#one kick lady saitama
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I just thought of f!saitama and genos doing couples halloween costumes as Jessica and roger rabbit BUT genos is Jessica and f!saitama would be roger it just fits better genos is the more fashionable one and taller and saitama is more funny
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Having brain rot thinking of an au where saitama fubuki and tatsumaki are all siblings and saitama was sold off as a baby before tatsumaki and fubuki were sold off (before fubuki is born of course) except he’s not exhibiting psychic powers so they sell him to a woman to cook and clean for her. Tatsumaki is like 3 when saitama is born and only remembers his name.
After blast helps her out when she was in containment, she broke into the associations files and found a picture of her parents, with her dad having spiky black hair, and records that confirm Saitama’s existence. So she gets out of there obvi and grabs Fubuki, then she makes money from doing odd jobs with her powers so she can take care of her and eventually they have a house to themselves and tatsumaki is taking care of her, and all this time she’s been trying to find saitama, even hiring a private investigator at one point.
It isn’t until she’s 10, saitama is 7 and fubuki is 4 that she finally tracks him down herself, which was hard bc he had no psychic brainwaves to track him with and he looks super generic. So she finds him and saves him from a mean old lady who uses him as a slave basically, making him cook and clean constantly, though he tells tatsumaki he doesn’t mind cooking that much (weird kid, she thinks). She immediately knows it’s him because he’s got their father’s hair.
So she takes him home and takes care of him and Fubuki, and she makes sure no one hurts them or bullies them, so much so that her power becomes a legend and everyone is too scared to go near their house. Of course, she’s fiercely overprotective so saitama and fubuki don’t really have friends, which saitama is fine with while fubuki suffers, only having Psykos by her side growing up.
Saitama is a lot like his canon self and doesn’t have much interest in doing much with his life except for heroism because he grew up watching his oldest sister kick ass and he wanted to be like her since, though he’d never admit that. Fubuki wants to do more, like become an actress or activist or something, but she becomes a hero and makes the blizzard group for the same reason in canon: to become strong enough to support her sister.
Because tatsumaki is still very distant despite her overbearing nature, so Fubuki worries, of course. Saitama cares too, but he elected to be the sibling to give Tatsu space and let her come around to them herself. Fubuki often argues with him about this, saying he should step up and help her have an intervention with tatsu, but he argues back that the more they push her on this, the more they push her away, so he refuses. (This happens through saitama and fubuki’s teenage years up to in canon, when saitama is 25 and fubuki 23).
I’ve got a lot more ideas for this and sketches in my head but I’m too tired 😭 maybe later lol. But basically, pretty dysfunctional and they’re all mentally ill obvi, but they love each other fiercely and try to hang out or at least call like once every two weeks bc they’re so tightly knit
#opm#one punch man#opm au#Saitama#Tatsumaki#Fubuki#psychic fam au#I also want tatsuking genosai and fubukos in this au#I think it would be epic#basically my solution to shipping saitama w Tatsu or Fubuki bc those ships r so uncomfy
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Hunger
Archive of our own
Fandom: ワンパンマン | One-Punch Man
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Characters: Saitama (One-Punch Man)
Additional Tags: Slice of Life, food insecurity, hunger, Poverty
Without money and without food, what is Saitama to do other than go hungry?
Saitama was a mess. He looked at himself in the mirror and saw a gaunt face with a half-bald head looking back at him with dead fish eyes. He really missed having proper hair, being half-bald like this really looked ugly. The grocery store had even fired him because he was apparently scaring customers with his lack of hair. Some people had even called him awful names like kappa-demon. So now he was without food, without money and the hunger in his stomach growled at him to eat something, anything at all. He only had bananas next to the refrigerator table for breakfast, lunch and dinner and he didn’t know where to get more food. He was really at rock bottom situation-wise.
Saitama sighed. This wasn’t really a good day at all. He looked back into the mirror, the image of himself not changing and all he wanted to do was to pull at his remaining hair in frustration. He had tried to get work from other places, but nobody wanted to hire him because he looked like an old hobo with his head half-bald like this. His savings had run dry too, which was really bad because he couldn’t afford anymore food. The only silver lining was that he lived in Z-city in an abandoned house without paying any rent or utilities, so that was a plus. Least he wouldn’t end up kicked out and homeless for being unable to pay rent.
Saitama exited the bathroom with another sigh. Time to go outside for a monster patrol. Though he wondered what good would that do, in his current state. He had become far too strong for the average monster out there and easily defeated all the monsters that he came across. Maybe he would get lucky and find money for groceries instead.
With a plan in mind to scour the ground for some cash, Saitama dressed in his hero suit and set out for a walk, stomach still mildly hurting from hunger pangs. Any food would be welcome right now.
After walking to the outskirts of Z-city, defeating a couple monsters in the way but not seeing any cash or even edible monsters along the way, Saitama had almost given up hope in eating something substantial today besides yet another banana. Then his eyes spotted something on the ground and he rushed to grab it in excitement, only to see it was no cash at all.
“Hm, coupons?” He mused aloud to himself. He examined the small wad of coupons in his hands and saw they were coupons for a free buffet nearby which he had never visited before.
Saitama could almost cry then and there, because he was so hungry he could eat a horse. A free buffet sounded delightful and the coupon stack could give him food for a week, so he could at least get one good dinner from the eatery.
Saitama rushed to the buffet restaurant in question, thanking the lucky stars for this break.
--
When he arrived, he saw the place was manned by cooks in the background, a peppy female cashier in front and a heavenly smell wafted to his nostrils which almost made him drool.
“Hello and welcome to Hero’s dinery, are you here to eat lunch in our buffet? Heroes get a discount,” the cashier informed him in a kind voice. Saitama supposed he still looked like a hero, even with a half-bald head.
“Uh yes, I’m a hero…” Saitama mumbled ‘for a hobby’ too low for the lady to hear him, but then he pulled out the coupons he had found from the ground. “These coupons are for a free buffet, right?”
“Yes indeed, one coupon for one serving in our all-you-can-eat buffet. Would you like to use one coupon now?”
“Yes please,” he said and handed over one of the seven coupons.
“Thank you,” the cashier said after taking the offered coupon and ringing it up, “you can find cutlery and plates right behind you,” she continued and pointed behind Saitama, where a stack of plates, trays, paper towels and cutlery were indeed neatly stacked for customers.
“Uh, thanks,” Saitama awkwardly thanked the cashier lady and set out to grab his tray, plate and other utensils he needed for the buffet. The smell of food made his stomach growl and he ended up eating large platefulls, taking seconds and little bits of everything and contemplated on thirds but his stomach was almost bursting at the seams when he was done. He forgot the decorum of eating small portions but at least nobody was staring at him gorging like a pig on good food, which was a first. The other medley of heroes visiting the place were too busy eating the delectable cuisine to care about him, of which he was grateful.
The cashier bowed him goodbye as he exited and cheerfully told him to come again, even as Saitama was holding his stomach walking out. He decided he would take a nap once he reached home, because all this eating left him pleasantly drowsy, if with a bit of a stomach ache, but he could handle a full stomach ache any day of the week rather than the painful hunger he had been subjected to.
He even managed to snag a newspaper on the way home which advertised that they were looking for an employee for a haunted house, something Saitama could definitely do considering his current ugly looks. He didn’t need to look like a pretty boy to get a job to dress up as a ghost at least and he still had his salaryman uniform in the closet, ready for a job interview.
Once back home, Saitama undressed and rolled out his futon, settling down for a nap and thought about how life was finally smiling at him.
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Division Battle Anthem (Femme Fatale & CodeX Ver.)
Bring The Beat!
[Sayaka:]
What could it be?
Is it a bird? Is it a plane?
No, just a butterfly
Sayaka is my name.
I may not look much
But don’t underestimate me
With my mic and my ladies
You can’t beat us three
Try to keep up with these rhymes
When you’re against Femme Fatale
It’s gonna be a bad time
Can you feel it?
Cracking under pressure
Maybe next time, try again better.
[Ritsuko:]
Are you done yet?
Good God, you’re annoying
All bark and no bite
How disappointing
Shinagawa is the city
Home to the ambitious and witty
And where foolish creatures
Receive no pity
Let me tell you this now
Trying to cross me
Isn’t something I allow
But since your skull’s so thick
I’ll make this quick
The poison in my rhymes
Will make you more than sick
— [All:] —
Rise up, gladiator!
Back off, wussy hater!
The Hypnosis Mic is mightier than the sword
The punchline decides winners and losers
BANG! BANG! BANG!
Adrenaline!
PUMP! PUMP! PUMP!
You have no choice, it's kill or get killed
Don't look back!
Welcome to the division
Welcome to the division (Oh yeah)
Welcome to the division
Hypnosis busting out this masterpiece!
Remember, don't look back!
[Lola:]
Who’s that alluring beauty? That’s me!
The one and only, Aphrodite!
Femme Fatale’s princess
One of Saitama’s best
I’m not an easy one to impress
Watch your mouth, I’m no dumb blonde
And I’ll happily volunteer to prove you wrong
With a sharp tongue and a beautiful face
It’ll take seconds to put you in your place
[Miho:]
Something is bound to go amiss
There’s work to be done, I have no time for this!
The responsibility I carry is weary and laden
But that’s no excuse to fuck with Iron Maiden
Too late to turn back, you know what you’re getting into
I’ll barely break a sweat after I’m through with you
Kicking you down while I rise to the top
No one will stand in my way, I will continue nonstop.
— [All:] —
Rise up, Gladiator!
Back off, wussy hater!
The Hypnosis Mic is mightier than the sword
The punchline decides winners and losers
BANG! BANG! BANG!
Adrenaline!
PUMP! PUMP! PUMP!
You have no choice, it's kill or get killed
Don't look back!
Welcome to the division
Welcome to the division (Oh yeah)
Welcome to the division
Hypnosis busting out this masterpiece!
Remember, don't look back!
[Kureha:]
I can see it now in my mind’s eye
It’s really sad, watching you die
But there’s no need to have any complaints
I’ll use your bones to sculpture
And your blood as my paint
That should make you think twice
If you mess with my city
I won’t be nice
The end of your life, your decimation
Will play a big part in my next creation
[Sumire:]
The end of corruption is what I yearn
So sit back and relax and watch
As I let this world burn
I’m a real life demon
You stand no chance against me
So get ready to be beaten
Hanging by a thread
Are you losing your nerve?
Good, everyone watch and observe
As you get what you deserve.
[Sayaka:]
Against any threat, my city, I will protect!
[Lola:]
You’re so predictable, such a bore.
[Ritsuko:]
You’re not even worth experimenting
[Miho:]
I’m gonna wipe you on the floor!
[Sayaka:]
Your power, I’ll waive!
[Kureha:]
We’ll send you to your grave!
[Lola:]
Don’t even try to misbehave~
[Sumire:]
Your reign ends here!
[Ritsuko:]
I can see the fear in your eyes
[Kureha:]
We won’t give in!
[Miho:]
Music to my ears, hearing your cries.
[Sumire:]
I’ll laugh watching as you die~
[Femme Fatale:]
Roar, my Hypnosis Mic!
[CodeX:]
Kneel down and beg for forgiveness!
— [All:] —
Rise up, Gladiator!
Back off, wussy hater!
The Hypnosis Mic is mightier than the sword
The punchline decides winners and losers
BANG! BANG! BANG!
Adrenaline!
PUMP! PUMP! PUMP!
You have no choice, it's kill or get killed
Don't look back!
We've got major beef, now we settle it
Roar, my Hypnosis Mic
Customized to reach your mind directly
Rhymes to stir up your brain fluids
We're the Trinity, it's showtime
We'll rock you with our vibes
Hypnosis busting out this masterpiece!
Remember, don't look back
It's kill or get killed
So don't look back!
#hypmic#hypnosis mic#hypnosis microphone#hypmic oc#hypnosis mic oc#saitama division#femme fatale#sayaka miyuki#lola takahashi#kureha koizumi#shinagawa division#codex#ritsuko okada#miho kobayashi#sumire shinomiya
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Headline Pt 2 - Kuroo Tetsurou
AU: Parent
FEM! Reader
Word Count: 2.7k
Pt 1 | Pt 2 | Pt 3
“No activity at Kuroo and girlfriend’s apartment. Strange? Did they move?”
Kuroo made it a point to not look at the media anymore. There were too many lies and it made his blood boil, but at least the lies were better than what actually happened.
All of them were better than what happened.
The first night without you, he woke up without you beside him and felt wrong. When he finally got out of bed, he looked around the bedroom and didn’t see your stuff littered around and that made his heart drop. The last straw was not seeing you in the kitchen, baking or smiling, and it made his stomach turn.
After that night, he couldn’t stay there anymore. The apartment was empty without you.
Later that day, volleyball practice was a mess, it was even worse than the game he did earlier that week. His couch must have known what happened from the look on his face, but, thankfully, didn’t say anything.
He gave Kuroo the week off which he gladly accepted.
He went back to the apartment one last time and packed all of the things that he needed and headed over to Kenma’s. Kenma’s house always acted as a safe haven for him. It’s the place he would go to after the two of you fought, but Kenma would always kick him out before he could suggest sleeping over.
“Get out and fix your argument. You’re only going to make things worse if you hide,” Kenma would say, and then slam the door in his face.
However, when Kenma opened the door this time and saw Kuroo’s tear-stained face with bags in hand, he didn’t say anything and just opened the door. Kuroo never went over to Kenma’s house with open tears, usually, he would suck it up like a man and cry in the car ride over, but wipe his face before he rang Kenma’s doorbell.
For a while, all he did was stare at the ceiling, rejecting all of the offers Kenma gave him like water and trying to talk about it. It was only later in the night when Kuroo spilled his guts about anything.
Kenma listened carefully, never judging, but a worried expression rested on his face. “She just left?”
Kuroo wiped his cheek and took a sip of water. “Yeah...she did. I don’t blame her though...I’m just worried about her. She doesn’t have a good relationship with her parents, so she wouldn’t go there, and most of her friends live within 20 minutes of us and she’s not with any of them. She’s gone.”
“Kuroo…”
“And she’s pregnant,” Kuroo sobbed, “she’s probably scared, tired, holy shit. What did I do?”
“Kuroo…”
Kuroo looked up at Kenma. Kenma’s eyes widened in shock. He’s never seen Kuroo like this…
“I left her alone, Kenma,” he whispered. “I left her alone.”
Kuroo kept mumbling to himself like that until he fell asleep on the couch, choking on his words. Kenma was sitting beside him still awake and he picked up his phone. He scrolled through his contacts until your name showed up. His hand hovered over the call button for a while. It was late in Japan, but for all he knew you were on the other side of the world.
He finally clicked the call button and held it up to his ear.
You didn’t answer.
He hung up and called again.
You didn’t answer again.
He was a little disappointed, but he didn’t have his hopes up in the first place. Kenma looked over to Kuroo. He was still mumbling to himself and hugging the couch pillow, his head burrowing itself deeper into the couch cushion.
Kenma opened up your text chat. (Y/N)... I feel like you’re there. Answer me, please.
He waited a bit, but you didn’t answer. He shook his head and flipped back to the game that he was playing before Kuroo came over.
Just as he was about to beat the final boss, a message popped down on his screen.
Are you with Kuroo?
He immediately switched back to his texting app and replied, Yes.
He waited.
Leave me alone Kenma...please
Wait, just tell me if you're safe....do you need anything? Kuroo’s really worried….
I’m safe. Bye Kenma.
Your new home was a lot smaller than the one you shared with Kuroo, but you loved it. This apartment didn’t have a single trace of him. In fact, you liked how small it was; it was cozy and you never felt alone.
Well, you weren’t alone and when you felt alone, you’d look down at your ever growing abdomen and pat it, whispering, “It’s only you and me now.”
Sharing the apartment with Kuroo for years helped you, financially, in a sense. For a little less than a year, Kuroo paid for the apartment in full until you pushed to pay for half of it. From that, living without paying for a while, meant more money in your account than you expected.
You didn’t go far. You brought the furthest train ticket that was available at four in the morning and went there. Absolutely nothing was planned. For the entirety of your train ride, you looked for places that you could stay. One of the passengers, on elderly lady, Mei, who was on your train seemed to take pity on you because when she offered you cookies, you burst out crying, and she offered to help you from that point on. She was on her way back home from her husband’s grave in Tokyo.
You had luck on your side. She told you that the apartment complex she lived in had an apartment opened for rent, and a few phone calls later, you had a roof over your head.
She helped you a lot too after she found out that you were pregnant. Once you moved in, Mei would check on you every now and then to make sure you were eating and getting enough rest. The entire complex was nice to you. They would bring you sweets every now and then and wave to you in the hallways.
After the first few months, you got into a good pattern. Luckily, your work from Tokyo allowed you to work from a laptop so most of your time was spent doing work.
At first, you were angry. Always angry. You couldn’t even turn to your stress baking ways because all you thought about was how Kuroo would walk in on you baking in the kitchen, laugh, take a bite of whatever you were making, and then talk to you about what was stressing you out that day.
Then you were sad until you couldn’t be anymore. The baby was coming soon and you had to prepare, physically and mentally.
You could raise a kid here, you thought.
You can do it.
9 Months later
Your doctor put you on bed rest, a literal order to sit and do nothing until your baby came.
Since then, Mei would check up on you more often. She would bring you food and help you when you need to get up for a little bit. Mostly, she just sat beside you and told you stories about how she met her husband and how he died (which always made you cry) until you fell asleep.
You woke up in pain. Your stomach was crampy and your bed was wet. You reached up and flicked on the light.
Blood soaked your sheets.
You started to panic and cry.
Slowly and carefully, you made your way to the front door, droplets of blood following your path. You opened the door and stumbled into the hallway, making your way a couple of doors down where Mei lived.
You banged on her door until she answered, blood still spilling between your thighs.
Her eyes were half closed and she was still in her pyjamas. “(Y/N)?”
“Something’s wrong,” you cried and fell to the floor.
Kuroo’s phone wouldn’t stop ringing. Today, he came fully dressed in his uniform, so he left his bag on the gym floor and went straight to practice. His phone was on vibrate, but whenever there was a silent moment in the gymnasium, everyone could hear the phone vibrating against the floor.
It was to the point where his coach gave him an annoyed look and called for a 10-minute break.
The call just ended when Kuroo got to his bag. He had seven missed calls from an unknown number. He looked through his phone for a bit to figure out if they left any messages and right when he was about to call them back, the mystery caller returned.
“Hello?” Kuroo said.
“Hello,” the caller replied. “Are you KurooTetsurou?”
“Yes?”
“I’m calling from Uji Hospital in Saitama. You are listed as (F/N) (L/N)’s emergency contact. She is currently in recovery.”
Kuroo heart dropped. He held the phone closer. “R-Recovery?”
“Yes,” the caller said. “A neighbour of Ms.(L/N)’s brought her in early this morning and she had an emergency c-section.”
Kuroo’s coach was calling him over but he couldn’t care less about volleyball. “What hospital was it?”
You woke up with your stomach hurting. Your eyes were blurry and your throat was raw. Looking down, you saw that your abdomen deflated a bit. You turned your head to your side and saw the Mei sitting beside you.
“What happened?”
Mei jumped up. “(Y/N)? You’re in the hospital. You gave me quite the scare this morning. You had to have a c-section, but your son is fine.”
Your eyes watered. “I have a son?”
“Yes,” she smiled. “It’s a boy. Hold on a second, I’m going to get a doctor and tell them you’re awake and then I’ll see if you can hold your son.”
You nodded. “Thank you.”
Your doctor returned without Mei and checked on you. You had to stay for a few days to make sure there were no infections or complications, but otherwise, you were in good health. Mei came back and stayed with you a bit and then had to leave, but assured you that a nurse was going to bring your baby down so that you could meet.
You don’t know how long you waited, but your eyes were getting tired. Once you heard a knock on your door, you sat up slowly, hoping that it was the nurse.
“Come in.”
Kuroo was standing at the door. He was in his volleyball uniform and he was breathing heavily.
“(Y/N).”
You frowned and leaned back into the bed. “How did you know where I am?”
Hesitantly, Kuroo took a step into the room and shut the door behind him. “I guess….I’m your emergency contact?”
“Oh,” you said. You forgot you changed it to him. After you left home, the emergency contact was your parents by default, but when you and Kuroo started getting serious, you changed it to him. You always meant to tell him, but you forgot.
Kuroo took another step closer to you. “I didn’t know I was your emergency contact...I was really surprised when I got the call, but I came as soon as I could...”
“I’m sorry.”
“No,” Kuroo rushed. “It’s okay.”
You were playing with the blanket, looking down. The two of you were nothing like you were months ago.
“I went back to the apartment, after that day,” Kuroo whispered. He was looking at the monitors that you were hooked up too, but his glaze slowly moved to you. “I went back a couple of hours after….but you were already gone.”
“Oh…”
“I’m not blaming you,” he said, taking another step closer. You always kind of hated how tall he was, especially knowing that you were laying in a bed. He was towering over you.“I just wanted to let you know that I’m sorry and that sounds like such a stupid word right now, but I am truly sorry.”
You looked up at him. His hair was longer than before and he looked a bit skinner. “What were you going to tell me? That day?”
Kuroo blinked. “I was going to tell you that I’m all in.”
“Kuroo…”
“Wait,” he said, holding out his hand. “Just listen to me okay? And then you can say whatever you want to say and I’ll accept it, or at least see if from your perspective, okay?”
You nodded slowly, relaxing your arms into the blanket.
“I am all in,” Kuroo started. “I want this. I want everything with this — with you. I’m sorry for what I said. It was a reaction. A bad reaction and I know that I can’t take it back, but I’ll do anything to make it up to you. I’m sorry (Y/N). I want the rest of my life to be with you and our baby if you’ll let me.”
You were silent and Kuroo was looking at you with hopeful eyes.
“I don’t know,” you whispered, shaking your head. “How do I know if 5 or 10 years down the line you’ll change your mind and history repeats itself? Kuroo, the moment I told you, you left me. I don’t….I don’t know if I can trust you anymore.”
“(Y/N), I -”
There was a knock on the door followed by it opening. A nurse walked in pushing a cart with an opened plexiglass top box and a baby in it, your baby. You watched as Kuroo stepped aside, his eyes glued in the baby as the nurse grew closer to you.
The nurse looked to Kuroo and then back at you. “Am I interrupting something? I can come back.”
“No,” you said quickly, tears blurring your vision. “No...I— can I hold him?”
“Him?” Kuroo whispered. There were tears in his eyes too, but he froze in place.
The nurse smiled at you. “Of course.”
The nurse carefully lifted the baby out of the plexiglass box and placed him in your arms. You held the baby close.
He was so small.
“Do you have a name yet?” The nurse asked.
“No...I um…”
You held your baby closer. He was sleeping or at least you thought he was sleeping. He was kind of opening and closing his eyes, but he remained still for the most part. He was perfect.
“Can I see him?” You looked up at Kuroo. He was still standing in the same place, but he looked as if he wanted to rush over.
You looked down. The baby was nestling into the crook of your arm. “Yeah, come over.”
“I’ll give you two some privacy,” The nurse said, and left the room.
Kuroo walked over to your bed and crouched down beside you, careful not to touch you. His eyes were wide. He held out his finger carefully and touched his son’s cheek. “He’s perfect.”
This was perfect. This moment.
“Kuroo?”
He looked up at you, his hand still on the baby’s cheek. “I don’t trust you still….and I can’t say it’ll be a perfect system, but our baby...he’s only a couple of hours old, but he already deserves the best. I want him to have everything and...everything includes you. I’m willing to try.”
Kuroo nodded his tears streaking down his. “Thank you.”
You smiled and looked back at your son. “What should we name him?”
Just a small note...I know absolutely nothing about pregnancy or Japan’s geography so just disregard any inconsistencies about that...
I hope you all enjoyed it!!! Like I said before, this is my first time writing something like this before, so I hope it was okay! I’ll try not to be late next time too...but I said that last time so….sorry about that!! But Bacon is the best so :(( (I know I am - Bacon)
*Bonus* I think they would’ve named their son after Mei’s late husband cause she helped so much...I didn’t write it but just know Mei helped a lot:(
Thank you for reading! -Kiwi
Posted: 03/07/2020
#haikyuu x reader#kuroo tetsurou#kuroo x reader#Haikyuu#x reader#oneshot#oneshots#haikyuu oneshots#haikyuu reader insert#reader insert#aus#haikyuu aus#fluff#haikyu#anime x reader#anime#manga x reader#manga
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Mysterylover watches Bleach Episodes 114-115
mysterylover123
1. Since calling him “Not L” is getting awkward I’ll refer to Ulquiorra by name from now on.
2. Hime angsts over not being strong enough to protect Tatsuki. Ichi is a good friend by her and tells her “no need” then does the flashy shonen power up thing. (I want these two to kick ass as hero douo so badly”
3. Also Damn Hime looks good in this scene. (and of course she gets told to run off by Ichi. Dammit I thought we were done benching her!)
4. Ulqui just basically stands on the side and analyzes how Ichi is Going Over 9000 and shit. Wow this really is the Saiyan arc. But with Ichigo’s HollowSona twist! OMG! It’s coming. Holy crap.
5. Hime gets smacked down, I’m assuming so that Ichigo can go “How dare you that’s my HIME” and flip out on these guys. (that’s the last Dragon Ball ref I swear)
6. Yoruichi and Urahara show up! Yay! Mentor duo. Go save them. And Yoru takes him on like the BAMF she is. Good, I was worried the ladies were gonna get benched again. (And WOW she really is tougher than our lead isn’t she? She takes NotNappa down in like 3 kicks.)
7. Ulqui just standing there with his hands in his pockets being utterly unflappable and cool. And Yoru goes and takes care of Hime. Aw! (And Ulqui is now fed up with his dumbass sidekick and like “screw this we’re outta here.” Oh yeah we like him.)
8. Oh Damn Ichi covered in bandages and looking just defeated. And clearly done with Teddy Bear Mineta’s shit. (as am I). We’re in the Ichigo Has Angst arc now aren’t we? (and aren’t you cold, dude? Lying around in your underwear while it’s raining outside?)��
9. ORIHIME IS SERIOUSLY INJURED?! Holy crap. Her Harem is worried about her. Tatsuki is brooding. Ichigo is worried about her and tries to make her feel better. Hime tried to make him feel better but he’s mad at himself for not protecting them. I’m kinda impressed that he’s not immediately running off and doing something stupid in response to this. The typical Shonen protagonist schtick is not gonna cut it here.
10. RENJI IS HERE RENJI IS HERE RENJI IS HERE HOLY CRAP YAS YAS YAS YAS. And the Boob redhead + Discount Saitama + Hitsu + Pretty one. YAY reunions. AND SPEAKING OF REUNIONS RUKIA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
11. And she immediately kicks Ichi in the face while Renji holds him. The couple that fights together...beats Ichigo up together apparently. Also this Soul Reaper Squad is hilarious.
12. LOL Ruki riding on Ichi’s back like he’s a horse or a bike or something. And her Hollow Radar locates one immediately. Which instantly activates Ichi’s HollowSona. I get the feeling that Ichi’s just gonna have to lean into it from now on.
13. Hm, Rukia is doing a good job helping Ichi get over his Hollow Angst. Over great music. BROTP at the very least. I think this may be the first time I’ve really gotten some inkling of why the fandom is into these two as a ship rather than just as friends. Like, cause Ichi was so down and she effortlessly got him out of it.
14. RUKIA AND ORIHIME MEET UP AGAIN TOO. Oh and these two are also flirting like crazy. Damn everyone in this gang has such great chemistry.
15. Redhead girl’s boob shirt is really distracting. And they keep having camera closeups on them just to remind you. We have a Big Boob girl in the cast now, just in case you forgot.
16. OMG and of course their conversation sounds like they’re talking about his dick, freaking out Ichigo’s dad and sister. And wow Karin is so freaking gay, the way she’s talking about Tatsuki and Orihime.
17. RENJI’S ALSO HERE. Along with the gang, who somehow snuck into Ichigo’s ceiling. Why did Ruki take a normal route and the others didn’t.
18. Renji and Ruki sit on the bed to give exposition together of course. “I was closer to Rukia than most” gee you don’t say Rukia’s future husband?
19. So the Arrancar are gonna attack with really dangerous hollows and their leader is Glasses douche. Dammit why couldn’t Ulqui be their leader? He’s so much cooler (so far at least). And the top powerful hollows are OP apparently so we should have some cool battles coming up.
20. Ooh final scene Ulqui and NotNappa meeting up with a bunch of shadowy figures and Glasses Douche. (I so hope Ulqui gets a klingon promotion this arc.) And Glasses Douche has abandoned his glasses so I guess I have to call him by his name now dammit.
#Bleach#mysterylover watches bleach#orihime inoue#ichigo kurosaki#ulquiorra cifer#tatsuki#urahara kisuke#yoruichi shihouin#rukia kuchiki#renji abarai#rukia's back!#along with all her ships#renruki#ichiruki#rukihime#missed her#arrancar arc#let's go
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Date With The Devil
Happy Birthday Cain!!! @kaincuro
I know I’ve already told you this, but I’m so glad our paths crossed. Ily b💛Hope this year brings you everything you deserve and more.
As a fellow member of the Mumensai gang, I thought I’d write some Villain!Saitama for you. But soft.
Mumen heard Saitama before he saw him.
“We really gotta stop meeting like this, Rider.”
He let out a squeak and whipped around, nearly brushing noses with Saitama. He recoiled, and in his haste to put space between the two of them, he stumbled, falling back.
Mumen felt a strong arm wrap around his waist and a gloved hand intertwine with his own as Saitama dipped him low to the ground.
Saitama grinned. “Falling for me already?”
Mumen shoved back Saitama’s face with his free hand, unimpressed. “Let me go, Saitama.”
The villain complied, helping Mumen to his feet.
He glared at Saitama—who looked utterly unremorseful—and made his way over to Justice on the bike rack, trailed by the man who was becoming a colossal pain in his—
Saitama nudged him. “Doing your daily rounds?”
“I don’t see how it’s any of your business.” Mumen got onto his bike.
The villain cocked his head and crossed his arms over his chest. “Well, you’re a hero, I’m a villain. Shouldn’t you be fighting me?”
Mumen looked over his shoulder. “Do you plan on hurting anyone?”
“Not particularly—”
He cut Saitama off. “Then what you’re doing is none of my business.”
Mumen kicked up his kickstand.
“But—”
Mumen shifted his weight onto his right foot. “All that’s going to happen if I try and fight you is you dodge my attacks, make snarky comments, then leave once you get bored. Why bother if it’s not helping anyone?”
“Woah, you’re testy today,” Saitama remarked. “Everything alright?”
He tried to ignore the thrill that ran up his spine at the note of concern in Saitama’s voice.
It wasn’t like he didn’t know Saitama was interested in him. The other heroes might call him oblivious, but even he could tell that Saitama was flirting with him.
Seriously, who dips people out of the blue these days?
But this was different.
“I’m not in the mood to end up in the hospital,” Mumen replied, his tone clipped. “I’m having a good week. And aren’t you a S-Class criminal? I’m only a C-Class hero.”
“You would be B-Class if you’d accept the Hero Association’s offer and rank up,” Saitama pointed out.
Mumen glared at him.
Saitama put his hands in front of him in surrender. “Ok, yeah, maybe that’s still not the best matchup for an S-Class criminal. But when has a bad matchup ever stopped you?”
“When the criminal isn’t threatening anything other than my sanity.”
“Ouch,” Saitama said, placing his hand over his chest. “I’m kinda hurt.”
“Join the club,” Mumen said, putting his left foot on the pedal.
He started to push off.
“You know I’d never hurt you, right?”
Mumen put his foot back down, and gave Saitama a look. “Is that what got you your reputation? Not hurting people?”
“Satoru.”
Hearing that made him stop.
He looked up at the villain.
“I’m serious,” Saitama said. “I would never hurt you.”
Mumen opened his mouth to make a snappy retort, but the words died on his lips when he saw Saitama’s face.
For once, his face wasn’t split by a grin, or completely void of emotion. Instead, he crinkled his brow, as if he was concerned.
He almost looked earnest.
Mumen felt his face warm. “I’m not falling for your mind games, Saitama.”
“Let me prove it to you,” he replied. “There’s a coffee shop just up the street, my roommate says it’s solid. Wanna check it out and talk? My treat.”
The offer made him hesitate.
If there was one thing he knew about Saitama, it was that the villain was frugal before all else. If he was offering to pay for Mumen’s drink—
“Think of it this way,” Saitama said, interrupting Mumen’s train of thought. “By getting something to drink with me, you’re keeping me off the streets and preventing me from causing more trouble. Hero work isn’t all punching and saving kittens you know.
He grinned. “Sometimes it’s having a drink with your friendly local villain.”
Mumen resisted the urge to roll his eyes.
But Saitama had a point. Time spent with him was time spent keeping tabs of a potentially dangerous criminal.
“I take my lunch in an hour,” Mumen said, ignoring how Saitama lit up. “I’ll be there right at 1pm. I’ll wait for five minutes, but if you don’t show up, I’m leaving.”
Saitama nodded so violently Mumen worried his head would pop off. “Yeah, I’ll be there,” he said. “The shop is called—ah crap, where did Genos put that coupon—” he retrieved a coupon from his pocket. “—the shop is called Usegi’s Coffee and Tea.”
Mumen sighed. “Taking me there to use a coupon?”
“What? Oh, no, this one’s expired,” Saitama replied. He flipped it over to reveal that the back had a grocery list written on it. “I just don’t like wasting paper.”
Mumen nodded. “Fine. Usegi’s. 1pm. And please—” he looked Saitama up and down, “—wear something other than your costume.”
He took off before he could hear Saitama’s reply.
---
Mumen was at the coffee shop before 1pm.
He’d never been to one of these types of coffee shops before: the menu board didn’t have any drinks on it he recognized.
If Mumen knew Saitama—and he did, probably better than he should—he knew the villain wouldn’t let him live down not knowing what to order.
He peeked over at the register. There wasn’t a line.
Mumen approached the counter.
The girl behind the counter smiled. “Hi, welcome to Usegi’s, what can I get started for you?”
She paused, noticing Mumen’s distressed look. “Is this your first time here?” she asked.
When he nodded, she smiled. “The menu’s a bit overwhelming. Let me find one with descriptions and break it down for you.”
She pulled out a paper menu. “Are you looking for coffee, tea, a non-caffeinated beverage or some food?”
“I’d like a green tea, but I’m meeting someone and I don’t know what he’ll want.”
The girl nodded. “Alright, we’ll look over the whole menu then.”
Mumen felt a warm hand on his shoulder, and it was all he could do not to not jump out of his skin.
He turned around to glare at the hand’s owner.
“Hey, nice sweater,” Saitama said with a lopsided smile. “Looks good on you.”
Mumen’s face flushed. “Thanks, you—you look nice too.”
He was lying—well, kind of.
Saitama had changed into a neon green button up shirt and denim shorts.
Mumen sighed.
He was lucky he was cute.
Wait—
“I’m guessing this is who you were waiting on?” the girl asked, effectively disrupting his train of thought.
Mumen nodded.
She turned to Saitama. “Great! Do you know what you want to order?”
Saitama scratched his head. “Uh yeah, can I get a medium Ume Dragon please?”
The girl grabbed a pen. “Want that hot or iced?”
“Iced please.”
She picked up a cup, wrote his order down, then placed it on the counter.
She looked at Mumen. “Are you ready to order too?”
“Uh—”
The girl pointed to the paper menu.
Mumen followed her finger.
“I’ll try a medium iced Mean Green,” he said, reading the name off the menu.
“Anything else?”
Saitama looked at Mumen, who shook his head.
“Okay, let me ring you up and I’ll have your drinks right out.”
Saitama nudged Mumen. “Wanna go find us a table?”
Mumen nodded.
He scanned the room.
Most of the tables were taken, filled with students on their laptops with their earbuds in. But there was one open table over by the window, and he made his way over to it.
Once there, he found his mind wandering back to his earlier thought.
Did he really think a villain was cute?
Yes.
Mumen sighed.
Well. That complicates things.
“Our drinks will be ready in a minute,” Saitama said, sliding into the other seat. “So, you actually showed up.”
“I told you I’d be here at 1pm,” Mumen replied.
“But it’s not one yet,” Saitama pointed out. “You’re early.”
“I got here faster than I thought I would.” He paused. “Wait, you’re early too!”
Saitama turned his head to look out the window, but not before Mumen saw the dusting of red on his cheeks. “I wanted to make a good first impression,” he said.
“Technically, my first impression of you was you smacking Tank Top Tiger into a building,” Mumen pointed out.
“He attacked me first!” Saitama said, his voice rising in pitch. “It’s not like I was beating up an old lady on the street or anything.”
Mumen scrunched up his face. “Saitama, not attacking old women isn’t a noteworthy achievement. It’s just an expectation.”
“I know that! I’m just saying I was defending myself. But I meant this is my first time making a real first impression on you,” he said, scratching his neck. “You know, one where we’re just two normal people, not a hero and a villain.”
Mumen softened. “Well, we wouldn’t have to do a do-over if you didn’t decide to be a villain,” he said, but there was no venom behind his words.
Saitama shrugged. “Sure, but then I wouldn’t have met you.”
Mumen sputtered, and opted to change the subject. “So, how is it a S-Class criminal is able to walk around in public without being attacked by heroes?”
“I think people only recognize me when I’ve got the suit on,” Saitama replied. “I’ll get reported sometimes in normal clothes, but people remember the suit more than my face.”
Mumen tilted his head. “So why put on the suit at all then?”
“I get bored,” Saitama said. “The suit puts a target on my back. Gives me something fun to do. But I usually wait till I get to City Z’s ghost town to put it on to avoid regular people.”
“You try to avoid hurting regular people?”
“Well, yeah,” Saitama said. “I’m a jerk, not a monster.”
“I’ve got an Ume Dragon and a Mean Green for Saitama!”
Saitama hopped to his feet. “I’ll get it.”
Mumen stood. “No, I’ll coming too. I don’t trust you not to drink mine.”
“Wow, rude. But fine.”
The two walked over to the counter. Saitama picked up his drink, then grabbed Mumen’s drink and passed it to him along with a straw.
The girl working walked back to the register. “Enjoy your date, you two.”
“Thank you, we will,” Saitama said, cutting off Mumen’s protests.
Mumen took a sip of his drink. Luckily, the employee’s subtle recommendation was tasty. A little sweet, but the green tea and apple were a good combination.
The two sat back down.
“A date?” Mumen repeated. “Is that what this is?”
“Are you okay with that?” Saitama asked.
Mumen took another sip of his drink.
Was he okay with that?
He swallowed. “Yeah,” he said. “I am.”
Saitama beamed. “Good.”
“It might make things complicated but—I mean, it’s not like I think you’re a bad guy.”
Saitama’s grin grew even wider. “Really? You don’t think I’m a bad guy?”
Mumen groaned. “I’m gonna regret that, aren’t I?”
Saitama leaned forward. “Tell you what: I’ll trade a kiss for a day of do-gooding,” he said, wrapping his grin around his straw.
Mumen raised an eyebrow. “You need incentives to not be bad? Maybe I was wrong.”
“No, but incentives never hurt,” Saitama replied, biting his straw.
He reached across the table, placing his hand on top of Mumen’s.
“Who knows, maybe I’ll trade in my villain cap for a hero one.”
Mumen did his best to focus on anything other than the callused thumb tracing circles over the back of his hand.
Some part of his mind registered this was the first time he’d seen Saitama not wearing gloves.
Before he could think, he leaned across the table and planted a kiss on Saitama’s cheek.
Saitama’s face turned bright red, the color migrating to his ears and up his scalp. “Uh.”
Mumen’s heart jumped to his throat. “Oh spirits, you were obviously joking—I’m so sorry, I shouldn’t have—”
“I meant a kiss on the lips, but I guess that’ll cover the rest of the day,” Saitama said, cutting him off.
Mumen shoved his shoulder. “Feel lucky that you got a kiss at all.”
“I do feel lucky,” Saitama replied, the grin returning to his face. “Maybe even more so because of how red you are. You look really cute flustered.”
Mumen covered his face with his hands. “You’re such a punk.”
Saitama hummed. “Yeah, but you kind of like that about me, don’t you? I’m the loveable rogue.”
He sobered.
“We might have to cut this short, Mumen.”
He gestured towards the park.
Death Gatling was on the move, and headed towards the coffee shop.
Mumen’s eyes went wide. “We need to get you out of here,” he said.
“No, we need to get you out of here,” Saitama replied. “You can’t be seen out with me.”
“You can’t fight him right now, there are too many civilians around,” Mumen hissed.
Saitama shook his head. “I wasn’t going to fight, I was going to run the opposite direction.”
“Mumen Rider!”
The two turned towards the sound of the voice.
The girl behind the counter beckoned to them. “Come on, there’s not much time.”
They made their way over.
She opened the half door and herded them through the kitchen. “The door in the back leads to an alleyway. Stay away from the main streets.”
Saitama furrowed his brow. “Why are you helping us?”
“Because Mumen Rider seems to like you, and I trust his judgement,” she replied.
She unlocked the door. “I’m going to lock this behind you,” she said. “Now go. We didn’t see anything.”
Mumen hesitated. “What about those students?” he asked, stepping outside.
“None of them are big ‘authority figures’ people. They won’t talk,” she said. She started to close the door.
Mumen caught her wrist. “Thank you.”
The girl nodded, and closed the door behind them.
Saitama looked at Mumen. “We’ll probably be faster if you let me carry you,” he said.
Mumen sighed, and nodded.
Saitama picked Mumen up, holding his back and beneath his knees.
And he took off.
Mumen’s heart caught in his throat again, but for an entirely different reason.
Moving this fast, where his surroundings turned to a blur and the wind roared in his ears…
It was exhilarating.
After a minute or two, Saitama slowed, placing Mumen back on his feet in another alleyway.
Mumen coaxed his heart back down into his chest, where it continued to pound as if he’d been the one running while carrying someone.
“Well,” Saitama said, a lopsided smile on his face. “That was fun.”
Mumen grabbed Saitama by the collar and yanked him down, smashing their lips together.
He heard Saitama make a surprised, “Eep!” before relaxing, bringing his hands up to cup Mumen’s face.
He didn’t know why he kissed Saitama.
Maybe it was the adrenaline.
Maybe it was just him being impulsive.
Maybe it was the fact Saitama looked so damn good, and that he’d maybe wanted to kiss him for a while now.
Whatever it was, he ran with it.
Without breaking the kiss, Mumen pinned him to the wall, reveling in the feeling of caging in someone who could swat him aside without any effort.
Saitama gasped as Mumen’s lips found his neck, the hero kissing and nibbling his way down the exposed skin.
He could feel Saitama’s pulse pounding against his lips.
Mumen pulled him into another kiss.
After a moment, Saitama broke the kiss. “At this rate, I might have to become a hero full time,” he rasped
Mumen jolted. “Seriously?”
Saitama nodded. “I told you. I play villain because I’m bored. But this—” he caught Mumen’s chin with his hand, “—this is the opposite of boring.”
“Are you being serious? You’d give up being a villain?”
Saitama’s eyes crinkled. “I don’t know, will you go on a second date with me?”
Mumen gave him a peck on the lips. “Of course.” He pulled back a bit. “We just have to figure out how to get the Hero Association to stop sending people after you.”
“We can figure that out later,” Saitama said, sliding out from under Mumen. “For now we just have to focus on finding me a place to lay low until I can get back to my apartment.”
Mumen grinned. “I think I know a place.”
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OPM Chapter 125 Transcript
As published online 10 Jan 2020
Chapter #: 125
Update #: 167
Translator: hdx514
Cover Page
TEXT: He continues marching forward, taking another step.
CHAPTER 125: Sit Down
Page 1
BANG AND BOMB: Kyaa
Page 2
TEXT: Thud
TEXT: Thud
FUBUKI: Eh……whaaaat!!!?
FUBUKI: It’s defeated……!!?
FUBUKI: Even though I heard he was really strong
BANG AND BOMB: Hey
TEXT: Clap
FUBUKI: But there should be a limit to these things…S-Class rank 3, Silver Fang……!!!
Page 3
FUBUKI: Speaking of!!
FUBUKI: Who is this older brother?
FUBUKI: Just who on earth is he??
FUBUKI: He’s not even a hero, right?
FUBUKI: Still, his strength rivals that of Silver Fang’s---
FUBUKI: Did I just unearth an amazing talent by chance…!!?
FUBUKI: I can’t let this one get away!!
FUBUKI: He needs to be in the Fubuki Group at all cost!!
Page 4
FUBUKI: Um…Mr. Bomb, was it?
BOMB: Hm?
FUBUKI: Ehm
FUBUKI: Magnificent job!
FUBUKI: I’m truly impressed!
BOMB: Likewise, young lady
FUBUKI: Oh, there’s one thing I forgot to tell you…
Page 5
FUBUKI: The special bonus for joining the Fubuki Group
FUBUKI: It’s a 3kg special beef set at the moment…
BOMB: It’s still kicking
BOMB: Just how tough is this dog
BANG: What a troublesome doggy, we can't progress further
BANG: Just “sit down” and behave!
Page 6
BANG: !?
BOMB: ……it actually sat down…?
BANG: Alright, let’s hurry on forward
BOMB: That was our special secret joined technique, you’d think it would at least have some effect...my confidence just got crushed again after facing that giant centipede…
BANG: What’s the matter?
FUBUKI: My…my back gave out…
Page 7
TATSUMAKI: This “power”…
TATSUMAKI: Is Fubuki here…!?
TATSUMAKI: I clearly told them she absolutely cannot be allowed to get involved
TATSUMAKI: I’ll make sure to give Sekingar a piece of my mind later
Page 8
SAITAMA: Woo---!!
FLASH: Hey…how long before we arrive at Monster King’s place!?
MONSTER: E..eh! About 10 minutes!
FLASH: Is it time for the ultimate final battle.......
Page 9
SAITAMA: I had no idea there’s so much stuff going on beneath my home…
SAITAMA: Goddamn it, I wouldn’t be so bored had I known this earlier
FLASH: Simmer down
FLASH: If you fall into a trap, I will leave you behind
SAITAMA: I’m totally focused okay!
FLASH: This is why amateurs are…
SAITAMA: Huh? Up till now, I’ve had…
Page 10
SAITAMA: My fair share of…
Page 11
SAITAMA: Ooo
SAITAMA: Woooaah
TEXT: Click
SAITAMA: Wooooo!!!
FLASH: Be quiet will you
Page 12
MONSTER: Just you wait…
MONSTER: I’ll drop this whole cart down the valley at the switching point up ahead
MONSTER: Taking an S-Class hero into the afterlife is the greatest underdog victory ever!
TEXT ON SAITAMA: Bonus
MONSTER: Ooo~~that’s quite the drop
MONSTER: ……
MONSTER: ……
MONSTER: Maybe……
MONSTER: Maybe I’ll wait little longer for another opportunity…
END
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Audio
Shonen Jump Rap Cypher by Rustage
Lyrics below the cut
If anyone wants to break down some lines that you think not everyone will get, please feel free!
Monkey D. Luffy- One Piece (Performed by Rustage)
Starting with the number one, hey
How’d a pirate get this long, hey
‘Cause I eat the gum-gum, see them run run
when I hit that gun, hey
Sailin’ I’m taking no breaks when my crew’s on the move as we pillage the grand line
Looting the treasure we can find
I’m blowing up like a landmine
Going gear second, I reckon that I’m a weapon
I’m wrecking up those who threaten in messing with my own brethren
Stay reppin’ look where I’m headin’
No question the Yonkos sweatin’
I’m bettin’ in words I’m yellin’
I’m the king and there’s no forgettin’, UH
Gon Freecss- Hunter x Hunter (Performed by Fabvl)
I’ll jump the competition, really there’s no contest
Channeled future Nen and most of y’all ain’t even bomb yet
It’s nonsense
Pro exams completed as a child
Hisoka, I think these clowns are living in denial
So don’t make me power up, I’ll call the thunder at my right hand
If you want the strongest Shonen, then you called the right man
They might stan
Treat you all like Pitou, it won’t take long
Name is Gon and this time, I’mma make sure that you stay gone
Naruto Uzumaki- Naruto (Performed by None Like Joshua)
Oh, better believe it’s Naruto
Who’s the best hero? All of you know
My legacy is happening, I got a type of running named after me
while you’re slow
Can’t keep up with my chakra flow
Except Hinata, I’m her Ho
Kage
All I did was call her and I told her to come over ‘cause my parents are not home
Out of these ninjas, you can watch my dub
Even all my filler is so far above
When it comes to Boruto, why y’all givin’ up
like I did with simpin’ on Sakura?
Killer B’s rapping, but I get the encore
With the power that I bring, I don’t really want yours
‘Cause I came from the swing, everybody shunned more
Now you’re looking at the king of this Jump Force
Yami Yugi- Yu-Gi-Oh! (Performed by Connor Quest!)
I’mma master, you be
practice newbies
That’s a doozy
for Yami Yugi
Puzzle did something like a hadron tunnel
‘cause now I got Atem through me
Champ of the match see fans fawn, no matter what hand’s drawn
I’m kicking up dust, metal tanks in land form
When we d-d-d-d-duel there’s sandstorms
Cards are flippin’ I need an answer quick
and I might find my Dark Magician
If I wish, and believe hard enough in the heart that’s in ‘em
(Heart of the cards)
I see Seto’s fear
Pull the fifth part of Exodia
Guess it’s all came to a head, so clear
that your deck’s gonna get X’d, oh dear!
Asta- Black Clover (Performed by Eddie Rath)
Welcome to the magic
It’s a tale that’s tragic
Filled with a pain that’s harder than plastic
especially when you discover you don’t have it
When I started I was less than amazing
But now that I’ve been chosen by the Grimoir, I’m rising to the occasion in a blazing flame of
Magic
Ain’t no Hocus Pocus and Abracadabra
Not a wizard you joke with
This is not Gandalf the Grey, but you shall not pass hopeless
Better be ferocious
Was the poorest orphan living in darkness
but now that I’m focused, I be thanking all my hardships
Ichigo Kurosaki- Bleach (Performed by IBDL)
Uh, hittin’ back with that Bankai
Got that power like I came out of the Dangai
Pops passed the torch; now I’m the fam’s Don guy
Think you Aizen, but you lookin’ like that Don guy
Y’all like Soifon, your raps barely sting
My bars are Getsuga Tensho, got that masterful swing
They say, it ain’t over til the fat lady sings
But you’ll know it’s really over when that black lady sings
Koro-sensei- Assassination Classrom (Performed by CDawgVA)
Mach speed
Blow up the moon and now I’m making these children write essays
Comin with tentacles teach you a lesson in why you don’t mess with the sensei
I amaze
Used to be the Reaper, now I run this class
I can turn a loser to assassin, do it real fast
Light Yagami- Death Note (Performed by Zach Boucher)
I think I’ve been out of my head
Gift was given, made some poor decisions, that I wish I didn’t, but I’d do it again
Feeling different, I was on a mission to achieve my vision with a page and a pen
Sit and listen to the words I’ve written
I ain’t even finished ‘til I see that they’re dead
Don’t even try to pretend
There’s no malicious intent
Stay in my thoughts, stick to the morals I’ve got,
and kill everyone who is not
Just never get caught, ‘til every criminal rots
They’ll consider me as a god
At whatever cost, that’s how I excel
Cannot be stopped, even if I fell
I’m taking them off if you couldn’t tell
I gave up a lot to give you this L
Shoyo Hinata- Haikyuu!! (Performed by Shwabadi)
Yah, here comes Hinata
When I’m on the court the enemy has got their guard up
Never gonna fall off, bet I’m gonna pop off
Way short, but I’m packing punches like a sawnoff
Hot like a sauna, this ball of fire don’t know nada
but I’m gonna chase desire to go farther
every jump will take me higher
They put walls up, so I had to learn to fly
Putting up points, spiking it, or clearing the way
Best decoy, got a little something to say
to anyone that doubts that I’m here to stay
Only got one goal, that’s to play the game
Underestimated, I’m the ace, you just wait
when I spike it past the net, you might take it to the face
Izuku “Deku” Midoriya- My Hero Academia (Performed by Divide Music)
Coming in with 100% of me
I got you all trembling
Oh just with a flick of a finger
put you back where you’re supposed to be
I’m not, holding back
I got you so calculated. I’m
one step ahead, One for All gon’ be demonstrated
Get it? Got it? Good.
Nothing better and you should know
Started at the bottom
but I made it to the top so
Step aside, I’m climbing to great heights
with All-Might by my side
Reppin’ U.A. with pride, oh
Yusuke Urameshi- Yu Yu Hakusho (Performed by GameBoyJones)
Giving you the finger, Spirit Gun
Send you off with Botan, then you done
Hit you with the stick, and I didn’t need a grip when I’m pulling from the hip, then click!
Because I’m, locked loaded, the clip is ready to go
Got a, shotgun in my hand that’s ‘bout to blow
Cause I’m hittin’ you quick fast
givin’ you whiplash
wearing these Spirit Cuffs
You could be human or demon, cause honestly, I just don’t give a fuck
If you’re looking for the best, just know there’s no other
‘cause I’m flexing out here like I’m the youngest Toguro brother
Gintoki Sakata- Gintama (Perfomed by Shao Dao)
They call me, Gintoki, slim not stocky
Lemme Shonen Jump on your leg and your body
Odd Job Gin, don’t mess with my possee
If you touch my hair, then you will be sorry
Ne, boge (Hey, bloke)
Nanikore, uruseena (what is this? Not good.)
Cause you’re way too sloppy
Got a silver soul, Shiroyasha
Swing my sword and Amanto scatter
Gintama, not Kintama
Tell Shinpachi we need money
If Kagura or Katsura bring more trouble, we keep running
Pay rent? That’s a waste of time
That weather girl, I will make her mine
You can beat me up and that’s fair and fine
But if you hurt my friends, then prepare to die
Tanjiro Kamado- Demon Slayer (Performed by DizzyEight)
Look, slayin’ demons that’s what we do
If you filled with evil, then my blade is highly lethal
If you comin’ at my people, pray to god I never meet you
Ever mess with Nez, you KO’d when I see you
I’ve grown stronger from that fateful day they found me
I trained hard to hone the skill, the progression so astounding
My style like breathing water, that mean you can never drown me
Whirlpool, that mean I’m slicin’ everything around me
Emma- The Promised Neverland (Performed by FrivolousShara)
E-M-M-A 63194
Listen to what I’ve gotta say
The others walked, seems now we’ve gotta run away
Don’t you talk, adults are the enemy
You can break every bone in my body, I won’t falter
and if the plan fails, the idea simply alters
Ah, these demons scheming, but they ain’t the only monsters
Our combined IQ breaks the safe, strength in numbers
Now we’ve woken from the slumber
Never ending perfect Summers
Across the farm, you can’t help but wonder
Soma Yukihira- Food Wars! (Performed by DiggzDaProphecy)
See I’m the anime Raekwon
The chef baby, stay calm
You can’t stand the heat
Stay out the kitchen, get a day job
Word, and the finale’s superb
I take a sec, put on my band, an’ I’ll be happy to serve, uh
So ma, tell me what you like and I can hook it up
Ya boy’s got them recipes the best couldn’t cook it up
And she gon’ bust from the taste of my meat
Chef, boy are these boys always cookin’ up heat
Jotaro Kujo- Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure (Performed by Dreaded Yasuke)
It’s my go, they call me Jotaro
Don’t get me mad, I’mma go fat only with jabs you go through silos
Got that drip from Cairo, girls will simp my silhouette
I know think it’s a typo fighting with a platinum psycho
None of y’all is a threat
What you gotta say in your breath
Better speak with a bigger chest
Now you lyin’ down with my pet,
while Iggy piss on your neck
All types of disrespect, what you expect?
Go against a vet, better get your techs
wanna get swept through the complex,
now who is next?
Bobobo- Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo (Performed by BassedOlaf w/ ThighHighSenpai)
Bobobo making the foes stare
Call me the master of nose hair
Look at the hair on the heads of these anime characters,
brother, it’s no fair
But I’m better than these guys, don’t you understand?
I came second place at screaming face-to-face with desk fans
Afro is full of surprises, look at my power’s immense
Leaving beauty screaming-
(Bobobo, that makes no sense!)
Hunting hair hunters, Saitama, I’m coming for you
Don Patch a better Super Saiyan God than Goku
Son Goku- Dragon Ball (Performed by DaddyPhatSnaps)
Oh they went and called Kakarot
had to be danger
Leave em flat-footed like they in the gravity chamber
I’m just looking for a challenge, can you battle me stranger?
Shonen legend in the saddle and the power is major
Level up on the track, flow Ultra Instinct
Bye bye bye fusion dance is always in sync
Wink
And they wonder why I’m last on the song
‘Cause when all of y’all were talking
I just formed a Spirit Bomb
#Shonen Jump#Rap#hip-hop#hip-hop lyrics#One Piece#Hunter x Hunter#Naruto#Yu-Gi-Oh#Black Clover#Bleach#Assassination Classroom#Death Note#Haikyuu!!#My Hero Academia#Boku no Hero Academia#MHA#BNHA#Yu Yu Hakusho#YYH#Gintama#Demon Slayer#Kimetsu no Yaiba#KNY#The Promised Neverland#TPN#Food Wars!#Shokugeki no Soma#SnS#Jojo's Bizarre Adventure#JJBA
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can’t keep my hands (off you).
Anime/Manga: One Punch Man
Pairing: Garou/fem!Reader
Additional pairing/characters: platonic Metal Bat/fem!Reader, Zenko, mentions of other heroes such as Saitama, Watchdog Man, etc.
Genre: Romance, comedy
Warning: Absolute silliness. Language – Garou and reader both ate rainbows for breakfast. Dumbassery. Teeth-rotting fluff, maybe? Reader is hella strong like Saitama. Half-assed spice because you’re good at cockblocking Garou despite being low-key thirsty for him. And LOTS of dumbassery from the reader, most probably.
Additional tag: Dream-based fic, canon-divergent, Garou is horny af
A/N: This is supposed to be a lengthy one-shot, but I’m a dumbass who can’t keep my word so the supposedly one-shot isn’t a one shot anymore. Now I have to worry how I should properly divide all those parts (I mean, they’re already divided, but--) 😅
Establishing yourself in their world.
Summary:
Your life had its general ups and downs, pros and cons, the good and the bad.
You were admittedly a coward and afraid of being targeted by people for it. Following the advice of your (best) friend you trained hard, like, FUCKING hard, and now you’re blessedly, utterly strong you can take down enemies with just one hit. A good thing, really. Can’t let any bad guy harass you or something.
But-
You were probably cursed with the biggest, baddest of luck. Not only were monsters chasing you, suddenly there was this fucking hot bastard weirdo who kept on calling himself the Hero Hunter.
“I’m not a hero, goddamn it!”
iii. and iv. | v. | [more to be added]
“i can’t keep my
hands
off...!”
- can’t keep my hands off you/simple plan
i.
If anyone who knew you could pick a single word to describe you, it had to be coward.
But it wasn’t like you could blame them, the choice was easily justifiable with how you always seemed to cower whenever a threat - even the smallest - popped out to inconvenience you and disturb the hopefully peaceful life you wanted to live.
You though that having a hero as your best friend would be enough to keep you safe. But considering his busy schedule, you were left with no choice but to fend for yourself.
“You just gotta get strong, ya know!” Badd (aka the one and only Metal Bat) told you countless of times whenever you would run to him, either telling him that some creepy guy was harassing you or a monster was chasing you.
It might have been the ‘what the fuck are you on about?’ look you had given him that day that left you sporting red, aching cheeks for the remainder of the afternoon, Badd having pinched and squished them - so hard you actually cried - for having the gall to non-verbally question him.
Fearing for the safety of your cheeks (Badd might pull your ears next, something you couldn’t afford to experience), you followed his advice.
Day after day you would lift weights, do some core exercises. You even went as far as to following some guy in a blue tracksuit’s training regime (he saw you training, you asked him on a whim on how to be strong, he nonchalantly answered your question) which consisted of doing a hundred push-ups, sit-ups, squats, and a 10-kilometer run every day. It was gruelling enough, and most of the times you would only find yourself waking up to Zenko’s glare, the girl telling you how Badd found you unconscious somewhere around the city.
“Are you trying to kill yourself?” Badd asked you one day, brows pinched with concern when you woke up in his arms.
Huh. You must’ve passed out again while working out.
“You told me to get strong, stupiiiiiiid,” you whined pathetically, hitting him on the face and chest with a trembling hand.
The recently minted S-Class hero snorted at your weak and pathetic display of attempted violence. “Yeah, I did. But I didn’t tell ya to train ‘til you’re on death’s door.”
You threw your head backwards dramatically, exposing your neck and making Badd drop you when he got an eyeful of the tops of your sports bra.
“Ow! Bat, what the heck!?”
“I can see your- y-your- ew! I need to wash my fuckin’ eyeballs! And why are you even wearing those in the first place when you don’t have any boobs?”
“I will fucking murder you in your sleep, Badd!”
You ended up in his arms again, only because you fainted once more due to exhaustion.
But you continued with your training nonetheless, slowly building up both stamina and strength to the point where you could finally make it home and collapse on your own bed after a long day of hard work.
Your parents were worried at how far you were pushing yourself, but they never stopped you when – for the first time in your life – you insisted that you had to do this for your own betterment. Never had they seen you so determined, your eyes still filled with fear but were now mixed with the fires of fortitude, and the way you settled the discussion made them relent. But that didn’t mean that they would stop worrying for you, often pleading for Badd to look after you whenever he could. Your parents might always be busy and far from home most of the times due to their jobs, but you (Badd and Zenko included) were always in their heart and mind.
For a year and a half, your training had been one of your constants.
You bawled like a kid the first time you punched some weird mushroom monster into oblivion - its legs the only evident of its existence after that one hit - because finally, your hellish (to you, anyway) training finally paid off!
Badd had hugged you and cried a little, telling you how proud he was of your achievement and how you could finally be strong enough to look more effectively after yourself. Being an S-Class had demanded more time from him and you couldn’t exactly come running to him every time you find yourself in a pinch. Aside from being a hero, his greatest priority was his precious little sister, and you would never have the heart to take away Zenko’s onii-chan from her.
“So, [Name]. Wanna be a pro-hero?” Badd asked you one night when you were out eating ramen with him and Zenko. “You’re pretty strong now, and you can take on monsters on your own. Man, I haven’t even seen you pummel one, now that I mentioned it!” he added, looking at you excitedly.
Your ears turned red from embarrassment at being praised. “I’m really not... at least not on your level. The monsters I meet by accident were all weak, thank god for that,” you replied. You returned his gaze, eyes narrow, and clicked your chopsticks at him. “And nope, I don’t wanna. Why would I want to be a hero? Why would I actively seek out those that I try to avoid at all costs?”
Zenko, who was seated between you and Badd, shot you a questioning look.
“Why did you get strong, then, [Name]-san?” she asked.
You chewed on your bottom lip, gaze zeroing on the steaming bowl of ramen in front of you. You could feel the siblings’ eyes on you and you flushed a bright shade of red under their scrutiny.
“Well, I did because I’m scared of monsters,” you replied. “What if there’s no hero nearby to help me when a monster appeared? I don’t wanna get eaten, you know, or worse-” here, your voice turned hysterical and caught a few fellow customers’ attention “-get killed and have some creepy, gross monster do lewd things to my body!”
“Eh? Lewd?”
A flustered Badd covered Zenko’s ears a little too late and made her turn her gaze away from your disgusted and scared expression.
“No, no, don’t bother with that, Zenko,” said the S-Class, eye twitching at the insinuation of your words. “Just eat your ramen while it’s hot.”
“But I was asking [Name]-san a question-”
“Just eat your ramen,” Badd gently pressed his sister who rolled her eyes in return.
“Teenagers,” the little girl huffed exasperatedly.
Nevertheless, Badd kept on asking you if you wanted to be like him. He would tell you the privileges you could get as a hero, not to mention the salary you would be earning. You, on the other hand, would never get tired of telling him no. As if a coward like you would actively fight monsters as a job. You were better off staying as a civilian, no matter how strong you finally had been.
You just weren’t cut out for that hero gig.
---
ii.
Yeah, you trained to get strong so you could defend yourself from monsters and creepy people who would harass anyone they fancied. And like you told Badd time and again, you would never be a hero.
But you wouldn’t deny the fact that helping others when there weren’t heroes around would put a huge smile on your face and a fuzzy, warm feeling in your chest.
Growing up, your parents taught you that helping other people didn’t need a licence or a title. One just needed to have the drive and compassion to do so, lending your hand not because you’re a hero but because you’re a decent human being.
And wasn’t that what capable people should do regardless of their job or title?
However, helping people required courage - and you were sorely lacking on that department.
And truth be told, your aid would always be purely accidental. Well, more like your fight or flight instincts have switched your mind into autopilot whenever monsters come crashing wherever you were.
A monster resembling a humanoid iguana showing up in the shopping district while you were out buying groceries? Fight. You had kicked its head off its shoulders because its long tongue freaked you out.
Some giant and evil sentient tree started terrorizing the children at the park you usually frequented? Fight. You punched it to kingdom come when you felt some of its vines trying to creep up your shirt.
A weird humanoid octopus, harassing the ladies at a spa you once visited? Fight. What was left of the monster was a bloody smear on the walls after you’re through with him.
And perhaps your favorite was an honest-to-god giant fire-breathing worm which threatened to destroy the forest you had camped on when you felt like leaving the city for a few days. F i g h t. You blinked back into awareness bathed in the purple blood of the monster, its remains scattered as far as your gaze could reach.
The worst (or best?) part was that you were unaware of how you defeated them - your only confirmation that you yourself had beaten the monsters were from eyewitnesses themselves. People would ask you if you were a newbie from the Hero Association, and you would immediately shake your head no.
You even received an invitation from the Association itself to join their ranks, to which you gave an easy “nope!” as your reply.
Your main concern, however, was not H. A.’s incessant invitations for you to become a hero.
Alarmed at how you would seemingly black out before facing any monster who would disrupt your relatively peaceful life, you sat on your bed and put your head on your hands.
Was it really a fight or flight instinct that guided you during those moments, or was it just plain fight, your mind blanking out and your body moving on its own accord while you finish off any monster that came to your path?
What controls your body during those moments? Instinct? The primal urge to survive?
But how come you couldn’t remember even just a single moment of the fight?
You rubbed your face with your hands and nodded to yourself. Of course you remembered something. That fleeting moment of feeling fear grip the entirety of your existence, when thoughts of surviving another day no longer filled your mind as a monster turned its malevolent gaze on you. The feeling of wanting to throw up your swiftly beating heart out of your own seizing throat, and you breaking out into a cold sweat. Your hand closing into a fist for a punch or lifting a foot to deliver either a stomp or a kick in a hopeless attempt to defend yourself.
And then your world would turn black.
And always, automatically, you would return to awareness once your auto-piloted mind deemed the monster for the day well and truly dead.
Looking back on the times you were still a weakling, you had never experienced undergoing a fight or flight instinct as odd as what you were having now. If it had always been flight for you before, the former now seemed to overcompensate for your spinelessness now that you have gained more than enough physical strength to back it up.
(If you had come across a certain Dr. Genus and he had come to witness your power, he would go as far as to claiming that you were the second person he met to have removed their limiter.)
(And if you would ask him if it had affected your fight or flight instinct, he would have said yes: your instinct to flee had been erased by your instinct to fight, and your id would not stop until it had the pleasure of witnessing your assailants’ death.)
You disliked fighting, you were too cowardly to face it, even. And while being strong had given you a little reassurance that you could now go outside of your house without having the need to get Badd check up on you for your safety every now and again, you still avoided getting attention to yourself either from creepy guys or monsters. A huge scaredy-cat at heart, you kept your head as low as you could muster.
There was, however, one thing you seemed to be forgetting, something you seemed to have been born with and you wanted to live without.
You were the human equivalent of a magnet for the biggest and baddest of luck.
Fan-fucking-tastic.
And so you spend your days being chased by monsters, blacking out as your fight instinct took over, and wake up somewhat drenched in monster blood.
Man, when would heaven give you a break?
---
to be continued
#garou x reader#platonic metal bat x reader#garou#garou the hero hunter#garou the human monster#metal bat#badd#zenko#opm x reader#one punch man#one punch man season 2
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MEET THE MUSE!
TAGGED BY: @sengokujidai ( thank u bby ! ♡ )
TAGGING: @nghread ( dimitri ) , @hebakes , @ritohonour , @telesthisia , @zestirix ( sidon ) && you !
► Name ➔ kaihime narita / kai.
► Are you single ➔ sighs yes.....
► Are you happy ➔ of course !
► Are you angry? ➔ sometimes , but then people call me a bear !
► Are your parents still married ➔ they were , but my mother passed away.
NINE FACTS ► Birthplace ➔ saitama district , honshu.
► Hair Color ➔ mahogany.
► Eye Color ➔ hazel.
► Birthday ➔ july 22nd , 1572.
► Mood ➔ fiery , can be aggressive.
► Gender ➔ female.
► Summer or winter ➔ summer.
► Morning or afternoon ➔ afternoon.
EIGHT THINGS ABOUT YOUR LOVE LIFE ► Are you in love ➔ i , um — maybe ?
► Do you believe in love at first sight ➔ yes , how romantic !
► Who ended your last relationship ➔ what relationship ?! no need to rub it in !
► Have you ever broken someone’s heart ➔ i certainly hope not...
► Are you afraid of commitments ➔ why would i be ?!
► Have you hugged someone within the last week? ➔ of course , my lady !
► Have you ever had a secret admirer ➔ i don’t think so , no-one even looks at me...
► Have you ever broken your own heart? ➔ i hate to say it but... yes.
SIX CHOICES ► Love or lust ➔ love.
► Lemonade or iced tea ➔ tea.
► Cats or Dogs ➔ dogs.
► A few best friends or many regular friends ➔ few best friends , i won’t let my family down !
► Wild night out or romantic night in ➔ both sound like fun !
► Day or night ➔ day.
FIVE HAVE YOU EVERS ► Been caught sneaking out ➔ no.
► Fallen down/up the stairs ➔ yes... what ?! don’t laugh at me !
► Wanted something/someone so badly it hurt? ➔ yes...
► Wanted to disappear ➔ many times...
FOUR PREFERENCES ► Smile or eyes ➔ both , i simply can’t choose !
► Shorter or Taller ➔ taller.
► Intelligence or Attraction ➔ so long as they can keep up with me , either !
► Hook-up or Relationship ➔ relationships.
FAMILY ► Do you and your family get along ➔ of course , i would give my life for the hojo !
► Would you say you have a “messed up life” ➔ maybe this isn’t the life i would have chosen... but people are counting on me , i can’t let them down !
► Have you ever ran away from home ➔ why would i do such a thing ?!
► Have you ever gotten kicked out ➔ no.
FRIENDS ► Do you secretly hate one of your friends ➔ of course not , the hojo are my family !
► Do you consider all of your friends good friends ➔ yes.
► Who is your best friend ➔ my lady ! she’s strong && adorable — almost as adorable as me !
► Who knows everything about you ➔ my lord , my lady , all of the hojo ! we’re family , && together , nothing can stop us !
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I know nothing about the Terrible Teenaged Trinity AU or whatever, but imagine Fubuki bursting into Saitama's apartment (not to recruit him, it's just part of her daily routine), seeing Garou chilling in the back and having a fainting spell like a period drama maiden. Twenty minutes after the boys wake her up (Garou suggests smelling salts; Genos dunks her head in the sink) she's going over a list of expenses with Garou for the emotional damages she was made to suffer:
Anon OMG!
I love how Everyone ends up just randomly going to Saitama’s apartment just because, this cramped little apartment which was already crowded with one (1) tired egg and one (1) combat-optimized cyborg, nevermind a feral man, a bat-wielding man with aggression issues, an esper with a dramatic streak, an overgrown otaku and sometimes even an old man and his even more ancient brother... oh, and the beloved biker, once in a blue moon a tiny scientist with BIG hair and an affinity for big guns...
Fubuki throws manga at Garou. It’s a lot more effective at upsetting Saitama than it is Garou - his precious manga!!! Genos dives to save them before they fall to the floor and it’s just a huge mess
I like to think Badd is the type of guy who won’t swear in front of a lady and wallops Garou on the back of the head until he apologizes to her for, y’know, existing and having the nerve to stand over there... and then Genos too for dunking her head in the sink omg
Genos: “This did not hurt me, my brain is protected by a thick layer of-”
Badd: “ye ye, you’re thick-headed, we get it!”
Also, Saitama contemplating suing everyone/everything that offends him?? Beautiful. Wonderful. He only needs to go out in public and wait for people to start shouting mean things at him and he has a case.
“Genos, do you think we could sue that magazine that forgot to include the free sample of lipstick they promised? Would you still testify for me in court?”
“If Sensei wants lipstick, I can buy-”
“Nonono, it’s the principle.... it’s the potential money!”
(I think at the last second his Good Core kicks in and he can’t go through with it.... but it was a nice thought, wasn’t it..?)
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Higurashi New 2 | Wandering Witch 2 | Moriarty 1 | Taiso Samurai 1 | Kamisama 1 | Munou na Nana 2 | Golden Kamuy 3 1 (25) | Yashahime 2
I’m trying a seasonal challenge this time...so that means I have to leave some Crunchyroll anime to the side. That’s why I’m putting in the tags now.
Higurashi New 2
Apparently, now this Higurashi is called “Gou”…I dunno what that means in the context of this series, but *Saitama face* OK.
Is this girl…Rika? Or this Hanyuu girl I heard of on ANN? Update: Wait a bit from that point. You’ll get your answer.
Do they ever examine why the girls in Higurashi are what they are? Rika seems to have something supernatural going on, but Rena…is just a psycho girl right now, so it’s hard to care.
LOL, I was wondering where this “nipah” Rika meme came from, but it is present in the dialogue.
I predicted that Gilligan cu-er, transition far too easily…
Why is that kid’s face so tanned (?) in comparison to the rest of him???
How did these girls get up the building so fast??? (LOL?)
Wow, the cicada noise was pretty loud there, so…props to the sound guys for making that sound stifling.
Can we really trust what Mion is saying about Tomitake…?
I thought we were going to see Watanagashi in ep 3, but…okay.
Satoko speaks rather formally. She says kochira de gozaimasuyo! instead of kocchi! or kochiradesuyo!.
Who’s that blonde lady? Someone from Umineko?
The bright colours really help to sell the ominous nature of this ED and anime. I don’t think I understand everything that’s happening in said ED, though…
Gonna pause it here because I heard you need to watch the OG and Rei to understand this, now that the new Higurashi is operating under its “proper” name.
Wandering Witch 2
…Elaina’s a bit full of herself still…
…what the heck was that instrument playing over the titlecard? Bagpipes…?
LOL, it’s the Attack on Titan world!
Did Elaina lose her hat when she fell? That must be a very stable hat indeed.
Ooh, particle effects! However…there’s CGI here, although it’s only kinda noticeable.
Have you never heard of money…?
Wait, witches get discounts???
It seems Saya comes from Japan.
LOL, this is basically Quidditch without a snitch!
I like mushrooms, so I don’t get why people kick up such a fuss about them.
Saya seems to act like this is yuri bait…*sigh*
Saya’s crying like her sister died…c’mon, it’s not that bad!
I’m hitting pause. If this is actually how the series is, then it’s primed for a drop, but I can’t help but keep it on for the spectacular visuals and the fact it’s basically anime Harry Potter.
Taiso Samurai 1
I keep swearing I’ll finish my old simulcasts…but then new ones pop up like daisies…(I guess it’s better than having no anime to finish, right?)
I just realised how pretty Jotaro’s eyes are…! The fact he just sort of splats and then doesn’t get up shows how weary he is, unlike Sakura from Moon Land, who would’ve probably gotten up and never tried doing gymnastics again if he were in the same position.
Just by glancing over the results when I google for this Montreal gold, it seems it was done by a Kouhei Uchimura, but I might be wrong on that front…oh wait, there are 3 golds, so it’s not necessarily just that one…
You can tell this is 2002 because of that flip phone.
Intai Zamurai…it’s constructed the same way as the anime’s title. Two characters and then “samurai”.
BB (Big Bird) on the side there is so goofy, he’s…kind of distracting. <- Note the official website refers to Big Bird as BB, hence my use of it.
I was wondering if Rei was the daughter or the wife…so it’s the former.
Kinugawa Ropeway…it rings a bell, somehow. Maybe the Boueibu crew went there as DVD/BD extras.
…does everyone know that a ryokan is like a mini hotel with a traditional set-up?
*snorts* LOL, Keanu (Reeves, obviously).
That montage was a bit worrying…maybe the CGI took out part of the budget? I was a bit worried when I could tell there was CGI in that one starting segment.
…LOL, wut. Agent Smith (from the Matrix)?
Yamakasi seems to be a parkour thing which has its own movie.
…I’m sort of wondering: was that ninja a woman? If Jotaro gets another wife…I dunno if I’ll like the anime as much. Things could become far too dramatic if he did. Update: You do find out later in this episode.
I think – from lip reading – the ninja used -de gozaimasu. I remember getting it drilled into me that people don’t use that these days, but in the time of ninja and samurai, they did.
…another anime set in Ikebukuro. I knew from the station, but…’bukuro must be a nice place if people are reppin’ it all of a sudden.
Was Tomoyo an actress…?
“Kinugawa, as in the river where ogres get mad?” – See, that’s the pun I made about Boueibu’s Atsushi years ago…
This Takizawa guy’s so expressive, LOL.
Gotta love a man in a suit, yes…
…they keep building up to this retirement, only for him to not retire??? Which is it?! (LOL) That declaration works better in Japanese because the -shimasen goes at the end of the sentence so the weird sentence structure in the English translation actually makes Jotaro look like he really messed up due to nervousness speaking in front of crowds. Update: He just sounds like he stopped in the middle of a sentence in Japanese, which he obviously did.
There’s no time travel for sure, but there are ninjas! Plus dudes in jumpsuits!...plus, of course, gymnastics! It could still work, but I keep swearing there’s something supernatural coming around the corner for this…Also, this “gymnast trying to retire” thing seems to be drawing me in because of my whole current lack of direction in basically everything, much like Rikuo of Sing Yesterday for Me.
Kamisama 1
Hmm…Kamisama ni Natta Hi…it doesn’t say the subject stating this became a god, so the pronoun could be “she” or “you” rather than “I”, which seems to be the current standard for it. Update: It says on the title card “I”, so it should have an I then…I guess(?)
There’s a fish on the logo.
…this girl, I already know her name is Hina. That’s the 2nd Odin this season (the first is in Sigdrifa…or however it’s spelt)…she’s gonna be annoying, isn’t she…?
What’s this about a date…?
There are two Izanamis this season, too. The second is Hifumi from HypMic.
Looks like there was an accident, according to one of the signs.
…This feels exactly like a visual novel. I’m surprised it’s an original.
I was wondering why “Key Ramen” (Kagi Ramen) sounded weird…then it hit me. Key! You motherf**kers!!! *shakes fist* You were hiding right under my nose all along!
Hey, Potato-kun! (I know his name is Youta, but…eh, aside from having a possible girlfriend candidate and being a Nice Guy, he’s still a Potato-kun.) Stop staring in disbelief and do something!
…Why Potato-kun, anyway? Is it because his name means “become god”???
…This Izanami is so emotionless…it’s hard to imagine her cheering, Youta was right on that front.
…that style in Hina’s background…I’m pretty sure I’ve seen it for Sailor Moon Crystal, but I’ve forgotten what the artist’s name is (the one that inspired that artstyle)…
I almost expected Hina to interrupt the confession, like Leo from Taiso Samurai.
I kinda just shrugged near the end of the episode and finished it just to see if the confession would be interrupted, so…big fat drop there. I must not like much Key beyond Angel Beats (and even then, it’s only okay because it’s the relic of a time gone by).
Moriarty 1
I’ve been picking up Sherlock-related things left and right ever since I was a fan of Detective Conan…not Sherlock, Elementary or that Robert Downey Jr. movie, but the stuff Conan Doyle had his hands in. (I’d also like to keep an eye out for that Miyazaki movie, but I don’t know if I can/should go out of my way for it.) Therefore, I was a pretty easy mark for a bishonen Moriarty.
Who’s this “El” guy anyway?
…That OP is basically Black Butler all over again. I admit I went, “Oh, stuff this” for a second when I saw Rasmus Faber’s name on credits – when I went to entire series for him, they always ended badly for me – but I couldn’t stop watching the episode (since I skipped forward to the actual episode due to background noise), so this might be the anime to change everything.
I’ll be real with you – aside from Japan, America and China (the former two of which I’ve gone to and the latter I’ve technically gone to Hong Kong, which I have stronger ties to anyway), I honestly don’t have anywhere on my bucket list. That said, anime (obviously, the London arc from DC was a big factor) and this one movie called What a Girl Wants have been pretty instrumental in making Great Britain…almost make the list of places I want to go to. Key word: almost.
…I want a dub. With accents like Princess Principal.
Also, I forgot Soma Saito was our Moriarty…LOL.
“…for Man of Standing” (sic).
Turn the other cheek, Mr. Tailor.
The eyes really tell you everything about a person in this anime.
Ooh, this has absolutely no holes in its logic. It’s a strong contender!
Yashahime 2
Holy s***, is that Kagome’s brother?(!) He kinda reminds me of Takagi from Detective Conan for some reason…
Come to think of it…writers like Takahashi don’t normally have androgynous leads like Towa, do they?
That was…not the best fight scene, man.
Ooh, naginata. I’ve read a bit about them, but I’ve never really seen one used in an anime before…not to my memory. Not even the naginata in Touken Ranbu (plural) can help with that.
…this Rainbow Pearl business reminds me of Sailor Moon’s…uh, whatever they’re called…Rainbow Crystals, that’s right.
There’s something oddly comfy about predicting the “it won’t be my crying face, it’s yours you’ll get!” line, as bad as that sign may be for predictability on the whole.
I’ve felt in the years leading up to now, the progressive nations are slowly causing the entire gender binary to unravel. The more I think about my own relationship with my concept of gender – I accept gender-neutral third-person pronouns because initially I wanted to be anonymous on the internet, but now I’m just generally fine with it, for instance – the more I can agree and yet also disagree because of the progress the LGBTIQ+ community has made in recent years.
Munou na Nana 2
Ah-hah! People were calling it that the enemies of humanity were actually the superpowered kids and this proves it.
Ah, I think this Shibusawa is Masuda. I was here for him, so here he is.
Nana just says konnichiwa, which is the most basic of Japanese greetings. I don’t think it was phrased as a question, so…why did the subbers go with that?
Nana keeps breaking her chopsticks by leaving a bit at the end.
Lemme guess…Shibusawa’s talent is actually reversing time, not stopping it.
Is…that Shibusawa Nana’s giving flowers to…?
Golden Kamuy 3 1 (25)
If this is episode 25, was this always planned as a split-cour with season 2? I wonder…
Lingonberries! Oh, lingonberries! They’re those berries Ikea puts into their jam, right? (I’ve never tasted a lingonberry, but…yeah. That’s how I know of them.)
The sign says “Hurep Honpo” (backwards, as some older Japanese/Chinese things do), so it really just says “hurep” (since “honpo” = main shop). Update: Hurep actually means “lingonberry” and not the berry wine like I thought it did here, so it says “hurep wine” after all.
Thank goodness for 2D bears! (LOL)
Ratel?...uh, honey badger! That’s what they’re called in English!
…uh, and then it turns out to be a wolverine. I don’t know my Mustelidae, it seems.
There’s nothing like someone throwing a wolverine to know this is Golden Kamuy…(as weird as that sounds.)
…what was that random line about boobs about…? (Maybe it was just said to be random…?)
…ohhhhhhhh. These yellow eyes work much better than the standard red eyes you see in Munou na Nana or Moriarty. They’re so sinister.
Why did it suddenly change to an interview style…? Weren’t we waiting for a fight? Update: Seems the answer is “padding”. Not that I mind, I think it was interesting actually. Do more of that if you can.
#simulcast commentary#Golden Kamuy#Higurashi: When They Cry - New#Higurashi: When They Cry - Gou#Kamisama ni Natta Hi#The Day I Became a God#Taiso Samurai#Gymnastics Samurai#Moriarty the Patriot#Yuukoku no Moriarty#Wandering Witch: The Journey of Elaina#Majo no Tabitabi#Chesarka watches Taiso Samurai#Chesarka watches Yuukoku no Moriarty#Munou na Nana#Talentless Nana#hanyo no yashahime#Chesarka watches Yashahime
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*opm webcomic spoilers...5th time?*
I read from chapter 125 to 128 this time, and as far as I know 128 is the most recent chapter (if I’m wrong please tell me so I can for real catch up), and WOW.
So we start with the introduction of the Neo heroes, like Accel who leads this super powerful team of ppl in hero suits,,Raiden, a super large and strong sumo who immediately tests Superalloy, some cult leader with god powers or sum, and Webigaza, a super famous idol girl who was always jealous of Amai and underwent PSP training/brain surgeries and cyborg reconstruction. There’s a few others introduced, like a gangster leader, a financer and hero, and a super wanted criminal working for the Neos. So far I really love the set up for the NH, and I’m really happy we have another lead lady, I really think Opm needs that. (Also I love Webigaza’s clothes like wow 😳)
I’d already been a little spoiled on it, but I knew that Blast’s son would be a big part of it. I wonder if he was taken care of his father, or if he was like dropped off to be adopted bc Blast didn’t care? Also is Blue a cyborg? I can’t tell. It’s surprising he even has a son-nobody even knows who he is, how did he get with someone??
So the neo heroes go out and kick some ass of course, and Child Emperor is there and thinks about the armor they’re all wearing and *possible manga spoilers* he realizes Blast was most likely the creator of the suits, and thinks oh god is Blast trying to become a dictator over the H.A. and NH? Now, in the manga Drive Knight reveals to Genos and Sekingar that MK had betrayed the HA and given classified info and tech to the monster association, so I wonder how they’ll incorporate the NH arc with MK’s betrayal in the manga?
We see Blue fighting and stuff, and it cuts to the HA arguing, and them all realizing they’ll prob be cut off from funds soon, and LMAO Saitama really did join all of those heroes in the march, good for him.
And finally the chapter ends when Sukio is about to fight a robot seeking info on King, much like before. Wow...I can’t believe I’m all caught up with the webcomic! I can’t wait to read more of the manga, especially what changes ONE and Muruata make.
EDIT: k so chapter 128 is NOT the most recent one, but I am caught up now lol
#opm#genos#onepunchman#webcomic spoilers#opm webcomic#webigaza#saitama#child emperor#drive knight#opm manga spoilers
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OPM Manga Chapter 122 Review: Insane
“Imagine you’re sliding down a banister and suddenly, without warning, it turns into a razor blade...”
That’s a paraphrase of a joke a kid told Stephen King, which he recounted in his excellent book ‘On Writing’ (get it if you like writing fiction of any sort!). Childrens’ imaginations are full of sudden horrors that manifest themselves out of seemingly mundane situations: the monster under the bed, the lady who appears in order to strangle you if you say her name too many times, the tree that will steal your breath if you nap under it... That’s okay, that’s why kids have grown ups to keep them safe.
And when there are no grown ups? That’s when you get Mr. Teddy and to help you fight the nightmares away. I think Murata has done fantastic work in illustrating a child’s worst nightmare: when the nightmare becomes real, when your weapons turn back into toys, and no one can help. Just as Child Emperor had Evil Natural Water all but frozen into the World’s Evillest Natural Icicle, a Sludge Jellyfish shows up, smouldering with as much rage as from the fire. And what happens next is a bit unexpected: Evil Natural Water drinks Sludge Jellyfish dry.
a slight feeling of foreboding descends
Child Emperor may be surprised, but simple rules interacting can produce very complex behaviour. Evil Natural Water (hereafter ENW) has two rules: 1. Target any individuals showing negative emotion and 2. Gather water to itself. For monsters, being nasty is a positive emotion, so they’re not usually targeted; however Sludge Jellyfish has an intense grudge against Child Emperor, thus becoming a source of negative emotion to target. Sludge Jellyfish’s water was admixed with oil, so ENW got the necessary fluid to continue attacking the other source of negative emotion in the room, Child Emperor. It looks very clever and goal-driven, but it’s not.
Where did the oil come from? Cast your mind back to chapter 97:
even simple throwaway gags come back as much more serious devices
And the outcome is one of the most searing panels ever, as a wounded Child Emperor stares at a manifest nightmare.
brrr....
This turkey is pro-Christmas
(cultural note: being from the UK as I am, Christmas is the occasion we eat turkey. Feel free to mentally substitute Thanksgiving if you’re American)
As we’d hoped, Genos is making all haste for the Monster Association. He’s reading the information Drive Knight left... directly off the screen he’s projected onto the inside of his left eye.
Really? Did you learn nothing about not sticking drives of unknown provenance into any computing system whose integrity you value? Oh, it’s a dire emergency and you’re in a hurry? That’s true, but don’t go crying to Saitama if you find one day that your secret lab has been stripped bare and your doctor kidnapped or worse.
Reasonably, he’s not wasting any time reading about the demon-level monsters: as he is, they’re just bigger sacks of rubbish to kick out of the way. The problem is the cadres. And what he’s reading is not comforting information -- I’m glad there’s more detailed information in finer point script than we can read or I’d feel cheated. He’s got no doubt about their strength, having crossed arms with two of them already. Nor any illusion that any other S-Class heroes other than Tatsumaki or King(Saitama) can take them on without careful planning.
no wonder Drive Knight decided to just grab the cat and run
If Drive Knight had handed this information into the HA at any point before the heroes attacked, they could have planned so much better. If Genos had more time, he could have prepared speciality weapons and picked which monsters to target, much like Drive Knight did for Nyan. But as it is, there’s no time for clever plans. His solution? Run in faster... and hope that maybe Saitama’s already killed the monsters.
I’m sorry -- you’re going to meet ALL of them, minus Orochi, unless he’s not actually dead dead and reawakens. In which case, I’m very sorry.
[Aside: this is quite a big change from the webcomic, where Genos only speculated about the possibility of dragon-level monsters, having only ever met Carnage Kabuto beforehand. Here, he knows exactly what he’s up against. And is still going in. Madness or courage, you decide.]
If I’ve likened Genos to a turkey acting against its very interests, then what can I call Saitama and Flash? They’re just turkeys.
“S-Class is Insane”
Hoo, finally! The manga finally gets to the origin of Class S and why it was set up in the first place. I like this translation and the additional panel the manga adds to make clear that a hard-working hero is definitely rewarded by the ranking system, even if they’re not very strong.
But diligence is not enough to deal with the occasional big monsters that pop up. The insane Class S was created to recognise and pull together the very few heroes with the proven ability to single-handedly defeat a demon-level monster as the big monsters got termed. Regardless of their class, ranking, or how they otherwise worked.
And Saitama? He totally should be the perfect hero to be recognised and raised to Class S. But it’s hard to get rewarded when he doesn’t even know what he smacked, never mind even remember what he smacked, never mind think to take credit for:
When you’re so strong that Orochi was just a noisier piece of shit, and Boros was almost interesting (and then he got annoying, so you killed him), it’s hard to know you should be given special recognition.
In the meantime though, the more mortal Class S heroes are showing themselves to be merely mortal, one by one:
Hang in there guys!
Help isn’t coming, but hang in there anyway!
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My Top 10 Romantic Anime
1. Science Fell in Love, So I Tried to Prove It
Shinya Yukimura and Ayame Himuro are young but extremely brilliant researchers of the Saitama University, and both of them strongly believe in math as the most powerful instrument at Mankind's disposal to understand all things.
So, when Ayame suddenly confesses her feelings to Shinya, he decides to start an ambitious experiment with his whole team to answer a question: is it possible to explain something complicated like love using a mathematical approach?
2. My Love Story!!
The story follows Takeo Gōda, a tall and muscular student who doesn't have much luck with women, as every girl he likes ends up falling for his best friend, Makoto Sunakawa, who is charming and good-looking. This all changes when he saves Rinko Yamato, a petite shy girl who, above all other expectations, falls in love with Takeo, beginning a unique love story.
3. Amnesia
On the morning of August 1st, a girl wakes up to find she has lost all her memories before the day. A boy appears in front of her and tells her that he is a spirit named Orion, whose spirit collided with hers and caused her amnesia. He wishes to help her collect her lost memories. One day, she receives a phone call from an unknown person. She struggles not to let them notice that she doesn't remember him but...
4. Junjou Romantica
The series focuses on three storylines: the main couple (Junjou Romantica) which comprises the bulk of the books, and two other male couples (Junjou Egoist and Junjou Terrorist) that provide ongoing side stories.
Junjou Romantica is the storyline following the relationship between Misaki Takahashi and Akihiko Usami. Misaki is struggling to prepare for his college entrance exams, so his brother arranges for a private tutor. But Misaki’s nightmare is just beginning when his tutor, Usami, comes on to him! How will Misaki ever manage to pass his exam? And why does he feel so mysteriously drawn to Usami?
Junjou Egoist is the storyline following the relationship between Hiroki Kamijou and Nowaki Kusama. Just when Kamijou’s life is at its lowest, he has a chance meeting with a man who never lets anything hold him back: Nowaki. His name means "typhoon," and he’s about to take Kamijou on a whirlwind ride that will turn everything upside-down.
Junjou Terrorist is the storyline following the relationship between Yoh Miyagi and Shinobu Takatsuki. Miyagi always seems to shrug off the cares of the world with a joke and a smile. But even he has problems, although he doesn't let them show. Foremost is Shinobu, a relentless young man who’s adamant that they’re destined to be together.
Junjou Mistake is the storyline following the relationship between Ryuuichiro Isaka and Kaoru Asahina. The story is a single spin-off volume outside of the series but also has a few chapter and an episode featuring the couple in the series.
5. I Can't Understand What My Husband Is Saying
The series centers around the daily lives of Kaoru, a hard working office lady, and her husband Hajime, who is an otaku, an obsessed fan of anime and manga culture, and who works as a blogger. Using popular anime and otaku tropes and in-jokes, the characters explore the conflicts and similarities between daily life and otaku culture in urban Japan.
6. Acchi Kocchi
The serious-minded Io and the pure-hearted Tsumiki feel they never want to be parted, but haven't become a couple yet. More than friends but less than lovers, they develop an awkward quasi-romance.
7. Yuri on Ice
Reeling from his crushing defeat at the Grand Prix Finale, Yuuri Katsuki, once Japan's most promising figure skater, returns to his family home to assess his options for the future. At age 23, Yuuri's window for success in skating is closing rapidly, and his love of pork cutlets and aptitude for gaining weight are not helping either.
However, Yuuri finds himself in the spotlight when a video of him performing a routine previously executed by five-time world champion, Victor Nikiforov, suddenly goes viral. In fact, Victor himself abruptly appears at Yuuri's house and offers to be his mentor. As one of his biggest fans, Yuuri eagerly accepts, kicking off his journey to make it back onto the world stage. But the competition is fierce, as the rising star from Russia, Yuri Plisetsky, is relentlessly determined to defeat Yuuri and win back Victor's tutelage.
8. Lovely Complex
Love is unusual for Koizumi Risa and Ootani Atsushi, who are both striving to find their ideal partner in high school—172 cm tall Koizumi is much taller than the average girl, and Ootani is much shorter than the average guy at 156 cm. To add to their plights, their crushes fall in love with each other, leaving Koizumi and Ootani comically flustered and heartbroken. To make matters worse, they're even labeled as a comedy duo by their homeroom teacher due to their personalities and the stark difference in their heights, and their classmates even think of their arguments as sketches.
Lovely★Complex follows Koizumi and Ootani as they encourage each other in finding love and become close friends. Apart from their ridiculous antics, they soon find out an unexpected similarity in their music and fashion tastes. Maybe they possess a chemistry yet unknown, but could love ever bloom between the mismatched pair?
9. Special A
Hikari Hanazono has always been able to do things that normal people cannot. As a child, she assumed no one could beat her—until she met Kei Takishima. Thinking she would win, Hikari challenged him to a match. But things didn’t go as planned; she lost not once but each time she rechallenged him. From that point on, she has sworn to best Kei at everything, ranging from academics to athletics.
To achieve her goal, Hikari enrolls in the same school as Kei—Hakusenkan, a prestigious institute for the wealthy. As a pair, they hold the top two rankings in school and are among seven of the academy's best students in a class known as Special A.
While Hikari treats Kei as a rival, she is completely oblivious that he harbors hidden feelings for her. Together, the members of Special A deal with competition, friendship, and just a bit of love.
10. Senryuu Girl
The story focuses on the relationship between Nanako Yukishiro, a girl who only communicates through senryū written on tanzaku, and Eiji Busujima, an ex-delinquent who attempts to write his own senryū. The story follows their different takes on everyday life through their senryu.
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