#or if his devotion to Bucky outweighs the pain he feels over not getting to BE with him | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

greyhavensking · 2 years

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I’ve had this bouncing around in my head for a while, but seeing as everyone likes to debate when Steve and Bucky really got together, I thought it was worth sharing why I personally, firmly headcanon them to have only started a relationship, at the earliest, in 1943.

On Steve’s end, he’s been in love with Bucky since he was sixteen, and he hasn’t been afraid of it in all that time. He knows what he feels is true and pure and that nothing society says could make him feel disgusted with himself. And he’s not stupid, okay? He understands the risks. And he’s not reckless (he is, but with himself, and this isn’t the point here anyway) — he wouldn’t try to be more open about it than Bucky was comfortable with, wouldn’t even try to get him to do anything outside the apartment if that’s what it took.

But Bucky. Bucky’s afraid. Whereas Steve would rather die knowing he stayed true to himself and confessed his feelings for the love of his life, Bucky just wants Steve alive. He loves Steve with everything in him, but because he loves him so much, he restrains himself. Steve already has so many targets on his back — why would Bucky willingly add another one? Worse, it would only confirm what people already suspect about Steve. It’s why Bucky bothers with the double dates, the constant charm and flirting; he sees himself as a shield for Steve.

But when he gets drafted, and Steve really does follow him to the front lines, Bucky’s worst fears have already come true. He’s almost died, and Steve has irrevocably wedged himself into the war efforts. The odds that they both come back alive from this are astronomically low, in his opinion. So what does it matter if they’re in love now? Steve’s got a new shield, a better one; he doesn’t need Bucky anymore, not like that. He can let himself love Steve, and accept Steve’s love.

He can let himself find happiness in his darkest moments.

#stucky #stevebucky #on the other than Bucky has the potential to withdraw even further from Steve post-rescue #because something’s wrong and nothing about him is pure anymore #he can’t stain Steve with this. with him #so he buries it #looks to Steve as his best friend and his captain and nothing more #and it’s only after he’s broken his conditioning in 2014 that he sees all the time he’s wasted not loving Steve to the fullest #I go back and forth on whether or not steve dates in the intervening years #or if his devotion to Bucky outweighs the pain he feels over not getting to BE with him #I like them being each other’s firsts though so I tend to lean into the latter option

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buckywintersoldierbarnes2017 · 7 years

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A Reason To Fight.

Request from anon: Would you mind writing about this little girl(about 4) who is Bucky's daughter but she doesn't know. Kinda like in the movie Logan. Hydra has her and made her from his DNA or something but when he comes back from a mission he sees her walking around and hears some doctors talking about how she's his daughter so when he escapes hydra he comes back to get her and is on the run with her too. Srry its long :)

Note: I know this doesn’t touch on their life on the run at all but I hope you enjoy this anyway <3

Winter Soldier x Young Daughter

Words: 1,879

Warnings: Language, violence, torment and fluff.

Disclaimer: None of the GIFs used are mine so all credit goes to their creators <3

A fist came flying towards the enhanced soldier and immediately he ducked away from it before finding himself having to doge another one that came towards him from the other side. The person trying to take him down was sweating profusely, chest heaving from their heavy pants, a complete contrast to the calm composure of the dark haired soldier they were fighting. To him this was nothing – he knew every move before the male even made it, like he could read his very thoughts, so the likelihood of him landing any hit on him was slim to none.

One of the many reasons why he was Hydra’s top asset. He was unstoppable.

A door opened at the other end of the corridor to the room he was in but he didn’t take his sharp blue eyes off the person in front of him, not until he heard a sound that was completely alien to this place…..a child’s voice. He knew that they often trained young children over in the Red Room but they never occupied the halls here so immediately confusion set in as he turned towards the source of the sound to confirm whether he was simply hearing things.

He wasn’t really expecting to see what he’d thought he heard but a child was the very thing his gaze fell on at the moment a fist connected with the back of his head.

His whole body tensed, both fists clenching at either side of him, as an animal-like growl rolled off his lips. Not only was he annoyed that he had lost his focus and been hit but the fact that the other male had performed such a cowardly move, well, it infuriated the super soldier beyond belief. Spinning round on the balls of his feet his metal arm shot out and his hand immediately wrapped around his throat, squeezing it tightly before the man had chance to say anything, and he pushed his face so close to him that his breath moved the strands of the incapacitated male’s hair.

“You want to take someone down you damn well do it face to face….not to their back you fucking coward!”

Throwing his head back he returned it swiftly so that his forehead met harshly with the male’s. It was done with such force that it left a visual dent and knocked him out instantly. The brunette’s lips curled up into a snarl as he released his grip and let the unconscious heap fall to the floor. Once that particular nuisance had been dealt with he pushed his body up against the wall nearest the door so that he could hear the conversation going on outside and occasionally pop his head around the frame too.

“You will not be training with the other children little one. Your place is here.”

The young dark-haired child nodded her head in response, a blank expression on her face, unaware that she was being watched by someone she had never met. She didn’t look any older than three, maybe even four, years old but she carried herself as though she was much older.

“You were created with the help of our best asset and so we expect many great things from you. Until you are ready to train with him you are to remain in your room. There will be no wandering of the halls unless you are escorted by one of our guards.”

The soldier hadn’t felt any emotions aside from anger for a number of years now so when an unfamiliar sensation started to tug at his stomach he wasn’t sure how to take it…other to become even angrier. They had taken something from him to create a new weapon….one that would, no doubt, be used against him once he had exceeded his usefulness.

How fucking dare they.

If he wasn’t having to prepare for a mission the following day he would have risked having his mind wiped again just to give them a few choice words.

* * * * * * * * * *

He had never run so fast and so far in his whole life, well, the fragments of it that he could remember anyway, but he knew he needed to get as far away from the scene as he could. His best friend, someone he had so very nearly forgotten even existed, had just almost been killed because of his fucked up mind. Remembering the actions that almost cost his friend his life wasn’t the only horror racing through him right now though….he was remembering the pain, the horrific pain he’d had to endure each time Hydra had wiped his mind.

The fearful super soldier felt sick….he couldn’t go back to them. He couldn’t be the monster they had created.

But then another image appeared in his mind, one of a young child, an innocent little girl who was about to be corrupted by the sickness that was Hydra. His little girl. She may not have been his in the conventional way but she still had his DNA running through her. They had ripped both his past and his future from him but he was damned if he sat back and allowed them to do the same to her.

He slammed his metal fist into a nearby tree, almost ripping it from its very roots, as a wave of both anger and hurt washed over him. Going back for her was going to be risky; if they caught him he would be wiped yet again, but the scenarios that could happen should he succeed far outweighed anything else. He could devote his time to protecting her, shielding her from the same kind of harm he had been put through, and in return she would unknowingly give him what he needed to stop himself from losing his mind again.

It was decided. He was going to get her out of there…..and take down every damn man that got in his way.

* * * * * * * * * *

In one swift movement he broke the neck of the eighth Hydra agent to come his way since he broke into the compound. The ninth one, however, wasn’t killed outright. He knew he was getting closer to the girl but there would be security to bypass to get into her room…..and that was exactly what this particular cretin was going to do for him. After knocking the agent’s gun out of his grip metal fingers wrapped around his throat; not enough that he would eventually pass out but enough to make sure he wouldn’t try to go anywhere anytime soon…given by the sheer look of panic on his face and the childish whimper that was constantly escaping from him the pathetic little agent was sure to try at least….unless he wet his pants beforehand.

Both had been possible scenarios until the Winter Soldier’s fingers snaked around his throat.

“If you value your life at all then I suggest you do as you are told and get me into that room.”

“Yo-You are a traitor soldier! Hyd-Hydra will not stan-“

Not the correct answer at all. The brunette’s top lip curled up into a nasty snarl, his grip tightening, and when the young male could feel his very airway beginning to crush he cried out in a hoarse voice due to the restricted supply of air he was now experiencing.

“Co-Code! You need a code!”

“Ah……so you do have a brain in there then? There’s hope yet. What is the code.”

Dragging him down the corridor, using the grip on his throat to be able to do so, he stopped as they reached the door he knew her to be behind and yanked the man back onto his feet so that he could look him right in the eyes. The look in his own was dark and calculating showing that he was not wanting to be messed around.

“5….2…..1…..” The numbers left him at an achingly slow pace, almost as though he was hoping that if he dragged it out long enough someone would eventually show up, but the sound of a growl snapped him out of any kind of hopeful thought. “6, 8, 9.”

The keypad attached to the wall lit up green and the smallest hint of a smile showed on his face.

“Now….Now can you let me go?”

He didn’t even bother to look at the man; his eyes never leaving the door before him, as a menacing laugh started to build up inside of him before rolling off his lips as he squeezed so tight that the guy never stood a chance as his airway was completely destroyed.

“Stupid fool. I was never going to let you live.”

They had turned him into a monster and now they were going to feel the pain that they had made him inflict upon hundreds, maybe even thousands, of innocent people. It was their turn to face their demise. In the form of the one thing that they had created to be their greatest weapon.

Stepping over the lifeless body that now lay at his feet he opened the door and stepped inside the small room that had lay behind it. The young girl he had come for was stood in the centre of the room, not even showing the slightest bit of fear in her sharp blue eyes, a mirror image of his, as she looked upon his intimidating form. If anything, there seemed to be a flicker of hope inside of them, at least that’s what he assumed it was…..it wasn’t something he had really come across over the decades he had spent here so he could have been mistaken.

It was confirmed soon enough though when he saw her small frame racing over to him and her arms immediately wrapping around his knees and although he was taken aback by her sudden proximity he looked down at the innocent little smile lighting up her delicate features and his whole stance relaxed a little more. They hadn’t got to her yet……he’d got here in time.

“Are you my Papa?”

A strange feeling hit his eyes at her words and as he raised his flesh hand up towards his right one he could feel the tear slipping out and rolling down his cheek. Love. That’s what this was…..he had never spent any time with the young girl currently clinging onto him but he knew from that moment that he wasn’t going to let her suffer the same way he had done.

“I am…..and we are getting out of here.” Leaning down ever so slightly he picked her up in his arms and walked out of the room she had been confined to. Holding her as close as he could to his body he brushed a stray strand of hair away from her face and smiled down at her. “I can’t promise I will be the perfect father little one, or that we will have the perfect life but I will keep you safe.”

Her tiny hand travelled up to his rough cheek, a thumb caressing his skin, as she closed her eyes and nuzzled her face into the black jacket he was wearing. Before she fell asleep she uttered just two words.

“Thank you.”

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#a reason to fight #bucky x young daughter #the winter soldier #hydra #the winter soldier x child #marvel imagine #steve rogers #captain america #james bucky barnes #not my gifs #request #answered #sebastian stan #buckywintersoldierbarnes2017 #james buchanan barnes

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