Liam to lose his balance towards the fountain.

“Liam!,” Amanda’s voice is no longer a whisper as she notices his hands flailing in the air and seeing the look of utter surprise on his face.

She desperately reaches out to grab a hold of him in an attempt to catch his footing but she was no match for Liam’s strength as they both fall into the water fountain.

“Amanda!,” she wasn’t sure if it was Liam, Olivia or Cauldwell calling her name with the water in her ears but she shrugged off the strong hands that tried to pull her out of the fountain before standing up in the ankle deep water.

“Are you okay?,” Liam’s annoyingly muffled voice fills her head as shakes her head, trying her hardest to rid the water in her ears.

“Just peachy Prince Liam,” Amanda replied.

“Don’t be like that. You pushed me!,” Liam reasoned with her while attempting to lend a helping hand out of the water fountain.

She slapped his hand away before climbing out of the fountain without his help while a laughing Olivia and stunned Cauldwell stood by.

“Shove it ‘Liv,” Amanda told her closest friend causing Olivia to double over in laughter.

“Would you like an escort Lady Amanda?,” a concerned Cauldwell asked.

A confused Liam looked between the visitor and his friend, unsure of Amanda’s anger towards what seemed to be a perfect gentleman.

“...After all you might need help getting out of those wet clothes you know,” Cauldwell finished with a look Liam can only describe as disturbing.

“What did you say?,” Liam asked as he approached Cauldwell. It all made sense now, he realized. Amanda’s rant a couple minutes ago about him wasn’t for nothing. Liam could feel the anger building in the pit of his stomach.

With fists clenched at his side and drops of water dripping from the tip of his nose, the youngest Prince of the Cordonian royal family is inches away from the visiting nobleman’s son, their faces only inches apart.

“I said--,” Cauldwell started to say but stopped when Liam suddenly lunged forward, his fingers closing around his throat for a brief moment before Amanda pushed Cauldwell away causing him to fall flat on his bottom.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?!,” the visitor yelled in rage as Amanda situated herself between him and Liam.

“The King will hear about this!,” Cauldwell stood from the ground, dusting off the dirt from his pants as Amanda tried to hold Liam back from approaching their visitor once again.

Liam slipped around Amanda’s defense for a brief moment before she pulled his arm back as Cauldwell moves a few steps back, cowering behind Olivia.

“Olivia get him out of here,” Amanda warned the red-headed Duchess.

“Why would I do that?,” she asked, looking back at Cauldwell still hiding behind her.

“‘Liv!?,” Amanda yelled back.

“You’re no fun. At least let Liam get one hit in,” she encouraged. “Look at him!”

Amanda looked back at Liam who has yet to break eye contact with Cauldwell.

“If I hear you speak like that to Amanda, or any other young lady, I’ll rip your tongue out so no woman is subjected to the foul things that come from your mouth ever again,” Liam told him in a calm voice.

“Get out of here Cauldwell. It is only the concern for Lady Amanda’s well-being that is keeping me from you right now.”

“Well I never--,” Cauldwell began to say but he is met with Olivia’s elbow to his jaw, knocking him out instantly as he falls to the ground.

“‘Liv!,” Amanda exclaimed.

“Oops,” the red-headed Duchess said. “He was right though. I didn’t care for him.”

#the royal romance #liam #liam rhys #amanda oc #fanfiction #choices trr #trr #olivia nevrakis

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floralseokjin · 5 years

Text

crystallised feedback 🥺

marinanoona replied to your post “” crystallised 04 (m)”

I just read it again. I just love it, it’s amazing. The way you write really touches my heart, I feel all the emotions. I’m so happy, thank you so much for writing, you are so talented. We are all so thankful for your work ��

thank you so much!! from the bottom of my heart! glad you enjoyed this chapter and i’m glad the wait was worth it 🤧

ashugamon replied to your post “” crystallised 04 (m)”

Finally!!! They're realized how they feel! I'm so happy for them, please don't break them apart for the next chapter hehe.. Also you are amazing as always Jordan ��

heheh you know me.... no but really i can confirm the next chapter will be very cute and wholesome!! thank you so much for reading/the support! 💖

releasingthesoul replied to your post “” crystallised 04 (m)”

I love them so much!!! This chapter was so smooth and serene and beautiful!!! I loved how their relationship as friends to friends with feelings for each other developed in a very natural way �� it was so soft, I’m always blown away by your writing and I’m never disappointed!! ��

thank you, that really means a lot! i tried my hardest to make the chapter run as smoothly and natural as possible! glad i managed to pul it off phew 😅

@kpopfanfictrash reblogged your post “” crystallised 04 (m)”

Jordan, how DARE YOU DO THIS TO ME?!?! I’M SO HURT RIGHT NOW, EVERYTHING HURTS AND IN THE BEST WAY! I am too excited to give a proper review but maybe that’s the most applicable kind for this series. I love Seokjin so, so much and have ever since the MOAM drabbles. ANYWAYS. THIS WHOLE THING READ LIKE A DREAM. @floralseokjin = truly the queen of relationships and tugging at heartstrings. All the little details in here just… TVD! ILY 3000! The gym part! I am so excited for more and this part was honestly just…. UGH.

SHANNA I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU READ MY 24K MONSTER CHAPTER AND DRAGON DICK SEOKJIN ALL IN ONE NIGHT! u are crazy and i love you for it 💗💗thank you so so much for being an avid moam jin lover, it means the world and i’m really happy you enjoyed this chapter!!! mwah !!!!!!

@underthejoon reblogged your post “” crystallised 04 (m)”

i am screaming. screaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaming !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 i just. this was so. wonderful. magnificent, i am all caps yelling at you, jordan cause this was the best. my heart feels like it’s gonna explode. the tension was so asdhfbsdfjh. i really was like damn this could go either way idk what to do with myself, somethings gonna happen. and then something did happen and ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! im trying to not spoil a bunch but as you already know, i am moam seokjin’s #1 fan. i love this. i love you. this was a+++++++

p.s. i love the co–star app and that part was so k;gjse;tkghjst;kh.

FAL ily 😘😘i’m glad you felt the tension because i sure did whilst writing lmao! especially the last scene! you are indeed moam seokjin’s biggest fan and he loves you greatly for the support and belief in him!!! thank you 🥺🥺

p.s. the co–star is literally the best thing (albeit evil) but writing that scene where jin got all offended was my FAVOURITE ahhhhhhhh and then well he had to amp his game up in the end 😬bless that adorable idiot!!

Also thank you for all the love with replies and reblogs and tags for this chapter! i would reply to everyone but there’s a fear i would get boring and repetitive :( just know i’ve read them all and i’m so so grateful and happy that you guys enjoyed 🤧love you, you’re all the best and i hope i can get chapter 5 out a lot faster this time around (let’s cross our fingers!!!)

#fic:crystallised #replies

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bardovelho · 5 years

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3rd Habitversary in 2019

Today , April 14th, I celebrate my 3rd year Habitversary. The second one was skipped, forgotten along with all my tasks and Habitica itself, by the time I was experiencing my longest, hardest, and most teaching burnout of my Habitican life!

I learned that burnouts happen to me when I take too much pressure on myself and have too many difficult Dailies that I can't face. So, I faced not a single one instead of trying to do the best that I can, by avoiding Habitica almost completely. The magical key to break this bad vicious cycle is to Rest in the Inn WHILE doing the Dailies that I feel like doing, with no pressure. Then, I will only leave the Inn when I'm able to reach one Perfect Day, maybe 3 to make sure. This way, I'll still be leveling up, building motivation, but with no stress. Because Habitica is not about adding all the tasks that I can remember and doing as much as (im)possible; it's a tool to build motivation, which will generate progressive productivity. It can be like a muscle\battery of will power (as I read in The Power Of Habit), if well designed and oiled.

The (other) problem is that I'm now noticing that each task is unique, and it only stays without change when I don't evolve in it. So, it's a good thing to constantly adapt (at least, the most important) tasks title and description accordingly to my evolutions and consequent adaptation of new techniques that I'm building. This means that I need, with great awareness, to periodically check if each task is working as it should, and edit it accordingly to how it should be right now, specially Dailies and Habits. I'm thinking about adding a monthly revision about this. Adding monthly summaries instead of only the weekly ones helps a lot, too.

I'm now facing 20 dailies and more, the double of what I could do in the past, and challenging my comfort zone every day, without breaking the Perfect Day streak (I'm amazed with myself every day!). The Big Mountain of ToDo's is still to be conquered, but I'm managing it slowly: I'm using a dedicated Trello board to manage this, but it needs a serious update.

Priority monsters of the past (that is, during 1st Habitversary): I'm getting much better with my passive-aggressive behavior (thanks to a dedicated Habit), and avoiding conflict like a stealth ninja. But the world is a mess, so I'll still find opportunities for better training. I'm also understanding others better, but there will be always room for improvement on this topic. Plus, I'm building positivity and optimism behavior. These all might look like simpler things nowadays, but after reading my 1st Habitversary, I noticed how I was really struggling with these. Evolving on these issues made my life significantly better.

Tools: Forest has become a game changer for my Pomodoro Technique: I now have a tree code: Starry Tree and Rainbow Flower - Frogodoro (priorities) Moon Tree and Ghost Mushroom - Work after midnight Cactus and Ball Cactus - Avoiding priorities, but working Scarecrow and Pumpkin - Procrastinating Treehouse, Rafflesia - Domestic tasks (previously Habitica Tasks) Nest - Nap Ginkgo and Sunflower- Professional Wisteria - Writing, paperwork Mushroom - Plan Still working on it (specially the tags), but these ones will probably stay. The rooms are specially motivating, since I can invite someone else to work at the same time as me, helping me to share the burden and avoid laziness. I have now a LOT of Forest friends, and I'm very happy that some of those are Habiticans. Some conclusions: The 1st Pomodoro of the day is always the hardest. Frogodori make the day easier and easier. Habitica public challenges improve my Pomodoro dedication.

Duolingo is my go to App to start learning a language, and I'm in a streak with more than 100 consecutive days. Anki is now also used for affirmations: very useful! Trello is used for several projects that involve several tasks, and I find this very organizing, especially when I add specific quality tags to each board. IFTTT adds some cards. RescueTimer is still running on the background, but I haven't checked it for months. OneNote has more detailed notes about how I play Habitica: after this big burnout I struggled a lot to remember what each symbol and task meant, so now I have a dedicated section with everything that I'm doing regarding game mechanics (plus extra notes from specific tasks), because I can't trust my memory every time. Stylish is my permanent eye saver companion when using Habitica site (added some personal styles too), and the Chrome\Firefox extension Dark Mode (#4 (pitch dark)) is very useful, also. WunderList is not perfectly configured and I'm lazy to make it work, but will probably be using it again. Productivity Challenger and Toggl are the only two tools that I stop using since my last celebrated Habitversary.

Future ideas (brainstorming): Hard Mode: Forest in Hard Mode (every second I lose a little bit of focus, a tree dies). Try first: tree dies after 2nd or 3rd distraction. Wardrobe limits: Thinking about paying GP + a negative medium Habit every time I want to change a piece of battle equipment. I'm always using the best equipment for the best Habitica points, and because now I can beat this strategy, it's probably making the game too easier, and less dynamic. Timeclock: if I don't do a Daily by x hour or x hours after waking up, press a specific negative Habit. Offline experiment: Going back to Wunderlist, or use another extension that syncs to Habitica Dailies (shouldn't be Habits because they don't have 21 streaks). Try other extensions to improve game mechanics, automation and time spent on managing Habitica tasks. I need to reduce the time that I spent with habit tracking: although it's giving me great results, it's also probably consuming more energy and time than it should, I suspect.

Other notes: Depression and anxiety still attack from time to time, but now I have tasks and list of routines that I can do to prevent and recover from it faster than ever before, and healthier! Adding the Morning and Go To Bed Ritual is being very difficult, so instead of risking to lose the Perfect Day streak, I prefer to use my second account to get familiar and test this new routine. I inserted a limiting cheat system for Dailies: to skip a Daily, I have to pay 100 GP for each 1000 GP that I own, I can't do this more than 3 times per day, I also have to press 3 negative habits, and a £ marker needs to be added as a checklist item. A Daily cannot have more than 3 £ markers, and every time I want to remove a marker, I have to pay the same penalty as before. This makes me delay the Daily (and pay a penalty) instead of really skipping it, and if a Daily has 3 markets then I know that I really have to spend special focused time on it! I also added a -£ option, for when I do twice as much of that Daily than I should on that day. This helps me to keep doing my daily goals around the time that they need to be done, instead of EXACTLY at the time they need to be done. It brings more flexibility to the daily routines, and helps me to not avoid them, because I delay them instead of skipping them. It also makes me be focused on several Pomodori for a specific task instead of a single one per day.

I'm now (30/04/2019, updating and revising this text) on my 3rd Adventure, at level 103. I'll make a better resume of this 3rd Adventure In the beginning of next month.

P.S.: I just now realized that I haven't published the Report of my second adventure yet! So that's why I was delaying this Habitversary update… Oh well, I have to deal with it next month too. More to come!!

#Habitica #Habitversary #EN

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imagine-loki · 6 years

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Loki and the Witchling

TITLE: Loki and the Witchling

CHAPTER NO./ONE SHOT: 7/?

AUTHOR: nekoamamori

ORIGINAL IMAGINE: Imagine you’re a healer working with the Avengers when Loki comes to join the team

RATING: T (so far)

NOTES/WARNINGS: Also on AO3 click here

It wasn’t hard to find something to wear that night, after you’d washed the smell of smoke and fire off of your skin and our of your hair. How you’d come to smell like smoke you didn’t know, but it was nice to get rid of the acrid scent. Clint’s shirt and your pajama pants had gone straight down the trash chute. They were too scorched to be saved. You were also very much not thinking about how you would now smell like Loki from using his shampoo and soap. He’d given you permission to borrow something of his to wear for the night and you picked a pair of pajama bottoms and a t-shirt from his dresser. They fit well enough, but you had to roll the bottoms of the pants a few times. Loki was quite a bit taller than you.

You cursed when you realized you were going to have to steal clothes from Natasha for tomorrow. She was the hardest to steal from. She guarded her stuff well and would kick your ass if she caught you in her room without permission. That’s why no one had suggested you bunk in her room, even though she was out on some overnight mission for Fury. Unfortunately, she was the only one whose pants would fit you well enough to wear out of the tower.

You threw that thought from your mind for the moment, knowing you needed to get some sleep. It was strange to sleep in a strange bed, but the room was the safest you’d ever been in, and there was something comforting about being surrounded in pillows and blankets that smelled like Loki. But you were obviously not having feelings for him. That would be ridiculous.

You got up early the next morning, intending to see if Natasha had left any clean laundry in the laundry room that you could more easily steal. The second you opened Loki’s door, you found a wrapped box. You picked it up and brought it inside Loki’s room with you, curious as to what it could be, especially since it had your name on the tag. You unwrapped the box, then grabbed one of the many daggers Loki left lying around his room to open the box. You laughed aloud when you saw that inside was an entire outfit, including undergarments and gym shoes, all in your size. As you pulled everything out of the box, wondering who could have possibly sent it to you, a note fluttered out. You grabbed the note and read it over.

Tony said he destroyed all your clothes. I picked these up for you on my way back from my mission last night. Couldn’t have you breaking into my room this morning to steal something of mine while I’m trying to sleep

-Nat

P.S. Your boyfriend should like the shirt

You didn’t question how Natasha knew your sizes for everything. She knew everything about everyone. You pulled the t-shirt from the stack of clothes to look at it properly. It was a green t-shirt. You unfolded it and laughed. In the middle of the front of the shirt was an image of Loki’s helmet. Loki would like the shirt, or at least be amused by it. You got dressed quickly, amazed that not only did everything fit, but it fit better than anything you’d ever owned. Natasha had gotten your actual sizes, and not the baggy handmedown sizes that you usually wore. It actually warmed your heart that she had done so.

Dressed, and with your new phone, you headed down to breakfast. You weren’t surprised at all to see Loki there. He usually was. “Morning Loki,” you greeted him.

“Good morning, witchling,” he replied, pleasantly from his spot at the diningroom table. “Clint left breakfast for you,” he indicated the stack of pancakes that was sitting at your usual place at the table. “He said the team’s list of purchases for Tony is there too. Lady Natasha left this for you,” he added, indicating a backpack that was next to your seat.

“That was nice of everyone,” you commented as you took your place at the table. Loki finally looked at you properly.

“Where did you steal those clothes from?” he asked with a grin.

“I didn’t. Natasha got them for me so I wouldn’t steal her clothes. She said you’d like the shirt,” you grinned back at him. Really she’d said ‘your boyfriend’, but you knew she was teasing you about your friendship with Loki.

“She was correct,” Loki commented. He turned red and looked like he wanted to say more, but didn’t know how, or wasn’t brave enough to. So you turned your attention to your pancakes.

“Did Thor snore too loudly?” you asked, changing the subject for him.

“He snores so loudly,” Loki grumbled. “He’s also a lot bigger now than the last time we’d shared a bed. He hogs the bed and the blankets,” he whined.

“I’m sorry. You can have your bed back tonight. I’ll sleep somewhere else, even if Tony hasn’t fixed my room yet,” you told him, feeling bad that he hadn’t slept because he’d been displaced, because of you.

“Nonsense. If Tony does not finish your room, you will stay in my shielded room,”

“Loki…” you started. He just gave you a look. You sighed. It would be a waste of breath to try to argue with him, so you’d jump off that bridge later and hope that Tony got your room finished before it became an issue.

“Fine,” you grumbled at him, letting him win this round because you knew fighting him would be a waste of breath.

Tony walked into the room while you were finishing your pancakes. “Kid, Happy is going to drive you to school. We’ll pick you up to go shopping afterwards. Clint said he left a list for you?” You grabbed the list from the table and handed it to Tony.

“I don’t need a ride to school,” you told him. He gave you that same stubborn look. Why did they all have that same stubborn look?

“Happy is driving you,” he replied.

“Fine,” you sighed. This wasn’t shaping out to be a good day if all of your teammates were going to tell you what to do all day. It wasn’t your fault that Tony blew up your room

“Why does your shirt have his ugly hat on it?” Tony demanded, gesturing at Loki.

You shrugged in reply, fighting off a grin. “Ask Natasha, she picked it out,” you replied innocently. “Um…Tony…what do I need to do to be considered by the university?” you asked him shyly. You needn’t have been so shy or worried about asking him. His eyes lit up in excitement.

“I’ll make a couple of calls,” he replied.

“Thank you.” It still felt like you were taking a handout, but it was his suggestion, and Loki was right, having options for your future was definitely a good idea. You checked the time on your phone. “I’ve got to get going,” you told them, bouncing up from your seat and taking your plate to the kitchen. You grabbed the backpack Natasha had left for you on your way to the main entrance. “See you guys later!” you called, waving to them both.

Happy drove you silently to school and you spent a long fairly boring day there. Your teachers forgave your lack of homework. Apparently Tony had come through in getting you off the hook for the homework he blew up. All of your teachers gave you full credit for it and thankfully you didn’t have to make up any of the work from being sick yesterday either. That was at least a bright point to your day. The other good things was that it was Friday and you didn’t have to think about school for two whole days.

You weren’t prepared for the whirlwind that was shopping with Tony, Pepper, and Natasha. They all had so much energy, not that you didn’t, but they also had crazy good fashion sense, and insisted that you were getting nice things. All of the stores also recognized all of them, and catered to Tony’s every whim. So you somehow picked out an entire bedroom suite, new carpet, decorations, and paint for the walls, plus an entire wardrobe of clothes, everything from jeans and t-shirts to dresses and ball gowns. You had tried to protest on the dresses and gowns, but were overruled quickly by everyone who insisted you needed nice things too. Jewelry was picked out and you were dragged into the salon to have your hair professionally done for the first time you could ever remember.

Before you left the salon, Nat and Pepper shoved you into the salon’s single person bathroom with one of the dresses they had picked out for you earlier that day. “Guys!” you shouted at them through the bathroom door.

“Trust us!” Nat called through the door.

“Will you tell me what’s going on?” you demanded.

“Maybe after you change,” Pepper replied. You huffed at them, but changed into the dress. They weren’t going to let you out of the bathroom until you had. Why was everyone telling you what to do today?

“I need some shoes!” you called through the door once you had the knee length green dress on. The door cracked open wide enough for a pair of dressy sandals to be handed in to you. You slipped them on, bagged up your comfortable clothes and shoes. You opened the door again once you were dressed. Natasha and Pepper both complimented how you looked and shoved you back in the salon chair and let someone do your makeup. “Seriously, are you two going to tell me what’s going on?” you demanded once that horror was finished.

“Nope!” Natasha replied pleasantly. You glared at her. Pepper laughed and you wondered briefly where Tony had disappeared off to. Happy was nearby, obviously guarding Pepper. She was the CEO of Stark Industries after all, and had no powers of her own, besides the incredible ability to corral Tony.

“You’re staying out of the tower while the sweaty workmen finish your room,” Pepper finally told you as you all left the salon. Natasha was carrying the bag with your comfy clothes in it. A car was pulling up, and parked in one of the spots in front of the salon. “There’s your company for the evening. Right on time. This whole thing was set up by Tony, by the way. Unless it goes well, then we’ll admit that we helped,” she laughed.

You had no idea what she was talking about until Loki stepped out of the driver’s seat of the car that had pulled up wearing a perfectly tailored single breasted all black suit, including black dress shirt, and black tie. You were struck dumb by how handsome he looked.

#Loki #Lover #Imagine #Submitted fic #submission #loki and the witchling #chapter 7 #nekoamamori

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findingpersonality · 3 years

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[Uhh, updates?]

Wow. I can’t remember the last time I’ve journaled here. Maybe its not the time passing by so quickly that I can’t remember, more like so much has just happened that I feel like there’s so many to write.

It’s been a year and a half now ever since the world became abnormal and we’re stuck at home. Home school, home socialization, home dating? So much has happened. So far, my life for the past few months have been one of the hardest ever since the pandemic.

Academic wise, after I got a university scholar tag on my first semester in remote learning, I thought that “wow, I’m really good at teaching myself.” So when I had my two months vacation after that, I still studied and completed my requirements. I really had no real vacation, because I chose to, and that’s okay I think, perfectly splendid (bly manor reference). Anyway, second semester started and I was really confident. I could’ve taken extra units instead of the recommended. Turns out, the first semesters’ subjects are easier than second ones, and I started losing grasps on my acads. There were two 1 week breaks, but I didn’t take a break. We quarantined for two weeks because my dad was a close contact of a covid positive. Those two weeks were so...hard. Our house this small, and I had to hear all the noise. We can’t go out, so my dad had to find something to do - meetings, craft things - all required noise. My brother’s cries wanting to go outside, my online meetings, my mom’s stressed mumblings because we always have a problem with where can we find food. It wasn’t the money, it’s whom we can request to find food for us because we can’t go out. I realized then how our nerighbor relatives don’t care for us, not one of them even asked us what we need. My tita from another town even drove to us to give groceries, the vendor whom mom always get vegetables gave us some, my lola who is quite old drops food on the door, but these people, who are two steps from our doorsteps can’t even ask how we are, even in social media. I don’t think this is an invalid thought. They expect so much from “kamag-anak naman” when it comes from requests, but I swear I can pick up people who have no blood ties from us that act more of a relative than them. I can’t remember how I survived or what I did during the day if not being stressed. My mental health started going downfall from that point. I had to catch up to a lot of backlogs, I had already run for secretary in niners before we were quarantined. Then finals week came, and I knew I’d get an inc in one of my subjects. When I was finishing up the requirement that would get me an inc instead of a drop, along with midyear registration, my lola died. That day I was in queue for registration but had to leave the meeting because my mom was crying so hard. Brave was sick, too, at the time. Mom and Lyza had also just gotten better from fever. I felt so numb that day. My mom keeps doing chores while crying, cooked us fried chicken because Brave won’t eat any other food. I did my requirements in blur, one instance was I was in a timed quiz and Brave puked in the blanket. On normal days I would’ve just said sorry to mom and that I can’t help clean things up, which was in front of me, because I’m in a timed quiz. But all throughout the quiz I was just stopping myself from crying. I’m in a fucking timed quiz that is my last chance to get an inc instead of dropped grade, my brother puked in the blanket in front of me, my mom weeps while cleaning up. I finished the quiz, my mom was done, and I went to the bathroom to take a bath and cry. That day was so hard, my mom didn’t and her first meal was dinner. The next day we travelled to Malabon. That day I had to register because I couldn’t the day before. I was set on not enlisting for a GE subject because I didn’t think I could take anymore - even if i might be delayed. That day I even just want to drop midyear completely, but I know I’ll regret it later. I was just tired, and overwhelmed. I already informed my adviser about my situation, but she keeps giving me cold replies about being delayed and being responsible to my decision. I just though, ma’am, I fucking know. I felt so tired physically and emotionally. The next days, I stayed up 3 nights to watch my lola for the funeral, slept during the day because we’re younger and can stay up late/all night. The last day of funeral was my first day of midyear class. I did a plate the next day since the burial day was moved a day later. We buried lola, went back to cavite. The moment I opened the lights our house was a mess. Not by a person - by rats. They didn’t destroyed most of our things, but their mess was everywhere. Tired from the burial day and the 3 hours travel, we had to change the bedsheets, dust the stuff, sweep and mop the floor with bleach. We basically had an impromptu general cleaning. The mcdo take out we ate after the cleaning had to be one of the best meals ever.

Home, that’s what I thought that time - even Brave. He suddenly was back to his loud, smiling self again at home. He was different back in manila - silent, timid and not moving much. He can really only be truly comfortable here in our small house.

My life continued after that. It was quite better. Orgwork, plates, I even had time for the paper quilling project I was working on. I also caught up with my friends. Kams, Pau, and me had time to hangout - I missed them so much. Pau is having a hard time with acads and maybe other stuff she doesn’t talk about too. Kams was away from here mom and sisters, and she’s not perfectly well either. But that night was so important for me. I miss them so bad. Gail, Erika, and me also hanged out - before we found a good movie it was so late. We talked and talked about the things we do, how are we doing mentally. Some moments were awkward - like we don’t know what to talk about. I found that quite cute actually. I appreciate spending time with each other so much despite not having much to talk about - I still look forward to talking to them again. Jernil also went to our house, it was so great. If I have one friend whom I know can accept me fully for who I am, who can get along with my family so well, who can read my face and my chats and my moods easily, who can give me so much respect and tell me my mistakes - its jernil. She’s one of my best friends and I can’t live without her. Just hours ago - Shalom also chatted me after almost a year. She’s anxious about reaching out to friends - something I can relate to. It was a short talk - about 20 mins, and I invited her to hangout with some of our friends again. Shalom and I have a relationship bonded by deep talks. We rarely talk, and reached out each other when we needed advice, I once called her while crying ugly at dorm when I was so tired of everything - and I needed to hear someone’s voice. She quite saved me from being crazy when she answered that call, and I’ll never forget that.

And here I am now, writing this. I was lying down after doing a plate, and I said I’d think tonight. I’m listening to Meltt - a band I fell in love to because of Josh. I was thinking of Josh before I wrote this, when I first listened to Meltt because it was in his Bumble bio. Almost a year ago we were just talking like new friends do - what we do in life, principles, what we like in ourselves. How I gradually fell in love with him - still am falling til now actually. The times I’m listening to this music while thinking of how wonderful of a talker and a person he is. The day we first met - I can’t describe the warmth I feel in my heart, and in the veins of my hands whenever I think of him so close to me, finally. Now we are approaching our 7 month together. How I am not really that giddy to talk to him now - because he became my home, my comfort, my silence, my peace.

So much to talk about right? Time seemed to fly so past. Sobrang dami kong narerealize about myself. Time is gold talaga these days. Even if it seems like sobrang dami mong time in your hands, every minute seems so important. Every minute you spend doing different things required so much energy from you. And I learned to prioritize and give time to things that are important to me. My acads, my skills, my hobbies, the people I love, securing my future, etc. If before, spending time with each ot these planets that make up my solar system was a natural thing, this pandemic it slowly became a task that I have to allot time and energy for. And I take care of myself so I can have the energy. And it’s always gonna be worth it, going through all the hassles - because it makes me happy. My planets gives me purpose and genuine happiness.

P.S. I missed writing my thoughts like these. Just for myself - transparent and peaceful. I’m glad for this day. The world is hell, but this life is still worth living, indeed.

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tisfan · 6 years

Note

I would love to read something from you with 11. Nutcracker, B - Clint/Coulson. (P.S. I love your blog)

“That,”Clint said, looking up at the gaudy light display on the top shelf. “I wantthat.”

“In front of our home?” Phil wasless enthusiastic, but they’d already been to four stores before Clint hadfound what he wanted, and Phil was more of a throw-up-a-string-of-lights andcall-it-good kinda guy. Clint, on the other hand, had grown up in the circus,and he had actual legit feelings about Christmas and decorating.

“Yep,” Clint said. “Have to haveit.”

Well, it wasn’t like Phil minded.Mostly. They’d finally moved out of SHIELD supplied housing – which hadn’tkept them from sharing a bed, but there really wasn’t much privacy, or space –and into their own house. And it was their first Christmas together. Clint haddeclared that decorating was a must, and so he’d been hauling Phil all over theplace, looking for the perfect tree, the perfect ornaments, the perfect lights,and the perfect…

… giant life size polyresinnutcracker with an automatically opening and closing mouth and that randomlyraised its life size polyresin sword when someone approached it.

The price tag was a littleoff-putting. And the display itself slightly more creepy Christmas thanbringing Holiday cheer, but Phil considered himself a reasonable guy. He didn’thave any particular objections to the thing, although it certainly wasn’tsomething he’d have selected on his own. Who knew, though? It could be one ofthose things that became a thing. A relationship thing. Phil was lookingforward to having those.

“You have eight hundred dollarsburning a hole in your pocket, Barton?” Phil asked, peering up at it.

Clint shrugged. “I can afford it,”he said.

“Good afternoon, gentlemen,” anoverly cheerful voice said. “Help you with something?”

“Yep,” Clint said. “I want one ofthose.”

(more below the cut, or read the whole thing on A03)

The employee stared up at thefestive monstrosity. “Right, well, that’s an A-17, so they should be right thisway.”

He led them up through the aisle,dodging other shoppers, employees, and one display of solar lawn lights thathad fallen over. Phil paused to pick some of them up and put them back in thestack, where a half-dozen more promptly rolled off the pallet on the otherside. Fuck it, he decided, catching up with his boyfriend.

“Aw, nutcracker, no,” Clint waswhining. The slot on the shelf where the boxes were supposed to be was empty.

“Hang on, hang on,” the employeesaid. He whipped out a phone wrapped in a ridiculously orange case, did a scanof the SPU code. “It says we have six, hang on, just a moment. Stay here.” Hepointed to a spot on the floor like he was afraid that Clint and Phil wouldwander off.

Clint stood right where the guypointed, admiring some of the other decorations from his vantage point, whilePhil perused the shelves to see if one had gotten misplaced.

How, he wondered, did anyonemisplace six giant nutcrackers?

“This is Gerry,” their salespersonsaid, coming back up, “and she’s in charge of the garden center. So she’s goingto help you out, okay?”

Gerry was a tiny, tiny woman,probably in her mid-seventies, with a smudge of dirt on her nose and apractical tilt to her mouth. “You want that? You’re sure? Come on, this way, Ithink we got some more of these big’uns in the outdoor area.”

For a short, elderly woman, Gerrywalked very quickly. Hell, Clint and Phil were both trained government agents,and keeping up with her as she dodged around displays and talked a mile aminute over her shoulder, was taxing. In the few minutes it took to cross thestore, she’d told them all about two botched deliveries, the fact thatpointsettas were on sale, but she wouldn’t advise buying them because they werewithin three days of wilting, that they could apply for a store credit card andget twenty-percent off their first purchase, and if they wanted to, please feelfree to ask her, or any other store rep, and…

It was cold in the garden center;the whole area was open on the sides and the wind blew straight through,smelling of snow and exhaust and sausages from a street vendor outside thebuilding. Phil pulled his jacket tighter and shivered. It’d been hot in thestore proper.

“Well, they were here, I couldasworn…” She stopped in front of a large pallet of decorative boxes, none ofwhich was labeled as an A-17. “David! David!”

A third employee appeared – David,apparently – from behind a display. “Hey, did you find out about the 1063-RRcluster? I’ve been online with–”

“Not jus’ yet. Do you know whathappened to them nutcrackers we were s’posed to have? All the overstock shouldbe here?”

“Dunno,” David said. “We got a newdelivery in th’ back, though, truck just left outta here like twenty minutesago. I really need to know about them 1063s, though, so if you could–” he wastalking to air, Gerry having walked off, gesticulating wildly. “Huh. Okay,well, you all stay here, I bet she’s going to check the back.”

“She couldn’t have left us inside?”Phil complained. “It’s cold out here.”

Clint leaned against Phil’s back,arms around his chest, keeping him warm. “Better, babe?”

“You do give off a lot of bodyheat,” Phil replied. He leaned back into that warmth, snuggling contentedly.

“It’s my superpower,” Clint saidsmugly.

“I thought your superpower wasalways being in the way,” Phil said.

“Well, that, too,” Clint said. “Ican have more than one superpower. It’s allowed.”

Gerry was gone longer than expected– how hard was it to find a six foot tall nutcracker? Hard, apparently. Shecame back, shaking her head.

“The inventory says we have six,but see, there’s a little star by it,” Gerry said, holding out her phone. “Thatmeans it wasn’t actually verified on delivery. That happens a lot this time ofyear, really–”

“Excuse me, miss,” another customersaid, “this’ll only take a minute, but I was wondering if you knew where Imight find suction cups to hang on windows to hold lights up with?”

“Oh! I saw those!” Clint said,excited. “Like, just a few minutes ago, because I wondered what they were for,but yeah, this way, they’re over here.”

Phil found himself abandoned by hisboyfriend, and blinking politely at Gerry. “So, you don’t know where thenutcracker is?”

She shook her head. “It might noteven be here,” she said. “This time of year, we’re so busy that people don’talways check in the stock, we just take it on faith that we got what weordered.”

“So, my boyfriend really wants thatthing, do you think you could sell us your floor model?”

“Oh, no, no, we never do that, evenafter the holiday is over, people expect a discount on it, and it’s not listedin the inventory at all, so we can’t account for ‘em.”

“Since you’re missing six already,I’d say you’re not accounting for them now,” Phil pointed out.

“Look, what I can do is call ourstore out in Passaic, maybe they have one,” Gerry suggested. “Inventory saysthey have five.”

“You want me to drive all the wayout to New Jersey. On the weekend. During the Christmas season, onthe hopes that their inventory is better than yours?”

“I don’t want you to do anything,young man,” Gerry responded, tartly. “You’re the one who wants a nutcrackerporch deco. I’m telling you where there might be one.”

Phil heaved a sigh. “Give me theaddress.”

“Aw, decoration, no,” Clint whined.

Phil took a deep breath. “Can youcall the other store and see if they have any? Like, do an actual floor check?We already drove out from the city, and Westville’s not that much further downthe road, but I’d rather be sure than chase after another wild goose.”

“Inventory shows they got fourteenof ‘em,” the Passaic employee insisted.

“And yours says you’ve got five,and the store back in Manhattan said they had six, so that’s eleven six-footnutcrackers you’ve managed to misplace between two stores,” Phil said. “You cansee why I might be a little leery of your computer’s inventory report?”

The Passaic employee sighed likemaking a phone call was the hardest thing anyone had ever asked of him, ever,but punched in the number.

“We don’t gotta get it,” Clintsaid, softly. “We can just go home an–”

“You want it,” Phil said.

“Well, yeah, but–”

“Then we’re going to see if we canfind you one, dear,” Phil said, patting Clint’s hand. “It’s all right. Wedidn’t really have anything else to do today.”

“Driving around New Jersey isn’tsomethin’ any sane person does for fun,” Clint said.

Phil chuckled at that. “It’s notthat bad, really. I’ve been worse places.”

“Like?”

“Tahiti.”

Clint made a face. “That joke’sold, Phil. Like, seriously. Old. And it wasn’t funny t’ start with.”

“Okay,” the Passaic employee said. “Theydid a floor check, an’ they got at least four of them, so, what’s your name?”

“Coulson,” Phil said.

The guy turned back to his phone,then, “Yeah, okay, so when you get there, go up to the service counter, andthey’ll have one all ready to go, okay?”

“Thank you for your help,” Philsaid.

The employee didn’t quite roll hiseyes, but Phil got the distinct feeling that he wantedto.

“Can I shoot him?” Clint asked,when they got out of earshot.

“If we’re going to be exactingabout it, then yes, you’re perfectly capable of shooting him, with whateveryour weapon of choice is, from your bow all the way to the staple gun on aisletwelve, but I would greatly prefer it if you did not, because I really don’twant to deal with any more paperwork about your disruptions of normal holidaycommerce,” Phil said.

“You are no fun,” Clint said.

“That’s not what you said lastnight,” Phil pointed out.

“And it’s not what I’ll saytonight, either,” Clint said, sneaking in a stealth grope. “But you’re no fun right now.”

“You wanna swap tonight for rightnow, go ahead and shoot the guy.”

“Hmmm, no.”

“You did what?”

“Well, he was here first,” thewoman behind the customer-service desk said. “And he bought out the entirestock–”

“We were on our way,” Clint protested. “What did he need with twelve nutcrackers?”

“He was here,” she repeated. “Andwe don’t hold orders for people, that’s just not good business practice.”

Phil’s eyebrows went way up. “Howlong ago did he leave?”

The woman shrugged. “Do I look likea stalker to you?”

“No, you look like a bitch, but youknow, close enough,” Clint snapped. He smacked the palm of his hand against thedesk and stomped out.

“Thanks for shopping with us, comeagain.” the desk lady said, overly chipper.

Phil considered himself a reasonablehuman being, but Clint’s plan of shooting store employees suddenly seemed alittle less ridiculous and a lot more satisfying.

“Sorry we wasted th’ whole day,”Clint said, slumping up the sidewalk toward their house.

“It wasn’t a waste,” Phil said,grabbing Clint’s hand and giving his fingers a squeeze. “I like spending timewith you. Just because you don’t always get what you want doesn’t mean it was awaste of–” Phil stumbled to a halt.

“What the utter and complete fuck?”

“What he said,” Phil repeated.“Only with less swearing and more shock.”

The entire walkway was lined withnutcrackers. Six to each side, raising their swords in unison, mouths openingand closing.

“Hey, guys! Agent Agent, Legolas!Merry Christmas,” Tony Stark said, stepping out from behind one of thedisplays. “You like ‘em? I saw on social media that you were looking for themand–”

“You’re the one who bought out theentire stock?”

“Well, not me, personally, no,because really, no, I have shoppers for that sort of thing, but–” Tony’sbrilliant smile faltered. “You don’t like it?”

Clint and Phil exchanged a glanceand said everything they needed to say right then. They could explain to Tonyhow they’d driven all over the state trying to find the nutcracker and comehome disappointed and hungry and cranky…

Or they could just say, “We loveit. Thank you, Tony.”

“Merry Christmas, Mr. Stark,” Philsaid.

“Merry Christmas to you, too, AgentCoulson,” Tony said, offering a hand.

Phil took Tony’s hand, yanked himinto a hug, and pounded him on the back. “Thank you, really,” he said.

Clint hugged them both, squeezinghard. “Yeah, you’re the best, man, just… wow.”

“So, like, are these in the song?”Tony asked.

“What song?”

“The Twelve Days of Christmas?”

“Like, what? Twelve nutcrackersnutting?”

“Thanks for that, Clint,” Philsaid, covering his eyes. “Now I’m going to think about Christmas displaysjerking off for the entire rest of the season.”

“Annnnd on that note, I’m sure Ihave something more important to do,” Tony said. He jogged up the walk towardhis very expensive car. He turned halfway up the walk and waved. “MerryChristmas to all, and to all a good wank.”

#Clint/Coulson #holiday ficlet #stocking stuffers #nutcracker #clint barton #phil coulson #Tony Stark #ayremis

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